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embermc · 3 years

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he’s been fucking locked up for like four months in OUR time who knows how long in canon, getting starved and literally tortured daily he’s not harming anyone 🤦🏽‍♀️ if the book is really that harmful you’d want everyone who ever comes into possession with it dead then, right? which is fucked up. if tubbo gets ahold of the book you’re not gonna try to write a block of text saying that it’ll be the right thing to do to ‘exterminate tubbo’ bc the rest of the server is now ‘in danger.’

you don’t have write analyses trying to convince urself that tommy has some elaborate selfless ploy he literally just hates dream and wants him dead 😭😭 jfc at least try to see the story from a non bias character perspective HELPP

okay. pay attention to my wording, specifically on that post.

“It's something c!Tommy views as necessary.”

“Since c!Dream has the revive book memorized, the only way, in c!Tommy's eyes, to ensure that more people aren't hurt by c!Dream, is to kill c!Dream both so that information is lost forever, and so that c!Dream can't try and kill anymore people.”

“He even flat-out heard c!Dream talk about how, when he escapes prison, he's going to get his revenge on the server.”

Anon, my “analysis trying to convince myself that Tommy has some elaborate selfless ploy” is literally using the information that c!Tommy has himself. c!Tommy does not know about the torture, doesn’t know much about the starvation. He has visited c!Dream a total of twice. The last time Tommy saw Dream, Dream literally told him, word-for-word, that he was going to escape the prison and revive Wilbur. Tommy saw firsthand how c!Dream used the revive book to kill him and bring him back to life solely to prove a point, and then call himself “a god.”

c!Tommy has no reason to believe that c!Dream will not do the same thing again, or do what he literally told c!Tommy he was planning on doing. To c!Tommy, this literally is a matter of protecting the server. From the information he has, it is completely understandable for him to draw the conclusion that c!Dream is a danger. I am not out here advocating murder, anon. I wrote about c!Tommy’s intentions, and why he is going to try to kill c!Dream as a way to protect the server from what he believes, understandably, from what he’s heard, to be a legitimate threat. We don’t know if c!Dream is still a threat. We have not seen him in like a month and a half. But from the information c!Tommy currently possesses, he draws the best conclusion that he can, which is that c!Dream is, indeed, a threat. This is a conclusion that a viewer can draw, as well, but I’m merely speaking from what c!Tommy believes here.

The point of my post was to show that c!Tommy is not doing this purely as a punishment or consequence because he hates c!Dream, he’s legitimately trying to do what he thinks is necessary in order to get rid of what he perceives, understandably from what he’s seen, to be a serious threat.

As for c!Tommy “just wanting Dream dead” and it not being more about protecting the server and preventing future tragedies, here’s some of c!Tommy’s quotes from Tommy’s revival stream:

“You’re too powerful. You’re too powerful.”

“Dream, Dream. You are nothing, you’re nothing, you’re fine, Dream. We can be friends, if you don’t bring him back. You’re not even...all the tragedies you’ve done-”

“You can’t have this power...You have to die. You...Dream? I have to kill you. This isn’t even a matter of disliking you or not. Disregard all of our previous entanglements! You have to die.“

First off, c!Tommy flat-out states it for me. It’s not about hating or disliking c!Dream. He flat-out says to disregard their past, and that his current intentions of killing c!Dream aren’t, for the most part, about his hatred of c!Dream. c!Tommy wanting to kill c!Dream was prompted after Dream admit he burned the revival book, threatened to revive Wilbur, and threatened to keep killing and reviving c!Tommy. c!Tommy says it plainly: “You’re too powerful.” That’s why he needs to kill c!Dream. “Needs”, that’s also another powerful word here. c!Tommy accentuates the word “needs.” To him, c!Dream needs to die. He didn’t say “I want you to die.” He said, “I need you to die.” To c!Tommy, c!Dream’s death is a necessity, to prevent what c!Tommy fully believes that c!Dream will do to him and the server.

I also want to point out how c!Tommy tries using other methods of negotiation first, before deciding to kill c!Dream. When c!Dream threatens to use his knowledge of revival to revive c!Wilbur, Tommy literally tries pleading with him. In fact, Tommy literally offers to be Dream’s friend. c!Tommy offers to be his abuser’s, somebody he hates, friend. As long as c!Dream doesn’t bring back c!Wilbur. That just shows in itself how c!Tommy’s desperation revolves around the revival book, and the potential to cause a lot of harm that c!Dream possesses with it. He was literally willing to be his abuser’s friend, just so that c!Dream wouldn’t use the revival book. Finally, c!Tommy resorted to having to kill c!Dream after that, as for him, it was the only option he could think of.

So, yeah. This is about c!Tommy’s perspective, what he sees from his point of view, and it is incredibly understandable, from the information he has, to perceive c!Dream as a threat. I’m not even talking about the morality of murder, whether it’s right or not. I’m talking about how c!Tommy is doing this out of what he believes to be a necessity in order to prevent further damage to everyone, rather than a punishment. Something that he stated word-for-word, numerous times, especially once when he was in a panicking state and was literally only speaking the truth in a moment of desperation. Hope this clears that up. :D

#c!dream #c!tommy #tw death #tw murder #tw trauma #not meaning to sound rude just giving clarification :-)#/rp

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thoughtfullyyoungduck · 3 years

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water rippling

A/N: I’m so sorry this took so long, please let me know what you think!

Summary: could you do a young losers x reader where the reader can’t swim but richie convinced her to come w them to the quarry bc he’ll teach her. but while he is pennywise comes underwater and tries to drown her so they have to save her

warnings: this whole chapter is basically about drowning and the fear of it so please don’t read it if that triggers you.

‘I’m not getting in.’

‘If you don’t get in than I can’t teach you anything either. Fuck, just get in already.’

‘I told you I didn’t want to go swimming Richie, this is all your stupid idea so at the very least be fucking patient with me’, you bite as you dip in foot into the water, then lift it up higher again so the water can’t reach you. The scowl on your face deepens.

You never understood why people swim as a hobby. You’d get why everyone has to learn how to swim - even if you didn’t and never learned-, but actually enjoying swimming? No, those people must be out of their minds.

Richie laughs, mocking you, but all in good fun. ‘Start with one step. Just until the water reaches your ancles. You can’t drown from that Y/N.’

‘I could trip and drown.’

‘Literally how? I’m right here, the losers are further up keeping an eye on us, and all you would have to do is stand up. It’s not deep here.’

You sigh, but know that ultimately, Richie has a point.

Most people don’t automatically back away from water as soon as they catch a glimpse of it, but people hadn’t had a trauma related to it either.

Swimming always reminds you of the day you nearly drowned. It was on vacation, in the same resort your parents took you every year, and then left you in the Mini club while they went off and had a relaxing day. The animators who were supposed to be watching you, spoke a language you, at that time, hadn’t been able to disaffirm, and that’s where an almost deadly mistake was made.

The leaders lured you away from the club house, and you, like every other little kid present, followed them along unfearingly. They were older, and you trusted that they would keep you safe. Until one of them picked you up near a pool, and threw you in without any warning.

At the time, you hadn’t been able to swim by yourself without help, and so the second your feet left solid ground, you panicked. It didn’t seem to matter how many times you tried to wave your arms for help, none of the animators were glancing your way.

You can’t figure out how you somehow managed to reach the edge of the pool, but you did, only to get thrown right back in after by the animator, who thought you were having the time of your live.

Of course, you didn’t blame them. It’s not like you could tell them you couldn’t swim, so they had no way of knowing that, but it still scared the life out of you. For the rest of the trip, and after, you refused to go anywhere near the water. Not even your parents trying to persuade you with promises of ice cream and candy if you were brave, made you take another change in the thing that nearly killed you.

You never tried to swim again, and that meant you had no knowledge of how to do it. It was embarrassing, to decline going to swim during P.E and being forced to explain why. Your peers often ridiculed you for it, and it made you feel like a losers for being such a coward.

But, cowardness is easy, especially when compared to facing your fears, and you never tried to learn how to swim, even after all the mockery. Only your new best friends hang out in the quarry all the time now, and you’re sick of being the one who has to watch from the shore as the others have fun.

Nothing bad has occurred to them in the water, -you’ve seen them go in about six times in three weeks now, and no one has come close to trouble - and Eddie, who is the most cautious person you’ve ever met, told you that statistically, there’s very little chance of you drowning. At your wits end, the only person you can think of asking for help, is Richie.

Richie might be an add choice, but he’s the only one who wouldn’t turn the lessons entirely boring and practical, like the others might. Richie jokes around a lot, brings humor into any situation, and you need that. You can’t get in your hard about the rippling water, or you’ll back out again.

‘Fine, I’ll go in, I’ll even sit down, but if I freak out and want to get out you’ll let me okay?’

‘Yeah I’m not gonna force you to stay. I’m not Eddie’s mom.’

Maybe you’ll be embarrassed by the motion later, but in the moment, you reach for Richie’s wrist, just to have some sort of support. Richie doesn’t mention it, just careful takes the same steps you do and lets you pick the pace at which you’re going.

It goes slow, but not at any point does Richie try to speed the process along. He does drop down in the water, on his ass, choosing a spot that just covers both of your torsos but is close to the shore.

You copy his every move, breathe deeply when you feel the water ripple around you and adjust to the new intrusion, until your closely packed to Richie’s side, in the water.

It takes a second to set in, that you’re sitting in the water and nothing is happening, but then you let out a breath of disbelief.

‘See, told you you could fucking do it. Repeat after me, you’re a woman who don’t need no man.’

‘You’ve been watching to many soap operas rich’, you tell him when you feel like you’re not on the verge of panicking anymore.

Inside the water, something pokes your leg, but you try to ignore it. You focus on breathing through the initial panic, remembering that nothing bad had happened to the losers despite being in the lake for a long time, and that pretty much ensures nothing would happen to you either.

‘Oh gross’, you utter as your try to force the slimy thing away from your feet. ‘You didn’t tell me there would be fish in here.’

Richie snorts, rolling his eyes as he grabs a handful of water and aims it at your face. He misses -Richie’s aim is always horrible whether you’re playing dodgeball or he’s trying to pass something on-, but he doesn’t care.

‘This is your fear Y/N/N, don’t try to scare me now. Besides, I’m not afraid of fish, Eddie’s mom vagina’s smells like a few died down there.’

You can’t focus on how disgustingly distasteful that joke is, because all you concentrate on is the slimy sensation, slowly sliding up your leg higher and higher.

‘Richie’, you beg, your voice reduced to that of a scared toddler. ‘Then what the fuck is touching me right now?’

A louder, slightly strained chuckle is produced by Richie, like he too is getting worried but is trying hard to convince himself everything is alright.

‘Stop fucking with me Y/N.’

Richie pushes the boundaries a lot, keeps going until somebody gets really annoyed and about ready to shut him up for a longer time, but the sincerity in his vox is so present that you’re instantly convinced he’s not messing around now.

‘I’m not fucking with you’, you raise your voice to a shrilled scream, so loud that the other losers, engaged in a game of chicken in the middle of quarry, also become aware of the situation. ‘Something is down there.’

It’s too late for them to help. The slimy blob, muddled by the water but visually a hand, tightens around your ancle, and snatches, hard.

Richie’s scrawny arms can’t resist against the strong haul, but he tries to hold on for as long as possible. His nails dig into your flesh, and the more you get pulled inside the water, the more marks his nails dig as you slide forward.

You shriek, arms flailing around now that the water is still too shallow for you to not be able to touch the bottom.

Plunges of water drip onto your face, both from your doing and Richie’s, and the others are advancing rapidly to come too your aid. Unfortunately nothing else can be done. Richie has no other options but to let you go, and the hand drags you to the middle of the lake.

Once you’re far enough away that you can’t touch the bottom with your feet anymore, the hand lets go, and you’re left to flounder on your own. Your legs slap around, trying with all your might to stay afloat and give the losers an opportunity to save you. A haunting chuckle breezes over the shell of your ear, and then the hand returns, satisfied with watching you struggle and panic for a while, but now ready to increase the terror.

You get one more chance to scream and suck in a handful of fresh air, and then your sinking down, under the surface.

The water douses your ears, muffles your ability to hear and see, and suffocates you with her insistence. You open your mouth, but it can’t produce a scream anymore, and you realize that you are completely as utterly doomed.

The hand has yet to free you, and it continues to pull you down. With each second that ticks by the fire in your chest spreads, and is unable to be ignored. After barely a few seconds, your movements turn sluggish, and you stop fighting against the hand. It’s at that time that it finally loosens his hold, but the fire has dilated up so much you can’t focus on anything other than the pain. Without ever learning how to swim, you wouldn’t be able to make it to shore anyway.

You read somewhere once that as soon as you swallow in water and it fills your lungs, you’ll die, and the pain will stop.

Your life plan hadn’t included dying this young in your life, but if you must go, you’d rather have it be quick. Losing the strength to hold out any longer, you open your mouth, and feel two separate pair of hands unclasps around your arms. The anxiety inside of you spikes, but you lack the energy to struggle against the grip, so you allow yourself to be guided. It’s not until your head breaks up from the water, and o2 greets you in plenty, that you see that the hands have brought you back up, instead of down.

You gasp, coughing up water, feeling as any minute you could pass out on the spot.

‘Jesus Y/N, stop struggling. We’re going to get you out.’

The two pairs of hands that saved you from drowning turn out to be Mike and Bill, and the float with you to the side of quarry where Eddie is gearing up to perform cpr if needed. If you had some breath back in your body, you would laugh at the sight.

Bev and Richie help drag you onto the dry rocks, away from the water, but still too close for your liking.

‘Get away’, you retches, crawling back in your arms. Eddie, who has been checking you over, tuts, but you don’t let it stop you.

‘It grabbed me. It fucking grabbed me. Get away from the water.’ You think you begin to cry, out of relief and alarm, but you can’t disentangle the water with your fluid.

‘There was nothing out there Y/N’, Ben tries to sooth, approaching you like a frightened animal. Eddie is less cautious, and stamps towards your with a frown on his face. He turns you on your side, his instruction not too brazen but still firm.

‘There was though guys. I swear on Eddie’s mom that something pulled her away.’

‘I saw it too,’ Eddie conforms, not looking away from your body, checking for any permanent damage.

‘Guys,’ Bev interject with a head shake. Her eyes gesture to you, shivering with wet clothes and crying hysterically. ‘Not now.’

‘Yeah. We’ll t-t-talk about it l-l-later.’

It’s Bev that gently ushers Eddie’s prodding hands away, as she opens her arms and awaits to see you reaction. You, once you pick up on what’s happening, accept gratefully, your tears subsiding only slightly once your wrapped up. The others join the cuddle pile soon enough, until there’s a shield of people protecting you and obstructing your view of the water.

‘Promise me we won’t ever go in there again. Not any of you. Please,’ you beg, afraid not solely for your life but for theirs as well.

‘Okay, okay Y/N. We promise.’

#My writing #the losers x reader #the losers club imagines #richie x reader #eddie x reader #stan x reader #bill x reader #mike hanlon x reader #ben hansom x reader #beverly march x reader #please let me know what you think #I could really use some uplifting words lol #richie tozier x reader

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thevoidcannotbefilled · 4 years

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Web!Martin.... Oh boy. Gonna shake the hornet’s nest with this one, but I’ve spent like three days on this editing and re-editing, and I’m finally satisfied with my kind of an essay at this point.

So, here’s a deep dive as to why I think Web!Martin has merits. (Scroll to the bottom of my essay for my TLDR).

Introduction

First, to get some stuff out of the way:

Do I think Martin is a sleeper agent? Do I think that he has been manipulating Jon this entire time or even in just season 5 for the games of the Web? Do I think he's a bunch of spiders in a Martin suit? Do I think he's regards the Mother as his Mother and accepts that he is her Son? Is Martn actively Webby?

No. Absolutely not. None of the above. The Martin we know is the Martin we began with, just with a bunch of trauma and has gained the ability to set his boundaries.

I find the idea of sleeper agent Martin or something similar to be very counterintuitive to the overall narrative. Not only is TMA about choices, and to have Martin be a sleeper agent would be to deny all of Martin's choices this season in particular, but it doesn't really lead to much. At best it's a gotcha and a surprise at worst it's making literally every interaction between Jon and Martin, with Martin himself, and so on mean nothing for the sake of one twist and make it sad. It's not fun in long term, and so at the end of the day, I trust Jonny and Alex as writers more than that. (Plus we already did the "person is replaced" thing).

Does Martin being a manipulator actively mean that he is a Web avatar?

Short answer, no.

Long answer, I made a post awhile back, and while it was for fandom things, I think it applies well here. What power you choose to align yourself with isn’t necessarily something you’d fully commit to. It is just, if you were an avatar and willing to hurt others for your own gain, what would you find yourself most aligned with. What I mean by that, just because Martin lies and manipulates doesn’t mean that he is Web, however, manipulation is a tool does fit well with the Web, and if he were to choose to align himself to that, I think he could be Webby. However, he is not necessarily a Web avatar because he has no motivation to hurt people.

That being said I do think Martin would be a good fit for the Web if he wanted to be, and I think there will be a point in the narrative that there is a potential that he could become one, even if he does not necessarily choose to be in the end.

Let’s talk about it.

Evidence

I think the best way to describe Web!Martin on my end is this: if Martin had an inclination to be an avatar, he would be the Web because everything from his aesthetics to his skillsets line up with the Web, but he does not have any reason to be Webby and in fact, at the very least as of MAG169, should actively be against the Web’s goals.

But that doesn’t mean his connection to the Web hasn’t been heavily foreshadowed or built up. Not all of these are of the same level, I admit that, so I’m just gonna bold the ones that are the most important. These aren’t in any particular order.

