#but I can clearly see him bringing either ed or Izzy (both? both) right to the edge - and stopping and making them beg for it

[nasturtiumsforbreakfast]

Once again thinking about Stede and Ed fucking with the rhythm of a storm at sea

Could be all dramatic and harsh, with the storm an all, or like slow and emotional, calming Ed down from jumping at the thunder, or (and this made me smile) soft and giggly, laughing every time they get thrown about by a wave

[scarrletmoon]

im not trying to start shit so im not tagging this but i'm just thinking about ed/izzy and how it doesn't make sense

like. izzy feels like the shitty ex who's convinced you that no one else gets you and no one ever will, so as uncomfortable as you feel with him, as much as it feels like you're missing something, you don't know exactly WHAT you're missing. plus, you've never had a relationship that's lasted as long as this one, and everyone says relationships are hard work. so maybe this IS what you deserve. at the end of the day, yeah he's an angry little fucker but he's loyal. you know he'll always have your back bc he's dedicated like no one else. and what's a relationship if not respect and loyalty?

except izzy has a very concrete but wrong idea of who ed is. he wants ed to fit a certain mould, which has severely stunted ed's growth and made him miserable.

i get ed/izzy as like, a terrible toxic relationship where two people stay together bc they think they have no one else -- izzy clings to ed bc blackbeard represents everything he wants to be as a man, ed stays with izzy bc he's useful and like, look at the poor guy, you can't just ditch him after 20 years. ed's not HEARTLESS. izzy's good, deep down.

deep, deep down

but then you see how stede immediately sees the best in ed, knows that ed can do better. stede brings out the softer parts that ed's been unable to access for years, doesn't shame him for not being a paragon of manliness or whatever. ed is HAPPY with stede.

and like, stede is a BITCH. he's selfish, obnoxious, shamelessly grandiose and loves being the center of attention, will happily ignore other people's needs to serve his own and also somehow has such terrible self esteem that he thinks he doesn't actually matter at the end of the day

but stede CARES. he never tries to really change anyone to fit an image he approves of. he doesn't go out of his way to harm anyone unless they've harmed him or someone he loves. his loyalty isn't conditional; when he loves ed, he loves him exactly as he is. and i think the reason why he dislikes Jack so much is bc jack turns him into this dumb frat boy who doesn't think for himself and he knows ed is better than that. ed reads it as judgement bc that's all he's ever gotten from others. but stede means it as "there is so much good in you already" rather than "i wish you would change into a shape i approve of"

so like. WHY DO PEOPLE THINK ED WOULD BE HAPPIER WITH IZZY. ed isn't even romantically attracted to izzy? izzy clearly, obviously, is HOPELESSLY in love with ed. but it's worse for both of them if they stay together, as friends or romantic partners. if they stay together, they stagnate. apart, ed can flourish. idk about izzy but maybe he'd be less of a cunt if he loosened his sphincter and learned that he doesn't ACTUALLY have to control everything in his sight

i get relating to izzy as someone who's been in love with someone who'll never love them back, but like. i'm sorry. im so sorry. but you should think better of yourself than izzy. you don't have to be miserable, and part of finding your own happiness might involve leaving the person you've been in love with for years who's never going to give you what you need

not saying you can't like the little gremlin but i'm just very confused about people who impart this softness onto him that doesn't actually exist, and won't exist until he exhibits some desire to change as a person

anyway if anyone comes to this post or my inbox cussing me out for this, im just blocking on sight bc i'm not fighting with izzy fans again who'd rather be cruel than either engage respectfully or just ignore me

if you dont like what i have to say, the block button is literally!! right there!!

[obsidiancreates]

Ed's Sea Cred (Part 9)

Fear Goes Both Ways

In hindsight, maybe this wasn't the best idea.

Maybe stopping a busy merchant ship on a tight schedule to try and trade an odd and sort of obviously stolen assortment of stolen goods wasn't the best idea.

Maybe stressing how valuable the items were to the clearly tired and worn-down crew wasn't the best idea.

Maybe then saying there was plenty of money aboard to pay for the leather with wasn't the best idea.

Of course, if Stede had known half the opposing crew were either former Navy or dreamt of being in The Navy and settled, he wouldn't have done any of that. He probably also wouldn't have touched one man's leather shirt and praised the 'lived-in quality' of it.

As the first sword positioned itself over his throat, he tried for a smile. "Ah, perhaps we can forget this ever happened? Two ships merely passing in the night, so to say?"

The other man gave a tight smile. "It's midday."

He drew his sword back and swung.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ed didn't want to hide. Of course he fuckin' didn't, what kind of pirate hides during a raid?

But Frenchie had led him and his crew over to the stairs and told them to duck down and watch. "Its just that, you all look like natural-born killers and pirates, and that might give us away a bit," Frenchie had said.

Ed couldn't really argue.

And then he watched Stede completely fuck it all up.

"Avast, ye!" Stede had shouted at the other vessel as they got close. "Might I interest your fine vessel in a bit of trade?"

"They're gonna kill 'im," Izzy muttered from beside Ed. He didn't sound very torn up about the idea.

Ed watched Wee John and Oluwande and Buttons bring over some very valuable, very stolen items, and watched the suspicion light in the merchants' eyes. Stede had shown off the haul with great theatrics and upselling. The merchants had been interested.

But hadn't accepted the trade.

Ed saw the plan forming in their minds before Stede even touched that guy's shirt.

