#as always if you disagree that's perfectly fine just please be civil about it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sometimesiwritebadly · 4 years

Text

The One Where The Doctor Meets You (Ninth Doctor x Reader)

Summary: After saving London from the Autons, the Doctor is surprised when the TARDIS takes control and brings him to meet an old/new friend.

Warnings: None, I think. Unless you don’t like butterflies or butterfly-like creatures.

Notes: it’s the disappearing for months and then coming back with a part two that’s been finished in google docs for weeks, for me. (seriously though, sorry i disappeared for so long. i will post more often, i swear)

Word Count: 2.3k

The One Where You Meet The Doctor

Masterlist

The Doctor closed the doors to the TARDIS, watching with a sad smile as Rose stood on the other side. He’d liked her; despite everything he’s been through, he liked having a friend with him on his adventures again. But Rose had a life, and she’d chosen to stay. That’s fine, she’ll be safer that way. Live a short but happy life with Mickey and her mom. And he’ll continue getting himself into trouble, and doing his best to help people.

The Doctor moved towards the TARDIS console, and began piloting her to a new place. “Where should we go next? 18th century? 39th? How about the 52nd, we haven’t been there in a while…” As he began to pilot the ship, pulling at the controls he knows so well, the TARDIS seemed to disagree. She whirred in disapproval, then seemed to take the wheel herself, despite the Doctor’s movements. “Where are you taking me now?” The Doctor was confused, as he’d never seen the TARDIS act this way, but hey, she usually knows what’s best. So he followed her lead, and flew the TARDIS to where she’d wanted him to go. Eventually, the TARDIS’ wheezing stopped and they landed in the early 21st century, still on Earth. Curious and excited, the Doctor ran to the TARDIS doors and opened them, only to find himself standing on a seemingly normal street in the suburbs. He guessed it was the late 2020s, give or take a few years. Before he could get a better guess of where the TARDIS had taken him, a voice calling his name distracted him.

“Doctor? What’re you doing out here?” He turned to see a girl he’d never met before. She clearly knew him, as she pulled him into a hug, despite his arms being crossed over his body. “Must be early days for you, because I clearly remember telling you that you should park her in my living room.” The girl said as she pulled away from the hug. She ignored the confused look on his face and instead made her way into his TARDIS.

“What do you mean early days?” He asked. That’s probably not the first question he should’ve asked, but it was the one that intrigued him the most. He entered the TARDIS after her, closing the doors, and watched as she easily began flying her. “And who do you think you are to fly my TARDIS? How do you even know how to do that?” As he finished speaking, the TARDIS landed with an impressive lack of violent shaking.

The girl lightly laughed in response, before making her way out of the TARDIS into what the Doctor could only assume to be her living room. “Doctor c’mon, you know I can’t tell you how I know how to fly her. Spoilers, remember?” She paused for a moment once she was outside, waiting for the Doctor to follow her out. Once he did, reluctantly, She made her way into her kitchen, and she started grabbing things from various cupboards. “By the way, where’s Rose? I’ve never seen you with this face without her.”

“Rose? What - Who are you?” The girl finally stopped her actions, from the look of it, she was going to make a pot of tea, and looked up at the Doctor with wide eyes.

“Are you serious?” She said, just above a whisper. When the Doctor didn’t answer, she took a deep breath and looked away, collecting herself. The Doctor could’ve sworn she mumbled something under her breath as she did so, but when she looked up, a smile had been slapped onto her face. “Uh- sorry. I kinda forgot this would happen eventually. I’m Y/N. We’re, uh, friends. Or we will be one day.” At this point, she’d abandoned the tea all together, and made her way back over to the Doctor. She held a hand out for him to shake. “You see, we’re always meeting in the wrong order. That’s why I know you and you don’t know me.” The Doctor held out his hand as well, allowing her to shake it. He didn’t know what to think; on one hand, it’s amazing, but on the other, he thinks he should run for the hills. Knowing your own future is a dangerous game to play, and he doesn’t want anything to do with it.

“I should probably go then. I wouldn’t want to mess up the future.” He said, turning around and heading back into the TARDIS.

“What? No!” Y/N followed him in, closing the door behind her. “You’re not messing with the future by being with me!” She argued.

“Of course I am! You’ll end up telling me something about my future, and then it’ll be solidified. Unavoidable. A Fix-”

“I know how the future works, Doc. You’ve explained it to me hundreds of times.”

“See! Now I’ll have to explain it to you over and over, because you just told me that I did.”

“No, you explain it to me over and over because you like being the smartest person in the room.” The Doctor scoffed at her comment. Whoever this girl is to him, she’s not making the best first impression. “Scoff all you want, you know I’m right. That’s why you’re mad at me right now, because for the first time in forever you’re in a room with someone who knows more than you.” She leaned against the console towards him, a smirk on her face. The Doctor would never admit it, but she’s not entirely wrong.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” This only made Y/N laugh. He almost started laughing along with her when the TARDIS suddenly began moving. “What’re you doing?”

“I’m not doing anything!”

“Well it’s not like she’s flying herself! You must’ve done something!”

“I flew her perfectly! If anyone did something to cause this, it’s the idiot that stole her but never bothered to read-” The TARDIS suddenly and violently landed, causing Y/N to lose her grip and land on the ground. They both stayed silent for a moment, before Y/N quietly spoke, “Do you have any idea where we are?”

“Nope.”

They looked at eachother, and almost simultaneously, smiles grew on their faces. The pair walked over to the door. The Doctor opened it, peaked his head out, and once he deemed it safe, opened the door wider so that Y/N could walk past.

“Where the hell are we?” You asked, taking in the view. You’d landed on an alien planet, that much was obvious- the multi-colored grass and two moons rising in the distance made it so even an idiot could figure that out- but neither you nor The Doctor had been to a planet like it before.

“I haven’t the faintest idea.” The Doctor answered you with a grin slapped on his face. Even though he didn’t know this girl, and all logic said he should stay the hell away, something about her felt right. Especially when you returned his grin with just as much enthusiasm.

“Fantastic. I love a good mystery.” And with that, you picked a direction and began walking, leaving The Doctor, dumbfounded, to follow you. “Come along, Doc, we don’t have all day!” The Doctor only scoffed, but followed the mystery girl anyways.

“So what did you mean by us meeting in the wrong order?” The Doctor questioned, trying to figure you out. “Why don’t I just visit you linearly? After all, I’ve got a time machine.”

“Oh, you tried. The TARDIS won’t let you. Whenever you visit me, she won’t let you land where you want. She never seems to have a problem getting me home to the right time though.” You explained, marching through the tall rainbow grass. “Except for once, we accidentally landed at; well, spoilers. But it all works out in the end, always does. She probably brought us here for a reason too.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. Sure, sometimes the TARDIS influences my travels a little bit-” You interrupted him with a scoff, which The Doctor happily ignored- “But she doesn’t just fly herself. Not without help from me. Something else must have brought us here.”

“Oh, so you think a random, seemingly uninhabited planet was able to hijack the TARDIS?” The Doctor would never admit it, but you did have a point. They’d been walking for a while, and so far there were no signs of any civilization. Certainly nothing with the kind of technology to hijack a TARDIS.

“No, I think you don’t know how to fly her properly and you did something to make her bring us here.” He lied. He’d watched her flying, and even he had to accept that she knew what she was doing. But he wasn’t about to tell her that.

“Oh, please-” You cut yourself off, distracted by something happening behind The Doctor. When he turned around, his breath was taken away by the sight. As they had been talking, the sun had begun to set and the moons of the unknown planet began to rise higher. Around them, a flurry of insects had begun flying around. They looked like butterflies, only bigger. Their wings had a faint glow to them, and it was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. Y/N moved next to him, taking in the sight for herself. Soon enough, The Doctor found himself looking at her rather than the insects. One of them landed on her arm, and she turned to look at The Doctor with a wide grin. Just as The Doctor returned it, however, your grin morphed into a look of pain.

“Jesus Christ!” You swatted the bug off of your arm, where it had left a quickly swelling bite.

“Back to the TARDIS!” The Doctor yelled, grabbing your hand and dragging you back. Now that you’d brought attention to yourselves, the insect swarm seemed to be flying after you.

“What are the odds of these things being poisonous?” You asked as you ran, the TARDIS coming closer and closer.

“I don’t know, but you shouldn’t be worried about them being poisonous.” He answered.

“Why not?”

“Cause you didn’t eat one. You should be worried about them being venomous.” He corrected, despite the dire situation.

“Doc!”

~~~

Turns out, those insects, which The Doctor had identified as Derruliflies from the planet Taurillia once you two had made it back to the TARDIS, weren’t any more dangerous than a mosquito. Besides the initially painful bite and the inflammation, you’d be fine. That didn’t stop you from complaining though.

“I can’t believe the TARDIS brought us to that dreadful planet!” You’d been complaining for a half hour now, as The Doctor tried to bring the swelling on your arm down. Despite the fact that the venom wouldn’t harm you much, Your arm ended up extremely swollen, and The Doctor couldn’t very well drop you off on earth without knowing how long the swelling would take to go away or if there would be any other side effects. So now he was doing his best to remove the venom, despite your complaints. “I mean seriously! What was she thinking? You know, I bet she knew those creatures would bite me. I think this is payback for when I was learning how to fly her.”

“What’d you do when you were learning how to fly her?” The Doctor asked, still focused on your now slightly less swollen arm.

“Let’s just say it took me a minute to figure it out.” You said, with a slight grimace. “My teacher was very patient with me, though, so I got there in the end.”

“You’re welcome in advance, then.” The Doctor assumed he’d been the one to teach her in the future, after all, no one else knows how to fly a TARDIS anymore, but your laughter proved that was not the case.

“Please! Riv-um, my teacher had to kick you out because you kept trying to be a backseat driver. You were worse than my dad when he was teaching me to drive a car.” You joked. “And you and I both know you’re hardly qualified to teach someone how to fly a TARDIS, considering you can barely fly her yourself.”

“That’s not true! I’m an excellent driver!”

“You didn’t even pass your exams!” The Doctor only rolled his eyes in response, causing you to laugh even more.

“Whatever. Your arm is all fixed, by the way. You’re welcome.” He said, dropping your arm from his hands. He’d managed to remove the venom, which had caused the swelling and itching to go away rather rapidly. “You may have some residual itching for a few hours, but you’ll be back to normal in a jiff.”

“Thank you.” You said, genuinely, causing The Doctor to meet your eyes. “Really, you didn’t have to do that.”

“Course I did. I’m a Doctor, and you’re my friend.” He paused, “Or, you will be, I guess.”

“C’mon Doc, you and I both know I’m already your friend.”

~~~

When The Doctor brought you home- you were right, the TARDIS was more than happy to drop you off in the right time- he didn’t really want to say goodbye. He wanted to get to know you more, take you with him.

“You sure you wanna go?” He asked, just before you could open the doors back to your life. Your eyebrows shot up, surprised he had asked. Surely he’d asked you to join him before, right? “I mean, I can drop you off here anytime. Why not stay a while?” You gave him a soft smile, before coming over and doing something unexpected; you kissed his cheek.

“Time machine.”

“What?”

