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leascorner · 8 months

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b.b. | Emergency contact

Summary: “I changed my emergency contact, just so you know.”

Pairing: Bradley Bradshaw x f!reader

Warnings: Angst, mention of multiple accidents, mention of break-up, probably inexact medical and american army facts, deaths, grief, mention of trauma/PTSD, mention of food

Word Count: 4.7k

Author note: y/n = your name; y/s/n = your sister's name. Enjoy!

Masterlist

Maverick saw her first.

Hair all over her face. Cloudy eyes. Blank cheeks. Y/N looked even worse than what he had thought and considering the situation, that was perhaps to be expected. He could only imagine the call she had gotten when maybe she was on her way home after work. The kind of call that just say, “your loved one is at the hospital”. They could be dead already. They could be alive for now, but dead before she’d make it there…

Maverick did not know her personally. He knew, however, who she was and who she had been to Bradley. He had heard what had happened at that time; even if his godson had not gone into much details - he wasn’t exactly one to confide about his love life. Being aware of her story, he felt like this moment would be exactly like any of his own PTSD - reliving your worst nightmare. He had known from the moment the nurse had told him he was not family - Y/N was - that whenever she would show up, he needed to be there for her.

Getting up from the seat in which he had been waiting for some times now, he called out her name. Her eyes scanned the whole room before landing on him. She had never seen him other than in Bradley’s old photobooks, but she recognized him immediately. Though Maverick was now a couple of years older, he looked as in the pictures. It relieved her to see him there; it was partly because he did not look like someone who was going to have to bury his godson any time soon. Of course, it also startled her. The last time she had talked to Bradley, many (many) years ago, his resentment against Maverick was consuming him. She guessed they had finally worked things out.

“We were testing new materials,” Maverick explained as he sat her up in the seat next to his. Though her cheeks were slowly regaining colour, she was still trembling like the leaves of a tree caught in the wind. Perhaps it was being in this ER room again, in the exact same hospital, after all this time. Perhaps it was also the adrenaline wearing off. “Bradley’s jet had an issue and he had to extract. He landed quite roughly though. His left leg is pretty messed up.”

Y/N stayed silent, staring at him, and Maverick let her be. Of course, she had imagined him to be dead. Though she had just heard the contrary, her brain took a couple of seconds to work everything out. “So, he will be alright?”

He nodded slowly and Y/N let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. She was selfishly relieved. She wouldn’t have to decide on the last clothes he would wear. She wouldn’t have to be handed his flag and colors. She wouldn’t have to watch his coffin buried six feet deep. She wouldn’t have to read over and over that stupid phrase written in the marble of this grave. She wouldn’t have to get through this again.

She had done that too much for her own lifetime already.

“Doctor, this is Miss Y/L/N”.

Maverick’s hand on her shoulder made Y/N surface out of her thoughts. She was quick to hop onto her feet and greet the surgeon that had just joined them with a nod. She braced herself for whatever news he had to give - couldn’t be that bad, Bradley was alive after all - and when it didn’t come, she presumed from his look that he was silently waiting for Maverick to go. She understood now that she was the only one listed as his emergency contact.

“He can stay, he is family.”

The surgeon nodded and started to explain in a more complex manner what Maverick had already told her before. Bradley would be immobilised for a couple of weeks, waiting for the bruise in his knee to resolve before he could undergo surgery. After that he would still need to have Physical Therapy before being cleared.

“How long until- how long ‘till he can go back to flying?” Y/N asked, nervously.

“A few months, six at most.” At her side, it was Maverick’s time to let out a shaky breath. He already knew it was going to be difficult to keep Bradley off the tarmac for this long. “He is awake now, if you want to visit.”

After they thanked him, Y/N heard Maverick turning to her - only a few seconds away to say what she assumed to be a “you go first” - and she stayed frozen on her spot, not able to make a move as she finally understood she could be seeing Bradley again – it had never crossed her mind before. There was no way she was facing a very much alive Bradley today. Not today, nor any time soon.

“You go, I’ll handle the paperwork.”

Maverick knew better than to say a thing; he only nodded, thanking her quietly. He knew she would most likely be gone when he would be back. He didn’t blame her though.

This was just a tragic story.

Bradley saw her first.

He had been at the beach near Penny’s bar probably a thousand times since he last spoke to her, all these years ago. Yet, never had he seen her there.

Watching her, sat on an enormous beach towel, watching Henry - or at least he guessed it was Henry - playing in the sand a few feet away, he could only feel guilty for what he had put her through a month ago. The call from the military hospital, the minimal information given, the drive alone, fear clenching her stomach, the parking lot where she could’ve vomited her gut out, the hospital smell. It must have been like reliving her worst nightmare. Except this time there was no tragic ending...

He had changed his emergency contact as soon as the painkiller had permitted him to think straight. To be honest, after all those years, he had forgotten she was even mentioned in his file. They had never been married and therefore had never been officially together for the Navy. He really thought no one was his emergency contact; it only felt natural having no family of his own. No parent. No wife. No kid. Now, he only had his godfather - they had reconnected a couple of years ago.

He was only relieved this had happened when Maverick was here, that someone was able to be by her side and that this time, she didn’t have to live it all alone.

Though he wanted to, Bradley did not go and apologize. He imposed so much on her already. Breaking her heart. Letting her go. Probably scaring the hell out of her. No, he definitely had done enough already.

He was mentally wishing her all the best from afar, ready to turn back to the bar, when the little boy at her side made his heart stopped. One of his tiny fingers was pointing in his direction and it took only what seemed to be a second for Y/N to turn around as well, her eyes landing on him. Against all odds, she waved shyly in his direction, which made Henry - who he had only met when he was still a couple of days old - waved at him as well.

Awkwardly, Bradley waved back and decided that at this point, he couldn’t just turn around and leave. The walk to their spot was pure torture with his messed-up knee for which he had yet to undergo surgery.

“You are the guy in the wedding picture in the hallway,” Henry said once Bradley was to their level. Bradley frowned, not sure what to answer to this. Of course, he understood he was talking about Y/S/N’s wedding, though he didn’t quite understand how this little guy would have recognized him in the hundred guests that must appear on the pictures.

“There is a picture in the hallway,” Y/N simply answered, before explaining to Henry that the polite way to greet someone was to say hello first.

Bradley only nodded, preferring to stay silent as he wasn’t really sure what to say now that he was there.

“How is your knee?”

“Well, could be better, I guess?” Bradley shrugged and Y/N nodded, a serious expression on her face. He hadn’t been in the best of mood due to his injury, and he realized too late this tone wasn’t the friendliest. To make sure she didn’t take it personally, he was quick to continue: “I wanted to say-”

“It’s okay,” She cut him off; she couldn’t be sure what he was thinking, yet she wanted to spare them both the struggle of his thanks. She hadn’t done him a favour running to his side at the first call. In fact, she hadn’t really thought anything, coming running blindly to the hospital as the nurse on the phone told her he had an accident. Maybe it was selfish of her, maybe this time she had thought she could save someone she knew.

“No, I don’t think it really is…” He sighed. “I changed my emergency contact, just so you know.”

“Thanks.”

Some more silence.

Bradley’s hands had become even sweatier, and it wasn’t due to the weather of the first days of spring. This whole situation was literally making him so uncomfortable. It was like walking on eggshell; he didn’t want to break her even more.

“I very am sorry.”

Bradley wasn’t sure what he was really sorry for. This wasn’t just for the scare, last month. It was also for breaking her heart, leaving her the second he had his dream job - like they couldn’t have made it work, not being around when Y/S/N and her husband died in that horrible car crash, him only sending flowers for the funerals, him not calling to make sure Y/N was surviving - how could he have, when he was the one leaving her to live his dream life and she was now the legal guardian of her six-months-old nephew at thirty something.

Y/N only stared at him, trying to see through him like she used to. He was sincere - she knew that much.

“I know.”

It had been a little more than three months when Bradley saw her again.

He had just completed yet another session of physical therapy; though it had been ten weeks since he had surgery and he didn’t need crutches to walk any longer, he still had not recovered the totally of his knee motion. Maverick was driving him twice a week to the military hospital to have PT; with his messed up left knee, Bradley couldn’t drive his manual Bronco.

While he was patiently waiting for the secretary to hung up the phone to get his next appointment scheduled, his eyes landed on a familiar face in the ER waiting room. She was here yet again, eyes puffy and red, breathe short and hair all over the place.

“Y/N?”

Hearing her name, she jumped from her seat, all senses on alert. Her eyes scanned the room urgently before stopping on Bradley. Understanding it was him calling her name, the tears she was holding back started flowing on her cheeks again. His heart started to pound furiously in his chest as the only thought that passed his mind was that something terrible had happened. Again.

“Hey, hey,” he said once he had walked - not so easily - to her. Instinctively, she wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his white T-shirt. She was grabbing him as if he was a lifebuoy. “What happened?”

As her only answer, her body broke into violent sobs. Bradley kept her close, stroking her hair gently, trying to soothe. It took what seemed to be like a couple of minutes for her to at least remember to breath and a couple more for her to be able to speak multiple words in a row. This time, Bradley held her through it all.

“Henry fell down the swing and the school called and- and-” Some more sobs rocked her body and Bradley only held her tighter, heart swelling of seeing her in this state. She must have had the scare of her life. Again.

“It’s okay,” Bradley reassured her. “Is he with a doctor now?”

She nodded, more tears falling down her cheeks. “He has a bad cut on his forehead,” sob, “needed stitches,” sob, “I couldn’t - I couldn’t” stay with him, Bradley understood even if she didn’t finish her sentence. “Shouldn’t see me like that.”

“It’s okay.”

Y/N was still grabbing his T-shirt like she would drown had she ever let go, so he held her a little more, wondering how long she had been in the ER waiting room, clearly in utter panic.

“Breathe with me,” he said. She looked up at him and gently, he dried off her tears. For one split second, he was brought back to that night, what felt like a hundred of years ago. He had promised her everything would be okay. How wrong had he been…

If anything, this was a very bad remake of their break-up.

“He is okay now, more fear than harm.” Y/N nodded, trying to gain back her composure. “You know, somebody told me one day that scars actually made you look pretty badass,” he pointed to his own scars on his chin and cheeks. “It will be a hit with girls and boys for sure.”

“I don’t remember saying that,” she finally smiled. There she is, he thought.

“Miss Y/L/N?” Y/N let go of him to turn to the doctor he understood was taking care of Henry. “We are all done. A nurse is doing his bandage right now. It will need to be redone once a day for a week and we’ll see him again in ten days to remove his stitches.”

Y/N squeezed the hand Bradley didn’t realize she was holding. She was relieved and still, she did not move when the doctor went away.

“You’ve got an automatic, right?” This made Y/N turned back to Bradley in surprise. He had that small smirk on his lips that she could recognize anywhere. The one that he offered when he had a surprise for her. Whatever it was a bath after an extremely long day or to watch Love Actually for the second night in a row when she was on her period. All she had to do back then was to follow his lead, she knew he would take care of her. The truth was, she would have followed him anywhere.

And even after all those years, she still trusted him.

“You do the paperwork, I’ll get him?” Y/N nodded slightly, muttering a quiet thank you. After yet another nod to make sure she was okay, Bradley finally let go of her hand and went to get Henry. On his way, he texted Mav to let him know he did not require a lift up from the hospital anymore. Something had come up, but he’ll explain later.

When Bradley entered the examination room, Henry was sat down on the examination table and a nurse was just finishing to put the last blaster on his forehead.

“Hey buddy!” Henry’s eyes face lifted up seeing Bradley on the doorstep, unfazed it was him rather than her aunt who went to get him. “A little birdie told me ice-cream would make it all better.”

“Bradley!”

Against all will, the ice-cream little “date” had become a recurrent event now. It started ten days later when Henry had his stitches gotten taken out - Y/N asked if she could pick him up after PT to return him the favour. Then, it was a week or so later, for the end of the school year. Then again, on regular occurrence during the summer - sometimes with their friends and family. Some other times, just the three of them.

Today was the first day of the new school year, Henry’s first day of 1st grade. It also was six months now that Bradley had been in contact again with Y/N. Still a couple of weeks until he could get cleared for flying again. A couple of weeks until he would be deployed somewhere on this planet.

And Bradley, picking up Henry from school with ice-cream for celebration, wasn’t really sure how to feel about it; he had decided to elude the matter for now.

“Hey buddy!”

Bradley watched the little guy through his reversing mirror to make sure he was putting his seatbelt on before driving off. He and Y/N had planned to meet up at the beach, once she would have finished work.

On the way there, Henry told him all about Mrs Simpson, his new teacher; how he got lucky to be paired with his best friend, Tom in the class room, and how sure he was that, by Christmas, he would be able to read so they could share reading of his bedtime stories: “You’ll read Daddy Pig’ part and I’ll read Peppa Pig’ part, okay?”

Yes, after all, Bradley definitively did not want to think of his future deployment; he would rather just stay here, in this moment in times.

After taking a swim and perfecting Henry’s swimming techniques (Bradley had taught him how to swim during the summer in between two ice-cream dates), Bradley and Henry were in the middle of sandcastles building contest when Y/N finally arrived.

Bradley sat on the beach towel, Y/N at his side, as Henry excitingly told them about his day and most importantly, all the painting materials they had in his class and that he couldn’t wait to test. The sun was starting to decline in the distance, bathing them in its last warm sunshine. A soft breeze was tenderly blowing his hair. Y/N, with Henry on her knees, was sharing a story of her sister’s first day of ‘big girl’ school and her nephew had a million questions about his mom.

Like every time the subject was brought up in his presence, Bradley tried to add as much details as he remembered of Y/S/N. It was some of his best childhood memories after his dad died: Maverick and his mom making sure his dad’s memory was still alive. He hoped it would be the same for Henry.

“You know what our family tradition was to celebrate the first day of school year?” Henry shook his head no. “Pizza night!”

Bradley laughed as the boy’s face lighted up; he was quick to be on his feet and gather his stuff to get back to the car - it was probably the first time ever Henry would agree to leave the beach without making a fuss.

Y/N helped Bradley to get up - even if he had told her multiple times before that his knee was perfectly fine, she had still treated him as if he would fall down any time. He was attending his last physical therapy sessions by now and he had already started physical training at the base. In a few weeks, he would have to have a medical examination to confirm he could fly again; his accident was well behind him at this point.

Folding the beach towel together, Y/N took this as the opportunity to thank him again for picking up Henry that day.

“My pleasure,” Bradley had assured her.

“Seriously, I owe you big time. I couldn’t see myself putting him in afterschool for his first day.”

For a split second, Bradley saw on her face an expression he knew by heart but couldn’t quite recall what it was; the next second, she was continuing to file her bag with Henry’s beach toys. It took a moment more to Bradley to understand what he had just seen: guilt. The same guilt he had observed in his mom eyes when there were things he asked, and she couldn’t simply offer him as a single mom.

“I don’t know if you are being told that enough but Y/N,” He gently grabbed her wrist to make her stop filling her bag and look back at him. “You are doing more than good with Henry.”

“I am trying my best.”

“And you are doing good,” he assured her again, squeezing her hand in his. Realizing what he had just done, he grimaced slightly but Y/N was quick to reassure him and squeezing his hand in return. “Let’s go.”

Later that afternoon, they were sat down at Pizzeria Luigi, waiting for their pizza. Bradley and Henry were having a funny face contest - Bradley copiously winning despite all the kid’s efforts. Y/N was laughing along with them, the small intimacy moment they shared before was long forgotten.

“That’s a cute family you got there,” the waitress smiled as she put their pizza on the table.

“Oh, we are not-” Bradley started, but was quick to be cut by Y/N saying:

“Thanks!”

While Y/N exchanged a few more banalities with the waitress, Bradley looked at her, utterly touched she would consider him family. He was incredibly lucky she even accepted him in his life again, after how much he had hurt her. On the restaurant terrace, surrounded by the last rays of the summer sun, she looked so happy. When she looked at him with her big sparkly eyes and the biggest smile on her lips, his own heart swelled of happiness.

And he swore he could have kissed her. Right here, right now.

“Henry, can you go wash your hands please? Dinner is almost-” Y/N passed a head through the kitchen door framing, looking what Henry was doing in the entrance corridor. “Bradley?”

“Hi,” he greeted her quietly from the doorstep, Henry by his side the doorknob still in his hand.

Bradley stayed silent, not moving, and his eyes wouldn’t quite meet Y/N’s. It wasn’t uncommon for him to come over - he was more and more these past weeks, but he was usually texting first to confirm he wasn’t imposing on them. Him showing up unannounced, at that time of the night, was odd.