Now he watches a sword arc through the air, feels satisfaction just radiating off of Izzy as Fang gasps and Ivan sucks in a breath-

And a wave rocked the boat and Stede fell to the side. The attacking merchant also tripped, the momentum of his swing dragging him forward.

Right over the edge of the ship and into the water.

"Ah," Stede says, looking down into the waves. The merchant doesn't resurface. "That ahum, wasn't ideal, was it?"

Ed closes his eyes. He can't watch this.

"Now now gents! I'm sure we can work this out without any-"

"We want the fucking loot, pirate."

"Oh, so you'll reconsi-"

"We're taking it from you."

"Well-! Then you're the pirates!"

"Not piracy if it's from a pirate. Not murder if it's to a murderer."

"I-I'm not a murderer." Stede's voice shakes with something other than nerves of lying. Something... deeper.

"Yeah, you're some rich twat who hired a bunch of them. Close enough." There's the sound of a gun being cocked.

"Wait, I think you should think this through fi-!"

BANG!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Stupid fuckin' Stede Bonnet.

"Wait, I think you should think this through fi-!"

Izzy can't wait to see Stede get his brains blown out. Ed's got his eyes closed, and Fang and Ivan almost jump into action before Izzy holds them back. Izzy notices that Stede's own crew aren't making any moves. Hah, less loyal than they pretended, eh? Least there's some sense aboard.

Another wave hits the boat, and the man with the gun falls forward. The gun falls with him of course, and Izzy watches the man's arm hit the deck first, twist up into his chest-

BANG!

The blood flies everywhere, splatters across the deck, across Stede Bonnet's stupid fucking face. His eyes are wide with horror, a tired horror, and Izzy scowls. Fucker gets that lucky, and he's still too fuckin' soft to enjoy it.

"Can we please talk this out?" he asks again in a shaking voice, like a pathetic child whimpering to his bullies.

The merchants are staring in shock at their dead crewmate. And then at Stede in terror.

And then rage.

But what happens next is such a fucking whirlwind that Izzy can't fucking understand it.

Feet get caught on ropes and swords drive into flesh. Guns are cocked and aimed and the shooter ends up with a hole in their throat or their chest. People go over the side of the ship and never bob back up.

Stede's crew kill and maim their fair, and Izzy is actually impressed. The cook does good work with his cleaver and spiked bat, and the navigator chews through a man's throat with some impressive metal fangs. The scribe boy hides, because he's irritatingly alike to his captain, but his fuckin' boyfriend gets a couple kills in.

And Stede fucking Bonnet is in the middle of it all, shouting and ducking and trying to tell everyone to calm down, and every time he does someone goes for a kill, and every time it fucking backfires.

Every.

Fucking.

Time.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ed stands in the middle of the blood-soaked deck, looking around with his eyes as wide as they can possibly be.

"When... when you cut loose... you really cut loose," he says slowly.

Stede, as blood-soaked as the wood beneath their feet, swallows. "Thanks."

He doesn't sound thankful.

Ed watches Fang and Izzy help toss some bodies overboard. There's a lot of them. A lot.

"Sorry."

Ed looks at Stede. "For what, man?"

"Your book said I don't get blood on me." Stede looks down at himself.

"Yeah, well... we already figured out it wasn't very accurate, right man? ... On the bright side, this actually turned out to be a pretty good story to tell at a bar. Just gotta embellish it a little."

"This... is a good story? This is why people are afraid."

"Not if you tell it the right way. Someone falling overboard before they stab you is fuckin' funny, man. That's like, a one-in-a-million chance."

"Right. Right, it is. Completely uncommon. Um, I'm actually going to go head down." Stede gives Ed a tight smile. "Have to wash this before the stains set in."

Stede walks away, and Ed watches him go.

He doesn't think he did a very good job of putting a positive spin on this.

But the raid was successful, wasn't it? Even if it was... messy. Ed likes a good messy raid. Leaves the death blows to his crew, but a good maim spree usually ends pretty fuckin' bloody.

So why does he feel so sick over this one?

"Hey, mate." He grabs Black Pete by the arm. "Is this how your raids usually go?"

Pete thinks for a second. "No... usually it happens on the other boat."

[finn-nelson-for-the-win]

New Beginnings: Chapter 5

Hello, my lovelies! I know that it’s been a while (ok, a REALLY long time) since the last update, but I haven’t had the time to do as much writing as I would have liked in recent weeks, so alas! Here we are…As always, more of my pointless rambling can be found in my Author’s Note beneath the tags.

If you want to get caught up on the previous chapters of this story or read any of my other writing, look no further!

***

The elevator chimed, signaling that they had reached their intended floor and the metal doors slid open slowly.

“Alright, Rachel. The dorm that you will be staying in temporarily will be just around the corner from here. Number 335, if my memory serves me correctly,” Greg said as he gestured for Rae to exit the elevator in front of him.

She nodded silently and followed the directions that Greg had given her until she stood in front of an unassuming white door adorned with metal numbers indicating that this was dorm number 335.

Rae stepped aside to let Greg dig through the pocket of his jeans to retrieve the key to the dorm that she would be officially living in beginning tomorrow morning.

“After you, Rachel,” Greg said once the door was unlocked and he stood with the door open wide.

Rae walked hesitantly into the dorm room, unable to shake the feeling that she was an intruder despite this being the place where she had been assigned to live for the duration of the repair process on their previous dorm.

