#but now josh is working today instead and the coworker i have a crush on (we’ll call uhhhhh gerry) has taken his shift

[fingertipsmp3]

SOS two of my coworkers swapped shifts and now I’m worried tomorrow is going to be awkward and bad

[satans-helper]

Smother the Flame in Your Heart - Part XIX

Read previous parts here or read on Ao3 // Playlist

Pairing: Danny Wagner x Sam Kiszka

Word Count: ~4k

Warnings: Jake chapter ft. sexual fantasies, masturbation & vampire stuff ;)

Hi <3 I thought today was Friday. Happy early chapter ~

---

Sam trusted him. That declaration had shaken Jake to the core, though he hadn’t let it show. No, he kept that disruption to himself too, tucking it away so he could spend the rest of the evening with Sam and Josh too once that one came home. All seemed to be well. The worst had passed, they were all mending, and he really did hope Sam could rest easy now.

Jake couldn’t, though. He tossed and turned as he lay fitfully awake in bed, switching between staring at the slats of the blinds over the windows and the dark shapes of prints and photos on the walls. But what was really in the forefront of his vision was, of course, Danny.

Sam could trust him to not do anything. Jake would never. But he felt like he was breaking his brother’s trust just by thinking about Danny, which he did often. Almost constantly, really, and tonight was no exception. No matter how hard he tried to think of anything and anyone else, Jake’s imagination drifted back to Danny and it didn’t take long before he was growing hard beneath his flannel pajama pants.

“God. Stop it,” Jake hissed to himself, rolling over onto his stomach. He stuffed his hands beneath his pillow and buried his face against the fabric, groaning as he continued to try and block thoughts of Danny out of his head. But the jostling of his hips brushed his stiffening cock against the mattress and he instantly imagined he was lying on top of Danny, burying his face into long, soft curls that were as dark as the night around him instead of a pillow. 

He rolled back over to take away the pressure and stimulation, but again his dick stirred and stiffened more anyway. Danny was right there in his mind’s eye, tormenting him with his beauty and that darling smile that only fell away as those soft lips pressed against Jake’s own. 

No, Jake thought, turning onto his side and pulling the comforter up over half of his face. Not him. Instead, he tried to imagine someone else in Danny’s place–there was a girl at work that definitely had a little crush on him. She was sweet, helpful, pretty–not so unlike Danny at the surface level anyway, and he tried to picture her there, her rosy lips kissing him, her smaller, feminine hands on his body. 

But then Jake thought of sharp teeth and strong hands and firm muscles and his coworker was gone and Danny was back. This time, Danny was spooning him from behind and Jake swore he could almost feel it in real life–the weight of Danny’s arm sliding over his chest, the heat of his groin pressed against Jake’s ass, the slide of Danny’s calf over his shin. It felt so good to be held, to feel all that warmth and weight against him, keeping him secure, making him feel loved. It had been a long time since Jake felt so much affection and desire for someone, and perhaps even longer since it’d been mutual. What a rare, beautiful thing it was for love to be reciprocated.

His eyes flew open when he thought that, and a sharp pain in his chest suddenly aggravated him. Danny didn’t even like Jake like that; he certainly didn’t love him. Jake knew he wasn’t even in love with Danny either but how long until that happened? As long as Sam was with Danny, Jake would keep spending time with him, getting to know him, falling further and further down the rabbit hole. Unless there really was something about Danny that he wouldn’t like. But even that was too small. There would have to be a part, or even multiple parts, of Danny that Jake would be repulsed by to not want him any longer.

Right now, trapped in clothing and blankets and darkness, Jake felt entirely the opposite of repulsed and only a few more minutes of agony passed before he gave up. He shifted onto his back and kept his eyes closed, maintaining yet another fantasy of Danny in the privacy of his mind. 

After he shoved his hand down his pants and began to jerk himself off, legs splayed and back already arching, Jake imagined him straddling Danny’s hips. He grunted as he imagined their cocks sliding together and Danny’s hand sliding between them to wrap around both shafts; Jake whimpered at the thought of how warm and silky Danny’s cock would feel against his own and the look of pleasure that would be on Danny’s face.

He almost started to go soft when he realized where they were in this fantasy–in his own bedroom. His breath hitched, he tried to put them somewhere else, but his hand was still moving as quickly as his mind and the fantasy was unraveling too vividly to dismantle it. In real life, he bit his lip to choke back the noises that wanted to erupt as his fantasy self pressed his hand over Danny’s mouth to keep him quiet. And Danny’s muffled moan warmed Jake’s palm as his hips rocked back and forth on top, grinding their erections together, while Danny’s hands both landed on his ass and squeezed in encouragement. 

In this fantasy, just one of many, Danny’s hand taking Jake’s cock and stroking him as he pulled him down to kiss sent his head spinning in real life. When sharp fangs sank into his bottom lip and warm blood pooled into both of their mouths, then Danny’s tongue swiped over Jake’s tender, wounded skin, the blackness behind his eyes fizzed and sparked. 

That same energy shot down his spine–Jake’s hips stuttered at the same time as his breath, his heart a wild frenzy in his chest. He had to bite down on his lip again himself, so hard it hurt and the pain only made his orgasm more intense because it slightly mirrored when he was sure his fantasy self felt; he shot his load into his fist and the inside of his pajama pants like a helpless teenager, and he felt the same as he started to come down. Too quickly the pleasure faded away and reality sank in again, leaving Jake panting alone in the darkness, wishing things were different.

-

Jake didn’t feel any better in the morning. It was raining again and the constant dreariness and humidity made the day drag on and on, seemingly endless. His coworker wasn’t a distraction–no, she just made him think of Danny even more. He couldn’t think of anyone at all but Danny. It was getting worse and he didn’t know what to do.

Back home, he lingered solemnly in the kitchen as Josh prepared dinner. All three of them liked to cook but Jake had noticed that Josh had been doing it more often, and with a few new recipes, throughout this whole mess. It was his own way of trying to help out, Jake thought, and that made him feel worse. 

Sam wasn’t home yet and Jake assumed it was going to stay that way for most of the night, and Josh was busying himself with slicing and chopping vegetables, chattering about some new art exhibition in Detroit that he wanted to check out. Jake wished he could focus on his twin’s excitement more, but hearing “Detroit” just made him think of Danny again. Was Danny nervous when they’d all gone there for Sam’s birthday, edgier than usual not only because of the proximity to the twins but because he might run into someone he knew? Or did he never get his fix in the big city? 

Jake pondered this more and more, dazed as he sat at the kitchen table, until another slide of the knife against the cutting board took him out of his thoughts. 

“So what do you think?” Josh asked as if Jake had been hearing every word. He grabbed a white onion and began peeling the skin off, watching his own hands word as Jake did the same, trying to discern what had been asked.

“Sorry,” Jake said, tapping his fingers against the table. “What’d you ask me?”

“Next weekend we could all go,” Josh said, flicking his eyes over to his twin for a moment. “Unless you’ve got other plans?”

Jake gave it a second of consideration, then he sighed and said, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

Josh sighed and tilted his head back, staring up at the ceiling. “Come on, Jake. You and Sam just had your little pow-wow.”

“Yeah. But I still don’t think it’s a good idea.” Jake looked out the window into the backyard, gazing at the trees awash in evening light. “I don’t know if I should be around Danny.” Josh looked at him with ferocity and impatience, so Jake continued before his thoughts could be derailed: “‘Crush’ doesn’t even begin to cover it, Josh. I can’t–” Jake huffed and rested his head in his hand, closing his eyes so he didn’t have to face any visual scrutiny. “I can’t stop thinking about him. I don’t wanna make him uncomfortable, or Sam, or myself, because I’m already uncomfortable enough all the damn time.”

There was a significant bout of silence. When Jake looked up, Josh was moving across the kitchen and sitting down across from him. “That’s why I think this could be good. The more time you spend with Danny, the more you might find that those feelings will fade. Everyone has flaws, Jake.” Josh gave a little smirk. “Even hot vampires.”

“I know he’s not perfect. You can still have feelings for someone even knowing they’re flawed.” With that, Jake looked away again, back outside so he didn’t have to see Josh’s face as the next words came. But nothing except silence followed, so Jake looked at his twin again with melancholy dragging his face down. “What?”

Josh exhaled deeply and leaned back in his chair, surveying Jake for a second before he asked, “What do you think would help? Realistically.”

