#bread and soup kinda lad

[canisalbus]

✦ Bread ✦

[10bugs-in-a-trenchcoat]

Fallout 4 Companions and what I think their fave hangover foods are

Ada and Codsworth: Oil.

Nick: Cigarette

Curie: Buttered Crossiants. How does she have any? Well, she's got plenty of pre-war knowledge, surely SOMEONE in Sanctuary can bake?

Preston: Is that someone. He tries to get away with just coffee on the morning of his hangover, but Sole will insist he eat something, then promptly regrets that when Preston goes through half the bread in Sanctuary having toast.

Cait: She's reaching for that Sailsbury Steak and Potato Crisps. As much as she's a 'tough Irish gal', she knows how bad it is to do NOTHING about a hangover, so she'll munch on that over the morning.

Danse: BOS rations 😭 try as you may post blind Betrayal, he'll just insist "I'm a synth, I don't need food. This is all artifical". You might succeed at making him eat some crackers though. Maybe even a stew if you promise that "Oh I accidentally made too much and it was gonna go to waste anyway so actually you're helping"

Deacon: I'm a firm believer of synth Deacon despite him not dropping a component upon death. And apparently its a lore fact that synths enjoy Fancy Lad Snack Cakes??? So he'd for sure have some of those and a Nuka Cherry.

Hancock: Jet. Ok but seriously, I feel like he'd get Whitechaple Charlie to make him a full English breakfast. Might also have some whiskey because you can't can't hungover if you're always a little drunk :)

Maccready: Probably having the full breakfast as well, courtesy of Hancock. If not for that then he'd probably just have some Yum Yum Devilled Eggs, he seems like that kinda guy to me.

Piper: A bowl of Sugar Bombs and a Nuka Cola. You cannot persuade her into having anything healthy, she just won't. Unless Nat is there, bc she's gotta be a good role model. Then she'll have some soup with tatoes, razorgrain and some mongrel meat.

Strong: The raw meat from the last raider he killed.

Old Longfellow: Fog Crawler meat with Potato Crisps that have been mashed with Brahmin Milk, along with a side of Whiskey. How do you think he lived this long in the wasteland? He's eating good!!

Gage: Nuka Cola. Okay yeah he's having some Nuka but he's also gonna have some grilled Rad-Rat kebabs, maybe even with a dip now that Sole has taught him to eat anything BUT pre-war food straight from the packaging.

[wehavebiggerproblems]

Fallout 4 Random Companion Headcanons

Wrote these a few years ago, too nervous then to share them.

Ada

-Ada was built in 2268. She's about 21 years old.

-Her first memory is of seeing The Mechanist in front of her. Then she watched as The Mechanist removed their head and smiled.

-She's Isabel's first project. 

-Her voice was originally supposed to be more synthesized and robotic, but the more human sound was easier for Isabel to work with.

-Ada prefers to travels in groups with 3-4 people, knowing fully well a robot is a higher target for scavvers.

- Her base body was constructed from many different trial runs of the "ADA" project.

-She's programmed to remain indifferent but the nagging voice in her programming says to do good things in order to to aid other people.

-Ada appreciates the effort Sole goes through to upgrade her body. She doesn't think it's necessary and she's somewhat sentimental about her original form.

-She finds Codsworth's attachment to Sole strange. Almost too human, those Mr. Handy's.

Cait

-Cait loves baths. Bubble baths with bath bombs and even a little rubber ducky. Only Sole knows this.

-The rubber ducky's name is Codsworth. Will not explain why.

-Can fire a rifle over her shoulder behind her. (Annie Oakley style)

-Hates Jazz music. Says it's too slow and calm. Really dislikes it because she's uncomfortable slow dancing with anyone.

-Allergic to feathers. Rad chickens make her sick to be around.

-But once the feathers are removed, the chicken has been cut up, and cooked with some veggies and a loaf of bread, loves it.

-Chicken soup is her favourite dish. Only likes Sole's chicken soup though. Will not eat anyone else’s.

-Shot put would be her favourite sport. Throwing a heavy metal sphere a very long distance is goals.

Codsworth

-Codsworth can speak 8 languages. Including: English, Spanish, French, Japanese, German, Italian, Polish, and Swedish.

-Can recognize almost every written language and translate but lacks the programming to speak every one.

-Nate/Nora got him two years before Shaun was born.

-Sole did minimal repair work on him, and offered to polish him every time he got a dent or scratch.

-He always accepted the polish offer. Very wary of Sole doing factory repairs on him. Would prefer professionals doing the delicate work.

-Always celebrated Nate/Nora and Sole’s respective birthdays. For 200 years.

-When Sole called him "Family", he felt an odd electric pulse through his core processor. He decided to call it a skipped heart beat.

-Calls synth Shaun "Sonny", and "Young Master Shaun".

-Makes Sole's favourite meal when they come back home from Vault 111.

-Will ask to take over if he catches Sole doing chores.

-Hesitates when he has to bring up Sole's spouse knowing it's a touchy subject.

-His favourite friend of Sole's is Nick. Thinks Nick is a good role model for synth Shaun.

Curie

-Curie, like Codsworth can speak 8 languages. However, after becoming a synth, she can only speak about 4.

-Curie loves the feeling of velvet. Collects pieces of velvet clothing. 

-Once wore a velvet cape around because she loved the way it draped over her shoulders and fluttered when she walked.

