#at this point i think some of yall can guess what my trauma is but im not saying for personal reasons to please dont <3

[crunchycrystals]

we are okay really stabbed me through the chest with the line "even the good places are haunted"

[jordanraye47]

Team e-scope headcanons

Eva unintentionally dresses like a f-boy. Like with all those gym clothes someone will confuse her with some mf named jason or Lucas.

Also she most definitely had short hair. Like a pixie cut or smth. Goes along with the f-boy thing.

Despite how much Noah reads, he can go to a bookstore store, buy 8 books and read like 2 of them before deciding that it’s time for a new trip.

Speaking of bookstores. Noah has taken izzy to a bookstore with him. He has never seen her read a book, or anything in fact. But it ended with her trying to recommend him books rather than her taking any books for herself.

And it’s the most random ass books known to man. She’ll come up to him and it’s like a book of algebra formulas and say like ‘did you know that i read this in middle school, yeah, it was really boring though. Except the introduction, i read that multiple times.’ idk she’s a weird girl.

Speaking of izzy. This girl can not tan for the life of her. Like she can live in spain or whatever (i think she’s scottish) and only get this absurd amount of freckles. (i will reblog with a pic cause i can’t add it here for some reason [it will be the end of me i swear tumblr hates me])

Izzy js like ‘turns off’ at some points. Like not passes out, she js goes completely quiet and acts completely normal and calm for like an hour and it creeps everyone out.

She also said in total drama that she had psychosis in the total drama after math. And psychosis is a trauma developed disorder (taught from my physiologist) but literally no one knows what it came from. Like not even herself, it just came at one point according to her.

Noah definitely lets his hair grow out, mostly because without noticing himself. It’s usually his mom who cuts it but she practically drags his hair out of his scalp when she does so he tires to avoid that. Resulting in him having long ass hair. Like not as in pony tail hair but we’ve all seen his hair on total drama.

Izzy has gone to the gym with eva before (i’m a evzy shipper leave me alone😔) but izzy does nothing but just walk around and use whatever she finds for her whatever she wants. Like she definitely somehow found monkey bars out of nowhere. (And she’s strong as fuck, we’ve seen her on TDWT she’s strong. But nobody knows how she exercises, and she refuses to tell.)

And they have a group chat i just know it. And Both noah and eva are the driest texters known to man. They will not use emojis even if their life depended on it. And i feel like izzy is either extremely dry or so dramatic all her texts turn into a greek play. She’s either like; ‘YALL GUESS WHO I FUCKING FOUND‼️’ or ‘i found a fucking dead frog and i think someone ate his hair’

pt 2

also sorry that i had too much izzy she’s my favourite 😔

[clownboymcchucklefuck]

Colored Gaze: Seth Is The Most Dangerous LI.

sorry for it being kinda shorter than the others- I'm allergic to Seth. 💀

So we've all assumed that Seth is the safest LI for the longest time. But I have hard evidence that this is the complete opposite from the truth.

First off all is this art from Tumblr and Twitter that I'm really surprised that nobody has talked about before

So we already have seen visually that Seth is violent.

May I also remind you guys that the dev mentioned "hints that are in plain sight" which I think is a direct lead to Seth. Since he looks dangerous because he is dangerous.

There was also a time where I think somebody asked about what Seth was like when mad and it didn't say specifically but is did say that whenever Avery ghosted Seth that Seth didn't allow anybody around him for I think it was a while because of how mad he got. That should've been yalls first red flag smh 😒

Also this:

Now I'm not saying Seth can't be all chill and shit. But the thing you have to look out for is if he ever gets mad. And keep in mind that if MC does the right things/acts a certain way that he can be very clingy and I can only imagine how easy it is to anger him. And may I remind you that you won't be able to fight back because that mf is 6 foot and has childhood trauma.

Thats another thing, Seth is the strongest out of all the LI. TECHNICALLY SPEAKING, ZACHARY IS SAFER THAN HIM. 

Me and Kam [@dont-wannadothis-anymore] have also theorized in the past that he may have some links with the government, considering his job is left to player interpretation and that he's smart af too.

Also, has anybody talked about how its possible that Seth might have something supernatural? Not like a certain somebody but I mean in like a hex/curse type of way since its been mentioned that the family was into dark arts.

I've thought about it some and my immediate thoughts was perhaps a curse, I've heard of actual witches and such using snakes in curses/rituals so yeah, thats what my guess is so far. Maybe something like a naga?

Going back to him being dangerous, I have also noticed that it doesn't take much to get Seth mad. For instance, calling him the name his adoptive parents gave him.

And its very possible he might have some anger issues because bro got childhood trauma and we all know how that plays out most the time. 🧍‍♂️

Now once again like I said before, I do belive that Seth can be all chill and a little cutie patootie sometimes but do not let that fool you. I feel like alot of people forget that the whole point of Colored Gaze is finding out the LI's true personality and not just what's on the outside and you guys need to take that into consideration. ESPECIALLY with Seth. And with that all said- [evaporates].

___________________________

Seth belongs to - @clrdgaze

@dont-wannadothis-anymore @mysticnebula

[esther-dot]

Me: The A*ya tag can't be that bad. It can't be. I like A*ya too I should go to her tags and see what other fans that's not from my usual circle has to say about her! I can't take what other people say at face value! I should decide for myself how bad something actually is!

(the first post in her tags: literally about how OP is a 'stark sisters enemies truther' and how ar*a should never forgive sansa for the 'trauma' she inflicted on ar*a and how OP wants them to fight with ar*a winning and killing sansa)

me: *crying sobbing* I'm never venturing outside my circle ever again

Sorry to kind of vent in your inbox but man. That was AWFUL. I feel like a little kid in a cliche movie who ventured out into the wild despite their parents warning them not to do so because the outside world is dangerous, only to find out that yes the outside world IS dangerous and they learned the hard way

Why is it that the one thing I wish Sansa fans to be wrong about is actually right. Yall always right but at what cost

'stark sisters enemies truther' Wtf. 😂

I'm sorry you saw that anon. I encourage people to filter and block because the ASOIAF fandom can be pretty disturbing, and in my experience, that corner is the worst about looking for things to be angry about and then sending anon hate.