You were backing up towards the doors, still with that knowing smile on your face. “Rose. You forgot to tell her that it’s a time machine.” And with that, you turned around, walking out of The TARDIS. Even though he knew he’d see you many more times in the future, The Doctor was still sad to see you go.

~~~

#the doctor x reader #the doctor x you #the doctor x y/n #doctor who #ninth doctor x reader #ninth doctor #doctor who fic #doctor who series #the tardis

70 notes · View notes

snaileer · 4 years

Text

Chips & Salsa Chp 6

Okay, Lance had definitely not thought through the whole ‘angrily stomp out of the room and leave Keith stunned behind him’ thing. Mostly because now Keith was in his room and Lance had nowhere else to be at five in the morning. It was still a good 2 hours until anyone was supposed to be awake.

What that really meant was everybody still had 2 hours of productive free time until they’d agreed Allura was allowed to beckon for them. God, he wished he hadn’t argued for the extra hours of ‘beauty sleep’ now. Even if sleep was all he wanted to do.

Still, maybe the time would give him an opportunity to shake off the lingering heaviness of his nightmare.

Lance fiddled with the bracelet on his arm. Pidge really was their very own genius extraordinaire. It was measured perfectly to his wrist. Which was saying something, because he had itsy-bitsy crazy thin wrists. From his Mom’s side.

His siblings had teased him relentlessly for having ‘dainty’ wrists. Ha! Lance smiled to himself at the thought. If only his family could see him now; he would absolutely destroy them in arm-wrestling.

He might even be able to beat Marco, but his brother had-

The ringing surged, “Ah!” Lance stumbled to the side with his head in his hands. His elbow hit the wall and he yanked back immediately, “OooooH! Mmmm- ! Mother trucker!”

His arm tingled with pins-and-needles as he lost balance and fell to the floor.

“Lance!?”

Shiro?

Shiro.

He ran down the hall towards Lance, “Lance! What’s wrong?”

“I hit-” Lance hissed in pain again, “I hit my funny bone.” He cradled his left arm against his chest.

Shiro froze in surprise, until he started to shake. Within seconds Shiro stopped trying to contain his snickering and was laughing outright.

“Shiro!” Lance said scandalized, “Stop laughing at me! The funny-bone hurts!”

Shiro was laughing so hard he was wheezing, “I’m sorry,” he could barely get a word out, “It’s just so funny!”

Lance dropped his head against the ground with a thump. “It’s still tingling!” He whined into his chest, sounding for all the world like a petulant child. Which only made Shiro laugh harder.

-x-

Now, Coran had seen some things in his days. He’d seen stars and galaxies and war and peace, applez and orranges, kings and queens. The rise of civilizations. The fall of planets. The lives in between them.

Still, it was quite a sight to come upon the blue and black paladins in the hallway of his castle. One rolling on the ground in pain and the other laughing uncontrollably at his friend.

“Paladins?”

“Coran!” Shiro managed to talk as he tried to catch his breath.

“What is the meaning of this, Number one?”

“Lance, hit his-” he wheezed again, “funny bone,” A giant smile still plastered across his face.

Lance shouted out next to him, “There’s nothing funny about the funny bone Shiro!”

“There is for me!”

“Would you like some help, Number Three?” Coran asked as he walked in front of Lance on the floor.

“Dios mio, yes! Please!” Lance took Coran’s hand to pull himself back up, still rubbing his elbow as he glared at Shiro.

Coran shook his head, “I don't think I will ever understand you humans, you’re a very… unique breed.”

“Don't even try with this one. The funny bone is the most useless, pointless thing the human body ever came up with,” Lance stated the fact like it was his greatest enemy.

“I’ll have to disagree with you there, Lance, because that was exactly what I needed this morning,” Shiro smiled smugly.

“You shouldn't even be awake this early!”

“Oh, but I am. And I will never forget this. Oo-!” Shiro hummed with a discovery, “But thank you for reminding me! I was hoping to catch up with you to go over the Blue Lion.”

Lance’s playful smile dropped.

“You have Olympic talents for dampening a mood, you know that right?”

“I have been told that once or twice.” Shiro smirked, “And yet we’ve still got to do it.” He latched his hand onto the back of Lance’s jacket.

Lance’s mind worked overtime to try and figure a way out. He couldn’t confront Blue, not after everything that happened. Everything that he’d done.

“A unique breed indeed,” Coran murmured as he watched Shiro continue to half-drag Lance towards the hangers.

“See you at breakfast, Coran!” Shiro waved at him before turning a corner.

“Hey! There’s an option: breakfast! Y’know… eat, talk... not mess with the Blue Lion.” Lance tried to smile.

Shiro infused his voice with false cheer, “Sure, sounds like a great idea! If you’re willing to actually talk now,” Lance cringed, “Didn’t think so.”

Shiro stopped them in front of the hangar doors, his shoulders sagging a bit, “Listen, Lance, I get the whole not wanting to share with us thing. I don't like talking about my experiences either.” He sighed, “I know it would probably help to talk about it, we both know that, but we also know how hard that is.” Shiro made pointed eye contact with Lance, “So if we’re not going to work on the emotional, then we’ve got to work on the logical. And that means the Blue Lion.”

“Or…” Lance mock shrugged with his hands, “how ‘bout we don't and say we did?”

Shiro raised a judgemental eyebrow.

“Fine, fine,” Lance raised his arms in surrender, “Didn’t think that one would work anyways,” he grumbled, “All I wanted was some sleep.”

Stepping up to the hanger doors felt more ominous than usual. But when they opened, Blue was just as amazing as he remembered.

And her barrier just as strong.

Shiro followed him into the room as he slowly made it to the particle shield.

“Hey, Baby Blue,” he paused to look up at her eyes, “Miss me?”

Lance rested a hand on the barrier, trying to feel her in his mind. She used to be a constant presence. Always there to reassure him, to push him further, to help him be better.

Now?

Now, as he searched for her connection, Lance could feel the walls between them.

Now, as he desperately hoped for even a sliver of her peace, there was nothing.

Now, as his fears were silently confirmed, Lance knew he’d been cut-off from her.

“Sorry, Shiro, it’s just not happening,” He pulled his hand back from the shield quicker than necessary. He hurried to get out of the hanger and alone.

“It’s okay, Lance, I was planning on a bonding session today anyways,” Shiro smiled gently and followed after him.

Lance spun to face him, “Why?! Because you knew this wouldn’t work?!”

Shiro was started back a bit, “No, I just-”

“Don’t worry! I knew it wouldn’t work, too! Of course it wouldn’t work! Why in the wide wide world of Webkinz would Blue ever want me back?! She wouldn’t! I don't even know why any of you want me back! You have Allura now! She’s literally a magical alien princess! How can I compare to that?!”

“We want you back because you're our friend, Lance. You’re the only one comparing yourself to Allura,” Shiro tried to comfort him, tried to fill in those insecurities and worries. He’d seen them in Lance before, known they were there, but they’d grown since he’d been... taken. “We told you: Blue barely let Allura fly her, you are the Blue paladin. Not anybody else.”

“Well somebody forgot to tell her that! Did you know I can feel the walls between us? I can literally feel everything that’s stopping me from connecting to her. To my lion. Can you even imagine that? I wish I could help you, but maybe I’m not even meant to be a paladin anymore.”

“No, that’s not true, Lance. I know it’s not. Please, just come to the training today. We’ll try this again, and-”

“Don't you get it, Shiro?! It’s not going to work! We can keep trying, but it’ll never work because she shut me out! She cut me off!” Lance’s voice saddened, “Completely.”

“We can’t be sure of-”

“Fine! I’ll be there. But I’m not promising anything,” Lance turned his back to Shiro, “So don't get your hopes up.” He left the hangar quickly, pushing himself farther and farther away from the Blue Lion. Further into the abandoned darkness.

Lance curled his arms around himself in the empty hallways, but kept walking. A weight settled in his chest. Accumulating from the nightmare, the fight and, Blue. He was so tired.

The density of the heartache slowed him to a stop in front of the observatory, doors opening automatically.

Oh, how he missed the stars.

He’d been in space for probably more than a year now and he’d spent three months without seeing the stars. Without a window once the entire time.

The tablet-pad in the wall told him he still had an hour ‘till he was needed for anything. The massive window ledges called to him. They were hard, but wide enough and long enough for him to lay on them.

Lance stared out at the space beyond the glass. The infinite universe of stars and planets and cultures.

And silence. Without muddling noise or cheering crowds or hushed whispers or dying fear.

Just calm, clear silence.

A roar thundered through his mind, and he shot upwards, his eyes snapping open. When had he dozed off?

Fading growls echoed in his ears. Quickly being replaced by the ringing.

He just wanted a moment. Just to relax. To relax without shrill screams lingering in the background. He just wanted to escape it. Escape what it pushed him towards. Escape what it made him do.

Not now. Not now. Not now.

Not yet.

Lance worked to calm himself down. It’d been worse than this before and it’d be worse again. He just had to move around it.

Lance climbed off the window ledge and made his way to the wall tablet. He had to get to breakfast with the team.

God, Keith would be there.

God, Shiro would be there. He has the actual worst planning ever. Two fights in as many hours with people he literally can’t avoid.

“Ugh, breakfast is gonna be so awkward,” Lance groaned and then forced himself towards the dining room.

He was correct. Breakfast was insanely awkward. Both Keith and Shiro were there and he pointedly avoided making eye contact with them.

By staring at his goo.

Shiro cleared his throat, “So, today’s gonna be a training day. Just to get back in the rhythm.”

Ah, green goo.

“Of working together.”

Very….

“As a team.”

Green.

“Including a bonding session.”

Much goo. Very wow.

“Lance, unless you’ve discovered the secrets to Voltron in your goo, please listen to me.”

Lance lifted his eyes in a deadpan look, “I am listening and the goo says 42. I said I’d do it so let’s do it.” His chair scraped against the floor when he stood up. He wished it’d been louder.

“I really don't think mind-melding is something I want to do right after eating.” Hunk protested as he collected bowls to drop off in the kitchen.

“We’re not going swimming Hunk, you’ll be fine,” Pidge patted his shoulder in reassurance.

Once everyone had left the kitchen, they headed straight for the training room. Lance ahead of them, leaving tension in his wake. He just wanted this whole mess of a day to be over already.

Coran handed them the headbands in silence and they all sat together again. The same pattern as their first day as Voltron. But everything else was different, so very different.

“This is going to be a bit of a change from last time, since we’re trying to focus on just Lance. I’ve adjusted the headbands to compensate.”

“Let’s just get this over with.” Lance put his headband on, watching the others do the same.

“Relax and breath.”

Lance gritted his teeth against the ringing, he could handle it for now. For this.

“Let your minds connect. The flow between each of you is crucial to your bond as Voltron.”

Hunk reached out first, feeling the link snap into place. Except one. Something blocked him from Lance’s mind.

He tapped it, pressing curiously and shifting around the edges. Searching for the roots and the boundaries of it.

Pidge was second, she hit the wall harder than Hunk had, then followed his lead. Working to discover the problem. To learn.

“Lance, why aren’t you letting us in? You have to let us in for this to work at all.” Pidge snapped at him.

“Yes, I know that. But I can’t feel you guys,” Lance grumbled back.

“Then what’s wrong? Why can't we get in?” Keith argued as he banged against the mental block, trying to force it away.

“I don't know. I can’t feel any of you.”

“Just keep trying, I know we can do this,” Shiro pushed against the barrier between them, the team following suit.

“I can feel you guys now. Just a little.” Lance’s words sounded tight.

“It’s working, just a bit farther,” Hunk urged. They pressed harder.

“I- I don't know guys,” Lance paused for a second, his team didn't, “I think I have a headache-” Lance gasped.

A pulse shot through the wall, slamming into the paladins, forcing them out of the bond,

“GET. OUT. OF. MY. MIND!!”

It smashed against them, knocking them back forcefully.

Hunk wheezed from his place on the floor,

“owww.”

Everyone else groaned in agreement.

“Gaaah!” Lance shouted from his seat, pressing his palms to his temples in pain, “This doesn't make any- what was- but it didn't-”

“Hey, Lance, Lance, come on. What’s happening?” Shiro moved forward quickly on one knee, grabbing hold of his shoulders and trying to get him to look up. “Lance, what was that?”

“I don't know. I don't know what happened. But the moment you guys got pushed back, I remembered something.” Lance shook his head roughly.

“What?” Shiro let go of him and rocked back in surprise.

“You never said you had memory blanks.” Pidge pointed out at him from propped up on her elbows.

“I didn't- I don’t.” Lance tried to guarantee that as fact for himself, “But for a moment, when something lashed out at you, a memory came through. But it can't be mine. It can’t be.”

“Why not?”

“Because I haven’t forgotten anything! I hate it; but I remember everything!” Lance jerked out his hands, “I counted. I measured. I numbered every. single. day. At most I was off by a week, maybe two. But this isn't- It doesn't fit.”

“Wait, Lance, how long did you count?” This time it was Pidge that approached him. Getting as close as she could with her hologram wrist gauntlet.

“Ninety-one,” Lance yelled, “I was there for ninety-one days and I remember every goddamn one of them!”

“Wait but 91 days is only-” Hunk started in the background, but Pidge quickly interrupted.

“Ninety-one days only adds up to about three months.”

“And?”

“And you were missing for six months. Not three.” Pidge flipped around her hologram to show the numbers ticking past days on the calendar, finally stopping at 182.

Six Months.

Next Chapter: https://snaileer.tumblr.com/post/622144446399758336/chips-salsa-chp-7

First Chapter: https://snaileer.tumblr.com/post/613092735756402688/chips-and-salsa-chp-1

64 notes · View notes

regolithheart · 4 years

Text

Love In The Time of Coronavirus: Chapter Six

Summary: One pandemic, one lake house, and two people who loathe one another. Will they be able to survive the outbreak...and each other?

MASTER LIST

Read on AO3.

---------------

CHAPTER SIX:

It was the end of the week and despite their rocky beginning, both Nesta and Cassian had made it through without causing any physical harm to one another. Much to Nesta’s surprise, they had even fallen into a daily routine with shared breakfasts, cocktails at five on the dot, and even cooking dinner together.

She had enjoyed that part of her days the most—almost looking forward to 6pm when she’d wander into the kitchen to see what they were having for dinner. It was easy to talk to Cassian when most of his attention was elsewhere and with her own small tasks to be done, she could easily ignore him if he was being too…Cassian.

Too Cassian.

Before the quarantine she would have labeled him as irritating—too full of himself and stubborn. Things came easy to Cassian: his smile, his jokes, flirting. He was at ease in every situation because he took nothing seriously whereas Nesta took everything seriously. She didn’t understand how he did it, moved through life without analyzing every minuscule detail of it.

Before the quarantine she would have labeled him as a beautiful idiot, because yes, she couldn’t deny the fact that he was good-looking. Try as she might, even alone in her bedroom with no one else to judge her. She still couldn’t say those words, that looking at Cassian sometimes made her weak in the knees.

But that had been before the quarantine. After spending almost a whole week with him, Nesta had begun to discover other parts of Cassian. That he was an attentive listener and generous with his time. That he smiled at everything, even when it wasn’t funny. That he stuck the tip of his tongue out when he was trying to be flirty, but also subconsciously, when he was concentrating on something.

And in the span of six days, she had caught herself wondering what Cassian looked like shirtless, at least twice. Once, when she saw him lounging outside on one of the deck chairs. The rising sun had painted his face with a golden glow and she had wondered what it would have looked like, spilling across his broad shoulders. And a second time, when he had off-handedly pulled back the collar of his shirt to reveal that yes, he did in fact know what real pain was as marked by the whorls of black ink on his flesh.

Nesta had allowed herself a two second glance that had her stomach doing cartwheels. She had bit her lip hard enough to hurt and avoided his eyes for the rest of the dinner.

Yes, Nesta still thought Cassian was brash and too loud. He didn’t know how to respect personal boundaries and made everything his business. And how on Earth he wasn’t able to sit still or in silence for ten minutes straight would always grate on Nesta’s nerves. But he was also all the other small things that she had began discovering as well, the things that made her reconsider how much she actually despised him.

Which made her flustered for completely other reasons.

Looking around for something to distract her, her eyes fell onto her phone.

Perhaps she should finally give Feyre a call. She was beginning to feel guilty for not reaching out, especially because she hadn’t spoken to her baby sister since before their quarantining began.

Glancing at her watch, she figured now was as good a time as any.

Feyre picked up on the second ring.

“Nesta, hi. How are you?” Her voice was soft, happy.

“I wanted to check up on you. Is this a good time?”

“Yes, of course. I’m glad you called.”

Nesta could hear people talking in the background, but it had quieted down when Feyre spoke again. “How are things going with Cas—“ She cleared her throat. “How are you doing?”

Nesta scrunched her nose. She wasn’t sure why, but she had suddenly became annoyed. “Fine.”

Feyre was quiet, but when Nesta didn’t provide any further detail, she spoke again. “That’s good… all of my classes are online now… how’s work?”

Nesta shrugged even though she knew Feyre couldn’t see her. “Business as usual. Some people can’t do their jobs when they’re at work or at home.”

Feyre gave her a small chuckle. “Not everyone is as brilliant as you.” She paused a moment. “What about Cassian? Are you guys getting along?”

There it was again, that lick of irritation. “He’s fine. We’re fine. I can actually be civil, you know.”

“I know that! I was just asking. Making sure he wasn’t giving you a hard time or anything.”

“No.” Nesta felt just a smidge bit guilty. “I mean, he’s not being any more of a pain in my ass than he usually is.” She didn’t know why she was compelled to add, “We’ve been… making dinner together. We’re also taking turns making breakfast.”

“You’re making breakfast?”

“I know how to scoop yogurt into a bowl!”

Feyre laughed. “Can’t argue with you there. You’re the best at it!”

“Damn right, I am.”

“Do you fan out the bananas and dot the granola with raspberries for Cassian, too?”

