#archaeologist don't jump me

[handweavers]

Can you recommend any podcasts about anything history related, maybe even specifically about imperialism and war? I’m always wary to start podcasts about those topics when I’m not sure of where the hosts stand

i use pocket casts as my podcast 'hub' so ill link to them all thru there but you can also find them through whichever app you prefer

ancient history & prehistory - tides of history is consistently excellent, interviews archaeologists and historians currently working in the field and makes an effort to highlight issues in the field, address misconceptions about various ancient peoples and jumps around the globe a lot so it's not eurocentric, the host emphasizes social history/the lives of every day people, and i know that he is a fellow traveller

current events regarding war and imperialism - rania khalek dispatches, she's a lebanese-american journalist based in beirut and interviews a lot of left wing anti-imperialist journalists and scholars and activists, her reporting is consistently excellent and explicitly marxist & materialist, i love her. she works for breakthrough news which is also a good news site for similar reasons

war and imperial history and current events - radio war nerd is a classic. lots of interviews with left wing anti imperialist scholars and activists, series where they cover histories of various conflicts and empires, ongoing coverage of wars and genocides. they did a series on the us civil war that was great. they do talk about the weapons of war, tactics and strategy, etc more than the others on this list do which could be a pro or a con depending on who you are, but it's always interesting.

history of american imperialism - blowback, genuinely the best 'primer' to american empire in the podcast space. each season is a different war - they've covered the iraq war, the cuban revolution, the korean war, and most recently the history of american empire in afghanistan. if you can't/don't want to pay for premium there are bootleg feeds out there (i can send you one if you dm me lol)

irish revolutionary history - revolutionary ireland, not as much to say about this one but it's excellent and his accent is lovely lol

[shinyrhinestones]

Two doors down

Summary: Reader has had a bad day, and tries to cheer herself up by going to a party she has been invited to, where she ends up meeting a cute boy. (Yes, it’s based on the Dolly Parton song). Reader doesn’t work at the BAU.

Pairing: Spencer Reid X Fem!Reader

Category: Oneshot

Genre: Fluff and smut.

Warnings: Alcohol, partying, kissing, Reader has quite long hair, Reader is studying to become an archaeologist, but Reader is about the same age as Spencer. Smut, soft intercourse, petting, protected intercourse, making-out.

This is my first time writing a little more explicit so it might not be that good…

Also English isn’t my mother tongue, so there will probably be some mistakes.

———————————————————————-

Bad days happen, and that's okay. But they definitely don't make the targeted person feel very good. I guess, it's only a bad day if you let it be. But honestly today had just been straight up a horrible day, and I wasn't sure if any of that could be saved. The day wasn't over yet, but still, it felt like alot to make up for. First of all, the weather had been horrible. It was raining heavily. Thunder coming every now and then giving me a shock, because of how loud it is. Everything had been so irritating today. My sleeves kept getting stuck onto doorhandles, kept dropping things and my hair wouldn't cooperate with me.

The rain drops had felt like sharp diamant pieces falling onto my skin and hair. I had let out a deep sigh entering the warm building of my school. But it was the most uncomfortable feeling in the world sitting on those unbearable chairs in my school, and just walking around in general with completely wet and soaked socks and pants. And my long hair dripping onto the floor. My classmates had been obnoxious. Maybe I just felt that way, because I was already in a bad mood and on edge.

I had completely forgotten about the whole party my friend, Elle was having. Work had been taking up my whole mind that day, that when I looked at my calender I almost had a heart attack. Luckily, I didn't need to worry about the weather and having to find a way of transportation in it, because Elle lived just two doors down from my apartment.

I didn't know what to wear or if what I wanted to wear was even clean. So I decided to worry about that later, and jumped into the shower. One thing at a time.

The warm shower, helped with relaxing and clearing my mind. Also, that meant my hair could sit better, than it had the whole day. I found some clothes that fit a party, like the one I was going to. It wasn't going to be anything wild, but just a gathering with some music and games. I never really went to wild parties anyways.

-

Music was playing at a fitting volume, with people chatting and some playing games like limbo. It was entertaining watching how low people could get until it was just impossible, unless you wanted to break a bone. I was watching some of them, smiling and laughing at it. I did feel a little tired, rubbing my eyes here and then, but I found the athmospehere of my friends apartment too comforting to leave. Also, I didn't want to just show up and then quickly scram from the whole event. Unless, I had a good exuse, and I didn't. So I was sitting there on her black couch, leaning an elbow on my leg and resting my head on my fist. I had a can of beer infront of me, but I had only taken like one sip from it. I really wasn't in the mood for getting drunk or being hungover. I felt the weight on the couch shift when a young man sat next to me. I looked over shortly to see who it was, and to my surprise I didn't recognize him. I knew everyone else at the party, except for him. I straigthened my posture a bit, studied his side profile as he looked at the limbo that was happening. He had a sharp jawline, cute button nose and dark hair. Hair that wasn't to short nor was it too long. "Hi"I softly said. The man turned to me, with raised eyebrows and curious eyes. I already loved staring into those brown doe eyes. "Hi" He replied. A small vague smile formed on my face, and I could see one on his face too. "I'm Y/N" I said, and studied his face further.

"I'm Spencer" He said like he had been holding a long breath. He nodded a little at me, as his way of greeting me, and I must've mirrored his gesture. "How do you know Elle?" I asked, and started fidgeting with the can. The can had gone warm, after just sitting on the coffee table for so long. "I work with her. We're really good friends from work" His lips went into a straight line alot of the time, and I couldn't stop staring at them. They were pink and looked so kissable.

Elle had recently gotten the opening at the BAU as a profiler. Maybe that was why she held this little party, to celebrate in a way. I'm not sure. She didn't say so. I looked over at Elle, who was already eyeing me and Spencer. She smiled at me, and then looked back at the game she was occupied with.

"At the BAU?" I asked, knowing the answer already. But it was just to hear more from that pretty mouth of his. He nodded. "Yes, we work as profilers." He said a little low, like he didn't actually want me to hear him. I felt a warm feeling spreading through my chest, just by looking at him. His own fingers were fidgeting, and he looked around alot. Behind me, infront of himself and only managed eye contact for a few seconds. He tucked his hair behind his ears, and I really wanted to touch it myself. Run my fingers through his dark hair and feel the hopefully soft and nice feeling. I could only imagine it being delicate.

"How do you know her?" He wondered. "I met Elle, when I moved here. I wanted to see if law enforcement was for me, and during my search for maybe my law enforcement education I met Elle. She worked with sex crimes." He smiled the whole time I was trying to find the right words, for my explanation. He nodded along the whole time. "So did you choose law enforcement?" He asked. "No. It felt like there was other great stuff out there for me. I think law enforcement would've been fun, but I feel like there was just more fun stuff out there" I tried to explain my best, but I was truly nervous around this beautiful man. Everytime I meet a handsome man, I find it hard to not be anxious just a little. I bounced my leg up and down, looking around the apartment. The window had been opened to probably ease the smell of alcohol. A cold breeze was lingering in the apartment. Cars were driving by and stars were shining down onto earth. "So what do you do?" "I am studying. I want to become an archaeologist."

Spencer had seemed very intrigued by my interest in history, and talked to me almost all evening about facts and stories including the past. I listened to him, finding it cute the way he was talking and rambling. And honestly, I was happy to have met someone who was interested in something I was. After alot of talking, people were moving over to the living room to rest, and sat down around where me and Spencer had been sitting.

"Hey, do you want to maybe go somewhere more private? A lot of people are moving over here. We could talk about it more, if we just moved." I leaned in close to Spencer, so only he could hear me. My voice was almost a whisper. Spencer felt my breath on him, which only made his fluttering heart go wilder.

He'd been feeling so lucky to have been able to keep a conversation with a stranger, and that that person made him feel that special and rare feeling inside.

"Oh..yeah- uhm..sure" He looked down, not being able to look at me anymore. I could see a small blush being painted onto his pretty cheeks. I stood up, and waited for him to follow my lead.

I stopped walking for a moment to talk to him shortly. "We could just go to my place, it's in the same building"

Spencer had agreed with a shy: Yes. And a nod.

-

Elle had given me a funny look, when I told I was leaving as Spencer did too.

But it didn’t really matter what Elle was thinking because I was now in my own apartment with a guy who was very attractive both physically and personally.

He was shy, kind, clever, sweet and understanding. He seemed to actually listen and be interested in what I was saying. I did go to school with a bunch of people who are also interested in it, but none of those people made me feel the way Spencer did. He had a soft nature to him, and it was almost like I could see the goodness ray and shine around him.

“You have a nice place.” He complimented. I wasn’t sure if he felt obligated to say that, but I appreciated the kindness.

“Thank you.” I replied, and sat down on my couch. “You can look around if you want” I’m not sure why I said that, to a man who I just had met, but it slipped.

He looked through some of the books I read, and kept going on these ramblings about facts and whatnot about what these books reminded him of. And I just sat there and listened with a soft smile, and probably pink cheeks.

He sat down next to me, and a small silence filled. He didn’t really look at me, when he sat down. But at one moment he did, and that’s when my I didn’t even think before I acted. I kissed him, and brought my hands up to his face. I let my hands caress his cheeks, and up to his hair. I felt his own hands wrap around my body holding me closer than before. His lips were so soft. I could feel every single butterfly basking it’s wings in my belly.

