#but everyone feels like this i promise

[nicollekidman]

hi abby! looking for some older sister advice/energy i’m feeling very fragile today.. i just started grad school in september and i am feeling soooo lonely. i don’t have close friends in the city i live in and i only hang out with ppl from school in class. i found out that everyone in my cohort has been hanging out a lot outside of class and i haven’t been invited which i understand bc i’ve been keeping to myself mostly. but! that doesnt make it hurt less. i hung out with some ppl for the first time yesterday and it was fun but the whole time i just felt so self conscious that i was saying weird things and acting weird. there was a huge expanse between myself and the ppl i was with and i’m afraid i’m responsible for it. i thought of myself as a competent socializer, a real silly guy, before the pandemic and now it feels so hard. and i just dk what to do with myself! i know it’s only the first quarter out of a 2 year program, but i can’t help but feel like i’m behind and the gap is too large to cross now. anyway love you♥️

it’s never too late! it’s absolutely natural to feel hugely self conscious the first time you feel like you’ve been “let into” a social space, but grad school is so hard for nearly everybody! if you feel like you’re the only one feeling that way you’re 100% wrong! keep putting yourself out there and when you hang out with people try your best to direct your focus outward instead of inward, at least until you leave! you can fixate and be anxious afterwards (haven’t found a cure for that yet) but try to enjoy the moment as it happens!! making friends as an adult is SO HARD that’s just true, but having a cohort is an advantage. try to accept every invite and just live in the moment, or plan things you can invite people to! it’ll feel weird every time until suddenly it doesn’t, and you realize these people are your friends and family. ❤️❤️❤️

[matchingbatbites]

"What the fuck did you do?"

Eddie wasn't expecting hostility when he answered Jeff's phone call, his best friend's usual calm demeanor replaced with open annoyance. And yeah, okay, the annoyance itself wasn’t new, but Eddie doesn’t think he’s actually done anything recently to earn it.

"Well-"

"Actually, no. I'll tell you what you did. You retweeted photos of Steve Harrington - internationally beloved heartthrob actor Steve Harrington - along with the caption 'not to sound like a subby slut but GOD I would be his puppy baby boy in a heartbeat'. So I guess the better question is, what the fuck were you thinking, Eddie?"

Eddie's jaw clicks shut because- yeah, he had done that. Had seen those photos of Steve smoking circling the internet and spent god knows how long just staring at them, had curbed the desire to shove his hand down his pants by posting a single thirst tweet about it.

“I was thinking, Jeff, that I'm allowed to post whatever I want to my private fucking twitter, man. I mean it's a free country, isn't a guy allowed to make a horny tweet about a sexy man every now and then?”

“You are, when you actually post it to your private account and not our award winning band's main account.”

No. Oh no. There's no way Eddie actually-

He rips his phone away from his face to open twitter, and realizes two things simultaneously. One, Jeff is right, he had posted it to the band's account. Not on his private, locked, personal account, but on the account that's actually open and free for literally anyone on earth to look at.

The second thing he realizes is that their notifications are currently flooded with responses to Eddie's tweet, somehow racking up into the thousands in the few hours it's been since. 

Jesus Christ.

“Eddie?”

The metalhead jerks back into the moment and put Jeff on speaker so he can scroll through the horde of replies, says “Fuck, I fucked up. Are we gonna have to do damage control on this?”

In the mess is a reply from Gareth's own personal account: @ corrodededdie stop tweeting from the band account challenge 🙄🙄🙄

”Maybe. There hasn't been any type of response from Harrington or his people, but they might ask us to take it down if it blows up too much.“

Eddie hums, thinking they might be too little, too late about it blowing up too much, and flips over to his main account so he can reply to Gareth's little jab appropriately. He isn't surprised to see that he has a couple of new messages, probably from other people wondering just what the fuck Eddie was thinking, but when he goes to check them-

He's never been happier that he turned on messages from followers only, because then he would have missed this, missed Steve Harrington's little profile picture beaming up at him from the screen of his phone, along with a new message request.

”Jeff, I gotta go,” he says, not even realizing he's cut the other man off.