-Has sensory phases. Music, nice noises, soft materials, different foods, perfumes, etc. Collects whatever makes her senses happy.

-During the "feeling phase" her favourite feeling was holding Sole's hand. Loved running her hand over the surface of water. And velvet.

-Talks out what her feelings are with Piper. Piper explains to her what the "spin spin spin" in her head meant.

-Favourite smell is fresh baked bread. Bakes bread with Mama Murphy every weekend.

-Favourite sweet food is mutfruit pie. Will badger Piper to make it with her.

-Curie's motor functions are still new. Sometimes she misses what she was trying to grab and fumbles.

Danse

-Danse is a horrid mechanic. You'd think spending time in the BoS and dedicating time to auto repair with Ingram. Can't put a toaster together.

-But Power Armor is a piece of cake. Can't do much with pre-war tech, yet fixing power armor is as easy as making breakfast.

-Like all gen 3 synths, he loves Fancy Lad snack cakes. He'd share whatever box he'd find with the squires around the Prydwen.

-Scribe Haylen would volunteer to work alongside Danse on all his scouting missions.

-Danse found out Deacon was the one who stuck the dildo to his power armor. He made sure Deacon's wigs were the same bright purple color the very next day.

-Loves country music. When a traveling courier stops by and shares their western/country music, he actually dances. 

-Has a heart for kids. Even Billy. 

-Leg bouncing habit. Can't bounce his leg in power armor but as soon as he's out, his leg's jittering.

Deacon

-Deacon is in his late 40's. 

-Did not lie about his wife and the University Point Deathclaws.

-Enjoys learning about Pre-war culture, spends free time with ghouls asking them about the past.

-Sole can fool him easily about prewar facts though. 

-Has incredible luck with the pie claw game. Has won 8 times while traveling with Sole.

-Loves making silly bets. "I bet I can skip this plate across the lake at least 1 time." Proceeds to throw the plate at the water horizontally. 

-Doesn't hate Danse. He will pull pranks on him though. Once stuck a dildo on the back of Danse's power armour. 

-His hair grows quickly so he has to shave every day.

-Shaves his head, isn't bald. Shaved head works better with his pompadour wig. 

-Doesn't like mutfruit. Says it's too acidic and hurts his gums.

-Has a rifle-shaped scar on his forearm. Will tell a different story for it every time.

-Once drank a dozen Nuka Cola Quantums on a dare. His pee glowed for a week.

-Tried going vegetarian once. ONCE. Found out being vegetarian means eating no meat or dairy products. Had to have Sole explain that, while gross, radroach could technically be  considered meat.

-Is kinda clumsy. Always bumps into counter edges and stubs his toes on bits of debris.

-Doesn't lie about his family. And when Sole calls him family, promises to never lie about family again.

Gage

-Gage juggled skii balls to entertain the last Overboss, Colter.

-He enjoys small shooting competitions with MacCready, Sole, and X6. All four are sharp shooters.

-Fastest learner. Spent an entire week learning how to cook Sole's old recipes. He can cook them better than anyone with the exception of Codsworth.

-Hums when he works. 

-Had a one night stand with Nisha. Ended so bad, he avoids that area of the park at all costs.

-Hates cats. Had an awful run in with a rad lion. Radiated Mountain Lion that tore a scar deep down his back. 

-Does routine maintenance on the rides in the park. He knows how everything works there. From social hierarchy - to the intricacies of the Vault Tec: Among the Stars ride.

-His favourite flavour of Nuka Cola is Nuka Cola Victory. Rare to find but easily the best.

-Record farthest shot is a bean can from 410 meters. 

-He's a lightweight. Only two beers and he's buzzed enough to sing along with Red-Eye.

-Will tell a different story every time if anyone asks about the eye patch.

Hancock

-Hancock is a history buff. Loves learning about colonial era civilization. 

-Has spent days with Kent Connolly researching Silver Shroud information. He knows more about the Silver Shroud than any other companion.

-Has had a fling with every person in Goodneighbor at least once. Even Kleo. 

-At least in a sexual way, he is extremely open minded. Welcomes new experiences and new information given anywhere anytime.

-Had a decent childhood with his brother. He remembers tending to the mutfruit trees with him and eating every other piece they picked.

-Adores pickles. Would sit and eat an entire jar of pickles just because he loves the cronch so much.

-All time favourite chem is Mentats. Loves making intellectual jokes while high as a kite.

-Does not know what a lot of pre-war expressions mean, but enjoys saying them and hearing them from Sole.

-Is a master at repairing clothing. How else does the frock stay in such good condition? He tends to it every night.

-As far as euphemisms for ghouls go, he likes "beef jerky".

Longfellow

-Longfellow met Hannah while out hunting. She blasted a trapper's head clean off, and he fell harder than the trapper's body.

-He spent his youth training, hoping to become a Brotherhood soldier one day.

-And then he met a vertibird full of them. They called Far Harbor a dump while gathering supplies there. Officially decided to cease all training.

-Managed to take down 17 Mirelurks in 3 minutes. 

-Holds the record in Acadia for alcohol consumption. All records involving alcohol consumption.

-He's really fit? Longfellow could and has bench pressed Sole. 

-He only did so because Hancock and MacCready wouldn't shut up about it.

-Loves singing old shanty songs and dancing with Sole. Only when no one else is around though.

-After the events at Far Harbor, he decides to go sailing along the coast. Wants to see the world more.