I’m not sure what happened there, if at any point their corner of the fandom was better, but they hate Sansa more than I have ever hated a fictional character. The seething rage they experience every day that Sansa exists and is loved (in-world and by her own fandom here) is extreme. I remember one of their more popular bloggers saying they’d be ok with Arya dying if it meant they got to watch Sansa die too.

I didn’t know they wanted Arya to kill her (for me, her threatening Sansa in s7 was the most traumatizing thing the show did ), but many of them were hoping Sansa would die in the show, and this one fan was commenting on other people’s posts fantasizing about show Jon killing her.

I’m guessing there are lots and lots of calmer Arya fans, but the active bloggers tend to be jonry@s and I’m gonna guess they’re resentful of how popular jonsa became in comparison. I mean, I love the Jon and Arya relationship, I was disappointed by how they were handled in s8, but that must have been a really bitter pill for their fandom.

Jon: Come visit me.

Arya: I’d rather go to sea and never set foot in Westeros again.✌🏻

ANYWAY, I wrote a little fic (show verse) about Arya and Sansa’s relationship, and in Healing I have some moments between them as well because I think Arya needs love and understanding, not kinslaying?? 😳 Where the Shadow Ends does a beautiful job working through post canon (show) Arya's issues/reconciling her relationships. I don't have any recs for book verse, but some of us did attempt some wish-fulfillment that's a little less horrifying!

[ikilledamanforthisurl]

who's lila yammerings (i should be asleep

thinking about Who's Lila again and i really do love how the three layers of the mystery as broken down by Flaw Peacock includes kindof commentary to the "all interpretations are equally valid/correct" writing copout that isn't just the opposite statement or a rebuke of it, but also something that ties it all in with the rest of the game's infohazard/memetic properties themes. like yes, broke = all interps are valid + woke = there IS a correct answer as this is a mystery, but also bespoke = the correct interpretation comes from the unconscious mind of all people, a zeitgeist, et cetera.

it can be equally as much of a copout- because break it down, what tf does that imply? that the interpretation that takes us at large is the most correct? so the most popular theories, and that the most widely accepted aspects of the game, are what is true? whichever red herring that turns out to be when it is handed to the public? it can totally be a copout. not for lack of effort or intelligence or artistry, as FP's video is nearly 8 hours for a reason, but also it can be copout. a REALLY COOL copout though. i can't picture of any other story that i know that does this, nor could i think of a better story to do it.

because it's all about the cultural zeitgeist and memetic properties. beliefs and feelings and ideas and superstitions that trend. Lila is the mystery but she is also a demon, she is also a trauma, she is also a metaphor, she is also a delusion, she is all of these things, but above all else she is what YOU hear she is. the most popular, most widely accepted interpretations are what get shared, and spread the furthest. unrelated people hear about it, maybe give these opinions the time of day for a quick read, and Lila has fully cemented herself in those people's brains as that interpretation, even if alllll that information they just took in winds up being dead noise that the brain scraps entirely with time. she WAS there, however fleeting, as is her abiding by her, or the, laws of memetics

and to me, this is the interpretation. but that doesn't change how people at large are viewing her and i certainly wouldn't know better as i haven't bothered looking into it. idk yall im not gonna ask. regardless she is whatever we first thought she was, and unless you dig deeper and find out more, she's infected you thus. just like how the Dada Dog was originally just some guy's silly drawing, but evolved into an alt-right symbol of actual genuine murderers. somebody took the Dada Dog and maybe unintentionally recontexutalised it when putting it next to their personal dangerous rhetoric, and their ilk ate it up like flies to the point that there was nothing left of the Dog but the picked clean, bare bones of its lineart and sombre expression

my best guess are that there are three layers to the current zeitgeist of Lila as well. 1. the unknowing crowd, who have maybe seen a few pictures at most and maybe a little bit of the game, assuming she's a trauma metaphor characterised as a paranormal thing possessing dear William. 2. the initiated, knowing a little more and who may lean towards her being a demon taking advantage of kids with issues. and 3. whoever was insane enough to dig this deep and grasp that she is exactly what we think she is

Conclusion: Poor William

[sketching-shark]

Man, zhu bajie n tang sanzang had to b up there w swk about their mischaracterization n hated in lmk fandom

I have never seen so much mishandling as i seen with those three characters 😭😭(like bro i get that the most noticeable arc that ppl retain is the white bone spirit arc bc of OSP BUT THEY DIDNT STUCK TO THAT CHARACTERISTICS IN THE LATER ARCS LIKE CMON NOW—bajie couldn’t even lie about the dragon piss medicine in a later arc, what makes yall think he’s always a fantastic liar. Theres some benefit to his lying but they also backfire. BAJIE DO END UP LIKING EVERYONE LIKE HE REFER TO SWK AS ELDER BROTHER!<- no man could ever live up to the wonder of zhu wuneng. He just sweet n he does get a fantastic arc in the novel!

Tang sanzang does have some(albeit rare moments where hes nice but his asshoole moments sometimes intertwined) where hes like “yea my disciples r greats but theyre mad ugly.” Or that he gets better at having more trust in his disciples besides zhu wuneng. Even if its followed by hella traumatizing moments that no human person would remain sane like that. <hes just barely holding on by his faith, his mission and his disciples. Not his horse bc he cant hold on to save his life but that character arc where he DIDNT FELL OFF THOO!>

Monkie Kid spoilers below

Hmmm I know about the Sun Wukong & Tang Sanzang dunking but is that happening with Zhu Bajie too? Have to say I find that a little surprising given that (if memory serves correctly) Monkie Kid did say Zhu Bajie's main fault (well besides the whole being a man-eating yaoguai thing) was being stubborn, but then lego Patriarch Subodhi said he became one of the hardest workers of the pilgrimage. I guess I was under the impression that people were more light on their criticisms and thoughts about Zhu Bajie, but maybe that's just because he doesn't seem to be a point of great interest in the lego show fandom lol.

