#been doing a lot of work with self-improvement irl

[killemwithkawaii]

K.E.W.K.: *Walks back into the blog 8 months later with a mug of cold coffee and even bigger eye bags* Self-Care~ 👑✨

[thebibliosphere]

do you have any advice for someone who might want to get into the writing and publishing business but has technically no connections or experience? i grew up dead set on being a writer but had a crisis over my skills around college age, which led me to dropping my hopes of that career path and pursuing a different major. i’m still in an artistic field (theatre) but now i’m WAY back into writing again and experiencing major career regret. an early career existential crisis of sorts. do you think there are any steps i could take to dip my toes into the professional writing world as a theatre kid/playwright? i eventually think i’d like to publish a few books and short story collections, and i’ve been told by many people online and irl that my writing is very good. i’m really passionate about editing and helping people improve their writing too. i’d like to see if it’s something for me, but have no idea where to even begin. i’ve also only been graduated for a few years so I dont have a lot of career experience as it is. any insights you can offer as someone who’s done it would be immensely appreciated 💖

You don’t need a college education in creative writing to be a writer. Sure, it can help, but it’s not a necessity.

My best advise would be to find writer groups and become active there. If you engage in fandom content online, start building your community and friendships there too. Be around other people who write, and make sure you have the time to write yourself.

Also, a lot of authors have other jobs. Writing as a main job is not sustainable for most people. (It’s only sustainable for me because my readers are feral and my partner has a job that pays the mortgage.) So don’t think of it as choosing one over the other. Writing will always be there for you so long as you engage with it. As for what to do with your work once you’re done, that’s up to you, but self-pub is also always an option if trad-pub isn’t something you want to deal with.

If you’re wanting to get into editing, there are editing courses you can take that don’t require going back to university. But again, join writers groups, join online spaces. Be involved. Building a community of like-minded creatives is important.

[loser-female]

Math masterpost!

So you want to learn math. Good. Math is amazing. I studied physics for two years and I miss it SO MUCH. Learning math isn't just cool, but it's a great way to improve skills such as:

Resilience: sometimes you will get stuck for a while on a problem - this is absolutely normal for college-level problems. You won't start from here though;

Self confidence: mastering a subject known to be difficult is fun;

Problem solving: you will be less likely to just sit down and do nothing if something comes up in your life, you will be able to try to find a solution.

It will change your approach to failure as you will become more flexible in your thinking.

Unfortunately most people never learn how to properly study math. We all probably know how to study a book over humanities. We start by reading the material, then we take notes of the keypoints. But this method doesn't work with math, and math teachers often don't really know either.

For the basics I've made this post here. To sum it up:

Please don't start with "but i suck at it". Because then your brain will actually prevent you from learning (self-fulfilling prophecy, anyone?);

Realise that you need to master one topic before covering the next one or you won't be able to progress;

Really, the methods you use for things like literature or psychology or whatever won't work

Now I'm not a genius, I always was and I always be a terrible student. I have adhd, depression and chronic pain, all of which add a difficulty layer with learning.

I feel like most people fail because of the first point. I've seen this with people I've tutored IRL, people I try to fix their pc... Don't be the person that gives up before trying because no one likes that. Just don't. Remember that you are learning on your own and no one is going to grade your excercises. Now take that and make a poster out of iy.

Now, resources Where To Find The Stuff.

Khan Academy. I didn't follow this courses becuase well, university, physics, but everyone references them.

Professor Leonard

The Math Sorcerer

3b1b (curiosities in math)

Vsauce2 (fun)

numberphile (this for understanding math memes)

r/learnmath resources are great!

A great study method

Proofs? Proofs.

A 3 page document on learning math (but it's cool)

Terry Tao's famous post "there is more in mathematics about rigour and proofs"

Remember that, even if you don't like a specific youtuber, source or anything it has been a while since college and high school teachers started to upload their own material. Generally, looking for like "calculus pdf" will give you a lot of resources. Youtube is full of university courses of every kind and it's so good to access all of this knowledge for free. I cannot recommend you anything regarding textbooks because I still have my high school one. Also yes, i've used the Rudin as a complementary textbook in university but that's a bit too much.

I really, really want to emphasize the mentality part. Leaning formula is useless if you feel like garbage because you weren't able to solve the first exercise you picked up after a decade not doing anything.

My personal and sparce advice:

Unless you have dyscalculia don't use the calculator. I know, I KNOW. But this "lazyness" will make everything 10 times more difficult.

Beware about overlearning. Basically, when you solve everything at the first attempt and you keep doing the same thing over and over because it feels good, but the truth is that you are wasting time. This is the time to move forward.

Try to differentiate between a knowledge error(did I actually study the subject?), a conceptual error (did I understand the material), or a mere calculation/distraction error (fo example a missing sign, writing the wrong thing etc)

Try to solve the problems in different ways if you can.

After a certain time, It will be useful to review things done in the past, (ref: spaced repetition method).

Write everything down. Reasonings, steps etc. It will be easier for you to review them.

This posts keep crashing so I have to call it quits now.

but:

have fun

[im-no-jedi]

alright. it’s finally time. after almost four years, the series that radically changed my life is coming to a close. I’ve seen several other people make posts about this, so I think it’s only fair that I write my own. be warned, this is going to be long, rambly, and only somewhat coherent LOL

when this show was first announced, I was shocked. although I had fallen in love with the Bad Batch during their arc in TCW, I was unsure how an entire show surrounding them could work. I was even more skeptical after I saw the trailers, which had this mysterious child show up. and as I’m sure all of you know by now, my feelings quickly turned around just after the first episode. I immediately was endeared to Omega and looked forward to seeing how the rest of their story played out. by the time the first season had ended, I was already deep in the planning stages of writing out my self-insert series, MLWTBB.