-For season 1 subtext, said he liked spiders In This First Appearance MAG22, in MAG38 Jon says that Martin gives them lectures on the importance of spiders for the environment, and MAG39, “it’s just that whatever web these statements have caught you in, well, I’m there too.”

-IN MAG79, his poem has a line in it that goes, “"the threads of people walking, living, loving" which is very Web-like.

-During the Web statement he read in season 3, he said “that wasn’t so bad, actually!” (MAG110) when he finished after showing open disdain for the others he read. The only other statement he didn’t think was bad to read was the Lonely one (MAG108), a power he canonical has ties to.

-The only person in the show so far of the main cast that has had direct contact with Annabelle Cane. The only other people that have had contact with her are her victims (Creature Feature, MAG110) or her people she used as tools (Web Development, MAG123).

-Let himself be guided to put the tapes on top of the coffin when the tapes, which have shown a direct association with both the Web and the Eye.

- Martin’s “lo-fi charm” and “retro-aesthetic” (various) versus Annabelle “She dressed like a vintage clothing store exploded on her” (MAG69)

-Uses lying and manipulation as his main tactic against people and is acknowledged that manipulation is a skillset of his. By Jonah mostly, but he was able to successfully manipulate both Peter and Jonah.

-In MAG117, he said "I’m not afraid for me, though. Isn’t that weird? I mean, it’s not like I’m going to be safe, like my plan’s not dangerous, but it’s, it’s mine. This last couple of years, I’ve always been running, always hiding, caught in someone else’s trap, but, but now it’s my trap, and, well, I think it’ll work. I know, I know it’s not exactly intricate, but it felt good weaving my own little web." and he then added after it with "oh good lord is Martin becoming some sort of spider person', no, Jon, just an expression.”

-Martin having a bad relationship with his mother versus Mother of Puppets.

-The Web and the Desolation actively dislike one another (MAG139), and fire is Martin’s most hated pain (MAG169).

-Martin is the primary investigator in Recluse (MAG59), Arachnophobia (MAG16), and was the one to find and give the Cracked Foundation (MAG114) to Jon. All of which are Web statements.

-The delivery of the table and the lighter were technically both given to Martin since he was the one who talked to Breekon and Hope.

-Martin was the first one to mention the Web lighter in season 5 in MAG162.

What Does This Mean

Now I will admit none of these things on their own mean Web!Martin. They’re something you might describe a Web!avatar yes, but not Martin on his own (like I said just because Martin can be a manipulator doesn’t mean he is a Web avatar).

In fact, with elements like Martin finding fire his least favorite pain, I adore the meta on Martin’s trauma about giving himself up for other people led to him disliking fire and the lack of care from his mother, also leading to that. It is an excellent metaphor that fits incredibly well with his character. That being said, these factors can coexist. Martin disliking fire can both be a metaphor for his own self-destruction for the sake of others and be hints toward Web!Martin.

HOWEVER, that all being said, even if these moments on their own don’t mean Web!Martin proof, I find it a bit unreasonable to entirely dismiss all of this either. There are too many coincidences lining up with the Web to not be intentional. It could be a red herring of course, but if it is a red herring.....well, Jonny put a hella of a lot of effort into making the Web!Martin red herring considering how much of his little details align so well with the small and big details of the Web.

But assuming that this info does align together in all its Webiness... does this mean Web!Martin?

Again, at the moment, I don’t think Martin is actively Webby.

At his heart, Martin wants to do two things: 1) Protect Jon and 2) Protect as many other innocents he can in the process.

As ironic as it is: "I want to find out what's going on. I want to save Jon. I want everyone to be fine and, you know what? If we were all happy that wouldn't actually be the end of the world” and “I want them to be safe. I need him to be okay” are basically the sum of Martin’s motivations from here to now. Martin wants a happy ending. And he’ll use whatever tools he can to do that.

So asking questions from dangerous people like Simon Fairchild? For the protection of the world from what he thought was from the Extinction.

Burning up statements and burning up the cabin? The Desolation would like that, if it wasn’t for the fact he does so to decrease the fear in the world.

And manipulating others? Peter? Jonah? Both of these weren’t to cause fear. They were at their heart to help others.

Using the tools that the powers use does not mean you’re of that power. Martin’s most effective tool is to manipulate others bc they underestimate him or they trust him to do what needs to be done. People tend to have a single view of him. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t have other tactics, but with both Peter and Elias, it’s clear he knows how to use others’ egos against them.

Season 5 and Web!Martin

This ALL being said...... Season 5 is a lot about the nature of power (what to do with it and what it means to use it) and what you can do in inherently toxic systems. We just learned that killing its leaders does nothing when the system itself is built to actively hurt others. That smiting doesn’t actively make things better. The Web is actively doing something at the moment and possibly with the Distortion as well that will probably hurt Jon and Martin.

But.....

I’m worried about the possibility that the Web can promise a world with a happy ending like Martin always wanted and with no other options within the world, Martin chooses to let himself become a tool for the Web. Now to make this clear: Does Web!Martin give a happy ending or even a better world? No. Absolutely not. Can the Web possibly promise to give him the power to get a happy ending? Depends on if Martin will believe it.

If Web!Martin is a thing, it would be in doing so What He Thinks would be in both of their best interests and most importantly as his lowest point and final resort. That he stops believing that they have power to change the world on their own. When he believes he has no power left and all he can do to make the world better is to go to the one source that always seems to understand what’s going on. Because as of yet, he doesn’t have the motivations to be a Web avatar, but we’re slowly creeping into territory where he might think it is necessary to be one.

(We already had best case scenario where the Web asks Martin to join him and Martin says no. He could say no again, of course, but I don’t know if the Web will be as understanding of his reluctance in time).

For me, Web!Martin is on the same level of tragedy as Jon being the Archivist. Yes, there would be choices, but Martin would have been actively been manipulated by the Web just as much as Jon would be hurt by the Eye, even if it’s for entirely different reasons. He would be used as a tool in a greater game. Jon wants to be a good person. Martin wants to have a happy ending. We already know Jon’s desire to help the people around him has gotten him multiple marks. I can definitely see a world where Martin’s desire for a happy ending is used against him by the Web.

I can see a world where Martin lies to Jon because he thinks that’s what’s best for the two of them. I can see a world where he doesn’t lie to Jon but still accepts the power of the Web anyway despite Jon not thinking it’s a good idea. I don’t think either HAVE happened yet. We aren’t at that point, but...

Whatever the case, whatever plan the Web may have it highly involves one Mister Blackwood and his Archivist. And for the Web’s plans, Martin plays a key part of in it.

Other Theories and How Web Martin Plays Into It

So, do I think that’s where the plot will end? With Web!Martin betraying Jon bc he thinks it will be best? Not really. I think a lot of the point will also be that while Martin fits the Web well, his inherent desire for a better world makes it so he’s not an avatar. It’s the same points I made before: aesthetically, Martin fits the Web well and could be a good avatar in association, but he doesn’t WANT to hurt innocents. And ultimately, no matter his potential goals, Martin loves and cares for the world and especially for Jon. There could be a mistake in there made by Martin, where the Web has his clutches in him, but I don’t see a world where that is his ultimate conclusion.

I’ve also seen a theory where Martin uses Webby shenanigans to his advantage against Annabelle Cane. Where the manipulator becomes the manipulated and the tragedy is the sacrifice of himself for the sake of a happy ending he’ll never see.

I’m interested in seeing if Jonah making Martin the backup Archivist goes anywhere, especially with the uncertain connection between the tapes, the Eye, the Web, and the Archivist. Does this have anything to do with why Martin felt like he had to listen to Jon? Does this have anything to do with how he slapped Jon out of a statement? Could both of these elements also have something to do with the Web?

I’m also very intrigued on what Web Development was doing when they have something called a “story-spinner” and yet when the story-spinner was described it sounded almost exactly like an Archivist, but instead when you give a story, the spinner killed someone. Could the story-spinner have anything to do with the previous back-up Archivist? Could they just be entirely separate things?

Who knows what it all means? I don’t. That’s why I’m not discounting anything, especially with something that has so much set-up and subtext as Web!Martin. Whether Web!Martin means full avatar or not isn’t clear to me, but I’m taking any and all potential red-tape moments and running with them. If it means being pulled by a red-herring, so be it, but I won’t dismiss anything until proven otherwise. As long as Martin wants to do good and have a happy ending, I don’t think the Web can fully get him at least not in the ways that count. But I won’t stop investigating the narrative on what these elements could lead up to.

Conclusion

This post was made in frustration. I admit that. There is a distaste for Web!Martin that has been approaching the fandom that I don’t entirely understand. I’m not saying you have to like it, heck I admit, I could be entirely wrong. I also agree it’s a bit annoying that every interaction that Martin and Jon have come up under scrutiny for Martin potentially being Webby by the fandom. That’s why I started this post as I did because I don’t find the narrative of “Martin Is The Evil Bad Guy Manipulating Jon From The Beginning” all that compelling and wanted to put that to rest early.

I do, though, find it frustrating dismissing all elements of Web!Martin because of this. At the end of the day, I find there are too many elements in the text to entirely dismiss it and an outright rejection of Web!Martin can potentially lead to dissatisfaction with the narrative. I make this post as an explanation and exploration of my thoughts, and a way to show why so many fans like the Web!Martin theory. Take it or leave it, it’s fine, but I wanted to gather all my thoughts clearly in one place rather than in a bunch of snippy posts. I hope I’ve done that well enough.

TLDR: Web!Martin for me is a potential, a threat, and a possibility, but not something I think is actively happening at the moment. Martin would make a good fit for an avatar if he wanted to be, but at the moment, has no motivation to do so. However, with the ever decreasing options to save the end of the world, I can see a situation where Web!Martin is a thing that he actively thinks could save it.

That being said, Martin is inherently a character that wants to do GOOD in the world, and as long as that’s the case, even if that motivation is used against him, I don’t think he will be proven wrong that the world can be good and he has the power to make it so, or at the very least, I don’t think his journey will end on a dower note, even if it is a tragic one. The tragedy will be in the cost of saving the world or something similar, and whether or not Web!Martin is the case, I don’t think that will change. That being said, there are many potential theories on what could happen, and I don’t want to miss any of them, Web or not. This post has been made in somewhat defense as to why people like Web!Martin and continue to theorize about it, but also in reassurance that even if we do get Web!Martin that it doesn’t mean a destruction of Martin’s character.

#tma #the magnus archives #tma meta #web!martin #tma spoilers #tma s5 #I made an essay but needed to put my thoughts together #long post #ALSO THANK YOU GAMMI AND CHIN FOR YOUR HELP WITH THIS!!!#edit: my read more died when I edited on mobile gdi sorry

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cardinaldaughter · 3 years

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Okay so I got a reply to my most recent post about Essek but my response is too long to fit in a reply there, so I’m making a new post because it’s 4:30 am and I have insomnia and I am over people’a bullshit.

The response was this: “When they last saw Essek he didn't want to take responsibility for his actions and wanted to continue reaping the fruits of his crime. That probably didn't do much to endear to the M9 and they had things to do. It's not the M9's job to babysit Essek. Caleb was pretty much forced to stay with the Nein for lack of better options. Essek doesn't have that problem, redemption needs to be in his own hands”

So okay. Let’s address this.

Fine, sure. They can’t babysit Essek. That’s fair. But I take issue with “Caleb was pretty much forced to stay with them” because, no he wasn’t. In fact Liam has said multiple times that CLeb was ready to run at any moment and wanted to a few times. Only reason he didn’t? Liam would have to make a new character. So, Caleb stayed. No one forced Caleb to stay, nor Liam to keep him around.

As for Essek not wanting to “take responsibility”. Essek helped negotiate the peace talks. He didn’t want to be turned in for his crimes, but he actively helped end the war alongside the Mighty Nein. Did he still do bad things? Yep. Not gonna deny that. They were pretty shady.

But if we’re gonna talk about “taking responsibility” for bullshit, then let’s fucking talk.

Beau is an established criminal and within the first couple episodes committed mail fraud, which is played for laughs.

Jester is only in this campaign because, after humiliating a paying customer of her mother’s, rather than take responsibility for her actions, ran away from home. Yes, Sharpe’s demands for her punishment were unreasonable, but she still avoided taking any responsibility and had to disguise herself for a while when going home so as not to be caught.

Plus, the Nein do the exact same thing to that same man later on, playing it for laughs, for no reason other than they can.

Not to mention, they spend hours in some of the most boring and frustrating parts of the entire campaign, figuring out some stupid elaborate scheme for Artagan- who begs Jester to lie for him rather than Take Responsibility for his deceit. She could have said “hey the traveler lied I was deceived too he’s not a god sorry everyone” but no they invoke another god and lie to everyone at traveler con and when the moonweaver sends a messenger to teach artagan a lesson, rather than let him face some consequence, jester pleads for him to be spared, thus allowing him to basically learn nothing.

They were cruel to Celia, for no other reason than she was a bit snooty and conceited.

Caleb is a fucking murderer and yes he has extreme trauma and has suffered unjustly at the hands of his abusers but he also committed murder and i know he is Very Sorry and full of regret but if we wanna talk about Taking Responsibility, the best thing he could do is turn himself in and go to prison for it.

Oh and never mind the fact that the empire kids and Veth committed treason against the empire by handing the beacon over to the enemy of the state. Which Caleb only did as a last resort to avoid going to prison for them killing dynasty scouts. Like, the empire sucks but treason is still treason. They were at war. The authorities in the empire wanted the beacon. They gave it to the “enemy”. I don’t see anyone offering to own up to that.

Remember when they stole a boat and changed the name of it and lied to the dock master guy to keep from getting in trouble?

Remember when a member of the assembly was murdered on their watch and rather than report it to the authorities and let them handle it they stole the corpse, put it in the bag of holding, and dragged it along with them? (Yes bigger things are going on and “proper authorities” would be unequipped to handle the Truth of it all, but this is about Taking Responsibility, and not reporting the murder of a high ranking government official is pretty irresponsible.)

Yasha killed members of the colbalt soul, and yeah she was mind controlled and that’s awful and tragic, but people are still dead by her hands.

They ignore the fact that the gentleman is tied, either directly or indirectly, to trafficking, bc it’s more fun to joke about parent-trapping him and Marion than stopping whatever illegal activities he’s doing.

Nott-and I cannot stress this enough- knowing full well how devastating the war was on people, including her own family, was willing to Let. The. War. Continue. to break her curse.

None of the above truly bother me. It’s D&D. It’s supposed to be ridiculous and fantastical and fun and removed somewhat from reality. I don’t care about any of the Nein’s crimes. But if they are going to hold Essek to some unreasonably high moral standard while ignoring their own moral failings, then I’m going to call bullshit on them, and bullshit on the people saying he needs to Take Responsibility when the same can be said for nearly all of them. I don’t care how much they’ve changed or grown or felt remorse. If the issue here is a lack of Taking Responsibility for shitty actions, then the Nein have absolutely no room to judge anyone.

#critical role #critical role spoilers #this is only what I could think of off the top of my head #and listen I cannot stress enough that I don’t actually care about the crimes the Nein have committed #as Liam famously said #it’s a game #so I’m not going to take it super seriously #but i can’t help but be mildly annoyed that people seem so intent on hating a character #when he isn’t anywhere near the worst person they’ve encountered #he has shown remorse #and regret #and that seems to be enough to appease the Nein with each other #but the standards for others are much greater #and that is so hypocritical #like it’s great from a character standpoint bc a lot of the campaign deals in shades of grey and nuance #but then you have this blatantly black-and-white mindset against this one specific dude #who admitted to your face and when he didn’t know you were there #that he felt remorse #but bc he doesn’t want to die for treason #he’s unforgiveable?#talk about a double standard #plus the wild mother said he would help!#she said he can be trusted!#(at least for now bc cad did specify ‘for now’)#and if Essek ever does betray them I’ll eat my words happily #but until then I say this extra harsh demand for Essek to pay for his crimes is hypocritical and ridiculous

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batricide · 3 years

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i’ll drop this on my blog here too actually bc it’s Important to how i play damian and also let me yell about the fact that ij’s bruce is not a good person and the reason why so many people hate damian is because they somehow miss that.

so! here’s a warning for: tyrannical totalitarian regimes, child abuse, abusive fathers, emotional manipulation, evil superman, character death & also random he-man. please note that this is about injustice and its characters, which are not a reflection on their mainstream counterparts or how i view them.

there’s tension between damian and bruce from the get-go in injustice, and we’re never really told why. if we take cues from the game (though that entire scene doesn’t make sense) then it’s because bruce didn’t save jason, which fits in with my reordered robin theory in which tim and jason were switched, and jason has only recently died.

now, we don’t know whether jason is running around as red hood right now or not. but i’m inclined to say he isn’t, as his injustice 2 ending makes a big deal of him becoming red hood. and damian is close with jason in injustice 2, close enough that jason listens when damian tells him that he’s a lot more than bruce thinks he is and drops the shitty batman costume. close enough that during the (extremely weird, extremely out of alignment with the comic) scene in injustice 2 where damian betrays bruce for clark, jason is the name damian throws at him with the most vehemence. regardless of the robin ordeer, bruce’s failure to save jason is seems to be an incredibly sore point between them.

so it’s interesting that bruce is already counting damian out before injustice even starts. he’s comparing damian to jason - someone who he apparently no longer considers part of his legacy.

the kicker is: damian in injustice is actually probably the most morally centered version of himself. he shows open compassion and care for other people more often than he does in most of the mainstream runs. damian’s sense of right and wrong is solid, but what he wants is to break the cycle that gotham is trapped in. which from his perspective, is something bruce doesn’t seem to want to do.

