#bsd fandom fucking needs to step up

[vitasexualiiis]

when you ship something and it has like NO porn 🤮🤢🤮🤮🤮

[starstruckkittensweets]

puppy love

Chuuya Nakahara x Reader

fandom: bungo stray dogs

My latest fixation, Chuuya with puppies! My precious boy deserves to be happy with a doggy of his own, so I decided to play into this little fantasy of mine (and his, probably). I'm planning on writing more parts to this lil series, I think it's helping me get out of my writing slump. Also parts of this fic are inspired by Shiloh, one of my all-time favorite books (so much nostalgia...) and a bit of a reference to that one puppy episode from Wan. And the panel I used for the banner is from the BSD manga (I think it's ch. 24) I hope you enjoy!

warnings: mentions of stray animals, Reader cries but it's in relief, mostly fluff, pet names (mostly "doll" but used only once in this part), the start of a slow burn perhaps? || words: 2k

Part I | Part II | Part III

He’s halfway through his usual trek home, muscles burning and head pounding from another successful night’s mission, when he realizes he has a shadow.

Chuuya doesn’t let up his pace; stay calm, don’t give anything away—but he has to wonder, who could be this stupid to try to follow a mafia executive? And they’re not being subtle about it either. Making no effort to conceal their breaths or their footsteps—

Wait a minute…that sounds too light to be footsteps…

He sucks in a breath and turns around to face the culprit. Hands clenched into fists at his sides, preparing for a fight—

“Woof!”

Staring up at him is perhaps one of the cutest fucking dogs he’s ever laid eyes on. (Not that he’s seen many dogs, but the point still stands.) Pointy ears, fuzzy orange fur, white paws and a belly that definitely looks too plump for a street dog.

He stares at it. The dog stares back, pink tongue lolling out the side of its mouth.

“…Woof!”

It takes every ounce of strength he can muster not to melt right then and there on the sidewalk. A thousand squeals on the tip of his tongue, gloved hands itching to scratch under that fuzzy little chin of his.

Never mind any dog hair, fuck that. Who’s gonna try to turn their nose up at this little cutie?

Chuuya briefly scans the area—not a soul in sight, just him and his companion beneath the lamplights—before dropping to his knees. The dog paws at the ground, his curly tail swishing madly in the air.

“C’mere boy,” he keeps his voice soft, holding out a hand. But the dog doesn’t budge. He just stares at him with that big dumb smile of his.

That really adorable dumb smile.

He tries again. The dog tilts his head and refuses to move. So Chuuya tries another tactic: “C’mere, girl?”

Still doesn’t move a muscle. Although now the dog looks amused as he paces from side to side, just out of Chuuya’s reach.

Yeah, gotta be a boy with that kind of attitude.

Chuuya sighs before pushing himself off the ground. Ah well, guess he’s too nervous to approach humans. Can’t really blame him for that; this city’s got its fair share of unpleasant people. He deals with them all the time, so he can kinda relate.

He shoves his hands back into his pockets (try not to think about how soft the dog’s fur must be) and turns on his heel to head home. It’s getting late anyway, and he’s got to get an early start tomorrow morning. He can’t be spending all night moping around some stray puppy following him around.

Even if he is the cutest thing he’s ever laid eyes on.

But he only gets a few steps in before hearing the unmistakable click-click of the dog’s nails against the pavement. He stops, the dog stops too. He glances over his shoulder, biting back a smile at the dog’s happy face.

“What do you want, huh? I don’t have any food, so if that’s what you’re looking for…”

Not that he looks like he needs any treats to begin with. He’s seen a few of the dogs roaming around Yokohama, all skin and bones as they pick through tipped-over trash cans. And the stray cats are no better, ears flat against their skulls as they hiss and claw at everything in sight.

So why does this dog look so fucking proud of himself?

Chuuya sighs and whistles to himself—and suddenly the dog comes running.

Two dirty paws plant themselves on his dress pants, that’ll surely be hard to get out, but how can he get angry when the dog’s trying so hard to reach his face? He chuckles under his breath as he kneels down to his level, as the dog plants kiss after kiss on his face with his slobbery tongue.

“Who knew all it took was a whistle?” he says more to himself than to the pup. The dog’s tail is wagging so hard he thinks it’ll fall off, the tiny little thing that it is.

He slides one of his gloves off, letting the dog sniff his hand before scratching him behind the ears. He was right, his fur is so soft… And his smile only gets bigger when the dog licks him again, not even minding all the drool.

But then he stiffens, slipping his fingers through the dog’s fur, noticing a red band of leather fastened around his neck. A collar? No way he’s someone’s pet. Then again, he does look a little too spoiled to be wandering the streets for food.

He curls his finger around the golden tag dangling from the buckle. No name, only an address he thinks he recognizes. Right on the edge of Yokohama, where the scent of sea salt is the strongest. Is it someone’s house? Apartment? Maybe a  shelter of some kind?

Chuuya steals another look at the dog, at those sweet brown eyes and twitching wet nose, trying his best to ignore the icy clench of his stomach. Maybe it’s for the best, just to bring him back. What’s he gonna do with a dog, anyway? Not like his job allows for much time raising a puppy, anyway.

Even one so cute as this little guy.

“Alright,” he sighs, scooping the pup in his arms, “let’s get you home.” He tries not to dwell on how warm the puppy is, or how softly he nestles his face in the crook of his shoulder.

And definitely not the way he can feel the pup drifting off to sleep as he starts down the sidewalk in the opposite direction. Gentle puffs against his skin, his curly tail twitching against his wrist.

“Kotaro! There you are!”

The engraving on the pup’s collar has led him to a tiny little shop a few minutes from the port. A bit shabby with a torn sign on the top and windows that have definitely seen better days, and he’s about to turn tail (no pun intended) until he sees someone nearly fly out through the set of double doors.

“Kotaro!” Your voice is strained, tears streaming down your cheeks as you sweep the puppy into your arms. Clutching him as tight as you can, smoothing down the fur on his head as he stirs awake from his little nap. “I was worried sick… How did you escape again?! I could’ve sworn I locked the doors… You’re just lucky I came back downstairs when I did—or else you would’ve been out there all night long!”

The puppy only wags his tail, staring up at you with those silly eyes and sweet little “smile.” He knows it’s your weakness, how could you be angry at a face like that?

Oh, well. As long as he’s safe, you can’t really hold a grudge against him. Not when he’s back in your arms, safe and sound, and it’s just the two of you, just as it always should be.

It’s only when you hear someone clear their throat that you realize you’re actually not alone. You hastily wipe your eyes with the back of your hand—it’s a little difficult with a nearly-twenty-pound dog in your arms—and stare up at the man before you. Kotaro’s savior, your savior. And suddenly you feel a fresh wave of tears surge forth.

“Thank you for bringing him back! I’m so sorry if he’s caused you any trouble, I know he has a habit of bothering people when he sneaks out—I thought I’d kept him inside this time! He just has a thing for running away like the little troublemaker he is. He’s still young, hopefully he’ll grow out of it when he’s older, maybe he’ll mellow out and settle down, and then…”

You bite your tongue and avert your eyes. No need to scare off the stranger with your incessant rambling, especially after he was so nice to bring Kotaro back to you. But he only shakes his head, a soft smile on his lips as he tips his hat over his eyes.

“Don’t worry about it, he didn’t cause too much trouble.” He lifts a hand, allowing Kotaro to sniff him before scratching the fur beneath his chin. “Keep an eye on him, though. You don’t want him getting lost out there, especially this time of night.”

“I know… I swear, he’s gonna give me gray hairs before the end of the year. The other dogs aren’t even this mischievous, I don’t know where he got it from!”

Wait, other dogs?

He glances over your shoulder, towards the dingy windows of the shop. Pet supplies and part-time shelter, the sign plastered on the glass says. And sure enough, the closer he looks at your outfit, he can see little bits of dog fur clinging to the fabric—some gray, some brown, some white, and then a hint of orange thanks to Kotaro.

Just how many dogs do you have in there?

