#but. thats all i can think of atm that i feel would improve the zombies side of the mode.

[skeletalheartattack]

Thoughts on the new tf2 maps?

well, i can't give my thoughts on all 12 maps that were added, as my experience with them has been queuing through casual, and bots are absolutely ruining the fun of trying to play these maps, so i'll try and provide my thoughts with just the ones i've done.

Spineyard: i think ive only played a few rounds of it, but i like the maps looks and layout. the mafia skeletons are neat, although i couldn't figure out what the piles of money they dropped did. overall, pretty good payload map.

Lava Pit: it's gravel pit with a lot of lava pits, it's alright, i don't have much to say about it.

Mannsylvania: so, player destruction and king of the hill maps are kinda my least favourite gamemodes, but from what i played of the map. it's neat, i like how the map looks.

Slime: only actually got to play this map for one match with 5 players on both teams, since every other time was just flooded with bots. i like it, despite my disliking of king of the hill. the salmenn are fun skeleton replacements, i think i like them better than the other skeleton reskins. they've got fun designs too.

Perks: really liked the map, though i always do kinda wish valve would add more modular support for arena mode, so map makers don't have to resort to using other gamemodes like koth and player destruction just to simulate arena. i only played like three whole matches, with like 4 players on each team. wish i had played with more cause i did really like the concept.

Murky: im conflicted with the idea of a zombies mode in TF2, mostly just from a design standpoint. each class has their own zombie perks, some work fine, others feel lacking. with 9 classes, i think you eventually spread yourself thin with trying to come up with unique abilities that are useful for taking out the survivors. the map itself is fine. mostly had to deal with a lot of bot rounds before i could enjoy the map.

Atoll: the visual design of the map is really nice, though with how open the map is, it's tough to play as zombies, as humans have the high ground. playing as a sniper zombie, who can shoot acid, sucks a lot since you can't really get a read on how far your projectiles drop. engineer zombies have a similar problem, though with them, it's nearly impossible to see the travel arc of your pipebombs.

every other map, i've just not had enough time playing them. both due to bots and also because im doing my halloween contracts in the order it gives me.

[suspiciouslandlady]

OTP Game

Pick your top 10 OTPs without reading the questions

1. Kirishima Eijirou x Katsuki Bakugou

2. Sasori x Deidara

3. Erwin Smith x Levi

4. Jean Kirschtein x Marco Bodt

5. Nagisa Kaworu x Shinji Ikari

6. Cloud Strife x Sephiroth

7. Steve Rogers x Tony Stark

8. Peter Parker x Wade Wilson

9. Kaminari Denki x Sero Hanta

10. Emperor Mateus x Kuja (lmao I had to add this crackship, I’ve started to like it so much ahaha)

1. Do you remember the episode/scene/chapter that you first started shipping 6?  - Honestly I can’t remember when I started to ship Sefikura because the first time I saw them was in Advent Children movie, followed by Kingdom Hearts until I finally started to be interested in Final Fantasy. Somewhere between their eternal fighting haha.

2. Have you ever read a fanfic about 2? - I’m reading one atm hahaa!! But yeah, Sasodei was my 1st ship ever and I did read some fics about them back in 2008-2009. 

3. Has a picture of 4 ever been your screen saver/profile picture/tumblr screen saver? - Oh yeah they definitely have. 

4. If 7 were to suddenly break up today, what would your reaction be? - Wasn’t that the plot of Captain America: Civil War? No? Pfffft!! But honestly watching CA: Civil War was pain since I don’t want to take neither of their sides or see them fighting against each other but ugh. 

5. Why is 1 so important? - I love everything about their relationship. They complete each other and it’s just so amazing that Kirishima is Bakugou’s first true friend. A person he really acknowledges as his friend and trusts him. And I don’t even need to talk about that one moment we all know... *cough* take my hand *cough* 

But also!! Kirishima is able to grow as a person with Bakugou’s help too. It’s not one-sided with only Bakugou improving his character. They both are good influence to each other.

6. Is 9 a funny ship or a serious ship? - I think to me, they’re more of a funny ship because the memes and shit, two damn goofballs at your service. But there’s a hint of seriousness and I really like to read serious Kamisero fics as well. Though sometimes it feels like they’re more harder to find :/

7. Out of all the ships listed, which ship has the most chemistry? - Ugh I think there’s at least couple ships that have so much chemistry but I gotta say Eruri. I mean, Isayama did hint stuff about Erwin and Levi having deeper relationship than just friends but beside that, their chemistry is so fucking great. I guess it has something do with Levi’s Ackerbond to Erwin as well, Levi has dedicated his entire life to help Erwin reach his goals. And Erwin respects him, I feel like at the beginning he was the only one who held some kind of respect toward him and saw all the potential in Levi, even when he was just a thug in underground city.

