#but hey thats fine ill just use my phone number oh its still my old one that doesnt fucking work

[notquitehuman-creations]

FUCK APPLE I HATE THEM SO FUCKING MUCH

[nikrangdan]

cafeworker!ni-ki

pairing: cafeworker!ni-ki x female reader

genre: fluff, comedy

description: the cashier at the new coffee shop was so adorable you just couldn’t resist visiting just for him

**did not proofread

————

contrary to popular belief, you were NOT a social person

whenever you were around friends and family, you were always the loudest person there

like SHUT UP Y/N!!!!!!

anyways although you were loud, people still enjoyed being around you because you had such a sweet soul and interesting humor

everyone close to you knew that you hated talking to people you didnt know

but to all the strangers? no

they would think you were an outgoing ready-to-meet-new-people extrovert

which was so, so wrong

but ALAS, you had to talk strangers almost everyday living in 2020

(well lets pretend we arent in the middle of a pandemic right now)

moving on......

so you were in high school at the downfall of your existence

you used to have so many friends when you were younger ..now you only have like 3

and those three were always busy (busy making up excuses thats for sure) so you never really hung out with them outside of school

and on one fine evening after school you decided to visit the new cafe 5 minutes from your house

u were really excited because all the cafes were 15 minutes from your house so now u could just walk to this one if u wanted to !!!

but yeah it was in the middle of a small plaza that had cute buildings

you pulled up to the parking lot and was just about to get out the car when u remembered..

u have to talk to the cashier :/

who’s a stranger! even more ://

it was always so weird to you.. whenever you went out you always had someone else order for you because you just hated talking to strangers

you just felt uncomfortable and you couldnt help it

its not like you have never ordered for yourself but you would always prefer not to

and now that you think about it

this is the first time you have gone out by yourself

you did text one of your friends beforehand but they said they “had homework to do”

LIES!!!!

but you really wanted to try the coffee so you just ran with it

time to face your fears!

you opened the glass door to reveal a cute looking cafe, like the ones you’d see in movies

you loved it already

glancing to the cashier you’d have to be talking to—

hold on

you had to do a double take because WOAH.....

the cashier...

he....

wow..

you have never seen a boy like that in your life

you stood there for like 3 seconds before coming to your senses and standing infront of the menu

that was infrONT OF HIM

“hi, what can i get for you?”

HIS VOICE OH MY GOD..!?!?!

“oh um.. can i get a second to .. look..?”

“yeah of course,” he gestured to the menu on the wall above him

hes so nice u almost cried

your eyes shakily traveled up to the chalkboard menu and u began to ‘read’ the options

its like u could feel his eyes on u WTF!!!!

um um um *internally keyboard smashes*

you couldnt even think

the words on the menu were like gibberish

the ONE time u go out by yourself

this had to happen.. of course! someone had it out for you, you were sure of it >:(

picking a random drink you gave him your order

“uh can i have an iced caramel macchiato?”

ITS LIKE YOU CANT SAY A SENTENCE WITHOUT UH OR UM

u cant help but think hes judging you

he looks like that while u are standing there in old sweatpants your dads tshirt

“sure, what size?” he looks into your eyes after putting your order into the machine

god you felt your heart stop

his Eyes..... theyre so beautiful

“oh um regular” you attempted to give a small smile

hopefully it looked like one

“okay that’ll be $5.12.”

you dug out some cash from your bag and handed it to him

he gave u your change and gave u a small smile

“your drink will be out in a minute”

AAAAA

he went :)

he is so CUTE.....?!?!

he looked around your age too

sigh... you knew he was way out of your league though

you were gushing over him but he probably thought you were just another boring customer

while waiting u sat at one of the 2 person tables on your phone

and u IMMEDIATELY went to text your groupchat

‘GUYS’

‘AT THE CAFE NEAR MY HOUSE’

‘CUTEST BOY IVE EVER SEEN EVER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE’

‘WTF IM GONNA CRY HOW DOES HE EXIST’

‘WAIT BRB HE S COMIBBG’

you tried to quickly put your phone down without looking suspicious when you saw him walking towards you with a drink in his hand

“here you go, enjoy” he said before swiftly making his way back to the counter and talking to the other worker there

wow... hes so mesmerizing

you’d steal glances at him every now and then while taking sips of your drink

you were sitting there for like 20 minutes before you noticed you finished your drink

you totally forgot you came here to see how good their coffee was

it was good by the way

sadly it was your time to leave

taking one last glance at him, you threw away your empty cup and walked out the door

wow

u cant believe you got to witness the most beautiful human being ever

in your small town?? crazy

you were sitting in your car just thinking

WAIT

U DIDNT EVEN KNOW HIS NAME!

you mentally punched yourself but then you started laughing

what does knowing his name even matter, its not like u were ever going to talk to him anyway

LOL

*sad emoji*

but the coffee was good so you definitely planned to go back

and not just because of the cute boy

...unless....

*time skip*

the next day you went there was a week later at the same time in hopes that he was working the same shift

AND HE WAS!!!!

score! 1 for y/n, 0 for umm... any other person who had a crush on him too i guess

the cafe didnt have too many people since it was fairly new and also in a small part of the city

so when you went in, you were the only one there along with the two workers

“welcome, what would you like to order?”

NOT THIS AGAIN

he looked even cuter today

his messy blond hair almost covered his eyes

you shouldve forced your friend to come with you this time

you ordered the same thing as last time but this time he asked for your name

hmmm

“um y/n” you answered

your heart was always beating 2 times as fast whenever you had to talk to him

he wrote it down on the cup and after you paid, you went to sit down at the same spot as last time

looking at him is literally the highlight of your day

the same thing happened as last time, he came over and gave you your drink without giving u a second glance

>:((((

boooo look at me cute boy

nonetheless u continued going to the cafe at the same time as much as u could which was like three times a week

literally over a month later and u dont think anythings going to happen

u punch yourself for thinking the boy would somehow find interest in you

hes still indifferent to you which isn’t surprising since you’ve never made any kind of move

ever

but

he should know u by now

hopefully..

*time skip again*

it was a saturday

at this point you’ve basically given up on having a crush on him and now since its become a routine u just say you go for the coffee

not really paying attention to your surroundings you dont notice that the boy at the cash register isnt the normal one you see almost everyday

“hey, what would you like to order?”

woah WHAT

you look up from your bag to notice a boy that was definitely not the one that normally stood infront of it at this time

and you also noticed something on this new cashier

a name tag

how come your old little crush didnt have one????

this new boys name was ‘jay’ and he was fairly cute too

looking around the corner at the other worker u noticed he has a name tag too

you recognized him because he was always working when the cute boy was at the cash register

his name was ‘heeseung’

after taking in these new additions you answered to jay

“oh um.. can i ge-,”

“she gets an iced caramel macchiato. her name is y/n”

??!<_|#%[>~€\£~

you whipped your head around so fast to see who said that behind you

was it who you thought it was ??!??!

YES IT WAS!!!!

OH MYGOD

ITS HIM

you widened your eyes at the boy who wasnt wearing his normal black and white uniform

instead he was wearing black ripped jeans and a gray hoodie

wow....... and u thought he couldnt look any better

BUT OMG?? HE REMEMBERS U

“oh wow ni-ki, you know her?” the boy named jay asked him

“uh yeah.. shes a regular” he said before walking to stand next to you

NI-KI

HIS NAME IS NI-KI OHMHGOD

u thought his name fit him perfectly its so CUTE

“are you gonna get something too?”

this whole time you were silent because.. what is going on

your heart was being SO fast you thought that everyone could hear it

“yup, can i get the same thing? also im paying for both of us”

WHAT??/):)/$;##\%|

ur eyes widened even more it looked like they were gonna pop out of its sockets

u unconsciously leaned towards the boy next you and kind of put your hands up

“w-what?? oh um no, you dont have to do that” you nervously said to him as he looked down at you

he kind of had a smile on his face

“i want to.”

there is no way this is happening

“oiiii ni-ki” jay chuckled while punching in numbers on the cash register

“ill have both of your drinks out soon, you two kids have fun!” jay said before turning around to face heeseung

WHAT??!!??!

your jaw almost dropped from shock

millions of thoughts ran through your brain and you couldnt even process anything

u cant believe this was happening

it was like a wattpad story or something.. is this how u meet ur soulmate

your thoughts were interrupted by a hand on your back momentarily and u look to see ni-ki shyly grinning and gesturing u towards a table

no way...

you awkwardly follow him to a 2 person table next to wall and sit down

you literally could not hear anything except for the pounding of your heart

“uh sorry about that...” he rubbed his neck and sheepishly smiled

“im ni-ki by the way”

“y/n...” u felt so awkward u wanted to cry

“agh, im really sorry if that was weird.. i just didnt know how to ask you out.....” he trailed off

*passes out*

IM JOKING

Ok but u felt ur heart stop bc NO WAY

“wait what??” u ask, ur eyes bigger than the moon

“um yeah... haha i took the day off today to try to talk to you.. sorry if that was weird..”

HE WAS SO AWKWARD JUST LIKE YOU IT WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER

“no its okay!! im glad actually...”

“really? so is it okay if we hang out?” he asked excitedly

u did not think u could handle HOW CUTE THIS BOY WAS O M G...

“of course! sorry if im kind of awkward though” you gave a small smile

“its okay, i think i am too”

you two began talking about the cafe and where you went to school

turns out even though you two lived in the same town (literally 5 minutes away from eachother) u went to different schools for some reason

u talked for like 2 minutes before jay walked up with your drinks

“hows it going guys?”

“its doing good bro, now go away..” ni-ki lightly shoved jay and laughed

you giggled at the sight

jay looked offended and came right back

“that is not how you talk to your elders ni-ki! y/n do you see this?!” he scoffed

ni-ki just rolled his eyes and turned back to you

“do not ignore me young man!” jay joked

“oh y/n, ive heard all about you from ni-ki over here by the way.”

ni-ki’s eyes got so big you almost got worried

he turned around so fast and gave jay one of those ‘i swear if you say anything ur dead meat’ looks

jay obviously did not care

“hes always like ‘y/n this y/n that’ blah blah im glad he finally got the balls to ask you out because im honestly sick of hearing it!” jay laughed

u were blushing so hard

NI-KI LIKED U????

this felt like a dream

ni-ki pushed jay away so hard and turned back with red cheeks

awe

but yeah that was the beginning of the cutest relationship ever

u and ni-ki were so cute together <333

you’d always visit him during ur free time

it took like 2 months before u two made it official tho

and he was the sweetest boyfriend ever

[bakugoubabygirl]

           okay before I start she going to choose one. Don't worry if its not the one you wanted her to choose bc its going to be  a Roller coaster  of emotions and a lot of back and forth for awhile  BC I FUCKING LOVE BOTH  OF THESES BOYS. also  there will be smut soon and it wont be vanilla .  

                                                        YOUR POV

          "Lets go before they find us" I whispered tugging on Bakugou arm.  He didn't say a word and followed me.  " Lets get some food at the stand" I gave him smile. Bakugou followed me he seem kind of moody though more moody then usual .           " Are you going to say yes?" Was he asking about tododroki. I didn't give much thought to that . I like him  a lot but if I was being honest with myself i had feelings for someone else.       " I dont know I like him a lot and i think it would be amazing. But i also think I have feelings for someone else. To be fair they haven't shown no sign of returning this feeling. Maybe I ought to say yes and forget about the other guy like that" I admitted.        " Who is this other guy" He asked. Why was he so damn interested and how can i tell him its him.         "Not telling" I felt my face getting red. Next thing I Knew I was getting pinned against a wall.           " Tell me" He growled. Why was this bothering him so much. If only he knew that telling him would ruin our friend ship . He would never look at me the way I look at him. because I was made to  be the villan.  Bakugou strive to be perfect at everything and I was not perfect.           " Bakugou Its you stupid" Then I broke free from his grasp . I didn't want t o know his reaction or have him mocked me. I hurried and disappear into the crowd.    Still haven't found any thing to eat my tummy started growl. When I heard my name being called out, The next thing I knew someone dragged me off  somewhere quite. I'm so sick of being pulled around today. It was my dad, Honestly I was relived that it  wasn't Bakugou .        " Hey  I know you and how your going to give it all but You need to make sure your head is clear. Ive been studying and your powers  feed off you emotions.  I want to make sure you have a clear head" he said worriedly .  OH god I'm screwed my head is far  from clear.         "  Yeah I'm not focusing on anything right now except for winning" I said and I fake smiled.          " that's Great I Know your going to make me proud. I may be rooting midoryia but Your my number one and I hope you win more." He smiled. Pulled me and for a hug.           " Thank you dad and don't worry Ill cut all there throats open" I laughed.      Then it was time to to go back to the arena.  Time  to face bakugou mental and physical . I think mentally would be harder to do.  Midnight call me and bakugou to fight first.  I try not to think about what had conspire between us earlier. I need to focus to keep my head cleared.              We both step into the ring. Bakugou goes to attack me and I dodge it just in time. Then I Blast one of my purple fire balls at him and he dodge to . This was really upsetting, and I  Take one of my shadow hands out and it wraps around his body. I started to think about how he never loses. He was perfect and every way and would make a fine super hero one day.   something you'll never be  the voice was back again.  

                                                 Bakugou  POV

She had her hand wrapped around me. I  had to escape and then I saw  Her starting to levitate off the ground. Her eyes flash purple there was a gasp from the crowd.  She slam hard into the ground  with the shadow hand. She was Going to kill me.        I jump up and fired another explosion at her this time using more force.  She shield it and then made a big shadowy fist at the ground causing it to erupt . I almost fell but then I caught my balance.  This time I used my full force now that I knew it wouldn't hurt her too bad.       The explosion was so big she couldn't shield it. She was on the ground and lay there for several of seconds.  I walked over her to see if I have won and if she was okay. She started to get back up again and she grabbed a whole of me again.      She grabbed me so tight with the shadow arm I couldn't breath.  My face started to turn purple I was pretty sure I was going to die.  The crowed was screaming to let me go But she wouldn't listen.   " Y/n Please let me go I cant breathe" I try to say but she didn't hear or listen. She wouldn't do this on purpose.  Something was seriously wrong . this was not her. " Y/n Please I love you" at that point I didn't fucking care if the whole crowed thought I was a simp . I love her and I need her to came back. Her eyes turn back to e/c when I said that.    " Bakugou" she gasps and then dropped me. I could barley move I'm pretty sure she won but she just stared at me. Her eyes started to tear up. " I give up" she yelled. Then ran out of the arena . They announced me winner and The nursing girl came to heal up my minor wounds.  I was livid that I won that way. She threw the fight.

                                                                   Y/N POV

     I Brought shame on my dad and my school. I brought shame on myself. The whole world watch it happen too. They watch me turn into a monster. I almost killed bakugou and He never going to want anything to do with me again. I sat outside the stadium on the ground.  I'm no hero I cant even go and face what I done.       I must of sat there for hours and hours. It was finally dark and everyone left. it started  to  pour down rain.   I decided to go back into the arena to pick up my bag and stuff.  It was dark except for a couple security lights. I found my bag when I heard a familiar voice.       " Tch where did you go?" Bakugou asked. Was he still talking to me.        " heard you won congratulation"  I gave him a smile. The air was so cold I could see my own breath. 