“Anyway, I just wanna say I really appreciate you bringing him back here. You didn’t have to, I know you’re probably busy. Let me just run inside and get my wallet, I think I have some left over if you want—”

But he’s quick to shut you down with a shake of his head, even a wave of his hands for emphasis. No money, he’s already got plenty of that to spare. And besides, it doesn’t sit right with him, paying him for something that should come naturally to any decent person.

And he doesn’t want to sound mean, but judging from the shape of that little shop of yours, you look like you can use every last cent you have.

“Oh, if you say so… But still, why don’t I make it up to you sometime?”

An uneasy silence settles in the air between you; Chuuya blinks as he watches you shift your weight, partially hiding your face in Kotaro’s fur.

“…I mean, you don’t have to—I just wanna pay you back some way! Maybe I can treat you to lunch one of these days? I don’t have many days off, but I can make it work! Or maybe…do you have a dog of your own? I can give you a discount on anything in the shop!” You throw an arm out to the double doors behind you, still holding Kotaro to your chest. “Name it and it’s yours! I really don’t mind, it’s just me here anyway. Well, me and the dogs, all nine of us.”

Wait, nine, including yourself…

“You have eight of them?!”

A laugh bubbles up in your throat at the look on Chuuya’s face. He reminds you of a child on Christmas morning, staring at the presents strewn around the glowing tree. He doesn’t seem one to enjoy the company of dogs, given his fancy attire and confident aura.

And yet, he still brought Kotaro back home, when he could’ve easily turned and walked the other way. You’ve learned not to judge a book by its cover, after all.

“Eight dogs, and hopefully more by the end of the year.” Your cheeks grow warm beneath his startling blue gaze. (His eyes are really pretty up close, aren’t they?) “…I can tell you all about them on our lunch date, if you’re interested.”

He blinks, eyes flitting back and forth between you and the dog in your arms. You’ve got guts, he’ll give you that; he can see it in the way you talk to him, the way you hold the puppy in your arms. Gentle as ever, but a fire brimming in your eyes. You love this dog, no doubt about it.

And you’ve got seven more inside? Do you love them all the same amount?

What breeds are they? How did you come to adopt so many dogs at once? Or did you adopt them at once, or sporadically over the years?

So many questions, and yet the night is crawling by. He shakes his head again, giving Kotaro one last scratch behind the ears, before meeting your gaze once more.

“Lunch sounds perfect, doll.”

Your lips pull up in a smile, and he can’t help but notice how it nearly matches the one on Kotaro’s face. Bright and eager, melting under the attention of the ones around you.

And yet your smile is infinitely prettier, and he finds himself thinking about it as he starts the familiar journey back home, as the night hours slowly tick by.

[iloveyanderes]

What I think of every bsd character (some of them I don't know so I'll be making wild guesses about them) also I got all these names off a wiki and sometimes there not exactly spelt right.

Fukuzawa: nice cat loving man who I respect

Yasano: best doctor in the world, would not recommend though

Atsushi: my cute little tiger boy🥺💕

Tanizaki:I kinda like to pretend he doesn't have a sister

Kunikida: dazais number one target

Kenji: adorable, would protect with my life

Kyouka: don't dislike I just don't really feel her

Dazai: suicidal maniac, best singer ever

Ranpo: I love him, smart but dumb, I would give him all of my food.

Katai: I have no idea who he is but he looks like he never leaves his bed

Naomi: I like to pretend she doesn't have a brother

Kirako: she looks nice

Mori: I fucking hate him, no pedophiles allowed near anyone

Elise: girlboss, someone get her the fuck away from Mori.

Ace: looks flashy

Chuuya: love him, small boy with nice hair and the best hat in existence

Rando: looks very random

Koyo: idk man, she looks powerful

Paul: where chuuya got his style

Akutagawa: in need of dazai approval

Higuchi: was annoying at first but she grew on me

Albatross: looks like he's constantly in a disco party

Doc: bad haircut supreme

Iceman: looks like a fireman

Lippmann: invests in great lips

Piano man: is great at playing the piano and knows it

Ryuro: this guy will die of lung cancer

Gin: is okay

Tachihara: I know who you really are

Karma: I know nothing about him except that Fyodor got to him

Yumeno: I'll stay on their good side

Kajii: I know he likes bombs and lemons

Oda: love him, fellow ginger, love his ability, without him this story would have never really began or at least Atsushi wouldn't be the Mc.

Ango: uhhhhhhhhh, cool I guess don't really like him

Scott Fitzgerald: the entire guild is probably his sugar baby

Poe: love Karl, fellow introvert, probably gets billions of dollars from writing x reader fanfics, I'd pay him any amount

Lovecraft: the only author I actually knew about before reading this book

John steinback: kinda looks like he could be kenjis distant cousin

Lucy: like her just not really attracted to her character

Margaret: I know nothing about this character but I despite the way her name is written, I prefer margrett it sounds more like it

Mark Twain: twains out of bad situations

Nathaniel: is more likeable because his name is closest to my fav boy name Nathan.

Fyodor: somehow I have a completely neutral opinion of him, I don't like or dislike him.

Nikolai: this may be bias but I absolutely adore white haired characters that have braids, there my type of people and I automatically like them, bonus points if there unhinged

Sigma: bro is the official Y/N I feel bad for him, the absolute shit he went through, also he has the best and most realistic facial expressions in all of bsd

Bram: I like him, I seriously hope him and that small red head gets a brother/sister relationship.

Oguri: studio bones got to him

Agatha: her name is like one step away from being majestic

Fukichi: bro is the reason why Kenji and Atsushi got hurt alot, not to mention he's planning world wide terrorism, and it was all because he got rejected by his childhood crush(this is totally what happened)

Teruko:my fav bsd character, love her absolute girlboss, pls I beg of you let me be your bestie, I will sell my soul

Jouno: pretty good, I love that he put others above his own self pleasures, also kinda terrifying in some manga panels and In others hes so cute

Tecchou: cute little boy, love him, also I ship him with jouno, it's mandatory if you enter this fandom, will probably end up being bestie with kenji

Aya: biggest girlboss in this entire series, hate her dad, she is best girl, if you dis her I will track you down and find you.

This is all the characters I got a the enger for, hope you enjoyed

[herwritingartcowboy]

Ok BSD ango with a Latina reader

She would help him not overwork himself.

Like maybe how you meet and love at first sight

Soulmate au

Fluff plz

A/n: This is my first time writing a Latina Reader so please no hate. And here people will know each other's soulmates through a red string.

Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs

Character(s): Ango Sakaguchi

Warning(s): Fluff-Smut, Breeding, Size kink

Readers Gender: Latina Reader

You were new to this apartment and this place in general and that's why you were walking so fast

Classically you bumped into each other as while you were going to get a coffee and he was off to work

You took notice of him right away as you thought he was really cute, he helped you up and both of you apologized and awkwardly walked away

Since then you both would cross each other and it got to the point where you started to greet each other only for it to turn into full conversations

You have heard the stories of the red and how it will appear once you're near your soulmate and for awhile you have felt your pinky finger hurt, first thing you probably pulled on it till the next morning when you both started talking you can see a red string form only to lead to who you have learned to be Ango Sakaguchi

You guys would start to go on early coffee dates and at night catch up at the park

You both took small steps into your relationship but soon you both moved into together

Now you don't know much about what or where he works but you know it causes him to be up late and it would hurt you to not see your man take care of himself so at night once it hits 10:30 you would go over and drag him into bed, it did start fights but he soon learned you did this because you truly did love you, and in the morning you had made him a traditional latino dish (which he loved by the way) seeing you do this for him really made him believe that the red string was right and that you are his soul mate

This man wants to learn about your culture and where you come from and even wanting to learn the language for you as he loved the way you talked to him

You were happy to teach someone about your culture and it did take awhile but one day as you got home from work Ango had made some dinner but what caught off guard was what he called you, "Cariño" "Tesoro?"