Kind of funny story anon but I've been vicariously growing in awareness on how much Zhu Bajie is loved in China through @antidotefortheawkward's posts about the pigman. And yeah, I can see that being in large part because Xiyouji in its totality does give a very different impression of who these characters are and where they end up than a cartoony summary can provide. As a number of people on this site have noted for example, the White Bone Demon Arc can be understood in a much more complex light than "Tang Sanzang & Zhu Bajie hurt poor monkey for nothing" when placed in the context of it being more near the beginning of the journey when the pilgrims were still grating against each other a lot & it happening very soon after the whole debacle with the Ginseng fruit tree. Here after all you can see how the monk has a recent history of getting into serious trouble from the monkey lying and being quick to destruction, so he would be primed to not believe SWK, not to mention he does hesitate to use the headband against SWK more than many give him credit for here. And YEAH given all the things they go through together I am more willing to accept a Sun Wukong and Zhu Bajie enemies to friends arc than that put on many another character.

Also LMAOOOOO Tang Sanzang DOES seem to have quite a few lines where he tries to comfort terrified individuals by telling them that the pilgrims are good people even with their rancid looks (ugly pilgrim rights <3). And oh dang anon you are so right about how even if Tang Sanzang is much more of a static character in comparison to SWK it's kind of a shame more attention isn't given to the series of horrifying events he goes through and what effect that would have on him so that he gets a little more depth than "weepy monk who's mean to the Monkey King & falls off his dragon horse" in the popular western imagination. But then again I can understand why the monk's trauma is largely downplayed in western cartoony retellings, given that said lighthearted cartoony retellings probably wouldn't be the best medium to even touch on stuff like human butchery, death threats, sexual assault, and the consequences thereof.

[wolffoxnation2]

Im gonna give Loki's brother, Byleistr some of my eldest child problems

I know he's the youngest but i genuinly dont think Loki is that responsible (plus i've bludgeoned him with the trauma bat enough for awhile)

And i'd go to war for my Helblindi so he's only getting booped in the face with the trauma bat with that Zuko scar and those Dabi powers. (Yall can guess what that means)

So sorry bud (but not really)

(yall i am gonna be looking over my shoulder because at the point i am half expecting there to be a Byleistr or Helblindi rp blog)

(tho i feel like Loki or Laufey would fight me in their absence)

[theovergrowth]

GET TO KNOW THE MUN

NAME?: Robbie, King, Clown, I’ve been called Many Things lmao

PRONOUNS?: if we’re talking the easy route, He/Him. If ur chill then He/It ❤️

PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION?: Discord is the most reliable! My tumblr app hasn’t told me when people dm me since like 2021

MOST ACTIVE MUSE(S)?: Titus, obvi lmao;; of all my characters he talks in my head The Most and I get the most inspiration for him just day-to-day

EXPERIENCE / HOW MANY YEARS?: i started role playing over email in 2014 with a few friends from school, then found out about tumblr rp after undertale came out (…yeah my first muse was Papyrus what of it) so i guess almost 9-10 years at this point??? There’s gaps tho

BEST EXPERIENCE?: I mean for the Most Part I’ve had a lot of really good experiences with people! Especially Recently, the people I talk to are just very creative and kind and fun! Tho I do often reminisce on a thread me and an old mutual did when I first got confident enough to write OC stuff instead of canon, it was just a fun plot and we were both just Brain Broken kids ❤️❤️

RP PET PEEVES?: Ummm this is always a hard question, honestly I feel like I’m my biggest pet peeve in rp lol;; I guess my main thing is when people Press for Replies? Like yes remind me if it’s been a while, but I have had mutuals in the past who push after like a Day and it truly just makes my brain Refuse to do anything. That’s more a me thing tho I think

FLUFF, ANGST, OR SMUT?: with as much as I love making angst happen, I Love Fluff. It’s so much fun to write sad characters being happy ❤️❤️ Smut I have. No experience with (I just started writing smut in my downtime like 3 months ago and I respect yall who do it well So Much, it’s truly an Artform of its Own and if anyone has tips for beginners I’ll take em)

PLOTS OR MEMES?: Here’s my problem, right? Love Plotting, if I could plot until I die I would. But also. I might just plot until I die, because then I get nervous about not writing it in a way that feels the way it did when it was Plotted, ykno? Memes are fun but also I get Stressed by the Ask Box

LONG OR SHORT REPLIES?: i prefer longer ones, i think? Short can be fun, but I also have Too Many Thoughts to keep replies short

TIME TO WRITE?: oughghgh usually I Try to get to writing on my weekends, but;;; sometimes work and broken brain makes me Too Tired so it’s real Sporadic and depends on when I have Energy

.

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S)?

In some ways! Most of them have some Level of anxiety, most if not All of them are queer and neurodivergent.

Titus is honestly maybe the Most like me. I was homeless and lived in a van, Religious Trauma, complex about being Inhuman and Strange, autism, trans, and a lot of his little habits come from things I noticed me or my friends doing (tho honestly, Titus is more based on some asshole I knew in yellowstone lmao)

.

tagged by: @justashadetalkative (( aaa this one was fun!! ))