“No. He has not proven himself worthy of banana-fanning yet.”

Feyre laughed again. “Good. Only Archerons get fanned bananas.” After a few seconds, she let out a soft sigh and her voice was gentle. “But you’re doing okay?”

Nesta bit the inside of her cheek. It was always like Feyre to try and take care of them. Sweet, gentle, Elain, she understood, but sometimes Nesta hated the implication that she couldn’t take care of herself.

“Yes, yes. I’m fine, Feyre.”

“Good. And Elain? Have you talked to her? I try to call but we keep missing each other.”

“I talked to her last night. She sounds bored out of her mind, but I don’t know what she expected locking herself up in an apartment with Graysen.”

“Nesta.” There was that motherly tone again.

“Tell me you disagree.”

“She loves him.”

Nesta’s only response was a derisive snort.

When Feyre spoke again, the austerity was gone and was replaced with a hint of mischievousness that Nesta had learned to detect years ago. “I’m glad you don’t sound like you’re bored out of your mind.”

“I’ve been busy with work.”

“In a beautiful house with the best scenery?”

“It’s… tolerable.”

Feyre cackled at that. “I’ll make sure to let Rhys know that you think his house is tolerable.”

“Please, don’t. It’ll just make his head bigger. I mean come on, Feyre. Who installs a full-sized sauna in their home?”

Her sister’s giggles were starting to become contagious and Nesta smiled. “I thought that, too, but just give in to the sauna, Nesta. You won’t regret it.”

“Fine, but two Pelotons?”

“Okay. I’ll agree with you on that one, but it’s so much nicer when we don’t have to readjust the seat every time we want to ride.”

“Unbelievable. You know, Elain and I had to share one bike until I was ten.”

“Yes, and I got all your hand-me-downs.”

Nesta smirked to herself.

“Listen, I gotta go. We’re just about to eat dinner.”

The photo of Feyre looking so happy with her new found family flashed in Nesta’s mind, making her chest feel oddly tight. “Okay. Have a good night.”

“You, too. Love ya.”

“Same.”

“Bye bye.” Feyre hung up, leaving Nesta’s room feeling even more quiet than it had before.

Wondering what to do with the rest of her day, she gave the book on her nightstand a dejected glance.

Normally, she would have jumped at the opportunity to spend the whole day reading, but she felt restless and decided that perhaps she should make use of the Peloton and sauna downstairs. It wasn’t as though she had any other plans and it would give her a chance to work out some of her sudden listlessness.

Silently thanking Elain for making her pack gym clothes, she changed into a matching set of stormy blue high-waisted tights and sports bra and gave herself a once over in the full-length mirror as she pulled her hair into a high pony-tail. Out of habit, she swiped her lips with her favorite mint balm before leaving the room.

The house was quiet and for a brief second, Nesta wondered were Cassian was. Again, his bedroom door was ajar and the room empty and she hadn’t heard him in the kitchen either.

She wondered if he was stretched out on the lawn as she’d seen him before, during her work days—no doubt spying on her or more likely, trying to get on her nerves and distract her from important emails and conference calls. It couldn’t have been a coincidence that he had chosen to reposition the outdoor furniture to sit perfectly framed in the view from the office window.

Nesta was debating whether or not she should call him out on it the next time she saw him when she entered the gym and stopped dead in her tracks.

Standing in the middle of the room, toweling off his brow was Cassian. His t-shirt was loose and the V of the collar hung low, revealing the sculpted hardness of his chest. Muscles defined and taut in a deep bronze, glistened with sweat. The dark curling ends of his tattoo rippled as he moved—like ink gliding over water—and Nesta’s fingertips tingled.

Looking up, his finally saw her standing in the doorway. Their eyes locked for what felt like an eternity and then he spoke, breaking the spell.

“Morning, sweetheart.” He grinned, slinging his towel over his shoulder.

Nesta crossed her arms, narrowing her eyes. “Don’t call me that.”

Cassian chuckled, making it sound like she’d just told a joke instead of sending a death glare his way.

“I’d ask if you were lost, but judging from your outfit, it doesn’t look like you’re on your way to the ball.”

Nesta watched as Cassian’s eyes dragged from her sneakers up her legs, then torso, and then…

She turned, walking over to the stationary bikes, hoping he hadn’t caught the flush that was beginning to bloom across her chest.

Looking at the Peloton, Nesta began to question her decision. Thinking she should switch over to the treadmill, she felt Cassian’s breath against the shell of her ear.

“Here, let me help.”

How he had managed to sneak up behind her without her noticing was a surprise, but not as big of one as how close he had gotten. She could feel the heat radiating off of him and if she took a half-step back, there was a strong chance she wouldn’t have been able to stop herself from melting into him.

Instead, she straightened her back and at the sudden lost of heat, knew that Cassian had widened the distance between them. Chancing a glance behind her, she saw him leaning against the treadmill. His hand gently—casually—rubbing the back of his neck.

“You need special shoes for that,” he said, jutting his chin towards the pedals. “Feyre’s are in the cabinet. You wear the same size, right?”

Nesta took her time retrieving the shoes and putting them on, anything to give her a moment to even out her breathing and collect herself. It was only the surprise of running into him that had thrown her off.

Focus, Nesta. You’ve seen a muscled man before.

When she got back to the bikes, Cassian was already tinkering with the levers and bolts.

“You’re taller than Feyre. We’ll have to adjust the seat.” He held out his hand.

Nesta swallowed, but did not let her hand slip into his. Instead, she nudged him away with her elbow to give herself some space.

Cassian chuckled. He remained standing where Nesta had pushed him, but he was still close enough for her to feel the rumble of his laughter on her skin—close enough for her to smell the salt and sweat on him.

She scowled.

Cassian moved behind her to tug at the seat, adjusting it to align with her hip before leaning over to tighten the screw, fixing it into place. She watched as his arms flexed, the tight chords of his muscles shifting easily beneath that deep copper skin.

She realized she had never stood this close to him before, so close that she could see a bead of sweat glide down the chiseled stone column of his neck and she hated the tightness she was feeling in the pit of her stomach, but she also couldn’t look away.

When Cassian straightened, Nesta bristled.

“I need you to hold your arm out so I can adjust the seat distance. Elbow at the seat front.”

This time, Nesta did finally allow Cassian to guide her and the gentle brush of his hand at her elbow, her arm, felt oddly intimate. His palm was calloused and the scrape of it against her skin made her spine tingle.

His hands were so big.

Nesta was reminded of where she was when Cassian told her she could get onto the bike. Eager for the distraction, she locked her shoe into the pedal and swung her leg around to the other side. Again, she felt the heat of Cassian’s body close to her skin, this time from the hand hovering just above the small of her back.

“I can handle it from here,” she said, dismissing him.

Clearing her throat, she began scrolling through the classes on the screen, not chancing a look at him.

She had already felt too vulnerable in the five minutes standing next to him and now that she was sitting on a bike, her feet locked into place, she couldn’t allow herself the possibility of toppling over, or worse, not being able to escape if he fixed her with one of his looks.

Cassian didn’t say anything until he got to the door. Not turning back, he said, “Have fun,” before leaving.

It wasn’t until Nesta heard the door click shut that she let her shoulders sag. Expelling a deep breath, she shook out the tension in her arms, her neck.

Scrolling through the classes, she decided a ninety minute power ride was exactly what she needed to shake the unfamiliar jitteriness that had suddenly seized her entire body.

---------------

Cassian let his forehead rest against the wall as he released a shuttering breath. He had made it to the end of the hallway before having to stop to collect himself. Slinging his towel across the back of his neck, he grabbed both ends and tugged firmly.

God.

He had barely made it out of there. Had surprised himself when he was able to say something that wasn’t a declaration of how much he wanted to kiss her, touch her.

He hadn’t been expecting it, her showing up at the gym like that and in those clothes…

He had always thought she was gorgeous. She had taken his breath away the first time he had laid eyes on her and in their subsequent meetings, she’d only proven herself more and more beautiful. But today… with that thin material matching the exact color of her eyes and clinging to each and every one of her curves, he couldn’t help himself. He just had to be near her.

And so he moved—stalked in three long strides—close enough to touch her, but not daring to.

He had half-expected her to turn around and snap at him. To claw at him with her nails and her words. And when she didn’t, and he saw the blush against the shell of her ear, exactly where his breath had been, he thought that maybe…

But her back had stiffened and so he backed away, tried to plaster on that cool exterior he could easily hide behind, not wanting to make her more uncomfortable than she had been. Of course, he was only human and when she walked off to find Feyre’s shoes, Cassian’s eyes had followed her. Followed those long legs, the curve of her backside, and the swell of her hips as they swayed.

He had had to muster every bit of strength in his body to remain calm. And for a moment, he had considered leaving the room to escape the torture.

But as soon as she’d come back within arm’s reach of him, he couldn’t walk away. And she had let him touch her arm.

It had been the most chaste of touches. A past Cassian would have laughed at himself for being so modest, but it had set his hand on fire. Her skin was so soft, and for a heartbeat, he had let himself wonder if she’d let him touch her anywhere else. Her shoulder? Her neck? Those pouty lips?

If she’d let him, he’d trace his fingertips across that delicate skin to mark her—let her know where his mouth would follow.

Cassian groaned.

He felt foolish, like a giddy teenager touching a girl for the first time, instead of the grown man he was. One who had taken many lovers, all of whom had let him do much more than touch their elbow.

And that was the problem, wasn’t it?

They had let him—wanted him to, begged him, in fact. But Nesta… all she did was push him away and brush him off. She had glared at him and bristled at his closeness. And when he was done being useful, she had dismissed him wholly.

Cassian had thought that she was finally beginning to thaw against him. Their interactions had become cordial, almost friendly at times. But again, she had managed to prove him wrong.

He raked a hand through his hair, tugging hard. Then pushed himself off the wall, and headed upstairs, looking to take a very, very cold shower.

#acotar #nessian #nessian fanfic #nesta archeron #cassian #cassian archeron

23 notes · View notes

verystrawberrytae · 4 years

Text

Taekook are distant, a short rant

Sorry, i lied in the title.

Disclaimer. What I am talking about is taekook relationship in a platonic way, as a precious bond between two members. I don’t have a problem if you interpret it in a romantic one, I am a taekooker myself, just please take note that I won’t address those aspects anywhere here.

Before I start my rant I want to tell everyone who is reading it that you don’t really have to read it. If you have your opinion about yesterday’s events set in stone then there is no need for you to go through it all. If you are here just to mock what I will be saying then be my guest, I don’t really care for anyone’s opinion. This post is for me and me only. It’s my way of venting frustrations and if someone stumbles upon it and decides that it was helpful then great.

As I’ve said it will be a rant so please do not expect it to be highly organised because it won’t be.

What I want to start with is - I have two explanations for the infamous scene of the recent episode of In the Soop. This scene has awakened something wild not only amongst taekookers but also amongst those that have never cared for taekook bonds or even those that have openly shaded and hated it. I won’t point fingers, if you are active on twitter, you probably know who I am talking about.

And before I explain those two perspectives I want to take a moment and say that whatever it was that led to this scene coming to life, it is a very beautiful scene. If it was a scene in one of the kdramas that I watch, it would probably become one of the most iconic scenes ever. The emotions seemed so true, the story presented was both heartbreaking and heartwarming. What I try to say here is, the aesthetics of it was very pleasing. But there are many aspects that make me not able to appreciate it to its fullest. What is the biggest one of them? This is not a kdrama, this is the life of two real people, not imaginary characters.

The conversation was very intimate and that leads me to actually disapprove of what I will present as the first perspective. Still I think it’s important to mention it. Just so you know that I have thought deeply about it and I hadn’t dismissed it just like this.

I guess that it’s the simplest explanation. It requires you to believe that what you have seen on camera is one hundred percent true and there is nothing else beyond it. And it is what most people stopped at. And it’s not really a bad thing.

The explanation is: Taekook indeed had some problem with their relationship and they patched it up while In the Soop was being recorded. They had the conversation shown in the episode. They have resolved whatever stood between them and they are now far better then they were before.

And really, there are many arguments that support this. But want to know something? Most of the arguments have to be drawn from official content provided by their company we have got. The content that is heavily edited, cut and just captioned however they want. (I will be talking about captions later on too because it is something that actually created most of this mess.)

And before you roll your eyes and say that Big Hit does not hide Taekook so why would they manipulate content to fit any narrative, I will just say that it does not to the exact many people believe but if you take few minutes and look deeper you will notice that it’s not that Taekook does not interact but they are interrupted, cut and just generally disregarded when it comes to them being viewed as possible unit by the company.

Of course, you don’t have to agree with me. I will be talking more about it in the second to last part of this rant because it is a part of one of the branches of the second perspective I will be presenting.

Apart from official content provided by Big Hit that they feed us there is really not much to agree with the perspective unless we want to breach taboo and analyse songs written or covered by them which I won’t do and strongly discourage you from doing because it’s something that shouldn’t be done. Their works are their own, we are only fans and unless something is explicitly stated, we should refrain from bringing it into the shipping agenda. I am saying it for both taekookers and fans of other ships.

If you stand by this perspective and you are a taekooker then i hope it simply made you realize that they are human too, that the relationships between members are not always what we see. If you are a taekook anti then now you should shut up about them not being close anymore because now according to what we have seen they have sorted things out and by the content released now you can see that they come back to being attached to a hip.

If you weren’t bought by this perspective then I have one more for you. This one branches into two completely different paths but they have a common origin.

The whole scene was scripted and acted out by the boys for us to see.

And it’s what I actually believe because please do not let yourself be fooled, the content we get is not always one that has been born out of a spontaneous action. Remember that it is an entertainment industry, the company’s goal is to please the fans.

I am not trying to debuk boys’ relationship, all of them are precious but it’s a show directed to fans so that they have fun and are happy. There is so much staff, there are so many cuts. We do not see the whole picture but we see what they want us to see.

If you do not think that it was scripted then it’s better you stop reading here. What is going to come is just me going into details why I think we can’t really take whatever was said in the scene for granted and we shouldn’t actually think that it’s a whole truth and there is nothing more for it. Again I respect your opinion if you do not agree with this.

Now let me move onto presenting the two branches of this perspective. The one is harsh, negative one and I will say it at the beginning loud and clear. I don’t believe any words that will be typed here about taekook. It is just a possible reason, that actually I think is the biggest bullshit that has ever come from under my fingers.

They hate each other and can’t stand each other so the staff makes them have this conversation so fans have something to cling onto. They want us to see that there is nothing wrong, while actually they can’t even have a civil convo out of the spotlight.

And you see? It’s complete bullshit. We can all see how much they care for each other and this is something antis try to deny only to be laughed at. Their relationship is precious and there is no doubt about it. That’s why I completely disapprove of it. If you need any evidence for it then I am sorry for you, it just means that you do not pay attention to any of their interactions and you are quick to judge them in accordance to poorly made edit on tiktok brought to life by an insecure child.

The second branch of this perspective is, it was scripted so that it again fits all the narratives they are pushing. The narrative that so many people believe - Taekook aren’t close (which... really? please, find a better excuse, i beg you, if you are an anti, that is not valid reason for hating on their bond). Have you noticed how Taekook is so loud and visible lately? You probably did, but that fits into this perspective perfectly. Taekook talked things out so surely they can be seen together again. So you know, everything that has been in the past portrayed by the official content is still valid but they can again be seen because that is what they need. It’s merely an excuse as to why suddenly we can see and hear taekook without the previous narrative being disapproved.

If they really needed to talk things out they wouldn’t have done it on camera. As I’ve said that was an intimate conversation. They were talking about their feelings. If there really was a problem, I believe that they would have resolved it away from everyone. If it was a moment for them and for their bond, we wouldn’t have seen it unless the moment wasn’t for them but for the audience.

If it doesn’t make sense to you then I really advice you to stop reading. I do not want to torture you any further.