You two did end up getting married after seven years of dating which he proposed to you the same date and time and place you both bumped into each other

The wedding was beautiful but small but it had a lot of food, drinks, music was playing, relatives were there, and the wedding went late into the night which left the both of you tired

I don't know if you are to have but I think if you do the max will probably be three, two boys one girl

Your relationship will have ups and downs, having both of you live on the line, learning about his work, and many more but I'm certain you two will push through it

Smut From Here

Now you do talk dirty to him in spanish without him knowing so imagine the blush he gets on his face when he realizes what you have been telling him

I feel like you are the reason why kinks made its way into the bedroom as you both would discuss um and would do those the same night

Breeding Kink,he likes to have you in the missionary position as in this way he can see your face when you cum but on this certain night as you clawed at his back you begged him to cum deep inside you to the point where you will be pregnant with twins, let's just say he didn't pull out that night

Size kink, you were kind of surprised seeing his size on the first night you both did it as that same night it took you awhile to adjust to his size which he did take pride in and to this day you have to take a minute to adjust

Bonus, he is fucking while he is busy doing paperwork like you can cum and sit on his lap but you would need help walking afterwards

[alexbutrandomthoughts]

Can I ask your top 10 fav fics ever (from any fandom, if you don't mind)?

Also, just curious, is there a story behind your name "alexbutrandomthoughts "?

"I was screaming your name through the radio" by ElectricSplatter a must-read for all soukoku fans, this shit is so good i reread it 20 times at least.

It's basically bsd retelling but they're all singers and it's focused on soukoku. Honestly writing is immaculate and i like the way it was told, format wise, like how we jump back in forth from present to past, and overall it has everything you could want from a story. I have this one saved on my phone and i reread my favorite chapters from time to time

"Time Speaks" by SmallMoon333 do not get fooled by that unassuming title, this fic made me physically incapable of reading any other Lawlight fic, bc this one is just too good. It's akin to trying a high quality steak and unable to eat any other meat anymore bc you know how heaven tastes (i obviously read other fics, they're pretty good too, but this one is just my personal favorite especially the characterization is so fucking good it's crazy)

"Electric touch" by bejeweledhaze okay so you know the feeling when you need something very specific, you go to store, and the stars align perfectly so you find that thing, just what you need it, almost feels like custom made. That's this fic.

So when Kaveh fans died (myself included) after that one official art with Kaveh as a mechanic, i just needed to fill the whole in my chest, after saving every single Mechanic Kaveh fanart known to men. I decided check out the tag, but i didn't really expect much, i mean it's been like what? Couple days since the official art was dropped. Sure there is probably couple of fics but not something i would like, right? Bejeweledhaze said "lemme cook" and turns out they were Gordon Ramsey in disguise. One chapter, 33k words of pure and unfiltered masterpiece.

"School watches Assassination Classroom" by TheSteinsGateFormula so I'm a sucker characters react to their show fics. What of it.

Yeah there are not many reaction fics that i like cuz personal preferences. But THISSSSSSSSSSSS ugh so good. And very much in character and i loved from start to finish.

"MSBY4's Lockdown Survival Guide" by mintberries

Okay so this was just good vibes. Social media aus fics for me is what Isekai is for Gigguk (but I'm also isekai trash person, their just fun) and this is ALSO a covid19 au???? With my favorite team????? This appeased my sakuatsu craving soul and it was just dumbasses having fun.

"Duo Heroes, Double Black" by Yellow_Canna

It's bsd&mha crossover and it's beast!soukoku isekai/sorta reincarnation/technically regression do i need to say more

"No Water Is Enough" by Boomchick

Hualian angst, my favorite type of angst. It's sorta memory loss and i knew the suffering would be glorious once Hua Cheng remembered and it did not disappoint

"Pick-Up and Chase" by SKayLanphear was laughing my ass off with this fic. Marinette just constantly flirting with Adrien as herself and as Ladybug was a wild and hilarious ride

"one step at a time" by OuterWilde (foreverraugust)

Honestly, this was just good old slice of life and overall nice fic. I was obsessed with Ace Attorney at the time, and well with all the crazy shit that was happening in the games, this was a nice break from it.

"A Century Between Us" by Dulllull dead ass my favorite jjk fic. It's not finished, not by a long shot but it's so GOOOOD SHIT SLAPS SO HARD and well it's reincarnation fic how can i not love it and written so WELLLLL PLEASE READ THIS IT'S VERY AAAAAAAAAAA-

As for my name, originally i migrated from Twitter cuz fuck Elon, and had another blog which had my name and this was a side blog for me to scream about my hyperfixations, whichever i would have at the time and i ended up using this one more lol. Hence the "random thoughts"

[eyes-of-mischief]

weekly fic recs | 25

fandoms: bnha, bsd, dc, knb

bnha

area cryptid upset no one bothered to inform him of his tragic backstory by crimsonseekers

“My life is a nightmare,” Dabi muttered blankly. “Nah, this is hilarious,” Hawks said, and while he wasn’t explicitly laughing, Dabi knew that those weird little chirps he was letting out were pointed at him. “Imagine if we go through all this effort and you don’t even have some sort of dramatic background or tragic backstory to justify you being this emo, you’re just a hot topic junkie or something.” “That’s fucking worse.”

Or,

Dabi has amnesia and keeps reading conspiracy theories about himself in an attempt to figure out who he is, gets the League in on it, and they dismantle organized crime, revolutionize society, and ravage the hero system in the process. Hawks suffers.

repeat by beeclaws

Work. Check the cameras. Keep them alive.

Aizawa keeps his head above water.

Part 3 of rescue

Riddles in the Heart by PitViperOfDoom

The law is clear: whoever correctly answers three riddles will marry the prince, while all who fail are to be executed. The people live in fear as more challengers try and fail, and the throne grows bloodier with every passing year. But a young prince, nameless and in exile from his home, believes there may be more to this brutal challenge than meets the eye.

Of course, there's only one way to find out: ring the gong, and take the trial.

bsd

Day by Day by bloodsvgarr

(explicit)

When Chuuya wakes up in an unfamiliar room, with an unfamiliar man who offers to make him breakfast, he will have to figure out just how he got here, and why. Nothing is as easy or as simple as it seems, and nothing makes sense. There's far too much that he doesn't remember, and everything's confusing. So what will he do when he realizes that the unfamiliar man is actually someone very close to him? What will he do when he realizes he is no longer able to recognize his own home?

Murder Mystery Matchmaking by dgalerab

(mature)

When Ranpo is ‘kidnapped’ by Poe and given the opportunity to meet his friends and solve a case, he isn’t expecting every single one of them to be a better match for Poe than Ranpo is. He certainly isn’t expecting Poe’s friends to be as invested in their rivalry as Ranpo is. And there’s no way he could have ever expected the peacock.

dc

yeah i have 2 dads AND im bisexual get rekt (and other tweets by superheroes) by kryptonianmenace

A series of stupid moments slapped together. A social media AU.

Jacket Weather by Sohotthateveryonedied

“Okay,” Jason says. He steps forward again; Tim steps back. His heel teeters off the edge now. Jason goes very still. “Do you…want some help getting down from here? I can help you. We can go together.” He holds out his gloved hand expectantly, hopefully.

Tim looks back over his shoulder at the roaring waves below. “There are probably people somewhere who need your help.”

“That’s why I’m here with you.”

“I don’t need any help.”

“It kind of looks like you do.”

knb

Fair Play by Re_Adrienne

(explicit)

Over a week after winning the Winter Cup, Kuroko finally gets his reward.

Steel Swallow, Copper Phoenix by Siana

(explicit) (rape/non-con)

A political marriage with the firstborn son of the Teikou clan is what is supposed to make the rebellious family finally fall in line. But what Akashi Seijuro, 24th Emperor of the Rakuzan line, gets with Kuroko Tetsuya is not at all what he bargained for. It might be just what he needs though.

In the midst of lies and intrigues, will these two find their way to each other, or will the tragedies of the past separate them forever?

It reminds Tetsuya that, if tradition holds true, he will never see the outside world again. A prisoner or a Queen, the difference is often negligible.

[akaashisupremacy]

Brimming with Hope

Summary: Having broken off your engagement for an arranged marriage with Gojo, your relationship is in shreds. As you two give your relationship a second chance, what does hope look like to two disillusioned lovers?  