injustice’s version of bruce is someone who truly believes that the ends justify the means - which means he’s apt to do some heinous things to people until they see his side of things. he seems to view people questioning as an act of betrayal, so instead of ever explaining himself he resorts to things like installing viruses in cyborg, kidnapping hawkgirl and replacing her, beating allies within an inch of their life - all of it is fine to him so long as they’re not dead.

but it’s not fine to damian. damian is constantly horrified at the lengths bruce will go to.

damian is afraid of his father.

so, this is about a specific scene. let’s get to that scene. its just important to note the difference between them, and emphasize that he’s not going with any intent to fight. if he was going to do that, he wouldn’t be doing this:

or respond like this:

or this:

he’s there to make amends, or at least try to. he still loves his father and he wants to be forgiven, and this is something that will carry on ten years later in injustice 2. damian made the choice to oppose bruce’s controlling nature but damian didn’t choose to abandon him and the bat family permanently. that choice was made for him. damian wants to come home.

and he’s terrified of his father. i cannot stress that enough. bruce at this point has already shown that he knows how to hurt his closest friends if they oppose him.

damian is a highly trained fighter, but he’s also a thirteen year old boy who knows he can’t overpower a man twice his size and weight.

and bruce?

bruce’s entire argument really hinges on ‘you, my thirteen year old son, didn’t take my side in this argument’. because, i have to put this in bold, the league was not executing the criminals they were removing from arkham. they were just transferring them to a more secure facility. something which is actually sorely needed, especially given what has just happened to metropolis. arkham isn’t fit to house them. and as far as damian sees it, bruce doesn’t like it because it’s removing an element of his control.

now, bruce isn’t wrong about how things will escalate.

but damian’s not wrong about his motivation here. i think there’s a conversation to be had about how bruce’s methods in trying to stop the regime actually drove it to further and further extremes. bruce never tries to talk to clark - or anyone, really. he just starts playing mind games to make them do what he wants.

it harkens back to the conversation bruce and dick have in the batplane. that bruce doesn’t talk to people, he doesn’t explain himself. he’s either right or you’re wrong and he won’t explain his stance. there is never room for debate. he’ll just stop talking and leave until you agree. there is no option where he sits and listens to an open and honest dialogue, no scenario where he entertains that he might be in the wrong or maybe things aren’t black and white.

and that’s why injustice bruce is not a good guy.

even on prime earth, damian had to bend over backwards to prove to bruce that he wasn’t a monster. it was damian who spent months digging through the sewers for martha’s pearls. damian who had to prove he was capable of loving titus. damian who constantly had to show that he was capable of empathy and thinking of others - bruce did none of the heavy lifting in that father-son relationship, he made damian climb the entire hill and still continues to put little effort into it.

and injustice bruce is even less empathetic and expressive than prime bruce.

which is why you get a confrontation like this:

this goes beyond dick’s accident and ties back into what clark said about bruce not tending to his son’s who are grieving because they lost friends in metropolis. damian’s fed up with never meeting bruce’s expectations. but more than that, he’s fed up with his feelings coming second to bruce’s.

bruce has already made a judgement on who and what damian is. damian has the potential to be dangerous and requires work to fix, and so he’s not interested in getting to know him beyond that. he tells dick that he’s “worried about damian being seduced by darkness” but never talks to damian himself with him about it.

but clark has looked at damian and and decided that damian is good. damian has problems, clark can admit that and does, but damian is good. like bruce himself.

and ultimately why when dick dies, clark is the one that reaches out to him because he sees damian for what he is: grieving child who just made a terrible mistake. it was an accident. damian didn’t mean for this to happen. meanwhile, bruce feels as though he was proven right. damian was dangerous and now his real son is dead. bruce will later admit, once he stops trying to manipulate damian, that damian was dead to him the moment dick died.

going back to year zero for a minute, they subtly show that damian is doing his best to be like bruce. baby damian idolizes his father. so i imagine a lot of bruce’s own feelings towards damian stem from self-hatred. from bruce seeing himself in his son and not liking the reflection it forces him to confront. injustice bruce projects a great deal of his own insecurities and shortcomings onto his youngest. damian is his worst what-if.

even though damian doesn’t deal with his grief the way bruce does. there are similarities, he puts his feelings into his fists and hits. just like bruce. but unlike bruce, and most likely because of dick, he does try to communicate. come injustice 2 he even talks about his feelings.

that doesn’t justify any of the violent outbursts. and he has a lot of them. he has significant issues with controlling his anger and struggles with lashing out, verbally and physically. it both worsens and improves as he gets older.

damian knows that he’s more than his grief, his loss, his anger. he’s also compassionate and capable of incredible feats of kindness. we see that in the flashback chapter in injustice 2. people aren’t pawns for damian, they aren’t a means to assuage his own guilt and validate himself as a good person. he wants to be good for those people.

damian’s relationship with heroism isn’t built on an intrinsic need for control or power, nor is it a means of validating his self worth.

people just need him. they’re suffering. and he wants to be there for them.

but again, we’re not there yet.

so, alfred reaches out to touch damian. damian asks him repeatedly to let go. when alfred doesn’t, damian tries throwing him off, not realizing how much strength he now possesses.

damian has a thing about being touched when he’s wound up tightly. it almost always ends with him lashing out at someone. which, tying back into why he felt comfortable coming back here, probably goes into his expectation that he’s going to get the lights knocked out of him. because again, damian did not go to the cave to fight or hurt anyone. the pill is entirely for his own defense.

from what we know of damian’s childhood in both prime and injustice, violence is the expected retaliation for misbehavior. toeing out of line is grounds for getting the shit beaten out of you, and while things should be different here....

from how bruce reacts he’s not wrong to expect it. note that bruce dodesn’t run to alfred to see if he’s okay, he goes after damian for hurting him. it’s damian who runs to alfred after he’s thrown bruce away from him.

( granted, yes, he threw bruce into the penny and it almost crushes alfred )

damian apologizes and he means it. alfred’s first question is to ask for bruce.

“”hawkgirl”” intervenes to try to end this fight before it can escalate further.

damian deduces that this isn’t hawkgirl and blows some stuff up. bruce calls after him probably - not to have a serious heart to heart with him about what just happened, or what happened in arkham, but to try to manipulate him into taking bruce’s side or in the very least stop his ruse from being uncovered.

this is a theme moving forward. bruce will dangle forgiveness in front of damian, but only when it benefits him and can be used to control him. eventually he’ll stop and will use the guilt he knows damian feels to wound him.

and here’s the second theme it introduces: damian is scared shitless of his father. he’s not afraid of bruce’s violence, as after this he charges straight for him time and time again, but he is utterly terrified of the lengths bruce will go to get his way.

this is also where he takes dick’s suit. i think this was his way of telling bruce that he didn’t deserve to use dick’s memory the way he uses his parent’s death - as justification for what he does. this comes up in injustice 2 later down the road, damian will bring up that bruce uses his pain to justify how he brutalizes the people around him. damian does the same thing -- but we also see damian grappling with his conscience about it. he wants to be better. he doesn’t want to be all his violence and loss.

back to the topic at hand, damian doesn’t do anything with dick’s suit. unlike bruce, damian doesn’t wear his grief and guilt in plain sight. he puts it in a box and doesn’t look at it, he covers the wounds with anger and as he gets older, develops a death wish and basically begins seeking a noble death in order to make up for what he’s done. it isn’t until dick passes the mantle to him in an attempt to steer him back on the right path that he even looks at it again.

damian isn’t the one that ended his relationship with bruce. bruce did. damian is very willing to reconcile if bruce genuinely wants it, but bruce doesn’t bother with damian outside of combat or when he needs something. damian actually keeps up visits with alfred, he gets him birthday presents, they meet up often and despite their opposing viewpoints, they get along just fine. damian even listens to what alfred says. he still loves his family.

damian himself is a mess. this line resonates because damian, too, is afraid. afraid of bruce, afraid of being what bruce thinks he is. there’s only so far he can bury it under the anger.

by the next issue of year one, after the confrontation at the manor, damian’s discarded any notion that bruce is a good person or justified in anything he does. everything he says on this page is true.

he’s not wrong. he’s more than bruce has even given him credit for being. injustice bruce sorts people into boxes impossible to climb out. damian made his attempt at reconciliation and instead, found out that bruce has kidnapped and replaced one of his friends to spy on all the rest. in that split second when bruce came at at him, he saw the disgust and anger in his eyes. he’s seen how bruce sees him and wholeheartedly rejects it.

he doesn’t want to be bruce. he will not be bruce.

batman was supposed to be better than the league. it was supposed to be a new way. instead he just found a new, different means to brutalize and control, and a new way someone justifies causing harm. and he doesn’t want it.

this isn’t to say that damian is a saint. he’s a very flawed, very broken person. he went from one abusive parental situation, to another, to another, and has the damage to show for it. he’s got bad habits from all of them, many of which he isn’t aware of or doesn’t think are a problem.

but unlike his two dads, damian doesn’t close himself off to what he’s feeling completely, nor does he decide to rush towards external solutions for his pain. he’s, again, very aware that something is wrong. he doesn’t hold to his convictions the same way bruce or clark do, he questions. he’s deeply unhappy with who he is and what he’s doing.

but damian is seeking answers using a very limited toolset, and there’s a very limited pool of people he can ask that won’t give him a biased answer or try to manipulate him for their own means. one of the people he confides in does just that.

the other gives him the honest truth.

his relationship with selina is fraught and she’s often one of the very nastiest people towards him, but it’s because of that he ends up opening up to her. she isn’t going to bullshit him and just say what he wants to hear.

and this is what makes damian different from them. both of them.

because he stops, because he questions, he’s still connected to reality. to his own humanity.

injustice’s bruce is a bruce that has quietly let his humanity die. he’s completely given over to the cold logic of batman and the idea that whatever he does to the people around him, no matter how morally dubious, is justified so long as it means protecting lives. he might not kill, but he really stops just short of that. he just doubles down on his beliefs and takes anyone who doesn’t agree with him as a traitor. he will go out of his way to rationalize how a largely guilty person is innocent (harleen) and how a largely innocent person is guilty (damian). and so he uses damian’s “betrayal” - ie, damian standing with clark instead of him - as justification for icing him out. that way he can ignore all the people who have reminded him time and time again that it was an accident.

bruce also can’t stand that damian won’t do what he says. bruce will ignore damian unless it benefits him. bruce will go on to frequently weaponize how badly damian wants forgiveness against him. there are multiple instances where he says “just do as i say and i’ll forgive you, son.”

and then in the next breath, he’ll tell damian that he “can’t forgive the deaths”, all the while he has harleen as his new sidekick. it’s fine that harleen helped with the scheme to blow up metropolis, killed jimmy olsen, and countless others. it’s not fine that damian did something he did all the time to dick - something dick himself shrugged off, because the expectation for this behavior was that dick would catch the baton - and it ended in tragedy.

because harleen listens to him and damian doesn’t. bruce cuts damian neatly out of his life and only really cares about him again when he’s a corpse.

damian, meanwhile, never stops trying to earn bruce’s forgiveness. in the canonical bad end (or well a comic offshoot of the canon ending) damian essentially dies begging bruce to forgive him, admitting that he always cared. he launches an absolutely insane rescue mission to save his father from clark’s torture and it costs him his life.

( but it’s worth mentioning - it takes damian showing bruce an image of kara for bruce to acknowledge him. )

even before this, damian was looking out for bruce in other ways. he was the reason selina got involved with the regime. because he offered her the chance to join and save bruce. damian’s anger towards bruce is less that he wants him dead, and more that bruce won’t stop unless he’s killed.

and damian is willing to kill him if bruce poses a threat to his ‘new’ family. he’s not going to watch bruce hurt the people he loves.

but his new father sucks just as much as his old one.

talia and bruce were more obviously abusive parents. they were controlling and sometimes asserted that control and obedience using physical violence and intimidation. in obvious ways you can point to and see abuse.

damian doesn’t recognize clark is using him until he sees clark discard kara, who should be everything to clark and is someone important to damian. before that, he has inklings that they’ve gone too far, but clark has been such a paragon of good that when he tells damian not to worry about it, he doesn’t. he hides all his darkness behind that smile and tells damian he’s good and worthy of people loving him, that they’re saving people and they won’t let another metropolis happen. clark talks to him and still (seems to) accept him even when they disagree.

damian misses clark’s equally as abusive tendencies because they hidden under the guise of a fatherly concern.

clark is manipulating him into divulging more than he wants to. a boundary damian set is being broken without damian even realizing it. damian’s uneasy. his body language goes from very easy and relaxed to overtly uncomfortable and almost submissive. it’s also very subtle but clark actually rises higher off the ground to intimidate and loom over him.

damian, who has only known bruce’s stormy silences in moments of disagreement, doesn’t recognize this for what it is. clark doesn’t take the slight out on him. clark doesn’t stop talking to him because he dared to question.

instead, he loops an arm around damian and praises him, rewards him for being honest and makes it seem like this is an open dialogue and not an interrogation. which it is. i wouldn’t call it gaslighting, but i would call it lovebombing. damian doesn’t realize that there was anything off about the encounter, or if he does, he’ll tell himself he’s just being paranoid.

after all. this ended amicably, not with him standing alone wondering what he did wrong, or being thrown across the room. clark basically stops just shy of ruffling his hair and calling him sport.

he was rewarded for honesty. and so any discomfort he felt was imagined.

i think a thing that a lot of fans miss is that injustice’s damian is a forthright person. he doesn’t lie or deceive much, and later on it will bother him that he’s keeping secrets from kara for ‘the greater good’. he loathes that bruce does it and works hard to not fall into that trap. he wants to be honest. he’s glad when he’s rewarded for that honesty.

because injustice’s damian doesn’t want to be batman. he wants to be superman. he wants to be good.

but injustice’s superman is not a good man.

clark keep secrets, many terrible secrets, and often hurts people and justifies it to himself. he just hides it far better than bruce does. clark is even more controlling and cruel, but he leans harder into his humanity and emotions to hide it. it’s easier to see bruce being cold and calculating and miss the way clark subtly uses what you want to get what he wants out of you. and you never really see it coming when he lashes out. he’ll apologize for it, of course, and if you’re not dead you’ll forgive him, because it’s clark. he didn’t mean it. right?

bruce manipulates overtly and grandly using intimidation, clark manipulates subtly using emotion. damian only recognizes one of these things when they happen.

so clark gives damian what he wants - a parent who loves him, someone he can talk to and even show a little vulnerability with - and then uses that against him.

the worst thing - the very worst thing - is that bruce and clark love damian. he knows this. both seem to genuinely consider him their son. and he knows this.

in injustice vs motu, bruce snaps fully into awareness just as diana snaps damian’s neck. he’s awake just in time to watch his son die. and when clark is brought onto the scene, clark falls to his knees and mourns damian and laments his role in driving him to this.

but they weaponize this parent-child bond he wants against him and each other. frankly, neither of them were very interested in him for who he was. nor for helping him be better and master his anger. damian’s body isn’t even cold before bruce uses it against clark, failing to acknowledge his own part in damian’s all too early demise.

he’s another chess piece on their board. one clark can use to wound bruce. one bruce can use to wound clark.

the person damian is when away from both of their influence is a more complete damian. he’s the very best of both of them.

the damian here is still curt and sometimes rude, but he laughs and bonds with the people around him. he values people’s freedom and seems to strive for honesty and communication. meaning no one is in his war to reclaim the world doesn’t want to be, and he makes no move without everyone knowing.

when he recruits adam, he tells them their story and what they’ve gone through and gives adam the choice to join them or stay in eternia.

anyway, all of this is to say that even all these years later, i continue to be so sad about injustice damian wayne.

edit:

now, there’s actually one other thing i want to bring up because i totally forgot about it.

so. issue 8 of injustice 2.

if we’re going with the idea of the reordered robin theory, which is what makes the most sense to me considering jason’s age and the friction between bruce and damian, this before jason dies. and if i’m wrong and the robins don’t have a different order, then this is before some enormous event that broke the slowly building trust.

there’s none of the undercurrent of hostility and distrust that shows up in year 0, which is immediately before year 1. we’re not given a timeframe for when this occurs, either, it’s just happier times.

but what’s really hard to ignore is that the dynamic between bruce and damian is completely different here. maybe tom taylor’s just settled more into writing the two of them, but i don’t think so. year zero comes after this.

he even acknowledges damian’s anger earlier in the chapter. but it’s less of a condemnation of his character and more a concern that he might not be ready to be on his own. alfred is the one advocating for caution, asking if he’s ready, bruce is the one saying yes, he is.

it’s a complete reversal.

and his trust is rewarded with a night of damian abandoning the “”mission”” he was given (get home from the furthest point of gotham in three hours) to help everyone along the way. which was the real goal all along, it was a test to see if damian’s compassion would win out over his want to win. and it does. bruce is proud of him.

so... what happened between them? what caused that shift?

i’m kind of worried we’re never going to know. like, i’m so glad that tom taylor is dc’s new golden boy and they’re just letting him build a million different aus. i buy every book he writes.

but also i’m dying because IJ2 was clearly planned to go on a lot longer than it did and i have questions that i know netherrealm doesn’t care about answering.

#ooc.#tl;dr dick grayson raised a good boy who needed support at a critical time and instead was taken in by cruel god wearing a kind smile #and damian doesn't realize it until it's far too late and he's done so much he can't take back

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geezsims · 4 years

Photo

Doctor Amber Gonzalez — interview for @toxoplasmajuice’s Atkins’ MMBC!

1. Tell me a little about yourself. Y'know, name, pronouns, age, where you’re from, anything else you might say if I asked you, “Who are you?”