Anything was realistic to Jake now that he knew vampires existed in the first place. “I think experiencing Danny for myself would help. I could see if it’s, I don’t know, all it’s cracked up to be in my head.”

All of the empathy and patience in Josh’s face drained and were quickly replaced by harsh judgment–not something he often displayed. “How could you say that? And how is that realistic at all?”

“I said it because you asked me,” Jake retorted, irritation and betrayal at his twin’s judgment overshadowing his prior passive blues. “And I think it’s realistic. There’s always a chance that something could happen.”

“Sure, we can talk philosophy all night. But what do you think would happen with you and Sam if you did that?”

“I wouldn’t do it without Sam’s permission.”

Josh shook his head with his eyes shut, pinching between his brows. He let out a rough breath of exasperation, then he started to laugh. “Fucking hell, Jakey. Can you imagine asking Sam that? He’d tear you to pieces.”

“I know, man. But I’m getting to the point of being very willing to ask him anyway,” Jake admitted. “Nothing, y’know, intimate. Just–just one bite. Just to know what it feels like.”

Josh spared his twin a look of pity that Jake would have been insulted by if he didn’t need it so much. Then he stood up and went back to the counter to finish off the onion. “I think that might be even more intimate for them, dear brother, and if you ever ask, you’re going to face a wrath so mighty that no one will be able to save you.”

-

A few more days passed, innumerable fantasies passed in turn, and Jake decided that risking the wrath of Sam was worth it if there was any chance at all he’d finally get some relief. 

He felt like he’d developed the heart rate of a rabbit as they spent what should have been a laidback and fun Saturday afternoon together, mostly spent jamming out together in the garage. Danny was a natural on any instrument but he’d been taking advantage of the drum kit most of the day, and Jake felt tortured as he kept looking at the muscles in his arms becoming more and more pronounced with each movement; Sam actually seem incredibly subdued, hyper-focused on his bass, and Jake did feel a little better–and a little braver–once he got into his own groove, finally losing himself a bit in the music and camaraderie. 

He was glad that Josh was busy elsewhere. Normally having his twin around gave Jake 

more confidence and security, but today he felt like he’d chicken out if Josh were around. He needed to ask this today. He’d face the consequences alone.

Premature adrenaline was pumping through Jake’s body as they all took a break in the kitchen with some beers. His mouth and throat were dry and not even the beer soothed him–he drank two thirds of it in seconds, repeatedly crinkling the can and popping it back out as his eyes darted around the room and he tried to plan out how to ask. The few minutes felt like agonizing hours, and eventually Jake just blurted, “I know I run the risk of being murdered in my own home, but I have a favor to ask of both of you.”

Sam and Danny both looked at him quizzically. Jake was leaning against the fridge; Sam and Danny were at the table across from him, leaving just a few feet and just maybe one second of time if Sam were to lunge. How embarrassing that would be, Jake thought, for them to get into a brawl over another person. That had never happened before. They were too old to have that happen. But he knew that happening was far more likely than what he actually wanted to happen.

Sam was first to break the tension, undoubtedly knowing it was more of a favor from him Jake was asking. “What?”

“I know it’s not my place. I know it’s so wrong for asking and you have to believe me when I tell you that I feel awful for even thinking about it,” Jake began, trembling against the fridge, his gaze switching from Sam to Danny and then back again. “But I can’t stop thinking about this–about Danny–” At that, Sam’s shoulders tightened and his eyes burned into Jake’s own; Danny just looked more shocked than anything, his eyes wide and never moving from Jake’s face. Jake took a breath and went on: “And I think all of this could be over if I just know what it feels like. Just once.”

The pure malice in Sam’s eyes made the adrenaline in Jake’s body pump harder–his mind wanted him to flee, but his feet felt like they were stuck in invisible quicksand. He was sinking deeper and deeper into his own shame, the inevitable terror of Sam, and the horror that he was sure Danny felt. 

“You want Danny to do what exactly?” Sam asked, his voice tight and barely above a whisper. That was even more terrifying to Jake than him becoming his usual emotional tornado.

Thankfully, Danny answered for him. “You want me to bite you? To–to drink from you?”

Jake nodded. “I know it’s selfish. But I need something to like, break this fucking spell.” His words and tone captured the desperation he felt; it wasn’t manipulative, he was just defeated. He didn’t expect it to make sense or for either of them to comply. But he had to try anyway.

More silence and more tension filled the room for a minute before Sam suddenly stood up, nearly knocking his chair to the floor, and grabbed Danny’s wrist. “I gotta talk to you,” he said, then peered at Jake without saying anything to him. Danny staggered along behind his racing boyfriend and Jake watched, pressing himself up against the fridge as they passed so neither of them had to touch him.

He finished his beer as he waited, unable to hear what was being said in the living room–partly because of the blood rushing into his ears, partly because of how surprisingly soft the other two must have been speaking. Then Jake opened another one and drank half of it before only Sam returned, pausing in the doorway mere inches away from his frozen body.

“There are rules,” Sam told him, hands pressing into either side of the doorframe, blocking the way. 

Jake’s jaw dropped. “Are you–you’re serious?”

Sam’s jaw looked tight as he gave a single, shallow nod. “Rule one: wrist only. Danny bites you on the wrist, nowhere else. Rule two: you don’t touch him. Ever. Anywhere.” Dark eyes blazed into Jake’s when he said that; Jake nodded in return. “Rule three: you don’t ask for this or anything else ever again.” Sam dropped one arm to his side and exhaled, then stuck his hand in his pocket and pulled out his phone. “Last rule is, you get four minutes and I’m starting the timer now.”

“What–” Jake began to ask, not even sure what was going to come out his mouth next, but Sam stepped aside and showed him the clock already counting down. Confused, excited and scared, Jake swept into the living room to find Danny sitting on the couch looking anything but relaxed. Still, he patted the space next to him and Jake wasted no time. He sat down, making sure to steer clear of even their thighs brushing against one another’s, and waited for Danny to say something.

“Well. We finally get to test the taste theory,” Danny said with an audibly nervous laugh. Jake reciprocated the sound but all he felt was bewildered. Nevertheless, when Danny took his hand and then cradled his wrist, warm, rich desire swirled in his heart past the disbelief. Danny ran his fingers over the underside of his wrist, tracing the veins, and Jake felt faint even before any blood loss. “Maple syrup, right?” Danny added with a slight chuckle, meeting Jake’s gaze.

Jake nodded. “Yeah. Um, yeah, maybe?” 

Danny turned his body a bit, angling himself so Jake’s arm wasn’t being twisted awkwardly. “This is going to hurt, you know,” he said, and Jake nodded again. He wanted the pain. He wanted every sensation that came with whatever this unnatural, bizarre act was. He watched, mesmerized and frozen again, as Danny brought his wrist up to his mouth–although there was no other touching, no kissing, no sexy words, it was better than any fantasy Jake had ever had. It was real. 

His breath caught in his throat as Danny’s lips pressed against his skin; a shocked whimper shot through his chest when those lips parted and those teeth, very much sharper than Jake had even imagined, pierced him and sank into his flesh. Jake’s whole body tensed with the searing pain, beginning so localized but quickly coursing through more than just his arm. Danny’s body appeared to relax, though only momentarily–he sagged into the couch for a second before he suddenly sat up straight and pulled Jake’s arm closer, locking his mouth against his wrist while he sucked and his tongue flicked gently over the wound.

Jake wished Danny was looking back at him, looking into his eyes, but Danny’s eyes were closed. Whether it was because he was so focused, or because he was so enthralled, or just because he didn’t want to look at him, Jake didn’t know–but Jake kept his eyes locked on Danny, studying the furrowed brow, the waves of long, dark lashes and the nearly imperceptible movements of his face as the pain dissipated little by little. 

The pain had been a shock to his system, but it steadily drifting away made room for what Jake had feared perhaps more than anything–arousal. His cock stirred and stiffened beneath his pants, an ache grew in his belly, and it took every ounce of willpower to not break Sam’s second rule. 

Danny slowly pulled himself away; Jake watched the blood drip from the mouth-shaped wound, the teeth imprints obvious, the fang punctures weeping red, a bruise already forming where Danny’s lips had been. His thighs locked and he gripped the edge of the couch with his free hand as Danny licked up the mess, then Jake felt dizzy when he saw the wound close and the bite mark disappear. The blooming bruise remained though, lavender and pink and so tender as Danny traced his fingers down soothingly. 

