#chaotic jenmish

[certain-blue-eyes]

We need this footage from every angle possible. Please!!! 🥹💚💙

[Credit to @/s_verasani on Instagram]

[miaintheimpala]

I think sometimes we forget that Misha is just as unhinged about Cas as Jensen is about Dean, but Misha is slightly, SLIGHTLY more subtle about it, so it gets overshadowed by Jensen's Dean fever.

[wemakeitupaswego]

Only if Reddit Straight men knew how obsessive Jensen is over one straight clarified Misha Collins 😌

[derogatoryapparently]

So chaotic.

[the-rollerchloster]

Parasocial relationships are strange. Parasocial relationships in a fandom like this one can be even stranger.

I want to preface this by saying that everyone is entitled to their feelings, and feelings are sometimes completely irrational. I am also aware that sometimes our feelings are driven by incomplete thoughts, and have a tendency to overwhelm us and those around us before we can process them. In saying that, I have seen a lot of conflicting emotions and reactions to the reveal that Misha Collins has a "serious" girlfriend (and a large cock apparently, but that is a whole other thing), and I know I shouldn't be surprised by it, but part of me is.

There was a conversation in my discord server over the complicated feelings people have about this news. As a cockles-friendly space this was to be expected, as any new development in the lives of either half of JenMish often spurs these kinds of conversations, but as it started to get emotional I was thanked for bringing some perspective. I hope that I can help anyone who also needs a different way of viewing this situation by making this post, while also helping myself to organise my own chaotic and complicated thoughts.

As I understand it, during the It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time event at this weekend's Burbank convention, Misha told a fun anecdote about gift-giving with his new girlfriend and her daughter, wherein Misha got some things delivered to said girlfriend directly from Amazon, and girlfriend wrapped them for the daughter including what she thought was a microphone but was actually another similarly shaped item not intended for children at all. He continued to say that this "microphone" was for his girlfriend so she wouldn't need to go searching elsewhere for intimacy, as they are currently living in separate states. Now, I was not at the event, and the lack of recordings (recording was strictly prohibited, so if you've got one shame on you, I don't want to know about it!) means that everything I will ever know about this story and the way it was told to the small audience who were lucky enough to be able to attend this event comes as a form of the Telephone game, and therefore lacks a whole lot of body language, tone and context. We, as a fandom, have been severely burnt by this kind of missing nuance before - think DenverCon'21 - and it's these kinds of kneejerk reactions that have the potential to spiral out of control and limit the things we get told at future events - think bishagate.

Think for a second about your personal perception of Misha Collins. He's chaotic, he can be a little self-deprecating or self-effacing, he likes to turn serious anecdotes into jokes. He is also a passionate and caring man, who has a lot of respect and appreciation for his fans. Think about the way he tells anecdotes at standard con panels - it's often a bit tongue-in-cheek, a bit sarcastic, a bit exaggerated - so why would his behaviour at this event, which was specifically set up for Misha to tell stories he wouldn't normally have the space to do in a convention setting, be any different?

I am going to go through my thoughts on some of the things I have seen mentioned about what this all means…

First off, the elephant in the room, what does this mean for Cockles? To me, absolutely nothing. Whatever Jensen and Misha have going on completely transcends a standard sexual and/or romantic relationship. Misha was in his relationship with Vicki for the majority of his life, including when he met Jensen, and we all know she literally wrote a book on polyamory; his perception of relationships is literally shaped and moulded by this, and it's not something he's going to just switch off. Danneel has been a permanent fixture in the cockles dynamic this entire time as well. The JenMish panel at Burbank this weekend will hopefully alleviate any of the doubt anyone is having here, and give us some knowledge that regardless of how Misha defines his relationship status, things will continue in the same chaotic, loving and ridiculous nature we've become accustomed to.

Which segues nicely into the implication that the vibrator was purchased so she wouldn't stray, and therefore their relationship is monogamous. See above thoughts about tongue-in-cheek, exaggerated and self-effacing - when I imagine him telling this story, I see that cheeky, gummy grin going the whole time. Without the nuance of watching this unfold, I think we are all safest to assume that this was a joke, not a firm declaration that he has left his polyamorous attitudes behind.

On thoughts of him "moving on too soon" from his marriage and subsequent divorce, this is where my own feelings get complicated as well, but also where we need to remember that the key feature of a parasocial relationship is that we only see and know what he wants us to. We don't actually know what the trigger for that dissolution was, so in terms of the actual calendar timing it might seem soon, but emotional development and change doesn't run on a standard calendar. We don't know how long the process was before the decision was made to separate. I am currently working through a messy separation, and while I can pinpoint the decision to somewhere in the past 6-12 months, my marriage has realistically been dead for 3+ years, and we're a (supposedly) monogamous couple. As a poly couple, I can imagine that Misha and Vicki worked through every alternative option possible before landing on the decision to formally separate, and had probably well and truly been through the mourning period before it was even all over. Adult relationships are complex at the best of times, and no one ever truly knows what is happening in them except the people involved. I also think that as a man who is nearing 50 and just come out of very long term relationship, that he doesn't actually know how to be "alone", nor does he want to…

Lastly, for some of us, this is someone important in our lives who has found happiness in another person when perhaps we don't have that for ourselves. When those feelings hit, they can be extremely disheartening, and I want to send all my loving thoughts to anyone who falls into this category. It's difficult when the envy turns your stomach in knots and then your thoughts spiral into all the things wrong that mean that no matter how much you want to you can't just be happy for someone. Love and life are complicated, human beings are complicated, society is complicated. There is this hugely widespread and toxic mentality that we are all raised on that says we are halves of something that is destined to find our other half in order to feel whole, and it's utter bullshit. We shouldn't need one singular significant other to feel complete, and sometimes we get so determined to find that someone that we end up sacrificing ourselves to make them fit. (see also; Daniel Sloss' thoughts on this subject in his stand-up special Jigsaw)

There are many different kinds of love, many different kinds of relationships, and many different kinds of people. If anyone proves that to us, it's Misha Collins. He is walking evidence that human life is chaotic and unpredictable and indeterminate and we can make our own fucking rules. I hope that we can collectively be respectful of him, no matter what (or who) he chooses, and feel grateful for everything he trusts us enough to share.