I honestly didn’t expect to love this show as much as I do. but I quickly realized why after the first season ended. (I'm gonna sound like a broken record for some of you, I'm sure LOL)

firstly, the characters. like I said, I loved TBB from the moment we saw them in TCW. and I immediately liked Omega as well. but the way these characters have been portrayed and fleshed out has only endeared them to me more. it became clear to me very quickly that these guys were an eerily similar analogy to my own family. I already saw a lot of myself in Hunter, but the rest of my family are very similar to them as well, even down to certain dynamics between each of them. not only that, but their struggles also mirror my family in that we’ve suffered several losses in our lives too. my mom sobbed like a baby when Kamino was destroyed because she saw similarities between that and a similar loss we’d endured irl. which, for me, is why it hits SO much harder when something bad happens to them. Plan 99 was devastating for many reasons, but for me, because I see so much of my dad in Tech, it felt like I was losing both of them. and having already had struggles with my dad irl… yeah. I feel like these guys ARE my family now, which has been the running theme in MLWTBB. and it's been cathartic both seeing them get through their struggles in the show, as well as portray my own struggles through my writing.

speaking of my writing, this show has inspired me so much creatively, that literally nothing else is comparable. I had already ventured into the realms of digital art previously to watching this show, as well as publicly sharing some of my writing. but not only did my art significantly improve due to all the pieces I was drawing for this show... but my writing skyrocketed. I finished writing a fanfic for the first time since I was FOURTEEN. and I've both written and finished several stories since then. and I don't plan on stopping anytime soon. my art and writing will continue to flourish long after this show is over, I'm certain of that 😁

another thing is the real life impact this show has had on me. and honestly, this is the big one.

some of you have been following me for over a year or more now, so you'll probably recall the struggles I've had with my mental health, especially last year. I'd suspected that I had some mental disorder for a while now, but it was only last year that I really began to pursue the idea of getting diagnosed and treated. it of course began in therapy, then moved to having discussions with my parents about it. everyone was very supportive of me, thankfully... except for one person. myself. despite all of the work I'd done to move forward in my life, this was the hurtle I was struggling with the most. the fear of the unknown has always terrified me the most, so this unfamiliar territory was like a nightmare-scape to me.

then "The Crossing" happened.

fandom had headcanoned Tech being autistic for a while previous to this episode, myself included. some even liked to think all of them were neurodivergent in some way, again myself included. so when this episode dropped and we basically got the confirmation that our headcanon was correct? that. that was the push I needed. seeing this character that I love SO much in a show that I love SO much not only confirming his neurodiversity, but embracing it??? I literally told my mom that weekend that I was finally ready to get tested. and the rest is history. I'm now officially a part of the ND gang, and I've never regretted it for one second \o/

not only that... but I'm on meds now. meds that have altered my brain in such a way that I've NEVER felt before. my anxiety and depression no longer have a hold on me, and it's all thanks to this show 💙💙💙

and leading into that, the last thing I wanna mention is the connections I've made through this show. my entire family is (mostly) SW fans, so I've always had them to fangirl and discuss SW shows with. but I've missed having friends outside of the family to connect with. it's been YEARS since I've been involved in a fandom that had such a lovely group of people. and I know what some of you might say. and you're right. of course there's toxicity, just like any other fandom. but I can honestly say, I haven't met such a welcoming and friendly group of individuals as I have with this fandom. I've made some real, true, long-lasting friendships because of this show, and I'll be forever grateful for that. do the meds help? absolutely. but remember, I never would've even been on meds rn if not for this show either!!

and on that note, I just wanna call out some of the lovely people I've met, some whom I've only gotten to know recently! 🥰

@photogirl894 my beloved Morgan, my little sis, the Omega to my Hunter. you've been nothing but a joy and a blessing to me since the day I met you. I truly believe the Lord led you to me so that I could properly start this journey towards recovery and growth. I love you SO much, sweetie, thank you for being you 💙💙💙

@heyclickadee my dear friend, the conductor of the Tech Lives train. I've so appreciated your insight and wisdom in regard to all of the insanity. you genuinely helped get me through my depression after Plan 99, and you've continued to uplift me with your positivity and hopefulness. may we finally get to see our nerd alive and well again in your honor 🙏🏻

@clonethirstingisreal sweet Carol!! fellow Hunter simp!! getting to know you has been nothing short of amazing and wonderful! I can't tell you how refreshing it is to see an older fan amongst the young'ins LOL. we've been able to relate to each other in SO many ways, it still astounds me. I look forward to seeing your journey progress in hopefully similar ways to mine! 🥰

@lightwise @freesia-writes @better-to-bee @probadbatch (spacing this out so y'all get tagged properly)

@jedi-hawkins @anxiouspineapple99 @arctrooper69 @sunshinesdaydream and everyone else I've gotten to know both here and on Discord, THANK YOU!!!! thank you for letting me into your lives and for all the joy and laughs we've had together. I consider you ALL my friends, and I'm blessed to have met you all 💙💙💙💙💙

and finally, because I know she'll berate me if I don't mention her too, my best friend and irl sister @jam-n-ham. gurl, we have been through it, haven't we? you've been the sole witness to my reactions every week, and for that, I apologize LOL. but we have fun, at least, right? 😆 we've spent HOURS talking about this show, and I'm sure we'll have many more hours to come. you've also supported me and my writing, which I'm eternally grateful for (even if you can barely stomach the Hunter romance scenes ROFL). I can't wait to add in your additions to the story, and for you to see what I've been cooking up 😁 thanks for always being my no.1 bestie 🥰🥰🥰