Rae and Greg had decided to visit her new dorm and see if her new roommate was there to introduce the two girls prior to moving the majority of Rae’s belongings into the new dorm, and as Rae looked around, she could clearly tell which side of the room had been cleared out and designated for her. Rae was walking towards the simple desk that she assumed to be hers when a door in the far corner of the small dorm opened loudly, causing her to jump.

“Oh! You surprised me,” Rae said with a nervous chuckle when she noticed a girl with deep tan skin and long hair walk into the room.

“You’re my new roommate, I presume?” The girl stated plainly as she walked across the room towards the side that clearly belonged to her.

“Yes, I am. My name is Rachel, but I go by Rae.”

“Good to know. My name is Adrienne,” she said as she cast a quick glance over her shoulder and gave Rae a nod in greeting, “are you going to bring any of your stuff in here? I was told I’d be having a roommate, so I tried to clear enough space for whatever you have in the common spaces that we share.”

“Rae and I wanted to stop by here and meet you before we started bringing her things here to make sure that the space was ready for her and that the key she was given is the right one,” Greg elaborated when Rae stood silent despite the question that had been directed towards her, “She and I will be coming in and out a lot over the next couple hours as we bring her belongings up here. If that’s alright with you, of course.”

“It’s her dorm now too, I guess, so go ahead. I’m actually on my way out of the dorm right now,” Adrienne said as she grabbed her cell phone and keys off of her desk, “but you have the key, so feel free to come and go as you please.”

“Perfect! Thank you, Adrienne. It was nice to meet you,” Greg said as he stepped away from the door of the dorm to allow her to pass by him.

“I guess I’ll see you later then, Adrienne. It was nice to meet you,” Rae mumbled as her new roommate unlocked the door and swung it open.

“Yeah! See ya later,” Adrienne called over her shoulder as she hurriedly walked out of the dorm and shut the door behind her.

“So, you’ve just met your new roommate, Rae. Would you like me to give you a tour of the dorm before be head back to start bringing all of your boxes up here?” Greg asked.

Rae shrugged, still slightly unsure what to make of her first impression of Adrienne, and followed as Greg led Rae to the opposite side of the room where the door that Adrienne had emerged from initially was tucked away in the corner.

“So this will be the door that leads to the bathroom you share with the dorm next door. This is also a co-ed living community, but bathrooms are only shared with people of the same sex, so you and Adrienne will share the bathroom with two other girls. There is a ‘Jack and Jill’ style sink and lots of storage space, but the toilet and shower will be shared between you four girls.”

Rae peered into the open door that Greg was referring to before closing the door and following Greg back to the other side of the room where he stood by the door.

“Now I will take you back downstairs and show you the community study rooms as well as the dorm where you will be able to find your new resident assistant, Dana.”

Rae unlocked the door of the dorm and stepped outside, waiting for Greg as he closed and locked the door behind him before leading the way towards the next stop on the tour of Rae’s new dorm.

***

By midday on Thursday, all four of the girls had managed to pack their belongings and get it all moved into their new dorms, thanks to the help of the other girls as well as their resident assistants; however, none of them were looking forward to parting ways at the end of the evening to return to their new dorms, so Rae, Izzy, and Chloe were trying to find any excuse to spend more time together.

“I can’t believe that because we’ve been so busy with packing and moving all this week that we’ve missed the last three days’ worth of Welcome Week events,” Chloe whined as she grabbed a chip from her plate and took a bite.

Izzy and Rae hummed in agreement as they ate their food as well, allowing Chloe to continue her rant on the topic.

“I mean, I wasn’t very impressed with the Welcome Week Block Party while I was sober, but I really had high hopes for the community pool party, outdoor movie night, and the Welcome Week concert! Even if they were awful too, at least they were all free and we could say that we went!”

“Well, it’s still the beginning of the semester, so I’m sure there will be plenty of other fun events that we can go to together,” Izzy said with a smile to reassure Chloe.

“Yeah, I suppose you’re right, Izz,” Chloe added, “Anyways, I heard that you met your roommate when you and Greg were moving your stuff to your new dorm. What’s she like, Rae?”

Izzy and Chloe shifted their attention towards Rae and the two waited while she finished chewing her bite of food thoughtfully and she tried to decide what her initial impression of her roommate was.

“Well, she was on her way out of the dorm when I got there earlier today, so I think she was in a bit of a hurry, but she seems alright I think,” Rae trailed off as she grabbed a chip from her plate and began to idly twirl it around in the small heap of ketchup on one side of her plate, “her name is Adrienne, I’m pretty sure.”

“Just alright? Did she know that you were going to be her new roommate or did it seem like it was a shock to her?” Chloe asked as she took a drink of her soda.

“She said she knew she’d be sharing a room with someone for a few weeks, but didn’t know much else other than my name. We introduced ourselves before she headed out the door, but she just seemed a bit standoffish, or cold, maybe. I don’t know...I’m sure that she must not be too happy with having to share her room when she was under the impression she’d be living alone, but it is only temporary and it’s not like either of us had a say in the matter,” Rae replied with a shrug before finally taking a bite of the chip that she was holding.

“Well I hope she warms up to you a bit more once you’re actually living together, Rae. I met my roommates yesterday and they are all really quiet, but they seem nice enough, so I guess I’m lucky. I’d hate to think that your new roommate isn’t welcoming towards you, Rae, so if she’s still being rude after a few days, let me know and I’ll beg my roommates to let you sleep on our couch or even on the floor of my bedroom.” Izzy offered.

