#but only mabel seems to get crap for it and I hate it SO much

[hatchetfield-scarecrow]

The day we as a society accept that Dipper Pines is equally if not more selfish than Mabel Pines is the day we’ll know peace.

[guardianoflightanddarkness]

An unpopular opinion about Gravity Falls: Return to the Bunker fanmade episode

(SPOILERS)

Okay, first of all, I want to make perfectly clear that I fully respect the crew and the job put in this episode, seriously, it's a blast to have such passioned fans that keep the fandom alive after 11 years and more to come, and honestly, I would want to see more projects like these and The Woods and Tales of Weirdmaggedon returning.

I was honestly very hyped up with this episode since I found out it was in production, so of course having it full yesterday was an awsome surprise. The art, the storyboard, the staging, the editing and the cast was an easy 10 out of 10, and I have absolutely zero complains in the audiovisual part.

However, sadly, to me, the entire thing comes crashing down with the plot and the narrative, by basically changing and missunderstanding the main characters, specially Ford: yes, it's no secret that Ford has trust issues, I think that was pretty clear after he FELT (not saying they did, but that's his perception) betrayed by his twin brother (sabotaging his project and keeping quiet about it, accidentally trapping him in the multiverse for over half of his life during a fight he started it, stealing his house, his identity, mock his entire carreer for money and then starting the portal that almost destroyed the world), his best friend from college (who created the memory gun and used it against him after starting a cult), his pet (the Shapeshifter tried to kill him and Fiddleford) and his muse (who manipulated him, lied to him, possessed and tortured him for decades, not to mention unable to sleep in peace until he got a plate in his head, and being hunted down accross the entire universe for 30 years), alongside all the stress of re-adapting to his dimension, contain the rift and keep Bill at bay.

So yes, Ford has reasons to be the way he is, but the problem is, the Ford we see in this episode is NOT the same one we saw in the TV show or in Journal 3: Ford can be bitter, and like I said, has trust issues, but he is not an ass for the sake of it like they portrayed him here, specially towards Mabel: yes, true, they didn't spend that much time together, but the little times we saw Ford interacting with her or even just talking, or even his entries in the journal, he shows how much he adores her, he only has praise for her ("I like this kid, she is weird!", "She has a magnetic personality!", "You are a good person, Mabel!"), and openly trusted her with a crossbow and sent her to a mission to protect the Shack. This one is openly hostile to Mabel, refusing to wear her sweater because it's hot (WTF, you are LITTERALLY wearing one!), downright telling her he doesn't trust her when he did before, and even saying he likes Dipper because he listens and obeys blindly. Ford LOVES these kids and always showed it, and yet the man in this episode doesn't seem to give a crap about anyone's feelings by being a jerk without a logical reason.

Which brings me to the next point: his reunion with Fiddleford makes NO sense considering that we saw Ford BLAMING himself over and over for what happened to Fiddleford, we litterally see him thinking he hates him and actually displaying remorse, and Fiddleford showing compassion and forgiveness. Instead here, we see Ford treating Fiddleford like dirt just like he did before the portal incident 30 years ago. And Mcgucket doesn't act like Mcgucket himself either, not to mention how the writing ignores how unstable he can be, ("Dude, Mcgucket would never do that!", sure, let's ignore this is the same guy that creates huge terrifying destructive robots that reck the town on a wim like his son not paying attention to him, his wife divorcing and not getting invited to a friend's party).

The entire episode's narrative and characters bash Ford for his trust issues and traumatic experiences instead of tackling down his trauma propperly: I mean, the show EXPECTS Ford to ignore ALL his traumas for over 3 decades and trust not just Mabel, which would have been understandable, but Soos and Wendy, who he doesn't even know, with the rift, you know, the thing that can destroy them all, and then gets punished for not doing so, and paint him as an ilogical paranoid that puts down everyone around him. None of them show any empathy towards him, and they are quick to antagonize him over it and directly blame him for EVERYTHING that happened in Gravity Falls, and the narrative reassures that they are in the right, pointedly ignoring not just all Ford's trauma but everyone's own actions into all the mess that happened over the summer. For crying out loud, the narrative shows more compassion, understanding and sympathy towards the fricking Shapeshifter and blames Ford for the experiment's fate, the monster ACTUALLY having the gal to say that Ford can't change, that he promises to change but then backtracks and keeps going (ironic that this is accused to Ford, of all characters in this episode) and then getting a fricking REDEMPTION and romance partner that he didn't deserve while ignoring he tried to kill Ford and Fiddleford back in the day, traumatizing the latest one, and tried the same with Dipper, Mabel, Soos and Wendy. But hey, nevermind, he just needed some love, he deserves to be happy, NOT YOU, FORD!....I swear, I can't with this.

And that fricking final...WHERE do I even start with that? Ford was affected and TRAUMATIZED because of the ray gun, he was a victim of it, he was the one who tried to stop Fiddleford from using it on himself MULTIPLE times, and who struggled to do it with Stan and broke down after being forced to do so, to his own brother, and only felt a bit relieved after they got his memories back. And you're fricking telling me he would use it on his 12 year old NIECE and friends AFTER they patched things up and he came clear, breaking THEIR trust?! No, sorry, no, that's just so out of character from Ford I don't even know where to start. I know this was done by force in an attempt to make it fit with the canon story, but it just doesn't match not just because of being completely out of character from Ford, but because it still causes bigger issues: he didn't use it on Mcgucket, therefore Mcgucket KNOWS about the rift and about Ford, therefore it breaks the canon of their reunion in Take Back the Falls since in Ford's words, "Fiddleford, I didn't see you since we parted ways, you must hate me". And then the famous lines of "How am I gonna protect the rift?" Honestly, this entire scene, if not the entire episode, just felt like the writers were just trying so hard to take any accountability from Mabel in handling the rift and just blame it on Ford and screaming "SEE?! YOU SEE HOW MUCH OF A JERK FORD IS?! MABEL DID NO WRONG, IT'S FORD'S FAULT FOR ERASING HER MEMORIES, HE IS THE JERK AND THE MAIN ANTAGONIST OF THE SERIES, WHAT A JERK!". And sorry, this still doesn't fix it, because while Mabel didn't know what the rift was, she still KNEW it belonged to Ford (Blendin told her) and that it belonged to his expedition for, in her own words, "Save the world or whatever", and Blendin telling her to steal it ("your grunkle won't even know it's gone missing!") and she agrees. So yeah, while she didn't fully know what she was taking, the fact that she knew it was something that belonged to her grunkle and that he took to his expedition was enough for her to know to NOT to take away, specially without his consent. This episode just tries so hard to paint Ford like the biggest asshole just to place Mabel and the others in a better light and ignore anything they do, so much that it breaks canon.

And Dipper's and Stan's subplot...I dunno, it felt completely unused, and once again, placing the ball on Dipper, Stan accusing him of ignoring him for a month (which makes zero sense because, Ford came out of the portal barely 2 weeks before Weirdmaggedon, there's no way a month went by, and on the top of that not making any sense considering this happened POST Dungeons, Dungeons and more Dungeons where these two had patched up, so this argument makes zero sense). This one specially dissappointed me because, the same way I wanted to see Ford and Mabel bonding, I wanted more scenes like that with Stan and Dipper, specially when we seemed to finally address the fact that yes, Stan and Dipper didn't spend that much time with him. The problem is that the narrative of the episode blames Dipper entirely and ignores whatever Stan has done wrong in regardless of their relationship that easily made Dipper distant with him: not the teasing, not the hard work to "tought him up", not his unfair treatment towards him in comparison to Mabel, not the fact that he LIED to him for the entire summer and broke his trust, nothing. In fact, just when Dipper loses his patience and actually starts to understandably tell him off putting ALL of these examples, Dipper's callout falls on deaf ears, litterally, because Stan doesn't pay attention to Dipper and is panicked due to the monster behind him. Then after that, ALL of that is forgotten, they don't patch things up, and Dipper is the one who has to apologize to Stan, after Stan, once again, not just kept him from hanging out with Ford, after he had promised he would let him go in Dungeons, Dungeons and more Dungeons, but also lied to him and got them into a bigger mess. But no, Dipper is the one who apologizes and is supposed to trust Stan...because of reasons, even if they didn't talk anything out or solved anything really.

The jokes honestly also felt flat and I only honestly enjoyed the Shrek 2 reference.

So yes, while I think that from terms of art, voice cast and edition this episode is amazing, the narrative, the characterization of the main cast and the development is attrocious. Honestly, it feels more like a bad fanfic hating on Ford (and to some extent, Dipper) and portraying him as the biggest jackass on earth and the reason of everything going wrong. This is not how the characters behave. I seriously have to wonder if the writers even watched the show, let alone read Journal 3 and Lost Legends.

[imnotoverlyobsessive]

Mabel’s All-In-One Guide to Being a Shooting Star: How to Avoid Being Caught and Other Tips You Should Know

Chapter Four: Not Gravity Falls

Whoops I forgot to post it my b you guys

Shoutout to @edward-or-ford and @pacific-ship for being bangs

When I wake up, the dream isn't done, I wanna see your face and know I've made it home. If nothing is true, what more can I do?- All Time Low, Painting Flowers

There was something… off about this Gravity Falls. Which was, of course, to be expected; alternate reality and all that. It wasn’t as different from her Gravity Falls as Not Dipper was from her Dipper, it just… It just felt strange. Like it was just a little bit wrong. It was darker. Everything was darker. She didn’t quite understand why.

She was still somewhat out of it, and walking was a chore. She really missed her bike. Why didn’t she have her bike again? Right, because she’d been abducted by gnomes, and then abducted-slash-rescued by an alternate version of her bro.

He was walking beside her, this alternate Dipper, and there was something different in the way he held himself. Her Dipper was… awkward, for lack of a better word. Adorably so, of course; it was one of the many things that had made her fall in love with him to begin with.

But this version… this version of Dipper walked with an easy sort of confidence Mabel wasn’t used to seeing, not on anybody, or at least not to that degree. He wasn’t awkward. Not even a little. He was sure of himself, perhaps even arrogant. He stood at his full height, not slouching or hunching his shoulders.

He didn’t just walk, either. He strutted, and he didn’t seem to notice when the townspeople (who had all stopped dead in their tracks and were looking at her, slack-jawed and wide-eyed) gave them both an unnecessarily wide berth. He didn’t glance at them, not even briefly to take mental note of their locations in relation to his own. He simply continued on as if they weren’t there, as if they didn’t exist.

They were looking at her with such unmistakable horror that Mabel had to say something.

“Hey,” she murmured at Not Dipper. “What’s the deal with these guys?”

“Hm?” He didn’t appear to have been paying attention to them, so when she voiced her question, he glanced around haphazardly. “Oh, I suppose they might think you’re… the other Mabel.”

“Huh. Weird.” Before she could comment further, her words were cut off.

“Mabel?” came a shocked voice that was almost familiar, but not quite. And when Mabel slowed her pace along the sidewalk and turned her gaze to her right, she found herself looking at a very… well, it was just odd, wasn’t it, almost as odd as Not Dipper’s mannerisms and general Not Dipper-ness. The contrast of these weird versions to the people she knew was lowkey freakin’ her out.

It was… “Pacifica?” It did very much appear to be Pacifica. The girl looked like Pacifica. She had the same face, eyes, and general appearance, but it looked like Pacifica if Pacifica had aged several years and gotten a hippie costume from a Halloween store. Or a Summerween store. Y’know. Whatever.

“You’re, uh… how are you…?” Pacifica was asking, and Mabel still felt a bit wobbly, but she smiled at this strange version of Pacifica all the same.

“Hi!” Mabel greeted with a cheerful wave, sticking her hand out for the other girl to shake. “I’m Mabel, nice to meet ya!” There was murmuring of words from the crowd that Mabel couldn’t hear or understand, and Pacifica was looking at Mabel’s hand like it had a shark’s mouth and the corresponding number of teeth (which was, fun fact, three thousand), and would give her hand similar treatment to that of those teenagers in Jaws.

Realizing Pacifica wasn’t gonna take her hand, Mabel lowered it with a pout. Not Dipper wasn’t looking at her. He’d stopped walking when she had, but he was staring off into space, his expression blank.

“I… I don’t understand,” Pacifica said, eyeing Mabel warily. “How are you… how are you here?”

Suddenly, Mabel remembered: ‘nother universe, concussion, blah blah blah.

“Right!” She snapped her fingers. “Sorry, I totes magoats forgot!” Pacifica (and everyone else) raised their eyebrows at her. “Have a bit of a concussion here,” she explained, knocking on the side of her head. “Yowch, prolly shouldn’t’ve done that. Anyway, the long and short of it is,” she paused for dramatic effect, “I’m from an alternate dimension! Ta-da!” She did jazz hands. Dramatic effect really was important. Essential, even.

“Okay,” Pacifica said slowly, looking immensely confused. “So, how, exactly…” she glanced at Not Dipper, and her eyes widened. “Holy crap, what happened?!” she exclaimed, rushing towards him. “Are you okay? We need to get you to a hospital, ommigod!”

He rolled his eyes, allowing them to land on her. “It’s none of your concern.” His voice was bored, disinterested, like the absolute last thing in the world he wanted to be doing was to be talking to her, and the fact that he was having to was nothing more than an irritating waste of time.

“Worry not, little missy!” Mabel gave her a double thumbs up. “We’re gonna get it taken care of and the not-broseph over here will be a-okay!”

Nobody else said anything. Pacifica was still looking at her nervously. If they thought she was the alternate universe’s Mabel and they were acting like, well, that, then what in the hell had her other self done to them? Dang diggity, they were looking at Not Dipper the same way; what had he done to them?

She glanced at him. He wasn’t looking at Pacifica anymore. He was staring off into space again.

“Um, well, I-“

Pacifca’s nervous stuttering was cut off by Not Dipper sighing, taking Mabel’s hand in his, and pulling her forward again. “Time to go,” he said, not bothering to look over his shoulder.

Had he always been so... apathetic? Mabel wasn’t sure. Her head was still pounding somewhat, and she couldn’t remember suuuuuper clearly, but she was pretty sure he’d been paying attention to her before. In fact, he’d been focused entirely on her, she had thought. But just then, he wasn’t focusing on anything. He’d totally snubbed Pacifica, too!

“Where are we going, exactly?” Mabel asked, doing her best to wave over her shoulder at the bewildered and fearful-looking townspeople as Not Dipper dragged her along behind him, his hand gentle but firm around hers.

“Home,” Not Dipper said simply, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Not her home, obviously, but his. Was it her shaken brain, or was his distinct lack of the word ‘my’ weird?