At one point we had to pull away for air.

We just looked at each other. In to the others eyes, studying them. I know, I could look into his pretty ones for an eternity. I tilted my head while looking at him. My arms rested around his neck, and his were still around me. They were careful and gentle. His hands were large and honestly so beautiful.

Then I kissed him again. I swear I could see the almost hypnotized look in his eyes, and the way his breath got caught in his throat. But he melted into the kiss, just like his body did. I couldn’t keep my hands away from his hair. He started to lay his body on top of mine, which I was only happy to experience. Feeling his weight on me, but of course he didn’t lay all of his weight on me. But it still felt nice to have him so close.

As we laid there just kissing and letting our hands wander on each other, we both got more into it.

So I asked him. Carefully though. I really didn’t want to make him uncomfortable, but I wouldn’t know if he wanted to if I didn’t ask. He seemed completely hypnotized in some way. He mumbled a yes, and I had pushed him off me to sit up on the couch both of us. I think that had scared him. That he had done something wrong, but that was not my intention at all. I just wanted to ask him about his boundaries and what he likes, and then I told him my own aswell. I’ve always found it important to know each others boundrasies and no-go’s in order to have a good time together.

I normally wouldn’t really have gone this far with someone I’ve only known for a few hours.

I guess, the reason why I did it was because I had had a bad day and just needed something to relieve all of my tension and frustration.

I remember holding his hand and guiding him to my bedroom, with him following me like a puppy in a crowd.

The light in my room wasn’t too bright because I just turned on the bedside lamp. I went over to close the door, and when I turned around Spencer was sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting for me. I decided to just lay down on the bed guiding him on me.

He started kissing down my neck and went down to my collarbone. His hands slid under my blouse, and caressed the skin under. I had reached for the buttons on his shirt and started unbuttoning them. I immediately let my hands roam over the already exposed skin on his chest. We didn’t even break the kiss, while we snuck our hands under each others clothing.

But at one point we had to break the kiss to get off each others clothing completely. Being intimate with Spencer was a time worth remembering. He was a lover who really cared.

We were both bare at this point. He had taken my shirt off and didn’t even throw it. He just let it fall from his grip onto the edge of the bed, not even looking where it landed. He kissed down my neck and down my collarbone. I sighed, and my hands ran through his dark hair. His hands slowly and carefully brushed down my belly, and right when he was to touch my most sensitive spot, he looked up at me.

His brown puppy dog eyes looked up at me through his eyelashes. “Can I?” His voice was low and comforting in a way. “Yes” I looked back at him with a subtle smile, resting my weight on my elbows. He ghosted his middle finger above my already wet folds. He didn’t put any pressure yet. He kissed my belly and kissed down my hips, and then let lingering kisses on my inner thighs. I closed my eyes, enjoying the gentleness from a man like him.

I opened my eyes again, looking at how pretty he was exploring me. He caressed one of my thighs with one of his large hands. His other hand softly sliding through my folds, before hus middle finger ended upon my clit. He started to rub his finger against it in circles. I started panting just a little, my breath getting heavier. I let out a barely audible whine, but because it was quiet in my quite small flat, and it was just me and him, he heard it.

I reached for a condom in drawer of my nightstand.

“Could you wear protection?” I asked so I wasn’t just doing stuff without being thoughtful.

He noddded. “Oh- No, yes of course”

I remember how his eyes were observing my figure. He looked completely star struck. I probably had the same look on my face. It was rare for me to see a man who was handsome, cute and beautiful but Spencer was definitely all of those. His eyes were a mix of brown and green, shining with admiration. His hair framed his face perfectly even though it was messy, and all over the place.

My finger traced down his nose. I opened the condom and let the wrapper be on the bedside table.

He had been hard ever since I guided him on top of me. He was holding himself up with his hands on the sides of me. I put it on him, and held him closer to me right when I got it on him.

I kissed him and he immediately kissed back. His thumbs were sliding up the sides of my waist and I slowly guided him towards my entrance. I sighed, and held my arms around him, caressing every now and then. Before I let him enter I reached my hand down to wrap my hand around him, and letting it stroke a few times. His eyes fluttered, and he let out a short moan. Hearing him moan like that, made me a little impatient. It only made me want more of him. I kissed his jawline and then left kisses on his throat, holding him closer to reach him.

I then guided him towards my entrance letting him enter this time. I took in a breath, feeling him like this was a little surreal. This man was so sweet, and here I was being this intimate with him. Spencer let out soft moan, and kissed him on my lips. He didn’t move, until I let one hand reach his lower back and told him to.

“Move Spencer” I whispered against his delicate skin. I whined when he started to move at a steady pace. I knew he was trying to hold in his own sounds. I saw him biting his bottom lip, and how he only let out small huffs every now and then.

“I wanna hear you, Spencer” I said in between breaths. Everytime he hit a spot that really felt good I let out a real moan. But it wasn’t that loud. Not that it didn’t feel good, but normally I’m not that loud. Whenever someone would be moaning with their chest I knew they were faking it. Its supposed to come from the down in the stomach, where the pleasure shoots up. He hid his face in the crook of my neck, before he finally let himself relax and let sounds and noises go.

I closed my eyes, and held him as close as I could. “Hold me” I muttered and he immediately obeyed. His long arms and large hands held me securely but gently in his grip. His chest close to mine.

I’m not really sure how much time had passed, but I guess that doesn’t really matter. All that matters is that it felt good. He was doing it just right, hitting the right spot inside of me. I was panting much heavier now along with Spencer. I felt it building up in my stomach. “I’m almost there” I said almost breathless. “Spencer” I barely whined. His lips parted a little his eyes studying me before he let out: “Oh god” I felt his thrusts getting more slow, but it still added onto the heavenly feeling. My body tensed. I held onto him for dear life, letting out a choked moan. He started leaving butterfly kisses on my jawline, before he let more lingering kisses on my neck. My back arched a little, and my head leaned into his touch.

Shortly after I felt himself let go. I heard his low moan, and felt his body almost collapse on me. His body was sweaty and his eyes closed in a moment of bliss. I relaxed in his embrace and let myself rest against my bed. I let out a final sigh and Spencer smiled at the sight of me. I saw his soft smile at me, when my eyelids fluttered open. A breathy giggle came out of me, and I caressed his cheeks, as he leaned his face into my hands. He crawled next to me and sat up. I admired his figure, before I got up myself to get cleaned up just like him.

Even though the day had started badly it ended up becoming a good day. Or atleast a better day.

———————————————————————

[alexjcrowley]

You know what I am fucking tired of inly talking of anglophone media on here

I am URGING everybody who see this post to watch the I Can Quit Whenever I Want trilogy (in italian: Smetto quando voglio) and I am going to convince you to watch it because it's hilarious and it's good and its only sin is not being an american/british product. (Also I found out there's a Spanish movie inspired by it, but I am talking about the italian trilogy).

Take Breaking Bad. A college neurobiologist professor desperately needs money, so he decides to start making drugs. Because he is a genius, though, he creates the formula of a new drug that, being new, isn't technically illegal. You follow me?

Okay, now let's give it a Ocean's 11 twist. To create and sell these drugs, Neurobiologist Professor needs the help of a few friends. These friends are all brilliant laureates, with several PhDs, who, due to corrupt state of Italian academia, are forced into minum wage jobs: you got two latinists working at a gas station, a chemist washing dishes at a Chinese restaurant, an anthropologist pretending to be an ignorant so he will get hired for low-budget jobs (yes, him having a degree in anthropology is actually making it harder for him to be hired), an archaeologist who supervises road work and, my personal favourite, an econmic professor who loses more than wins money at poker.

They're a bunch of disillusioned adults, well in their 40s, who were brilliant and were let down by their country's academia, that hires people based on political affiliation and recommendations rather than actual merits. All they're trying to do is better their pretty miserable lives and fuck the system that fucked them.

And that's just the premise of the first movie. It's a comedy, it's a mafia movie, it's a Shawshank Redemption parody, you got drugs, objectively badass villains, political humour, chases, jumping from moving trains, more and more wild characters adding up (all with their special academic field, you might as well create your OC based on your major). It's like if Guy Ritchie directed Breaking Bad but all of the characters were played by the male cast of The Office.

The third movie is one of the few movies that made me cry not at the end, but at the start. I don't even wanna spoil but there's a story of friendship and revenge for the ages. I could talk about it all day.

I want to be honest, these three movies aren't very politically correct- and I use the expression in a positive way. Sadly there are some stereotypes portrayed in the movies (the first especially), but I still think they're very valid products.

So please, please, even if it's not in English, give it a try. You won't regret it. Here's the link to watch it (there are subtitles in a lot of language on this site, not just english)

Here you got the trailer

And here is the way the movie starts, I translated it in English.