8. Out of all your ships listed, which ship has the strongest bond? - Eruri again. And again, one of the reasons is probably Ackerbond. But their bond is so damn strong and Levi trusts Erwin with his whole life. And we all know how selective Levi can be with people.

9. How many times have your read/watched 10’s fandom? - Well it’s a crack ship so I guess I have to break it down into three different fandoms. FFII where Emperor is from, not that much. I’ve played the remastered version of it with my PSP but never finished it. I should play it some day. 

FFIX where Kuja is from, I finished the game last month and loved it. It made me love and understand Kuja’s character a lot more and he’s now my top 1 favorite Final Fantasy Villain.

Dissidia Final Fantasy is probably ‘the fandom’ where I ship this, as it’s an actual game where they both are. I used to play Dissidia back in middle school so much, like my first Dissidia 012 saving on my PSP is from 2011... And I recently played it again and finished the story mode. Still the best 1vs1 game ever, and I’m not even fan of those types of games.

10. Which ship has lasted the longest? - Sasodei probably. I started shipping them when I was 12 and even when I fell out of Naruto and stuff, they’ve always hold a special place in my heart. Even now as I’m getting back to the old fandom, reading and seeing pics of them gives me that same sweet feeling I felt toward this ship decade ago. I don’t even care what people say about them (I’ve heard some peepz call it abusive??? I kinda see what they’re trying to imply but then again wtf people???) because honestly, idgaf. It’s a ship that is precious to me from my past, it’s the roots of my weeb and shipping life.

Another long ship is both Eruri and Jeanmarco, I started shipping them back in 2014 and still ship them! 

11. How many times, if ever, has 6 broken up? - They never were together in the beginning since Sephiroth is Cloud’s arch-nemesis 😂 It’s hard to even describe their relationship because there’s nothing sane in it. That’s why I also ship Zack x Cloud, it makes sense and balances the hate stuff what is happening in Sefikura pfft.

12. If the world was suddenly thrust into a zombie apocalypse, which ship would make it out alive, 2 or 8? - LMAO I love how both of these ships have one who is immortal. Or ‘’immortal’’. Wade would have no problem with the virus since his healing factor is good and I bet zombies wouldn’t even care about Sasori since he’s a puppet. 

But I think they both would actually make it out alive. Peter is freaking Spiderman, he has everything what will help him survive (his spidey sense, being able to crawl on the walls/ceiling etc). Deidara would just explode everything into pieces. 

13. Did 7 ever have to hide their relationship for any reason? - I don’t think they’d have a reason to hide it, but also I feel like they’d prefer to keep it behind the walls of their home. 

14. Is 4 still together? - 😔 Marco has been dead like forever. I’m still salty about his death after all these long years.

15. Is 10 canon? - Definitely not since they’re from different games pffft! Oh the joy of crack ship. But you know, in original Dissidia Kuja’s encounter intro for Mateus is “You think you can dominate me?” 😂 and honestly Kuja, that’s not something you should say to Palamecia

16. If all 10 ships were put into a couple’s Hunger Games, which couple would win? - I honestly feel like Cloud and Sephiroth would win it. Sephiroth alone is a fella you don’t want to fight against because he WILL kill you without a hesitation. And since Cloud has Jenova cells in him as well, he’s not just an ordinary guy with a sword. If he can keep up with Sephiroth’s shit, being literally stabbed like a kebab in AC, I’m sure he can keep up with others as well.

17. Has anybody ever tried to sabotage 5’s ship? - Well Kaworu is literally one of the enemy in the series but he abandoned his mission and let Shinji kill him. He also truly loved Shinji, that’s what I like to think. He didn’t just play with his feelings.

18. Which ship would you defend to the death and beyond? - Probably the top 5 since they’re mostly my serious-serious ships. The rest 6-10 are one way or another either for fun or something else. Sefikura is good source for arch-nemesis stuff and hate-sex etc (tho I’ve read sweet and great fluff about them too), Stony is just there with superfamily au, Spideypool is great and they’re both goofballs, Kamisero is more fun than serious stuff and Emperor/Kuja is just a random crack ship I happened to stumble upon suddenly out of nowhere. 

19. Do you spend hours a day going through 3’s tumblr page? - I used to but since I haven’t been active in snk fandom in a year, I’ve been digging other ships from Tumblr instead. I guess one of the reasons is that Eruri fandom kinda just... idk never felt so welcoming as some other fandoms? AoT fandom in general has been so fucking toxic through the years. 