Jake was still wordless and breathless when Danny turned his hand over and kissed the back of it, lips brushing over his knuckles–it was so brief and soft that it could barely be felt, but Jake did feel it. He felt the tenderness of that even more than he felt the throbbing discomfort in his wrist and arm.

“Are you okay?” Danny asked, finally making eye contact.

“Yeah. Yes,” Jake answered, taking his wrist back and looking down at it for a second. Then he found Danny’s beautiful, surprisingly calm face again. “I don’t–I don’t know what to say. Thank you.”

Danny smiled. “You’re welcome.” He averted his eyes for a second as he added, “You do taste good, Jake.”

Jake exhaled. “You think so?”

“Yeah. A little like maple syrup. I was right.” Sam’s phone timer went off in the other room and Danny stood up, extending his hand down to Jake. “Good timing.”

Jake stared at that outstretched hand for a second. “You go,” he said, looking up at Danny’s flushed cheeks. “I just need a minute. I’m sure Sam wants to check in with you anyway.”

Once Danny was out of the room, Jake was sure he could just touch himself once and he’d come in his pants. It was an option–but a bad one. He was still confused and needing answers as to why Sam allowed this to happen so, after another few seconds of ignoring his hard-on and staring at his wrist, he forced himself to get up and meander back into the kitchen. 

But when he got there, he was alone, and he could see Sam and Danny just outside on the deck. They didn’t notice he was there. Jake observed, standing in front of the sink and in front of the open window, watching and listening. 

Danny was hugging Sam tight and Sam was holding him fiercely, those long arms like a vice around Danny’s entire torso. Danny pet Sam’s hair and cradled the back of his head; Sam’s chin rested on his shoulder and both of their faces were nearly invisible past their hair and the closeness of their bodies, but Jake heard every word that was exchanged.

“That was really nice of you, Sammy. So generous,” Danny said, rubbing Sam’s back. “You didn’t have to do that but you did because you’re a good brother.”

Sam’s hands clutched at the back of Danny’s shirt. “Am I still the best you’ve ever had?”

Jake’s chest tightened as he watched Danny pull back just enough to clasp Sam’s face and kiss his forehead. “Always, baby,” he said softly, the words drifting into Jake’s ears with the breeze through the screen. “You’re my most favorite person in the world. I don’t ever want anyone else but you.”

Sam nodded, staring into Danny’s eyes, then kissed him. Jake felt all the heat and lust plunge out of his body, quickly replaced by a profound sadness that yanked on his heart.

But as he continued watching, there was another feeling there too, the one that he’d been chasing for so long–relief. It was strange and bittersweet but still so clear–Danny really, truly, wholeheartedly loved Sam. He’d never love Jake like that, nor anyone else. Watching the two of them and listening made Jake sure of that. And as much as it hurt, it was alright. It felt like that was how it was meant to be.

---

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[fangirlovestuff]

Cycle - Steve Rogers x reader ch.3

previously: ch.1 ch.2

Summary: You go out with Bucky and some other friends from work. There you meet one very handsome captain, but he has a very odd way of flirting. Or maybe, he just doesn’t know how to?

Word count: ~2,370

Warnings: explicit language, mentions of sex, one guy who’s being a jerk

a/n - Hey lovely people! i’m finally back with another update for this series, and you finally get to meet Steve! I hope you all like it and as always, comments/reblogs are deeply appreciated. awesome divider is by @whimsicalrogers​ and as always, italics are for thoughts. Enjoy<3  

You looked down at your phone to check the address Bucky gave you one more, and then let your gaze roam over the entrance to the club. You had no idea how he got your phone number, and you didn't really want to know. Maybe it's on the corporate… something or whatever, you calmed yourself and entered the club.

You were fashionably late, although not entirely on purpose… what? When you go out with the Avengers, you gotta put your best foot forward!

When you entered the club, your eyes needed a moment to adjust to the low lighting. Once you did, you spotted Bucky, Steve, Sam and a few more people from work. Fortunately, there was even one lab tech you recognized from today, at the sight of whom you let out a sigh of relief, inaudible over the loud music. You made your way to the table, willing your legs not to trip and embarrass you.

You made it to the table alright, and Bucky spotted you first, getting up to greet you. There was an awkward moment, both of you unsure whether to go for a hug or a handshake, but Bucky decided to just wrap his arm around you in a friendly hug so you went with it. You waved at everyone else and smiled at David, the lab tech you recognized. Your gaze wandered around the table, taking in everyone who was sitting there, either smiling at you or talking between themselves.

"Hey," you felt a gentle tap on your shoulder, turning your head to look at Bucky, who was sitting to your right. "Nice turnout, right?"

"Yeah," you said, genuinely impressed. "Thanks for inviting me," you smiled at him.

"Sure thing," Bucky said, and then louder, to the entire table he said, "Any of you wanna dance?"

Most of you got up, going after Bucky to the dance floor, including yourself. Steve stayed behind at the table, but you didn't think much of it. You danced with them for a while, letting loose a little and making conversation, as much as possible, with your coworkers. It was nothing like you'd ever done, clubbing with the people you worked with, but you assumed it would keep you from going home with some random guy, and so far it was working.

You were dancing with Sam, laughing as you locked eyes with a guy from across the room, and shit, maybe I spoke too soon.

Sam noticed you looking at the guy and smirked. "Go talk to him," he told you over the music, laughing as you averted your eyes bashfully, "go! Don't let me hold you back," he repeated, smiling.

"I'd like to see you try," you replied with newfound courage, going up towards the guy.

Sam nudged Bucky to get his attention, pointing to you and the guy you were walking towards. "Suck it Barnes!" he said over the music and Bucky frowned a little but shrugged eventually.

"Week's not over yet!" he replied, going back to dancing with some girl or another.

Meanwhile, you were talking to the guy, whose name you learned was Josh, which really should've been a sign, because after a while he asked, "Wanna get out of here?"

And obviously, you said no, the whole "not sleeping around" thing even more prominent in your mind as you were out with the people you worked with, and oh my god what would they think?

"C'mon baby, don't be like that," he growled, grabbing tighter onto your hips. You broke free of his grip, grimacing.

"I said no, have a great night," you said through your teeth, turning to walk away.

"It won’t be great without you," he said, gripping onto your wrist to stop you. He stepped closer, wrapping his arm around your shoulders. "Stop teasing and let's get outta here, alright?"

"No," you said, fighting to keep your cool.

"Bitch," he spat out, tightening his grip on your arm. "Leading me on like that is such a fucking—"

You couldn't believe what your ears were hearing. "Excuse me?" you said, your anger showing now, "I dance with you for twenty minutes and you think you're entitled to something?"

Your words shocked him enough to let go of you and you huffed, turning around and walking back to your table, ordering a drink on your way there. You plopped down in a seat that was coincidently next to one very handsome captain.

A little confession time – you had always kind of had a crush on this man. He seemed like he cared about saving the world, which, you know, is great considering his profession. But it was more than that, he seemed like he would care about the people he loved more than anything. Well, that was just a guess, you didn't really know the guy.

Who are you kidding, there was only one thing you definitively knew about him – he was super hot. Mega hot. Like, a make-you-stop-dead-in-your-tracks-and-gape kinda hot. With these broad shoulders, baby blue eyes, bulging muscles and America's Ass, it would be outright crazy to think he wasn't. And well, you were a lot of things, but crazy wasn't one of them. Also, not blind.

As you were sitting there, contemplating whether to say anything, you saw a pretty brunette come up to your table, putting her palms on the table and leaning down in a way that made her cleavage show very prominently. You weren't gonna lie, it was a very impressive cleavage. But Steve seemed almost unfazed, only lifting his eyes and focusing on her after a couple of seconds, when he realized she didn't leave.

For a man with super… everything, that's a pretty high response time.

"Hey," the girl said, clearly at Steve, "my friends ditched," she pouted slightly, accentuating her bold red bottom lip. "So I was wondering if you’d like to keep me company instead," she bit her lip slightly and smiled.

At that Steve suddenly broke from his reverie, patting the place beside him. You were just about ready to leave the two alone to do their thing, but then you heard what Steve told her.

"What's your name?" he asked, tilting his head a bit.

"Kendra," she said, leaning in towards him.

"Why'd your friends ditch you, Kendra?" he asked. The weird thing was, it seemed to you like he was actually concerned.

"It doesn't matter," she said, "because now I have you," she rested her hand on his bicep and smiled once more, leaning towards him even more. At this point, if she leaned any further, you were pretty sure her boobs were going to end up in his face.