I don't feel like rereading this before posting, so if there's any typos or whatever, oh well. the fact that I even got all of this out tonight is a miracle honestly haha. now if you'll excuse me, I have to start compiling every single box of tissues we own before tomorrow 😝

oh, and one last thing. an addendum if you will. I haven't been posting much of my thoughts about the finale for many reasons, but I'll just say this. ever since "The Return", I've been rotating Hunter's last words to Crosshair in my head, on repeat.

enough said✨

[daisys-reality]

@klayleyism Well, for me personally, I mainly used subliminals for academic stuff, for learning skills more easily (playing instruments, being better at tarot readings as well - how do you like my readings?😂) or manifesting specific things. In my last years of school, I ended up graduating as the best in my whole grade!! I was literally called 'too smart' and 'nerd' by my classmates and even teachers (- still feels unreal😭). I ended up having straight A's in math (!) and history which was impossible for me before that💀 like all my grades improved from average grades (mainly Cs, + a few Bs) to only A grades - in ALL subjects!!! But I also manifested things like entering my desired university or finding ideal opportunities (ex. ideal apartment, ideal internship) afterwards!

I sometimes used beauty subs, but I already liked my overall appearance before that so I just used them for enhancing my natural beauty you could say (ex. better skin, hairfree skin lol, healthier hair but also like specific charm/aura subs you know😏), other than that I think I also used to use subs like 'have more self discipline' or 'be better at setting boundaries' because i used to be a huge people pleaser irl but that's luckily all in the past now... Oh and I think you could also count my exchange year in South Korea back in high school as a result, I only used to listen to something like 'make my wish come true' subliminals at that time but it ended up working out so yeah😂

I don't really have a favourite sub maker but I remember using subs from baejin cafe, ¡naeka and enchanted workshop a lot !

I'm afraid my all time favourite subliminal for my academic life has been deleted...idk why but I can't find the sub maker account on yt anymore :( the sub was called something like 'elite student life', it had a pink aesthetic and there was a long and a short version... it was already an older one but it was one of the first subs that I used and kept using💔 - If any one knows the sub I mean or knows what happened with their account pls let me know :(

[thelocalmuffin]

Hello everyone! I wanted to share my accomplishments in 2023 before the year ends with a little bit of self reflection notes. You can enjoy everything in the read below.

Some fandoms highlighted include DGS, nintendo, and pokemon.

First off, this year has been hard for me. It's been a lot of self reflection and figuring my goals out after some became unattainable.

With that being said, I did accomplish a lot this year. I published my first recipe in a zine, finishing my first zine, improved my writing a lot, and picked up drawing once again. I also was able to get some actual help with some issues I have struggled with for years.

I want thank you all for your support. It means a lot that you enjoyed my artworks, writing, and ambition. Now here are my highlights for each month.

January: Foxtrot - An Asoryuu kitsune AU. One of the stories I took in when I was at my lowest last year and sparked a lot of my interest to keep writing. Plus Kitsune Kazuma.

February: Encore - A hassius story about motivation and being patient about the creation process. Though this was more or less my thoughts on this topic in general, this story literally inspired me to take my own advice and pick up drawing again.

March: The Memories that Lie - This was one I actually finished, but am glad I did. It's an asoryuu vampire story I was actually planning on scrapping, but ended up finishing anyway out of sheer stubbornness. To finish it, it took me completely restarting five chapters, but it came out a lot better than the original draft had mapped out.

April: This is when I took my hiatus and started to draw again in my free time. I was worn out, stressed, and collapsing under the pressure. This was my first piece that I posted.

May: Was a huge month for me. I launched the @blossominglovezine that you can enjoy here and published my first recipe in The Grand Adventure to Make the Perfect Cake for the @tgaacspringzine

June: I made my first icon! I was really busy this month planning for the trip of my dreams and doing some irl side work that ended up being permanent employment.

July: So I went to Las Vegas for a foodie tour. When I had a moment, I decided to draw the lovely Unicorn Goddess outfit.

August: This is when I did the Timmverse art study. This month was more of finishing up some logistics of zine work and getting a story out in the wild.

September: Goes to the Princess Peach Showtime piece I did! This piece really cemented my current style. And yes, I keep calling it Princess Peach Spotlight. Also wanted to mention I helped successfully launch the @dgscrimezine

October: Goes to my OC piece. CW for blood, but this piece was made for Halloween and the shading was really on point. I love this design for this OC.

November: I'm going with the fact I completed a ship week, asoryuu week. I got everything done at a reasonable time and was able to create so many fun pieces. 1 2 3 4 5 7. I had to skip day 6 because I ended up having an emergency. I also started pre-orders for my first for purchase zine, @desire-asoryuu-zine. This is still in pre-orders, so I wasn't sure if I was going to add it, but this is a big accomplishment for me.

December: I actually haven't been able to do much this month due to the holidays and getting distracted by Pokemon DLC, but I did draw this super cute Yuma!

Other highlights do include being accepted to multiple zine projects as a mod and contributor, which has been very exciting for me. You can check out that list here.

This upcoming year, I'll be helping with more projects and the @aawlwminibang events! I really want to do a personal project that I've been building up my skills for before pursuing, but now I think I'll be able to handle it. I won't announce it yet since it's still very much in development, but I hope I can in 2024.

Thank you all for your support this year. It has meant a ton.

[frogsandfries]

I'm so exhausted.

Okay, look, I know I seem to be expressing a lot of physical exhaustion lately, but this is more in regards to my increasing exhaustion with what the internet has become: One giant, inescapable, smothering advertisement.

I probably only want to cry about it right now at this very moment because I'm so tired, but I mean, honestly, if I'm not crying over it, I'm seething over it.