Gojo Satoru  x reader

Multi-fandom Masterlist || HQ Masterlist || Ao3 version

Genre: fluff, angst, exes to friends to lovers (wc: 1.5k)

“I don’t think they’ve fully made up their mind about me.” Gojo Satoru confesses to Nanami Kento.

In between assignments and his students, Gojo finds Nanami at Tokyo Jujutsu Tech’s grounds. They’re strolling along one of the many wooden hallways when Gojo opens up about you, his ex-fiancee and his current lover.

“What makes you say that?” Nanami rarely involved himself in other people’s romantic entanglements. Too much work really.

Gojo shrugs and sighs, “It’s like their affection is platonic. They care about me as a person, but I’m not sure if they have romantic feelings for me.”

The latest development of his relationship with you has been nothing short of daunting. Your relationship, albeit not exclusive was running past the six month mark. The longer he stayed around you the more pressure he felt. Commitment is not his thing. Dating his ex is also not his thing. But you certainly are.

“Can you blame them?” Nanami snorts, “How does it feel to be at the other end of the uncertainty?”

Gojo scowls in silence, hands pressed deep into his pocket.

“Well if they’re going out with you and stuff, then that’s not platonic.” Nanami offers. “Just make sure you’re not just fucking around again. Some people deserve better, Gojo. Leave them alone if you can’t get your shit together.”

Gojo stops walking. Nanami’s words are harsh and cold, voicing Gojo’s ultimate fear about himself.

Gojo opens his mouth and closes it shut. Nanami raises a brow. He senses some hesitation.

“Everything we do feels more intimate. I’ve been with other people, but this feels so…so….deep.” he murmurs.

Nanami turns around and snorts, “It’s the feelings. You’ve caught feelings.”

“This relationship feels so temporary...just when I feel like I’ve settled in, I’m to be up on my toes knowing this isn’t going to last. I realized they eventually want a family, but not with me. Because that’s just not me. It feels like there’s a time bomb waiting to go off.” Gojo continues, his tone silent and mournful.

More than anyone, Gojo knows you deep desire to be married and have a quiet family life. It's something he doesn't want and it pains him to know that you'll eventually go your separate ways.

Nanami breathes out, waiting for Gojo to catch up with a few long strides, “You can’t have everything.”

“I don’t need everything. Just the things that count.” Gojo replies, walking by Nanami’s side.

“Then you have to look for a happy middle, for you and for them.” Nanami shrugs.

Gojo scratches his head. What can he do?

————————————————————————————— You walk out of the morgue to leave Ieri to her work. As you step out, you come face to face with Nanami, who looks surprised that you’re here.

“Didn’t expect you to be around Ieri’s lair.” he comments.

“I didn’t expect to have a casualty either.” you shrug, waving around a file.

You hardly ever see Nanami after graduating. The school grounds were big. Your schedules never line up. Neither of you were particularly close.

He silently looks around if Ieri is behind you.

“So you and Gojo…” he trails.

You roll your eyes and cross your arms, “Not you too! You know what, instead of asking me, you should ask Gojo and his commitment issues, for updates.”

Your voice rings louder on the empty walls than you intended.

“I did.” he replies.

“And?”

“Commitment issues with a capital “C” indeed.” Nanami states, as if the fact was self-evident. What’s new? You sniff.

“It’s unusual to see him so conflicted about you. You used to be his rock.” he adds.

Your eyes narrow, as if asking for more information. You were never really sure how Gojo felt about you when you two were younger. He seemed attracted during your brief arranged engagement, but his attention obviously flitted elsewhere after that.

Nanami relents, “When we were freshmen, you reminded him of home. He pretends not to be homesick all the time. He’s not very good at hiding it when he talks about you.”

“Well, that feeling didn’t last, did it?” you murmur just loud enough for Nanami to hear.

The outside of the morgue has always been a little dark. You wished the lights were dimmer because you know Nanami is observing you.

“Not to defend him, but he was so wrapped in you and your engagement that he needed to find who he was outside of that. He likes attention, too. Can’t deny that. But his affections were sincere for a time.” he says, “I don’t know where his feelings stand right now. This isn’t to give you false hope, but he can be in love, even though it’s against his greater instincts and experience.”

He bows briefly to excuse himself. He needs to head in.

“But you already know that deep down. Out of all of us, you know him the longest, and I would argue, the best.” he adds.

You're left outside stunned by his words. Out of all his surviving friends, you assumed it was Nanami who knew him better than everyone else. It was you. You knew him best, even when Gojo wasn't by your side.

You smile a bit. There are some bonds broken romances can't break.

———————————————————— On a train home from your assignment, you find the bullet train crowded as usual. Rush hour is the bane of your existence in Tokyo.

As you try to find an empty seat, you’re surprised to find Gojo opening some sort of regional snack (again).

“How is it that you have so much time for souvenir shopping?” you groan in comment.

“It’s nice to see you, too.” he offers the seat next to his.

You plop down beside him, distracted. You think back to what Nanami said earlier. What was it that Nanami said? That you were Gojo’s rock? What did that mean really?

He tries to offer you some food. You wave him off dismissively. After gathering your thoughts, you decisively turn to him.

“I just want to know,” you swallow, “How did you feel about me when we were kids.”

With his mouth ajar, he blinks. Where was this coming from?

“Why?” he instinctively asks.

You purse your lips, “I’ve been meaning to ask for the longest while. I want to know your answer.”

He leans back into his seat and puts his food down in concentration.

“I thought I knew what love was and it came in the form of you. It’s kind of dumb. What would a teenager know about that kind of stuff?” he shrugs, “I liked the idea that you liked me. You were someone who supported me. You were there for me. You were generous with your time and affection.

“Looking back it’s just infatuation, isn’t it?" he asks rhetorically.

“You sounded naive.” you say, neither agreeing nor disagreeing.

He chuckles, “Who wouldn’t be at that age?”

“And sincere.” you followed up with a smile.

Gojo turns away from you. He sees glimpses of your early teenage years when he sees that smile. It was the smile you wore when he visited you at your clan’s home and helped out with your chores. You liked it when he would carry the firewood you gathered from the forest.

“...you made me feel so grown up, like I had my life together. Not everyone liked who they were engaged to, but I really liked you and you had believed in me so much.” he murmurs, “I felt so lucky to be able to marry you one day. I was literally brimming with hope. But that was 13 years ago.”

You both get off the train. The crowded station greets you both. Although you walk side by side, it is too easy for the crowd to sweep you away. You hold onto his sleeve. He doesn't notice.  

You try to say goodbye when you make it out, but he seems distracted. You begin to walk away.

“You’re not saying goodbye?” he asks, startled.

“I did, but you didn’t mind me.” you smirk with your arms crossed.

“Sorry. There’s a lot going on in my mind.” he nods, walking up beside you.

He leans in to plant a kiss on your cheek. You pull away.

“We’re in public,” you remind him. Gojo isn’t public with you on anything.

He kisses you anyway, pressing his lips on your cheek. You’re surprised but not unpleasantly so. His kiss is long and lingering. You embrace him with your arms around his waist. You briefly close your eyes to drown out the noise of the station.

Gojo can feel his heart racing a thousand kilometers per second. His shoulders relax. It's strangely freeing to be able to kiss you in public.

He knows he’s not into commitment, but whenever he sees you, he questions myself.

“I have to go now.” you bid softly.

I love you. He holds back. He waves carefully to not let his words escape his mouth. He’s not fifteen anymore. He should know better.

Gojo begins walking back to Jujutsu Tech. Being able to kiss you goodbye made him feel so grown up, like he has his life together more than he actually does. It makes him feel, once again, that he is brimming with hope.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I wrote this as a follow up for another Gojo x reader fic who used to be engaged. Check out the other parts!