“Your hands, please.” The kid passed in front of her on his way to the bathroom and Y/N waited for him to be gone before turning back to Bradley.

He was looking at a picture hooked up on the hall wall. The picture of his sister’s wedding on which her sister, her husband, Bradley and she were all smiling. It has been taken a few weeks before he was accepted into the academy. A few months before her whole world crashed down. He had walked by a multitude of times before, yet today he couldn’t take his eyes off it.

“Bradley?”

Bradley’s attention finally went back to her, a look on his face Y/N couldn’t quite read. It wasn’t the apologetic look he had worn when he broke up with her. It wasn’t the mask of fury she had seen on his face when he had explained to her one night that his US Naval Academy application had been rejected, by Mav out of all people. It wasn’t either the naturally serious face he would most often wear, nor the sly smirk she had seen on his lips so many times.

His stare was even darker than usual and heavy on her. She couldn’t quite figure out what he wanted to say if he wasn’t using words. One thing she had learned with Bradley was to not rush him and let him come to her.

“We were about to eat, mind to join us?” She asked instead of the millions of questions in her head.

He only nodded, not speaking a word. Y/N took another look at him before heading back to the kitchen.

They stayed silent for a couple of minutes in the kitchen, waiting for Henry to come back from the bathroom. Knowing the kid, with the times he was taking, he was probably making a mess with the soap in there, but none of them went checking on him.

Y/N was watching the vegetables cooking and Bradley was leaned against the kitchen sink unit, deeply in his thoughts, arms crossed over the short-sleeve shirt he still wore even if it was already late October.

“I’ve been cleared.”

Y/N was surprised by the tone of his voice - if there was only one thing for which Bradley was living, it would be flying. “Is that… a bad thing?”

Bradley sighed, passing a hand on his face. He had only received the news about an hour ago and the first thing he had done was to drive to Y/N’s place. He had tried so hard not to think about this moment and what he would do - as if he had any other option than just to follow the orders. Now that the moment had come, it didn’t feel right with him.

“I-” another sigh, “these last months, I just realized what I could have had if-”

If he hadn’t felt like he had to do it on his own.

If he hadn’t been too scared of hurting her.

All those moments he shared with Y/N and Henry over the last few months had made him realized that his own fear - of hurting the people he loved and especially leaving them behind - had prevented him to live some beautiful moments. He had self-sabotaged himself, breaking off with Y/N so he could be sure she wasn’t hurt by his choices - ironically enough. He had shut her off, convincing himself somehow that he was doing the right thing for the both of them - and how wrong had he been, those last few months had proven him.

“Do you remember what you told me when you broke up with me?” Y/N asked suddenly, making Bradley look back at her. He wasn’t exactly sure what he had said besides ‘sorry’ and ‘I love you’. When he thought about that night, he could only remember her tears, her hands grabbing his shirt and not wanting to let go of him. She had fought for them, so hard, but he had already made up his mind.

He shook his head no as Y/N moved closer.

"Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can come together,” Y/N reeled out quietly as if she had re-lived this scene over and over again in her head.

Bradley laughed bitterly, “I overdid myself on that one, didn’t I.”

Y/N wasn’t laughing. She was staring at him, this determined look on her face. Like she had waited for this moment for a while now. “I do think that is true, somehow,” Y/N smiled softly.

She had thought about this a lot over the last few weeks - it wasn’t just only her now, she was also responsible for Henry. It wasn’t her intention falling back in love with him, after Bradley got back in her life. She had been pleased to find in him a friend, a friend that had rekindled a flame inside her with his sly grin and attention. She felt more alive than ever. He made her feel so… whole.

Heart pounding, Bradley watched her intensely. There were unspoken words in the air, words neither of them wanted to stay out loud, too afraid it would break the spell. He knew looking at her now that they were on the same page. He knew he could let go of his fear; whatever life had in store for them would always be worth it.

They could have stayed like this forever. But Y/N couldn’t let her chance pass.

Without warning, she kissed him. If he hadn’t been leaned against the unit, Bradley would have fallen backwards from the feeling of her lips on his, how his hands found her hips by instinct to bring her closer to him, and how he could feel the warmth radiating off her. It was like in his best memories, and just like it had always have been: two puzzle pieces fitting together perfectly.

“What does that mean?” he whispered as he pressed his forehead to hers. He needed her to say it.

“That, perhaps, you could add me back as your emergency contact?”

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rustygem · 7 months

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: ̗̀➛ “DOUBTS.” | v. ratio

彡 prompt: dr. ratio discovers that his lover is more insecure than they let on.

彡 warning(s): self degradation/loathing (from the reader).

彡 notes: gender neutral reader. maybe ooc! ratio. this was partly a vent lmao. all dividers are by cafekitsune!

THE day you started dating Veritas Ratio was the best day of his life. He always considered you to be his equal in intelligence...and good looks too. Your more lenient personality, however, was in contrast to strict personality. But, you still taught your students well.

Granted, to Veritas, you really should be a little less merciful. You’re a professor, it's not like you're teaching preschoolers. If one of your students is stressed out, instead of coddling them, help snap them out of it.

Other than that, you’re a genuinely good professor. As stressed out as some of the students might be, they’re still learning. To Veritas, the way you teach shows that you’re confident in yourself and your teachings.

Although, outside of your job, lately you’ve been acting unusual. Veritas has noticed you hesitating to hold his hand. The way you’ve been kissing his cheeks instead of his lips, your refusal to look him in the eyes when talking to him.

Now Veritas Ratio doesn’t know how to comfort people. And when it came to you, he would give you a hug or a kiss, but that was about it.

Only because your concerns were the usual stress of work, so he wasn’t worried about you. He knew you were strong when it came to being a teacher, and that’s what he loved about you.

He thought to get you a coffee before your next lesson, as you are a hard worker. Of course, hard workers need energy and a relaxing drink. Especially when they’re in the presence of idiots.

So when Veritas hears you crying in your classroom, mumbling the cruelest words to yourself…his heart starts to ache.

Calling yourself a nuisance, nothing but a burden.

He’s damn near offended. If anyone else was caught talking like this about you, he’d have no problem insulting them back.

But…it was you saying these awful things about yourself. Why?

As you spotted him walking towards you, you wiped your eyes with a few tissues.

"Good morning, Veritas." You mumbled a soft 'thank you' as he handed you your coffee cup. You did your best to give him a smile, but you were only met with a glare in response.

"You know I despise lying, my dear." He leaned closer to you, your lips almost touching, as if he was about to kiss you.

“So, why don’t you be truthful?” The man with purple hair moved his head back, drinking his own coffee.

You were silent as you sipped your coffee, tears brimming from your eyes again.

“...I’m sorry, Veritas." Your voice was barely audible, until after you spoke again. “I…just felt like I’ve been of no use to you recently.”

Exhaling from his nose, he frowned. "I’m still failing to see how you could ever view yourself as a nuisance, [F/N]."

Oh, he heard that? Wonderful.

Getting up from your seat, you stared at your coffee cup. “I don’t feel like I’m your equal. That I’m below you.”

What. Were you serious? You were his lover. Of course you were his equal. Were you actually foolish? You were simply one of the most intelligent people he’s ever met, both academically and emotionally. You had a good heart as well. You were an honest person.

How could you speak about yourself this way? Absolutely not. He won’t hear it.

“Answer me this,” Veritas took the coffee cup out of your hand, setting both his and yours cups down on your desk. Staring into your eyes, he continued. “Have I ever told you that you were beneath me?”

“…No.” You mumbled.

“Have I given the impression that you’re bothersome, or a nuisance to me?”

“No, but–”

“Do you think I would be in love with you if I considered you to be worthless?”

No response from you.

Walking closer to you, he grazed your cheek. “So please, tell me where you got these thoughts from, sweetheart.”

Scrunching his eyebrows, Veritas thought for a moment. The first thought that came to his mind made his jaw clench.

“[F/N].” He said firmly, maintaining eye contact with you. “Has anyone said anything to you?”

Taking in his words, you broke eye contact with him. It was true that people talked about you behind your back. But, you’ve been feeling like this for a while…all your co-workers did was just make it worse.

“These thoughts have been sitting in my own mind for a long time, Veritas.” You stared at your shoes. “Nobody needed to say anything.”

Moving your chin up to make you look at him, his gaze softened. “Then let me tell you this.”

Taking your hands in his, he began. “I’m with you because I love you. Simple. You are forever my equal, and I‘be never imagined myself being with anyone but you.”

While his voice was nonchalant as ever, every single word still heartfelt, and came from a place of love.

Seeing your lips almost twitch into a smile, he continued, “Or should I remind you it was me who confessed to you?”

Yeah, that happened. Veritas Ratio told you he loved you. He didn’t expect you to feel the same way, forget starting a relationship with him.

Seeing tears almost well up in your eyes, he kissed your temple. “I love you, [Y/N], and that will never end. Am I understood?”

Nodding your head, you wiped your eyes. “Yes, I understand. I love you too, Veritas.”

With a satisfied hum, the genius reluctantly separated himself from you and picked up his coffee cup.

“Good, now get yourself together, my dear. You have a lesson in 5 minutes.”

#dr ratio x reader #dr ratio fluff #veritas ratio x reader #what if i kiss this man idk

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blacknedsoul-blog · 9 months

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An unnecessarily detailed analysis of Lenore's face when she realizes how gay she is

(Someone thought to tell me that I wrote "incessantly" instead of "unnecessarily" the last time I did this? Didn't they? You people are terrible).

These two vignettes make me crack up. Partly because it's always funny to see Miss "I can pick fights with the Deans, but thinking about my crush makes me nervous UwU" panic, but also because it's impressive how many things have just clicked in Lenore's head at this point.

Like, this girl must be feeling like when you finish a puzzle. A very gay one.

What she knows so far

At this point, as far as Lenore knows, she and Annabel have not seen each other again. There was a goodbye, and she is aware of how much that hurt her. For me, there are two possibilities:

In this flashback, Lenore has realized that she is in love with Annabel, but it is an unrequited affection.

She interprets these feelings as "oh, I'm attracted to her because she was my only friend and she was painfully ripped out of my life. Yes, friends. Very good friends.

Personally, I prefer to interpret it as the second option (you will see why).

On the other hand, it's impossible not to see how willing Annabel is to give and receive affection when it comes to Lenore: in this scene, she tries to say goodbye with a kiss,

And when they're in the closet, she literally throws herself at her.

And I want to point out one thing: Lenore doesn't remember a romantic relationship, but her body seems to: she instinctively strokes her hair when she cuddles her, even though Annabel didn't ask her to. They have done this before. There is a familiarity to this interaction.

Finally. Lenore learned chapters ago that she burned down her house, stole her dead brother's clothes, cut her hair to look more like a man for…something. She doesn't know what yet, but it had to be something important.

And she remembers it when Ada opens her mouth.

(parenthesis: that comment also makes me laugh a lot, like, Ada, dear, if you knew the CRAZY things this woman has done for love).

Please, appreciate this gay panic

If Lenore had any doubt about her feelings for Annabel (assuming option 2), it has been completely erased: she is in love with her. There is no acceptable way to rationalize this as anything else. She was in the past and she definitely is now. That's what draws her to her, that's why she desperately wants to confide in Annabel, that's why her affection seems familiar.

As if that were not enough, Annabel has that ring on her. Not only has Lenore just been hit by the reality of her own feelings, she has just realized that her love is reciprocated, this is not a one-sided crush, they are going to get married. Suddenly, these invasions of her personal space are understood for what they were: an attempt to have a physical relationship on the terms one would have with a romantic partner. Because Annabel was not her friend.

She was her fiancée.

Also, because Lenore is too pure a cinnamon roll for the world, she must be wondering how much she hurt Annabel with this: how she dodged her attempts to show affection, how she doubted her, and, the icing on the cake, that comment:

And all this mental cocoa is perfectly condensed into the expression she has in these two vignettes.

Honestly, the scene is perfect as it is, with no dialogue, but you can almost hear her thinking, "I…I did…I told my fiancée we're friends, blaze".

#nevermore webtoon #annabel lee nevermore #lenore nevermore #white raven #annabel lee whitlock #lenore vandernacht #annabel lee x lenore #lennabel #If this comic were a comedy I see Lenore arriving with a bouquet of peonies and a box of scones #“Sorry baby I forgot about our engagement. Will you marry me again?”#In my heart Annabel wanted to beat her head against the wall when Lenore told her they were “friends”

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lucysgraybird · 7 months

Text

modern!university!coriolanus x fem!reader. part 2 here, part 3 here

notes: this is not set in panem -- if you're looking for a vibe, think harvard/uchicago/any of the old-guard, upper echelon US universities. i have another part in the works that i'll post tomorrow or thursday. also i promise that they both have some crazy in them . It will appear in later parts

“Please remember that I cannot accept late work for this essay,” your professor says as everyone packs up. “The deadline is the deadline for work for the semester, so everything has to be submitted by then. This includes any outstanding work you might have.”

She shoots a look at a boy in the front row when she says that, and he bows his head.

“Have a wonderful weekend, and I'll see you all Monday.”

You shove your laptop in your bag, sling it across your body, and make a beeline for the exit. This is your last class of the day and you have no intention of spending any more time in a lecture hall than you have to. Just as you're about to leave the building, someone catches you by the shoulder and pulls you back.

“Excuse you,” you mutter, turning to see who would do something so…well, to put it diplomatically, bold.

There stands a boy with a shock of hair so blonde it's nearly white and eyes so blue they're nearly translucent. It would be eerie if he didn't wear it well: angular and bright, it's like he's been carved from the purest block of ice. His pale features are offset by the rich ruby of his sweater. He looks royal, though you'd think a prince wouldn't go around grabbing girls by their arms.

“I'm sorry,” he says. “I've been wanting to talk to you for weeks, but you always fly out of the building and I didn't want to miss you this time.”

“Talk to me? About what?”

God willing, not about some group project that had slipped your mind. You're so careful about organization, but sometimes things slip through the cracks.

“Would you like to go out with me?”

“Who are you?”

His eyebrows (the only dark thing on his face) twitch, and you wonder if he's so arrogant as to assume you'd know who he is. He doesn't say anything, though, just extending a hand to you.

“Coriolanus Snow. Pleasure.”

You shake his hand, finding the official-ness of it a little odd. When you open your mouth to introduce yourself, he stops you.

“I realize this is going to sound…odd, but I do know who you are. You're the only person I listen to in that insipid class.”

“Oh.”

Because honestly, what are you supposed to say to that?

“Let me take you to dinner, please,” Coriolanus says. “At least for the conversation.”

Your pause must spur him on, because he continues, “And you're gorgeous. Honestly, you caught my eye before you even started speaking, and then…well.”

He's very forward, but it doesn't come off as desperate. He carries himself with such a confident air that if he hadn't tried to be suave, it would've been more awkward.

You allow yourself to be flattered, offering him a soft laugh. His poise must be a front, at least a little, and you can put up a façade too.

“Why, thank you, Coriolanus. I'd love to go out with you, but I'm so busy with finals coming up…”

This is partly true – you're taking the maximum number of credits your advisor would let you, which is over the credit load the school has set, so you have a good deal of work to do. However, you're not above playing a little hard-to-get, especially if you are interested in the person. Half the fun of a hunt is the chase.

“All the more reason to go out. I know a spot if you're free tonight – one more bit of fun before hitting the books?”

“What kind of fun, Mr. Snow?”

“Well, we'll see where the night takes us, if that's a yes.”

It can't hurt, right?

“It's a yes. I'll text you my address?” You extend your phone to him, a delicate smile gracing your lips.

“Perfect,” he says, putting in his number. “I'll pick you up at 7:30. Wear something nice.”

“Where are we going?”

“A surprise, but it's very classy. You'll love it.”

You can't wait to look this guy up when you get home. “I'm looking forward to it. See you tonight."

“See you tonight.”

—

“Classy” is an unhelpful dress code, you're discovering. It refers to such a range of places, so you're left to take a guess and hope you don't make some sort of grave faux pas. You're limited in being overdressed as a university student, so you select the nicest thing you brought from home. It's a wine-coloured dress that skims just the middle of your calves, with a cowl at the neck and a sweeping back that shows a tasteful (yet tempting, you hope) amount of skin. With a thin necklace and some earrings, you could fit in at most “nice” restaurants that would be appropriate for a first date with a nigh-stranger.

At 7:25, you slip on your coat and heels and head down to the lobby of your apartment building. Something tells you that Coriolanus has a tendency towards extreme punctuality, so you'd rather not keep him waiting a moment.

