#but this fandom has shown that blocking guarantees peace

[disdaidal]

I'm tired of antis! This one must be themost idiotic one yet https://ibb.co/yhntNqj now we hating on Dacre or even blaming him? Yeah no this is enough. I'm blocking antis from today onwards. I always try to avoid that button because I support freedom of speech and whatnot but this is straight up stupid.

'not really i just want likes' That tells enough. Just block them.

[thegreatmercutio]

Making friends...in a Shadowhunters and Malec Fandom. It's a long read...addressing the negativity and the ship wars.

Growing up I learned a valuable lesson. “If you want to make friends, never talk about religion and politics.” You just can’t make friends that way. Lesson learned. Ha!

Look, I was cruising through the Malec fandom. Throwing some “likes” and comments to some post. And once in while under a mystical full moon…I stumble upon some hate. That’s expected. It’s a massive growing fandom…so opinionated minds are expected. There’s not a fandom out there without its own brand of drama. Drama is guaranteed in all fandoms. We’re always at each other neck, one way or another.

One of the biggest thing about the Shadowhunters fandom is shipping. I have never been so overwhelmed by the “shipping” in this fandom. I ship too. But I am not big on it. I really I am not. I got few favorites and a few one hit wonders in my lifetime, but I have always like to stay away from shipping. Ship wars is very obnoxious…but strangely interesting…if you interested in how human act and think when it’s other people’s relationships and not theirs.

Malec is actually my first big ship that I actually actively supporting. I’ll have been a Supernatural fan since season 1…ironically it was a clown episode, and I hate clowns. However, I loved the two brothers, the storyline, the acting, the cases, and the supernatural elements…all of them was all in the “good” categories for me. But I choose to stay away from the fandom. Not because there isn’t good people within the fandom, it’s just too much drama…too much shipping that it was beginning to look like a high school level debate team…when you realize that the frontal lobe hasn’t been fully developed yet…so maturity is too much to ask for. So, I stayed away. Enjoyed the Supernatural fandom on my own terms…and as much as I enjoyed the bromances of Supernatural. I actually have no real ships within that fandom. I just watch the show, for the show. For real. Really.

When I heard that The Mortal Instruments was becoming a television series and that Malec is an aim for development. And Magnus is being played Harry Shum Jr…no Whitewash Magnus Bane! Yes! I was so happy, but I was unsure if I wanted to actively support them in the magical world of social medias. Because it wasn’t because they didn’t deserve the love and the support, but because of the drama that was coming when an interracial relationship was going to be put in front of a massive collection of opinionated minds. And sadly with honesty…I knew Magnus and Harry was going to get most of the heat. It was my nature to think that way. Is it justified? Like most human, I based my worries from years of witnessed discrimination and hatred. And I have seen it within the Shadowhunters fandom.

It’s not a perfect world, it’s learning, it’s better than it was…but a person of color and a person of a different sexual orientation that isn’t straight and white is going to have to work harder…just to be accepted. Mostly when they going to be judge by very impressionable minds that grew up with a set of conditioning. It’s a shameful social rule that we don’t want to admit to it, but it’s ignorance to believe it doesn’t exist.

I remember talking to my best friend, who was surprised that I was actually taking a step in the dark side of shipping. But Malec matter to me. I know that in books, there are problems…but it’s the author’s books, it was her choice and her directions. You can only say so much. What I love about is that potential of them. The simple beauty of two guys, from two walks of life, coming together…learning from each other…and loving each other is very heart warming and it made me very happy that for first time in my lifetime that this interracial couple between a White Gay man and a Asian Bisexual man are canon and they actually have a fan base. A strong one too. I am very proud of the Malec fandom. There’s a lot of very amazing individuals…that’s are so talented and so creative. Really amazing individuals in this fandom, that deserves a lot of love and support.

So I stayed. And I know about the drama. Hell, I am no Saint. I am sure I offended somebody at some point and the future doesn’t guarantee that I won’t offend someone again and again. I am not them and they are not me. We’re not expected to share same the principles and feelings. I have very strong stands with Malec. I only ship Magnus with Alec and Alec with Magnus…no “ifs” or “buts” with me with them. I don’t need to understand or justify other ships. I don’t going looking for them. Doesn’t mean I don’t respect other people opinions and feelings. But I don’t go dwelling on them either.