Steve was seemingly unaffected. "Oh come on," he smiled a little sadly, "I'm sure that's not a great feeling to have. You can tell me, it's okay."

Kendra looked puzzled for a moment before Steve put his palm on her knee. She seemed reassured. You, on the other hand, were not. What the fuck kinda weird move is that?

"Well, I guess they just went home while I was in the bathroom or something," she shrugged, frowning a little.

"They probably aren't that good of friends if they just forget you here like that. I'm sorry," Steve said sympathetically.

"They didn't forget me," Kendra said, smiling, "they just…" she trailed off, thinking it over and then letting out a bitter chuckle. "Well, forgot me," she told Steve. "I guess I didn't see it that way, but I should probably find some better friends, right? I mean, this isn't the first time they do this, and – I'm sorry, you probably don't want to hear this right now," she smiled apologetically.

"It's okay," Steve insisted, "I do wanna hear you," he smiled.

After hesitating for a few seconds, Kendra continued. "Well, they always forget to invite me to stuff, or maybe they intentionally don't, I don't know anymore. And there's just that feeling about it like when they pick groups for PE and you're the last one to be chosen," she sighs, smiling bitterly. "Whenever I'm with them it feels like they don't want me there. But I'm probably just being paranoid, right?"

"My opinion? It doesn't matter," Steve answers. "Even if they only make you feel like this and aren't really thinking that, they're still not great friends," he suggested.

"I guess you're right," Kendra said, her face falling a little at the prospect.

After a bit, Steve talked once more. "So, you wanna go dance?" he asked, a hopeful smile creeping onto his face.

"Actually, I think I'd rather go home, but thanks for everything," Kendra said. She hugged Steve and left, his smile reduced to a sigh and a clenched jaw.

All the while, you sat there, internally battling whether you should go or stay, but the conversation was just too interesting for you to pass on. Eventually, you spoke up, feeling bad for him yet still confused about… whatever that was.

"I'm sure a hundred girls come up to you whenever you go out in public, so, you know, she isn't the only one out there," you said, seeing as he still looked down.

He looked up at you, startled by your words. "You were here the entire time?" he asked, his eyes narrowing. You nodded and averted your eyes away from his, realizing how bad that sounded. "It's fine," he chuckled, making you look back at him. "But she wasn't the first one that walked away like this, and she's probably not gonna be the last," he sighed.

"Hey, if it makes you feel any better, we all have bad luck sometimes. That's just human."

"You sound like you're talking from experience," he chuckled.

You huffed. "No shit."

Steve chuckled. "I'm Steve," he introduced himself.

"I know," you said with a smile and told him your name in return, introducing yourself.

"So, humor me – you really think a guy like me could find someone, huh?" Steve asked.

"Of course you can, you're Captain America! If you put your mind to it a little, girls are gonna be lining up left and right. In fact, I'm sure they already are," you said.

"Ah, see, that's the problem – what you just unfortunately witnessed was me making an effort, and you saw how well that ended," Steve said, smiling bitterly.

"C'mon, that's…" you trailed off and Steve raised his eyebrows at you, a small smile on his face.

"Look, I can’t tell you that was the best flirting game I've seen, but it's impressive anyways," you smiled. "That girl just confessed to you about a major problem she has, not any guy can do that. No guy is ever interested," you added under your breath.

Super-soldier hearing and all, Steve still caught that. "What do you mean no guy is ever interested? That's just basic manners."

"Well, I hate to break it to you America's sweetheart, but most guys don't really care about basic decency, let alone if it's to girls they meet in clubs. They get their fair share of R-rated fun and that's it. And yes, that is from experience," you added before he could ask.

Steve frowned. "Then that's what you're used to? Guys who don't care?"

"I guess so," you said, raising your eyebrows as if to indicate there's nothing that can be done about it.

"That sucks," he said, resting his arm on yours.

"Wait a second," you suddenly said, "is this your super-power or something?"

"What?" Steve asked, confused.

"Do you have like, a mojo or something? Why would I have just told you that?" you smiled.

Steve just looked at you, waiting for you to explain further.

"Okay, I don't mean that seriously, but look – that girl Kendra just told you about her issues, and so did I. I'm just saying, not everyone can get that kind of… emotional connection. People trust you, Steve. Sometimes I wish I had that kind of ability," you said, genuinely surprised at the amount of things you just shared with him, and how effortless it was to open up to him.

"I guess that's one way to look at it," Steve said, giving you a small smile, "but sometimes I wish I knew how to flirt. You can't always get what you want," he shrugged.

"Maybe in this case you can, you're not a lost cause yet," you smirked.

"Why, would you suggest giving me lessons in flirting?" Steve chuckled.

"Why not? Flirting 101 – if I were trying to flirt with you right now, you know what I'd say? Ask me the same question."

"Why, would you suggest giving me lessons in flirting?" Steve rolled his eyes, indicating for you to continue.

"If it means I can see you one on one again, sure," you said, winking, and Steve and you burst into laughter.

"Okay, that was a good one," Steve said once your laughter died down.

You both went to get more drinks, talking a little more about less serious stuff for now. "To better luck," you said, smiling at Steve, and you clinked your glasses together.

On the dance floor, Bucky was smirking at Sam, who was staring at him, unimpressed.

"Shut up," Sam said.

"I never said anything!" Bucky said and raised his hands up in mock surrender. "I'm just saying, ten bucks isn't that much money, buddy. Cheer up," he slapped his palm on Sam's shoulder.

"Relax, Barnes, it hasn't been a week yet. Don't jump the gun."

"Oh, you know I like guns, but I don't like them that much. C'mon, don't take this too seriously."

"If I have to hand out my money, I'd just hate to waste it on you," Sam chuckled.

"Whatever," Bucky rolled his eyes. "Honestly, we should just be happy for Steve."

"I'm sensing there's a but there."

"But it's way more fun to watch him get repeatedly friendzoned," Bucky chuckled and so did Sam.

From across the bar, Steve and you were still talking, exchanging stories about failed dates and successful ones. That night, neither of you thought about each other as potentially more than friends, not in the moment anyway. It was easy, simple. You were friends, nothing more. Right?

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Cycle Taglist: @dee-vn @alex747

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[inawickedlittletown]

I’m With You (15/?)

Summary:

Having a crush was nothing to be ashamed of…lying to the family and friends of said crush about being the guy’s boyfriend, that was a whole other problem. When Buck saves the life of Andrew Diaz and accidentally makes a nurse think that he’s Andrew’s boyfriend, Buck soon finds himself lying to Andrew’s firefighter friends/coworkers as well as Andrew’s family including Andrew’s very suspicious and attractive brother, Eddie.

Based on the 1995 movie While You Were Sleeping.

Words: 3,384

Notes: This chapter was originally over 6k long, so during editing when I found a particularly good stopping point I decided to cut it into two. That also meant that i could post this today and not once I finish editing the rest of what used to be this chapter. So, here we are. Enjoy.  

Read on Ao3

Masterpost

Previous Chapter

–

The first person to call Buck’s new phone was Hen and he agreed to meet with her for coffee after he left the hospital because she insisted that they go and because Chimney had overheard the conversation on her end, he invited himself too. For good measure, Buck had gone ahead and invited Josh along. 

“I just wanted to see how you were doing,” Hen said. “Christopher getting hurt on your watch must have felt horrible.” 

“It did,” Buck admitted. And it was still bothering him a little. He knew logically it wasn’t his fault, but Christopher had been crying and whimpering in pain and Buck should have been able to protect him from it. Seeing him and how well he was handling his healing wrist had made Buck feel a little better. 

“What happened?” Josh asked. 

Buck explained with Hen piping in. 

“It was just a sprained wrist,” Chimney said. “Very minor, right Hen?” 

She nodded. “And things like that can happen at any time, especially with kids with CP. It’s really not your fault, Buck.” 

“I know,” Buck said. Eddie didn’t even blame him for it. “It still sucked.” 

Hen pat his hand on the table. “I know. I remember the first time Denny got hurt — I don’t know who was crying more, Denny or Karen.” 

Chimney and Buck grinned at each other and Josh laughed. Some of the weight from what happened to Christopher fell away as Hen started asking Josh questions about dispatch and Josh had plenty of stories. 

Eventually, the topic switched over to Andrew. 

“I stopped by last night,” Josh said. “He’s getting discharged tomorrow, right?” 