“Not… uh…” she took a moment to collect her thoughts. Stupid concussion. What was that word again? “Not a hospital?”

“Not a hospital,” he agreed.

“O...kay…?”

After several minutes of him walking in strides that were a bit much for Mabel, particularly since she was having difficulty walking at all, he looked over his shoulder at her with one of those stupid stupid stupid grins-

“You seem to be having a bit of trouble there, Mabel dear. You’re quite sure you don’t want me to carry you again?”

“Yes, I’m sure!” She nodded emphatically. But, wait a second. “Again? What do you mean again?”

“Oh,” he glanced over his shoulder at her for a second, as if he’d forgotten he’d mentioned it to begin with. “I carried you earlier. When you were unconscious, you know.”

“R- right,” she stuttered. He’d carried her? How terribly embarrassing. She was far too heavy to be carried, and she was massively uncomfortable with this random version of her twin she loved in a very un-sister-type way knowing that she was far too heavy to be carried. “Thank you for saving me, by the way.”

“Of course,” he said easily. “Though please do try not to get into too much trouble now that you’re here.” He paused for a moment. “I’d hate to see something happen to you.”

“Honestly, the only place weird stuff ever happens to me is Gravity Falls,” she chuckled a bit. Her own need to escape had trapped her in a way, hadn’t it? “I’m probably no safer here than I was in my dimension.”

They’d migrated from sidewalks to dirt walkways along the side of a long, winding road that Mabel couldn’t see the end of.

“You’re safe with me,” he told her firmly. “I won’t let anything happen to you.”

He was pulling her along the dirt path still, the earth and gravel crunching beneath her shoes. It was fairly dark by this point, so the chill of the evening air bit into the bare skin her shorts and loose crop top revealed.

“Sorry for complaining, but like. We’ve been walkin’ for a hot minute here, and I’m not seeing any houses in sight, so I’m just…'' she paused to take a break. Words were hard when one had a concussion. “Just kinda wondering if we’ll ever actually get to your far-far-away abode, y’know?”

“We’re almost there,” he assured her, and she could’ve sworn he squeezed her hand, but she really wasn’t sure. She might’ve imagined it. Actually, she probably imagined it. Almost certainly.

Which, side note, but why was he still holding her hand? They weren’t exactly walking side by side, no, but she was close enough behind him to where he didn’t really need to lead her anywhere.

Before she could formulate the words to question it, however, a wall came into view. A very high wall. Perhaps ten feet? Mabel didn’t know; she’d never been great at math. Sue her. It was stone, it looked like, but it was difficult to tell for certain because it was covered in ivy from top to bottom.

“You see?” He smiled at her slightly. “We’re there.”

The road they were walking beside appeared to end at a very large, ornate wrought iron gate that the wall-slash-fence appeared to house, and beyond that lay a driveway, leading to…

A… castle? It certainly looked like a castle. It was very very tall, and she couldn’t see much, but it definitely looked like a castle.

She sped up her pace a bit so she could match his long strides and poke him lightly on the arm. He looked down at her with mild amusement, it looked like. “Hey, uh…” he raised his eyebrows at her. “Is that where you live?”

“Yes, that’s why we’re here,” he said as if it were obvious. As if anyone living in a goddamn castle in the year of our lord 2019 was an obvious conclusion for somebody to jump to.

She noticed that some of his hair had fallen from its slicked back style and was falling over his birthmark. She wondered what it would look like down. She wondered what it would feel like. She wondered- no no no, bad Mabel, very bad, he’s not your Dipper!

“So…” she trailed off for a second. “Just to be clear, so we’re like, one-hundred-and-ten percent on the same page here, you live in a castle. Have… have I got that right, oooorrrrrr…?”

“If you consider this a castle, then yes, I suppose.” Not Dipper was looking down at her again, and he looked like he found her surprise quite funny. Which she didn’t exactly appreciate, but y’know. Beggars can’t choose their rescuers and all that.

They’d finally reached the gate, and it appeared to have a very large G in very fancy cursive on it.

He pressed his thumb to an electronic pad. The gate creaked open, and he strolled through it, pulling her along after him. It closed again as soon as they went through, and she found herself looking around every way she could without making herself all dizzy again.

They navigated around what appeared to be a hedge maze (that she would later discover was also in the shape of a giant cursive G), and it was several more minutes before they reached the overly tall wooden doors.

It wasn’t until he pushed the door open, taking his hand from hers in the process, that she realized he’d never let go of her hand. He’d been holding it the entire time, and she’d never even noticed.

[nataliedanovelist]

C-137 Vs. 46'\

C-137 Vs. 46'\ = A Gravity Falls & Rick and Morty crossover fic for @stephreynaart! I meant to finish this, like, forever ago, but I did my best and decided this has stayed hidden in my files long enough. I hope y’all enjoy it!