And you know why they need it, the visibility of Taekook? Because Taekook, despite other ships gaining popularity very fast, is still the most popular ship in the industry. You can disagree but for what? It should not be a competition. Taekook is still this one iconic ship that has so many supporters. But with so many supporters comes an insane number of haters. They try to feed both - those who love taekook and those who hate it. Please be reminded that shipping is also a business. With the increase of popularity there comes an increase of interactions and then again increase of popularity. But those ships that are already popular need their fair share of interactions, so that their supporters are also satisfied. Because as I have said they have still many supporters who are not going anywhere anytime soon.

Also, yeah, they can let just one ship grow and the other leave for it to be forgotten but I don’t believe they have no idea about the shipping wars that are happening. I am not saying that it is big and vital thing for them but it certainly makes things more spiced up and it is also some sort of marketing strategy.

It is a pure business. It still does not mean that the bonds members have are just a product to sell and nothing else. I believe that behind the cam they are even more sweet and adorable with each other and it applies to all the bonds not just Taekook.

And why don’t I believe that they aren’t actually close? Look at the content which is not coming from BigHit. The one from KBS or MBC. The one that come from behind the scenes of ads they have been doing. Those most probably weren’t edited by BigHit, there is a great possibility that no editor of the official contents touched it in any way. Look at how they act during lives. You can choose not to notice, that’s fine too.

I said that I will mention the captions. Why do you think they are there? Especially those that say that their conversation is ‘awkward’, ‘embarrassing’ or that they are ‘distant’? Those captions at first look are nothing too serious. Most of them are cute. But some of them make you, or at least try to make you think in a certain way. So that you understand it the way they want you to understand.

At the end of the day, everyone is allowed to have their own opinion. You may think what you want. It probably won’t be my last rant here but please let it be known that I won’t check any comments. I have had my fair share of hate on twitter for expressing my opinion and I just know that it’s better for my mental health to stay away from what other people may think about what I have posted.

To all my fellow taekookers, do not feel discouraged. Remember that we are here for all seven boys and we should love them all equally. Shipping is supposed to be fun so if you think your whole life is ruined because of the scene please reach out to someone. Shipping should never be this deep.

To all the antis. You too please be reminded that those are two real people and if the scene hasn’t been scripted then know that their relationship either way has become even stronger then before. Do not build your life on hating someone.

All the members are precious, love all of them, protect all of them, express your love for all of them. Do not let antis ruin your fun and happiness.

Let’s hope for another number 1 on Billboard Hot 100 next week.

And have a nice day.

#taekook vkook kookv #taekook #vkook #kookv

3 notes · View notes

miladylocksley · 5 years

Text

Carry On | Pride and Prejudice

Ok so I may be completely way off or too slow not to have realized this before, but Carry On and Pride and Prejudice parallels???

Let’s start with enemies to lovers.

“We were enemies.” “You were the centre of my universe,” I say. “Everything else spun around you.”

(Carry On, 506)

“Lizzie,” said he, “what are you doing? Are you out of your senses, to be accepting this man? Have you not always hated him?”

(Pride and Prejudice, 272)

Baz and Simon are already on opposite sides before they even meet on account of magical politics. The Old Families vs. the Mage.

Magicians don’t have kings and queens, but the Pitches are the nearest thing we have to a royal family—they probably would have crowned themselves at some point if they’d ever expected anyone to challenge their authority.

(Carry On, 82)

They want Watford to go back to the way it used to be—a place for only the most rich and the most powerful.

(Carry On, 83)

Which then grew into a difference of status on account of Baz’s ability to excel at magic and Simon’s struggle to catch up.

What did he say to Agatha? What did he promise? Maybe he didn’t have to say anything. Maybe he just had to be himself. Smarter than I am. Better looking. Wealthier. Fucking horsier—he could go to all her events and wear the right suit and the right shoes. He’d know which necktie went with which month of the year. If he weren’t a vampire, Baz’d be bloody perfect.

(Carry On, 145)

Lizzie and Darcy were again established as opposites purely based on social class.

but his friend Mr. Darcy soon drew the attention of the room by his fine, tall person, handsome features, noble mien, and the report which was in general circulation within five minutes after his entrance, of his having ten thousand a year.

(Pride and Prejudice, 8)

And later on, on their snap judgment of each other solely based on their first impressions.

His character was decided. He was the proudest, most disagreeable man in the world, and everybody hoped that he would never come there again.

(Pride and Prejudice, 8)

She is tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt me; I am in no humour at present to give consequence to young ladies who are slighted by other men.

(Pride and Prejudice, 9)

Similarly, Baz rejects Simon when they first meet.

I stumbled forward and looked around, and Baz was walking towards me. Looking so cool. Like he was coming my way because he wanted to, not because there was a mystical magnet in his gut. The magic doesn’t stop until you and your new roommate shake hands—I held my hand out to Baz immediately. But he just stood there for as long as he could stand it.

(Carry On, 167)

From then on, they are kept apart by external forces bigger than themselves.

“What if,” he says, stepping closer, “ I help you find out who killed your mum, then you help me fight the Humdrum, and we just forget about the rest?” “ ‘The rest,’ ” I say, turning around. “Way to oversimplify a decade of corruption and abuse of power.” “Are you talking about the Mage?” “Yes.” He looks pained. “I wish you wouldn’t.” “How can I not talk about the Mage when I’m talking to the Mage’s Heir?” “Is that how you think of me?” “Isn’t that how you think of yourself? Oh, right. I forgot—you don’t think at all.” Simon groans and rakes his hair. “Jesus Christ. Do you ever not go for the lowest blow? Like, do you ever think, ‘Maybe I shouldn’t say the most cruel thing just now’?” “I’m trying to be efficient.” He leans against the shelf where I’ve set the whiteboard. “It’s vicious.” “You should talk, Snow. You always go for the kill shot.” “When I’m fighting. We’re not fighting.” “We’re always fighting,” I say, going back to the board.

(Carry On, 362)

“It’s not that I don’t prefer this. It’s that . . .” I sigh. “I can’t even imagine it. My family objects to everything the Mage stands for.”

(Carry On, 364)

In the case of Lizzie and Darcy, it is the latter’s lack of tact that causes the most trouble but, much like Baz in the example above, Darcy is portraying—though clumsily—just what and whom stands in their way. They come from different worlds.

His sense of her inferiority—of its being a degradation—of the family obstacles which judgment had always opposed to inclination, were dwelt on with a warmth which seemed due to the consequence he was wounding, but was very unlikely to recommend his suit.

(Pride and Prejudice, 138)

“I might as well inquire,” replied she, “why with so evident a design of offending and insulting me, you chose to tell me that you liked me against your will, against your reason, and even against your character?”

(Pride and Prejudice, 139)

We’re now moving on to one half of the couple and their secret crush.

And when I felt myself slipping too far, I held on to the one thing I’m always sure of— Blue eyes. Bronze curls. The fact that Simon Snow is the most powerful magician alive. That nothing can hurt him, not even me. That Simon Snow is alive. And I’m hopelessly in love with him.

(Carry On, 176)

Occupied in observing Mr Bingley’s attentions to her sister, Elizabeth was far from suspecting that she was herself becoming an object of interest in the eyes of his friend. Mr. Darcy had at first scarcely allowed her to be pretty; he had looked at her without admiration at the ball; and when they next met, he looked at her only to criticise. But no sooner had he made it clear to himself and his friends that she had hardly a good feature in her face, than he began to find it was rendered uncommonly intelligent by the beautiful expression of her dark eyes. To this discovery succeeded some others equally mortifying. Though he had detected with a critical eye more than one failure of perfect symmetry in her form, he was forced to acknowledge her figure to be light and pleasing; and in spite of his asserting that her manners were not those of the fashionable world, he was caught by their easy playfulness. Of this was she perfectly unaware; to her he was only the man who made himself agreeable nowhere, and who had not thought her handsome enough to dance with.

(Pride and Prejudice, 17-18)

A crush which not only becomes much more, unbeknownst to the other party, but which is left unspoken for so long it becomes unbearable.

“For a long time,” I say. “Hmmm?” he opens one eye. “I’ve wanted to do this for a long time. Almost since we met . . .” Snow closes his eyes again and smiles like he’s trying not to. I smile, too, only because he isn’t watching. “I thought it was going to kill me.”

(Carry On, 356)

“In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love.”

(Pride and Prejudice, 138)

“I cannot fix on the hour, or the spot, or the look, or the words, which laid the foundation. It is too long ago. I was in the middle before I knew that I had begun.”

(Pride and Prejudice, 275)

Though both Baz and Darcy start by trying their utmost to completely deny having any romantic inclination.

“If I’d known it was this easy to get rid of you,” Baz called after me, “I would’ve let you catch up with me weeks ago!”

(Carry On, 106)

I hated the sight of him—I hated what the sight of him did to me.

(Carry On, 180)

He began to feel the danger of paying Elizabeth too much attention.

(Pride and Prejudice, 43)

The whole situation does not look to be improving anytime soon for Baz and Darcy when it comes to any hope of reciprocation because Simon and Lizzie—at least in the beginning—never forgive, never forget.

Ebb nods and pets the goat. “To think you used to be at each other’s throats.” “We’re still at each other’s throats.” She looks up at me doubtfully. She has narrow blue eyes, bright blue--brighter somehow because her face is so dirty. “Ebb,” I insist, “he tried to kill me.” “Not successfully.” She shrugs. “Not recently.” “He’s tried to kill me three times! That I know of! It doesn’t actually matter whether it worked.” “It matters a bit,” she says. “‘Sides, how old was he the first time, eleven? Twelve? That hardly counts.” “It counts with me,” I say. “Does it.” I huff. “Yes. Ebb. It does. He hated me before he even met me.” “Exactly,” she says. “Exactly!” “I’m just saying--been a long time since I had to spell you two apart.”

(Carry On, 90-91)

“Another time, Lizzie,” said her mother, “I would not dance with him, if I were you.” “I believe, ma’am, I may safely promise you never to dance with him.”

(Pride and Prejudice, 15)

I mean duh, ‘cause they keep being dicks.

I cannot put down the numerous examples of Baz trying to hurt Simon over the years, whether physically through a monster or a magical recording device or with his unforgiving tongue (yes, the double entendre was on purpose), which has understandably rendered Simon paranoid.

I step out of Niall’s way. “If he’s planning something, I’ll find out,” I say. “I always do.”

(Carry On, 84)

Darcy keeps being rude or just legit ignoring Lizzie (’cause denial), so how he ever thought she might welcome his addresses is beyond me. Lizzie only meets any attempt at civility with suspicion.

Mr. Darcy, with grave propriety, requested to be allowed the honour of her hand, but in vain. Elizabeth was determined; nor did Sir William at all shake her purpose by his attempt at persuasion. “You excel so much in the dance, Miss Eliza, that it is cruel to deny me the happiness of seeing you; and though this gentleman dislikes the amusement in general, he can have no objection, I am sure, to oblige us for one half-hour.” “Mr. Darcy is all politeness,” said Elizabeth, smiling.

(Pride and Prejudice, 20)

Thankfully, Simon and Lizzie begin to see their respective love interests in a whole new light.

Baz’s mouth is colder than Agatha’s. Because he’s a boy, I think, and then: No, because he’s a monster. He’s not a monster. He’s just a villain. He’s not a villain. He’s just a boy. I’m kissing a boy. I’m kissing Baz.

(Carry On, 343)

There was certainly at this moment, in Elizabeth’s mind, a more gentle sensation towards the original than she had ever felt in the height of their acquaintance. The commendation bestowed on him by Mrs Reynolds was of no trifling nature. What praise is more valuable than the praise of an intelligent servant? As a brother, a landlord, a master, she considered how many people’s happiness were in his guardianship!—how much of pleasure or pain it was in his power to bestow!—how much of good or evil must be done by him! Every idea that had been brought forward by the housekeeper was favourable to his character, and as she stood before the canvas on which he was represented, and fixed his eyes upon herself, she thought of his regard with a deeper sentiment of gratitude than it had ever raised before; she remembered its warmth, and softened its impropriety of expression.

(Pride and Prejudice, 180)

But they still do not know when their feelings began to change.

The looking at Baz and thinking about the way his hair falls in a lazy wave over his forehead . . . Yeah, nope. I’ve thought about that before.

(Carry On, 351)

“Why did I kiss you?” “Yeah.” “I guess I wanted to,” I say, shrugging. “Since when?” I shrug again, and it pisses him off.

(Carry On, 353)

“Will you tell me how long you have loved him?” “It has been coming on so gradually, that I hardly know when it began.”

(Pride and Prejudice, 270)

But there is not doubt; they are each other’s perfect match.

“I’m not the Humdrum,” I repeat, when I get the chance. “I’d know if I were.” “What you are is a fucking tragedy, Simon Snow. You literally couldn’t be a bigger mess.” He tries to kiss me, but I hold back—“And you like that?” “I love it,” he says. “Why?” “Because we match.”

(Carry On, 420)

“What do I not owe you? You taught me a lesson, hard indeed at first, but most advantageous. By you I was properly humbled. I came to you without a doubt of my reception. You showed me how insufficient were all my pretensions to please a woman worthy of being pleased.”

(Pride and Prejudice, 267)

“It is settled between us already that we are to be the happiest couple in the world.”

(Pride and Prejudice, 270)

“Well, my dear,” said he, when he ceased speaking, “I have no more to say. If this be the case, he deserves you. I could not have parted with you, my Lizzy, to any one less worthy.”

(Pride and Prejudice, 273)

BONUS

How did it take you so long to figure it out?

“Baz,” I say. “My roommate.” “The dead one? With the pretty eyes?” “Yes.”

(Carry On, 99)

“And do not you think him a very handsome gentleman, ma’am?” “Yes, very handsome.”

(Pride and Prejudice, 177)

I’m a mess, but I’m the mess that you wanted™

“His hair is a mess, and his face is flushed, and he looks like he might go off right there, without any provocation.

[…]

All the blood I’ve got in me rises to my ears and cheeks.”

(Carry On, 290-291)

Mr. Darcy said very little, and Mr. Hurst nothing at all. The former was divided between admiration of the brilliancy, which exercise had given to her complexion, and doubt as to the occasion’s justifying her coming so far alone.

(Pride and Prejudice, 25)

Trying—and failing—to be subtle

“It was just flirting,” Baz says. “It’s not like I tried to feed her to a chimera.”

(Carry On, 277)

Mr. Darcy drew his chair a little towards her, and said, “You cannot have a right to such very strong local attachment. You cannot have been always at Longbourn.”

(Pride and Prejudice, 131)

They’re all such disasters

When the figure steps forward, I recognize him at once. Tall. Black hair swept back from his forehead. Lips curled up in a sneer . . . I know that face as well as my own. Baz.

(Carry On, 150)

They were within twenty yards of each other, and so abrupt was his appearance that it was impossible to avoid his sight. Their eyes instantly met, and the cheeks of each were overspread with the deepest blush. He absolutely started, and for a moment seemed immovable from surprise; but shortly recovering himself, advanced towards the party, and spoke to Elizabeth, if not in terms of perfect composure, at least of perfect civility.

(Pride and Prejudice, 180)

Carry On : St Martin’s Griffin (Paperback) Pride and Prejudice : The Modern Library Classics (Paperback)

#snowbaz #carry on #rainbow rowell #pride and prejudice #jane austen

31 notes · View notes

jangoandtheclones · 5 years

Text

some little thoughts on tros

(spoilers, for who hasn’t seen it)

(also these are my opinions and i am not stating anything in a “i am right about everything” sort of way, nor will i argue or get mad at anyone who thinks differently or was perfectly happy with how the movie turned out) (let’s just be nice to one another and discuss things peacefully, it’s fine if we don’t agree on everything but we’re all in this fandom together, you know?)

(also this is all over the place and just rambling, i apologise)

Overall I had an enjoyable time watching TROS. I did have a few problems here and there, but there were things I liked.

I was actually very interested in the Palpatine revelation, and I thought the scenes between him and Rey (and Ben when he finally showed up) were very cool.

I could also get behind a Kylo Ren/Ben Solo redemption arc, and even though there are probably other ways they could have gone about doing it, I’m not terribly unhappy with how they did it. I actually really liked that scene between him and Han, mirroring the scene in TFA where he kills him, I thought it was nice and I’m a sucker for cinematic parallels (I have no idea if that’s the right term, if it is not I would appreciate it if someone corrected me). I also got big-time Han Solo vibes off Ben when he ran in to fight people with A SINGLE BLASTER. And that little shrug when Rey Force-teleports the lightsaber to him was fun, idk. I was always pretty interested in the character, I’m not too unhappy with how he turned out, buuuuuuut...

...while I can imagine the kiss at the end being maybe a “oh my god thank you for saving me” thing rather than a “I love you romantically let’s get married” sort of thing if I really try to look at it that way, it still feels quite forced to me. I always saw Kylo’s behaviour toward Rey in the previous two movies as more manipulative to try and gain a powerful ally he had a Force connection with, rather than attempts at gaining her affections or whatever. Heck, I even considered desperation at the thought of gaining an ally that could help him get away from Snoke and rule the galaxy (I haven’t watched TLJ recently, this may have been exactly what he said he wanted, so if that is the case, nevermind!). Basically, I just never at any point could see Kylo actually liking Rey, and I especially could never see Rey liking him. I could see Rey feeling pity, maybe, as he’s clearly tormented and brainwashed by Snoke (or Palpatine, as this movie revealed), but romance? I’ve seen people compare Kylo/Ben many times to Mr. Darcy (you know, Pride & Prejudice) and I feel like people often miss out on the fact that Darcy didn’t torture Elizabeth for information, nor did he kill her friends, nor was he known previously for mass murder, you know?

