#bought a few things like a rug and wall shelf to make it more comfortable

[mtndewbajablast]

been undoing 10+ years of ocd-fueled hoarding over the past week or so and happy to announce we are in the home stretch despite the guilt & tears 👍

[hold-me-sickfics]

Taehyung x Yoongi “Experience is the best Teacher”

Hi guys! Sooooo I was in the mood to write and thanks to @thatoneemokpop-02 I got inspired 😁 here’s an mpreg fic based on a prompt Alex gave me last night! Hope y’all enjoy!

TW: food, mpreg, birth scene, anxiety, emeto (if there are any more please let me know!)

“Taehyungie, baby, I don’t know if we can fit all this in the car…” Yoongi eyed the ENTIRE STORE, watching nervously as Taehyung ran around pointing to various things he wanted. The nursery was Taehyung’s main focus right now, and Yoongi was sure it was because he was nervous about the baby coming soon. However, if it numbed Taehyung’s nerves, Yoongi was all in for it.

“Yoongi it’s not like I’m gonna buy the whole thing. Just a couple things if we really need them.”

Taehyung smiled as he looked through all the bottles that the store had to offer.

“Can we get these? They’re so cute!” Taehyung giggled, causing his tummy to bounce up and down. Yoongi swore it was the cutest thing he’d ever seen in his entire life.

“Babe we bought those last week, didn’t we?” Yoongi put them back on the shelf.

Taehyung picked them back up.

“No, those were the blue ones. These are yellow.”

Yoongi had to admit, he had a point.

“Alright, we can get them. But these are the last bottles okay? If we get any more, I’m gonna have to build another cabinet.” Yoongi chuckled, Taehyung’s beaming smile making him feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside.

“Deal.” Taehyung reached over into the buggy, keeping one hand on his tummy so it wouldn’t be pressed into by the metal siding.

“Ready to go? I’ll get you your favorite.” Yoongi couldn’t help himself, spoiling Taehyung was his guilty pleasure. It had been ever since he’d started dating him.

“Ugh Yoongi I’m already fat.” Taehyung looked down at his tummy, palming it just a bit. His mood swings were no problem for Yoongi, being as he knew exactly how to handle them.

Yoongi and Taehyung were behind a shelf, giving Yoongi a perfect shot (Taehyung hated physical affection with other people watching, so Yoongi was always mindful of it.)

Yoongi took Taehyung’s hand and gently kissed it.

“You’re beautiful, and I don’t care if your scale says that you’ve gained a little. Honestly, I can’t get my mind off of you when you’re doing your little waddle. It’s kinda sexy.” Yoongi winked at him. Taehyung couldn’t help but laugh.

“Min Yoongi you have lost it.”

“Mhmmm,” he kissed his head. “Now, don't fight me on this. Baby wants chicken strips. Does daddy want chicken strips?”

Taehyung felt his face turn completely red.

“... maybe a little…”

“I thought so.” Yoongi winked at him, and squeezed his hand. “Let’s go pay for these and then we’ll go get supper.”

“Ahhhagghhhh!” Taehyung’s smile quickly changed into a pained grimace as he rubbed his back. Yoongi was holding him in less than a second.

“What happened? Are you okay?” The worry in Yoongi’s voice couldn’t be clearer.

“I- I’m okay. He kicked and punched me at the same time. It hit my back. Agh it hurts…” Taehyung had tears in his eyes, but used his breathing techniques from his classes to calm himself down.

Yoongi’s eyes were filled with sympathy, wishing he could take Taehyung’s pain away. All he could do was to hold him, and copy his breathing pattern to keep him focused. Soon enough, Taehyung was back able to walk, and they bought the bottles and went out to the car.

Unfortunately, the kick managed to knock Taehyung’s appetite off. Yoongi begged him to eat, but the mere thought of food made him consider asking Yoongi to pull over so he could throw up.

When they got home, Yoongi helped Taehyung change clothes, and then assisted him in getting into bed. (It used to be easy, but with all the extra tummy weight, he had trouble balancing to raise his leg up.)

“I’ll be right back okay angel? I’m just gonna run to the bathroom real quick.” Yoongi kissed Taehyung’s cheek, and then swept his hair back.

Yoongi went and did his business, but the whole time he was thinking of how he could help Taehyung get through these last few weeks before the baby came. He hated it, but Taehyung was going to be nervous and feel bad no matter what he said. All he could do was support him. Still, he did feel like if he could experience what Taehyung was going through… maybe he could help more.

By the time he got back to the bedroom, Taehyung was already fast asleep. Yoongi took his usual position, big spoon for his beautiful boyfriend. His arm was wrapped around his midsection, right above his stomach. He felt the baby kick a bit, and smiled knowing the little one would be here soon.

Little did he know, he was in for a heck of an awakening…

----

Yoongi woke up to a sickening feeling in the back of his throat. He tossed the covers aside as he felt a stream of vomit coming up his throat. He was out of time. Next thing he knew, he was spilling the remnants of his dinner into the floor below him. Taehyung was awake almost instantly.

“You’re okay baby. Just get it up, I’ll clean it up in a minute.” Yoongi felt Taehyung’s hand rub up and down his back. Goodness he was so sore. It was like he’d been thrown up against a wall and beaten up. Everything hurt, and his stomach being so big and bloated didn’t help either. It made it hard to move. Why on earth was it so heavy? WAIT-

Yoongi looked at his stomach, and puked again. Taehyung actually had to catch him to keep him from falling off the side of the bed.

“T-Tae-Taehyung my stomach-”

Taehyung was behind him, eyes wider than saucers.

“Yoongi… Mine…” He looked down at his sculpted stomach, abs just as firm as they were before pregnancy.

“Oh heck-” Yoongi leaned over, puking again. Every heave wrecked his frame, and strained his insides. Now that he registered what was happening, he could feel the baby moving. Each kick and punch and stretch just made him feel worse.

After a couple minutes, Yoongi was left coughing and dry heaving. Taehyung kissed his crown, smoothing his hair down.

“I’m gonna come around to the other side and get you okay? Keep your eyes closed. It’ll help you not feel as sick.”

Yoongi nodded, one hand on his now, very large stomach. He clenched his eyes shut, wishing he could do the same for his nose.

He heard Taehyung putting a towel down on the floor to cover the puke. Then he felt Taehyung’s hands around him, helping him up gently.

“It’s gonna be harder to get up, just put your weight on me alright?”

“T-Taehyung I’m gonna puke again-” Yoongi dry heaved, the sound even causing Taehyung to wince. He knew that had to hurt Yoongi’s throat.

“You’re empty baby. It’s just the smell. Trust me, I would know. I was the pregnant one like four hours ago.”

Yoongi gagged again, feeling his knees go weak and nearly collapsing under him.

“Help me” Yoongi cried, tears rushing down his face.

“I’ve got you Yoongi I promise I won’t let you fall. Just keep your arms around me alright?”

Yoongi nodded, but kept shaking, knowing at any moment something else could happen. He had no idea being pregnant was this terrifying.

“Breathe Yoongi. Hey, focus on my voice. What do you hear me saying?”

“T-To b-bre-breathe.”

“That’s right. Now we’re gonna go take a bath and get you clean. The water will help with the cramping I promise you.”

“Mmmmmmnnnnn” Yoongi shuddered.

“What did I tell you just then baby?”

“W-water h-helps…”

“That’s good. Now sit down right here for me okay?”

Yoongi opened his eyes, shocked to realize that Taehyung had actually distracted him and helped him walk to the bathroom.

Taehyung leaned him down, feeling his own heart break at how pitiful Yoongi looked. He turned on the faucet, and added in some of his own lavender bubble bath soap.

“Taehy-hyung?”

“What’s happening baby?”

“B-baby’s moving-g. H-hurts…”

“I know it does. Here…” Taehyung ran a washcloth under the water. He started to wipe the sweat from Yoongi’s face and neck.

Yoongi moaned in comfort.

“There you go. That’s good baby.” Taehyung continued until the bath had filled up midway.

“Alright…” Taehyung kissed Yoongi’s rounded cheek, adoring the extra bit of baby-weight that pregnancy had added to him. “I’m gonna help you get undressed. Can you lift your arms for me?”

“Y-yeah.” Yoongi couldn’t think of anything except how scared he felt.

Taehyung slid his shirt off, slightly palming Yoongi’s stomach in the places that he could see the baby moving.

“Ahhhahhh,” Yoongi let out a half moan, half cry.

“I know baby. Believe me, I know.”

Taehyung got ready to take his husband’s pants off, helping him up off of the toilet slowly. Yoongi wrapped his arms around Taehyung’s neck, and just held onto him. Nonverbally begging for some of his strength.

“Taehyung… I- I-”

“It’s alright baby. I promise it’s not this bad all the time. Some nights are worse than others.” Taehyung lightly kissed the boy’s ear, holding him close.

“Ahhhhhhhahhhgggggh Taehyung I gotta lay down… S-something’s w-wrong…”

Taehyung’s eyes widened in shock… for some reason… a splatter of water had just hit the floor.

“Ahhhhaggghhhh hmmmmm…” Yoongi’s legs were trembling. Taehyung laid Yoongi down on the rug, thankfully they’d chosen a soft one when they’d decorated.

“Okay baby let me see-”

“N-no- no no, I can’t… I don’t w-want to…”

Taehyung felt his blood run cold. He had a really bad feeling about this.

“Just let me look. I won’t touch anything. I promise.”

Yoongi’s legs opened on their own, so it didn’t really matter whether Yoongi wanted him to see or not. What Taehyung saw was probably the worst thing he could have seen, or at least close.

“Alright baby I don’t know how but, you’re fully dilated…”

Yoongi cried, screaming in pain. Suddenly, it felt like everything had just crashed down on him.

“I- I c-can’t- p-lease…” Yoongi pushed involuntarily, feeling pressure and more pain than he’d ever experienced.

Taehyung saw Yoongi’s stomach tense up as he pushed down.

“Okay hey, look at me, look at me baby.” Taehyung’s voice was calming. The only bit of comfort he had in the whole situation.

Yoongi opened his eyes, and looked straight into Taehyung’s.

“I’m here. I’ve got you. Just push when you feel ready, okay?” Taehyung used his fingers to stretch Yoongi’s opening a bit, already able to see the baby’s head inside.

“Ugggggghhhhhhh” Yoongi threw his head back, his back arching in pain.

“You’re doing great. Yoongi I can see him already!” Taehyung smiled, tears filling his eyes.

Yoongi felt the urge to push, but wouldn’t.

“Baby I know you’re scared. Just do what you need to do. Your body is gonna show you how to. It’s gonna be alright, I promise.”

Yoongi felt a sharp pain erupt in his lower stomach.

“Taehyung hold me!” Yoongi stretched both his arms out to reach for Taehyung.

“I’m here baby. I’m right here. Just wake up.”

Yoongi was beyond confused.

“Everything is going to be alright. I’m right here with you. Open your eyes.”

Yoongi felt another intense pain inside of him, and he pushed.

“Yoongi you gotta wake up!”

Yoongi woke up, gasping. His entire body covered with sweat.

“T-Taehyung?”

Yoongi’s heartbeat was so loud he could barely hear Taehyung trying to soothe him.

“I’m here baby. I’m here.” Taehyung kissed his shoulder, unable to hold him due to the size of his stomach.

Yoongi immediately reached down and felt his stomach, then down to his privates. He was back to normal. He wasn’t pregnant, and moreover, he wasn’t giving birth.

“What happened?” Taehyung rubbed Yoongi’s arm.

“I-” Yoongi decided there was only one way for him to explain it.

“Taehyung, I’ll be right back okay? I’ve gotta run and get something from the store.”

“You are not telling me you had a nightmare because we’re out of milk.”

“I’m not, but there’s something I gotta do. I’ll be back in 30 I promise okay?”

Taehyung reluctantly said yes, and Yoongi threw on some clothes.

He made a quick job of his mission. Fluffy socks, 3 dozen roses, a bath bomb, as much candy as he could grab in one go, and Taehyung’s favorite from McDonald’s since they were the only ones open. Oh, and the milk. He couldn’t forget the milk.

He got home to see Taehyung waddling around the kitchen, making a mental list of things he had to do today since it wasn’t likely he was going back to sleep. He heard the door close, and turned around to see Yoongi crying.

Yoongi dropped everything and rushed to him, hugging him and half blubbering into his neck.

“You are beautiful and I love you so much and everything is going to be okay I promise. I’m gonna make sure you have the best doctors and the best of everything in the nursery, and I’m gonna build you that other cabinet for the bottles. I’ll start at 6:00, because Lowe’s doesn’t open until then but I’ll be there when the door opens. Anything you want, you just tell me. Anything. I don’t care what time it is or what else I’ve been doing that day or whatever. Anything you need is yours. And on top of that, I’m giving you a massage right now so don’t try and stop me.”

He swept Taehyung off his feet, barely able to see his path due to the size of Taehyung’s stomach. He got him to the bedroom and immediately turned the lights down and grabbed the lotion.

“You rest and let me do this. Want me to turn on the music?”

“Babe… are you okay?”

“Just work with me. Pregnancy makes you emotional.”

Taehyung didn’t question it, and just smiled at how cute his husband was being. He knew there were things he could say to thank Yoongi, but it seemed that right now the biggest thank you would be to go back to sleep and show him that his massage helped comfort him. He did promise himself to get more into detail about that dream in the morning though.

The end

[lu-undy]

Sick fic comin up! During a weekend Lucien notices how Mundy hasn't been coming out of his van and he gets kinda worried because it was really hot out. He comes to the van only to see a Sniper with a very high fever. Mundy has mood swings as well so he had to force him to Meidc to get treated. Lucien felt bad after and cuddled him to sleep after the check up.

Sick fic is here! Hopefully that does the job for you :D Enjoy!

"How's Sniper?" 

As soon as Engie asked, all heads turned to the one man who most probably knew: Spy. His spoon stopped mid-air and silence fell for a fraction of a second at the dinner table.

"I do not know." He calmly answered, his eyes on the empty chair in front of him.

"Got in a fight with him?" Scout asked and Spy threw him such a murderous glance that it might have been real bullets. "Just askin'."

"Non." Spy simply answered. He didn't like to have his private life exposed and especially not in front of all his colleagues.

"Might wanna check on him, maybe." Engie said. "He was supposed to come get his SMG off my garage, it had a small problem. I fixed it but he never came to collect it." 

Spy nodded and dinner resumed, albeit in the same awkward silence for the next few minutes. 

After dinner, the Frenchman went to Engineer's garage and knocked. 

"Come in! Oh hey, Spy, what can I do for you?" 

"I have come to collect Sniper's weapon. I will go and give it to him." 

"Oh, sure." Engineer rummaged through his tools and metal scraps before he found Sniper's SMG. "I gave it a bit of a polish too, now it shines nicely." 

"Thank you." Spy took it and turned on his heels. 

"Uh, Spy?" Engie called and he stopped sharp. "You sure everything's alright?" 

Spy sighed. 

"I don't mean to bother you. It's just sad to see you like that and I want to help if I can." Engie explained as he wiped his hands on an old rug. Spy raised his eyes from the floor to his colleague but quickly looked away before answering.

"I am not sure. I haven't had news from him in as long as you all did. I might have done or said something wrong, I don't even know. Add to that the fact that he is a solitary man, he has grown to like being on his own… I don't know if I should go and see him or not."

Engie looked up at his friend. 

"I'd say you try anyway. See if he needs anythin'. Worst case scenario he doesn't want to talk to any of us and needs a few days, but that doesn't mean he doesn't like ya." 

"Hm." Spy left the room without adding a word. He walked through the corridor, climbed the stairs back up before exiting the base. He raised his eyes after he closed the door and saw the campervan. The light was off inside, it didn't look like Sniper was there. Yet he could hardly be anywhere else. So Spy walked to the back door and gave a few knocks. 

No answer. 

"Sniper, it's me." 

"Come in." 

Spy pushed the door and entered. The van was indeed dark but his eyes got used to it rather quickly. 

"Engineer has finished fixing your SMG." Spy put it on the counter before his eyes saw a silhouette tightly wrapped in the bed covers. He took a step more and realised that Sniper was giving his back to him. "Sniper?"

"Hm." He answered before coughing a few times.

"Was it me?" Spy asked. 

"What?"

"Did I do or say anything wrong?" 

"No, what are you - achaa!" Sniper sneezed.

"You are sick. Is this why you have locked yourself up here?"

Sniper grumbled as an answer. Spy raised his hand and let it slither between the bars of the bed until he touched Sniper's back.

"Sniper…" Spy gently stroked his back. "I thought you were furious at me."

"Why would I be? You did nothing wrong." Sniper answered before coughing more. 

"I am happy you are not." 

Sniper felt Spy's hand disappear. A moment later, he heard the kettle. He rolled in the bed to see what was happening. Spy raised his eyes to him and got startled by the sight… Sniper's eyes were red, slightly swollen, he had tears running down his cheeks and a longer stubble than usual. 

"Mon pauvre amour…" 

[My poor love…]

Spy got closer and put his gloved hand on Sniper's cheek. 

"Don't touch me, I might contaminate you with whatever's bothering me…" He coughed further.

"Oh…" Spy turned and poured the hot water into a cup that contained a tea bag. "Here, drink this."

"Nah… I tried and it doesn't work."

Spy's distraught face came back. 

"Have you told Medic at least? If you have been ill for days, it might be worth mentioning it to him."

"Nah," Sniper sniffed and took a paper towel. Spy realised that there were lots of them crumpled on the bed, lying around. "I don't want to see that maniac, especially when I'm weak and can't defend myself if he tries anything."

Spy winced slightly. 

"I understand, but he is our medic. He surely will be able to give you something to help you out of this state… Argh, I hate not being able to touch you!" Spy spat. 

Sniper smiled faintly.

"Sniper, please. Let us go and see Medic. If this lasts longer you won't be able to work and that will mean further problems… Oh and screw this, I will touch you with my gloves on!" Spy did as he said and as soon as he put his hand on Sniper's brow, he felt his temperature. "Mon Dieu, you are very hot!"

Sniper smiled faintly and as he blinked, a tear rolled down his cheek. 

"Yeah, well, you should have noticed it earlier, love." 

"I did not mean it that way. You have a fever, mon amour. Come on, I will help you and we will go to Medic's quarters."

[My love]

"No."

"Sniper-"

"No! I said I don't want to see that freak! Achaa!" Sniper roared and Spy frowned. 

"You have tried curing yourself on your own and that ended up in you being locked up here for absolutely nothing! Nothing! Nothing more than us being separated and driving me crazy because of it!" Spy answered, matching Sniper's angry tone of voice. 

"It drove you crazy?! What about me?! I'm the one stuck there, cryin' my eyes out, sneezin' and sniffing, not bein' able to eat or do anythin'!"

"Oui and you kept me thinking that you were furious after me! I ate as much as you have in the past few days! Now stop being childish and let us see Medic for your illness!"

"Ugh, you're such a pain in the arse, Spook!"

"Don't make me drag you there."

"As if you could!" Sniper answered and Spy snapped.

"Who carried your body back to the base the other day when the enemy Spy backstabbed you, hm? All the way from your nest to the intelligence room, on my own, your lifeless body in my arms! Was it not me?! Oui, it was! So either you cooperate and you go of your own free will or next time you blink, you'll open your eyes on one of Medic's hospital beds!"

"You bloody… Gnh…" Sniper frowned but he started moving. He got down his bed and Spy covered him with his own jacket. He took a nearby scarf and wrapped it around Sniper's neck. He was all slouched and couldn't carry his weight comfortably. 

"Let me help you." Spy put Sniper's arm around his shoulders and carried part of his weight. "Here are your slippers, put them on, good, now let us go." 

"Spook?"

"What?" Spy looked at his lover, his tired face breaking his heart.

"Don't - ahem - don't leave me alone with Medic… Stay with me, please."

Spy's face relaxed from his anger. 

"Fine, I will. Now, let us go." 

They exited the van and crossed the base without meeting anyone on their way up until they arrived in Medic's laboratory/hospital. Spy knocked at the door. 

"Come in!" 

He pushed the door and Medic's eyes went to whoever stood there. 

"Oh, hallo Spy. Sniper? What is wrong with him?" 

"You are the expert, Docteur. We had hoped you could tell us."

[Doctor]

"Follow me, you'll put him on a bed." 

A few moments later, Sniper was on a hospital bed, Medic was inspecting his vital signs and Spy was standing nearby. 

"He has been in this state for the past few days. He has lost appetite and coughs and sneezes all the time. He also has trouble sleeping and is quite feverish." 

"Ah… Let me see…" Medic took his stethoscope and listened to Sniper's heartbeat. "Can you cough, Sniper?"

Sniper obliged a few times. 

"Hm… When did this whole thing start?" Medic asked as he now took a close look at Sniper's red eyes with a small light.

"Three days ago." Sniper answered 

"Anything you changed in your diet or what surrounds you that day?" Medic asked, putting the light away.

"Uh… No… I don't think I did… I had lunch and dinner like you all and uh…"

"You asked me to help you change your duvet for the winter one that day." Spy recalled. "And you also bought a new pillow if I remember correctly. You had complained that yours was very old and I suggested you should get a new one." 

Medic nodded as he backed off and took notes.

"Ah, yeah, was it that day? Can't remember…" Sniper closed his eyes for a moment and tears rolled down his face. Spy took a handkerchief out and wiped them. "Back off Spook, you're gonna catch whatever I have."

"Nein, he won't." Medic answered as he clicked his pen shut and put it back on his labcoat. "Tell me, did the illness get worse and worse over the days?"

Sniper nodded with his eyes half shut.

"I see. This new pillow you bought, can you bring it to me?" Medic asked.

"Spook?" 

"Of course, give me just an instant." 

"Spook, wait." Spy turned. "Doc', give us a sec', please." 

The doctor nodded and took a few steps back, he turned to rearrange some vials on the shelf on the wall.

"What is it?" Spy asked, whispering.

"Please come back fast, don't leave me alone with him too long." Sniper answered between two sniffs. 

Spy smiled and wiped other tears on his lover's face.

"Everything will be fine, do not worry. Hold on to my handkerchief and wipe your tears."

"Bugger, I'm crying a river and I can't even control it. Sorry… But yeah, Spook, please…?" 

Spy nodded and held Sniper's hand under the handkerchief.

"Don't worry. I will run to your van and back, is that fine?" 

Sniper nodded. 

"Run fast, ok?" 

"I will." Spy whispered before turning to Medic and adding out loud, "I shall be a minute."

Medic nodded and Spy exited the room, leaving him and Sniper alone. 

"So, what do I have? Is it serious?"

"I will confirm it in a moment but if I am correct, it is not serious at all. Although, you should have come to me as soon as it started. And if I'm correct, the worst thing you could have done is lying in bed…" 

Sniper frowned with his eyes closed. The light was too much and made his eyes tear up very fast. Soon Spy knocked again. 

"It is me, Medic."

"Ja, come in. Ah, thank you, I will take a sample and have a look under the microscope, just an instant." 

Medic disappeared to the room next door. 

"I ran as fast as I could." Spy let his knuckles brush against Sniper's stingy cheek. His stubble had grown quite long. 

"Thanks, love." Sniper answered his eyes still closed but he could feel Spy's presence right in front of him. Sniper was sitting on the medical bed, his legs dangling in the air and between them was standing Spy. He leaned forward and buried his head against Spy's chest. 

"Oh, mon pauvre amour…"

[My poor love…]

Spy hugged Sniper dearly. But Sniper pulled his head away fast. 

"Bugger! The suit, I'm cryin' on it, you'll kill me!"

"Nonsense." Spy pulled him back against himself. "I do not care about my suit half as much as I care about having you in my arms."

"Spook?"

"Oui?"

"'m sorry, Spook… I shouldn't have locked myself up…" Sniper mumbled against Spy's chest. "Should've come to you… 'm sorry, I'm so sorry…"

"Shhh…" Spy leaned his head down on top of Sniper's. "You have nothing to apologise about. It's fine. Now you know, next time you feel ill, just let me know and follow my advice. If you are ill, you can't think straight.' 

"Spook?" Sniper said, closing his eyes both to rest them but also because Spy's touch felt way too good through his hair. 

"Oui?" 

"You forgive me?"

"For what?" 

"Bein' a mongrel." 

Spy smiled. 

"Of course I do." And he added, whispering, "I love you, Sniper." 

The poor Aussie smiled and wrapped his arms around Spy's waist.

"Love you too… Love you so much, I've missed you, Spook, I really did." Sniper's fingers clawed into Spy's sides.

"So have I, Sniper. But I thought you needed some space, so I gave you some. I understand it because I am the same when it comes to personal space. Sometimes I just need my solitude." Spy still scratched Sniper's scalp lightly as he murmured to his lover. 