                                            BAKUGOU POV 

 " THATS NOT HOW I WANTED TO WIN" he yelled. " YOU GAVE UP THAT FIGHT WAS YOURS"        " I almost killed you .  I was created for one reason and one reason only. The whole now know so to. I let you guys down and I let my dad down. How can I be the princess of peace when I cant even find peace in my own head.  I'm done," I said  tears started to pour out my eyes.        " IF i was the bad guy you would of won. Your powerful and just because its hard your going to pack up then Your not who I thought you were " he scoffed.         " I almost kill you and maybe next time I will. I care about you too much for that to happen" I cried. I started to turn away.  He grabbed my wrist and pulled me agaisnt him.        " I know you wont. You stop because your good and you over came it. we just have to work on it. Please stay if not for yourself then the million you could save with that power.         " I dont know how I stopped myself. All I remeber is blacking out and then waking to see me almost killing youself." I explain.             " I said something to you and then you just snapped out of it" He said nervously .              " Oh well what did you say" I asked.  This could help me find the answer.      " I told you I Love you"  He blushed. This was a side of him I never seen before. I think im falling to. Todoroki was important to me but in the end bakugou been here.  I wasnt sure if I was ready to say it back. I grabbed his face and kiss him. He started kissing back first it was soft but then its starts to get more rough and passionate. He grabbed my ass and pulled me agaisnt him. despite the freezing rain , I felt warm.               He pulled away but remain eye contact with me as he pulled something out of his of his jacket. It was a small box and he handed it to me. " I wanted to give this to you when I ask you out after I won the festival correctly . That didn't go as I plan but I still want to win your heart. please accept this and be my girl. I never done this soft shit and I'm sorry if it not something I'm going to show everyday. Your worth taking my pride down a little I guess" His face was red.       I open it up and it was a sliver bracelet with his name on it and diamonds. It was beautiful and way too much. I had no idea what to say. " Yes Ill be yours" he pulled me into a tight  hug.      " lets go to my place you need to get out of the rain and getting late" he said gently. It almost scared me the way he was being so kind.                                                                      Bakugou POV         We arrived at my place. She look like she was about to past out. Today was a lot on all of us. I didn't really won the sports festival but at least I won the girl. I just got to keep that damn icy hot away from her. I wanted to rip the necklace off of her that he gave her. She mine now.        " Hey you stupid bitch your late" my mom bitch. No good job bakugou or nothing.         " Fuck you too hoe" I said back flipping her off. She was about to really yell, until she saw Y/n  come in after me.             " Hey Y/n nice to see you again. I saw you tonight you should of just kill him and not worry about it' she laugh. The fucking old hag meant as a joke. Y/n face turn white though.  I grabbed her hand and lead her up to my bedroom. She seem like she was still half in a daze.        " Lets get out of these wet clothes. You can wear anything of mine for now." I said awkwardly. I knew we were dating but I didn't know her boundaries . There so much I want to do with her. She needed sleep tonight though. we both did.   she started to strip off in my room.  Oh, she wasn't paying attention to anything really. I couldn't help but to watch in amazement though. She took  off her clothes and strip down till she was naked. I had to use all my self control to not do anything. then she put on one of my T-shirts that looked like a dress on her and then a pair of my boxers.  I strip down to nothing and but my boxers and laid on my bed.     " come here princess" I yawned. She crawled into bed and laid on top of me. She feel asleep instantly but then here phone started going off. I  Pick it up and looks at it.  Deku: hey are you alright. Me and your dad are really worried.    Damn deku fucking worrying about my girl. I didn't want to give her a dad the pro hero a reason to hate me though. Me: yeah I'm fine just staying at a friend house. I'm really sleepy so I'm going to go to bed.   Then there was other messages on the screen so I looked. Todo: hey  Y/n I'm so worried about you. When you see this please answer and I was wondering if we could meet up tomorrow to talk about today and I have something I wanna ask you. I hope your safe and sleeping well beautiful. Oh hell  no. She mine and he going to back the fuck off.  I took a pictures of her sleeping on my chest and I sent it. Me: she mine and she sleeping fine thank you. Back the fuck off  she mine now!!!!!! Todo: I see for now that may be it. I don't give up and I especially wont stop until she mine. You well slip and when you do ill be there for her. Your impulsive and abusive and don't deserve her. Me: You come any where near her your dead I blocked his number from her phone.  I wrapped my arms tight around her and I pass out.    The sun filled the room waking me up. She was still asleep. She was so beautiful and peaceful when she sleep.  Her phone started buzzing causing her to wake.   " Where my phone" she sat up straight looking for it. I handed it to her. The number didn't have a caller id. She scrunch her nose in confusion.     " Hello who is this " she answered.      " Todoroki, are you alright?" I heard him answered.  Great rich boy has more then one phone.     " Yes, what happen to your old phone number?"      " Long story, where are you at?"     " Bakugou house, why whats wrong?" she asked worriedly     " Ill be there In 20" he said and then hung up.  " Do you have anything else I can where by chance?" she asked   " I think you look fine in that Idiot" I snorted grabbing her wait.   " I cant go out like this" she said digging though the bag of mina and kiri clothes that they leave here.      " Your not going anywhere with him and no way in hell wearing that" She hold up a short pink dress of mina. Mina was shorter then Y/n so this dress was gonna not cover anything. She took off my shirt and put on the dress anyways not listening to me at all.    She grabbed my hair brush and tied it back out her face. she look stunning even though she didn't try and its for him.  " I fucking mean it your not going anywhere with him" I yelled.   " Chill out you have to trust me. He one of my friends and I'm yours so don't worry" she said try reassuring me. I almost lost her to him though. He going to try all Kinds of flirty shit. I cant be okay with this but I have too. She will leave if I'm too controlling.   " One hour then come back" I grumbled.  " I have to go home afterwards and talk to my dad" She sigh. She was right even though I wanted some time with her. The door bell ring and I hurried up to open it. IT was half and half baster.   " Leave your hands off of her and no flirty shit or I will Murder you" I screamed and then Y/n push me put of the way. I grabbed her and kiss her so fucking hard in front of him. She push me away and laughed.     " I'm sorry about him" she said. Walking out of the door with him. I kept trying to talk myself out of following them. I decided to invite shitty hair over to distract me.

IM open up to ideas and or request for my one shot books I'm doing. Thank you for read part 7 will be here Thursday at the latest

[yikeswtfmate]

(1) New Message from Unknown Number

main masterlist // (1) New Message Masterlist // next part

Summary: Y/N is drunk and can’t remember her ex’s number.

A/N: Hello, it is I, the idiot who writes Social Media AUs when she’s drunk but is too lazy to put them in the proper format and just leaves them to die somewhere on her laptop

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (Social Media AU - that’s a lie, it’s actually just texts in Word format 🤡)

Warnings: swearing, dumbassery

Unknown Number: Hey asshat so listen

Unknown Number: I kno we hvnt spoken since like

Unknown Number: High school but whateve idc

Unknown Number: U’re an asshle so I dnt even care that its like…

Unknown Number: 3 in the morning nvrmd

Unknown Number: Ive ben dared to txt my hottest ex by these evil witchS so

Unknown Number: Here u go

Unknown Number: At least u had decent abs so congrats on tht jfc

Unknown Number:  also u dnt get to complain abt this txt bc like

Unknown Number: u dated me for 6 months on a dare so U KNOW WHat this shuold feel like ya

Unknown Number: Wow dude that sounds like a dick move

Unknown Number: Seriously who the hell dates someone for 6 months on a dare?

Unknown Number: Doesn’t that only happen in movies though?

Unknown Number: hey bitchass dont act like u don’t kno what im talkinG abt

Unknown Number: Oh shit yeah, sorry. I don’t know who this asshole of an ex is but I sure as hell am not him

Unknown Number: Dude sounds like a complete waste of human space

Unknown Number: And I think I wouldn’t get to live it down if my friends would hear I did something that shitty

Unknown Number: Wait lemme ask Sam

Unknown Number: Nah, he says Steve would’ve beaten my ass if I were to do that so there u go

Unknown Number: m sorry who tf are u

Unknown Number: Bucky

Unknown Number: what kind of stupid name is bucky

Unknown Number: Shit man, u’re the one blowing up my phone at 3 in the morning, sending me weird ass messages when I don’t even know u and u dare say my name is stupid???

Unknown Number: Sheit srry

Unknown Number: Is been A long night

Unknown Number: nd week

Unknown Number: Actlly make thAt the whle entire fuckin month

Girl with asshole ex: Srry fr bothering u

Unknown Number: It‘s cool

Girl with asshole ex: Hey the witches ask if ure hot

Bonky: Yeah

Girl with asshole ex: WHAT THE FCK MAN AT LEST BE A LIL BIT HUMBLE SMH

Bonky: U wanted me to lie?

Girl with asshole ex: Fair point

Girl with asshole ex: They wnt a pic

Girl with asshole ex: Pic or it didn’t happen punk

Girl with asshole ex: Tht was nat

Bonky: What kind of party are u at that you can constantly text me?

Girl with asshole ex: Wanda’s place

Girl with asshole ex: Girls night

Girl with asshole ex: Getting hammered on wine BITCH

Girl with asshole ex: Also dnt change the subject

Bonky: I don’t even know your name

Girl with asshole ex: Why would I tell u my name I just want to see a suppsdly hot asssd

Bonky: You know mine and now you want me to send u a pic of me

Bonky: Bit of a disadvantage here babe

Girl with asshole ex: Babe?

Girl with asshole ex: BABE?

Girl with asshole ex: Fine

Girl with asshole ex: BABE if I tell u my name will u send a pic of u so we kno u arnt a 60yr old perv

Bonky: I’ll think about it

Girl with asshole ex: Hey fuck u

Girl with asshole ex: Not fair

Bonky: How do I know you’re not the 60yr old perv?

Girl with asshole ex: Cuz she got big tiddies to prove

Girl with asshole ex: And that was wanda

Girl with asshole ex: So now u know my fridsn

Bonky: Still don’t know your name tho babe

Bonky: Also tell Wanda she shouldn’t give out this type of info to strangers

Girl with asshole ex: ure not a stranger anymore bonky

Girl with asshole ex: ure my babe nao

Bonky: I’m going to let that Bonky slide just bc u’re cute

Bonky: But I’m also going to stop replying until you tell me your name

Girl with asshole ex: U think im cute?

Girl with asshole ex: 

Girl with asshole ex: I mean u havnt even seen me but thats fair

Girl with asshole ex: Wand and nat say its true so ill believe u rnt lying to me rn

Girl with asshole ex: But I wanna see if ure cute

Girl with asshole ex: Wait why r u up st 3 in the mrng I mean we re drunk but wht r u doing

Girl with asshole ex: Babe u need to take better care of urself

Girl with asshole ex: Babe

Girl with asshole ex: Babe?

Girl with asshole ex: BABE?

Girl with asshole ex: Ph shit ure actually ignoring me

Girl with asshole ex: I dont like this

Girl with asshole ex: I actually like talking to u

Girl with asshole ex: Pls stop ignoring me

Girl with asshole ex: COME BACK AND LOBE ME

Girl with asshole ex: Babe?

Girl with asshole ex: Fine

Girl with asshole ex: It’s Y/N

Bonky: Now, that wasn’t so hard was it? 

Babe: fcuk u

Bonky: I’m up at 3 bc we ordered pizza and decided it’s time to beat Sam’s ass in Mario Kart once and for all

Babe: Nd how’s that going for ya?

Bonky: Bitch has been beating us for the past 3 hours

Bonky: Thor is the only one getting at least close to him now so we’re about to give up

Babe: Wait shit how r u replying so fast if ure playing Mario kart tho

Bonky: I gave up two hours ago

Babe: Quitter

Bonky: Just gotta know which fights to pick babe

Babe: Heads up I might be fallin asleep soon

Bonky: Drink some water before that, maybe get some food in u as well to soak up all the alcohol and have an advil close for tomorrow

Babe: Ok MOM

Bonky: Hey Wanda willingly told me you have “big tiddies” so your friends don’t seem to be doing a good job of taking care of you

Bonky: Might as well let me do it so you don’t die tmrw

Babe: Ohhhh so u careeeee babe im touched

Babe: Kkkkkk Ill talk tu u tmrw ill be dead soon

Babe: Nd I do have big tiddies

Bonky: Good night babe

*

Babe: What the shit

Bonky: I see you survived

Babe: Barely

Babe: My head might explode soon and I feel like I’ve vomited for an entire lifetime

Babe: TMI sorry

Bonky: I’d like to point out I’m glad I don’t have to decipher your texts anymore and that you can actually spell properly

Babe: Fuck you Buckaroo

Bonky: I would also like to remind you that I have on good authority that you have “big tiddies” so don’t make me use that against you

Babe: I am going to kill Wanda

Babe:Ugh I need coffee

Babe: I’ll talk to you later

Bonky: I’ll be waiting for you babe

*

Babe: So

Babe: BABE

Bonky: Yes baby?

Babe: 

Bonky: Nah, you love it

Babe: Fine

Babe: You still haven’t sent a pic of you though. I might be able to rise Nat and Wanda from the dead if you do

Bonky: What do I get in return?

Babe: The promise that I will keep replying even though you might turn out to be an ugly orc?

Bonky: Not enough

Babe: Fine. I’ll keep talking to you until you want me to stop. Or until I get bored of you

Bonky: Eh, you can do better

Babe: What do you WANT?

Bonky: A pic of you in return

Babe: I’m not sending you nudes, perv

Bonky: If I wanted to see you naked and be a dick about it, I could’ve asked last night, don’t worry

Bonky: But if you’ll know how I look it’s only fair I should know how you look

Babe: That sounds reasonable

Bonky: I’d say it’s a fair exchange

Babe: Fine, you first then

Bonky: If you don’t send me a pic of you afterwards babe I will stop replying, just so you know

Bonky:

Babe: Did you type super hot guy with the most beautiful eyes in the world in Google or something?

Bonky: I’m touched but no. Sam took that photo at a work event

Babe: Bitch do you really expect me to believe this is you? That looks like a guy who just stepped out of a magazine, I highly doubt I would have the luck to text him instead of my ex when drunk

Bonky:

Bonky: Are you always this annoying?

Babe: …

Bonky: What? Do you want me to take a selfie with the fucking newspaper now? I read the news online babe, I’m not getting off of this couch just so I can buy a stupid newspaper to prove it’s me

Babe: Do you have one in a suit?

Bonky: …why am I putting up with this?

Bonky: Hold on

Bonky:

Bonky: It’s been 5 minutes, are you going to reply?

Bonky: You still have to send me a picture of you though, a deal is a deal you know

Bonky: Fine, I warned you

Babe: Shit sorry

Babe: Hi Bucky, this is Natasha

Bonky: Hi Natasha. Is Y/N alright?

Babe: Uhm how should I put this?

Babe: Y/N is crying right now and she can’t reply herself

Bonky: What? What happened? Is she okay?

Babe: Oh yeah

Babe: She’s just crying because (and I’m quoting here) you’re “so beautiful, it’s like all my wet dreams and fantasies have come together. I swear this is some cosmic joke, this is not happening”

Babe: I’m not sure if she’s laughing or crying now

Babe: But she keeps yelling at me that I have to send you the most perfect picture of herself that has ever existed or you will stop talking to her

Babe: I think she started crying again because “I will never live up to that level of perfection, he told me that I have to know which fights to pick”

Babe: Uh yeah so here

Babe: 1 Photo Attached

Bonky: Hey Nat, could you tell Y/N that I would like to talk to her now?

Babe: Sure

Babe: Hey

Bonky: Baby?

Babe: Yeah?

Bonky: You picked the wrong fight if you think “you will never live up to this level of perfection”

Babe: Oh God

Bonky: Stop being an idiot

Bonky: And listen to me

Bonky: I would really like to keep talking to you. Mainly because you’re an idiot who makes me laugh, but it’s also the fact that you are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen in my entire life

Babe:

[wolferals]

HURT

herman tømmeraas preference

*

*

-„get out of here! We dont want to see you anymore!“ you hostmom yelled in your face while you were pulling your suitcase through the hallway

-„OUT!“ she screamed and basically pushed you out of the house

-you stumbled backwards and your head hit the ground rather harshly

-it hurt

-your hand shot up to hold the wound on the back of your head

-your host mom didnt even care, she had slammed the door closed and left you there, bleeding

-and all that because of a misunderstanding

-your host sister (who‘s a dumbass bitch) had told her that you were constantly flirting with your host dad

-first of all gross, second of all you lived with them for taking care of a 5 year old girl

-why would you risk getting kicked out

-like now for instance

-after the realization hit you that you had a bleeding wound on your scull you sat up and looked around

-this neighborhood seemed lost, no one near to be seen

-of course there wasnt anyone around right in this exact moment of help needed

-so you slowly stood up, grabbed your suitcase and made your way to the house across the street to ask someone for help

-since you were bleeding, and not too light it took you some time to fully understand your situation

-but you eventually made it to the house and rang the doorbell

-literally a second later a dog shot around the corner and jumped up and down on your leg

-„hey.“ you greeted the fluffy little ball

-„Ellie!“ someone then shouted

-then this guy showed up

-tall, muscular, and damn handsome

-„hallo, hva gjør du her?“ he spoke and walked up to you to pull his dog away from your shaking body

-„sorry i dont speak norwegian. I fell.“ you explained and then showed him your hand covered in blood

-„oh fucking hell! Alright wait here, i‘ll get my keys to take you to the hospital.“

-without waiting for your response he ran inside, his dog right behind him

-it took him not even 30 seconds to come back out the front door you were standing in front of

-he had a towel in his hand

-„press this to the wound to make it stop bleeding“ he then told you and handed you the black towel

-„can you walk? Are you okay?“ he asked and grabbed your arm to help you around the house to his car

-once you were all settled he started the engine and drove you to the nearest hospital

-„what happened to you?“ he then asked and looked at you for a second

-„i was living with the Hansens. I was their au pair from (wherever you‘re from) but they kicked me out before because of some dumb misunderstanding.“ you told him

-„oh shit. So you got no place to go?“

-„i mean, i got this woman from the agency i traveled with who i could call, but she lives in Oslo, it might take her a while to get here or me to get to hers.“

-„thats fucking shit. What are you gonna do now?“ he asked seriously concerned

-„idk, first i need to get this fixed, i can worry about that later.“

-at the hospital they sewed my wound real quick while the guy, whose name i still dont know was waiting outside

-„it would be good for you to stay here overnight Ms y/l/n, just to make sure it heals the way it should.“ the doctor told you and handed you some disinfectant to clean your hands

-„okay.“ you just spoke and sat up straight

-„do you want us to get your boyfriend in here?“ she then asked making you smirk

-„he‘s not my boyfriend i dont even know him. He just helped me get here.“

-she nodded and then spoke:“Well be glad he did, you were bleeding heavily.“

-„anyway we‘re gonna get your room ready, just wait outside with your... friend.“

-you nodded and slowly walked out of the room

-„hey! Are you okay? Feeling better?“ the guy came up to you

-„yeah i am, thank you for driving me here ... whats your name actually?“ you sat down next to him

-„oh yeah right, I‘m Herman. What about you, stranger?“

-you laughed a little and then spoke:“My name‘s y/n. And thanks again.“

-„I have to stay overnight.“ you then added

-„Yeah i figured since it looked pretty bad.“

-you guys then sat there talking a bit until a nurse took you to your room

-Herman then gave you his number because he insisted on you calling him when he should pick you up the next day

-„you dont have to do this.“

-„no i actually do. You have no one here and im already involved here. I dont mind, really. Ill talk to my parents because I‘m staying with them in quarantine.“

-you thanked him again and then he left so you could get some rest

*next day*

-it was about 9am when you woke up in a strange location

-your head didnt hurt

-other than your back

-you were pretty sensitive when its about sleeping on other mattresses

-„oh good morning ms y/l/n. How are you feeling?“ the nurse came in right after you had sat up and grabbed your phone to check your texts

-you had told your family last night what happened and they just told you to either contact that agency woman or come home right away but you really liked norway

-and the only choice was to stay with Herman‘s family and maybe find a job?