Also, Poe Dameron’s suddenly revealed past as a spice-runner? I only have two of the Poe Dameron comics (which I thought were canon material?) and I was wondering if this was ever brought up in later issues? The spice-runner thing seems to come out of nowhere and just felt really out of place to me, I didn’t really like it. It didn’t feel like it fit his established character, I felt like they were trying to turn him into a new character and it didn’t feel right to me, I couldn’t get into it. I wasn’t too happy with the way Poe was treated in TLJ, but in TROS I just felt uncomfortable with how his character was handled.

I liked Poe’s funny moments (”I KNEW IT!” is still echoing in my ears and shall continue to do so for many weeks to come), but the spice-runner thing... I just don’t get why this was added. Any of his knowledge on “shady” things didn’t seem weird to me at all for a character who regularly goes on dangerous missions, sometimes secretly, I honestly don’t feel like “oh yeah he was a space drug dealer” does anything to explain how he can basically hotwire a starfighter or whatever. I’m curious to hear what other people thought of his characterisation in this film, I’m open to having my mind changed, but I am genuinely not happy with this at the moment. Also, the addition of a possible former flame was unexpected to me too (though I will admit, his little flirty look at the end followed by her shaking her head “no” was kind of funny).

Finn deserved better, as usual... I like the thought of him meeting other former stormtroopers, he got a “It’s not just me!” moment and I thought that was awesome (and the thought of Lando taking these poor kids out to find out where they’re from warms my heart so much). And oh my goodness, Force-sensitive Finn is something I have been waiting for and expecting since the beginning... But I feel like there is so much more he could have been doing, he’s such a good character and I feel like he isn’t given enough to work with.

Honestly, would love to see Finn as a Jedi one day, that shot of John Boyega on Starkiller Base with Luke’s lightsaber in The Force Awakens is still one of my favourite moments in this trilogy.

I liked Rose Tico and I wish she had more to do in this film. She got more hate than she deserved in TLJ and Kelly Marie Tran is a diamond.

Finally, I like the idea of Hux being so frustrated with having to answer to a highly unstable space wizard with a laser sword, and trying to help out the opposing side simply to spite him. BUT, I feel it could have been handled differently? Maybe his character could be a little smarter about it? I feel like he had the right space villain motivation, but he was kinda stupid about it, and the movie kinda threw this revelation at us and then ended it almost immediately. Idk, I don’t know too much about Hux except for that his first name is Armitage and he’s an evil Bill Weasley, maybe it was perfectly in character.

Overall, I had a fun time. I would have liked a few things to have been different, even if I’m not sure how I personally would have changed them right now, but overall I don’t regret having seen the movie.

If you read, feel free to disagree with anything (or even everything!), but please don’t get mad at me and please explain or argue your points in a civil manner, I see too many people argue and insult each other over what they liked and didn’t like in these movies.

Also, thanks for reading! ♡

#star wars #mypost #tros #the rise of skywalker #poe dameron #rey #finn #rose tico #hux #kylo ren #spoilers

3 notes · View notes

bbparker · 5 years

Text

Please Read if You’ve Watched Endgame

Spoilers AHEAD

So there is some big ass bullshit going around about people being assholes about Tony dying instead of Steve or even Steve’s ending in general and I’m here to say - shut up.

It’s okay if you do not agree with the ending, they weren't expecting 100% compliance with it. But writing and tweeting DIRECTLY to the actors, who don’t write scripts, and telling them that that’s NotMySteveRogers and telling them they should have died instead of ... then y’all can fucking leave.

You’re allowed to not like it. You’re allowed to say I don’t think thats how it should have ended. You’re perfectly allowed to write, say and publish works doing the opposite.

What you're not allowed to do is tweet actors, some who are very well known for anxiety about their work and life, about how much they ruined your life or some shit because they didn't do a good job or went the wrong way with the character.

I’m pretty open because I know people have different views and are very connected to these characters, as I am myself, having Captain America as a huge male role model growing up. But that does not excuse bad behaviour in the form of cyber bullying.

Yes, they’re actors but sending nasty words to half a world away to say that they ruined their character can be seen as a form of bullying and no matter how you twist it- its unacceptable.

For this reason here is listed reasons why Steve and Tony’s endings were acceptable and reasonable to be done the way they were.

I encourage those who agree and disagree to add to this in an adult fashion and try to see all the different points of view! :)

Steve Rogers:

He’s literally been fighting wars for 100 years

Consecutively, he’s fought in about 6 wars (WW2, Avengers 1, Ultron, Civil War, Infinity War & Endgame)

He has literally never stopped loving Peggy, throughout every film he has her with him.

He needed to get a life but the only life he ever wanted was with Peggy, not just another girl

Bucky is pretty much fine now, he didn’t leave him- Bucky is not James Barnes or Winter Soldier, HE is a combination of the two and can survive on his own.

Steve isn’t dead, he’s still there if anyone wants to talk to him- he just old.

Steve has been told he can’t live without war but from all the fanfics we all write- we know that’s not true. He is always standing up for the little guy, if somebody has to do it, why not him? But I think there comes a time when he finally admitted to himself there’s enough heroes to pass the torch onto that he can move on.

He feels like he’s done his part- from the start Cap has always just wanted to to his part in the war and come home to settle down. Now, after being frozen and taking part in many battles, he has a way to go back to his life, of course he would go. It was torn from him once and he’d done his service to the country already.

He can’t fight forever- while we would like him to Steve still ages and his serum would eventually run out. That’s pretty much what you saw in the film when he came back older but smaller.

HE GOT A HAPPY ENDING - like honestly would you have rathered him go through 100+ years of fighting just to die without getting to see Peggy or have a life with her? It might not be the super awesome one you thought up with a girl from the future but we all knew Peggy was 4evs. 😂

TONY STARK:

Tony’s whole MCU arc was that we wanted to protect the world so he could keep the people he loved safe: e.g.- Ultron scene where he finds the avengers dead.

Once Tony had gotten rid of the ultimate threat, his story was pretty much done as Iron Man.

He lives on through Morgan, Pepper, Peter and the Avengers- theres still plenty of Iron Man left over, living as his legacy, what he left behind.

RDJ cannot play Iron Man forever, as much as we would love him to, time is relevant in our world.

Tony made the ultimate sacrifice but who else was going to? He knew the price and as we’ve seen in the past, he would always take the most dangerous job if it meant keeping his friends and family safe. i.e. wormhole in Avengers 1.

If anyone has more points to add, please feel free. :D x

#endgame #endgame spoilers #spoilers #Chris evans #captain america #bucky barnes #winter soldier #avengers #avengers endgame

58 notes · View notes

noah-andrews · 5 years

Text

Helping Hand- Willa & James

Participants: James Beiste (sw) and Willa Cohen-Chang (s)

Where: Campus and Town

Classes: Sub 102

Date Recorded: Friday 3/29/2019

Jamie was angry. It wasn't that the emotion was unknown to him. He was a Beiste after all. What was unusual was the level to which he was displaying that anger. In the end, though, you couldn't go into a scene with anger. That was asking for disaster. After a good talk with his brother and Nick he'd decided how to deal with his emotions and still make the scene safe and sane. He'd messaged Willa that he would be picking her up at her door at six am on the dot and that she needed to be ready to leave when he arrived. Seyella at his side and cane folded and neatly placed in his bag, Jamie checked the braille plate on the door and assured he was in the right place, knocked. As he waited he did a breathing exercise knowing he would need all of his patience today.

After her rough day and rougher night, Willa was beside herself. Only to make matters worse, Jamie wanted her up at the buttcrack of dawn for their final. She barely made it to the door in time when she heard him knock. She threw open the door, still slipping her shoes on. It was liekly he heard her scuffling and jumping around trying to get it on her foot, but finally she sighed and stood up. "This is a ridicuous hour to be awake."

He could hear her moving around inside. A louder thump, thump, thump hopping sound proceeded the door opening. The first words out of her mouth proved that she was in no better mood. "Indeed. I would sorely enjoy more time, but unfortunately it simply isn't feasible." He was forever jealous of people who could sleep to the last second, jump out of bed, and still make it to class on time. That would never be his life. He coughed and straightened up to his usual ramrod straight posture. "Alright. Here is how today will go. You will use my title as often as seems natural and appropriate. If I require it in a specific situation, I will inform you, otherwise assume the frequency is acceptable. You are to be my personal assistant for the day... from now until four this afternoon. You will do as I ask, help in any ways that you deem appropriate, and at the end of the day write or record your personal reflections on the scene. If you need to exit the scene at any time you will use your safeword. Please, give me your safewords and any and all limits so that we may begin."

"Until 4!?" she groaned semi-quietly, hating the idea that this was going to take an entire class day. "Safeword is cherry. Limits are scat, broken bones, death, and i think that's pretty much it." She took a minute to survey the situation, seeing the dog obediently by Jamie and the posture the boy had. She'd known about his condition, but wasn't sure she'd seen him so personally and up-close before. "If you have the dog, why do you need me?" she asked simply.

"Yes, 4." He reiterated without acknowledging her attitude. "I don't need you Ms. Cohen Chang. You serve me because you are a submissive and we are doing a service scene, but do not extrapolate that I need you. I function perfectly without anyone's help." He wasted no time handing her his bag. "Carry this. My cane is in the side pocket. I might need it in the classroom halls so acquaint yourself to it's location. Coffee first, then classes. We will need to hurry if you are to be on time for your own." He turned on his heels and with a soft command to Seyella to let her know they were walking started off. He didn't acknowledge her any further, leaving her to follow along. Whoever designed Lima's buildings hadn't given much or any thought to the needs of the disabled. Back when it was built there were 'special' institutes for the disabled and they were kept quite seperate. He's glad those days are in the past, but the past lingers. The stairs are too steep and the hallways a bit too narrow. Even with Sey at his side, he's jostled unexpected a couple of times just getting out of the submissive dorms. It was something he was used to and yet it took so much energy to always be on guard for these things. He was working all of the time.

"Stop saying that," she grumbled, "my name is Willa." Every time he said that, it felt like he was talking to her mother, whom she didn't like so the distaste was easy to track from there. "Fine, you don't need me," she said, taking the bag from him. She felt around it, looking around the pockets to discover the collapsed cane. With a soft huff, Willa followed suit, trailing behind Jamie as they slowly made their way to get some coffee.(edited)

Jamie huffed. "Were you raised by wolves? Grumbling was not required. A simple civil request to call you Willa would have sufficed." He shook his head, feeling the irritation returning. He pushed it away since he needed to focus on the pathway under his feet. Sey would either pull or gently nudge him to keep himself centered. He moved efficiently, or at least he felt as though it was efficient, but he knew of course that the people grumbling and striding past him would disagree. He let it all slide off him. It was the only way he could get through the day without frustration and embarrassment hanging over him like a heavy coat. As they neared the cafeteria they were halted by a gruff voice. It was a guard he wasn't familiar with. "Hey you can't take a dog in... Oh shit... oh... um yeah.. okay. Just... just make sure it behaves." Jamie had to really restrain himself from making a snide comment. The man had authority over him and deserved basic respect. It was an honest mistake he supposed. "Yes Sir. She's well trained. Have a pleasant day." With that out of the way, he pushed open the door. "Get me a dark roast coffee black one sugar, please." The please was unnecessary and probably unwise, but manners were important to him and couldn't be turned off. He pushed the button on the side of his watch and the electronic voice gave them the time. "Best hurry or you'll be late for class." He pulled money out of his pocket and handed it to her. "You may get yourself something just be quick about it."

Willa rolled her eyes, unsure of what the point of all this was or why she was being called out for being rude when he was being just as rude back. She was walking behind him, not thinking much of anything and just trying to get through the day. That's when she noticed how people were looking at Jamie, knowing he couldn't see it. It bothered her. She didn't even really know Jamie or have any connection to him to be bothered, but yet here she was. One person nearly ran into Jamie, then grunted as if it were Jamie's fault before his annoyed fact caught Willa's eye. It wasn't Jamie's fault, he was walking in pretty much a straight line and if anything the other guy coulda looked up from his phone like a decent human being. When they got up to the cafeteria door, Willa's head went up as the guard started to grumble. "Are you serious? The dog is so very clearly working right now and is allowed here. The dog will behave just fine," she growled as they started to walk passed, "Maybe it's me you need to worry about." Willa stood in front of Jamie as he started to dig in his pocket and took the money from him. She could notice the change in his face having to deal with what he clearly realized. "Thanks....Sir," she said quietly, moving to get the coffee and one for herself. When she returned she had remembered the watch going off. "I feel like your watch is not aware that there are no classes today," she said, putting the coffee against the back of Jamie's hand.(meh, i don't actually know if it's provided or not - i just let people say what they want lol)

Jamie had to breath in slowly through his nose and out through his mouth. It wasn't that he didn't appreciate where her words were coming from. She obviously had a very distinct and perhaps overly developed sense of justice... of right and wrong or perhaps more accurately.. fair and unfair. But the motivation for her surly words didn't negate the way they struck. "They are not part of this scene you are. I am concerned and responsible for you. Perhaps you would do well to focus on your own behavior and not worry about others." He waited for her to return and grinned to himself as he sipped the hot brew. He still couldn't believe how bad the coffee was, but it was growing on him. "Oh it is aware, as am I. There are no official classes but you still have somewhere to be." His grin didn't fade as he gave Sey her walk command. "My cane please. The sidewalk to the classrooms has become cracked after that frigid winter." He held out his hand and took the white cane and flicked his wrist to extend it. "Come along now." The walk to the classroom building was easier than to the cafeteria as there were no classes, but there was always the challenge of the heavy front doors. They were a heft today as always, but at least he didn't have Sey, his cane, and his bag. "We'll first walk to my usual first classroom 24 A and then upstairs to room 32." Once they'd made it all the way upstairs to their final destination, Jamie asked for his bag back. From it he produced the blindfold he and Nick used for sensory play. "I'm going to put this on you. Do not hesitate to safeword if you need to." He'd played with blindfolds enough to know people were often not prepared for the total darkness. He didn't even experience total darkness. He saw light interrupted by vague and shapeless shadow. "Are you alright?"

"But he was -" she cut herself off with a huff, "Fine. Sir." Willa sighed, sipping her coffee before pulling a gross face, "this stuff is so gross. We should have gone off campus for coffee. I mean, it still won't be as good at Seattle's but it's better than this swill." As Jamie explained his watch, willa gave a shrug as she conceded to his answer. She put her coffee down and went to Jamie's bag, getting out his cane and extending it, putting it in Jamie's hand. She groaned a little at how he spoke, "I'm not a dog, you know," she grumbled quietly, before realized he may have in fact been talking to the dog. She didn't understand why they were walking to classes they didn't have today, but regardless, she follow suit. "Wouldn't it make more sense to go to the classes you're going to have? Like, get a lay of the land, as it were?" she asked before handing Jamie his bag as requested. When she saw the blindfold, she felt herself get really nervous. "Ummm...why? Why do I need a blind fold, I thought I was supposed to be helping you."

It seemed like a win that not only did she halt her argument, but also that she used his title... though that might have been sarcastic. He didn't know her well enough to be able to tell. He tilted his head. "I apologize if I spoke to you thusly. I'm not... soft or conversational. You are acting as my assistant today and I just feel better giving simple, direct orders. I will attempt to do better." His goal for the day was to open her eyes to other perspectives, not to entrench her in her own. "Perhaps, but I have some plans on how to use the free day to my greatest benefit." He folded up his cane and nodded. "You will be aiding me in something very important. I'm going to lead you to the center of the room. Just stand for now while I turn on the recording I made of my switch class. I've been having issues keeping up and taking notes. I'm hoping you'll be able to think outside of the box I'm stuck in." He turned on the recording that Professor Leetch had helped him make of his Switch class. The bondage teacher was an amateur audio engineer and the speakers around them really gave a realistic experience. "Move around as you wish. I won't assist you with the desks and things unless you ask. I don't do this to be cruel, but in that particular classroom the desks are constantly being rearranged. I only want you to have all the information I do. I will be here, but silent for the next twenty minutes, but ask if you need help." The room was filled with the sounds of scraping chair legs, coughing, keyboard tapping, talking and also the teacher giving a lecture. He truly was hopeful she might have some ideas for him, but the point was for her to practice being inconvenienced without throwing a fit.