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5 || Part 6 || Part 7 || Part 8

Comment or message to be added to the taglist! Or write down some comments about your feelsssss

Series Taglist: @tokyo-love-hotel@samkysnks@herownescape@cherrianne192@shamelessdonutsludgebanana@kageyamakock@shirostrbl@luvang3l@cloudsinthecosmos@httpjungoo @saturnki  @itstheee-ha-chan@gucci-froggy @soy1melk @dora-the-grownup @cherryonigiri @fiona782

If you’d like to continue being part of my taglist (JJK or Haikyuu), please let me know! I also write oneshots for both fandoms and soon I’ll be doing BSD too!

[beneaththemasks]

Analyzing Atsushi and Akutagawa pt.1 (I have a lot to say so there's gonna be a part 2)

CW: Dazai hate

first of all I want to clarify that I don’t think any of this is going to happen but it’d be really nice if it did... however, since BSD is a fiction story and my analysis is based on what would be ideal in the real life I don’t think it’s too likely for this to happen.

I think Atsushi should leave the ADA and Akutagawa should leave the Port Mafia.

To begin with, I’d like to tell you how I came up with this idea; 

The thing is that in the BSD fandom there’s this (sadly too popular) discussion about Atsushi being a good, strong and entertaining main character or not. Many times I’ve seen people discussing this as if it was simply and wholy a matter of yes or no and the more the discussion grows the more angry I get (but i get angry too easily so don’t mind me).

In my opinion Atsushi is not weak, I actually don’t think any character in BSD is tbh (I mean they’d beat the shit out of me even if they don’t know how to fight because all ever do with my life is sit on my tiny piano and play my silly little mozart). But leaving the physical strenght aside, I still don’t think he’s a weak/strong or boring/entretaining character. I think the charm of Atsushi as a MC lies elsewhere.

Yes he’s pretty, he’s kind, he has an e-boy haircut and I’d let him step on me with those worn-out dirty boots.

But he’s also a common person living among prodigies and demons.

(Really, I feel like standing up and appaluding Asagiri for choosing Atsushi as the mc and writing him the way he did because there’s nothing that could make my shitty life better than knowing that the protagonist of my favourite story in the world is someone I can relate so much to that I actually ended up learning more about myself through him.)

And yes, we’ve seen this happen many times in countless stories (yes yes haikyuu for example) where the plot worked as good as any other even though the MC took longer than the rest to get to where they were but managed to do so in the end (unlike the typical shonen mc that levels-up overnight) plus what people mostly criticize about Atsushi as a MC are his constant war flashbacks and how much he self-doubts himself.

So I came to the conclusion that it's not really Atsushi and his journey as a MC but his unresolved trauma what seems to annoy the audience instead.

And that’s how I came up with a fiction-breaking answer to your problems; If you want Atsushi to stop suffering over and over again for the same things, he has to leave the ADA and get some real therapy.

(Don’t misunderstand me, even if I accept him and love him as he’s now, I’d still love it if this were the real final for him bc it hurts me to see him suffer all the time.)

Think about it, Atsushi is just a poor boy, abandoned by hell itself and thrown into the street in the worst conditions a human being could be just to end up running into a maniac manipulator with a good heart that offers him a roof over his head on the condition he accepts a job that Atsushi himself says doesn’t want and is too afraid to be a part of and that he tried to leave once but failed to do so and then felt too guilty to try again because he eats guilt and remorse with milk for breakfast so now he has no choice but risk his life, face his archenemy physical pain to beat his enemies and constantly fear that he might not be doing what’s right or being good enough while having a huge responsibility on his bare shoulders.

As it stands, his situation can only be explained by that famous saying “it’s not that you don’t want to grow/heal, it’s that the environment is not apt for you to do it”. Yeah, no wonder he hasn’t made any progress overnight and feels so hopeless at times.

I love everyone in the ADA (not you Dazai) and their found family made out of scraps and angsty love is all I ever whish for, but just because he’s finally found people to rely on that care about him doesn’t mean it’s enough to heal so much damage (suprise suprise your family and love won’t always be enough to heal trauma). Atsushi won’t overcome his fears by facing them head-on nor will he become more independent by fighting on his own (actually we all know he hates fighting alone and that’s because he’s not in a place where he can trust in himself yet) instead, it’s very likely he’ll end up pushing himself to the limit to get “stronger” faster and end up loosing sight of himself.

And here's where Akutagawa enters.

The reason why I also mention him is because Akutagawa for me is the perfect example of why Atsushi has to stop now before it’s too late. 

Akutagawa has been past the point of no return for a long time now, he’s fought so hard to get "better" faster for the sake of being recognised by Dazai that he stopped recognising what’s real and what’s not. Akutagawa is already strong enough and has everything he needs but can’t recognise it because he works in a place where the more and faster you kill the better you are, so even though he’s the most feared member of the PM he doesn’t believe it because he hasn’t heard Dazai saying it.

To me it makes perfect sense that Dazai insists so much on making them face each other, I mean, Atsushi has everything Akutagawa wants and Akutagawa has everything Atsushi wants and as long each they stay blinded by their own unrealistic expectations they’ll keep risking their lives for something they will never accomplish under those circumstances, it turns into a vicious cycle where Dazai seems to be the only one benefiting from this since he now has two UltraRare awakened subordinates to fight for the sake of his book or whatever he wants. (but don’t let me get too excited about this topic ‘cause I could talk about Dazai for 3 days)

Yes I know I know, it was a very good thing that Asagiri decided to break that toxic vicious cycle and made one of them think for both to finally make Atsushi challenge Akutagawa to stop killing for six months as a condition to fight with him (that's called GROWTH, breaking out of the cage, abandoning the nest, etc).

But unlike Atsushi, Akutagawa doesn’t have many people to rely on when the time all of his enemies show up -after mori has beaten the fuck out of him for not showing results and lowers his rank to the same Oda had- to make him pay (let’s be honest the mafia couldn’t care less about the errand boy).

Basically, Aku has to leave the Port Mafia in order to stay safe, gain perspective and find a reason to live of his own rather than sit and wait for dazai to approve of his every move (the same goes for Sushi, he has to stop throwing himself off of high buildings to save people and stopping bullets with his mouth to be validated by his peers). 

But yeah, Akutagawa is probably not going to leave the PM and Atsushi is probably not going to leave the ADA but as someone who really wants to see them doing some real growth and barely stands this “just forget your trauma and fight” thing that’s going on I had to say it.

I mean, look at Dazai, it was no untill Oda told him he clearly wasn’t going to find a purpose to live that he decided that mayyyyybe the PM was not a good place to try spiritual healing.

What’s more, I’d say almost every single character in BSD is too fucked up to be able to heal in the kind of environmet they work at and that they must have let the pain sink or whatever bc they jsut don’t want to change their lives but idk man that’s fine if it makes them happy. 

:)

[pugszler]

Bnha and/or bsd? For the ask game

aaand time for bsd! i am both ecstatic and mortified to talk aloud about these characters lmao 🙈 i'm putting this under a read more

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)

okay let's just get this over with--it's akutagawa. he is also the answer to the rest of the following questions too okay post over /gen lmao

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)

ah. err. uh. hm... well, besides my obvious answer, i guess almost everyone in the show has at least a Little bit of "baby" energy lol... can i say kyouka? i mean this in the Not-weirdest way Possible. she's just rlly fucking adorable. also, alternative answer is karl the raccoon :>

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)

hm well i'm not too acquainted w/ the bsd fandom like even the slightest bit at all so idk exactly how (under)appreciated this character is but i kinda just have a feeling about it, but kunikida! i rlly like him and he makes me feel rlly happy in a way i don't quite understand yet... fuck man, i even kinda feel like i myself don't appreciate him enough! i need to focus on him more!

also i'm just gonna shout out odasaku here bc i Need to mention him somewhere on this post but idk where else to mention him lmao. i have a feeling he's a fandom favorite tho? ......i hope he is at least lmao. he should be a fan favorite.