So you, a corporation, you don't want to pay your employees fairly or properly, and you then expect people who can barely afford their rent, never even mind their stupid health insurance or any of the other expensive life necessities, you really expect them to turn around and spend every last of their five remaining dollars on your piece of cheap shit instead of a cheap loaf of bread which will at least allow them to get through the next few days??? Unlike your stupid foot soak boot things, hey epsom your tired feet while you clean your apartment after work--multitask, grind, hustle!! But also, treat yo'self and self-care.

There's no fucking point in having fucking adblock, because when I go to research how to get better at my hobby, google wants to shove a dozen more products that I neither need nor want down my throat. The only way to improve a fucking smart phone is to make it a better shopping device. "Hey look, do you see something irl, maybe during your vacation or just out and about for the day, and you need to buy it right fucking here and now?? Buy our fucking phone because it will help you have fifty afterpays instead of the usual five that you're constantly balancing at any one fucking time."

As someone who used to be curious to learn, I still remember when the internet was seen as a way to exchange knowledge and information, and sure, if you're really, really good at using the internet, or if you're incredibly resourceful, and lucky, and maybe find a group on like Discord or Reddit or maybe Facebook, full of people who share your general interest, and maybe they have the knowledge you're asking for readily at hand.

But it's bullshit. The more and more ads in a row, video after video, song after song, that I have to wade through to get to the information that I came here for, the less interested I am in things like Youtube for information and learning. I really have cut myself off from learning, because increasingly for years, it's been harder and harder to actually use the internet to learn anything.

The internet has become a giant screaming relentless bright flashing fucking billboard advertisement and I'm just so.......done.

Look, frankly, I miss having books in my home. Books aren't very reasonable for lugging about the country to your next couch. But that lifestyle is behind me. Books don't constantly advertise at me. The index in the back of the book doesn't make me watch a fucking ad to figure out how I'm supposed to be doing this next part of my project or how I can up my skill at this thing I'm trying to learn or improve at.

And whenever the hell I decide to leave my meat-suit, donate my books to a library if no one in my family wants them.

I'm just so fucking exhausted. I'm doing relatively financially okay right now. I have money to pay my bills and feed myself and still grab a couple things most paychecks. It is currently often a choice between improving my household or taking care of my physical body, or taking care of my emotional well-being, but that's fine. A privilege, really, compared to the places that I've been.

But I don't have the buckets of disposable income that the internet seems convinced that I do.

The internet was supposed to be a beacon of information sharing and a new fucking era of communication.

I don't think anyone foresaw it being a capitalist hellscape. It feels like I can't move through reality or cyberspace without being screamed at on all sides to spend out every last dime on things I don't want, don't need, and am extraordinarily NOT interested in.

I'm so exhausted. I'm so sick to my bones, my guts, my soul.

The thought of escaping into the mountains, becoming a hermit, never to be seen again, becomes increasingly appealing.

[2kmps]

I’m curious about your writing. Do you have a background with it somehow? Or are you just naturally gifted? And don’t get me wrong, I believe you when you say you’ve worked hard to reach the level you’re at rn (at least I think you mentioned it before) but what how was it like at your starting point? What made you start writing?

Hopefully this doesn’t sound weird or offensive, I’m just genuinely interested bc I really like your writing style!

aside from basic academic stuff, I have no formal education in writing. i've never been naturally gifted; it's because i've been writing for twenty years. my earliest memories were short story assignments in primary/elementary school, that graduated to asking my parents for those plastic cartons of colorful floppy disks that I dedicated specifically to all of my little writing projects (this should really indicate how old I am 💀). they were about as good as you'd expect a 8-10y/o to write lmao

started writing fanfiction around 10-11y/o because I really liked final fantasy 7 and kingdom hearts 2 at the time. and it's just sort of been something I've stuck with ever since.

fun fact: my first fictional crushes were tuxedo mask from sailor moon, piccolo from dragonball-z, and cloud strife from ffvii.

writing has been my only consistent hobby throughout life, and as i've gotten older, I've dedicated a lot of time to improving (mainly bc I am insanely self-critical and nothing I write will ever be good enough), listening to constructive feedback, reading a lot of other works, and just trying to find a style and a tone that I liked most.

for me, I am a heavily detail-oriented and type-a person irl, so that reflects quite a bit in my writing with my prose, descriptions, world building, and character studies. I just like to feel immersed in the stories I create, the stories I read, the games I play, the things I do.

uhhhhh, however, to be completely real-real a lot of my skill comes from the fact I have a severely traumatic childhood that socially isolated me in my most formative years, SO writing was my only real outlet and connection to the world at all, essentially

I'm also pretty intensely adhd and have obsessive tendencies, hence me going absolutely fucking insane when I take on writing projects like OPAQUE and PERSIMMON & INK.

there are a lot of reasons why I write the way I do, but it all comes down to: one day I started writing and I just never stopped.

[nihilnothings]

Who is Fumiko, What is Fumiko, and Why is Fumiko?

Introduction

“Chainsawman and problematic women name a better duo”

  Today’s chapter has sprung a lot of discussion regarding a controversial character who goes by Fumiko Mifune, a new character within the list of CSM’s problematic women that joins Makima and Himeno in the groomer gang.

Her making inappropriate advances and actions towards minors already makes her be on so many people’s shit list, doesn’t help that she herself is within the “good guys” side (in the loosest term considering that most CSM characters are somewhat morally bankrupt) which makes it squicky for characters as well as the readers to work with someone who does actions that are a little too close to irl, when you make even Denji uncomfortable I think that character should have a moment of self-reflection. However, considering that this is the CSM world and PS as an organisation isn’t really a moral paragon, I think it makes sense to have some problematic nutcases within the organisation (PS really needs to improve their HR department smh). 