“Yeah, we want to make sure that you’re happy in your temporary dorm too, so just let Izz or me know if you need a place to crash if things don’t work out with Adrienne,” Chloe added with a sincere smile.

“Thanks girls, I really appreciate it!” Rae said as she leaned over in her chair to give Izzy and Chloe each a hug.

The three girls continued talking at the student dining hall until one of the staff members let them know that the dining hall would be closing shortly.

They took the long way around campus as they walked in the direction of all the student housing buildings on campus, but as they neared the slate gray building that Rae would be living in for the next two weeks, they knew that it was time for them to head in their separate directions.

“Alright, I think this is where I have to leave you two ladies to head to your new dorms,” Rae said with a sad smile as she stopped beside the black metal door that requires a keycard to enter the building.

“Alright, Rae, thank you for coming to dinner with Chlo and I,” Izzy said as she pulled Rae in to a tight hug.

“Have a nice night, Rae! Let Izz and I know if you’re free at all this weekend and maybe we can meet up one last time before classes start on Monday, yeah?” Chloe replied when it was her turn to hug Rae.

“Yeah, of course! I’ll talk to both of you really soon,” Rae finally said as she scanned her ID card at the door and pulled open the heavy door, waving goodbye to her friends as they walked away before stepping through the door.

Rae was not in any hurry to return to the dorm—her new dorm, technically, although the less than warm welcome from her new roommate had left Rae feeling a bit apprehensive—so rather than taking the elevator up to the third floor where her new dorm is located, she decided to take the stairs and prolong the inevitable as much as she could.

When Rae was standing in front of the door to her new dorm, she knew that she had already stalled for long enough, so she pulled the key to the dorm from her backpack and unlocked the door.

As soon as Rae opened the door, she saw her new roommate sitting on her bed on the opposite side of the room. Dressed in a simple black vest top and shorts, the deep olive skin of her arms and legs seemed to stand out even more. When she looked up from the screen of her laptop that was resting on her knees, she stared back at Rae with her green eyes wide in surprise.

“Oh! You startled me,” Adrienne replied as she pulled the white earbuds from her ears and set her laptop aside on her bed.

“Sorry,” Rae mumbled as she set her backpack down on the ground beside the empty desk on her side of the dorm.

“Don’t worry ‘bout it, I’m just used to living alone for almost a week now, so I wasn’t expecting to hear the door open!” She laughed as she climbed down from her lofted bed and walked towards where Rae stood on the other side of the room, “If anything, I owe you an apology.”

“Er, for what?”

“I think I was a bit of a bitch to ya this morning when we first met. They had only let me know I’d be getting a roommate last night, so this morning I had to rush to get everything ready for you so you could have space in the closet and bathroom as well. When we crossed paths earlier, I was running late to meet a friend for lunch and she was getting impatient, so I was a bit frustrated, but I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. So, I’m sorry.”

“Oh, thank you, but you don’t need to apologize. I understand,” Rae replied with a small smile.

“I just wanted to make sure that we start off on a good note if we’re gonna be living together for a while. If you need me to move any of my stuff to give you more room or if you want any help unpacking your stuff, feel free to let me know!”

“I think I’ll be fine unpacking my own boxes, since I don’t have too much stuff, but thank you anyways,” Rae said as she began to stack most of her boxes underneath the lofted bed on her side of the room.

“So, I know your name is Rachel, but you go by ‘Rae’ instead,” Adrienne said as she climbed back onto her bed, allowing her tan legs to dangle over the side of her bed as she sat facing Rae, “but I wanna get to know you a bit more. Tell me more about yourself.”

Rae turned around to face her new roommate and saw that she was waiting patiently for Rae to speak as she shook loose her long, dark brown hair from the top knot it was in and began to braid the hair with expert precision.

“Well, I don’t really know what there is to tell, honestly. I’m not all that interesting,” Rae replied with a shrug as she began arranging her pillows on her new bed.

Adrienne chuckled lightly before beginning to ask Rae questions and answering them herself in return to help the two girls become better acquainted.

***

The next few days were spent unpacking and trying to get settled into her new dorm and get used to the new roommate dynamic with Adrienne, so before Rae even knew it, the weekend was over and she was doing last minute preparations so she would be ready for classes to start the next day.

“So Rae,” Adrienne began as a way of announcing her presence as she walked into their shared room from the door that led to the bathroom, still using her towel to dry her wet hair that was fresh from the shower.

“So Adrienne,” she replied in return as Rae turned around in her desk chair to face her and give Adrienne her undivided attention.

“What’s your class schedule like? I think it’d be smart if we tried to coordinate our schedules so then we aren’t in each other’s way when we’re trying to get ready or whatever.”

“Oh, well I mostly have classes in the late morning and early afternoon.”

“Perfect! I have work early in the mornings on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but other than that, I mostly have afternoon classes,” Adrienne stated as she climbed onto her lofted bed and took a seat on the edge facing Rae, “When do you normally like to shower? As I’m sure you can tell, I’m more of a ‘night shower’ kinda girl.”

“Uh, I don’t really have a preference. I can shower in the mornings, if that is more convenient so we aren’t fighting for time to shower in the evenings.”

“Alright, that sounds good to me! I’m gonna finish binging the show I’ve been watching all summer, so I’m gonna have my earbuds in. If you need me, just throw a pillow at me or something to get my attention.”

Rae agreed with a chuckle and turned back around in her desk chair to face her laptop where she was currently trying to price match the various textbooks her classes required of her this semester.

Why must textbooks be so fucking expensive?

