#but damn man this is hurting my brain | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

which-item-poll · 7 months

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Omg tiktok is so confusing...

#i feel so old...#the only reason why i made a tiktok is to gain a bigger audience for affiliate marketing #but damn man this is hurting my brain

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bacchuschucklefuck · 4 months

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the boy-but-not-that-way-ism of riz gukgak send tweet

#not art #have been chipping away at a more... proper? so to say. piece of the kids for keepsake. and since its of them at the beach Im rotating #gender stuff in brain again. riz and gorgug ping a lot of the like funny gender stuff in my brain #very specifically adjacent to cultural understanding of it all... like I did say I do think riz has a gender and it can be #translated to ''man'' in solesian understanding but also that boy has close to no self awareness nor does he want to #he grew up as ''goblin'' before ''boy'' and it's kinda how he perceives himself. got a gender but doesn't wanna do much with it #kinda imagining him seeing his grandparents again and realizing that there's a gap there between himself and his grandpa too #and sitting with that for a bit. not for long that kid doesnt do that but for just a little bit #man I truly really do love that riz is aroace. my boy of the unquantifiable unimportant margins....#gorgug though is 100% trans lmao. there's a kinda distance to his own body in how he acts #that's kinda common in ''mad scientist'' characters? (or maybe my perspective's just skewed due to willow jenkins lmao)#kid spent the first two seasons fitting himself in places he Should be able to fit. and s3 is pretty much all about him Making New Spaces #thing is despite looking ardently for like. the reason Why he can't fit in in the first season I think gorgug really does #love his gnome parents and love being their child. and its confusing and tough to have to learn why something you love still hurts you #he wants it to not. he wants to make sense. and then it does and it changes nothing really #until he actively makes choices based on what he's learned. like. damn idk how to word it but #just like the ability to say ''actually this Is my life what are u gonna do? stop me from living it?'' is a powerful force #its rly fun to look at these two guys in these contexts thats like #they will never win the gender game just by virtue of being who they are. it's not designed for folks like them to win #but riz would simply not play and gorgug would design his Own game he's the champion of. and I think that rules

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brainworms-all-night-long · 2 months

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Not feeling it rn cuz idk how to disclose to my family (mom, really) that I have two very funnily misplaced random underskin lumps on my neck and and one on the back of my head, and that my mind immiditely jumped to the worst conclusion

#The constant fatigue migranes and brain fog ive had for a good year doesn't help #oh its the damned phone it's because you don't do anything all day it's because you don't see the sun #maybe #doesn't change the fact that they are there and I'm scared haha #had the one on the back of my head for a while #and definitely didnt have a panic attack over finding the third one earlier today when absemindedly scratching my neck #they're kinda hard to find but once you feel them boy oh boy it #sigh it just seems really idk. over the top?#like if I was suppoused to die couldn't it have been anything less mentally and money taxing lmao #why bother with cancer ffs it's not like I have anything in my life going on #and to think I was actually planning on getting it together #my mom has enough on her plate as she is #what with her work slowly killing her #why is she literaly the only one that would kinda care #only after telling me I'm definitely overreacting but still #whatver man #I can't sleep but my head hurts #it's just my period anyway #sorry guys I will be back to Joy and whimsy soon I'm sure #vent #like in amongus haha

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darkcreamz95 · 8 months

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Honestly heading out by yourself and your thoughts slowly drifting to Chapter 3 and 4 hurts...

A LOT

#joker out #nace jordan #jan peteh #damon baker #MAN I THOUGHT AT LEAST HEADING OUT TO GO SIT SOMEWHERE WOULD HELP #and then YOUR BRAIN GOES THERE #its already day 2 since the drop BUT IT STILL DAMN HURTS #personal #im like sitting at a cafe while waiting for my dad to be done with his event BUT THEN YOUR BRAIN GOES HI IS IT TIME FOR PAIN AGAIN

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beeholyshit · 4 months

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"The Moon looks beautiful tonight doesn't It....?"