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)

gin, altho i kinda bet she's prob a big fave for a lot of ppl too. and idk if she gets to have any more significant plot relevance post-s3 of the anime?

also my memory of the actual serious plot of the series is extremely foggy in my head so excuse me if this is a bad answer but i get rlly excited when ango shows up... altho tbh it's mostly just bc i love it when his voice actor jun fukuyama gets to voice meek-looking megane characters lmao. i know that ango does some major shit but i honestly can't remember if it was good shit or bad shit... ah well. i don't rlly think anyone in bsd is ever Only doing good shit so it's fine lmao

ALSO shout out to the minor anime-only character from s1 that kaito ishikawa got to voice for two eps before he got killed :(

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh haha i don't think i need to say anything here

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)

dazai. tbh i'm not a big fan of him, but i don't necessarily hate him? it's rlly rlly difficult to hate him anyway since he's fucking hilarious and voiced by mamoru miyano so like. yeah. anyway he's always picking on EVERYONE and he's always one step ahead of Everyone and that annoys the fuck out of me so yeah man i'd mess w him if i could. he kinda rlly deserves it tbh. also it would be hilarious :)

oh and same for ranpo. he annoys me too bc he's mean but also i appreciate him Slightly more bc he's voiced by hiroshi kamiya.... i think it's p much Impossible for me to truly dislike any character that man voices lmao

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)

well, ougai's a given.

there's also fitzgerald but i mostly just hate him bc he's annoying as fuck and i HATE that he didn't fucking die after sskk beat his ass and whoever tf is writing this series was like "yes, i think i will let fitzgerald live and give him more content and plot relevance :) MUCH MORE :))) hehe everybody loves this guy!" NOOO SHUT UP UGH.

also i don't remember who the fuck that one guy is with the hat (not chuuya, the other hat guy) or what the fuck he was doing (literally could not understand a Single thing about what he (or dazai) was doing in dead apple) but i don't like him. and i don't like that everyone else seems to like him? i have no idea what his deal is and i think he's annoying bye

(ask game post)

[maddohatta]

Icarus Ascending

I haven't written for BSD yet officially, but here's my jump into the fandom. It's a planned multi chapter fic but I'm not sure how many chapters this will have just yet.

Pairings : Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya, Ougai Mori/Ozaki Kouyou, Gin/Higuchi Ichiyou

Trying to be a god when you were purely mortal was nothing but a sin, the embodiment of greed. Yet to try and capture one that was blessed by the gods and harness their power? That was pure foolishness, and chaos would be the only result.

Chuuya just wants to live peacefully with his new family, yet there was this bastard that Dazai was trying to keep away from him. What did he want with him anyways? He was just someone with an ability--an executive of the Port Mafia. It wasn't like he was god.

Heavy pelting of raindrops was what brought a slow awakening to him. Chuuya could smell the scent of rain, the scent of something that was indiscernible, yet comforting all at once. He loved the smell of wet leaves, the calming drone of the raindrops hitting the window. It was calming, comforting—and all too jarring at the moment.

Why did that memory have to come back to him?

Feeling his chest clench in phantom pain, he knew that he looked as well as he did. Like shit.

White hot pain lanced through his hands, making his arms feel like they were skewered with metal rods.

He knew how that felt, just not through his arms. In his younger years, when he first started out, he had been stabbed through the side by the Golden Demon. That was something that he never wanted to relive.

Which was why he got better, and now even though Kouyou was still one of the only ones that could and would keep him on his toes in a fight, he hadn’t had the privilege of feeling that blade through him once more. It was something that he was glad of.

He knew that blood and pain was what so many members of the mafia went though to stay alive, and it was more than that; that really was drenching those with ambition. He had been drenched in his own blood, worked to the point where he couldn’t even stand up anymore, and he still kept going. All of the scars, the sweat and blood that he put into the mafia, as well as clawing his way up to his position of executive was worth it.

It was all worth it, yet why did he feel like he was falling to pieces?

It was days like this that reminded him what he had dealt with before the mafia. One of the main reasons that he felt the need to wear his gloves most of the time, how he wasn’t all completely there like he tried to portray he was.

Being an orphan with an ability could be hard.

Several things could happen if people got wind of a moldable ability user. Being kidnapped and tortured until their mind broke, so that they’d do whatever what the person that saved them would do; possibly being killed if they disagreed. There was the other method, that the child would have to sleep with one eye open because of the fact that several people wanted them to further their own goal in life. Child trafficking was another thing, because of the fact that certain abilities made potential customers want to raise the amount of money they would pay for a good slave.

The thought made him scowl unconsciously.

He had been through another hell. He had gone from killing his adopted father in his defense after the bastard had killed his adopted mother. Unfortunately, his step father was of the greedy sort, and after he realized that this little redheaded child had such an interesting ability, he had tried to sell him for money when he was five years old.

Fuck everything if he didn’t realize what he was doing after he said that he would be bloody rich, and that’s when he started pulling away even more. He had run away from his home before, and while he tolerated his adopted father—he really wasn’t even there most of the time, because his mother had been separated from him for almost a year at that point.

It was greed and debt that brought death back into his life.

The bastard was deep in debt with the Italian mafia, and they even had a few small footholds within Japan as well. The Italian mafia worked quite well with Russia’s own mafia, and because of the fact that he was in debt with both of them, was why he was looking for fast and easy money.

Chuuya knew one thing, he hated being tied up. Once that bastard had tried to tie him up, ranting about finally being debt free, he had started to crack.

His poor adopted mother had an inkling of what has going on when she heard him swearing up a storm at the pitiful fool, and when she had stood between him and what he saw was his money—he had shot her point blank.

That was the last straw for him, and he could feel the rage that had been building up finally release with the feeling of warm blood splattered all over his face.

She had tried to protect him, and had been killed for it.

She had died to save him.

“You won’t take Chuuya from me!”

Those were her last words, ones intended to protect him.

Mama had died for him, protecting him.

“Mama..” He murmured, feeling himself shake.

He could feel the splashes of warm blood that trickled down his face, the opened eyed stare of shock that were in those green eyes of the mother that he had cherished so much.

She was the only one that cared. The only one that wanted to take care of him, to make him happy.

She even knew French. She didn’t want him to lose his heritage, so she kept speaking their shared beautiful language in their house, as well as Japanese.

“Je t’aimerai toujours maman.”

The last words that he had spoken to her this morning had been that he would always love her, his mother.

That hadn’t changed, and he knew that he always would.

“Mama….” He murmured again, feeling cold all over. It was like nothing mattered anymore, like it was his fault that those warm green eyes weren’t going to be able to show him love ever again. It was his fault.

It was his fault.

It was his fault!

His mother loved him, and she died for him.

It was his fault…no, it wasn’t.

All he had done was love his mother, wanting nothing more to make her smile. He loved her smile, and that was enough for him.

He loved her, and he lost her. That was something that he had been afraid of. He hadn’t wanted to get close to someone, and when he finally allowed himself to stop being so standoffish, he had grown to love his adopted mother. That love now brought him to heartbreak.

Why had she protected him then?

He was the one that was supposed to protect her.

“You…”

Feeling his arm being grabbed violently, he heard the deranged laughter of his mother’s ex echo in the room.

“Now that she’s gone, no one is going to stop me. They will pay me handsomely to take you off my hands, boy.”

A cold fury came over him. He had been angry before, but this was something entirely different.

“Don't touch me!” He hissed out, feeling his teeth grind together.

“Never,” He began, feeling himself become lighter as he felt the icy anger seep into his bones.

Ripping his arm from the man’s grasp, he noticed the look of fear in his eyes.

Good. He should be afraid.

“What, are you trying to defend yourself now?” He asked, cocking a brow. “You couldn’t even defend poor Madeliné.”

That was the last straw, as he noticed that the bastard had the gall to kick his mother’s body.

“Don't touch her!!” He screamed out, feeling like something snapped in his head.

His head pounded, and even though he could see it was like it wasn’t him within his body.

She shouldn’t have been harmed. She was just trying to save him.

“Maman…” He murmured, his wish of righting his mother back onto her side becoming a reality by just wishing it. Takashi, the bastard, was frozen still in his tracks, silent.

Thank god, he needed to shut up.

No, he wanted to see the bastard burn.

He needed to feel all of the rage and despair that maman felt, that he felt—he needed to feel like his very world had been ripped out from underneath him.

He needed to be ripped to shreds.