-„I‘m okay. My head doesnt hurt anymore.“

-„Dizzy?“

-you shook your head at her

-„let me check your heart rate.“

-she then also checked on your temperature but it all seemed fine so she wanted to talk to the doctor about when you could leave the hospital

-you then got dressed from some clothes out of your suitcase, brushed your hair as good as you could with the big bandaid on the back of your head

-and obviously brushed your teeth

-when you were about to get back to bed you heard a knock at the door

-„come in.“

-„Hey how are you doing?“ Herman spoke smiling

-he had a small bouquet of flowers in his left hand

„I figured i needed to be a good person so i got you these.“ he said shyly

-„Thank you!“ you took them and looked at the flowers before putting them aside

-„i heard you‘re allowed to leave soon.“ he then said

-„oh really? Who told you?“

-he sat down on the end of your bed and answered:“I heard the nurses talking in the hallway

-„perfect. My back hurts terribly from last night. The mattress is shit.“

-„yeah i know, hospitals suck.“ he grinned

-„By the way, my mom would love to meet you.“

-„What why? She doesnt even know me.“ you laughed

-„I told her about your situation and she really doesnt mind having you stay with us.“ he smiled sweetly

-„you sure?“

-„of course.“

-you leaned forward to give him a hug as a thank you

-he smelled nice

-he had probably showered before he got there

-„thanks.“ you spoke again

-„stop thanking me. Of course.“ he softly stroked your back

-you then let go because you heard the door open

-„Good morning y/n, the results look good, your head seems fine so far. In my opinion there‘s nothing to worry about no. It wasnt quite a concussion so i think you can go home now.“ The doctor said and handed you some paperwork to sign

*

-out in the car Herman smiled at you

-„what?“ you looked away shyly

-„nothing. You‘re just different.“ he laughed

-„that‘s not a good thing.“

-„what? Of course it is. You‘re really interested as far as i can judge from the past 24 hours ive known you for.“

-„well...“ you were so shy you just looked out of the window hiding your face in your sleeve

-„cute.“ herman then murmured

-„ohh right.“ you joked and looked at him for a second

-„you are.“ he defended himself

-„sure.“ you grinned. „you have to know someone to judge.“

-he nodded and spoke:“i guess we‘ll get to know each other pretty damn good in the next time.“

-„pretty damn good.“ you repeated and got some tingles thinking about it

[toshisae]

call me baby

summary: in which chenle gives you the entire world in exchange for some love

genre: crack, fluff and another pinch of angst 

theme: ceo!chenle (sugardaddy au but without the sexy shit its just he buys you things in exchange for you loving him ok? ok) 

word count: 2.8k

author’s note: HIIIII ITS BEEN A LONG ASS TIME SINCE I WROTE SOMETHING SO HERES THIS also theres no sexy time unless the sexy time u want is going on an endless shopping spree then this fic is for u!! its just another crack idea i had lol and this is just to get rid of writers block or smth despite having this in my drafts for the longest time

–

you know how people say not to chat with random strangers from the internet?

because it’s terrifying and shit??

well you never listened 

here you are on a friday night on your phone

looking for some 40 year olds to troll

on this sugar daddy app you randomly found one day

not like you needed money or whatever

you lived with your brother jaemin who’s a doctor

so i guess you could say u’re: $$$$

and it’s just that you have nothing to do

what’t the worst that could happen right?

ding!

your phone vibrates in your hand

it looks like you’ve matched with your designated sugar daddy

“congratulations! you’ve matched with 6chittaphon9”

you looked at his profile and saw that he’s a 23 year old dancer

not up for it, you swiped left

“give me the good shit bro” - you tell the phone

you clicked the globe icon on the bottom of the screen

it switched you to a radar where it scans for possible sugardaddies who use the app

a little later your phone dings again

“congratulations! you’ve matched with zhong$”

and when you clicked on his profile,,

you let out a big big gasp 

he’s a 18 year old ..

looking for.. sugar babies??

if you were drinking something then you would’ve spat out that liquid real quick

you swiped to the right and sent this dude a message

“hi”

ok so chenle right

chenle is the youngest billionaire in the world

bye kylie jenner oof

after his father’s passing, his company, zhongs inc. was in his hands

his father’s last wish was to have chenle get married at a young age

but chenle obviously didn’t like that idea

he wanted to experience a normal teenage life where he parties, drinks, date some random girls or whatever a pesky teenager does

so he found himself downloading a sugarbaby app

also just for the lolz like c’mon this is chenle the king of clownery

the c in chenle means clownery wbk

he had the money, the looks, almost anything you need for a man

so he quickly made his account

and not a minute later he already matched with someone named ‘<y/n3’

he sees that this y/n person already sent him a message

so obviously he replies

“hello”

you: asl?

chenle: 17 / m / seoul; u?

you: same except im a female

chenle: well ain’t that obvious

on the outside you bursted out laughing

you: ok capt. crunch so would you like telling me your name or is it confidential

chenle: i mean, i guess its kinda confidential but the company wont know anyway but im zhong chenle 

you: ????? are u important or sumn

chenle couldn’t believe his eyes

chenle: um.. im ZHONG chenle

you: whats so special with your name

chenle was actually quite glad you dont know about his name or his background

chenle: nothing so wyd

it didn’t take awhile for you two to get along 

since you two had the same type of humor and age

you: why are you on this app tho if you are “young and rich”

chenle: i could ask you the same question

you: its friday my dude and im bored 

chenle: well,,,,,,,,,,, idk my friend recommended it to me

you: you’re friends with a bunch of old people?

chenle: nO I MEAN YES?? I MEAN NO 

you: ... are u fucking with me

chenle: no i’m not fucking with you, im talking to u :D 

in the end chenle asks you if it was okay that he’ll send you some money for fun

chenle: yk this app is about sugardaddies looking for sugarbabies right so lets make the most of it and give me your paypal or venmo and ill send you some cash for talking to me <3 

you: wtf chenle no its fine!!! i had lots of fun talking to you and this app is just a whole ass joke but im glad i met a new friend here but its okay dont send me some money !!!!!

chenle: nooo think of it like i’m treating you out for some dinner so please allow me 

you: still ! i wont let you,, till i get to see you so i know youre not some 40 year old i still think you are

chenle: how many times do i have to tell you im really 18 years old ffs but sure, when are you free?

on the inside youre just like: ASJDHJHDUIADHASJKDAHAHD WHAT THE FUCK

you: uhh i have school so i’m always busy hehehe

chenle: then i’ll see you in your school, what school do you go to?

this kid doesnt know when to give up

you: hhhhhhh i guess then i’m free tomorrow 

chenle: GREAT! I’LL SEE YOU ON HONGDAE here’s my number boo

and there you have it

your first unofficial meet up with zhong chenle himself

you were too much in thought about meeting him you didnt even notice jaemin standing there with pizza in his hands

“what are you staring at sis?” - jaems

“uh nothing” you snatched the pizza from his hands

fast forward to tomorrow

you were getting nervous to meet chenle

“hey where are you going?” jaemin takes a peek of you in your room

can he stop scaring you like that

“going out” - u 

“going where?” - jaems

“hongdae”

“cuteee do you have a date today?” he wiggles his eyebrows at you

“no-”

“are you going out with that pizza delivery boy?!” jaemin suddenly gushes

“jeno?” you ask him

“yeah that one” - jaemin

“no, i’m just gonna go shopping” you brush him off

jaemin shrugs and gives you some pocket money to spend

“be safe and have fun” he closes the door of your room

after safely arriving in hongdae, you sat somewhere thats not that crowded

who knows if this chenle person is famous right

so there you were waiting for him to text you or something

and just like that, your phone rings

it was an unknown number

but you answer anyway

“hello this is chenle, may i ask if you are in gongcha right now?” 

you looked around the people who’s passing by hoping to see someone fancy looking holding their phones

suddenly someone stops right in front of you

“found you” 

with that, chenle hangs up and sits across the table from you

“hi, i’m chenle” he gives his hand out for you to shake

and man, you were shookt

he looks like an ordinary teenager 

or a hypebeast for this occasion 

“o-oh .. h-hello” you bow

chenle suddenly laughs at your reaction 

his laugh is beautiful 

“don’t be nervous baby, i mean no harm” he smiles

his smile that totally made your heart melt

“how could i not? you’re the youngest billionaire out here” you gushed

chenle shushes you after the billionaire part

“sorry about that, it’s just i don’t like it when people tell me that” he tells you casually

ok humble king

“have you ordered yet? if not let’s order right now, on me” he grabs his wallet from his pocket and heads inside gongcha

after taking your orders, you two sat outside again with your drinks

“so y/n.. tell me about yourself” chenle takes a sip of his drink

“well, like i told you last night, i’m a student in college and i live with my brother who’s a doctor and that’s about it.. what about you, mr. zhong” you giggled

“first of all, don’t call me mr. zhong. you can call me lele instead and i love music and i like to play the piano and sometimes i sing” he shares, showing off his pearly whites

and after some many more conversations with him, he finally asks you an important question

“ok last question” he laughs, “i know it’s kinda weird but i really like your company and i know we met through a sugar daddy/sugar baby app but would you like.. stay with me..?” he asks cautiously

you stared at him with wide eyes

“i’ll pay for everything you want.. just,, stay or keep me company..?”

you kept quiet, just in shock on what just happened

“it’s okay if you don’t want to, just forget that i asked” he laughs awkwardly

“no it’s okay, i’ll keep you company but please please don’t pay for everything. i can pay for myself” you tell him

“why not? i got money, i can spoil you with gifts” he looks at you confused

“if you can’t remember, i’ve got a brother who’s a doctor and i guess we’re loaded too you know” you roll your eyes at him

“pfft okay then so.. where were we” 

and with that you guys carry on your conversation 

months has passed and you’ve been with chenle through everything

every time something happened in his company, you were there comforting him or just keeping him sane through out everything

and within those months, you’ve seen different sides of him as well

like the serious side of him– when he’s in business meeting and you’re his plus one 

aside from his secretary of course

the funny side of him– when he’s cracking jokes to literally everyone

sometimes he takes days off in the midst of his own company just to pull pranks on his secretary, renjun

and of course, his vulnerable side– when he feels he can’t do what his father left him, the family legacy

there were night where you had to stay over at his place just to make him calm down or just to make sure he’s sleeping or eating well 

and tonight was those vulnerable nights of chenle

here you were in his room, on the floor holding his hand as he rants about how his day turned to shit 

“it’s just so.. hard you know?” he opens up, “when everyone expects you to follow a certain life but i’m not all about that business shit life! i want to sing or fucking play the piano or do some teenager shit not this paper work life!” his voice cracks at the end of his sentence

“ah shit i’m crying in front of you again” he laughs, wiping the tears 

you don’t say anything but held his hand tighter

“thanks y/n.. you’re the best” he smiles down at you

“anything for you, chenle. that’s why i’m here for you right? to keep you company” you smile back

“can you.. come up here with me” chenle motions for you to sit beside him on the bed

you agree and climbed up

chenle sits up awkwardly, staring at you.

“woah this is the first time i had a girl on my bed” he giggles

“then i’m honoured” you laugh

suddenly your phone vibrates multiple times

you take a look and its your brother looking for you

“who is it?” chenle asks

“it’s my brother, he said i should go home” you slowly push yourself from his comfy bed

“no, it’s late. i’ll take you home first thing in the morning” 

“i don’t want to be a burden to you lele” you say shyly

“you’re never a burden to me y/n” chenle smiles again

that night, you slept in his very arms for the first time

you wake up earlier that him and decided to prepare breakfast for him

you set the eggs and bacon on the table with orange juice

you smiled at your efforts, hoping he’d like it

chenle woke up in distraught since you were no where in sight

he was in his pajama pants and he rushed downstairs to check if you were still there

and thankfully, you were

you were on the dining table, waiting for him with breakfast ready

“good morning” he grins, face looking brighter than ever

you smile back at him, “good morning to you too, sleepyhead. help yourself with some breakfast”

chenle takes a seat and sips on the orange juice next to him, “did you make this?” he asks

you nod, “for you” 

you could’ve swore you saw him blush for a moment there 

and with that, you two ate in peace, just enjoying each other’s company

a few days later

you couldn’t make it to chenle’s office since you had classes and it was exam week 

chenle was obviously very lonely that week

even his own secretary checked up on him cause he was awfully quiet ever since you came into his life

“so how are you and y/n huh” renjun casually asks chenle who was busy reading papers on the table

“we’re doing great” chenle replies nonchalantly 

“are you two going steady now?”

that question made chenle halt to a stop on what he was doing

renjun notices that chenle turned quiet

“i never asked her to be official” chenle gasps, scaring renjun in the process

“wha-”

“renjun hyung can you get me the biggest bouquet bundle you can find” chenle rushes

renjun nods and grabs his ipad, looking for what chenle requested

“fuck.. what did y/n wanted again” chenle asks himself, trying to remember the bag or things you told him about

“call jisung and tell him we’re going to the mall” chenle tells renjun yet again, rushing to the elevator so he could go to the mall with his best buddy

“so what are we buying your special someone again?” jisung asks chenle who was busy pacing around the mall

“y/n said she wanted a bag but i cant remember what was it” chenle tells jisung who just looks as lost as he was

chenle ended up going to every luxury store they had in the mall

like louis vitton, gucci, prada, balenciaga, fendi

you name it he went there and bought one bag each

he even went to some make up stores thanks to jisung’s suggestion

surprisingly he had a girlfriend who was a makeup artist and puts make up on jisung’s face when they have nothing to do

and of course, chenle followed what his best friend suggested

now they were on their way back to your place cause you just texted chenle that you were almost done with your exam

chenle and jisung unload his car and went straight up to your apartment that you shared with your brother

and your brother answers the door

“uh chenle? what are you doing here?” jaemin answers the door

chenle stood there in shock once again, “jaemin hyung? you’re y/n’s brother?” he stares at jaemin confused.

jaemin nods slowly before realization hits him, “you’re the person y/n is seeing?!” 

chenle nods uncertainly, slightly offended you never told jaemin about him but quickly shrugs it off. 

“well surprise! now can you help us with this? i’m asking y/n to be my girlfriend when she arrives home” 

jaemin immediately steps in and helps the two boys

after an hour or so, everything is now set into place

now they were just waiting for you to arrive

chenle stood there with his usual work attire which was a formal suit, holding a big ass bouquet and the paper bags right behind him

“jisung how do i look?!” chenle looks at jisung who was showing him two thumbs up

“dashing bro, she’ll say yes in no time”

and as if on cue, you walked in

and to say you were shocked to see chenle standing there 

“lele! what are you doing here?” you covered your mouth in shock as you saw the never ending line of paper bags right behind him and the bouquet he was holding

“i’m here to ask you to be mine” he replies, staring at you once again

“does my brother know you’re here?” you look around your living room and you spot jaemin in the kitchen, watching the entire thing go down

“yeah. why didn’t you tell me he was your brother” chenle pouts, but shakes his head as he hands you the bouquet

chenle clears his throat once again, “na y/n.. would you be my first and last girlfriend?” he closes his eyes tight, waiting for your response

“i would be honoured” you take the bouquet off his hands and jumped into his arms

“about time you asked her” jisung comments in the background

“baby look, i got you some gifts!” chenle puts you down and shows you the abundant amount of things he got you

you smacked him in the chest, “what did i say about you giving me expensive gifts!” 

“let me spoil you, please? you showed me how loving someone wholeheartedly is priceless, and i want to return the favor in my own way” chenle shows you his infamous puppy eyes.

“lele you’re making me cry!” you tear up, hidng your face in his neck

“also because i can’t remember the thing you told me you wanted a few days ago so i had to compromise” chenle giggles

you were happy

and he was happy

who knew an app could bring you two together and end up like this

the end!

[vaalinors]

you’re the anchor (that i tied to my brain)

Edward Elric to the last jedi 9 pm DON’T BE FUCKING LATE IM TALKIN TO U YAO: pray tell where the fuck is my brother

Edward Elric: it is 8 o fucking clock 

Edward Elric: im locked the fuck out of the house 

Edward Elric: and al STILL ISN’T BACK FROM HIS GODFUCK SHITHOLE DATE

Paninya: ed take a deep breath n hurl urself into a pond or smth

Paninya: als been freakin out about mei for at least 38478392 years now

Paninya: let him relieve his thirst

Paninya: AND BTW THIS IS UR OWN DAMN FAULT

Edward Elric: how in The FUCK???? is this MY FAULT??????

Paninya: u couldve had a perfectly gross dorm on campus bUT NO U HAD TO BE BOUJEE N RENT AN APARTMENT WITH UR BROTHER

Edward Elric: IM ONLY LOCKED OUT BC AL LOST HIS GODDAMN KEY AND I

Edward Elric: BEING THE SAINTLY BROTHER THAT I AM

Ling Yao: w0w thats a lie

Edward Elric: GAVE HIM MINE AND NOW I GOTTA SCREAM AT HIM TILL HE PUTS HIS TONGUE BACK IN HIS OWN MOUTH AND COMES THE FUCK BACK

Winry Rockbell: u reeaaallly dont gotta

Paninya: have u heard??? of this thing??????

Paninya: called????? pm?????????????