Currently people are confused and befuddled on why her previous actions (diddling and humiliating Denji) contradicts the words that she said within the newest chapter (liking Denji for who he is and protecting him). Like most CSM characters, they aren’t often the most straightforward types so if you take their actions and words at face value, you’re probably missing something (or not). Based on the many opinions of people on her there are two ways that you can view her. 

Fumiko the Manipulator 

One of the ways people can interpret her contradicting statements and actions is to perceive her as a manipulator who would do anything to keep Denji from transforming into Chainsawman. If she has to provide him with sex, so be it. If she has to be a Chainsawman fan, so be it. If she has to say that she likes him, so be it. It has to be remembered that Fumiko works with Yoshida and under PS with the goal of keeping Chainsawman from resurfacing presumably to halt Fami’s plans. This explains why she says a fan of CSM in one page and then says she’s a Denji fan the next few days. She even reveals to him that she and PS invaded his privacy, a fan has a normal amount of idolization. This is just stalker behaviour at this point! 

I think everyone who thinks that she’s merely doing her job would find that this interpretation as making a lot of sense right? Yesn’t. If she were doing her job properly then why’d she blab her mouth about surveillance and why would she give semi-subtle nudges for Denji to maybe reconsider his choices in not being Chainsaw. This could be interpreted as mere teasing or incompetence but Fumiko doesn’t seem to be the type to be that incompetently stupid, she’s carefree but not careless.Therefore her contradictions could mean something else entirely with the below interpretation.

Fumiko the Misguided 

In the recent chapter, Fumiko mentioned a bit of her backstory of her being caught in the chaos of the battle between AKI47 and Denji. At that moment, two things dawned upon her, CSM is not omnipotent and that he’s but a child. This view of him being imperfect festered and held two contradicting feelings within her where she on one hand wants to be “super” like Chainsaw and at the same time holds some resentment for his inability to save. At the same time, she also developed pity that a boy not even of legal age has been involved in operations meant for adults. These two feelings she felt recontextualizes and explains why she acted differently within their first meeting compared to subsequent ones where she’s much more affable with him. It is not wrong to say that she cares for him but that care is not completely pure as it is “tainted” by the resentment and idolization she felt. In a way the assault can be interpreted as a way of her “caring for his needs” despite it being ethically/morally wrong for her to do so as an adult, according to some people who hold this interpretation. Even if she does care, sad to say Denji doesn’t see it that way as she’s already broken his trust by assaulting him and taking away his privacy, Denji might be often be viewed as desperate but even he has his limits and he himself has had enough of any sort of “care” that only serves to harm his being. Is there any way for reconciliation? Perhaps, but only future chapters can tell. 

I find this interpretation quite interesting as it exemplifies the morally grey and black world of the CSM-verse, it doesn’t forgive her wrongdoings but doesn’t necessarily paint her as a moustache twirling villain either. However, you may ask, is this true? Hard to say considering that this is a first and her backstory while believable feels “stock” that it feels as if there’s more that she’s hiding from Denji as well as the audience. Characters who are often marked for death in order to further the protagonist’s development in CSM tend to have a flashback when explaining their motives or back story and considering she’s a more amoral parallel of Himeno it’s quite odd that she hasn’t had one. 

The Future of Fumiko within the Narrative? 

With these two interpretations can we now determine her role in Denji’s development considering she’s been attached to him for quite a while? It’s a bit hard to say on where her trajectory is but considering that there’s glimpses of her “caring for him”, as twisted as it is, her development may lead to him having a glimpse of a healthier relationship with women other than Power and Asa during their brief moment in the Aquarium, considering her age she maybe the “mother figure” (still kinda yikes considering what happened in 137) that he’s looking for before getting offed or maybe not and it’s just something platonic where they both see each other as the flawed yet at the same time well meaning individuals that they are before she probably gets killed off. Alternatively, it may be something else entirely because Fujimoto often throws off his readers.

Conclusion 

Fumiko isn’t a character that’s meant to be universally liked, with her polarising as well as contradicting actions and statements, she’s meant to incite a divisive reaction amongst the fandom, similar to her predecessor but even worse considering that she’s even more loose and immoral than her. That said, I am hoping that she’s able to stay long enough within the series as there seems to be a lot left to explore within her as compared to Himeno and Yuko who are more or less figured out, Fumiko hasn’t “revealed” all her cards to the cast as well as the audience. Until she reveals it, she can’t die yet lest she becomes merely fodder with no purpose. 

[shadowhoodie13]

I’m gonna get a lot of hate for this but it’s whatever. A reason I haven’t been rebloging as much avatar/ATWOW (blue ppl movie) is cause I can’t stand how often that fandom uses ai art to generate what “art” they want. I’ve been distancing myself from blogs I follow that make or promote ai art cause it’s obvious when they’re using ai. Like no you didn’t just make 6-9 fully fledged rendered pieces with slightly different art styles. There is no consistency to your work there is not love made into it and it tells me that it’s ai.

I’m huge against ai especially with the sora shit coming out that will be used to take more jobs from creatives and even be used in prosecutions cases, government propaganda, deep fakes of irl ppl that will be used to deny them jobs and hate crime propaganda. Ai “art” is a mockery of what is creatives strive to make. We do what we can to learn how to draw and get to the lvl of art we want. Y’all using ai for your self ships is so dumb. I get the economy is shit but fucking pay someone to draw you self ship art or do it yourself. Art is enjoyable the process is fun even if you might not always like how it turns out in the end. You learn techniques that can help you improve in the process IK I sure do as a self taught artist. If you genuinely can’t see why ai is so bad I’ll link a bunch of articles of companies and their sleazy activities cause ai is free.