The only thing was, no one was going to be there to piece him back together.

“Just what in the hell are you doing brat?! I can’t move!!” Takashi bellowed, shaking where he stood. Chuuya smirked, realizing that something was indeed going on.

Lifting his arm, he realized faintly that he was glowing.

Ah, it was him, wasn’t it?

Good. That meant that he was the one that was making him quake in fear.

The realization of this was like a rush. He felt powerful, and as he thought of pushing the bastard backwards and pinning him to the ground he downright laughed as he realized that it worked.

“What in the hell is going o-on?” He cried out, trying to sit up. He was only able to flail about in his place. Chuuya had noticed before that when he got too emotional things would start to float around him, and he had tried to work with that to calm him down, but he had lost his focus instead, which made everything clatter to the floor.

Now, even though he was past the worst anger he had ever experienced, he could feel a dead calm within his mind. Oh, he knew what he wanted to do. He knew what he had to do, and it was like the devil was whispering in his ear.

“Tear him apart,” The voice whispered, sounding full of promise yet protective all at once. “You'll get revenge for maman.”

He just wanted to see Maman smile again, yet that wasn’t going to happen.

Feeling himself move over to the prone form of Takashi, he grinned, full of teeth and anger.

“You think you’ll take me, that you’ll sell me?” A deranged chuckle escaped him. Oh yes, the voice was right, he should take revenge for his mother. He needed to see him suffer, to let him experience just what his mother had and more.

“You little fucking bitch, let me go!”

He could feel something wrap it’s arms around him. He knew that no one was there, but it was like warmth was seeping into him. Warmth that was keeping the cold at bay. He was chasing the warmth, wanting it to stay.

“You’ll never escape darling.” He murmured, his hands twitching as the pocket knife that he carried for protection was fished out of his pocket. Flipping it open, he noticed the surefire flash of fear in the man’s eyes.

Chuckling, he felt like he was pushed back this time, and he was the one taking a back seat.

Be still little one, I will finish this for you.

Why did he feel like he was safe from harm?

He knew that he was in safe hands, but why was it like he was talking to himself, yet not?

Chuuya could feel his eyes close, and then when he opened them again, his vision began to haze over.

“Do not wake me again....” He could hear himself muttering, and it was like he had inhaled several cups of coffee all at once. He could see, yet he couldn’t, and all that he heard was the sound of screams.

Taking a deep breath he could hear the voice again, this time sounding pleased.

“Yes, scream for me more. How much did maman scream when she was beaten by you months ago? Don’t lie, I saw the bruises that she tried to cover up….”

Oh, that. He still was livid about that fact, and he could feel himself slam his foot down on the bastard’s right hand, and with the added pressure of gravity, he had crushed the bones within it. Several crunches and a blood curdling scream came from Takashi’s prone form, and he could only find himself smirking in delight.

Good, he needed to suffer more.

“Did that hurt?” He asked with false sincerity.

He only received a garbled scream as a result.

“Oh, what a pity.” He replied, a happy smile turning his lips upwards. “I was hoping that you’d actually answer me.” Because he didn’t, Chuuya felt himself direct his anger upon another part of Takashi’s body, this time it was on his left foot.

“Oops.” He muttered, whistling some as he heard another series of crunches and a high whimper that turned into complete sobbing as blood splattered along the floor. He knew that he had used enough pressure to keep the man from bleeding out before he was finished, but he also knew that he couldn’t afford to dawdle too much.

Chuuya felt numb. Numb yet warm, and he could hear a gentle croon in his ears. The beat of someone’s heart was soothing him, and it was keeping himself from going off the deep end. He was glad that it felt like someone was still embracing him, and he held onto that feeling with all he had.

“Don't worry my love, nothing will harm you.”

Hearing that just made him miss his mother even more.

Shuddering as he felt his limbs twitch, he watched with satisfaction as he watched the man breathe in a shaky, pain filled breath.

A high pitched whine came from him when he tried to speak, which filled Chuuya with a sense of incredible glee. Oh, he was finally starting to hurt!

A dull ringing echoed in his ears as he felt his foot slam down onto his left knee. This time, there was a rather interesting squelch, coupled with a loud popping sound and the unmistakeable sound of bone breaking. What made this even more interesting was that he could hear something snap.

Muscle maybe? It didn’t matter.

Another scream tore from Takashi’s throat, and as he took a glance at the now pale and beaten man he grinned toothily.

“Does it hurt, Ta-ka-shi?” He cooed out, dragging his foot up from the man’s shattered and bloody knee, noting how he was shivering and whimpering like a kicked puppy.

He will do more by the time I'm done with him.

“N-no you monster!” Takashi cried out, coughing some as Chuuya kicked him in the ribs for the backtalk. He made sure to not layer his ability with it because he wanted to draw this out as long as possible.

His dear phoenix had dealt with more than enough. It was time for him to fly free.

Monster? Was he a monster? Just what made this man, whom had beaten and abused his mother in several ways, had the reason to call him a monster? He wasn’t the one that deserved that moniker.

Takashi was. For what he had done to his mother, for what he had tried to do to him.

“Me, the monster?” He asked lightly, tilting his head curiously. His hair had fallen over his eyes as he let the confusion that he was feeling show on his face, and he hummed lightly in question. The thought was laughable, really. He was the one that was the monster? Takashi should look in a mirror, really.

Though that was the problem there. Even if he did look in a mirror, he would just see himself and not the monster that he really was.

It was rather disappointing.

Yet at the same time he was glad that he didn’t see himself as a monster because he could play with him more.

“I'm not the one that’s the monster here.” He reminded Takashi, pressing the heel of his foot on the muscle of the man’s left thigh. Without a thought he closed the pocket knife he had been carrying and threw it, knowing instinctively that he could call it back. He was edging closer to simply slamming his foot down and crushing any sense of him being male again, though he did have other plans as well.

To save that for later, or to do it now?

Decisions, decisions.

“Should I show you just how loud you can scream? You wouldn’t be able to use this ever again.” He commented idly, sighing almost as if it was a pity. He held his foot up, making a slight downwards motion that had the man squealing and choking on his own spit as he tried to jerk away from him.

Said motion got a delighted laugh from him, and in the back of his head, Chuuya could feel just how amused his protector was.

It was odd, seeing things from this perspective. Too odd, almost. Yet here he was doing things that he wished that he could have for his mother, and yet it wasn’t him. Even though it was his body doing the damage, it wasn’t him that committed the actions.

That was weird enough to make sense of in his own head, how would he make sense of it if he actually said it?

Humming wordlessly he smirked.

“Now do we start here, or do we take another joint?”

It was pretty funny seeing that Takashi spit out blood, hoping to stain his clothing. He didn’t care if he did, so it was a moot point. Though he did wonder how he had a bloody mouth anyways for a few seconds, he figured that he had either bit his tongue or the inside of his cheek.

“Fuck you.” He hissed out, the words sounding harsh as he tried to breathe in deeply, to get breath into his lungs and hopefully to steel himself against what was to come.

Now that, was just funny.

“Even if I could, you would be not even on the list of people I would.” He replied, using more force to cause the man’s bones to creak, to strain his muscles and make him gasp out in pain. It was a rather nifty gift, to be able to control gravity. He knew just how far he could go in his beloved phoenix’s body, and he was starting to realize that he couldn’t go too much further.

Chuuya would collapse as soon as he gave him back control.

He needed to make sure he was safe before that happened.

No one would hurt him like this again if he could help it.

Deciding to skip some of the playing, he slammed his foot down onto the bastard’s right knee once he had both feet back onto the ground. It didn’t take him too much force to feel the give of bone underneath his foot, and it was somewhat satisfying to hear another scream come from Takashi.

This time, it was harsh and it ended in a series of wet coughs.

Good, he needed to feel more pain.

“Yo-ah!” He gasped out, his voice catching as he fought the pain that he was in, and he would have more than likely choked on his own blood if he wasn’t able to turn his neck and cough up more onto the ground.

Humming in amusement he tsked a few times.