Stanchez for life!!!

~~~~~~~~~~

Episode Placement: GF = after the finale (season 3) R&M = Between S1E10 and E11 (In S2E2, Rick dates 1/12/2015 on the drop-off papers for Jerry. Though Alex hates dating cartoons, it can be estimated that GF took place during 2013 thanks to Sev'ral Timez, so the next summer would be 2014. So… yeah. I put way too much thought into this.)

The vast galaxy in front of them was an endless sea of stars and space-clouds of many different colors. Some were green, some were blue, some were magenta, it honestly looked like a generic Hot Topic galaxy t-shirt.

But Rick didn’t give a shit about some fucking space-clouds or some fucking shop for teenagers who were trying too hard to be goth. Rick didn’t give a shit about the fact that Morty barely knew how to drive the fucking spaceship. Rick only have a shit about getting away from the other fucking spaceships that were after the humans, but he couldn’t drive because Rick had to repair the fucking weapon to kill those fucking bastards. Fuck.

“Aw, geez, Rick, hurry it up!” Morty yelled.

“Don’t tell me how to do my job, Morty!” Rick snapped back as he tinkered with the huge ray-gun that laid by his feet.

The spacecraft jolted to the side as a beam just barely missed it. Rick caught his screwdriver as it flew in the air for a second and he finished the final turn. Rick grinned maliciously and aimed the newest invention out at the enemy. He pulled the trigger and rather than a beam of light or a bullet escaping the gun, it appeared that nothing happened, until each spaceship seemed to be covered with blood and guts from the inside, covering the windows and halting the enemies’ spaceships.

“Oh my God, Rick, what the hell?!” Morty screamed.

“Relax, Morty, you’ve seen worse. It’s just a gun that released microscopic ninjas that slice people up from the inside until they’re nothing b-b-but guts.” Rick burped through the alcohol and leaned on the big gun proudly with a monotone voice and facial expression.

“No, Rick, what the hell IS THAT?!”

Rick looked ahead to see a wormhole of pink, blues, and whites glowing brightly in front of them. Morty was trying to turn the spaceship away, but they were being pulled in by gravity.

“Well, fuck.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Mabel was bouncing like she had springs on the bottoms of her shoes as she held her Grunkle Ford’s hand. They were both wearing ponchos and on their way to the magical part of the forest. Mabel, Dipper, Stan, and Ford had only been back in Gravity Falls for two days and Ford wanted to start off this summer right by bonding with his favorite grandniece in the Multiverse.

Ford felt guilty of the little time they had spent together the previous summer. True, he had arrived home a little late in the season, but he had spent plenty of time bonding with Dipper, leaving not nearly enough for Mabel. Ford loved her very much, but with Dipper things were more predictable. The boy was a lot like him, so Ford knew what to expect and how to bond with him, like playing Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons or working or investigating an anomaly together. Ford had no clue what twelve… thirteen-year-old girls liked and Mabel’s overwhelming flood of love and affection had startled Ford like an old alley-cat.

Still, he admired her positivity and loved to do arts-and-crafts with her. They had captured time last summer for her to make a beautiful hand-turkey on Ford’s six-fingered hand; she had said that the extra feather made it special. The old scientist had no idea what he had done to deserve Mabel… no, he didn’t deserve Mabel, but she seemed to like him, so he owed her some alone-time. Mabel seemed to like the supernatural almost as much as Dipper (Dipper took a more serious approach to it while Mabel seemed to accept everything with loving arms), so Ford offered to take her out to the magical part of the forest over breakfast and Mabel nearly choked on her Stan-cake out of pure joy.

Now, as the morning sun rose and was nearly above their heads, after about an hour of traveling and quietly talking, they were starting to reach the magical part of the forest.

“So, why do we need ponchos, Grunkle Ford?” Mabel asked as she used her free-hand to play with the yellow hood that was over her beautiful brown hair.

“Because the fairies we’re going to investigate are… rather messy.” Ford landed on. The Barf Fairies used to turn his stomach, but after traveling through dimensions for over thirty years, Ford’s stomach had hardened and since Mabel also seemed to have a strong gag-reflex, he decided that he would try to learn more about the less-than-pleasant type of fairies. “I would hate for them to ruin a Mabel Pines original.” Ford added with a smile down at the young teenager.

Mabel grinned braces-free (she had them removed back in February) up at the old scientist, loving it when he called one of her sweaters a Mabel Pines original, and her eyes twinkled when she saw the blue sweater through Ford’s poncho, the one she had made for him with a golden six-fingered hand on the front, like his old journals. “So, these are…”

“Barf Fairies.”

“Right. What do you already know about them?”

“Only that we should avoid whatever they eat.”

Mabel laughed along with him and said, “Okay. Well… I’ve actually never talked to or met a fairy before, so looks like we’re both starting from square-one. Did you meet any fairies out in the Multiverse?”

“Yes, but they were very different than the one here in Gravity Falls. I once landed in a dimension where the seasons changing was caused by the fairies, and in another dimension I met a giant fairy-queen that looked more like a slug with wings covered in glitter.”

Mabel opened her mouth to contribute to the conversation, but they both heard a noise and stopped walking in the woods. The sound had made them think of clanking metal and yells. They looked up and around at the trees, but a little puff of smoke confirmed that they had heard some sort of machine.

“What was that?” Mabel asked quietly.

“I’m not sure.” Ford said honestly and started to walk them to a clearing.

The two Pines left the cluster of pinetrees so they could look around the skies more clearly. It was a beautiful cloudless early-summer day. As they looked up at the heavens above, a flying-disk of a spaceship was whizzing over their heads, having trouble staying up in the air. Ford held Mabel close in fear of it crashing down near them, but the spaceship staggered over the woods and crashed landed from a safe distance.

“Aliens!” Mabel gasped. “Dipper told me about the one under the town! Do you think this is like that one?”

Ford, whose mind was racing, shook his head to try to think straight, and he said, “No, I… I think I know what it is, but… Mabel, I’m afraid the Barf Fairies are going to have to wait.”

Mabel peeled off her poncho and shook her hair free, revealing her purple sweater with a heart and sunglasses on it that matched her red skirt and headband. Ford also took off his poncho, pocketed both of the big yellow articles of clothing in his trenchcoat, but then pulled out his gun. He opened his mouth to tell Mabel to stay close, but she already pulled out her grappling hook and was standing behind Ford, waiting for him to lead the way.

Ford crept back into the woods with Mabel behind him. He had a good idea of what had crashed into Gravity Falls, but he had hoped that he was wrong. He didn’t want Mabel to meet him. Ford was hoping he would never show up in this dimension, but if he was still traveling around the Multiverse…

A low hissing noise from a busted engine told Ford and Mabel where to go. They only had to walk a minute before the spaceship came into view, landing in between two trees and leaving a trail of up-turned dirt in its path before coming to a halt. Ford and Mabel slowly moved towards the ship with their weapons in hand, but they found it unnecessary as a boy stumbled out and coughed into a fist, on his hands and knees and ruffled from the crash.

“Oh geez, oh man, we’re dead. We’re dead. We survived, but we’re dead.” The boy moaned as he slowly stood up. He looked about Mabel’s age, had short brown hair, and wore jeans and a yellow t-shirt with white sneakers.

Mabel pocketed her grappling hook while Ford let his arms fall to his side, but he kept the weapon in hand, just in case. “Huh. That was… not what I was expecting.” Ford said, more to himself than to Mabel.

Mabel stepped forward with her hands up kindly and she cleared her throat, gaining the boy’s attention. He blinked at the two humans and Mabel said in a soft voice, “Uh, hi, I’m Mabel. Are you hurt?”

“What?” The boy asked. He seemed jittery from the crash, his eyes darting and his forehead glistening with sweat. “Uh, n-no. No, I’m fine. I’m…”

“MORTY!”

The boy groaned and squeezed his eyes shut as he tilted his head upward. “Yup, that’s my name. Morty.”

An older man in a white lab-coat with blue-white hair stumbled out of the spaceship, and not out of drunkenness for a change. “Morty, you little…”

“Sanchez.” Ford growled and covered Mable’s ears. He knew this guy had a foul tongue, and while Ford and his brother might have sailors’ mouths, at least he and Stan knew to censor themselves around the kids. Ford’s old friend didn’t.

The old man in the lab-coat looked at Ford and his eyes widened in shock before he grinned. “Oh, no way! Good to see you again, Fordsie!” He laughed, amused by the scenario in front of him. “Great, another genius. Mind giving me a hand with this piece of… erm, crap?”

Ford groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Fine, the sooner I can get you out of my home dimension, the better.”

The man Grunkle Ford had called Sanchez appeared shocked again and he dug around his coat. “Wait, wait, wait. Your home dimension?” Sanchez pulled out a white flat gun with a green bulb on top and he seemed to be reading off a tiny screen. “Huh. Dimension 46’\. This one’s way out of the loop. There’s no way I could’ve gotten you home with this thing. How did you manage to pull that off?”

“Long story.” Ford said and pocketed his hand in his trenchcoat.

“Grunkle Ford,” Mabel piped and smiled up at the visitor. “Who’s this?”

Ford looked down at his niece and decided to share this piece of his thirty-year-long journey in the Multiverse with her. “Sweetie, this is my old acquaintance, Rick Sanchez. Rick, this is my great-niece, my brother Sherman’s granddaughter, Mabel.”

“Oh, hey, nice to meet you, little lady.” Rick said with a small smile and then jabbed a thumb back at Morty. “That little screw-up is my grandson, Morty.”

“Oh, yeah, like you could do any better, Rick.” Morty huffed with crossed-arms over his thin chest.

“I could do better, Morty,” Rick said and rounded on his grandson. “You know what else I can do? I can also leave you behind on Asteroid 3924987, but I won’t. I can also feed you to a five-headed mega-bird from Bird-Person’s homeworld, but I won’t. I can also send you to the citadel and trade you in for a new Morty, but I won’t, as long as you quit being a pain in the ass.”

“Rick, please!” Ford hissed.

“It’s okay, Grunkle Ford, I heard worse when I went to get a snack and Stan was watching football.” Mabel giggled, remembering the other night when Stan’s team was losing and he let out a long stream of colorful swears that made him turn red when he realized Mabel had heard him.

“Of course you have.” Ford groaned and shook his head. “Well, let’s see what the damage is, Sanchez. What caused the crash? Did your micro-verse battery finally start a rebellion?”

“No, because they know if they do, I’ll get a new battery, Genius. When we came to this dimension through a wormhole we hit a mountain side and a part broke off here…”

The two old men examined the spacecraft and were discussing ways to fix it, meanwhile Morty walked up to Mabel and rubbed an arm nervously. “So, uh… I guess they met out in the Multiverse, huh?”

Mabel nodded; she didn’t know how these two old men knew each other or why these two humans were in a spaceship, but based on context clues, Morty’s guess made the most sense. “Wait, so you two are from another dimension?”

“Yeah, pretty much.” Morty said with a shrug. “This is 46'\, right? My dimension is C-137.”

“Wow, cool!” Mabel said with shining eyes that threw Morty for a loop. “So, what’s different over there? Was Benjamin Franklin a man and never accomplished anything? Are dinosaurs still alive? Oo! I bet your sky is lavender-purple all the time, right?!”

Morty laughed a little and rubbed his arm again. “Uh, no. It’s, I think, pretty much the same as yours. My Grandpa Rick says there’s an infinite number of realities that are just slightly different from one another. M-M-Maybe the difference between C-137 and 46'\ is so small and unimportant it’s not obvious.”

“Oh, okay,” Mabel peered over to watch Rick and Ford work together for a little bit and then she smiled back at Morty. “So, do you always go on adventures with your Grandpa Rick?”

Morty sighed in a shaky puberty-voice and nodded. “Yeah, he’s always making me go on these stupid adventures with him.”

“What?” Mabel gasped with a smile. “They’re not stupid! I’d love to go to a different dimension with my Grunkle Ford! I’ve already been on one with him and Grunkle Stan when they had to rescue me from Dimension Mab3L. The other mes were a little self-centered, but it was a lot of fun to punch myself in the face and rescue my great-uncles.”

“Yeah, but from the sounds of it, your - what did you say, Grunkle Ford? - is nice to you.” Morty pointed out. “My Grandpa Rick treats me like garbage all the time, but then again he treats everyone like garbage, so at least he’s only signaling me out to stay hidden from the Federation or whatever.”

“Oh.” Mabel said quietly and held her hands behind her back bashfully, unsure of how to respond, but she decided to try to make Morty feel better. “Well, my other great-uncle, Grunkle Stan, is a little tough sometimes, but that’s only because he cares about his family and is toughening us up for a tougher world. He’s my hero!”

“That sounds nice.” Morty said with a small smile. He didn’t think Rick cared about his family like this Stan guy, but Morty wasn’t in the mood to kill Mabel’s optimism. “I like your sweater, by the way.”

“Thanks!” Mabel grinned proudly. “I made it!”

Morty’s eyes widened. “Wow, really?” Mabel held out her arm so Morty could feel her sleeve. “Oh my God, that’s amazing! You’re really talented.”

“Hey, thanks! If you want, I can make you one!”

“R-R-Really? You’d do that for me?”

“Sure! What’s your favorite color?”

“Uh… y-yellow.”

“Got it!”

Ford and Rick walked up to the teenagers and the six-fingered researcher said, “Well, I’m afraid the ship lost a part we need, but luckily I have the materials we need to build one in the lab back home.”

“Great!” Mabel said and grinned. “Let’s go! So, how did you two meet, anyway?”

Ford and Mabel led the way with Rick and Morty closely behind. “We met about twenty years ago in a high-security prison. I remember feeling relieved to see another human. I had been without human contact for a little under two years at the time since I had been stranded on some desert planet.”

“Yeah, this nerd got into big trouble for the extinction of a few million species on Planet 8824816.”

“What?!” Mabel gasped and looked up at her great-uncle, unable to believe that he would cause such mass genocide. “Grunkle Ford, you didn’t?!”

“Of course I didn’t, Mabel.” Ford quickly reassured his niece. “That was the planet I thought was a sandwich. Anyway, at least I didn’t do what Rick was in for…”

“What did he do?”

“I purposely caused mass genocide on Sector 56, Dimension “”113.” Rick said in a scaringly monotone voice.

“What?!”

“Rick!” Ford and Morty both scolded at the same time.

“Hey, it was either me or the Valakawns!” Rick snapped back. “Those bloodsucking leeches didn’t see what hit them, until the Federation caught me hanging from a tree upside-down, passed out and drunk.”

“Alright, enough!” Ford said firmly. “Let’s just build the part we need so we can get you two back to your home dimension. And, Mabel, once they’re gone we’re going to patch the wormhole with alien adhesive.”

“Okay. Last thing we want is for Dipper to get stuck in Dimension Dipp-3R or something.”

“Who’s Dipper?” Morty asked quietly.

“My twin brother!”

“Oh, cool! I don’t have a twin, but I have met multiple versions of myself.”

“Hey, me too! I’ve met Table-Mabel, Explainble, Threebel, Military-Expert-Mabel, Brainbel, T-Rex-Mabel, Fire-Mabel, and even Anti-Mabel!”

“I’ve met an Evil-Morty with one eye-patch who worked for the worst Rick in the Multiverse. I’ve also… Well, let’s just say I’ve met a lot of mes.”

The two teenagers talked while the two old men chatted on ways to fix the ship as they got closer to the Mystery Shack. Rick looked up and down the place and then snorted, amused. “Huh. Not the kind of place I’d expect from Mr. Stick-In-The-Mud over here.”

“My brother had to make some… changes in order to pay off the mortgage.” Ford explained and led the way to the back door. He opened it and said, “My lab is downstairs behind the vending machine in the gift shop. I believe Soos is giving a tour, so it should be safe to enter.”

“Gift shop?” Rick laughed and poked Ford’s shoulder. “When did you get so soft?”

“I am not< soft.” Ford said dignified.

“You’re wearing a blue sweater with a gold six-fingered hand.”

“My niece made it for me!” Ford said proudly and puffed out his chest.

Mabel rolled her eyes with blushing chubby cheeks and a smile and decided to let the old guys fight. She took Morty’s hand and said, “Come on! I’ll show you my room! I have a huge sticker collection you’ll love!”

“Oh, okay!” Morty said and allowed her to drag her up to the attic; it was nice being dragged to something nice and safe rather than some new monster of a different dimension.

“But hey, you turned your lab into a gift shop.” Rick was saying while the teenagers did their own thing. “Least you’re making a profit.” Ford wasn’t sure if Rick was being sincere or not.

“Actually, it’s all my brother’s.” Ford said and waved the subject away. “We’re getting off track. Let's just get you and your grandson out of my dimension.”