"In Italy, a drug to be defined as such must be registered in the list of illegal molecules of the Ministry of Health. Cocaine, heroin, amphetamines, methadone, ecstasy and roughly 200 other molecules are part of that list. If a molecule is not in that table then you can produce it, you can take it, but above all you can sell it. At 24 I graduated in neurobiology with honors, I have a master's degree in computational neuroscience and one in molecular dynamics. In recent months I have formed a gang that manages a turnover of hundreds of thousands of euros, I am accused of manufacturing and dealing in drugs, armed robbery, kidnapping and attempted murder. My name is Pietro Zinni... and I'm a university researcher."

[siriannatan]

Something, something vampire Chromia Scott ft. Weather Husbands

I had a request on AO3 for a vampire Scott fic so... I did this?

AO3

Scott was not having a good morning. And unlike most days it had nothing to do with other empires, his magical eye hurting for no reason or his duties as Chromia's ruler and main trade representative. No, his problem had to do with a sizeable secret he so far managed to keep from others. Not that all the new settlements were here that long. He himself barely had like three buildings done, including his own house and a barn - not the llama pens - and a storage building since nowhere else had room for the abundant building materials he needed.

His problem was to do with him being a vampire.

And I know what you're thinking. This colourful clown is a vampire, no way. Well, yes way. And it wasn't like Scott planned to be one or was overjoyed about it. It was an accident and all the blood he needed really clashed with his style. And don't get him started on the whole sun thing. Well, at least that one could be solved with a rather simple potion and blood cravings with some animal blood - as gross as that was...

What exactly was his problem? Well, with how busy he was he forgot to eat and refill his sun protection stash. And he noticed that after waking up when the sun was u and ready to kill him the moment he left his house. He could hold until the sun has set. It'd just be very messy. And damn painful too but he'd be fine. As long as no one decided they needed dyes and came looking for him.

There was one little thing he forgot - the local archaeologist and his complete lack of time awareness or schedule and how forgetful he was about anything that's not at least a hundred years old. Like announcing he was intending to visit someone to archive their progress so far. Oh. And he knew Scott from before the whole settlement thing and even the vampire thing. At least he was pretty to look at.

And, as Scott's lately terrible luck would have it, Pix chose today of all days to show up with his fancy notebook and quill to take his little neat notes. How disgustingly adorable...

"Scott?! You home?!" Pix called out from outside and Scott could not help a little whimper that escaped him. Why today... "I was in the area and thought I could archive Chromia's progress!?" the archaeologist kept calling out. He likely assumed Scott was just ignoring him like he often did.

*Knock, knock* "Scott? Come on... just a few minutes and I'm gone?"

Who like who but Scott knew how stubborn and childish Pix could actually be. There was no way he was leaving without getting some sort of response so Scott forced one out. "Go home, I'm sick," he yelled and broke into probably his best-ever round of fake coughing.

But no matter how good his coughing was it had the exact opposite reaction. "Oh no. Do you need help with anything? I can water your flowers and feed the animals..."

"Just leave me be..." Scott whined. He was so close to giving in to his damn instincts and jumping Pix to drain most if not all his blood... "Please..." he added and if he could he'd probably blush from shame. 

Pix had none of it. "I'm sorry Scott, but I'm not about to leave a sick person to themselves. Now..." the archaeologist said far too kindly, considering their relationship so far was nothing but nice, and climbed the ladder to Scott's loft. "What can I help you with?" he asked and Scott was less and less against just killing him. 

"Nothing, go away," Scott huffed, burrowing further into his bedding. He was far too hungry for this. "NO?!" he screamed when Pix approached a covered with thick fabric window. "Don't you dare uncover any of these windows... I need it to be dark to sleep..."

"Okay... Are you sure you'll be okay if I leave your eyes are weird..."

Scott almost cursed out loud. He forgot about that damn side effect. Being hungry made his normal eye freakishly red and black and his magic eye glowed for no good reason. "I... I have no..." Pix was not going to be convinced he was seeing things. And Scott had no good excuse as to why he looked like a corpse, which he did without his potion. "You tell anyone about this and you're dead... I'm a vampire Pix, and I might have missed some things I should have done so leave while I still control myself..." Scott warned, trying to look as scary as he could while half-starved. 

"A... a vampire? But you don't look like one," Pix hummed instead of leaving Scott alone.

"I'm not changing my whole aesthetic because of one small accident, and I have it all figured out so... Go back to your ruin," Scott growled baring his fangs. If asking didn't work maybe...

No, being scary was a fail and now there was a Pix on his bed. Far, far too close to Scott. Inspecting his teeth. "Fascinating," he hummed keeping Scott's mouth open. 

"Stop it," Scott barked pushing Pix away but miscalculated and ended up on top of him. "Don't just shove your hands onto people's mouths," he grumbled and realised something terrible. He maybe cut one of Pix's fingers with his fangs. It was bad. Very bad.

In one quick move, Scott was as far from Pix as his small house allowed. Fighting the instinct to just bite the man and staring straight ahead with wide eyes.

"Is that what's wrong? You're hungry?" Pix asked, slowly sitting up, instead of fleeing as he should have. "Oh, Scott. You should have said so," Pix sighed and to Scott's shock opened two more buttons of his shirt than he usually did. "Assuming you can... like not kill me, you can have some of my blood?"

Pix's offer sounded more like a question than anything but Scott was far too tempted by it to care all that much. Or how much he was in control of himself. "You would?" he asked but was already slowly closing the distance to where Pix was sitting at the edge of his bed. Looking at Scott with at all not hidden curiosity. 

"Yes, you're obviously not feeling well and..."

"You talk too much..." Scott grumbled poking his face into Pix's exposed even more than the usual neck. "Are you completely sure you're okay with me biting you?"

Pix barely breathed out a quiet 'yes' before Scott's fangs broke tan skin with ease and Scott's senses focused on only one thing. Blood. First human blood he's ever had. So sweet so rich. How was he supposed to come back to his usual diet after this? "Scott..." Pix's groan had Scott jumping back as all senses flooded back to his brain once the immediate hunger was satisfied. And Scott was horrified with himself.

He's never bitten a person before and now Pix was on his bed. Panting heavily. His shirt missing several buttons from Scott pulling at it to move the man into a more comfortable position. Not necessarily as comfortable for Pix as for Scott's hungry self. And the archaeologist was just catching up to the fact that Scott was no longer pushing him into the bed and biting him.

"Why did you stop?" he asked and tried to sit up and almost immediately fell back down. It didn't make Scott feel any better.

"Why in... Why would you let a starved vampire bite you, you idiot!" Scott huffed and jumped into making sure Pix would not die from blood loss. "I was obviously not in a fit state to propose that to. If you ever see me like that again, leave. Run back to your dusty ruin," he complained as he helped Pix sit up. At least no more blood was leaving through the neat puncture marks Scott's fangs left. 

"But it felt nice..." Pix mumbled but did not move at all.

Scott sighed. "It's supposed to, so the victim doesn't struggle, you idiot," Scott huffed and lightly punched him. "You're having a nap now, no complaining." 

"Only if you join me," Pix yawned. Losing blood was shockingly tiring. 

Scott huffed and complained some more and first insisted Pix have some water but after that, he gave up and joined the archaeologist for a nap.

[carbondated]

KNOWN ALIASES, PART ONE:

Over the years, River has taken up many new aliases out of necessity, Sister Cantica, Miss Spritz, River Allegro. The list is as endless as it is frankly, obvious, which serves the dual purpose of being easy to remember and, a private joke she can enjoy. Of the many, many names, there are four that she finds herself coming back to over the years. Though these particular aliases were active for a long period of time, it does not mean that she lived linearly. Rather she would keep careful note of when it was safe to jump back and forwards between her own time-stream.

The following are two such names:

MELODY MALONE: verse; Manhattan's Angel ( arc: Heaven, help me now, Heaven, show the way )

Name meaning: Melody, Modern English derived from the Greek Melodia. Malone  is an Irish surname. From the Irish "Mael Eóin", the name means a servant or a disciple of Saint John. Occupation: Private Investigator /occasional author. Qualifications: P.I License Time zone: New York 1936-50. Nationality: British. cosmopolitan Fictional Biography: Melody Malone was born at an undisclosed time in an undisclosed place in the year [redacted.] Of what little is known about Melody, it is rumoured she has a famous archaeologist for a twin sister. (PROSE: The Ruby's Curse ) As a PI Melody chooses to focus on more obscure cases, the stranger, the better. ( PROSE: The Angel's Kiss ) She vanished quite as suddenly as she had appeared in on new years eve 1950 in the middle of a party, simply walking out into the street and never reappearing. Her personal things were retrieved from her flat in Manhattan and forwarded to a couple named Williams, believed to be distant relatives of hers.

MELODIE WILLIAMS verse; la belle dame sans merci ( arc: I would lie awake and pray you don't lie awake for me )

Name Meaning: The name Melodie is primarily of French origin that means Song, Melody. Williams, she named herself after her father's surname. Occupation: Professor Of Archaeology, specialising in pre-history. Qualifications: Doctorate in Archaeology, from the Sorbonne. Time Zone: Everywhere on Earth 1950-1980. Nationality: French. Fictional Biography: Melodie was born to a normal family with a dog and a large backyard just outside Bordeaux. She loved to dig up old coins in the yard alongside her pet dog, which lead to her passion to become an archaeologist, or so she tells people whenever they ask. For reasons unknown to most, she sometimes assists certain organisations requiring information on prehistoric finds of an alien nature. This agreement has meant travelling pretty much all of the world at someone else's expense, which suits her just fine. Despite being French, she sounds oddly British, which she attributes to being sent away to a London boarding school when she was younger. Melodie owns a house in Marseille and another small flat in Paris, though she is reluctant to explain just how she affords them. Just Like Ms Malone, Professor Melodie Williams disappeared quite suddenly as well in 1980 on an unnamed digsite. Witnesses claim she literally vanished in a puff of smoke.