“Eddie, what-

”Harrington messaged me. I'll call you back.“

Eddie doesn't wait for a response as he hangs up on Jeff, and his hands definitely aren't shaking as he opens the message from Steve. And listen- Eddie is a fan of the guy, that much should be obvious. 

Steve had grown in popularity around the same time Corroded Coffin had; he’d gotten some part in a drama film that had skyrocketed him into stardom, and Eddie fell in love the moment he saw that gorgeous face on the silver screen for the first time. He's never had a chance to interact with the guy, has been in the same place a few times but always missed him, like ships passing in the night, but Eddie's been fine with pining from afar, just like every other person on the planet that's even remotely attracted to men.

Besides, even with how popular Corroded Coffin has gotten over the years - a couple of Grammy’s here, a dozen chart topping metal songs there - Eddie doesn’t expect Steve to just. Know who Eddie is.

With all of this in mind, Eddie is expecting some kind of semi-casual request to take the tweet down, that it's not a good look for his image-

Anything other than what Steve actually sent.

'If you're puppy baby boy, does that make me Master? Or Daddy?'

And Eddie- 

Eddie slides down, sinks into his couch cushion as all of the blood in his body suddenly shifts, rushing to fill his dick like it's a fucking race. The phone almost slips out of his hand and he fumbles it briefly before taking a deep breath. 

Is Steve serious? He wouldn't send that if he wasn't serious, right?

This could be it, could be Eddie's one chance to impress Steve, to get his foot in the door of Steve's interest. He bites his lip and types out a reply, something quick that he sends before he can change his mind.

‘I’m open to either, actually. Do you have a preference, sir?’

He doesn’t expect the typing indicator to come up immediately, and just knowing that Steve is somewhere right now, typing out a response to Eddie, is enough to have him nearly vibrating in his seat.

‘I’m partial to Daddy, myself.’

Fuck fuck fuck.

Eddie takes a breath, tries to think of a response that isn’t just ‘Please, Daddy, can I sit on your massive dick that I haven’t been able to stop thinking about since that one indie film you did that just had all of your junk out in the open?’

Steve saves him by sending another message.

‘But maybe we could start with Steve, and possibly dinner? Though I’d be happy to see where things go after that.’

He- What-

Eddie must have stopped breathing, because the next time he takes a breath his lungs burn, his mid races because there’s no way Eddie’s long term celebrity crush just asked him on a date. He sits there long enough that the screen goes dark and he scrambles to turn it back on, sees the message still there, real and unchanged.

There’s no way he can say no to this, to Steve, and his hands shake as he types out a response.

‘Dinner would be great. Just name the time and place, Daddy.’

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

one morning you cling to satoru’s back and sleepily plead for him not to leave for work and he feels closer to killing the higher ups than ever before

[ahaura]

im sure its been said already but as the election draws near more and more liberals will come out of the woodwork to shame people with a conscience to give away their vote to the democrats for free. i'm already seeing posts saying "why aren't people more concerned about a trump presidency?" you want to know why? it's because people already know he's bad. everyone already knows what he is and what he's done and what he'll do. there's nothing to discuss. he's a racist despotic worm of a man. there's nothing else to say.

biden is currently president. the genocide is happening under his watch. he's the one funding isra*l and arming them; he's sidestepped congress more than once to give them weapons. by oct. 27, the biden administration already knew that "Israel was regularly bombing buildings without solid intelligence that they were legitimate military targets." the state department/biden have engaged in atrocity propaganda, cast doubt on the legitimacy of the death toll recorded by the gaza health ministry, and so on. the united states is currently in the process of trying to pin the "war in gaza" on netanyahu (see sen. schumer's speech) after months of backing blatant genocide as a means to act as if they're "doing something" about the genocide (Instead of, say, threatening to cut off all aid to israel with the condition that all hostilities in gaza, the west bank, and occupied jerusalem are halted immediately and permanently, allowing palestinians freedom to travel, allowing aid into gaza, etc etc etc.)

the long and short of it is that liberals view their own lives as being worth more than palestinians'. that's it. they'll vote for another 4 years of the guy ushering in genocide and supporting apartheid + settler colonialism because he isn't outright attacking them (despite various laws and rulings happening both at the supreme court level and at the local level all over the country that will endanger people). they'll settle for the illusion of safety and security and shame anyone with a conscience and accuse them of "supporting the republicans" when in an actual democracy you would be able to use your vote as leverage to extract concessions from those who want to be elected. that's how it's supposed to fucking work.