Paninya: bc its a thing u could use to bitch at al without annoyin the entire shit outta the rest of us

Ling Yao: lol lan fans at her grandpas rn and her phone cant be put on silent

Ling Yao: shes going to kick ur ass

Edward Elric: IM gonna kick ALS ass if he doesnt show up in the next half hour I DONT CARE IF HES ON A FUCKIN DATE

Ling Yao: may i remind u my sister is the girl ur brothers currently wooing

Ling Yao: u do that and lan fan wont be the only one kicking ur ass

Edward Elric: what think u can take me weakLing

Ling Yao: uh duh but i was talking about mei

Edward Elric: PLS shes what half a foot tall????? PLSSSSSSS

Lan Fan: so twice as tall as you

Edward Elric: DO,,,,,U WANT,,,,,,.,TO FUCKING DIE,,,,,,,.,.,,,,

Lan Fan: edward

Lan Fan: i am at my grandfathers house

Lan Fan: my phone is ringing so loud my neighbors think their doorbells r broken

Lan Fan: my grandfather is ready to smash it into oblivion

Lan Fan: if he does we WILL be reliving 3/10 and youll be tasting a lot more than just your stomach acid when im done with you

Lan Fan: do not make me sneak out of training to answer you again

Paninya: Rekt™

Ling Yao: mic drop

Edward Elric: psh whatever

Edward Elric: u fuckers think 3/10 scared me

Edward Elric: GUESS FUCKING AGAIN

Edward Elric: FUCKING C O M E  A T  M E

Paninya: o look shes typing

Edward Elric: anyway im gonna pm al goodnight and thank u

Winry Rockbell to is it gay to want to literally drink ushers voice: OI AL how was the date

Winry Rockbell: I WANT DETAILS

Edward Elric: if anyone wants to know how to be the Creepiest Fucking Person Ever

Edward Elric: talk to winry

Winry Rockbell: well seeing that i won best ed impression two years in a row now id say i do indeed know

Edward Elric: HAR DE HAR

Edward Elric: u think u fucking know me???

Alphonse Elric: Is it hard?

Paninya: yea all u rlly gotta do is yell fuck a lot

Alphonse Elric: Put ur hair in a braid with one obnoxious ass strand sticking right up

Winry Rockbell: dont forget u have to crouch down

Winry Rockbell: i recommend kneeling

Edward Elric: dont think i cant deck all u shitdicks

Ling Yao: ive just annoyed the info out of my sister

Ling Yao: it seems al is quite the casanova

Ling Yao: clearly not a family trait BUT

Edward Elric: i will piss in ur backpack

Ling Yao: case in point

Ling Yao: ANYWAYS UPDATE ON THE BET FRONT

Ling Yao: as im sure u all know ned, roy mustang and i have had an ongoing wager AKA who can wrangle the most freshies into joining his club

Ling Yao: well as of today the martial arts/dance troupe has 20 more members

Edward Elric: BULLSHIT

Ling Yao: and i believe that pulls me ahead of ned to tie evenly with mustang

Ling Yao: and really would any of u choose archery over martial arts??

Paninya: tbh i choose social life over any clubs but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Edward Elric: basic bitch

Paninya: u kno it

Paninya: but srsly wtf shifty how did u get 20 new members so fast

Lan Fan: he showed off and gave his number out to like half of them

Ling Yao: :O how could u EXPOSE ME LIKE THIS

Ling Yao: I tRuSTeD YOu

Lan Fan: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Edward Elric: just u fuckin wait ling

Edward Elric: ill leave both u asshats in the GROUND

Alphonse Elric: I mean first u have to

Alphonse Elric: Yknow

Alphonse Elric: Be taller than the ground

Edward Elric: I LIVE WITH U I CAN MAKE UR LIFE FUCKING MISERABLE U HEAR

Winry Rockbell to kyle ron WHOMST???: so about laser tag this weekend

Winry Rockbell: invite lings sister yay or nay

Lan Fan: why not

Rosé Thomas: It’d even us out

Rebecca Catalina: does it even matter tbh we all kno whichever team rizas on is gonna win

Riza Hawkeye: Catalina i resent that statement

Rebecca Catalina: pls point to me where thE LIE IS HAWKEYE

Winry Rockbell: ok then

Winry Rockbell added Mei Chang to the chat

Paninya: EY UVE JUST BECOME PART OF THE MESS THAT IS US SOPHS

Maria Ross: and a few seniors

Paninya: WE’RE BASICALLY A KPOP GROUP BUT BETTER (ʘ‿ʘ✿)

Lan Fan: ok we’re going laser tagging this weekend you in

Mei Chang: i feel like i may die if i say no so as long as my idiot brother isn’t going i’m in

Paninya to could u actually perhaps makin bacon pancakes: [DELETED MESSAGE]

Ling Yao: wot

Alphonse Elric: Whos going laser tagging

Winry Rockbell: pan ffs

Paninya: (◔◡◔✿)

Edward Elric: fuckin RUDE

Lan Fan to Panko: what is it

Panko: i have no idea what u mean my dear

Lan Fan: uve been typing for an hour now AND i can hear your teeth grinding from my room

Panko: i have no idea what u could be referring to my sweet

Panko: i just wanna kno how ur days been

Lan Fan: this is about ling isnt it

Panko: dear

Panko: u used an emoji

Panko: u never use emojis

Lan Fan: look i get that youre just looking out for me

Lan Fan: but its fine and so am i

Lan Fan: i really dont need a pity heart to heart

Lan Fan: besides hed give out his number to everyone in the world if he could thats just who he is

Panko: well ur not wrong

Panko: is it bad to say im so glad i rarely have to deal with bois

Lan Fan: girls can be idiots too

Panko: ppl in general usually r

Alphonse Elric to WE CANT KEEP DOWN ALL THAT VODKA ON KRAFT MAC N CHEESE: So i cant feel

Ling Yao: mY FACE WHEN IM WITH U

Alphonse Elric: That and the rest of my body

Alphonse Elric: How is one person so funny and sweet and amazing

Paninya: MY SON HES IN LOVE YALL

Paninya: ITS TRUE FUCKIN LOVE

Paninya: ELRIC 2.0 TEXT ME IF U NEED ANYTHIN

Paninya: CONDOMS

Winry Rockbell: oh god

Paninya: BIRTH CONTROL

Edward Elric: PAN WHAT THE FUCK U THINK AL KNOWS WHAT A CONDOM IS

Paninya: HE IS A HORNY TEENAGE BOI I BET U MY ENTIRE ASS HES USED ONE BEFORE

Lan Fan: PANINYA

Mei Chang: uh

Paninya: oh fuck

Ling Yao: mei so it was U that made that balloon fart noise just now

Lan Fan: ling kindly shut up

Edward Elric: SO AL ISNT BREATHING I THINK HES DEAD

Edward Elric: HES BEEN STARING AT HIS PHONE FOR 10 MINS NOW FUCK WHAT DO I DO

Paninya: CALL 911 U MORON

Lan Fan: where do you live i know CPR

Ling Yao: thats hot

Winry Rockbell: MEI PRETEND U CANT READ

Mei Chang: er i can’t read suddenly i don’t know

Ling Yao: (╯°□°)╯now she gives in to the memes

Edward Elric: ok nvm hes alive

Edward Elric: buT I M NOT GONNA BE FUC KBRB RUNNINGgh

Paninya: rip in peace

Alphonse Elric to how Extra™ do u gotta be to come up with fuccboi: So we’re still down for gta tomorrow right

Alphonse Elric: Ed cant make it because i killed him

Ling Yao: the old ed cant come to the phone right now

Ling Yao: why

Edward Elric: because hes going to cut off lings fucking elbows

Roy Mustang: can you even reach his fingers

Edward Elric: listeN HERE U liL SHIT

Alphonse Elric kicked Edward Elric from the chat

Ling Yao: thats cold

Ling Yao added Edward Elric to the chat

Roy Mustang: i knew it couldnt last

Edward Elric: if any of u polefucks ever want to know how to get ling to do something bother lan fan

Ling Yao: try it again and i will Key Your Face

Ling Yao: she has a physics test tomorrow

Alphonse Elric: Wow

Roy Mustang: :O

Jean Havoc: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Edward Elric: i got the beer for tmr night

Alphonse Elric: Damn right u do im not letting u in otherwise

Edward Elric: ignore asshurt over here hes pissed i embarrassed him in front of his date

Roy Mustang: at least he has one

Jean Havoc: yeah have u ever had a girlfriend edward??

Denny Brosh: Do you know what a woman is ned????

Edward Elric has left the chat

Ling Yao to Good Shit ✔💯: hey lan fan

Ling Yao: LAN FAAAAAN

Good Shit ✔💯: what

Ling Yao: guess who i just saw in chem doodling one miss rockbells name on his hw

Good Shit ✔💯: no

Ling Yao: oh yes

Ling Yao: i wanted to take a pic but ed decided to be a good student and tore it off before handing it in

Good Shit ✔💯: does he even try in chem

Ling Yao: no but at least he doesnt fall asleep like he does in lit

Good Shit ✔💯: hemingway puts everyone to sleep

Good Shit ✔💯: read some brontë or steinbeck

Good Shit ✔💯: id say dickens too but anti Semitism and all

Ling Yao: i love it when u talk lit to me

Ling Yao: reminds me of when u used to sneak into our library and read the biggest books u could find

Good Shit ✔💯: better than you climbing up the side of my house to sneak into my room

Ling Yao: pls u loved it

Good Shit ✔💯: debatable

Good Shit ✔💯: club meetings today dont forget

Ling Yao: how can i ur always here to remind me ;)

Winry Rockbell added Roy Mustang, Riza Hawkeye, Jean Havoc, Maria Ross, and Rebecca Catalina to ROSE TYLER DEFENSE SQUAD WHERE YALL AT

Winry Rockbell: just so we’re clear friday nights a byob sitch

Lan Fan: well wade was totally off

Ling Yao: atta girl

Paninya: wow and here i was thinkin byob meant bug ur own business

Edward Elric: what the utter fuck

Alphonse Elric: Dont act coy u LIVED a bugs life ed

Winry Rockbell: BRING YOUR OWN BOTTLE CAPICHE

Winry Rockbell: jesus now ive got the kim possible theme song stuck in my head

Edward Elric: if one of u picks yoshi i will e n d  u

Paninya: no promises n its not our fault yoshi pushed ur fool ass off mushroom gorge that one time

Rebecca Catalina: LMAOOO

Edward Elric: that demonic fucking dinosaur needs to go extinct

Roy Mustang: since brosh doesnt give a shit do we want to make this a floor thing

Ling Yao: i see what ur doing mercedes benz u sneak ass

Roy Mustang: you caught up yao i can finally start trying

Edward Elric: news flash fuckers i got 5 more ppl today u can both suck my ASS

Winry Rockbell: ok but keep it small

Lan Fan: ,,,,,,,

Maria Ross: this is why timing’s important kids

Ling Yao: how much smaller could his butt get

Roy Mustang: are we even be able to locate it

Rebecca Catalina: does ned even have a torso????

Edward Elric: I HOPE U ALL ROT IN HELL

Paninya changed the chat name to eds ass is bigfoot pass it on

Winry Rockbell to Mulan but Better: is it weird that i cant stop smiling at ed

Winry Rockbell: hes sleeping in the chair across from me

Mulan but Better: a bit

Winry Rockbell: yeah

Winry Rockbell: hes such a nerd

Mulan but Better: but hes your nerd

Roy Mustang changed the chat name to WHO TE HFUCKS IDEA WAS IT O MAKE THIS AFLOOR THING

Edward Elric changed the chat name to URS U FUCKING CURLY STRAW

Paninya to wubba lubba dub dub: all of u need to see this Spicy™ video of ed from last night

Winry Rockbell: pan its 9 fucking am

Winry Rockbell: who tf is up that cares

Paninya: o dont u worry winnie the pooh

Lan Fan: yep shes still drunk

Paninya: i think ed will when he stops groaning in the bathroom there

Paninya sent a video in the chat

Paninya: srsly im postin this on ig later

Winry Rockbell: SHIT thats loud

Alphonse Elric: What the fuck is that

Riza Hawkeye: Is

Riza Hawkeye: Is he singing mad world

Paninya: u bet ur blonde ass he is

Lan Fan: was this after we took turns playing yoshi and demolishing him in mario kart

Paninya: u bet ur toned ass it was

Winry Rockbell: paninya i can barely hear anything over u shouting STRIP STRIP STRIP in the bg

Ling Yao: edward really is tone deaf isnt he

Ling Yao: oh hes stopped puking

Ling Yao: hes looking at his phone

Alphonse Elric: Rip in peace our bloodshot eyes

Edward Elric: wHAT THE ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS IS THAT

Edward Elric: WHAT THE ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS

Edward Elric: WHAT THE ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS DID U ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS DO TO MY PHONE

Ling Yao: HAHAHAHA OH MY GOD

Roy Mustang: dear jesus what is happening

Paninya: oH MY WHICH ONE OF U DID THIS

Paninya: I WILL K I S S U

Mei Chang: there is way too much shouting this goddamn early in the morning

Ling Yao: while u were busy cackling over that video i may or may not have convinced lan fan to steal eds phone

Edward Elric: U ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS BETTER ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS FIX MY ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS PHONE OR IM ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS

Jean Havoc: hes like an infuriated duck with a lisp

Roy Mustang: siri what is the tiniest species of duck

Edward Elric: U WANNA ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS FIGHT

Paninya: pls tell me one of u hungover fucks is gettin this on video

Mei Chang: lan fan u okay?

Lan Fan: yeah too much shouting i have a headache

Lan Fan: add me back when ed calms down (◕ ‿ ◕✿)

Lan Fan has left the chat

Paninya: hey ed ill bet even yoshi can say fuck

Edward Elric: FOR ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS SAKE

Lan Fan to Guns n Roses: hey

Lan Fan: i dont know where you are rn

Lan Fan: im still sort of hungover and i kind of need someone to talk to who isnt going to get angry or

Lan Fan: try and rationalize everything and well

Lan Fan: do you ever just wish that things could change

Lan Fan: that you could be someone entirely different or that you could get out and leave and not give a damn about anything or anyone or

Lan Fan: because ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Guns n Roses: Okay i was at work but i’m coming back right now

Guns n Roses: And i’m going to get you tea and you’re going to tell me whatever you want to tell me okay??

Lan Fan: thanks

Paninya to ID SING OH CANADA TOO IF MY PM HAD AN ASS LIKE THAT: ok but for real

Paninya: dicks r like mushrooms

Paninya: little funny gross mushrooms

Rosé Thomas: Paninya you’re high go home

Paninya: oh sweet flower i wish i was

Winry Rockbell: its 4 fucking am GO TO SLEEP

Paninya: time is an illusion

Paninya to TRICKY tricky TRICKY tricky: i crave the sweet release of death

Edward Elric: FUCKING KARMA

Winry Rockbell: i could hear u playing music at 5 am again today why tf have u been up so late

Paninya: my roommate was screaming french at me

Paninya: she has a test today

Paninya: also

Paninya added Lan Fan to the chat

Paninya: LAN FANNNNNNNN

Lan Fan: i didnt do the psych hw paninya

Lan Fan: and run-dmc doesnt deserve this subpar treatment

Alphonse Elric: Lan fan

Alphonse Elric: Lings been looking for u

Lan Fan: i know its ok dont worry about it

Edward Elric: A FUCKING BIRD JUST SHAT ON MY HEAD

Paninya: what was that????? u said???????

Paninya: about karma?????????

Edward Elric: WHAT IS THIS LITERAL SHIT ON ED DAY

Lan Fan: is that not everyday

Edward Elric: I WILL FIGHT ALL U ASSDICKS

Lan Fan: 3/10 edward

Edward Elric: i will fight me for only i myself am the one assdick here thank u amen and goodbye

Lan Fan to Literal Monkey™: so i hear you were looking for me

Literal Monkey™: that depends

Literal Monkey™: what did i do lan fan

Literal Monkey™: did i say something

Literal Monkey™: tell me what i did that made you so upset at me

Literal Monkey™: if i did something im sorry i really am but you cant just disappear and not even tell me whats wrong

Lan Fan: i know

Lan Fan: it wasnt you i just

Lan Fan: my grandfathers relapse and its been rough with classes lately

Lan Fan: it kind of hit me that i cant always afford to be chill all the time

Lan Fan: sorry ive been mia

Literal Monkey™: well now i feel like a dick

Literal Monkey™: ur my best friend lan fan and i think ive gotten so used to u being near i freak out when ur not

Literal Monkey™: i guess it kind of says something about me that might not be a good thing

Literal Monkey™: especially since i climbed the side of ur house to see if u went back home and u werent there

Lan Fan: you w h a t

Ling Yao to Frying Pan: in hindsight

Ling Yao: i prob shouldnt have told her about the climbing

Ling Yao: shes not talking to me again

Frying Pan: u done fucked up boiii

Ling Yao: so will u tell me whats really wrong with her now

Frying Pan: not a chance boiii

Winry Rockbell to Wannabe Alchemist: hey i know its kind of sudden

Winry Rockbell: and u prob have other things to do

Wannabe Alchemist: nah im free shoot

Winry Rockbell: could u maybe come with me this weekend

Wannabe Alchemist: …are u sure

Wannabe Alchemist: i mean of course ill go hell even if i had a meeting with the goddamn president id skip it to go anywhere with u

Wannabe Alchemist: but i dont want to overstep my right or anything

Winry Rockbell: no ed u could never impose

Winry Rockbell: its just been kind of a shit year

Winry Rockbell: i dont know if i can handle going to visit them alone this time

Wannabe Alchemist: dont worry im there for u

Wannabe Alchemist: whatever u need

Winry Rockbell: i

Winry Rockbell: thanks ed

Wannabe Alchemist: theyd be proud of u win

Winry Rockbell: :)

Winry Rockbell: not to degrade ur sentiment or anything because damn ed u can be sweet

Winry Rockbell: but id do buttfuck anything besides meet with our president

Wannabe Alchemist: i read that as u would butt fuck anything but shit u right

Mei Chang to “3/10 WASNT EVEN THAT BAD” famous last words: paninya was that you outside my school trying to sell taylor swift tshirts

Lan Fan: paninya what the hell

Paninya: ok HS GIRLS EAT TSWIFT UP

Mei Chang: you looked stalkerish as hell my principal was going to call the police

Winry Rockbell: just burn them in a rusty can like the ratchet ho u are

Paninya: what is This Disrespect™ n pls im not gonna burn them that merch cost me lk 984759 bucks

Lan Fan: sounds fake but ok

Ling Yao: and why tf would u sell them taylor swift is finally getting interesting

Winry Rockbell: yeah shes finally being savage af isnt this what u signed up for

Paninya: hey i signed up for Drama Taylor

Paninya: this is just plain whoring for attention

Alphonse Elric: Not sure those terms are mutually exclusive

Edward Elric: HOLY FUCK

Lan Fan: speaking of whoring for attention

Edward Elric: I GOT MUSTANG TO PLAY LEAGUE

Edward Elric: went straight for brand the dumb fucking pyromaniac

Alphonse Elric: Can i just remind u that ur first time ur jerk ass went right for garen

Edward Elric: GAREN is a PERFECTLY FUCKING GOOD CHAMPION TO GO FOR WHEN UR A NOOB DUMBASS

Alphonse Elric: Sounds fake but ok

Ling Yao: and a bit like neds trying to compensate for something

Edward Elric: U ALL AINT SHIT

Lan Fan: its yaint

Ling Yao: u uncultured fuck

Paninya: k first of all lol is a game for 13 year old prepubescent boys

Lan Fan: so perfect for edward

Edward Elric: DONT FUCKING TRY U KNOW UR A HO FOR AKALI

Edward Elric: ,,,,,,,,dont say 3/10 u know i would rather fucking die

Lan Fan: then perish

Alphonse Elric: Ed did U make that whale noise

Winry Rockbell: the real question here is paninya???? can actually spell???????? words???????? whAT??????