[omega-floweys]

more rambles MORE RAMBLES . i have been prompted to talk more about my guys . smiles .

so like GENERALLY. flowerguys live pretty similarly to us. they work regular jobs they get crushed under the horrible reality of capitalism.

complete side tangent but unfortunately i cannot Not make this a capitalist society because i am not economist andy i would not be able to portray anything else in a way that feels accurate because i Just Don't Know What That Would Look Like. things are a bit better than real world capitalism though. discrimination is just not really a thing either generally or in the workplace because there is nothing to really discriminate against. there is likely some level of lack of accommodation for disabled people but i am not dipping into adding like a flower equivalent to racism or anything because it would feel weird and unnecessary and it is not my place to elaborate on.

SIDE TANGENT OVER. OK. where was i.

generally a lot of communication in tone etc is done through tail+hand gestures. it is a big part of how they communicate and get across things like sarcasm etc. i was also considering a sort of greeting where two people wrap their tails together to gauge what kind of person they are and whether or not they'd really get along. this greeting is likely not done very often in professional settings and if it is, it's very brief and doesn't tend to really reflect on either person like it would normally.

AND THIS ALSO BRINGS ME TOOOOO...

V and raz are very explicitly autistic and for that reason are PERFECT EXAMPLES here to elaborate on how it ties into these gestures.

raz simply does not do these gestures. his tail will typically passively sway around without any sort of intent. he does not emote in general and does not emote through hand or tail gestures. it makes it even harder for others to know what he's thinking or what his intentions are.

V, on the other hand, has learned to replicate these gestures. he has a terrible time doing them though he HATES it he hates socialising in general. he tends to get things "right" but will mess up on occasion and get looked at weird and it makes him want to explode.

there are definitely likely other ways for these gestures to tie into being autistic but V and raz in particular are very good opposing examples.

jumping topics again. this is the last bit i swear.

the general opinion someone typically has on the previous civilization is really how you'd think about any previous human civilization. with distant curiosity, unless you are actively interested in the topic. when discoveries are made the message gets out pretty quickly and there is a large effort from... tech-archaeologists? i don't know what term to use here. to archive the information they do have in ways that are easier to preserve. there's a pretty decent amount that they know about who these people were and how they functioned, but unfortunately enough they have not found any images or record of exactly WHAT they were, so there is an additional effort to find any physical remnants of this society. it IS, ultimately, a background part of the story but is kind of important context in various religious and spiritual beliefs that i do want to elaborate on at some point just due to their unbelievably close proximity to how this former society lived.

[livwritesfics]

𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐈 𝐑𝐀𝐍 (𝐈 𝐑𝐀𝐍 𝐒𝐎 𝐅𝐀𝐑 𝐀𝐖𝐀𝐘)

𝟏𝟎 𝐃𝐀𝐘𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐋𝐀𝐖𝐋𝐔 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 - 𝐋𝐢𝐯 ☆ - Wattpad

You can read on either my ao3 or my wattpad! Also posted down below!

Law realized he had feelings for Luffy when he met him at Punk Hazard. This boy that he met... There was something about him that made Law's heart go thump, thump, thump.

I never thought I'd meet a boy like you,

The way Luffy would just jump into trouble just like that annoyed him to no end. However, Law didn't have it in his heart to get mad at him. He just couldn't! And even if he did, he couldn't stay mad at him forever. Whenever he wanted to stay mad, that face just automatically made him smile all over again. His smile, his eyes.

The kind of eyes that hypnotize me through, hypnotize me through.

Law knew that if he wanted to be in an alliance with him he shouldn't get attached. But Luffy was like a drug. He always wanted to be around him. Having Luffy's beautiful eyes on him and only him. But, he knew from experience that he shouldn't. All the people he knew and loved disappeared just like that. And just like that he was alone all over again. Law knew he couldn't feel that all over again. It would tear him apart.

And I ran, I ran so far away.

But no matter how much Law tried to separate himself from Luffy, he. Just. Couldn't. Get. Away. His feelings would grow stronger. So strong that he would blush at everything he did. This boy had so much of an effect on him. He wanted more.

I couldn't get away.

This entire thing was stressing Law out. He wanted to see if he could ask Luffy's archaeologist, Robin, for help but... He couldn't. It would be so embarrassing.

Eventually his feelings grew so out of control that he went one day to the library on the Sunny, to ask her for advice.

He knocked on the library door, trying to seem a little confident. Robin looked up from her book and motioned for him to come in.

"Law-kun, what brings you to the library?" She put a bookmark in her book and closed it.

Law scratched the back of his head trying to form the question he's been asking himself for weeks now. Robin, patient as ever, waited for him.

He was fussing so much over this that he groaned and put his head in his hands.

"I... I don't know what I should do." He said quietly. He leaned back into the chair and finger-combed his hair. "I really just don't... know anymore."

Robin grinned knowingly and put her head on her hand, "Is this about my captain?"

Law leaned forward and looked at her. She knows. Law nodded slowly.

"I see. What does your head tell you to do?"

Law looked at her confused. "What do you mean?"

"What do you think you should do?"

He thought for a moment. That's easy. He thinks he shouldn't be with him because... he could loose him in battle against Doflamingo. They were on their way to Dressrosa.

"My head... tells me that I shouldn't be with him. And that this alliance should be strictly professional." The words tasted horrible on his tongue. He wanted to gag.

"Mhm." Robin pondered his response. "And what about your heart? What does your heart want?"

All of a sudden Law pictured Luffy. And how much he loves to be around him. He wants him. He wants him so much.

"I want him." Law blurted out without hesitation. Law slapped a hand over his mouth and ducked his head in embarrassment as Robin laughed.

"Well, there you go."

Law immediately knew now. It doesn't matter anymore. He wants him. He needs him. He finally got his answer. He stood up abruptly and ran out of the library thanking Robin.

He went to the place he knew Luffy would be at: Sunny figurehead

Almost as if Luffy could sense that he was coming to him, he jumped off of the figurehead and stood in front of Law looking up at him. Law gasped at the beauty of him and blushed.

A beam of light comes shining down on you, shining down on you.

"I figure you want to tell me something, Torao?" He raised an eyebrow willfully.

Law took a deep breath. And instead of saying any words.... he kissed him. Right on the lips in front of everyone. Luffy gaped but melted right into the kiss.

Reached out a hand to touch your face,

Luffy wrapped his arms around Law's neck and stood on his tippie-toes. In result Law moaned into the kiss and smiled. This felt right. This felt so right.

When the kiss ended, They both smiled and giggled like idiots.

"I made this," Law laughed again, "so hard for myself. All I had to do was just go for it."

Luffy played with Law's baby hairs on the back of his head, "I was waiting for you! You took so long! I should've just made the first move myself."

Their foreheads touched and he sighed. Yes, he was scared of loosing Luffy, and loose another person he held so dear to his heart. But, Luffy makes him happy. Luffy was home.

He came home. He loves this man.

"Well, I'm sorry I made you wait. How 'bout I make it up to you." Law chuckled and smirked.

And so, they went to the Captain's Quarters. And were there for a long time.

@lawluevents

[butterfluffy]

hii!! is it alright if i request a fluff scenario with Robin with a gn reader where they got lost while exploring the woods. (you don’t have to write this if you don’t feel like it!!) thank you have a great day<3 !!

“lost in you”

⠀⠀ੈ♡˳· oh no! you are lost in the woods while exploring... with robin, who's lost in you instead.

⠀⠀➧ fluff | nico robin × gn!reader | oneshot/scenario

⠀⠀➧ warnings — none! mistakes may be present, though.. so do ignore them, thanks!

⠀⠀➧ requests are open! do send some requests for me to write!

⠀⠀꒰ 🍨 ꒱ YES YES YESSSS!! SOMEONE FINALLY REQUESTED FOR MY WIFE! 😭💗💗💗 (btw, this is before time skip, i hope you don't mind..!)

“Okay, so Zoro, you keep watch of Merry and don't go wander around, or you'll get lost!” Nami says to the swordsman who only yawned, shooing her away as he turned to his side to sleep.

“Yeah, I got it. You can all go now, I'm going to sleep..” He grumbles, stretching his arms before closing his eyes to sleep in a snap, causing Nami to sigh with a frown.

“Tch, this guy, really...! Oh well, Sanji-kun, let's go. I'll be drawing this island on my map.” Shaking her head, Nami then called Sanji who followed her with heart eyes.

“Yes Nami-swaaannn~! Ah, Robin-chan, Y/n, take care on your exploration in this island, okay?” The cook reminds as you and Robin nodded with a smile, seeing them off.