***

Nine in the morning came entirely too soon, but Rae was trying to begin her first semester of Uni on a positive note and even she knew that being late to her first day of classes was not a good idea.

Rae took a shower and got ready for class, impressed with herself that she was on-time or even running a little earlier than she had expected.

I might even have time to treat myself to a “first day of Uni” coffee from one of the shops on campus if I’m done getting ready early enough!

Rae had finished brushing her hair and getting ready in front of the mirror in the shared bathroom and was about to open the door to return to the room she shared with Adrienne when the door opened before she could even touch the handle.

“Oh! Good morning, Adrienne!” Rae said with a smile when she saw her roommate standing in the open doorway, mid-yawn as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes.

“Morning, Rae. You smell really nice,” Adrienne replied as she stepped past Rae and into the bathroom, leaving Rae chuckling slightly at her roommate’s directness when she is still half-asleep.

When Adrienne returned to their shared bedroom, Rae was at her desk trying to pull up the map of campus on her laptop to figure out where her first class of the day was going to be, so Adrienne walked across the room and took a seat on the corner of Rae’s desk that was not currently occupied.

“Are you heading to class right now?” she asked as she brought her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs where they were propped up on the desk to the left of where Rae sat using her laptop.

“Yeah, well sort of...I’m pretty early right now, so I think I’m gonna grab some coffee and then get to class extra early, but I am going to be leaving in a minute or so.”

“Okay, I’ll wait until you’re ready to leave before getting back into my bed, so I can lock the door behind you,” Adrienne replied with a smile.

When Rae was clear on what building she was going to for her first class of the morning, she stood from her desk chair and grabbed her backpack from where it sat on the floor beside her lofted bed.

“Are you leaving now?” Adrienne asked before continuing when Rae gave her an affirmative hum, “Okay, well...have a nice first day of classes, Rae! I’ll see you when I get back from classes tonight, alright?”

“Yeah! Enjoy your classes today, too!” Rae replied as she unlocked the front door of the dorm and stepped outside, allowing Adrienne to close and lock the door behind her after giving her a quick wave goodbye.

***

The queue at the coffee shop was insane, but luckily Rae had left her dorm in enough time to still be early to her Intermediate English Literature lecture course by the time she found the building she was looking for and walked into the lecture hall to find her seat.

Once Rae had gotten settled into a seat, she pulled her cell phone from the outer pocket of her backpack and entered the passcode to unlock it.

It’s been a couple days since I called mum and spoke to my family...

Although she had been texting her mum and Karim often over the past few days while she moved dorms and got settled into her dorm with Adrienne, she had not had a proper conversation with them on the phone since she told her mum about her changing dorms the morning after she had found out for herself and a call felt long overdue.

Rae had also remained in contact with Izzy, Chloe, and Maddie through the group chat that they had created on the day when they had initially moved into the dorm together; however, all four girls were similarly overwhelmed with adjusting to the move and beginning classes, so meeting up and making plans together had not been a priority.

Rae continued scrolling through social media on her phone and sipping her iced coffee to pass the time as more students shuffled into the lecture hall and found their seats.

“Good Morning class! I’m your professor for Intermediate English Lit, Doctor Adams,” a slender, middle-aged man with neatly-trimmed facial hair and graying dark brown hair that seemed to suit him well said from where he stood behind a podium at the front of the lecture hall, “Please take a moment to double-check your schedules and confirm that you are in the correct class and not in my wife’s Beginning English Lit course in the lecture hall on the other side of this building at the same time, since your schedule will likely just list the professor name as ‘Adams’.”

Rae’s first class of the day was primarily spent going over expectations for the course this semester and other important documents relating to the class and the requirements for doing well in the class and before long, she was already heading across campus to her second and final class of the day.

Rae was not as early to this class as she had been for her prior class, so when she stepped inside the large lecture hall, there were only a few scattered seats that were not currently filled.

“Hey, are you here for Intro to Psychology with Doctor Hayes?” A lanky boy carrying a skateboard in his hand asked when he noticed Rae standing near the entrance to the lecture hall.

“Oh, yeah I am, I was just trying to find a place to sit,” Rae replied, earning a thanks from the boy now that he knew he was in the right place.

“Rae? Is that you?” a voice called from a few rows from the back of the lecture hall.

When Rae looked around to see who might be calling her name, she was surprised and relieved to see Archie standing up from his seat and beckoning her over.

“Archie! It’s so good to see you!”

“Yeah, I was thinking the same thing! I’m so glad that I have at least one person that I know in this class already! Do you want to sit with me?”

“Yes, thank you. I just came from another class and I was afraid I wasn’t going to find anywhere to sit!”

“Oh, well I have a long break between this class and the one before it, so I’ll always be here early enough to save you a seat with me, if you’d like!”

“I’d really appreciate that, Archie!”

“So, how have things been lately? Me and the lads tried coming over to your dorm to see if you and the girls wanted to join us for a meal or to go out somewhere a few times this weekend and no one ever seemed to be at the dorm. Then, this morning when I was leaving for class I saw a letter on our door informing us of the hours that they would be doing repairs to the dorm next to us, that way we could plan accordingly.”

“Oh! I suppose I never had the chance to let you know, but there was an issue with the plumbing in our dorm so the girls and I had to move out and we were all split up and placed into temporary dorms with new roommates!”

“Are you serious? That’s terrible, but I guess that makes sense why you lot haven’t been in the dorm lately. When did this happen?”