Buck nodded. He didn’t want to think about it too much. When Eddie had told him while they were visiting Andrew, Buck had tried not to show how panicked it made him to hear it. It was just that so far things had been a little strange. Andrew had to know Buck wasn’t his boyfriend...or if he didn’t know, he likely suspected something, and yet he wasn’t questioning anything and instead acting like Buck was his boyfriend. It was strange. 

Josh met his eyes and there was a question there about what was happening that Buck couldn’t answer.

“That’s good, then,” Josh said. “He’ll be back to normal in no time.” 

“Yeah,” Buck said. Everything would go back to normal. Including how much Buck didn’t belong. 

“We should throw him a welcome party,” Hen said. “I don’t want to overstep, Buck, but it’d be nice to get everyone together to welcome him home. Think it’s alright to do at his place?”

Chim looked like he was having too much fun with that going by the way he wiggled his eyebrows at Buck. Josh coughed to hide his amusement and it was lucky that Hen didn’t realize what they were on about. 

“Uh, that sounds like a good idea,” Buck said. 

“Good, good,” Hen said and then she started to plan. 

“She loves a good welcome back party,” Chimney explained. “In our line of work there’s always someone out for an injury. And I’m sure we’ll have another party when he gets back to work.” 

Hen nodded with a small smile. 

Buck was struck yet again by how much love there was among these people whose lives he’d shoved himself into. Something about it must have shown on his face because Josh nudged him. 

“Okay?” he mouthed at him. 

Buck nodded. Hen was talking about picking up a cake and Chimney was texting and presumably inviting anyone that should be at a welcome home party for Andrew. 

“Eddie says he won’t be discharged until sometime tomorrow and he can stall bringing him to the house for a little while if we need him to,” Hen said. “Good thing we’re not on shift tomorrow.”

“And look at that, neither am I,” Josh said. 

They looked to Buck. “Working early in the morning,” he said and it wasn’t something he could miss after the day of work that he’d already missed this week. 

“And we have to clean up the place a bit?” Hen asked, looking at Buck. 

“I did a bit of cleaning yesterday when I stopped by to feed Legolas but it’s still a bit of a mess after the earthquake.” 

“Okay,” Hen said. “So we’ll have to get there early to set up.” 

Buck nodded along and as all the details were ironed out, he tried to figure out if maybe this party might end up being the perfect time for him to come clean. They would all be there and he could explain the whole thing. And then when it was all over he could walk away and maybe things wouldn’t be that bad. If Buck mentally prepared himself for it, then it would be okay even if it hurt. It was definitely going to hurt. 

Josh hung back after Hen and Chimney headed off. “So, what is going on? Like, the truth?” 

“I have no idea. He doesn’t remember everything yet so I’m pretty sure he just thinks he’s forgotten me. The whole thing is messed up but I have to tell him, right? I can’t let him keep trying to remember me when he won’t be able to? I just haven’t been alone with him since that one day when he was pushing me to become a firefighter and I don’t even know what to make of that. I just — this is so weird.” 

Josh pulled him into a hug. “Everything will be okay, Buck. Even if it blows up in your face. I’ll still be your friend.” 

“Thanks,” Buck said and he meant it because he needed to know that he wouldn’t lose everyone.

“And I don’t think you’ll lose everyone either after it all comes out,” Josh said. 

Buck didn’t agree, but he didn’t feel like arguing that point. 

He and Josh parted ways and Buck headed towards his Jeep.

—-

Eddie went on his own to pick Andrew up from the hospital because everyone else including Abuela and Pepa were at Andrew’s house for the surprise welcome home party. When he arrived at the hospital room, Andrew hadn’t been discharged yet. 

“Waiting on the doctor,” Andrew explained. 

So Eddie sat down. “And how are you doing? Remembering more?” 

“A bit,” Andrew said and then after a short moment, “quite a bit.” 

“The dog? Buck?” Eddie asked at once and maybe he was a little too eager. 

Andrew chuckled. “I don’t even like Lord of the Rings, Eddie. I have no idea whose dog that is.” 

“I thought you liked the movies. Wait, you used to read the books when we were kids...and I remember a very long rant about The Hobbit movies”

Andrew just blinked at him. “I don’t remember everything,” he said with a shrug. “But, I remembered your ex. Christopher’s mother.” 

“You don’t remember your own boyfriend, but you remember her,” Eddie said incredulously. 

Andrew chuckled. “He’s great, though, isn’t he? Buck. I really like him. I haven’t gotten to spend too much time alone with him, but as far as I can tell he’s a pretty great guy and I wouldn’t be here without him, would I? I was actually trying to push him into joining the LAFD. I think it would be a great fit for him, wouldn’t you?”

Eddie nodded. “Yeah, I guess it would be.” 

“And he’s nice to look at, isn’t he? Really well fit, I’ve been meaning to ask him about his workout routine. Everyone seems to like him. I kind of get it, I guess, even if I don’t remember. Mom and dad seem to like him more than your ex.”

It wasn’t surprising that Andrew liked Buck. Somewhere deep down, Andrew probably did remember how he felt about Buck — his attraction to Buck. And that made Eddie’s jaw clench a little and make him want to snap at Andrew. Mostly it also made Eddie a horrible person and a horrible brother. He had no claim on Buck. He had no right to be upset about the way that Andrew talked about Buck. 

“Anyway, I don’t remember him, but what I know of him now I like. Did you know he lived in South America for a while? He didn’t say where but I think it’s so cool that he did his own thing and just went where he wanted to. I admire him for it.”

Eddie couldn’t remember if he’d known that about Buck or not. 

“And considering the coffee he makes, I can only imagine how good he is at mixing drinks,” Andrew said and he looked thoughtful for a moment. “Also, I keep meaning to ask if that’s a scar on his eyebrow or something else. I can’t remember, obviously, but it suits him, don’t you think?” 

Eddie tampered down the possessive monster inside of him that wanted nothing more than to stop Andrew from continuing to talk about Buck as if he actually knew him and as if he liked him or felt more for him even though of course Andrew felt that way about Buck. They were dating. Eddie was just...he was stupid enough to not have good control over his feelings. 

“It’s a birthmark, I think,” Eddie said and tried to be nonchalant.

“Must be why it fits him so well,” Andrew said with a decisive nod. 

Eddie wanted the doctor to get there and discharge Andrew already. He checked his phone. Hen was giving him the okay to bring Andrew home. Eddie couldn’t help but wonder if Buck would stick around at Andrew’s place, if he was looking forward to having him out of the hospital. Eddie had to push those thoughts away. 

“Have you spoken to mom and dad?” Eddie asked, making the effort to change the subject. 

“Yes,” Andrew said. “Got my phone charged so I got caught up on a few things and called them. She’s been texting me practically every hour.” 

“That’s mom,” Eddie said. “She worries.” 

“Yeah, I got that.” 

It was another twenty minutes before a doctor finally appeared with the discharge papers and instructions to do with the headaches that Andrew was still having. He had some meds to take for the pain, but he was essentially in good health other than the memory loss. 

“Finally,” Andrew said when they were out of the hospital and walking to Eddie’s car.

Weirdly as much as Eddie was glad that his brother was finally out of the hospital and okay, he also hated him a little. Eddie was cognizant of himself enough to realize that at least some of that was to do with Buck and the feelings that sat on his chest and didn’t seem keen on leaving. 

“I remember your car,” Andrew said somewhat cheerily. “And I drive—” he took a moment to think about it. 

The same moment in which Eddie had to wonder about why none of them had thought to think of Andrew’s car. Eddie should have been the one to think about that and maybe he would have if the hospital had given him Andrew’s things. And actually, come to think of it, Buck hadn’t given them Andrew’s keys even though he was probably the one that had them. 

“I drive a Jeep,” Andrew said. 

Until Andrew said it, Eddie hadn’t even thought about how Buck and Andrew drove the same type of car. Maybe it was yet another thing that had bonded them. Seeing all those connections, the way that Andrew didn’t remember Buck but already seemed entirely fond of him, it made him want to scream. 

“You do,” Eddie said but refrained from telling him that his car had probably been towed in the unlikely event that it wasn’t still wherever Andrew had parked it. 

—-

So maybe Andrew was messing with Eddie a little. It was just that Andrew wanted to know for sure if what he’d seen on Eddie the other day was more than admiration for Buck but something deeper. And from the way that Eddie seemed to be both a bit quieter and a bit stiff that he was in his head about something. Likely Buck. 