“Okay, Robin, Y/n, we'll be going now too! Bye bye!” Bidding their good-byes, Usopp then followed Luffy who jumped around like a child with Chopper, excited to look around—when they were tasked to collect materials..

“Alright, so Robin, shall we go?” You asked the raven-haired woman who nodded with a smile, “Mhm. Let's go.”

Walking behind you, Robin had her hand placed on your back, gently caressing it each moment given—following your tracks to the unfamiliar forest for an adventure..

“Robin, look, a flower..!” You chirped, showing Robin the flower you've found, a faint blush visible on your face.

“Oh, what a pretty flower, Y/n. Just like you, mhm?” She says with a smile, complimenting you with the flower—her words causing you to blush harder..

“..A..Ah, tha.. Thank you, Robin...” You muttered, looking down to hide your face from the woman who hummed, picking the flower up and then sweeping your hair behind your ear. Placing the flower on it, smiling at you.

“Hehe, so I was right..” Robin blurts out, confusing you. “What do you mean, Robin?” Brushing a finger on your cheek, the archeologist replied,

“You do look prettier with it.”

Hearing Robin's flustering words, you then blew a fuse, stammering a thanks to her as you touched the flower she placed on your ear.. “T..T...Thanks!”

“Mhm.. By the way, that flower is deadly, Y/n, dear.” Robin stated, her morbid self popping out... “G-GEH!? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME SOONER, ROBIN..!?”

Immediately trying to get the flower off, Robin stopped you. “Shh, Y/n. Calm down, the flower is poisonous—meaning that it will only cause death when eaten.”

Calming you down, Robing then lets out a chuckle from your fussing. Taking your hand and walking with you in the large land where..

“Robin?” You called, tugging on the archaeologist who was checking a plant out, your action catching her attention.

“Yes?” She hums, blue eyes staring at yours with adoration as you bit the innards of your cheeks. “I just noticed, we've been walking around for some time now and...”

“Where the hell are we..?” Asking the tall woman where you two are at, Robin's mouth fell agape, looking around, realizing that—

“Oh my, we're lost.” She deadpans, looking calm as ever as you slowly sunk to panic.. “What do we do, Robin? We lost track of Merry, and the crew too..”

Planting a kiss on your forehead as she ran her fingers to your hair, Robin then whispered assuring words to you, calming you down.

“Don't be in such panic, Y/n. We'll go back to them later, for now, let's take a small rest mhm?”

Taking deep breaths to calm down, you then sat on the rock behind you as Robin leaned on a tree, taking a rest after all the walking you two did.

“This island is quite big, no wonder we got lost..” You uttered, chuckling from the misfortune you and Robin are at.

“Yeah, I hope no monsters come and eat us.” 'Jokes' Robin, scaring you slightly.. “Robin, can you please not..?”

“Hehe, sorry...~” She cooes, watching you lean your head on the tree beside the rock you're sitting on, letting a snicker out...

She's got her eyes on you. She's watching you. Her beautiful blue eyes staring deeply at your resting figure that she finds cute, a soft smile forming in her face by the small huffs you take from tiredness..

Examining your every feature discreetly, Robin hums, loving the way your eyes flutter like a butterfly—just adoring every bit of you.

Robin feels lucky, even though you two are lost right now, because you're with her. The one that she loves is with her.

“—bin? Robiiinnn? Robin, hey~?” You called, repeating her name as you snapped your fingers, finally catching her attention.

“Ah, yes, Y/n?”

“It's getting kinda late now, let's go?” You asked, standing up from your position as Robin nod her head, tugging her cowboy hat down to cover the embarrassment on her face from being lost in you.

“Anyway...” Eyes roaming the vast forest, you then nervously laughed. “How do we found our way out of this maze of a forest?”

Raising her brows, the archeologist sent you a wink.

“Don't worry, I've got this.” Posing to use her hana hana no mi powers, Robin then used her ability, “Ojos fleur!”

Sprouting multiple eyes around the forest, Robind was quick to locate Going Merry and the rest of the crew.. “Mhm, I found them. Let's go now, Y/n.”

Entwining her hand with yours, you and Robin finally left the woods after being lost, returning to the crew....

© butterfluffy 2022

[v3joker]

[Game of Dice] Joker Skills

*Originally made to post to my YouTube community as each week I put something about Game of Dice there. This is also posted here, to Tumblr, to archive it.

Almost every Joker character (character with a hidden skill) has their skill based on an existing skill. Some just exist on that Joker skill, not as a regular skill. I usually explain new Jokers' skills by saying the name of the existing skill rather than explain what the skill does, since it's easier to say the name of the skill. :)

Anyway here's a list of all the Jokers with what skill it's based on cause I love having random knowledge for this game. Even the ones not based on skills.

[~☆~]

Ion

Phantom (Puppet/Chaotic City): Big Fish

Prince (Prince's Dignity/Insight): Color Finale

Mary

Wintry (Heaven's Blessings): Celebrity's Visit

Phantom Thief (Phantom Thief's Trick/Phantom Thief's Fancy Trick): no exact skill, but could be based on Knife in the Dark without JOY steal

Halloween (Candy/Halloween Magic): Smashing

Deadly Bunny (This Way, Please/Your Table is Ready): Exceptional Choice

Black Rose

Wintry (Speed UP/Can't Follow Me): High Jump

Card Queen (Greetings from a Magic Cat): Birthday Party

Bosun (Oppress/Overwhelm): n/a

Tora (& Tori)

Onmyouji (Onmyodo: Confuse/Exhaustion): Shiver Me Timbers!

Rudolph (Surprise Entry/Gift): Home for Newlyweds

Rica

Rockstar (Rica's Dimension Shift/Rica's Teleport): Dimension Shift

Goddess of Love (Love Melody/Serenade): Yikes! Crocodile, but upgraded

Raven

Beast (True/Forever Love): Skydive, w/ double summon

Lynnway

Baseball Girl (Swing/Full Swing): Nano Warp Machine

Stella

Cosmic Girl (Space Travel/Exploration): Strange Pipette, w/ summon

Rabbit Hacker (Keylogger/Dropper): Gotcha!

Doria

Undercover (Emergency Custody/Violent Criminal Arrested): Mirror Mirror

Sharon

Mechanic (Sharon's Calculation/Victory Formula): Let's Count (Hello Kitty collab skill)

Archaeologist (Relic Thief/Power): Interception

Sophia

Unicorn (Unicorn Gravitation/Magic): Retribution Reverse

Isabelle

Noble (Isabelle's Day/Isabelle's Special Day): Come Over Here

Gothic (Ghostly Greetings/Touch): Touch of Succubus

Sailor (Sympathy/Special Sympathy): Song of Mermaid

Anthony

Queen of Hearts (Heart Beam/Queen's Heart Beam): Critical Hit, w/ summon

Space Pirate: no exact skill but could be based on Strange Pipette and/or Home Run

Kai

Guardian (Judgement/Divine Judgement): Gravity Field

Honor Student (Wisdom/Experience Drain): Life Drain

Demon (Skill/Power Drain): n/a

Lucy

9-Tailed (Ready to Feed On/Bon Appetit): Invisible Hand, w/ Stop!

Mouse King Lucy (Building Mouse Village/Kingdom): Spartan Training

Prince

Mad Hatter (Teatime/Sweet Teatime): Divine Protection

Delinquent (Focus/Man-to-Man Block): Spotlight

Liz

Cheer Leader (Lucky Cheering): Master Navigator

Tomboy (Full/Pinpoint Dash): Hidden Quest

Alice

Hong Kong (Awakened Alice!): Symbol of Wealth

Hong Kong II (Happy/Sweet Snack Time): Counterattack

Beautiful (Splendid/Shining Beauty): Don't Stand in Front

Ling Ling

Goal Keeper (Nothing get pass me/Nothing can pass me): Knife in the Dark

Sky Warrior (Warrior Stance/Victory Pose): Excellent Choice

Magical Girl (Magical Awakening/True Power of Magic): Critical Magic Show

Dr. X

Original (Gravity UP): Yikes! Crocodile!

Lightning God (God's Wrath/Punishment): n/a

Captain (Rear/Surrounding Pursuit): Mischief of Spirits

Refia

Original (Counterattack): Counterattack, w/ can't takeover

Detained (Mental Interference/Control): No Escape

Soldier (Doll Escort/Protection): Music Start

Kaito

Original (Rapid Growth/Data Manipulation): Rapid Growth, w/ can't takeover (whole game installation)

Darkened (Spreading Darkness/Crawling Chaos): Broken Brake

Yuki

Original (Ninjutsu: Slow/Onmyodo: Blizzard): Slow

Yukata (Take This/Taste This): Switch, w/ Steal Prop *Blizzard is supposed to have Ninjutsu as the prefix, but it has never been fixed. So it has Onmyodo like Onmyouji Tora

Heidi

Original (Climax/Encore): Leave it to Fate (Climax), targets up to 3 cities at higher grades

Fairy Queen (Blooming Dream/Dream in Full Bloom): Christmas Miracle

Reapercy

Original (Checkmate/Golden Checkmate): Curse (Checkmate), Girl Crush

Pool Party (Come on In/Come Here): n/a

Devil Reapercy (Rogue/Outlaw): Solitude

Gray

Original (City Shooter/Sniper): Steal Prop, w/ summon

Space Police (Police Officer/Investigator): Every Inspiration

Howl

Original (Wolf Summon/Big Game Hunting): Retribution

Puppeteer (Trap Hole/Endless Trap Hole): Maelstrom

Fia

Original (Fan Meeting): Doll Fishing

Sea Fairy (Let's Play/Have Fun in the Water!): Domino

Magical Girl (Magical Refraction/Reflection): Time Rewind, no Panda installation

Fairy Dancer (Fairy Dance/Eye Catching Fairy Dance): The Solitude of Glamor

Ren

Original (Meditation/P.T): Power Up!