Medic opened the door and had to stop sharp at the door, seeing Sniper's head between Spy's arms and them cuddling shamelessly. But he shrugged and came to them.

"My intuition was right. You are suffering from an allergy, Sniper."

"To what?" His muffled voice asked. 

"Acarids. Your pillow is full of them. Now the good news is that with these tablets," Medic gave them to Spy, "and a few precautions, you'll be back to normal in a few days."

"What shall we do, Docteur?" Spy asked as Sniper's head was still cuddling against his chest. 

"Take 3 of these tablets a day for a week, wash all your bedsheets and get another pillow that's anti-acarids."

"I have some I can lend you." Spy said and felt Sniper nod against him. "Thank you, Docteur."

"No problem. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some paperwork to finish." 

"But of course." Spy answered. 

A few minutes later, Spy and Sniper were in the Frenchman's room, sitting side by side on the sofa. 

"Thanks, Spook." Sniper put his glass of water back on the coffee table. 

"Did you take the pill?"

"Yeah, I just did."

"Is the light too much in the room and you can't open your eyes?" Spy asked.

"A-a bit, yeah… But it's also more relaxing to keep my eyes shut cause otherwise I cry a lot more."

"Let me turn off the lights anyway." Spy answered and did as he just said. "There we are, much better, non?" He sat back next to Sniper who leaned on him. 

"Thanks, love."

Spy smiled. 

"May I make a suggestion?" He asked. 

"Sure."

"Given that you can't sleep in your bed and I have anti-acarids pillows, do you want to spend the night here?"

Sniper blushed. 

"Uh… Here? Here on the sofa?"

Spy kissed his lover's hot brow. 

"Non, not on my sofa."

"Where then?" Sniper asked, confused.

"In my arms. I have missed you terribly in the past few days and I want to catch up all that time."

"We can't do that, love."

"I know, but at least let me have you near me for the next few days, and nights, if you want it too?"

Sniper smiled. 

"O'course I want it. But when you say 'in your arms'...?"

"I mean sleep with me in my bed. It is large enough, even for someone as tall as you." 

They both smiled. 

"If I could open my eyes, I'd…" Sniper's shyness prevented him from finishing his sentence.

"What would you do?" Spy asked. 

"I think I'd… I'd kiss you."

"You don't need to open your eyes for that." Spy answered. 

"But I can't see where your lips are." 

"Non, but I can."

Spy bent on his side and took Mundy's lips between his. They wrapped their arms around each other and clung there for long minutes that only felt like a mere instant. 

"Hmm… Love you, Spook…"

"I love you too and God, how much I missed you. I want to never let go of your lips." Spy answered. 

"M-me too."

Their lips met again as they dived to lie on the sofa. They legs mingled, their hands touched, pulled and grabbed, and soon, Spy added the French to the kiss and Sniper's tears flowed even more with the heat.

[donteattheappleshook]

Some Fairytale Bliss AKA: Deflowering the Deckhand

Thanks @kmomof4 for betaing and to everyone in the CSSNS discord for help with the title/puns

Set during Operation Mongoose: Part 2. Emma decides to teach the shy deckhand a thing or two about swordplay. Mostly just smut. 

@snowbellewells because you asked :)

On Ao3

Trigger Warning: Brief mention of a past dub-con/underage loss of virginity. Everything that happens in this fic is fully consensual

-/-

Emma sits in the captain’s quarters, thrown by how familiar and different it somehow feels all at once. She’s been here so many times, has slept in that bed, sat on that desk trying to distract Killian from whatever he was writing in his journal. The room is the same as it always is but somehow just not quite right. She doesn’t know if it’s because the Author and Gold have never been in this cabin before, and had had to make it up based on what they imagined and what was in the original story book, or if it’s because in this reality, Blackbeard is the captain of the Jolly Roger. 

So many things are the same, the wood, the furniture, the deep tapestries and rugs that adorn the floor and the walls, even the comforter on the bed beneath her is right, the same silky feel under her fingers. But the objects on the desk, the little bits of treasure that Killian had collected throughout his life and cared enough about to decorate his space with are missing. As is his brother’s sextant. And his books. It’s eerie and wrong to look at that empty shelf where both have always sat. 

She shivers. She needs to get them back to their world, get Killian back to who he is, her parents too. That’s been harder than anything, knowing that her parents are evil in this realm, that they’re trying to kill Henry, that they’ll certainly kill her if they can. Everyone here is so different. But especially Killian. More than anything Killian. This version of him, he’s so shy, so sweet and so nervous, nothing of his usual swagger and confidence remaining. And the goat’s milk. Don’t get her started on the goat’s milk. 

A smile pulls at her lip as she remembers the expression on his face when she’d defeated Lily, so excited, so anxious, but proud - of her. She remembers how he’d looked when she’d bumped into him in the tower too. He’d been dazed, eyes wide and mouth hanging open as he looked at her with no recognition but with the same awe, the same longing that her Killian so often looked at her with. 

The difference this time was that while he looked at her as though she was the most beautiful woman in the world, he also looked at her as though she were the only, the first woman he’d ever held in his arms. 

But she’d seen that desire too, that longing as he’d held her against him, but she could tell he didn’t know what to do with it, it had made him flustered and awkward as he pulled away to shake her hand, but not before she felt the hardness pressing against her. 

He’d jumped back like she’d burned him, no quip or comment or flirtation, not even a wandering hand. He was a deer in the headlights, panicked and confused and so nervous. It had been confusing, but endearing too. 

There’s a knock on the door and Emma looks up, asks who’s there, which feels ridiculous because there are only two other people on the ship, both of whom are welcome in the room with her. 

“It’s Killian,” his voice answers, muffled through the door. “I’ve, um, I’ve found you some clothes,” he stutters. 

“Come in.”

The door creaks open slowly, hesitantly, and Killian steps through, shoulders hunched and head hanging down, looking at the floor as he cradles some pants and a shirt neatly folded against his chest. 

“You don’t have to ask to come into your own cabin, you know,” she tells him and he flushes, his hand coming to scratch behind his ear in a way that’s so familiar it makes her heart ache a little. She’ll get him back, she tells herself. 

“Perhaps,” he starts slowly, “in your world this is my cabin. But it is certainly not in this one.” He clears his throat, holding the clothes out to her and she takes them from him, their fingers brushing as she does. He pulls his hand back quickly as his cheeks flame. 

“Thank you,” she tells him, trying to catch his eye but he won’t look at her. She steps past him, locking the door so that Henry won’t come down and walk in on her changing - that boy doesn’t need any more traumatic teenager memories, Storybrooke does just fine in providing him enough of those. He’s up at the helm, sailing them back to the Enchanted Forest, but it’s better to be careful. 

She sets the clothes down on the bed and starts to undress, working at the awkward, cumbersome buttons and fastenings of this land’s fashion. She misses her jeans. She hears a startled sound and looks up to see Killian staring at her, looking equal parts stunned and then ashamed when he meets her eye. He stumbles over his words, saying that he’ll leave her to get changed.

“You don’t have to go,” she tells him, raising a brow and he freezes. He looks like he very much wants to stay, but also like he very much wants to run out of here, leaving a Killian shaped hole in the door. “It’s nothing you haven’t seen before,” she says casually. Or touched, or kissed or licked, her thoughts supply. 

He clears his throat, looks back down at the floor. “I’m fairly certain I’d remember if I had,” he says and she smiles a little. Look at him, she thinks, that was almost flirting, almost a compliment. She continues undressing and he doesn’t leave but continues to stare at the floor. 

“What’s the matter?” she asks, trying for gentle but maybe coming off a bit more annoyed than she means to. She’s basically told him that she doesn’t mind him watching her undress but he hasn���t made a single innuendo, hasn’t tried to touch her or even look at her. Instead he’s standing there looking scared and unsure of himself. 

“It’s, um, it’s not appropriate,” he says. “For me to look at you in a state of undress.” She hears him mumble something about propriety that she barely catches but it's the next thing he mumbles that makes her stop. She barely hears it, barely makes it out but she knows she heard the words ‘not worthy’ fall from his lips, a self-deprecating frown crossing his brow. 

“Killian,” she says, dropping her hands from the fastenings. “Look at me.” 

He keeps his gaze firmly fixed on the wood below his feet for another moment and she waits, waits until slowly, he raises his eyes to hers, focused on her face and not the buttons she’s managed to unlatch at her breast. She holds his gaze and resumes her task. His eyes flicker down quickly to where the bodice of her dress is open and his eyes widen, his chest rising and falling with heavy, shaky breaths. 

She wonders then, not for the first time, exactly what backstory this version of him was given. He’s a deckhand, she knows that, and he’s allergic to rum and apparently a coward based on what Henry told her Blackbeard said. But as she thinks about the way he’s looking at her now, how he’d looked at her in the tower, had struggled to touch her, to even compliment her… holy shit. Was he a virgin? Did Gold make Captain Hook - the man who had seduced his wife away, made her fall in love with him - too afraid of speaking to women to ever have had one? 

“Killian,” she asks again, and he meets her eyes. “Have you ever seen a naked woman before?” He goes red again, a bashful, pained expression crossing his face as he looks down and shakes his head slowly.

“Only the mermaids,” he says quietly. “In Neverland,” he specifies. “And they were terrifying.” Emma remembers Killian using a wholly different word to describe the mermaids. 

She continues undressing, not asking him to look again, not wanting to force him into anything or make him any more uncomfortable than he already is. But he doesn’t leave and slowly, his eyes raise back up to her, following the movements of her hands as she sheds the outer layers of her dress until she’s left in only her corset and shift. 

She can see that he wants to look, to touch, but he’s afraid. Whether of not knowing how, of not being allowed to, she’s unsure, maybe both. But she can see the desire in his eyes, the pale blue swallowed by black, his lips parted, his breath uneven. She can even make out the tightening in his leather pants. But he still doesn’t move. Wow, Killian Jones, the virgin. 

She remembers Killian telling her about his first time. He was too young. She remembers that most of all. The men on Silver’s ship had brought him to a tavern and bought him a woman. He’d been nervous the whole time, awkward and unsure, could hear the men laughing and shouting crude things through the door. It had lasted two seconds and it was the worst two seconds of his life. It was awful. Neither he nor the woman had enjoyed it. 

She looks at him now, and she feels as though she’s looking at a younger version of him, one who’s unsure of himself, shy and sweet but still kind and brave despite what he thinks of himself. And the way he’s looking at her now, he may not be lusting after her the way Killian usually does, with desire and want and a clear intent of what he plans to do to her evident in his eyes… but he’s looking at her like she’s the freaking sun. Like he can’t look directly at her despite wanting to. There’s desire there and want but no plan, no idea what to do. And so he shrinks away. 

Emma bites her lip as she looks him over from head to toe. Yeah, she thinks, recognizing the ridiculousness of it all, she’s going to deflower Killian Jones. She’s going to give him a proper first time, find a way to erase the doubt and the self-loathing in his eyes and make him see himself for who he really is. 

Henry is sure to be above deck for another few hours sailing. She told him that she was going to change and then she was going to teach Killian swordplay - she smirks - so she’s not worried about any interruptions. Killian is still looking at her, looking at her as though she’s the most awe-inspiring thing he’s ever seen and she’s still fully clothed by her world’s standards. 

“Will you help me?” she asks, gesturing at the laces of her corset that are tied tightly behind her. She expects him to be flustered, to cough and stutter and shy away but instead he swallows, eyes raking over her. He clears his throat and nods, stepping forward. 

She turns around and he only hesitates for a moment as she gathers her hair and lifts it over her shoulder, his breath hitching, before he sets to work. He unlaces them painfully slowly, the sound of the string pulling through the loops the only sound in the room apart from their heavy breathing. It’s agony, a slow build up of tension as she feels his breath on her neck, his fingers warm where they touch her through the material of her shift and she wonders for a moment who exactly is supposed to be the blushing virgin right now. 

He finally gets all the laces undone and the corset falls to the floor. He hovers another moment and then steps back so she turns to face him. He casts his eyes to the floor again and she tells him it’s okay. He can look if he wants. His eyes drag slowly back up her shape, his breathing ragged again, though whether more from desire or nerves she doesn’t know. 

She smiles, knowing she can’t tease him, that this version of him couldn’t take it, no matter how much her Killian enjoys a challenge and a little word play. No, she’ll be sweet with him, with this man who is looking at her with reverence and awe. She pulls the laces of her shift free and it slowly slides to the floor with her dress. 

She’s naked now, standing before him fully clothed and the way he’s looking at her is causing goosebumps to rise on her skin, her nipples to tighten and the beginnings of an ache to stir between her legs. She’s never been someone’s first before but she’s going to treat it like the honour it is. Will take more care with him than Neal did with her, than that woman did with Killian. 

She sees his throat bob and his brow pull up as he looks at her. He looks at her like it physically hurts to do so, his hand clenching at his side, his erection evident in his leathers. It gives her confidence, how clearly he wants her. She steps forward and he stiffens, eyes snapping up to her face. 

“Do you want to touch me?” she asks. He doesn’t speak but he swallows again and nods. She smiles softly, takes his hand in hers and lifts it to her breast. She watches his face, the desire and the uncertainty and even the curiosity playing across it. He touches her for just a second, instinct taking over and she gasps, arching against his hand just a little. She knows that hand so well, knows what it can do, knows how it feels on every inch of her. 

He drops his hand, stepping back. “I’m sorry,” he says quickly, worry and fear in his eyes. “I shouldn’t have -” 

She takes his hand again to stop him leaving, cuts off his apology. “It’s okay,” she tells him. “I liked it.”

His eyes go wide, shock and disbelief on his features. She lets his hand go, waits for him to make the next move. He steps towards her again, his hand raised between them, not quite sure of himself but a little more confident than he’d been a moment ago. But he’s still not touching her and she can tell he wants to say something, wants to ask her something. She waits until he’s ready. 

“Can I -” he starts, hesitates. Always hesitating. “May I kiss you?” he asks.  His voice is so low it’s practically a whisper, like he’s ashamed to ask. Her heart tightens. She wants to grab him and kiss the ever living hell out of him but she knows she can’t. This time, he really couldn’t handle it. 

He’s not looking at her so she says “yes.” He looks at her with both shock and relief, clearly having expected rejection. He steps forward again and she’s almost proud of him, thrilled to see he’s gaining confidence. He raises his hand to her cheek, brushes it softly with shaky fingers before curling into her hair and cupping her face. He steps forward again, into her space so that she can feel the heat of him, can feel his breath on her face, his forehead all but resting against hers and her body is screaming at her to just kiss him, but he pauses. 

“I don’t… I’ve never…” he starts and she can feel his resolve weakening, fears that he’s going to pull away. She knows she’ll have to take the lead with most things tonight. But she wants him to have this. Wants him to initiate this moment, to take what he wants and know that he did. She steps forward, their lips not quite brushing and tilts her head, hand on his chest, waiting for him to close the distance between them.

Yes! She thinks when he does. There’s a lack of finesse to the kiss, a lack of skill, or really any movement at all. He simply presses his lips to hers, inhales deeply and basks in the feel of her against him for a moment. 

He pulls away after a second and Emma’s worried that he’s going to stop, that he’ll let his self-doubt get the best of him and change his mind so she doesn’t give him the chance, leaning back in and kissing him again. It’s a little awkward as - after his initial shocked ‘oomph’ - he tries to figure out how to move his mouth over hers. She can feel his heart racing under her palm. 

But he’s a quick study, copying her movements at first and then slowly letting instinct take over until slowly he relaxes, letting himself fall into it. And he’s good at it. Maybe not as good as her Killian, but well on his way, enough that she can feel her blood heating and her body calling to him and she presses into him. 

He gasps and she takes the opportunity to slip her tongue into his mouth. And his reaction is amazing. For a second, he stops being the scared deckhand and he reaches for her, pulling her to him, tilting her head back so he can lick into her mouth, grinding against her hips, his hand all over. Emma gets lost in it, the feel of him pressed against her, his mouth on hers, his tongue and lips and teeth exploring and tasting and devouring and she needs more. 

She reaches for the buttons of his vest, undoes one, and he freezes, pulling back suddenly. She lets him but doesn’t allow him to move far, bringing her hand to his cheek. She spooked him, she realises, snapped him out of whatever daze of lust he’d been in and brought back all the doubt he has in himself. 

“Hey, it’s okay,” she promises. “We don’t have to do anything else if you don’t want to. We can just keep doing this.” He looks at her and relaxes a little but he doesn’t seem to want to stop, leaning into her unwittingly. “But,” she starts tentatively. “I want to touch you too… if that’s alright.” He’s hesitant for another moment before he presses his forehead to hers and nods, a little eagerly too, which is sweet considering how unsure he is. 

She kisses him again, soothing him, letting him relax before she undoes the buttons of his vest, slowly, giving him time to change his mind, and then moves on to his shirt. He’s shaking when she’s done and she slides her hands over the sliver of revealed skin and hair. He gasps into her mouth again, stomach muscles jumping under her touch. She looks at him as she pushes the material from his shoulders, watching for any hint of discomfort or uncertainty but instead he just looks like he wants. He might not know what he wants but she’s excited for him to find out.

The shirt falls to the floor and she slides her fingers back up his arms, his own coming to her hip and she fiddles with the straps of his brace, not sure what he’d prefer. Killian takes it off sometimes, leaves it on others, it depends on how much of a rush they’re in really. But the Killian in front of her looks unsure, he hesitates. 

“It’s - It’s not pretty,” he tells her. 

“We can leave it on, if you want.” She doesn’t tell him that she’s seen it because she knows that doesn’t matter. What matters is that this version of him hasn’t shown it to her and she leaves that his decision to make. After a moment, he raises his hands to the straps and slowly unlatches them, fiddling with the complicated bits and then sliding it off his arm. 

Emma trails her fingers down to his wrist and he looks away, at the wall and then at the floor, his breath catching when she touches the scars. There’s that self-loathing again. She raises his arm to her lips, places a kiss to the scars there and his eyes snap to hers. The way he looks at her makes her wonder if he’s ever been shown a moment of kindness in his life. 

She’s actually caught off guard when he kisses her again, a little forcefully, his hand finding its way to her hair and fisting in it, tilting her head and pushing his tongue into her mouth with a passion and a certainty that makes her forget which Killian she’s with. His wrist comes around her hips, pulling her to him as she runs her hands over his chest, his back, his sides until he pulls back with a gasp. 

“Can I touch you again?” he asks, strained but without the hesitation from before.

“Yes,” she breathes. “You don’t have to ask.” 

He’s still hesitant when he brings his hand to her breast but she’s pretty sure it’s more about not knowing what to do than not believing he can or should. She’s already worked up and the heat of his skin on hers makes her whimper and he grows bolder, his touch becoming more insistent, more intent, playing with her nipple and sliding down the skin of her stomach, making it flutter under his fingers. 

His palm slides around to her back so he can pull her in closer again, covering her mouth with his and she groans, rolls her hips against his. A needy desperate sound escapes him as his hand slips lower, grabbing hold of her ass and pulling her harder against the ridge in his pants. 

She takes hold of his hips, turning him and leading him towards the bed at the back of the room. She pushes down on his shoulders, making him sit and smiles at the way he reaches for her with hand and wrist and lips when she pulls back. She kneels down in front of him, reaching for the laces of his leathers and he doesn’t stop her but he looks more nervous than he has yet. 

She finishes unlacing him and then reaches down to pull his boots off one at a time. He looks at her again in that way that breaks her heart, like he’s surprised by her kindness, by care. She reaches for the waist of his pants and slides them down slowly, still giving him a chance to change his mind. He lifts his hips to help her pull them off. He’s watching her now, naked and awaiting judgement, so she smiles at him, letting her tongue peek out to lick at her bottom lip and watching the desire flash in his eyes before she straightens a little so she can kiss him. 

His hand comes to her hair again but falls to the sheets beside him when she trails her lips down his neck, across his collarbone and down his chest to his stomach, the amazing, desperate sounds he’s making spurring her on. She can tell he’s right on the edge already, that it will only take a second to bring him to his climax and she knows that that might disappoint him - especially if he’s inside of her when it happens. 

So she takes him in hand and he cries out, falling to his elbows before her. She pumps him once before deciding to really give him something to cry out about and takes him into her mouth. He only tries to protest, for the sake of her honour, for a second before she wraps her lips around him and he loses all sense of words or thoughts. He curses, a slew of swears she’s heard and some she hasn’t, some she’s pretty sure are in another language, as she runs her lips and tongue over him. 

It’s barely a minute before he comes in her mouth and when she looks up at him he looks so blissed out, so boneless that she wants to laugh. But she doesn’t. She doesn’t want him to take it the wrong way. She caresses him gently, stroking his cock and his thighs and his stomach as he comes back to himself. Once the ecstasy has faded from his features though, disappointment takes its place and she frowns, confused. 

“What’s wrong?” she asks, and he avoids looking at her again. 

“I just - I mean I was hoping to… I wanted to make you… as well.. I thought…”

She understands then. Understands that he thinks this is over and that he wanted to be with her completely but doesn’t feel right asking for more. She smiles at him. 

“There’s still time for that,” she says and he perks up just a little. “And now, it’ll last longer so you can really enjoy it,” she tells him. He bites his lip and scratches his ear. 

“And you,” he starts. “Will you enjoy it?” he asks and she smiles. Always so considerate, her Killian. 

“Yes,” she tells him. “If you help me.”

“How?” he demands quickly, eagerly and he blushes at her smile. “I mean, it seems like bad form to leave a woman unsatisfied. Especially after that,” he explains. She raises an eyebrow at him. Not quite as suave as he usually is but not bad. 

“I -” he starts again. “I want to please you,” he confesses, but holds her gaze even as his cheeks burn. Her heart melts a little at this shy, nervous man fighting against his own anxiety to tell her that he wants to make her feel good. She really lucked out with Killian Jones, didn’t she?”

“Slide over,” she tells him, standing. He makes room for her on the bed and she lies down next to him, he on his side and she on her back. She takes his hand in hers again, toys with his fingers for a moment, with the familiar rings there, before bringing it to her breast once more. He’s less hesitant this time, quicker to act as he touches her, repeating some of the same brushes and flicks and pulls from before but watching her, weighing the sounds she makes and repeating the touches that make her gasp or cry out. What a quick study, she muses as she pulls his lips to hers again. 

He kisses her eagerly, deeply and wantonly as he touches her. His fingers continue to play with her nipple, sliding over to tease the other and then returning to the first. Emma’s skin is on fire. She’s squirming a little beneath him, heat pooling between her legs at his surprisingly talented ministrations and she’s pretty sure she’s going to go insane before she feels his hand slide down, between her breasts, over her stomach.

Yes, she practically moans. Good for him, she thinks with a smirk. His fingers reach her sex and she opens her legs for him, lets him slide between them and explore. His breath catches and then he groans with desperation, deepening his kiss when he feels her wet and hot under his hand. It’s a bit experimental, still unsure as he gets his bearings and Emma gives him time to figure it out, knowing this is the first time he’s touched a woman so intimately. 

He finds her opening and slides a finger in and her hand tightens in his hair. He pulls back and then pushes back in and Emma cries out, breaking their kiss as her head falls back against the pillow. He watches her with hooded eyes and swollen lips. He does it again and she cants her hips up against his hand. 

He continues in a steady rhythm, slowly, adding a second finger and checking for her reaction. She reaches down and pauses his movements, brings his thumb to her clit and circles it slowly. He looks at where he’s touching her, focused, lips parted and breathing heavy as she shows him how she likes to be touched. He follows her instructions willingly, so eager to please her, to bring her pleasure and she lets him go, lets him continue on his own. 

His thumb circles her, slowly building her higher and once he’s found his rhythm he begins pumping his fingers again at the same time. She lets out a choked moan and suddenly, somehow, she’s writhing under this shy deckhand and he’s watching her, lust burning in his eyes as he sees what he’s doing to her. 

His eyes rake over her, take a moment to watch, mesmerized, as his fingers disappear inside of her again and again, and then focus on her breasts, her nipples hard and stiff as she pants under him. He leans down, taking one in his mouth and holy fucking shit. 

She grabs at his hair, holding him in place as he swirls his tongue over the bud, his fingers continuing to drive her closer to the edge. She can feel him getting into it, encouraged by the litany of sounds escaping her, almost more excited at the idea of getting her off than he was at the idea of getting off himself, and he picks up his pace. 

Holy shit, she thinks as she feels the coil tightening inside of her, feels the sparks licking at her belly. Is she going to come from this? From his first go at it?