“We had to officially be cleared out of 113 by Thursday evening, so we had about 2 days’ notice to prepare.”

“Damn,” Archie replied with his eyes raised in shock.

“That’s not even the worst part, Archie. All the other girls got placed into dorms in the same community, but there wasn’t a 4th open bed space, so I was placed into the Northridge Residential Community instead!”

“Are you serious, Rae? That’s complete shit! I know they would have never allowed it, but I wish I could have let you move into one of the empty bed spaces in my dorm!”

“You have empty bed spaces? What did you do in the first week of living on campus that made your roommates run away already?” Rae joked.

“Ha ha, Rae, very funny! I didn’t do anything to scare them off, but the guy I shared a room with before decided he couldn’t pay for living on campus and was able to find a friend of a friend to live with for cheaper, so he left this past weekend. My suitemates are also considering joining student organizations, so depending on if they make it in, they may be moving somewhere else as well.”

“Wow! That’s pretty cool, I guess. At least now you’ll have a lot more space to yourself!”

“Yeah, I suppose. I also spend most of my time not in class with Finn and Chop, so it’s not like I’ll ever be too lonely!”

The pair continued chatting about Rae’s move to the new dorm and her new roommate until their professor walked into the building nearly twenty minutes late, claiming that the traffic was worse than she had anticipated.

After their class had ended, Archie and Rae walked leisurely in the direction of the dorms on campus, since both of them were done with their classes for the day.

“So, Arch, what are you up to on this fine Monday afternoon?” Rae asked as she casually nudged him with her shoulder as she walked.

“I’m meeting Chop and possibly Finn for a late lunch in a couple hours, since they both have classes later in the evening but have a two hour break around the same time. Why do you ask?”

“Do you wanna come see my new dorm and hang out for a bit?”

“Of course, Rae. I’d love to!” Archie said as he began leading them in the direction of the residential community that Rae was now living in.

They took the elevator up to the third floor and Rae unlocked the door to her dorm, holding it open while Archie walked inside.

“My roommate is still in class for a while, so we don’t have to worry about interrupting her or anything,” Rae said with a smile as Archie began looking around the dorm that she shared with Adrienne.

“This dorm is a lot smaller than the other one you girls were in,” Archie mused as he removed his shoes before climbing onto Rae’s lofted bed.

“Oh sure, please make yourself at home,” Rae joked when she noticed Archie sprawled out on her bed as she set her backpack to the side and removed her own shoes, “But yes, this dorm is quite a bit smaller than the other one, but it’s only for a couple weeks or so, which isn’t that big of a deal.”

Archie turned on his side on Rae’s bed and patted the open space beside him, inviting Rae to join him on the bed.

Rae chuckled but climbed onto the bed and settled into the open space anyways.

“So Rae, I bet you think that by up and leaving your dorm next door to me you could escape this conversation, but think again!” When Archie saw the look of confusion on Rae’s face, he continued, “I happen to remember saying that you had some explaining to do after I learned that my childhood best mate had spent the night in the dorm of my female neighbor.”

“Oh, that…” Rae trailed off with a nervous chuckle as she turned away from the intense stare Archie was giving her, “Didn’t Finn already tell you everything that happened? Must we really relive all of that again?”

“Yes, Rae, we must. He told me his version of the story, but I want to hear your version now!”

Rae huffed dramatically and rolled her eyes but continued to recall the events of the night of the Welcome Week block party—or what she could remember, at least—as well as the morning afterwards and what she had managed to piece together from the night before after talking to Finn and the girls the next day.

“And so I’m pretty sure that Greg thought that Finn was doing the walk of shame when he was standing at our door,” Rae concluded with a chuckle at the memory.

“Wasn’t he though? I mean, Finn did have a fun night with a girl that left her hungover and him shirtless and trying to get back into his own dorm the next morning...that sounds pretty ‘walk of shame’-esque to me,” Archie replied smugly.

“Ugh, I don’t even know why I put up with you,” Rae said with a laugh as she jokingly tossed a pillow at Archie’s head.

“Oh? So this is how you want to play, huh? I’d advise you not to start a pillow fight that you have no intention of finishing, Rae!” Archie added with a smirk as he grabbed the pillow she threw at him and tossed back at her.

Rae swatted the pillow away at the last second, sending it falling to the ground beside her lofted bed, shooting a quick glare at Archie and sticking her tongue out at him in triumph.

“Oh, don’t kid yourself, Rae. You know you love me,” Archie said as he propped himself up on the side of the bed where he was laying on to look at Rae more directly, “All jokes aside, how do you feel about the whole situation between you and Finn?”

“There’s a situation between Finn and I? Since when?”

“Uh, pretty much since the two of you spent most of the night drinking and talking together before we all went to the block party as a group and the two of you proceeded to dance with each other and were inseparable until Chop had to nearly pry the two of you apart as we left the block party once it had ended. Stop me if I’m wrong or overstepping my boundaries, but it seems like you might like Finn.”

“Well of course I like him. He’s a pretty cool lad and we have a lot in common,”

“We both know that’s not what I mean, Rae. You don’t have to tell me or talk about it with me if you don’t wanna or if it seems weird since I’m such close friends with him, but—”

“No, it’s not that, Arch. I guess I just...I don’t know how I feel about him yet. I like talking to him and I like spending time with him, but I’m not sure if it’s in a friendly way or as more than friends,”

“You don’t need to make a decision yet, Rae. You can take your time getting to know him and seeing if something more develops from it, you know? Trust me, I’m sure that he would be very willing to spend more time with you and get to know you better as well,”

“What do you mean?”