It was interesting. A bit ironic in a way, too, and Andrew had figured out how he was going to punish Buck for what he’d done. If it messed with his brother a bit too, well, that was just a nice side effect. 

The drive over to his house was a little familiar and then when Eddie parked, he knew which house was his. Slowly things filled themselves into his head. It was weird the way that things would just fit into place and he knew them. Maybe, it was going to be the same once he saw the dog. Legolas. His phone had given him next to no information about the dog. Andrew didn’t even have pictures of him.

“Familiar?” Eddie asked. 

“Yeah,” Andrew said. “It’s home.”

As the words left his mouth, though, they didn’t feel true and Andrew didn’t know what to make of that because this was his home.  

“My car isn’t here,” Andrew said when he paused at the bottom of the steps. 

Eddie grimaced. “About that,” he said. “We, um, we forgot about it.” 

“You forgot about it,” Andrew said. 

“Look, I will take care of everything. I think Pepa assumed Buck would have done it but we were all a bit distracted with you in a coma and everything. But I’ll figure all of that out tomorrow.” 

Andrew couldn’t even really be mad. It was the whole Buck problem rearing its head again. 

They walked up the steps and Andrew noticed that there were a few cracks on the concrete that he knew hadn’t been there before. And when Eddie opened the door, it didn’t glide in like usual. Andrew barely had time to focus on that though because the last thing Andrew expected was to step inside and have everyone yell “Surprise!” 

—-

Christopher still had a bandage around his wrist and it was a reminder to Buck of what he’d allowed to happen even if no one else blamed him for it. Not even Christopher who had hugged Buck when he first arrived at Andrew’s house with Isabel and Pepa and then followed him around and tried to help him with whatever Buck was doing. 

Isabel had recently been in the hospital too after a bad fall, but she was doing fine and she’d only gone because she hadn’t been able to get up on her own and she thought she might have injured her hip but she’d had her phone close by and managed a call to 9-1-1. Mostly, Pepa was keeping her seated and comfortable because the fall had left her bruised up. It made Buck hesitate on wanting to tell everyone the truth, but then again most things made him rethink it and too much time had passed. Buck needed to tell them. 

“You look like you’re worrying about something,” Josh said. 

“I’m telling them,” Buck said. “Today.” 

Josh raised an eyebrow at him and pat his shoulder. “Things have been going so well lately, do you really want to just blow that up?” 

“Andrew is going to remember everything any day now. Him coming home is just going to make that process even faster and then what?”

Josh sighed. “Look, there’s things you don’t—”

“Josh, I can’t keep lying,” Buck said. “It’s too...it’s different now that he’s awake. This has gone on way too long.”

“Yeah, I get that, but maybe wait a little longer or I don’t know, have you considered talking to Andrew and explaining.” 

The idea of talking to Andrew about it first had merit, but Buck just didn’t know if would be possible for Buck to do it during a party that meant that Andrew would likely be surrounded by people all the time. 

“Maybe,” Buck said. 

Hen was the one to get the text that Eddie and Andrew were on their way from the hospital which meant that the last minute details had to be worked out. 

“Is she like this at every party?” Buck asked. 

Athena chuckled. “Surprise parties, yes. Easier to go along with whatever she wants though.” 

Karen nodded in agreement. Buck took it in, the way that Athena smiled and the way that Karen nodded even while he eyes shone with pride and love for her wife. He was going to miss them. He was going to miss all of them. 

Legolas started barking when they heard Eddie and Andrew outside and Buck had to wonder if that was because the dog knew that his owner was home. When Eddie opened the door, everyone shouted “surprise!” and Andrew looked taken aback. 

“Seriously?” Andrew asked through a laugh. 

“We had to,” Hen said and she was the first one to rush over and hug him. 

Buck’s attention was on Legolas who did rush over but only sniffed at Andrew before jumping at Eddie who pet his head lightly before Legolas turned back to Andrew. It was curious. Legolas had been more excited to see Christopher when he first got to the house and if Buck was allowed to think it, the dog had been more excited to see him. But Andrew was his owner...his person and the dog was treating him just like anyone else. 

Eddie had said it a lot though, Andrew didn’t like dogs. Maybe Legolas could sense that. The whole it was getting more and more confusing. If Buck didn’t know any better that dog had insinuated himself into Andrew’s life just like Buck had. 

Andrew hugged Pepa and walked over to the couch to hug Isabel and then his eyes found Buck. Buck didn’t know what to do. Did he rush over and hug him or did he wait to see what Andrew would do. He decided to leave it up to Andrew. 

“Hey,” Andrew said. 

Buck felt like everyone was watching them. Tentatively, Buck moved towards Andrew. He smiled and went in for a quick hug, the kind that was awkward and unsure because Buck had no idea how familiar he was allowed to be. Andrew leaned into the hug, but he didn’t linger, pulling back and ending the hug quick as it had begun. 

“Really?” Hen asked. 

“What?” Buck said. 

“That hug was pathetic,” Hen said with a roll of her eyes. “It’s no wonder he doesn’t remember you if you can’t even hug him properly. Your boyfriend is home, Buck, you should be kissing him...I bet you haven’t even done that and he’s been awake for a while now.” There was judgement in her eyes at least instead of suspicion. 

Buck felt his cheeks go warm. He didn’t know what to say and over Andrew’s shoulder he met Chim’s eyes who looked like he found the whole thing hilarious and couldn’t wait to poke fun at the situation. No one else stepped forward to welcome Andrew home. 

“Uh, not doing that in front of all his family,” Buck said in a low tone. 

His eyes met Andrew’s and because they were still standing close enough, it didn’t take Andrew any effort at all to take Buck’s hand and pull him even closer. 

“What—”

Andrew made a show of rolling his eyes, he was smirking too in a strangely knowing way, the twists of his lips making it seem like he was accepting a challenge and then he drew Buck even closer and he kissed him. 

It was chaste, more of a peck than anything else and it lasted seconds and afterwards Andrew laughed and he threw an arm around Buck’s shoulders. Buck felt lost, like he had no idea what had just happened or why. The next few moments were a blur of standing close to Andrew who’s lips had felt fluffy and soft even while chapped, and who was still undeniably hot even after just getting out of the hospital. Kissing him was no hardship and a part of Buck — the part that still had a bit of a crush — wanted the kiss to last longer than it did. The trance was broken only once Andrew let him go and stepped back and then he was gone. 

–

Next Chapter

Notes: Sooo, did any of you expect things to go there? I just love Andrew sooo much and he was particularly fun to write in this chapter. Let me know what you all thought and thanks for reading. 

If anyone wants to be tagged in future chapters, let me know. :)

Tagging: @tranquility-or-chaos @diazbuckleysworld @stilesgivesmefeels

[inawickedlittletown]

I’m With You (9/?)

Summary:

Having a crush was nothing to be ashamed of...lying to the family and friends of said crush about being the guy’s boyfriend, that was a whole other problem. When Buck saves the life of Andrew Diaz and accidentally makes a nurse think that he’s Andrew’s boyfriend, Buck soon finds himself lying to Andrew’s firefighter friends/coworkers as well as Andrew’s family including Andrew’s very suspicious and attractive brother, Eddie.

Based on the 1995 movie While You Were Sleeping.

Words: 3,527

Notes: I think I wrote this entire chapter in one sitting. It’s one of my favorites. Enjoy. ;)

Read on Ao3

Masterpost

Previous Chapter 

--

The first time that Buck was on his own with Chimney since the time Chimney overheard him talking to Andrew happened the next morning when he found Chimney already sitting at Andrew’s bedside. 

“Hey, liar,” Chimney said with a smirk. 

“Maybe don’t say that too loud,” Buck said. 

Chimney laughed at that and Buck walked over to sit down across from him at Andrew’s other side. 

“How’s it going, Buck? Have you found a way to tell the truth yet?” 

Buck let out a sigh. He leaned his elbows on the bed and placed his face in his hands. “No,” he said. “And I know it’s just making it worse and worse. He’ll wake up any day now and the truth will come out.” 

Chimney didn’t respond at once. And then he faced Buck directly. “Look,” he said, “I get how hard this is even if I’ve never dug myself into a hole like this one. But everyone will understand if you explain. I know they will. They might get mad...but they’ll understand, Buck.” 

“I don’t know about that,” Buck said and he was thinking about Eddie. 