Duolingo 1 2

Wizards of the coast/MTG 1 2 3

Wacom art tablets 1 2

Layoffs 1 2

Training ai off of actual artists and their work 1 2 3 4

Tools against ai 1 2 3

You can also do your own research but ai is taking creatives jobs. There is no good reason for ai

[izhape]

7, 12, 18

7.) what advice would you give your childhood self?

oh man...theres so many things i can think of but i think my genuine advice would be to choose myself instead of others. like, make decisions for myself and ease up on some of the trust i put in some people. or tldr please go to therapy even more you need it. also keep animating the warrior cats stuff so i could have actually been drawing better by now

12.) describe your best friend?

man i have so many best friends i think so im going to go over a few because i love them

of course there is oren my boyfriend and best friend of 9ish years we've grown together in so many ways and i love spending time with him. he's very creative and talented and dare i say handsome

my irl best friend is one of the sweetest people ive ever encountered irl. we have SO much in common which was really refreshing to encounter. she's been through a lot and she's improved so much and is in such a good spot in life right now which genuinely makes me so happy for her. also she's really talented musically

18.) describe your personal style?

i think i look like deadbeat smoker trucker dad genuinely LOLLL i wear mens work pants (or jeans) and ive got flannels or graphic tee shirts or hoodies and i also almost always wear a hat (esp my corduroy wolverine one i love it a lot)

i do try to wear fun earrings usually though and i have my bridge piercing B) i would like to update my style to be a bit more adventurous in the future but dressing like a granola hiking dad was my subconcious passion apparently

thank for sending!!!

link to og meme

[biganimal92]

update for the 4 of you reading this that care (this isn't meant to be pessimistic I just mean that very few of my friends follow me on here lol)

I feel like my art has been stagnating for a long time and it's mostly because I limit myself to fandoms and the attention I get for my fanart messes with the way I value my self-worth so a few months back I decided I wanted to start doing a lot more with my art to gain more personal fulfillment and to give myself a direction i actually wanted to take it in so that i felt like i was making progress and going somewhere with it. I was making plans to create a proper portfolio of things that weren't star wars yaoi or the dudes from fall out boy fucking, and I was planning on launching a YouTube channel where I posted speedpaints and stuff and I actually made some decent progress

I drew something I was really proud of and I knew the content in it would be pretty popular despite still technically being fanart, and I had a time-lapse recorded for it and everything, I was even halfway through the script. I also had a number of original drawings I'd done that I never posted anywhere and I felt like by this time I should have been able to properly launch this stuff and start taking appropriate steps to have my art reach a wider audience.

butttttt then my laptop died suddenly and randomly (i was literally using it just fine, i lifted it up from my lap and it shut off and wouldnt turn back on) and it's been in the repair shop for a week and they still don't know what's wrong with it. they think it's a motherboard issue and if it ends up being at least $600 to repair it I'm just getting a new laptop. I think they can transfer the data on the hard drive to an external that I have and if so that'd be wonderful because that laptop contains all the work I've been doing these last few months for this thing I wanna do with my art.

thankfully since then my roommate is letting me have one of his backup gaming pcs (he works in tech so he has plenty) and I've been able to get set up there in case I need to start my progress over, but the issue is that it's a Linux and clip studio literally doesn't work with Linux because the desktop version of the program apparently relies on either edge being installed if it's windows, or safari being installed if it's Mac. so I can't sign in or download the full version, I'm stuck with the super limited trial version, and because of this I've been trying to get comfortable with Krita. which thankfully can record time-lapses.

my mental health has only been improving since moving to Seattle despite some pretty low lows so thankfully, even though this is uh a pretty big deal all things considered, I'm handling it really well. I had one horrible encounter with a psychiatrist when trying to get treatment for my anxiety and adhd, but since my insurance here sucks since I'm poor and nothing has worked for my other issues I've been fortunate to be able to see doctors about, I've officially become a crystal mommy and I've resorted to ~alternative medicines~ and as a result I've had a considerable amount of improvement in a very short amount of time with the things I've struggled with getting help with from a professional psychiatrist. so yeah, I'm only getting better

biggest issue that still impacts me is that my attempts at befriending people irl have not borne much fruit, granted I haven't been trying super hard but with a huge covid spike coming up soon, said weak attempts are going to have to be put on hold for the time being. especially since the main thing I was literally going to do as soon as Christmas was over was join this drawing group that meets up every other Sunday, but now I don't have my laptop so it'll just have to wait regardless of what the state of things are looking like otherwise

uhhh what else. oh yeah I got into Chinese yaoi and Indian cinema and I got out of my head enough to start playing genshin impact again so basically I'm a huge faggot ama

OH SHIT I forgot to mention I got another horrible job and I'm kind of trapped into keeping it for at least a year unless something catastrophic happens because it's giving me really important experience in the field I'm trying to go into, but when I say it sucks I mean it's probably the most disorganized place I've ever worked at that wasn't a locally owned franchise. I work at an open-access low income healthcare organization that's all over Seattle so when I say it's terrible and disorganized I think you get the picture

anyway I don't know how often I'll be on here but I'm bored and lonely and scrolling through tumblr seems like a better use of my time than spending an entire shift looking at r/shittyfoodporn

[sylles-sylles]

If you thought I was really going to quit my career, let me tell you you fell into my fools day prank (that day was fools day for Mexico).

Well, here's my 2023 summary of art!! I also made the template inspired by a calendar, using this template from 2022 as a base: https://www.deviantart.com/electricmorningstar/art/2022-Summary-of-Art-meme-template-929805644

2023 has been a year full of great experiences and achievements. Yeah, I haven't posted a lot this year because I had some problems but there were many great things I've done and achieved: I won in art contests, my self-esteem improved, I graduated high school, I visited new cities, I slimmed down a bit and gained some muscle, I became more skilled in the college admission exam (I hope I get admitted for the next semester), I got a new job, I participated in a christmas play, I became more able to draw, my mental health improved a bit and I turned 20.