MacCready

-MacCready does brush his teeth. He brushes his teeth regularly. He started brushing after he left Little Lamplight. By that point the damage was already done.

-Lucy was the one to convince him to brush his teeth.

-He can't stand the smell of lavender. Lavender candles, lavender lotion, etc...makes him feel  nauseous.

-He named his sniper rifle, "Lucy"

-Won't drink brahmin milk with cereal even to Sole's encouragement.

-Is very well read. Vault 87 had many educational textbooks hidden among the super mutants.

-MacCready was the longest lasting mayor in L.L. He was mayor for 6 years.

-He has no idea what television is and is afraid to ask any pre-wars about it.

-Wary of all ghouls, both feral and normal. He's not bias to non-ferals, but he is a little uncomfortable.

-Had a crush on Lone Wanderer when they first visited L.L. Mac told Joseph and he made fun of him.

Nick

-Nick has an oral fixation. Smokes out of habit and having the familiar feeling of a cigarette between his lips feeds into human nostalgia.

-His right hand is missing skin because he fidgets only his right. Whether it was picking at the fraying plastic or rubbing the fake skin raw.

-He lost the chunk of neck skin after Myrna accused him of working for the Institute. Tore off a chunk to prove he wasn't a perfect person or an infiltrator synth.

-Ellie was the first person in Diamond City to wholly accept Nick as he is. She asked to work with him as soon as he decided to stay.

-Piper and Nick have jam sessions where they have heavy debates about Diamond City law enforcement and criminal misuse of power in the capitalistic society of pre-war USA.

-Met Dogmeat under an overpass. He handed the dog a snack cake and scratched his head. They've been close pals ever since.

-Will "sleep" around Sole. He'll lay down and manually put himself into "sleep mode". Any unnecessary functions will shut down. He lets his thoughts take over. All Sole hears is the faintest fan whir.

Piper

-Piper plans Sole's 211th birthday. She goes all out, collects balloons, bakes several cakes with Codsworth, makes everyone attend and threatens anyone who would act up. "It's Blue's first birthday out here, you WILL behave!"

-Knows how to make mutfruit preserves, mutfruit pie, mutfruit jam and jelly. Makes it for Nat constantly.

-Has a notebook dedicated to little tidbits of info about Sole.

-Nat is exactly 8 years, 5 months, and 25 days younger than Piper. 

-Piper has interviewed every person in Diamond City. Made a game of it with Nat at first, then she just kept going with it.

-Piper has awful shorthand. Almost as bad as Curie's shorthand. Still illegible. 

-Piper's handwriting is so bad, Nat does the writing for the paper. Piper writes the final draft and Nat copies it, and sends it through the printing press.

-Despite bad handwriting, Piper is very eloquent. Can make a super mutant sound like good date idea or convince anyone how the mayor might actually be a synth.

-Her favourite of Sole's friends is Kent Connolly. Would gladly dress up and act out Silver Shroud episodes with him and Sole.

Preston

-Preston has insomnia. Cannot sleep well. Has had insomnia since Quincy. 

-Can sleep well if he's sleeping beside someone.

-Has a box under his bed of little knick-knacks children have given him over the years. Can't bear to get rid of the kid's gifts.

-He actually likes all of Sole's friends. Even Strong.

-Hates coconut. Once found an Almond-Joy while scaving and couldn't finish it to save his life.

-All time favourite candy is Peanut Brittle. Hard to find but gnawing on the hard chunks is somewhat soothing to him.

-Loves back rubs. Giving and receiving but only from close friends or lovers.

-Once accidently drank a bottle of perfume. MacCready told him it was a bottle of fancy expensive wine. 

-Sturges and Preston are the closest of friends, no less maybe more.

Strong

-Strong knows how to jump rope.

-But double dutch is a mystery.

-Before Sole, he only ate meat raw. Sole taught him how to cook it.

-Also lacks patience to cook, but slowly learning.

-Strong was created in Vault 87 after the bombs dropped but remembers nothing from being human.

-Doesn't understand bubblegum. Will always swallow it after a few seconds of chewing.

-Likes having poetry and plays read to him. 

-Sleeps holding Sole or having Sole laying across his stomach. 

-Loves fire. The smell, the feeling of heat against his hardened skin, the taste of charred meat, and watching the embers fly up and turn to ash.

-Strong can read, but chooses not to because super mutants discourage any educational behavior. 

-Likes the sound of clacking keys on a terminal. He'll turn one on and mess around with the keyboard just to hear the different sounds each key makes.

-He can't decide if hand-to-hand combat is better than using guns.

X6-88

-X6 doesn't like using plasma. He thinks the plasma is less accurate. 

-But laser weapons are his jam.

-Spends excessive amount of time augmenting his weapon. 

-If Sole helped, he would be "happy". Would never say it, but a tiny smirk would pop up on his face for half a second.

-Will collect Fancy Lad Snack Cakes. Hoards them in his bedroom in Sanctuary and in the Institute. 

-Sole found his stash and X6 blushed for the first time when they confronted him. 

-He called Sole "Mom" instead of Ma'am once. She won't let him live it down.

-He called Sole "Dad" after hearing Shaun call him "Dad" all day. He won't let him live it down.

-Actually likes kids. Won't show emotions, get down to their level, or speak to kids. But he doesn't hate children. 

-Especially likes synth Shaun. He taught synth Shaun how to use a laser pistol. Shaun found out and put X6 on probation for a month.

