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#but anyway as much as i would love support for this show...I get it
In response to the Mile High Job post, I hate that Parker implies that poor flight attendant slept her way to a promotion/better shift. Her day is super weird but her cat is fine and her life is saved. That rumor, however, might stick and that didn't really feel like Leverage to me.
Agreed!
The thing with Leverage is that it's a show from the late 2000s; it feels contemporary, but actually it is a bit dated. And, like all shows, it had some problematic elements, which get a bit more Obviously Problematic as time goes by (I am just waiting for someone to write a lengthy call-out post in 5 years' time and for the Discourse to start.) For example, Tumblr loves to declare that Leverage has a "canon" throuple, but if anyone read that and then watched the show they would be profoundly disappointed - while it's a fantastic ship with a great many shippy instances, Elliot has a lot of onscreen No Homo moments, and frequently is shown sleeping with random women (I personally read him as aromantic). Similarly, there are two big relationships in that show: Nate/Sophie, and Parker/Hardison. And we all wax lyrical about the brilliance of Parker/Hardison and how healthy it is, and for good reason; but we gloss over how unbearably "I hate my wife/father I cannot click the book" Boomer humour Nate/Sophie is.
(He literally calls her a shrew in one episode. She throws a tantrum and sulks if he doesn't remember the exact details of how/where they met. She's stereotypically 'romantic' and he's stereotypically 'cynical' and she has to Save Him From Himself, and he self-deprecatingly says he should just know when to stop arguing because she's always right. Like... it is a grubby and uncomfortable dynamic; but, it's also aimed at a different segment of the audience that is older than me, and that's okay, actually. It just means I don't much care for the ship myself.)
Anyway, this is one other such instance. Clearly someone in the writers' room thought that was a funny joke, and not enough people disagreed, and so in it went. What's nice is that Sandi McCree, who plays the other flight attendant that stays on the plane, actually kind of saves that joke for me with her performance. When Parker first boards and declares that her co-worker is not coming in, McCree looks disgruntled at the sudden change to her staff list when she wasn't informed; she's annoyed at management. Then Parker makes the sleeping-with-pilots comment, and McCree looks disgusted and furious -
An expression she then pulls at Parker every time she sees her for the rest of the episode, even when Parker is technically not doing anything particularly weird. It's not necessarily intentional on McCree's part (Parker IS very weird in this episode, so it very much can be a response to that), but to me it means you can read it as "This woman is absolutely furious at the lateral sexism of this white girl because We Love And Support Each Other On This Plane." So, for me, between that and the aforementioned revelations of the day (the plane was brought down by the domestic terrorists of a Fortune 500 company, but saved by... a few unexplained Official People who snuck aboard??? And the other flight attendant was made to miss the plane after all under mysterious circumstances and was not promoted??? What???), I don't think Sandi McCree's character wouldn't put those pieces together.
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dreamsky-sapphi · 16 hours
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Nanamahi brainrots
All my comments on each point below <3
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Note: I mainly focus on Nanamahi here ⬇️
• Easily Jealous / Too Careless
Even with Nana i think Mahiru would easily still be jealous.
Not in the same way she was with Karen, but in more of a "i have a special relationship with Nana" so she can't help but feel a bit of jealousy when she sees Nana with someone else, except if it's Junna. Despite this jealousy, she wouldn't do or say anything about it, but I think Nana may guess it and find it a little amusing and tease her about it in private.
For Nana, no matter if we consider that she is still not over Junna or not, I think she would still feel possessive over Mahiru, and wouldn't hesitate to show it more than Mahiru would, things such as just approaching from behind with a bright smile like she seems to do everytime she feels threatened.
• Destroys everything to have you / Kills you to save the world
Mahiru would lean more towards sacrificing Nana for the sake of everyone. Of course she cares about Nana but she cares about everyone more, bc she knows that at this point it is almost impossible to convince Nana out of her mindset. She knows how Nana thinks so she would know what would be best in the end.
Nana probably would lean more on sacrificing everything else if she was at a point where she feels like she lost everything, but I didn't put her to the extreme bc Mahiru isn't the one in her heart, and she still cares about everyone else.