This year is definitely better than 2022 and well, I hope 2024 ends up being much better.

Thanks to my family, my online friends, my irl friends, my teachers, my therapist and all of you for helping me make this year great.

Plans for 2024:

- I wanna get more time to do some activities like drawing and working out

- I want to reach a normal body fat percentage

- I want to make art with the techniques I've learned from the high school's art class

- I want to get back to work on my projects scripts and ideas.

I hope you receive 2024 with a lot of happiness!!

••••••

🚫Notice: please, do not trace, re-upload. edit or use in your videos without crediting me. Please, do not use this picture in icon or banner without my permission. Only I can use this without crediting.

Agree with the notice!!

⚠️ If you don’t like this, don’t comment with insults, please, just comment respectfully what you dislike about this picture. You can also give me constructive criticism.

[greyborn2]

Five Random Things I Enjoy

Tagged in by both @skyrim-forever aaaand @thana-topsy - also massive heckin curses upon it being you two to tag me because otherwise I'd've probably tagged you in with this but ah well. Tagging in @kookaburra1701

Table Top RPGs. My GOSH my brain goes absolutely feral for them. Reading the rulebooks for them, running them, playing them, writing them... all of it. Just... gosh. Big happy chemical releaser. Not to mention how much it helps me socially. Like, I struggle a lot in IRL social situations and they generally just end up awful for me but having a game to focus on? Being able to vibe and do social stuff with a task AND I get to do fun improv? Fuck yes.

The SNOW!! Ohmygosh the SNOW. I've only seen snow twice in my entire life (only way to see it down on earth's butt here in australia is the mountains and they're a pain to get to for me as a city-folk person) but I ADORE it. Snow and mountains are just... like... perfection to me as an aesthetic. Snowy icy places are always my favourite places in games, even. Honestly probably one of the reasons I had such a bitter reaction to Skyrim (and still am not a huge fan of it tbh) is just how much they un-snowed it - the way it had been described in Morrowind and Oblivion... well... it had set my mind whirling with the sorts of mystical snowy landscapes I could get and there's only really two and a half snow covered holds outta nine. Ah well. Always mods~

Ovaltine/Malt!! So, like, I used to be a huge hot chocolate drinker. Loved that stuff. But found as I got older I was just adding more and more maple syrup (the sweetening factor I add to all my drinks rather than honey or sugar) to make it taste palatable and then... then I found ovaltine and ho-lee-fuck. Takes like half the amount of maple and creates what, to me, just tastes like the perfect hot chocolate. Only hot chocolate that can compare are those almost melted chocolate spanish style ones that are just... Mmmmmfffff. Perfection.

Lore!! My ex at one point referred to me as a 'lore gremlin' and honestly that is so fucking true and has worked its way into my day to day vernacular and self image so much. When I get into a new setting I DEVOUR lore. I am RAVENOUS for it. I eat up settings like I'm STARVING. There are some bits of media I've never even read/watched but I still know huge chunks of the lore for just because of my appetite for finding fan wikis and CONSUMING. Reading about worlds, and worldbuilding, is honestly just a favourite thing of mine.

My snake!! I don't talk about them much here/post about them but I own a Stimson's Python and they are my precious prince of light!! I adore them so fucking much. Got them last year and just... best decision. Best decision. Their name is Potato andddd they're the banner and icon I use here!

[elix8r]

never thought id do this but heres an essay on my thoughts on monkey bars 😭😭🤍🤍🤍

let me preface this by saying you did such an amazing job with this truly, you wrote so so well and i feel like you encapsulated every perfect emotion in the best way possible, and somehow it just gets better and better? i forgot how pt 1 went so i reread it before i read pt 2 and i was blown away again but youve even improved somehow ?!!? youre like the gift that keeps on giving 💋 also, thank you so so much for pushing through and writing this, i know it couldnt have been easy struggling with writers block but i hope u know we all think the world of this fic so please see the worth of your work 💗

ok now MY THOUGHTS!!! oh my lord, where to begin… first of all, same as before: from part one, i was already irked with jake when he pulled the beomgyu shit (albeit i moved on pretty damn fast surprisingly) but the cliffhanger you left us on was a game changer like he crossed the line so bad. i was conviced i would never forgive him. if someone did that to me i would have the exact same reaction as y/n tbh. anger later sad confusion panic first. and seeing the aftermath in part 2??? first of all, so glad she had such a good support system around her and people who actually put their morals first aka 02z bc u already know men irl would defend their “boys” first or whatever 🙄 hearing other girls gossip about her actually broke my heart cos if it was me i wouldve cried n had a panic attack there and then … and knowing my PARENTS know about it 😭😭😭

you wrote so well i was actually about to insert myself in NO JOKE!!!! like ok lets stray for a while but me personally i dont like “dumping” my emotions on anybody bc it makes me feel like im burdening them but when i read the scene when she went back home,, oh lord i wanted to cry in the dads arms there n then, u have a talent with words fr 🫣🫣

SORRY BACK TO OUR SCHEDULED ANNOUNCEMENT, nowhere in this fic was my heart set in stone. ok i lied. for the first 80% i was like FUCK THAT MAN HE DESERVES TO DIE IM NEVER FORGIVING YOU but then i started feeling pity too DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN WHEN I SAY YOURE AMAZING AT WRITING??? like am i throwing away my morals or am i just understanding that people are multidimensional,, woah lord,, like tbh i wouldnt have forgiven jake bc something of that scale is just not in my books, was way too extreme, but the way you wrote his character, his guilt, the actual situation??? couldnt even blame y/n for feeling sympathetic cos damn me too… i know a lot of people might not agree (especially irl. DEF NOT) but the way you wrote everything… how do you not feel bad for the poor boy 😭 in no way is y/n to blame for ANYTHING but at some point i started to be worried for jake too so i was like u know what. fine. get together with the boy. NO WAIT. idk. dont. IDK?!!!?