Bonus Vault Tec Rep and Kent Connolly under the cut.

Vault Tec Rep

-Rep spent a couple decades learning how to draw. Loves drawing from life. Mostly draws people. Occasionally draws ferals, mutants, and various animals.

-Was engaged before the war, lasted about 2 years before she died of cancer.

-His favorite food was and still is a well grilled medium rare steak.

-A total neat freak. Every space he uses as a homestead has to be thoroughly cleaned of any bacteria, ticks, dust, dirt, radiation residue, etc

-Teased in school for his red hair. "Rusty" was his least favorite nickname.

-He's extremely susceptible to pet names. Doesn't have to be anything sexual or romantic, just pet names. He blushes like a starstruck starlet.

-Loves love. Romance and old-timey corny love stories. He like to woo his partner. Flowers, chocolate, dancing, movie dates, hand written poems, you name it. 

-He misses his old red hair. Years of being a brunette and he's a little bitter about his hair.

-Least favourite part of The Wasteland is amount of bodies he sees on a daily basis. He saw about zero bodies a day on average before the war. Even in Goodneighbor, the average has risen to about 4 bodies a week. 

-Favourite part of The Wasteland is the ability to just go anywhere. After realizing he didn't have any obligation to stay any specific place, he just traveled around for a few decades.

-His father worked for Vault-Tec, and when he graduated high school, he was given a job immediately. 

-Didn't hate it. Didn't love it at first, but he had a real knack for selling.

-He never had an office in Boston HQ. He got the van, and got a sweet bonus for being top salesman, but never his own office. 

-Despite being top salesman, he was only allowed on the first and second floors. He didn't find out till after the bombs dropped that the basement and third floor up had the plans for the various vaults in the area.

-He can't apologize enough to Sole. After thinking on it and checking out vault 111 by himself, he truly feels sorry for what happened.

-Sole gets him a set of steak knives for Christmas. They're homemade by Sole. They tell him he's earned far more than a knife set, but if that's what he's pining for...

-He treasures it so much, he rarely uses them. Just before he leaves for work in the morning, he checks them over and admires them.

-He and Sole have spent days just telling each other pre war stories. He almost knows more about Sole than Piper does. And he's a little proud of that fact.

-He gets along best with, of all people, Deacon. Good sense of humour and always interested in pre-war info.

-Second best is Piper. A nice lady who snoops too much, but does treat everyone with respect and tries to remain unbiased.

Kent Connolly

-Kent was 23 when the bombs dropped.

-He was sleeping in on the Saturday morning when he heard the air raid sirens.

-Hid in his house's basement till the sirens stopped. 

-And then the radiation sickness took over. 

-It took him about 3 months to turn ghoulish. Quicker than most. 

-He dislikes Goodneighbor - the town as a whole. The people are fine, the resources are serviceable, and the safety assured is nice. But he hates how back alley it feels.

-Misses his family the most. They weren't the best, but they made him feel loved and important.

-Speaking of which, Kent had a huge family. I'm talking brothers, sisters, cousins for days, aunts, uncles...he remembers family reunions as huge gatherings chock full of food and kids running amuck.

-Maybe, just maybe, he enjoys seeing Sole all dressed like Shroud a little too much. He's a big fan.

-Once spent 4 grand on a mint condition Issue no. 3 Silver Shroud comic just to find out it was a forgery. Never got that refund. :(

-Writes really well. But only writes Silver Shroud fanfiction. Piper almost convinced him to help write an article about how crime differed before the war and after the war. But he turned her down.

-Nick has agreed to dress up as Shroud if Sole dresses up like Grognak or Mistress of Mystery. But only if Sole dresses up too.

-Irma refers to him as her son. Amari will not say the same, but she also doesn't protest.

-He used to work in comic book shop. (Of course he did.) 

-He writes self insert Silver Shroud fanfiction all the time. After the events at the hospital with Sinjin, the Shroud in his fanfictions suddenly start using Sole's pronouns and is described as physically similar as Sole.

[railroad-migraine]

Lads you have no idea how long I've procrastinated writing my horror literature essay, and yet it's due in a few hours and suddenly I'm so pumped to type 2,000 words, my brain is insane wheeeeeee-

I should be asleep but lol this will be worth the exhaustion in the morning. Plus, I'm seeing a friend who I haven't hung out with in a year so that'll help me vibe through the sleepy Poet mood.

Also I just started randomly looking through my grocery list, and I have coupons/vouchers, and all of a sudden I'm excited to buy vegetables, soda bread and milk tomorrow hell yeeeee mmmmmm.

~ Poet

Not an interesting post, I just kinda like keeping y'all up to date with stuff y'know? :) I have an Ashton fic nearly done, 2/3 Dorian ones omg, cute headcanons as well of course brewing in the back. Cahir mini fics too. And Jaskier stuff. I'm so gosh darn busy wow. I've only got one more essay after horror literature and then I'll post some good soup (content) for y'all x

[scrabbleknight]

Sasha and the Frogs [Ch.18]: Deleted Scenes/Jokes

As you know, chapter 18 was torture for me to write. That also meant I got a bunch of deleted scenes (mostly jokes). They never got into the cut because I couldn't figure out how to fit them in so yeah. Hope you all like it!

<START>

Sasha blinked. “... Wait, no. I feel like I did a bad.” She quietly muttered.