democrats are not owed people's vote. if biden loses, it will be biden's fault; it will be his campaign's fault; it will be the democrats' fault. trump is bad; the republicans are bad. we already know this. this is not an endorsement of either. but if democrats are too cowardly and feckless and servile to the motivations of the american empire and never do anything for their constituents then why the fuck should anyone vote for them. you want to get mad at someone, why don't you do something useful and stop worrying about team-sports with a purely selfish basis and start hounding the people in power who are supposed to serve you, the voter.

[calware]

genuinely what is the worst that could happen if you stop apologizing for liking homestuck or if you stop saying things like "homestuck is cursed don't read it it's so bad don't make the same mistakes as me save yourself while you can etc etc" when in actuality you enjoyed it. what's the worst that will happen if you just enjoy it like a normal person

[moonlightdancer26]

Sometimes I forget how young Snape was in Philospher’s Stone, I always see people saying “17/20 years ago” when referring to Lily’s death or SWM happening. So I always immediately think of him as being in his mid thirties all throughout the books, while forgetting that he was actually 31 in the first book. Lily’s death had just occurred 10 years ago, and then he was forced to teach her child who looked exactly like the man he hated most but also had her eyes. Damn.

[a2zillustration]

I've been waiting for an excuse to tell you why Croissant is called Croissant for SO LONG

| First | | Previous | | Next |

[[ All Croissant Adventures (chronological, desktop) ]]

[[ All Croissant Adventures (app) ]]

[greykolla-art]

I heard that our dear @beansprean was sick, so I thought it would be nice to dedicate to them a smutty little vampire comic!

(My dude-gender neutral- your stamina for creating so much awesome art and comics is inspiring as hell! I hope you take care of yourself!🖤)

[screechingfromthevoid]

Orym is giving very "I have fallen in love again and that feels like a betrayal to my dead husband" energy.

He's also giving "I care so much about my friends and I have to protect them but the love I have for one is so strong that it's distracting me AND it's not fair to the others"

Like there is so much love contained in the Orym and also so much guilt.

[zorosdimples]

there seems to be this common sentiment that you’re only allowed to feel lonely when you’re physically isolated—when you don’t have friends, when you’re estranged from family, etc. but the truth is that loneliness is much more of a mental struggle—a frame of mind—than it is a physical state of being or a verifiable fact.

for example: think about a point in your life where you have felt incredibly and all-consumingly alone. sure, maybe you didn’t have many people around you. but i’m also willing to bet that there was at least one person in your life that cared—be it a friend or a partner or a teacher. but you didn’t confide in or open up to anyone because you either 1. were embarrassed; 2. thought they wouldn’t understand; or 3. didn’t want to be a burden.

none of these hang-ups are indicative of us actually having no one to speak to—no loved ones to comfort us. rather, they’re our own mental struggles which reflect our personal insecurities and emotions. at the end of the day, having friends around you doesn’t mean that you can’t (or won’t) have days where you feel isolated. you can have a sea of friends and family and mentors who adore you; but they can’t exactly reach out to that solitary place in your mind.

it’s silly to gatekeep feelings of isolation, especially on the internet. when people bring up “cliques” on tumblr, it’s usually rooted in a place of insecurity—one that we can all empathize with, as social media tends to exacerbate our personal feelings of inadequacy. but also, these individuals are generally pointing to small friend groups. a group friends isn’t inherently cliquish, because calling them such would mean that they are at their root exclusionary.

defining inclusivity within an online space is difficult, but often, people are quick to cry “clique” without any nuance. if someone is kind to you, i wouldn’t call that exclusionary behavior—would you? are they barring you from public spaces? are they actively targeting or harassing you? if not, your feelings are exactly that: your feelings. we can’t project our insecurities onto others and assume the worst; we need to give others the benefit of the doubt. we all have lives offline that are often more difficult than we will ever divulge.

i guess what i’m trying to say is that while we all are allowed to (and do, at times) feel lonely, we are each responsible for regulating our own emotions. going out of your way to blame others for your problems—when you have no evidence, no established patterns of behavior to reference—is childish. instead, let’s assume good intent, love on one another, and always be open to growth.