“Sorry, I’m too good of a friend to be divulging the details of what Finn tells me in confidence, but I can tell you that he likes ya...A lot,”

“Sure he does,”

“Does this look like a face that would lie to you?”

“Do you want me to answer honestly?” Rae joked

Archie gasped in mock offense and flopped onto his back dramatically, throwing an arm over his face.

“Oh, you wound me so, my dear Rae-Rae!”

“Perhaps, yes, but I only do so out of love,” Rae said as she leaned over and gave him a peck on the cheek as she wrapped her arms around him.

Archie returned the embrace but before he could reply, the door to the dorm unlocked and opened and Adrienne walked inside.

“Hey, Rae! I—uh, sorry. Am I interrupting something? Should I leave?” She asked, her hand still on the handle of the door in case she needed to walk out the door quickly.

“Not at all,” Rae replied as she sat up on her bed and Archie did the same.

“How rude of me to not introduce myself! My name is Archie! You must be Rae’s new roommate,” Archie said as he reached his hand out to shake hands with her.

“Nice to meet you, Archie. And yes, I’m Rae’s new roommate, Adrienne,” She replied with a polite smile as she shook his hand.

“I should probably be heading out now, actually, Rae. It was really nice to see your new dorm. I’ll see you again on Wednesday, yeah?”

“Yeah, sounds good to me! Enjoy your late lunch with Chop and the lads. Make sure to tell them I say, ‘hi’,” Rae added with a smile.

“You mean tell Finn you say ‘hi’?”

“No! Well...Not just Finn, but still…”

“Alright, I’m just kidding. I’ll send them your regards. The lads and I have really missed hanging out with you ladies, so maybe we could make plans to meet up soon, yeah? I’ll talk to the lads and be sure to let you know as soon as I can. See you later, Rae-Rae!” Archie said as he pulled Rae into a hug and gave her a peck on the cheek before waving goodbye to Adrienne and leaving the dorm.

“Listen, Rae,” Adrienne began as soon as Archie had closed the door behind him when he left, “I really didn’t mean to walk in on you like this. My class got out earlier than I expected so I just came straight here. If you ever want some privacy or alone time with Archie, just feel free to send me a text and I’ll make myself scarce until you’re okay with me being back here.”

“Wait...do you think that Archie is my—? That we’re...like a couple?”

“Well, it looked like it because you two seemed to be cuddled up pretty close on your bed and he kissed you goodbye. Is he not?”

“Oh, god no! I adore Archie, but alas I am a girl and he is spectacularly gay, so we are doomed to just be close friends,” Rae joked, “he was actually one of my neighbors at my previous dorm and we just became immediate friends!”

“Oh, alright then. I’m sorry that I assumed…”

“Don’t be! I can understand the confusion, but you’re totally fine. No need to apologize!”

“Well, nonetheless, this is a good time to discuss this I guess. If you do ever have a boy over or friends or anyone and you don’t want me to be hanging around, just let me know.”

“Well, I don’t have a boyfriend or anything like that, so you don’t need to worry about that. I’ll be sure to let you know when I plan to have friends over though as a courtesy, and you can feel free to let me know if you are bringing a boy back here or want privacy as well, alright?”

“Of course! Sounds like a plan. And for the record, I don’t have a boyfriend or anything of the sort either, so you won’t see me trying to sneak a boy in here or anything like that,” Adrienne replied with a laugh.

The two spent some time chatting about each of their first days of class and Adrienne eventually ordered a pizza for them to eat while they sat side-by-side on her bed and began watching the new season of a show they found out they were both interested in as they ate together.

@arathewallflower @likeashootingstarfades @eveerez @getawaytrain @pink-royaute @kneekeyta @milllott @i-dream-of-emus @ifinallyknow 

A/N: I know I had to stir up a little drama by making the girls split up, but I’m not totally evil and I couldn’t stand to keep the gang apart for too long, so I brought Archie back into this chapter and more of the gang will also have a presence in the next couple chapters while the drama calms down a bit more. But I can’t make things too good just yet, so there is still some more drama and crazy antics and fun stuff to come in the next chapters.

Speaking of which…I think I’m going to take a more formal break from writing. For the past few months I’ve been posting really inconsistently and struggling to put my ideas into words, so I think with all the stress I have going on in my life at the moment, writing and posting has actually become another source of stress for me and it is no longer the respite and creative outlet for me that it used to be. In all honesty, y’all probably won’t even notice a difference, since I’ll probably still post monthly or occasionally, but I’ve abandoned any hopes of getting these chapters written and posted weekly or on any reasonable schedule.

With that being said, I do have a short story that I’ve been writing off and on since July that is just about ready to post, as soon as I put some finishing touches on it. I’ll stagger post those chapters over the course of a few weeks so then I’m at least posting semi-regularly for a little while; however after that, I will likely go back to seldom posting, depending on if I am able to write or not.

My inbox is always open if you fancy a chat and I’m always lurking and keeping tabs on the goings on in the MMFD fandom, so I’m sure you’ll still get more than your fill of me regardless of whether or not I’m actively posting my writing. Until next time: Stay awesome, my friends! :)

[littlehollyleaf]

my ongoing meltdown over Ed and Isabella’s relationship that I just can’t stop picking at apparently because I’m a glutton for punishment...