• I don't deserve any of this / I deserve to be with you
Nana thinks of herself as some kind of monster, even if she craves love like anyone else. But I don't think she'd ever think she deserves any sort of sympathy.
Mahiru just has terribly low self-esteem and would rather put others before herself in any situation.
• Would revive you if you died / Leaves you to die anyway
I'm not entirely sure for this one, I just think that above everything else, they are both too caring to just let the other die.
At least they would not let the other die without them...
• Clings onto others (especially the other) / Cold exterior
I'd say they both just like physical contact, Nana more than Mahiru.
Mahiru wasn't exactly a physical person except maybe to Karen, but I think she would like the proximity Nana would provide her, like a sense of security. Isn't it comforting to melt into a hug. Idk I just think she would like being hugged by someone taller as well.
Nana would like the contact as some kind of reminder that Mahiru won't leave her anytime soon, so more of a possessive motive.
• "This is fate, isn't it?" / "It was a coincidence, that's all"
This doesn't really reflect whether they believe in fate or not.
I wouldn't be able to tell for sure for Nana, but I think Mahiru does believe in fate, but it just never turns out the way she wished it would (first example obviously is Karen and Hikari, but also anything related to others getting the lead roles she would have loved to get).
Specifically in a Nanamahi setting, I'd say they both think this just happened to be when they needed it the most, just pure coincidence.
This wasn't meant to be but it's convenient for both of them.
• "Let's leave this place" / "I can't just leave everything for 'you'..."
Nana doesn't have much to lose anymore and would lean more on not caring about leaving everything behind to keep this relationship, bc even if it hurts both of them, the pain brings her comfort and will have trouble thinking theres any other way to feel better, at least in the present. It's easier to indulge in this temporary comfort and cut yourself from the outside to fully enjoy it.
As for Mahiru, despite her loneliness, she has too much to lose compared to Nana. Mahiru's loneliness is not the same as what Nana feels because she still has and had so many friends and a loving family who support her. She still want to achieve things and she can't just leave everything behind for this comfort which she knows is only temporary. This is where it would make more sense for someone like Claudine to bring her comfort instead, since she would push Mahiru forward more while Nana would want to stay in a constant cycle of pain.
• A bloody marriage / "I still don't feel a thing"
I'm not sure what a bloody marriage is, but I think Nana would believe there isn't any sort of "love" between them. Ofc it isn't just a random friendship (I don't think that friends just casually kiss all the time), but she would lean more on believe there is nothing worth calling "love".
As for Mahiru, she's more sensitive when it comes to romantic feelings, and might develop a little something, but definitely not a cute kind of love. More of what would be seen as emotional dependence.
Even so, she'd keep thinking to herself that it isn't love and would try to think there's nothing between them despite her growing feelings.
• Self-sacrificial / Would give you away for nothing at all
I don't think neither of these people pleasers would even care about themselves enough to sacrifice the other for nothing.
• "See you in the next life" / "This will never happen again"
They hope such a situation won't ever happen again in the future, but Mahiru would lean more on wanting to meet Nana again in another lifetime where they don't feel so sick and can have fun like they did in highschool (not that Nana doesnt want it but she might think that if they met again, things would end up the same).
• "I don't feel a thing" / "You make me feel alive"
Honestly the entire reason they're together.
When they're by themselves, it's just their thoughts and themselves. They wouldn't feel comfortable enough to open up to anyone about their feelings: they're supposedly getting better now.
I can easily think while they can act normally around others, they'd be like walking corpses once alone when their moods aren't at their best.
By finding each other, someone who can understand their ugly feelings, they can find comfort in each other's arms.
• Would go back in time to save you / Things like that are impossible
We mentionned this with Risse earlier but if Mahiru was given the ability to timeloop, she may have done it.
But my nanamahi setting is leaning towards the future where the revues are over, so when it isn't even possible anymore. Mahiru isn't aware of the timeloops.
Mahiru wouldn't even believe that is a possibility.
Nana would do it again.
• "I need anyone by my side" / "I don't need anyone anymore except you"
In a time where loneliness overtakes her mind, Mahiru would probably be fine as long as anyone could be here for her or at least make her feel needed in a way that isn't like her family needs her or her regular friends need her.