She feels him press against her thigh, hard and hot and swollen and she remembers that this is supposed to be about him. She forces herself to pull back and feels a little guilty when he looks disappointed and worried. 

“I’m sorry,” he says quickly. “I didn’t mean to - Did I do it wrong?”

“No,” she shakes her head. “Trust me, you did it very, very right,” she tells him, still panting. His chest puffs up a bit and she smiles. “I just - want you,” she tells him and desire and lust darken his eyes, even as they mingle with the nervousness. 

“Oh,” he breathes. “Okay.” 

She pushes him onto his back feeling the rise and fall of his chest and the pounding of his heart under it. She lifts one leg slowly over him so that she can straddle him and his hand and wrist come to rest on her hips. They’re shaking and she asks him if he’s sure because he looks so scared. 

“We don’t have to if you don’t want to,” she reminds him. “Or if you’re not ready.”

He shakes his head. “No, I want to,” he tells her. “I just… Gods, Emma, you’re so beautiful, and strong and brave and I’m -” 

“Beautiful,” she cuts him off. “Handsome. And kind, and sweet, and brave.” He’s going to protest so she leans over him and kisses him so that he can’t. 

She pulls back, kissing his neck again for a moment before she rises over him and takes him in her hand, lining him up with her entrance and sinking down over him. The sound he makes when her hips meet his isn’t one she’s ever heard him make before and also not one she thinks she’ll ever hear again, so she tries to remember it, the ecstasy and the wonder and the desperation. 

She gives him a moment, not moving, letting him enjoy the feeling of being inside her and watching him enjoy it. When he’s calmed a little, stopped whimpering softly with each breath, and his breathing is nearly back to normal, he looks at her and she waits. He nods, hand squeezing her hip and she starts moving. She goes slowly so that he can enjoy it and so that it’s not over too quickly. He may have come already but this is still his first time and she’s not expecting the kind of marathons they usually have. 

He lets her take control, going back and forth between watching her in awe and throwing his head back against the pillow. She enjoys both, likes the way his eyes rake over her, seeing how much he wants her, and liking the way the muscles in his neck stretch and tense as his jaw clenches and his mouth falls open. 

And the sounds he makes, god the sounds. Killian has always been vocal in bed, but it's usually words, praise and filth and encouragements. But these sounds, they’re raw and primal and desperate and she revels in them, each one shooting through her like a shock to her core. 

She debates bringing his hand to her clit again, but he’s so lost in his pleasure, his fingers digging into her hip so hard that she doesn’t think he could manage it right now. So she does it herself, touching herself and watching his face as she does. She so rarely gets to see him like this, he’s always been more of a giver than a taker but she loves the moments when he lets her worship him the way he always does her. 

He looks down at her hand between them, sees her fingers circling her clit and his lip pulls back over his teeth, desperate, needy breaths and gasps leaving him as it spurs him on, his hips rocking up into hers and she knows he’s close but she’s nearly there too. He’s holding out longer than she expected and she realises when she sees it in his eyes, when he brings a hand to her breast, rolls her nipple between his fingers that he’s trying to let her finish first. 

Always a gentleman, she muses. But between his hand on her and her fingers on her clit and the way he’s pulling her against him, pushing himself deeper, finding spots he shouldn’t be able to, it's not long before her back is bowing, hand falling to his chest, fisting at the hair there as she cries out. 

He sits up, wrapping his arms around her as she shakes, even as she continues to move over him and the change of angle sends another wave of pleasure through her. She sees his reaction when she clenches and flutters around him seconds before he cries out, burying his head in her neck and pulling her more tightly against him so that they’re flush from chest to hips. 

He’s shaking, trembling in her arms as his breath comes out in soft whimpers against her skin. She brushes her fingers through his damp hair, holding him tightly and turning her head to press kisses to his temple, his ear, his cheekbone, soothing him. 

When he stops shaking he pulls back but only enough so that he can cup her cheek and kiss her again, really kiss her. His lips slide over hers, tongue pushing past and licking into her mouth, panting against her as he nips and sucks at her lips. She’s dizzy by the time he finally breaks the kiss, presses his forehead to hers and closes his eyes, fingers still fisted in her hair.

“Thank you,” he says, low in his throat and she laughs. 

“You don’t have to thank me for that,” she assures him. 

“That was…” he pauses, searching for the right word. “Extraordinary.” She laughs softly and he lifts his face from hers, looks at her with wide eyes. “Was it… did you… enjoy it? I mean, it seemed like you did but-”

“I did,” she assures him. “A lot.” He looks at her with a slightly raised brow. “You were very good at it,” she tells him and can see the pride growing in his chest. 

“I understand now,” he says and she cocks her head. “Why the French call it the little death. Surely I must have touched a piece of heaven, held a goddess in my arms.” She wants to laugh but this is the most fluent, the most Killian-like he’s sounded since she met him and it warms her heart to hear him speak without self doubt or hesitation. 

“I felt… it felt like…” he looks at her. “Have we done this before?” he asks. “In your world?”

She nods. “Yes. Many, many times. And you’ll remember it soon.” 

“Can we do it again?” he asks eagerly and she laughs. 

“I think we’ll have to wait, unfortunately, until we get home. Henry is going to start wondering where we are.” 

He nods, a little disappointed but understanding. “Well then, I look forward to returning to your reality. One where I’m somehow, someone worthy of a heroine, a saviour like you.”

“Stop that,” she says, taking his face in her hands and kissing him. She caresses his cheeks with her thumbs. “You were a hero today. You risked your life to help Henry save me. You were brave and you were noble. No coward could have done that.” 

His breath catches but he doesn’t protest despite the embarrassment on his face. She kisses him again and she can tell he’s trying to hang on to her, hang on to the moment just a little longer as he follows her lips, his fingers trailing down her back and then down her arm as she slowly rises from the bed and begins getting dressed. 

“I love you,” she hears him whisper from the bed behind her and it's so low she knows he didn’t mean for her to hear it. She knows, of course she knows. But she lets him pretend she didn’t hear, lets him keep his secret, knows that when she does say it, she needs to say it to the real him. 

She wishes she could stay, that she could lay here in bed with him and hold him, that she didn’t have to get up and walk away, save the world as always. But she does. They have a curse to break and a family to save and a world to put right. Tomorrow, when this is over and done with, when this is hopefully over and done with, she’ll spend the entire day in bed with him, won't let him go until whatever the next crisis is forces her to leave his side. And she’ll tell him. She’ll tell him that she loves him. But that can wait until tomorrow. 

[nuricurry]

Saint Seiya | Hyoga/Ikki; “don’t paint me black when i used to be golden” PG-13

He’s got a flat in Omsk that uses when he needs to run away. It’s small, above a little corner shop, selling liquor and cigarettes and stale chips. It’s where he buys his rolling papers, because the babushka that owns it never asks about his age. She just likes when he’s around, because he looks like her son who went off to die in the war, and he lifts heavy boxes for her and sweeps the stairs without her asking. The room smelled old, but that was mostly because of the books that filled it, crammed into the huge bulky bookcases that Hyoga managed to squeeze in until the shelves sagged and it looked as if they might tip over. Most of the books he’d never read; they were in languages he didn’t speak, Croatian and German and Gaelic and Italian, books about science and the stars and plants and trees, books that talked about wars he had never heard of and places most of the world long-since forgot existed. They were books he had run his fingers over hundreds of times in his life, books that he could remember seeing as a child, all neatly ordered and carefully arranged. In his house, they were fit where they could, shoved on top of each other and stacked on tables and chairs, none of them given the proper place they should. He brought Shun there once, when they were caught between figuring themselves out and needing company. He remembered what he looked like in that small room with it’s peeling blue floral wallpaper and water stained ceiling. His eyes had traveled around, taking it all in-- Hyoga’s unmade bed, his chipped china, the dusty lace curtains that hung in the window-- and he had smiled at him and said it was lovely. What was funny was that he knew he meant it; where Hyoga saw chaos and mess, Shun saw a home, filled with things that Hyoga wanted to hold on to, things that clearly meant something, if he bought a whole apartment to put them in, rather than let them be thrown away. They shared the bed at night, him and Shun, because there was only one and they were beyond a point of awkwardness or shame in being close to one another. They would lie on the mattress on their sides, face to face, and Shun would listen to him talk. He would tell him about how his mother gave birth to him in Moscow, but she grew up here in Omsk and he had come here hoping to find some family of his, only to learn they had all moved away or died. The house she lived in was gone, turned into a shopping center, and the only record to be found was of her was her name at the local church and the day of her baptism. They talked about the books, all collected from the cabin he lived in with Camus out in the wilderness for those eight years. He couldn’t read them all, and honestly, many of them he didn’t want to, because he was never as analytical as Camus was. He didn’t really need to know how the world worked and why it did. He just lived in the moment, he just had to make it through each day, and that was enough for him. Yet, even knowing so many of them would never be opened again, he couldn’t bear to throw any of them away. Camus had touched them at some point, his eyes had scanned them over, which meant Hyoga couldn’t get rid of a single one of them, in memory of him. That was what the apartment really was for, when it came down to it. Storing his memories, trying to hold onto them and make them last by locking them away, as if that would keep them fresh, keep them safe. Shun, as he knew he would be, was sympathetic. He didn’t discourage his hoarding, didn’t criticize or encourage him to put those sorts of things aside. He just held his hand when Hyoga spoke about how he liked when the old lady downstairs called him ‘Pasha’ because it was like having a grandmother for the first time, he offered to get him a drink when Hyoga would get a headache from crying, he wouldn’t say anything about the creaking floorboards and lumpy mattress and leaking pipes and paper-thin walls of Hyoga’s glorified memory box. He just told him it felt like home, and offered to bring him new sheets and maybe a nice rug and a plant to liven up the space. Shun said those things because Hyoga didn’t tell him the whole truth. Shun didn’t know about the box under the bed, the box of Camus’ clothes that he kept tucked away under lock and key. He didn’t tell him about keeping his coat, his shirts, his gloves, because they were things that Camus had worn and touched, they still held traces of his distinctive scent. He didn’t tell him that the chipped dishes they used at dinner used to be his mother’s rescued from the remains of her sunken ship years ago and hoarded in his room where no one could find them. He didn’t mention the book that had dog-eared pages about the Kraken and sirens and Leviathan, creased and folded over by what must have been a young Isaak’s hand. He didn’t tell him about how he kept those things because he believed that they might have even traces of those he lost, a bit of their smell, a strand of their hair, even fingerprints would have been enough, because it was physical proof that they had been alive, that they existed and that once, Hyoga had been able to love someone without being afraid of that love destroying them. It wasn’t like that anymore. Hyoga had learned his lesson, had learned it in the hardest way possible. The only person who knew about Camus’ clothes and his mother’s china and Isaak’s book was Ikki. He had found the box by accident, one time when he came to the flat broken and bleeding, uncovering it when he was left alone after Hyoga went downstairs to ask for a needle and thread to sew up the wound. Ikki claimed he had been trying to find bandages when he pulled out the box. He asked about it, because it was strange for Hyoga to have a box of clothes he never wore that would never fit him, delicate painted tea cups, and a tattered book of fairytales hidden away in a box under his bed. He didn’t know why he told him-- it was not as if Ikki was ever sensitive about those things, not like Shun was-- but maybe it was because he wasn’t Shun or Seiya that he told him. Ikki was not someone who would look at him with pity when he talked about imagining that the books paper had absorbed some of Isaak’s spit from licking his fingers to turn the page, or wanting to find even traces of his mother’s fingerprints on the teapot, or about wearing Camus’ coat because it was the closest he would ever get to being held in his arms again, now that the man himself was gone. Ikki just took in all that information, he just listened, his face impassive, his eyes unreadable, before he closed the chest, and put it back under the bed. The next time Ikki was in the flat was when Hyoga brought him there because they needed to get away from everything and everyone, because he had finally talked about the fire that burned under his skin every time he was within any proximity to Ikki and Ikki echoed those words back. He hadn’t been thinking about the chest, the memories, the mementos; he was thinking about finally trying to work this fever out, but before he could, Ikki asked to see the box, and Hyoga dragged it out for him, though he didn’t understand why. Ikki pulled something out of the inner pocket of his jacket, and placed it in the box, right on top of Hyoga’s things. It was a handkerchief, and when he gently pulled up the corner of it, he saw a dried, pressed flower tucked inside. Ikki put his past inside of Hyoga’s memory box, and he let him, because he knew how much it hurt to carry around the love he knew killed someone. Maybe he thought it would bring them closer. Maybe he just wanted Ikki to find some illusion of comfort and peace like he had, forcing himself to think that compartmentalizing something meant it no longer affected him, when in fact the opposite was true. Maybe he just liked knowing that part of Ikki would always be within his reach, even if that was a part of him he had cut out, like one cuts out a tumor and puts it in a jar to sit on a shelf, a reminder of how terrible life can go, and how short it all is, subjected to the whims and forces of fate. Ikki comes to his flat in Omsk more than anyone else, and it becomes a place that Hyoga defines as ‘for them’. Parts of Ikki’s life navigate their way there, from socks and spare shoes to keys to his bike, and a case of his favorite beer always available in the fridge. They stay there, in the winter, and sometimes in the summer, when they’re allowed to get away and no one is asking anything of them, when they’ve paid their dues and given all there is to give. They eat overpriced takeout at the rickety table, they fuck on Hyoga’s lumpy bed, they sleep side by side together, and when he wakes up in the morning, sometimes Ikki’s still there. They brush their teeth in the same sink and Ikki’s leather jacket hangs on a hook next to the doorway, but lingers there more often than it’s missing, and it feels fragile, like a snowflake made from spun glass, but he holds onto it, as one of the few things he has that he desperately, so badly, doesn’t want to break. But wanting things doesn’t mean they happen. Trying to be better, trying to forget that he has destroyed every person he’s ever loved, does not stop it from happening again. 

They fight. They argue. Hyoga asks him for things that Ikki won’t give him-- things he says he can’t. Ikki snaps at him. He reaches his breaking point louder than Hyoga does. “Just sit here and rot in your fucking mausoleum, Hyoga,” he tells him before he leaves, and Hyoga knows he won’t come back. So he picks up his jacket, his fingers slipping easily over the familiar, creamy texture of the leather. He holds it, he smells it, he tries to find any traces of Ikki’s heat, of his hair or his skin, undeniable proof that this was his, that he lived and breathed in this jacket, and that he existed in a world that Hyoga lived in too, inside this flat. Then, he folds it, putting new creases in the jacket before he puts it in his box, tucking it under his bed with all the other things that belong to the people he destroyed simply by loving them. 

[piccolina-mina]

But Who Takes Care of You?

Fandom: Roswell, New Mexico 

Pairing/Characters: Kyle Valenti and Maria DeLuca (Kyluca) 

Inspo: Who takes care of the caretakers? 

A/N: Because the show really needs to let Kyluca be great (preferably better than this, but it’s something). 

