#buttondowns

[inkskinned]

it isn't really complicated, but i still can't tell my grandma about it. my girlfriend is also my boyfriend and i'm her girlboyfriend and there are a lot of days this feels like smoothing sheets over a good mattress. it feels like getting a cup of good hot chocolate. we paint our nails lesbian flag pink, and i watch her eyelashes make shadows on her cheeks. she wants to kiss me because i am really good at baking, and i want to kiss her because when i am freaked out about how i spilled coffee, she just hands me extra napkins and helps me clean. he is so handsome i want to eat my fist. they once just winked at me and i couldn't talk for like the next fifteen minutes.

i haven't seen the L word and i was raised catholic. my earliest experiences with queer relationships were through harrowing conversations and hushed questions and blood on the ground. i didn't like boys soon enough. what, are you gay? asked to a 6th grader, almost like a demand.

when she is asleep next to me and i can feel the dreams run up and down her body, i pretend we are both somewhere in the stars. i like to picture a future full of fruit trees, and writing him poetry. sometimes she wakes up, has a whole conversation with me, goes back to sleep, and utterly forgets that we ever even spoke. she is always kind to me, even in that liminal half-there ghost. i like the croaked, raw way her voice sounds in the very-early morning, the way she always seems surprised i'm still here, and home.

on the internet, there are a lot of people who would be annoyed by both of us, and how labels must be pruned into orchids. a box has to hold and define the insides. people must be organized.

we went on a date last night, and the host said, oh, table for 2 nice ladies? neither of us are ladies, but also we are very much 2 nice ladies. i have been wearing her sweater nonstop. he has frequently been forced into wearing my taylor swift official merch quarter-zip because i was worried about him catching a chill, and you simply cannot be cool in an official taylor swift quarter-zip. do not worry: they listen to better music than i do, and their voice sounds like leaves falling.

i wear the skirts and makeup and i am better with spackle and know how to drive stick. recently someone commented on my work - you're just a man trying to reappropriate lesbian spaces. sometimes i feel like she is a clementine to me, and sometimes i feel like he is a german shepherd and sometimes i feel they are a bird. i like watching his hands over a guitar. can i write this poem, even? how can you be a lesbian if you're sometimes with a man? or you are the man?

how can i, huh. you know, our first date lasted 3 days. we'd been flirting for over a year before i finally asked her out. i'd already written her into poetry. she'd already written me into songs.

last night, in the late night, when they woke up again, confused about where they were, they said - oh, thank god. this is your arm. there's just something so precious to me about the specifics, the denotation that the arm was (thank god!) mine. i really liked that definition. i liked the obvious relief because i understand it.

i say yeah, i have a partner. i mean - oh. thank god. it's your arm.

[anthonyknaape]

[leaveharmony]

Me: Oh, so one of his true dirtbags this time

Also me: Still hot, though

[hellsballz]

a little geo doodle for all the based people out there who love him but hes in one of my outfits

[teddykaczynski]

theres this one snlnsketch i love that uve literally only seen once bc in it kate mckinnon is dressed like my ultimate sexual fantasy and i cant handle it

[ty-bayonet-betteridge]

in the temp agency lobby straight up about to vomit

[b-plot-butch]

my brother is having a party and when i got home and saw the girls that were there. god. i feel like some shambling freak.

[transman-badass]

For those who are open to receiving newsletters etc from writers, I have a question.

Reblogs really appreciated!!

[so-i-did-this-thing]

do you have a skintone undershirt on in that photo with your new sweater? i'd love to find some

Just a coincidence! This is an old graphic tee from threadless.

However, if folks have resources for clothing specifically intended to match skintones, they should feel free to chime in. :)

[treycloverthirstclub]

Guess who made a Skully inspired halloween outfit yesterday in a fit of late night delirium inspiration

[sphylor]

i need to take cool pictures of myself with my guitat maybe ill do that now while i cant sleep

[mxnd-infxction]

le sigh . n-e-ways concert fit

[outsideyourhousewithaknife]

I wonder if people can tell I'm gay . . .

[tryslora]

newsletter!

I have created an author mailing list!

Thank you, folks, for the recommendation of Buttondown--it is stripped down and does exactly what I need and I will probably be happy to pay for it should I ever somehow get more than 100 subscribers. (I will be doing dances of glee should I get more than 100 subscribers).

So far I have subscribed to my own list and sent out a test email. I need to do some more template formatting, I know, and I will get there. Someday there will be a header image. For now, however, straight text with some formatting will have to do.

So, if anyone wants to subscribe to my fledgling newsletter, you should be able to do so via my Buttondown page.

I don't plan to post a newsletter more than monthly, unless I've got an imminent THING happening. There will probably be more posts in lead-up days to an indy release, or while a crowdfunding campaign for PHU print editions via DPP is happening. I'll send out a convention schedule if I'm on programming. But I don't want to spam anyone.

I did manage to get the form to subscribe embedded properly into my official Author Site. My next steps are getting it linked on other social media (and setting up a Carrd site because yes, I'm aware that's a thing I should have, too).

My big next step with the author page is getting a contact me form set up. Last one I tried just wasn't working out for me. I've got another one that I think will work better.

I may not be making words, but it's been a productive November at least.

[butch-boi-blues]

Anyways I hope the lesbians in my phone are having a good night lol

[always-coffee]

Newsletter

Darlings! Your friendly reminder that I have a newsletter! It's free. You can sign up here:

I hope you'll subscribe! (Apologies for the large photo of my face.) It's pretty varied and often just whatever's on my mind.