20. If an evil witch descended from the sky and told you that you had to pick one of the ten ships to break up forever or else she’d break them all forever, which ship would you sink? - Probably Emperor/Kuja because they’re just a crack ship and don’t even have a lot of content... even tho there’s this one fic what I absolutely love about them aaaaa. But yeah probably that or Cloud/Sephiroth because I can always ship Cloud with Zack ;D

My tags @repesso @thats-so-hambone @cybergutzz

[cryinghole-blog]

Xav: I'll talk to you on Steam but won't join tipchat again

Chinye: whats wrong

Xav: I dunno

Xav: I'm yelling a lot

Xav: Keep on changing what I want to do

Xav: Keep on fidgeting

Xav: So I'll talk after this shower

Chinye: ok

Chinye: i hope u feel better

Chinye: is something about tipchat bothering u?

Chinye: something i said?

Xav: No, it's me

Xav: I got upset in the shower. When I'm calmed down I'll tell you

Chinye: can i help?

Xav: I just need to unload on you

Xav: Sorry in advanced

Chinye: ok

Xav: Just here's the jist

Xav: I'm lazy

Chinye: lazy?

Chinye: i dont really get that impression with you

Chinye: did you forget to do something?

Xav: okay im back on

Xav: this might take a while

Xav: because i just have a horrible feeling in my gut

Xav: but the main reason why i am in my current life circumstance is that I'm lazy

Xav: 2010, first year of high school

Xav: everything was okay besides friend

Xav: 2011

Xav: i couldn't develop a study strategy

Xav: because I didn't feel like it

Xav: and pushed away the worries by either talking to people, playing games, watching things, etc.

Xav: this manifested

Xav: i started to not ask for help

Xav: because I didn't want to

Xav: and it was so much effort

Xav: this started spilling into everything

Xav: in life

Xav: today

Xav: i didn't eat breakfast

Xav: because i didn't want to

Xav: i didn't walk peggy

Xav: because i didn't want to

Xav: didn't do washing, the dishes, clean up

Xav: didn't go outside

Xav: it goes into video games

Xav: i can have more fun in Granblue if I looked up what I should do next and grind

Xav: but I'm lazy

Xav: and don't want to put in effort

Xav: so I just whine about my current situation

Xav: i would put more effort into trying to rebuild friendships

Xav: but I'm lazy

Xav: t would require too much effort

Xav: and make me anxious

Xav: and runin mty day

Xav: so I resort to staying inside

Xav: I was in the shwower

Xav: I was too lazy to get out

Xav: i just let the water envelop me

Xav: Like a wet and slippery cocoon

Xav: I don't try to develop new hobbies

Xav: Because that requires me to fail first to improve

Chinye: you sound like me

Xav: and I don't want to do that

Xav: I am too lazy to get up

Chinye: thats exactly how i am

Xav: too lazy to get dressed

Xav: too lazy to look for a job

Xav: too lazy to seek help from free government services

Xav: too lazy to tell mum and dad my real inner problems

Xav: too lazy to even start a conversation with my surviving friends

Xav: too lazy to become alive

Xav: too lazy to defend myself

Xav: i just take each blow

Xav: too lazy to do these stretches which will stop me feeling pain

Xav: too lazy to stop any of this happening

Xav: too lazy to believe in myself

Chinye: do you have anything that motivates you

Xav: i dunno

Xav: i just wanna go to sleep

Xav: because im too lazy to figure out what to do for the rest of the day

Xav: Too lazy to even try to find someone to fuck the pain away

Xav: I'm too lazy to find out if I even like dick

Xav: I've just masturbated to some dumb doujins online

Xav: had one boyfriend

Xav: who hadn't even transitioned yt

Xav: and i label myself as bi/pan

Xav: too lazy to get to the root of the problem

Xav: too lazy to get better at video games

Xav: doesn't that just make your skin crawl?

Xav: i want to do all these things

Xav: but this little thing in my head just makes me this walking zombie

Chinye: it doesnt really make it crawl but it makes me lock up a bit

Chinye: because i have exactly the same problem

Chinye: no motivation to do anything

Chinye: too lazy to fix my problems

Xav: i can feel my energy leak out

Chinye: I dont know what to say about it

Xav: all the positivity

Chinye: cause like im exactly the same

Xav: i want to cut off my limbs

Chinye: I wish there was a magic fix

Chinye: :(

Xav: and im too lazy to stop talking and think about your feelings

Chinye: you dont need to stop

Xav: i just keep on going

Xav: and impede negativity onto you

Chinye: negativity doesn't bother me

Chinye: I can handle it

Xav: even though i know how you feel because i've been in your spot so many times

Chinye: I just am thinking about it

Chinye: I dont know how to solve problems i have myself

Chinye: its good to know im not alone though

Xav: i'm too lazy to tell people what they say makes me feel horrible but i bottle it up and struggle to help them but all i can do is hit these plastic objects

Chinye: I thought other people just had motivation to do things

Chinye: and that things were just harder for me

Xav: which then sends an impulse to wiring then goes through all of these devices

Xav: to someone else

Chinye: Do i make you feel bad?