They’re the best apart, and they’d be even better together if they ever got more screentime. It’s a random freestyle I wasn’t sure if I would share, but #KylucaRights.:)

~~~~ 

i.

The desert air made him instantly feel at home.

The sun beamed down as he inhaled deeply and ignored the jostle of folks scurrying in and out of the airport.

“Ay Guapo!”

He didn’t have to see her to recognize the voice. His lip curled up into a genuine smile. His eyes darted around him until he saw her standing a few feet ahead holding a “Dr. McSexy” sign and smirking at him.

He sauntered over to her, his carry on in tow, and pulled his sunglasses off when he got closer.

“Are you posing? Rubbing it in with those cheekbones,” she snorted. “Every time I see you, you get hotter, Valenti.”

Maria flashed him that stunning smile that made him return one in kind.

“I would say the same, but you’ve always been hot. A little hard to improve on perfection.”

She rolled her eyes but grinned widely and before he realized it, he was wrapped up in her arms.

He squeezed her back, basked in her scent of sandalwood and vanilla, and the shea and coconut that clung to her hair.

They hugged for what felt like an eternity, but it was only a few moments.

He didn’t know when it happened exactly. He and Maria socialized in school, but they were never particularly close.

He was more than aware of how much of an ass he was back then, and she didn’t hesitate to remind him. Rosa’s death changed everything.

Their world tilted on its axis. He never anticipated how one tragedy could change the trajectory of their lives.

He didn’t know Rosa enough to feel like he lost her, but he lost Liz. Those years after were life-altering.

Any opportunity he had to make it back home, outside of his mother, the only constant was Maria. She was there, and familiar, and somehow they developed a bond over the years.

She kept up with his life on social media – the graduation ceremonies, the late-night bitching during residency, and her personal favorite thirst posts on Instagram.

He kept up with her too. She told him things his mother never did and updated him on old friends, like Alex. 

He visited her at the Pony when he was in town, and sometimes they would catch a movie at the drive-in and reminisce on the old days. Mainly, they would imagine what Liz Ortecho was up to.

“I thought you were driving?” Maria squinted up at him. She nudged him until he started walking, and it was only when they neared her truck did he realize she was driving him.

“I planned on it, but I got called into the hospital early at the last minute,” he stopped at her car and leaned against it taking in his surroundings and smiling fondly.

“Admit it, you were homesick and wanted out of Iowa,” Maria teased. She raised a brow daring him to refute.

“It was very cold and very white.”

Her laugh was contagious, and he found himself joining in with her.

“I just told mom before I boarded the flight. How’d you find out I was coming in early?”

“I’m psychic, remember?” She winked at him playfully, and he couldn’t stop grinning.

Maria always had that effect. She had a way of making everyone around her smile. She was comforting and real, and he never realized how much he missed her energy until he was sucked back into her orbit.

“You didn’t have to come for me,” he said quietly. “I know my way home.”

She shrugged, signaled for him to toss his luggage in the back and disappeared into the driver seat before he could read her expression.

He took his time arranging his luggage and sliding into the passenger seat. He sensed she needed a moment to regroup and put on that fun-loving facade he adored but knew she clung to more than she let on.

“Seriously, Maria. I know you’re busy,” he said carefully.

She reached out now and then for inquiries. His mother was the one who told him about Mimi’s mental deterioration, how she had bad days, and Maria juggled the Pony and looking after her mom.

He tried not to pry, but from what he knew, no one could figure out what was wrong.

“All work and no fun makes Maria a dull girl,” she drummed her fingers against the steering wheel as they waited for the cars ahead of them to pull off.

“I take off on special occasions,” she honked her horn, and he winced at the person flipping the bird back at them.

“I’m a special occasion?”

He went for sly, but something about the way her eyebrow rose equal parts impressed and flirty gave him the impression it sounded more suggestive than he intended.

But Maria always gave as good as she got.

“Only if you’re lucky, Valenti. You’re not that lucky.”

“The Insta comments say otherwise,” he teased her.

She shot him an annoyed look utterly ruined by her scrunched up mouth as she tried to keep from laughing.

Finally, a break in the traffic and Maria shot forward. He gripped the seat and instantly recalled her penchant for going above the speed limit.

“It feels like a special occasion anytime anyone makes it back home.” She was serious, and something about the tone of her voice made him want to squeeze her hand, but he refrained.

“Everyone deserves a welcome wagon, Kyle.”

‘It doesn’t get any warmer.“ He tilted his head to the side and added. “Thanks to you.”

And in a quintessential Maria move, she turned up the volume. He didn’t contain his excitement when the car flooded with Regulate.

Somewhere between the highway and his mother’s house they ended up in a heated rap battle sing-along, and he didn’t care what Maria said, he won.

Returning home came with its share of memories, many of them painful.

But it came with friends too.

ii.

 "Right or wrong. Don’t it turn you on–“

“Maria?!” He called out. The second he unlocked his apartment, her voice bounced across the no longer bare and no longer white walls.

“Can’t you see we’re wastin’ time, yeah,” she continued.

From the way she was swinging her hips and bobbing her head, he suspected her music was up too high for her to hear him.

“Maria!’ He called out louder, as he dropped his keys on the counter and shut the door behind him.

"Do you wanna touch …Yeah.”

“Maria!’ He tried again to no avail. He had to give it to her; she was committed. Her long legs and short overalls were splattered in paint.

She had her hair piled on top of her head in a messy bun, and she was retouching a small spot with the last of the paint.

He leaned against the kitchen island and for the first time took in his apartment. She had rearranged his furniture, finally putting it in place after far too long spent collecting dust in the first place the movers sat it down.

All of his boxes were emptied, and everything was seemingly put away. Instead of the college frat boy vibe happening from the moment he moved in, his place looked every bit the trendy bachelor pad that it was.

"Do you wanna touch– FUCK, Kyle!”

Maria spun around mid-dance move, and if he didn’t literally know any better, he would have thought he gave her a heart attack.

“You scared the shit out of me,” she tossed the paintbrush into the pan and swiped hair away from her forehead.

“Funny you should say that,” he tried to suppress his laughter, but it didn’t work. She rolled her eyes at him and plucked her earbuds out of her ears.

“I had the same reaction given there was someone else in my apartment. It’s been a while since I came home to a woman playing house.”

“See, this is the kind of tea I like to hear, and yet you keep withholding.”

He shook his head and padded to the refrigerator for a drink. Halfway through guzzling an iced tea, he noticed she was actually serious about her statement.

He made his way around the island until he was in front of her. Handed her a bottle and rested against the back of the couch.

“Fine, she was a live-in girlfriend for a year. She worked at the hospital too.”

Maria squealed. He found her way too thrilled about his love life, but who was he to deny her the small joys of gossip when she had done so much for him?

“Did she greet you at the door with a martini in hand?” She joked.

“Nah, usually she was naked,” he winked at her.

“Hate to disappoint you, Valenti, but I took a more practical approach.”

He softened staring around his apartment and all the changes she made.

His mother had got on his case for weeks about making his apartment into a home, but between work and sleep, he hadn’t gotten around to it.

She bought the paint, deliberately pushed boxes into the middle of the floor and hoped it would be enough to prompt him to get to work, but two months later, his apartment wasn’t that different than when he moved in.

Until now.

He didn’t recognize the curtains framing the windows or the area rugs, but given the color and flair, he knew it was all Maria.

His kitchen appliances were where they should have been. Throw pillows made his leather couch pop, and the tv no longer sat atop sturdy boxes but rather an actual stand.

For the first time, his apartment actually felt like home.

“Maria,” his dark eyes met hers, and he could hear the emotion in his voice. He tried to keep it at bay as he internally processed why this touched him so much.

“You didn’t have to do this,” his eyes landed on a frame on a shelf, a picture of his father, and his mother’s rosary resting over it.

He pulled Maria to him with one arm before she could react. He pressed his lips to her hair before clearing his throat and stepping away.

“You really didn’t-”

“Hey,” her eyes sparkling like glitter was the only indication she gave him that she was emotional too. “It’s no big deal. The Wild Pony flooded today, damn pipe burst, so I’m losing a day and a half. I needed the distraction.”

She cupped his face tenderly, flashing him a half-smile before giving him a light smack, breaking the spell.

“It was getting depressing, Kyle. Two months of your shit lying around, if I didn’t do it, would you ever have gotten around to it?”

“You sound like my mother. I have my doubts, but I’m guessing that’s how you got in?”

“Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to,” she sing-songed backing up. “And you may want to enhance your security, just an FYI. I’d hook you up with my handy guy, but you two always had bad blood.”

He snorted. Not much changed between him and Michael Guerin since high school, but apparently, Maria developed a soft spot for the broody cowboy over the years.

“Hey, mind if a grab a quick shower before dinner?”

She asked, but it wasn’t lost on him that she was already headed towards the master bath.

She clearly had made herself at home.

“Why start asking now?” He plopped on the couch, finally getting the chance to put his feet up and relax after hours spent in the OR.

“Did you say dinner?” He bellowed from the couch.

“It’s on the way. I’m starving, and you’re paying. Don’t forget to tip,” she called out.

She peeked out from his bedroom dangling one of his workout shirts.

He could have sworn they were still packed in a box that morning, which meant Maria unpacked his bedroom too. The thought of that should have concerned him, but he pushed it out of his mind.

“I’m borrowing this!” Her head disappeared before he could so much as respond, and he chuckled to himself.

Before he knew it, he was tipping the delivery boy from his favorite BBQ joint, and Maria was setting up dinner in front of the big screen.

She smelled like his body wash, and she curled up on the couch next to him, cross-legged in his oversized shirt, and he didn’t even want to think about what of his she borrowed as bottoms.

“What’s your pleasure, D? Rom-com?” He took a bite of his brisket sandwich and hummed in appreciation.

“I know, right? The good stuff.” She mirrored him, a healthy bite making her cheeks bulge. “I don’t sniff at a good rom-com, but it’s an action kind of night.”

“Thank God,” he kicked his feet up on the coffee table and grabbed the remote. To his surprise, it was already keyed up for one of the Mission Impossibles.

“It’s OK, you don’t have to say it. I know I’m the best.”

He stole a french fry off her plate and laughed when she swatted his hand away. After a while, they settled into a comfortable silence watching the movie.

Truthfully, she really was.

iii.

On the anniversary of his father’s death, he learned to throw himself into work.

In the early days, in his youth, he would toy with a bottle of whiskey, roll the top between his fingers. He would inhale, slow and deep and wonder if he’d find a reason for why he had to lose his father so early in the bottom of a bottle.

He thought it would bring them closer together … him closer to understanding the man who he worshipped and ached for every day.

His father found answers at the bottom of a bottle, why couldn’t he?

But it was a slippery slope, and he knew that.

He’s not an addict, but he could be, and the thought of slipping into the darkness scares the hell out of him.

So he directed his energy into something else, usually picking up other shifts. And while he and his mother checked in with each other, their grieving processes were different.

He never gave it much thought. He didn’t want to intrude.

But when he got a text from Maria, he realized maybe, since he was home again, it was time to grieve together.

The Wild Pony was packed, as usual, and he felt out of place in his scrubs he didn’t bother to change out of.

He glanced around, afraid of what he might find. Maria reassured him in brief texts, but that day he wouldn’t get any comfort until he saw his mother for himself.

Maria was serving up drinks with a tired smile, and when her eyes met his from across the room, she nodded.

He followed her gaze to the back of the Pony. His mother was in her street clothes. Her hair was loose and obscuring her face – a black curtain falling over her eyes and dipping into what appeared to be a lukewarm cup of coffee in front of her.

He sighed. The other drunks and regulars didn’t seem to notice her or him for that matter. His father got away with a lot, but he doubted his mother as a female sheriff could. Small towns meant lots of gossiping.

“Mom,” he squatted down in front of her, his knees groaning with the action after a long shift. “Let me take you home, mom.”

She looked at him with bleary eyes and tear-stained cheeks. She didn’t see him at first. It was like she was looking through him, but when he folded her hands into his, she finally did.

She didn’t say a word; she merely nodded and reached out to stroke his jaw.

The only thing that rivaled the sadness in her eyes was the shame. She stood and grabbed his arm like it was the last thing keeping her from drowning. When he saw how broken she appeared, he thought maybe he was.

“Take me home, perrito,” her voice was hoarse, barely a whisper as they shuffled toward the door.

He pressed a kiss to the side of her head and bit his lip to keep from crying. The burning warmth on the side of his face as he guided his mother through huddled bodies was like its own hug.

Maria eyed him from behind the bar her brows knit in concern and mouthed, ‘Are you OK” or something akin to it.

A curt nod was all he could muster before they slipped out.

The drive to his childhood home was short, but the process of getting his mother settled down was long.

She refused to sleep in her bed– the bed she shared with his father for years. She settled on the couch, and after he slipped into some old clothes of his lying around, he did too.

She slumped into his lap and curled up on the couch like a small child. He could still smell the stale beer and gin. He stroked her hair – his nimble fingers ghosting across her forehead and pressed a cool compress to her neck.

The blinking light on his phone caught his eye, and he checked his messages.

Maria texted once to ask if he was alright and called once too.

He wasn’t alright. He was far from it, but there was nothing that could be done. His father’s old clock sounded, and it was only then when he realized it was past midnight.

But it was too late; his fingers worked of their own volition calling Maria before he could think.

“Hello,” she sounded tired but also concerned. The whooshing in the background meant she was driving home for the night.

“Kyle,” she breathed. He looked down at his mother softly snoring in his lap, and then the photo on the coffee table, a family portrait, but he couldn’t bring himself to respond.

“It’s OK,” her voice was soft and soothing. “You don’t have to talk. I promise I won’t hang up.”

His eyes prickled with tears he had managed to restrain all day. A gurgled sound crawled up his throat, and he inhaled sharp surprised the choked sob came from him.

He pressed the heel of his palm to his eyes trying to staunch the dam, but it was no use.

He could hear Maria hum soothingly, but it only made him cry more.

And that was how they stayed. He heard her car stop, the sound of the key scratching against the door. He heard her breathing as she went about her nightly routine.

He heard the water running, the soft creak of her climbing into bed, her sighs as her body relaxed after a long day.

“Thank you,” his voice was hoarse as he whispered into the phone, but at least his words were back. “Thank you for letting me know.”

“Of course, Kyle,” she sighed into the phone. “How is she doing?”

“Resting,” he whispered, not wanting to rouse her.

“How are you?”

The question caught him short. He exhaled slow, but it didn’t make his voice sound any less small and fragile. “I miss him,” he said honestly. “We both do.”

“I know,” Maria whispered back. “I know.”

And he knew she did. Her mother was still alive, but it was like she wasn’t there at all. Sometimes he wondered if that would feel worse; missing someone who was still there.

“I need to do better – be better,” he stroked his mother’s hair and bit back another strangled sob. “I’ve been so busy. We don’t check-in enough, and I–”

“You’re a good son, Kyle,” Maria yawned into the phone. “She talked about you nonstop, and she still does. She’s so proud of you.”

He sniffled and nodded his head, looking down at the woman in his lap. “Maybe so, but I should – ” he cleared his throat. “I just need to do a better job taking care of her too.”

“And you do, Ky…” Maria mumbled into the phone. Her speech slowed down as she struggled to stave off the slumber but failed. “But who takes care of you?”

He listened to her soft snores over the phone for a moment – the breathing of both women oddly relaxing him.

“Goodnight, Maria,” he whispered into the phone hanging up and succumbing to his own exhaustion.

iv.

He learned over the years that Maria had a knack for scaring the shit out of him, but it wasn’t until later he realized it wasn’t intentional on her part.

Somewhere between jamming out to his playlist and waiting for a gaggle of tourists to cross the town square, his passenger door opened unexpectedly.

Before he could so much as yelp in surprise, Maria slid in all flowy skirt and a hint of sandalwood.

“Shit! Maria, what –” one glance in her direction stopped him cold.

“Just drive, please,” her voice was raspy as if she had been crying, but he saw no traces of it.

“You want to talk about it?” He asked gently.

She placed bare feet up on the dash, her skirt billowing around her knees, and he refrained from lecturing her on the pitfalls of being in such a position if they ended up in an accident.

“No,” she said quietly. She pressed her face to the window and hugged herself.

He reached across the console and fastened her seatbelt for her, and turned the music up.

He didn’t know what was troubling her, but he understood the need for distraction.

He didn’t pry, but he did sing-a-long to his Latin mix badly. He could make Spanish sound the opposite of sexy when he made an effort, and while she didn’t join in, her lips would turn up just a tad during a particularly bad note. Her eyes were dark pools of sadness though.

She didn’t budge when he dropped letters off at the post office. She stared at the mechanizations of the car wash with that childlike wonder one never seemed to lose.

She tipped the young pimply-faced teen drying the car before he could dig out more singles, but she never said a word.

It was like he was on his own and Maria was his shadow.

She hopped out when it was time to go inside the grocery store. She tagged along like a bored kid, except she wasn’t so much bored as unusually quiet and distracted, with her mind a million miles away.

“I can feel your judgment from here,” he joked when he put a dozen frozen dinners into the basket.

“Inquiring minds want to know how are you a doctor with a body like that,” she gestured at him. “Living off of frozen dinners?”

“They’re quick, easy, and delicious. Don’t act like you don’t eat this shit too.” He tossed a box of Easy Mac into the basket and glowered.

“I’m poor, Kyle. Of course, I eat this shit,” she countered throwing two boxes of Pop-Tarts in with the other groceries.

“I’m poor too,” he smirked at her dubious expression. “Student loans.”

She nodded. “Touchè.”

To his surprise, shopping with Maria became an adventure. She tossed more crap into the cart, most of which he snuck out when she wasn’t looking.

She was a natural haggler too. She charmed the butcher into giving her, well, him, a deal on a couple of steaks which she promised to make for their next movie night.

They only had one mishap when he accidentally hit the back of her ankles with the cart, and he almost saw his life flash before his eyes when she glared at him.

They settled on a pint of ice cream, he caved to cookie dough because he promised her it would make her feel better, and they snagged a few spoons from the hot food bar before hitting the register.

She opted for the self-checkout, and he figured out it was for the best when she dug through her huge purse for a handful of coupons she knew she had in there.

He wasn’t a coupon person, and it embarrassed him a bit until he saved 13 bucks. He could live with Maria’s smug response after that.

She was lighter and happier, the Maria he was most familiar with by the time they settled down on a park bench to relax and share their pint.

An ensuing war over a coveted chunk of cookie dough led to a spoon battle and his utensil falling to its death in a pile of dirt.

“Mine!” She crowed claiming the piece.

He couldn’t resist laughing at her victory dance as she hummed in satisfaction at the sweet confectionery goodness melting on her tongue.

She didn’t see him coming when he plucked her spoon out of her mouth, dove into the pint and shoveled a hunk of ice cream into his.

“Hey, asshole!” She shrieked ignoring the dirty look a mother with her children shot her way.

“Sharing is caring,” he said around a mouthful of ice cream.

She rolled her eyes, snatched the spoon and pint back and went to town.

“This is the most fun I’ve had adulting in a long time,” he admitted truthfully.

“That’s because adulting isn’t meant to be fun,” she shrugged. The smile on her lips settled into a hard line.

“Let’s hear it, Maria.” He gently knocked his shoulder into hers. “Not that I didn’t enjoy you practically hijacking my car today, but what’s wrong?”

“They still don’t know what’s wrong with her,” she whispered. “Another specialist. More money that I don’t have spent, and no answer.”

She met his eyes briefly, and he saw the tears she was fighting back. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and offered a comforting squeeze.

“Maria, I can loan you–” he started even though he felt her tense beside him.

“No, Kyle. I can’t. You’ve helped me enough. Your colleague back in Iowa at least didn’t treat me like a crazy person or treat Mimi like an inconvenience. He was good, kind, and a breath of fresh air.

God knows I’ve run into my fair share of assholes. Not to mention the entire healthcare system is fucked…” she sighed.

He clenched his jaw as it pulsated with his own frustration. “Trust me, I know better than anyone.”

“It’s just every day I feel like I’m losing more of her,” she stared at a young mother helping a toddler climb on a plastic turtle.

“I know it seems like I …” she blew out a puff of air and distracted herself with stirring the remnants of ice cream until it became soupy.

“Losing pieces of her is like losing myself,” she shrugged. “She’s my compass, and she grounds me, without it – without her, I’m lost.”

He nodded. He understood that feeling after his father died.

“I think it’s incredible, the way you take care of Mimi…” he knew she didn’t always take compliments well, but he didn’t consider it a compliment so much as the truth. “It’s hard, and I can’t even begin to imagine, but I admire you, Maria. I hope you know that.”

She didn’t respond. She looked away instead, but he saw the way her cheeks were the slightest tinge of red.

“You take care of your mom, and you feed the community every month, and … ” he sighed, frustrated for his friend. “You need to let someone take care of you some time.”

“I’m a big girl, Kyle,” she went for light and flashed him that irresistible smile. “I can take care of myself.”

He wanted to add that she shouldn’t always have to, but in addition to knowing how hypocritical that would be of him, he sensed she wanted to drop the topic.

So he did.

“I’ll deny it later, and don’t let it get to your head, but I’m glad you’re back, Kyle.”

He chuckled, snatched the ice cream soup out of her hand and downed it.

“I am too,” he said after a while.

And he was.

v.

There were days when his job was the worst in the world.

Losing a patient never got easier, and no amount of experience could make delivering the news to the family less difficult.

His chest still ached from a pummel of fists hitting him as he eased a sobbing woman to the waiting room floor and held her.

His skin was blotchy and bruise. It was tender to the touch, but he welcomed the pain.

The pain reminded him that he was still alive, but it also reminded him that his patient wasn’t.

It took him a while to find a routine – something to direct all his energy towards in those dark moments.

Otherwise, the darkness would consume him. It would take a toll on him, but more importantly, it would interfere with his ability to be effective at his job.

He could never risk that; it was too important to him.

He retreated into himself. He declined the offers for drinks or dinner. He hit the gym and worked himself out until he collapsed, and then worked himself out some more.

Angry beats, a cacophony of harsh lyrics, blared in his ears as his feet slapped hard against the treadmill.

Sharp jabs against a punching bag until his knuckles were sore. 

Shadowboxing, more often than not, was easier on his hands; but sometimes he wanted to punish them for failing. For not healing. For allowing someone’s life to slip through their fingers.

He knew there was nothing he could have done, but feelings aren’t logical.

Then he hit the showers, hot water at a punishing setting sluicing against his skin in rivulets.

He drove home in silence, and sometimes he prayed and hoped the next day would be better.

On particularly hard days, an anguished scream would claw its way up to his throat, and he would cry. The echos of distraught family members and friends haunted him.

He would throw on a reality cooking competition and eat a frozen dinner until he fell asleep.

Everyone had their process.

His was almost complete until he arrived home and saw the kitchen light on over the stove.

He cursed to himself when he dropped the keys on the counter. He couldn’t… be if his mother dropped in.

She knew what it was like losing a person, but her way of coping differed from his.

“I know you probably don’t want to talk,” Maria came out of the bathroom not the least bit surprised by his appearance.

“I heard … that accident,” she wiped her hands down her sides to get off the remaining moisture. “I’m not staying. I just brought you something to eat.”

He was frozen in place, and he couldn’t meet her eyes. “Thanks,” he responded sharply.

He didn’t trust himself to say more, and fortunately, Maria seemed to understand.

He dropped his gym bag on the floor beside him.

His hair was still dripping from the shower, and his body already ached, and he just wanted to fall face-first into the couch, but he couldn’t bring himself to move.

The intrusion threw him all out of wack. Any move could lead to him being more vulnerable than he wanted to be in anyone’s presence, even hers.

But then there was something about her presence …

“I’m heading out now,” she said softly. “Text me later.”

She gave him a sympathetic smile as she brushed past him. She squeezed his shoulder on her way past. “Sorry for your loss, Kyle.”

His hand entangled with hers before he could think about it, grabbing and locking her hand in his as she breezed past.

“Stay,” his voice was gruff even to his own ears. “Please. If it isn’t too much trouble.”

She squeezed his hand and nodded.

He went around the island and peeled back the foil on the plate she left him. It was still hot.

He shuffled to the couch and collapsed on it like the wind had been knocked right out of him.

He turned on an old Master Chef and ate in silence. It wasn’t until a sweaty bottle of root beer was placed in his hand that he noticed Maria hadn’t sat beside him yet.

She was standing off to the side, and it suddenly hit him like a ton of bricks that she was trying to give him space.

Larger than life Maria DeLuca was making herself small for him, and that wouldn’t do.

He knew she meant well, but it made him feel shittier.

“I promise I don’t bite,” he went for a light joke, but it fell flat.

“No, you don’t,” Maria finally sat beside him, and his body relaxed. “You don’t need to make me feel comfortable, Kyle. I just wanted to give you space.”

Her hand entwined with his, and they sat in silence. But then it switched to Master Chef Juniors, and he lost it.

A toothy 10-year-old, eerily reminiscent of his patient, smiled into the camera. To his utter embarrassment, he began sobbing.

“He was only seven,” he sputtered. His voice was choked up and every attempt to rein himself in failed. “He loved wrestling and Spiderman. He wanted to be a fireman when he grew …” he couldn’t finish – cut off by his own sob.

He felt her shift closer, her arms wrapped around him tight enough to stop the onslaught of anxious breathing.

He buried his face into her neck, his embarrassment abandoned in favor of the full-body release of his sadness, anger, and pain.

Maria clicked her tongue, rocked him gently, and brushed her lips across his temple and damp hair.

“I’m s-sorry,” he choked out, aware of how he was dampening her neck and shirt with tears and God knows what else.

“Shhhh,” she hummed soothingly. “Talk it through. It’s OK if I don’t understand the procedure; just talk it through.”

He ran through the entire surgical procedure. Every step leading up to Levi’s surgery and every tool he used.

Maria stopped him on occasion to confirm it was the proper protocol, the proper utensil, and so on. When he was done, she made him repeat it all over again.

They were settled into the couch by then, his head resting on her chest wedged beneath her chin.

She scratched at his scalp, and at some point, his tears subsided, and his breathing matched hers.

“You did everything right, Kyle,” she said after a while. 

“Bless that sweet baby’s soul and his parents. You didn’t make any mistakes. There’s nothing else you could’ve done. He had the best care by the best doctor until he closed his eyes, and he went peacefully. Mourn him, but don’t let it eat away at you.”

He nodded. Knowing the truth and hearing the truth were two different things.

At some point, he felt he should have extricated himself from her embrace, but a selfish, lonely part of him relished the comfort.