I’m Amber. Well, I should say Amber Gonzalez, or Dr. Gonzalez if you want to be formal. I’m hoping you won’t be for too long... [chuckles drily] It’s hardly the time for formalities, wouldn’t you agree? I feel similarly about pronouns, if you must know—a tedious necessity while we remain shackled by language as it is now. [another chuckle] TL;DR: you’re welcome to use whatever pronouns take your fancy, though I tend to default to ‘they/them’ for the sake of ease. I’m 21 years, three months, and sixteen days old.

As for who I am... I am an acolyte of science. Always pushing the boundaries of what can be accomplished through the power of the mind. [momentary pause] I’m not sure there’s much to know about me beyond that.

2. Before the world ended, did you have any long-term goals? Where would you picture yourself in the future if the future didn’t crumble in front of our eyes?

There were countless projects amongst which I was dividing my time. The memory’s a bit... blurry around the edges, but I’m pretty sure my primary focus at the time would have been cloning. Or was it robotics? [shakes head] No matter. Many of my resources have gone kaput in the aftermath, but that isn’t going to stop me from dedicating myself to other scientific endeavours. Even if I have to resort to... [shudders] anthropology.

3. Any talents or skills? What about hobbies?

My skills are mostly restricted to science and research, though I’ve been known to dabble in the occult when the mood takes me. Alchemy especially is a dear hobby of mine, and one that doesn’t require anywhere near the amount of power demanded by my large-scale experiments.

Mh... after giving it some thought, I should also add that I have another hobby. One that doesn’t slot quite as neatly into my pioneering lifestyle, but that may be of interest to Clyde. It may also shed some light as to why I’m here, ah... [coughs] Let’s just say that some of my bags coming here are weighed heavy with hurriedly salvaged romance novellas. For reasons I cannot rationally explain I simply can’t get enough of those formulaic love stories!

4. If you feel like sharing, what was your love life like before this? Totally fine if you don’t wanna talk about it.

[another cough] If you must know... apart from the aforementioned literature things have been pretty quiet on the romance front for me. I’ve just never found the time for anything more serious than the occasional fling with a spicy lab assistant.

5. Besides the sanctuary part, what made you sign up for this BC?

I, ah, would like to meet Clyde. Very much, in fact. But I won’t pretend that some safety and security to get back on track with my experimentation doesn’t hold a certain appeal. Given the circumstances, I’m sure most if not all the contestants are going to be bringing some sort of ulterior motive to the table.

6. Okay, okay, hot take: this question is fucking stupid. First of all, MMBCs have happened even with this question, so it’s not even protecting anybody. Second, if we really needed this information–or if the network did–there’s better ways to do background checks. You can just lie here. You can literally just lie.[*] Third, it’s just so vague. Sure, if you’ve got some degree of murder on your record, maybe that would be important, but–what, being caught with a gram of weed in the summer of ‘15 is supposed to tell me you might be a murderer? And, most importantly, it blatantly contributes to the stigma against felons. Non-violent criminals, people who’ve changed for the better, people who were falsely accused–we’re basically saying all of them might as well be murderers. And I’m not for that. But the program we’re doing this through is requiring that I ask, so, whatever: do you have a criminal record?

Not that I know of. I seem to remember some former test subjects, ah... holding a bit of a grudge, but I don’t recall any charges. As I’ve mentioned previously, my memory is not the best, but I doubt I would forget something as grave as that.

7. Anyway. Random fact about you?

Hmm... how about this: due to a past experiment, there is always a slight current of electricity about my person. My hair often crackles and stands on end depending on what sort of floor I’m standing on. Oh, and I’ve taken to wearing these gloves most of the time to avoid giving people nasty electric shocks when they come into contact with me.

8. Is there anything important I should know about you? Health-related stuff, ancient curses following you, that sort of thing?

Barring my spotty memory, my body and mind are pretty robust. There are some other side-effects from my experimentation which surface from time to time—glowing eyes, erratic sleep schedule, energy bursts followed by severe lethargy...—but nothing so serious as an ancient curse. Apart from my own hubris, which is scheduled to catch up with me any day now. [laughs] That was a joke.

9. Is there anything or anyone you had to leave behind to come here? (This one’s optional, too.)

Ah, no. No one. [drily] Just the proverbial smoking ruins of my life’s work and a dozen or so lab rats.

10. What’s the first thing you’re gonna do when things calm down and we can leave the BC house again?

It all depends on the state of the world then. I’m a highly adaptive person. If my abilities are required in the aftermath, I’ll provide as best I can, but I’d be equally happy to seal myself away hermetically at the first chance and simply get back to work. There is so much left to be discovered!

OOC questions:

1. May I draw your Sim? (No one’s ever said no to this, but it never hurts to ask, right?)

Of course!

2. Do you have any tips for writing your Sim that you feel the interview and/or your intro post don’t already give me?

She’s often sarcastic and prone to long tangents. And she alternates between quite formal speech and casual informal, bordering on the over-familiar when presented with strangers. Just quite chaotic in general. I can see her not getting along with everybody as she can be pretty wrapped up in her own shit at times, which can come off as self-absorbed, but she also won’t ever judge a book by its cover.

As for the clone thing—she isn’t one, as far as I’m concerned, but due to her excessive experimentation she sometimes worries she can’t prove to herself or others that she isn’t. It keeps her up at night sometimes.

3. I want to start decorating contestants’ rooms this time around. Do you have any pointers as to decorating your Sim’s room? General themes are fine, and if you have any specific objects you want me to put in your Sim’s room (EA content or CC), that’d be great.

Aw, that’s a cute idea! Really just any odd gadgets and doodads, maybe the robot stuff that came with Ambitions (I think? It’s been a while, lol!) rather than the overly fancy/modern stuff from ITF. I’m picturing kind of Spartan sleeping arrangements, metal flooring and/or walls, maybe those biohazard posters (no idea where they were from, sorry). Don’t worry if you can’t find any of those things, that’s just kind of the general vibe I’m imagining. Her favourite colours are bright orange, grey, teal-ish blue and neon green, if that’s useful at all :v

4. Will you generally be around for random questions I have regarding your Sim? I might need random bits of information from everyone from time to time… for reasons. :)

If not here, then on Twitter for sure!

#bc contestants #toxoplasmajuice #amber gonzalez #team amber #sims 3 #the sims 3 #ts3

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krisseycrystal · 4 years

Text

rated: g

fandom: Steven Universe

prompt: “Competition” + BisPearl (& Steven)

requested by: @moominquartz (& myself)

SO I’M PRETTY SURE when my darling husband, Isaiah, first said “I can’t decide to request BisPearl w/ Competition or Protecting Someone You Love” I said “both” but then SUF ended and I cried my eyes out and got slammed with feelings to explore Steven’s adventures post-show, out on his own, while still connecting with the gems who love him

maybe just bc under this past year i, too, moved out for good across the country from my family and i want to see him enjoying it

so now have this lengthy oneshot. enjoy!!

- o - o - o -

Put it There [Read on AO3]

- o - o - o -

Give me your hand, I’d like to shake it, I wanna show you I’m your friend You’ll understand if I can make it clear, It’s all that matters in the end

- o - o - o -

Steven is in some tiny nowhere town in the snow-capped mountains of Wyobrado when Pearl comes to visit. Unlike Amethyst, Pearl doesn’t have a bag in her hand when she arrives. She warps in to the nearest pad with the clothes on her back and a bright smile on her face and as soon as she sees him, she extends her hands and trills, “Oh, Steven!” and Steven lets her run to him, laughing as they crash into each other.

The air is full of, “So how’ve you been?” and “I’m so happy to see you again,” and “I saw the pictures you sent! You look like you’re taking to skiing much better than roller-skating!” and “Oh! Is that what it looks like?”

They talk for the entire drive down the mountainside to the classic 50’s-style diner run by Old Marjory. Steven finds out this was a mistake when Old Marjory, who absolutely adores him, meets Pearl, who also absolutely adores him. Steven tries to hide his head under his menu and even then, he doesn’t feel like he’s able to fully escape.

“Did you have to tell her the one about the Ready-Whip?” he whines once Old Marjory has stepped away.

Pearl laughs. Steven watches her thumbs fly across the screen of her phone and wonders if he’s part of the reason she’s somehow gotten so fast at texting while he’s been gone. “Why? Were you embarrassed?”

“Uh, duh! Anything that happens when you’re twelve is embarrassing.”

“Huh. Really? I wouldn’t know.”

Steven scoffs and props his elbow up on the formica table. “Course you wouldn’t,” he says with his cheek squished against the heel of his hand. He watches the birds gathering on the telephone wires on the street. After a moment of silence, he looks to Pearl again.

Her pale blue eyes are still on her phone.

Huh.

“So, uh, I know we just drove down the mountain, but we’re going to have to drive back up after dinner to get to the B&B I’m staying at. Sorry about that. Old Marjory’s chicken and waffles make the out-of-the-way drive totally worth it though; I promise.”

Steven looks up from where his finger has begun to idly draw shapes on the patterned formica.

Pearl’s response is a second delayed. “Hm? Oh, no, that’s fine. You know I don’t mind riding in the Dondai with you.”

“Yeah,” Steven says slowly. His eyes dart between Pearl’s face and her phone, hovering in front of her pointed nose. “Speaking of which, the B&B is really cool. It looks like a ski lodge, but much smaller. It’s got this awesome stone fireplace in the common room; I can’t wait for you to see it! I love playing the new Hummingbird with my feet up against the gate.”

“That sounds wonderful, Steven.”

“Yeah…” Steven swallows. He drops his hand from his cheek and straightens up. “So, hey, uh, is everything okay?”

Pearl’s gaze finally snaps up. “Huh? Oh, yes. Everything’s fine.” She smiles and--for the first time that Steven can remember--instead of putting her phone away in the ether of her gem, she turns it over and places it on the table at her elbow. Just before she locks the screen, Steven thinks he catches the name sprawled across the top of the text message window.

Peridot.

Double huh.

He didn’t know those two were on such familiar speaking terms.

“Do you like it here in Peak City?”

Steven chuckles and shrugs, but avoids meeting Pearl’s gaze. He knows what she’s really asking. “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t. Old Marjory’s waffles do make a pretty convincing argument to stay. I just…don’t know if this is the place for me yet.”

“That’s okay! You haven’t been to all 39 states yet. You still have 12 more left, right? That’s 12 more options and countless more cities among them, too.”

It’s the little things--the little details that Pearl remembers--that shows how much she really does pay attention to his texts and letters. His heart feels warm. Whatever tension that was building in his body ebbs. He crosses his arms over the formica table. “Yeah,” he sighs and smiles.

He is so, so glad to see Pearl.

Pearl continues right on as if he hadn’t said a word and he lets her prattle, listening fondly with his chin resting against his forearm.

“You’ll find your place, Steven. And even if that place changes over time, that’s okay, too. Why, you know how many temples your mother, Garnet, and I went through before we settled on the one in Beach City? Not that there were many completed temples on Earth before the war started, and not to mention there were a lot of upgrades we had to do to the temple’s interior to make it suitable, but stars, you should have seen it before we put our own spin on it! Come to think of it, that temple has undergone several changes since then, as well…”

- o - o - o -

It’s not like Pearl needs a bed, but they accept the cot anyway from the kindhearted B&B owner when his husband nods at them from over his shoulder with a look that reads, “Just let him give you the thing and be done with it.”

The cot remains folded and upright on its wheels, pressed to the far wall, as Steven and Pearl stay up late into the night talking and talking and talking.

“How’s everyone in Beach City?”

“Great. The annual Food Truck Fair was two weeks ago. It was a--what do you call it? A hit? Everyone loved it; Beach City had hundreds of off-season visitors. Mayor Nanafua was proud. So was Mr. Dewey, I think. You should come by to see it next year; Blue Lace is talking about getting a Spacetries truck for it.”

“That’s amazing!”

“Little Homeschool’s growing every day. Winter Break’s coming up too, you know. Garnet, Amethyst, your father, and I have been talking about using the time off to come see you together, if you don’t mind dealing with us again in a few weeks.”

“You know there’s nothing I’d love more than that.”

Pearl smiles and puts her hand in his curly hair. She leans forward and presses a kiss to his brow.

“We can talk more tomorrow. Why don’t you get some sleep?”

“Kay. Love you, Pearl.”

“I love you, too, Steven.”

- o - o - o -

Steven isn’t sure what wakes him. He stares groggily at the red 2:03 AM glaring at him from next to the bed and rolls over.

The light of Pearl’s phone screen illuminates her waxy, furrowed face. Her gaze is focused, thumbs moving rapidly across the bottom. Again. A deep frown curls her mouth. Tension tightens her form and stiffens her already rigid posture.

“Pearl?” he groans.

Pearl’s head jerks up from her phone. The light catches her surprise before she locks the screen and douses the room in night.

“Steven?” her voice swims to him from the chair closest to the curtained window. “I’m sorry. I didn’t wake you, did I?”

“I don’t think so.” He rubs at an eye. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes.”

Steven wishes he could see her. Pearl may have been the original secret-keeper, but she has never been good at lying. He wonders if he should ask about her phone; if he should question what’s going on with Peridot and whatever it is that’s got Pearl frowning so much when it’s only the first night of her visit.

But he wonders if that’s just him being petty, hoping she would be so excited to see him that nothing could be wrong.

“You’d tell me if it wasn’t, right?”

There’s a split-second of hesitation. At first, Steven worries that it means whatever follows will be a lie and he doesn’t want to think about the implications of that--but then the mattress dips and familiar, slender fingers card through his curls. A warm hand brushes against the curve of his ear.

“I would, Steven.”

Steven takes a breath. He tells himself to trust those words. With Pearl’s hand in his hair, he falls back to sleep.

- o - o - o -

The next morning, Steven wakes to find that it has once again snowed outside his bedroom window, just as it has for so many of the other nights he’s spent at this B&B. He thinks this might be the perfect time to finally get Pearl on a set of skis at the resort further up the mountain.

“Have you ever done this before?”

“You know,” Pearl says as she stares at the giant boots Steven hands her, “I think I’d remember if I had.”

Steven snickers and takes that as a no. He gets to his knees in front of her feet. “Just a heads-up, then: these are going to get pretty tight.”

“What? Steven? What are you--” Pearl’s face does a weird thing when she looks at him. When he raises an eyebrow, pale blue floods her cheeks and she waves a hand, looking away. “--s-sorry. Go on. What were you saying about the boots?”

“Uh.”

Steven half-wonders if he should say something. He’s spoken with his therapist about this before: how he’s gotten instinctively used to knowing when one of the gems are looking at him but not seeing him. His therapist has said not to skip over that feeling like he has learned to do his entire life.

This could be such a good moment to practice it; he knows it could be.

But he straps on Pearl’s boots for her and says, “I said they’ll feel tight. They’re supposed to be,” anyway and feels disappointed in himself.

“You’re sure I shouldn’t fashion my own?”

“It’s better not to. They’re tight for a reason. You’ll see.” Steven stands back up and picks up the skis sitting next to the crate Pearl’s perched on. He reaches out to hand Pearl her rented set when Pearl’s phone chimes.

“Oh!” As if struck, Pearl straightens. Her hand flies into her pocket. “I’m sorry. Give me just one second, Steven.”

“Oh…uh, okay.” Steven withdraws his hand. And the skis.

The excited smile that had been stretching Pearl’s mouth dims the instant she unlocks her cell.

Steven’s fingers tap against the flat side of his own skis. “You sure everything’s okay?”

Pearl doesn’t answer. She stares at her screen with a deep frown until finally her thumbs dance across its surface madly. “I’m sorry, Steven. What did you say?” she asks when she’s finally done.

Steven watches the phone slip right back into Pearl’s pocket, not her pearl. He passes over the skis.

“It’s nothing.”

- o - o - o -

They take a bunny hill first.

Pearl is nervous, as Steven remembers he himself was a few days ago, but he smiles warmly as he and the attendant patiently explain over and over again how, exactly, she is supposed to fall.

“Why is this even a thing?” Pearl mumbles and Steven laughs. “A sport in which humans first have to learn how to properly fail before they can even begin trying?”

Isn’t that just life? Steven wants to say, but the words balance on the tip of his tongue and don’t slip off. He laughs and shrugs and says instead, “I don’t really know. Must be a human thing, I guess. I think we do a lot of that in general, anyway.”

There’s something in Pearl’s gaze that makes Steven’s chest warm and fuzzy when she looks at him.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Pearl shakes her head. Her soft smile melts into something determined. “All right. Okay! Let’s do this--this--what did you call it? Skiing? Let’s ski, shall we?” she cries and pulls down the snow goggles she fashioned around her own head.

Pearl takes the bunny hill stiffly, her body refusing to yield the snow. She descends the slope in a completely straight line.

Steven laughs so hard he almost falls over.

- o - o - o -

Pearl is a quick study. Steven has always admired that about her: how quickly she can adapt and master a new skill. They talk the entire ski-lift up to the higher hill about it and Pearl gets so bashful after all of his compliments and says, “Oh, stop it,” and Steven realizes how much he really was looking forward to this: spending time with Pearl again.

Then Pearl’s phone chimes.

And Steven’s smile slips.

“Oh! One moment,” Pearl says.

Steven watches the emotions that play across her face as she bends over her phone. He hates the way his chest twists at them. He hates the way he resents something that isn’t really a problem; it shouldn’t be a problem. So why, again, is he upset?

“Okay,” Pearl finally says as their seat approaches the hillcrest. “And just in time!”

The bar is unlocked and Steven drops down onto the snow. His fall is fast and heavy; it shoots hard through his knees.

“Wha--” Pearl scrabbles to follow. She isn’t quite used to the long planks strapped to her boots and wobbles once she lands. Her sticks wave dangerously before she plants them into the snow. “Steven! Wait!”