Paninya: SECOND OF ALL any of u want tswift shirts hmu (◡‿◡✿)

Edward Elric: taylor swift is fucking great why the fuck would u sell them

Winry Rockbell: ………..

Alphonse Elric: ……………………

Paninya: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Lan Fan changed the chat name to ill take edward elric is fake Punk Rock™ for 800 alex

Edward Elric: OI U CAN BE PUNK ROCK AND STILL LISTEN TO GUILTY PLEASURE POP

Winry Rockbell: SOUNDS FAKE BUT OK

Rosé Thomas added Mei Chang, Alphonse Elric, Edward Elric, Roy Mustang, and Riza Hawkeye to Unnamed

Paninya changed the chat name to PROJECT LINGFAN

Paninya: ALRIGHT LISTEN UP

Alphonse Elric: What the hell is lingfan

Paninya: PLS WITHHOLD ALL QUESTIONS TILL THE END OF THE BRIEFING MY PRECIOUS CHILD

Winry Rockbell: she continues??? to spell????? correctly???????? what i am amazed?????????????

Paninya: ROCKBELL FULL OFFENSE STFU

Winry Rockbell: rude

Paninya: SO EVERYONE HERE KNOWS OUR GOOD FRIEND LING YAO AKA SHIFTY AKA MONKEY BOI AKA CO-PRES OF THE MARTIAL ARTS/DANCE TROUPE YEA

Mei Chang: if i say no can i leave

Paninya: AND EVERYONE ALSO KNOWS MY SPICY GIRL LIGHT OF MY LIFE LAN FAN AKA DEFINITION OF BADASS AKA EDS WORST NIGHTMARE AKA CO-PRES OF THE MARTIAL ARTS/DANCE TROUPE YEA

Edward Elric: she is not my worst fucking nightmare

Mei Chang: so you don’t turn into a stuttering baby every time she brings up 3/10

Edward Elric: U WERENT THERE U DONT FUCKING K N O W

Paninya: AND EVERYONE HERE KNOWS THAT THOSE 2 HAVE THE BIGGEST RAGING BONERS FOR EACH OTHER THAT ANYONES EVER FUCKIN SEEN YEA

Winry Rockbell: i feel like there was a better way of putting that

Edward Elric: wait hold THE FUCK UP ur fucking with me right

Roy Mustang: yes edward

Roy Mustang: she made an entire separate chat and invited all these people just so she could fuck with you

Alphonse Elric: Thats literally what the normal group chat is for wtf ned

Edward Elric: what the UTTER FUCK???? LING AND LAN FAN????????

Rosé Thomas: You were right winry he’s blind

Alphonse Elric: Dude how the hell are u so ignorant

Riza Hawkeye: Edward are you really unaware of this

Edward Elric: HOW DO U ALL KNOW ABOUT THIS WHAT THE FUCK

Roy Mustang: id ask if you saw them at the floor party but i remembered you were too busy practicing for your x factor audition

Paninya: OK ED SINCE UR CLEARLY THE OBLIVIOUSEST FUCKING PERSON ON THE FACE OF THE GODDAMN PLANET

Winry Rockbell: obliviousest

Winry Rockbell: i knew it wouldnt last

Paninya: LET ME JUST HIT U WITH SOME EXAMPLES

Paninya: LAN FAN NEVER BLUSHES UNLESS U MENTION LING TO HER AND THEYVE KNOWN EACH OTHER SINCE C H I L D H O O D

Paninya: WHEN LAN FAN SHATTERED HER ARM IN FRESHMAN YEAR LING CARRIED HER HALFWAY TO THE DAMN HOSPITAL AND SLEPT NEXT TO HER SICKBED FOR THE ENTIRE WEEK SHE WAS THERE

Roy Mustang: he threatened to and i quote ‘key your face’ if you bothered her again

Winry Rockbell: lan fan only shattered her arm that time because some dumbass thugs tried to jump ling in order to threaten his dad

Mei Chang: whenever lan fan doesnt answer him right away he gets all huffy and paces for hours and checks his phone like 500 times until she replies LIKE SHE ALWAYS DOES

Paninya: LITERALLY TODAY OK RIZA CAN CONFIRM IM WALKIN TO MEET LAN FAN FOR PSYCH AND I SEE HER PRACTICING A FUCKING KARATE MOVE OR SOME SHIT WITH LING ON THE QUAD

Paninya: SHE STARTS LAUGHING AND I SWEAR ON MY FANTASTIC ASS LING STARES AT HER FOR 10 WHOLE MINS

Paninya: SHES BENDING HIS LEG FARTHER THAN ANY LEG SHOULD BEND AND HES LOOKING AT HER LIKE SHES THE ONLY DAMN THING WORTH KNOWING IN THE ENTIRE FUCKIN UNIVERSE

Paninya: THIS HAS BEEN HAPPENIN FOR YEARS I CANT EVEN WITH THEIR UNNECESSARY ANGST ANYMORE

Paninya: THEY NEED TO GET THEIR SHIT TOGETHER BEFORE I ACTUALLY FUCKIN EXPLODE JFC (╯✿◕益◕)╯︵ ┻━┻

Riza Hawkeye: That is indeed what happened

Rosé Thomas: And that’s why we made this chat

Rosé Thomas: So all of you can experience our pain

Edward Elric: ,,,,,,

Alphonse Elric: Seriously wtf is a lingfan

Mei Chang to pacific rim uprising is the sequel we didnt know we wanted and always needed no one fight me on this: you all know my name is mei right

Paninya: first time im hearin it

Mei Chang: because my calc teacher doesnt

Winry Rockbell: oh god what does he call u

Mei Chang: literally ‘mee’

Edward Elric: RIP IN FUCKING PEACE

Paninya: wot in tarnation

Ling Yao: u mean wot in pronunciation

Mei Chang: mee-eye is okay and mYE sure but MEE

Paninya: dw a teacher called me panYEA once lk??? bless u????

Edward Elric: omfg PETITION TO CALL PANINYA PANYEAH FROM NOW ON

Lan Fan: panno

Winry Rockbell: a teacher called me wine-ry in fifth grade like how in the actual fuck could u mess win-ree up

Edward Elric: maybe bc u were indeed hella whiny

Winry Rockbell: at least she knew i was there u were too smol to see over the table

Alphonse Elric: Better loud than nonexistent

Edward Elric: GTFO AL I WAS FUCKING TALLER THAN U

Paninya: “was”

Mei Chang: in any case i’m done trying to correct him hello yes my name is mee

Ling Yao: and wen it nite

Paninya: wtf r u on ling yao n where can i get some

Winry Rockbell: its another fucking meme i stg lan fan pls control this boy

Lan Fan: the kalc teachre cannt saye it rhite

Ling Yao: vINdICatION

Edward Elric to PROJECT LINGFAN: fuck this they gotta be in love

Winry Rockbell to Mulan but Better: hey theyre selling stroop waffles outside the bio building

Winry Rockbell: i can grab some for u if ur in class

Winry Rockbell: wait is that u in line

Winry Rockbell: are u wearing a lab coat

Winry Rockbell: u ran out of class didnt u

Winry Rockbell: did u not even bother to take off ur goggles u look like a nerdy terminator

Winry Rockbell: how many are u buying holy shit ARE U STUFFING THEM IN UR LABORATORY COAT POCKETS

Winry Rockbell: DID U JUST N A R U T O  R U N OUT OF THE QUAD

Mulan but Better: why are you still asking me you know the answers yes

Roy Mustang to My Queen™: theyre selling stroop waffles right now

My Queen™: Has ling gotten there yet

Roy Mustang: theyre no longer selling stroop waffles right now

Rosé Thomas to 7 excellents and LAN FAN THE WAFFLE TRAITOR: It’s official

Rosé Thomas: Mustang won the bet

Winry Rockbell: wow i forgot that was still going on

Maria Ross: how’s ed taking it

Rosé Thomas: Oh how you would think he’d take it

Paninya: EYYYY EDS GONNA ATTRACT THE CAMPUS POPO AGAIN

Roy Mustang to PROJECT LINGFAN (WHAT IS A LINGFAN SOMEONE TELL ME ALREADY): if ling lost the bet he had to choose

Roy Mustang: either actually outright confess to lan fan or end whatever it is they have

Paninya: Y TF WOULD U GIVE HIM THE SECOND OPTION ALL THEY NEED TO DO IS STOP DANCIN AROUND EACH OTHER N BANG

Alphonse Elric: Paninya its more complicated than that

Paninya: WHAT IN THE 7TH RING OF HELL COULD BE SO COMPLICATED ABOUT THIS

Mei Chang: long story short

Mei Chang: our familys shit deep in politics

Mei Chang: either ling gets in there shit deep too or hes married off

Edward Elric: well fuck

Rosé Thomas: Lan fan knows

Rosé Thomas: When she messaged me after the party i found out that this is why she was so upset

Rosé Thomas: Apparently a drunk ling told her that she should leave him because ‘he’s scared about what would happen if he stopped caring and she deserves better than a coward’

Paninya: well now i feel like shit

Mei Chang: welcome to my world

Mei Chang to Secret Swiftie: remember how you came to my school and almost got arrested

Mei Chang: a couple of girls are asking about your tshirts

Secret Swiftie: call it what u want is a fuckin eargasm I TAKE IT ALL BACK ALL OF IT

Secret Swiftie: I HAVE HEARD AN ACTUAL REAL LIFE A N G E L

Mei Chang: great i’ll tell them you died

Lan Fan to WHOS FAKE PUNK ROCK NOW U FILTHY FUCKING HYPOCRITES P A N I N Y A: has anyone seen my book

Paninya: what book is it

Lan Fan: howard’s end

Alphonse Elric: Forsters great

Winry Rockbell: sorry i havent

Lan Fan: its fine i probably left it in the studio

Ling Yao: oi i was just kicked out of the dining hall what kind of DISRESPECT

Paninya: k but u were eatin all the soup

Ling Yao: is that a crime now

Winry Rockbell: u took the entire pot ling

Lan Fan: you didnt even try to be stealthy about it you just ran back to your seat giggling

Mei Chang: how are they just kicking you out now

Lan Fan: oh they have he climbs back in through the window

Edward Elric: last week u complained the rice wasnt cooked

Ling Yao: have u????? had the rice here??????? itS C R U N C H Y

Edward Elric: jfc lower ur standards ur highness this is college

Lan Fan: you dont pay 70K a year to eat

Paninya: just suck it up lk the rest of us

Winry Rockbell: its either this or starve yao

Ling Yao: :O

Ling Yao changed the chat name to fake friends™

Alphonse Elric to cAn yOU FEeL iT Now mR KRAbs: What the everloving fuck do i have to murder to find out what the shit lingfan is?????¿¿¿¿¿

Lan Fan: …..

Alphonse Elric: Ah

Alphonse Elric: Wrong chat

Paninya: (✿◉‿◉)

Winry Rockbell: AL FOR THE LOV EOF

Winry Rockbell kicked Lan Fan from the chat

Winry Rockbell kicked Ling Yao from the chat

Mei Chang: you know they can still see previous messages

Edward Elric: fuckkkkkk

Paninya: well first time not directin this at edward

Paninya: duuuuuude u fucked up

Panko to Lan Fan: hey i saved u a seat in psych but u didnt look over

Panko: is this about kickin u out of the squad chat

Lan Fan: do they all know

Panko: uh kno what

Lan Fan: does everyone know paninya

Panko: if i answer will u promise not to disappear again

Panko: no one told anyone else about it if thats what ur angry about we all figured it out by ourselves

Panko: well except for ed but that boi is dumb af

Panko: n im not sayin u guys were obvious or anything it took a while until we saw it

Lan Fan: i think im going to go back to my grandfathers for the weekend

Panko: pls dont drop off the face of the earth again

Lan Fan: i wont i was going to go back anyway and space is good

Panko: ur not the only one in this lan fan

Panko: no matter how much u wont see it

Lan Fan: (◠‿◠✿)

Winry Rockbell to PROJECT LINGFAN (ALPHONSE ELRIC DONE FUCKED UP YALL): so lan fans gone

Winry Rockbell: when did u say ling had to make a choice mustang

Roy Mustang: i didnt??

Edward Elric: u said he had to make a decision and DIDNT GIVE HIM A SHITDAMN DEADLINE

Edward Elric: ITS NEVER GONNA HAPPEN NOW HONDA

Paninya: well thats just great chevrolet

Riza Hawkeye: You really didnt think this through bmw

Roy Mustang: wow at least i didnt blow our cover

Alphonse Elric: Dont throw me under the bus with u toyota at least im repentant

Paninya: alright well now that lamborgini royally fucked up

Winry Rockbell: “lamborgini”

Winry Rockbell: so close

Edward Elric: so what the fuck is gonna happen now

Winry Rockbell: ok mei can talk to ling bc she lives with him

Mei Chang: unfortunately

Rosé Thomas: I don’t know if lan fan will be willing to talk

Rosé Thomas: She used an emoji again

Mei Chang: actually i’ll talk to her someone else tackle my brother

Paninya: idk how to speak fuccboi language one of the guys gotta do it

Winry Rockbell: after roy and als fuckups who else can we choose

Edward Elric: RUDE

Roy Mustang: sit down you didnt even know they were a thing

Edward Elric: MAYBE BC I DONT POKE MY FUCKING NOSE INTO OTHER PPLS BUSINESS

Alphonse Elric: Well ofc u physically cant ned

Winry Rockbell: can u even see other ppl without platform shoes

Mei Chang: or a ladder

Edward Elric: UR FUCKING SHORTER THAN ME JFC

Paninya to milk: hate it, shouting: always, music taste: shite = I AM FORCIBLY SHUT INTO THE BODY OF A SIX YEAR OLD: RIZA TOLD ME THERE IS A PETTING ZOO 3 MILES AWAY YALL MEET AT MY CAR IN 5

Edward Elric: we’re already fucking here

Ling Yao: lol weve been here for an hour

Alphonse Elric: Mustangs been holding a komodo dragon for approx half that time

Mei Chang: winry drove us and there are llamas

Winry Rockbell: i am surrounded by puppies rn am i dead

Paninya: bitch u r to me im writin u all out of my will CLEARLY ALL MY M8S ARE SHIT

Ling Yao to Sister Mine: mei

Ling Yao: meiiiiiii

Sister Mine: i’m literally right next to you what

Ling Yao: have u ever seen lan fan with her hair down

Sister Mine: once during the floor party you all snuck me into

Sister Mine: why do you ask

Ling Yao: her hair tie broke a few days ago and she was fussing with it and i couldnt breathe

Sister Mine: when her hair is down??

Ling Yao: up, down, soaking, gone

Ling Yao: she takes my breath away, mei

Ling Yao: she takes my breath away no matter what she does, or say, or looks like and i am a coward

Sister Mine: you may be right

Ling Yao: are you ashamed of me?

Sister Mine: that depends

Sister Mine: what do you plan to do about it

Lan Fan to Literal Monkey™: hey i know its 5 am and youre probably not even awake and this is probably useless anyway considering ive been transparent as all hell

Lan Fan: but i dont think sleep is an option until i tell you

Lan Fan: youre ridiculous

Lan Fan: youre ridiculous and full of it and infuriating and reckless and beautiful and just so so idiotic

Lan Fan: id have to be too i guess

Lan Fan: to be in love with you even after all of it

Lan Fan: and i really am just that

Lan Fan: idiotic and in love with you

Literal Monkey™: thanks

Lan Fan: did you just breakfast at tiffanys me

Literal Monkey™: yes because you would understand it

Literal Monkey™: you understand lan fan

Literal Monkey™: every shitty meme or reference or word i say you’ll always always understand

Literal Monkey™: just like how you understand that im all those things you said i was

Literal Monkey™: im reckless and infuriating and indecisive and greedy and far too ridiculous to deserve you and you understand that

Literal Monkey™: and if youre idiotic for being in love with me then im a hundred times more and you understand why too

Lan Fan: i think you have too much faith in me

Literal Monkey™: i think you have too little

Literal Monkey™: come to your window

Lan Fan: what why

Literal Monkey™: because its hard to type when im barely holding onto your window frame and looking like a hero straight out of an austen novel and honestly id rather told you how much im in love with you in person

Literal Monkey™: convention and all that

Lan Fan: well alright then

Paninya changed the chat name to IT FINALLY FUCKING HAPPENED LADS LINGFAN IS REAL FUCKING CHRIST NO MORE ANGST I AM LIBERATEDDDD

Alphonse Elric: Great so can someone pls explain wtf a lingfan is now

Edward Elric: Read at 8:09 AM

FULL VERSION AND CONTINUATION HERE

[exoparkchanyeogiwa]

Coughs and Sniffles (Oneshot)

(Pic is not mine)

'At least you were at home, in the arms of the one person in the world who made your life complete...'