[prettymediocrewizard]

quick grimmer sketching from memory ˊᵕˋ

[spacedlexi]

maybe if i just put these screenshots together youll understand why i think their relationship just Works so well as it pertains to the characters and themes of S4 in general

neither of them know what theyre doing, but theyre figuring it out Together. the old ways are dead. and together theyll build a new future thats worth fighting for

[ratcandy]

collection of moth things i never posted all of varying quality and age

[acebytaemin]

[end of an era]: closing #analook

first of all, i want to say thank you times five billion to everyone who’s ever tagged me in a post. it goes without saying that i have enjoyed every single one of them and will treasure this entire experience and all the beautiful creations i’ve gotten to see (and discuss in great lengths in the tags of course 🤭). now, that’s partly the reason why i feel like i should wrap it up - you all create such wonderful things and they all deserve my full attention and all the yapping i can muster yet sadly just don’t have the time to type up. it’s silly how much it’s meant to me (i might be tearing up a little) and how much i’m going to miss it, but i really do think it’s for the best. of course, feel free to @ me or send me any post of yours in the future - you know i’ll respond with enthusiasm. though it won’t come close to a gif/edit/artwork, i’ve typed up little thank-you notes to the main contributors to #analook as a token of my gratitude under the cut. love & appreciate you all SO so so so much! 💖

@atlantis-area - my dearest alexa, the reason i even started a user tag and got to experience all this, thank you The most 💖 hopefully you already know how grateful i am for you, so i won’t make it too long. it’s been a pleasure (and will continue to be) to watch your giffing style evolve and to get to be a fan of taemin alongside you. love you! 🩵

@herewegobebe - oh my darling ru where do i start 🥹 i’m soooo so thankful for your wonderful presence and your gifs (as ive already told you numerous times). you’ve been a real highlight of my tag (it’s still a bit of a starstruck moment for me to be your mutual/get tagged in your gifs tbh!) and it’s going to make me really really sad to potentially miss some of your gifs now but best believe i’ll be checking ur blog whenever i can 🙂‍↕️💖

@minhosblr - MAJA my number one gorgeous wino gif source i literally can’t believe you even tagged me in them to begin with i feel like it’s all been such a successful fan moment 🥹🐰����🏻 thank you so so much & ofc expect me all up in your tags regardless 😽💓

@kimsuyeon - my lili the absolute master of gifs with gorgeous quality and beautiful coloring and stunning women like you can truly do no wrong in my books anytime i see a gif of yours i get giddy and feel like cracking my knuckles and going IN in the tags. thank you soooo much for gracing me (and everyone else) w your gorgeous gifs 💝

@pink-vacancy - the way im going to miss yuna & mina served on a beautiful platter cannot be overstated.. thank you so much for adding a beautiful touch of cherry red spice to my tag 🙂‍↕️🍒💋 (and kinda beside the point but also for always being SO incredibly sweet & nice to me)

@faunandfloraas - jess my third favorite australian 🤭💕 your creativity and collecting moments/pulling parallels + funny tags have brought me very many giggles, thank you saaaaur much 😽💕

@chanrizard - sa thank you soooo much for my chan gif fixes 💖 and SORRY for all the stuff you’ve had to read in your tags and still tagging me regardless lmfaojfkdjdk you best believe you’ll keep on reading them as i’ll be a frequent visitor of your blog from now on 🫡

@rainknow - your art has been one my favorite things to find in my tag, thank you so so so much for using it! most wonderful capturing of lino i’ve ever seen, no one does his eyes justice like you do 😽💖 (pls if you ever feel like it and i don’t see a post of ur art mention me or send it to me - it’d be highly appreciated!)