“Geez, you used to be way more fun.” Rick said with sagged shoulders. “What happened to the guy who ranked up million on Lottocron Nine and got tattoos with octopus-armed piglets? What happened to the interdimensional criminal who once shot fifty Bureaucrats to save a fellow scientist’s ass?”

“He discovered what was most important, Sanchez.” Ford growled with his arms crossed over his chest.

“Oh, HO!” A voice laughed as he shook his head and left the kitchen. “I know this guy isn’t talking about Mr. Goody-Nerds-Shoes!”

Ford pinched the bridge of his nose. The last thing he wanted was for his twin and his old friend to meet, but it seemed like some greater being(s) really wanted this to happen, so here we go.

Rick grinned at the sight of a conman in his suit and fez, with a can in his hand, instantly giving Rick the vibe that this guy couldn’t be trusted but would be a hit at parties and wasn’t a total snitch. “Now THIS is what I’m talking about! Name’s Rick, Ford Two.”

Stan barked a laugh and shook his hand. “The name’s Stan, Genius. And please for the love of Moses you weren’t just talking about my brother?”

“Are you kidding, this guy was a total badass!” Rick jabbed a thumb back at the fuming scientist. “He was a total idiot, had no clue how the Multiverse worked, but he was always willing to barrel into whatever crap was out there and destroy some shit!”

“Okay, you and I need to talk.” Stan tossed him the can of soda and went into the kitchen to get some snacks. “I wanna hear more about what kind of crazy violent nomad Ford was back in the day!”

“You got it! Just tell me how the hell he ended up with a cool twin? What, did you inherit all the fun traits leaving him with hobbies like collecting alien stamps?”

Stan barked a laugh and was back, looping an arm around his skinny neck. “I love this guy! Now, please tell me you were there when he got his stupid tattoo.”

“Stanley,” Ford scolded. “We’re supposed to be working on building the part he needs so he can go home. Rick and his grandson are stranded here…”

“Please, I can make that piece of shit from scratch in my sleep.” Rick said. “And Morty’s fine. That niece of yours will keep his small brain entertained for hours.” He turned to Stan and asked, “You got any booze, we had a rough crash here and I need a drink.”

“I got a secret stash in my room,” Stan muttered. “I don’t like drinking with the kids here, but I guess you can have a shot of whisky to relax. Want some soda?”

“Sure, why not. There’s a bit in my flask to last.”

And the old men walked away for the ‘Employees Only’ part of the house, leaving Ford to grit his teeth in annoyance and then bite his lip in discomfort. This could only end one way and he was not looking forward to it.

To be continued...

[tev-the-random]

A Miraculous Sorting

(I’m writing this under the Christmas tree’s lights, because they take a lot less power than my room’s actual lights, and if I’m going to throw an all-nighter today, I want the electricity bill to be as cheap as possible.)

 You know something I really love? Pulling a Sorting Hat at random times. You’ll see me making a sandwich and rambling to myself as to why Rivaille Ackerman is a Hufflepuff. You’ll see me doing the dishes and quietly wondering why Mabel Pines is a Gryffindor. You’ll see me taking a shower and just arguing with myself about whether Ciel Phantomhive is a Ravenclaw or a Slytherin.

 The fact is: I love Harry Potter with all my soul and I’ll take any opportunity I get to sort random characters into Hogwarts Houses.

 So I thought to myself: hey, why not make a post about it? Mixing my most recent Thing-I-Won’t-Shut-Up-About-For-a-Few-Monthstm (Miraculous Ladybug) and my unexplainable need to analyse characters and put them in Hogwarts? Sounds cool to me. And that’s why you’re reading this. Also, I’m bored.

 Anyway, let’s get to it!

 Warning: be aware of Spoilers! If you haven’t finished Season 3, I’m afraid you’ll find a buzzling nest of spoilers here, so do be careful!

 Warning 2: Sorting is a very sensitive thing and can be interpreted in many ways. This is how I interpret it. Feel free to disagree, I’d love to discuss different opinions!

Marinette Dupain-Cheng/Ladybug – Ravenclaw

 This was an easy one. Despite her clumsiness and social awkwardness – which make her look a lot more air-headed than she actually is –, Marinette is a perfect match for Ravenclaw!

 First of all, we’ve been signed over and over again in the show to how she’s quick-witted, resourceful and strategic, and has got incredible problem-solving skills – even if she’s terrible at managing her time. Practically every episode shows us how quick she is to come up with plans to defeat the villains and how she always makes most of what she has – the Lucky Charm may be the most ridiculous object in the world, she’ll always manage to make a use of it.

 Not only as Ladybug, but also in her normal daily life, Marinette seems to be able to strategize and negotiate very well. Take as a few examples: how she manages to hide with Adrien using various strategies (Gorizilla); how she talks to Roland and convinces him to come visit Tom in his birthday (Bakerix); how she hides and runs away with Kagami and Adrien using various diversions (Heart Hunter/Loveater); how she pulls her – in my opinion – most brilliant and convoluted plan to retrieve Tikki and Plagg and keep her identity hidden (Kwami Buster). I mean, we get distracted by her silly shenanigans every now and again, but this girl has some pretty smart moves!

 She also operates the team work most of the time, directing when and where to use her fellow heroes’ powers. Not to mention she’s the one to choose who gets to have which miraculous, and she mostly seems to get it right – in this house, we do not talk about the stupidity that went down with Aspik, thank you very much.

 Furthermore, Marinette is just plain intelligent. She jammed the Wi-Fi signal using a microwave in Lady WiFi; she engineered her own diary-protection device in Darkblade; she made a home-made projector in The Mime; she neutralizes evil perfume with a chemical explosion in Princess Fragrance; she makes a freaking propeller in Glaciator. She was also mentioned in Ladybug (this name doesn’t get confusing at all) to always get good grades.

 As the series goes, Ladybug gets to become a much wiser person. She seems to learn from most of the problems the akumatized victims go through, as well as from her own mistakes – let aside all the Adrien stuff. Yeah.

 Last but not least, Marinette is exceptionally creative. I don’t think I need to exemplify this, do I? I mean… If you haven’t noticed how artistically inclined she is and how she is constantly praised for her creativity as a designer and as a superhero – again, think of the Lucky Charms –, I doubt we’re watching the same show.

 Not necessarily a Ravenclaw trait, but I’ll add it as a bonus: Marinette handles so many responsibilities at the same time, what a multitasker! She is an independent fashion designer, she does small fashion services – as seen in The Mime, for example –, she is a designer for both Kitty Section and (apparently) Jagged Stone, she babysits Manon and Chris, she helps her parents at the bakery, she studies – again, it’s said that she has good grades, so even if she spends a lot of time saving Paris, she also doesn’t lay off at school –, she makes time to keep her friendships together and she has all her responsibilities as Ladybug, and now as a Guardian. This is all some new level of bullshit a 15 year old human being shouldn’t have to deal with. I’m seriously amazed it took her three full seasons to have a breakdown.

Adrien Agreste/Chat Noir – Hufflepuff

 Ok, this was a bit more difficult. I was seriously torn between Hufflepuff and Gryffindor, but, after some deep thinking, I believe Hufflepuff is where Adrien belongs!

 Firstly, we’ve seen numerous times how inclusive Adrien is. He was, since day one, willing to give everybody a chance at friendship. This Nino boy I literally just met? My best friend. This Ladybug girl who fell from the sky out of nowhere? I’ll trust her with my life. This girl who hates me because of Chloé? I’ll give her my umbrella and she’s just a friend – Goddamnit Adrien. This Kagami girl I just fenced with and who almost killed me? Friend material right there.

 What makes Adrien’s inclusiveness most clear to me, however, is Lila. Despite everything she does, despite all her constant lying, despite her getting people he loves in trouble, he’s still willing to be her friend. We see in episodes like Chameleon, Oni-chan and Ladybug that he’s always willing to give Lila a second chance, to help her out when she needs it, to extend her the hand of friendship and to let her learn with it, because even if he knows she is a jerk, he still wants include her. Is that a bit of a stupid move at this point? Yes, it is. But we appreciate your try, Adrien.

 Another Hufflepuff trait that this boy has is patience. I mean, he lives with Gabriel Agreste, the cold critical father who shows affection – or any presence, really – only once every few months; he lives with Plagg, the demanding, pestering kwami who’s determined to not give two craps about doing his job; he’s childhood friends with Chloé “the arrogant and annoying and other things I can’t say out loud” Bourgeois; he’s trying to keep good terms with Felix, who’s competing for “most despicable brat of the year”; and he’s “friends” with Lila. All of this can only be handled by an enormously patient person.

 Despite that, Adrien is still somewhat just and fair. This can be seen in Despair Bear, as he says he’ll stop being friends with Chloé if she doesn’t start acting nicer. He also claims he won’t be friends with Lila anymore if she doesn’t get Marinette out of the trouble she caused. It’s also important to note episodes like Riposte, where Adrien’s determined to get a rematch with Kagami due to his believe that her loss was not fair.

 The thing that defines Adrien the most and that made me decide for Hufflepuff in the end, however, is his loyalty. Despite everything to ever come his way, he’s extremely loyal.

 Firstly, he’s loyal to Chloé, his childhood friend and, for the longest time, his only friend. We can see in the second part of the Origins episode that he won’t tell on Chloé’s behaviour because he “can’t throw her under the bus”. He instantly goes back to being her friend after the events of Despair Bear and seems to be the only one to get sad for her almost leaving Paris in Malediktator.

 The person Chat’s the most loyal to is undoubtedly Ladybug. We can see it in multiple instances, as he sacrifices himself in order to protect her in several episodes, stays by her side no matter what and, despite his own desire to know who Ladybug is, doesn’t actually actively try to find her identity (Chat Blanc aside) because that’s what she decided. Even if Chat Noir is constantly portrayed as her mere sidekick and gets the least attention of the duo, he doesn’t show jealousy. He trusts her.

 I’ll refrain from making the “Hufflepuffs are particularly good finders” joke.

Alya Césaire/Rena Rouge – Gryffindor

 Oh dear… I feel like this one almost reached a Hatstall! It was so hard! Her extreme curiosity and fascination with the world around her made me think of her as a Ravenclaw, while her ambition to get the best information for her blog and connection to the Fox Miraculous – the fox being an animal strongly connected to cunningness – seriously made me think about putting her in Slytherin. But again, after deep thinking, I do think Alya fits incredibly well in Gryffindor!

 Let’s start with the fact that Alya is an icon of bravery. She is daring and determined to the point where she is reckless. She is always ready to jump right into action, no matter how dangerous the situation is. If she can either get interesting footage and information or be of any help at all, she will be there, often putting herself in danger in the process. She rarely ever gets intimidated, nonetheless, showing that she has very strong nerve. This can be seen throughout various episodes, ever since Stoneheart and all the way to Feast!

 It’s safe to say that Alya has also got a sense of nobility, in a certain way. As seen in episodes like Stormy Weather, Sapotis, and Timetagger, this girl’s got a way with kids and is always willing to protect them. Rena Rouge also shows willingness to help save Paris no matter what, as seen in Sapotis and Syren, for example.

 I don’t know if this can be considered nobility as well, but I’ll just leave it here that Alya “Wingwoman” Césaire is a very determined best friend and will do about anything to set Marinette with the boy she loves. I can’t even exemplify this, because this happens way too clearly in almost every episode, folks.

 Well… Say what, I’m still confused about this. Alya confuses me. Does anyone have any comment to help me out with this one, please?

Nino Lahiffe/Carapace – Hufflepuff

 Ok, I won’t lie: part of this decision is because Nino’s just got too much of that bro vibe for me to imagine him anywhere else. But hear me up, I’ll tell you why he is an amazing Hufflepuff!

 First of all, Nino’s absolutely loyal. He’s loyal to Alya; always willing to protect her with his life – that’s how he got his miraculous, after all! –, but they still act as very good partners, friends and couple, and he recognizes she is strong on her own, too. He’s ready to help her out with her “wingmanning” – I’ll exemplify with Puppeteer 2.0 – and with her Ladybug investigations – as seen in Lady WiFi. They even parkour together in Miraculer! (Sorry, I just need more DJ-WiFi in my life)

 He’s also loyal to Adrien. We’ve seen it in several episodes: how he wants to make his friend happy and let him be free from his very strict household – good examples would be The Bubbler and Party Crasher –, showing that he is fair to his friend. It’s also important to mention episodes like Simon Says where, after the akuma attack happens, Nino’s first instinct is be to make sure Adrien is alright.

 Nino’s also shown himself to be quite loyal to Ladybug, as he never faltered to follow her instructions, even after he gets the Turtle Miraculous.

 His friendship with Adrien and Alya overall shows he’s also very inclusive. I mean, Adrien is friends with Chloé, the most hated girl of all school, but Nino just straight up offers to be his new best friend anyway. And although Alya keeps dragging him around to her messes, as soon as they start to talk and notice they have a lot in common, he falls in love with her (Animan).

 Nino is a hard worker as well. He is seen DJ-ing almost every party that showed up so far, and he showed himself as extremely dedicated to his movie project in Horrificator.

 As a generally laid back guy, Nino can be seen as someone very patient. It is quite difficult to tick him off, therefore it’s rare to see him mad or lashing out at someone. One might say he’s too relaxed at times…

Kagami Tsurugi/Ryuko – Slytherin

 Ok, first of all: I love Kagami. And I love Slytherin. So if anyone wants to shit on any of them, you’ll have to go through me first! Wands ready, buddy, I’m a duellist and I’m ready to fight!

 Kagami was another difficult one, but mostly because we rarely get to see anything from her personality, given how stoic and reserved she is at the beginning – besides, she’s a newer side character, so obviously she didn’t get to have that much screen time yet. But with what little we’re given, I’ve managed to figure she’d do nicely in Slytherin!

 Let’s start pointing out how ambitious Kagami is: during her first appearance in Riposte, she is determined to get to enter the most prestigious fencing school in Paris, and doesn’t even falter upon the challenge of defeating their most talented student; while episodes like Oni-chan show that she’s ambitious to get Adrien (and finish Lila, but that’s all of us). Her acts as Ryuko also goes to show this, as she’s clearly not willing to back down and is always willing to fight and win.

 However, she is not unfair, as seen again in Riposte, as she accepts her loss to Adrien was fair – it wasn’t, really –, even if it meant not getting what she wanted.

 Although Kagami doesn’t seem to be entirely selfish, she’s one to look after herself (the two are easily mistaken, hence this is seen as a Slytherin “bad trait”). We see it in Desperada, when she ditches fencing class to be able go out with Adrien; in Ikari Gozen, when she disobeys her mother in order to finally make friends; in Loveater, when she comments she doesn’t want to hurt Marinette, but would not give up on Adrien either.

 Ikari Gozen also shows that Kagami is level-headed, a natural leader, and rather cunning, given not only her strategies to deceive her mother in order to play the friendship game, but also her behaviour during the game and as Ryuko. This episode, along with Riposte and Frozer, for example, demonstrates that she strives to be the best at what she does.

 We see it in Animaetro how she doesn’t let herself be intimidated.

Kagami is decided, as seen in Frozer, Desperada and Loveater. She doesn’t hesitate.

Luka Couffaine/Viperion – Hufflepuff

 Oh, you thought I was going to finish this without sorting my snake boy?

 Easy one. Very easy. Once you put aside the thought of Snake = Slytherin and Blue = Ravenclaw, it gets quite visible how Luka is the perfect Hufflepuff!

 First of: he’s an extremely just person. One of the main themes of the episode Silencer is how he demands justice for his band and friends.

 Luka has also shown himself to be immeasurably selfless. This is seen in basically all of the episodes he has an appearance on, but I’ll name Captain Hardrock (he gives his  guitar pick to Marinette upon seeing that she likes it + stays behind to help her escape The Liberty), Desperada (he puts himself in harm’s way to help Ladybug and Adrien escape + he lets Adrien borrow his guitar without a flinch), Felix (literally everything he says in this episode), Miracle Queen (he sacrifices himself to the evil wasps) and Loveater (the scene where he drops his bicycle and his beloved guitar to comfort Marinette is some symbolic selfless beautiful shit and I’m about to cry).