As if reading his mind, like the psychic she proclaimed to be, she hugged him tighter.

Her heartbeat lulled him into the soundest sleep he had in months.

When he woke up, he was hugging a pillow that still smelled of her. it was a quarter past two.

He scanned the room bleary-eyed, the throw tossed over him tumbling to the floor with the effort.

The blinking on his cellphone let him know he had a text.

Had to run. Rest up and start again tomorrow. ♡

He shuffled into his room and fell onto his bed. He expected to feel a wave of regret and embarrassment, but it never came.

Instead, he felt unburdened.

vi.

He didn’t sign up for this. Him, Liz, Rosa, Alex, and Maria. None of them did.

But extraterrestrial bullshit invaded their lives, and they made do with it. Whether it was love and feelings or a birthright, the alien fight became their own.

But they weren’t resistant to attacks. They weren’t immune. They were fragile and susceptible.

They weren’t soldiers; they were humans. Assets. Liabilities. Victims.

Rosa was a victim once. It was something he fought to make peace with, and that took a long time. But now she was a victim too.

Flashes of the past two days flickered through his mind like an old film.

Another survivor from the crash was in their midst. What began as a tenuous partnership to help revive Max turned into lines drawn and a declaration of war.

All wars have casualties, and Maria was nearly one.

He couldn’t shake the image of Michael carrying her lifeless body across the desert.

It was the most distraught he had seen him since the prison explosion. Liz and Rosa flanked his sides.

Alex and Max were closing in behind them. There was blood everywhere.

He did what he could to stop the bleeding while Michael sped to the hospital.

He worked on her all the way to the OR, straddled over her form on the gurney willing her to live.

He physically fought his colleagues trying to rip him away.

As a general rule, no one is supposed to work on family and friends, but some rules were meant to be broken.

He couldn’t leave that OR if he wanted to, but he didn’t want to. There was no way in hell he could sit idly by when he could help.

He left the questions to his mother and Max. They could sort out the stories on their end, and he could do everything in his power to make sure his friend came out of it on the other side on his end.

He hadn’t slept in two days. He hadn’t left the hospital. He barely left her room at all.

He couldn’t lose anyone else. He got a second chance with Rosa, but second chances were anomalies, not the norm.

He rubbed his temples, closed his eyes and sighed.

“Y-you,” Maria croaked before clearing her throat with no success. “You look like shit, Valenti.”

She coughed and laughed at the same time before her body alerted her that both were a terrible idea. “Oww!” She groaned.

He was at her bedside in two long strides. His body relaxed for the first time in days as he poured her a cup of water and smiled fondly with utter relief as she drank it greedily.

“Take it easy,” he cooed, as he stroked her hair.

“I’m assuming I have a couple of cracked ribs?” She asked, her voice raspy.

“You would assume correctly.” He looked down on her and smiled. “I want to tell you that you look like shit too, but it would be a lie.”

“Flattery … will get you … everywhere,” she rasped as she tried to get comfortable. “Although …”

He scanned the machines and checked her vitals, and signaled the nurse that she was awake.

“Although, what?”

“Although, I briefly remember you on top of me, and…” she ran her fingers across the bandage on her chest. “You lucky bastard, you already saw me naked,” she joked.

“Ah. But the circumstances weren’t like I imagined. It would require a do-over.” He moved out of the way for the nurse to check out Maria.

After what seemed to be an eternity she left urging him to let Maria rest and get some himself.

“You imagined me?” It was like Maria to pick up where they left off.

He felt his face heat up.

“You scared the crap out of us, Maria,” he plopped on the bed and grabbed her hand.

“Nice swerve, Kyle, but I’ll allow it,” she squeezed his hand back. “Where is everyone?”

Her voice was small, and he wondered if she had an irrational fear that no one else showed up for her.

“I texted them that you were awake,” he replied running his fingers feather-light against the pulse in her wrist.

“Visiting hours are over, but almost everyone has been here,” he fretted over her. He knew he was doing it, but he couldn’t bring himself to stop.

“Almost everyone?” She looked wary. He could tell she already had her suspicions before he could confirm.

“Michael was thrown out two days ago,” he couldn’t hide his annoyance mentioning the most volatile of their pod squad acquaintances.

“He was too … aggressive. Others were complaining. He couldn’t be reined in. He really cares about you, you know?”

“I know,” she shook her head.

“And Rosa wasn’t happy that she couldn’t come,” he flashed back to how volatile his half-sister was. Max’s apartment was probably a wreck.

“Which one of them slugged you?” Maria ran her bandaged hand with the IV across his jawline.

“Rosa has a mean right hook,” he admitted not hiding how impressed he was by that.

“She always did,” Maria agreed. “How’s that going?”

“Still adjusting, I guess.”

“To know you is to love you, Kyle. She’ll come around,” she squeezed her eyes shut tight and exhaled slowly.

“Are you in pain? I can get you some more–”

“I’m fine, Kyle. I don’t need anything. I’m probably going to wish that alien bastard had finished the job when I get the medical bills though,” she blinked back tears and forced herself to smile.

“Maria –”

“Go figure, I got probed and in none of the fun ways. Stabbed in the chest by glowing alien paraphernalia and left to die in a cave is not how I expected to go. I’m guessing Max still can’t tap into his healing powers?”

He wanted to say so much – comfort her better, but he settled for going along with her topic change. “No, Max is still blocked. But Michael tried to heal you,” he met her eyes and shrugged.

“But Michael can’t heal…” her confusion was almost endearing to him.

“Didn’t stop him from trying,” he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. He was still fretting and busying himself. “You had a close one. We thought we lost you twice, and none of us can bear losing anyone.

He was tired, and doctor mode bled into friend mode. He didn’t realize he was pulling back her gown and checking her bandage.

Her surgical wounds would heal nicely, if he said so himself. He secured the bandage tight, poked and prodded until he was satisfied.

At her cough he yanked out his stethoscope and listened, nodding to himself after confirming her breathing was fine.

He flashed a light in her eyes, studied her pupils and ignored her scrutiny.

He knew he looked like hell, bloodshot eyes, and dark circles around them. He hadn’t shaved in days, his dark stubble uncharacteristic. His hair was matted except for the tufts he mussed from constantly running his fingers through his hair.

“When’s the last time you slept, Kyle?” She asked innocently enough.

“I’m fine,” he lied. “Remember? I do this for a living.”

She raised her brow but dropped it. “What’s my prognosis, doc?”

“You look good,” he replied, his voice soft and worn even to his own ears. “You had a concussion, but we kept an eye on it. Your surgical incision looks good. You’ll barely have a scar.”

“Scars mean you lived – they mean you survived,” she replied.

“Yeah,” he rubbed his thumb across her hairline. “Yeah, they do. Vital organs were missed, so that’s –”

“When do I get out of here, Kyle?”

Leave it to Maria to get to the bottom line. It killed him that even then, her concern was financing. They probably didn’t require exceptional healthcare on whatever planet the others derived from.

“If you promise to take off and settle in at home, preferably somewhere with room and a simple floor plan, then I’ll get you out.”

Max’s spacious home came to mind, but there was also the cabin or even his apartment.

“But you need to rest, Maria.”

“Pot meet kettle, Kyle. Pot meet kettle.” She shuffled in the bed and winced and gasped in pain.

His jaw clenched as he bit back a sharp reprimand. She patted a spot on the bed beside her and raised her brow.

“Maria,” he started, too tired to argue with her but gearing up for one anyway.

“Don’t,” she glared at him. “Just for a little bit, please.”

She didn’t want to be alone. He understood that.

“Just for a little while,” he ignored her triumphant smirk. She acted as if she didn’t have a knack for making people bend to her will.

He slid beside her. The hospital bed was more comfortable than he cared to admit. He checked her vitals again, slid his arm beneath her, and gingerly pulled her into his chest.

It was a small enough bed where snuggling was the only option. She didn’t seem to mind. She burrowed herself into him.

He tucked the covers around her and double-checked to make sure her water pitcher was full. When she thought she hid a grimace, he upped her morphine drip.

He felt her soft laugh reverberate through him and how she shook her head infinitesimally.

“What?” He yawned. “Do I even want to know?”

“Always fretting,” she patted his hand gently. “You’re always taking care of everyone, but who takes care of you?”

He wanted to laugh. Instead, he rested his head on hers. He allowed her warmth and the sound of the heart monitor to lull him into a sleepy daze.

His eyelids were heavy, his voice husky with exhaustion as his lips barely grazed the shell of her ear.

“You, Maria.” He could tell he caught her by surprise. Her breath hitched, and admittedly, it made him smile.

 "It’s always you,“ he whispered as he finally drifted off to sleep.

—-

[samuelmmarcus]

Beautiful Homes of Instagram: Fall Decor

  Beautiful Homes of Instagram is one of my favorite series here on HomeBunch and it feels even more special when these homes are decorated for a special time of the year, such as Fall.

Ashley from @modernglamhome, beautifully decorated many spaces of her gorgeous home and she’s sharing all of the details with us today. Keep reading to learn a few decorating tricks by this talented homeowner:

   “Hi! I am Ashley, the voice behind Modern Glam a lifestyle blog where I share my love of home decor, fun DIY projects and healthy recipes. My husband and I have been renovating our California bungalow since we moved in 9 years ago. My husband, Nick is a general contractor and I own a women’s clothing store, Flaunt Boutique. We live in the San Francisco bay area with our 2 young kids.

When Luciane asked me to contribute to her inspiring series, Beautiful Home of Instagram, my jaw hit the floor. I’m just your average suburban mom who also loves to create a beautiful home. I love the home decor community on Instagram and I get so much inspiration and many of my design ideas from there.

So, let me show you around my cozy California bungalow home that we purchased 9 years ago. When we first bought our home, it was a blank slate. The previous owner didn’t do any improvements so the house needed some serious TLC, which is perfect for me!”

  Beautiful Homes of Instagram: Fall Decor

There are lots of things that we love about our home, but one of the first things that drew me to this one when we were looking was the front porch.

Fall Decor

Fall decor makes this front porch feel even more magical! I am loving the string lights and the faux candles. What a nice touch!

Outdoor Sconce: Rejuvenation.

Beautiful Lantern Pendants: here, here & here.

Hello, Pumpkin!

I like to use as many natural elements in my fall porch decor as possible. Lots of pumpkins, cornstalks, hay bales and mums were all that I needed to create this fun and festive neutral fall front porch!

Doormats: Wreath Doormat & Black and White Runner.

Siding Paint Color

The exterior paint color is “Benjamin Moore Revere Pewter”.

Hang Chairs

Our hanging chairs are one of our favorite spots to sit and watch the kids play and visit with our neighbors.

Fall Pillows: here, here, here & here.

Round Outdoor Rug: Target – similar here, here & here.

Hanging Chairs: Serena & Lily.

Summer Vibes

This is how Ashley decorates this space for summer: “I added a small table out here for setting drinks on and used an affordable circle rug to ground the space. New pillows and cute beach towels bring this space to life.”

Pillows: Serena & Lily.

Knit Pillows: Target.

Beach Towels: Serena & Lily.

Front Door

Our front door is by Pella and is painted Clark and Kensington’s Mountainside Vista. Although, I admit, I love to change the color of my front door. This is the 3rd color it’s been in 3 years and I’m already contemplating another change!

Meet the Homeowner!

This is the beautiful and talented, Ashley from @modernglamhome. I am sure you guys will love her home as much I do!

Living Room

My personal design rule is to buy all my furniture in neutral shades. Having a neutral foundation makes it’s easy to switch out the accessories for each season.

Pair of Stools: Serena & Lily.

Rattan Chair: Serena & Lily.

  Fireplace

Fireplace tile is Calcutta gold fish scale tile.

Tile: here & here – similar.

Mirror: Anthropologie.

Sweet Dreams

I am loving seeing Ashley’s puppies around the house… They’re adorable!

Side table is from Serena & Lily.

Hats

A quick and easy update I made for summer was creating this hat wall. I pulled all the sunhats out of my closet and hung them on the wall!

Beautiful Blankets: here, here, here, here, here, here & here.

Draperies: here – similar.

Hardware: here – similar.

Paint Color

All of our walls are painted Benjamin Moore’s Cotton Balls. I love the soft white color that has a touch of cream in it. We also painted our ceilings and trim the same color but in different sheens. This makes the room seem larger when all the colors are the same.

My walls are a satin finish, where the trim is semi gloss and the ceiling is flat. This creates a cohesive look that expands the room and makes it seem bigger!

Sofa Sectional: Pottery Barn Big Sur Sectional.

Coffee Table: Serena & Lily.

Chairs: Serena & Lily.

Rug: Serena & Lily.

Inspired by this Room:

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Dining Room

 My style is pretty eclectic. I love to mix different styles and use new, modern and antique pieces in the same space. My dining room is a perfect example of that. We have a rustic farmhouse table made of reclaimed oak with an ornate trestle base. I paired this traditional piece with modern lucite chairs. I love the mix of old and new!

Dining Table: here, here, here & here – similar.

Lighting

Chandelier: Visual Comfort Darlana Linear Chandelier – similar here.

Fall-Inspired

To stick with the modern farmhouse fall table theme, I added some casual yet neutral plaid napkins and a white pumpkin to each place setting.

Dining Chairs: here – similar.

Fall Tablescape

Fall Tablescape: “A mix of bay leaves, olive branches and rosemary stems were all I needed to create this fall centerpiece. Add in a few neutral white pumpkins, some candles and it’s the easiest centerpiece to create!”

Plates: Target.

Mugs: here & here – similar.

Kitchen

One of the first rooms we tackled when we first moved in was our kitchen. We originally painted the cabinets and installed new Calcutta Gold marble countertops. This spring, we underwent another remodel and replaced all the cabinetry, added open shelving and integrated appliances. The new design is more efficient and I love the warmth that the open shelves bring to this space!

Counterstools: McGee & Co. – Others: here, here, here, here & here.

Lighting: Visual Comfort.

Cabinet Paint Color

Our kitchen cabinets are maple with Benjamin Moore’s Simply White paint.

Kitchen Faucet: Delta.

Sink: Kohler.

Backsplash

Backsplash is a 3×6 white subway tile.

Open Shelves

The open shelving in our recently remodeled kitchen are from Ultra Shelf and you can order any size shelf to fit your space.

Hardware: Schoolhouse Edgecliff Pulls.

Metal Basket: McGee & Co.

Mixer: KitchenAid.

White Oak & Subway Tiles

I love the white oak and the warmth that it adds to our kitchen.

Countertop: Calcutta Gold Marble countertop.

Sconces: Visual Comfort – – similar here, here & here.

Wooden Bread Boards: here & here.

Breakfast Room

The breakfast room features a custom banquette and a marble tulip dining table from Design within Reach.

Similar Dining Table: here & here.

Stay Awhile Sign: Etsy.

Dining Chairs

Lucite Chairs: All Modern.

Hardwood Flooring

Another big project that we completed this year was to replace all the hardwood flooring. It’s amazing what a difference it makes in the overall feel and brightness inside your home.

New hardwood floor is California Classics in their Mediterranean Collection – color is called Vittoria – similar here & here.

Master Bedroom

Pink is my favorite color and our bedroom and closet are a true reflection of this love. My husband even loves this color. Pink in the bedroom is very romantic and has a glow at night that is ethereal.

Platform Bed: Pottery Barn.

Pillows

Pillows are from Serena & Lily.

Blush Pink Throw Pillow: Target.

Paint Color

Our bedroom is one of the only rooms that is painted a color other than white. I chose Benjamin Moore’s Gentle Butterfly.

Artwork: Minted.

Decor

Headboard: West Elm.

Acrylic Console Tables: CB2 – similar here.

Mongolian Lamb Stool: West Elm.

Sconces: Savoy House.

Artwork: Minted.

Bedding

Bedding is from Serena & Lily (my favorite bedding!): Duvet Cover & Sheet Set.

Throw: Anthropologie (Discontinued).

African Juju Hat: here – similar.

Basket: World Market – Other Beautiful Baskets: here & here.

Dressing Room

Another favorite room in our home is our walk-in closet. It’s honestly what sold me on our house. We updated the space 5 years ago with built in cabinets, leopard carpeting and beautiful finishes. It’s a true reflection of my personal style.

Our leopard carpet is from a local carpet store.

Hardware: LuxHoldups.

Lighting

I painted the ceiling and walls Calamine by Farrow and Ball. It was the perfect jumping off point for the rest of the room.

Lighting: Arteriors Osgood Pendant.

Master Bathroom

Our master bathroom is done in classic carrera marble. This room took almost a year to complete! That’s the life of living with a contractor for your husband.

The baskets under the sink hide everyday items such a hairbrushes, my hairdryer and curling iron, and extra towels. All of my makeup and toiletries are stored in the nearby linen closet. Because we only have 2 sets of towels and sheets, there is ample room for all the normal bathroom toiletries and beauty products!

Bathroom apothecary console is from Pottery Barn.

Bathroom Faucets: Pottery Barn.

Mirrors: Pottery Barn.

Sconces: Pottery Barn.

Shower Tiles: Carrara Marble.

Spa-like

One of my favorite parts of our bathroom is the large soaking tub. It is the prettiest focal point and serves as a true sanctuary after a long day.

Lighting: Visual Comfort – one of my favorite chandeliers!

Faux Fiddle Lead Tree: World Market – similar here.

Tub: Kingston Brass.

Rug: Kismet Rug – similar here.

Backyard

Since we live in the bay area, California, where the housing prices are insane and lot sizes are minuscule, creating an outdoor living area as an extension of our indoors allows us to expand our living space. And with California weather, we can use these areas 9 months out of the year.

Pillows: Serena & Lily.

Ottoman Coffee Table: Serena & Lily.

Chairs

Rattan Egg Chair: Target’s Opalhouse.

Accent Chairs: Target’s Opalhouse Brittana – also in Loveseat.

Beautiful Outdoor Umbrellas: here & here.

Outdoor Sofa

A long sofa meant for the outdoors is soft and neutral. This allows me to change the colors year to year. I offset the sofa with two oversized chairs and added a small outdoor coffee table in the middle. This allows us to set food or drinks on it.

The sofa we have had for a few years now. It was a great find from the Restoration Hardware outlet. I love that the cushions are a soft gray that make them completely versatile to new color schemes!

Beautiful Outdoor Sofas: here, here, here & here.

Rug: Target.

Gather

Our backyard isn’t big, but we love to spend time out here and gather with friends and family.

Merlot & S’mores

We also recently updated our side yard and have a great space for making s’mores and enjoying a glass of wine or two.

Chairs: Serena & Lily.

Pillows: Serena & Lily.

    Many thanks to Ashley for sharing the details above. Please, make sure to follow her on Instagram to see more!

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Black & White Modern Farmhouse.

Interior Design Ideas: Home Renovation.

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2019 New Year Home Tour.

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Florida Beach Cottage.

Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen’s Home – Full House Tour.

Dark Cedar Shaker Exterior.

Beautiful Homes of Instagram: Coastal Farmhouse Design.

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“Dear God,

If I am wrong, right me. If I am lost, guide me. If I start to give-up, keep me going.

Lead me in Light and Love”.

Have a wonderful day, my friends and we’ll talk again tomorrow.”

with Love,

Luciane from HomeBunch.com

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[takadasaiko]

Demons at the Door: Chapter Fourteen

FFN II AO3

Summary: Tom, Liz, and Howard visit Ocean City to try to recover some of Tom's missing childhood memories and the Board makes their decision.                              Actions

Chapter Fourteen: Echoes from the Past

They had a twenty-four hour reprieve before the Board made their decision and Tom and Howard had elected to use that time digging into Tom's disappearance as a child. The decision to go out to Ocean City had surprised Liz, but she had made sure to wrap up the pile of paperwork involved in their deal with Halcyon before she'd left the Post Office that night so that she could get up at the break of dawn and drive out to the Maryland beach the next morning.

Clouds had been building as she drove, but they looked ready to break open by the time she pulled up to the address Tom had texted her with. She stepped out of the the car, gaze sweeping the little street. Many of the houses looked lived in, but considering these were the busier beach months it was hard to say if that was normal. An elderly woman with a dog was out on her front lawn and gave a friendly wave that Liz returned slowly.

The front porch was screened in and she found that door unlocked, but she paused when she reached the front door, unsure if she should knock or walk in. She hesitated there a moment before she heard something behind her and turned, seeing a car pull up along the curb at the street, parking behind her own. Tom unfolded out of the driver's seat and Howard out of the passenger, and Liz pushed back out through the screen door to meet them on the sidewalk. "I see Tom got to make the call on the rent car," she teased, motioning to the Mustang they had driven up in.

Her husband tried for a smile, but as she moved closer she saw all the signs that he hadn't slept at all the night before. He looked tired and stressed, physically and emotionally, and she reached out so that her fingertips brushed his. He took her hand immediately and gave it a squeeze. "Thanks for coming. Always the bad timing, right?"

She tightened her grip. "Don't worry about that. You guys are on a time crunch. What do we have?"

"We spent the better part of last night pouring over police reports and articles and information that my own investigations turned up," Howard explained. "Nothing has jogged any memories of that night."

"Trauma, especially in children, has a way of burying itself deep," Liz murmured. "This is the house? Do you think it'll spark something?"

"We're going to see," Tom answered.

"I know you guys have probably gone over it in detail, but walk me through what you know from that night, Howard."

They made their way up to the house and Liz's father-in-law pulled a key from his pocket as he spoke. "We spent every summer out here. Longer once Chris - Tom," he corrected, "- was born. It was our time away as a family. We'd been out a couple of weeks by that point and I don't remember exactly what set it off, but Scottie and I ended up in a shouting match late that night."

Liz risked a glance at Tom as they stepped into the old house and Howard reached to switch the lights on. Tom stood frozen, looking over his surroundings carefully, but she couldn't tell if he recognised anything or not.

"We'd both probably had too much to drink and I stormed out. Ended up spending the night at a motel down by the pier. I came back late the next morning and the whole house was crawling with police and Scottie…" He swallowed hard, his gaze distant as if the memories were vivid enough to see play out in front of him. "She said our boy had been taken in the night. No forced entry, no real sign of struggle. He was just gone. She blamed herself, and at the time I thought she was a grieving mother taking on more than she was responsible for."

"And now?" Tom asked.

"Now I believe it was a long game. If she was ordered or if it was her choice, I don't know yet, but I think that she set this all into motion. She took you, set herself up as a victim to be protected - especially after the car wreck - and pushed everything that's happened into motion. She's a strategist. A talented one. To try to deny that would set us up for failure from the start."

"But to predict all of this?" Liz asked, disbelief colouring her voice.

"It's the ripple effect," Tom answered with a shrug. "You go into the scenario with a catalyst to set of a chain reaction of events. You may not know the exact ramifications, but if you know the mark well enough, if you're good enough, it's possible."

"You sound like you've used it before," Liz murmured and her husband shrugged.

"I have. Plenty of times, but never on this scale. It's… if she did, she really is the best I've ever seen."

"Take a look around, son," Howard prompted. "If you can remember that night - anything about that night - it can help us piece things together."

"How close is it to the original setup?" Liz asked.

"Exactly. All the furniture is in the same place, all the same. Nothing's been moved."

"How is that possible? Did they stop renting it out?"

"I bought it after the police finished their investigation. David that rented it to us each summer was never going to get it back out there after the publicity and I wanted to conduct my own investigation, so I bought the home. It's ironic. Scottie had been trying to talk me into making an offer on it for years."

Tom started forward, his expression unreadable as he looked over the living room in detail. Liz started to follow, but Howard caught her by the arm, holding lightly. "Give him a few minutes."

She froze where he was. If it was her, if she was wandering through the house where the fire had happened and trying to recall that horrific night, she wasn't sure she would want to do it alone. Tom was focused though, and she wasn't sure that he'd notice if she was there or not.

Liz stood back, watching and waiting. If he needed her, she'd only be steps away.

There was something familiar, yet not about the house. It reminded him of his nightmares with the memories just out of his grasp. He reached for them, trying to grab on, but they slipped away.

Tom moved through the house room by room, trying to hold onto the possibility of a memory. He was vaguely aware that Liz and Howard were following at a distance, hoping for something he wasn't sure he could give.

He wound back through the hall past master bedroom, an office, and the kitchen with its door that led out towards the beach. There was one room in the back and he pushed at the door that was halfway closed.

It was a child's room. His room, he thought, and he paused at the door. It was exactly how the script that Lucy Game had been given described, not one thing out of place. The bed was pushed up against the far wall, the blue comforter showing signs of age after nearly thirty years, a couple of stuffed animals still piled on it. The bed ran parallel to the wall with double windows that, if the curtains were pulled back, would show the ocean not too far away. A rug covered part of the wood floor, starting under the bed and stretching toward the opposite wall where shelves held toys that a four-year-old little boy would have treasured.

Toy cars, dinosaurs, and a single red tug boat that caught his attention were on the lowest shelf, which would have been the easiest for him to reach at that age. He reached out, picking up the boat and turning it over in his hands, a ghost of a memory taunting him.

"Do you remember where you got that?"

Tom turned, finding Howard at the door. "It's familiar," he murmured, studying it and trying to will the memory into place. He closed his eyes, focusing on it, and he could almost see a pair of hands that held it, handing it to him and the excitement over, but he couldn't recall the face.

He loosed a frustrated breath and moved to take a seat on the bed. Soft footsteps followed him and Liz sat with him. She didn't say anything, but her presence helped. She looped her arm through his and leaned in.

"Your nightmare," she said after a long stretch of silence. "You told me that it's usually the same man trying to push you under the water. Do you ever see part of the house or anything that might be familiar?"

"It's just the beach," Tom answered reluctantly, but then sat up a little straighter. "There was a door."

"What?"

He didn't wait to explain, but stood and Howard barely shifted out of his way as he rushed out of the room. Liz was right. The nightmare was the closest thing to a memory that he had. If he could prove it true or untrue maybe it'd break the memories open like a crack in glass.

Tom barely stopped long enough to unlock the back door that led out to the beach. The sky has darkened considerably since they'd been inside and he felt rain splash down against his skin as he picked up his pace, something that he couldn't pinpoint driving him forward. It was an adrenaline rush, like the feeling of fight or flight had been kicked into overdrive. His breath was coming to him in short gasps by the time stopped on the beach, the water lapping over his boots and soaking his jeans around his ankles. He was shaking, flashes of memories mixing in with what he saw as he stood there.

He'd been asleep.

There'd been someone that came into his room. He couldn't remember the face, but he remembered not being afraid of him. The man had scooped him up, and the next thing Tom thought he remembered was taking off across the sand and being run down at the waves, his face shoved under the water and held there. He had no idea how long he'd struggled or what more there was to it, but he'd tried to get away and the man had nearly drowned him to stop him.

"Tom?"

He stiffened at the sound of his name and turned. His expression must have been something close to terrified because Liz was reaching out very slowly and very carefully, making sure not to touch him before he saw what she was doing. "Honey, are you okay?"

He wasn't sure when the scattered rain drops had turned into something more, but they were both drenched as they stood on the beach and he shook his head. "No," he answered, the word riding out on a breath.

Liz stepped forward, wrapping her arms around him and he folded in. "I tried to get away and he nearly drowned me," he whispered after a long moment.