Chinye: with anything i say?

Chinye: I can stop dumping emotional stuff on you

Xav: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mWotngJBcc

Xav: i can't stop talking to you though

Xav: because then you will have to talk to someone else

Xav: and gothrough the same process

Chinye: I can keep it in

Chinye: and deal with it myself

Chinye: like should've done in the first place

Xav: you;'ll hurt yourself in the

Xav: process

Chinye: i'm sorry i've been dumping stuff on you

Chinye: I wont anymore

Xav: no

Chinye: thanks for all the help so far though

Xav: i want to be strong

Xav: i want to be strong for you

Xav: but i'm just so squishy

Xav: and take everything to heart

Chinye: i told you before

Chinye: i can handle it myself

Xav: i dont want you to be in pain

Chinye: i just got weak

Chinye: and let it fall on someone else

Chinye: dont worry about it anymore

Xav: i failed

Chinye: how?

Chinye: we're still gonna hang out

Chinye: and talk

Chinye: just not about sad stuff

Chinye: unless you need help

Chinye: maybe it'd be good to get some sleep though

Chinye: you said you were tired

Chinye: and i dont want you ot be upset

Xav: i donm't know

Xav: do we even have anything else to talk about?

Chinye: ofc we do

Chinye: are u joking

Chinye: i think were really good friend

Chinye: s

Chinye: we can talk about games

Chinye: and shows

Chinye: and things going on in discord

Xav: every day i just feel weaker and weaker

Xav: yesterday was fine

Xav: i don';t know why

Xav: everything felt different

Xav: but just

Xav: thinking of anything

Chinye: its my fault

Xav: makes me collapse

Chinye: you have been dealing with other peoples problems

Xav: no

Chinye: in addition to your own

Chinye: ofc its gonna be hard

Xav: please no

Chinye: ???

Xav: i don't wnat it ot be like this

Chinye: what to be like what

Chinye: im confused sorry

Xav: i dunno

Chinye: oh ok well

Chinye: if you wanna play games

Chinye: or anything

Chinye: let me know

Chinye: get some rest tho

Chinye: noob

Xav: i want to be stronger for you

Xav: for everyone

Chinye: then get there

Chinye: prepare yourself

Chinye: but that doesnt mean you gotta deal with everything at once

Xav: i want this feeling in my chest to go away

Chinye: sleep

Xav: it's 4:30 pm

Chinye: its the best way to get rid of feeling like that

Xav: it will ruin my day

Chinye: listen to music?

Chinye: im not sure

Xav: none of my music is particularly good at making me feel better

Chinye: you could finish koboyashi

Xav: i watch it with friends

Chinye: watch an anime from my list

Chinye: anything 8 and above is good

Xav: im too lazy to do anything new

Chinye: have you seen no.6?

Chinye: its shonnen ai

Chinye: but its really lite

Chinye: and good

Chinye: im thinking about going to sleep

Chinye: im really tired

Chinye: despite sleeping a bunch

Xav: okay

Chinye: not sure yet

Xav: dont ruin your sleep schedule this weekend

Xav: i want you to go to work on monday

Chinye: thanks dad

Chinye: :P

Xav: sorry, just can't think of anything funny atm

Chinye: lol you dont have to

Chinye: go eat a sanger

Chinye: or whatever u called them

Xav: i just feel frail and stale

Chinye: stale?

Chinye: you are a really nice person

Chinye: and i really think you brighten people around you

Chinye: a mood booster

Xav: it;s not enough

Chinye: its some though

Chinye: better than being someone who brings others down

Chinye: if everyone was like that

Chinye: things would be great

Xav: i;m going to be a pig and order food now

Chinye: wish i did that

Chinye: the sub i had when i woke up was gross

Chinye: lol

Xav: hoping mum won't look at the credit card bill

Xav: she was suggesting i make something for myself

Xav: but im just so weak

Xav: i didn't even make that sandwich i said i was going to make

Chinye: want me to paypal u money

Xav: no

Chinye: so u can order food

Chinye: and u just pay me back somehow

Xav: somehow will be in 2 years

Xav: maybe more

Chinye: it doesnt have to be with money n

Chinye: nerd

Xav: i've given you all i have

Chinye: what would food even cost

Chinye: like $20?

Xav: this place's minimum order is $20

Xav: the HSP was 13.50

Chinye: just let me know if u want me to

Chinye: and i'll paypal u it

Xav: i got a milkshake but it was shit

Chinye: you dont even have to give back

Xav: i can't let you do that

Chinye: i dont want you to get yelled at

Xav: Mum doesn't yell

Chinye: sorry

Chinye: shamed at

Xav: i can deal with it

Chinye: you dont have to if u let me help

Chinye: but ok

Chinye: its up to you

Xav: i just can't sorry

Chinye: ok...