<------------>

“This place is gross. It’s sticky and full of trash. There are no napkins, my soup just killed two flies—”

“Hey! In this family, we don’t complain about free add-ons!” Hop Pop protested.

“—and it smells like something died in here!” She ranted.

<------------->

“You don’t even know what my cooking is, twig.”

Hop Pop gasped. The human girl didn’t realize it but what she just said was one of the foulest insults you can give to a newt. There’s a long history behind that word, starting from the famous Newtopian general Twig the First and his cowardly failure of a grandson Twig the Last. It involved a huge battle and a lot of garlic bread but this was not the time nor place for it.

<------------->

“Well, it is now! We’re gonna fix this place so good that it’ll shine like a star!” Sasha exclaimed, trying to sound encouraging.

If you knew anything about stars, it was that it was extremely bright. But that’s because it’s a giant ball of burning gas, constantly undergoing nuclear fusion to form denser materials. This process would continue for millions of years until it’s become too dense which at that point, the star would either collapse into a mind-boggling space-warping black hole or destroy itself in a catastrophic explosion known as a supernova. Both events would kill everything within its solar system.

In short, stars were pretty from a distance. Real stars, however, were balls of pure stress and anxiety.

<------------->

Sprig gave a thumbs up. “No problem. If you need us to do anything else, just ask.”

“Well, I guess I’ll need a waiter alongside me.”

“Way ahead of you.” The boy frog exclaimed. From his hat, he pulled out a two-piece single-buttoned suit with twin tailcoats, cleanly placed in a garment bag. Peculiarly enough, it did not include pants.

Sasha blinked. “So... You’ve just had that with you the entire time?”

“You betcha! Got it for sale at the market from this old lady. Never worn too!”

That… That sounded sad…

<------------->

Stumpy sighed sadly. “Ay, it seems you’ve discovered my deep dark secret. Let me tell you a tale of how it came to be.”

“Y-you don’t have to. We’re kinda in a hurry at the moment.”

“It all started when I was a wee lad—”

“Alright, just ignore me, I guess.”

<------------->

Outside at the entrance, Polly was really into her role as a bouncer. She had a spray bottle too, specifically designed to shoo the unwanted customers. For example, a certain axolotl.

“Loggle, wear a shirt!” The baby yelled.

“But this is the one time I don’t wear a shirt!” Loggle, who was oddly shirtless, argued. Pulling out her trusty bottle, she proceeded to spray cold misty water on Loggle, driving him away. “Nyeh! NYEH!”

<------------->

“And that’s how we introduced sand into our cooking. The grainy texture adds a lot of depth into ladybug steaks!” Hop Pop explained.

“Oh, newts... So many... Bad ideas...” Albus groaned from his seat, having no willpower left to leave. How long has he been there?

<END>

[foodbytesback]

Panera SOUP-rises Us with New Swimwear Line

Around this time last year, Chipotle shook the fast casual and fast fashion worlds by launching their own line of streetwear.  And now, a whole year later (hey, it takes time to design & manufacture clothes), Panera is striking back.  And those mad lads have accidentally struck gold with their absurd, antithetical fashion choices: summery swimwear adorned with not-so-summery soup themes.  

I hate that I love this so much.  Panera has never, aside from the fact that they have WIFI, tried to be hip with the teens.  It’s one of my grandma’s favorite spots, and it carries itself as such.  And yet, here comes Swim Soups, a move so clearly in line with millennial neo-dadaism that it makes me wonder if Tim & Eric came up with it.  I mean, Panera has had a merch site for a while now, which seems to mostly exist for the sake of their employees buying their uniforms- including name tags:

Ok, maybe Panera is trying to be hip with the teens.  But unlike clumsy Hamilton references that have nothing to do with anything, I believe these swimsuits (uhh, some of them…) will stand the test of time.

So without further ado, let’s dive into the season’s hottest fashions!

[Actually, 2 further ados.  I do just want to point out that I don’t have WIFI at my new apartment yet, so I’m currently writing this while taking advantage of the WIFI at a Panera.  I bought a bowl of French Onion Soup, because we happen to be having a slight break in the 90-degree weather, to celebrate the occasion.  It wasn’t very good.  Also, upon opening all the thumbnail images on their store in a new tab, the file names all followed the format “[item]_please_work”, so shout out to whichever intern seems to have as hard of a time with getting websites to work as I do.]

The Swim SOUP One-piece

Undeniably the flagship of the line.  The iconic(?) Panera shade of olive green.  Big, bold lettering that doesn’t mince its words: S O U P.  The tiny Panera logo by the crotch is pretty much the only thing that gives this away as being a branded product and not a shitpost listing on someone’s Redbubble.  I would have some questions for whomstever I saw wearing this in public, though.  Mostly ones like “why are you so cool.” 10/10

The Mother Bread Swim Trunks

This one’s pretty underwhelming.  Basically it’s the SOUP one-piece but without the only thing that gives it any charm.  It’s an olive green swimsuit, with a little Panera logo on the leg.  Why should I care. If they really wanted to wow us, they would have put SOUP across the ass.  COWARDS. 3/10

The Broc Ched One-piece/Swim Trunks

I’m lumping these 2 together because unlike with the previous 2, it seems to be the same, unaltered pattern applied to the 2 cuts. I gotta hand it to them, if you had told me this was the newest MeUndies print, I wouldn’t have thought twice about it.  It actually took me a while to figure out, but those broccolis are, in fact, covered in cheese, as the name suggests, and that wasn’t just some weird shading style choice.  It’s a cute pattern overall, but I think you’d have to be very passionate about broccoli to actually wear these. 7/10