 In the same theme, he is notably kind. He’s never a hostile person – safe for Silencer, but that was a special occasion – and always seems to greet everyone with a smile and – when he finds them – kind words. I’ll exemplify using Adrien: despite knowing pretty well that Marinette is in love with the model boy, Luka was never once bitter towards him, treats him like any other friend (watch Desperada, Frozer and even Chat Blanc. Watch closely) and even states that he’ll be happy for them if they end up together (Felix).

 I’ll also mention how supportive of a brother he is (Reflekdoll is our main example, though I need more Couffaine Siblings’ interaction, please) and how he gives Marinette a bicycle ride to the Grand Paris Hotel (Loveater) to help her; he didn’t need to do that at all.

 We can see that what he wants the most is for Marinette to be happy, even if it’s not with him. He’s there to support the people he loves no matter what and respects their wants and needs. Take some notes, Chat Noir (ok, kidding. I love you, Chat. But do take notes).

 Luka is the definition of patience. I mean… Let’s talk about Desperada, where, right after he confessed his heart to Marinette, she just ignores him and straight out treats him like trash to favour Adrien (I’m not blaming Mari, tho; I know she’s a confused little bean and didn’t mean any harm). What does he do? He shrugs it off with a smile and keeps his cool unfaltering. Furthermore, he never seems to expect anything from Marinette after that declaration.

 Plus, when he’s chosen to receive the Snake Miraculous, one of the things he does best is to watch patiently for the opponent’s moves to know the best strategy to take.

 Plus plus, he lives in a houseboat with Juleka, the Anxious Horror Loving Sister, and Anarka, the Chaotic Havoc Mum. I love the Couffaines, but living in The Liberty must be a nightmare sometimes.

 Another point to take in consideration would be how Luka is a hard-worker. Despite him being pretty chill and laid-back, we often see Luka composing and/or practicing for Kitty Section. Not only that, but we also see in Loveater he has a job as a delivery boy through Paris. On a bicycle.

 To wrap this up, I’ll say that Luka is pretty empathic. Just take his whole “reading people and translating them/their feelings into a song” thing we see in Captain Hardrock, Frozer and Loveater. I rest my case.

 *

 Phew, we’re done!

You headcanon these in different houses? I’d love to discuss it!

[detectivejigsawpines]

Ford vs. His Family-part 4 (Welcome home)

Everything hurt.

Yelling everything out like that left Stan feeling torn apart inside, like he’d ripped himself open down the middle and pulled his heart out, laying it on the table in front of him for all to see-and it not only hurt...he was terrified.

Specifically, he was terrified about what his brother would do next.

Probably not laugh at him, he wasn’t that much of a bas...ketcase.

...But maybe say something scornful to trample Stan’s heart, bared and laid out for him as it was, into the dust.  Or walk away and go hide in the basement-that was certainly Ford’s style, just run away from things he didn’t want to deal with and try to pretend they hadn’t happened-

He definitely didn’t expect Ford to finally let out a long exhale, reach into his coat, and pull out an old, crumpled photograph, which he set on the table between them.

Even though it was faded and torn and stained, it was obvious who was in it, and what boat they were standing on.  And it hadn’t been in the house for the last thirty years; Stan would have seen it if it was.

Stan stared at it for a few seconds...and then gave Ford a disbelieving look.

“You just happened to be carrying this in your pocket when I came here?”

His brother shrugged, and a few spots of color rose in his cheeks.  “I didn’t realize it at first either.”

He let the implication ‘but I kept it all this time’ hang in the air between them unsaid.

So.  Ford had missed Stan enough to keep one of their old photos, even when he got sent to another dimension.

It wasn’t much...but it was something.  It was maybe enough to make Stan’s heart-treacherous, optimistic piece of crap that it was-jump a little in his chest, and stir with the beginnings of hope.  But he tried to push it down again just as quickly, because every time he did that with Ford it just meant fresh disappointment, betrayal and hurt.

Maybe this photo meant Ford wasn’t completely indifferent to him-but it didn’t get rid of the possibility that he hated him instead.  And Stan wasn’t too clear on which one was worse, because while arguably someone hating you meant you were still important to them, as opposed to their not caring about you at all, in his experience that also meant they were more likely to actively try to hurt you.

*********

Stan didn’t look convinced.

He at least didn’t seem ready to start throwing punches again, but his expression hadn’t relaxed either.  There was still visible tension in his shoulders and his eyes. Not to mention, Ford realized, pain.

It wasn’t something he’d allowed himself to think about too hard, but Stan was in just as much pain and fear of being hurt again as he was.

Somehow, even though he still wasn’t sure what to say, that made wanting to say the right thing to help fix this a little bit easier.

Ford sighed, running a hand through his hair.  “I may have been...a little too hasty in my initial decision about the house.”

Stan looked surprised...but then he asked sarcastically, “May have been?”

“...You’re not going to make this easy for me, are you?”

He smirked a little.  “Nope.”

Again, Ford swallowed his pride.  “I was too hasty in my decision.”

“That’s better.”

Ford rolled his eyes, but continued, “I had convinced myself that the solution to my problems with Bill, and to finding out that I was back in my own home but no longer in the time that I left, was to bring things as close to how I remembered them as possible.  Which...was not realistic or viable. And it was unfair. So. I am willing to discuss other options.”

Stan sighed, releasing even more of his tension.  “...Thanks.”

“I maintain my stance that what you did was incredibly reckless.”

It seemed only fair to be honest about what he felt.  Stan bristled again, but Ford hurried on, “If you know about Bill, and what he wants to do if he finds a way into this dimension, then you should understand why.  No one person is worth risking the fate of the world, and you had no way of knowing if I was even alive.”

The glare lessened.  But Stan shook his head stubbornly.

“I’d still do it again.  If it meant there was any chance I could find you and bring you back, I’d do it.  Maybe you wouldn’t have had a problem leaving me there, but I couldn’t have lived with myself.”

Ford gulped.  Put like that, it did sound...a little more than a little extremely heartless.

And therefore not something he should ever have expected from Stanley, for all his faults.

At last, he swallowed and said hoarsely, “Your stubborn loyalty defies logic sometimes.”

“It does not-it defies logic all the time!”

He rolled his eyes again, and let out a croaky kind of laugh.  “You’re impossible.”

“And you’re a knucklehead.”  The retort came out in what seemed like a knee-jerk response; as soon as it did, though, Stan’s eyes widened nervously, and he shrunk back in on himself, looking like he was ready for Ford to lash out at him again or say something full of icy hostility-

Ford just laughed again, even more genuinely.  When he finished he admitted, voice soft, “...I don’t think I could have left you there either.  Believe it or not.”

Stan clenched his teeth down on his lower lip, eyes shining behind his glasses, before he twisted to the side, burying his face in his hand.

For the first time in forever, Ford reached out to his brother, gently touching his shoulder.  To his relief, Stan leaned into his touch; he squeezed the muscle, while rubbing a circle in his back with his thumb.

********

It wasn’t hugging it out like Mabel had ordered them to, and there was still a lot of old crap they had to dig up and talk about even though it would hurt...but hearing that Ford would have done the same thing if he’d been the one sucked into the portal was still something.  It was like there’d been an old, rusty razor blade stabbing him in the heart all this time, getting twisted and digging in further every time Ford gave him a cold stare or made a cutting remark about his business or the size of his gut or how he spent his time with the kids-and at last, it had been removed.  The area was still very sore and probably infected, but maybe now there was a chance for it to heal.

“‘M sorry,” he whispered, without looking at Ford.  “I’m so, so sorry, I-”

His shoulder was squeezed again.  “I know. I am too.”

********

From the doorway, Dipper pulled his sister away before she could squeal with excitement and spoil the moment.

“They need privacy, Mabel,” he whispered as he hustled her downstairs.  “Let’s...make them a celebratory dinner or something.”

Mabel covered her mouth with her hands and released her delighted squeal into them.  “Let’s make pie! Grunkle Stan loves pie! And bacon, let’s make bacon! Oh man, I don’t know what kind of food Grunkle Ford likes!  We should have asked him what kind of food he likes!”

“We spent the last two days not talking to him, remember?  We’re just gonna have to guess.” Dipper towed her towards the kitchen, on the way grabbing Soos and Wendy.  “Do you guys know anything about cooking? They seem like they’ve made up, or at least started to, so we’re gonna celebrate.”

“Well, my grandma’s tried teaching me how ta make burritos a few times,” Soos said, chubby face lighting up happily, “and they’ve only been charred on the outside and raw on the inside, like, seven out of ten times, so those are definitely good odds!  This is a once-in-a-lifetime event, it’s gotta be an opportunity where my thirty-percent success rate will be a thing!”

Wendy shrugged.  “We don’t cook much at home, but I can open cans and things.  I can give it a shot.”

“This will be the best celebrating-our-grunkles-making-up dinner EVER!” Mabel proclaimed, giving everyone a round of high-fives.

****

Twenty minutes later

Everyone ran screaming, searching frantically for where Stan kept the fire extinguisher, as two-foot-high flames rose from the stove.

“LOOK FOR A BUCKET!” Mabel yelled, running to a cupboard and throwing it open-only to have a pile of junk fall on her.

Soos flung open a cupboard and filled every cup, bowl and tupperware he could find with water, before throwing them at the fire, which sizzled but determinedly continued to burn.

“How!”  Wendy yelled, looking under the sink for the extinguisher, “How the heck did we manage to do this using tortillas and beans?!”

Dipper scrambled onto the counter and grabbed a pitcher, which he filled to the brim before running at the stove and hurling the contents.

Water splashed everywhere...including right in the faces of their grunkles, who had just entered the kitchen to see what all the commotion was.

Everyone froze in a mosaic of horror.

Water dripped from Stan and Ford’s glasses and the tips of their noses.

Dipper’s mouth flapped helplessly.

Mabel extricated herself from the mess, and the broom clattered against the linoleum.

At last Soos coughed.

“Sorry dudes.”

Stan examined the chaos, and snorted.

“We leave you knuckleheads alone for just a little while…”

“Dare I ask what... this is?”  Ford prodded gingerly with the tip of his blaster at the twisted blackened mess on top of the stove, which resembled something out of a horror movie.

“We were trying to make celebratory burrito pies,” Mabel said, standing up.  “...It didn’t work as well as we thought it would.”

“Obviously.”

She flushed, and looked at her feet.  Ford felt his heart twinge a little.

“Who wants Chinese?” Stan asked, heading for the phone. “I’m gonna order takeout.”

****

Ten minutes later

Working together, they were able to finish cleaning up the mess just before the delivery guy got there with their food.  Then they gathered together in the living room to eat.

The only real chair was the yellow armchair, which of course Stan claimed for himself, with Dipper and Mabel perching on each of the arms.

Mabel was startled when Ford came over to her side, where the dinosaur skull was, and asked softly, “...Is this seat taken?”

Part of her wanted to say that yes, it was for either Soos or Wendy.  The fact that he’d called her relationship with Dipper suffocating, and taken it for granted that she’d be fine with having her brother unexpectedly taken away from her without even discussing it with her or their parents first, still stung.

But the nervousness in his eyes, and the fact that he was probably trying to be apologetic in his own way, were enough to make her shrug and say, “Nope.”

Ford smiled, perching on the skull with his carton of Chinese food.

Stan pulled the remote control out from between the cushions, and flipped the television on, going through a few channels before settling on some mindless game show.

And for the first time in days, things in the Pines household were comparatively peaceful.

********

There are more details that need to be dealt with, of course, but at least for now they just want to enjoy some quality time together without anger or tension or resentment or excessive hurt. Since the rift has been taken care of, Ford finds it easier to relax with his family without worrying about Bill disturbing them again. He begins watching Stan's tours more, making his brother growl that he's gonna start charging him for admission. But he doesn't seem too serious about it. Ford retorts by complaining about the silliness of some of the exhibits-the names alone are ridiculous. I mean, a Cornicorn? Really? Stan gives an understanding nod, and says that ohh, of course, he should give them more serious, scientific names, like the plaidypus, or beard cubs, or the leprecorn. Ford blushes sheepishly, and stops complaining about the quality of the exhibits.

He also tries to make things up with Mabel by letting her paint a turkey on his hand, and telling her about some of his adventures in other dimensions. He apologizes to both twins for hurting them and trying to split them up before they were ready for it, and he and Dipper agree to maybe talk about the apprenticeship again when he's at least had a chance to graduate high school.

By the time of the twins' birthday, things are relaxed enough for Stan and Ford to work together to plan a surprise party for them in the yard. And when the kids go home the next day, Stan's a little nervous about getting kicked out despite everything, and wonders if he should've taken them up on their offer after all, but when Ford makes no effort to make him leave or close down his business, he allows a little bit of his newfound optimism to stay.

If Bill had any hair, he’d probably be tearing it out by the roots, but nobody cares what he feels.

[aboxfullofocs]

Prison Days - Year Three

"So, do you think Jonah will be sour now that Mabel’s leaving?” Sage joked as the two of us worked the morning shift on the cafeteria.

“You seem happy about the idea of the big black gay guy being suddenly single,” I pointed out.

I don’t like Sage to be fully honest. Probably because Sage reminds me of myself, only with a lot more bark and a lot more promiscuous. Much like I did all my life Sage uses his appearance to get off the hook and his inteligence to lie and manipulate everyone on his way.

It’s quick and its easy, but in the end, it’s not the best way.

“Well, no one messes with Jonah, that’s for sure,” he shrugged. “I wouldn’t mind being under his wing.”

“You know Jonah longer than me, Sage,” I sighed. “You know well he’s going to save himself for Mabel.”

“But a man’s a man!” Sage laughed.

“And Jonah is Jonah,” I looked at him. “Why you so desperate anyway? You have woohooing rights with half of the men in this establishment.”

“That’s not true,” Sage laughed. “I haven’t had the pleasure of eating your arse yet.”

I lifted a brow. “It’s already taken, I’m a afraid.”

“Oh, yea, by that cop boyfriend that broke up with you, right?” And he grinned. “Jonah told me. He been calling you recently?”

I flinched and looked over my shoulder at him. I hate that he is smart, coniving little-

I took a deep breath and returned to mixing the eggs. 

“Maybe we should stick together,” Sage shrugged. “You’re lonely, I’m weak. I could relieve you of any pent up-”

“Drop it Sage or I’ll drop you,” I warned.

“Just an offer, think about it,” and he winked at me. “I need protection and you need a friend.”

I rolled my eyes and returned to work. “I have one, he’s called Jonah.”

I could still feel Sage’s eyes on my back. “I should have woohooed an alien, you know, instead of just smuggling their crap.”

“We’re not that great,” I chuckled and flipped the pan with the mixture to the frying pan.

~K.E.

[discipleoflilith-blog]

Billdip week2017

This is a Billdip fanfic. I do not own anything other than the creativity of this story. I wrote this for reading on your side and writing creativity on my end. Boyxboy. NOTHING DIRTY. SFW Per requirements for this activity. Don’t like it don’t read it. Be grown up about it. Only supportive critics up in here. Cause I’ll remove and block like a boss. Y’all better roll on otherwise. Don’t waste your time or mine. Others: Snaps fingers and finger guns you. Enjoy. If you like I may continue. Expect more shorts.  

Come on dip dop! We are so going to miss all the best stuff because your taking forever! Mabel yelled from the bottom of the stairs to her twin still changing into his outfit. Yeah yeah yeah! I'm hurrying ok. Mabel tapped her black ballet shoes that she turned into ninja shoe's. She dressed as a ninja while Dip was dressing as a pirate. The plan was to wow everyone at the festival with the always great ninja vs. pirate theme. She jumped as Dipper jumped off the steps landing near her wearing his outfit. He looked good in the black shirt and brown pants. His sash was dark blue and he jingled a bit when he walked thanks to the little metal trinkets on his hips. His bandana was plain blue but he had it wrapped around his left wrist. She had to admit he looked good.