“Now don’t play that way, you know that you’re not going to get away from me.” He chided lightly, keeping his voice low yet mellow at the same time. He made it completely obvious that he was playing with the man, and to show him once again, he lifted the knife that had clattered to the ground earlier with his own ability, hovering it above his head.

“Oh, were you going to use this on me if I resisted? Too bad for you, I already know what I’ll do with it.”

His phoenix had always had an affinity for knives for some reason, and it did please him. They were always something that had fascinated him, to a certain degree, because gravity worked in certain ways against them. You could make them even more deadly by altering how they flew, or  stopped them completely, turning them into hunks of metal and then using them as projectiles.

“You were always a—damned pest!” He gasped out, all of the air wheezing out of his lungs as it felt like his chest was compressed by an unknown weight, and Takashi could almost swear that his ribs were creaking.

Fuck.

He wanted to live, he wanted to live so much. Yet with how it seemed like the boy was possessed by something, he knew that wasn’t going to be the most likely outcome.

If only he could move!

Hearing a grating laugh, he felt his head throb in pain. Did he say that out loud? Shit, he knew that he was already bleeding out—he had to have been with everything that had been done to him, and he was only just holding onto his sanity, to his consciousness.

“Don't go and pass out on me now, you bastard. I still have so much more to do to you!” Chuuya hissed out, not caring if he stepped on the man’s chest as he leaned down, reaching out and grasping Takashi’s head and pulling it up. He wanted the man to see him, to have his face and smirk seared into his mind before he really offed him.

Feeling something twist in the back of his mind, he knew that he had to make this quick.

The little one was starting to feel pain, and that pain was starting to echo over to himself. He wasn’t wanting to tear his partner’s body apart, his precious little one—he had to finish this once and for all.

“I'm so tired…”

Feeling Chuuya waver some, he sighed, turning his attention back to the man that was on the verge of passing out due to blood loss and sheer pain. “Come now, here’s what I’ll do to you.” He purred out, twirling the knife in his hands and plunging It down into the man’s chest.

A garbled screech was what he received, and he idly let go of the now dead Takashi’s hair, letting his skull slam to the ground. He might have been a bit vindictive by letting his power increase the impact, which made the idiot’s skull shatter.

Blood sprayed across the floor in hot gushes, and it stopped rather fast as brain matter oozed out of the gaping hole now at the top and sides of what used to be Takashi’s skull.

A soft sobbing could be heard in his ears, and that was what queued him in on his little one’s emotional state. Everything was now hitting him, and all he wanted was for everything to go away. To not have to see this, and to bury his mother.

“Mama…we need to get her away from this place.”

The thought echoed in his mind, and he couldn’t help but to agree with it. The woman had been battered, but she was a diamond in the darkness for them. She was lovely, and she had protected his little one from anything she could.

“Indeed. We'll give her a proper send off.”

He could feel the desire for a burial, but at the same time he knew that with what he wanted to do to this place—to make sure it was never found again, that wasn’t going to be an option. He had always heard of fire being the way to heaven, and he was damned hoping this was the case.

She deserved the best after all.

It was almost a sad thing, seeing the almost decapitated remains of the murderer on the ground, and with merely a thought he released gravity’s hold from the corpse. He wasn’t going to need the more finite position he had put it in before. Instead he flicked his hand, letting the corpse close in on itself—then he crushed it. Using enough force to grind bones, he paid little attention to entrails and muscle dripping down onto the floor—it would be gone soon enough anyways.

Sighing, he turned back to where he he had left his mother, rather, their mother and felt his chest tighten. He wasn’t used to feeling like this, and he knew the it wasn’t just going to be his little one that was going to be forever changed because of it.

For once he was glad that he kicked the fool a ways away then pinned him. That monster’s blood hadn’t touched Madeliné, which he was forever grateful for.

Because of the fact that he was so small, it was going to be hard to carry her back to her room, even with his control over gravity. Sighing, he made it so that he was able to lift up his mother, not caring too much that her legs were dangling as he held her close to his heart.

She was so cold.

It was really setting in now, that he wasn’t going to be able to see her again, to see her smile. To feel her hug him ever again.

“I wish this never happened, maman.” He murmured softly, padding back to her room and lying her down on the bad. It was eerie, seeing her so still. Closing her eyes because he couldn’t bear to see them sightless like this, he carefully arranged her so it looked like she was sleeping upon the covers.

He was the only one that knew different however.

Chuuya stared forlornly down at his mother, brushing her hair from her face.

“Je t’aimerai toujours maman.” He repeated again, feeling tears well up in his eyes. They stung, and he knew that before he broke down, before they both broke down, he needed to finish this. Good thing they loved barbecue so much after being introduced to it on a trip to France, because they still had what he needed to burn this place down.

Moving to the kitchen, he barely recognized that he had grabbed lighter fluid and a set of matches.

Wordlessly he popped open the bottle of lighter fluid and liberally coated the bed and his mother in it, then moved around the house, making sure to pour higher concentrations of it where blood had pooled.

He had been at the door when he flipped the matchbook open, and blue eyes stared into the flame that had been created with the flick of his wrist.

Being reminded once again that it was raining when the drone of raindrops hitting the window echoed through the now quiet house, he dropped the match, watching as flames licked at the accelerant. Mindlessly he continued to watch the whole place go up in flames, starting with the living room and then leading into the kitchen, then finally into his mother’s room.

“Au revoir, maman.” He spoke aloud, feeling like every step that he took away from the house was like a knife being shoved deeper into his heart.

Feeling like it took hours to get away from his old house, Chuuya realized faintly that he didn’t know where they were. They were in a darker part of town though, one that he knew that he should stay away from.

He was way too tired to make sure that people would stay away from him.

I can’t…why does it hurt so much?

It was time for him to let his little one have control back.

Looking down, he noticed that his hands were shaking, and he had to stop in his tracks, looking up at the sky as rain continued to fall.

Giving up control again was easy, almost like breathing.

Once Chuuya was back on the outside, he could feel his head spin. It felt like everything was crushing down on him—his head was pounding and it was hard to stand up straight.

Staggering, he fell forward, bracing himself agains the streetlamp that had been looming overhead. God, he was glad that this was one of the better cities to be in, because there were so many different places that he could hide.

He needed to hide, to find a safe place.

He was so tired. So very tired.

So utterly alone.

“What…do I do now?” He asked himself, gaining his bearings. He was still dizzy as hell, and because of that he was wary of moving at all. Yet he knew that he had to because he wasn’t safe out in the open like this. He knew that he wasn’t on the waterfront, which was a damned good thing because he would be in more danger if he was.

“Oh fuck.” He muttered as he finally started to walk again. It felt like he was walking over hot coals. Every little step he took had his muscles screaming at him, and he had to bite his lip to make sure he wouldn’t cry out.

He had just ripped the chains off him that threatened to shackle him down, he wasn’t going to go back to another set of them!

Gasping in surprise when he felt himself pitch forward, he groaned internally.

Fuck, not now!

“N-no!” He whimpered out, seeing the ground coming closer.

More than expecting the impact, he knew that he was going to be in for more pain once he hit the pavement. What he hadn’t been expecting was falling into something soft.

“Damn…" He grit out, feeling his head throb again.

Was he caught by someone? He needed to get away, and quick!

Chuuya knew that he was in trouble when a set of hands grasped his shoulders, pulling him up some.

Fucking hell that hurt!

“Now what are you doing here by yourself? You look positively dreadful.” A smooth voice commented, and he felt his breath catch.

He was a goner.

“Come now, Mori. We should at least let the boy rest in a warm place, away from the rain. Can’t you see the smoke in the distance?” The female voice was soothing, which had him hoping that maybe he wasn’t in the hands of traffickers.

That was the wrong frame of thinking, but he was so tired.

He just wanted to sleep, to not think about anything.

It was something else, when he noticed that he was now being sheltered from the rain. The hands on his shoulders had disappeared, and he was now bundled in warmth, the feeling of someone hugging him as they dropped down to his height.

The scent of sakura was what really shattered the last of his control, and he clung to the unknown woman and wept.

Everything hurt, and with how it was raining, it was like the sky was crying with him.