@linoyes - thank you SO much for amping up the amount of linos in my tag, it’s been such a delight to see your giffing evolve and im excited to keep yapping in your tags in the future 🤭💞💞💞

@jonghyunluvr - your jjong/taemin posts are always so enjoyable, i love your insights and how you notice the same things as me sometimes hehe 🩵🩵 please do keep sending them to me by all means 😌

@shorelinnes - raf pleaseeee if you want to still send me or tag me in your art.. i’d be so sad to miss it and your gorgeous gifs too! im so very happy to have you around and i appreciate all the posts you’ve tagged me in so so much 💞

@strayklds - em i remember being nervoussss to ask you to tag me hdksjdk i think your gifs are so good and want to thank you Very much for tagging me in them! it’s really been a pleasure 🫶🏻

@briankang - TAY my minchan friend and my bangchan gifs supplier you best believe i’ll be checking your blog 🤭 thank you SO much for all you’ve tagged me in so far 💖 (still thinking abt your minchan ate teasers edits.. changed my life now idk if for the better or worse but. lives have been changed for sure)

@taeiltual - bex your gorgeous edits truly make me think that most of these companies truly need to do better, thank you so much for making everyone look more beautiful and tagging me along (hehe) for the ride! 💖

@ashmp3 @kissoflifes - thank you two SO much for using my tag as intended and for the highest purpose of all - in your gorgeous selfies! (& thank you zaynab for your beautiful gifs too ofc ofc) for sure still send them to me if i happen to miss them we Do Nottt want a tragedy like that to ever strike. love u my beautiful friends 💞💞

@28reas0ns - not directly related to my tag (though you did tag me in a couple of beautiful sets!) but just wanted to once again thank you for my header gif(s) i’ll really treasure them for a long time 💝

and a shoutout to everyone who’s tagged me in a few of their posts, thank you thank you thank you from the bottom of my heart! it’s really felt special every single time and i can’t thank you all enough for thinking of me and inviting me to yap in your tags like one would a vampire into their home. MWAH appreciate you all soooo so much 💖💖💖:

@reiiofsunn 💖 @drzephyr 💖 @hyunjinsource 💖 @minho-knows 💖 @speakofcompersion 💖@linolinoing 💖 @sunugf 💖

[kinokoshoujoart]

CORRECT TAGS‼️‼️‼️‼️ @rn0na-lizard you are so so so correct….. my favorite ‘Normal Girl’ in hmds…….i almost never see anyone talk about these aspects of her let alone also love her for them as they should.

i feel like Leona/ DS lumina gets mischaracterized super often which is understandable bc out of all the DS candidates leona is the least like her ancestor (who i also love, for different reasons).

in AWL lumina was the only kid in the valley for a very long time, but many of the DS residents have lived in the valley their whole lives. while lumina had accepted her role as a proper young heiress by chapter 3 of AWL— and when DS begins Leona already at this point of her life— lumina still had a lingering sense of uncertainty and angst and loneliness and doubt, and unresolved worries about her parents. absolutely none of this is present with leona

in this world leona starts with Lumina’s 22 year old appearance, she’s just rich as hell and living her best life (as she deserves), she’s unabashedly shallow, puts herself first always, speaks so politely and affably yet she can be so casually cruel in the most genuine cute way and out of touch with reality and and i fucking love her and i’d die for her. my beloved girlboss girlkeep girlypop

more iconic Leona Moments

when muu/muffy asks for beauty advice leona’s recommendation is “this brand of mail order beauty cream is simply divine! and it was quite inexpensive too, just 100,000 G 🥰” everyone else looks uncomfortable and muu is like “you’re as frivolous as always….”

aside from the 3 who take literally half your money (Witch💖, moi, and thomas) leona and panama (romana) take the most money from you if they carry you home when you faint. just a couple of girl bosses holding on to their girlpire (btw shout out to sebastian, the only resident in the entire valley who carries you home for free)

neither panama nor leona attend the harvest festival, they send sebastian there by himself to test the food first lmao (if you poison it like the witch they’re harboring on their property requires you to do, sebastian is just like “i can’t serve this to Mistress Panama…”)

once again sebastian attacks mukumuku for her sake, this time not to make her a paintbrush but she told him to get her the best slippers and this was apparently the easiest way. sebastian gets fucking mauled btw

leona has hands down the best romance route in hmds. all her scenes are incredible but god the slow burn friends to lovers with your DVD player….

in her purple heart event she shows up at your house because she heard you have a DVD player, asks you to show her how it works, and then just leaves after she’s done playing with it

in her yellow heart event she has sebastian fetch van so she can buy a DVD player for herself but van’s like “i’m so sorry …. Pete… bought the last one….”