Okay I'm tentatively gonna try and open up more discussion on this, because I'm still struggling to get my head around some stuff and really want to understand all angles. Please don't... hate me...?

(also I know this is a sensitive and highly triggering subject for some - I'm tagging everything 'abuse for ts' but if you need me to tag it anything else just let me know)

So, Isabella was abusive when she forced an obviously non-consenting Ed to take part in a scenario in which she presented herself as the girlfriend he killed (aside: killed as a result of abusive behaviour of his own that is), making him re-live the trauma. And I do want to THANK everyone involved in discussions I've been part of already fyi for clarifying that YES 'abuse' IS the accurate descriptor for her actions, since there was and is, I think, a real issue at play here where abuse by women is less recognised than abuse by men and I believe I was blinkered in that regard with Izzy at first (which is an unhappy realisation for me because I thought I was better than that, but there you go).

While Izzy's abuse seems to have been emotionally positive for Ed on the surface (ie. he was smiling and appeared happy with how things turned out in the subsequent scene with Ozzie), it seems fair to argue that it caused deeper, long-term emotional/psychological harm.

Okay?

Now... when Ozzie killed Isabella, as well as being flat out first degree murder and thus non-negotiable as morally wrong (yes?), it caused Ed immediate and obvious emotional/psychological harm, didn't it? And Ozzie went on to take advantage of Ed's emotional vulnerability to become closer to him, both emotionally and physically.

Is that not... also... abusive behaviour? Of a different sort to Izzy's, ofc, but still – Oswald was being controlling and manipulative, as Izzy was when she dressed as Kristen, wasn't he?

Though I have seen arguments that put forward Ozzie as NOT taking advantage of Ed’s grief but simply trying to support Ed through it... but personally I’d need more discussion on that to convince me because since Ozzie was the CAUSE of Ed’s grief I find it difficult not to see moments such as when Ed falls into his arms at the morgue, allowing Ozzie to hug him, as Ozzie carefully and consciously positioning himself in such a way to gain personal benefits from Ed’s situation...

In any case though, even if Ozzie’s behaviour towards Ed can be taken as NOT abusive, surely Eddie is being UNQUESTIONABLY abusive of Oz RIGHT NOW? Forcing him to re-live the trauma of his father's death, making him question his sanity by having him see visions of his dead father and ofc whatever the hell physical trauma he's gonna put Ozzie through in 3.14. The serious and long-term physical/emotional/psychological abuse Oz is suffering and soon to suffer because of Eddie is very clear (yes?).

So... why is Izzy's abusive behaviour so often argued as such an insurmountable problem for her and Ed being a couple, while Ed and Oz's abuse of each other, or at least Ed’s current abuse of Oz... isn't?

Because with Ed and Oz, I am as happy as anyone to run with the kind of interpretations that argue: Oz doesn't have experience in how to love so ofc he did it badly; Ed needs to do this to bring them back to equal footing; they can move beyond this to a better relationship in the future; this is just part of the fucked up way they love each other; etc etc.

But... can't Eddie and Izzy be interpreted in a similar way?

If it’s possible to accept (though ofc NOT CONDONE!!) Ed’s (and Ozzie's) abusive behaviour as part of a wider nygmobblepot relationship, why should Izzy's abusive behaviour with Ed be such a deal-breaker?

There's pages and pages of interpretations of Ed and Oz that work to EXPLAIN and UNDERSTAND their reasons for treating each other badly, with much of the motivation being that they love each other.

Well... Izzy's motivation for abusing Ed was also love, or what she believed was love, so...? Can’t the same kind of sympathy/understanding applied to Ed and Oz also extend to her?

Now when OTHER ARGUMENTS about Ed and Izzy's relationship are included in the criticism then I can see more clearly how it doesn’t compare as favourably to nygmobblepot – eg. the fact she's identical to Kristen and how Ed 'loved' her so fast, plus her obsession with tragic love stories etc. suggests infatuation on both sides more than 'real' romantic love (though there's no reason fans can't ship their relationship as exactly that, is there?).

But it seems to be Izzy's abuse, and only her abuse, that I keep seeing coming up as the key element that utterly invalidates their relationship and so I am... confused as to why, if the same thing doesn't invalidate Ed and Oz's relationship?

Plus all this brings up other questions for me – like, can a relationship include moments where one party is abusive towards the other without the relationship as a whole being abusive? (if so, is this the case with Eddie and Izzy and/or Eddie and Oz? and if so why/why not?) and surely there is a difference between someone exhibiting abusive behaviour and someone being an abuser? (because I fear that Izzy's whole identity is becoming DEFINED by her abuse, whereas Ed’s (and Oz's) abuse is referenced as just one character trait)

And for the record - I myself do in fact interpret Ed and Ozzie's feelings for each other as deeper and more genuine than Ed and Izzy's were for each other. I wouldn't say I ship Ed/Isabella. Although I did enjoy watching their relationship play out and I've made no secret of how I LOVE Izzy's potential as a character and want more in depth exploration of her psyche and story (and for a little while along the way I was musing on the idea of an Eddie/Izzy/Ozzie OT3)... does this make me sick and wrong and an abuse apologist? but doesn't enjoying and analysising nygmobblepot mean I'm helping perpetuate the prioritising (or romantising?) of criminal white men? 

I don't want to downplay or dismiss abuse by women, I agree it's important that is more widely recognised than it is! But I don't want to ignore/excuse abusive behaviour by men either or unfairly demonise female characters as part of analysis of said men, you know?

Basically I don't know what to think anymore *cries*