You finally ready!? Mabel was about to burst and even she knew she had to hurry or she might explode. Dipper sighed looking at his sister. He could see how excited she was even through all the black of the ninja outfit. Her eyes almost sparkled with her joy. He couldn't help but smile and get as excited. Alright Mabes lets go. They saved up over the winter and had been saving everything they got once they reached Gravity Falls. After turning 16 they both got little odd jobs which paid well and they even got paid for doing other things like showing up at Parties showing off that they where nearly identical twins. Raggedy Ann and Ragged Andy had been very popular among children's parties. Dipper triple checked his pocket to make sure his money was safe. Dipper grabbed Mabel and they both ran out the door. Dipper planned ahead and got his drivers license as soon as he could after there sixteenth birthday and then got his motor cycle license which was a bit harder because not many people he knew rode a motor cycle. But he did what he could.

They ran through the small walk that had few people because of how early they where. Dipper saw a fortune telling tent and ran to it with Mabel close behind. It had a big yellow triangle on it with an eye. Mabel was focused on the blue side of the tent with the same symbol. Dipper rolled his eyes and shook his head. Says they won't be open until 3. Psshhh. We should be able to at least run this festival twice before then and have done everything at least twice. Dipper crossed his arms. Mabel put her hands on her hips and leaned to the side as she smirked at her brother. Oh no, what are you thinking? I know that face and I'm up for a challenge. Dipper smiled. I bet I could do that and be here before this tent is set up and open even bro bro! What say you pirate!? Can you keep up with this NINJA!?

Dipper dropped his arms to his sides as he hummed in consideration as he walked around Mabel eyeing her. Who said I wanted to come back to a phony fortune teller? I mean they have so much here already. He rolled his eyes at the thought that she wanted him to come back to the fortune teller. It was all a bunch of Hocus Pokus and mirrors. They never knew anything right. It was all guessing and simple replies that pointed them to the right things. Who needed fake when you knew that real magic was afoot here IN Gravity Falls. Mabel pouted. Come on Dip I might find out how to find the person I'm meant to be with! Who knows. Mabel nudged him with her elbow. Maybe even you may get some tips on where and when you will find someone for you. Come on.

Dipper rolled his eyes and then he noticed someone with bright gold hair Wearing a loose fitting Ghillie shirt like his. And he was talking to a guy with bright blue hair. The guy noticed Dipper looking at him and before he could look away the guy winked at him smiling. Dipper smirked as Mabel was talking and moving her arms he raised his brow at the guy and blantly looked him up and down then settled on looking him right in the eyes as he made a kiss motion at him. The blonde guy looked shocked then covered his mouth laughing. The guy with blue hair stopped talking and looked frustrated as he looked over in time for Mabel to look over at them both. Dipper turned and yelled out your on Mabel. He heard Mabel yelling about how he was cheating.

He laughed as he yelled back. Your not a lady ninja your just my sister in a ninja suit with no ninja skills! He spun around to run backwards to fend off Mabels attacks. Both of them didn't notice the two watching them fade away into the crowd as they both smiled and whispered about dreams and finally finding the treasure hidden in the town of mystery. Mabel and Dipper separated at one point. Picking what they wanted to do and skipping stalls that had nothing they wanted or interested them. Yo Dip check out this stall. Mabel was jumping and he ran over to see what she had found. Whats up Mabes? Check out these cool little wooden pieces! Look I found a cool shooting star! Dipper thought it looked cool how it was carved and cut. He searched the table then his eyes rested on the little wooden pine tree.

It wasn't flashy but it was still cool with how it had cuts to show what kind of tree it was. They both paid for their little trinkets and as they spun around both of them ran into a solid warm surface. Oof~ Ugh, what? Both of them said. Dipper tried to step back but found he was wrapped in warm arms keeping him close to what he know knew was a warm chest. Dipper looked up and saw gold eyes and blond hair staring back at him. Well hi there Pine Tree! Like what you see!? Dipper blushed. Ummm. Dipper was in shock as this guy kept him in his arms and turned with him to walk. Come on lets have some fun before I have to open my tent with my brother. I want to spend some time with you. So lets make this a date huh? Dipper couldn't figure this guy out and while deep in thought he wason auto pilot. So he simply whisper. Ok.

They got some ice cream and talked and Dipper found he started to like this guys Company. He finally got up the courage to ask. So whats your name? The guy laughed. Nu, uh, uh. You didn't give me the magic word and what's in a name.? Dipper frowned. Hey if we are going to get closer I need to know your name at least. I don't even know your age. How do I know your not some guy trying to be a pervert or something? Dipper looked at him seriously then. The guy seemed to visibly frown. I don't look THAT old do I? Don't make me out to sound like a creep! I haven't touched you! In fact your the one who was in my chest not even half an hour ago smelling me!

Also if you where worried about that you wouldn't be on a date with me! Dipper shrugged. Your right. He turned to walk in a different direction. The guy didn't notice right away as he heard him talking to himself then he heard him stop and catch up to him. RUDE~! Dipper ignored him and kept walking like he was leaving. Come on you can't be this serious. Dipper kept walking and finished the rest of his ice cream. Come on my name can't be that important to you. Dipper looked everywhere but at the Blonde. This seemed to be agitating the blond.  He finally pulled on Dippers arm to stop him from leaving completely giving him a pleading look. If I tell you my name and age will you stay? Dipper turned to face him. The guy was taller then him and when he looked at dipper like that he wanted to make the blonde feel better. Dipper sighed and ran his hands through his hair. Only if you tell me your name and age. He leaned on one foot crossing his arms. The names Bill. I am 18 going on 19 this year with my twin Brother Will. We're the cypher twins! He looked at Dipper like he expected him to be jumping up and down squealing. Dipper smiled as he nodded and grabbed his hand to hold as he walked with him towards the spot they left off on. Dipper checked his phone. It's 2:30 I need to meet my sister at the Fortune tellers tent.

Bill seemed to get more excited when Dipper said that. THAT'S OUR TENT! Come on, let's hurry then! They quickly walked side by side in a comfortable silence as they made there way to the tent. Dipper didn't want to be mean but he hated fortune telling. It was just one big scam to him. But he walked Bill to his tent anyways. A dates a date. This guy was so much hotter than anyone else Dipper has ever "dated" before. Guys and girls alike. Bill stopped suddenly. Hold on I'm hungry I want to find something to eat before we get to the tent to work. Ice cream is great but not filling at all. Dipper spotted a vender not far away. He scooted Bill out of his way and told him to find a place to wait for him. Dipper went to see what they had. He got them two hot dogs each with chili and cheese sauce and a family size bag of Doirtos. They ate as they walked. Bill liked the Doritos more than the hot dog so Dipper gave him the whole bag and ate his hot dog and they shared a drink.

They made it to the tent and Dipper turned to say good bye to Bill. But he couldn't find him. Crap maybe he wasn't watching while he walked eating the chips. Dipper was passing a booth as he walked back tracking to find Bill. When someone grabbed him and pulled him into the booth. Dipper spun around to see Bill smiling and looking at him. I'm kind of glad you didn't freak out over who I am and all. Before we go and do our own thing I was wondering. Dipper looked at him waiting for him to continue. Bill closed his eyes and took a breath. Would you like to ma-. Dipper cut him off by giving him a kiss. After a second Bill wrapped his arms around him and deepened the kiss more. Dipper shivered and Bill hummed as he used his tongue to poke at Dippers lips begging for entrance. Dipper gasped at the contact. And Bill used that moment to slipped his tongue into Dippers mouth. They both Gasped at the energy between them.

Dipper leaned back to breath neither of them knew how long they had been like that. But neither of them wanted to let go of the other. So they held each other for a few minutes more and they caught there breath. Dipper was the first to speak. So. He raised his eye brow for emphasis. You want my number? Bill broke out in a loud laugh. When he stopped he looked at Dipper. Before he could respond Dipper spoke again with confidence. Don't judge me. I'm a pirate. And I know what kind of booty I want. Bill lost it then. Dipper wrote his number down on his Bandana and slid it off his wrist and onto Bills as he ducked out of the booth Bill pulled him into.

Bills eyes went Wide as he noticed his Pine Tree jump out of the booth. WAIT! He jumped up and pushed the curtain aside but he couldn't see his little Pine Tree through the crowd. And once he pulled the curtain back a crowd of teenage girls noticed him and squealed. OMG IT'S BILL CYPHER! BILL YOUR SO HANDSOME! CAN WE GET AN AUTOGRAPH!? IS YOUR BROTHER WITH YOU!? WHERE IS WILL!? CAN WE GET A PICTURE!? Bill saw Pine Tree pointing towards his own wrist mouthing something. Bill looked down and noticed Pine Tree's Bandana and gasped when he saw a phone number and name. Bill smiled as he looked up and watched Pine Tree enter the cypher tent unnoticed by the crowd just as a little ninja entered from the other side as well.

Bill through his arms out and yelled at the top of his lungs. WHO WANTS THAT AUTO GRAPH!? 

[priincesspacificaarchive]

Love Me [Kids Soulmate AU]

Drabble Asks||(not CURRENTLY accepting, DC sent me SO MANY AND I MUST DO THEM ALL THE FORCE OF DIPIFICA COMPELS ME)

Leave a “Love Me” in my ask, and I’ll write a fluffy drabble about our characters.

[This got really, REALLY long, so there’s a read more. Also idk if this is fluff??? It kinda ENDS in fluff??? I can’t really write fluff. Angst is waaaaaay more up my alley. Have some Weirdmaggedon Dipifica.]

So he was her soulmate. That didn’t mean she was in love with him, right? There were people with soulmates that were better off friends, right?

Whatever. It didn’t matter, because there was no way she was going to fall for that lame Pines kid.

Out of seven billion people in the entire freaking world,  he had to be her stupid soulmate.

And now that stupid world seemed to be ending, and the color seemed to get sapped out of the world.

While she would never admit it out loud, it terrified her.

If the color went away, then so did Dipper Pines.

In all his time trying to save Mabel, the color didn’t fade once, which made Mabel’s bubble hard to look at.

Of course, whenever he saw a new color he thought of her. The entire reason he could see color in the first place. He still wished that it could’ve been Wendy.

Up until Wendy-that-wasn’t-actually-Wendy turned into bug and maggots before his eyes. He would manage without Wendy being his soulmate after that. And he had come to treasure her friendship in a way he didn’t think he would’ve before that summer.

The color didn’t fade, which meant she wasn’t dying, or close to death. And for once his heart didn’t feel the need to pound against his ribs as if it wanted to break from his chest.

She screams when he bursts through the door, fists held at either side, ready to jump and claw his eyes out with her nails. But it’s nothing. Dipper, Mabel, the lumberjack girl, and the gopher man from the gift shop.

Her eyes land on Dipper, and her heart stutters. She wants to scream again. To yell and throw a tantrum and tell her heart to stop. It wasn’t fair. 

She watches their reunion with Stan, and she feels any strength she had, any color that filled her, drain. And while she can still manage enough sass about the potato sack she had to wear, it felt empty to her. 

Her parents were stone statues, probably still alive, and part of that evil corn chips’s stupid throne. The boy who was supposedly her soulmate was ramping her fellow refugees up to fight Bill with his twin sister, and while she has felt alone her entire life, the loneliness had never felt this heavy before.

In all of the commotion of turning the Shack into a robot, Dipper doesn’t pay much attention to color. He’s too busy trying to keep them all alive.

But he doesn’t blame Paicifca for staying out of the way. Most of it was heavy lifting, no one wanted her input on any ideas, and everyone just expected her to keep to the sidelines.

Nonetheless, he wishes that she’d show some of that fight he’d seen in her back at the mansion. That she’d be out here, proving everyone wrong, sweeping around and helping wherever she could. But that wasn’t who she was. Maybe someday.

It’s somewhat a miracle and somewhat fate, and somewhat awkward when they end up having free time at the same time. But he needed a little break, and Pacifica had nothing but break time.

“Hey.” He says, trying to keep his cool as his heart kicks up to triple speed and every color seems to get brighter, her crystal eyes seeming to glow in the firelight.

She sits on a log by the fire, having surrendered to the cold and wearing Mabel’s llama sweater. A can of Pitt Cola dangles from her finger tips, and she doesn’t look up from the fire when she mutters back. “Hey.”

He clears his throat, sits next to her on the log. “Should we talk the plan over again?”

“You’ve talked about nothing but for two days. I’ve got it down cold, thanks.”

Okay, so maybe he had, and maybe she knew it as well as he did, but she didn’t have to be so cold about it, did she? “Did I…do something?”

She just shakes her head. “No. But maybe that’s the point.”

She sounds so unsure, like she doesn’t know what she wants. Which was outrageous. She was Pacifica Northwest, she always knew what she wanted, and she always got it. “Did you…want me to do something?”

“I don’t know, okay?” She breathes the words, so quietly he isn’t sure he heard her right.

“I thought we were pretending this didn’t happen.”

“Yeah. And then the color started draining from the world.”

“Wait, what?”

“How many times have you almost died since it happened, Dipper?” She still won’t look at him. He doesn’t know why that feels like a bat to the heart.

“Probably a handful, more so in the past few days…” he trails off. “Why?”

“You do know that when-” she cuts herself off, swallows. “When your soulmate dies…The world loses color again.”

Dipper’s eyes widen slightly, but then he nods, “Oh.” It’s all he can think to say. Of course he knew. But to remember that Pacifica would see…would know the same thing. He really almost died when Bill had his body. What did she see then?

“Yeah.” She doesn’t offer him any more.

“So you…you know when I’m near death then.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m not surprised I haven’t seen it yet.”

She crushes the can in her fist, and the sound spooks him. “Yeah.”

“Is that all you can say?”

“Right now?” And her voice is angry, but he can see the tears she’s holding back, “Yeah.”

“Are you mad that I’ve almost died?”

“Well if you’re supposed to be my soulmate I don’t really want you dying, okay. I like seeing color, thanks. Would really appreciate it if you’d let it stay that way.”

“Didn’t think you cared.”

“Am I not allowed to now or something?”

“Just…” and he runs his fingers through his hair, “I didn’t think you cared.”

She stands from the log, tosses the aluminum can into the fire, “I need to sleep if we’re ambushing tomorrow.” She turns away from him, heads for the tents.

“Pacifica.” He says, and she stops dead. “I like seeing color too. So don’t-”

“Yeah. I’m less likely to die than you are, Pines.” And she’s gone.

She’s a tapestry, caught in limbo between life and death, and he suddenly understands what she was talking about when she said that color drained from the world.

He’s being chased in the Fearymid, and she’s stuck as a tapestry, and she can still see the color fading. It’s the worst feeling she’s ever known. She’s stuck, and the color is draining, and the loneliness sets in again.

They make it out alive, and she gets to give him his birthday present. She’s glad he likes it so much. The colors seems to vibrate, and his smile is bright like the sun.

He’s leaving. They’re leaving, he and Mabel. But he has to say goodbye. They were soulmates, attached by the red string of fate, and he was going to honor it. She wasn’t who he thought she was.

“Have a good time in California.” How did she know it was him?

“Y-yeah. Eighth grade should be a blast.” His voice drips in sarcasm, despite his stuttering.

“You’re the only one that would know to find me here.” She means the hidden room. The paintings. Why did she come back here? “Martin let you in, right? Dad wouldn’t of, savior of the world or not.”

It’s his last day in Gravity Falls. Her last day in the mansion she grew up in. They were both moving on to new adventures.

“Yeah. Martin.” He steps over the threshold, takes a seat next to her. And suddenly he’s back to that night. Begging her for help, begging for her to save them. “You’re a savior yourself, you know.”

“I pulled a stupid lever. You faced off against a stupid dream demon. I think there’s a difference there.”

“You disobeyed your parents, fought against a sound you’ve been trained to obey your whole life. I’d take a dream demon over the courage that would take any day.”