Magic Cat (Spell of Destruction/Apocalypse): Ch.1 Renaissance/Ch. 2 Destruction

Rosé

Original (Sharp/Harsh Lash): Charming Rainbow

Devil (Bewitch/Beckon): Charming Rainbow, but upgraded

Sun Knight (Sword of Victory/Sword of Promised Victory): n/a

Rina

Original (Joyful/Blessed March): Speedster

Angel (Song/Blessing of Angel): Color Sync

Moon Archer (Piercing Arrow/Mirage Piercing Arrow): Curse of Clown

Ballet (Attitude/Arabesque): Poisoned

Yura

Original (Butterfly Dance/Blue Butterfly Dance): Push

Christmas (Yura's Gift/Sincerity): Sweet Trap

Gothic (Flutter/Crystal Light Butterfly): Psychokinesis

Pierre

Original (i love cakes/I love anything sweet): Charming Bubble

Winter Festival (Baker's/Pierre's Gift): Santa's Gift

Agent (Good Will/Samaritan): Give and Take

Violet

Original (I Got You!/Don't Move!): Girl Crush

Seaside (Hydro Pump/Cannon): Self-Defense

Saint (Authority/Splendor): Girl Crush, but it also decreases character & dice abilities (Energy Drink [Goods])

Scarlett

Original (Locating the Target/Target Located): Come With Me

Seaside (Hang out with me!/Let's play!): Thief Target Area

Witch Trainee (Scary Prank/Dangerous Prank): Signal

Leo

Original (Secret in the Hoodie/Weapon in the Hoodie): Hexcraft

Young Master (Young Master's Mischief/Weapon): Demon Invasion

Villain (Breakdown/Wide Breakdown): Ocean Party

Fairy Knight (Impressive/Flashy Swordsmanship): Event for You

Kara

Original (Warning Shot/Suppressive Fire): The Art of Theft

Great Witch (Magic Concentration/Discharge): First Place Dash

Hera

Original (Black Hole/Super Black Hole): Besiege

Circus Master (Continuing Show/Express Night): Double Trap

Sora

Original (Hero Power/Just Power): Guardian of Justice

Dreamman

Original (Give me strength!): Symbol of Wealth

[pashminalamb]

Breaking Mirrors is such a wonderful fic!!! Made me think that before Nagi, Aiku, and Rin had a relationship with reader-chan, the three of them made the first move and confessed their feelings for low self-esteem reader ;;;;

And then, reader-chan's thoughts want to be dense and will be like: 'W-wha--?? A-are you sure??? This has to be a joke. Yea! It is, they're probablyyyy doing this for them to test how their confession will be like towards their crush. Yea.'

However, those searing eyes of theirs tell otherwise and decided to act bold (⁄ ⁄•⁄-⁄•⁄ ⁄)

Nagi doesn't even bat an eye towards body image. If he goes into details about how something should look, you'd spend hours with him at the furniture store just to look for a perfect bed frame (the way i wheezed at that thought); this man is dead serious about his sleep schedule and won't hesitate to get into the technicalities about the kind of mattress the both of you should get (cue jumping on the mattress in the shop and him dragging you on top it) or the games that the both of you should play- and that's the parameters of your relationship.

Oliver? He finds you interesting; like i mentioned in the fic, reader is mentioned to see old ruins and know history facts- consider her as archaeologist and this guy is a nerd. so in short, he will gladly listen to the history of the renaissance as a bedtime story, and this is one relationship where he would speak the most.

Rin... he's gonna argue it was coincidence but it has to be a shared taste in horror movies. He likes having an arm around you on movie nights, point it out and you'll lose that 'privilege'.

These guys don't care abt body image. (esp aiku's case cause that one manga panel where he was younger and wanted to be a striker- his dream dying when he told his coach that he would like any other player and marry a 'big screen model' if i quoted it correctly- but he likes archaeology <3)

[soggykookiesandcream]

𝐵𝒶𝒸𝓀 𝐹𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝒟𝑒𝒶𝓉𝒽 - 𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓅𝓉𝑒𝓇 𝐼𝐼𝐼

"Wow noona," Jungkook said, "What does it say?"

"I don't know yet Kookie," I laughed.

"When will you know?" He asked munching on snacks.

"Soon." I smiled.

Jungkook was my cousin. He's still in school and was very interested in archaeology. And since I was his only source of inspiration, he'd always call me to ask about my newly gained knowledge and information. I had returned to the centre with the pictures and information we had collected. I was now in a video call with Jungkook and talking to him about the pyramid.

"Cool," he said licking his fingers, "call me when you've found out and tell me."

"Okay, Kookie," I smiled and hung up.

I sigh and fall back onto the couch. Tomorrow we would be attempting our first time at decrypted the inscriptions on the pyramid wall. I was nervous again. I had no idea why but I always seemed to be nervous when I thought about that pyramid. God, why did you find out about it?

●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○

I was now in the computer lab at the centre with my team with several layers of books, papers and files sprawled across the table. I was watching Namjoon carefully zooming into the picturing and noting down whatever he noticed. Jin was reading through a file and Hoseok was talking to a bunch of other archaeologists and drawing something trying to figure out what could be the tunnel system inside the pyramid according to their scanned images of the structure of the pyramid.

And me...

I was sitting there nervously biting my lips being useless.

I sigh in frustration.

"Namjoon, let me help you," I say.

"Fine," Namjoon agrees, "Note down what I say or show."

I try to work diligently along with Namjoon.

But I ended up being shooed away because I was messing up. I gave up and just sat on the couch in the room with my eyes closed. My legs were jumping up and down and my lip was almost on the verge of bleeding.

"Don't bite them, dear," he said, "you're making me want to do the same."

I chuckled, "Stop being so cheesy."

"Never," I'll be everything for you he thought, "I will never stop showering you with my cheesy comments if I can see you blush and be happy."

"Gosh," I looked away from him blushing, "I can't anymore. Bye."

Taehyung chuckled as he saw me turn around and hide my face.

"No, dear. Don't hide your face from me. You're beautiful. I love you so much." 

"But Tae..." I started shyly.

"What my dear?" He encouraged.

"I," I try to form the words, "I feel useless."

"What!" He almost screamed, "Useless? How are you useless?"

"I don't know..." I sigh, "you always bring me to places, buy me gifts and do so much for me... but I... I am unable to do anything for you."

"No," Taehyung started, "my dear, you are not useless. How can you be useless when you're the only thing that makes me feel alive and makes me want to tackle another day? I wake up every day for you. Don't say that."

With that, he pulls me into a hug and kisses my hair. 

"I love you," I mumble.

"I love you too."

"YUNA!"

"WHAT!? WHAT!?" I scream.

"We're working our asses off here and you're SLEEPING?" Jin screams.

"Oh god, I'm sorry. How long was I asleep?" I ask rubbing my eyes.

"As long as we took to decrypt," Jin said, his face evident with anger rising.

"You guys decrypted without me?" I ask.

"Yeah, because you were sleeping like a log." Jin hmphs.

"I am so sorry, Jin," I said sighing. I didn't know what was going on.

"Save your sorries," Jin spat, "come take a look at what we decrypted."

Sighing and ruffling my hair, I get up and go towards the table.

I take a look at the paper Jin handed me. 

"Here lies the lover of she, Waiting for her return, No one shall disturb thy soul Waiting for an innocent cause, Those disturbing shall coil in trouble For disturbing thy innocent soul He shall awaken, with her return."

I scoff, "Sounds like a person who was lovesick and was unable to protect his own wife and child."

"What?" I get a questioning look from Namjoon.

I cover my mouth. How did you know that?

"I," I tried to reason, "just guessed."

"Well," Hoseok says, "she sounds part right. 'Here lies the lover of she'. So lovesick that he wanted to be addressed as 'her' lover."

"He shall awaken with her return," Jin scoffed, "Looks like she never returned."

The room broke into laughter after hearing Jin. 

"Alright everyone," Jin claps his hands, "that's enough for today. Let's go and enjoy our discovery."

Everyone claps, gather their stuff and leaves... leaving Namjoon and me behind.

I keep staring at the piece of paper repeating the things written on it in my head.

"Yuna?" Namjoon asks.

I hum in response.

"You alright?" 

"Yeah of course," I reply peeling my eyes away from it and gathering my things, "Let's go, Namjoon."

●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○

Everyone was in the cafeteria to celebrate once before all this data was turned into a project report and sent away to the seniors for analysation. They were drinking, ordering food, etc. But I was definitely not in the mood. I just bought a plate of food and sat at a table looking at everyone enjoy. 