The Bread Bowl Pool Float

I love the concept.  What better to go with your swim soup than that iconic (ok i need to stop throwing that word around so liberally) bread bowl.  But to be frank, the execution here seems to be a little lacking.  Granted, the only picture available is from the top-down, and from that angle it kinda looks more like an upside-down mushroom cap than a bread bowl. But maybe I’m just jealous, as someone with no access to a private pool, and these kinds of floats always seem to be discouraged at most public swimming venues. Also, it’s one of those ones with a solid bottom, which usually urk me for some reason I can’t quite explain, but I guess is fine here since bread bowls have bottoms.  6/10 

[jzixuans]

ya girl got tagged by @fanartfunart so let’s get this bread

rules:  answer 21 questions and tag 21 people you want to know better (make a separate post)

1. nickname

on here i go by blink, and when i was really little i was Sha bc my friend couldn’t pronounce my full name and then it kinda stuck. i’ve been called lychee before (even tho i’m allergic to lychees, which i find hilarious). my friend calls me slow-ass fuck because she’s always waiting on me. my brother calls me door-jeh because he thinks he’s funny like that

2. zodiac

virgo!! tho if we go by chinese zodiacs, ya girl’s a horse neigh neigh motherfucker

3. height

a solid 5′4″ and if i read the tape measure right, about 5′4.5″

4. last movie i saw

i think it might be next gen on netflix (it’s rlly good btw!)

5. last thing googled

“diy paper lanterns chinese new year” for a lunar new year event my arts council is hosting

6. favourite musicians

,,,,, i don’t think i actually have some?? i mostly just go by whatever song/piece i like so i’ll do those instead

escapism and familiar from steven universe, jalale from coco, song of the sea (lullaby), the entirety of the lightning thief musical

7. songs stuck in my head

la llorona from coco, which doesn’t really help because i don’t know spanish

8. other blogs

so i’ve got this one, @probablyonearth (my main), and @jaylosismyjam from back when i used to be diehard into descendants, tho i haven’t used that blog in 88934 years

9. do i get asks

i’m starting to get some more, yeah! they’re always fun to see when i get the notification

10. followers

434! y’all are great!!

11. following

91, which i feel like isn’t a lot by tumblr standards

12. amount of sleep

ahahahahahahaha,,,,,, like 3 hours a night this week

13. lucky number

i answer just about any question with 7 and/or 12

14. what i’m wearing

my music hoodie from my music program, track pants and socks that i’m probably wearing holes in

15. dream job

writing/editing for a living sounds lit

16. dream trip

hOO boy

hawaii, france, portugal, mexico, spain,,, japan, maybe? i don’t think i’d survive in china lmao

17. favourite food

i friggin love soup, lad. also pho, pad thai, most types of fried rice, and stir fried noodles (lots and lots of carbs lMao)

18. play any instruments

ya girl is a trumpet player!! which can get,,,, v tiring,,,, when you’re in a music program

19. favourite song

oh worm i guess i answered this in the other question but it’s fINe bc i have a lot of music in my library so uhhh

as of right now? i think that money from cabaret is the peak of humour

20. random fact

uhhhhhhhhhhh,,,,, i once cried in the third grade bc i thought that i had to write an essay on nerds as in like, the people type, but turns out the prompt was sposed to be the candy nerds

21. describe yourself as aesthetic things

gold and silver stars against the dark blue night, gold fairy lights taped up on the wall, a bookshelf crammed full of books, piles of notebooks, tangled headphone wires, big glasses and messy blue hair

i’m rlly bad at this

tag 21 people you want to know better

i don’t think i can actually think of 21 people but uhhhhhhhhh

@notveryglittery, @loqicality, @teacupfulofstarshine, @charmingsides, @softestvirgil, @rosesandstuff, ummmm

my brain is short-circuiting rn so i can’t think of anyone else atm so if y’all wanna do it, go for it m8, and if you didn’t want to be tagged but were anyways, that’s valid and i apologize

[forwyk]

Tags Tags Tags

I was tagged by my lil Angle™️️ @dreamingjaemin​ (and little bamboo,, that’s actually the cutest wee thing omw)

Rules: Complete the survey and say who tagged you in the beginning, when you are finished you have to tag people to do this survey. Have fun and enjoy!!!

1) Are you named after someone? Lowkey.  Like my name is Zahra, and it turns out that my Dad has a cousin called Zehra (that’s the Turkish spelling) but when I was being named my Mum didn’t know that so,, lmao I don’t think I explained this v well

2) When is the last time you cried?  Valentine’s Day or maybe Wednesday,, I think.  But I also nearly cried when I was watching My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2 yesterday

3) Do you like your handwriting?  My handwriting tends to vary depending on current levels of pain, but I guess it’s not the worst?