“You have to leave soon, don’t you?”

“Yeah.”

“Dipper?”

“Yeah?”

“I don’t hate you. Anymore.”

He didn’t expect that. “Yeah? Well. Me neither.”

“I don’t exactly like you either though.”

“Yet. We’re soulmates. Plenty of time.”

“Yeah. Soulmates.”

He stands, brushes off his shorts, adjusts his cap.”

Before he leaves, “See you next summer, Pines.”

“Bet on it, Northwest.”

Crap. Maybe she was falling for him after all.

[animationnut]

To Gravity Falls, From Piedmont: Chapter 24

Summary: It’s a long way until next summer. Until then, Dipper   and Mabel share their daily antics and life problems with their lifelong friends and attentive great-uncles through an endless string of   e-mails. Distance makes the heart grow fonder after all, and there’s no place Dipper and Mabel love more than Gravity Falls.

                                                     Chapter List

To: Grunkle Ford (Highsixer)

From: Dipper Pines (GhostHarasserfan)

Subject:  Natural remedies

Just a curious question for you. Do you know of any natural remedies for acne? I tried the Internet for some answers but I don’t really know where to start. Plus I don’t know who’s trying to mess with me. I could try drugstore products but again, don’t know where to start.

Any input you have would be great. Thanks!

“I’m not going to school tomorrow.”

Mabel, who was sitting on the edge of the white porcelain sink, gave her head a sharp shake. “Sorry. I think I heard you wrong. I could have sworn you said you didn’t want to go to school.”

“I can’t go out in public like this!” cried Dipper, unable to tear his gaze away from the oval-shaped mirror. “Everyone will stare!”

“I think they already stare. You wear a winter hat and we’re in California where the sun almost always shines.”

“When they look at Wendy’s ushanka, it’s with curiosity. But when they catch a load of Mount Everest on my face it’s going to be with disgust!”

On Dipper’s chin, smack in the middle, was a bright red pimple. It stood out against his pale skin and there was a collection of blackheads surrounding it. Dipper poked at the acne gingerly, flinching as it throbbed beneath his touch.

“I think touching it is just going to make it worse,” remarked Mabel.

Dipper hastily lowered his hand. “Ugh, this sucks.” He grabbed a washcloth from the cupboard behind him and soaked it with cold water from the tap. He pressed it against his pimple and slouched against the wall. “I have to make this go away by tomorrow.”

“You’re not the first teenager to have acne, bro,” Mabel pointed out.

“I’m already self-conscious enough, this isn’t helping matters,” said Dipper miserably. “I’m just going to be paranoid that every time someone looks at me all they’ll see is this dumb pimple.”

“Hey, it’ll be fine,” soothed Mabel. “We’ll do what we can to get rid of it. You’re also not the first teenager to worry over acne. It’s the plague of puberty.”

“Definitely not the part I looked forward to,” muttered Dipper. “How come I’m the first one to have to deal with this?”

Mabel grinned. “I got the braces. It’s only fair you get the pimples.”

“Fair point,” conceded Dipper. He dug through his shorts pocket and removed his phone. “I’m going to do some investigating.”

“Is it okay if I take Waddles for a walk?” asked Mabel.

Dipper waved her away. “Oh yeah. I’ll be fine. Just having a fit. I’ll get over it…hopefully.”

Mabel patted him on the shoulder. “Seriously, try not to worry about it. Society’s standards of beauty is way overrated. I’ll be back shortly to see what cure for acne you’ve discovered.”

She skipped out of the bathroom, calling out for her pig. Dipper took her place on the counter, legs kicking idly as he searched through the numerous Internet results for some home remedy solutions.

“Wait, toothpaste? Is that a thing?”

…

After circulating through her neighbourhood for twenty minutes, Waddles happily trotting by her side and sniffing every single tree and bush as he tended to do, Mabel began the trek for home. Sweat caused her bright pink tank top stick to her body, matching sweater tied securely around her waist. When she was a block away from home her phone started to trill and she fished it from her pocket. She swiped her finger across the screen to accept the incoming video call and beamed when Stan’s face filled with rectangular screen.

“Hey, Grunkle Stan!” she greeted cheerfully.

“Hey, kiddo.” He noticed the blurs of green shrubbery in the background and asked, “Out painting the town red?”

“Nah, just taking Waddles for a walk.”

Stan shook his head in mock-disappointment. “You kids are pretty boring without the supernatural surrounding you.”

“Our secret is out,” joked Mabel. “What sorts of trouble are you causing?”

“Well, I accidentally broke a statue in an abandoned temple, and I guess it was sacred or something, for the locals freaked out. We got chased out of the village, but I managed to smuggle a rare jewel with us, which is the only reason why Ford isn’t giving me the silent treatment.”

“Wow, I was sort of joking, but I really should have known better,” said Mabel in amusement. “Can I see the jewel?”

“Sure. Gimme a sec.”

Mabel reached her front door as Stan started rummaging for the artefact. She stepped into the air-conditioned hallway and unclipped the leash, allowing Waddles to scamper off. She glanced back the screen to see a weird, spiky amber-coloured gem cradled in Stan’s hand.

“Cool!” she exclaimed. “What is it?”

“That’s what we’re trying to figure out. Where’s your brother? He’d probably get a kick out of this.”

“He’s probably in the bathroom, hold on.”

“Whoa, you can’t just burst in on him! There are some things I want to go through life not seeing.”

“No, ew, he’s been trying to get rid of a pimple,” laughed Mabel.

“Ah. The teenage years. How I hated them.”

Mabel discovered the bathroom door open but the lights were off. She turned on her heel and shuffled into the bedroom, where she found Dipper typing away at his computer. “Yo, Dipping-Dots, Grunkle Stan has something to show you!”

Dipper turned his head, eyes widening at the sight of his great-uncle on Mabel’s phone. “Wait, not when I have junk on my face!” he yelped, jumping up and accidentally tripping over the chair leg, crashing to the floor.

Mabel jogged over and peeked down at her brother, who groaned and shoved his chair to the side, the wheels making tracks in the carpet. She squinted. “Is that toothpaste?”

“Toothpaste is supposed to go in your mouth, not on your face,” quipped Stan.

Dipper flushed and stood, the bright blue glob of mint-scented toothpaste covering his pimple. “It’s a home remedy,” he defended. “The general consensus online seems to be that it works. I thought I’d give it a shot.”    

“You try popping it?”

“I am not popping this thing,” exclaimed Dipper. “That’s disgusting. Besides, I’m trying to reduce my chances of leaving a scar.”

“Too bad I’m not there. I was the ruler of popping pimples.”

Mabel pulled a face. “Super gross, yet not surprising.”

“What was it you wanted to show me?” asked Dipper.

Stan showed Dipper his discovery and the thirteen-year-old fawned over it for a moment. On Stan’s end of the video call there was the sound of footsteps falling on wood and Ford’s voice spoke, “Stanley, I’ve told you not to play with the gem. There won’t be much to study if you break it.”

“I’m showin’ it to the runts, Poindexter.”

Ford squeezed next to Stan on the screen and smiled. “Hello, kids.” His gaze landed on the patch of blue on Dipper’s face and he asked in bemusement,

“What’s on your chin, Dipper?”

“Toothpaste,” he answered, cheeks flushing slightly. “Beneath the toothpaste is a pimple that may or may not consume my face at a later date.”

“He was hoping you might have a solution for him,” said Mabel. “This was his attempt while he waited.”

“Did you contact me?” asked Ford, brow furrowing. He patted his pocket, quickly realizing that his phone was not where it usually was. “Blast. I must have forgotten it here when I went out in port. I’m sorry, my boy.”

“Hypocrite,” scoffed Stan. “You’re always on me about bringing my phone everywhere.”

“That’s because you forget yours ten times more than me,” returned Ford. Placing his attention back on Dipper, he said carefully, “I’m not sure if toothpaste is the best remedy for acne.”

Dipper groaned. “I thought it sounded really weird.”

“No, no, it’s certainly a tactic that people use,” assured Ford. “But the ingredients in toothpaste will dry out your skin, which could sometimes make it worse. In my youth I tended to use a honey and cinnamon mask. It’s not necessarily proven that it works, but I certainly saw improvements. Raw honey has more medicinal benefits than commercial honey.”

“There’s about a thousand and one health shops in California, so that shouldn’t be a problem,” said Mabel cheerfully.

“Did you ever try and experiment with acne solutions?” asked Dipper curiously.

“I did. Once.”

“Ended horribly,” said Stan with a cackle. “His entire face broke out into hives and boils. It lasted for almost two months. It was disgusting.”

Ford glared. “Though I could have cracked the perfect acne treatment skin cream, I decided that perhaps such an endeavour would be best left for professional dermatologists. There are drugstore creams and masks you can use, but it will most likely require trial and error to find one that works best for you.”

“I guess I could do that,” said Dipper, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’ll start with the honey things for now. I really want to bring this pimple down before school tomorrow.”

“Kid, you’re not the first to have a bright red spot in the center of your face,” said Stan.

Mabel threw her hands in the air. “That’s what I said!”

“I know, I know. I just…feel self-conscious, and we all know I have enough of that.”

“I’m afraid nothing of puberty is fun. It’s okay if acne makes you feel uncomfortable—it’s natural, and I guarantee majority of teens go through it every day,” reassured Ford. “But you don’t have to be ashamed of it. As cliché as it is, your appearance is only a small part of who you are—”

“—it’s what’s on the inside that’s most important,” finished Dipper with a sincere smile.

“And if anyone wants to give you crap for some dumb zit, they’re the ones with real insecurities,” added Stan. “Just deck ‘em.”

“Er…I think I’ll save that as a last resort,” said Dipper with a slight smile. “I’ll just ignore them and keep my head high.”

“Stanley, you could learn a thing or two from him,” chided Ford.

“Shut up, Poindexter.”

Dipper laughed. “I’m gonna wash this junk off of my face and find some cinnamon. Thanks.”

“Anytime my boy.”

“You’ll keep us updated on what you find with the gem?”

“Of course,” agreed Ford. “Granting that Stan doesn’t break it.”

“Keep up the attitude and I’ll do it just to spite you,” countered Stan.

They said their goodbyes and Mabel disconnected the video call. “I’ll go milk a bee for some honey.”

Dipper squinted at her. “You are joking, right?”

Mabel rolled her eyes. “Glad to know you think so highly of me.” She leaned forwards and gingerly poked the blob of toothpaste, where not a single blue chip came off. “It hardened, bro.”

“Ah, shoot!”

To: Grunkle Ford (Highsixer); Grunkle Stan (StantheMan); Dipper Pines (GhostHarasserfan)

From: Mabel Pines (ShootingStarRainbowUnicorn)

Subject: Magic of makeup

1 Attachment (Photo File)

Hey!

So the honey and cinnamon mask brought down the redness, but the pimple was still noticeable. Thankfully I’m a whiz with makeup. Should have just done this from the beginning!

Much love,

Mabel

See all messages in this thread (Expand)

Dipper Pines: Thanks for letting me know ahead of time that you were doing this…

Mabel Pines: Aw, come on, you’re not the only guy to ever wear makeup. Robbie is awesome with eyeliner.

Dipper Pines: That does not comfort me.

Grunkle Stan: Wow, can’t even see it. How much gunk did you use?

Mabel Pines: Just a few layers of foundation and concealer.

Grunkle Ford: This technique would have saved me a lot of grief with my more appalling acne episodes.

Grunkle Stan: You’re lucky to have a sister like you do, kiddo.

Dipper Pines: Yeah, definitely. But I think it’s only fair that she sends you a picture of herself.

Grunkle Ford: Why’s that?

Dipper Pines: The makeup job she performed on herself is miraculous. She woke up this morning with a huge zit in the middle of her nose. Hers is way worse than mine.

Mabel Pines: …I would say it’s unbecoming to boast, but if you ever end up getting braces I will be laughing all the way to the orthodontist.

[fangirlwithapen]

Where Dreams Turn Into Nightmares

Fandom: Gravity Falls

Chapter: 14/?

Read on AO3 ; Read on fanfiction.net

Dipper Pines is willing to do anything for his twin sister Mabel. Even if it means traveling into an alternate dimension with someone he barely trusts to get her back.

Chapter 14: Reunion

Happy (late) new year everyone! I know it's been, like, a million years since I updated last, and I'm really sorry about that! Life's been hijacking my plans a lot lately, and things have been piling up for me to do! I'm gonna try as hard as I can to update more often. Enjoy!

The first thing Dipper noticed when he came to was an intense headache. He groaned, lifting his head to his hands, and he sat up onto his elbow. He was about to scan his surroundings when he was startled by a nasally voice behind him.

"Don't worry; the headache's normal after a hypnosis trance."

Dipper spun around to face the voice, not sure if he should be ready to fight something or run for his life. Instead he saw the red circular demon who had been with Diablo- Alvin, he thought- with his back to him and a light blue flame sprouting from his hands. "What... What's going on? Where am I?" He asked the demon, not fully sure if he'd get a response. After all, this was a DEMON he was dealing with, and he wasn't sure if this was gonna end in some form of bizarre mutilation.

"Storage closet. Near the Converter. I had to knock both of you out so I could convince Diablo you had collapsed of exhaustion. That way I had an excuse to get you away from there."

"Wha-" Dipper was beyond confused. This was a demon, right? One of the monsters that had kidnapped countless children- including his own SISTER- to fuel their sick dimension? Why in God's name would a demon be trying to help him and- MABEL! Where was she? Had Alvin taken him away and left Mabel to suffer in the hands of Bill and Diablo? "Where's my sister?"

Alvin didn't answer. From what Dipper could tell, he was muttering something in a language Dipper couldn't recognize over the flames that he was creating. But why?

"Hey, you! Didn't you hear me? I'm talking to you!" Dipper shakily rose to his feet, still dizzy from the trance, and stumbled over to Alvin. "Where is- Mabel!"

There she was, encapsulated in the blue flames that Alvin was creating. She was still unconscious, and from the looks of it, she wasn't breathing much. Which was a sight that Dipper did not respond well to. "HEY! What are you doing to her? Back away!"

Alvin gave Dipper a terrifying glare, one that made Dipper squeak with fear. "I'm removing the trance that Diablo placed over your sister."

Dipper swallowed nervously. "Trance?"

"Yes. Diablo cast a fear trance over Subject 621 so she would fear all other humans and try to annihilate you on sight. It's an incredibly powerful trance, so it may take some time to undo. Now step aside."

"You have done this before, right, uh... Alvin?" Dipper raised an eyebrow skeptically at Alvin.

A sheepish look appeared on Alvin's face. "Well, not exactly... no. But I've studied trances extensively, and I've memorized how to cast and undo trances. It should be fine. Now stand aside. I have work to do."

Dipper couldn't believe his ears. He was supposed to entrust his sister's fate with a demon who had never undone a trance before? "Wait just a minute, man. You've never done this before? How do I know you won't screw it up and like, erase Mabel's mind or something?"

"Stand aside," Alvin's patient tone became increasingly irritated. "I know what I'm doing."

"Only because you read about it! This is my sister we're talking about! Why should I trust you with saving her, anyway? You've been trying to kill her for weeks!"

"I SAID STAND ASIDE!" Alvin roared, and Dipper shut up immediately. "And you don't know the half of it! If it wasn't for me, your sister would have died a long time ago, boy!"

Shock filled Dipper's entire body, and he took a step backward. "What... what did you say?" He sputtered.

"I'm sure you remember the DVD we sent you of Subject 621's dreams, yes?"

How could Dipper forget it? He had watched his sister go through torture; that DVD was probably something Dipper would never forget, no matter how hard he tried.

"Well, before we filmed the DVD, Diablo had entirely different plans for her. He originally planned to keep the dream the same, except he wanted to let your sister bleed out on camera while you and your family watched. It was me who convinced him to keep her alive, boy! I told Diablo that her dreams could give the Converter enough power to keep the Dreamscape running for decades. Luckily, he believed me, and he let me patch her up afterwards."

Dipper breathed shakily and heavily. Man, Diablo was gonna make him watch his own sister's death? He couldn't believe it. Dipper had seen a lot of messed-up crap since he'd been in the Dreamscape, but absolutely nothing in the universe would have been more painful or horrifying than that. Just the thought was like a punch to Dipper's stomach. "What- why would you want to save her?"

Alvin sighed as he continued to work. "You may not believe this, but I have a family too. And I know I would be absolutely crushed if anything happened to them. Family is... It's one of the most important things in the universe to me. I've done a lot of things that I desperately wish I could take back while I've been under Diablo's care, but I would never purposely tear apart a family. And when I saw that Diablo wasn't afraid to annihilate your twin and your family- that was the last straw for me."