leona is so unable to stomach the idea of other people having things she doesn’t that she starts to cry and the only way to placate her is to tell her she can go to your house anytime she wants just so she can use your DVD player. that’s not a setup to a budding romance that’s her final heart event

it’s the most incredible romance arc in the world like girl you have infinite money you can just. buy a DVD player somewhere else?? “i want to watch DVDs at my house just like you!” leona you have three entire bedrooms

“rich girl love interest who has everything except love, win her heart by having genuine conversation with her”: done to death, tired, i don’t have time for that

“rich girl love interest who has everything except a fucking DVD player, win her heart by giving her expensive stuff and ‘relax tea’ and access to your DVD player”: audacious, intriguing, never been done before, innovative

if you deny her god-given right to access your DVD player she is like “Is that so……………Just let me be alone for a little bit.” incredible tragedy i understand. take as much time as you need to grieve darling

oh but her first heart event asks you to pick a side in an argument she’s having with panama and the correct answer is to say “sebastian is the one who’s wrong” (sebastian has said nothing wrong this whole time and yet both of them have just been yelling at him to shut up)

and her blue heart event is “help me find this heirloom necklace… boohoo…” and when you find it she’s like “perfect! now grandma won’t get mad at me. hmm, you seem pretty dependable…♡” augh she’s way too good at this…….!!! i’ll do anything for you!

when you propose she says “of course, i always dreamed of having a romance and a wedding♡” and says nothing abt how she feels about you <3

also if you marry her, once a week she goes to hang out at her ex love interest’s place for 6 hours straight and comes home saying “whew… i had so much fun that i must have lost track of time… i’ll hurry on home”

if you marry another girl she starts flirting with you like “I’m so envious of your wife, having such a fine husband… Pete.” (or whatever your name is)

i’ve become obsessed with her and romeo’s horrible trainwreck soap opera marriage since replaying cute in jp… it’s SO… i have so much to say about them that it should be its own post but i’ll just give the cliffnotes

shotgun wedding vibes. romeo is surprised by his own wedding. they’re childhood friends but he himself has never considered marrying her. her words to him at their wedding are “Make me happy♡” (command)

she understandably can’t stand his terrible table manners or his clothes or anything about him (except that she wants to watch him surf and have his child. but he instead walks in circles all day. coward) and he’s both really good at accidentally stepping on landmines and just ever so slightly majorly terrified of her after marriage (“but surely her angry outbursts are just her way of showing love hahahahaha” you’re going to die. she’s going to kill you). the only positive things they say about their marriage are extremely shallow. they can’t communicate with each other because romeo always says the Dumbest Shit obliviously and leona always responds by cutting him out of her life forever!!!!!! (for 5 seconds) while he has no idea what happened

they are both so melodramatic and they both just do nothing except make each other worse and run away from each other and push each other away but they can’t escape each other. neither of them ever has to grow or change if they marry each other because an elderly overworked man is sustaining both of their existences and neither of them can take care of themselves and i love them your honor

also romeo’s first crush as a kid was apparently her mom, and if leona falls for YOU she flirts by mentioning that sebastian says you look like the spitting image of her dead father. dear fucking god

they’re the epitome of “You're both just enabling each other's mental illnesses. You're both perfect for each other. Never change. Just never involve anybody else in what you've got going on.”

romeo really does feel like her stupid lackey. like the karen to her regina. they even had this dynamic in the games they played as kids… she was the Harvest Goddess and he was Servant A/Minion A (they might still be playing this game as adults…he calls her lady/mistress sometimes after marriage…)

btw leona’s best friend (wife) marivia is also just as… there’s an event where they just gossip about all the mineral town ppl and marivia says ann would win a gluttony contest and they both giggle

there’s also an event where marivia casually walks into Witch’s hut and just interviews her so she can write her into a novel. witch is left completely drained by this exchange. leona and marivia both are so chill about the horrible cruel villainess living in leona’s shed who wants the town poisoned and rewards you for killing animals and hurting yourself and is putting curses on everyone (and they’re right. she’s never done anything wrong in her life)

[manygreetingsfriend]

i’m sooooooo normal about the god of war series. so incredibly normal i liked it a normal amount and would be so chill talking about it. don’t worry about the sign