Tagging: if u see this 🔪 Steal It and Tag Me Pls

[lolexjpg]

dts s4 e9-10

e9: -another 4433 episode frothing at the mouth for it -if lewis had said 'thats what you get when you dont leave the space' after silverstone could you IMAGINE the things christian horner would've said. but max can say it after running over lewis' head. i guess -anyway i NEED another max/lewis championship fight yall dont understand -'christian is a bit like a jack russell terrier who likes to snap at your heels' no one does reads like toto jfc kaldjfasjdfalksjdf -'i don't believe to be successful you need to be an asshole.' SUSIE I LOVE U MWAH -the way lewis's voice gets high pitched when hes passionate abt something i love him i'm putting him in my pocket -not dts giving michael masi a whole introduction one episode before he gets murdered by public opinion -the shots of jeddah at night are So Pretty i actually really do like this track -the way rb talk about max's ruined quali lap is how i talk abt logan's deleted quali lap in jeddah. btw -the way they use mick's crash to set up "oh theres a safety car all the cars are gonna bunch up now~ wonder if anyone will use this opportunity for new tires :)" just setting up all this information for us to know NOW. for no particular reason :) -not max complaining that the SAFETY CAR is going TOO SLOW hes such a BRAT -god i need to see this race. aus23 levels of chaos it seems -i'm sorry but rb being like 'idk why max is being investigated 🥺 hamilton's the one that drove into the back of HIM 🥺🥺' like omg like max didnt do this EXACT thing to daniel baku 2018. its a PATTERN babes -when will my mans win again :( i'm sad :(

e10: -havent even started but i'm gonna CRY watching this episode i swear i am so serious -i'm already just so stressed out. being a max AND lewis girlie is only for god's strongest soldiers fr -'they like all this drama, but when we actually start racing they dont like it' max is so REAL for this -lewis hamilton rainbow helmet u will always be famous 2 me 😍 -checo max underrated ship btw. that cockwarming fic abt them *chefs kiss* -music is just making my stress worse (phenomenal) -part of me wishes i spent this winter break watching old races instead of watching dts, and this is a moment i'm really feeling it. i'm looking forward to at some point being able to watch this race and form my own opinions -( the end of the day i think regardless this result is never getting overturned and i'm at peace with that and i think other lewis girlies should work on that too~) -i will say. and maybe i'm missing something. i do understand the discourse abt only the lapped cars between max n lewis being allowed to unlap. BUT. if every car got to unlap themselves instead. would the result have been any different. how much does that particular detail matter. -ok now i'm just JEALOUS of u bitches who got to watch this live. i could've been there instead i was experiencing such intense trauma that i've forgotten most of 2021 (also i didnt know f1 existed) -OH I SAID I WAS GONNA CRY I KNEW I WAS GONNA CRY -i love lewis. i will always pick lewis over max. THAT BEING SAID -i watch this and i just feel relief. knowing the pressure he's been under his whole life from his father. for the first time in his life since he was little he gets to lift that pressure off his shoulders. i'm so happy for him. and like. you can TELL. how easier it is for him after this win. no matter the technicalities of this win, i find it impossible to be upset with all that context. i just feel overwhelmed with love

[ntrider]

5 13 27 39

hehe I asked for more attention and I got it thank youuuuuuu I love you anon

5: Do you take drugs? in a sense, no. I am personally really against alcohol and drugs for recreational use. one of the advantages of having a driver's license is that you can always count on me to be sober no matter where or when. I don't have any drug trauma or anything I just. REALLY hate it. cannot stand it. I'm cool with other people doing it of course, but I can only be so cool about it. if everyone's hanging out to drink and smoke yall can see me some other time yknow

13: Biggest turn ons shit that's hard to say. to answer honestly, I guess I like when people surprise me with how they approach me and others. so I would say people who display a lot of patience but still make you feel like they WANT to be patient, or that love to play on both yours and their terms and engage with teasing you but are still mindful to how much moderation they should have based on your reactions. attentiveness, even when subconscious, is very attractive. also when people see affection and attraction in similar ways than me or differently but still in a way that can connect with how I see it. so, focused on conversation, playing both together and in parallel, and casual intimacy. I guess. I was going to describe physical turn ons too, but slowly realized I was just going to describe the full anatomy of a human being. also praise. I adore compliments, especially when they feel earned (i.e. something I actually put effort into doing or saying was recognized and appreciated)

27: A description of the person I like they're really beautiful in every sense of the word. the passion for the things they engage with is extremely inspiring, and you know I mean it knowing the person I am. they show a kindness and way to... I guess focus on what they are and want to be? that makes me feel like I want to help them get there. not that I'm needed, but that it would help me to be there for their help, y'know? their sense of humor delights me, and the stories they share with others makes me feel assured that they're someone I want to truly spend time with because of how well they can exist with others and with me. I guess. is this what you'd call a description? look, I post a lot of poetry on main that you can read, like 90% of that is a description of a person, just through my emotions (so I guess it's also a description of me, in a sense?). besides all this admiration, they also just make me feel like they like being friends with me, which is really important. I feel appreciated, and pulled into allowing myself to be there. I suppose. they're someone who I feel like I would appreciate their every word but also their silence. their every touch but also their distance. whom I'd just like to hear about their day more than anyone else's. I suppose. I guess. I think. the more I say things, the more I feel like I'm saying the wrong things, or that I should be saying more things, or that I should be giving more. but I imagine they'd be satisfied with my answer because it's what I thought of saying...? or maybe not maybe they'd super not! but that's unlikely. would YOU be satisfied with my answer, anon? that I have no clue of. but I think people here like me because of how I am, and if this is a mess, then they like my mess. if you wanted a description of appearance, sorry I'm really bad at those. but I did say beautiful in every sense, didn't I? also it's embarrassing if I describe them too much because they and everyone else who knows them can read this. oopsies. I know I'm like, the honest person who's also really romantic and loves giving compliments, but you have to understand past a certain point of being a loving mess I just start getting self conscious of how much they should be hearing. some things I should not be saying!!!!! some things I should probably keep to myself!!!! I couldn't tell you what, though!

39: My favorite ice cream flavor hm... I like most flavors equally because I like ice cream more than most things in the world... I just really want every flavor available... but neapolitan is always nice. and lime. lime is very important. lime ice cream is so... so important... my favorite ice cream type ever was those cones that came FILLED with stuff, but I've never found diet ice cream cones, so I haven't had anything like that in years. sad!

[obey-me-headquarters]

Hey yall take this. This fic has been absolutely killing me for the last two days and I have no idea why. I just couldn't get the right words down. I swear there's like a good 500 more words that could have been added to this but I tired to trim it down to get the pacing to be better. I didn't allow myself from work on anything else because I knew if I stepped away this fic would fall into WIP hell. I'll probably redo at this point.