It’s true, Malec are not real…fictional and made for the purpose of entertainment. But it’s the idea behind them. That idea is real. That’s the most important element to me. There has been many interracial relationships in the past, shown through many massive media outlets…but they are not treated like Malec. There a sense of thought and protectiveness within this Malec fandom. And they can get very passionate about it.

They surpassed in popularity against the “main” couple of the show and they can compete with likes of large “ship” fandoms like Olicity and Clexa. I was at awe and was very proud of the support. (I hope I am getting a message through here). But there has always been this feeling. It’s kinda of like a “it’s too good to be true” feeling…like it’s a dream and you going to wake up and realize they just another token to the same old song. Some of the choices done within the show isn’t without questionable concerns. But my focus here is “the idea” behind Malec.

That it’s okay, that you’re a gay conservative White guy falling in love with a flamboyant make up wearing bisexual Asian man. That you both come with baggages of years of discrimination and shaken self esteem…but yet willing to fight pass it and see each other…and be there for each other through the adversity and the pain…I actually do believe these two will fight to stay together (in the books and in the show)…that even if they don’t agree with each other all the time…it doesn’t break that love between them…that’s a big deal…to the likes of me.

I need people to know that this kind of love is out there and look at the SUPPORT this kind of love is getting…that through this use of medium (this art form of storytelling)…that’s it’s okay my friend that you in love with someone who isn’t in your “enforced” circle of life. That’s because you come from different culture, ethnicity,…skin tones…doesn’t make your love for each other any less important. That it’s okay to follow your heart. That when your world tells you that it’s wrong to love that person…because the way they look, because of their sexual orientations, their religion…their gender…or because they’re a boy who has more make up than your own mother…that it’s okay. That somewhere out there there are people like you, will accept you, support you, and love you. That’s why Malec matters to me. That’s why they need to exist.

It’s doesn’t matter how much you think people are made to be strong, or encouraged to be strong…people still need to be reminded that’s it’s going to be okay. I will be one of those people. That’s you’re going to be okay. You’re not alone and there will always be people that’s on your side.

Here is a little nod to the negativity. I don’t want people to think that Malec are the villains of the Shadowhunters fandom. There are individuals who choose to spread hate and negativity…and that comes from every corner of this shipping fandom. Do not think that your fandom doesn’t come with hate. I expect it from all the corners. It’s sad. It’s not right, but it’s ignorant to think it doesn’t exist and just because you don’t see it…doesn’t mean it’s not there.

People are not expected to share your opinions and your principles. I am speaking to all of you. If you looking for fight, you will get one. Fighting words are fighting words. You can ask for peace, for respect, for equality…but you can’t sit there and think it’s going to be fix overnight…and that once in the full moon that there isn’t someone out there that isn’t going to offend you.

I apologize for the behalf of this fandom due the negativity among shippers. No one should be bullied and threatened. No one. Some lines should never be crossed especially when it’s for fictional shipping. Bullying is terrible. Never a justified action. That’s not what Malec is…for me. I am very sorry. I do honestly hope people can play nice and at least stay in their tags, but I can’t promise you that. I know I will face another wind of negativity soon…the show is coming back. So I hope you are mentally preparing yourself if you planning to stay within this fandom. Drama is definitely promised.

What I can advise. Is the only control is your own actions. If you’re going to be opinionated, you’re going to be opinionated…no one should ever take your right to speak your beautiful mind. I ask as politely as I can…do it respectfully and civil as it can be. But if it isn’t…it’s isn’t. Retaliation is going to happen, either ways. I am sorry. That’s just how the world works. To protect the freedom of speech is to accept the good and the bad. But you do have the power and the ability to avoid…to walk away, to block, log off…take a deep breath…call someone you love…have a good rant and drink some tea and have a cookie…or a brownie. Watch something else, maybe a comedy?

Keep your sanity. And take care of yourself.