Just as you suspected, at 7:30 exactly the silhouette of a tall man appears at your door and your phone buzzes with a text.

Coriolanus Snow: I'm here.

When you open the door, he is, indeed, there, holding a bouquet of white roses and wearing a red vest and slacks with a white dress shirt. He is nothing if not coordinated, you suppose.

“Ah,” he says. “Hello. These are for you.”

It is a lovely gesture, and it garners a genuine blush from you while you accept the bouquet. “Thank you. They're gorgeous. I didn't even know they made white roses.”

He offers his elbow to you, which you accept. Though it's odd, there's something sweet about his anachronistic nature. You, like any college girl, have had many a bad first date, and it's pleasant to have one with a man who is, at the least, polite.

“My grandmother grows them. I dropped by and picked these up on my way here. You look wonderful, by the way.”

“Oh! Thank you. I wasn't quite sure what to wear because I don't know where we're going, so I'm glad I chose well.” You glance over at his outfit. “We match, sort of.”

“So we do.”

He smiles in a way that's almost indescribable – it's not quite aloof, though it has some of the same calculation behind it. It actually feels incredibly personal, and sets your heart racing. Why this boy gets under your skin the way he does – the way no one has before – is something you have yet to discover.

Your walk with him ends at a black car, for which he opens the back door and allows you to climb in before following you. A scan of social media earlier had turned up tragically few results, and every single thing Coriolanus does makes you more curious about him. He settles next to you.

“So are you a polisci major, or are you just taking the one class?” You ask, unwilling to let silence be for more than a moment.

“Polisci and philosophy,” he replies. “My goal is law school directly after college, and then politics.”

“I should've guessed,” you say.

“Oh?”

“Not in a bad way. Just…you're very smooth. Well-spoken, attractive, all of that. You'd do well in politics.”

The corners of his lips turn in a slight smile. “You think I'm attractive?”

You laugh. “I certainly do, Coriolanus. I do have standards, you know.”

“Then I'm very glad I'm meeting them. Are you looking to do politics too, then, or…?”

“Honestly, not right now. I think I might stick to academia for a while. I don't have the stomach for pandering that you have to have for politics.”

“It's my least favourite part, honestly. I did some work for a senator last summer and the endless word-parsing drove me insane. No one ever says what they mean.”

“Right. The image of it all is fun, though. Like playing a character. But you don't have to do politics to do that.”

Coriolanus nudges his knee against yours. “Are you putting on an image for me right now?”

“A lady never tells. Are you putting on one for me?”

When you turn, he's a lot closer than you expected. You can see the spires in his irises, like cracked moonstones, and can smell his cologne: whiskey and spice and something woody, clean.

“You'll just have to find out,” he says, his voice low in his chest. It's said as a secret – there's no one else in the car, but it's as though if he says it too loud the leather of the seats might remember. These words were for your ears only, the rumble meant to coast across just your skin, and you shudder.

#coriolanus snow #coriolanus x reader #coryo snow #tom blyth #tom blyth fanfiction #tom blyth x reader #coriolanus x you #coriolanus snow x reader #coriolanus snow smut #coriolanus snow x you #coriolanus snow imagine #coriolanus snow fanfiction #coryo x reader #coryo

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secret-sturniolo · 6 months

Text

first time - matt sturniolo

summary - y/n finally decides she is ready to have sex for the first time, and she couldn't be happier that it is with matt of all people.

warnings - smut, loss of virginity, protected sex

a/n - this was posted on my second account @sturniolodreamz, but i will be slowly moving all my fics to this account in an attempt to merge them.

Matt and I have been dating for about a month now, but we have never done anything more than making out before I stopped it from going further. It was obvious that he knew I was a virgin, and I had never asked him but I assumed he had had sex before at some point. I knew I wanted him to be my first, I trusted him, but I just personally didn't feel ready at the time. But lately, I had been thinking about it a lot, and I decided that I felt as ready as I ever would. I wanted to bring this up to Matt, but I was afraid of it being awkward.

One night, Nick and Chris decided to go to a friends house, but Matt and I decided to stay back at the house and watch a movie together. We were laying in Matt's bed, and he had pulled up a movie on his laptop. We snuggled up under the blanket together and he hit play. I was pretty distracted with my own thoughts, so I wasn't really paying attention that closely to the movie. I kept thinking about having sex with Matt, and the feelings I had that wouldn't go away. I decided I was going to take my chance and talk to him about it. I mean, it was the perfect night, seeing as Nick and Chris would be gone until way later. Matt must have noticed that I was spaced out, because he paused the movie to turn and look at me.

"Hey, you seem lost in thought. Wanna talk about anything?" he asks me gently.

I took in a deep breath before responding. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course." he replies, grabbing my hand to hold it.

"Okay. Have you had sex before?"

He coughed, surprised at the question, but began to answer me.

"I, um, yeah I have a few times. Why, whats up?"

"I just, I've never done anything like that before, but I think I'm ready, Matt."

"Okay," he replies, taking in what I said. "Like, do you want to have sex right now? Chris and Nick won't be home for a while."

I giggled, partly out of nervousness. "Yeah, that's kinda what I was thinking too." I replied.

"Well in that case, we won't be needing this anymore." He says with a laugh, getting up to put the laptop back on his desk.

He walks back over to the bed and sits back down next to me.

"Do you trust me?" he asks me.

"Of course."

With that, he gently pulls me into his lap and places a cautious kiss on my lips. I cup his cheeks in my hands and kiss him back passionately. We begin to make out, something we have done before, but this time there is more passion behind each kiss than I have ever felt. After a few minutes, I begin to feel more confident, and I start to grind down on his lap as we kiss. He moans into my mouth at the feeling, and I can't help but think about how hot he sounded.

"Can you take this off?" I ask him, tugging at his shirt.

Without a word, he sits up slightly so he can slide the t-shirt off of himself.

"Well now it's only fair that you take yours off, too." he smirks.

I felt slightly nervous, but I went with it, leaving me bare on top.

"God, your beautiful, y/n." he reassures me.

I giggle, but it quickly turns into a gasp as Matt flips us over so he is on top. I couldn't help but look down at the bulge that was now forming in his sweatpants. He begins to kiss my breasts, leaving light hickies. As he kisses down my stomach getting closer and closer to my waistband, I feel butterflies start to form in my stomach. When he finally reaches the waistband of my pants, he hooks his finger into it before looking up at me.

"Can I?" he trails off.

I nod at him, giving him permission. I wasn't expecting him to pull down both my pants and my underwear at the same time, leaving me bare as I felt the cool air hit my body. Without any warning, I felt Matt's tongue hit my folds, kitten licking my clit as I arched my back.

"Ah, fuck Matt! That feels so good!"

I felt him hum against me, sending vibrations of pleasure through my body. He continued eating me out until I felt myself getting close.

"Matt, I think I'm gonna cum!" I told him.

"Mhm, cum for me baby." he told me.

Before long, I was literally seeing stars as I had my first orgasm, overwhelmed with pleasure. Matt pulled away soon after, not wanting to overstimulate me. He wiped his mouth before coming up to kiss me again.

"Did that feel good, baby?" he asked me.

"Oh my god Matt, that was incredible!" I replied.

I kissed him again, still catching my breath. My gaze was brought back down to his crotch, thinking about what I wanted to do.

"Matt, will you teach me how to suck your dick?"

"Fuck, how could I say no to that?" he said with a small laugh.

We switched places so he was now the one laying on the bed, with me in between his legs. I began pulling his sweats down, and he lifted his hips to help me out. Once his pants were off, I looked up at him, both for permission and because I was hoping he would tell me what to do next.

"It's okay sweetheart. There's no right or wrong way to do this, just do what feels right and I'll guide you." he reassured me.

"Okay, thank you." I said.

I decided to try and tease him a little. I could see the outline of his boner through his boxers, and I lightly traced my finger down the shaft. When my finger grazed his tip, he bucked his hips up a bit.

"Sorry babe. But fuck, please don't tease me!" he told me.

I listened to him, wanting to make him feel as good as he made me feel.

"Can you take these off?"

Within seconds his underwear was on the floor, and he was bare in front of me. His dick wasn't huge, but in my eyes it was the perfect size. I remembered what he told me, just do what feels right. I started out by kitten licking the tip, tasting his salty precum. Then I began cautiously jerking him, working up the courage to put him in my mouth.

"You got this, sweetheart. You don't have to take it all at once. Just make sure you cover your teeth with your lips." he advised.

I giggled nervously, not wanting to hurt him. I decided it was now or never. I took his advice and covered my teeth so I wouldn't scratch him, and slowly took him into my mouth, jerking what didn't fit.

"Ahh, yeah baby just like that, keep going!" he moaned.

Knowing that I was making him feel good boosted my confidence, and I continued sucking him off. I reached my other hand down and began gently playing with his balls. That must have been the last straw for him, because he stopped me, pulling out of my mouth.

"Fuck y/n that felt so good, but I don't want to cum yet. You did such a good job." he tells me, giving me a kiss that said I love you without actually saying it.

"Do you want to keep going?" he asks me, making sure I was okay.

"Yes Matt, more than anything."

He smiles at me as we reposition once again to where we started off, with me laying on my back. He leans over to his nightstand, grabbing a condom and a small bottle of lube.

"Wow, you came prepared." I tease.

He just blushes and hands me the condom.

"Put this on for me?"

I may be inexperienced, but I do know how to put on a condom. I tear open the condom and roll it on his dick, which was now in front of my face. He positions himself in between my legs.

"I know your still wet, but I'm gonna use lube too. It will help this not hurt so bad." he told me.

That was the first time I had thought about the pain, but I tried to push the thought to the back of my head and just enjoy myself. He squirted some lube on his hand and rubbed it over the condom, getting closer to me.

"Are you ready babe?"

"Yes, but please be gentle!" I said nervously.

He brought his hand up to gently cup my cheek.

"Of course sweetheart. If it's too much, just tell me and we can stop, okay?"

I took a deep breath. "Okay, I'm ready."

He lined himself up to my entrance, keeping his eyes on me as he slowly pushed himself in.

"Ah!" I whimpered, feeling a burn as he stretched me out for the first time.

"I know hon, we're almost there." he told me.

Once he had bottomed out, he paused, letting me relax and get used to him before he began moving. After a short time, I felt ready for him to move.

"Okay, you can start moving."

He began slowly thrusting in and out. He was right, I think the extra lube definitely helped. The pain slowly faded into pleasure as I began to enjoy the feeling more.

"Faster, Matt!" I told him.

He smiled down at me. "Fuck, there's my girl! You're doing so good baby." he said as he picked up the pace.

Every few minutes he would pick up the pace, going impossibly faster and faster. He leaned down to make out with me some more, while still pumping in and out of me at an ungodly pace. I felt myself reaching another orgasm.

"Matt, I'm close!" I warned him.

"Me too baby. Where do you want my cum?" he asks me.

"I want you to cum in my mouth." I told him, wanting to taste him again.

"Fuck! Oh my god..." he trailed off.

After a few more thrusts he pulled out, sliding the condom off. I sit up and stick out my tongue for him to cum on.

"Shit baby you look so hot like that!" He jerked himself a few times before I felt his warm white cum on my tongue. It was the perfect mix between salty and sweet. I looked him in the eyes as I swallowed, showing him my empty tongue.

"That's my girl, y/n! You did so good for me." he praised, flopping down beside me.

"Fuck Matt, that was incredible! Thank you for being so patient with me."

"Of course y/n, I love you so fucking much." he said, kissing me once again.

"I love you too, Matt. Let's go to bed now, yeah?" I asked him.

"Yes, please."

He wrapped his arms around me, and we fell asleep just like that.

#sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #matt sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo x reader #secret sturniolo #sturniolo triplets imagine #sturniolo triplets smut

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elliesbelle · 1 year

Text

nobody compares to you

chapter 8

pairing: ellie x reader

synopsis: you're in your junior year of college and at a party, you run into the girl who broke your heart: ellie williams. despite the time it took to reset your life, will you risk a broken heart again for her?

content warnings: modern college au, cursing, angst, lesbian flirtationship?, mentions of kissing, mentions of a weapon (it's just ellie's switchblade), descriptions of injuries and bruising, abby is hot and cocky (duh), minors do not interact

word count: 4k

chapters: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen

series masterlist

my masterlist

i have a ko-fi if you like my work so much that you feel compelled to tip me ♡︎

the "nobody compares to you" spotify playlist

You’d spent the last few days texting back and forth with Abby. She hadn’t changed much since your freshman year, still confident and charismatic and charming as always.

It was nice, taking a step outside of your comfort zone. It had been a while since you’d regularly socialized with someone other than your usual group of friends. The older you got, it seemed harder to feel comfortable getting close to new people.

But Abby made it easy, keeping things casual and light. She’d ask about your day, talk about hers, and inquire what you were up to. She’d flirt every now and again, and you’d cautiously flirt right back, but she never pushed much further than that.

You hadn’t told anyone yet about reconnecting with Abby. The girls from the Wilson Crew would no doubt be incredibly supportive, having partly seen you going through some of the disastrous aftermath with Ellie. But as loving and encouraging as they were, having six girls simultaneously asking you questions and being loud & abrasive about your love/sex life was too overwhelming a thought.

You considered disclosing your secret to Dina. But though you loved her deeply and she was the closest thing you’ve ever had to a sister, Dina was just a tad bit judgy. She wouldn’t say anything, but after a few years of knowing her and her mannerisms, you’d recognized her pursed lips and her one raised eyebrow as her judgy face. And right now, the last thing you needed was to be evaluated when you’re trying to break from behind the walls you’ve built the past couple of years.

After musing over it for a while, you kick yourself for not realizing right away who it was that you could confide in.

Jesse.

Jesse was an easygoing person, effortless to chat with and always cracking jokes. But when it came down to it, he cared about you and knew how to listen, judgment-free. You used to have long talks with him back in freshman year, separate from Dina and Ellie, while you watched old movies or played video games together. After Rafael died, he made sure constantly that you stayed stable and took care of yourself. He’s never failed to be a great friend to you.

Thursday morning, you make the decision to text Jesse as you get ready to leave for your first morning class.

You let out an audible “uhhh” as you remember that Jesse shared an apartment with Ellie. Jesse seems to suddenly remember as well a few seconds later.

You chuckle as you read Jesse’s last text before putting your phone in your pocket and walking out the front door of your apartment.

“So, you free tomorrow night?” Abby asks.

“Mm, that depends.”

“On?”

“On why you’re asking.” You reply cheekily.

Abby chuckles.

You were making your way to your Race and Sexuality in Popular Culture class and Abby, who supposedly had some time to kill, was walking you over.

“Oh, just curious.” Abby says.

“Uh-huh, just curious.” You reply, rolling your eyes playfully.

You stroll down the brick path holding a large textbook to your chest that you couldn’t stuff into your backpack with the rest of your things. Abby’d offered to carry it for you, but you insisted that you were a “strong and independent woman who didn’t need anyone to carry their books for them,” to which Abby laughed.

“Oh, I’m just fucking around,” Abby continues. “Wanted to see if you wanted to maybe come to this bar with me and my friends. It’s pretty close by.”

“Wow, getting drunk? On a weekday, Miss Anderson?” You joke.

“Friday night counts as a weekend, you weirdo.” Abby chuckles.

“Which bar is it?”

“The Bow and Arrow on Waverly Street.”

You purse your lips at this.

The Bow and Arrow was a lesbian bar that was near the university’s campus. It was a pretty small place with a nice set-up: friendly and welcoming bartenders, TVs that played a variety of movies or that were connected to old consoles for patrons to play retro games on, and a spacious dance floor on the rooftop.

Last year when you were still freshly heartbroken, you’d gone to the Bow and Arrow with a few friends from the Wilson Crew. Somehow, you ended up making out with a random girl in a dark corner who’d been eyeing you all evening. But after they’d asked if you wanted to go home with them, you chickened out and muttered a quick apology before rejoining your friends.

Before then, you’d gone a few times during your freshman year. But after one fateful December night that involved a random stranger, the dance floor, and Ellie, you didn’t frequent it much afterwards.

Abby doesn’t notice your hesitation, which allows you a second to come up with a calculated response.

“Do you mind if I think about it? Tomorrow’s kind of a long day for me. Might be too exhausted after all my classes.” You say.

“Sure, that’s totally fine.” Abby replies. “No pressure at all. If you wanna have a chill night, you could also come over and we can watch a movie or something instead.”