Steven’s throat is tight and it’s stupid. He feels stupid. He shakes his head and pulls down his goggles. “Sorry. You okay?”

He can’t see Pearl’s face; he knows she can’t see his eyes. But he hates the way he knows all the same that she’s looking at him and seeing straight through him.

“You’re not.”

Steven bursts. “Of course I’m not!”

He hates it as soon as it leaves his mouth but it’s true and didn’t his therapist talk about being more honest about how he feels, anyway? About being more unafraid to talk to his family about the things festering inside? He forcibly swallows down the wall he wants to build in his head and in his heart. “This is probably gonna sound really, really petty, but I was really looking forward to you visiting me, Pearl! I was looking forward to this!”

“Oh, Steven,” Pearl says in that way she always has for as long as he’s known her. She frees a mittened hand and touches his shoulder. “That’s not petty. You know I’ve been looking forward to spending time with you, too.”

“No! I don’t know!”

Pearl blinks. Her hand falters.

“I don’t know that you’ve been looking forward to seeing me again, because honestly it doesn’t feel like you’re here sometimes! Like you’re here, but you’re…not really here. Do you want to be here, Pearl? Do you want to go skiing? Or are you just trying to keep me happy? Because we can go back to the B&B, and you can go back to Beach City if--if there’s more important things waiting for--”

“--oh, Steven!” Pearl’s hand flies to her mouth. “Is that how you feel?”

Okay, so, we’ve reached this point, Steven wants to say to the copy of his therapist in his head. We’ve put everything out there. Now what’s supposed to happen? Is he supposed to feel good?

“Y-yeah,” he rasps. He blinks hard and his ski goggles fog up. He pushes them back up onto his brow with a sniff. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have…”

Pearl hugs him.

“Oh no, Steven, I’m sorry!” she cries. “You’re right! You’re absolutely right! I’ve been so rude to you!” After a sniff, she pulls away and flourishes away her mittens to wipe at her face. “Ugh, I’m such a hypocritical fool! After everything that’s been going on with Bismuth, now I’m doing the same thing to--”

“--w-wait, what’s going on with Bismuth?”

Pearl’s head snaps up. Her cheeks are a strange, unnatural shade of ice blue. “I…”

Steven shoves his ski sticks into the snow and searches Pearl’s face. “Wait. Did something happen to her? Is she okay?”

“What? No. I mean, yes! She’s fine. She’s just…” Pearl looks away. The blue is everywhere, now, spilling down her neck and off-coloring her usual shade of porcelain hue. “…she’s great, actually. Little Homeschool keeps her busy. She’s also been, um, how you like to say ‘hanging out’ with other people. Especially Biggs. Those two have finally reconnected after all this time. They’re thick as thieves. I…I don’t know, I guess I’m just…”

Pieces are startling to click in Steven’s head. One by one. He blinks. “W-wait. Is this why you’ve been texting Peridot? Are you…trying to keep tabs on Bismuth?”

“What? How do you know I’ve been--?”

“--are you jealous, Pearl?”

“Wha--” Pearl freezes, mouth hanging agape and speechless. “Jealous! No! Of course not! I would never…”

Steven can’t help it. He laughs.

Perhaps it’s the relief of finally getting everything off his chest and being told it’s okay. Perhaps it’s just because he’s really glad Pearl’s just being Pearl and nothing is truly seriously wrong at home. Or perhaps he’s just genuinely found it really funny that of all the people in the world, it is Pearl who has found competition trying to vy for Bismuth’s attention--who, last time he was on the phone with, has been voicing similar worries about Pearl and her time she was spending with Volleyball.

“Steven! Are you laughing at me?”

“M-maybe a little,” Steven admits. He pinches off one of his mittens to wipe at his face and dried tears. “Gosh, this is just like a reverse of that time you guys took me to that vacation house. It’s…wow.” He chuckles again. “I’m really glad you told me this.”

“I…” The anger deflates as quickly as it came. Pearl softens. “…yes. I could say the same to you, Steven.”

She reaches forward and cups his cheek. Steven stills under her touch.

“Really, though. I am sorry. It was never my intention to make you feel like you weren’t important to me or that I didn’t care about this opportunity to spend time with you, when everything I feel is the exact opposite. You mean the world to me, Steven. You should know that.”

Steven’s smile wobbles; it melts into something crooked and tender and touched. He sniffs and wipes at his face with chilled fingers before he remembers he should slip on his mitten again. “You mean the world to me, too, Pearl. Wanna go down this slope together?”

Pearl reaches into her pocket and touches her phone to her gem. With a small shimmer of light, the device disappears.

“I’d love nothing more.”

- o - o - o -

“…then she said, ‘Whoa there, Pearl! Don’t you know? It’s Bismuth before pleasure!’ And I--”

Steven howls.

“--I didn’t know what to say!” Pearl laughs in the middle of her words, breaking up her speech. “I had no idea what to do. I was still under the mindset that I was just a Pearl! It was so embarrassing for me; I can’t even imagine what it must have been like for her!”

Steven has to hold on to the neck of the Hummingbird so as not to let it topple forward off his lap. The strings hum under the hard pressure of his fingers.

Pearl sighs, a nostalgic smile spread across her face. She plucks a G on Steven’s old ukulele. “Oh, but that was eons ago. I doubt she even remembers that now.”

“I don’t know, Pearl,” Steven hums once he’s finally done laughing. He leans back and props his socked feet up on the iron gate of the common room’s stone fireplace. “I still say you should talk to her. After all you’ve got to…” He dramatically strums a pleasing D. “…mind your own Bismuth, right?”

Pearl laughs and shoves his shoulder gently. “Oh-ho-ho, stop.”

Steven chuckles and rocks back. He rests his shoulder against Pearl’s side. He strums another G. “Really, though. Thanks for coming to see me, Pearl. I hope you had as much fun as I did today skiing.”

Pearl hums happily and echoes the chord. “I had a lot of fun with you today, Steven.”

Steven lifts his chin to look up at her.

When Steven starts strumming, Pearl follows along. When he opens his mouth and sings, “I don’t care if it weighs a ton,” she sings with him, “As long as you and I are here, put it there,” dipping her voice in pleasant harmony.

The hearthfire crackles at their feet, warm and strong.

- o - o - o -

If there’s a fight, I’d like to fix it I hate to see things go so wrong The darkest night, and all its mixed emotions It’s getting lighter sing along

- “Put it There” by Paul McCartney

#steven universe #steven universe future #su #suf #pearl #fanfic #krissey writes a thing #fluff bingo!#here we go again #i couldn't help myself and also had to integrate a paul mccartney song #my impulse control is not so great on quarantine guys #but we been knew this #i hope u enjoy the fluff #competition

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crassussativum · 5 years

Text

Mass Effect Asks Masterlist- Mav

(Originally posted by thenerdcommander, credit where credit is due.)

1. What would their recruitment mission look like? ((Mav’s got a mind for tactical skirmishes and fighting with the reapers and subsequent indoctrinated has been an exercise in gorilla warfare. He’s made his way to Palaven and Menae to be of what help he can. Maybe he even already works directly with Garrus there. When Shepard arrives there and after they find the Primarch, he tags along.))

2. Would they be a romance option? If so, who would the option be available to and what would their romance look like? Would there be any special scenes? ((Mav is an equal opportunist in the art of romance. Male or female Shepard, it doesn’t matter. He flirts a little, teases some. Then straight out says he’s been serious the whole time and why not, right? Special scene would probably involve him talking Shepard on a date. Like dinner and dancing date.))

3. If there is one, what would their sex scene look like? How would the scene change if Shepard or Ryder turned the sex down? ((Mav surprises Shepard in their cabin. He’s probably not wearing all that much, y’know. If Shepard’s into it, cool, if not, he puts his clothes back on and hey no big deal, you down for a drink, Shep?))

4. If left unromanced, do they hook up with another character? If so, who is it? Is it a canon character or another OC? ((More than likely and probably another OC though I couldn’t rightfully say who.))

5. Would they be available as a fling option? What would that scene look like? ((Also probably and idk, something sexy.))

6. Is there any way Shepard or Ryder could get them to turn on them or betray them? How? Is there any way to get them to back down once the betrayal is triggered? ((The only way that I could think of would be if Shepard were to ask/order Mav to do something he considers evil. Such as unnecessary loss of innocent life, civilians in the cross fire. Shepard wouldn’t do that. BUT if Shep did, there’d be no talking Mav down after.))

7. What would their loyalty mission look like? ((It would break your fucking heart. During the Reaper War, Mav gets word from Carthaan, his homeworld. His family needs him. Shepard, of course, goes with to help. When they arrive on Carthaan, there is nothing but ruin, they’re too late to do anything. The crux of the loyalty mission lies in one action: Shepard can escort Mav to his family home to see for himself that there’s nothing left which will resort in his loyalty. Or Shepard tells him there’s no point, lack of survivors is obvious, at which point Mav goes off on his own and doesn’t return.))

8. Is there any way to lose their loyalty after it’s earned? How? ((Mav’s a little sensitive when it comes to familial bonds. He’d want Shepard to extend anyone the same courtesy that he got with his loyalty mission. He gets the need for closure, he’d want the rest of the crew taken care of.))

9. What would their relationship with Renegade Shepard look like? Paragon Shepard? If they’re from Andromeda, what’s their relationship with Ryder (pick any two alignments)? ((Mav’s easy going. He understands grey areas. Sometimes you’ve gotta do things the wrong way to make sure the right thing happens. Him and a Renegade Shepard would get on like a house fire. But at the same time, he knows when not to cross a line. Better things would happen with a Paragon Shepard.))

10. What phrase(s) would they shout during combat? ((Mav’s...er, a well educated man in profanity. Let’s leave it at that.))

11. Any squadmates they don’t particularly get along with? ((Um... I’m gonna say probably James. At least not at first, but eventually they get on fine.))

12. Are there any instances where rivalries between them and another squadmate could potentially jeopardize their loyalty or views of Shepard or Ryder? (Nah,)

13. Which squadmates are they likely to make friends with? ((Damn near everyone. He’s easy going, like I said, he makes friends pretty easily.))

14. In which game would they be introduced to the franchise? ME1? ME2? ME3? Andromeda? ((I think he’s always been kinda in the background, but ME3)

15. Would they make multiple appearances throughout the games or are they limited to one installment? If they reappear, do they remain as a squadmate or do they become an NPC? (Squadmate in ME3, kicking around elsewhere.))

16. Which skills are available to them? If they’re from the OT, pick four active powers and one unique passive class power (ex: Turian Agent, Asari Commando, Turian Smuggler, etc). If they’re from Andromeda, pick three active powers and two passive (one of which should be a unique class power). ((Mav’s my Infiltrator! He’s got a Tactical Cloak, some Disruptor Amo, Incinerate on standby, and sticky grenades for kicks!))

17. Write a quick exchange of banter between them and one other squadmate of your choice. (( I can’t think of actual words bc I suck at banter, but I can totally see Mav teasing James about his fighting style on the mats. And that tiny turians are fast turians and he fucking told James he’d floor him in no time.))

18. What weapons would they use? Pick 1 minimum, maximum of 2 firearms, 1 melee weapon, and/or 1 special or unique weapon. ((M-6 Carnifex, M-27 Scimitar- for his oh shit weapon- a knife he carries in his sleeve for close combat, and when shit hits the fan... He’s got a Cobra Missile Launcher))

19. Name one thing that players would remember them most by (ex: Garrus’ calibrations, “Lola”, Mordin’s singing, etc). ((The way he looks and sounds. Mav’s a small turian, standing at only 5′7″, his eyes are bright orange and so are his markings. And he’s got a good ol’ boy southern accent.))

20. If they’re from the OT, what ways could they be killed on Virmire, during the Suicide Mission, or the events of ME3 (pick one)? If they’re from Andromeda, are there any ways they could die? If so, how and how could Ryder prevent it if prevention is possible at all? ((Well, if Shepard doesn’t escort him in his loyalty mission, he presumably dies on Carthaan searching for his family.))

21. Can they be Indoctrinated or Exalted? If so, what would they be like? What options would Shepard or Ryder have to handle the situation? Would there have been options to prevent it? ((No.))

22. How would they react to other squadmates, Shepard, or Ryder being Indoctrinated or Exalted? ((....He’d put them out of their misery.))

23. When on the Tempest or Normandy, where do they like to stay? Do they roam around? What about on the Citadel or Nexus? (Mav, a Blackwatch assassin by trade, would chill with Thane. To share notes, let’s say, or to talk philosophy. On the Citadel, there’s a few places he might hang at, a bar, the embassies, shops. He’d wander., ME3, he’d be at the docks.)

24. Do they have an opinion on the way Shepard drives the Mako? Or how Ryder drives the Nomad? ((Nah, it’s not like Mav drives any better.)

25. Are they vocal about their opinions of the Council or Nexus Leadership? If so, what is their opinion? Do they make a passing comment to another squadmate or do they say it to Shepard or Ryder directly? ((He’s not, not really. He might say something nasty if he gets frustrated with the run around of the whole thing, but that’s it.))

26. What decisions could Shepard or Ryder make that they greatly disapprove of? ((Ok so....Siding with the geth. Sentient AI is a dangerous thing and will always be a dangerous thing and aren’t the Reapers literally proving that right now?))

27. What decisions could Shepard or Ryder make that they greatly approve of? ((Shepard doing everything they can to undue/fix what was done with the Genephage.))

28. Would they have any special scenes or dialogue in the Citadel DLC or for Movie Night? (Nah, he’s busy trying to drink Wrex and Grunt under the table. Mav loves his Horosk and that’s not too different from Ryncol))

29. Would they have any special scenes or dialogue in the final battle against the Reapers or the Archon? ((Just a moment to thank Shepard for doing all they could, a little pep-talk, a little let’s go fuck their shit up.))

30. How would they react to meeting Shepard’s clone? Or Ryder’s twin? ((Mav would find the whole thing funny as fuck. He’s pretty sure he’s seen this B movie.))

#ooc #Mav #mass effect asks #masterlist #just for fun #long post

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chasholidays · 6 years

Note

Hi! Thanks for doing this again, I hope you have a fun time with it!!!

Set in the same universe as this fill, bc they worked together and why not?

Quite by accident, and without putting any deliberate effort in whatsoever, John Murphy becomes an upstanding citizen who is considered a good prospect for marriage by respectable parents all over the town, which is so unthinkable that he doesn’t even realize it’s happening until it’s too late.

Murphy has always been fortune-adjacent without ever being particularly fortunate himself. His parents worked for Lord Jacob and Lady Abigail Griffin, who had been excellent employers, but they were, at the end of the day, employers. When Murphy’s parents died, they didn’t turn him out, but they weren’t his new family. He just started working for them.

But he and Clarke had always gotten along. She was a year younger than he was, bright and shrewd, and without any other children her age to play with, she was happy to spend time with him.

When she befriended Bellamy Blake, humble tailor, Murphy had known something was going on, but he didn’t mention it. When Bellamy suddenly became much less humble, Clarke recommended he hire Murphy, and that was when Murphy’s fortune began to take off. As Bellamy’s first employee and business manager, he’s not on the same level of wealth as Clarke, or even Bellamy himself, but he’s much better off than he ever expected to be.

Which is why he is, somehow, one of the most eligible bachelors in town.

“I didn’t know the town was that desperate,” he tells Clarke, dry, when she informs him of this fact.

“Bellamy’s a good connection now,” she points out. “He’s my husband, you’re his right-hand man. Getting close to you would get a family close to us, and all of our stars are on the rise.”

“Great. You couldn’t have thought of that before you got married?”

She rolls her eyes. “So, I shouldn’t have married the man I love to keep you from becoming richer and more successful?”

When she puts it like that, he does sound kind of unreasonable. “I don’t want anyone trying to marry me.”

“No?”

“What, I’m supposed to?”

“Plenty of men want to get married. And you’d have your pick of rich wives who could help you rise in society, if you wanted. More options are always good,” she adds.

“Yeah, because you had your choice of every rich guy in the country and went with a tailor you found on the street.”

She knows him well enough to not take it as a slight against herself or her husband. Bellamy is a tailor she found on the street. That’s part of his appeal. “I looked at every rich guy in the country and realized I didn’t want any of them.”

“Romantic.”

“If you don’t want to marry, don’t marry,” she says, with a fluid shrug of her shoulders. “But think about what you might want in a wife and let me know. I’ll see if I can find it for you.”

“So what, now that you’re settled, you think it’s time to get me married?”

She starts counting off on her fingers. “I’m married, Bellamy’s married, Raven’s married, Miller and Monty are settled. You’re the last person on my list.”

“Lucky me.” But she’s coming from a good place, and it’s not as if she’s wrong. If he wants to marry, now is the time, before Clarke and Bellamy screw up and get disowned or something. If he plays his cards right, he could be set for life.

It’s just that Murphy’s never been that sold on marriage, as a general concept. He gets the advantages, especially for men, having someone to take care of the house and manage daily affairs, but he doesn’t need that. He can manage his own affairs, and if he wants a housekeeper, he’ll hire one. He doesn’t want children, and he’s not longing for companionship, romantic, sexual, or otherwise.

“No one’s going to trap me into a compromising position and marry me, right?” he asks.

Clarke pauses for longer than he feels entirely comfortable with. “Not that you can’t get out of.”

“Meaning what?”

“Meaning if you get caught in a compromising position with someone you don’t want to marry, we can probably get you out of it.”

“You’re not blowing me away with confidence here.”

“If you get someone pregnant, there’s not a lot we can do,” she says, with the kind of flat honesty he appreciates and expects from her. “If you get caught in a broom closet with a girl, that’s fine.”