Note, this Mc in this story is specifically my Mc. I usually try to keep Mcs typical to fit anyone's Mcs into the prompt/fic, but this fic deals with how my Mc thinks/feels.

Warnings: no smut, but there is a reference to it. Pure angst. Mentions of death, immortality, childhood trauma (Diavolo's fear of abandonment to be more specific), I swear this fic isn't as heavy as this warnings paint it to be.

Pairings: Mc x Diavolo x Lucifer x Barbatos

Word count: 940+ (how the hell is this fic under 1k I felt like every sentence was impossible to write)

All should be well for Mc.

They're cuddling with their some of their favorite demons. They're in Diavolo's castle, in his bed, with the prince himself sprawled on their left side. To the right lays Lucifer, cuddled closer as the two demons boxes them in. Diavolo's arm wrapped around the both of you. Barbatos is resting on Lucifer's rest while the avatar gently threads his finds through his hair.

It's a familiar scene, one they often create after a scene. Usually sex helps Mc get out of their head, but thoughts wouldn't stop swarming around in their head.

Lucifer turns to see their furrowed brow and reaches out to touch it. Leaning into the touch they allow Lucifer to soften it.

"What's the matter?"

"It's silly." They're retort.

"Like so many of your other thoughts?" Lucifer teases lightly.

Mc laughs, but it's breathless, forced. They know their demons notice and feel their attention focus firmly onto them.

"I just.....it's dumb humans thoughts." They try to wave off.

"Dumb humans thoughts?" Diavolo echos.

"I guess I just don't know what to make of myself. Like, what am I? A fleeting fancy? A short citation in the grand scheme of things? I can't help but feel like everything I do and am is temporary."

They feel Lucifer gently take their hands unto his, looking up their vision is slightly blurred as they realize that tears had formed in the corner of their eyes. They don't block the look on Lucifer's face, an indescribable amount of softness bleeds through him.

"You're not a "fleeting fancy", you changed my - and I know many others, lives for the better." Lucifer speaks with a genuineness they didn't he could ever possess.

"So, I guess my legacy with live through something, at least." They respond with a sober chuckle. Face shifting downwards, unable to see Lucifer's face shift, concern painting his features.

"Legacy?" Diavolo echos once more.

"Yeah. After I die, what's going to stick?"

The room gets deathly quiet. Barbatos's gaze stays locked on the floor, while Lucifer looks like he just got cold water dumped onto him. They can't see Diavolo's face behind them, but they can feel the air turn cold.

"Sorry, I know it's morbid. I guess I'm just a mortal around immortals. I can't help but think about this stuff." They quickly wave themselves off, shifting back into the sheets as they lay back down.

None of their demons follow suit, as they stare in confusion and worry between them.

Finally, it's Diavolo who breaks the silence.

"What do you mean by die?" He asks, voice tined with an uncharacteristic stoicism.

They stare the demon in confusion. Surely he knows, right?

"Diavolo," they start gently. As though they're a parent explaining to their child why their hamster isn't moving anymore. "I'm a human? I'm going to die one day - not like, soon! But like. You're immortal, I'm not, surely there's going to be a time when you exist and I, uh, don't."

Honestly they know that death isn't a pleasant conversation for anybody, but surely they must have thought about this before. So why does Diavolo look like they're said something competently unpredictable?

"Being human and being mortal isn't mutually exclusive." Lucifer states matter of factly. Yet when they turn to look at him they can see the desperation in their eyes, the blind hope, the silent ask.

"R-right! Take Solomon for example, he's fully human yet has gained immortality." Diavolo echos. Through instead of hope it sounds self assuring, as though he's trying to convice himself.

Mc stares at the demon prince, eyes wide like saucers. "But like, isn't that....against the rules? You extend a human life?" They can't help but spare a glance towards Lucifer. Words left unsaid.

They feel Diavolo's arms tighten around them in a vice like grip, if he wasn't being so gentle Mc knows it would hurt.

"I'm the prince of the Devildom - the future king, if I say something is law it is." Diavolo almost growls out, voice deep and demonic. But Mc knows what lays underneath all that bravo; a scared little kid whose terrified of losing the people he loves.

Mc knows how to speak in silences, they know what they're asking. What they're eating for but can't bring themselves to voice. The scariest part is that Mc has no idea what they're going answer even if they get asked.

Swallowing dryly, their full of cotton they try to wave the conversation off. Plastering on their sunny smile they lean back into Diavolo.

"Hey, this is getting a bit much. I mean, I'm 21! I have decades and decades left! It isn't like I'm going to die any time soon." They reinsure.

"But....eventually."

"Well, yeah, sure eventually. But everything ends eventually. Who knows we could hate each other in a few decades! We don't know."

"But you are going to leave us, we know that." Diavolo states soberly. Mc knows they're a coward when they don't turn to face him, knowing that there's tears in his eyes.

Breathing deeply they ready themselves to make a promise they don't know if they can keep.

"Well, like you said, that isn't set stone either." Nudging Barbatos with their foot they snap him out of his trace. Barbatos flinches when make contact, eyes snapping towards them before refocusing. "The future is unpredictable, right Barbs?"

Barbatos stills, an uncertain look paints his face. Mc knows that he was looking through time lines, desperate to find what needs to be done, needs to be said, to keep them close to him.

"Right. The future is anything but predictable."

[crovoroh]

Gosh, so i read Runaway Max, and before i get into my book report this shit aint canon, it says its an official novel but im taking that with a grain of salt cause the cali backstory timeline doesnt match st3. But this book had so many moment where i was like oh man are they gonna go in depth with the child abuse at Billy AND Max by Neil?? And they just side stepped that narration everytime it came up. Also if i took a shot every time the author called Billy dangerous id get alcohol poisoning. I know its told from the point of view of Max but come on, you can be smarter then this. Anyways this is gonna be long and rambly probably

I just cant get over how many times this story touched base on not just telling but showing litteral child abuse and side stepped it each time, i guess the show does that too tho oop for starters fuck Neil, and also fuck Susan. If i was out on a family dinner and some man i knew for a couple months reprimanded my child for not calling him father, hed be the one being sent away from the dinner table not my child and it makes me so mad and sad that there are actually parents out there who are like that. Your gonna send MY daughter to the car for disrespecting you?? Great, im leaving with her. See you never.