After the truth came out, Buck was pretty much resigned to having a clean break from all of them. Maybe not Chimney because he already knew, but certainly everyone else. They would be angry at him and maybe hate him. They wouldn’t want him around and there was no reason for Buck to stick around no matter how much he liked them and how much he loved the way that they were so warm and welcoming to him. 

“Everyone likes you, Buck,” Chimney said. 

“And I’ve lied to them,” Buck reminded him. “And I don’t think he’ll be happy about any of that at all.” Buck motioned to Andrew. 

“Or he’ll surprise you and find the whole thing funny,” Chimney said. 

Buck rolled his eyes at that. They fell into silence for a while. The thing about Chimney was that Buck could tell that he meant well and that Chim could tell it was an impossible situation and yet he wanted to be optimistic and hope for the best. Buck knew to not hope for something he couldn’t guarantee. And people...no matter how much you wanted to stay, they left. 

“So, the dog,” Chimney said eventually. “That’s not really Andrew’s dog, is it?” 

“I have absolutely no idea. All I know is that the hospital gave me Andrew’s things and there was a dog collar. And I went to his place and there was a dog.”

“You went to his house,” Chimney said. “You’re a bit pushy, aren’t you? I can see why you’re in this mess.” 

Buck groaned. He sat back in the chair. “If there was a dog, I didn’t want it to be starving if no one was checking on it.” 

“Okay, fine,” Chimney said. “But doesn’t all of that just make it even worse? You let yourself into his house while not being his real boyfriend. You have told any of us. Eddie? Instead, you went to his house.” 

“I had a key,” Buck said. 

“His keys. Keys you had entirely because you’re pretending to be his boyfriend,” Chimney said. 

Buck groaned again. “I know I screwed up. It’s such a big giant mess.” 

Chimney didn’t deny it. 

A knock on the door had them both turning and Buck was surprised to find Josh there. 

“Hey,” Buck said. 

“Finally had time to stop by here and see our coma patient,” Josh said as he walked in. He stopped at the foot of Andrew’s bed. “He looks like’s he’s having the most peaceful sleep. Asshole.” 

“Hi,” Chimney said. “And who are you?” 

“This guy’s best friend, that’s who,” Josh said and he pat Andrew’s leg. 

“Buck’s?” Chimney asked, still looking a bit confused. 

“Andrew’s,” Josh said. 

Buck let out a sigh as Chimney and Josh stared at each other for a while. 

“Right,” Chimney said, “so I’ve heard nothing about you.” 

“You’ve heard nothing about him either,” Josh said motioning to Buck. 

Chimney glanced between them and then sighed. “I want nothing to do with whatever drama this is. There’s enough of that going around.” 

“You both know the truth,” Buck said. “About me not being his boyfriend.”

Chimney’s shoulders relaxed a little at hearing that. “Oh,” he said. “Alright, then. Still, never heard of you Josh. Or his dog. What else is he hiding, a wife? A kid? You think you know someone.” The way that Chim smiled a bit cheekily after he said it made Buck relax. 

“Well, I still think Andrew will take this well,” Josh said. 

“Or not well at all,” Chimney said even though he’d been saying the opposite earlier. 

Buck actually didn’t want to think on it too much so he changed the subject, asking Chimney about Andrew’s neighbor from the day before. 

“She’s good,” Chimney said. “You made a difference, Buck.”

It felt good to hear that just as good as it had felt for Bobby to tell him that maybe he should consider becoming a first responder. The idea had merit, but with everything else going on, Buck didn’t know if he should. Or if he would actually be good at it and a right fit. The whole thing might end up being like the Seals all over again. 

“Thanks,” Buck said.

“With him too,” Chimney said, “seeing as he was a stranger.” 

Buck glared at him and Josh just laughed. 

“And what do you do Josh?” Chimney asked. 

“I work at dispatch,” Josh said. 

Buck was suddenly hit by why he’d thought that Josh was familiar. He must have seen him before on the few times that Buck had visited 9-1-1 dispatch back when he was with Abby. 

“Buck?” Chim asked. 

“My last girlfriend worked as a dispatcher,” he said. “Abby.”

Josh looked pensive for a moment. “Abby,” he said. “I think — I think I remember her. She left after her mom died. Just up and never came back even though...she was supposed to.”

Buck nodded. “Yeah. Didn’t even break up with me before she did,” he said. 

He kind of hated thinking about Abby and the heartbreak that had followed her leaving. He’d been waiting for way too long before he realized that things were over between them. There had been a delusional part of him that just expected to somehow get back to her apartment and find her there.

“That’s rough,” Josh said. 

Buck shrugged. It was easier to not let anyone know that it affected him still. “It is what it is.” 

—-

Eddie woke up to his son poking him. He was fully dressed already and apparently just waiting for him. Since having his parents around, Eddie had admittedly been getting more sleep. In some ways, that made him dread them leaving soon. 

“Hey, kiddo,” Eddie said.

“Daddy, breakfast is ready.” 

He could smell it. The bacon and the coffee mostly. He got out of bed, grabbing Christopher. His son laughed and giggled as Eddie dropped him on the bed. Christopher scrambled off as quickly as he could and together they walked out to the kitchen where Eddie found not just his parents but Abuela and Isabel too.

“I didn’t know we were having a party,” Eddie said and he walked over to kiss Abuela’s cheek. She smiled and wrapped an arm around his waist.

Ever since his talk with Buck about how little family he had, Eddie had realized that he had to appreciate his more because even when they were annoying and pushy they were still there and Eddie loved them.  

“Sit, sit,” Abuela said. 

Christopher was already seated at the table and digging into his food next to Eddie’s mom and Eddie dropped down into the chair next to him. He was still a bit groggy and more focused on eating and drinking the mug of coffee that Pepa handed him to contribute or even pay attention to the conversation happening around him. 

By the time that he was more awake, he found Pepa already doing the dishes and cleaning up and his parents talking about going to the hospital. 

“Unfortunately we can’t stay much longer,” his mom said. “A few more days and we have to get back to Texas. At least, Ramon does.”

Eddie had already expected that. 

“He was looking a lot better yesterday,” Pepa said. “Had a lot of his color back. The doctor is optimistic he’ll wake up today or tomorrow or so the nurses were saying.” 

Eddie hoped that was the case. He knew his parents would likely go back to El Paso if they had to, but it wouldn’t lessen their worry. His mom especially. It would mean hearing from her every minute of every day for updates and Eddie did not have time for that. 

“Eddie, Christopher estaba hablando de up perro?” 

[“Eddie, Christopher was talking about a dog?”] 

Eddie looked to Abuela. “El perro de Andrew. Buck lo hesta cuidando.” 

[“Andrew’s dog. Buck is taking care of him.”]

He could practically feel the confusion coming off of his parents. Even Abuela looked surprised. 

“That’s so nice,” Pepa said. “They have a dog together.” 

“Your brother doesn’t like dogs,” his mom said. “Or is it Buck’s dog? He didn’t mention having one but it would make sense if he had one.” 

Eddie shook his head. “No, it’s Andrew’s dog. I was shocked too but he even has a doggy door installed on his backdoor. I took Christopher over to meet Legolas yesterday and he’s this sweet golden retriever.”

“And he never mentioned getting a dog?” his dad asked. “Come on, Eddie, that’s — you both live in the same state and work at the same fire station and yet you share nothing. You didn’t know about the boyfriend and now the dog.”

Eddie shook his head out of annoyance more than anything else. “I am not his keeper. I have a son and things that keep me too busy to be looking out for Andrew all the time. He’s a grown man and he doesn’t always tell me everything. Clearly. I don’t know why but we’ll find out more when he wakes up.” 

No one said anything and Eddie picked that moment to go get changed so they could head out. 

The hospital parking lot and the hospital for that matter was becoming all too familiar for Eddie and he was a firefighter and making many trips to the ER doors. He’d just never spent as much time there past dropping off a patient. It was different to be visiting someone at the hospital all the time. Pepa had driven ahead of him with his parents which had left Eddie with Christopher and Abuela and as soon as Eddie had helped Christopher out of the car, he was walking with Abuela at his side. Eddie followed a few paces behind and that’s how he managed to spot Buck. 

Buck was talking to a man that Eddie didn’t know. They were laughing a bit and standing close together and then Buck leaned into him and hugged him and the guy hugged back. The hug lasted longer than Eddie thought a regular hug would and then when they broke apart, the guy leaned in and kissed Buck on the cheek and Eddie was sure that Buck was blushing and none of it made sense. Who was that guy and why was he all over Buck and why was Buck letting him? 