4) What is your favourite lunch to eat? PASTA, SPICY SAUSAGE AND CHEESE

5)  Do you have kids? lmao I am a kid

6)  If you were another person, would you be friends with you?  I doubt it.  I’m quite standoffish to those who don’t know me.  Like, unless a person decides to make a conscious effort to try and get to know me,, we’re most likely not gonna be pals

7)  Do you use sarcasm?  Ye, but not as much as I used to

8)  Do you still have your tonsils?  Nope

9)  Would you bungee jump?  Maybe at some point?  Idk, I’m a small lad so I’m kinda scared I’d be bouncin’ about all over the place

10)  What is your favourite kind of cereal?  I tend to go through cereal phases, but rn I’m proper lovin’ coco rocks.  But like, I also love a good rice crispee hehe

11)  Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?  Sometimes, depends on my mood and the shoes I’m wearing lmao

12)  Do you think you’re a strong person?  Kinda,, like, idk how to say this without it looking like I’m being cocky, but usually if I’m going through a tough time I can get myself sorted.  I’ve had a lot of hospital and medical stuff and I’ve gotten through that and I like to think it’s made me stronger?  It really depends on what type of strong we’re talking about here.  Emotionally, kinda,, I like to think so, but physically, nah m8910 that’s not happening lmaoooo

13)  What is your favourite ice cream flavour?  CHOCOLATE FUDGE BROWNIE

14)  What is the first thing you notice about people?  It usually depends on the person.  Like, I guess I tend to notice what they’re wearing the most?  But I also tend to notice the way the act and carry themselves.  If it’s a lad I find to be 💯💯💯, then their lips hehehe 🙈

15)  Red or pink?  Red

16)  What is the least favourite physical thing you like about yourself?  Probably my chin.  It isn’t as developed as the rest of my face bc arthritis decided to restrict it’s growth ffs.  I’m also not too fond of my nose and hands??  But I’m coming to terms with them!!!

17)  What colour pants and shoes are you wearing now?  Black jeans and black converse

18)  What was the last thing you ate?  Eggs, sujuk and bread

19)  What are you listening to right now?  Korkma Kalbim - Serdar Ortaç

20)  If you were a crayon, what colour would you be?  Purple maybe?  I was once sent a thing relating to what colours people saw you as and the person picked out mainly purple/lilac colours I think

21)  Favourite smell?  Oaky, I’ve got a few so get ready.  I absolutely love rose jam, it’s like my top favourite smell, but I also love the smell of the Yoga Bomb bathbomb from Lush, which I think primarily has sandalwood in it.  Then I ialso love the smell of Daisy Eau So Fresh by Marc Jacobs, and, this one’s a bit more personal I guess, but I really like the smell of suncream mixed with seasalt?  It reminds me of being in Turkey hehehe 🙈

22)  Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone?  My mum

23)  Favourite sport to watch?  lmao

24)  Hair colour?  Brown

25)  Eye colour?  Brown

26)  Do you wear contacts?  Nah, I just stick w my glasses

27)  Favourite food to eat?  Oaky, so I prefer savoury things so even the desserts I like are kinda savoury.  My favourite UK thing would be this wee microwavable meal you can buy and it’s spaghetti, cheesy sauce and bacon bits.  But my favourite Turkish foods, right, oaky, let’s go.  I absolutely love dolma,  börek, acma, meatball soup, spinach cake, lokma and baklava those are all the ones I can think of rn lmao

28)  Scary movies or comedy?  Comedy

29)  Last move you watched?  Never Been Kissed (1999) the sad reality lmao

30)  What colour of shirt are you wearing?  Black and white stripy!!!

31)  Summer or winter?  Summer, I can’t cope in the cold lmao

32)  Hugs or kisses?  I’ve only ever been hugged, but I can imagine liking both lots hehe 🙈

33)  What book are you currently reading?  Nothing 😪 School is taking up too much time

34)  Who do you miss right now?  Too many people

35)  What is on your mouse pad?  Em,, I don’t use/have one

36)  What is the last TV programme you watched?  Riverdale and then the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

37)  What is the best sound?  BamBam’s voice and his laughter💕💕💕

38)  Rolling Stone or the Beatles?  I’m not really a fan of either,,,

39)  What is the furthest you have ever travelled?  The UK to Turkey

40)  Do you have a special talent?  Doubt it tbh lmao

41)  Where were you born?  The UK

42)  People you expect to participate in this (although it’s completely optional)? @taeyongfireeyes, @jeonesque, @imxjaebeom, @spicypancakedoyoung, @chimchim0726, @captain-alec, @ikemenyuta, @markleesgiggle, @angel-spices, @strawbaimee, @kathryine, @oh-sehunnie-94 and @bowtrckle

[nerdyfoodandbeercollector-blog]

Beer Snob, what’s in a name?

If you haven’t noticed yet, I kinda have a thing for beer. Don’t worry, it isn’t like I make it obvious or anything (look at the signs: this is a beer and food blog. I am often wearing brewery swag or a flannel shirt, the quintessential beer employee uniform. I send you a lot of pictures and snaps of beer. Did I mention this is a beer and food blog?). Even though I am (not) quiet about it, it is something I have become passionate about. I pride myself in being a true beer snob. 

But what does that mean? I don’t try and push super heavy beer down your throat. I don’t go around knocking red solo cups of piss water out of your hand. I don’t openly bash people’s choices when they order, and I don’t go around correcting your pronunciation of “brettanomyces” (it is pronounced BRETT-an-Oh– you know what, just call it Brett). Well, I guess it means, for me at least, that I tend to like a lot of different styles and I like to appreciate and enjoy all sorts of different flavors. It means that I care about the “craft” of brewing and not just its finished product. It means that I think beer can be a great unify-er, bringing people from all walks of life together. It means that I care about the amount of work, sweat, tears, and (sometimes) blood that goes into making even a small batch of beer. It means I try to deconstruct the flavors that make a beer and appreciate each one as well as the whole. It means I am passionate about good tasting beer.