The sun is shining, the birds are singing and you wake up with a smile on your face. However, your smile quickly fades when you see a shivering, sniffling, coughing Jongdae, trying to sleep comfortably beside you...

---------

Oneshot

_____

Genre: Fluff

Member: Jongdae (Chen)

_____

The room was enveloped in complete darkness except for the trail of sunshine that peeked through the left side of the curtains.

You rubbed your eyes and sat up in bed. You kept your eyes closed for a brief second in order to focus on the sound of the car tyres shuffling across the road outside and the faint melody of birdsong that was playing just beyond your bedroom window.

Today was going to be perfect.

Both you and your beloved Jongdae had a day off work and were both planning on going out to see a movie and then have dinner at a restaurant in order to celebrate your upcoming birthday.

Excitement coursed through your veins as you opened your eyes, leaped out of bed and pulled the curtains apart. The glowing sun caused warmth to spread throughout the entire room as you stood in front of the window and took a deep breath.

You turned to face the bed where you were met with Jongdae's sleeping figure. You stared lovingly at his handsome features and smiled contently. Suddenly, Jongdae  let out a gruff cough. This sudden disturbance to the silence caused you to jump slightly and you placed your hand above your heart until its beating slowed.

You placed your palm on Jongdae's forehead and concern overtook you - he had a fever and a very high one as it seemed...

He was pale and sweaty. His breathing seemed irregular and his eyebrows were knitted together making him look like he was struggling and pained.

You moved his dampened hair out of his face and proceeded to the bathroom to grab some medicine and a soaked wash cloth. You made your way back to the bedroom and placed the cloth onto his forehead. You wiped the beads of sweat from his brow and then headed to the kitchen to grab a tall glass of water.

"Dae," you whispered "Dae, it's me. Wake up and drink this."

He shifted in his sleep and turned to you with a tired expression.

"Morning, beautiful. What's that?"

"It's medicine Dae," you replied "Now drink up. It'll help you feel better."

"Medicine? What? I don't need medicine. Why would I need medicine?" he said.

A series of coughs and splutters followed this statement and you looked at him and mumbled:

"That's why..."

Jongdae decided to quit being stubborn and complied to your request.

Once he had swallowed the medicine, he attempted to stand up - only to be pushed back down onto the bed by you, who was not going to allow it...

"Kim Jongdae I will not let you get out of bed in this condition!" You stated.

"But what about our dateeee?" He whined.

"Forget the date, Dae. Look at you! You can barely walk three steps without going into a coughing fit!"

"Thats not tr--" - he barely even finished his sentence before he was inturrupted by yet another series of coughs and sneezes.

You gave him the 'I told you so' look and he whined in defeat.

"Ughhh how are we gonna celebrate your birthday nowwww?"

"Just stay in bed, baby. It's okay! Don't worry about the date and don't worry about me! Your health is my number one priority right now and I highly doubt that either of us would enjoy a date if it mainly consisted of endless bouts of coughing and sneezing... and I doubt that the people around us would enjoy that either." You reasoned.

Jongdae sighed and said:

"Okay. Fine. But I don't want you to have to look after me all day. Go out! Buy yourself a million chicken nuggets or more, baby - you deserve it. Leave me here and enjoy your day off! I'll be fine here."

You looked at him with a confused expression.

"Okay I'm sorry but that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard you say and you've said some pretty stupid things before, Dae."

He scrunched his face in confusion.

"Do you seriously think that I would enjoy my day off if you aren't there to enjoy it with me?"

He looked down and shook his head.

"Exactly!" You said, "Now lie down. Let me take care of you."

"No." He argued.

"Kim Jongdae, now is not the time to be stubborn. You're sick! You need to rest!" you said.

"Can we go downstairs instead? Please? Lets watch a movie together. It's too stuffy in here."

You were about to refuse his suggestion until he pouted and showed you his dreaded puppy-dog eyes. You winced and nodded your head in agreement which caused him to weakly raise both his arms with excitement.

You walked, hand-in-hand, into the living room and you told him to make himself comfy on the sofa while you went to grab something from the kitchen.

Minutes later, you returned with a glass of water and a bowl of chicken noodle soup in your grasp.

You laid the bowl and the glass of water down on the coffee table and grabbed a blanket from a nearby pile. You placed the blanket over his legs and turned on the TV.

Commercials were being played so you used this as an opportunity to feed the sniffling Jongdae some chicken noodle soup.

He happily ate every spoonful and left the bowl nearly squeaky clean by the end of it. He licked his lips clean and said:

"I feel so much better now! Thank you so much baby. I love you! And did I mention that you make THE.BEST.CHICKEN.NOODLE.SOUP. E V E R?"

You smiled and said:

"Aweh thank you, Dae. I love you too!"

You pecked his lips and looked deep into his dark, brown eyes once you pulled away -not even caring if you would get ill as a result of it.

"You still wanna go out on that date babe?" He asked, "C'mon we still have time to celebrate your birthday today!"

You shook your head, "Dae, my birthday is in three days... we have tonnes of time to celebrate! And who's to say that this isn't a good enough celebration huh? I'd even say that cuddling on the couch with you whilst watching my favorite TV shows is the absolute perfect way to celebrate my birthday."

Jongdae grinned, wrapped his arm around you and kissed your temple. You burrowed into his embrace and inhaled his cologne - your favorite scent in the entire world.

The commercials on the TV finished playing and an old re-run of Glee started to air. You both watched intently as you waited for your favorite part of the show to begin - the singing!

The characters began to sing your favorite songs. You and Jongdae just couldn't help but sing along with them. You both sang together with your voices filling the entire room, causing an atmosphere of happiness and delight to flow through the air.

"You sing the female part and I sing the male part of the song okay, baby?" He said, smiling.

"Got it!" You beamed.

You sang and sang and sang, your smile never leaving your face and with your laughter errupting between every other line of the song.

Then, when Jongdae's part came, you ceased your laughter and just smiled - you smiled because you were lucky enough to love the beautiful human being that is Kim Jongdae and you smiled because you were lucky enough to have him love you just as much.

The day didn't quite go as planned. But that was okay because you were there with him. You were there, listening to him sing his heart out. And eventhough he sounded a little croaky and gruff because of his fever, you still thought that he sounded like an angel sent to you from heaven... and in a way, he was.

The occasional cough and sneeze still escaped past his lips but spending the whole day with you in his arms had really helped him regain his strength.

The final TV programme ended and Jongdae clicked the 'off' button on the remote. The screen turned to black. Jongdae checked the time on his phone. It was 9pm.

"Hey, love, lets go to bed now. I know you must be tired" he said.

The only response he got from you was a soft snore and an unconscious whimper.

He smiled and kissed your head before he proceeded to carry you up to your bedroom.

He laid you onto the bed and covered you with the duvet to ensure that his beautiful girlfriend would be kept safe and warm.

Tomorrow. He thought. Tomorrow we're gonna go to the Cinema and watch that movie and go to dinner together just like we planned.

With that, he made his way onto the bed, wrapped his arms around you and drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

The next morning, the sun was shining brightly once again. Jongdae woke up, stretched his arms out and let out a mighty yawn. He stood up and made his way to open the curtains.

Sunlight filled the room once again as Jongdae made his way over to your sleeping figure.

"Love, loooove, wake up! Let's have a shower and eat before we head to the cinema."

You groaned and turned to face him.

"Oh my gosh you look horrible." He stated, bluntly.

"Gee thanks, Dae. I love you too." you scoffed.

Jongdae put his hand on your forehead and guilt consumed him upon feeling your high temperature.

"I guess we won't be going to the Cinema afterall..." he said.

"Do you mean to say that we get to spend another day cuddling on the sofa?" You asked.

Uh.. yeah. Is that okay? I'm sorry baby. I told you that you should've just left me home alone..." He said.

"SHH!" You said, putting your index finger up to his mouth in an attempt to shut him up.

"It's completely fine, Dae. Besides, now you get to look after me." You said, smiling brightly despite the pounding in your head.

But you took no notice of your aching bones, pounding headache or scratchy throat because you knew that a certain sweetheart named Kim Jongdae would be there, by your side, to help make you feel a hundred percent better again.

So what if you weren't out, celebrating your birthday in a fancy restaurant or watching the latest Avengers movie? At least you were at home, in the arms of the one person in the world that made your life complete.