Her love and interactions with Karen have left a scar in her that doesn't heal properly and made her feel the need to find someone who can make her feel needed in a similar way again.
Nana on the other hand has given up and only wants one person by her side.
• "We're friends, right?" / "I wished we were something more"
Between Nana and Mahiru, Mahiru would probably be the one yearning for something more concrete than a weird special bond, while Nana views this more as just mutually helping out.
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altraviolet · 1 day
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TFOne!
I enjoyed it! Spoilery thoughts under the cut.
The scenery was so artfully and beautifully done!
-The way Iacon was built, with buildings coming up from the ground and down from the 'sky,' was so pretty! Actually, it's not until just NOW that I'm realizing how that works. The buildings are basically stalactites and stalagmites underground- attached to the ceiling and floor of an unimaginably huge cave.
-The surface! A fantastic feeling of awe as the characters rode up to the surface to find the stars and the landscape and the colors. The changing/rippling surface was super intriguing and I think that some of the first canon descriptions of Cybertron included that element - constantly changing landscape - but, citation needed. The wildlife and the flora were so pretty. I personally would've loved to see more about that, but I know in a kid's movie we have to focus on other things xD
-The character designs themselves I'm not super in love with, but they're not bad, they're fine. It was fun to watch the background for familiar characters, and MY GOD the "Jazz gets doorwingies and they bounce" moment was SO CUTE! Loved that.
The writing was totally fine. We definitely get invested in the characters. It was very nice to see the friends -> enemies pipeline in action. The moment Sentinel Prime mentioned his dead fellow Primes I thought, "lol bet you killed them" and yeah. As each scene progresses, you can easily predict what's going to happen plot-wise. But, you know, kid's movie, lol. You have a pretty simple premise, a few characters, some good dynamics... yeah, it did a good job balancing all that. If it weren't a kid's movie, it could've cut back on the 'humorous' moments (or made them less slapsticky) and spent more time on other things, and still retained the positive elements :D
Some things TFOne did very well that I hope future offerings from the franchise adapt:
-focus on smaller group of characters (especially if in a movie. a comic or serialized show can support a larger cast)
-focus on NOT THE WAR. we've seen it. we've seen iiiiiit 😭 give us more 'day in the life.' mining, racing- these are all nice glimpses into previously established, normal things. TF is science fiction: leaning into the worldbuilding for Cybertronians will add soooo much to the storytelling
-no humans 🎉🎉🎉🎉 this is a personal preference of mine, of course, but I would much rather watch the robots interact with each other, and their culture and their world, than see them come to earth and do the "revealed to humans" thing for the 4000th time. also, the humans are usually so annoying. my god. let the robots be the human analogs- that is what sci fi is. we see ourselves in other worlds, etc etc.
Where do we go from here, story-wise?
A quick recap of the conflicts in TFOne:
-OP-D friendship turmoil
-Sentinel Prime('s lies) vs the reality of the world
-Cybertronians vs Quintessons
By the end this changes to:
-OP vs Meg, and by extension, Autobots vs Decepticons
(-Sentinel Prime is dead)
-Quintessons are still out there soooo...??
It's a natural segue to The (civil) War, but the external threat from the Quintessons still exists. It'd be interesting to see what a sequel did, addressing that. OP would be fighting two fronts... which would naturally push the Autobots to finally abandon Cybertron, which is what leads to Earth landings and meeting with humans. But the movie ends with Cybertron overflowing in energon: now it's even more appealing to the Quintessons.
idk man. I'd love to see a different solution to what we've seen before.
anyway, this is long enough. I do recommend seeing the movie, if you can. It's visually stunning and fun. I hope it does well so that Uncle Hasbro dumps more money into this kind of storytelling.
On a personal note, I saw this with the 2 friends I saw RoTB with last year, and afterwards, we posed in front of the giant poster stand thingy in the movie theater lobby. My friend held up a finger like ☝️ as in "one" as in TF One, lol, so now when I think of this movie it comes with that sign
TF☝️
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lyrenminth · 17 hours
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The way you are
"Mmmm I like what I see" Justin raspy voice says from the bedroom's door. You straighten up, covering your breasts. It's his voice and the way he looks at you that makes you flush. You don't feel hot anymore, after three children your body changed a lot. A flat belly it's impossible at this point, and there are stretch marks in your belly, between your thighs, ass and boobs. And Justin is still hot, older, wiser. Lucky you.