Meanwhile, in the pyramid,

"Dear,"

"W-what?" I stuttered.

918 words

[dredshirtroberts]

Having watched a lot of documentaries recently, I find myself forming Very Strong Opinions on presenters.

Perhaps it was growing up watching just an absurd amount of educational children's television in the mid-to-late 90s and early 00s. Perhaps it is that I enjoy learning and want to be able to enjoy enjoying learning. Perhaps it is that I am autistic and just have very strong opinions.

However, it is my Very Strong Belief that if your presenter - the person you have boots on the ground talking to real fucking people - is unpleasant you're allowed to replace them with someone more pleasant who is reading the facts.

Unpleasant and pleasant are inherently subjective terms but I mean them in a weirdly objective sort of way. Let me explain.

Your person who talks to other people in your documentary MUST WAIT FOR THE PERSON THEY'VE ASKED A QUESTION TO TO FINISH THE QUESTION. You can cut out the information you don't like in post. But you have requested a professional to explain to you a historical item and they haven't even used jargon yet, but you're already jumping in to make them get to the point faster and and YOU HAVE TO LET THEM FINISH SPEAKING FIRST, THEY ARE GETTING THERE, JUST FUCKING WAIT OLD MAN WHO REMINDS ME OF MY GRANDFATHER IN HIS EARLIER YEARS.

Perhaps I'm biased - a lot of my favorite types of documentaries are historical and much of that does tend to be Really Impressive Stock Footage of actors in reenactment gear and someone rambling facts over top, where professionals are unaccompanied by a Presenter when giving their information. I also prefer younger archaeologists (or presenters pretending to be archaeologists), though there is a trend i've noticed in the Older Documentary Presenter types that they do the Thing I Hate more than the younger types - even the younger ones who do The Thing I Hate are generally just really excited and it plays off better than "Impatient grumpy man who wants to make a point about his fringe theory". Mmm that's another factor to take into account I suppose.

I like the Bad Science documentaries sometimes. They posit neat ideas that are fun to think about in a science-fiction or fantasy sort of way - though they do leave out *so much information* about the actual work that's gone into like. The Stuff They're Showing.

I dunno, I just feel like the Really Enthusiastic Tour Guide of the historical location you're going to see is a way better documentary vibe than Grumpy Old Man with Racisms and Revisionist History.

(also if you can figure out what documentary series i'm referring to with the Grumpy Old Man (who is likely touting a racist idea) Who Doesn't Let People Speak, hi new bestie lets *grumble* together <3 )

(i'm so mad about it because his point was *cool* and might have some ground to stand on, but he was so *unpleasant* like no wonder no one in academia wanted to listen to his Completely Reasonable Actually theory.)

(i really want it to be Completely Reasonable Actually - it was very neat but i have a feeling all the rest of that after the first episode was going to devolve into *racism* and *aliens* again, and I just...wasn't putting myself through more than the pilot episode, he was just so *unpleasant*. and the poor people he talked to seemed so upset every time he interrupted their Very Clearly Prepared talking point they were very excited to talk about.)

[rockymthorrorshow]

you know, i've been thinking abt creative and artistic pursuits and like. Jobs and shit recently. (working a dead-end customer service job will do that do a gal.) and at the risk of doing my favorite thing, which is belaboring a metaphor, i've also been thinking abt reintroduction of wolves.

see, when they reintroduced wolves to yellowstone national park, it changed the course of the yellowstone river. that's the short version, anyway - the reality is a much longer process of ecological restoration that, for the most part, to my understanding, happened largely on its own. wolves reintroduced = better regulated deer and elk populations through natural predation = increased growth of wetland plants that high desert ungulates like to snack upon = better habitat for beavers and such/more robust plants to hold dirt in place in the face of water in transit = changed course of river. as someone who knows Fuck All about ecology or wildlife biology, i'm probably getting a bunch of that wrong, but it's fun to think abt. wolves changing the course of a river.

(stay with me here, this is the metaphor part.)

i don't think any human being on earth would ascribe such habitat changing effects to one single wolf. that would be silly! it was many wolves, over the course of a number of seasons, in conjunction with many other factors. it's not like the wolves set out to change the course of the river, or regulate the riparian habitat of yellowstone, or even manage the local elk population back to healthy levels. wolves were just Doing What They Do! goin about their days! and it terraformed a whole habitat!

i've wanted to write books since i was little. i'm also not very good at writing! i can string sentences together, i can even manage a pleasing turn of phrase or two, but when it comes to the structural elements that make a book enjoyable to read? pacing, plot structure, character motivation? to say nothing of themes? themes? fuck me, i'm terrible at it! but as i've explored a dozen different career options (archaeologist, paralegal, museum historian, etc.) it's the only thing i can see myself doing as a career in the long term. which, when you know you're not good at something, is a discouraging predicament to be in, let me tell you.

and when you tell people that you want to write books, they always jump to the new york times. "got a bestseller in the works, do you?" they ask, with a wide range of tones between earnest-if-blind-approval and asking-your-five-year-old-niece-if-she's-going-to-the-olympics. and like. not everyone can be a bestseller. for starters, there's a whole discussion about marketing and advance capital and the buy-in of the publishing industrial complex and corporate bookstores because let's face it, if you don't have amazon or b&n or both in your corner from the start it's an uphill slog, but there's also just. the reality of large numbers. only a few are going to hit that list. and that's okay.

as a public historian, you learn to think about the physical reality of archives. certain things get saved. others do not. whether that's because of conscious choices or limited space or the inherent frailty of material objects in the face of time (and don't think digital archives are immune from this, either), archives are more likely than not incomplete. this is especially true of historical publishing, particularly for genre fiction or niche audiences. old comic books get so expensive because they were, in some measure, disposable. same thing with pulp fiction and dime novels and penny dreadfuls and whatever the tiktoks of their day were called for the past three hundred years. even the Highest of Literature of a given era can vanish from view for a myriad of reasons. but behind each and every work that survived, and every work that didn't, there was a person who made that. multiple people, even - someone wrote the script and someone drew and inked the panels and someone colored the panels and a whole host of people brought that 10 cent comic book to a newsstand near your great-uncle Mike's childhood home. someone wrote the novel and someone set the type and someone bound the book that you found in one of those gloriously junky antique shops, tucked between a Better Homes and Gardens cookbook and the fifteenth Nancy Drew #14 that you've seen that day.

there's an inherent drive under capitalism that a company has to beat out the competition at whatever it does, to get in front of the consumer more than anyone else to the point where you have to buy whatever they're selling. and i'm not saying that as creators, marketing is bad. if you don't tell anyone about your stuff, they're never going to read it, and we do, ultimately, create art for the consumption of others just as much as for ourselves. we want people to comment on our fanfics, to keysmash in the tags of the art we post, to compliment the sweater we spent months knitting. we want someone to put our art on the fridge and say it's pretty. that's one of those silly things that makes us human.

but for me? i've found some comfort in the idea that wolves don't have a bestseller list. (see, there's the metaphor.) wolves don't have academy awards for the best elk takedown. they just do what they do, because it's a biological imperative. you don't have to write The Best Sci-Fi Novel Ever. you don't have to painstakingly hand-animate The Best Short Film Every Produced. the things you make can just be things. do your best, sure, but out of respect for yourself and your art form, not out of fear or envy of someone else's work.

i grew up with a saying in fan spaces that boiled down to "two cakes," referencing a cartoon where someone brought a cake to a buffet and found that someone had already brought a more elaborately decorated cake. the second panel is of a different person, looking with delight at the buffet, exclaiming, "holy shit! two cakes!" your work of art doesn't need to be so breathtakingly original and different and exquisitely crafted that it's impossible to create. (caveat: obviously, don't plagiarize someone else's work. it's rude, and you're cheating yourself out of the opportunity to make your own art.) but it's okay to just contribute to the ecosystem. not everything has to be the next Pride and Prejudice, or the next Legend of Zelda. make something that you enjoy, that speaks to the person you are now, in this moment, and share that with people.

your ecosystem will be better for you being there.

[culttvblog]

Armchair Thriller: Fear of God

Warning: suicide, cults

In my last post I commented that I don't think I have been completely fair to Armchair Thriller (1978 to 1980). The title places it in a great tradition, of course, of the long-running series Armchair Theatre and its successor Armchair Cinema. The difference, of course, is that Armchair Theatre drew on the older television tradition influenced by the actual theatre, of broadcasting a play in one go on one occasion, but Armchair Thriller's stories are all separated up into several episodes. Except when they're sewn together as TV films. I swear when I started blogging about old TV I had no idea how much like being an archaeologist it is, often like assembling the pieces of a pot and still not being sure about it, but I had better warn you that you will find the episodes of Armchair Thriller in several redactions online, and at least one series is also around in film form.

The other thing which fractures Armchair Thriller is that its episodes were made by two independent TV complanies, mostly by Thames Television, but two serials were made by Southern Television. As a result if you buy the DVD box set which describes itself as the complete series, it only includes the Thames serials and not the Southern ones. It's absolutely maddening, as so often in the world of old TV.

Fear of God has good snappy episode summaries on IMDb which I will try not to reproduce but I'm going to be absolutely frank here and say that I am sorry that I have so far managed not to see Fear of God because it contains all the things which virtually guarantee that I'm going to love it.