“Trust me, I’m not going to get anyone pregnant.” He sighs. “I’m not making any promises, okay? But if you find someone you think I should marry, yeah. You can let me know.”

Her smile does not inspire any kind of confidence in him that this was the right thing to say. “Perfect. I’ll keep you posted.”

“You definitely have no one to blame but yourself for this.”

Murphy takes a petulant sip of his punch, watching the crowd of people dancing and chatting with Raven and Miller. Ever since he and Clarke talked about his potential marriage, he’s been dragged to a ball every week, danced with enough young ladies he’s lost track, and is getting less and less interested in marrying anyone by the second.

“I think I can blame Clarke.”

Miller scowls, glaring at his own punch. “I’m blaming you. I don’t have enough excuses to get out of this.”

“Get in an accident,” Raven says, tapping her leg with her cane. “It’s an excuse not to dance for the rest of your life.”

“I might need one.”

“You aren’t thinking about a marriage of convenience?” she asks, sounding interested. “Clarke’s got to know someone who never wants to be with a man. You and Monty could make an arrangement with another couple.”

“Saving that for a last resort,” says Miller. “Well, right before I break my leg.”

“So what’s your excuse, Murphy?” Raven asks. “Why don’t you want to get married?”

“Why do I need an excuse? I think I need a good reason to get married, not a good reason not to. It’s a pain to get out of it.”

“Yeah, I can’t argue with that. Still, it’s not bad, if you find someone you like.”

Which really is the problem, right there. Murphy likes his friends, most of the time, but he’s not sure he likes any of them enough for the level commitment a marriage would require. And they’re the people he likes the most. You still couldn’t pay him enough to marry Clarke.

You could pay plenty of these women enough to marry him, and that’s just depressing. Murphy’s not going to be a good husband, and plenty of them must know that.

“That’s what I’m seeing,” he says, finishing his drink. “So far? I don’t like anyone.”

“Yeah, that sounds like you.”

“What would a wife for Murphy even look like?” Miller asks, sounding thoughtful. “You really think there’s some upper-class lady who would be happy with him?”

“I wasn’t really picturing him happy.”

“Gee, thanks,” says Murphy. “Why would I ever want to be happy?”

“You’re not happy now,” says Raven, not unreasonably. “If you think marriage is going to fix all your problems, you’re thinking about marriage wrong. It’s not going to change your whole life. You need to find someone who fits into your life already and makes it better, even with all you–” She looks down at the leg, which he knows still hurts her. “Realities.”

It’s a shocking amount of sentiment, especially from Raven, and it leaves both Murphy and Miller gaping. Miller recovers first. “Wow, marriage has really made you go soft.”

“Imagine what it would do to Murphy.”

Miller shudders. “Don’t make me think about it.” He drains his punch. “All right, I better dance at least one. If I see anyone good, I’ll send them your way.”

For a moment, Murphy and Raven lean against the wall in silence, but he has to ask, “You don’t really think I’m going to find someone here, do I?”

“Which part should I not think?” He cocks his head, and she clarifies, “Finding someone, or finding someone here?”

“Here. You don’t think any of these girls really want to marry me, do you? The ones looking for a fortune?”

“I wouldn’t have,” she says, sounding thoughtful. “Not before I met Clarke. But just because these girls’ parents want them to marry a rich guy, it doesn’t mean they aren’t interesting. One of them might surprise you.”

“Miller’s right, you did go soft.”

“I could still kick your ass. Soft heart, broken leg, and all.”

“Yeah,” he agrees. “No question.”

“I wouldn’t take that if I were you.”

Murphy glances over, sees a woman next to him at the refreshment table, a glint in her eye as she smiles at him. It’s the glint that gets him, more than the prettiness of her features.

“Excuse me?”

She leans in, close enough that her words are private. “I tried those earlier, you should learn from my mistake.”

He laughs, surprised. There’s no one around who might be offended by their gossiping about the food, but he drops his own voice too. “What’s wrong with them?”

“Undercooked and overseasoned.”

“Thanks for the warning.” She moves down the line and he follows her, studying her as surreptitiously as he can manage. She has dark hair and dark eyes, her figure nice enough under a dress which is, to his fairly informed eye, a few seasons old and not tailored to her. She doesn’t look that much younger than he is, so she’s probably been out for a while, still looking for a husband. “Anything you can recommend?” he asks. He can be friendly.

“These hand pies are quite good,” she says, taking one. “You’re Mr. Murphy, aren’t you?”

“Just Murphy is fine. How did you know?”

“You’re the focal point of this entire event,” she says, an amused note in her voice. “Didn’t you know?”

“I was hoping I wasn’t.”

He had thought he might prefer afternoon tea to a ball, in terms of socialization exercises, and while he appreciates not being expected to dance, he’s not much for small talk either.

“Did Lady Clarke not tell you?”

“She’s selective about how she presents information.” He wets his lips. “I didn’t get your name.”

“Emori.”

“Given or surname?”

“Given. I don’t like my surname much.”

It’s an interesting statement, but he knows plenty of rich ladies who don’t like ceremony much. If she gives out her surname, people will call her that. “How do you know Lady Clarke?”

“The same way everyone does.”

“But I haven’t met you before.”

“You’re very popular. It’s hard to get your attention.”

“So you’re warning me off bad food?”

She smiles, not the typical kind of smile from a girl who wants to impress him. It’s sharper, more wry. “I consider it a public service. If you’ll excuse me.”

She ducks away with a smile, going to talk to Harper, apparently unconcerned with Murphy or anything he’s doing. It shouldn’t bother him–it’s not like he cares if she likes him–but it does nag at him. The whole encounter felt deliberate, like she was doing it on purpose, the first step in a very long plan to–

Marry him, probably. What else would she want?

That feeling alone should be enough to get her off his mind, but even knowing it was a trick, he can’t stop wondering about her. How did she know this would make him curious? Was she sure this would work on him, or did she just get lucky?

“That was a bust,” Bellamy remarks, when the gathering is done and everyone has left. “Right?” he adds, looking to Murphy.

“The food wasn’t bad. Except the scones, I heard they were undercooked.”

Clarke sighs. “It’s always something. You didn’t meet anyone?”

“What do you know about a woman named Emori?”

“Not much.” She shrugs. “An orphan, I think? But her parents left her with a decent dowry. We haven’t talked much. You liked her?”

It feels like too much of an admission, especially now. If he tells Clarke he liked her, Clarke will run with it. It’ll be a thing. Emori will probably find out, and maybe she’ll think she doesn’t have to do the rest of the steps of the plan. He’s kind of curious where it goes from here.

“She’s the one who said the scones were undercooked. So I don’t know if you want to just take her word for it.”

Clarke doesn’t look particularly fooled by the deflection, so Murphy turns his attention to Bellamy.

“Other than the food, yeah. Definitely a bust.”

Bellamy’s not buying it either, of course. They’re both too smart to swallow so lazy an excuse.

But they’re also not ready to push him. He was betting on that too.

So Bellamy says, “Definitely,” and the conversation moves on, but at the back of his mind, Murphy is still thinking about Emori, and he’s pretty sure everyone knows it.

Whatever she’s doing, it’s definitely working. Murphy can’t even be mad.

Once he’s been introduced to Emori, he can’t stop noticing her. He can’t tell if she’d always been around and he just missed her or if this really is a new thing, if she was out of town and only just returned, if she only just decided he was worth looking for. If it’s all some master plan to win him over, once she heard that conventional methods weren’t working.

And then he feels like a self-centered dick who let all this stupid eligible bachelor shit go to his head, because the world does not actually revolve around him, and Emori probably makes her decisions based on more than a long game to trick him into marriage.

“You like her,” Raven surmises.

“She doesn’t even talk to me, I barely know her.”

“So you’re offended she’s not talking to you when you’re the most important single man in the city?” Monty asks. Murphy thought he might be more sympathetic than his partner, but he doesn’t seem to think the situation is serious enough to warrant sympathy.

Then again, if Murphy wanted sympathy, he should have made friendships that weren’t based around mockery and brutal honesty.

“She did talk to me. I’m not saying it is a scheme, just that I don’t get her. Everyone knows the whole point of all this shit is to get married, and she’s not even trying, so why does she come? It’s not like it’s fun.”

“I’m not trying to get married and I keep coming,” Monty points out. “It’s so I can tell my parents I’m trying.”

“She’s barely trying. And Clarke said she was an orphan.”

“If you want to talk to her, talk to her,” says Raven. “If you’re just upset that she doesn’t seem interested enough, stop being an asshole and move on.”

“I’m not being an asshole,” he mutters, reflexive, but she is right. Raven usually is.

“I’m going to go talk to her,” Monty declares.

“What?”

“I’m curious,” he says. “Come on.”

“Why am I coming?”

“Because I don’t know who she is.”

She’s talking to Echo when they find her, wearing the same dress Murphy saw her in before. She’s still lovely, and her eye still has that glint in it that makes Murphy want to talk to her more.

It might be a good idea to just lean into it.

“Mr. Murphy,” says Emori, dropping a curtsy.

“Murphy,” says Echo, curt as always. He does like her. “Monty. What do you want?”

“I haven’t been introduced to Miss–” Monty starts, and she smiles.

“Just Emori, thank you.”

“And I’m just Monty. Echo, would you care to dance?”

She sizes him up, and then Murphy, and shrugs. “Sure, why not. Don’t step on my feet.”

Emori gives Murphy a sidelong glance. “So, it’s working?”

“What is?”

“Ignoring you.”

“I knew you were doing that on purpose!” he bursts out, and she smirks.

“Don’t let it go to your head, I ignore lots of men.”

“Because you aren’t interested in talking to them?”

“Because I’ve found men find it irritating.”

“Yeah, we deserve that.” He clears his throat. “Look, I’m not very good at this whole–social graces thing.”

“I noticed.”

“You want to dance or not?”

“Do you dance?” she asks, looking him up and down in a pointed way.

“Not very well.”

“Neither do I,” she says, uncrossing her arms to show him her left hand. It’s a little warped, a birth deformity, most likely, and he recognizes the challenge in her eyes as she watches his reaction.

“I don’t see what that has to do with dancing,” he says. “My feet are the problem.”

She lets out a very unladylike snort of laughter. “Some gentlemen don’t like holding my hand very much.”

“I’m not a gentleman,” he says. “Let’s do it.”

After he’s seen her hand and (apparently) not reacted incorrectly, Murphy starts to interact more with Emori. They dance at least one dance at every party, and he starts to see her on the street, in passing, and he’ll even call on her sometimes, when he’s in the neighborhood.

He may go out of his way to be in her neighborhood, too.

It’s not that he loves her, or even that he wants to marry her. He just still can’t shake the feeling that there’s more to her, that there’s still something he’s missing. He wants to figure her out, and he doesn’t know how.

Bellamy’s the one to finally take him aside and ask, “Have you ever actually been interested in anyone before?”

“What?”

He drums his fingers on the counter. “You keep saying you don’t want to marry her, but I’m not sure why not. You like her, you want to get to know her better, are you sure you’re not falling for her?”

“I’m suspicious of her.”

Bellamy rolls his eyes. “You can’t stop thinking about her.”

“Wondering what she’s really doing.”

“You’re not willing to admit that you’re interested in her, and you’re afraid she’s not interested in you. I get it, trust me,” he adds, with half a smile. “I still can’t believe Clarke wanted to marry me. And you don’t have to ask her. But you should be honest about how you feel and what you want.”

“Probably, yeah.” He scowls at nothing in particular. “I want to know more about her. Understand her.”

“What if you find out she wants to marry you?”

“I’d be kind of disappointed.”

His eyebrows go up. “Why?”

“I was hoping there was more to her than that.”

“Maybe she wants to marry you because she likes you. And if she just needs a good marriage and thinks you’d be one, would that be so bad? There’s nothing wrong with a woman wanting to make a good marriage.”

“There’s something wrong with them thinking I’m the good marriage,” Murphy snaps, and Bellamy’s expression softens.

“You could be a fine husband to someone. A fine husband to her. And maybe the fact that she’s acting how she is means she knows how to be a find wife to you too.”

“Maybe,” he says, but he can’t really bring himself to believe it.

Which means that, if he’s honest, discovering she’s stealing from him is a huge relief.

She’s been to visit him a handful of times, the same as he’s visited her. It’s always been ordinary and completely proper, and he always enjoyed having her stop by. He’d hoped he’d see more of her, but was not expecting to see her in the middle of the night when he was looking for some water.

“That’s not actually valuable,” he tells her, and she freezes, just for a second, before she straightens and smiles. She’s dressed in plain, dark clothing, trousers and a shirt, like a man might wear, with her dark hair pulled back.

As always, she’s lovely. Moreso, even. She looks so much more comfortable like this.

“No?”

“I don’t think so.”

“It looks like a family heirloom.”

“You thought my family had heirlooms? I’m starting to see what you saw in me.”

Her smile falters. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’m not from some rich, noble family with a long history of owning useless shit. Everything in here is mine, and I got it cheap so I could save most of my money to live on.”

“Not how the most marriageable bachelor in the town is supposed to be living,” she observes. Her tone is light, but she looks tense. Understandably so, since she was caught in his home, trying to rob him, but he’s not actually upset.

“I still don’t get it,” he admits. “You thought this was the best way to get close to me? And that I was the best person for you to try to rip off?”

“I can’t tell which one you find more offensive.”

“Not offensive, confusing. I get it,” he adds. “I was pretty sure I was going to be out on the streets after my parents died, I was ready to steal as much as I could from the Griffins before I left.”

“You’re not Lord Henry Murphy of the Polis Murphys,” says Emori, slowly.

“Who?”

She slumps back against the wall with a defeated sigh. “I heard a Murphy was making waves in the town, I knew Lord Henry had moved recently, I assumed–”

“You were trying to rob the wrong person?”

She shoots a glare at him. “How was I supposed to know you were the wrong person? You’re rich and the most eligible bachelor in town. It’s certainly not for your glowing personality.”

He laughs, and she relaxes a little. “So, your dowry isn’t as good as I’ve heard it is?”

“I have no dowry, not any family.” Her voice is too sharp. “I’m not orphaned, my parents simply decided their fortunes would be better off without a daughter with flaws like mine.”

“Assholes,” he says, before he can think better of it, but she smiles. “So, what do you need the money for?”

“The same thing everyone needs money for. Food, shelter, and to keep it out of the hands of people I don’t like.”

“If you’d disappeared at the same time I lost a bunch of my stuff, I would have known it was you.”

She shrugs, easy, with a smile playing on her lips like she’s still not telling him something. Of course, she’ll probably be gone in the morning, now that he’s found her out.

“Wouldn’t it be easier to just get married?” he asks.

“Maybe for you. Some of us aren’t spoiled for choice.”

“I meant me,” he says. She frowns, which means he has the chance to get out of the offer, but he finds he doesn’t really want to. The missing piece is that she’s some sort of con woman, and she was acting the way she had been as part of a plot to get his attention, gain his trust, and rob him. Now that he knows that, he can put together the rest of her actions, and he likes her.

Likes her better, even. That’s probably something to worry about. But if his family disowned him for a birth defect and he couldn’t make a good match or find a good job, he’d probably be fleecing rich people too.

And everyone does keep telling him he doesn’t have to marry a proper lady, just someone who fits into his life.

“I’m not that rich,” he says. “I’ve got a job and my boss likes me and pays me well. His wife is rich, I know some powerful people. I’m not a lord, but if you just want a husband who’ll treat you right and make sure you’ve got a good life, I’m your man.”

“You want to marry me,” she says, sounding vaguely stunned.

“Why not?”

“You found me in your house, in the middle of the night, trying to steal from you.”

“Yeah, so you clearly need money. Marriage seems like an easier, safer way to get it than stealing from people, and this way you can stick around instead of leaving town.”

“And what do you get out of it?”

“I get married and everyone stops asking me when it’s going to happen. I’m not worried about marrying some lady I’ve got nothing in common with, and as long as I give you food, shelter, and money that could have gone to assholes instead, you’re happy, right?”

“Not very romantic of you.”

“I found you in my house in the middle of the night trying to steal from me,” he points out. “How much romance are you looking for?” But he does want her to marry him, so he makes himself add, “Look, this whole marriage thing? I wasn’t doing that well with it.”

She smirks. “I heard.”

“You’re the only person I met I could actually think about marrying. Stealing and all.”

“You have very peculiar taste in women, H–” She frowns. “I don’t even know your given name.”

“John,” he says. “But no one calls me that.”

“You have very peculiar taste in women, John Murphy,” she says, ignoring him.

“Is that a yes?”

“If it’s not, are you going to call the police?”

“No.”

“Then it’s a maybe.” She leans up and kisses him on the cheek. “I’ll see you later, John.”

“See you,” he echoes, and just like that, she’s gone.

A week later, Murphy goes downstairs in the morning and finds the figurine Emori was looking at gone, and his heart sinks. He hadn’t really thought she’d marry him, but he thought he had a few more weeks of hoping, of not being sure.

“Joke’s on you,” he mutters. “It really is worthless.”

It’s only then that he notices the piece of paper left in its place, a note written in a neat, unfamiliar hand.

Dear John,

If you want this back, come to St. Michael’s Church tomorrow at three o'clock. Otherwise, I’m selling it for however much I can get.

-E

P.S. Wear something nice. It IS your wedding.

Murphy grins, whistles a little as he goes into the kitchen to find something for breakfast.

Maybe marriage won’t be so bad.

#romansuzume

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coe-lilium · 5 years

Note

Hey Lilium! Thanks for your answer, it was really informative! I’ve got myself a litte tablet atm which is really working for me. I meant to ask about character design too- what advice could you give on that?