"Who, babe?"

"I don't know."

He heard her make a soft sound. "Remind me never to tease you again about not being able to swim, okay?"

That pulled the barest of laughs from him and he made a small sound of agreement.

"Tom?"

"Yeah?"

"We should get back inside."

He nodded, not trusting his voice, and Liz shifted so that one arm was still around his back as they walked towards the house in the pouring rain.

Howard liked puzzles. He enjoyed solving them. All those little pieces that looked so disconnected coming together as a whole gave him a sense of satisfaction. The more challenging the puzzle, the more he enjoyed it once he reached the end.

The puzzle of what had happened to his son that terrible night that he had disappeared had been one that he'd worked worked over in his mind for years now, but there had been key pieces missing.

One of those pieces had been Tom. He had needed him to remember who took him. He had hoped he could remember. That could have led to Scottie's handlers. Howard was certain that there were others somewhere within his organisation and until he found them, none of them would be safe and Scottie's people would win.

It had seemed so important that he remembered until Howard had seen his son - grown now, and no longer that helpless little boy - standing in the rain, memories that had been deeply buried slamming into him with a force that looked like it could have knocked him over. Howard had known this could be painful. He knew it likely would be. He had expected that and accepted that. This, somehow, seemed to be where he was finding his line.

Maybe it was the house. Maybe it was everything they were up against. Or maybe it was that terrified look in Tom's eyes that didn't fade once Liz had gotten him in. Howard couldn't be sure. All he knew was that they were running out of time and if they arrested him, he wasn't sure how he was going to help Tom get through this alive.

They'd taken him from his father once. He wasn't going to let go again. Not if he could help it.

Howard looked up at the sound of the old wooden floors creaking under feet and Elizabeth Keen rounded the corner, still towelling her hair off from the shower that she and Tom had hopped into after getting caught in the pouring rain. Apparently his daughter-in-law was as well acquainted with a go bag with extra clothes as his son was. "How is he?" Howard ventured.

Liz sighed, taking a heavy seat in a chair across from him. "Confused, upset, frustrated. Not remembering is bad enough, but remembering the worst of it is even worse."

"Hm," Howard hummed softly, his gaze turning back to the rain. "May I ask you something, Liz?"

She quirked an eyebrow at him. "I won't promise you'll like the answer, but sure."

"Did I do him more harm than good by coming back into his life?"

Liz was quiet for long enough that Howard glanced her direction. He found her expression thoughtful. "Tom's stubborn. He knew about you before you came to him. He just… got this idea stuck in his mind that he couldn't look for answers without it somehow replacing Agnes and me. I'm not even sure where he got that one, but he held onto it pretty tight. Honestly, I think part of it was that he was scared the truth was worse than what he'd sort of just come to accept about you guys."

"What was that?"

"That you didn't care. That you abandoned him." She leaned back in the chair a little. "After Agnes was born and things settled down, he was a little more curious about you specifically. I mean, between Frank Phelps and McCready, he knew he didn't have anyone to base being a good dad off of."

"He seems to be doing a fair job without any role model needed," Howard murmured fondly, thinking of the way Tom had been with Agnes at the birthday party.

"He's great, but questions still come up. When your plane went down he started fixating on it. Absolutely obsessing. Then you popped up and…." She closed her eyes. "I told you the other day to walk away if you aren't willing to put him first, but you helped him. I think the way you came back was wrong, but not that you did."

Howard nodded after a long moment. He'd spent the last several years pushing back decades of emotion and focusing on the task at hand. There was a lot of pain involved in what Scottie had done, but dwelling on that only made him sloppy, and that was something they simply couldn't afford. He had felt the need to become more calculated and more ruthless than he'd been before to survive, and maybe - if he took a moment to be honest with himself - he'd treated his son in a similar way. He'd treated him as the operative that he was without, holding back on the affection he did feel. After this was over. That's what he'd told himself. Maybe waiting had done more damage than he'd ever thought.

"He used to wait outside my office door when we came here," he said after a long moment, the memory of his son looking up with those big blue eyes from where he had been playing with one toy or another and waiting as patiently as a toddler could coming to mind so vividly it could have been yesterday. "I thought I'd have time."

"You do," Liz told him, her voice pointed. "Now. Don't screw it up."

She was smirking just a little and Howard managed a thin smile in return, turning when a floorboard gave a loud creak. Tom stood there, looking slightly less overwhelmed than he had when Liz had guided him back inside, and he looked between them. "Don't let me interrupt."

"Your dad was just telling me a story about how adorable you were as a kid," Liz said, a little mischief in her smile and she managed to draw a hesitant smile from him.

"Not a total terror?"

"You were very well behaved," Howard answered.

Tom snorted a laugh. "Yeah. Frank and Eva would argue on that one. I never heard the end of how much trouble I was to them from the first day in." He took a seat in a chair next to Liz and his gaze shifted to the rain outside. "If everything goes the way we're hoping and the Board gives me a chance at this, I'm going to talk to Agent Lamb about having Scottie transfer to Halcyon custody."

"That's risky," Howard said, watching his son carefully.

"We need all sides if this if we're going to get to the bottom of it, and she won't talk there. It's like she's afraid of someone listening in. I know you don't think-"

"I don't, but this is your investigation. If you think you can get the truth from her, do what you need to."

Tom stared at him for a moment and he nodded slowly.

Howard's phone began to buzz in his pocket and he reached in, recognizing the number. "Albert. Has the Board reached a verdict?"

"We're close. You'll need to wrap whatever you're doing and come in."

"We're on our way." He hung up and looked to Tom. "Are you ready for this?"

"As ready as I can be."

They checked for weapons at the door, asking both Tom and Howard to empty their pockets as well. Apparently Howard's stunt weeks before when they had infiltrated the building had stuck with the Board members and the new situation had them on high alert.

They were escorted in to where the table was already full, Maggie Ellis at the head. "Howard, Tom, have a seat."

Tom shot his father a quick look, but Howard's focus was on the Board. The only armed personnel that had been outside were Halcyon employee. No cops, no feds. That seemed like a promising sign of nothing else.

"We've been over the evidence that Mr Keen left with us and have done our own DNA test," Albert McKinney said. "The results matched, which means that with both Howard and Scottie… unable to continue in a leadership position, the majority shares are legally passed down to you once the death certificate is reversed."

"Good," Howard answered, finally glancing towards Tom. "Then it's settled."

"There's some alarming information about you in here, Howard," McKinney continued. "Your methods have been…. unorthodox at times, but if this information is true, it looks like the key to putting Scottie behind bars was entirely fabricated by you."

"Not entirely," Howard argued. "Scottie is a deep cover agent and she did kidnap and hold Dr Whitehall without his consent. I'm also fully convinced that she was the one that sabotaged my jet. Two pilots were killed in that crash."

"We are well aware, Howard, but until the full evidence has been presented at the end of Mr Keen's investigation, the Board has decided to place you under house arrest."

Howard snorted. "Under what legal authority?"

"The Board has decided to try to keep this in house until we have all the facts," Ellis chimed in, "but if you refuse to comply with their demands, they will be forced to take the evidence your son presented to the authorities."

Tom looked over to see Howard's calculating expression. "Hey," he said quietly. "Let me get to the bottom of this."

Howard met his gaze and the younger man saw the struggle there. Finally he nodded. "Be careful."

"You too."

"I have a meeting set with our legal team to start the process of reversing your death certificate," Ellis told him. "We'll have Howard escorted home. Once everything has cleared the courts and you sign the paperwork you'll have full control of the case, access to all parties involved, with just one stipulation."

There it was. There was always a but. "What's that?"

"The Board wants to be kept apprised of any movements," McKinney answered. "The investigation needs to be completely transparent. Do you think you can handle that, Mr Keen?"

"But I'll have full access? My team too."

"As long as we're confident you're looking for the truth, yes."

"Seems fair enough."

"Then let's reverse a death certificate," Maggie Ellis said with a small smile and motioned towards the door.

Tom took one last look back of the Board and his father. He was all in now.

Notes: One of the things I was sad about was that we didn't get really dive into why Tom was taken as a kid. I hope we still will in S5, but until then, I'm really pleased to be able to poke at it in this story. I just wrapped up writing chapter sixteen today and it's super heavy on Scottie's backstory for this particular fic. I'm a little bouncy over it. I had some high hopes for her redemption arc here and I'm really enjoying the ride so far :D

Next time - Christopher Hargrave comes back from the dead, someone is watching Scottie's every move, and Tom faces off against a new type of danger.

[vincentbnaughton]

Making A Light & Airy Living Room (That’s Still Livable!)

Just when you thought the duplex was getting all the action, we snuck in some beach house updates. The backyard is slowly starting to come together (shed! patio! fence! I CAN’T WAIT to show it to you once it gets a little further along!!) but today we’re diving into our lightener & brighter (and much beachier) living room.

Now this place actually looks like it’s a few blocks from the beach! And the bonus is that everything is sand and popsicle friendly – which is a must for us (we pack this place with family and friends and all the kids). So our goal was never to make it too precious. In other words, we were going for a light and airy look… but it had to be durable, wipeable, and as close to worry-free as we could get it!

sofa | side table | coffee table | rug | bookcase | lamps | wall: SW White Heron | trim: SW Stone Isle

We wanted to use some of the furniture we designed, including one of our new sofas (performance fabric = all the yesses). So we started with our Mellow sofa. It’s sold out right now, but our other two sofas – the Pivot and the Spiffy – are discounted just for the next few days thanks to a Joss & Main’s flash sale (they’ve got different names on J&M for some reason). A lot of things are at the lowest prices they’ve ever been ($699 for the sofas!) so if you’ve had your eye on one of our designs, it’s a pretty great time to check it out.

sofa | side table | coffee table | rug | lamp | chandelier| wall: SW White Heron | trim: SW Stone Isle

Sadly, our trusty old Ikea sectional (Karl the Karlstad, remember?) was ready for retirement (aka: donation). The problem with moving a sectional from house to house to house (we moved it from our second house, to our current house, and then to the beach house over the last eight years) is that sometimes the space would be better suited for a sofa… but you have a sectional… so you just sort of keep moving it around and trying to make the best of it.

We could kind of make sense of it it photos, but in real life there were awkward things like the chaise cutting into the doorway. We tried putting the chaise on the other end of the living room (it’s reversible), but it wasn’t any better because it meant we couldn’t have the extra seating over there, which really comes in handy and gets used a lot.

So as we mentioned a few weeks ago on the podcast, after eight awesome years with Karl, we donated him to a local charity that we love, and he’s living it up with a sweet new family. His legacy lives on. (*cue that Celine Dion song from Titanic*).

Another way that we tried to make this room feel lighter and airier was the patterned gray rug that we bought to replace the vintage one below (which happily lives in a bedroom at the duplex now). OMG that was meant to be in there, guys.

Along with our rug switch, the new sofa is a HUGE step forward in lightening things up. Plus its smaller footprint meant there was room for a few more functional furnishings. Like, momma finally gets a side table on her end of the couch. Hello reading lamp! Hello spot for my tea!

sofa | side table | coffee table | rug | lamp | baskets | bookcase | chandelier

Also, a word about white wood furniture: it’s a GREAT WAY to achieve a lighter look that’s still livable (it’s all wipeable, but it looks so nice and bright). So if you’re staring at a space you’d love to lighten up, sometimes it’s as simple as a $15 quart of white paint with primer built in (we recently tried Behr Marquee and it had great coverage) and you can redo your coffee table and your end tables – or even a bookcase or a shelving unit in an afternoon. Light walls and white (gloriously washable) curtains help too!

The three tiers on our side table = all the spots for magazines, a basket full of legos, or whatever else you like to keep at arm’s length. We actually ordered two more of the same side tables for the duplex because we love it so much. It also comes in a smaller version (which is super marked down right now) and you know I want to make a coffee table version, so stay tuned!

side table | top art | bottom art | vase | lamp | baskets | pink pillow | blue pillow

I also hung some new art that I bought through an artist I found on Instagram. Her name is Sarah Madeira Day and her stuff is just beautiful and so well priced. These two 8 x 8″ canvas prints were $25 each! Printed on canvas with gorgeous vibrant colors! I just love them – and I framed them in simple Ribba frames from Ikea that I already had (with linen-like fabric behind them, which adds some really pretty texture and a double-mat effect).

And as much as we liked the coffee table we DIYed last summer, the dark wood legs started to feel pretty busy – especially as the room got lighter. So we carried over one of these coffee tables that we ordered for the duplex. I’m liking how visually airy it is and the size is better for the space, so I may end up ordering another one to make up for the one I yoinked from the duplex.

Also, John and I burst out laughing when we realized that we basically recreated this photoshoot set-up in our beach house. Even the rugs are similar!

It kind of makes sense that it would happen that way, because we chose some of our favorite stuff for that photo… so I love seeing it living together at the beach house now. Especially mixed with other stuff that we love (that CB2 ladder shelf is so glossy and gorgeous in person, and I feel a deep and meaningful connection to our pretty pink lamp from Target).

Funny story about this coffee table. A couple weeks after that photoshoot, John shot up in bed nervous that the scallops around the outside were a terrible idea. His concern was that it was going to prevent people from kicking their feet up on it (to which I said: “but not everyone puts their feet on the coffee table, right?”).

So imagine his palpable relief when he realized that his legs easily fit between the shallow rounded scallops, and he actually proclaimed it to be more comfortable than our coffee table at home (which also has a small lip on top, but it’s sharper and not rounded/smoothed out).

We’re also happy to report that the edge doesn’t get in the way of other tabletop activities like board games (you know we LOVE OUR BOARD GAMES). Actually the border does a nice job of corralling things. You know, if one of your crazy bear creations gets out of hand or you’re rolling dice and don’t want them flying all over the place. So if you DMed me about that, here’s your answer: works great for family board games – the scallops aren’t nearly tall enough to block your arms or anything like that.

I also had someone message me to say “be sure to put a shallow little remote drawer in your next coffee table design!” and the good news is that this one already has one! I love a little hidden drawer to keep that stuff contained.

Also a note on living room layouts, because I FEEL YOU OUT THERE. THEY ARE HARD. This room has been evolving for over a year and a half now (I know, it feels like just yesterday that we furnished the beach house!), and we still have plans to mount the TV on the wall, possibly paint the walls, and change out those diamond backed chairs that are living by the windows, but more on that in a second.

sofa | side table | coffee table | rug | lamps | media cabinet

One of the reasons that living room layouts are tough is because we make assumptions about the way we live or the things we want and then we’re too nervous to try something else. So it’s hard to unlock a fresh solution if we’re stuck in the same thought patterns. Like for example, it sounds counterintuitive to say getting a smaller sofa can create more seating, but we learned last summer that trying to cram all of our guests onto a sectional wasn’t always the most comfortable or the most conducive to conversation.

So we decided to try to “break up” the seating options a little more. With the chaise gone, we could also tuck a chair into the corner by the TV. So the sofa seats about three adults (the four of us fit on it just fine since the kids are smaller), and there are three other chairs in the room now, too. So even though your brain wants to believe that a sectional = the most seating, it’s not always true.

We’re still on the hunt to find some bigger / more relaxed feeling chairs for the window wall, but these thrifted ones (which you may remember from wayyyyy back in our old home office) are doing the trick for now. I spray painted them and recovered the seats to make them a little more neutral – and I always picture them ending up at the duplex because they have that diamond shape like the diamond windows over there.

Oh and the rug. Let’s talk about that for a second. We recently had a slime incident. Not just a “slime got on the rug” issue, but a “slime sat on the rug for months under the chaise and I only discovered it when we switched the sofa out and it left a huge grease stain that everyone could see thanks to no longer having a chaise” issue. ARGH!

But…. I got it out! After a lot of googling and some tips from people on InstaStories, the winning removal method was pouring white vinegar on the grease spot, letting it sit, scraping it with a spoon (to remove some leftover slime – it was actually “Thinking Putty”) and after it dried I dabbed it with nail polish remover. That was key in lifting the grease stain and you can’t even see where it was! Plus it gives me a new appreciation that this rug has such a variety of gray tones! Those lighter and darker areas make it much more forgiving.

Between that AND getting an immediate chocolate stain on the new sofa (which came right out dabbing it with water – thanks again, performance fabric!) – we feel like this room can take anything that these kids throw at it – both literally and figuratively. I mean… they might prove us wrong, but they’re gonna have to try harder than slime and chocolate…

The last thing I’ll mention while we’re on the topic of updates at the beach house is our dining room chandeliers. A few months ago in our email newsletter, we showed how we swapped out the old capiz chandeliers for these from our lighting line, but I’m not sure we ever shared a picture on the blog. We love that they’re a little more substantial and the polished nickel details tie into the other light fixtures throughout the living room and the kitchen.

capiz chandeliers | benches | chairs | marble vase

The previous chandeliers are now hanging in the master bedrooms at the duplex because it’s basically in the Sherry Petersik Decorating Handbook that every house we fix up must have a capiz fixture somewhere. And you know I love playing musical furniture & light fixtures! (p.s. this is a TV concept, I just don’t want to actually be on tv – but someone please make a series about switching things you already have around like that old show on HGTV called Freestyle and I’d be SO INTO IT! It goes back to my love of staging houses and being scrappy with things you already have on hand).

So there are our latest beach house updates – and I hope it’s comforting to hear that sometimes rooms take a little while to figure out, and it’s totally not a failure to move things around and keep experimenting and trying new things. Even in our very first home I used to rearrange stuff all the time! There truly is no better way to get a quick makeover.

If you want to catch some of our furniture while it’s on flash sale, it’s only on Joss & Main this week (actually, like only 3 more days). And if you want to learn more about the whole furniture designing process, here’s a post we wrote all about that. And for more on our (well, mostly John’s) idea of painting the living room walls a new color, that’s on this week’s podcast. We tried out some trendy online paint companies to see if they really would make picking paint colors easier…

*This post contains affiliate links*

The post Making A Light & Airy Living Room (That’s Still Livable!) appeared first on Young House Love.

[dawnjeman]

Beautiful Homes of Instagram: New England Home

  How wonderful it is to have you here today. Thank you so much for the visit my friends! I am also really grateful for having Ellen Sharpe of @featherglass on our “Beautiful Homes of Instagram” series. Ellen is a wonderful person and she has a home that should not only leave you inspired but also more relaxed… and get ready for this: her kitchen island seats eight! I am in love with her entire kitchen and I am sure you will love it too. Here, the homeowner explains more about her style:

  “To say I was thrilled when Luciane asked me to be a part of her “Beautiful Homes of Instagram” series is an understatement! When I had only dreams of doing my renovation and addition, HomeBunch was a major source of ideas and inspiration for me.

 I have always had a love of interior design. I would spend hours thumbing through magazines. But now with social media, there is so much design inspiration at your fingertips. During my renovation I started really working on building my instagram account to capture and share my process and ideas. It has been a wonderful experience where I have gotten to meet so many amazing people, including Luciane! I hope my followers are able to get daily bits of inspiration that they can translate into their own homes. I love when people reach out to me for design help and I am even able to offer remote design options.

My husband, my daughter and I (plus 2 adorable West Highland Terriers) live just 10 miles north of Boston Massachusetts in a small New England town. We bought our neglected little bungalow just down the street from where I grew up. Although it was in severe disrepair, the cottage like exterior and the stone chimney in front drew us to it. An initial renovation to make the house livable kept us happy there for years but ultimately we needed more space. We weighed our options and decided a renovation with a 2 story addition to include an open concept living space and master suite was what would work best for our family. 

To save money, we upcycle a lot of materials and use repurposed furnishings. My design style tends to be light, clean, classic and comfortable. I love mixing in some French and farmhouse elements as well.”

  Get ready to feel inspired and pin a lot!

  Beautiful Homes of Instagram: New England Home

The front of the house has remained the same and I love the Bungalow look it has. It looks really small and unassuming from the front, much like a classic cottage.

Color: Benjamin Moore Stonington Gray

Trim: Benjamin Moore Super White

Door Color: Benjamin Moore Black Panther

Front Door: Custom

Chimney: Natural Fieldstone

Front Porch Light: Progress Lighting Maison Collection Wall Mount Lantern

House Numbers: Pottery Barn Tree Branch House Numbers

Kitchen

 A big island and a gas range were a must because I love to cook.

The kitchen island sits 8!!! How dreamy is that?!!!

Counterstools: Cosmopolitan Beige Linen Counter Stools.

Window Sash: Benjamin Moore Black Panther

Paint Color & Countertop

Cabinets: Kraftmaid Shaker Style – unfinished and Painted in Benjamin Moore Advance Paint in Snowfall White.

Countertops and backsplash: White Princess Quartzite

Stove: Ilve Majestic 36 inch Italian Range

Dishwasher: Bosch panel ready dishwasher

Lighting

Linear Chandelier: Perryton 8 light Island Pendant – similar here.

Pot Filler Faucet: Rohl.

Kitchen Sink

One thing that is a little different in my kitchen is I have a corner sink. It may appear small but it is very deep and hides a lot of dirty dishes!

Faucet: Kohler K99261 Artifacts Pull Down Faucet.

Similar Kitchen Runner: here – Other Beautiful Runners: here, here, here, here, here, here, here & here.

Hardware

Hardware: Top Knobs Bin Pulls & Pulls.

Hutch Cabinet

I’m a bit obsessed with butler’s pantries and my space just did not allow for one. Instead, I decided to design a reduced depth bank of glass front cabinets that gives me all the storage I need.

Cremone Bolts: A29 6 foot Cast Iron Plain Window Cremone – similar here.

Hardware: Top Knobs Pulls & Appliances Pulls.

Dining Room

The dining room opens to a beautiful dining area with plenty of natural light.

Dining Table: RH – similar here & here.

Chairs: RH – similar here & here.

Chandelier: Hubberton Forge – similar here.

Textures

A reclaimed wood dining table adds the right amount of texture to this dining room.

The hurricanes were purchased at a local store but these are exactly the same: Cube Geometric Glass Terrarium.

Kitchen Sitting Area

The sitting area is one of my favorite rooms at Ellen’s home. How inviting and pretty! Paint color is Benjamin Moore Smoke and Mirrors CSP-105.

Trim: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Beam: Magnolia Beam by Old World Traditions

Light: Nadine 1 light Schoolhouse Pendant

Vintage Secretary: Painted in White Chalk Paint and distressed.

Oversized Chairs: West Elm Bliss Armchair

Pillow: Arhaus

Ottoman

This was a renovation project. It was a leather too mahogany ottoman that I refinished with white chalk paint and general finishes light brown dye stain to give a reclaimed wood look and covered the leather with batting and linen.

Beautiful Ottoman Coffee Tables: here, here, here & here.

Similar Knit Throw: here & here.

Chairs

Deconstructed Chairs: Four Hands Furniture – similar here, here, here, here & here.

Trim

Walls, Ceiling and Woodwork: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White.

Family Room

I come from a large family and we gather here often so for the interior space, we opted for an open concept. That entailed moving a steep center stairway to the second floor off to the back corner of the addition and doing the same floors throughout the entire first floor.

Woodwork/Ceiling and Walls : Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Coffee table: Vintage; refinished.

Sconces: Custom made with acorn glass shades – similar here.

Oversized Chairs (far left): West Elm

Sofa

Sofa: Rowe Furniture slipcovered in charcoal Linen – similar here, here & here.

Hardwood Flooring

Floors: Shaw Floors – Solid Prefinished Hickory Collection: Rio Grande Color: Grandview

Similar Olive Tree: Here.

Oversized Chair: West Elm

Staircase

I love the look of old stairways so something we did splurge on was a custom wreathed handrail that was handmade by James Dean of Jamesrdean.com

Details

Stair and railing Stain: Minwax Ebony – Twist Taper top wood balusters.

Woodwork and walls: Benjamin Moore Snowfall white

Front Room

Our Front Room is the one room on the first floor that is separate from the open concept space but still has a wide view into it. This room has the original wood burning fireplace and it’s where we gather when we watch television. Speaking of television…it’s hidden behind those distressed doors!

Linen Sofa: Arhaus Emory Grand Sofa.

Side Chair: Elton Chair West Elm

Rug

Jute Rug: Pottery Barn

Beautiful Deconstructed-style Sofa: Here.

Paint Color

Paint Color: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Similar Basket: Pottery Barn.

Chandelier

Chandelier: Lockhart Chandelier Pottery Barn.

Powder Room

Paint: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Tile: Marble Hexagon Tile

Sink: Signature Hardware

Light: Ariella Ovale Glass Pendant Light

Daughter’s Bedroom

This was the first room on the second floor to be complete. It connects to a spare bedroom with a shared bathroom with a small hallway between the 2 rooms.

Paint: Benjamin Moore Revere Pewter

Trim: Benjamin Moore Super White

Bed: Linen Nailhead Bed

Mini Chandelier: Gallery Versailles Wrought Iron And Crystal Mini Chandelier

Loveseat: Colette in Flax Beige Pier One Imports

Light Hardwood Flooring

Flooring: French Oak finished with Woca Lye in Driftwood White – similar here & here.

Doors: Jeld-wen Monroe Smooth

Hardware: Nostalgic Warehouse Meadows Plate in Timeless Bronze with Oval Crystal Glass Knob.

Paint Walls and Trim: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Master Bedroom

This space was one of my favorite to design and it was the last that we completed. I wanted the space to be serene and uncluttered. Future plans include planking the ceiling and picture frame molding on the walls.

French Doors with Opening Sidelights : Ashworth

Bed: Jardin From Frontgate, King

Paint Color & Fireplace

White Bedroom Paint Color:  Snowfall White by Benjamin Moore.

Fireplace: Valor Victorian Gas Fireplace/Windsor Style

Mantle: Antique Marble, Craigslist Find

TV: The Frame TV Samsung

Chandelier

Chandelier: Pottery Barn.

Linens: Pottery Barn.

Bedside Light: Chloe Mercury Glass Hobnail Task Lamp Pottery Barn.

Indulge

Vanity: Aberdeen 60 in Double Vanity with Open Shelf – Dove Grey – Home Decorators Collection

Sink Faucets: Symmons Allura Widespread Faucet in Chrome

Mirrors: Homegoods – similar here.

Lights: Elk 63039 Schoolhouse 1 Light Pendant.

Shower Wall: AZEK Trim boards custom cut into shiplap.

Master Bathroom

Even though not entirely complete as we still need glass shower doors, all the finishes came together nicely to create something fitting for a home built in New England in 1900 and still have a sleek clean feel.

Tub: Strom Solitude Acrylic Double Ended Pedestal Tub

Tub Faucet: Pfister Tisbury Wall Mount Tub Filler in Chrome