You turned you back to him to put a bra on. "You scare me" you reply. You feel his presence behind you, and his big hands touching your breasts and your belly, hugging you, bringing you closer to him. He kisses the top of your head, then your neck, you feel the stubble grazing your tender skin, you squirm away. "Are you not tired?" after practice he still makes time to fulfill his dad duties, playing with the children or helping them with their homework.
"No, not so much" he replies, smiling against your ear. "God, you are so soft" you try your best to keep him close to you, but sometimes the self-sabotage is strong and you think he says those things out of pity. You're his wife, the mother of his children and yet, you don't feel good enough.
"My hair is wet" you say struggling to lock your bra, Justin takes the bra off, his hands covering your breasts instead. "I like it better like this" he says, playing with your boobs, pinching the nipples. You giggle, and turn around to face him. "The kids are already in bed?" you ask. "Yes, I left everything prepared for tomorrow. You don't need to worry" you stand on your tip toes to give him a grateful kiss. He leans on, and what it was supposed to be a chastise kiss turns into something more when he slips his tongue inside your mouth. "Justin.." you whisper, flustered. His intensity always surprises you, because usually he's in control about most things.
"Are you tired?" he asks against your lips. Meaning: do you want to fuck?
"No, but I don't feel sexy" you laugh. You can't hide the sadness in your voice. Justin stops to look at you, frowning. "I noticed you have been rejecting me more lately, it's because of that?" he wonders, serious. You gulp, feeling guilty. "Mmmm, yes. Some days"
"You're the most beautiful woman in my eyes" he lowers himself to be at the same eye-level as you. His words are honest and raw. He touches your belly full of stretch marks. "You made me a father, you give me a family, a purpose, everything I wanted it. You're my best friend and as the co-president of the Best Friends Committee, I forbidden self-hate" he jokes, remembering the old joke you made when you became friends back then. "And, you turn me on so much doing anything, baby" he says a little ashamed. "When you bend over the dishwasher, hard on. Packing lunches for our kids, hard on. Helping Mr. Reynolds with his poodle, hard on"
"Okay, I get it" you say, feeling emotional over his confession. "But I-I wish I could change some things"
"Like what?"
"My belly for instance" he looks pensive for a few moments before saying "I love you, I love you before and after all we went through, but I want you to feel happy. I recall you mentioned surgery to "fix you" and...well, if it's truly what you want, I would support you" he declares, getting closer once again. "But don't push me away, don't hide from me please. I love you as you are"
You press your lips together trying not to cry. "I love you" you hug him, burning your chest on his pecs, smelling his perfume. You don't realize that you're naked, but doesn't matter because Justin wants you anyway. You felt something poking at your belly.
"Let me show you that I don't care" he says softly against your ear. "Let me show you how much I adore you"
Your heart beats fast against your chest, feeling the butterflies again. After a decade together, Justin still makes you giggle like a highschool girl. Your hands take some liberties and run across his body, feeling the muscles underneath the blue shirt that makes his eyes sparkle more.
And now those eyes a eating you slowly. Lusty Justin is a sight to behold.
You lick your lips. The ache in between your legs growing each moment.
"Yes, show me please"
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tsuwabuki · 18 hours
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what if kobeni had a contract with famine?
1. she's the first one to mention starving in the infinity devil trap.
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2. you could hide some foreshadowing under innocuous comments that anyone could make. it's not odd for a poor 20 year old girl to take comfort and enjoyment in tasty food. mentioning the hobby right after 'my devil is a secret' could be nothing, but....
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3. someone on reddit mentioned a possible 'final girl' devil with kobeni which I love but I felt the kitchen knife mention would match better with famine. after all, we see falling devil act as a chef preparing a meal for famine. could expand that to kobeni.
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4. after famine reveals her name at the aquarium, a kobeni bro makes his debut. also if the infinity devil was used by famine here, was it also used by famine the first time we see it?