In all honesty, you had hoped that everything would turn out that way...

~~~~~~~~~

I wrote this so quickly so pleaseee excuse any typos... I have really fat thumbs...

Anyways, I hope you guys like this one! Please tell me what you think cuz that would mean a lot! ♡

-Z

[saltynemo]

Snuck Out

WHATADO Everybody its your boi Nemo back at it again with another fanfiction. I had an amazing sex dream about the one and only, Tyler Joseph, and I decided to make a fanfiction about it, since I haven't wrote about Tyler in a long time. Plus, I got a request to do an ‘Anything Tyler’, so its a win win.

Summery: Tyler convinces Y/n to sneak into a club together and then Tyler gets jealous/angry at her for her acts. Y/n needs to be reminded who she belongs to

Type: Smut

Warnings: Cursing, Rough sexual content, alcohol reference, under age drinking, clubbing (going to a club), little daddy/dollface/doll kink, slight choking, over stimulation, getting caught, very little degradation ,Idk idk

Requested?: Yee

Word Count: 6.5k (6,536 words)

So without further a do, P-P-P-P-PLAY IT:

Ever since I introduced my mother to Tyler Joseph, she has insisted on me stop hanging out with him. "He is a bad influence" She states. To be honest, I have learned a lot of ways to make a fake ID with him, so I can see her point of view. Hes a bad boy and I dig that. Plus, just because my mom tells me not to chill with him, doesnt mean im going to listen to her.

Since I cant have Tyler around when my moms at home with me, me and him have our special little dates together. We usually sneak out together at 12 am, and go have fun. The worst action we have done together is sneak into a club thats about a block away from my house. And thats just what were going to do right now...

I take a swig from a Red Bull by my side, feeling the caffeine rush through my body. I sense a buzz next to me and I nearly jump out of my bed from excitement. Tonight is, once again, me and Tyler's night out together. I check my notifications and see he just texted me:

Tyler :P- Hey Y/n/n! Im across the street from your house Y/n- Are you crazy?! My mom is..asleep. Anyway, what are you doing out there? I usually walk to your house. Tyler :P- I thought a change of plan would be nice ;) Maybe we can sneak into the club again, like we did a while ago. Y/n- Hunny, last time we did that, they nearly called the cops. Are you sure you wanna take that risk again? What if they ask for an ID? Tyler :P- Trust me, they wont. This town is fuckin stupid. Come on, we'll have fun :) Y/n- I dont know about this..I mean im all up for danger, but this is kind of risky. Tyler :P- Oh come on..for me? :( Y/n- Oh okay! Fine. Ill be out in a minute

I get up from my bed and check my window, moving the blinds aside. And sure enough, I see Tyler; sitting down on the curb with his phone. I giggle and stroll to my walk-in-closet, looking for some clothing that could look like im in my 20's-which im not.

I picked out a red Thrasher sweater that cut off to my belly button, along with some jean short shorts. I slipped them on and check myself out in the mirror, noticing something was missing. I looked closer to my face, relizing if I was going to be in a club, I would need some slutty make-up.

I slipped into the bathroom, slowly closing the door so it wouldnt creak. I open my make-up kit, thinking of something that could look nice, but not too slutty. Would some red lipstick and smokey eyeshadow count? I shrug, grabbing the cosmetics needed. I apply the Ruby Luiquid to my lips, immitating a kiss to see if the magic worked. Of course, it did. I giggle, setting down my lipstick and focusing on my eyes. I dont think my eyeshadow is needed..I look pretty damn cute.

I sneak out of the bathroom, peaking behind my mother's cracked bedroom door. I large snore is erupting from the corner of the room. I roll my eyes, bouncing back to my room. I grab my phone and slip it into my back pocket.

I look in my mirror, checking myself out before I go. My height looks horribly small..I think they could spot that im not at least 21 years old quickly. Fuck it, Im definitely not wearing heels tonight. I slip on my usual red socks and black vans and grabbed some cash. I paused for a little bit, noticing my mother's purse was in my room. I look back at my door way, glancing to see if the ogre has awaken. I quicky, but quietly, grab my mom's wallet, searching for her card. Yes! Its here! Hasnt my mother learned yet? I slip it into my jean pocket and place the wallet back into the purse.

I sneak down the hallway, hoping that the hard wooden floor wouldnt creak at a sudden movement. I slowly open the front door, looking outside. I see Tyler, hoodie up and still on his phone. I slip out and close the door, locking it behind me. I jog to him, smiling at how cute he looked. He picked up his head and smiled, "Oh, Hey! Took you long enough" I chuckled, stopping right in front of him. He paused, scanning my face. "Whats with the make-up?" He asks, moving hair out of my features. I roll my eyes, "Were going to a club, Ty. There will be a ton load of sluts there" I inform, giggling. "Gotta blend in" I add, jazzing my hands up. We both share a  laugh and start to move down the street.

"Oh and by the way, I brought my mom's card" I say, pulling it out of my pocket and showing it to him. His eyes widened, but flashed a small smile, "You know the pin number..?" He asks, grabbing it from me and scanning it. I smirk, "And her signature" I add, taking it back from him and stuffing the rectangle back into my pocket. "I've taught you see well" He chuckles, putting me into a choke hold and ruffling my hair. I grip his forearm with both hands, giggling as I try to make him release me. We both laugh, him finally letting me go.

We went back to walking, a little too quiet for my liking. "So, did you bring any cash?" I ask, trying to kick the silence away. "I brought $40 of my mom's money" He says, feeling his back pocket to make sure its still there. "Our moms havent learned to hide their money" I say, looking over to him. He smiles, his dimples engraving in his skin.

*TIME SKIP Brought to you by Patrick's Fedora*

We turn a corner, the red Club lights blurry in our vision. We stop for a minute, eyeing out our location. "So, how do I look?" I ask, turning my body so its facing Tyler. "Do I look at least 21 years old?" Tyler just stares at me, scanning up and down my torso and legs. "Um- *cough* yea, deffinetly. You look amazing" He says, looking back up to my eyes. I smile, blushing like crazy, "You look older than 18-let me just say that" I giggle, playfully poking his chest. He rolls his eyes, "Come on, lets do this." We start walking towards the entrance, holding hands to make our disguise look believable.

Once we reached the line, we eyeballed the Security Guard; crossed arms and black T-Shirt that was obviously too tight. I looked at Tyler, giving him a worried expression. "Hey, they wont say anything" He whispers to me. "We have done this before, Y/n" I roll my eyes, smiling.

We stepped in front of the guard, looking up to the 6 foot tall man. He glared at us, squinting his eyes and looking at us closley. "You have an ID?" He asks, his voice rusty and cracked. I gulped, pretending to search my pockets for it. "Hey! Is that guy ok?!" Tyler suddenly shouted, pointing to a man laying on the ground; beer bottle in one hand and drooling. Must have past out. The Guard imediatly rushed over to him, yelling 'Hey, sir! Are you alright!?'. Tyler grabbed my hand, quickly walking into the club. Men and Woman were shouting 'Those kids went inside!' or just plain pointing to us. Tyler's grip on my hand tightened as we were greeted with blaring music, red and white flashing lights, and drunk sweaty men & woman.

He looked back at me, smirking as we started to blend in with the dancing crowd. He turned around and held both of my hands, leading me to the middle. I laughed, him letting me go. We started dancing, trying to fit with the crowd around us.

The lights and crowd around us were a blurr. Tyler and I were only focused on eachother, and also the ground to make sure we dont trip on eachother's feet. A couple of times, we had to move to a new location cause the Guard was looking for us. I guess thats what you get for sneaking into a club.

Suddenly, Tyler grabbed my hand, dragging me out of the dancing people. I quirked my eyebrow. Whats his plan this time? Get me drunk? He led me to the bar, finally letting go of my hand and looking at me. "Ok, whats your plan?" I ask, smiling since I was so confused. He smirks, at me, turning around and talking to the bar tender. I couldnt hear what he was saying, due to the noise in the club, but I knew it was evil. I heard him say the word 'hardest', and I knew right then and there what he was looking for.

Tyler payed the bar tender and turned around with a glass in his hand. I stared at the bubbling luiquid for a while, contemplating on what it was. I guess I was right..he is gonna get me drunk. "Hey Y/n" He said, waving the drink around slowly to snap me out of my daze. I give him a sarcastic look, "I dont wanna get drunk tonight" Tyler rolls his eyes, not wanting that answer. Suddenly, he grabs my waist, pulling me close to him. I lay my head back, giggling, "Joseph, what has gotten into y-". He puts the drink to my lips, making me open them and take in the alcohol. It tasted sweet, strong, sour, pretty much all of the flavors I could think of, I was tasting.

He sat me back up and took the drink away from my lips. "Tyler, what was that?" I ask, whiping them. He giggles, "Oh, it was nothing. Just the strongest drink they had on the menu" He put the glass down on the bar table. I raise my eyebrows at him, "Joseph, Im a light-weight. That drinks' gonna get me hammered" I say, lightly pushing him. "Thats the point" He chuckles, adding a wink. Damnit, why did I agree to go to a club with him? I already felt the alcohol rush through my veins, brushing up againts every cell. "Come on, Y/n/n. Lets get back on the dance floor" He cheers, grabbing my hand and leading me back into the crowd.

*TIME SKIP Brought to you by Wet Ones (keeping things wet since 1988)*

I was suprised that I didnt get as drunk as Tyler intended to. In fact, I was pretty sober enough to solve a math equation. Funny how Tyler wanted me to get drunk, and he was the one who got intoxicated.

We were grooving next to a barricade that blocked off a private room. I held my phone up over my head as Tyler stood behind me. I started recording us dancing, just to save the memory. I swayed my hips to the beat, giggling at how goofy I was. I held the phone at the tip of my fingers, trying to get him and I in one shot. Accidently, I dropped it behind the barricaded. I groaned bending over the barricade. I was so close to reaching it, but my arm wasnt long enough. I, stupidly, went farther over the barricade, finally reaching my phone. Suddenly, I felt hands on my hips, pulling me back. I began to squirm, trying to make the hands release me, but I only turn around to see Tyler. He had a look of stone as an expression. He almost looked...mad?

He let go of my hips, suddenly grabbing my hand. He started making his way out of the club, dragging me towards the exit. "Tyler? What is it?" I ask, trying free my hand, but his grip only gets tighter. What has gotten into him? We storm out of the club, his face still stone cold.

The rest of our little walk was a blurr. No talking, just silence and some of the crickets chirping around us. It was an awkward silence, him still holding my wrist, but not as tightly as before, and his face as serious as before. Was it something I did? What if he just drops me home and I never speak to him again? What did I do to diserve this? A million of questions and concerns filled my mind, making my heart beat sprint faster.

Before I knew it, I was at Tyler's house, in his room, on his bed. He paced around the room, staring at the posters around the area. The silence was unbarable. I hid my face in my palms, thinking of what to say to him or what to do. I quickly stand up from the bed, looking over to him; he looked back. "Tyler, I- Tell me whats wrong? Was it something I did? What-" I start to say, but was cut off by a kiss.

I was suprised at first, being taken off cause the gesture was so out of place, but after a couple seconds, I kissed back. The make out was over all rough; he grabbed the sides of my head, pulling us deeper into kiss. I felt him push forward, making me back up untill I hit the wall. He moved his hands down the the sides of my neck, holding it gently. His thumb brushed across an area that made me jump a little. I felt him smirk againts my lips, moving his mouth down from mine, to my jawline. He nibbled and sucked on my jaw. I silently moaned, placing my hand on his shoulder. I bit my lip, trying to quiet myself down so I wasnt too loud.

"Y/n, you have no idea how long I have wanted this" He huffed againts my jaw, putting my skin between his teeth. He brough his head back up, locking his eyes with mine. "Your so beautiful, baby" He groans, kissing me roughly. I moaned into the kiss, trying to match his movements. "The way you...brushed your perfect...little ass againts me" He whispers between kisses. He brough his hand up and cupped my ear, rubbing my lobe gently. "And I..." He groaned. "Do not share" He put his index finger againts my lip. I faintly smirked, bringing out my tounge and licking the skin. Tyler's eyes fluttered closed, biting his lip. "Your such a tease, Y/n" He says through gritted teeth.

He pulled out his finger, wiping it clean on his shirt. I giggled softly, pulling my bottom lip between my teeth. He looked at me with the same cold expression he had before, making a chill run up and down my back. He stepped closer to me, even though we were already face to face. He slid his hands around my waste; anywhere and everywhere he touched made a trail of warmth. I eyeballed his hand, which was making its way up my cut off sweater. I held my hands behind my back, holding my hand with the other. I look up to his beautifle face, admiring it. He smirks, looking up to me and locking eyes. I couldnt take it anymore. I instantly cupped his face with my hands, kissing him. I needed more of him, God he was perfect...

We went back in the past; him bringing his hand up and cupping it around my neck, brushing his thumb across the same area that made me jump. Tyler smirked againts my lips, slowly inching his way down to my jawline, like before. He didnt stay at my jawbone for long, because before I knew it, he was going down on my neck, sucking the skin and nibbling on it. I let out a groan, biting my lip and trying to keep myself quiet. "My parents arnt home....be as loud as you want, babygirl" He said between bites and kisses againts my neck, suddenly finding my sweet spot with a pinch. I let out a moan, following his information. He snickerd againts my neck, sucking the spot harder, making a hickey form. I gently hold on to his head, not wanting him to stop.

Once he was satisfied with the small purple bruise on my neck, he departured from my neck with a slight pop. He locks a gaze with me, his eyes reading lust. We bothed giggled. He grabbed my waist, ordering my to jump. I do as told, wrapping my legs around his waste and arms around his neck. I look down at him, rubbing my nose againts his. He smiles his cute smile, flashing his teeth. While he started walking towards the bed, I took matters into my own hands and took off my crop top. He tossed me onto the bed, watching me bounce up and down the springs. He didnt hesitate to jump onto to my right away, laying over me and continuing out make out session.

Tyler tangled his hands in my hair as I did the same to him, gripping the sides of his hips with my legs as he began to slowly grind on me. He reattached his lips to mine, kissing with force. He slid his tongue into my mouth without permission, making me relize he liked his dominance. Teasingly, I bit his tongue gently, just to see his reaction. He smiled againts my lips, "Better watch it, doll." Oh, Damn. That name gave me chills up and down my back. He must have noticed my goosebumps, because he smirked and started rubbing my prickled arm gently. "You like that name, dont you doll" I bit my lip, nodding intensly to try to shake away another chill. He chuckled darkly, returning his attention back to lips, then neck.

He inched his way down to my jawline, sucking and nibbling on the skin. I let out a breath, feeling the tension slip away. Damn, hes good at this. "Do me a favor and take this shirt off before I rip it off" He orders, feeling the material of my cut off sweater. "Its actually a crop top, but ok" I reply with a bitchy attitude, smirking as I take off my crop. "I said watch it, doll. I dont wanna gag you now" He warned, suddenly grabbing my chin and jerked it so I was facing him. "You got it?" He asks, using his tiny thumb (sorry not sorry) to carress my bottom lip. I nod slowly, gulping down the lump in my throat. "Answer me verbally" He barks, holding my chin tighter. "Yes, daddy" I answer, smirking internally. I can tell he is taken back by this, due to the squint in his eyes. "What did you say?" He asks, smiling a little. "Yes, daddy" I repeat, biting down on his thumb a little. "Damn, this is gonna be fun" He says, removing his hand from my chin and pushing me back down on the bed.

He continues his kissing trails, down from my lower neck, to my belly button, not missing a beat or even hesitating. I arch my back a little, letting my hands roam blindly behind me, starting to try and unhook my bra. I reach my goal, throwing my black lace bra aside. He glances at the thrown peice of clothing, only to put his attention to me. "Jeez, your perfect" He says, biting his lip as he reaches hands out forward to touch my breasts. One of his fingers trace my nipple, making it harden quickly and I gasp. He snickers darkly, finally kneading both of my breasts gently. I let out a breath of relazation as Tyler kneads both of my tits, letting my eyes flutter closed. Suddenly, I feel a wetness on my left one, making me relize he has attached his mouth to it. I let out a soft moan, feeling him nibble and suck on the sensitive skin. With the other hand on my right breast, he used his thumb to circle over the nipple, making it harder than I thought it could ever be. I groan in fustration. Tyler gotta take his old sweet time, dont he?

He finally left my chest, looking over my breasts to see his work. I look down, noticing not one, but several bruises scattered all over the area. I could see the proudness in his eyes, his lips spreading with satistfactory. I giggled at him, moving hair away from my face. He pushes me on the chest, making me lay back down. I do as told, making sure im comfortable, since I know I wont be leaving this position anytime soon.

He starts off where he left off; circling kisses around my belly button to tease me. I hum, licking my lips then biting them. He finally answered my prayers, and continued his trail of kisses downward, heading towards my clothed pelvis. I wiggled slightly, letting him know I was getting sick of his teasing. He smirked, "Patience, doll" He said, toying with the edge of my shorts. I groaned in fustration, and somewhat pleasure. The feeling of Tyler Joseph touching me this way felt almost, illegal, which turned me on more. He was an illegal boy.

He started tugging down my jeans, trying to slide them off. I lifted my hips upward, helping him take them off. He reached his goal and threw the shorts to Narnia. "The grand prize" He mutters, poking at my entrance through my panties. I giggle, moaning slightly at the feeling.

He teases my clothed access point with his middle finger. "Are you gonna be all nice and wet for me, doll?" He asks, glancing up to me. If he keeps on playing with this Doll kink I have, I might just cum at his words. Suddenly, slides a finger in between my folds, slightly moving my panties out of the way. We both gasp; him surprised of how wet I am and me incredibly horny. "D-drenched" He stuttered, chuckling darkly as he began to slowly curl them. I tangle my hands in my hair, my mouth wide open as I take in a deep breath. Letting out a moan, I scrunch my face up. I havent felt like this in a long time, I forgot what it was like to have someone else's fingers in me!

He continued to hook his middle didget, untill I was panting and moaning his name. "Oh my God, Daddy, shit!" I practically scream, removing my hands from my hair and gripping the sheets. I could see the smirk poking out of his mouth, curling his finger more. I bit my lip and gripped the sheets harder untill my knuckles were white, the skin on my lips breaking away from my teeth, and my eyes squinting shut. I didnt want to be too loud, thinking the neighbors would come over and ruin the fun. "I dont hear you crying out for me, doll. I know you got it in you" He suddenly, some how, thrusts his finger deeper, making me moan out his nickname. Tyler must have gotten an idea, because he uncurled his finger, and started to thrust his middle digit in and out at a moderate pace. I loosened the grip I had on the sheets, still feeling pleasurable, but somewhat relaxed.

He suddenly took out his finger, leaving me cold. He leaned over me, ordering me to open my mouth. I obeyed, opening it wide. He stuck his wet finger into my mouth, almost all the way down to my throat. I twirl my tongue around it, humming. His eyes fluttered shut, him mouthing the word 'Fuck'. "Damn, I love you, dollface" He said, replacing his digit with his mouth. He was rough and needy in the kiss; my own were probably hungry and begging.

He broke away from the kiss, kneeling back down in front of me. He toyed with the stretchy part of my panties, twisting and feeling the lacey material. I hummed, "Please", barley above a whisper. "Please what?" He asked sharply, scratching my hip bone as he continued to fondle with my underwear. I whimpered, "Please daddy" He smirks at how much control he has over me. Finally, he begins to slide my lingerie down, taking his good old sweet time. I lift my hips slightly as the material skates across my hips, exposing my woman hood. I close my legs as I feel the mixture of Tyler's breathing, and the rush of cold air. Trying to regain the moment, I use my toe to point to where he should throw my lingerie. He snickers, throwing it to where I pointed. "Dont be shy, love" He says in a relaxing tone, resting his hands on my knees. I nodded, letting him spread my legs apart. He let my legs fall to my sides, me finally relaxing, knowing Tyler wont judge. "How can you be shy when you have such a beautiful pussy?" He says, gently rubbing his hand over the wetness thats in my thighs. I choke out a quiet moan, hanging my head back.

Suddenly, he slides 2 fingers in, making me gasp and moan in surprise. It could have been an accident from how wet I was. Either way, he started thrusting his fingers in and out slowly, my body shriveled from pleasure. I heard the sloshiness sound between my thighs as he picked up the pace, him whispering and praising me for how good and obediant I was. I felt the pooling in my stomach increase in intensity as he continued to thrust his fingers in and out. "Oh my God, Fucking hell-Im so close!" I moan out, gripping the sheets roughly. Tyler smirks, picking up his other hand and placing it on my clit, rubbing it hard. I scrunch my face up, preparing for my orgasm.

As time progresses and his fingers continue, I was a moaning mess; hair in my face, lipstick smudged from Tyler's passionate kisses, and just a something you would expect a girl to look like in a porno. He took his fingers off my clit, putting them to his side. Just as I was about to cum, his digits made a 'come hither' motion inside me, making me lose myself and fall over the edge. I fell hard, my body quaking with pleasure as Tyler's fingers didnt slow down. It was like I was falling from the sky, and I wasnt even close to the ground. The corners of my eyes faded to a foggy eroma as I scrunch my eyes and let out the biggest pornographic moan I could make.

I came down from my high, hitting the ground as he pulled out his fingers. Unexpectantly, he brought his tongue down on my folds, giving it a long and slow lick, adding overstimulation. I moaned, what almost seemed like a cry, in pleasure, gripping the sheets for some support. He tried to stay away from my clit, knowing I was already overstimulated enough. I could tell Tyler enjoyed my juices, from the noise he created, vibrating againts my womanhood; making me moan louder. He gave one last lick, making sure to get my clit before lifting his head up. He ran a finger up my folds, collecting the wetness onto his finger. I whimpered, biting my lip. He fit his digit into his mouth, letting his eyes flutter close at the taste. He groaned, taking out his finger with a pop, "You taste amazing-almost like peaches covered in honey" He informed, leaning over me. I giggled as he placed his red, swollen lips onto mine. Letting him gain entrance into my mouth, I tasted myself on his tongue, making the experience even more thrilling.