You smile at her thoughtfulness.

“You’re sweet,” You say. “But it’s okay, don’t change your plans ‘cause of me. You should go anyway and have fun with your friends.”

“Still trying to avoid hanging out alone with me, huh?” Abby jokes.

You roll your eyes and smile.

“Yes, that’s exactly why I’m letting you walk me to class today.” You reply sarcastically. “Definitely trying to avoid being around you right now, Anderson.”

“Oh, you’re ‘letting me’ walk you to class, are you?”

“Yup,” You say. “Now leave me, I no longer require your services, Miss Anderson.” You joke, gesturing for her to leave the opposite direction.

“Bossy.” Abby chuckles but continues to walk alongside you.

It’s a slightly chillier day today as October begins to slowly approach November. You’d opted for an oversized sweater that used to belong to your cousin Rafael (it had his alma mater stitched onto the front and your uncle had gifted it to you sometime after his passing), a beanie, and a pair of thick leggings. When you’d met up with Abby, you pretended not to notice her eyeing your ass in your leggings for half a second when she first spotted you.

“Alright,” Abby continues. “How about tonight? You busy?”

“Can’t tonight, sorry.” You say. “Meeting up with a friend.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, just having dinner with my friend Jesse.”

“Oh, Jesse Chang, right?”

You blink at Abby’s recognition.

“Yeah, you know him?”

“Just seen him around and all.” Abby explains. “He’s at the gym sometimes when I’m there. He lives with that friend of yours, Ellie, right? They’re both there together a lot.”

Your face drops at the mention of Ellie, but Abby has her eyes straight ahead and doesn’t catch it.

“Oh, and I see him sometimes playing guitar on the quad.” Abby continues. “He’s pretty good.”

You quickly compose yourself.

“Y-yeah. He’s known to play since he was a kid. A, uh, a family friend taught him growing up.” You say.

You feel a pang in your heart. Joel taught Jesse how to play the guitar when he was younger. Jesse and Ellie.

That summer that you’d spent in Jackson, Ellie’d told Joel during a Miller/Williams dinner night about how you were musically inclined. You’d felt embarrassed but you remember thinking that it was sweet how excited he got. Joel then proceeded to gush all about how he taught Ellie and Jesse how to play the guitar when they were just teenagers.

Jesse’d already known how to play piano from lessons he’d been taking and was curious to branch out (Ellie made a comment that he just wanted to learn because playing guitar looked so much cooler to girls). According to Joel, he had been a good, attentive student. When Ellie found out Joel was teaching Jesse, she competitively insisted on being taught too.

You remember chuckling when Joel’d told you how much of an impatient and temperamental student Ellie turned out to be. She’d easily get frustrated when she forgot a chord and curse herself out when her fingers would slip to play discordantly. But along with her hotheadedness came passion, and Ellie ended up teaching herself quickly into mastering the instrument anyway.

Something inside ached when the memories of Jesse and Ellie casually strumming on their guitars flooded back. You’d watched in admiration as they fucked around and even occasionally wrote songs together. Sometimes you’d sing along to whatever they’d be playing, and they would joke about how they should start a band (to which you’d tease that Ellie didn’t play nice with others to handle being in an organized group).

“That’s nice.” Abby says, interrupting your trance. “You’re pretty close to him?”

“Oh yeah,” You reply. “I’d say he’s one of my closest friends here.”

You quickly feel guilty saying that out loud, knowing that you’d pulled away from both him and Dina the past year.

“That’s pretty sweet,” Abby smiles. “He seems like a really chill guy.”

“He’s the best.” You say, smiling back.

“Well, I won’t get in the way of some bestie bonding then,” Abby says. “But at least consider coming out with us tomorrow night?”

You’re approaching the building of your next class now with just a couple of minutes to spare. You grip your textbook to your chest tightly, almost like it's a source of stress relief. Going out and actually being in public with Abby was a nerve-wracking concept. But you don’t want to disappoint her either.

“I will,” You say. “I promise.”

“Good.” Abby smiles.

“Now, go and get out of here,” You tell her. “You’re gonna be late for your next class.”

“Why are you always so eager to get rid of me?” Abby teases.

You roll your eyes, amused.

“You’re just so sickenly nice to me that I can’t stand to be around you.”

“Get used to it then.” Abby replies.

“Mm,” You muse. “We’ll see.”

Abby chuckles.

“Alright, well, I’ll text you.” She says, waving as she walks off. “See you, pretty girl.”

You feel blood rushing to your cheeks at this flirty comment as you wave her off. Your grip on your textbook loosens before you turn and proceed into the building.

“Another strawberry milkshake? Really?” You ask as the server walks away.

“What?! I’m having a craving!”

You chuckle before taking a sip of your water.

Ever the responsible and reliable friend, Jesse was ten minutes early to the diner for your meet-up. He’d pulled you into one of his classic bear hugs when you came in, and your heart jolted and your eyes teared up. You’ve really missed being around him.

“So, how’ve you been, kid?” He asks, leaning back into his chair and crossing his arms.

“Mm, short or long answer?”

“Long,” He smiles. “I wanna know everything.”

You return his smile uncertainly.

“Don’t really know how to start, Jess.”

“How ‘bout telling me how classes have been going for you?”

You go on for a while about how you’d been handling your schoolwork, Jesse occasionally chiming in about his own classes. He laughed at your anecdotes and asked all the right questions at all the right times. Your orders were placed in front of you as you were complaining about your Women in Classical Antiquity professor who you swore has a vendetta against you.

“Then she looks at me like I’m crazy!” You complain before stuffing your face with a slice of chocolate chip pancake.

“Yeah, a buddy of mine had her last year, and apparently half the shit she was teaching made no sense.” Jesse replies, licking whipped cream off the top of his milkshake.

“It doesn’t!” You exclaim. “Like, I’m sorry that I corrected you in front of the rest of your students, but like? Do your job right the first time then, bitch!”

Jesse guffaws as you pour more maple syrup over your pancakes.

“Dude, she’s gonna fail you for sure if you keep it up.”

“Fail me for knowing more about Greek mythology than she does,” You grumble. “Get me up on that podium, and we’ll all learn something for a change.”

You continue your tirade for a couple of minutes until the conversation shifts from your classes to your friends.

“It’s so cute that they’ve been together since freshman year,” You say, discussing your friends Tara and Astrid who were celebrating their two-year anniversary in a couple of months. “Although I guess to you and D, two years is nothing.”

“Hey, still an impressive feat. And I definitely agree that they’re real cute together.” Jesse replies.

“Nice to know love is real after all.” You joke.

Jesse smiles at this but then suddenly looks thoughtful before speaking.

“How about you, dude?”

“What about me?” You ask, finishing off the last of your pancakes and attacking your side of grits.

“How’s your love life been going?”

You pause. This is exactly why you’d invited Jesse out, to confide in him. And yet somehow, you feel your mouth go dry and your heartbeat rapidly increase.

Jesse notices your hesitation and puts his elbows on the table, resting his chin on his hands.

“We don’t have to talk about it, bud. But I’m here if you need someone. Judgment-free zone.”

You give him a soft smile. Jesse was so perceptive sometimes.

“Well, umm,” You start. “I’m sort of… seeing someone? Or trying to see someone, I guess. Not sure what to call it yet.”

“Oh, yeah? What does ‘trying’ to see someone mean exactly?”

“It means…” You sigh. “…it means I don’t really know what I’m doing or what’s going on or if I want to go further.”

Jesse chuckles.

“Well, what do you want?” He asks.

“I’m not really sure,” You reply honestly. “I guess, I’m a little tired of feeling lonely, and she’s so nice to me. She makes me feel good about myself. I don’t know. I just haven’t actually dated anyone in such a long time.”

“That’s okay. It’s been a rough couple of years for you. I don’t blame you at all.” Jesse says.

You look at him sadly before popping a spoonful of grits into your mouth.

“Well, I don’t think you should completely force yourself into something you’re unsure about,” Jesse says after taking a sip from his milkshake. “But I also think that you deserve to be happy. And unfortunately, that means putting yourself out there.”

You scowl at his sage advice.

“Do I have to?”

“Sorry, kid.” Jesse chuckles and you grimace.

“I just want to see you be yourself again,” Jesse continues. “Whether that’s because you start going out with someone new or because you just leave your apartment more often, it doesn’t matter. Do you think this girl could be good for you?”

You contemplate his question seriously for a few moments.

“Maybe?” You reply, unsure. “She could be. I don’t know.”

“Well, you don’t have to know now,” Jesse says. “Just do what makes you happy, okay? That’s really all I want.”

You feel something warm growing instantaneously in your chest. Gratitude is too small of a word for what you felt towards Jesse, and you make a note to yourself to start hanging out with him more.

“Thanks, Jess. You really are the best.” You say.

“Hey, that almost rhymed.” He jokes.

“Oh my god,” You laugh, rolling your eyes. “You’re so annoying.”

“You’re a poet and you don’t even know it!” He cackles.

You take one of your used, syrup-y paper napkins, ball it up, and toss it at his face. He catches it easily, chortling to himself.

“God, you’re a fucking dork!” You say.

“Don’t be a hater!” He says, holding his hands up defensively.

You giggle.

“I missed you, Jess.” You say.

“Missed you too, kid,” Jesse replies, eyes softening. “You’ve got to come over sometime. I haven’t beaten your ass at Smash in forever!”

You give him a hesitant smile, which he notices.

“Just come over when she’s not there.” He says, accurately assuming the reason behind your reluctance.

“Dude, I don’t know…”

“We’ll do it sometime when she’s not home. It’ll be fine, I promise.” Jesse reassures. “Plus, we haven’t had a jam sesh in forever. I miss my jamming partner.”

You smile, remembering the times when Jesse would convince you to teach him something new on his guitar or have you sing along to a song he’d been learning. He almost roped you into performing at an open mic with him back in freshman year, but you ended up chickening out.

“Don’t you have Ellie for that?” You ask timidly. You find that her name hurts to say out loud.

“She judges me too much for my exquisite and refined music taste,” Jesse complains. “She nearly threw her knife at me for trying to get her to duet a Taylor Swift song with me.”

You laugh, despite yourself.

“Yeah, well, that’s what you get.” You tease.

“Hey! This is a judgment-free zone. No judging my Swiftie habits.”

You roll your eyes playfully.

“Hey, by the way,” Jesse suddenly says. “Who’s the lucky lady?”

“What?”

“The girl that you’re ‘trying’ to see or whatever.”

“Oh. Right.” You say, biting the inside of your cheek. “It’s umm… Abby Anderson.”

You look up to see Jesse with an expression on his face that you don’t fully recognize. His eyebrows are furrowed and it looks as if he was trying to connect the dots about something you weren’t privy to. After several moments, you see what seems like a sudden realization reach his eyes.

“Oh shit, umm.” He starts. “Yeah, she’s pretty cool.”

“What is it, Jesse?” You ask skeptically.

“No, nothing. Just processing.” He replies unconvincingly.

“Jesse,” You press. “What is it?”

“Seriously, it’s nothing.”

“Dude, come on. Don’t bullshit me.” You assert. Jesse sighs.

“That just…That just explains a couple of things, that’s all.”

“What things?”

“I—” Jesse starts but his eyes suddenly wander away from you and towards the front door of the diner. “Oh, fuck.”

You follow the direction of his gaze. You feel your throat close up and your stomach lurch as you recognize the figures of Dina and Ellie entering the restaurant. The instinct you’d developed the past year to suddenly look elsewhere whenever Ellie entered the room vanished completely when your eyes fell on her face.

Ellie was sporting a black eye with a dark gash right underneath. The bruising didn’t look fresh, but you can easily tell it happened recently. Your eyes trail down and see that her right hand is also bandaged.

“Shit.” You hear Jesse mumble, breaking you out of your wildly unravelling thoughts. You turn to face him.

“I’m so sorry, man. I had no idea that they were gonna pass by—” Jesse immediately starts to apologize.

“I-it’s okay, Jess.” You stutter. “I just—”

You fall silent as you glance back towards the pair, your eyes inadvertently meeting Ellie’s ocean green ones. Your faces make the same panicked expression before you both break eye contact to hiss at your respective friends.

“You didn’t tell Dina where we were meeting?” You whisper fervently.

“I told her that we were gonna hang out, but I completely forgot to mention where.” He says apologetically.

“Jesse…” You whine.

“I know, I know. I’m sorry, bud. Do you, uh, want me to go over there and—” His sentence is cut short as Dina approaches your table.

“Hi, babe.” She says, directed at Jesse. “So, what the fuck?”

“Why are you here?” You and Jesse demand simultaneously.

“We ordered takeout and we came to pick it up so we didn’t have to pay delivery fees.” Dina explains. “Jess, why didn’t you tell me—”

“I’m sorry! I didn’t think you were coming out with El!” He says defensively.

“Fucking hell,” Dina says before turning to you. “I’m sorry, honey. Are you okay?”

“I, umm,” You start, your eyes unwittingly wandering back to Ellie. She was standing awkwardly by the host’s podium, bouncing back and forth between her feet and twiddling her fingers. She seems determined to look at nothing else but at her Chuck Taylor sneakers. You shift your gaze back to Dina.

“Y-yeah. I’m okay.” You say weakly.

She smiles sympathetically, putting a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“Is…” You begin timidly. “Is that a black eye? O-on Ellie?”

Dina and Jesse share a worried look.

“Did you tell her anything?” She asks him.

“No, not yet.” He replies.

Dina sighs.

“Tell me what?” You ask, eyebrows furrowing.

Dina’s hand squeezes your shoulder lightly.

“It’s—” She begins. “It’s kind of… private.”

“Oh” is all you say in response. You feel a little rebuffed and excluded, but you decide not to press further. You knew it wasn’t your business. And after all, you were no longer a foursome.

“We’re just gonna grab our food and go, okay?” Dina assures. “I’ll text you later, hun.” She says to you.

“O-okay…” You reply meekly and watch as Dina makes her way back to Ellie.

Neither you nor Jesse says anything. From your peripheral vision, you see Dina and Ellie seemingly argue about something for a few moments before the hostess arrives with a plastic bag of food, which Ellie grabs with her good hand. They leave without another glance back at you.

“Jess, I’m…” You say after a second or two of silence. “I’m gonna go use the bathroom real quick, okay?”

Jesse responds with a simple “okay.” His eyes meet yours with an acknowledgement that you merely need a second to yourself. You nod, silently thanking him for his understanding before making your way to the diner’s bathrooms.

As you shut the door behind you, you lean against it and weep silently.

Why? Why am I here again?

You realize that it hasn’t even been a week since you were in this same, empty diner bathroom, breaking down and crying tears of frustration.

Am I not allowed to catch a fucking break?

You spend a couple of minutes breathing deeply the way your old therapist taught you before you can wrench yourself off from the door and look at yourself in the mirror.

Please, just… please.

Your right hand unwittingly comes up to touch your face, right where Ellie’s injury had been on hers.

What the hell did she get herself into?

Ellie wasn’t inherently a violent person, but she didn’t shy away from it either. She was reckless and impulsive, something about her that you used to love but also dread. A memory starts forming in your head, of you and Ellie and that December night at the Bow and Arrow.

Your reminiscence is suddenly interrupted by your phone buzzing in your pocket. You take it out to see you got a text.

Abby?

You unlock your phone, giggling when you read her message.

She really is so nice to me.

Your heart starts to feel warm before it stops completely upon reading her follow-up texts.

O-oh. Oh, okay.

You gulp and feel a chill going down your spine. You almost feel the need to look around and make sure nobody is watching you, only to remember you were alone in the bathroom. Your phone buzzes with another message.

You chuckle nervously at Abby’s last message.

She’s bold, I’ll give her that.

You chew on your lip for a few moments while one hand grips your phone tightly and the other taps nervously on the bathroom counter. You take a deep breath.

Fuck it.

Remembering Jesse’s advice, you make the decision to put yourself out there again.

Hastily putting your phone back in your pocket before Abby can text back, you feel every nerve in your body tremble. Your heart hammers rapidly in your chest, but you stare at your reflection resolutely.

Abby likes you, okay? I think. And I think I can like her too. This is a chance to be part of something healthy for once.

You stand in front of the mirror, conducting your breathing exercises and attempting to convince yourself.