Paint Walls and Trim: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Tile: Allen and Roth Herringbone Marble – similar here & here.

Grout: Pure White

Mirror: HomeGoods – similar here  – Others: here, here, here & here.

Back View

Previously the back of the house had a pretty treacherous long set of stairs. We decided to break that up with a few steps down to a raised stone patio.

We utilized the help of Orazio Guevara Sr. from JustDrawit https://justdrawit.com/ to draw up our building plans. I knew I wanted to open up the back of the house to the outdoors and to flood the inside with natural light. The windows and doors on the first floor helped us achieve a classic New England look.

I always loved the look of copper gutters but that just wasn’t in our budget so we went with aluminum and chose the bronze color which gave us a similar look.

Carriage House

When we bought the house we were lucky enough to have a bonus detached space that we now refer to as the “carriage house”.

Exterior Siding: Benjamin Moore Stonington Gray

Exterior Trim: Benjamin Moore Super White

Interior

I tend to get a little more experimental in this space.

Walls and Trim: Benjamin Moore Super White

Floors: Wide Pine floor stained.

Shiplap

Gray Wood Walls: Rough Spruce with Greywash stain.

Ottoman: Restoration Hardware.

Table

Most of the furniture is up cycled and vintage items that I’ve refinished. Its a cozy and rustic retreat just steps from home!

Loft

2nd floor ceiling: Pine Tongue and Groove washed with a 1:1 ratio of water and flat white latex paint.

2nd Floor Coffee Table: Arhaus (no longer available) – Other beautiful coffee tables: here, here, here, here, here, here & here.

Floors: Wide Pine, painted white.

Wall Paint Color

Walls: Benjamin Moore Gray Owl

Main House Back Porch

Wall Lanterns: Quoizel Danville 8 inch outdoor light

Ceiling Fan: Litex E-KM52ABZ5CMR

Planters: Brugge Salvaged Wood and Metal Planters from Restoration Hardware.

Exterior Details

We designed a lot of detail into the woodwork around the windows and added some flairs to the upper portion of the siding. For this we enlisted the help of David Bilbilian of A&T Remodeling.

The addition was designed by me and built by my husband who owns and operates ProRestoration.

Trim : Azek

Siding: Cedar Shake

Gutters and Downspouts: Aluminum Bronze

Steps

We used bluestone for the patio material as it has a classic and timeless look.

Stone: Natural Fieldstone

Patio: 12 x 12 Bluestone tile

House Color: Benjamin Moore Stonington Gray

Trim: Benjamin Moore Super White

Doors and Windows: Andersen

Many thanks to Ellen Sharpe for sharing all of the details above. Make sure to follow @featherglass on Instagram for more inspiration!

Photography: Lorraine Jackson.

  Best Sales of the Month:

Thank you for shopping through Home Bunch. I would be happy to assist you if you have any questions or are looking for something in particular. Feel free to contact me and always make sure to check dimensions before ordering. Happy shopping!

  Serena & Lily: 20% off Dining Event. Use code: ENTERTAINING

  Wayfair: Up to 75% OFF – President’s Day Huge Sales on Decor, Furniture & Rugs!!!

  Joss & Main: End of Season Sale: Up to 85% Off!!! Free shipping with code: STARS

  Pottery Barn: 20% off + Free Shipping. Use Code: WEEKEND

  One Kings Lane: High Quality Design Decor for Less.

  West Elm: 20% Off your entire Purchase + Free Shipping: Use Code: WINTER

  Anthropologie: Take an extra 40% off all sale items!

  Urban Outfitters: Hip & Affordable Home Decor.

  Horchow: High Quality Furniture and Decor. Up to 30% off the entire site!

  Nordstrom: Up to 40% OFF!

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  Posts of the Week:

Small Lot Modern Farmhouse.

  2019 New Year Home Tour.

Family-friendly Home Design.

Newlyweds Home Design.

  City Lot Modern Farmhouse.

Family Home Renovation with Casual Interiors.

2018 Norton Children’s Hospital Raffle Home.

Transitional Custom Home Design.

Beautiful Homes of Instagram: Canada.

Beautiful Homes of Instagram.

Southern Beach House with Modern Interiors.

Florida Vacation Home Style.

Beautiful Homes of Instagram: Lake House.

Black and White Interior Design Ideas.

Interior Design Ideas: Designer’s Home.

Interior Design Ideas: Colorful Interiors.

Florida New-Construction Family Home.

Interior Design: Ideas House Tour.

Custom Home with Artisan Craftsmanship Interiors.

Traditional Kitchen Reno Ideas.

Interior Design Ideas: New Orleans Home.

You can follow my pins here: Pinterest/HomeBunch

See more Inspiring Interior Design Ideas in my Archives.

“Dear God,

If I am wrong, right me. If I am lost, guide me. If I start to give-up, keep me going.

Lead me in Light and Love”.

Have a wonderful day, my friends and we’ll talk again tomorrow.”

with Love,

Luciane from HomeBunch.com

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[elizabethcariasa]

OUR HOME // LIVING ROOM + DINING ROOM

IT’S FINALLY HERE!! I have been waiting to share our dining room and living room design with you for so long and excited to finally show you the big reveal. My talented friend Anne helped to bring our vision to life.  Anne and I collaborated on my master bedroom redesign and after the success of that project, we wanted to move through the house and start working through the space.

Our living room and dining room are both one open space and with our old furniture, felt a bit cramped. We just didn’t have the right elements to create the perfect open feel. One of my biggest priorities for the space was to not lose any storage that we currently had. Of course we were replacing all cabinets in both the dining room and living room but my biggest concern was making sure we streamlined the space without losing that precious concealed storage. Room and Board ended up being the perfect solution for our storage needs. We chose the Hudson Custom Cabinet system so that we could build out exactly what we needed. Custom sizing for small spaces can be key to maximizing every square inch of your space. For the living room, we wanted to open up the wall with the tv to create more breathing room for art pieces and other decor items. We combined 2 custom storage units to create the illusion of 1 long unit. Anne always knows how to add warmth to a space and she helped to pick out this white washed wood which still feels nice and light and airy. We were able to hide all of our electronics like the cable box etc which leaves the space feeling clean and clutter free. For the dining room, I needed enough storage to stow away all of our dining entertaining pieces and we chose to use the same hudson cabinet system to tie both spaces together. These are some of my favorite pieces in the space and are made so much more special since they are our own custom creations. I would not have been able to get that maximum storage without being able to really fit our space perfectly. Another big important element for our space: the couch. I can not tell you how long it took to find this piece. I originally had a couch in our space that was too large and it really crammed our living room and dining room together. Our goal was to find a slightly smaller couch that still had a chaise. I was very skeptical to buy a couch online without testing it out first but after months of looking for configurations, Anne and I were hitting a wall. We finally discovered Maiden Home. I hadn’t heard of their company until Anne mentioned them to me. What I loved was that they have a collection of a few key pieces that can be custom configured and with a short lead time so you don’t have to wait forever for your custom pieces. The Warren couch checked all the boxes for me: modern, the perfect size, and cozy! My issue with alot of modern couches are that they aren’t lounge worth and for Blake and I both love to lay down and nap on our couch so comfort and design were key. Another key factor for our couch was the fabric. With 2 cats, 1 dog, and 1 newborn baby, I wanted to make sure what we chose was durable. I was very excited that Maiden Home offers Crypton fabrics. If you remember, we chose crypton fabrics for our bedframe and the chair in our bedroom because of their durability and ease to clean. So we lived my dream and picked out the most beautiful white linen fabric. I know, I know, white couch with a newborn? Thank goodness it’s easy to clean. To style the couch, we picked out some gorgeous neutral pillows from The Little Market because I am obsessed with all their products. We also mixed in 2 more graphic pillows from the Block Shop.

For the dining room, I originally had a small 4 seater table but wanted to larger table with seating for 6. Since we sized down on our couch, we were able to push it forward about a foot leaving more precious space for a new dining table and chairs. We created my dream table, the parsons design from Room and Board. I am a sucker for marble but know that it can be so hard to upkeep and keep stain free since it’s so sensitive to so many things. So I wanted to pick something that had a marble feel but way more durable for long term wear and tear. We chose the marbled white quartz that has a beautiful finish and has been holding up great. To give the dining area some contrast and a modern twist, we picked out these leather sling chairs from Room and Board. They are honestly so comfortable and are super easy to wipe down. My nephews come over all the time and put their sticky food fingers on everything and they have been so easy to clean up after by simply just wiping them down. Another big element for the dining room was the gallery wall. I wanted a place to be able to display some artwork and be able to easily update over time. We went with some long white ledge shelves so it would be easy to lean artwork and change it out on a whim. For the artwork, we picked out all different pieces from Minted. Their selection was huge and it was easy to get different framed and matted styles of pictures to create a great textured gallery wall. To fill the rest of the shelves and top of the storage piece, we combined both vintage and new items to finish off the styling. Anne brought some incredible vintage ceramic pieces and we added some beautiful handmade woven pieces from The Little Market. The last big piece on the table top was a vase from Perigold. Love how the metallic detail works as a sculptural element. Above the dining room table we added wiring for a chandelier. I wanted to do something more modern here and love this chandelier from Craftmade. We also installed a dimmer because I am all about custom lighting options for setting a moody dinner scene.

Moving on to the living room, besides the sofa, we needed some other elements to finish off that space. We found these two side tables to place next to the couch. Blake has been hoarding the bronze one to work on his laptop and I have been using the cute little wooden stool to place my morning coffee. We also picked out a statement floor lamp from Perigold which at first I didn’t know if we truly needed but I feel it really ties that corner of the room together. Next up was the coffee table. It was SO hard to find the right height and size we needed. We ended up finding this one at Target and it’s even on sale now! Target has been killing it in the furniture game lately and this was an amazing find. We have so many dark accents thrown into the design mix to balance out all the light neutral tones. We wanted to also add an additional seating option to our living room since we picked a smaller sofa. We picked out this sexy sling chair from Maiden Home which is made of cowhide. I know, another white seating area but cowhide is super durable and easy to clean. It’s so comfortable (even though it doesn’t look it!). I love modern design but if it’s not cozy, no thank you. This chair checks both boxes: sexy and comfy. We styled it with a pillow from Accompany which adds to the cozy factor when sitting in it. To finish off the room we had to pick a rug. While I was obsessed with my old rug, Anne convinced me to open myself up to changing things up and freshening up the space with a new rug. We picked out this neutral option from Jaipur Living which has a great slight texture to it,

When it came to decorating the top of our media units, this is where I really turn to Anne because she is a styling GENIUS. She first headed to her local used book store for a variety of coffee table books. This is a great tip if you want to stock up on coffee table books but don’t want to spend hundreds of dollars on amazon buying new ones. We added more framed pieces from Minted leaning against the wall in a variety of sizes. One of my favorite pieces here is this wooden bowl set and beads from St. Frank. It was all about little details too like these little nesting bowls from Accompany and this killer table lamp is a favorite from Perigold. We also found these vases from Accompany that added a fun metallic detail to the decor. We also finally mounted out tv on the wall which makes things look so much cleaner.

For our front door entryway, I had purchased this round mirror from CB2 months ago in anticipation of using it in our entryway. We picked out this shelf from CB2 as well and styled it with some vintage items and a framed print from Minted. For the rug runner, Anne picked out this one from Jaipur Living that adds a fun print to the space and gives the entry a nice dose of texture for right when you walk in the door.

In our bar area, we replaced our open rolling bar cart with this amazing little cabinet from Target. Anne inspired this little diy project since she had recently bought the larger version of this cabinet and decided we need to paint it. Such a fun way to customize this for our design scheme. The little table top lamp from Urban Electric pulls in more of that gold/bronze color we have throughout the space. And then the show stopping framed textile from St. Frank finishing off this little corner.

The last area of the living room is the garage entryway. We knew we wanted to incorporate a large piece of artwork and rework my existing single sconce. We picked out a big framed photo from Minted and flanked it with 2 modern sconces from Craftmade. To finish off that area we have this custom sized wooden bench from Skram Furniture which was perfect since we needed something to fit the space perfectly.

Now that the space is finished, I just can’t wait to get cozy on the couch or even just enjoy dinner with Blake at home. Never underestimate the power of a good decor facelift to really change the way you use and feel in your home. It has the power to change your mood and can add so much more comfort to your home. Anne is a genius and I always love how we bring our combined vision to life. Next up, the nursery! We are also so excited to have the space featured over on MyDomaine here. You can read more about our design vision and how the space came to life.

Entryway 1 Mirror: CB2 / shelf: CB2 / art: minted / rug: jaipur living

Entryway 2 Bench: skram furniture / art: minted / sconces: craftmade

Living Room Couch: maiden home / Rug: jaipur living / end tables: perigold / coffee table: target / pillows: the little market, block shop, IKEA / arm chair: maiden home / arm chair pillow: accompany / floor lamp: perigold / Media units: Room and Board / lamp: perigold / small wooden bowls + vases: accompany / large wooden bowls + beads: st. frank / artwork: minted

Dining Room Cabinet: room and board / artwork: minted / shelves: room and board / woven decor: the little market / vase: perigold / chandelier: craftmade / table: room and board / chairs: room and board

Bar Area Cabinet: target / lamp: urban electric / artwork: st. frank

photos by Monica Wang

The post OUR HOME // LIVING ROOM + DINING ROOM appeared first on eat.sleep.wear. - Fashion & Lifestyle Blog by Kimberly Pesch.

[kurtwarren54]

OUR HOME // LIVING ROOM + DINING ROOM

IT’S FINALLY HERE!! I have been waiting to share our dining room and living room design with you for so long and excited to finally show you the big reveal. My talented friend Anne helped to bring our vision to life.  Anne and I collaborated on my master bedroom redesign and after the success of that project, we wanted to move through the house and start working through the space.

Our living room and dining room are both one open space and with our old furniture, felt a bit cramped. We just didn’t have the right elements to create the perfect open feel. One of my biggest priorities for the space was to not lose any storage that we currently had. Of course we were replacing all cabinets in both the dining room and living room but my biggest concern was making sure we streamlined the space without losing that precious concealed storage. Room and Board ended up being the perfect solution for our storage needs. We chose the Hudson Custom Cabinet system so that we could build out exactly what we needed. Custom sizing for small spaces can be key to maximizing every square inch of your space. For the living room, we wanted to open up the wall with the tv to create more breathing room for art pieces and other decor items. We combined 2 custom storage units to create the illusion of 1 long unit. Anne always knows how to add warmth to a space and she helped to pick out this white washed wood which still feels nice and light and airy. We were able to hide all of our electronics like the cable box etc which leaves the space feeling clean and clutter free. For the dining room, I needed enough storage to stow away all of our dining entertaining pieces and we chose to use the same hudson cabinet system to tie both spaces together. These are some of my favorite pieces in the space and are made so much more special since they are our own custom creations. I would not have been able to get that maximum storage without being able to really fit our space perfectly. Another big important element for our space: the couch. I can not tell you how long it took to find this piece. I originally had a couch in our space that was too large and it really crammed our living room and dining room together. Our goal was to find a slightly smaller couch that still had a chaise. I was very skeptical to buy a couch online without testing it out first but after months of looking for configurations, Anne and I were hitting a wall. We finally discovered Maiden Home. I hadn’t heard of their company until Anne mentioned them to me. What I loved was that they have a collection of a few key pieces that can be custom configured and with a short lead time so you don’t have to wait forever for your custom pieces. The Warren couch checked all the boxes for me: modern, the perfect size, and cozy! My issue with alot of modern couches are that they aren’t lounge worth and for Blake and I both love to lay down and nap on our couch so comfort and design were key. Another key factor for our couch was the fabric. With 2 cats, 1 dog, and 1 newborn baby, I wanted to make sure what we chose was durable. I was very excited that Maiden Home offers Crypton fabrics. If you remember, we chose crypton fabrics for our bedframe and the chair in our bedroom because of their durability and ease to clean. So we lived my dream and picked out the most beautiful white linen fabric. I know, I know, white couch with a newborn? Thank goodness it’s easy to clean. To style the couch, we picked out some gorgeous neutral pillows from The Little Market because I am obsessed with all their products. We also mixed in 2 more graphic pillows from the Block Shop.

For the dining room, I originally had a small 4 seater table but wanted to larger table with seating for 6. Since we sized down on our couch, we were able to push it forward about a foot leaving more precious space for a new dining table and chairs. We created my dream table, the parsons design from Room and Board. I am a sucker for marble but know that it can be so hard to upkeep and keep stain free since it’s so sensitive to so many things. So I wanted to pick something that had a marble feel but way more durable for long term wear and tear. We chose the marbled white quartz that has a beautiful finish and has been holding up great. To give the dining area some contrast and a modern twist, we picked out these leather sling chairs from Room and Board. They are honestly so comfortable and are super easy to wipe down. My nephews come over all the time and put their sticky food fingers on everything and they have been so easy to clean up after by simply just wiping them down. Another big element for the dining room was the gallery wall. I wanted a place to be able to display some artwork and be able to easily update over time. We went with some long white ledge shelves so it would be easy to lean artwork and change it out on a whim. For the artwork, we picked out all different pieces from Minted. Their selection was huge and it was easy to get different framed and matted styles of pictures to create a great textured gallery wall. To fill the rest of the shelves and top of the storage piece, we combined both vintage and new items to finish off the styling. Anne brought some incredible vintage ceramic pieces and we added some beautiful handmade woven pieces from The Little Market. The last big piece on the table top was a vase from Perigold. Love how the metallic detail works as a sculptural element. Above the dining room table we added wiring for a chandelier. I wanted to do something more modern here and love this chandelier from Craftmade. We also installed a dimmer because I am all about custom lighting options for setting a moody dinner scene.

Moving on to the living room, besides the sofa, we needed some other elements to finish off that space. We found these two side tables to place next to the couch. Blake has been hoarding the bronze one to work on his laptop and I have been using the cute little wooden stool to place my morning coffee. We also picked out a statement floor lamp from Perigold which at first I didn’t know if we truly needed but I feel it really ties that corner of the room together. Next up was the coffee table. It was SO hard to find the right height and size we needed. We ended up finding this one at Target and it’s even on sale now! Target has been killing it in the furniture game lately and this was an amazing find. We have so many dark accents thrown into the design mix to balance out all the light neutral tones. We wanted to also add an additional seating option to our living room since we picked a smaller sofa. We picked out this sexy sling chair from Maiden Home which is made of cowhide. I know, another white seating area but cowhide is super durable and easy to clean. It’s so comfortable (even though it doesn’t look it!). I love modern design but if it’s not cozy, no thank you. This chair checks both boxes: sexy and comfy. We styled it with a pillow from Accompany which adds to the cozy factor when sitting in it. To finish off the room we had to pick a rug. While I was obsessed with my old rug, Anne convinced me to open myself up to changing things up and freshening up the space with a new rug. We picked out this neutral option from Jaipur Living which has a great slight texture to it,

When it came to decorating the top of our media units, this is where I really turn to Anne because she is a styling GENIUS. She first headed to her local used book store for a variety of coffee table books. This is a great tip if you want to stock up on coffee table books but don’t want to spend hundreds of dollars on amazon buying new ones. We added more framed pieces from Minted leaning against the wall in a variety of sizes. One of my favorite pieces here is this wooden bowl set and beads from St. Frank. It was all about little details too like these little nesting bowls from Accompany and this killer table lamp is a favorite from Perigold. We also found these vases from Accompany that added a fun metallic detail to the decor. We also finally mounted out tv on the wall which makes things look so much cleaner.

For our front door entryway, I had purchased this round mirror from CB2 months ago in anticipation of using it in our entryway. We picked out this shelf from CB2 as well and styled it with some vintage items and a framed print from Minted. For the rug runner, Anne picked out this one from Jaipur Living that adds a fun print to the space and gives the entry a nice dose of texture for right when you walk in the door.

In our bar area, we replaced our open rolling bar cart with this amazing little cabinet from Target. Anne inspired this little diy project since she had recently bought the larger version of this cabinet and decided we need to paint it. Such a fun way to customize this for our design scheme. The little table top lamp from Urban Electric pulls in more of that gold/bronze color we have throughout the space. And then the show stopping framed textile from St. Frank finishing off this little corner.

The last area of the living room is the garage entryway. We knew we wanted to incorporate a large piece of artwork and rework my existing single sconce. We picked out a big framed photo from Minted and flanked it with 2 modern sconces from Craftmade. To finish off that area we have this custom sized wooden bench from Skram Furniture which was perfect since we needed something to fit the space perfectly.

Now that the space is finished, I just can’t wait to get cozy on the couch or even just enjoy dinner with Blake at home. Never underestimate the power of a good decor facelift to really change the way you use and feel in your home. It has the power to change your mood and can add so much more comfort to your home. Anne is a genius and I always love how we bring our combined vision to life. Next up, the nursery! We are also so excited to have the space featured over on MyDomaine here. You can read more about our design vision and how the space came to life.

Entryway 1 Mirror: CB2 / shelf: CB2 / art: minted / rug: jaipur living

Entryway 2 Bench: skram furniture / art: minted / sconces: craftmade

Living Room Couch: maiden home / Rug: jaipur living / end tables: perigold / coffee table: target / pillows: the little market, block shop, IKEA / arm chair: maiden home / arm chair pillow: accompany / floor lamp: perigold / Media units: Room and Board / lamp: perigold / small wooden bowls + vases: accompany / large wooden bowls + beads: st. frank / artwork: minted

Dining Room Cabinet: room and board / artwork: minted / shelves: room and board / woven decor: the little market / vase: perigold / chandelier: craftmade / table: room and board / chairs: room and board

Bar Area Cabinet: target / lamp: urban electric / artwork: st. frank

photos by Monica Wang

The post OUR HOME // LIVING ROOM + DINING ROOM appeared first on eat.sleep.wear. - Fashion & Lifestyle Blog by Kimberly Pesch.

from Wellness https://www.eatsleepwear.com/2018/10/04/our-home-living-room-dining-room/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

[samuelmmarcus]

Beautiful Homes of Instagram: New England Home

  How wonderful it is to have you here today. Thank you so much for the visit my friends! I am also really grateful for having Ellen Sharpe of @featherglass on our “Beautiful Homes of Instagram” series. Ellen is a wonderful person and she has a home that should not only leave you inspired but also more relaxed… and get ready for this: her kitchen island seats eight! I am in love with her entire kitchen and I am sure you will love it too. Here, the homeowner explains more about her style:

  “To say I was thrilled when Luciane asked me to be a part of her “Beautiful Homes of Instagram” series is an understatement! When I had only dreams of doing my renovation and addition, HomeBunch was a major source of ideas and inspiration for me.

 I have always had a love of interior design. I would spend hours thumbing through magazines. But now with social media, there is so much design inspiration at your fingertips. During my renovation I started really working on building my instagram account to capture and share my process and ideas. It has been a wonderful experience where I have gotten to meet so many amazing people, including Luciane! I hope my followers are able to get daily bits of inspiration that they can translate into their own homes. I love when people reach out to me for design help and I am even able to offer remote design options.

My husband, my daughter and I (plus 2 adorable West Highland Terriers) live just 10 miles north of Boston Massachusetts in a small New England town. We bought our neglected little bungalow just down the street from where I grew up. Although it was in severe disrepair, the cottage like exterior and the stone chimney in front drew us to it. An initial renovation to make the house livable kept us happy there for years but ultimately we needed more space. We weighed our options and decided a renovation with a 2 story addition to include an open concept living space and master suite was what would work best for our family. 

To save money, we upcycle a lot of materials and use repurposed furnishings. My design style tends to be light, clean, classic and comfortable. I love mixing in some French and farmhouse elements as well.”

  Get ready to feel inspired and pin a lot!

  Beautiful Homes of Instagram: New England Home

The front of the house has remained the same and I love the Bungalow look it has. It looks really small and unassuming from the front, much like a classic cottage.

Color: Benjamin Moore Stonington Gray

Trim: Benjamin Moore Super White

Door Color: Benjamin Moore Black Panther

Front Door: Custom

Chimney: Natural Fieldstone

Front Porch Light: Progress Lighting Maison Collection Wall Mount Lantern

House Numbers: Pottery Barn Tree Branch House Numbers

Kitchen

 A big island and a gas range were a must because I love to cook.

The kitchen island sits 8!!! How dreamy is that?!!!

Counterstools: Cosmopolitan Beige Linen Counter Stools.

Window Sash: Benjamin Moore Black Panther

Paint Color & Countertop

Cabinets: Kraftmaid Shaker Style – unfinished and Painted in Benjamin Moore Advance Paint in Snowfall White.

Countertops and backsplash: White Princess Quartzite

Stove: Ilve Majestic 36 inch Italian Range

Dishwasher: Bosch panel ready dishwasher

Lighting

Linear Chandelier: Perryton 8 light Island Pendant – similar here.

Pot Filler Faucet: Rohl.

Kitchen Sink

One thing that is a little different in my kitchen is I have a corner sink. It may appear small but it is very deep and hides a lot of dirty dishes!

Faucet: Kohler K99261 Artifacts Pull Down Faucet.

Similar Kitchen Runner: here – Other Beautiful Runners: here, here, here, here, here, here, here & here.

Hardware

Hardware: Top Knobs Bin Pulls & Pulls.

Hutch Cabinet

I’m a bit obsessed with butler’s pantries and my space just did not allow for one. Instead, I decided to design a reduced depth bank of glass front cabinets that gives me all the storage I need.

Cremone Bolts: A29 6 foot Cast Iron Plain Window Cremone – similar here.

Hardware: Top Knobs Pulls & Appliances Pulls.

Dining Room

The dining room opens to a beautiful dining area with plenty of natural light.

Dining Table: RH – similar here & here.

Chairs: RH – similar here & here.

Chandelier: Hubberton Forge – similar here.

Textures

A reclaimed wood dining table adds the right amount of texture to this dining room.

The hurricanes were purchased at a local store but these are exactly the same: Cube Geometric Glass Terrarium.

Kitchen Sitting Area

The sitting area is one of my favorite rooms at Ellen’s home. How inviting and pretty! Paint color is Benjamin Moore Smoke and Mirrors CSP-105.