i think me personally, i wouldnt have been able to forgive him but i wouldve tried to move past it, despite how hard it would be. whether or not we get together would be a different question because rebuilding trust would take a lot, but,, yeah. overall i am soooo fucking satisfied with this, and the ending was so refreshing tbh!!! at first i was hoping they wouldn’t get together (literally when they kissed again i was like NOOO GIRLLLL WHYYYYY have more self respect!!!!) but after your slayful writing i was like nah u know what give them a happy ending,, n u did not disappoint,,,, i loved how it ended and that fresh start at the end was really like a breath of fresh air i have no idea how to explain it but it just genuinely did feel like a fresh start. i loved it. i will be rereading. thank you

OH MY GOSH THIS IS THE LONGEST MESSAGE I'VE EVER GOTTEN AND IM LITERALLY SCREAMING IN JOY BECAUSE OF IT!!

this was insane praise like omfg thank you so much! i always have such a hard time wondering if what i wrote is good enough to put out for you guys and to hear you say that is so meaningful to me 😭 the writer's block def was a bitch but hearing you say that you could see that I've improved makes everything worth it like i'd go through it again if it'll help me get better at writing im crying literally 🥹

so the whole time i was writing this last part i had a hard time deciding if oc should forgive him or not because personally i would never be able to but i just felt that the only way for this story to wrap up well and in a satisfying way would be if it was a happy? ending so i ended up just going with that and yes one of the main things i wanted to show was that everyone was rooting for y/n so i made sure no one excused jake's behavior

the scene where she went back home was kind of tough to write like i totally get you i get really emotionally invested even when im writing and jfc just imagining how my parents would react literally had me going through it like her dad was devastated and i think it really shows to what extent one person's actions/mistakes can effect cause this shit not only broke her down but also most of those around her so those scenes were def tough to write

but i am so so so glad to hear how much you enjoyed the ending and overall this story! you seriously just relieved me of so many of my worries regarding this story and i always feel like the best compliment is when people tell me they'll reread my stuff so thank you so so much for sending me this ginormous message and hope I'll continue to produce stuff you like! love you loads 🫶 🫶 🫶

[justashadetalkative]

GET TO KNOW THE MUN

NAME?: Gossy

(Picrew by Lunevani, found here. Thanks Swid!)

PRONOUNS?: Any non-neopronoun (he/she/they/it)

PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION?: Discord for any sort of involved conversation! Replies & tumblr messenger are both fine for short-form stuff, though.

MOST ACTIVE MUSE(S)?: Diamond for the most part; he comes naturally.

EXPERIENCE / HOW MANY YEARS?: I started roleplaying on online forums ~15 years ago, but I started doing DnD with my parents and pass-a-word-document-back-and-forth style rp with some IRL friends ~18 years ago.

BEST EXPERIENCE?: I don't really tend to think in terms of Grand Moments! I think that overall I've had a pretty good experience just, In General with rp. Exceptions have happened, but they've been mild and manageable.

RP PET PEEVES?: Lack of (positive) ooc communication is the main one that comes to mind. I want this to feel like something we're doing collaboratively, with good will and for the sake of having fun. I do also get disheartened if the initiation of interactions (e.g. ask sending, thread notions) isn't at least sometimes mutual, but that’s like... I don’t expect balance or anything; folk have varying levels of energy and anxiety and idea flow, and that’s natural! I just feel more comfortable with at least the occasional indication of reciprocal interest.

FLUFF, ANGST, OR SMUT?: Angst and fluff are both good! I'd theoretically be open to smut on Discord with the right characters & situation, but I've never actually written it.

PLOTS OR MEMES?: Definitely plots; I am so, so bad at improv, so it's kind of hard for me to respond to ic-memes a lot of the time. ^_^; That said, even when they're a challenge for me I do still like memes! They're a nice way to get new ideas flowing, and I like sending them.

LONG OR SHORT REPLIES?: Long and medium are best. Kind of like with plotting vs. memes, I do best when I have context to build from, and single-paragraph or shorter can start to be more difficult for me to work with.

TIME TO WRITE?: Fffff. Whenever I 1) have time, and 2) can convince my brain to cooperate. It's intermittent, sadly.

.

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S)?

We're all very queer. :P

Otherwise, Diamond's been hanging out rent free in my head since I was literally 4, so. I think there's absolutely overlap there and that it's also just anchored too deep down for me to untangle or notice specifics. xD

My other muses do often take at least one or two ideas, feelings, or questions of mine and extrapolate those to extremes; see where they'd go if they were big enough and internalized enough to be personality-defining. Clemcy and the fear of death, the arrogant know-it-all tendencies. Ithadel and the deep fear of overstepping boundaries, the self-knowledge of being a wet blanket in social situations. Oscar and the genuine belief that the whole point of it all is for us to care for one another and the world itself.

Phosa and Linast are question-based; I think a lot of their character struggles have grown out of my musings on the sometimes-immense discrepancies between who one is in raw instinct vs. who one is when acting purposefully vs. who one wants to be, and the further difference between true internal desire 'want' vs. wistful thinking 'want'.

.

tagged by: @archerwhiterp; thanks! :)

Tagging: @theovergrowth @needleandstory @desertfragments @writedisaster @oflostinfound @hearthtales @discipulusmaleficus