From as far back as I can remember, my family has enjoyed drinking socially. My parents like wine, they like beer, they even enjoy the once-and-awhile nightcap. My dad would get excited about sharing a new bottle of red he discovered from his local shop (and since all dads are the first hipsters, I am sure it was a bottle you’d never heard of before). My step-dad, who is Dutch, loved and still loves his Belgian beers. My grandparents enjoyed their light, American piss-water (Bud was always the preferred can). And so, there was alcohol at almost every family dinner party my mom would throw and at most family dinners. But the goal was never to get drunk or to pass out. There was never a risk of someone needing a cab to get home. I believe that this instilled in me the idea that you can drink alcohol because you enjoy the way it tastes and because you want to highlight the flavors of a meal or to share a new bottle of something with friends and family. I learned that there were more important aspects of the beverage than just the alcoholic content (note, that still doesn’t stop me from looking at the ABV column on most menus first to get the best bang for my buck). And this isn’t to say I didn’t ever get drunk (of course I have) or that I wasn’t ever irresponsible (oh boy, this one trip to Russia…), it just means that from my parents, I learned how to truly appreciate beer. And I am grateful for that. 

Early on in college, I learned that the beer of choice often came in a 24 or 30 pack for $16.99 (think Coors, Bud, Miller, McGolden, and even the ever-elusive Beer 30) and the sole purpose of this beer was to drink a lot of it fast in the hope of getting you drunk, or at the very least, tipsy. While I liked getting tipsy, I needed to drink A LOT of that sparkling water-like beer to even come close. And I couldn’t taste any of the ingredients, so what was the point? I decided that I wanted, and would eventually come to love, beer that actually tastes good. Imagine that! Ingredients picked to play off each other and balance each other; beer crafted, not just as a cog in some big company’s machine. There’s something about drinking a delicious, layered, well-designed beer and enjoying it for what it is instead of looking for 30 tasteless beers to drink fast enough to get tanked before your sister’s recital (don’t ask).  And so if I was going to drink my bread instead of eating it, then I decided early on that I was going to get picky enough to make sure I chose the calories I actually wanted. And I never looked back.

But while my level of interest in beer only increased as I became more passionate about supporting local breweries, I never got the itch to brew my own beer. Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing more rewarding than trying a beer you made in your mom’s shitty soup pot and actually thinking, “hey, this isn’t half bad!” And it can be pretty cost effective if you get into it enough to brew beer regularly. And, I am told, after a few times, you get the process and rhythm down that you can be brewing every few weeks as if it is second nature. So why haven’t I truly taken the plunge?  There’s just so much cleaning involved! The slightest bit of dust or bacteria could ruin hours of work, and I just can’t handle that kind of pressure, I guess. Having helped a few friends and then brewed a beer myself a couple of times, I have an increasing amount of respect and admiration for brewers, both professional, master brewers and the novice home brewer.

Recently, I was lucky enough to design and help brew my own beer at Sisyphus Brewing. And so, the “Orange You Glad You Like Chocolate” stout was born. But it was during this experience that I got to see what it was like to be a brewer for a day.

“It’s a lot of waiting around,” says Nick Walby, the new head brewer over at Sisyphus.  “Some days, most of what I do is just sit and wait.” Indeed, after grinding the malts and adding them to the mash, and then starting the boil, most of our time was spent sitting and talking about soccer (he’s an Arsenal fan, I’m a Liverpool lad). Sure, we were able to check out some of the other beers sitting in fermenters or bright tanks, and we cleaned as much as we could, but that was pretty much it. So not only do brewers have to practice and test making new recipes from scratch or be meticulous about how they want to transfer the fermented beer into a bright tank, but they have to find a way to keep themselves occupied while they wait for their concoction to finish boiling. Of course, that comes with its own set of tasks, too. “We have to make sure to add the hops at certain periods during the boil. That’s how we can determine things like bitterness and hop flavor.” This might seem so basic, so straightforward to some, but during my time as a Brand Ambassador, I learned that a lot of people don’t know what exactly goes into making a beer. And even with me, someone that knows the process very well, it was a completely different experience to do it first hand at an actual brewery instead of in a friend’s garage. Here, I got to really see the impact that adding each ingredient at each stage has on the final product. I suppose, then, it makes sense that brewers just gotta keep practicing and experimenting with different flavors and ingredients until they come out with the product they envisioned. And since brewing takes all day and fermenting takes weeks, you can see that you need to have patience. “Patience might be the most important ingredient, and not everyone has that. And what makes it even harder is that sometimes you have to keep thinking about 10 different things at the same time to keep track for the rest of your day.”  So while the work day is broken up by a lot of downtime, you’re never truly not working. “It can be a grind.” I’ll say. At least when you homebrew, you have your own home to keep occupied. “It can get a little lonely, I suppose, but that’s part of the job sometimes. Plus there’s always something I’m sure I could be doing.”

I guess it takes a particular person and a lot of practice. While I enjoyed my experience immensely and it helps me appreciate the beers I drink and the breweries I visit all the more, I feel like, at this stage in my life, I’m all about drinking it, writing about it, and talking about it than I am about brewing it myself. I’ll keep my beer snob hat until the day I die.