Billy left the reasteraunt to talk to Max at the car and just, look. Let them bond over this awful man being awful. This to me read as Billy making an attempt to warn or maybe protect Max and its just left right here in that paragraph. It makes me so sad any possible understanding between the two starts and stops there. I know this is told from Max's point of view but its very obvious the author made up their mind on how one dimensional they think Billy is. Which is wild casue they kept pointing out signs of abuse in him, like prior to this car moment we have Max having this observation

Or this one

My guy is out right dissociating, hyper aware of his surroundings and unpredictable moods is a damn trauma response. From the words of my dear friend "you wrote a beautifully wrecked character, dont throw that thing out and teach everyone to do the same" also this aint canon but max thinks Billy is fun sometimes and that has me so soft.

And then this entire last scene in the book with billy is just, so fucking tone deaf. "he was damaged. Broken, maybe" yall i thought we were going somewhere with that but nope, im the fool for believing an abused traumatized character would get properly acknowledged but it was a big "hes just like his dad so he'll never be good and also hes worse then his dad, hes crazy" and im foaming at the mouth.

This author is such a billy anti, i think st4 took notes from her for how to represent Billy. I know its all told from Max, a 12 year old whos just sharing her feelings and observations but so much of this was just. Hhhhhh exhausting.

It wouldve been so easy to have Billy zone out and dissociate with the burning cat instead of forcing him to laugh and act insane (also if you think lighting a dead animal on fire is the making of a sociopath have you never been outside as a kid and found something dead and just, fucked with it. Its dead, i think lighting a dead animal on fire is probably the most tame tampering you could do. Not to call myself out but when i was maybe 8 i found a dead toad and i wanted to know what its skeleton looked like and how it decomposed so i took it apart. Kids are bizarre and teen boys are kinda destructive.

The whole scene with billy coming home halloween night and getting beat was upsetting and how it was never mentioned again was infuriating. Him getting attacked by Neil, punched several time getting a black eye and bloodied lip then beaten with a fucking belt. How do you just willingly write that shit then turn around and go "oh yeah nah this 17 year old who ive just said was verbally and physically abused multiple times is a dangerous monster who doesnt deserve sympathy". Im over it, if aang can put aside a century long fued to help his abused enemy who in turn still chased him off but was redeemed in the end then Billy and Max have the stepping stones to do the same, have max put an ice pack down, let billy Sort himself out, its so easily im going insane

And that bullyshit narrative of saying Neil is racist and how Billy probably is too. fuck that, i cant speak for the racism but when i made my first trans friend i was nervous about having them at the house cause i wasnt sure how my family would react or treat my friend so i opted to keep her away too, my situation was more tame then Max, Billy and Lucas' and my family turned out to not be transphobic so it was fine but im gonna self project that Billy was just manic and worried about Max hanging with a black kid and what Neil would do to lucas and max if he saw them. Seeing as how the man got away with denying Max dinner right infront of Susan who did nothing. But also max says how shes not like her parents so its just unfair to turn around and go neil is awful so billy is also awful and wont ever get better

This book isnt canon but i want a similar book from Billy's point of view. But also all things considered i did like the insight into Max's possibly past in cali, her relationship with her dad and mom was pretty neat, even tho, say it with me, its not canon, i refuse, I'll believe in bigfoot before believing this book was proof read by anyone working on the actual show 🥴 i have more to say but its 2 in the morning and i think my eyes are leaking outa my skull, hope this incoherent lmaoo

[spicyicymeloncat]

Crystalised part 2 ep 17 spoilers

GUESS WHOS BACK

Oh heyyyy it’s out in English (quality’s shakey but I don’t care at this point)

VILLAINS REALLY JUST BE SPINNING LLOYD. Isn’t he getting blood rushing to his head by now? Or neck ache?

The overlord looks like a fuzzy lion tbh. Like the shape. Actually he’s giving me fnaf freddy vibes. I haven’t scene a lot of fnaf tho

Overlord rlly be like, first I gotta accessories these bitches. The overlord is that meme where

Council: bye overlord we’re gonna take over the world!

Overlord: not looking like that you aren’t

Council: better?

Overlord: yass bitch slay

(I don’t remember how it goes)

Wow these guys sure know etiquette. Always remember to say please and thank you when the embodiment of evil hands you the weapons of god

Overlord: “yeah I guess I was trying to impress you like oh my god I’m just trying out my fashion career why are you so judgey im gonna cry I don’t wanna take over the world I just wanna start up my fashion business and I needed the golden weapons as the perfect accessories the catchphrase to my line up is “we put the slay in slayyy queeen” ahhhh”

Overlord: “was that not cool for you?? I’m also renovating, I’m gonna float my castle please tell me it’s cool also can you please look at my Lego army I forced Harumi to build out of Lego for me and please no mean comments I’m insecure 👉👈”

Actually love how the overlord has insecure vibes I mean he literally forced pythor to eat him just so the robots wouldn’t judge him yknow

THE COUNCIL REALLY JUST BEING MORAL EMOTIONAL SUPPORT THEYRE LIKE “ITS OKAY OVERLORD WE THINK UR COOL”

Wow okay aspheera really said fuck you vangelis btw did you I’m really cool and awesome. Like what tf did vangelis do man he was just standing there only to get absolutely slammed by aspheera man

Ohh yeah. Anti monarchist mechanic for real. Amazing. The overlord (the Crystal king) didn’t comment on it, but he was like bestie I’m right here

Everyone’s relationship with royalty is great

Pythor: became king through legal serpentine conventions (also lost the crown legally since he was proclaimed dead)

Aspheera: overthrew the emperor illegally and reinstated herself as empress

Vangelis: got overthrown himself

Harumi: legally was princess but overthrew her parents to reinstate someone else as emperor

Mechanic: anti monarchist

Mr F: literally just some guy

The Crystal king: what is he even king of? Is it just an empty title

Harumi internally: I’m beginning to sense a pattern in me resurrecting bad guys being a bad idea

Honestly Lloyd is such a king, he’s so sassy when like he thinks all his friends are dead, he’s in a room filled with all his trauma being confronted by the guy who possessed his father, uncle and killed zane. Damn he really chose sass instead of sad

The overlord really was like “choice number 3 🥺” sorry I can’t get baby boy puppy dog ck out of my head

Lloyd was like “great chat guys, *knocks over temple* imma head out now lol” yesss king!