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5. what we know of famines motivations and context as a horseman translates well to a theory on kobenis abilities. they seem quite powerful when activated so you would need a powerful demon.
5a. ok so my theory. when kobeni is starved of enough good things (family, luck, companionship, safety, bravery, etc), to the point she is fully starved from her humanity, she becomes hyper competent.
you see her fail to reach this state in the hotel due to her clinging to humanity (feels bad about wanting denji dead, for stabbing aki, etc). I think she succeeds in reaching hypercompetence during the rhythm game bit due to being terrified and isolated, it just so happens that the hypercompetence went into playing the rhythm game.
the only other moment where kobenis devil contract ability(ies?) come into play is after her partner gets killed protecting her and she finds out her whole team has been wiped out.
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5b. ok so how does this hyper competence after 'starvation' relate to famine as a devil? well the horsemen act as as symbols and metaphors for humanity/life to triumph over.
we see that supported by both conquest and famine taking the role of nurturing humans to become stronger. you could even make that claim for all devils but this isn't about that.
starving is supposed to trigger humanity's instinct to survive by Doing Whatever It Takes. this fits nicely to how I think kobenis contract functions and why she would accept a nerf on her life like that (and how it plays into mental health, childhood abuse, and how someone could choose permanent(?) self destruction at such a young point of their life).
the fact that we see her devil contract trigger (rhythm game) after she's already left public safety means she's stuck with that contract probably the rest of her life. she wanted to go to college but her neglectful parents forced her to pick between sex work and the equivalent of demon fodder.
and because we don't know anything about her contract, we don't know how much she gave up to have this power 😭 being starved of good luck sounds like a really bad longterm debuff even if you theoretically get really good luck at your most terrified moments.
i lost my train of thought here but I'll add one more tangential thing. fujimoto is showing multiple examples of what childhood abuse and/or lack of a stable life can do to someone and how those systems help, hurt, and trap them. kobeni is an example of something more grounded despite her being comedic relief and I love that contrast with her.
she was forced to join the military due to family pressure and economic situation, could not handle the mental strain and quit with a potential life long disability that could get worse over time. she gets a job at a fast food restaurant and has spent her life so far hopping from one toxic 'family' to another.
anyways. throwing kobeni famine contract into the theory pile
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cloysterbell · 27 days
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Pete, I need you to stay here.
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hella1975 · 9 months
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very interesting to me that the big three of the current hero gen in mha - shouto, midoriya and bakugo - are often portrayed as also being the closest in a lot of fics bc it's like. you've got shouto's two best friends as a boy with a volatile personality fuelled by his blind ambition and desperation to be the best, and a boy whose quirk destroys his body. like if you combined two of shouto's best friends you'd get touya but we're just not supposed to redeem him. okay
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moeblob · 11 months
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just gonna lay down and think about FE Fates for a while now... don't mind me
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moe-broey · 7 months
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Forever thinking about this panel
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He will NOT be accepting hugs for any mundane reason and if you try he will react like he's being hunted for sport
But I am ALSO thinking about
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He will give a little sympathetic pat on the back........ if you're feeling down ......