Something sparked inside of Eddie, it made him angry and annoyed in a way he hadn’t felt possibly ever. His eyes remained trained on the guy with Buck. He saw them laughing again and then the man walked away and Buck started heading back towards the hospital. It was lucky Abuela and Christopher hadn’t spotted him, but Buck did see Eddie and he smiled and waved, stopping to wait for him, but Eddie wasn’t feeling friendly. 

“Hey,” Buck said as he approached. 

Eddie didn’t know what came over him. Was it protectiveness over his brother? He didn’t know. All he knew was that seeing Buck hugging that guy wore on him. 

“Who was that?” Eddie asked. 

“Who?” 

“The guy you were hugging? The guy that maybe you’re cheating on Andrew with?” The words left him before he’d even realized he was going to say them. 

Buck looked taken aback. “Josh? That’s your brother’s best friend.”

Eddie narrowed his eyes at Buck. “I’ve never heard of a Josh before.” 

“Yes, well you haven’t heard about a lot of the people your brother is friends with,” Buck said with a sigh. “And I would never cheat on Andrew.” 

“Well, I’m not even sure you’re really his boyfriend,” Eddie said and he knew it wasn’t fair. 

Buck laughed, but it was strangled and humorless. “What would I even gain from lying about it?” 

“I don’t know. But there must be something. Andrew is straight and he—”

“And he also hates dogs and he also doesn’t have a friend named Josh and he’s not someone that you apparently know very well at all,” Buck said and Eddie could see some spark in him. Anger and maybe something else. 

“So prove it,” Eddie said. “If he’s your boyfriend then there should be a way to prove it.” 

Eddie had never demanded anything point blank before even though a part of him had wanted to. Buck didn’t respond, instead he shrugged him off and turned and walked towards the hospital doors. Eddie didn’t take long to follow him. He didn’t know what to make of the lack of answer. Was Buck going to give him some sort of proof? Or was this him avoiding giving Eddie an answer. Eddie didn’t even realize they’d made it to the hospital room until he looked up and saw Andrew on the bed. His parents were sitting on one side of the hospital bed. Abuela on the other. Pepa and Christopher weren’t there but Eddie trusted his family to look after him.

And Eddie knew that being there with his family should have stopped him, but he was still just so angry and he didn’t even know if it was about this or because of something else. 

“So, you’re not gonna say anything,” Eddie said, looking at Buck. 

“Eddie come on,” Buck said. 

“Because not saying anything and not giving me proof is really making me doubt everything you’ve ever said to me.” 

Buck glared at him. Everyone in the room was looking at them and when Buck’s glare fell away, he seemed to be looking at Abuela as if to make sure she was okay. 

“Eddie, what is going—” his mom trailed off. 

“Anything at all?” Eddie asked. 

Buck sighed. 

“Hijo, que estas haciendo?” His dad asked.

[“Son, what are you doing?” ]

“I want answers. I’m sure we all do,” Eddie said. “I want to know if Buck is actually telling the truth because I don’t buy it. I don’t buy that he’s Andrew’s boyfriend.” 

Eddie heard Abuela gasp. “But he is,” she said. “He is his boyfriend.” 

“Holy shit,” Chimney whispered and Eddie hadn’t even realized he was there. 

They were all looking between him and Buck and the part of Eddie that really liked Buck, it made him feel horrible for putting him on the spot. And then Buck coughed. He looked at all of them and then his eyes settled on Eddie. 

“Andrew only has one ball sac,” Buck said. 

—-

Buck had never expected to actually need to use that piece of information, but after Eddie had come at him about Josh and then not let up at all despite his whole family being in the hospital room, he really hadn’t had a choice but to use it. A part of him wished that Josh had stuck around to hear it, but then again apparently hugging Josh had been the thing to set off Eddie for some ridiculous reason. 

No one said a thing after the words were out of his mouth and then Chimney coughed. 

“So, uh, who gets to check on that and see if Buck here is telling the truth?” Chimney asked. 

He could see the panic in Chimney’s eyes, like this was going to be the moment when everyone figured Buck out. 

“Or we could just believe him because he’s telling the truth,” Helena said and she was shaking her head at Eddie. 

“Eddie, come on,” Ramon said. “You’re acting crazy.” 

“Well, how about he was hugging someone outside the hospital. Some guy,” Eddie said. “Kissed him too.” 

“Yes,” Buck said. “I hugged Josh. He’s Andrew’s friend and he was just here visiting.” 

Chimney jumped in, then. “I can confirm that.” 

“And the kissing?” Helena asked. 

“On the cheek. Josh is a tactile person,” Buck said. 

Eddie looked like he didn’t want to back down, but he closed his eyes and he took a deep breath and then he just walked out of the room and Buck felt like somebody had reached into his body and just squeezed all of his organs together because Eddie’s anger and the resigned way he walked away made him want to tell the truth and come clean about everything. 

“I’m so sorry about him, Buck,” Helena said. “I think he’s just being protective of Andrew.”

Chimney met Buck’s eyes and it was hard to not just burst out and tell them that Eddie was right and that he’d been lying all along. 

“But we know you’re not lying, Buck,” Isabel said. 

“It’s okay,” Buck said and he felt terrible about the lying but also about Eddie and whatever Eddie was feeling. 

When Christopher entered the room with Pepa, everyone relaxed a little more. Buck ruffled his hair when he passed by and Christopher grinned at him, but he got busy putting another drawing for his uncle on his bedside table. One of the nurses had actually taped a few of them up where they weren’t in the way and where Andrew could see them when he woke up. There were a few other cards on the bedside table as well that had joined Christopher’s. Harry and Denny were responsible for two but there were others. Once again a display of how loved Andrew was. 

“I can go find him. Talk to him,” Buck found himself saying and he didn’t know if it was for Eddie’s sake or because he didn’t want to be in that room anymore watching a family that he wasn’t fully a part of and actually shouldn’t be a part of. 

He didn’t actually find Eddie at once because he wasn’t out in the waiting room or near the vending machines. So Buck wandered outside to see if he could find him there and found him leaning against a wall. 

“Eddie,” Buck said as he approached. 

Eddie turned his face to look at him. “What are you doing out here?” Eddie asked. 

“I — I wanted to understand something. Why are you so...why is it easier to believe that I’m lying or cheating or whatever? Am I just giving you the impression that that is what I’m doing or that that’s who I am? I just...I don’t get it.” 

Eddie groaned. He leaned his head back against the wall and Buck wondered if he should leave him there, but then Eddie looked at him again and his stare was piercing. 

“Because it’s easier to think that there’s some weird reason for why you could have lied about this than to believe that everything I know about my brother is a lie. And maybe I was a bit hasty when it came to — what was his name? Josh?” 

Buck nodded. And he wanted to tell him. He wanted to confirm that everything Eddie was doubting was true and that there was a lot that didn’t make sense. Hell, Legolas didn’t make sense and Buck didn’t even have anything to do with the dog. 

“Okay but that still—”

Eddie cut him off. “No...no, I was out of like. And I should tell you the truth and why it bothered me so damn much because I can’t keep doing this. Even if it—” Eddie ran a hand through his hair and he looked agitated and annoyed and like he was trying to figure out how to use his words. 

Buck had to tell him everything first. It didn’t matter what Eddie might need to say because maybe it was that Eddie already knew. His heart was beating wildly in his chest. But the truth needed to come out at some point. 

“Because I don’t want—”

“Eddie, no, you need to know—”

They spoke at the same time, but neither of them got to finish what they were about to say because before Buck could properly build up his courage or make the decision to actually say something or figure out how he was supposed to say it, Chimney was running out of the hospital. 

“Eddie! Buck!” 

Buck turned and Eddie pushed off the wall. 

“What happened? Chim, what’s—” 

Chimney looked between them and then he said it. “He’s awake. Andrew’s awake.” 

--

Next Chapter

Notes: So, does Andrew have perfect timing or what? 

I actually had no plans for Andrew to wake up quite yet...but then it felt just a little unrealistic to keep him in a coma for too long. And as I was finishing up this chapter when considering all the tension that had grown and this last scene with Buck and Eddie, it just fit. 

Let me know what you all thought! 

And if anyone wants to be tagged in future chapters let me know. :) 

Tagging: @tranquility-or-chaos @diazbuckleysworld @stilesgivesmefeels