Vangelis: oh yeah I can fly whOOP

That was such a cool scene but vangelis really got hit by random vengestone. He scored a nat 1 on his dexterity check

They’re like elementary schoolers “yes Lord!”

Istg Harumi now you choose to care about Lloyd. “Now he has no family (I killed them) he’s just like me and I sympathise!” Bestieeeee wtf. Can we pretend that that’s what ck said (yeah I’m calling the overlord Crystal king ck now lol)

Lloyd “I’m fucking lost :]”

“Ninja can’t fly” *coughs* airjitsu *coughs more* *dies of coughing fit*

Crystalised ice shuriken is so cool. But mr f said he prefers GUN

Vangelis and Mechanic completely ruining Pythor’s moment and it’s better bc they literally do not have any personal connections with Lloyd pffft

Oh my fucking got WHO IN THE CRYSTAL C*CK HAS THE BRAIN CELL TODAY BECAUSE ITS SHARED AND IT HAS BEEN LOST YALL YOU GUYS DID A SMALL BRAIN

Harumi has the brain cell too bad she also suddenly has emotions now too

Yeah team Crystal c*ck definitely left the brain cell at home, guys why did no one notice Harumi leave??

Woah it’s super convenient that this castle is fitted with automatic doors that don’t turn off when they have a security breach. I see the overlord really does value style over sense

The entirety of the c*ck squad shaking their heads “straight people…” (sorry for making an explicitly llorumi joke we don’t ship it here bc incest??? I just wanted to point out that I think the c*ck squad hates straight ppl. Also yes the council are all gay)

Tbh the impact of hitting the water from that height should have shattered their skulls. Luckily Lloyd is playing by minecraft logic

Aspheera: jump after them

Vangelis: *can fly*

Also vangelis: *fucking leaves*

Lloyd carrying around Harumi, a deadweight in the water, just like how he carries harumi, a deadweight to his emotional health

Lava 👀

Wu: “guys I have a plan but it’s illegal”

Everyone: “hell yeah fuck the police”

Ik it looks like I just made fun of the Crystal king and co for 10 minutes (Tbf I did) but none of that is complaints this so great, and honestly I enjoyed this, it was amazing. Im here for quirky gay legos in hot pink and vivid purple and that’s what I got hell yeah. Also crimeboss Wu appreciation

[system-of-a-feather]

"You know, isn't it pretty funny? Back in both of our primes we were saving lives, making life and death decisions, sacrificing and trying to make decisions that would have the least amount of long term damage and we were doing HUGE things - now look at us. Glorified maids."

I (Aderis, yall rarely see me lately cause I'm hella an old retired hag of an alter) said that at Lucille jokingly earlier today cause he had asked me to help him in a "maternal coup" cause the kids (Riku Squared) need some hard overhaul environmental cleaning help to keep them from going into their respective survival modes while processing that the bulk of the remnant of our trauma environment is going to be mostly removed from our lives and like... I really think that is the bittersweet thing about healing.

Cause like, I said it like I was trying to tease him for having 'fallen to my level' since one of the longest and most intense beefs in this system were between the two of us cause I was primary protector for majority of our life, then I was leading shit down a dangerous bad path and he coup and "shut down" the system and put me in a fucking basement and villiafied me and took over as primary protector for like 6-8 years, and that shit cause huge bad blood for a while; and I also largely lashed out because he actually did a good job and even after we started working well as a system, it massively made me realize we weren't in the environment *I* was made for and it really made me feel worthless and useless because I'm not made for peace - so like, that was a huge point of contention cause I was really jealous and grieving the time when my nature was adaptive and I was in my "prime" and that he ended up taking it over as the more adaptive protector

But like, with where we are - he too has been sat down since his original function hasn't been "needed" for like two or so years and so the two of us divided to our respective similar host. Lucille covers for Riku and looks over XIV, I do the opposite. And at this point, he too is also basically a mostly retired mom.

And so like, he hijacked the front briefly and 'called' me using our music positive triggers and asked me to help out with a maternal coup which like, essentially is taking the front whores (Riku squared + The Child) from the front by force and taking a day to make our life and environment better for the kids.

And its honestly kinda nice cause like Lucille and I - until now - have never been able to get along even when we both tried until today I guess and I was holding back the playful snark sass I had of saying "I think we can only get along now that you've fallen to my level" and was telling him I was trying to figure out what I ACTUALLY meant - but I think we get along now because we both have had to process being "useless" to our original purpose and have found peace and comfort in our "retirement"

And so me joking about how we used to be "so cool and important and intense and are now glorified maids" is genuine in the sense that I know the both of us are actually pretty happy sitting back here and not being needed and have found a resentful peace in just basically being caring maids for kids cause like... it's kind of nice in it's own way.

And I guess its particularly telling that the two ex-primary protectors are both retired parents that we really have done a fucking good job fixing shit. Hell even Ray's only like, part time and hes our Primary Gatekeeper and one of the big name protectors.

Like, Lucille, Eva, Ray and I are just back here vibing in our own ways looking over at our kids and sighing at their stupidity cause the four of us just honestly don't have to do anything. The kids are usually learning at their own rate and making not-life/death mistakes as they should for their age and its kinda nice.