Back at your table while waiting for your return, Jesse is hastily questioning Dina through text if Abby Anderson was the reason that Frat Guy Adam was nearly beaten to a bloody pulp by the hands of Ellie.

author’s notes:

omg a million years later and i finally update? gasp. now everyone clap for belle (pls clap)

tbh i was too lazy to do all the phone texting parts with the format i did in the past chapters cause i hate having to mess around with the html format for the customized grey text, so my lazy ass just did screenshots of the texts instead, sorry slfkjsddsf

if you recognize the lesbian bar that i loosely based the bow and arrow on, no you didn’t

i’ve been replaying tlou2 lately and i know many of y’all headcanon jesse as a himbo which i honestly love, i’m obsessed with himbo!jesse, but i personally didn’t wanna ignore the fact that jesse’s actually a very intelligent and level-headed guy who’s extremely organized and who’s a natural leader and etc. let’s acknowledge this jesse more!

also jesse’s last name is merely inspired by the last name of the actor who plays him (stephen chang)

also jesse is a musician because i say so. i’m also hcing him as having taken piano lessons as a kid cause which of us asian kids weren’t forced to take piano lessons or whatever when we were kids, let’s be real (i took them briefly but they were boring and i’d already known and i also mostly taught myself anyway)

the part about reader's professor not knowing how to teach her own class is just me being still bitter over a mythology professor who kept trying to fail me cause i knew more about greek mythology than she did (she couldn't cause i was literally correct all the time). the bitch even tried to accuse me of plagiarism! i'm still mad.

i added in the part about ellie not inherently being a violent person as a passive-aggressive reference to craig mazin, the creator of the hbo show, who says that ellie has a violent heart when she does NOT, he does not understand our girl at all

the image i used as abby's selfie is of the body model that they based abby's character on, colleen fotsch!

wow i added waaaay too much in the author’s notes lol sorry belle has adhd everyone

anyway thank you for bearing with me as i take time uploading. replies and reblogs and messages are fuel to new chapters, so pretty please! indulge me!

taglist: @lonelyfooryouonly, @elliesinterlude, @sawaagyapong, @peppesgirl, @iconsoft, @maybeidohaveadhd, @ellieswifee, @valiantllamapersonpony-blog, @nil-eena, @echostinn, @uraesthete, @softbunlvr, @cherriesxinthespring, @amitycat, @thefishymissy, @yevheniiaaaa, @machetegirl109, @bertandfearnie, @ximtiredx, @efam, @elliesnumber1gf, @digit4lslut, @tayyyystan, @emothurman, @livvy-2000, @abigaillovestoread, @gold-dustwomxn, @liabadoobee, @yuckyfucky, @qtefolleunpez, @libr4sonsa, @17luv, @robinismywifee, @villainousbear, @ashlynnnnnnnn15, @scarlettadore, @vianna99, @g0n3girls, @totheblood, @embermdk, @awyunh, @kenz-ee, @marvelwomen-simp, @eleactric, @simpforellie, @omgidksblog, @anxiouso, @nyrastar, @lillysbigwilly, @hopeless-y, @elliesbabygirl, @alexpritch, @thestarsanctuary, @aethelwyneleigh27

#nobody compares to you series #ellie williams #dealer!ellie #ellie x reader #ellie x you #ellie x y/n #the last of us #tlou #the last of us part 2 #tlou2 #ellie fanfiction #belle speaks #belle writes

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rafesapologist · 1 year

Text

the set up — rafe cameron; part eight

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: you've been one of the pogues since childhood, and your loyalty has always lied within your friend group, who is practically your family. when a threat by the name of rafe cameron begins to threaten the pogue's plans, they assign you to gain the trust of the dubious kook and keep an eye on what he's up to. however, now it's been six months since your friends set you up to spy on the kook prince himself, but what you didn't anticipate was to fall head over heels for the boy. your relationship had soon become inviolable shortly after your guys' first exchanges, much to your friends' dismay, and you two became practically inseperable. that was, until rafe discovers the truth.

warnings: swearing, mature themes, angst, sad-ish rafe, smut (minors DO NOT INTERACT, 18+)

author's note: this one is to (hopefully) make up for having to cut the last chapter short due to personal stuff. enjoy my loves

You were pissed at JJ.

Matter of fact, it was much more than that; you loathed him. He was supposed to be your best friend, your confidant, yet he was too caught up within his fit of jealousy to realize that your time with Rafe Cameron was merely an act for the sake of your friends' livelihood. Hell, if anyone knew that it should have been JJ considering he was half of the reason the whole scheme was conspired in the first place.

You wondered what his real problem was and where it came from, considering that he had never treated you like less than until you brought up going to Midsummers with Rafe. From internal dialogue, you demanded answers and to know what had him so affronted. Out of all people, you assumed that he would have your back through the entire plan, however he was doing quite the opposite.

"I can't fucking believe him. I mean - Who does he think he is?" You remonstrated, a scowl tainting your facial features ever so palpably.

"Relax princess," Rafe let out a soft partly suppressed laugh, "how does he have you this riled up in the first place?"

Despite your indignation, you froze at his question. You knew that you couldn't flat out tell him the real reason why you and JJ got into it, for obvious reasons, so what was the next best option? Lie.

"He told me I was spending too much time with Pope and got mad at me." You blurted out before you could actually think about what you were really saying. You avoided eye contact with Rafe in hopes that he wouldn't find any evidence of deception in your expression, opting to completely circumvent his observing gaze by shifting your body away from him while you blankly stared out the car window.

"Pope? I don't think I ever see you with him unless JJ is around too." His brows furrowed.

"I mean I am close with him kind of," you added, "I used to study with him all the time after school, cause he's like a genius or whatever. But it wasn't like that. Pope's too innocent." You shrugged, your words spewing from your lips with little to no thought as your only goal was to steer the boy away from any suspicion of you.

"Are you sure it's nothing more than that?

Your eyes widened in disbelief as your head snapped towards Rafe's direction while he continued to drive, "Are you serious?" You catechized in a state of dubiety.

"Just wondering." The sandy-haired boy stated as though he asked nothing wrong, which only seemed to set you off more on top of your prior situation at hand.

"For your information, no it's not more than that, and two, why do you care?" You folded your arms in your seat as you turned to face Rafe with intent to interrogate him on his unappreciated inquisitiveness.

"Don't ask questions you already know the answer to." He glanced over at you with a suggestive look written on his face and in his eyes that sent shivers down your spine and planted those same old butterflies in your stomach.

"Well, I did ask." You pestered in hopes it would provoke some sort of reaction out of him, which seemed to be easy for you to do.

"I just don't think you deserve to settle for some Pogue dude who can't come close to giving you a real future." Rafe kept his eyes pointed straight ahead onto the road in front of him as he spoke, making you wonder if he just havering or not.

"And what, you can?" You scoffed.

"I would." He declared in a way that implied to you that he was more than sure of himself and what exactly he was promising to you, although it seemed rather delusive and improbable to happen.

"Yeah. I'm sure you tell every girl that." You heaved a displeased sigh to yourself as you slouched back into your seat, refusing to believe that the Rafe Cameron, the Kook Prince himself, would genuinely be the type to go out of his way to make the effort for any woman, unless he was trying to sleep with her.

"You really have no faith in me, pretty girl." Rafe breathed out a half-hearted chuckle at your lack of credence in his word, however he must have taken some amusement in your incredulity judging by the way his continual smirk stayed present on his face.

"Shut up, Cameron. Just take me home."

"I have a better idea, first." He replied, his lips curling up into a suppressed thin-lip smile.

"Great. Now I'm being kidnapped too." You rolled your eyes once more, rubbing your forehead in distress.

"It's not kidnapping if you willingly got in my car, y/n."

"It's kidnapping if you're taking me places I didn't agree to go to!" You protested, flailing your hands in the air at him, which of course only earned you a chuckle on his part.

"Would you rather me take you back to JJ?" Rafe threatened flippantly as the car suddenly pulled into yet another empty parking lot. Typical.

"Would have rathered you take me home but whatever." You mumbled to yourself with your arms still folded over your chest as you peered up from your seat to observe your new surroundings, which deemed foreign to you.

"Rafe- Why are we at another parking lot? You know you're really not clever with your date ide-"

"Just trust me." Rafe shushed as he turned the car off and exited, only to meet you at the passenger side door to open it for you as he had done previously. Sure it was an almost banal thing of him to do, but you had to admit that part of you enjoyed his acts of courtesy.

You remained hesitant with him, however your curiosity was a much greater component in you decision making that had led you to following him anyways. You treaded closely behind him as he headed into the direction of a purportedly seclusive area of a place that appeared to lead to a beach, judging by the way that sand had come into your view. You fumbled through a small patch of dead trees as you made your way to a wide open shore with an absence of debris that beaches you had seen normally had.

"This is where I usually go to get away." Rafe suddenly confessed while he took in the scenic view ahead of him.

"So this is the spot you take all your hookups to. Nice." You nodded with your lips pressed together, confused as to why you were even there in the first place.

"You're so stubborn, you know that?" He rolled his eyes, sighing as he sat down on an individual log that rested in the sand.

"So I've been told."

"Just come sit with me." Rafe gingerly pleaded to you while he combed a hand through his straight locks that displayed blends of wheaty and brown undertones, combining to create a dimensional shade of dirty blond that was unique to his features, "Please?"

You wanted to resist his request initially and continue your usual back-and-forth banter that the two of you always kept up with, however you saw something different in Rafe's eyes when he asked you to sit with him. A new candor that had washed over him that had you obeying his call.

Both of you had sat besides each other for a few minutes, basking in each other's silence as the sounds of the distant waves crashed upon the shore harmoniously. You kept your gaze directly at the view of the ocean ahead, your fingers interlocked under your knees while you sat with your legs up to your chest as you took in the scenery around you. Although your vision was aimed at the oceanfront, you could feel the burning stare of those familiar azure eyes trained onto you, causing your body temperature to rise rapidly.

"I came here a lot when I was younger." Rafe broke the silence abruptly, causing you to snap your head in his direction with your brows furrowed in confusion. "To get away from my parents when they were fighting, and sometimes from Sarah." He continued on, a quiet dry laugh escaping his rosy-pink lips.

"Why did you need to get away from them?" You asked rather lowly, scared to say the wrong thing in such an earnest moment.

The blond sighed deeply in response as his eyes began to scan the area ahead of him intently before he spoke. "They fought a lot, my mom and dad. Sometimes to the point where I thought they were going to kill each other," his nose wrinkled as a display of discomfort, "but I was the oldest so everyone expected me to protect Sarah and Wheezie when things got bad like that, and I did. Every single time. But, what I think they failed to realize was that it was just as uneasy for me to witness as it was them. I didn't wanna see or hear them fight either, but I had no choice. I needed to get away from it at some point, so I started coming here."

Your lips formed into a significant frown as he spoke, taking in his shattering words and that cold look that casted over his face that you knew was only to cover up from the pain he felt reliving the events he was describing. You would have never guessed there was so much hiding beneath that posh demeanor of his, however you felt as though there was more that had yet to be said.

"Did they ever notice when you'd run away like that?" You asked sheepishly.

"Nobody noticed when I was gone. They were only concerned when they needed me for something again." Your heart began to break piece-by-piece as Rafe's revelations had began to unfold slowly. The tragedy in what he was telling you was beginning to make your throat swell as tears threatened your eyes, asking yourself how a family could be so cruel to one of their own, a scenario you were quite familiar with yourself.

"It only ended once they finally got divorced and my mother ran away back to her hometown," Rafe seemed to wince at the statement, scratching the back of his head to mask his reaction, "I never saw or heard from her again after that. Honestly I couldn't tell you if she was alive or dead right now, crazy as it sounds."

You pressed your lips together into a thin line once they began to quiver as you digested Rafe's story. You forced yourself to look away from him and focus your attention to your hands that fiddled in your lap, knowing that if you looked at him any longer you would surely lose your composure.

"Rafe.. I-I'm so sorry." You breathed out quietly, a weakness in your voice that made him turn his head to observe the state that you were in. It was safe to say that he was staring at you once again, considering the intensity of his glare could be felt from miles away, but you refused to look up and reveal to him how much distress the detailed account of his previous life had put you in.

"My experience isn't quite the same as yours, but I understand your pain, Rafe. In a sense, I do." You uttered with your eyes glued to the sand below your feet.

"What do you mean?" Rafe asked, watching you keenly as you spoke.

"My family is pretty fucked up, too. Not in the same exact way as yours may be, but still, fucked." You let out a dry laugh, kicking the sand between your toes away from you, "My mother is verbally abusive and neglectful, and my dad is just, barely ever home. Sometimes I wonder if it's because he's trying to get away from her, although I wouldn't blame him for that, but I needed him many times in my life and he was never there. Plenty of times she was saying these God awful things to me, tearing me down for most of my life, and the one person who was supposed to be there to protect me just... Wasn't." You shook your head as it hung low to the ground, fighting off the urge to cry that overcame you as you recalled the burning memory of your childhood.

"It's not my place to speak on what they went through, but JJ and John B came from homes similar to mine. Absent, hell even abusive if that's what you wanna call it, parents. We basically raised ourselves, I mean we still are essentially. At times I would think that I still don't know any better than that nine year old girl who wondered how she was going to make it in life given the circumstances she was put into. Part of me will always resent my parents for doing this to me." Your voice cracked as you spoke, a queasy feeling building up in your stomach as you basically bared your soul to some boy from Figure Eight.

"Hey," Rafe cooed as he placed his large hand ontop of your thigh, "just because you were dealt with a bad hand growing up doesn't mean you are subjected to a bad life, y/n. They can't determine how far you're going to go, and you'll sure as hell get a lot farther than them I'm sure."

"Rafe," you shooked your head at him as you quickly wiped a single tear that escaped your eye, "I live on the Cut. I'd have to work two jobs to even come close to being comfortable, and even then, it still wouldn't be enough to get by long term. I have to work ten times harder than anyone else on this island because of the situation I was born into, the family I was born into. It'll be a hassle for the rest of my life. I don't get to live in a mansion and own some fancy yacht because my dad has the money, I wasn't given that privilege in life."

Your words wounded Rafe a little bit, as much as he hated to admit, but he knew you had a point and for that he couldn't be mad at you for it. He knew you were at an unfair disadvantage simply because of who your parents were and what little effort they made into giving you a congenial life, and it hurt him knowing you were made to suffer because of other people's foolish mistakes and selfishness.

"You deserve a happy life just as much as anyone else, actually probably even more than most." The blue-eyed boy urged with ardent feelings present in his tone.

"You're just saying that." You rolled your eyes half-heartedly, nudging him softly in disagreement to his statement.

"I'm not, y/n. I mean it, genuinely. You've been through so much and here you are, still so lively and caring. Most people in your shoes would have let their past turn them heartless, but you.. You're infectious and kind despite having gone through hell. I don't think you give yourself enough credit for that." His words were sweet and genuine in a way that had your heart practically melting in his hands, a feeling you had yet to feel so authentically as you did in that moment as you sat there on a vacant beach, staring into the mesmerizing lazuline eyes of Rafe Cameron.

Your lips stayed slightly parted subconsciously as you found yourself getting lost in the current moment that was unfolding between you and the Kook Prince himself, a scene you never would have imagined yourself being in three weeks before. You watched as his pupils widened, his gaze flickering between your eyes and your swollen lips. His free hand ghosted your forearm as it made its way up to your cheek, wiping the reminisce of tears that trailed down your face. You peered up at him coyly, staring back at him through your eyelashes as you gently rested your head into his warm open hand while his thumb slowly caressed the soft skin.

"So beautiful." Rafe whispered under his breath as he looked at you with full admiration that made your legs feel weak. You weren't entirely sure why, perhaps it had been the vulnerability you were subjected to in that moment, but you felt like crying again. This time however, it wasn't from sadness or pain, but relief. A relief that for the first time in your entire life, someone had saw you for who you were and was willing to provide you a safety net for you to let down your walls and fall freely into them. Sure your friends came close to it, but with Rafe it was far different. The feeling was intense and invoked a child-like excitement, even joy, out of you. It made you feel giddy inside, as though you couldn't help but smile in his presence even when he wasn't saying a word.

The scent of a warm spice and musk fragrance invaded your space and filled the air around you, tangling you into an inebriated trance fueled by the essence of desire and impulse. You felt as though you were being taunted by Rafe's refusal to move from the position he was in, yet igniting a flame inside of you by his voluptuary touch. It was clear that he was waiting for your invite despite knowing you had craved his taste once before, but he needed your to confirm that the drive to do so was still lingering inside of you. He watched as you took matters into your own hands and climbed back onto his lap, a seat that had basically become yours after the moment the two of you had in his car.

Unlike the time before, you wanted this moment to be one of undescribable vehement, like you had never been touched properly in your lifetime. Rafe remained silent and kept his eyes glued to you and your figure, holding your hips steady against his waist.