Alfonse physical affection seems to vary and is situational 👍
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faaun · 3 months
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i feel rly sad and conflicted abt one of my best friends on earth but idk who to ask for advice bc i usually would have consulted her in this situation lmao
#shes cool and i dont want to lose her and i know Logically i love her but atm i feel so strange towards her#and idk what to do abt it bc i know in the past ive like...over-communicated a lot and over the last few yrs ive been trying to not do that#bc thats an anxious impulse i think .so like . self control#AND IMPORTANTLY . i may actually be the problem here ?? ok again i love her i dont want to lose her etc but basically ive noticed a pattern#which is that whenever she gets a bf/a man (even fwb) in her life she basically stops talking to me and the limited interactions we do have#become abt him. and while i support her it is acc too much. like we barely talked while she was w her ex bf until he became abusive and#then we talked a lottt like all our convos understandably were abt him . and then when they broke up we kept hanging out so i didnt rly see#the pattern there but still she seemed to centre men a lot in her life like sbe was excited to not date and find herself and then#immediately afterwards started seeing this other guy with whom shes basically in a relationship now#hes nice and all but like . HES ALL SHE TALKS ABT . actually we barely talk atp but when we do its abt him#she sends me reels sometimes but its all abt being jealous abt him etc . and shes bi but she said she doesnt like the idea of dating women#bc theyre scary . and i thought she was kidding in the ohhh women r so beautiful that theyre intimidating way but no she was being entirely#fr . she explained jts bc she was bullied by a girl in the past but like...bro ur ex bf literally abused you like surely you see men are#capable of just as much harm? but obvs who she dates is her own choice . but anyway she has consistently made plans w me then cancelled the#like an hr before . or asked to call me and then proceeded to not do so . when i ask her to meet/call its the same she just doesnt respond#or she cancels ? and while i understand anxiety sucks it feels SO WEIRD STILL . maybe im the problem slightly too bc ik i have no right to#feel this way but it rubs me the wrong way that ik she has so much time to spend w him/calls him all the time despite meeting him just a fe#months ago whereas i just have to like ...be ok w not actually having talked to her for a long time#its gotten to the point where when she says do you wanna meet/call i automatically respond yes and then just assume it doesnt happen . like#there have been several times over the past few months i double booked plans over when we were supposed to call/meet bc i was sure she#wouldnt show up and ive been right each time#like she sends me texts that she misses me or im her best friend etc etc occasionally and then acts rly . contrary to that ?#ive talked to her abt the issue w cancelling on me twice btw. when i was still dating the situationship person she would get sooo mad at#them for not respecting my time and shed tell me i deserve better etc etc and then like . she doesnt seem to respect my time at all#anyway she said she understand and she admits to like...being flaky etc but does nothing abt it#and its not like i can tell her to stop caring so much abt men bc we sorta had convos like that b4 she got This involved w this guy#and apparently it did nothing and the last thing i want is to police her relationships or get in her way#its just AUSHD AUGH#anyway i rly miss her it just doesnt feel the same at all anymore
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bruhstation · 2 years
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the journey of gordon juniperus gresley (and still ongoing)
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angeltism · 5 months
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"spar.kle is fictional who cares" I have seen people praising her for her racist anti-romani comments what the fuck kind of world do you live in
#➳ the fool speaks#fuuuck man i don't think fiction and reality will influence each other 1=1 but characters being weirdos or bigots and it not being#criticized for it makes those kinds of people who Very Much Already Exist IRL think they're in the fucking right. they aren't.#i don't think someone getting spar.kle in hsr is going to turn them into a fucking racist but her being Like That and looking cute#and being playable and not getting called the fuck out in game makes people who ARE racists have a cutesy girl to idolize and support and#use as a way to say shit without getting in trouble because ''ermmm I'm not the one who wrote her!! i just think she's really funny!! she's#not real anyways why are you mad!!''#like my god shut UP#again like. pulling for her or thinking she's cute doesn't mean you want all roma dead. that. that isn't how that works#but if you think of hoyo's writing of her is good and funny and not problematic at all I'd LOVE to know what you think about#how real life roma r treated to this day. like genuinely let's have a little chat. I'm sure you have normal not-racist opinions#and do not use the g slur and do not defend it and tootally don't view roma just as all the bad stereotypes right !!!!#*ok actually pulling for her kinda. shows support to hoyo for whatever weird ass decision someone on their team made#to go ''ah yes let's add racism but make it a cute girl and make it 'funny' this'll get us so much money''#and if you spent on her banner. look idk what to say. shame? yeah shame. hoyo in general is not a company that deserves your money there#are better things to spend your cash on. like literally look at how they treated sum.eru and they made the guy inspired by roma WHITE ???#generally. not something I would advise spending on. but like ok especially on the racist character y'know#anyways.