She listened as he spoke, semi-correcting himself and explaining. Willa just hummed as she didn't really have much to say about it and nodded, they quickly realizing that was a pointless gesture. She listened to his explanation of what was going on and what he seemed to need her help with. She still didn't understand how the blindfold was going to help or aide in what they were trying to do, but after a deep breath she put it on. "So you just want me to move around the room?" she asked, jumping a little as the tape started and she kept her hands out in front of her, trying to find her way around the desks and chairs that were collected in the room. "What exactly am I supposed to be figuring out here?"

"You don't have to move or if you want to move but need my help I'm happy to offer it." He sighed, using the command to release Seyella from work and moved closer to her. "As you can hear this class is a bit noisy. The teacher allows a more free and casual classroom environment, probably to great effect for most of the students. However it has left me... at loose ends. I miss moments of the lecture as he moves around and all of this chaos is going on around me. How would you approach it? Is there some way of listening, some where to sit, anything that will give me an optimal experience. I feel I might be so stuck in my box that I'm not thinking creatively. As someone who only now can't see perhaps you can come up with some new idea." He nodded to himself and then chuckled quietly before adding a caveat. "And that idea cannot include chastising, yelling at, or calling anyone names." He knew the part of the recording he remembered with a faint burn of embarrassment. *"Yes James? You have a question?" "Yes Sir. Can you list those sub to Dom transitional ideas again. I missed the last two." "They're on the board.... uhh..." There is a smattering of laughter. Not a lot, just a couple of people in realiy, but it still stings. "come see me after class and I'll help you with that." He can hear the embarrassed tension in his own voice as it sounded around him. "Yes Sir. Thank you." He doesn't know if it was a mistake leaving that in, afraid that he's done nothing but make himself see weak in Willa's eyes. The rest of his planned day will consist more traditional help and he wishes he had just stuck to that.

She opened her mouth to give a snarky retort to what she would do to solve this problem, though closed it abruptly as Jamie had clearly caught on to how WIlla reacted to things, which she whimpered quietly at. She took a deep breath as she listened to the sounds, taking very small steps to be able to somewhat navigate from where she was. She was trying to listen to the instructor's voice more than the stuff going on around her, but it was definitely difficult. She stuck her left arm out, "Is there a desk here, Sir? I think if I were closer to the instructor's voice, I could tune out the rest easier." But then Jamie's voice came from the audio, and Willa listened to the conversation unfold. She could feel herself getting annoyed at how the instructor seemed to just forget all about Jamie and - again - she was getting frustrated on his behalf. "Does he always talk to you like that? Or forget your exsistence? I mean, jesus you've been at this school how long and he can't fucking remember something as simple as who you are?"

"I'm not sure... " He flung out his cane and walked toward her voice. Sure enough there was a desk closer to the front of the classroom. "I've always been loathe to ask for special considerations, but you're correct. I think I will be able to more easily attune myself to the lecture if I'm closer to the source." He could tell that she had probably gotten the point he was trying to make and didn't see the sense in belaboring it. "Thank you for your assistance. You may take off the blindfold." He considered his answer as he walked back to Seyella and took her harness up to prepare her for work. "Yes... I suppose he does. He has many students. Think of all the people who have walked through the doors of this classroom... all the classrooms. I would not be so arrogant as to assume I'm anything special. This is his domain and I will do what I can to respect that." He composed himself and smiled. "I assure you that the rest of the day will a bit more sedate. Though I will continue to need your assistance. I have some homework to do so will need you to do a bit of tidying and then I will have you accompany me to work to do some filing. I sometimes forget to stop for meals so please do let me know when you require a break."

Willa slipped the blindfold off as Jamie allowed her too and let her eyes adjust to the light again. "Glad to help," she said, though not pacified by his answer. "Not the point. Whether you're arrogant or not or special or not, it shouldn't matter. I mean, you have a dog and a cane with you, there's no reason he shouldn't have it figured out by now and it's completely fucking rude." Her attitude was certainly back but not aimed at Jamie, the idea of having to deal with this from professionals made her completely crazy. "Alright, well, lead the way then, Sir."

He threw her a mirthless grin. "This is how the world is. I change what I can and accept what I can't." He shrugged as they left. "And above all I am ultimately in control of no one buy myself. My goal in life is to always look back and know that I have not reason for shame or regret. I don't care about him, he is unimportant. I care about myself and my own behavior." He nodded and led them back to his dorm. "The kitchen and the living room are in need of a bit of tidying. I will not order you about like a dog as you pointed out I was doing, however I would ask you to finish what chores you will without complaint while I attend to some emails." He released Sey from her work and got his laptop and set it up with the refreshable braille display. "Oh," he called over his shoulder, "Seyella is not working at the moment so feel free to interact however you wish."

"Well as if I didn't already know this is a stupid world," she grumbled and followed behind Jamie again. "Do you ever get tired of the knight in shining armor thing? Like, sometimes it's okay to be pissed you know, whether it's in your control or not," she added as they made it to Jamie's room. "Without complaint, huh?" she asked, looking over the two rooms he had pointed out. "Alright," she said quietly, working towards the kitchen and figuring she'd start there. She cleaned up the dishes and cleaned off the counters, moving then to sweeping up the floor. She continued her sweeping until she hit carpet, breaking out the vaccuum and working her way across the floor. After tidying up the objects on coffee tables and end tables she looked around and couldn't see anything else to do, so after letting Jamie know she was done, she bend down to scratch at Sey's neck.

"I'm no knight in shining armor. Simply not in my DNA, but I do try to be the best person I can be. I have not always behaved so and I don't like the feeling I get when I think about it." He chuckled. "I know complaining is a particular talent of yours, but I'm sure you'll survive for just a bit." His tone was gentle and kind, hoping she wouldn't take offense. He nodded and thanked her as he finished up his last email. He always felt a stab of guilt for messaging with Haydon, but same stab when he considered braking ties. He smiled hearing Sey's tags jingling. "She he loves when you scratch under her ears. She makes this funny little contented noise."

“Optimism only gets you so far,” she said soft and short in response. Hearing what Jamie suggested, Willa moves to the dogs ears, giggling softly as she immediately started giving the reaction Jamie described. “Oh yeah, look at that. Feels nice doesn’t it girl?”

Jamie knew that she wasn't wrong, but he also knew you never went wrong doing the right thing. Heclosed his laptop and smiled, hearing the lightness in Willa's voice. It was something he didn't know he'd hear at all. He let the two of them have some time as he stood and stretched, enjoying the pop in his spine. "Unfortunately it's time for us all to get back to work. Will you please pack up my laptop bag with the things here," he motioned to the laptop and the braille refreshable display, "and we'll head into town. I only work until three. Then you can help me with some shopping and then you'll be free of me." The time at work went quickly because an unexpected emergency had given him, and Willa by extension, plenty of work to do. It might have been a scene, but in the end he'd ended up really needing her help. By the time they were heading out he was pretty tired and ready to get home. "I just need some of the essentials. Especially coffee. I will most definitely be unhappy if I have to drink the swill they call coffee in the cafeteria." He turned down the road and into the corner bodega closest to campus. The aisles we're cramped and the owner was grumbling as he always did about the dog, but he just ignored it. "Please pick out a coffee while I grab the milk and some pasta sauce. The sooner we get home the happier we'll both be I suspect."

"Oh look at you pretty girl," she hummed as Sey got excited and scratched. She pouted slightly when she heard they were going to continue working, slightly hopeful she could just keep playing with Sey. With a sigh, Willa got up and got the bag, slipping his laptop into it along with the other things pointed out before slipping it over her shoulder. Willa followed Jamie around at work, mostly tyring to stay out of the way and barely knowing what she was doing. She did her best to follow Jamie's example and well as slipping him things when he seemed to struggle to find them. By the time they walked out, the deep breath she took was overly needed after the rushed few hours she'd just been through. "Coffee is perfect and completely necessary and bless you for not finding that cafeteria shit delicious," she said, following Jamie towards the corner store. Willa stayed behind Jamie because while Sey and Jamie navigated themselve quite well, a few things got moved on shelves and Willa pushed them back on. The grumbling made her grumble back, "Make your aisles wider then, Satchmo," giving the man her patented glaring stare and put some money down. "Two large coffees, one black, one with one sugar, and it should be strong enough to lift this whole building, so don't get skimpy on me," she ordered as Jamie walked away to grab the other stuff. "And, by the way, if you grumble at him again for something out of his control, I will come back here every single day and knock stuff off the shelves just to make you have to reset everything. So get me the coffees and shut our mouth," she growled. She didn't know how well it would go over, but the coffees were ready by the time Jamie got back.

"I am a terrible coffee snob, but one doesn't have to even be a connoisseur to recognize how truly awful that stuff is." As turned he heard the young woman give the man some sarcastic comment. She needed to learn that withou knowing who the hell that man was she had to err on the side of polite and respectful. What if he was a vindictive Dom? "Willa," Jamie chastised her lightly. "It's alright." This was life. She might not believe in optimism, but he was determined to show her a way of acceptance without compromising your own self respect. He came back to the counter and fished out his wallet and handed over his debit card. "Carry the grocery bag for me, please Willa." He commanded Sey and breathed in the aroma of his coffee. The walk back to campus was mostly quiet. Passing through the front gate he breathed in and out. "It is nearly four, but I hope you will be so kind as to help me carry my things back to my dorm. You've done very well today. I don't think I've cured you of any of your sarcastic, combative ways, but you did the scene very well and helped me with so much. I was wonderfully suprised at how well you helped at the office. I would have drowned without some help." Once they arrived at his place, he released Seyella and took the bag of groceries. "You can write you summary of your experience at your earliest convenience and email it to me." He thought for a moment. "Sey probaby could use some down time outside. Would you like to take her out for a while? Not as part of the scene. We're done with that... just if you'd like."

"You and me both, Sir," Willa agreed with gusto about the coffee. She was in the middle of glaring at the middle aged man when she heard Jamie's voice and closed her mouth. She paid for the coffees and took them as she returned to Jamie, switching one of the coffees for his grocery bags. "Yeah, I can do that. I have to go back that way anyway," Willa agreed with a nod. When Jamie continued with the compliments she was suddenly happy he couldn't see her blushing and getting a little nervous and not knowing what to do with her self since her hands were full. "Well...thanks," she said softly as they walked, her mind swirling a little bit. "A written experience?" she whined slightly but ultimately sighed, "Sure, Sir. SOunds...fun." But when he mentioned the scene was over she felt a little better, a little less like she had to watch everything she said and did - not that she was doing well at that in the first place. "Well, sure. That sounds nice. Thank you."

Jamie sighed. "Yes, a written summary. Nothing excessive. Just be honest please. I will be writing one as well. So that we can prove to the Heads that we learned something from this experience." He wasn't sure what he'd learned just yet, but he had the night to think about it. He smiled hearing some genuine excitement from Willa. "No thank you. She'll love it." He walked over to the sideboard and counted over three drawers and opened it to pull out he dog's 'non-working' leash with a holder for some poop bags attached to the handle. "There is a basket by the door with balls and toys for her if you'd like."

Willa was not happy about the writing assignment but as Jamie handed her the new leash she pepped up, taking a ball and a pull rope from the basket. "Alright, so we'll be back. Unless, are you coming too?" she asked, not entirely sure.

He hadn't planned on going with them, figuring that she would want to get away from at this point. However maybe he needed some 'down' time as much as his guide. "Umm... Yes... that would be nice." As they left his dorm room, he wasn't sure if the scene had been successful or not, but he didn't regret it and he didn't regret his own behavior so he'd take it as a win.

#gleedsmfinals #willa #jamie

1 note · View note

sosthemortalcoil · 6 years

Note

I just wanted to express my surprise over how popular Micheal is as a RO. I can't wrap my head around the fact that someone who thinks that he can do whatever he likes with Gabriel and things concerning Gabriel (hiding from us our AROF status, demanding constant connection on battlefield, trying to kill a kid that Gabriel took under their protection and that just the things showed in the demo) is so easly accepted, from my perspective this is the very definition of toxic relationship

First of all, I just want to say that’s perfectly fine! Honestly, I’d be a little worried if everyone liked Michael (especially since he was not designed to be an RO, for more or less these very reasons). Thank you for submitting your opinion.

However, I’d like to perhaps offer some insight into why others may enjoy him (again, not trying to say there’s anything wrong with disliking him–please do continue to dislike him and have different opinions!) Spoilery information below, so read at your own risk if at all interested.

1. First and foremost, this is a work of fiction. It’s a game, a bit of a fantasy, if you will. We do things and act in ways in game that we often would not in real-life–I certainly don’t go around smiting demons, for instance :D The distinction is an important one. In real life, someone who constantly yelled at me, seemed incapable of having a rational or civil conversation, and generally behaved like a thorn in my side I would avoid as much as possible. I certainly wouldn’t want a relationship with them. However, in a game like this, where I know in advance that the character has a different side and can change? That’s a different story. I wouldn’t trust anyone in real-life like this, but this is fiction. Two very different things. I also don’t smoke a pack a day and drink my liver away, but I have a soft-spot for playing characters with some serious vices too–trying to instill the same moral values I have in reality to my works of fiction wouldn’t translate well most of the time.

2. Hiding AROF status never sits well with Gabriel, even if they aren’t surprised about it. They are, rightfully, irritated that such information would be concealed from them. However, Michael is not alone in not telling Gabriel about AROF. For instance, Israfel knew and never told you. So, holding that against Michael and Michael alone isn’t necessarily fair.

3. Constant connection is almost a given with nestmates. Now, they might all be grown and archangels, but it can feel like missing a limb when you can’t sense one of them. Combine that with communication is necessary to keeping everyone safe, and Michael’s own worry about Gabriel’s safety, and it’s not entirely unreasonable for him to react the way he does. It’s technically a breach of protocol not to respond when being contacted, which is why both Michael and Israfel send a seraph to check on Gabriel.

4. Daniel is not a child to Michael. Whether or not you tried to kill Daniel or protect him, Michael had no way of knowing that you were given an order to protect the boy, and when he first realizes what the boy is, he’s under the assumption that you don’t know. General policy of heavy is to kill satanspawn on sight–he can’t imagine that you would have orders to protect the child. Does he ignore you when you tell him that Daniel is under your protection? Absolutely. But he can’t imagine that you would willingly and knowingly protect a creature of sin (as he understands the boy to be). He can’t wrap his head around the idea that God would give such an order, and defaults to his knee-jerk reaction. Is he in the wrong? 100%. But a character who is always right and perfect is boring. He also sees Daniel as a threat to Gabriel’s position–protecting a satanspawn with an AROF stamp seems like the perfect recipe for Falling–and that’s where his mind tends to stay.

5. I don’t know how much of Michael’s situation you know, as what we know in the game is not much. But there is a force instructing Michael what to do if he wants to keep Gabriel safe. He’s not allowed to tell Gabriel about certain things, which makes him irrational and irritated as he hates lying or concealing things from Gabriel. He’s supposed to do certain things ‘to keep Gabriel safe and prevent them from risking their position’ and when he fails at doing those thing, he’s hit with fear, worry, and terror–which we see expressed as more yelling. Not a great response, but there is a bit of a provocation for it. (Whether it’s justified or not I’ll leave to you–there’s not right or wrong answer)

6. Michael can change. If he can clear his chest of the guilt weighing it down and confide everything to Gabriel, we can see a healthier, almost naively sweet Michael. All Michael has ever wanted is Gabriel to be happy (albeit it, he wants them to be happy with him.) He can’t stand Gabriel seeming to become corrupt, true, and he will fight a dark!Gabriel if not manipulated because he views them as someone different from the nestmate he once knew. But whatever happens, Michael will always love Gabriel. Combine with the awkwardness he tends to favor in romantic situation, some people are excited for his romance. Is he for everyone? No. Is he going to be the smoothest romance? Again, no. But can I see why some people are anticipating the romance? Yes. Do I see why some people think he should be kept far away? Heck yes. Disagreeing over characters is great.