"Wow." Dipper came closer to Alvin, flashing him a soft smile. "I just- I don't know how to thank you, man. Mabel's the most important person in the whole world to me and I just... I wanna thank you for giving her back to me."

Alvin looked over at the grateful twelve-year-old standing next to him. He could tell that Dipper was trying to act mature and calm-well, as calm as one can be when his sister has been abducted by an insane demon overlord- but he was failing. Alvin could easily see the fear and innocence etched all over the boy's face, and to be quite frank, it broke his heart a little. Granted, if any other demon, even, God forbid, Diablo, found out that he felt sympathy for a weak, feeble-minded 12-year-old human, he would be cast out of this dimension faster than you could say treason. But Alvin had stopped caring what the other demons and his boss thought of him a long time ago. He was done ruining lives under Diablo's watch. So done.

After a few more minutes, Alvin finished his incantation and released his fiery grip on Dipper's sister. Both the demon and the boy watched her in anticipation, praying that she would open her eyes and be back to her normal self. Well, anyway, half of that happened at first. Dipper nudged her softly and she stirred, opening her eyes slowly and groaning. Dipper smiled lightly, sighing in relief. But his smile faded when she inched away from him.

"Dipper?" Mabel squeaked, almost sounding frightened of him.

He couldn't understand why she was afraid of him. She was his twin; they'd lived together, played together, and been best friends for their entire lives! Didn't she know that he would never in a million years try to hurt her? "It's me, Mabel," he said hesitantly, "It's Dipper."

She stayed silent, but the fear still remained in her eyes as they darted to Alvin, standing next to Dipper.

"It's okay, Mabel," Dipper said soothingly. "Alvin's not gonna hurt you. He's the reason we're together again. He saved your life!"

The mask of fear still remained frozen on Mabel's face as she stared Dipper dead in the eyes. "How... How do I know that you're not like the others?"

"The others?"

"They- they always acted the same. They would pretend they cared, that they were sorry for everything that happened down there, in the basement. Then they stopped; they took it all back and- they hurt me. Badly." She sucked in a breath, trying to contain her composure. "How do I know you're not gonna do the same thing?"

Dipper swallowed thickly. He couldn't really describe what he was feeling; it was somewhere between rage and melancholy. He felt an intense, burning rage at Diablo for making his sister go through all that crap, and at the same time he felt a deep sadness with her, with everything she had experienced in her time here. He knelt down so he could face Mabel, looking her straight in the eyes.

"Listen to me, Mabel." He lifted her head with his hand. "I can't begin to know what's happened to you here. I've only heard bits and pieces, and what I've heard is messed up, sis. I'm so sorry that I wasn't there to protect you from it. And I can't promise you that I'll protect you from everything from here on in, because I'm not perfect, and you know that. But I swear, I'm gonna try my hardest to. I'm gonna protect you from as much as I can, just like you protect me from bullies at school and the weird things in Gravity Falls. Because you're my sister, and my twin, and my best friend, and- as much as I hate to say it- you're the Alpha Twin. But you've gotta trust me if we wanna get out of here. Grunkle Stan is waiting for us somewhere, and you need to trust that we will keep you safe from now on, okay? Will you rejoin the Mystery Twins?"

Mabel stayed silent for a minute, scanning Dipper's face for any dishonesty or any sign that this was like her dreams. Meanwhile Dipper held his breath in anticipation, hoping with all his might that she believed him. After what seemed like an eternity to Dipper, Mabel smiled tearily and replied, "You know it, Bro-Bro."

Dipper couldn't help but laugh in joy as he grinned and pulled his twin in for a long awaited hug. For a moment, it didn't even register in Dipper's mind that they were in the basement of a genocidal dream factory and they were probably being hunted by a demon who wouldn't hesitate to blast them off the face of the earth if he found them. For that small moment, it was just him and Mabel in a little time-defiant bubble. Dipper knew that soon they would have to get moving again, but for right now he really didn't care. They Mystery Twins were finally back in action, and for that one infinitesimal moment, that was all that mattered.

[somedumbcomic-blog]

Morty(RM):

He has a crush on Jessica and maybe even dated her before this.

Rick cares for him and is very critical of whoever he (Morty) expresses feelings for.

Mabel is playful and flirty with him which makes Morty feel good and laugh, they would have fun together. They probably won’t wind up dating in the end.

Dipper is very critical of him (Morty), he (Morty) tries to act like Rick in front of Dipper in defense of these criticism.

Steven is very hyper and sweet, he’s seen some dark shit and has worked through it unlike Morty. Steven helps him (Morty) come to terms with what he’s seen and done and makes him a more positive person.

He (Morty) never met any smart girls before (for some reason he’s been surrounded by idiots his whole life, well other than his Grandpa Rick) He thinks it’s nice to get to know a pretty and smart girl like Connie. He doesn’t care if they like each other in a romantic way or not, he could live with either way.

Morty can’t really talk to Wirt even though they should be able to get along just fine he’s just too awkward around Wirt. He ends up just getting Wirt to buy him alcohol and shit.

Morty is shocked by how active Gregory is. He tries to brush it off and treats Gregory as a child. Gregory doesn’t really care but Morty feels like he’s somehow lying to himself as he tries to act as a mature role model.

Morty does not know how to approach Frisk, they have a sort of silent bond however bonding secretly other cute things (like unicorns and music)

He is inspired by Dib’s knowledge on aliens and such and shows him some other worlds so they can bond. That sadly is all they have, they can’t really bring themselves to talk about anything else.

Finn and Morty don’t really talk, they kind just awkwardly smile at each other and stay quiet when they have to walk together or something.

Marco has nothing that brings Morty attention to him. Morty doesn’t care to waste his time on Marco.

Star reminds Motry oddly of Rick. He kind of follows her quietly because of it.

Marco(SvFoE):

He was dating Jackie but they stopped seeing each other. They’re cool about it and are still friends but they have grown apart and don’t talk that much anymore.

He and Heckapoo are casually dating. It’s really chill and they are really playful with one another. When he brings her up he doesn’t seem too invested in the relationship.

Marco and Tom have such a love hate relationship.

Janna still treats Marco like a punching bag with her jokes. She likes him not that he cares, he doesn’t really see it.

Star is still his best friend, she is more honest with herself now and let him know how she feels. They aren’t as close because she’s very busy as a Princess but they are reconnecting now. He still thinks Star is the coolest girl he knows.

Mabel is very forward with flirting with him. He doesn’t mind and will even humor her with almost flirty replies.

Dipper and Marco nerd out together, girly boy bands, nerdy movies like star wars, and other crap they share a love for.

Steven is a little too goofy for Marco’s taste. He thinks that Steven is like the worse parts of Star.

Connie is cool. He doesn’t have any real feelings for her but he thinks she’s a cool person to talk to.

He listens to Dib rants and thinks Dib is smart.

Finn and him practice sword fighting and talk about past relationships and such.

Frisk weirds him out at first, he kinda gets into Frisk after awhile though.

He doesn’t really care for Morty. It’s nothing personal just doesn’t really Morty. He also thinks Morty is kind of a creep.

Wirt and him talk sometimes, both being actually matured unlike everyone else.

Greg is just a normal dude to him. He doesn’t really think of Greg as a child.

Star(SvFoE):

Tom and her use to date.

Janna and her have some weird sort of feelings that they have played with a little bit before.

Marco is probably the love of her life, but she’ll be fine with just being Marco’s best friend.

Mabel is sort of a mirror of herself so they get along pretty well doing some crazy shit together.

Dipper acts sweet to her but she doesn’t think much of it.

Steven and her just will sing and dance together, having personal parties and fun conversations.

Connie doesn’t really talk to her, must Star can get out of Connie is an “okay” here and there.

Wirt has the ID that provides her with her crazy desires.

Greg A fun kid in her mind.

Finn is a blonde adventurer who dates princesses, she’s kinda wondering what it’s like to date someone like that.

Frisk and her have silent nod conversations that are very deep and helpful.

Morty is cute and shy, nothing like other people she’s been around. They bond over cute shit and maybe share a kiss or som’thin’.

Dib is funny to her. She does like hearing about his love life though, but she likes hearing about everyone's love life.

Mabel(GF):

She became like besties with Pacifica, but then kissed Pacifica during a sleepover and everything became awkward. She claims she just kisses all her friends and kissed Dipper because he’s “her besties besties friend”

Bill after being rejected by the Pines boys makes a move on Mabel, who’s all like “fuck no”

She and Dipper do this fake flirting because they think it’s funny.

Morty is really cute, she kinda likes him. She’s open though.

Marco is super hawt, she flirts with him like crazy.

Star is super cool and she likes acting dumb with her.

Steven is super sweet and cool and she likes crafting with him.

She calls Connie Candy’s and Dipper’s child because she thinks that’s what a mix between the two would be like.

She ships Wirt and her brother.

Greg is sweet fun and cute, she let’s him have a crush on her.

Finn has long lovely hair that she likes to play with. He’s a doll.

Dib is nerdy and doesn’t get how to be social and she thinks that’s really cute (because it’s different from the awkwardness of the other nerd boys here) she likes to poke him.

Frisk is her sweater buddie.

Dipper(GF):

Wendy was his crush over the first summer.

Pacifica had a total crush on him. He kinda was cool with that, but back off when he saw Mabel liked her.

Candy and him would just be such a cute couple, but I probably won’t do anything with it.

Bill is a lusty jerk face demon. Dipper was going to fall for him till Bill’s proposition for a three way of him(Bill), Dipper, and Stanford.

Mabel is his beloved sister, he’ll put her above all else, especially after all his fuck ups in the past. He trust no one around his sister and her heart.

He thinks Morty is faking his nervousness so he can hook up with girls like Mabel. Dipper doesn’t like him at all. (He’s just protective and jelly~)

He looks up to Marco, like how he looked up to Stanford, because Marco is so cool.

Star reminds him too much of Mabel for him to bring himself to really like her or want to get to know her. But he also wants to write about her and her people in a journal because magic mystery stuff.

Steven is  a little too friendly for him. However they can relate with having trouble trusting people.

He can talk to Connie for hours and not feel weird about it.

Wirt is a sexy mature dude, Dipper likes those older tall people out of his league, what can I even say more about that?

Greg seems to not like him(Dipper) drooling over his(Greg) older brother.

Dib and him mix what they know, sharing notes.

Finn has cool stories that Dipper records happily.

Frisk is a cool kind in his eyes.

Steven(SU):

Peridot and him had a short thing.

Connie and him are just friends, no longer having romantic feelings for one another. Or maybe they still have romantic feelings, who knows. (reference/show off fusion)

Louise gets a crush on Steven and wants to slap his face.

Morty and him play video games together and enjoy the simpler things. (possible fusion)

Marco seems like a player to Steven but he likes everyone, he just feels a little awkward about Marco hanging around Connie.

Star is like a reversed him in ways, which is obviously a good thing relation wise. (possible fusion)

Mabel teaches him things like how to make sweaters and such. (possible fusion)

Dipper is a bit of a downer. They seem to only be able to talk about said things.

Finn senpai.

Frisk is cool, they show each other some pictures and talk a lot. Well maybe not really talk but you get it.

Low key crushing on Wirt.

Thinks it’s funny that Greg shares a name with his Father. Also rocks. (possible fusion)

Dib reminds him a little of Ronaldo.

Connie(SU):

Peedee and her had a small thing.

Steven and her are just friends, no longer having romantic feelings for one another. Or maybe they still have romantic feelings, who knows.

Morty kind of is the first to make her realize that she can have more friends and be more herself, seeing as Steven had been her first and only friend she never had a chance to think of branching out before.

Marco and her get almost a brother sister type bond.

Star is cool, she guesses.

Dipper has some nice books.

She kinda wishes Mabel wouldn’t hang around Steven so much, but says nothing about it.

Wirt is really chill and it’s easy for her to talk to him.

Greg is like a little Steven in her mind.

Frisk is sweet but weird.

Finn helps her with her sword fighting.

Dib kind of freaks her out but they’re cool.

Wirt(OtG):

Beatrice and him got into a little thing after meeting again.

Sara and him were dating.

Greg is his little brother, he cares for him very much even if they’re only half brothers.

Morty is a cute kid.

Star is a little freaky.

Marco is a little intense.

Mabel’s cute but uncomfortable to be around.

Dipper is just some nerd. Wirt worries about Dipper literally drooling on him at times.

Connie is cool, someone he could get along with.

Steven weirds him out a bit.

Finn is his tall buddy.

Dib has a big head, good arm rest, not that he ever actually means to use Dib’s head for that.

Frisk weirds him out a bit.

Gregory(OtG):

Louise and him may start dating after her crush on Steven dies down.

Wirt is his awesome older brother.

He has a crush on Mabel and her awesomeness.

Dipper is funny to him, low key ships him(Dipper) and his (Greg) older brother, Wirt.

Star is cool, he wants to play with her magic wand.

Marco also funny.

Morty hilarious and fun to tease.

Frisk is kinda cute.

Dib is weird.

Steven is like a cool role model.

He wants a Connie of his own.

Finn takes him to do dangerous shit.

Finn(AT):

Flame Princess was his GF, till they fell through. It still hurts.

Princess Bubblegum was his long time crush. He still keeps her hair like a creep.

He has faint memories of being married to Roselien (pillow) and having kids and all of that. He misses that life.

Huntress Wizard and Finn had that moment, remember, from that one episode?

Star is a cool princess, what more is there to say?

Marco and him swap knowledge.

Mabel is like a cute kid in his eyes.

Dipper is the same as Mabel to him.

Steven has a cool magical shield, Finn wants to figure out how to get that kind of power.

Connie is a cool lady who sword fights, clearly he wants to be friends with her.

Wirt tall buddy.

Greg low key reminds him of Jake.

Frisk and him will adventure silently sometimes.

Dip is funny.

He thought Morty was a girl for awhile.

Dib(IZ)

Tak is his alien girlfriend.

Mabel actually listens to him, he really enjoys that.

Dipper is really cool, he also listens and will share notes and ideas.

Morty tells him about aliens and stuff Rick has made.

Finn doesn’t really talk to him.

Frisk is used as a test subject sometimes.

Marco hears out his rants.

Star is a little on the crazy side in his mind.

He bugs Steven the way Ronaldo does.

Connie is whatever to him.

Wirt pisses him off most of the time.

Greg frustrates him.

Frisk(UT):

Sans is a bae.

Flowey is forgiven.

Chara some ghost kid who follows them around.

Monster kid a close friend they fan out with.

Morty is kinda cute.

Mabel is sweet, sweater buddy.

Dipper is curious.

Steven is sweet.

Connie nice to be around.

Finn and them have cool adventures.

Marco is a little awkward.

Star is super cool.

Wirt is interesting.

Greg is cute.

Dib is weird.

Extras:

Gideon (GF)

Will show up for Mabel to have a time where she shows a different side then her cheerful self.

Summer (RM)

Morty brings her up and shows everyone a picture on his phone of her. Her redheadness is very much appreciated.

Jake (AT)

Finn refers to him as his best friend and is show as busy with his family in the beginning.

Zim (IZ)

Dib gripes about him alot.

Lousie (BB)

Is a bonus character I added last minute she just happens to be there. She doesn’t interact with the others as much. Her brother and sister are also there.

The Gems (SU)

Steven talks about them a lot.

Steven’s Dad (SU)

Steven will talk about him every now and then. Also referenced in relation to Gregory’s name.

Stanley and Stanford (GF)

Dipper and Mabel talk about them a lot. Morty expresses hearing names like that before from his Grandpa Rick.

Notes/Other references:

Adventures moments.

Finn, Connie, and Marco sword fighting buddies.

Something about fusion: Steven and Connie show off their fusion to everyone. Steven then starts fusing with other people. This will show more fusions than the listed possibilities. Possibilities means they show up on their own.

Wirt is the tallest, the second tallest is Finn.

Bill will take over Dib’s body at some point.

Some crappy FNAF reference.

Shows Chara being an annoying ghost now and then.

Pokemon refrence which leads to Pocket Mortys being referenced.

Legend of Zelda references.

Songs to make things more fun.

Sleepover party moments.

Dance party moments.