#(🚂) *⁠.⁠✧ — Valentine Grantz #(♡⁠) ｡⁠.ﾟ—⁠ Eli Clark #taking a little break from my project to talk about them bc my brain is FRIED and my back is BROKEN #just gotta say. ehem #THANK YOU SO MUCH MILO FOR THIS BEAUTIFUL ART OMFG I LITERALLY WOKE UP AND SAW THIS WITH MY EYES ALMOST CLOSED. STILL ASLEEP AND JUMPED #MAN IT GOT ME SO EXCITED ALL DAY. THINKING ABOUT THE MOMENT TO POST IT #I'M SO PROUD OF U MAN. THE SHADONG IT'S SO SOFT AND BEAUTIFUL #AND. I ALREADY SAID IT. BUT IDC. YOU DRAW VALENTINE SO HANDSOME MAN #THW HAIR LOOKS SO BEAUTIFUL AND HIS FAAAAACEEEE. HIS EEYEEEESSSS #man you did so much justice to him THANK YOU SO NUCH I'M SO GRATEFUL #eli..... omfg #he looks so sweet and cute... that little smile of his ARGH #I LOVE HOW HIS HAIR IS POKES THROUGH THE ROBE AND THE #WHAT IS IT CALLED #MY ENGLISH IS FAILING ME #DAMN IT #YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.#BUT HE LOOKS SO CUTE ARGGHHH I wanna kiss him so bad I need to k #the way he holds his hand.... looking at the moon #oh gosh you knew exactly what to do I'm so.#gotta make a confession but #I completly fell in love with Eli the moment we were watching stageplay and he went to visit Aesop to talk to him and. watch. thw. mmmmmmoon #AGRHHRGGRHGRVRVRHHR #I'm not a hater I'm just #I love him so much it makes my brain hurt #now gotta continue with this thing #I'll talk more about them tomorrow #THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN MIWO #🩵 — Milo!!!#(🔮)*⁠.♡ —⁠ Valeli

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inkteresting-art · 2 months

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Please ignore this it's almost 1am and I can't sleep and am full of vinegar ...laying in bed stuck with my thoughts and man do they suck, for months all I've been doing it feeling guilty and horrible about myself and hoping to talk to people in hopes of apologizing and making burned ends less burnt.. I'm coming to the realization that it's never going to happen and need to just give up, I wont be getting my chance to speak.. I want to be forgiven, but at the same time, thinking about the pass two years and how angry I actually am about how things were stated and also parts left out, the forgiveness I deeply want really means nothing to me. if anything it's acted as a fuckin poison to my brain to constantly hope and think about it on a daily bases. Stuck thinking about how everyone hates me and not having a way out like a mouse stuck in a burning cage.

I miss drawing the things I liked, all my Fav OC's I now kinda hate due to having to throw them in the corner, forcing myself to redo them all when in the end not really having a good purpose to do so.

I don't know how to bounce back anymore but I have no choice but to try and walk away anyways. I'll find something that will click again and meet new people.

#Drama and mental illness really doesn't doesn't feel good man #The pills help abit but I still over think and have to deal with the constant anxiety #I know I keep talking about it but That's all that's flood my brain #Music doesn't even drown it out this just feels like public school all over again #Part of me wants to curl up and cry and the other wants me to just wants to scream in anger #I need a long ass vacation from myself #I am doing my best to watch my mouth and don't say stupid shit that's gonna get me in trouble #For most people isn't fuckin easy but for me IT AIN'T #Yes I've said alot of things that are hurtful and from the bottom of my heart I AM SORRY #I hate me to trust me I'm an open fish tank filter without the filter and have to do my hardest to keep that damn tank clean #It sounds so much like an excuse when I'm just stating a reason #I need to sleep man

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orcelito · 2 months

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Man and I'm gonna a have to go to my damned psychological testing initial interview like this. It sucks ass.

#speculation nation #im an anxious mess bc potential health reasons and also i got stood up.#still dont know why. hard to know when they havent replied all day :]#im scared something happened and im scared it's something i did wrong #and im scared for my fucking health bc it's been doing some weird shit lately.#but i have my initial psychological testing interview in an hour and i dont really know what to expect from it.#i played my samurai game and it was fun i guess but itd be more fun if i wasnt checking discord every 5 minutes #just to be disappointed upon seeing theres Still no fucking reply.#this sucks ass man. this sucks so bad. im trying to not be an asshole about it but it really does hurt.#2 hours later and 0 reply. what the fuck am i supposed to think??? i dont even fucking know.#ive had a pit in my stomach for about 3 hours now and it's not going away.#but im gonna have to go to the damned psychological testing and talk about why my brain's bad. fml.#negative/

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4arconinoma · 6 months

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Completely forgot to share that last week in a legitimately desperate attempt to catch this bus that was literally about to leave I fucking jumped onto it gripped the fucking hand rails with all my might right as the doors were closing and straight up got Crushed in between them. It was a bit traumatic but so stupidly comical. I don't know how this happened to me

#Felt so embarrassing in the moment that I guess my brain wiped the memory until now #That shit hurt so so bad. Like actually hurt really bad.#That being said I completely stand by my decision. I'd get crushed again and again if it meant not missing that God damned bus #I do NOT fuck around with being late!!! Small window of opportunity to catch these things in a capital man #txt

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astranauticus · 1 year

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i'm not even done with the new rwd episode but. spoilers ahead

anyway funny thing. i wasn't like, super on board with the professionals when i was first binging through the first 3 seasons and especially once we got to season 3 i tunnel visioned on VR-LA and MR-SN super hard (as is probably extremely obvious from my art) but like. 4.5?? the exchange they had??? the fucking breakup scene???? yeah. yeah i get it now. i have no idea why or what changed but i have now Gotten It at the worst possible timing. what the hell