7. I think ‘easily’ accepted may be a bit of an issue. You could have tried to kill Daniel too, for one, which means you don’t have a whole lot of ground to stand on when chiding Michael for doing the same. And there will be discussions about what Michael has done wrong prior to any relationship. It’s not just kiss and make-up. It’s “Here’s where you really screwed up. Do you understand what you did wrong and can you promise to do better?” Two, you’ve been together for longer than humans have recorded history. Getting on each other’s nerves is a side-effect of coexisting for that long. Even Israfel needs his space from you sometimes.

Just want to finish with saying please don’t feel that I’m trying to say the only right way to see Michael is as a poor boy in need of some love. There is no right and wrong way. I’ve mentioned before you can end up killing him, and growing apart and wanting nothing to do with him is a perfectly healthy and legitimate response. But I can see both sides, and exploring different sides is part of the joy of a story like this.

#answers #author answer #Michael #Michael ro #Michael relationship

103 notes · View notes

tonystarktogo · 6 years

Note

honestly, it's been 2 years, still doing bitter sposts and still being bitter generally seem so ... petty (?) why being so stuck on 1 mcu movie? when there's now 19 of them? i think it's just sad to react like that

Huh. You know, in all honesty: I’m surprised you’re the first to comment on that. What surprised me even more is that I get this ask now? Is it because of those recent Wanda posts I did? I’m really curious because I haven’t done a lot of bitter stuff in a while, so the timing seems odd? But okay, for some reason you asked now and I’m answering. Here goes nothing:

1) Let’s start with the obvious one, shall we? Being bitter – if done in a specific context and in moderation – is fun. Come on, I’m sure you’ve noticed all the gossiping people love so much. All those times your best friend complained about their boss again. We like being bitter. We get enjoyment out of having arguments and discussing something we’re passionate about. We like sharing things that bother or annoy us.

I complain about the given temperature every day of the year. I complain about rain – but I complain about it being too hot to. I complain about cigarette smoke and my train being late and I complain about the way MCU handled CW. Because I can. Because I like to.

2) Yes, it’s been two years. So what? Tony being bitter and getting over Team Cap is like any other recurring trope in fanfics. It’s a certain plot I enjoy, again and again. Just like I love Enemies to lovers or Team as a family and many, many other tropes out there. I read them again and again, and I write them again and again. Because the exact wording might differ, but the underlying plot remains the same and I love it. How long it’s been since CW came out has nothing to do with it. I’ve liked Team as a family since the Avengers came out. I repeat: So what?

3) Why is it this specific MCU movie that matters so much? Well, for starters because it’s the last in my Tony Stark canon time line. When it comes to the Avengers as a whole, CW is the last status update we’ve had. There is no team anymore. That’s canon right now. Yes, there’s Infinity Wars but I HAVEN’T SEEN THAT MOVIE YET. No spoilers please. It came out two days ago, I haven’t had the time to watch it.

So why wouldn’t CW still have a major influence on everything I write? Like Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows is still a major influence in how I talk about Harry Potter, even when I’m discussing something concerning the first book. It’s a part of the canon world. Why should I forget about it?

4) I am petty. I like to think that this is not the only thing I am, or even the characteristic that defines me the most, but I’m not some perfect, generous, all-loving being full of forgiveness and baby kittens. I can be mean, I can be bitchy, I can hurt other people’s feelings whether I mean to or not. And I absolutely can be petty. But considering this particular pettiness is directed at fictional characters and I’m well-aware of it, I don’t think it’s much of a problem. Feel free to disagree.

5) You think this is sad? A dead baby seal is sad. People still not having enough food and water to survive is sad. Running out of coffee is sad. But seriously? My bitterness about CW is not sad. Because I don’t let that bitterness consume me. And I honestly don’t know how I ever came you the impression that I do.

Yes, I write bitter posts. I also write everything is beautiful and nothing hurts posts. I write angst and fluff and bitch please I’m amazing BAMF ass-kicking and humour. If anything the bitter content has steadily lessened. I don’t even do regular bitter sundays anymore. And why? Because I don’t feel like being bitter all the time. That’s why. Because I do a lot of stuff that’s everything but bitter. My life doesn’t revolve around bemoaning CW. It doesn’t even revolve around Tony Stark, no matter how much I love the character.

6) I’m not stuck on anything. CW is a part of the verse I enjoy, and it’s a part I acknowledge. But it’s not all there is to MCU, and I don’t treat it as such. As proven by my 300 something unfinished AUs and ‘verses that disregard canon completely, focus on the MIT-era or the Avengers time, and so on, and so on.

7) Just in case my occasional digs against Steve Rogers are the reason for your ‘concern’, rest assured: I didn’t like Steve Rogers long before CW came out. CW was merely the reason why my disinterest turned into dislike, nothing more. I have many reasons for that, but considering the length of this post I won’t delve into them now. (And no, I have no problem with other people liking Steve. As long as we mutually respect our stances, we’re all good. It’s not that hard.)

Bottom line: Civil War is not a personal tragedy or an obstacle I have to overcome. It’s not an insult I have to forgive. It’s part of the canon MCU, and contains important developments of and experiences for Tony Stark, and as such it has a place on my blog, just like anything else pertaining Tony Stark.

You don’t have to like that. You don’t have to agree with my stance. You don’t have to read the content I write. You can block any bitter posts, they always contain the hashtags #bitter Sunday or #bitter. Or you can just block me, if you’d prefer.

But please – at the risk of sounding petty, as mentioned under point number 4 – save your judgement and your sadness for a worthwhile cause. I and my occasional bitterness don’t need it.

We’re perfectly fine and very happy. Together and apart.

#ReRe is petty #bitter #i can't believe we're arguing about 'letting go' of CW now #but okay apparently we are #personal opinion #i don't even know if i should use any warnings #leave my bitterness alone damn it #Anonymous #ReRe answers

91 notes · View notes

franeridart · 7 years

Note

I mean, the idea is nice, but I don't think Bakugou and Todoroki are friends? I mean, at most I think the tolerate each other, I don't think they really enjoy each other presence

I admit to my laziness-driven mistake, more than “friendship” I should have said “relationship that’s definitely a friendship but neither of the involved parts seems to have realized just yet”. Friendship was just shorter, tho

I dunno if you follow the manga, but Bakugou and Todoroki are definitely on friendly terms - since the beginning of the training camp arc you hardly ever see one without the other around, and no interaction since has had them actually fighting. Most of their scenes together are made of Bakugou being the usual shit he likes to be and Todoroki using the occasion to master his sass skills, that’s true, but I wouldn’t say that changes the fact that they coexist in a definitely peaceful way (as far as the word peaceful can be used to describe Bakugou, of course) - they make fun of each other with minimal recoil, can fight as a team seamlessly, actually listen to one another even when they don’t agree, while some might argue that it was only to make up for a personal failure Todoroki was, with Kirishima, the one to propose the rescue plan, and in most recent times Todoroki has been treating Bakugou exactly as he would any other friend (and if the way Bakugou acts with Sero and Kaminari is anything to go by, he’s been treating Todoroki as a friend too, I’d say)

Someone in the tags mentioned that Todoroki would probably be more annoyed with Bakugou, but I gotta disagree there too - the fun thing about these two’s relationship is exactly that they’re (literally) like fire and ice. Bakugou yells and insults as he does, Todoroki answers as if they’re having a perfectly civil conversation - it’s super amusing to me? It’s why I love that relationship a lot haha I wouldn’t put Todoroki between Bakugou’s group or Bakugou in Todoroki’s, that’s for sure, but they do have a friendly rivalry going on. Compared to the relationships they both have with a big part of the class, I’d say that the one they share is closer to a friendship than anything else.

(of course from there to having them just chill and talk is a leap, but considering how similar they are in their different types of social awkwardness, I don’t think it’s too farfetched? well, I’ve had Bakugou chill with Jirou and they hardly ever interacted, this was definitely closer to canon than that lol)

Anon said:Bruhh like, the episode this week killed me, but seeing your update with bakugou and deku sparring just threw me over the edge- I WANT THEM TO TALK AND BE FRIENDS ALREADY! LIKE OMFG I NEED MORE DEVELOPEMENT SO THEY CAN HAVE A HEALTHY AND STABLE FRIENDSHIP/RIVALRY. (Like I know the pacing is actually fine and that the narrative is leading to this, but I’m so impatient sometimes) At least you have filled some of the void these two have left in my heart. Beautiful work as always

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I dunno if you’re up to date with the manga, but as far as healthy rivalry goes I’d say we’re there, anon! I’m sure next time they’ll properly interact there’ll be a noticeable shift in the mood! Now, if only Horikoshi had them interact already…………. SIGH

Anon said:your art brighten my life a bit

;O; I’m glad!!! Thank you!!!!

Anon said:me @ the manga: more! baku & mina! interactions! btw your art today (and always lmao) was A++++ so cute also i live for todo and baku friendship

!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And yeah Bakugou doesn’t seem to interact much with the girls in the class, does he? #sob tho Mina’s def the one that engages with him the most! And that makes me happy!!!! I hope we’ll get to see more of them in the future aaaaahhhhhhhhh orz

Anon said:uwaah i love the way you draw todoroki so much! i loved the platonic todobaku art too (i may or may not ship them.. just putting that out there). you have this talent for portraying relationships between characters so well?! i love the way you have them interact in all your art (i’m a huge fan of the bokuroteru art for the same reasons !!!!!!), i can’t wait to see what you post next!

AAAHHHHHHHHHHH THANK YOU!!!!!!!! Baku and Todo have a delicate balance in their relationship I was definitely scared to get wrong, but I’m happy you liked how I went about it!!!!

Anon said:SHINSON HAS KITTENS VERYWHERE MY SMUGGLER KITTER BOY

What if I told you that those are actually his cats and he isn’t smuggling anything, tho 👀👀👀👀

Anon said:your Shinsou keeps giving me life bless your soul and your cow

;O; thank you!!!! I’m glad you liked him!!!!!!!!!! My cow is very grateful too lol

Anon said:I’m in love with all of your bakushima art yessss

And I am in love with you loving it, anon!!!!

Anon said:fran, do you watch Voltron ? i want to watch it but i don’t know what to start with. Is there a difference between Voltron : Legendary Defender and Voltron ? can i just start watching from Voltron Legendary Defender ? Thanks for your help.

I’ve watched the first season lmao one day… I’ll catch up to it…… anyway Legedary Defenders is a reboot, so you don’t need to wacth anything else unless you want to! It’s a standalone~

Anon said:I only have tumblr to view your art tbh,, I love your BakuKiriKami so much o h m y go D

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! what a compliment oh my god ;O; thank you so much!!!

Anon said:Fran, i had a thought. You know how people say Bakugou quirk is villainous , don’t you think Monoma quirk pretty villainous too ? like he can copy other people quirk and maybe he can still use the past quirk that he’s already copy. Like it’s really hard too fight the person with same power don’t you think ?

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm people don’t think that Bakugou’s quirk is villainous, tho? They think his personality is, not his quirk - as of now the only quirk that’s considered villainous by the canon is Shinsou’s! And that’s only by kids, too - pro heroes saw him and decided he would make a perfect hero! Anyway, as far as Monoma goes I don’t think he’d be considerable villainous, both for quirk and personality - he’s a weird kid, but Horikoshi did say he’s a nice one. Kids might have used to find his quirk annoying or unfair, but villainous is a bit too harsh of a word? Well, he seems to be well integrated in class 1B, so even if he used to have that sort of problem he for sure doesn’t now haha

Anon said:ASHGHGFK I love your oc’s in that most recent picture, can we hear more about them please?

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! if you ask me questions about them I’ll be more than happy to answer them!!!!!!! :O

Anon said:hi fran!!! i do really admire your draws bc your style is so cute and unique, espescially when you come with the kiribakus x3 anyway, about the new bnha episodes, do you have any opinion about dabi??

Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!! anddddddd not yet, actually? All I can say about him is that I love his design and that he seems really promising and interesting, also seems to have a brain which, A+, but as of now he hasn’t done enough for me to have a proper opinion about him! The only league of villains members I have an opinion about are Toga and Twice, actually haha

#fran answers #fun fact! i wasn't kidding when i said i love todo and bakus relationship #not in a 'what could be' way #i mean as it is right this moment #how it was and how it evolved and how it became #every interaction they have is gold to me #todoroki is one of the characters that knows best how to interact with bakugou #and i dont even think he does it purposefully it's just how he naturally is #they don't mix AT ALL but in this specific case #it ends up meaning that they can coexist without much problems #which is great!#while the squad rolls with bakugou's moods and enhances them #turns them into fun times and pushes back when bakugou goes too far #while the squad actively BETTERS bakugou while egging him on and making him MORE #todoroki is the ice wall to meet bakugou's outbursts #i don't think they necessarily better each other #i hardly think they /care/ for each others emotional wellbeing at the moment #but they can withstand each other and they can be themselves with each other #they don't try to make each other better but they don't try to change each other either #i guess you might say it's a standstill #but it makes for a different sort of openess and authenticity in their interactions #it gives off a really comfortable vibe #well #ive tried to explain why i love that relationship as much as i do many many times and i never quite managed to #so i can't make it any clearer than this #but i enjoy them #i hope i'll see more of them in the near future #*nudges horikoshi* /bring bakugou back already you fiend/#anonymous

224 notes · View notes

johnmauldin · 7 years

Text

Mauldin: 7 Forecasts from the Brightest Financial Minds I Know

In my fairly upbeat 2018 forecast, I predicted that the US economy and markets will probably hold up well, thanks to tax cuts and deregulation. That’s, of course, assuming the Federal Reserve gets no more hawkish than it already has.

Continuing my series of forecasts, here I’ll look at predictions from some of my most trusted friends and colleagues (subscribe to Thoughts from the Frontline to receive all my forecasts). Some disagree with my own views—and that’s perfectly fine. I want you to see all sides so you can make good decisions for your own family and portfolio.

I’ll let these forecasters speak for themselves in longer quotes than I usually allow, then add my own comments.

The article runs long, but I’m sure you’ll take away a lot from it, so bear with me…

Ben Hunt: No Algorithm Can Predict the Future

Let’s start not with a forecast but with an important story about forecasts from Ben Hunt.

Ben’s wide-ranging essays are hard to summarize or excerpt in a way that captures their breadth and depth.

I’ll give you a tiny snippet, but please, set aside some time this month to read the entire article. It is long but worth your while.

The Three-Body Problem is a famous example of a system which has no derivative pattern with any predictive power, no applicable algorithm that a human could discover to adapt successfully and turn basis uncertainty into basis risk. In the lingo, there is no “general closed-form solution” to the Three-Body Problem. (It’s also the title of the best science fiction book I’ve read in the past 20 years, by Cixin Liu. Truly a masterpiece. Life and perspective-changing, in fact, both in its depiction of China and its depiction of the game theory of civilization.)

What is the “problem”? Imagine three massive objects in space … stars, planets, something like that. They’re in the same system, meaning that they can’t entirely escape each other’s gravitational pull. You know the position, mass, speed, and direction of travel for each of the objects. You know how gravity works, so you know precisely how each object is acting on the other two objects. Now predict for me, using a formula, where the objects will be at some point in the future.

Answer: You can’t. In 1887, Henri Poincaré proved that the motion of the three objects, with the exception of a few special starting cases, is non-repeating. This is a chaotic system, meaning that the historical pattern of object positions has ZERO predictive power in figuring out where these objects will be in the future. There is no algorithm that a human can possibly discover to solve this problem. It does not exist.

And that of course is the basic problem we have in economics and investing. When we say that past performance is not indicative of future results, that aphorism is more than just legalese.

Such ideas can easily discourage us from even thinking about the future. However, the real answer is to think about the future differently.

With that prelude, let’s move on.

Anatole Kaletsky: Inflation and Bond Yields Will Accelerate

If I had to rank economic forecasting groups (as opposed to individuals) for consistent quality, Gavekal would be high on the list.

Here are just a few Gavekal snippets from the opening week of 2018. We’ll start with Anatole Kaletsky, who zooms in on inflation as this year’s key unknown factor.

Will inflation accelerate in the US, but not in other major economies? I think the answer is “Yes”, for the same reasons as above. However, I also expected inflation to accelerate and bond yields to increase last year. Instead, both inflation and growth ended the year exactly where they were.