Trim: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Beam: Magnolia Beam by Old World Traditions

Light: Nadine 1 light Schoolhouse Pendant

Vintage Secretary: Painted in White Chalk Paint and distressed.

Oversized Chairs: West Elm Bliss Armchair

Pillow: Arhaus

Ottoman

This was a renovation project. It was a leather too mahogany ottoman that I refinished with white chalk paint and general finishes light brown dye stain to give a reclaimed wood look and covered the leather with batting and linen.

Beautiful Ottoman Coffee Tables: here, here, here & here.

Similar Knit Throw: here & here.

Chairs

Deconstructed Chairs: Four Hands Furniture – similar here, here, here, here & here.

Trim

Walls, Ceiling and Woodwork: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White.

Family Room

I come from a large family and we gather here often so for the interior space, we opted for an open concept. That entailed moving a steep center stairway to the second floor off to the back corner of the addition and doing the same floors throughout the entire first floor.

Woodwork/Ceiling and Walls : Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Coffee table: Vintage; refinished.

Sconces: Custom made with acorn glass shades – similar here.

Oversized Chairs (far left): West Elm

Sofa

Sofa: Rowe Furniture slipcovered in charcoal Linen – similar here, here & here.

Hardwood Flooring

Floors: Shaw Floors – Solid Prefinished Hickory Collection: Rio Grande Color: Grandview

Similar Olive Tree: Here.

Oversized Chair: West Elm

Staircase

I love the look of old stairways so something we did splurge on was a custom wreathed handrail that was handmade by James Dean of Jamesrdean.com

Details

Stair and railing Stain: Minwax Ebony – Twist Taper top wood balusters.

Woodwork and walls: Benjamin Moore Snowfall white

Front Room

Our Front Room is the one room on the first floor that is separate from the open concept space but still has a wide view into it. This room has the original wood burning fireplace and it’s where we gather when we watch television. Speaking of television…it’s hidden behind those distressed doors!

Linen Sofa: Arhaus Emory Grand Sofa.

Side Chair: Elton Chair West Elm

Rug

Jute Rug: Pottery Barn

Beautiful Deconstructed-style Sofa: Here.

Paint Color

Paint Color: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Similar Basket: Pottery Barn.

Chandelier

Chandelier: Lockhart Chandelier Pottery Barn.

Powder Room

Paint: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Tile: Marble Hexagon Tile

Sink: Signature Hardware

Light: Ariella Ovale Glass Pendant Light

Daughter’s Bedroom

This was the first room on the second floor to be complete. It connects to a spare bedroom with a shared bathroom with a small hallway between the 2 rooms.

Paint: Benjamin Moore Revere Pewter

Trim: Benjamin Moore Super White

Bed: Linen Nailhead Bed

Mini Chandelier: Gallery Versailles Wrought Iron And Crystal Mini Chandelier

Loveseat: Colette in Flax Beige Pier One Imports

Light Hardwood Flooring

Flooring: French Oak finished with Woca Lye in Driftwood White – similar here & here.

Doors: Jeld-wen Monroe Smooth

Hardware: Nostalgic Warehouse Meadows Plate in Timeless Bronze with Oval Crystal Glass Knob.

Paint Walls and Trim: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Master Bedroom

This space was one of my favorite to design and it was the last that we completed. I wanted the space to be serene and uncluttered. Future plans include planking the ceiling and picture frame molding on the walls.

French Doors with Opening Sidelights : Ashworth

Bed: Jardin From Frontgate, King

Paint Color & Fireplace

White Bedroom Paint Color:  Snowfall White by Benjamin Moore.

Fireplace: Valor Victorian Gas Fireplace/Windsor Style

Mantle: Antique Marble, Craigslist Find

TV: The Frame TV Samsung

Chandelier

Chandelier: Pottery Barn.

Linens: Pottery Barn.

Bedside Light: Chloe Mercury Glass Hobnail Task Lamp Pottery Barn.

Indulge

Vanity: Aberdeen 60 in Double Vanity with Open Shelf – Dove Grey – Home Decorators Collection

Sink Faucets: Symmons Allura Widespread Faucet in Chrome

Mirrors: Homegoods – similar here.

Lights: Elk 63039 Schoolhouse 1 Light Pendant.

Shower Wall: AZEK Trim boards custom cut into shiplap.

Master Bathroom

Even though not entirely complete as we still need glass shower doors, all the finishes came together nicely to create something fitting for a home built in New England in 1900 and still have a sleek clean feel.

Tub: Strom Solitude Acrylic Double Ended Pedestal Tub

Tub Faucet: Pfister Tisbury Wall Mount Tub Filler in Chrome

Paint Walls and Trim: Benjamin Moore Snowfall White

Tile: Allen and Roth Herringbone Marble – similar here & here.

Grout: Pure White

Mirror: HomeGoods – similar here  – Others: here, here, here & here.

Back View

Previously the back of the house had a pretty treacherous long set of stairs. We decided to break that up with a few steps down to a raised stone patio.

We utilized the help of Orazio Guevara Sr. from JustDrawit https://justdrawit.com/ to draw up our building plans. I knew I wanted to open up the back of the house to the outdoors and to flood the inside with natural light. The windows and doors on the first floor helped us achieve a classic New England look.

I always loved the look of copper gutters but that just wasn’t in our budget so we went with aluminum and chose the bronze color which gave us a similar look.

Carriage House

When we bought the house we were lucky enough to have a bonus detached space that we now refer to as the “carriage house”.

Exterior Siding: Benjamin Moore Stonington Gray

Exterior Trim: Benjamin Moore Super White

Interior

I tend to get a little more experimental in this space.

Walls and Trim: Benjamin Moore Super White

Floors: Wide Pine floor stained.

Shiplap

Gray Wood Walls: Rough Spruce with Greywash stain.

Ottoman: Restoration Hardware.

Table

Most of the furniture is up cycled and vintage items that I’ve refinished. Its a cozy and rustic retreat just steps from home!

Loft

2nd floor ceiling: Pine Tongue and Groove washed with a 1:1 ratio of water and flat white latex paint.

2nd Floor Coffee Table: Arhaus (no longer available) – Other beautiful coffee tables: here, here, here, here, here, here & here.

Floors: Wide Pine, painted white.

Wall Paint Color

Walls: Benjamin Moore Gray Owl

Main House Back Porch

Wall Lanterns: Quoizel Danville 8 inch outdoor light

Ceiling Fan: Litex E-KM52ABZ5CMR

Planters: Brugge Salvaged Wood and Metal Planters from Restoration Hardware.

Exterior Details

We designed a lot of detail into the woodwork around the windows and added some flairs to the upper portion of the siding. For this we enlisted the help of David Bilbilian of A&T Remodeling.

The addition was designed by me and built by my husband who owns and operates ProRestoration.

Trim : Azek

Siding: Cedar Shake

Gutters and Downspouts: Aluminum Bronze

Steps

We used bluestone for the patio material as it has a classic and timeless look.

Stone: Natural Fieldstone

Patio: 12 x 12 Bluestone tile

House Color: Benjamin Moore Stonington Gray

Trim: Benjamin Moore Super White

Doors and Windows: Andersen

Many thanks to Ellen Sharpe for sharing all of the details above. Make sure to follow @featherglass on Instagram for more inspiration!

Photography: Lorraine Jackson.

  Best Sales of the Month:

Thank you for shopping through Home Bunch. I would be happy to assist you if you have any questions or are looking for something in particular. Feel free to contact me and always make sure to check dimensions before ordering. Happy shopping!

  Serena & Lily: 20% off Dining Event. Use code: ENTERTAINING

  Wayfair: Up to 75% OFF – President’s Day Huge Sales on Decor, Furniture & Rugs!!!

  Joss & Main: End of Season Sale: Up to 85% Off!!! Free shipping with code: STARS

  Pottery Barn: 20% off + Free Shipping. Use Code: WEEKEND

  One Kings Lane: High Quality Design Decor for Less.

  West Elm: 20% Off your entire Purchase + Free Shipping: Use Code: WINTER

  Anthropologie: Take an extra 40% off all sale items!

  Urban Outfitters: Hip & Affordable Home Decor.

  Horchow: High Quality Furniture and Decor. Up to 30% off the entire site!

  Nordstrom: Up to 40% OFF!

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You can follow my pins here: Pinterest/HomeBunch

See more Inspiring Interior Design Ideas in my Archives.

���Dear God,

If I am wrong, right me. If I am lost, guide me. If I start to give-up, keep me going.

Lead me in Light and Love”.

Have a wonderful day, my friends and we’ll talk again tomorrow.”

with Love,

Luciane from HomeBunch.com

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[additionallysad]

Making A Light & Airy Living Room (That’s Still Livable!) https://ift.tt/2T6InCe

Just when you thought the duplex was getting all the action, we snuck in some beach house updates. The backyard is slowly starting to come together (shed! patio! fence! I CAN’T WAIT to show it to you once it gets a little further along!!) but today we’re diving into our lightener & brighter (and much beachier) living room.

Now this place actually looks like it’s a few blocks from the beach! And the bonus is that everything is sand and popsicle friendly – which is a must for us (we pack this place with family and friends and all the kids). So our goal was never to make it too precious. In other words, we were going for a light and airy look… but it had to be durable, wipeable, and as close to worry-free as we could get it!

sofa | side table | coffee table | rug | bookcase | lamps | wall: SW White Heron | trim: SW Stone Isle

We wanted to use some of the furniture we designed, including one of our new sofas (performance fabric = all the yesses). So we started with our Mellow sofa. It’s sold out right now, but our other two sofas – the Pivot and the Spiffy – are discounted just for the next few days thanks to a Joss & Main’s flash sale (they’ve got different names on J&M for some reason). A lot of things are at the lowest prices they’ve ever been ($699 for the sofas!) so if you’ve had your eye on one of our designs, it’s a pretty great time to check it out.

sofa | side table | coffee table | rug | lamp | chandelier| wall: SW White Heron | trim: SW Stone Isle

Sadly, our trusty old Ikea sectional (Karl the Karlstad, remember?) was ready for retirement (aka: donation). The problem with moving a sectional from house to house to house (we moved it from our second house, to our current house, and then to the beach house over the last eight years) is that sometimes the space would be better suited for a sofa… but you have a sectional… so you just sort of keep moving it around and trying to make the best of it.

We could kind of make sense of it it photos, but in real life there were awkward things like the chaise cutting into the doorway. We tried putting the chaise on the other end of the living room (it’s reversible), but it wasn’t any better because it meant we couldn’t have the extra seating over there, which really comes in handy and gets used a lot.

So as we mentioned a few weeks ago on the podcast, after eight awesome years with Karl, we donated him to a local charity that we love, and he’s living it up with a sweet new family. His legacy lives on. (*cue that Celine Dion song from Titanic*).

Another way that we tried to make this room feel lighter and airier was the patterned gray rug that we bought to replace the vintage one below (which happily lives in a bedroom at the duplex now). OMG that was meant to be in there, guys.

Along with our rug switch, the new sofa is a HUGE step forward in lightening things up. Plus its smaller footprint meant there was room for a few more functional furnishings. Like, momma finally gets a side table on her end of the couch. Hello reading lamp! Hello spot for my tea!

sofa | side table | coffee table | rug | lamp | baskets | bookcase | chandelier

Also, a word about white wood furniture: it’s a GREAT WAY to achieve a lighter look that’s still livable (it’s all wipeable, but it looks so nice and bright). So if you’re staring at a space you’d love to lighten up, sometimes it’s as simple as a $15 quart of white paint with primer built in (we recently tried Behr Marquee and it had great coverage) and you can redo your coffee table and your end tables – or even a bookcase or a shelving unit in an afternoon. Light walls and white (gloriously washable) curtains help too!

The three tiers on our side table = all the spots for magazines, a basket full of legos, or whatever else you like to keep at arm’s length. We actually ordered two more of the same side tables for the duplex because we love it so much. It also comes in a smaller version (which is super marked down right now) and you know I want to make a coffee table version, so stay tuned!

side table | top art | bottom art | vase | lamp | baskets | pink pillow | blue pillow

I also hung some new art that I bought through an artist I found on Instagram. Her name is Sarah Madeira Day and her stuff is just beautiful and so well priced. These two 8 x 8″ canvas prints were $25 each! Printed on canvas with gorgeous vibrant colors! I just love them – and I framed them in simple Ribba frames from Ikea that I already had (with linen-like fabric behind them, which adds some really pretty texture and a double-mat effect).

And as much as we liked the coffee table we DIYed last summer, the dark wood legs started to feel pretty busy – especially as the room got lighter. So we carried over one of these coffee tables that we ordered for the duplex. I’m liking how visually airy it is and the size is better for the space, so I may end up ordering another one to make up for the one I yoinked from the duplex.

Also, John and I burst out laughing when we realized that we basically recreated this photoshoot set-up in our beach house. Even the rugs are similar!

It kind of makes sense that it would happen that way, because we chose some of our favorite stuff for that photo… so I love seeing it living together at the beach house now. Especially mixed with other stuff that we love (that CB2 ladder shelf is so glossy and gorgeous in person, and I feel a deep and meaningful connection to our pretty pink lamp from Target).

Funny story about this coffee table. A couple weeks after that photoshoot, John shot up in bed nervous that the scallops around the outside were a terrible idea. His concern was that it was going to prevent people from kicking their feet up on it (to which I said: “but not everyone puts their feet on the coffee table, right?”).

So imagine his palpable relief when he realized that his legs easily fit between the shallow rounded scallops, and he actually proclaimed it to be more comfortable than our coffee table at home (which also has a small lip on top, but it’s sharper and not rounded/smoothed out).

We’re also happy to report that the edge doesn’t get in the way of other tabletop activities like board games (you know we LOVE OUR BOARD GAMES). Actually the border does a nice job of corralling things. You know, if one of your crazy bear creations gets out of hand or you’re rolling dice and don’t want them flying all over the place. So if you DMed me about that, here’s your answer: works great for family board games – the scallops aren’t nearly tall enough to block your arms or anything like that.

I also had someone message me to say “be sure to put a shallow little remote drawer in your next coffee table design!” and the good news is that this one already has one! I love a little hidden drawer to keep that stuff contained.

Also a note on living room layouts, because I FEEL YOU OUT THERE. THEY ARE HARD. This room has been evolving for over a year and a half now (I know, it feels like just yesterday that we furnished the beach house!), and we still have plans to mount the TV on the wall, possibly paint the walls, and change out those diamond backed chairs that are living by the windows, but more on that in a second.

sofa | side table | coffee table | rug | lamps | media cabinet

One of the reasons that living room layouts are tough is because we make assumptions about the way we live or the things we want and then we’re too nervous to try something else. So it’s hard to unlock a fresh solution if we’re stuck in the same thought patterns. Like for example, it sounds counterintuitive to say getting a smaller sofa can create more seating, but we learned last summer that trying to cram all of our guests onto a sectional wasn’t always the most comfortable or the most conducive to conversation.

So we decided to try to “break up” the seating options a little more. With the chaise gone, we could also tuck a chair into the corner by the TV. So the sofa seats about three adults (the four of us fit on it just fine since the kids are smaller), and there are three other chairs in the room now, too. So even though your brain wants to believe that a sectional = the most seating, it’s not always true.

We’re still on the hunt to find some bigger / more relaxed feeling chairs for the window wall, but these thrifted ones (which you may remember from wayyyyy back in our old home office) are doing the trick for now. I spray painted them and recovered the seats to make them a little more neutral – and I always picture them ending up at the duplex because they have that diamond shape like the diamond windows over there.

Oh and the rug. Let’s talk about that for a second. We recently had a slime incident. Not just a “slime got on the rug” issue, but a “slime sat on the rug for months under the chaise and I only discovered it when we switched the sofa out and it left a huge grease stain that everyone could see thanks to no longer having a chaise” issue. ARGH!

But…. I got it out! After a lot of googling and some tips from people on InstaStories, the winning removal method was pouring white vinegar on the grease spot, letting it sit, scraping it with a spoon (to remove some leftover slime – it was actually “Thinking Putty”) and after it dried I dabbed it with nail polish remover. That was key in lifting the grease stain and you can’t even see where it was! Plus it gives me a new appreciation that this rug has such a variety of gray tones! Those lighter and darker areas make it much more forgiving.

Between that AND getting an immediate chocolate stain on the new sofa (which came right out dabbing it with water – thanks again, performance fabric!) – we feel like this room can take anything that these kids throw at it – both literally and figuratively. I mean… they might prove us wrong, but they’re gonna have to try harder than slime and chocolate…

The last thing I’ll mention while we’re on the topic of updates at the beach house is our dining room chandeliers. A few months ago in our email newsletter, we showed how we swapped out the old capiz chandeliers for these from our lighting line, but I’m not sure we ever shared a picture on the blog. We love that they’re a little more substantial and the polished nickel details tie into the other light fixtures throughout the living room and the kitchen.

capiz chandeliers | benches | chairs | marble vase

The previous chandeliers are now hanging in the master bedrooms at the duplex because it’s basically in the Sherry Petersik Decorating Handbook that every house we fix up must have a capiz fixture somewhere. And you know I love playing musical furniture & light fixtures! (p.s. this is a TV concept, I just don’t want to actually be on tv – but someone please make a series about switching things you already have around like that old show on HGTV called Freestyle and I’d be SO INTO IT! It goes back to my love of staging houses and being scrappy with things you already have on hand).

So there are our latest beach house updates – and I hope it’s comforting to hear that sometimes rooms take a little while to figure out, and it’s totally not a failure to move things around and keep experimenting and trying new things. Even in our very first home I used to rearrange stuff all the time! There truly is no better way to get a quick makeover.

If you want to catch some of our furniture while it’s on flash sale, it’s only on Joss & Main this week (actually, like only 3 more days). And if you want to learn more about the whole furniture designing process, here’s a post we wrote all about that. And for more on our (well, mostly John’s) idea of painting the living room walls a new color, that’s on this week’s podcast. We tried out some trendy online paint companies to see if they really would make picking paint colors easier…

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The post Making A Light & Airy Living Room (That’s Still Livable!) appeared first on Young House Love.

[marysmiller]

How to Use Textiles to Create Mesmerising Wall Art

Textiles make for beautiful and versatile wall hangings, and though they may be seen as traditional or old-fashioned, they definitely deserve a spot in the interiors of today. When it comes to wall hangings, the most popular one and the one that springs to mind immediately is the tapestry. The word tapestry originates from the French “tapisser” – or, “to cover with fabric, to carpet”. The tapestry as we know it today originated circa the 1500’s when they were hung in doorways to prevent cold winds from entering the home. However, you’ll be hard-pressed to find a tapestry being used for that purpose today, for now, we consider them to be exquisite pieces of art that serve no purpose but to delight those who are lucky enough to set their eyes upon it. Though they hail from centuries ago, they are still as stylish today, and need not resemble an antique – depending on the print, you can definitely use a tapestry in a 21st century home!

Features of Wall Hangings

Nowadays, the word “tapestry” envelops a large number of textiles and wall hangings. They can often be used to represent a culture, be an ode to the past or simply bring something funky and unique to a room. A tapestry can be as personal as you want it to be – it can be about your family or something else that you hold dear. Equally, it serves just as well as a simply decorated cloth with the sole purpose of adding another dimension of style to a tired room. You will undoubtedly have come across a lot of different ethnic tapestries if you have been around the world – they can make great souvenirs and can also educate you about the heritage and history of a different nation or culture. They can portray a scene or just house a beautiful myriad of patterns, and of course, their unique textures makes them incredibly snuggly and soft to the touch – so much so you might prefer them as a blanket than as a piece of decorative art!

Of course, you wall hanging doesn’t need to be an off-the-shelf tapestry, you can repurpose a rug, blanket, quilt or pretty much any cloth and hang it on your wall for something new! Wall hangings are particularly adept at adding a rustic and homely feel to a living room. They can be immensely varied in size, texture, colour, pattern and so on, and so it is unlikely you wouldn’t be able to find (or make) one that is perfect for your home, or maybe as a gift for somebody else’s home. Usually, wall hangings are made out of materials such as linen, wool or cotton, but some on the market can incorporate the likes of gold and silver. As you can imagine, you’d have to splash out a little extra cash for more luxurious hangings such as these, but they are perfect for bringing a more sophisticated and regal atmosphere to, say, the living room. If you want a tapestry that will complement the modern vibe of your home, try finding or making one with more abstract designs, or with pops of colour, to break away from the traditional design of tapestries. An eclectic mix of a variety of tapestries can also achieve this “modern” effect. Tapestries can work as a fantastic statement piece or can blend in with or behind a plethora of other features in a room.

Repurposing Materials to Use as Decoration

Textiles are varied in their uses – they can do pretty much whatever your imagination might want them to! Not to mention, they don’t require you to splash out unless you really want to, which is handy when we are trying to be a bit savvier with our cash. And of course, once you are tired of a wall hanging, it is easy to repurpose – maybe something as simple as hanging it upside down could breathe new life into it. Whatever the theme or vibe of your home, there is a tapestry to suit it. If you’re a beginner when it comes to tapestries and is unsure about where to begin, it’s a good idea to go to local thrift stores and antique shops and have a roam around to see if any kind of wall hanging catches your eye. It could also be worth starting at home, by rummaging through rooms and cupboards to see if there is leftover cloth that could be recycled into something gorgeous.

Even things that you may have believed were better off left on the floor, like rugs or carpets, can really shine on a wall if you know what to do with them! A fantastic advantage is their ability to “fill” a room that maybe looks a bit bare or sparse – thereby making it a much warmer and comfortable environment for anyone who inhabits it. There’s minimum fuss with a wall hanging – they are by no means permanent, so if you made the wrong call or simply want to try something new you can have them removed the same day that you change your mind. Tapestries even work in a dorm room due to their flexibility. Wall hangings are also suitable for a bedroom, and if you want to experiment you could use them in place of a conventional headboard! You can match other accessories in your bedroom or living room to the tapestry, or vice versa. Try to stick with a certain theme or colour scheme, as this reduces the risk of your tapestry being a little too overwhelming and consequently becoming a bit of an eyesore!

You could also use samples of materials like wallpaper as wall hangings, which you may even be able to acquire for free! You can’t really get much better than that surely! In the same vein, if you find some wrapping paper that catches your eye then don’t hesitate to at least try it out as a wall hanging, for you may have just hit the jackpot at a minimum cost! Wall hangings can go pretty much anywhere where they fit – next to stairs, above your television – you name it. If you are really bold (and have a little extra time on your hands) you could try a tapestry out on the ceiling! It could certainly add something eye-catching – but only if it works in unison with the rest of the room. When thinking of the colours in your tapestry, go for lighter hues to evoke a more calm and serene atmosphere, or opt for something a little more bright and vivid if you want some “wow factor”. Of course, you can mix up the sizes of your tapestries, maybe choosing a few smaller ones over one large, potentially overwhelming one.

Do-it-Yourself

If you are a renter, you may think that tapestries and other wall hangings won’t be of much use to you, but fortunately, you’d be wrong. Although contractual stipulations do indeed limit the number of alterations you can make to walls in your home, they won’t block off all avenues. Of course, do double-check with your landlord if your renovation is okay by them to avoid any disagreements after changes have been made! Some changes are difficult or impossible to undo and you don’t want to get yourself into a sticky and stressful situation. Hopefully, minor changes like a nail in the wall should be okay, though you may be asked to mend any imperfections in the wall if/when you leave.

You may think that trying to make your own wall hangings is too much of a task for the average person, but there’s not as much to it as you may think – and at the end of the day, it’ll give you something to be proud of. No doubt, after the huffing and puffing what you will have achieved will definitely be worth it! Even a very simple wall decoration like a collection of feathers will be super rewarding, as well as adding that personal touch that is hard to find in a store-bought object. If you have an old carpet or cloth, dust it off and jazz it up, maybe by adding rhinestones or sequins or anything else that can bring a bit of sparkle before it hanging it up. There are a ton of other ways to turn a variety of fabrics into some gorgeous wall décor. You could try transferring the cloth onto a canvas, and then hanging the canvas up if you feel that the cloth on its own does not add enough oomph. It’s not difficult at all, all you need to do is buy a canvas from a local store and then use any method you wish to attach the fabric to the canvas, be that via glueing or stapling. Simple fabrics such as these are a good option because they are very easy and cheap to get a hold of, and most likely you have some lying around the house already.

Once you have found or made your perfect wall hanging, you will then need to mount it onto the wall. One way to do this is using hook and loop tape. Sew some of this tape along the upper length of your hanging. Attach the other side of the tape to a slim piece of wood using staples or a good old hammer and nails, after which it is ready to hang on the wall. Alternatively, you could put your fabric in a frame, for something a little more chic and classy. For this, you’ll need a frame that is similar in measurement to your cloth. If your material is sturdy and flexible, stretch it over a foam board and pin it down with staples or glue, and then frame the whole piece. If your material is not as robust then rather than stretching it, which could possibly damage the fabric, delicately pin it down, and then proceed to frame the board. If you have something more heavy-duty to hang, like a tapestry, it could potentially be nailed straight into the wall – take care not to damage the tapestry nor the wall too much. If your tapestry is more lightly woven, the nails should be able to snuggle in past the thread so that the tapestry itself incurs no damage. You could try push pins for a lighter tapestry that is more firmly woven, but you may need to put holes in it, so think hard before making a decision as it may be irreversible.

You will also find that some tapestries come with their own casing, if this is the case for you then hanging will be even simpler for you. All you need to do is insert a rod into said casing, and then hang it on nails. If you have no rods at hand, they can easily be found at a hardware store or another local store. You can even DIY a casing if your tapestry doesn’t have one! If you are going to sew a casing on, watch a video or do some research about how to sew one on, and remember to make sure it sewed on straight or otherwise your tapestry will be hung on lopsided! If you are adamant about avoiding holes in your tapestry, perhaps because it ruins the look or because the tapestry was very pricey, then you may want to consider using Velcro to hang it up. Make sure your Velcro has enough strength to hold up a heavy tapestry. To begin with, you’ll need to nail a thin piece of wood into the studs in your wall. Put one side of the Velcro on the wood, and the opposite piece on the upper back of the tapestry. Attach the two and that is all, your tapestry is now up and ready to admire.

So there you have it, a few reasons as to why a tapestry could be the perfect addition for your home, as well as some tips to avoid the woes of hanging it up without causing too much damage to the tapestry or the wall! Happy decorating!

  source https://www.otomo.co.uk/blogs/news/how-to-use-textiles-to-create-mesmerising-wall-art source http://otomouk.blogspot.com/2018/02/how-to-use-textiles-to-create.html