He pulled away, ordering me to sit on the edge of the bed. I do as told, crawling over to the edge as I watch his sit down on the bed, kicking his shoes off. He layed againts the frame of crib as he started to unbuckle his belt. I shoo his hand away, taking matters into my own palms. He smiled, putting his hands down on his sides. Once I figured out how to unbuckle his sash, I start tugging them down, Tyler lifting his hips up to help me. I threw them to WhoVille blindly, staring at the growing bulge that is still clothed; but not for long.

I tease the erection with my hand, squeezing and feeling it up and down. He groaned in pleasure, tilting his head back so it hit the wall. I smirked up to him, snaking a hand into his boxers and feeling his cock. I recieved a gasp from him, probably cause my hands were a little warm, but still gave him pleasure. With my other hand, I slid down his briefs with no trouble, throwing them somewhere in the room. I took my hand off of his shaft and spat on it, soon returning my palm to it. I began to slowly pump it, recieving low groans and moans. I really want to tease him...but would he approve? Fuck it, im gonna do it. I use my index finger to gently rub the slit of hit cock, moving it downward from the shaft to the end. "Stop teasing me doll, you wont like the outcome" He growls, biting his lip. I giggle, staring at the beads of pre cum oozing out of the slit.

I lifted my head up so it was in birds eye view of his dick. Suddenly, I felt a hand snake through my hair, pulling it out of my face. I glance up and smile as I began to slowly ease my head down on to the bell like tip. I swirled my tongue around the point of it, using my other hand to pump what I didnt have in my mouth. Tyler groaned in satisfactory, letting his eyes close. "I said, stop teasing" He ordered, putting pressure on the back of my head. I slowly slid my mouth down his shaft, him still pushing my head down. I hallowed my cheeks and slacked my jaw, giving him full power of my mouth. His grip on my hair tightens as he begins to bob my head up and down, the wetness of my mouth sloshing with each bob. He gives an 'Ah Fuck', paired with a strangled groan; by far the best noise I heard come out of his swollen mouth.

After a couple of bobs, I figured he wanted to take matters into his own hands, because he starting thrusting his hips up; or in other  words, fucking my mouth. A couple of times, I felt his tip rub the back of my throat, causing me to gag. I moaned around his cock, blinking away tears. "Im almost finished with you doll, just a little bit longer" He explained, his thrusts growing faster and harsher. I nodded, gripping the bed sheets to prepare. I felt his cock twitch in my throat, expecting him to be pushed over the edge; but I thought wrong. He instantly stopped, pulling me off of his throbbing cock with a pop. I looked at him with confusion, rubbing my eyes that were filled with tears, "But you didnt cum yet" I said, making it almost sound like a question. He nodded, "Waiting is the best part. And Id rather cum in that sweet little pussy of yours anyway" He says, adding a wink. I blush intensly, moving my face away from his crotch.

Tyler orders me to take is place, laying my head on the pillows. I do as told, watching him remove his shirt and socks. Once he was out of the way, I sit back, placing my head on a pillow and putting one in the small of my back. He climbed on top of me, letting me take a moment to scan his torso; Tan chest, ink painted into his skin, and the skinny, but muscular, torso of his. He took a grip onto his shaft, teasing my folds with it, making sure it was wet enough. I let out a gasp, moaning slightly. "Are you ready, doll?" He asks, laying his face down in the crew of my neck. "Y-yes" I choke out, biting my lip in anticipation. Immediatly, he thrusted his cock into my enterance, letting out a groan. I nearly drew blood from my lip I was biting so hard. I didnt know he was that big. I sucked his dick, how did I not know?! I whimpered, then moaning; I have never felt so full in my life. I saw Tyler struggling over me, fighting the urge to move. I turned my head, facing over to his ear, "Destroy me" I whispered, smirking internally. His control breaks, he begins to slam into me rapidly, building an incredible rythem that took away my breath. The muscles in his arms stand out above me, holding himself over me, angling each thrust to hit that one spot inside of me that brought me to life earlier.

"Holy, T-tyler!" I scream, wrapping my arms around him, trying to find support for the massive sex we were having. Suddenly, he grabbed the base of my throat, pressing down hard. "What did you say?" He asks harshly, making his thrusts deeper and harder. I grab his wrist, moving it up so it held at the mid of my throat. He smirked, finding a new kink I had. Tyler Joseph holding my throat like this was almost illegal, like taboo; that turned me on more. He answered my wishes, squeezing the middle tighter. "D-daddy!" I corrected in a strangled moan, throwing my head back in pleasure. He was fucking me with such force that the bed frame knocked againts the wall with each thrust. Once again, I felt the pooling in my stomach stirr up. I clenched around him, letting out a pornographic moan. "Close already doll? Pathetic" He spat, saliva sprayed onto my chest, dripping down over my breasts. "Im-oh my God, Im so close!" I scream. He smirked, suddenly slowing down his thrusts. I let out a sigh, feeling relaxed. 

He threw the pillow that was under my back to the side, replacing it with his hands. He picked me up, his cock sliding out of me with a pop. He picked me up as I wrapped my legs around him. He carried me to a local wall, nearly slamming me againts it. He placed his forarm over my throat, holding me inplace againts the wall. "Get ready to start screaming" He simply said, sliding back into me. I let out a groan, my wishes being fuffiled with his raging cock. He instantly started fucking me againts the wall. This position was amazing, he was able to get all the places he couldnt have gotten before. My eyes squeezed shut at the pleasure raking through my body; it hurt so much, but damn I needed this from Tyler Robert Joseph. "I-Im gonna cum, oh fucking HELL!" I scream, seeing black spots appear infront of me as I open my eyes. "Im not fucking done with you just yet, hold it in" He barks, some how fucking me faster. I moaned as I hit my head againts the wall, pleasure struckin. I held onto my orgasm, trying not to let it slip out of my clutch, but with the force Tyler was fucking me at, and the moans and groans coming from his mouth let me loose it.

I didnt have time to warn him that I was about to cum, it just happened. I rolled my eyes back into my head as I clenched around his cock. I moan in pure ecstasy as I cum around his throbbing shaft, closing my eyes tightly. "Since you like to cum without my permission, your gonna c-cum again" He spat, snaking a hand between us and rubbing my clit. I gasped, letting out the loudest pornagraphic moan I could let out. I grabbed the wrist that was rubbing my clit, scrunching my face up and panting histeracally. He smirked and started rubbing faster anyway. I used my other hand to try and push him away; the pleasure was over whelming my body. "Ah ah no you dont" He says, making his forearm push harder on my throat. I lost my oxygen, losing my voice and my energy, closing my eyes. "D-daddy, F-fu-cking he-ll!" I choke out, whimpering. "Hold on, im almost there" He warns, letting his mouth gape open. "Look at me, dollface" He says, removing his hand from my clit and cupping it to my chin. "Let me see those pretty eyes" He says, biting his lip. I open my eyes, staring into his own. They where dialated, the cocoa color ablaze. He panted out a moan, mouth gaping. "Oh-oh, fucking-" He choked out as he spilled into me. His cock twitched and throbbed, triggering my 3rd orgasm. I milked his cock with my convulsing walls, both of us pleasure struckin and talking like we were in a pornographic film. Curses and moans and groans fell from both of our mouths as we rode out our orgasms till we were both too sensitive to continue on.

Tyler leaned his forehead against mine, both of us still out of breath. We shared a laugh at how shook we were. "I cant move" I whisper out, my voice a little horse from my screaming and moaning earlier. "I dont want to move" I add, letting out a sigh. "Me either, Y/n" He says, his voice deep. "I could keep you like this all day and night and not get sick of it" He says, moving away from the wall slowly. I wrap my arms around him for support as he starts to walk back to the bed.

With all the energy he had left, he carefully laid me down on one side; using all of his strength to limp to the other. He plopped down onto the bed, sprawling out. We both inhaled and exhaled deeply, turning our heads to look at each other. "Should I walk you to your house?" He asks, holding out a hand to my cheek, rubbing the skin. I smile faintly, "Ill make up some excuse that I needed some alone time or something-I dont know" I shrug weakly. He smiles his cute smile, the one that was near and dear to his heart. "Im suggesting you wanna sleep over here?" He says, getting under the bed covers. I join with him, "Is that alright with you?" I ask in a sarcastic tone, grinning like a goofball. "Does a piano have a G note?" He says sarcastically. "Ill take that as a yes" I answer, cuddling up to him. He wraps his arm around me, my head laying on his inked chest. "Night, Joseph" I say, only above a whisper. "Night, Doll" ............. I open my eyes to rays of sunshine displayed on the ends of the bed. I feel Tyler playing with my hair, stroking my forehead and running his hands through strands. "Good morning" I whisper, smiling faintly. "Mornin'" He says, turning me so im facing him. We look into our eyes for a little bit; not moving or speaking. All of the sudden, we hear steps from outside the door. Our eyes opened in shock, his big brown pupils shaking in terror of what was about to happen. Neither of us moved, only stared. The door suddenly opened, revealing the one and only, Kelly Joseph. "Tyler, honey! Breakfast is re-TYLER! YOUR IN BIG TROUBLE MISTER!"

(I hope you enjoyed the laughs and pleasures and pains my fanfic has brought to you. Sometimes its nice to have an intense sex dream with Tyler Joseph. But truly, I hope Tyler doesn't read this lol. But anyway, I hope you liked it and cya next time :D)

[1a-little-obsessed1-blog]

Its different now... A Nash Grier Imagine (This is linked to my previous series)

Its been 3 years since Nash And I broke up. I’m 19 Now living in London happy, Mahogany, Shawn and I were still as close as we were when i left maybe even more. My dad remarried to my amazing step mum Cheryl and i now have a cute 13 year old step sister called Tori and a baby Half brother Ace he’s only 1 month and hes adorable! I haven’t really heard from Nash but i guess i’ve moved on. I was beginning my first year in a photography and arts University in central London.

Wednesday 8th September 2016

I wake up to a new day 6:00 AM sharp. I have a warm shower and put on my outfit for my first day at uni. I wore a Blue hoodie with a white tanktop and Black jeans, I then put on a pair of white jeans and white Vans. I run down stairs and pour some Granola, Fruits and yogurt in a bowl and i then get a 1 Liter Bottle of orange juice out if the fridge and guzzle it down with my breakfast. I run back upstairs and put a headband on, I then lightly applied some makeup to my face and then put my glasses on. I put my backpack on my shoulders and run downstairs to see my little sis sitting there all ready to go to school waiting for me as usual. I sit next to her and stuff fruits into my bag. “Hey whats up T” (T is her nickname)

“Nothing much... Jazz?”(She calls me jazz because When i first met her i gave her jazz hands trying to look cool)

“Yeah?”

“Can we go to some meet up after school today... Like you pick me up and ill go with you...”

“Sure you do whatever you want but just dont expect me to join in im probably gonna be face timing Shawn and Mahogany”

“Ok whatever i just really wanna go because theres gonna be a bunch of youtubers and i cant wait sqeeeeee!!!”

“Ok OK I get it your excited c’mon let go ill drop you off at school, oh yeah we cant be long after school i have alot of video editing for my channel.”

“OK one sec let me get my bag...” she runs to the livving room and throws her bag over her arms.

We walk to school i drop her off and then catch a train to West minister After that it’s a ten minute walk from the train station.

~Skip to the end of the day~

My day at school wasn’t bad it was ok, i didn’t have any friends but i wasn’t too bothered since i’m kinda Introverted. I kept to myself being eyed down here and there by guys. The end of the day rolled around and i went to go pick up my sweet lil sis. I wait for her outside her school gates and she runs to give me a hug. We then walk to A small community center it was packed with girls wearing t-shirts that had the number 97 on them I felt like something wasn’t adding up. I felt a presence a familiar presence a warm loving one. We we waited in line for whatever Tori wanted us to go for. I just stood with her on my phone looking through my social media. I then hear the voice of a young man I look up from my phone and see... Nash... He looked around and we made ye contact, instantly i turned my head and something went off. thats when it hit me “Shit... why the fuck is Nash here... what have i done..” I mutter to myself and before i knew it we were at the front of the line. I covered one of my eyes with my fringe and plastered a smile on my face. Tori screams and hugs him, he didn't notice me standing beside her... i think. she then got him to sign her planner. she then takes a selfie with him and then my sister did the stupidest ever.

“Hey Jaz come take a picture with Nash” She said oblivious to why i was trying to avoid Nash.

“Huhh? I’ll pass...” I shrugged and held her hand tight.

“C’mon let my fix your hair...” She brushed my fringe off my face and neatly tucked it behind my ear.

“T come on let go before mum and da-” I was cut off by Nash.

“Zahra?”

I was silent for 5 seconds straight. I then plastered a smile on my face and said. “Nash.. Long time no see....Ahem. well me and Tori are gonna leave now byeeeee!!!”

“No Zahra wait...” He grabbed my arm.

“What Nash. What do you want im over you.” I felt bad why can’t i just keep my fat gob shut.

“Zahra.... please?” I could hear the same disappointment in his voice from the day i left.

“I’m sorry... i shouldn’t have said that. Here its my Dads card it has my house phone number on it.” I look in my wallet and hand him a card. I then walk away dragging Tori with me. We were only like a block away from home, we both never spoke a word to each other.

“Jazz how does Nash Grier know you?”

“Long story short , I met him when i was fifteen we dated and then I decided it wouldn’t work because long distance relationships were not really my thing.”

“YOU GUYS DATED?! how did you not tell me?!”

“I didnt really think it mattered.”

“Its ok i still love you.” she put on a silly face.

We walked into the house and were hit by a wave of crying coming from baby ace. I go to the living room where i see Cheryl going insane. “Need a little help i think my baby brother missed me.” I take the baby out of her arms and cuddle him, eventually he opens his eyes and smiles. I smile at him and he falls asleep and that smile slowly fades away. The house phone rings and i pick up.

“Hello, This is miss Zahra Korra Marglin speaking who is this?”

“Hey its Nash...”

“Oh. hi.” Ace starts crying.

“Is that a baby?” He asks.

“Yeah one second.” I then focus on my baby brother. “It’s ok Baby Ace I’m here ive got you..” I rock him to sleep.

“Wow that was quick” He sounded like there was something on his ind he really had to get off.

“I’ve been really busy  with school, youtube and my baby brother lately sorry if he cries again.”

“It’s fine... Look Zahra. I still love you.I love everything about you. I dont know why your avoiding me. i just wan to ask you if i’ve  done anything wrong.”

“No. you haven’t done anything wrong. Things are different now. I’m grown up its been three years we’ve drifted apart.” I feel a tear run down my cheek and fall onto Ace’s face.

“You wanted me to leave and thats what i did. What you said to me at the airport before you left. I really thought about it. We crossed paths ii came back give me chance please...”

“Ill think about it. Im gonna go out for a run around Primrose hill. ill call you later bye”

“Bye.”

*Hangs up*

I put Ace down in his baby bouncer and call Tori down to look after him.

“T just look after him i’m gonna go out for a run see ya”

I run out the door before she could give me a response. I started running and then i started walking. I slowed down and started walking around. I was walking past an ally way before a drunk man came and grabbed my by the arm. I Scream for him to let go but the louder i got the tighter his grip became.”Get the fuck o-off me” I then see someone appear and punch the man in the face. The man then Let go and scampered away. I looked up at the mystery guy who was towering over me.  “Wh-Who are you? And why didn’t you just leave me?” The guy took his hood off and revealed The same boy i fell in love with three years ago.

“why would i leave my one and only?” Nash said.

I hugged him tight.

“I knew you’d come back” I whisper to him.

“I could never leave you.”

“Can we go home please its a bit cold...”

I take him home and sneak him up to my room. I didn’t care when i was getting dressed for bed i just Got dressed in front of him.

“Damn your such a tease!” he says laying down on my bed.

“I bet that makes you want me more...” I say a little flirtatious.

“Damn since when did you start talking like that?! I aint complaining”

“I was forced to watch Fifty Shades Of Grey you really dont thing im a changed girl?”

“Who would do that?!”

“Jack G who els? But honestly i don’t care if i undress in front of you. Your my boyfriend arent you?” I give him a smirk.he then gets up and walks behind me wrapping his arms around my waist.

“You dont know how long ive wanted to see you...”

“Babe.. Can we continue. from where we left off 3 years ago.”

“Of course.”

He laid down on the bed and i sat on top of his bare chest and kissed him. we then fell asleep in the arms of one another.

[im-reed-ing]

tagged by: @heroiiic u are a cool person and I am a chicken nugget thats too scared of bothering u on discord, but if my phone wasn't physically broken id share u a screenshot every time soren came to say hi to me in FEH

rules: answer 30 questions and tag 10 blogs you would like to get to know better.

((alright but when have I ever followed the rules...... just sayin))

1. nicknames: reed... uh..... sometimes ppl call me weed to mock me but then i just punch them and its good (just kdding im weak as shit)

2. gender: hey so i find that if you don't identify yourself, people you talk to online are less likely to preemptively subconsciously stereotype you and therefore judge you before really getting to know you. So let's keep it that way. Unlock lvl 3 friendship before I reveal who I truly am to you LMFAO

3. Star sign: aries grr!

4. Height: 5'5", maybe 5'6" ??? idk man all i know is my little sister is taller than me and it makes me mad bc I personally am not that short!!!!

5. time: 2:16 am

6. bday: March 22

7. favorite bands: well shit uh, Sakanaction, Bump of Chicken, Dogcatcher, The Oh Hellos, FOB, Unison Square Garden.... im sure im missing something but... o well.

8. Favorite Solo Artist: I can't choose so u get all of em. Hachi (Yonezu Kenshi), Aimer, Sasakure.UK, Harito, Keichi Okabe, EMI EVANS god ,,, As well as a collection of, indie people,... and anyone that did the drakengard/nier osts / gravity rush 1 & 2 Osts, wow. seriuosly. Amazing.

9. Song stuck in my head right now: Douse shinundakara, (its a lie that its not stuck right now but its been for the past few days!) because I found the jp translation and made english lyrics and have been practicing hittin those high notes in the car on the way to school LMFAO.... same with hoshii no kieta by Aimer.;..... its like car karaoke hawhaw

10. Last movie I saw was. Uh. UHHH. In theaters, it was Hitmans Bodyguard, which by the way was campy and ridiculous and pretty funny if seen with the right people.

11. Last show I watched: was Rick and Morty, earlier today, in my school lounge on my computer. s3 ep 7 is really, really good. Like really good. It's also pretty fucked up.

12. when I created this blog: its been. A very. long time. this blog has only really ever been for reblogs... if u wanna chat w me find a discord server im part of and bother me there... or pm me, because i prefer one on one conversations even if im shit at keeping them going.

13. what I post: oh shit i answered this one already by accident OOPS UHHHH i reblog good art, shitty memes, and PSA's that I think are important. Im here to haev a good time. I have a seperate art blog that's in my about tab so there's that.

14. last thing I googled: the definition of the word galvanized. I am now slightly more verbose.

15. do I have any other blogs: like, two. artblog, old blog where I uploaded covers when I was in middle school, and a personal vent blog.... i accidently reblogged something to there though so I deleted it oops lmfao. But its ok, it was meant to be ephemeral and writing my thoughts down is therapeutic so I'll make another one once again.

16. do I get asks: literally never. Not even bots, LMFAO.

17. why did i choose my url: I've stuck with the name Reed for a really long time now but its also a pretty generic name, so i came up with this shitty pun and it stuck. it's probably my steam username too but like shifted around a little. any time i can't get 'reed' as a username i default to im.reed.ing or something like that.

18. followers: whoa, 175, really???? I get the impression that quite a few of them are inactive though, or i post so irregularly and infrequently that no one ever sees my posts LOL.

19. following: 380 and still counting. I turn on notifs for artblogs I really like!!! >;3

20. favorite snack for movie/tv: Honestly I used to not chow much while watching or itd be something generic like chips, but recently I started marathoning naruto of all things w a friend and we go to the asian supermarket beforehand and we get like a bunch of popped rice chips or sweets and various foods and some iteration of hi-chews and THAT is my favorite marathon snack tbh.

21. average hours of sleep: NEVER ENOUGH. It goes from like 2-3 hours on days when i have no self ocntrol... to like 12-16 on days when i... have no... self control.... lays down slowlyl.....

22. wHAT THE HECK THERES NO NUMVER 22 TRIKEY skdjhfksu cMON MANG

23. lucky number: my rng is shit but my favorite number is 4 because someone dear to me likes that number... but also because 4 is unlucky in some places, which I identify with.... but also bc 4 is the # of sides in a square/diamond, and squares are perfect and good shit and  aesthetic. My boyfriend is a squa-- //kicked jk jk  ramiel is a octohedron, i take it bac k ....

24. instrument: i can play the piano (barely) but I used to also do violin trumpet and a teeny bit of flute.... learned the ocarina too bc im a zelda nerd, and I dont mean that silly little 4-hole one. But I also sing and stuff and have been actively practicing, one day ill make a decent cover and learn to mix and be one of dem cool youtaites..... lays down slowly. this is fine.

25. what I am wearing right now: a lot of things,,, a watch, a hyper light drifter sweater. headphones, underwear, pants, a tshirt, socks, existential dread... u name it lol.

26. first celeb crush: since i honestly never cared much for real life celebrities, i'll just give you my anime/video game crushes instead and like...... wow i can't honestly remember my first ones???? oh shit wait OK it was probably both ashitaka and san, my first ghibli movie was mononokehime...  they are just so freaking coo l... ok thtas a lie i lowkey wanted to BE them. Both of them.

.... idk man u cant ask an aroace person what their crushes were bc idk what those are!!! I assume u just really really really like something/someone and thats that, I GUESS??? I wanted to be link too once upon a time. And nausicaa. and a good chunk of the soul calibur 2 cast, and starfire from oldtimey teen titans. i was a simple child ok???

27. dream job: listen thats complicated idk about what my dreams are for a job, but I do want to be an animator and a storyboarder and a game developer and a game tester and a movie critic and a cinematographer and a director and a story lead and an illustrator at some point, and gotta try it before I can knock it ya know?

28. Dream trip: anywhere, so long as its with the people I really love. One day, I'll pack a few things into my car and run away for a little while. I'll come back some day! But for those long hours on the road with another person or two, marvelling quietly at the world around them as it passes and listening to music in the car... that sounds like a nice temporary reprieve.

29. favorite food: i fucken love poki bowl. SPICY SEAFOOD + RICE YAAAaaas

30. nationality: was born in murica, but both my parents are immigrants from now-ukraine. So we all speak russian at home lul.

tagging people: ha, tags are for nerds. @one-becomes-two @trash-knights @nhiners @awishwee @deerwood @montejeska @queenchro @chicken-mcnobody DONT HAVE ANY MORE BLOGS I CAN REMEMBER this will have to do.