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getosugurusbangs · 8 months
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every day i thank god that my mom is supportive of my design headcanons for characters because if i had to answer her questioning me about why i do it, i’d probably lose it
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volivolition · 4 months
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Idk if you saw or not but a new chapter of the fury of a shattered mirror dropped last night! I haven’t read it yet but I thought I should let you know 😎👍
awughgh HELL YEAH!! ive been away from my laptop for a while so i didnt see, thank you birdy!! :] this is the best news ive had all day hkjgh <33 excited very excited going to read it now <33
#volta transmissions#SKILLS ARE BACK BABEYYYYYYY!! ehehehehe :] oh i LOVE seeing them come back from just ''??????'' SMILES REALLY HAPPILY#welcome back to the world little ones... oh im so happy to see them... :'] ''You do you softie'' EHEHE... skills interactions :D! yay!!!!!#okay i'll add more liveblogging in the tags as i go probably hkjhg <33 i appreciate you very much birdy <33#''the avant-garde prick is just making shit up again'' HAKJDHKJ... ''You did us proud holding out til the end'' WAH... ENDURANCE... ;O;#WELCOME BACK ENCY SMILES!!! no motorics skills yet though thats to be expected hkjh <3 ency ''you have the facts'' and#empathy ''and the emotions'' HKJGH IS THAT A FACTSFEELINGS SKILLSPOSTING REFERENCE /J lots of voli talking!!! very happy about this <3#VOLITION - ''if we had the logician here...'' ''...'' ''damnit i thought that would work'' HAHAJKSHDSKJH SMILES. HA.#''Punch something. maybe Coach will show up'' HHFKJH... oh my god this makes me so happy... cmon we gotta get the gang back together...#half light!! hello!! my darling!! LETS GO!! ough buT NOT ENOUGH TO GET ARMS BACK NOOUIGHJ MOTORICS WHERE ARE YOU LITTLE BUDDIES???#''try to get eyes back online'' ''come on come on--'' OUGH I LOVE... i love how theyre all supporting each other as they come back online..#TEAMWORK!! CMON LETS GET EVERYONE BACK!! YEAH BOI WE GOT A MOTORICS BACK UP!! HELLO PERCEP! calm down! you need composure in here!!#THE JOYWIRE... OUGH STOP STOP IM SO FOND... VOLI CMON. nooo ourgh takes damage... ''You were really gonna cut me out?'' AWAH... WAHHH!!!!!#ow my heart my HEART. chemi baby my little darling... hugging him kissing his forehead... THERES OUR LOGICIAN HELLO DARLING!!#hkjh trying to cue in interfacing DAMN :'] good metaphor anyway concept it was very well laid. voli keeping track of each of them too hehe#HI DRAMA YAYY! platonic love story! friends!!! ''Neuroplasticity's off the charts.'' ''I'm surprised you know a word that long that isn't-#'''amphetamines''' ''Dextromethorphan asshole'' HAJKSH YOU FUCKING TELL 'EM! YOU'RE NOT E-CHEMISTRY FOR NOTHING!!!#again with trying to get Phys back in hkjhg INLANDDD SMILES HI THERE DREAMER!! Logic just like ''yeah. i hate it here.'' ''have you tried?'#okay this is the 20th tag. hopefully a reblog will be enough to finish out my thoughts but god knows i have so much to say hjhg#esprit: Birdy
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orcelito · 2 months
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Ykno the suckiest thing about being broken up with for someone else is that like. Well I'm doing generally fine, all things considered, but I Am kinda sad thinking about the things I've lost and all the casual affection that I can't have now.
But she's out there having all the affection she wants from her coworker, and it's just like. Damn this feels so skewed and SO unfair.