I’m glad it was helpful!

Here’s my experience with chara des then, bearing in mind that I’ve yet to finalize a single original charades and all I’ve done till now are redesigns, which -for me, at least?- are a lot easier since they give you a guideline, even if just to say “I’m doing the opposite”.

1. Find a main theme for the project/piece

2. Research-research-research

3. Bear in mind that you’re creating/altering something for you to like

4, bonus. once you’re done, consider the audience you’ll show -or not- your work to.

1. the main theme/idea for all my redesigns is “I love Fate, but I also love history and die a little every time a Fate design has nothing to do with the character period/culture/history. I wonder what they’ll look like with accurate clothes?”. I’m still running with it, but it needed some adjustments along the way.

The very first attempt, Martha, was as historically accurate I could manage, which… wasn’t a lot. “low class jewish woman of the 1st century aC” was a little too specific and google gave me little to work on and I had to resort to religious depictions. I’m still happy with her, but now I can see that in my wish to make her as historically plausible as possible I ended up with a design too accurate, to the point of being, well, bland. Bland and sticking out like a sore thumb if put next to any other Fate character. If and when I’ll revamp her, I’ll add details and be careful to include something to convey her personality.

So, 1:1 with history was out, next best thing I had was mixing history and the “Fate”/anime aesthetic. Not for every character, mind (Nitocris looks quite fine in clothes taken straight out of a Egyptian parietal painting), but now that I’ve tried, I’ve settled down for “how they’ll look like with evident historical and cultural inspirations?”, which is what I’ve done for Boudica, Jeanne and Bradamante, what I’ll keep doing for the next pieces and also for the original Servants I’m planning.

Speaking of originals Servants, since I’m having troubles explaining things in general, I’ll use one of them as an example for the next point.

*under the cut for length*

2. Let’s say I want to design another lady from the Orlando Innamorato/Furioso, Marfisa, as a potential Servant.

As a first step I collect info from the source material.

She’s of noble origins, mixed race, “pagan”/muslim (it’s complicated), possibly either north African or Arabian, queen of 7 countries by the time she’s 18, devout, proud, brave, honourable and incredibly skilled as a warrior, has no magic aids or objects but win on sheer ability alone. Twin of Ruggiero (Brad’s fiancee), friend of Astolfo and Bradamante. Had an armor she cared a lot for and went to great lengths to get back when it got stolen.

(me being me, I also went to academia.edu, found articles/PhD on her and read them to better understand the character, but there’s few chara I’m willing to research to this length for a redesign).

Considering Servants are summoned at their peaks, physically I’ll have her look in her late teens/early twenties, brown skin and with a hijab (which will require some research by itself).

Onto deciding the clothes/armor now:

- the “official” time period of her life should be that of historical Charlemagne rule and life, but the works in which she features have no claims of historicity whatsoever and were published in 1483 and 1516.

- comes from the same material as the Paladins and thus should -imo- looks like she somehow belongs with them even if she’s in their enemy camp and from a different culture.

- as they are now, the Paladins common (?) aesthetic seems to be, sorry can’t contain the snark, “random fantasy isekai reject”, with Astolfo being the best designed by miles and Charles looking fine in his alt armored skin, the rest being a disaster. This point has the highest chance not to get contemplated in the final design bc I loathe it. Being less snarky, the few positive design details point to their inspiration being rooted more in 1500 than 800 AC fashion, so I’ll keep that in mind.

So, she’s got no reason to being accurate with a single period (or culture) but could should instead integrate bits from many places and eras. Influences from easily accessible media is welcome, both to mirror the Paladins LN influences and bc the og poems were incredibly successful and printed in spades and read in courts and less noble houses alike.

Now that I have my guidelines it’s finally time to hunt for visual references.

Looking for historical islamic countries armor is a obligatory step bc I personally have no idea how they looked like and if I find how they were assembled and what colors were used it will be helpful to build my own ver and know how things attach. The period and place doesn’t count, I simply go for what I like more and think this particular chara would wear. Your mileage my vary, but for me history is always the first step to start from, bc if you use only popular media or artistic depictions there’s the chance to make mistakes easily corrected when looking at how the real stuff worked and also to get more… repetitive?

Then I look for how the character’s being depicted before in art of all periods. In this case all I found was a white lady in european armor, completely useless, but usually there’s a lot more and for other characters this “spot” is where I spend most of my researching time after the historical one.

Then I look for… video games with historical settings that fit my criteria (remember, popular media). Find something I like and keep digging into a particular game and -if lucky enough- in the deviantart pages of the artists responsible for that or that other design.

After I’ve collected a lot of different refs I go here on tumblr or on DA or in dedicated sites to find nice palettes and after I’ve got different options for these as well, rejoice!, research time is finally over!

Now’s time to mix all the influences and draw :D

3. Not a lot to say here, just that if you’re not working under commission then you’re doing this for fun and mostly for yourself, so put in the things you like. You like implausible fantasy/jrpg/videogame/cartoon aesthetic more than IRL/ historical aesthetic? Dang, go for it.

My mindset got a lot better when I embraced the fact I wasn’t redesigning these characters to “make them objectively better”, there was no “mission”: I was doing this to please myself and my own tastes, and that was enough.

4. For example, I know I could cover all the Fate ladies in armor for no other reason than I like ladies in armor and find at least neutral reactions on this blog or my DA page, but you’ll never see me post my works in the fgo reddit, even those I’m more proud of, because I know that subreddit and I have no intention to submit myself to a river of mocking, accuses of puritanism and muh censorship!!.

I suppose this suggestion’s useless if you want to always widen your audience and/or are looking for employment in the field and need all the recognition you can get, but as I have no intention of doing either I get to decide where to show my stuff and to avoid places where it’s likely the reactions will make me feel miserable. No one needs that noise in their life for a hobby, fuck that.

Last but not for relevance, as a cautionary tale? Spite/anger at something can be one hell of a motivation to start working, but it’s not enough to let you finish a project unless you start enjoy what you’re creating down the road.

In case of og chara it shouldn’t be any spite, but as soon as you get tired of your work, stop, put it on hiatus and go concentrate on something else. We’re doing this because it makes us happy, it’s no good to let it drag and become a chore.

#paragon-arthur #answer #drawing tips #???#i guess??#man i've never taken classes on this take with massive grain of salt bc it's only how i work

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goodfemalecharacters · 6 years

Text

13x06 Coda: The One With the Couch

Claire is just as disgusted as I am about the bunker’s recliners. 1k rectifying that, partially based on @elizabethrobertajones‘s ongoing fight for a bunker couch.

“You met who now?”

Jody shifts her weight back and forth as she switches the phone to her left hand so she can better dry the dish Alex hands her with her right. Claire looks up from the cookie sheet she’s currently drying, a question in her eyes. Jody holds up a finger and nods at the telephone.

“You’ve got to be pulling my leg. You’re pulling my leg, right?”

Alex stops washing her dish, and Claire keeps drying the same portion of the cookie sheet over and over again. It’s not Jody’s oh no face, so it doesn’t look like anybody they know is dead.

“Sounds like a story that would be better told in person. Do you want to—no, yeah, I think the girls would be okay with that.” She lowers the phone from her ear for a moment. “Alex. You’re not working this Friday, are you?”

Alex shakes her head.

“Yeah, we should be good.”

“You never asked me if I was busy!” Claire protests.

Alex shoots her a smirk over Jody’s shoulder, which she ignores. Instead, she drops the cookie sheet on Jody’s island and resorts to crossing her arms. Jody doesn’t seem to notice.

“Well, it was good to hear from you, Dean. See you Friday.”

Claire considers inventing something going on in her life on Friday just to prove Jody wrong about her lack of a social life and/or job, but in the end, she winds up sitting shotgun in the truck anyway (after nearly breaking Alex’s arm in a thumb war to see who could sit there).

“They live in a what?” Patience demands, setting down the AP Calculus BC prep book down between her and Alex.

Despite the fact that she’s probably not going to get the college education she’d been gunning for all these years, she still insisted on studying for the test in a few weeks. Claire thought she was crazy. Jody just kept buying her prep books.

“Underground bunker,” Alex says, smiling.

She’d been far more—well, patient—with Patience than Claire had been able to be so far when it came to explaining the things Claire now saw as commonplace.

“Um. Why?”

Jody shrugs. “It’s fortified. And both of them are dead, legally speaking, so buying a house isn’t exactly an option.”

To her credit, Patience nods and goes back to her integrals. Alex leans over so the two can continue their miniature lesson. Claire at least waits to turn around before she rolls her eyes. Alex loves pretending they’re normal.

“Here we are,” Jody says after a few more minutes of driving.

“That looks super sketchy,” Patience says, but she gets out of the car anyway.

Jody goes to knock on the door, leaving Claire to grab the angel food cake that Jody had made before they left. By the time she catches up, the three men are standing in the doorway, welcoming them in.

“Donna beat you by a half hour,” Dean says, standing aside so the women can get in.

Claire sizes Castiel up. They’ve been texting on and off for a couple years now, but it’s been a while since she’s seen him in person. He looks pretty much the same—is that a new trench coat?–but then, she’s not sure what she expected.

“You look older,” Castiel notes.

Claire shoots him a grin. “You too, old man.”

To her surprise, Patience chooses to cling to her side rather than Alex’s as they make their way downstairs. Donna is sitting at the table, but she gets up when they all show up.

“We met Scooby Doo,” Dean says, and launches into a recounting of their adventure in TV land.

Their second, if Sam’s disgruntled chiming in is to believed. Which, okay. Claire has been in this hunting business since she was in pigtails, but even she has to admit that it’s pretty weird to hear that particular story.

Eventually, they make their way into the kitchen, where Dean already has dinner laid out. Sam takes an interest in Patience’s calculus and Jody and Donna dive into an animated conversation with Dean about the finer points of the Scooby case. That leaves Cas and Claire sitting awkwardly across from each other. Claire takes to scrolling through her phone.

“Hey, Cas. D’you mind getting the movie queued up?” Dean asks, bumping Castiel’s shoulder.

He shakes his head. “Of course not. Claire?”

She follows Cas into the last room she would have ever expected to see in the bunker.

“Oh, seriously? What is this, Friends?” Claire crosses her arms as she walks into the room. “What does he want us to do, set up folding chairs?”

Cas steps sideways, but not quickly enough to hide the handful of folding chairs leaning against the wall. Claire pinches her nose.

“Okay, no. If he wants to have a family dinner, he needs a family space. Do you still have that ugly truck?”

He looks as if he wants to defend it, but quickly decides to hold his tongue. Instead, both he and Claire make their way out to the garage.

“I don’t see what you’re—”

“We’re getting Dean a gift. Shut up and drive.”

Honestly. What sort of macho bullshit would lead a man planning to have a movie night in his brand new—had Cas called it the ‘Dean Cave?’ Really?—TV room to buy two freaking recliners instead of a couch?

“So. Syria?”

She’d spent about an hour stressing out about that particular text until Jody had caught wind of her worry and reassured her that, of all people, an angel would probably be fine there.

Castiel nods. “It’s a beautiful place. The little of it that is still standing, anyway. And beautiful people, too.”

Claire can’t help a small smile. Of course Castiel would be the one to notice those sorts of things. It was part of what allowed her to like him—hell, maybe even love him a little, and wouldn’t Jody be proud to know she was admitting something like that?—even when he had her father’s face.

“Here we are,” Castiel says dubiously as they pull up outside the furniture store.

Despite the fact that it’s 6:56 and the places closes at seven, Claire barges inside, Castiel on her heels. The spotty teen standing near the door looks as if he wants to hit them both over the head with lamp dressing the fake living room next to them.

“How fast can you move a couch, buddy?” Claire asks.

They make a decision incredibly quickly. Claire has been on enough shopping trips with Alex to know that she has to keep her eyes on the prize and drag Cas away from the other options.

“I think that would look good,” Castiel says of a plaid couch.

“They’ve gotten into your brain.”

Eventually, they settle on a plain black leather couch. Claire hands over the credit card that Jody gave her for emergencies and together with the teenager, they drag the couch out to the truck and make their way back.

Claire shoots Alex and—okay, fine—Patience a text, so they meet them in the garage. It only takes them about ten minutes to maneuver it in several pieces into the ‘Dean Cave.’ By the time Dean and the rest of the group enter the room, they have it set up.

“Huh,” Dean says, looking the room over.

Without another word, he flops down on the couch.

They all fit perfectly. Claire grabs the remote and turns on the TV. Mission accomplished.

(ao3)

#spn #spn spoilers #spn s13 #spn fic #claire novak #castiel

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youngerdrgrey · 7 years

Note

charlena + it wasn't supposed to be like this orrr any combo of chidi/eleanor/tahani/real!eleanor + riding unicorns sounds like a wonderful time... in theory.

a/n: going with option a + idk what time basketball games end bc I don’t pay enough attention + I apologize for the amount of Davis mentions in this

Davis gets his fifth ring. His ring, since it’s no longer an accomplishment that Charley gets to share with him. His, because he decided that being the team pimp was more important than the marriage that built him. His –

She hasn’t hiccuped since ring number two. Drunk off the most expensive champagne they could find and high off the rush of this actually happening again. They’d tucked Micah away with a sitter, and he’d spun her in his arms at a rooftop bar until the only thing that didn’t blur were his eyes. The only thing that made sense was him. Them. This.

She hiccups now. Her hand jumps to cover her mouth before another slips out, before she can draw any more attention to how drunk she is in public. Nova keeps staring at her, like she’s going to break, but she’s done breaking over Davis. She’s done letting the men in her life shatter her every time they decide that they want to be absolutely everything for someone else.

Only thing is, the camera keeps cutting to Davis and Micah, cheering and bouncing on the court. Micah’s only a head shorter than Davis now. His cheeks more narrow, and his temperament slowly turning into his father’s.

“I’ll be back.” Charley pushes off the couch. Hollywood opens his mouth to say something, but she shakes her head. “I’m fine. Really.” She grabs her phone as she heads out of the living room and straight on out of Vi’s house.

She has an interview scheduled for next week that’s supposed to talk about what it’s like being named one of the most influential women of the year. She’s got two hundred dollars on them asking her about Davis’ win now. Maybe they’ll phrase it nicely. Maybe they’ll wax poetically about the dreams she had for herself and her family before she started the mill. ‘They’re still coming true without you,’ the reporter will say, ‘Micah must be thrilled.’ And she’ll have to be gracious and supportive. She’ll have to smile and say that she’s happy that Davis accomplished what he’d set out to do, and that she hopes that he can continue to be a good father to Micah now that he has a bit more freedom in what he wants to do with his life. And they’ll stare at her face like her foundation’s set to crack. They’ll stare so hard she can’t stare back without un-focusing her contacts, and she really, really doesn’t want to do the interview anymore.

Her phone jumps in her hand. Micah probably. She flips it over.

From Lena Evans // 11:13 pm

She blinks. It must be the alcohol. Lena doesn’t text her, not anymore. But Charley opens the message anyway.

From Lena Evans // 11:13 pmLena: He really did itLena: And they said he needed Felix to do it

Felix left after a year in New Orleans. Lena left him not long after.

From Charley Bordelon // 11:14 pmCharley: Felix holds people back

From Lena Evans // 11:14 pmLena: So does DavisLena: His singer’s barely trending online

Charley snorts. His singer girlfriend who he dates for a few months before breaking it off so he can be with somebody else. This young girl who smiles at him like she’s going to do something Charley couldn’t. Even Micah feels bad for her. He comes home talking like, ‘It’s sad, Mom, and she keeps coming back to him. He’s not going to change.’ Davis just gets better at it.

From Charley Bordelon // 11:15 pmCharley: I don’t know if I want to talk about him

She really has spent enough of her life on him.

From Lena Evans // 11:15 pmLena: We don’t have toLena: But I would like to talk again

Charley settles on Violet’s porch swing.

From Charley Bordelon // 11:16 pmCharley: You would?

It comes off needy in text form. She wants to say it with a smirk like she used to. Maybe with her on one side of a tall table and Lena on the other. Charley could say it half to her champagne glass, but her eyes could be on Lena as she does it. When other people look down on her, Charley only shines brighter.

Charley: You could say you missed me.

There. That’s forward enough that she can achieve the same result. Trip Lena up on the other end. She still follows Lena on social media – Twitter, Instagram – and Lena’s doing better on the gram than anything else. She’s got the smile for it. Dazzling white teeth that stun Charley into submission. Eyes she can drown in.

From Lena Evans // 11:17 pmLena: What would I miss, Charley? We weren’t exactly close. Last time you saw me, you were threatening me.

Charley threatens everyone.

From Charley Bordelon // 11:18 pmCharley: If you didn’t like it, then why msg me

She should’ve spelled it out, but her phone screen doesn’t exactly stay in focus for long right now. Maybe they should talk on the phone instead. They haven’t talked in years. Nothing more than a well meaning like or retweet. A direct message in reply to Lena’s Instagram post to announce the divorce. Does she sound the same as she used to?

From Lena Evans // 11:19 pmLena: I don’t know

From Charley Bordelon // 11:19 pmCharley: you dk?

From Lena Evans // 11:21 pmLena: I still look for you on the sidelines sometimes, and I wake up on game days and get ready like the whole world’s gonna be watching me. I normally don’t even remember that I’ve got nowhere to be until I’ve got eyelashes in my hand.Lena: It’s dumb

Charley still watches post-game interviews, still had her March Madness bracket to go against Hollywood’s. It’s not dumb to miss it. It’s not ridiculous to resort to autopilot and expect things to still be good.

From Charley Bordelon // 11:22 pmCharley: It’s human

From Lena Evans // 11:22 pmLena: Well, we mere mortals feel like that every once in a while.