The simple answer is that US unemployment is now 4.1% instead of 4.8%. I was wrong about 5% unemployment being a non-inflationary growth limit, and maybe 4% isn’t either. But whatever the exact number may be, the US is certainly closer to its non-inflationary growth limit now than it was a year ago. In addition, the Trump tax cuts, if they actually stimulate higher US consumption and/or investment (which they may not do by any meaningful amount) will add to US inflationary pressures, since new production capacity will take several years to boost non-inflationary trend growth.

If the prediction of higher US inflation turns out to be right, it will be a game-changer. It will produce much more volatile market conditions and even greater under-performance by US equities and bonds relative to assets in Europe and Japan, where inflation is not a risk.

The follow-on question, if Anatole is right about inflation, is how the Fed will respond to it. The ideal response would have been to start tightening about three years ago. That opportunity having past, the remaining choices are all varying degrees of bad.

Louis Gave: Financials and Energy Will Be Top Sectors This Year

Now let’s move on to Louis Gave, who gives us some stock market ideas at the end of a long, thoughtful essay on liquidity.

Putting it all together, 2018 does seem to be starting on a different note than 2017. While the bull market may not be in peril, it is a tough environment for a price/earnings ratio expansion to occur. Such an outcome usually relies on excess liquidity moving into equities. Yet in 2018, equity markets are more likely to be a source of liquid funds than a destination for them. It follows that if a multiple-expansion is off the table then equity gains will rely on earnings rising. The area where such an improved profit picture is likely is financials (higher rates and velocity) and energy (higher prices). The fact that both of these sectors presently trade on low multiples also helps.

If you want specific sector ideas, there are two good ones.

David Kotok: A Shift Upward Will Continue

My friend David Kotok of Cumberland Advisors had some New Year’s Day thoughts on the Republican tax bill’s impact.

Once the transitional shock of yearend is absorbed, we think the tax bill will raise the valuation of US stocks. Simply put, the tax bill will generate a permanent shift upward of somewhere between $10 and $14 in the threshold of S&P 500 earnings. Once you adjust for that permanent shift, you may continue to factor in the earnings growth rate that you expect from a US economy that is going to grow at 3% instead of 2%. We believe that growth rate is likely for a couple of years.

So, S&P 500 earnings should range up to and then above $150 by the decade’s end. They will do so while the Fed is still engaged in a gradualist restoration of interest rates to something more “normal,” whatever that word means. And those earnings will occur while a repatriation effect is unleashing $1 trillion of stagnant cash in some form of robust redistribution (dividends or stock buybacks) or as productivity-enhancing capex spending. Bottom line is no recession in sight for at least a few years; and low inflation remains, so interest-rate rises will not derail the economic recovery, nor will they alter rising stock market valuations.

Years ago we projected a 3000 level on the S&P 500 Index by 2020.

That is considerably more bullish than most 2018 forecasts I’ve seen. Rather than argue with David, I’ll say this: Be ready for anything this year. The future is no more uncertain than it always is, but the consequences of a mistake are growing as the bull market and economic expansion grow long in the tooth.

They will end at some point. That means you need a strategy that will let you both participate on the upside and defend yourself when the bear appears. I reiterate that you should be diversifying trading strategies, not just asset classes.

Paul Krugman: Rising Rates Spell Trouble

Next we turn to Paul Krugman, who is not generally one of my favorite economists. I quote him this time because he sounds a lot like, well, me.

So we’re living in an era of political turmoil and economic calm. Can it last?

My answer is that it probably can’t, because the return to normalcy is fragile. Sooner or later, something will go wrong, and we’re very poorly placed to respond when it does. But I can’t tell you what that something will be, or when it will happen.

The key point is that while the major advanced economies are currently doing more or less OK, they’re doing so thanks to very low interest rates by historical standards. That’s not a critique of central bankers. All indications are that for whatever reason — probably low population growth and weak productivity performance — our economies need those low, low rates to achieve anything like full employment. And this in turn means that it would be a terrible, recession-creating mistake to “normalize” rates by raising them to historical levels.

But given that rates are already so low when things are pretty good, it will be hard for central bankers to mount an effective response if and when something not so good happens. What if something goes wrong in China, or a second Iranian revolution disrupts oil supplies, or it turns out that tech stocks really are in a 1999ish bubble? Or what if Bitcoin actually starts to have some systemic importance before everyone realizes it’s nonsense?

That was from Krugman’s January 1 New York Times column, and his assessment is not far from my own view.

The difference between us is that Krugman has made a remarkable turnaround since the imminent doom he predicted right after the election. So I’m glad to welcome his Damascene conversion.

I hope it sticks this time.

David Rosenberg: We Are 90% Through This Cycle

I don’t know any economic forecaster more prolific than David Rosenberg. I don’t know how he even finds time to sleep, frankly. His Breakfast with Dave is often the same length as my weekly letters, and he writes it every working day.

Dave’s December 29 issue of Breakfast with Dave was a tour de force on world markets, which I can’t possibly summarize and do any justice to the original, so I’ll cut straight to his conclusion.

In other words, expect a year where volatility re-emerges as an investable theme, after spending much of 2017 so dormant that you have to go back to the mid-1960s to find the last annual period of such an eerie calm – look for some mean reversion on this file in the coming year. This actually would be a good thing in terms of opening up some buying opportunities, but taking advantage of these opportunities will require having some dry powder on hand.

In terms of our highest conviction calls, given that we are coming off the 101 month anniversary of this economic cycle, the third longest ever and almost double what is normal, it is safe to say that we are pretty late in the game. The question is just how late. We did some research looking at an array of market and macro variables and concluded that we are about 90% through, which means we are somewhere past the 7th inning stretch in baseball parlance but not yet at the bottom of the 9th. The high-conviction message here is that we have entered a phase of the cycle in which one should be very mindful of risk, bolstering the quality of the portfolio, and focusing on strong balance sheets, minimal refinancing risk and companies with high earnings visibility and predictability, and low correlations to U.S. GDP. In other words, the exact opposite of how to be positioned in the early innings of the cycle where it is perfectly appropriate to be extremely pro-cyclical.

So it’s either about investing around late-cycle thematics in North America or it is about heading to other geographies that are closer to mid-cycle — and that would include Europe, segments of the Emerging Market space where the fundamentals have really improved, and also Japan. These markets are not only mid-cycle, and as such have a longer runway for growth, but also trade relatively inexpensively in a world where value is scarce.

Dave gives us some geographic focus, and it’s mostly outside the US and Canada. He likes Europe, Japan, and some emerging market countries because they are earlier in the cycle.

He’s certainly right on that point, though I think we may differ on how long the cycle can persist. The past doesn’t predict the future.

For the record, in my own portfolio design, we are about 50% non-US equities. My managers are finding lots of opportunities outside of the US.

Byron Wien: “Ten Surprises” List

We’ll wrap up today with an annual tradition: Byron Wien’s annual “Ten Surprises” list.

It always causes me a little cognitive dissonance because by definition you can’t “expect” a surprise. That aside, Byron’s list is always a useful thought exercise. Here it is.

1. China finally decides that a nuclear capability in the hands of an unpredictable leader on its border is not tolerable even though North Korea is a communist buffer between itself and democratic South Korea. China cuts off all fuel and food shipments to North Korea, which agrees to suspend its nuclear development program but not give up its current weapons arsenal.

2. Populism, tribalism and anarchy spread around the world. In the United Kingdom Jeremy Corbyn becomes the next Prime Minister. In spite of repressive action by the Spanish government, Catalonia remains turbulent. Despite the adverse economic consequences of the Brexit vote, the unintended positive consequence is that it brings continental Europe closer together with more economic cooperation and faster growth.

3. The dollar finally comes to life. Real growth exceeds 3% in the United States, which, coupled with the implementation of some components of the Trump pro-business agenda, renews investor interest in owning dollar-denominated assets, and the euro drops to 1.10 and the yen to 120 against the dollar. Repatriation of foreign profits held abroad by U.S. companies helps.

4. The U.S. economy has a better year than 2017, but speculation reaches an extreme and ultimately the S&P 500 has a 10% correction. The index drops toward 2300, partly because of higher interest rates, but ends the year above 3000 since earnings continue to expand and economic growth heads toward 4%.

5. The price of West Texas Intermediate Crude moves above $80. The price rises because of continued world growth and unexpected demand from developing markets, together with disappointing hydraulic fracking production, diminished inventories, OPEC discipline and only modest production increases from Russia, Nigeria, Venezuela, Iraq and Iran.

6. Inflation becomes an issue of concern. Continued world GDP growth puts pressure on commodity prices. Tight labor markets in the industrialized countries create wage increases. In the United States, average hourly earnings gains approach 4% and the Consumer Price Index pushes above 3%.

7. With higher inflation, interest rates begin to rise. The Federal Reserve increases short-term rates four times in 2018 and the 10-year U.S. Treasury yield moves toward 4%, but the Fed shrinks its balance sheet only modestly because of the potential impact on the financial markets. High yield spreads widen, causing concern in the equity market.

8. Both NAFTA and the Iran agreement endure in spite of Trump railing against them. Too many American jobs would be lost if NAFTA ended, and our allies universally support continuing the Iran agreement. Trump begins to think that not signing on to the Trans-Pacific Partnership was a mistake as he sees the rise of China’s influence around the world. He presses for more bilateral trade deals in Asia.

9. The Republicans lose control of both the Senate and the House of Representatives in the November election. Voters feel disappointed that many promises made during Trump’s presidential campaign were not implemented in legislation and there is a growing negative reaction to his endless Tweets. The mid-term election turns out to be a referendum on the Trump Presidency.

10. Xi Jinping, having broadened his authority at the 19th Party Congress in October, focuses on China’s credit problems and decides to limit business borrowing even if it means slowing the economy down and creating fewer jobs. Real GDP growth drops to 5.5%, with only minor implications for world growth. Xi proclaims this move will ensure the sustainability of China’s growth over the long term.

(https://www.blackstone.com/media/press-releases/byron-wien-announces-ten-surprises-for-2018)

Whatever your predisposition, there’s plenty to both like and dislike in there. On #7, I think 10-year Treasury bonds at 4% or more will look like the end of the world to younger folks.

It’s been more than a decade since we saw any such thing, and at that point they were falling, not rising. But if he’s correct that CPI pushes over 3%, then bond yields have to rise.

Personally, I think I would take the other side of that bet. I think the yield on the 10-year actually has a chance to fall.

On another note: If Byron is right that “speculation reaches an extreme,” the resulting correction will be a lot deeper than 10%. I don’t think we are there yet and probably won’t reach that point in 2018. But we will get there eventually.

All right, my stack of New Year’s predictions is barely any smaller, but we’ll stop here and pick up next week in Thoughts from the Frontline.

Join hundreds of thousands of other readers of Thoughts from the Frontline

Sharp macroeconomic analysis, big market calls, and shrewd predictions are all in a week’s work for visionary thinker and acclaimed financial expert John Mauldin. Since 2001, investors have turned to his Thoughts from the Frontline to be informed about what’s really going on in the economy. Join hundreds of thousands of readers, and get it free in your inbox every week.

#2018 #economy #forecast

5 notes · View notes

toycarousel · 7 years

Note

Uh.. hi.. I'm not sure if I should come to you for this but.. my friend is very persistent that I should 'rebel' against my dad because from what they know, he's pretty bad. He makes me self conscious about myself.. but I don't believe he intends it.. he calls my trans guy friend "she or he or whatever" instead of just saying he. He doesn't know that I'm nonbinary and actually very afraid to come out because of that. He is a rape apologist saying that "it's hard for guys to control that" (1/?)

there's other things he does, and I just don't know what to do. Should I rebel like my friend says? I'm scared to because I have an older sister and my dad and her arguing really scarred me and I don't want that for my little brother. Should I just keep holding out until my brother is a bit older or what? Please, I need help. (2/2)

Hi there, Anon! It’s perfectly fine to come to me with this topic, and I’ll do my best to respond according to my opinion/perspective! If any of these statements seem untrue or inappropriate to your specific feelings/situation, then don’t just take my advice!!! It’s good to gather multiple opinions, and think deeply about your own beliefs (it’s okay to trust yourself as well as your friends, and take everything into account -- even when perspectives contradict each other, and even when your own feelings contradict each other -- that’s completely normal, and this is a complex set of circumstances, so be kind to yourself...)

A question that sprang to my mind -- and it’s one you probably know a lot more about than I do, since you’ve spoken to your friend -- is what does your friend mean by “rebel?” Depending on how militant your father is regarding his beliefs (and it sounds like he’s very, very stubborn about maintaining them, since he argued with your sister so intensely), it might be safe to rebel in certain ways, but not others. It’s extremely kindhearted and thoughtful for you to be thinking of how arguments like the ones you were made to witness could affect your little brother.

Rebelling can look like verbal disagreements, ex; your dad says something wholly untrue like “men just can’t control themselves sometimes,” (which is not true; rapists can’t control themselves, and regardless of gender or impulses, being a rapist is not okay and never will be okay) and you respond by politely stating “I don’t agree, because I believe...xyz,” could be a verbal form of rebelling. And, as I mentioned, if something even that gentle and civil would make him angry enough to argue with you the way he argued with your sister, then he is very militant about his opinions (they are likely grounded in extreme versions of pride and egoism on his part), and it may not be safe for you to disagree with him openly.

You can also rebel by disagreeing with him through not speaking at all. This might be safer, if you want to avoid having arguments with your dad that could cause your sibling and yourself harm. When he says something ignorant, or misgenders your friend, you could go completely silent, and just look at him blankly. Or you could walk away. This makes it clear that you do not share his opinion, but since you didn’t outright say it, it may not start a full-blown fight (unless he’s the type of guy who, when he doesn’t receive validation for his opinions, is likely to harass you if you walk away or stay silent).

Then there are more blatant forms of rebelling, like working toward moving out, and telling him exactly why you’re doing so, or like straightforwardly calling him out on his behaviour (this can be done politely or not; the difference between stating a contradictory opinion and calling someone out, is usually that, this time, you’re flat-out telling him that he is wrong, his beliefs cause harm to others, and here is why: “xyz...”) It sounds like these options are far more likely to set him off -- so at that point, you should follow your own morals, but only within the parameters of safety! Rebelling sometimes isn’t an option at the time, if it will cause an unsafe home environment for you and your younger brother. That doesn’t mean there won’t be a time in your life when you can absolutely call him out (like when you’re older and/or live on your own).

I will say this though, it’s important to think about what sorts of messages your little brother is absorbing from your dad. He’s young, and he’s very likely to take his dad’s word for things -- and if he never sees anyone close to him who disagrees with your dad, then he may grow up having to unpack a whole lot of damage caused by your dad, or he may grow up to be just like your dad.

You don’t have to feel like you’re betraying your brother by not fighting with your dad, though. Your concerns about the fighting, and about everyone’s emotional safety are completely valid!!!!! If it were me (and here’s just my 2 cents, if you think it could lead to a worse environment in the home, then be careful about how you go about it) I would wait until your brother is either out of the house at the time to disagree with your dad, and I’d do it in a polite way. I’d quietly nod and walk away if it looked like an explosion was about to come from my dad, and I’d spend more and more time with my brother (alone, bonding time) wherein I share my own perspectives and knowledge with him -- that way, at least he’s getting more than one side of various important topics!

In any case, you can send me more messages if you have more questions, or just want to talk/vent~! Or if you’d like some resources... you are always welcome here, and I hope that some of what I’ve stated here is helpful or reassuring, but I know that this is an incredibly difficult situation for you to be in -- it’s not fair that you’re being placed in this position. I hope things change soon, but in the meantime, accumulate the positives (like spending time with your brother and challenging the beliefs your father may have instilled in him, as well as just bonding with him and being a positive sibling~! You sound like an excellent one already~!!!)

Stay safe, Anon!!!

#fathers #father's day #dads #family #trauma #rape apologism -#misgendering -#anonymous #scotchasks

6 notes · View notes