It starts with the classic intrepid-reporter-after-a-lead-that-everybody-wants-buried-including-the-police trope, which I already love. The reason is that a young woman has killed herself by jumping off the roof of the near-derelict building he lives in, and she has left a diary behind, of course. We have other threads in the shape of the condemned building which the reporter, Paul Marriott, is obviously keen to keep standing, and his recent divorce.

It turns out the woman belonged to what was then called a cult, and even if I wasn't already in love, my heart would have melted. I LOVE cults, or new religious movements as they were referred to when I was a young theology student in the nineties. SInce then both scholars and the public have gone back to calling them cults in distinction to more respectable religions. I'm hoping that one of these days the population notice that established, respectable religions also tend to function exactly the same as cults, just with the difference that the charismatic founder is dead, but that's another matter entirely. The cult in Fear of God is somewhat wooden without too much detail on its cultic workings, but that's OK because the serial is just getting started on the weird shit.

You could be forgiven for thinking that the first episode is perhaps a little slow and that this is going to be a straightforward mystery. However once the cult appears the show ramps up the pace and introduces a whole layer of science fiction, about sonic weapons used by the cult, which takes this one well out of standard mystery territory. From a pedestrian start as a mystery this show really throws all sorts of stuff at the viewer and even on my (currently) third viewing I'm still trying to get my head round it.

In fact this is much of the criticism of this episode online, that it isn't what it seems like it's going to be. This is a valid criticism, I think, and if it wasn't that the other stuff it introduces was so very me, I would probably agree. Perhaps a variation of this criticism could be that I think this four-part TV serial could in fact have been a film. In a film-length time I think the various elements could have been introduced at a different pace and avoid the feeling that it's changing tack part way through.

I spotted some dissatisfaction in the reviews with the way this complex plot is resolved: you will not be surprised to know that it's resolved by introducing something completely off the wall. I'm not going to tell you what it is because I don't want to spoil it, but suffice to say I roared with laughter at how it's done and wouldn't criticise the resolution personally.

I would praise the entire cast for excellent performances at some very intense and difficult roles. It is another peculiarity of the way the show develops that some quite key characters are only seen in one episode, so you don't get that much of some of these excellent performances. I would particularly single out Robert Austin depicting sheer fanaticism as the cult leader. This is something incredibly difficult to do without turning the leader into a one-dimensional caricature but he manages to do it for the approximately thirty seconds for which we see him. Another excellent performance is Peter Settelen as a drug addict who gets involved - again a very difficult role to do convincingly without caricaturing, but he makes the role a nuanced, insightful performance. With drug addiction, obviously. Settelen has appeared in many shows which are probably a bit later than what you will see here, but he is perhaps best known for having been Princess Diana's voice coach, so isn't just an actor.

My personal verdict is that this is one of those shows you watch for the journey rather than the map. If you require tight plotting and clear arcs through the mystery, I don't think this will be your sort of thing, and I think a lot of the perplexed reviews online are from people who really don't like this sort of show.

Fear of God is an excellent, layered thriller, although its far-ranging plot might not be pleasing to all.

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[codenamesailordarillium]

Oh, both mentions are terrible. So bad they might as well have ignored her like they did Martha (justice for Martha). 13 telling Yaz (YAZ) that she likes her even better than her wife, 15 grouping River in with Adric (ADRIC) as ‘people we’ve lost’ rather than with Sarah Jane and Rose as ‘people we’ve loved’. On balance, 13´s mention might be very very slightly better? At least it highlights the nature of that relationship. 15 might as well have said ‘Professor River Song, archaeologist, Luna University’ for all the personalisation in that mention lol.

Oh trust me, I am very much in agreement about both, my friend.

I was gonna hold off until actually watching the sea devils ep, but honestly might as well say it here that errything I've seen so far of the 13&Yaz "romance" seems to have been heavily shoehorned into Flux & the rest of 13's specials. Specifically, mentioning "her wife" seems to me kind of a half-assed shorthand of trying to make it seem like 13 reciprocates whatever feelings Yaz suddenly has for her without actually putting in the work to actually show it. Basically it's like: ooh yeah, Doctor have wife, Doctor love wife, we mention wife for purpose of showing Doctor love this person too! Which, while obviously heavily colored by the embittered shipper goggles I wear, still objectively isn't the most impactful way to communicate romantic feelings. If anything, the impression I had when I first saw gifsets of the infamous "even my wife" line read more as 13 awkwardly trying to let Yaz down easy seems like it'll probably hold.

And I mainly say it seems shoved into Flux because my honest impression of 13 & Yaz's interactions in the prior two seasons to overall not be much materially different than those 13 has with Graham or Ryan. Other than the scene in the Mary Shelley ep where she's talking to the girl involved with Byron and mentions that her "special person" is kinda different, there's nothing there that would've explicitly made me think Yaz had feelings for the Doctor (tho I'm sure some would strongly argue for her screaming at the end of Spyfall p.1 when Dhavvan!Master yeets 13 out of the plane).

As for 15, yeah, unfortunately Ncuti's delivery of the way he says her name does come off rather detached and so I'm struggling a bit with it. I'll be honest, I don't love all the promo that seems to be hinting that 15 could potentially end up having something going on with Ruby. Don't have a ton of hope there, honestly kinda worried Rusty's probably gonna recycle his "Penny" concept of the companion that was originally supposed to come after Martha that 10 was supposed to fall head over heels for.

Honestly, it's been a bit of a frustrating time as a River & Doctor/River fan. I'm not out here looking to hate on Chib or I guess Rusty at this point for no reason, but the continued erasure of River's character is demoralizing as time goes on. Especially when sentiment in overall DW fandom in the past seemed to have been that we should just get over her because her story was "done". DW tends to be a veritable parade of previous characters making their glorious returns all the time, yet for some reason wanting River back in that capacity is unacceptable, even tho technically speaking that was the whole intent of her character originally, knowing the Doctor throughout all their past & future faces.

I think I'm just rambling at this point, but there are a lot of repressed feelings regarding all this that I haven't deigned to express in the past because I try my best not to dwell on fandom shit that I know will inevitably upset me. I guess I've hit something of a breaking point, so sorry for using your ask as a jumping off point to let off this particular steaming kettle anon.

[lazymuse]

오늘은 쏟아지는 비를 맞으며... 9년 전 생일날 뉴욕에서 봤던 영화 <Love Is Strange>의 사운드트랙을 들었다. 그 영화의 사운드트랙은 죄다 쇼팽의 피아노곡 (거의 대부분 우리 회사 음��)... 빗방울 전주곡이 나오더니 몇 곡 뒤에 발라드 3번이 나왔다.

생각해 보니 7년 전 뉴욕 에어비앤비에서... 내가 지내던 방에 영창피아노가 있었는데; 당시 취미로 피아노 레슨을 좀 받고 있던 때라, 어차피 바쁜 관광을 하지 않는 나는 별다른 계획 없는 날엔 그냥 방에서 피아노 연습도 하곤 했었다. 그 때 이 곡을 레슨받고 있기도 했었는데... 지금은 못 치겠지만 그래도 그 때는 조금은 쳤었는데... 언제부터인가 이 곡 들을 때마다 그 때 생각이 난다.

집에 와서 생각난 또 다른 오래된 곡이 있다. Kelly Sweet의 Raincoat. 한때 이 여가수의 목소리가 좋아서 앨범도 찾아 듣곤 했는데, 언제부터인가 이름도 바꾸고 음악 스타일도 전혀 예상치 못한... 이상한(?) 걸 하고 있어서 안타깝다.

"You always pick the wrong women. What about Madeline, after me?" "Madeline was an archaeologist. She was, you know, she was fabulous." "Madeline was a nymphomaniac." "Okay, she had a little problem with fidelity, you know, and I didn't happen to see it."

As you can see we're not your typical family. This is the story of a year in our lives that we'll always remember. That's my mom. She's hard at work being soft on crime. "What we need are open prisons. European menus, decorating their own cells." My stepdad really didn't take it too well. "Wait a minute, excuse me. Steffi! Bring down a copy of my will and an eraser, okay?" That's my real dad. His love life definitely needs some help. "You know I'm gonna kill myself. I should go to Paris and jump off the Eiffel Tower. I'll be dead. In fact if I get the Concorde, I could be dead three hours earlier which would be perfect." ("She's perfect for you. She jogs every morning. You could go and bump into her and meet her.") I swear my family will do anything for love... "Oh, sorry." "Sorry." ... even sing… "Looking at you while troubles are fleeing I'm admiring the view..."

Miramax Films presents a comedy that sings and dances…

He's washing dishes and baby clothes… he’s so ambitious… he even sews. But don’t forget folks… That’s what you get, folks… For making whoopee.

Alan Alda, Woody Allen, Drew Barrymore, Lucas Haas, Goldie Hawn, Gabby Hoffman, Natasha Lyonne, Edward Norton, Natalie Portman, Julia Roberts, Tim Roth, David Ogden Stiers.

"Oh, don't forget to blow on her back between her shoulder blades. It makes her crazy." "Hey."

<Everyone Says I Love You>