Charley scoffs.

From Charley Bordelon // 11:23 pmCharley: I feel tooCharley: You��ve seen it

Lena doesn’t respond though. There’s no typing bubbles, and Charley’s shown emotion to Lena before. Yes, she’s normally playing Lena when they interact, but that’s what Charley had to do back then. Lena tried using her just as much.

Lena propositioned Charley for that reality show, and she barely batted an eye at the concept that her husband could’ve actually been involved in what happened with Milena.

Charley calls her. The phone only rings twice before Lena answers, which gives Charley enough time to breathe before snapping. “Don’t even think of acting like I’m above emotion, okay? I feel. I hurt just as much as you do.”

“I never said you didn’t.”

“So the mere mortals comment wasn’t a crack at me?” Charley waits for a response that doesn’t come. “You want a punching bag, go somewhere else.”

“Wait!” Lena’s voice comes out harried. She gulps a little too close to her phone’s mic. “I…. Don’t you remember when we talked about this day? We said we’d rush the court, and all four of us would celebrate after. We’d go on a yacht for the day. We’d party like the boys never have to go back. We’d—“

“Be free.” Charley sinks so deep into the swing that it rocks. They were supposed to be a little unit then. “What did we say? Skinny dipping off the yacht?”

Lena laughs. “Go live on Periscope but tastefully film the whole thing.”

Charley laughs too. “I don’t know how we’d manage that.”

“We could figure it out.” A breath follows her words. Then, Lena clears her throat. “It wasn’t supposed to be like this. That’s all. And I do miss you, Charley.”

It might be the alcohol talking, or maybe her own loneliness. “Come visit?”

Another breath. “I’m actually… I’m staying at the W again. In the city.”

She’s in town. She’s close enough that they could be together in hours. But what would that look like? Would it be old friends catching up? More bottles and swapping stories about the husbands they left, or would it be more like, well, figuring out how to film on their own? Charley’s never — she was with Davis, then with Remy, and now, this would be something completely different. If Lena even wants it to be that way. She could be over her little crush by now.

Lena talks over the silence. “It wouldn’t have to be anything, if you’re not comfortable. I know that you’re not really —“

“I don’t know what I am.” Okay, that comes out sadder than Charley wants it to. More introspective and reflective. She’s never had the opportunity to really explore anything with a woman before. She’s not even one hundred percent sure she wants to explore with Lena. Sure, Lena is beautiful, and adoring, the sort of girl who would do anything Charley wanted without putting up much of a fight.

“I could help you figure it out. Maybe find some new dreams.”

It’s not the alcohol that makes her stomach flip. “Give me an hour.” Enough time to say goodnight to the family, order a ride since she can’t drive herself. “Wait for me?”

Lena sighs on her end. “Of course. Yes. Yeah, I’ll be here.“

#charlena #charley x lena #qs: fics #mine #filled #charley bordelon #lena evans #to post on ao3 #lesbiancleophas #answered #queen sugar

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survivor-guyana · 5 years

Text

Episode 3 - "I am like... a very good person." - Nikias

I forgot what i said last but this tribe swap was very good for me. I kept two allies Mitchell and Sarah. But also Aidan and Dani were in my “best fucking people ever” alliance so thats good. We have a fav Jenna with us. I dont want to lose but if we do its gunna hopefully be her. Im sorry but u guys are up by 2. 👀 keeping eye out for Jones and Tim.

I was honestly sad about the swap because i liked my tribe so much. However, im excited to see how this all plays out. It seems like we got active fans on our tribe so hopefully group challenges will work well!

TRIBE SWAP HAPPENED FUCK originally I was gonna sue the hosts,,, ORIGINALLY I was gonna file a restraining order,,,,, but,,, the more I thought about it,, and the more I talked with everyone on my "new tribe",,, I'm feeling okay? which is SHOCKINg for my standards let me elaborate,, I put "new tribe" in quotes because is it REALLY a new tribe when 5 of the 6 people are from the same original tribe? The tribe consists of myself, Nick, Tim, TJ, JD, and Nikias. Which is GREAT for me for a whole list of reasons... I don't think we'll lose as much because we have comp threats like JD and Nick on our team. If we DO lose, we have an easy boot in Nikias. And if we lose AGAIN, I'm in a 3 person majority with Nick and Tim (and maybe even TJ too) .So no matter how this swap ends up, I don't think I'll be the first person booted if we go to a tribal council at any point. which is GREAT. Actual now that I think about it, if we never go to tribal, that would be even more incredible. Because I think I'm doing a decent job at pulling Nikias onto my side. I don't think he's a bad person, and if we do lose, it would absolutely SUCK because he's really cool/could be a good ally down the road. actually now that I think about it,, I've talked more with Nikias in one night than I've talked to JD in a week? is that saying a lot? I think so. I ACTUALLY MESSAGED JD TOO and she was like "can I get back to you later? I'm busy" WHICH IS FINE and it's a lot better than leaving me on read BUT LIKE,,,, okay Jan. If I WERE to hypothetically go to tribal,,, I'd much rather see JD go than Nikias, but I'm not sure if I can help that? It really depends on what everyone else wants to do, because I don't really wanna stray away from the majority of the group at the first tribal I go to yk? Like,,, everyone on the tribe knows she's good in challenges, and if we ever LOSE a challenge, why get rid of the person who's best at challenges? IDK. hopefully we don't go to tribal at all? and I don't have to worry about losing ANYONE? that'd be great, thanks! god why couldn't i have been switched onto a tribe with Jose, thinking about this would've been WAY easier.

So the swap: I feel really good about the swap bc 4/6 people in it are in an alliance. First of all, I want to win the challenge. Second, if we don’t win the challenge, I’ve wanted Mitchell out for a while now and I think Jenna will vote anyone to save her ass. I just hope the others stick to our alliance. It would be completely idiotic for them not to bc we have the numbers already, but who knows

SO THIS REWARD CHALLENGE IS scary,,,,,, not because I think I'm gonna lose or anything,, but it's because I think I have an actually decent score? Idk what Obey the Game standards are, but I got to level 108. which SUCKs if it actually is a good score, because I'm not too sure if I want to win this challenge. I feel like i'm in somewhat of a good position right now, and I don't need the idea of having an idol clue putting a target on my back. I have other people on my tribe (and on other tribes) that would share their clues with me,, I don't need people to know that I have one. hopefully that makes sense Best case scenario: Nick/Tim win - and they share it with me either way Maybe Okay Scenario?: TJ/Nikias/I win - not sure if either TJ or Nikias would share it with me, and I don't want to the target on my back. Worst Case Scenario: JD wins. She won't share it with me. And she probably wouldn't say anything if she won lol. so lets LOSE THIS THING, BABY, WOOHOO

Tribe swap... Tribe swap... Tribe swap... Tribe swap... I still don't know how I'm personally doing in this game. This tribe swap is either going to make me or break me. There are four people from the other tribe and literally the ONE person I didn't want on my new tribe from my old tribe.. is honestly the ONE person I got stuck with. Is this some sick joke? Am I being Punk'd? Is this some sort of karma for being a bad human being from time-to-time? It's always hard to figure out what exactly my game plan is going forward. I'm honestly terrified of having a bad score and being voted out because I'm a weak-link. It's so much harder when you lose and there's only 5 other fucking options. I guess as of right now I'm trying to focus on making some social bonds. Sammy gave me that super idol so hopefully there is something there... Alyssa is basically me if I was 21, American, and like super pretty. Chelsea has some potential and José is a stoner like me? So I can work with this.. I just need them to want to work with me....

FUCK THIS PARANOIA OKAY I gotta give myself a lil more respect I've been freaking out for like,,,, 7 years now about who my "number one" should be - whether that be Sammy, Tim, Alyssa Nick TJ etc etc etksjadslfk the only person that can be my number one is me I can't keep looking out for every single person in this game - sure, it's nice to have people looking out for me, and I can always reciprocate it. But my top priority will always be the betterment of my game. I can't devote so much trust to so many people. If I had to rank the people in trust that I've met thus far (from most trustworthy to least), it would be Sammy > Tim > Alyssa > Nick > TJ > Nikias > JD > Jenna > Chelsea > Jose. So yeah. This is Guacamole Jones' Decree of Solitude: I will resort to writing down all of my info (so I never forget) I will be honest with the people that are honest with me. But I will not share this information with anyone, but myself. If anyone wants to open up to me, I will consider sharing a piece of my info but never the whole truth, and never anything more. I will share what is best for me. So I may receive the hypothetical One Million Dollars (- tax) Signed, (with love) Jones.

So I feel pretty great about my new tribe. 5 original favorites and only 1 fan. Nik got 2 votes last Tribal and seems to be on the outs with his old tribe. Furthermore he seems like a good dude who if I can protect may give me his full loyalty going forward. I also was lucky to swap with both Tim and Jonesy. I also have a deal with JD and TJ. So if we have to go to Tribal I’m not sure who is best for me to vote. I’ll likely let the rest of the group decide and play along. I am trending towards a leadership role, which is good for building a resume to win but with 18 ppl left it’s kind of early to be looking that far ahead. As of now it’s better to just stay under the radar and not make any waves.

Well, this swap was interesting. I reconnected with a great friend in Nikias and think I have a solid ally there moving forward. I’m glad I get the chance to build my relationship with Jones and Tim more, and I’m excited to learn more form Nick and JD. Overall, I’m very curious how this is going to go!

So how do i feel about my tribe swap? well in one word pretty weird.. The thing is that i am in a situation 5-1 which is pretty scary and it will be almost imposible to find cracks but on the other side i really like some people on this tribe. I feel like if i can make connections and play the card that i was on the bottom on the other tribe and that i hated my tribe, that could make them feel more secure with me. Its like i am in a bad position but it's a new begining in this game but i will just try to put myself in the best position possible. I am gonna try to be as carefull as i can be with my words and be better socially and work with people that are working together. But what is the best thing and the worst thing at the same time is that these 5 are strong competitors and i am like... a very good person. They can help me stay safe by winning immunity, but there is no doupt in my mind that i am gonna drag them down in the challenges and that's a really good argument of getting rid of me apart from being the only fan there.

ok soooo I have been talking with a bunch of peeps and I am trying to get a solid group that I can rely on. I am super tight with Jones and TJ and I have talked a lot. Also I am trying to get close with Alyssa. Anyways, I think I have covered my ground with the active people. Jenna is on and off a lot so I am not sure how well I can depend on her in the future but ya never know. I feel bad for the fans tribe too tbh bc like they really flopping lmaoooo. I hope there is a swap soon so that I can meet new people but also switch the game up a bit. ILL TALK TO YALL LATER

So I go to bed early, cus I'm super tired from the competition (no I will not stop bragging about it lol) and when I work up, we won the challenge but i have like... 3 less people on my team. No need idea what happened. But I like it..oops to the person I'd just made an alliance with who is now on a tribe alone.... Was that one in the Alliance? I'm gonna have to check that lol the host are amazing, you've all been so go to me while I've been super busy, sorry of rigging me an idol, and trust me... I asked :( they are to good lol

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I am a little it annoyed with how this game is going for myself, I am not sure if I want to trust Nick as much as I did before, we will see I suppose. But something that struck me funny is that out of 6 of us on this tribe 5 went to search the Rainforest, and I was the only one that went to search the mountains. Now, the only thing I can think of is that the clue had something to do with Water, close to it or around it or, like 'hey, dont get wet'. BECAUSE GUESS WHO FOUND THE IDOL? The one that didn't go to the rainforest, the one that didn't know anything about the clue! But I found it over by the stream on the mountain sooooo that is what I assume the clue said. Anyway, I'm feeling really on the out's and right now I am only really liking talking to Jones, I know its not just about liking to talk to people but you gonna have something to talk about right? *sigh* anyway, sad JD here, sitting on the outside of her tribe, but still bringing home the challenge cus I was the only one that did the rap part in the Riff-Off. I wish I could say like, Canadian gotta rep that Drake, but I dont know much of his shit but I love that part of the riff-off (sunglasses) (((( https://dumielauxepices.net/sites/default/files/sunglasses-emoji-clipart-oversized-784794-395105.jpg ))))

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(half of this is yawning)

So this Immunity challenge my team didn't work together very well. We picked IMO a hard song to build a theme and story with. In addition I was a very weak teammate this round. I had a bunch going on and didn't record any video. I tried to give input in ways we could be creative... but all in all I was one of the weakest links to the losing team. For that I am a little nervous. However I think I am in a good spot with Tim and Jonesy. I have shared my idol clue with them and am working on building a trusting relationship to help me get to the end. IN addition I've been having good one on one talks with JD, TJ, and Nikias. I don't think my name is coming up from any front as a result of the work I'm doing sharing info with them all and making them feel apart of my gameplay. TBH I don't know who to vote. I like Nik alot and I believe him when he says he is on the outs with his old tribe and I think if I saved him he would be in my pocket for the rest of the game... but I also think voting out a favorite could make me a target in a new swap to a group of favorites that want revenge. So, really no reason to make waves. Prob going to have to vote Nikias because it makes the most strategic sense.

Well that was a rough first week, back to back to back losses and tribal councils. Thankfully I wasn't among the first two leaving the game, but before we could even reconnect after Bee's departure, we were thrown into a swap unprepared. Desperately wishing that my alliance had planned for a swap this early, but we were all thinking it wouldn't be for another tribal or two. My tribe broken and divided, I was lucky to land in a tribe with a majority of fans, while three of my tribe mates were thrown to the wolves in the other two tribes. Im worried that our success in the last immunity challenge, will be the death of Nikias, as he's the only fan in his tribe.

Shit I almost forgot to confess!! Im so glad that my tribe consists of mostly OG favorites and one fan! Im also HAPPY that I got to swap with Nick and Jones. At this point she's my number 1 ally. Together we searched the idol system but found NOTHING I'm- .

We swapped this week and have 5fans/1fave AND we aren’t going to tribal this week. Life is good

Omg we swapped and I’m on my same tribe basically. 5/6 of us were originally on arakaka. But we finally aren’t going to tribal so thank god!! Judges were harsh though because we tried pretty hard okkk. Anyway I love the tribe still.HAPPY??

I think getting the numbers at the tribe switch is a blessing and a curse. I'm glad I'm with most of my "alliance" from the first tribe and definitely glad that I'm with Dani but I think it's going to give me this facade that I'm Arakaka strong until the end and I'm not sure. Playing in this new ORG environment where I don't really know anyone makes me feel like playing with no regrets. I don't owe any of these people anything and I trust absolutely none of them at this point...... I'm warming up to Mitchell more and more but I'm not sure how he fits in with the others. I do think he'll be loyal but who knows. I don't want to fry his chickens up in a Popeyes three piece just yet. As for Jenna... she's funny but bland with me? Maybe I need to try more but I'm threatened by her social game. But apparently she got 20th last time? I don't know how to feel about her. I think somebody on the ther tribe mentioned knowing her or being threatened by her. Maybe her scores were good? I have no idea but eh. At this point I just want to find a core three to move forward with but most of these people suck and I don't know if there already is one.

So I've been with my new tribe for about 3 days now and I honestly still don't 100% know how I feel about this whole tribe swap ordeal. I PERSONALLY like the people on my new tribe better. My new tribe members are more personable (with the exception of José) and I don't feel like I'm wasting their time by talking to them like I had previously felt on my old tribe. As of right now I do feel a tad bit more comfortable with Devon. He gave me his idol clue but I'm not too sure if he's just really trying to make me fall for this or not? Maybe he has already found the idol? WHO KNOWS? Alyssa is super fucking cool. We don't really talk about the game as much so that kind of scares me BUT there hasn't been a lot of game to talk as of yet? SO maybe that will change going forward (I hope so). Alyssa is someone I can see myself working tbh. Alyssa and Sammy are definitely the two from the old Horososo Tribe who have reached out to me the most. They are the social King and Queen of this tribe. CONFIRMED. Knocking on wood here.. BUT if we ever go to Tribal MAYBE just MAYBE they'll not vote out José and not me? Praying to Gaga.

I won reward which was the idol clue. It doesnt really help me much but it does say there are other items as well in the game. And we won immunity whichbis great. Im so happy not having to go to tribal.

moooood ok i don’t mind the swap bc everything’s going ok and im still not pming people meidgjskdkf but the comp went rly good!!! we came in second but i found out there’s three tribes so it’s ok! judges think there was literally too many ads and it wasn’t the challenge but have u ever seen a full video without ads on youtube lmao

So my file corrupted on my original video for the challenge but I was able to submit something thanks to Jonesy. We lost anyways lmao and it looks like the vote tonight will be Nikias. Sorry pal but the numbers are just there.

I’m going on a date tonight so I’m case I don’t get to submit a video tonight, I just want to be VERY clear: I fucking LOVE Jess and would DIE for her. F2 homie vibes

So pretty much, I've been pretty much invisible the entire week, and it's been great. I'm letting my tribe drag me for now, and personally, i think with how things are going, we're going to continue to win challenges, and I don't have to worry until I reach another swap, which at that point, personally, I'm just going to go all in and people are going to be like... where did this bitch come from? LMAO

I couldn't be more happy to be on the strongest tribe! Sammy and Alyssa are quite close, but they are also tight with Chelsea. That leaves 2 options: 1. Get them to vote out Jose, based on inactive attitudes. He won't supply them with any use later down the road. 2. Get Jose to draw rocks with myself and Jess, leaving the odds in a 1/4 against me going in rocks. I'm torn on what the best strategy is, but for now, I need to establish the best personal connections possible and hope our tribe secures immunity all the way into the next swap/an eventual merge.

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it's too late to come up with a jones pun, but,, JONES

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