"I know you're going to think I'm crazy for saying this right now, but Rafe," you swallowed hard as you struggled to form a coherent sentence under his stare, "I'm ready for this now."

He chuckled tauntingly, "Ready for what, pretty girl?"

"Don't make me say it." You whined, throwing your head back in aggravation.

"Dunno what you're talking about, angel." Rafe smirked as he shrugged, attempting to act as though he was blissfully unaware to the way that your hips your bucked up against him impatiently.

"I want you, idiot." You rolled your eyes at him, groaning as the tension grew unbearably painful between your thighs as the fabric of his khakis rubbed against you.

"Really? I couldn't tell." The devilish boy formed a smug look across his face as he took notice of your eagerness to get ahold of him. He scanned your frame, noticing the hazy look that had clouded over your normally doe-like eyes. Rafe was a man of great strength, but when it came to you, he was putty in your hands.

"Rafe, do something, please." You begged, unable to fully move your hips as he held onto them firmly, keeping you in place.

"Tell me what you want me to do and I will, princess." He murmured into your ear lowly as his lips ghosted your neck before landing onto the sweet spot he had found on you before, immediately earning a whimper to escape your lips quietly.

"Touch me, anything." You answered vaguely as your impatience consumed you more and more by the second, unable to contain the burning in your core.

"Hmm, where do you want me to touch you?" His voice remained low a husky, enough to make you want to collapse in his arms. You removed your hand from behind his neck and snaked it down to the side of your hip, grabbing one of his wrists and re-positioning it right along the center between your thighs.

Your mouth fell agape as Rafe obeyed your wishes and began moving his fingers up and down your blazing core, adding more pressure as your hips grinded against his long digits. Heat rushed to your cheeks at the realization of what exactly you were doing, except you were far too into it to care about the reality of it afterwards. You found that your desire only increased as he teased you through the fabric of your shorts, agonizingly. Without a second thought, you placed your hand onto of his and laced your fingers together, forcing him to speed up his movements and add even more pressure.

Rafe seemed to have taken note of your demands as he removed his hand and began unbuckling your denim shorts swiftly before sliding his fingers underneath your lace thong briskly. Your head fell back instinctively, soft moans escaping your lips that fueled Rafe's ego proudly. He found himself stuck in a daze as he watched you fall under the spell of his trained fingers as they massaged through your folds hastily, causing you to press your hips against him more as they bucked up against his hands.

Just when you found prodigious pleasure in the way Rafe's fingers felt against you, shock waves coursed through your body like electricity once you felt two of his lengthy digits curl up inside of you. Your eyes rolled back, taking in the bliss that was Rafe Cameron's two fingers thrusting into you at a pace that made your legs feel like jello. Your moans became erratic and uncontrollable as the sandy-haired boy pushed his fingers up further into you, gliding them in and out rapidly as he continuously pressed against your cervix with force.

"Does that feel good, princess?" Rafe mumbled against your collarbone as he kissed along the prominent bone passionately, trying to withhold himself from losing control of his own.

"Don't stop." You whined as you begged him to continue, grinding against his fingers keenly with hopes to feel as much of him as you possible could, a state of euphoria approaching you slowly.

"R-Rafe, I can't take it." You pleaded, wincing as his pace continued to fasten inside of you.

"C'mon angel, you can do it. You're almost there." He coaxed you softly as he sinisterly placed his thumb onto your clit and began unhesitatingly rubbing swift circles against it, sending your mind and body into a frenzy.

You placed your hands onto his shoulders and gripped onto them tightly as you began to reach your peak, your thighs shaking and your legs giving out as the muscles within them began to spasm uncontrollably. A throbbing feeling reached your core as you continued grinding against Rafe's fingers with speed as you chased your high, your moans becoming explicit and noisy.

"Cum on my fingers, baby, it's okay. Let it out." Rafe ushered as he kept up his movements while your body convulsed against him, feeling as rush go through your body as explosions set off within your core region. You felt an immense release as you came undone along his fingers, crying out as you felt an overwhelming amount of pleasure take over your body.

Rafe removed his hand out of you, buttoning your shorts back up and zipping them for you as he pecked your cheek gently.

"Are you okay?" He asked, scanning your features for any sign of pain or distress.

"Mm, yeah I'm good." You wearily hummed as you collapsed into him, burying your face into the crook of his neck while you closed your eyes, taking in the events that had just occured as well as the aftermath of the pleasure that obtained your body.

The hubristic boy chuckled at your state of defeat, "You did good, pretty girl." A small, thin lipped smile formed at the corners of his mouth as he caressed up your hips and thighs slowly, "C'mon I know you're tired, I'll take you home, or wherever. I've gotta head back to my place, anyways."

"Why?" You groaned, not wanting to removing yourself from the daydream you were currently in.

"My dad texted me, said he needs my help tonight." Rafe shrugged.

"Did he say with what?" You asked, reality now coming back to you at the mention of his infamous father.

"Yeah, sort of. He said he needed help moving some cargo onto this ship he owns. I guess it's heavy." Rafe's words came out rather bluntly and plain, as though he was talking about the weather or his weekly schedule. His statement replayed in your head a few times before you sat up and attempted to make sense of what he was talking about.

"Like just random stuff?" You questioned, pining for further answers as the topic sparked your interest and concern.

"Yes and no," he scratched the back of his head, scrunching up his nose as he lowered his voice, "but if I tell you, promise me you won't run back to your Pogue friends and tell them." Rafe asserted with seriousness, staring into your eyes as he held the sides of your arms firmly.

"Okay," you held your hands up in defense, causing his body to relax, "I promise I won't."

"See my dad and I took this trip to the bahamas a while ago, he said it was a business trip and that he wanted me to tag along for whatever reason. Come to find out, as soon as we get there, he tells me about this gold he has hidden and how he wants me to help him ship it to Switzerland so that nobody else can get ahold of it, since it's ours anyway."

Your body froze in place, staring back at Rafe was those horrifying words slipped out of his mouth without a second thought as he found sanctuary within you, despite the lack of longevity in your relationship thus far. You thought about your friends all of the sudden, and your mouth felt dry, knowing that this was exactly what they needed to know and stop before Rafe and his dad could put them in a position where the gold would be out of their reach for good.

You felt an immense pressure with the new information given to you, a burden weighing heavy on your shoulders. Your mind raced as you replayed his statement over and over again, wondering what you should do and who you should tell first, eager to relay the word back to your friends as soon as possible.

"Oh, okay that makes sense." You let out a small, half-hearted laugh, rubbing your upper arm slowly. "But, uh, Rafe?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you just drop me off at the chateau? I think I'm gonna sleep there tonight.

taglist: @ellesalazar, @champomiel, @vadinaleme, @kys4-20, @gills-lounge, @allsmilesreally7, @sublimepenguinpeach-blog, @sp00ky-spr1te, @bibliophilewednesday, @haroldpotterson, @i-love-rafe, @ellesalazar, @calmoistorm, @abundantxadorations, @fals3-g0d, @gillybear17, @oiiviagrande, @hockeybabe87, @augustlikesdeath, @wpdailyminimeta, @palmwinemami, @loxleys-blog, @ikisscline, @flyestvenustrap, @lonelyladyghost, @edance2000,

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron x reader #drew starkey #outer banks #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron x pogue!reader #obx #rafe angst #rafe imagine #rafe cameron smut #rafe smut #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe obx #rafe x reader #rafecameron #obx4

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kagooleo · 8 months

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so with confidence I present my rarepair...fluffyriceshipping!

they were originally a joke ship (which was my last chance to get out) but they grew on me more and more throughout last year, and months later they've become my favorite pair to draw! their name was the funniest thing to make of them because i got to joke around with their jpn names

the tl:dr of them is that there's a lot of good drama to make of thirty-somethings with the weight of responsibility of their respective cultures on their shoulders, as well as their personal thoughts of the trainers of their respective regions, all this culminating together to be really compelling for me to develop, so I'll ramble a Whole lot more under the cut about them :D!!

ok now that the people that wanted to see more about what i'm crazy about when i'm not online are here you guys better prepare for the worddump lmao

before they meet its postgame and they’re both in their thirties (early to mid), lance post gsc/hgss still upholds his champion position and managing the dragon's den alongside any g-man/undercover rocket work on the side (in workaholic mode), riley post dppt is occasionally battling at the battleground but also holing himself up with patrols on iron island and doing egg research and training his aura (Also in workaholic mode)

i'd say all the work makes byron and roark try to get him a break from all that, convincing him at some point to take a vacation! see the sights my guy you've been workin yourself to the bone

it's canonically shown in hgss that riley does appear as a partner for the battle tower, so at some point he is in johto! the region resonates with his cultural sensibilities so maybe he revisits it again to instead actually relax there.

lance would probably catch his hat flying away when he's visiting elm's lab (a fellow egg researcher) in new bark and riley would have absolutely fell first for him (and i'm a sucker for meet-cutes,,,)

and from there they hit it off! being both skilled trainers in their own right they battle and go out to eat after and talk about their family (clair and the elders, for riley's case his family friends byron and roark), their culture (dragon clans and aura guardians), and then when they talk about their respective trainer kiddos (silver and dawn) something clicks between them (it’s a Really rough snippet but hopefully it’s decent)-

"Do you have any kids? I know the news loves to make up some kind of story about secret love affairs with a random person." the guardian says, awkwardly.

Lance smiles, "Oh, yeah! I have one but he's technically not mine." Riley chokes on his iced tea.

"I'm sorry?" A million thoughts roll through his mind as he processes his words said so matter-of-factly.

"Haha, sorry, sorry, I'm only partly joking."

"E-Elaborate..."

The champion explains the general gist of things as he's met him, Silver, his kid-by-odd-circumstance, was homeless for a while, but was training alongside some other up and coming trainers. Uncovering some Rocket related files, he learns he's the son of the boss of the entire organization, and after some on and off meetings he eventually got him a place to stay at the Dragon's Den, and soon after began living with him at his place when he warmed up to the idea of adoption.

There are times he gets overwhelmed with all that he's been through, and some nights its all too much. But Lance was there with him, stayed with him every step of the way, unlike the one who gave him that abandonment anxiety in the first place.

"He's my kid, not by blood, and maybe not by his family, either. But instead, by his own decision he chose to stay with me. I'd want him to keep the freedom he has now." Lance states, firmly. "And now he's grown up as strong as I believed he could. I'm proud of him, as much as he tends to deny that." Riley senses his draconic aura swell with pride, mixed with a humbling sincerity in his words.

"What about you? Any kids of your own?" the sudden flip of the question surprises the guardian briefly.

"N-Nothing adoptive but…I suppose it's similar, in a way to meeting them as you have."

The guardian's turn, now. Dawn was someone he met when he was training on Iron Island, and also served as a guide to get her through the caverns. When he felt something off in the aura surrounding the area, he eventually learned of Galactic causing the pokemon on the island to feel restless and agitated. With her, they were able to clear the island of their antics and even gifted her a Riolu egg on her journey. From there, he was impressed with how strong she was, and did hear from Cynthia that she raised his present up to evolving her into a Lucario. He couldn't have been happier.

That was the case, until he caught the aftermath of the events of Mt. Coronet.

What Cyrus did, the lengths he'd go to, and dragging the both of them into a mess that could have torn the world apart.

After that, Dawn stayed home for a while. Cynthia put him as a contact for her mom, who was really worried for her. With his aura and her friends, Lucas and Barry, they were a big help for her recovery. And eventually, after a lot of time and work, she became the region's champion. She messages every now and then to him, as processing any trauma is never an easy road, but he realized how lucky she was to have the people she'd met to keep her steady, and knew she'll be alright.

"I...still wish I could've done more for her," Riley says, quieter. "Cynthia told me about what happened in that other world, and it...it was a lot for Dawn, a lot of emotions to help her figure out." he finishes, sheepish.

"…I don't blame you for feeling that way, I wouldn't know what to do in a scenario like that, either." the champion says, unsure too.

"It's amazing, in a way. All these kids going through so much on their own. I'd be proud were it not so scary, realizing how young they are to go through what they have been through."

"There's only so much you really can do, as an adult. I've realized that fact a long time ago." Lance's aura felt oddly melancholic, as bright and pretty as it may appear. "It's either immediate or slow when things change for them, and sometimes you'll have to make a choice on the spot when the time comes for them to decide what they want to do." It sounds like he’s speaking from experience, but the melancholy makes it appear that he's had some regrets.

“I trust in them to find their own path, eventually. When they’re together, those kids are gonna be alright on their own.”

His reassurance helped, even if only by a small amount.

I should make some kind of master post about them at some point but WAH god I’m so happy I can actually put them together in pokemon masters, they’ve really grown on me and I’ve developed a lot for the both of them in my free time, but yeah this is the rarepair that’s been on my brain for ages now, a gaze into my goo brain 🤪

#kagarts #pokemon gsc #pokemon hgss #pokemon dppt #trainer riley #stat trainer riley #champion lance #lance pokemon #fluffyriceshipping #🌊🍚🐉#yeah I’m establishing the tag for em in emojis. free reign bitches!!!!!#long post #writing a fic is hard but i could write millions of words about these two. the character analysis is compelling #catch me being annoying about them in the coming months #being able to talk about them is so nice bc I was pretty scared before because of some people I used to know #but now I get to be free and awesome without worry and it’s been great! I’ve got a friend who’s encouraged me to talk about them here #and so I shall! to my friend I want to kiss you on your forehead for hearing me out about these two #new year new yaoi new me >:]

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sansacherie · 1 year

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i know its a fairly popular take that "aemma would hate alicent for calling her grandsons savages" and it seems to stem/be partly influenced from this idea that like viserys, aemma would turn a blind eye to their obvious bastardry. but like, if you actually think about it - the reality is that as soon as it became apparent to her who jace and luke's biological father was, aemma would have stepped in meaning it's unlikely joffrey would have even been born in the first place.

not only like the majority of westeros aemma would have been the practioner of the faith, but she grew up in the vale which i think after the reach/highgarden is the most pious. she would have been raised/conditioned to believe in certain expectations for noble women like her and her daughter. in fact the first and only conversation we see her have with rhaenyra on screen centres around this idea of duty. i'm not saying she wouldn't have felt sympathetic to the pressure rhaenyra was under, but i honestly think some of y'all deluding yourselves if you think she would have tolerated rhaenyra's actions like viserys because it suited him. as i said the reality is as soon as aemma realized the truth, she like most people would have wanted harwin removed from his position and kicked out of the red keep. which brings to my next point. being the kind of place that westeros is, most parents would have seen harwin's affair with their daughter as dishonouring her.

like ultimately i don't really care what aemma arryn would have thought about alicent and or her fighting for her children's claim over her rhaenyra's. i don't really care if she disliked a teenage alicent, even though she would have only known a girl that rhaenyra was close with. if she's the type that would have blamed alicent for going to viserys even though she clearly didn't want to and even then was only kind to him, similar to how viserys has the audacity to blame alicent when he finally clocked that she actually wasn't in love with him, then i guess she's just a bad person like her husband was.

but it's the way y'all treat aemma arryn by automatically assuming she would have supported what rhaenyra and harwin did, and never considering that she idk might have had thoughts and opinions that don't always align with her husband and daughter. what's more, in her limited screen time we actually see her disagreeing with rhaenyra and viserys. she doesn't like rhaenyra flying while she herself is pregnant. she doesn't take viserys' "dream" seriously nor is she confident like him that she will give birth to a son.

#aemma arryn #alicent hightower #house of the dragon #hotd #anti hotd fandom

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kakujis · 1 year

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first meeting! - tabito karasu;

synopsis: karasu thinks ur really cute, but what do u mean u know all his teammates and not him?

wc: 1k

warnings: fem!reader, karasu is a little jealous, like miniscule. not proofread.

a/n: well well well.. my first blue lock drabble and it's karasu?! not kunigami or oliver? eh? anyways, i couldn't get this out of my head! i'm a lil nervous, but i just wanted to humble him rq. i love him loads tho and umm, if this is ooc.. oops.

the first time you meet tabito karasu, he’s sitting in a cafe, sipping on a cup of coffee, watching his best friend flirt with another group of girls. he swivels his cup, staring as he swishes the remnants of his drink before he sets it down.