#speculation nation#and then U add in the fact that the girl she broke up with me for is already dating someone else (poly sort of situation)#and im just like. WHYYYYY did she break up with me instead of trying to negotiate poly???#she was gonna at first but when i expressed concern about poly given her obvious communication problems about it#then she dropped me like a hot coal. like sorry i wasnt about to let myself be stood up and ignored for basically a whole day#just to accept u trying to negotiate poly. like What?????#anyways i may have a bit of a history with being a bit of an asshole and breaking up with them#but at LEAST ive never broken up with anyone to immediately start dating someone else#and at LEAST ive broken up with them in person and not over text!!! the fuck?????#i keep alternating between 'surprisingly okay with it all' and 'maybe a little sad' and 'absolutely fucking LIVID'#and i keep wanting to yell at her more but i already said quite a lot of things. so id just be repeating myself#and at that point id just be a vitriolic piece of shit. which i try not to be.#so im letting her live in peace while i continue to be So Pissed about it and it just sucks man lmfao#why do i gotta be the bigger person fr. i even apologized for the hurtful things i was saying in anger. literally in that same conversation.#and she gets to pull this stunt and walk free and spend so much time with her new 'love' ignoring the world etc etc#honestly i hope it fails miserably for her. bc sure theres a chance it works out but every single part of this is impulsive and So Stupid.#and even tho my ex agreed with me when i told her it was INSANE. she was just like 'i have to' like OKAY????#jesus fucking christmas she's revealed a side to me that i really hadnt seen before.#so i hope it fails and i hope she tells me about it. i hope she owns up to her mistakes. for my own satisfaction.#but i have 0 intention on ever taking her back. because what the fuck????#i may be a flawed individual with plenty of problems. but i still have basic fucking dignity. and i am NOT accepting this back in my life.#and god damn her friend is moving into the unit across from mine for this coming year#and i may have to see my ex sometimes bc of it 😭😭😭#the friend seemed generally level headed tho. idk if i happen across him & he doesnt avoid me maybe i'll ask him what he thinks of this#bc she was treating me with such love and affection showing me off to all her friends. and then she drops me like a fucking coal.#i wouldnt say i made friends with them myself but we were at least friendly. so i doubt theyd have a good opinion of her for this.#so would the friend loyalty take precedence? or would he be willing to chat with me and confirm Yeah what the fuck?#bc if i had a friend who did this same exact thing id be side-eyeing them SO hard.#id support them bc theyre my friend but i would also be like 'hey uh Why did you do that. that was pretty awful of u you know that right'#& itd also make me more cautious of them too. for being Able to drop someone so suddenly lol.
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wavesoutbeingtossed · 4 months
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#warning: rant about parent ahead#I’m so so so so so empathetic to mental health struggles#like exceedingly so#but it’s just so exhausting being on the receiving end of someone’s self-loathing#and to be clear I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT ANYONE HERE#you are all my phone besties and I have so much empathy for your struggles and know that i love you all#and wish i could say the right thing to support you all always and you are always welcome to share whatever is going on#and to quote the bard herself i wish i could take the bombs in your head and disarm them#but when my mother gets into these moods she just seems to use it as a way to get a rise out of us#she’s pulling the ‘well maybe you don’t want to do x with me because it’s not fun because I’m a terrible person and you’re scared of me#and i ruin everything so maybe you would just rather i do everything alone’#and i don’t doubt she feels horrible and i know she has intrusive thoughts etc#but that is so manipulative!!!! she then puts the onus on us to reassure her that she is not!!!! But that is not what she wants!!!!#which we then do profusely and remind her that we do love her and we do do things together and whatever the fuck is the problem of the day#but of course she won’t hear it#so yes it makes us scared of her because we are always worried we’re going to say the wrong thing in a given moment!!!!#i just shut the fuck up at all times now#but my dad tries to use reason with her and of course it just ends in her lashing out and projecting all this shit on him#’oh you maybe you actually hate me maybe you want to leave me’ etc#THEY’VE BEEN MARRIED DECADES HE’S THE MOST LOYAL AND KINDEST PERSON IN THE WORLD HE NEVER ONCE HAS#i honestly don’t know how he lets this roll off his back because i am so fed up with it#It’s just so so so so hard because one minute she’s ‘herself’ and the other she’s this inferno#and we just have to ride whatever wave she’s on and it sucks all the air out of the room#it’s like the one and only time i tried to very gently bring up that something she said was hurtful *after she’d brought it up herself*#she went on a ‘oh I’m a terrible person/terrible parent’ rant and it then turned into me reassuring her that she isn’t#i was just trying to show her how the language/behaviour she uses was hurtful to me#so anyway that was lesson learned that even if she invites it i will never speak of it and luckily she hasn’t since and that was years ago#But it’s just… i know bad thoughts can’t be helped and again i feel so much pain on her behalf for what she struggles with#and i wish i could help but there’s absolutely nothing i can do#AND SHE’S GONE OFF ALL HER MEDS SO THE ONE SOURCE SHE DID HAVE ISN’T THERE ANYMORE EITHER
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