Retirement and coping with the realization that the shit we were literally built for is no longer needed, but just having this simplicity is honestly worth it.

And I also think its pretty cool that Lucille and I are actually like, you know, talking and working somewhat functionally for the first time in the 18 years he's been around.

I think we are both too emotionally old and mature to still hold things like that too seriously against each other and have both kind of learn to let shit go. We both fucked eachother (I guess my side of the story makes him sound like the asshole, but I really did a toll on him in a number of ways) and we completely like, do not mix well in our interest, egos, talking styles and interpersonal issues and shit, but thats the past and whatever the fuck happened between us got us where we are and currently where we are is pretty good so fuck it. We both did wrongs to eachother and like, its really not worth ruining the future for and crap.

Besides, he's right with "if XIV and Riku can make shit work as well as they have then I don't see why we can't"

-Aderis

[thevoidofthefifthmoon]

hey. so.

i would like to say i dont identify with the label “proship”/”pro-shipping” but im sick and tired of puritans running amock in SO MANY FANDOMS especially twitter, and agree with some of the posts here, lmfao. 

i have 0 tolerance for certain depictions of fictional media but i dont go and fucking harass people or push them out of every conceivable social media space. i dont just throw around the words “groomer” or “pedophile” like an overused fucking buzzword and honestly dont even see the point in the label if its only going to be associated the same way it is with MAPs. which i want to clarify; i dont fucking support those freaks, why do you think a minor would honestly? 

i do however consume problematic media, n$fw or not, and if some hit a threshold i cannot mentally handle? i just fucking leave. i dont purposefully trigger myself and then blame the content creator as to why i feel so horridly shitty due to trauma. 

i also use certain problematic media as a coping mechanism because mental illness be damned, whaddya know, i have the most horrible intrusive thoughts that i can barely even discuss so i dont get banned or reported for being a minor discussing n$fw beyond what its known for the most. go figure. 

i dont even ship or indulge in dynamics that romanticize these certain problematic dynamics (ESPECIALLY incest and adult/kid agegaps), i take them as is, but even if i actively talk about them as they should be depicted from being real life situations horrifying to think about? i just fuck off from the ones that do romanticize. a lot of the time they dont even realize theyre doing it due to being victims of this abuse THEMSELVES and if they do and simply cope with the trauma of that? cool! but that aint my thing.

im not gonna shit on them for showing it to the world either. its their business. not mine. and its their spaces. the spaces for these victims and if it helps them cope then? GUESS THAT LEAVES ME WITH LESS TO DEAL WITH?

i guess under all qualifications, i am “proship”, but really i just dont give a fuck, i mind my business. unfollow me. sure. i dont care. id rather have that then cause a goddamn fuss about fictional characters that yall antis treat as if theyre real living breathing people. fiction affects reality at times but you can control your asses and death threats and harassment or making unnecessary callout posts? worse actually, and is much more personal.

the internet has become such an unsafe space that nobody knows how to fucking handle themselves and filter the content they see into things they actually like. or make a safespace for themselves. 

Grow the fuck up. 

[liliumwallichianum]

dear h,

i'm really struggling without you in this season of my life. i miss you more than you probably know, and i never thought i'd be doing this without you. there were a lot of things wrong with us but a hell of a lot more things right. i wish i wasnt an all or nothing person but the grey area is so difficult for me..

i hope you are doing well. i hope you and s are thriving and enjoying life together -- you two deserve it. i hope your fat (and somehow the skinniest minniest?!?!) ass is taking care of yourself.... i hope you found a workout groove either with walking or yoga or who knows. i just hope something finally spoke to you lmfao! and please tell me you ditched the juul/vapes and found balance with weed.... life is not that bad sober i promise you! and gratitude/love is stronger than anything i've smoked/drank/swallowed.

i dont think you'll be shocked to know, my life still revolves around my family. and i'm really okay with it. i truly believe that if i dont have family, what is the point of life? i really don't want to leave them and i'm okay with missing the potential of what could be if i did leave them... i am a family girl through and through, and i dont love or trust anybody like i do them. i love that i can be the bitchiest, moodiest, most cranky person to them and they still want to be around me LOL. and P just got a puppy...... you would love him dude. he's so adorable, kinda reminds me of the old man from Up. he also confirmed to me why i am a cat girl forsure lol!! but i love him, and he's inspiring me to get my own one day (pass on the puppy phase though, i will adopt an older cutie frenchie and great dane lol).

P is....*surprise* also expecting :) this has changed a lot for me. it's been really easy to focus on what matters most to me now. I always knew all of my distractions would disappear when I started my own family but it's nice to have this period where i can see how a baby affects me, without having the responsibility of having my own. i guess you can say i'm living the best of both worlds at the moment.

H, i commend you for your 3 month ashram stint. i'm trying to replicate that in this season of my life without actually having to leave. i figured that learning to evolve in the midst of chaos is better for me than actually removing myself from it considering 1) life will always be chaotic and 2) i thrive in chaos in a way! and lowkey it's... kinda working! i see myself week by week becoming more and more powerful.

speaking of power, i miss us being little witchy witches together. nobody gets me like you. i've def met other witches but i feel like our values and missions just dont align like ours did. so i'm sad for that. but...

The universe always replaces what exits your life with something bigger and better. so i let go of what we were, and though it will always bring me great joy to know we had each other during our worst times (<3), i am surrendering and allowing myself to move on. i am confident i will find someone similar to you in my future that is more in alignment with me and my soul than you were. maybe that will be the result of absence of trauma we carried through our friendship or maybe it will be because im a different version of myself that needs someone new.

i really love you H. you were so beautiful, intelligent, strong, pragmatic, cultured, etc. i hope you found a way to be kind and selfless in this life. i hope you learned the magic of abundance... abundant love, abundant gratitude, abundant vitality, etc. i hope you are at peace and i hope you are watching some bomb ass reality tv (i stopped btw :/ p gets me to watch an ep here and there and it's truly mind numbing for me but i know how yall love it so chalo).