“there he goes again,” he mumbles, leaning on one hand, staring at the cafe patio. karasu won’t lie, he’s a little bored, but otoya can’t help himself whenever there’s a girl around, even more so when there’s a pack. he does think it’s a little funny to see them swarm him though, asking for autographs or pictures together, as he hears snippets of “i saw your match vs the u-20!”

he wonders how otoya does it, thinking about draining it would be if he had to pretend to be nice to girls he didn’t particularly care about. he’s brought back to earth by the sound of your voice, “more coffee?”

“sure,” he says, eyes still trained on the crowd outside. it’s mostly quiet besides the sound of coffee being poured into his cup.

“oh! its that guy,” you exclaim and karasu finally peels his eyes off of them to look up at you. he blinks, caught off guard for a second. oh.. you’re cute. “otoya eita. he played in the recent blue lock vs u-20 match, right?”

“oh, uh, yep,” he says, but his heart jumps in his chest when you make eye contact with him. he straightens up a little, thinking it’s lame, but for the first time he can’t come up with much to say.

“man, he was so cool! ah, the way he moved down the field was kinda dreamy.” you ramble, setting the kettle down on the table, “oh and um, yo hiori? he was pretty cool too. i don’t really follow soccer but my friends do. did you watch it?”

he waits for you to make a comment about him too, but he’s stumped as you continue to ramble about otoya and the rest of his teammates. the question you ask is the final slap in the face and he wants to be rude, wants to ask if you have eyes, like working eyes, but he bites his tongue. maybe you'll remember if he helps you.

“er, actually, i played in it,” he responds, a nice, easy going smile on his face, “i was pretty important too.” confidence blooms in his chest as he says it. clearly, you’ll remember now, evident by the way your eyes go wide and your mouth hangs open slightly. but that grin is wiped clear off his face when you respond:

“really?” you shrug, “i didn’t notice you.”

karasu can’t find any words to say, his brain short-circuiting partly due to the fact that he thinks you’re the cutest person he’s ever seen and second, that you can remember hiori of all people. he’s slack jawed, with his brow furrowed, as you tilt your head with an audible, “hmm,” as you think.

you shake your head, your fist coming into contact with your open palm, “nope. i’d definitely recognize rin itoshi and yoichi isagi.” you blink, lashes fluttery as you ask, “were you on the bench?”

“nope.”

“were you subbed in?”

“played the entire match.” he says, trying to give another smile, but it’s strained now and there’s a definite vein on his face.

“jersey number?”

“six.”

you shake your head once again, chirping, “nope! doesn’t ring a bell at all.”

in a final act of desperation, he’s about to give you his name, but your manager calls for you before he can. you politely excuse yourself, shouting, “coming!” before you’re grabbing the kettle and scurrying off.

otoya comes back within a few minutes, sitting down, before leaning back and going through his phone. he glances at karasu, who sits there for the second time today, slack jawed and staring; he can’t believe that actually just happened. otoya’s eyes trail over to where he’s looking, it’s you, taking orders and making drinks.

“she’s cute,” he says, “think she’ll give me her number?”

taken out of his trance, karasu grits his teeth, annoyed that that’s the first thing out of otoya’s mouth and, that yeah, you would give him your number.

“didn’t ya just get a ton, outside?” he spits and otoya nods. “so then why’d ya need hers?”

“because she’s a girl.” he replies and karasu sighs.

“whatever, lets get outta here.” he signals for the check and to his dismay and slight delight, it’s you who brings it over.

“hi,” otoya says as you set it down, taking his phone out. “can i have your number?”

karasu rolls his eyes as you giggle out a “sure!”, but the sound gets his heart fluttering. he tries his best not to see you in his peripheral, trying to block out the way you lean down closer to otoya. as he grabs the checkbook, a slip of paper falls out and figuring it’s his copy of the check, he slips it into his pocket. he doesn’t notice the way your mouth curls up a little wider when he does that.

when they’re finished paying, the two walk out, the bell on the door chiming, followed by your “thanks for coming!” otoya wastes no time sending you a text. “jackpot,” he says, before sending some texts to the girls he met earlier.

karasu ignores him, opting to stick his hands in his pockets, feeling the slip of paper. he pulls it out, opening it up, trying to find something of interest, before he stops mid-step. it wasn’t his copy of the check. instead its your number, alongside a note that reads:

hehe. i know who you are, tabito karasu. you played defensive midfield. i wasn’t planning on teasing you like that, but then i would’ve had to admit you were my favorite player that match. btw, your accent is very cute.♡

he glances back at the cafe he was just in with a breathy laugh, scratching the back of his head. otoya tilts his head, asking, “you coming?” but karasu’s head is stuck in the clouds, broken out in full grin.

he’s completely smitten.

#blue lock #blue lock fluff #bllk x reader #bllk fluff #blue lock x reader #karasu tabito #karasu tabito x reader #pibby writing #i feel like u can tell i busted this out in under 6 hours but its ok.

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inchidentally · 7 months

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Lando's eyes always sparkle when he looks at Oscar and it captures my heart every time. You can see that Lando likes Oscar very much and his eyes don't even hide it. God, their relationship is so intimate that sometimes it's hard to watch without feeling like a third wheel. Oscar, I don't know how you did it, but as a Lando fan, I'm grateful that I get to see this version of Lando every time he's around you.

straight up anon, the shift in Lando when he got a teammate who exists on the same natural wavelength as him has been a thing to behold ??

like, Lando is someone who goes through life looking for romance and he so easily gets a crush on anyone who populates his world with something special or beautiful. that's what has made Oscar such a unique relationship for Lando because Oscar doesn't consider himself or his life at all in the world of romance or fantasy. he considers himself extremely practical, "low frequency" and enjoying the simple things in life. he's not at all a typical heroic figure like Carlos or a big camera-ready personality like Daniel. Lando's interest in Oscar has been a slow but steady curiosity that has grown even without Oscar initiating a joint hobby or going on outings together or playing up a bromance for fans. Lando was definitely a little unmoored by the lack of all of that for a while!

the only two aberrations in Oscar's calm and cool are his pursuit of F1 and his fascination with Lando, which we know to have been intertwined as early as him moving to the UK at 14. there is serious romance in the way they ended up as teammates and major drama of Oscar's determination to get that seat.

but! then there's Lando saying how he sees them as similar to each other back in July 2023! bc Lando had always used self-mockery to interrupt his moments of earnestness and in a lot of ways was always striving to be Just A Guy to fit in with the guys in his life. his creativity would pop out very occasionally but mostly he became known for being naturally funny and able to click with just about anyone by matching their energy and adapting to their humor. he even took great pride in The Lando Effect - which ironically was more about Lando changing to suit Carlos and Daniel, who he has almost separate versions of himself with. he was the baby brother as always, wanting to hang out with his older brothers and wanting to fit in.

and then he gets Oscar as a teammate who seems content to just stay back and watch Lando and observe Lando and learn everything about Lando he doesn't already know. who seems to have no limit when it comes to handling the full range of Lando's personality and never tells - or even jokes - that Lando should change a single thing, even when it directly impacts Oscar. Lando doesn't have to match Oscar's energy and it turns out! they both like it best when Lando doesn't try!

which is when we started seeing lando.jpg reemerge and 7 podiums and a new hunger for even more and higher expectations of himself and a calmer, more authentic - less cartoonish - Lando on camera in challenges and social media. he even said how Oscar taught him by example the importance of "keeping calm and being yourself". of course silly, fun Lando is still there! he's still little brother to Carlos and Daniel and George and Alex! but those are now some of the many facets we've gotten to see in the past 14 months!

the winter break was a revelation because Lando spoke to fans solely through his camera lens and the reflections of the beautiful world he saw as he traveled. no goofing, no pretense, no corporate. his chosen pose for all his photos was partly in fun, partly symbolic of his confidence that he didn't need to sell these photos as selfies for them to blow up all over social media.

and all the while Oscar was quietly on his own down time and training, liking Lando's posts and saying "you went everywhere!" and listening to Lando recount it all.

then Lando came back to work this year and everything about him wore a new sheen of beauty and romance to it, including him having grown more beautiful. he's used his beauty more consciously when modeling and even LN4 and Quadrant took on a more stylized look. his new McLaren contract announcement was an entire aesthetic complete with a short film.

like, obv this whole post is me going off on a whole stupid thing but just. Lando was always meant to live his life in a unique way and he was always meant to see things through romance and art and music. he wasn't supposed to apologize for enjoying racing as a means of attaining perfection one day. and there's Oscar who reflects back to Lando all the quirks and things that make Lando unique that he's memorized over the years, listening to Lando's music in place of the usual silence in his own driver's room, helping Lando navigate unknown food and new lengthy words and knowing when Lando is comfortable to take the lead in public speaking and when Lando needs Oscar to step in and handle it. pushing Lando all the time as a teammate and the whole friction creates the pearl analogy.

idk it's just not as huge a leap as I thought last year to say that Oscar's comfortable, placid life has long had a splash of color in it at last in some part because of Lando and that Lando has become the most authentic and brilliant version of himself at least in some part because Oscar is there to always appreciate it.

like this little moment of Lando giving Oscar a nickname and Oscar finding it the best thing he's ever heard and Lando's half-stunned and delighted smile at being able to do that to Oscar is just all of that distilled:

Oscar's confidence has returned and he's smoothing over the awkward PR duties while Lando is relaxed and confident and the little quips like this just come so naturally. (the way Lando actually wriggles in his chair with delight over Oscar's reaction !!) like, Lando doesn't have to try ! he doesn't have to try to be anyone but himself ! there's someone here at work with him all day and every day who is delighted by him no matter what !

and what's even better is apparently! now that they both understand and exist on that wavelength together, they've returned from winter break circling around each other and looking for each other more than they ever have <3

#inchreplies #landoscar #lola alert #inchidentallyanessay #ahhh feels good to do another one of these #I've tried to do it less so no one thinks I'm like living and dying by landoscar interaction afgljfgsjafgl #for reference

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sturniolodreamz · 11 months

Text

first time - matt sturniolo

summary - Y/n finally decides she is ready to have sex for the first time, and she couldn't be happier that it is with Matt of all people.

warnings - smut, loss of virginity, protected sex. if you dont like it, dont read!

a/n - this was my first smut so hopefully yall like it! i also write regularly on my sfw tumblr account, so i am going to try and post at least 1-2x a week on here. please dont hesitate to send me requests, because sometimes it can be hard to come up with them myself. make sure to read the first chapter where i list what i will and will not write. let me know what you think! also, sorry if the ending seemed a little rushed, i didn't really know how i should end it lol

"Hey, you seem lost in thought. Wanna talk about anything?" he asks me gently.

I took in a deep breath before responding. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course." he replies, grabbing my hand to hold it.

"Okay. Have you had sex before?"

He coughed, surprised at the question, but began to answer me.

"I, um, yeah I have a few times. Why, whats up?"

"I just, I've never done anything like that before, but I think I'm ready, Matt."

"Okay," he replies, taking in what I said. "Like, do you want to have sex right now? Chris and Nick won't be home for a while."

I giggled, partly out of nervousness. "Yeah, that's kinda what I was thinking too." I replied.

"Well in that case, we won't be needing this anymore." He says with a laugh, getting up to put the laptop back on his desk.

He walks back over to the bed and sits back down next to me.

"Do you trust me?" he asks me.

"Of course."

"Can you take this off?" I ask him, tugging at his shirt.

Without a word, he sits up slightly so he can slide the t-shirt off of himself.

"Well now it's only fair that you take yours off, too." he smirks.

I felt slightly nervous, but I went with it, leaving me bare on top.

"God, your beautiful, y/n." he reassures me.

"Can I?" he trails off.

"Ah, fuck Matt! That feels so good!"

I felt him hum against me, sending vibrations of pleasure through my body. He continued eating me out until I felt myself getting close.

"Matt, I think I'm gonna cum!" I told him.

"Mhm, cum for me baby." he told me.

"Did that feel good, baby?" he asked me.

"Oh my god Matt, that was incredible!" I replied.

I kissed him again, still catching my breath. My gaze was brought back down to his crotch, thinking about what I wanted to do.

"Matt, will you teach me how to suck your dick?"

"Fuck, how could I say no to that?" he said with a small laugh.

"It's okay sweetheart. There's no right or wrong way to do this, just do what feels right and I'll guide you." he reassured me.

"Okay, thank you." I said.

"Sorry babe. But fuck, please don't tease me!" he told me.

I listened to him, wanting to make him feel as good as he made me feel.

"Can you take these off?"

"You got this, sweetheart. You don't have to take it all at once. Just make sure you cover your teeth with your lips." he advised.

"Ahh, yeah baby just like that, keep going!" he moaned.

"Fuck y/n that felt so good, but I don't want to cum yet. You did such a good job." he tells me, giving me a kiss that said I love you without actually saying it.

"Do you want to keep going?" he asks me, making sure I was okay.

"Yes Matt, more than anything."

He smiles at me as we reposition once again to where we started off, with me laying on my back. He leans over to his nightstand, grabbing a condom and a small bottle of lube.

"Wow, you came prepared." I tease.

He just blushes and hands me the condom.

"Put this on for me?"

I may be inexperienced, but I do know how to put on a condom. I tear open the condom and roll it on his dick, which was now in front of my face. He positions himself in between my legs.

"I know your still wet, but I'm gonna use lube too. It will help this not hurt so bad." he told me.

"Are you ready babe?"

"Yes, but please be gentle!" I said nervously.

He brought his hand up to gently cup my cheek.

"Of course sweetheart. If it's too much, just tell me and we can stop, okay?"

I took a deep breath. "Okay, I'm ready."

He lined himself up to my entrance, keeping his eyes on me as he slowly pushed himself in.

"Ah!" I whimpered, feeling a burn as he stretched me out for the first time.

"I know hon, we're almost there." he told me.

Once he had bottomed out, he paused, letting me relax and get used to him before he began moving. After a short time, I felt ready for him to move.

"Okay, you can start moving."

He began slowly thrusting in and out. He was right, I think the extra lube definitely helped. The pain slowly faded into pleasure as I began to enjoy the feeling more.

"Faster, Matt!" I told him.

He smiled down at me. "Fuck, there's my girl! You're doing so good baby." he said as he picked up the pace.

"Matt, I'm close!" I warned him.

"Me too baby. Where do you want my cum?" he asks me.

"I want you to cum in my mouth." I told him, wanting to taste him again.

"Fuck! Oh my god..." he trailed off.

After a few more thrusts he pulled out, sliding the condom off. I sit up and stick out my tongue for him to cum on.

"That's my girl, y/n! You did so good for me." he praised, flopping down beside me.

"Fuck Matt, that was incredible! Thank you for being so patient with me."

"Of course y/n, I love you so fucking much." he said, kissing me once again.

"I love you too, Matt. Let's go to bed now, yeah?" I asked him.

"Yes, please."

He wrapped his arms around me, and we fell asleep just like that.

#sturniolo triplets #nicolas sturniolo #nick sturniolo #chris sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #matt sturniolo #sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo smut #chris sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x reader #smut

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fromdarzaitoleeza · 9 months

Text

Ahh it's the last day of 2023 already?

I am expecting a call from a friend although the possibility of this happening is very slim it always felt nice to hear the voice of an old friend ( I'm not a text person I've realised this over time but I am stuck to be a text person) .

I can't wait for spring to come in 2024 , spring provides an intense amount of healing to my soul.

The next four months are very crucial in my life if they go well I can survive the rest of the year, I have died a couple of times this year and I am amazed that I am alive i didn't honestly thought i would make it to the end of this year ( especially in the last 3 months , I badly needed help but i didn't wanted others to pity me so i spoke to none about it ) anyways I don't want to talk about it , i don't want to make it sound blue than it already is,a i am really sorry about the fact all my posts are blue I sincerely wish it wasn't that way( altho i haven't posted anything here with as much as devotion I use to do , partly cuz i created an Instagram acc but that's not all reason I ve been sad nonetheless) and sorry for all the "anon/asks" that i haven't answered

I have made no achievements this year and there is little to no progress towards my self love or self growth, but I think that's okay I can do it in the upcoming year, time flies so quick i can't believe Its been so many years since I was 16 I miss being 16 honestly I had more in me back then than i have now , i have lost of confidence my vision and my smile over the years it's as if I am very different person now , i certainly wish I wasn't this way i really thought i would be so much more and better in my early 20s but it is what it is , acceptance is haredest of all emotions in my opinion , you know things are harder to accept when you know you could have done better .

Just like in the last 2 years even this year I didn't make any real life friends with whom I can hang out with i think it's partly due to the fact some people are destined to be alone and I am afraid to admit I am one of them , I did make 2 online friends this year .

I don't want to share any life lessons i learnt this year but if there is something i would love to share is choose yourself one more time each time you feel it's the last time you are doing it , choose one more time to live,one more time to hope, one more time to have faith , one more time to start again [ the fact I am the one telling you this is rediciculosly funny ] .

Unlike most people i don't have a lot of goals for the new year I just got things i want to avoid ( idk if that's the same thing?) Avoid my leftover heart's heartbreak, avoiding what takes away my peace, avoiding what can cause me discomfort, avoiding things that make me question myself ( in any negative way) ,i think that's a little too much but that's it .

As I was writing this Google photos sent me a notification saying " 3 years back today with a photo of mine " and it broke my heart a little, now I am questioning myself how did i let so much happen to me , I wish I treated certain things as the last time instead of always stupidly believing in future ( my worse trait yes).

There is a lot to say as always, i wonder if I open my mouth i would never stop sharing things that go inside my mind , but i also know there is no use of it if i can't find people who can understand it , maybe that's how I end up ranting here .

Not to mention I love people who are patient, i believe in the near future i would only like to talk with people who could be patient with me and with my silence . I believe everyone deserves people who can be patient with them .

Nothing really matters in the end but at the same time everything you do matters ❤️‍🩹

#i was awaken by a dog crying near my apartment and soon other dogs joined him #i am half awake half drowsy

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theharrowing · 10 months

Text

White Lies 🤍 1: Do not, under any circumstances, become emotionally attached to either of these men

Yoongi is everything you could ask for. He is attractive, confident, and smart. And his partner Taehyung is as possessive as he is beautiful. Too bad a relationship would be a major conflict of interest.

You need to have them, at all costs.

🤍 Yoongi x Female Reader x Taehyung

🤍 word count: 2.9k + screencaps of conversations

🤍 college au, cop au, partial social media au with a lot of written story, strangers to lovers & established relationship, yandere, hurt/comfort, smut, fluff, angst, slash, poly, minor character injury & death, graphic violence, nsfw, 21+.

🤍 warnings: no real warnings. we get some pretty forward flirting out of the gate. it might seem like things are already moving very fast, but...we'll see.

🤍 note: ughhhhhhhhhhhh i was going to hold off on actually starting this fic, but the brainrot was real yesterday, and i spent hours on my couch nursing a hangover and making screencaps. i forgot how tedious this is, but i also had a lot of fun. the character Josie is a real person who i adore very much! everyone say hi to Josie!!! this chapter is exposition heavy but i hope you find it fun!

🤍 this is a sequel to Boy Blue! i highly recommend that you start at the beginning

🤍 written parts beta read by @neoneunnajimin

🤍 posted nov. 2023 | read on ao3

PREVIOUS | INDEX | NEXT

Reading through the file that Detective Kim left on your desk, two interesting things pop out at you, the first being that some of the photos of the man called Vante look different than the others. You didn't notice it at first, but upon closer inspection, you realize that photos of him that seem older – ones where he has natural dark brown hair and ones where he has bright red hair – seem personal.

Vante is smiling directly into the camera in these old photos, with an expression that you would describe as being soft – almost loving. His posture is relaxed in each photo, whether sitting at a table at a café or leaning against the side of a car. You wonder if Seokjin took these photos, and if not, how he managed to get his hands on them, because the photos of Vante with blue and blond hair are all surveillance images or those taken from social media profiles that have since been deleted.

The second detail you notice is that in two of the shots where Vante has blue hair, there is a woman with him who shares striking similarities with you. Although you are unable to clearly see her face in the photos, her hair, build, and height all seem to resemble you, and your side profiles are similar to the extent that you wonder if you could convince someone that you are the one pictured with him.

In one of the images containing your doppelgänger, Vante's arm is slung over her shoulder and he is speaking with Min. The three of them are in a crowded bar with what looks like colorful makeup all over their faces, and although you can only see Vante's expression clearly, it seems he is flirting with Min, or at least openly showing an attraction to him.

This detail, paired with Seokjin's not-so-subtle suggestion that you may consider becoming closer than just friends with Min makes you wonder if the two men are an open couple. Especially considering your resemblance to the woman in the photos, you wonder if you were chosen for this mission based on credentials alone, or if your resemblance to someone from their past was partly to blame for your sudden promotion into the Special Investigations Division.

Perhaps it should bother you that you may have advanced partly based on your looks, but this mission is so intriguing that it fills you with excitement to learn more. You wonder if the two of them got married out of love or convenience – a ploy to allow Min to get a work visa and any other benefits that could allow them to more easily escape from whatever they seem to be running from.

Both men are absolutely stunning, and you wonder if that woman pictured ever got to enjoy both of them – together or separately. You wonder what it must have been like for her and where she might be right now. Despite Seokjin's warning not to get close to these two, the urge to know more grows.

How could these two men be so dangerous? What have they done to cause Seokjin to form a super secret, super tight task force to hunt them down? And why is he unwilling to just tail Min and confront Vante, himself?

Quickly, you fire off an email to Min, asking about his tutoring services, posing as a student named Sandra. Then you return to rereading their files and memorizing their faces. Min with his somewhat sleepy, somewhat grumpy expressions that brighten into something soft and inviting when he smiles. Vante with his rectangular smile and piercing eyes that either hide all emotion or express so much that he appears positively captivating.

You read and reread the bullet point list describing these men in an attempt to piece together what kind of people they must present themselves as. You wonder who assisted with creating their profiles, and whether it may have been old friends or even the woman who resembles you.

Both men are dishonest and extremely disloyal; both exhibit an unshakable poker face that even those close to them cannot read.

[Redacted][Code name Min] is soft-spoken and an interesting mix of contemplative and impulsive; does not take no for an answer. [Redacted][Code name Vante] exhibits similar traits but is much more forward and promiscuous, willing to use sex as a weapon.

Both men get what they want with little to no concern for the outcome, even if it means the death or displacement of others.

Both men only seem loyal to one another, but that may also be a façade. [Redacted][Code name Vante] may be the more volatile of the two, should one turn on the other, but it is likely that [Redacted][Code name Min] has a mean streak that few have witnessed firsthand.

[Redacted][Code name Vante] is cold and calculating; always ten steps ahead.

[Redacted][Code name Vante]'s family is well-connected and seem willing to cover up anything he does.

Is it likely that [Redacted][Code name Vante] is the mastermind of all of their schemes and that [Redacted][Code name Min] tags along for one reason or another.

It is possible that [Redacted][Code name Min] has insecurities that [Redacted][Code name Vante] easily controls and manipulates.

Your phone lights up with a notification, pulling you from the paperwork and surprising you with how quickly Min has gotten back to you about tutoring services. And as you open the notification, you realize your seemingly easy mission might just be a little more complicated than you hoped.

Undeterred, you begin to improvise. If Vante uses sex as a weapon, perhaps you can create several Tinder and Hinge accounts and attempt to find him online. One benefit to going undercover is having access to a seemingly endless supply of burner phones.

You have absolutely no doubt that someone like Vante is using hookup apps if his profile depicts him accurately. If he and Min are married for love over convenience, there is a strong chance that he is still willing to be unfaithful. Or, perhaps the two of them are not monogamous, and finding one of them on a hookup app will likely be due to one or both of them looking for a good time.

The prospect of getting to know them this way is risky since they are both gorgeous and apparently too cunning to resist, but it may be faster than waiting a month or more for Min's private lessons to open.

Swiping on dating apps is tedious work, and you almost feel guilty for spending your precious hours this way. Despite it being the weekend, you are paid for your time, and right now your time is spent scouring dating profiles looking for one man.

You swipe with one hand and brush your teeth with the other, eyes barely open and still heavy with sleep. You swipe as soon as you step on line for your favorite macchiato at your favorite little café two blocks from your Chelsea apartment, and you swipe as you sit in your favorite window seat, sipping on the perfectly bittersweet warm drink while the morning sun warms your cheeks.

As you reread the file on Min and Vante over lunch, you take breaks to swipe, and you even find yourself genuinely reading through some Tinder profiles before snapping out of it and ridding yourself of distraction. Sure, you may be single and somewhat curious to mingle, but something tells you that you are going to have your hands absolutely full once you manage to get ahold of one of these men, so adding another person to the equation feels too messy.

Later on, when your best friend Josie convinces you to leave the house because it is Saturday and you need to, as she says, "Unwind and find some cuties to dick you down," you swipe in the cab ride over and resist the urge to swipe while waiting on line for drinks at the bar.

Part of you wonders whether you could run into Min at a place like this. Bright neon lights filling the space with college students scantily clad and alcohol buzzing through them, turning them into horny little monsters. If he is professional – or upholding a façade of professionalism for the sake of his current persona – then it is likely he would not be caught dead in a place like this. You are somewhat certain that Vante likely scours these types of clubs, but alas, he is in Milan.

Some of the photos of Min from their file show him on stage with a band, playing keyboard with a guitar slung over his shoulder, with a face full of glitter and makeup. The vibe of that bar differs from this one, but the rambunctious energy is more similar to what you observe in recent surveillance footage photos. You wonder if any part of that man bleeds through now, or if he only indulges in classically accepted forms of music as a tutor.

Min must be good with his hands – a thought that spirals the more your mind is allowed to wander back to the photos of him playing two very different instruments at once. You need to stop thinking about the beautiful, dangerous men – monsters, as Seokjin put it – and focus on being out with your best friend.

Josie is a bubbly ray of sunlight with a matching warm smile. Purple braids cascade over her shoulders and down her back, she wears a cute little black dress that barely contains her curves, and she stomps and dances excitedly in knee-high black leather boots. Her round cheeks and button nose make Josie the cutest person in all of Manhattan, and pretty shimmery pink and purple makeup stands out against her tan skin, making her dark brown eyes shine.

You are outfitted similarly with a tight black tee tucked into a black denim skirt, cleavage on full display. You wear black combat boots with warm, fuzzy black socks, and enough makeup to make your eyes pop, including a light dusting of pink and purple courtesy of Josie.

"I'm getting fucked!" Josie shouts over the reggaetón track, bouncing her hips to the beat while the two of you lean against the wooden bar top. Her voice is rich and somewhat nasally as she shouts, with a quick lilt to her accent.

"Fucked up?" you shout back, unsure whether you misheard your friend, delighted when her smile widens and she says, "Yeah, that too!"

Being that this is a college bar that happens to throw somewhat over the top ladies night events, you flash your student ID as well as the fake ID that identifies you as a woman named Sandra as soon as the bartender comes by.

You need not do so, however, because the bartender, whose name is Daniel in some circles and Changkyun in others, recognizes you, giving you a slow, hungry once-over with his eyes that makes your heart pound. Then he flashes a pointed smile and leans against the bar top so that he can easily be heard when his soft, deep voice asks, "Ladies, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

Before you can open your mouth, Josie leans over the bar and shouts, "Two Long Islands!"

As soon as Daniel nods and turns away to get started on your drinks, Josie hip-checks you, causing you to stumble and turn to her with a wide, curious expression. You know what she is going to say before she even says it – "You need to hook up with him!" – and you are already shaking your head before the words come out.

"He's just doing his job," you argue, because this is not the first time Josie has pointed out the way he looks at you, or how he seems more attentive to you than to literally any other patron. Yes, you are in denial, but now is not the time to get tangled up with the sexy bartender.

"You're full of shit!" Josie manages to shout before Daniel is back.

He sets your drinks down, nodding politely to Josie before fixing you with an intent gaze and giving a shy little smile. "This round is on the house," he says so softly that you don't really hear it, only knowing the words because you have memorized the shape of his lips when he says them.

Daniel has a bit of a baby face, with wide, dark almond eyes and pretty, soft lips. His nose and cheekbones are all hard angles, however, and his short dark hair, which is parted down the middle, falls around his eyes and down to the apples of his cheeks, only accentuating his features more. Much like your targets, he has dual citizenship between the US and Korea, hence having two names that he goes by – something some but not all dual citizens might do.

"Thanks, Danny," you say with a wink, making Daniel's eyes widen before he stands up straight.

"My pleasure, ladies," he responds, looking to Josie and then back at you. The moment he is out of earshot, Josie groans.

"Why don't you make a move on him?" you ask before she has a chance to hound you more. You lift your drink and take the thin black straw between your teeth, chewing lightly on it as you walk away from the bar, through the growing crowd, toward the dancefloor.

"Don't be stupid!" Josie finally responds when you find a place on the outer edge of the dancing mass of bodies. "He looks at you like he wants to eat you. Just let him!"

You roll your eyes and shake your head, chuckling. Around you, college students dance and shout, clearly far too drunk already for how early it is. As you take your first sip of your drink, it rocks through you; even the smallest taste of the Long Island iced tea is strong as hell, making you wince despite its sweetness.

"I don't miss being that young and irresponsible," Josie says, leaning over a tall round table that you have found to perch your elbows against, gazing out at the mass of students.

Josie works in the Forensic Investigation Division. Whenever a crime scene is processed and evidence is gathered, she is the one testing it to match it to information in the various systems in search for DNA, blood type, fingerprints, fibers, and so on. Her work is used in court to solve and defend cases. "It is absolutely bonkers being back in college," you respond, withholding the detail that you are not really a student because Josie is aware of the very basics of your assignment. "Their problems seem so silly compared to the shit we see at work."

Josie nods listlessly as she scans the throng of dancing bodies, more or less distracted from the conversation. And as you follow her gaze, you see who she has zeroed in on.

There is a man on the dancefloor surrounded by a group of friends, and he looks a lot like your superior Seokjin. He is not your superior, of course, but the resemblance is certainly enough to catch your friend's attention, as her crush on your boss is nothing short of sickening.

"Shit," you shout over the raucous music, leaning toward Josie. "I forgot to feed the anaconda before I left."

Josie nods her head in slow, lackadaisical movements, and you shake your head; even complete nonsense won't get her attention when she is this focused, but you continue for fun, anyway.

"There goes all the neighborhood pets! His appetite is insatiable."

A pause follows before Josie, who turns her face toward you but keeps her eyes on the Seokjin lookalike, mutters, "Totally," drawing the word out nice and slow.

Ordinarily, you would lay into your friend a little harder, making your story a little more fantastical, but you take the opportunity to pull out your phone and continue on your mission. Vante is not going to swipe on himself, and now that you have paid for Tinder gold and can see everyone who has swiped right on you, you are certain that your search is only going to get easier.

* * *

It takes around thirty-two hours of frequent swiping with three burner phones all showcasing similar profiles with a similar name to find a man who looks like Vante. And, as Seokjin predicted, he goes by the name V.

It takes four more hours for him to message you. The entire time your hand itches toward your phone, eager to make the first move, but you want to see the way he operates, and you want him to think he has full control.

Just as Seokjin predicted, he is 4,000 miles away – which tracks because he is in Milan until the end of the week – and he is using photos that only show part of his face. Luckily, his mouth is distinguishable.

For your part, on one of the profiles you created, you chose photos that you think resemble the girl in the photos in Vante and Min's case file, also only showing parts of your face. And you are not at all surprised when that particular profile is the one he seems drawn to. It makes you wonder if he saw any of the other profiles that you created or not.

You stare at the screen uncertain whether your flirting is all just part of the plan or if you really would like to find out just how well Vante lives up to his promises of not squandering an opportunity for pleasure. He is extremely forward and, to your surprise, it gives you butterflies.

Ordinarily, men speaking this way moments after you first meet would be a red flag, but for some reason, the assignment of getting close to Vante adds to the intrigue – daresay it excites you a little.

All of this feels dangerous. But you have never been one to turn down the chance to play with fire.

i fake my life like i've lived too much i take whatever you're giving - not enough overground, watch this space i'm open to falling from grace

🎵 visit the playlist!

note: i added this to the master list, but in case it has been missed i just want to add the disclaimer that all detective work and cop jargon in this fic is either made up on the spot or comes from years of watching/listening to true crime media. i have no credentials in this field and i do not claim to know what i am talking about!!! alsoooo lol if your name is Sandra, no it's not. (jkjk hello Sandra! i hope you're having a lovely day!!!)

also!!! some folks seemed confused by Seokjin, so just to clear his involvement up: yes, he was thought to be dead in Boy Blue.

i am thinking about doing little "drabble" chapters where you get to see conversations only between taegi that mc will not be aware of. we'll see how i end up doing it. (is this something you're into or would you prefer 100% of mc's pov like in Boy Blue?)

💙 me sprinkling in the Boy Blue callbacks:

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#yoongi x reader #taehyung x reader #taegi x reader #bts poly #bts yandere #bts angst #bts smut #bts social media au #undescribed #undescribed images #fic: white lies

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