[lillysilverus]

I know hellers will never admit it nor will anyone (even I cannot believe I am saying) but jared and misha panels are far far entertaining and interesting than their jenmish panel. They have more chemistry than other two even it is a lot chaotic. I think it is jared that can make anyone more interesting. I used to keep a neutral stand but with misha obsession over destiel and jensen made me lose the least respect I had for him. It is getting pathetic.

To be honest, I really don't watch Misha's panels even with Jared. I don't dislike Misha, I just am not really interested in him. That being said, I always found Castiel and Sam's interaction much more interesting and entertaining than his interaction with Dean. He and Sam's shenanigans were fun and you never knew what they were going to get up to and I wish they had explored their friendship more because of the way it started. And I think that hellers have made any interaction between Misha and Jensen or Castiel and Dean just hard to watch. I think at first Misha played into it because he found it entertaining but then he realized it kept his character relevant with his fans and then I think he realized that it's pretty much all that is relevant so he couldn't extract himself. It is pathetic.

[theyarebothgunshot]

Your tag under this post here so true. Also the post itself. I'm always having a blast when everyone is joined in the craziness, but at the same time I'm always exhausted afterwards 😆

lmao yes so true, it is chaotic in the best way hfdhhsf but i finally have time to freak out some more after being a "responsible adult" all day......

it's been a while since i have done a compilation like this but i dont wanna clog the dash and it's all about the same thing so here we goooo

Jensen did everything in his power to stomp the J*2 narrative into dust this weekend. Love that journey for him!

listen, i am not one to be petty (lol okay sometimes i am, ngl) but.... the difference was SO stark this time, it has to be said

I was obviously hoping for some good cockles content this con, but this has exceeded everything I could have thought of lol. Amazing.

my expectations were pretty managed after we got interrupted so early last time, but this indeed exeeded everything!!

Gonna have a difficult week... And difficult four months until I leave work... But I'm so hyped but today's Cockles nothing's gonna stop me - tea anon

i'm sorry you are gonna face some hard times <3 you know i am here when you want to talk! thankfully jenmish gave us enough seretonin for a life time hdgfhdg

First we get Mish. Dee. Now we have Jensen, Danneel and their boyfriend Misha. Truly could not have predicted them being *that* unhinged but I do love to see it! Going to need about 10 business days to process it all though lmaoooo - Honeymoon Anon

you and me both!!

The thing is, there is absolutely no reason for them to act like that, none. like, can you imagine jensen making that kind of jokes toward jp lmaoooo he'd rather unalive himself💀 but then again, misha is his close friend so , what's the difference hmmm🫠 they are driving me insane Rose

*kermit nodding gif* yeah..... it is a lot lmfaooo

“tell jensen i mentioned him first”

twitter.com/misskittybsdc/status/1630013886844764160?s=46&t=oQYacDuBE2cwV9RJV-7UJg

they wanna score points with the big boss ghdhgh

Rose it's 5 am and I haven't slept yet and I am so not normal about this. I have been around a lot of JIBs so I knew what was coming. Yet, I still am so overwhelmed by everything that happened. I have watched the cockles panel twice by now. Some scenes I have definitely watched more than 20 times. I have perceived more and more details every time I rewind. Jensen Ackles butt wiggling. Him winking at Misha. That weird expression on his face when he made a wish. The movement of chairs, which is, of course - as it always is every JIB - closer together. The weird non-improvisation of the improvisation. Daniela coming in with the CW sniper in the form of a birthday cake to stop Jensen coming out as Misha Collins' boyfriend. Not to mention all the other big things that happened. Canary? Kissing Misha? When in Rome??? The preparation of Misha's 50th birthday party. Misha and Jensen playing an European puppet show with Misha shouting "Dieter I love you! Kiss me Dieter". Rose. Jensen said Misha is Danneel's boyfriend. Jensen said Misha is his boyfriend. The underbear and straddlegate have walked so that this Jibcon panel could run. How am I supposed to sleep? I am not even attending a convetion yet the convention high is keeping me restless. I feel like I need a continuation. Like this was a series finale with a cliffhanger that needs to be resolved. Like there are things that need to come up so this can settle. I have been a cockles perceiver since years yet my patience is limited right now. I mean if I wait a day or two I know it will wear of. It always does. But the boyfriend will stay. Right here with us.

- anon anon (you know who I am)

ahhhhh i totally feel you!! i had to physically make myself go to bed last night because i had to get up early, but it took a LOT to finally go to bed and i slept poorly ngl hfgdhhg i hope you did manage to get some sleep though!! and oof. what a year yesterday was!!!

Also @ all the other anons, I remember you guys, too!!! ♥️ I don't know if you remember me though haha

- anon anon

ahww i'm sure they do!! <3

You Know what i have realised. This weekend have felt like a fan fic of dean and cas but instead of reading it i was watching it.

you're not wrong!!

Ok also at the end of angeles he glances at misha then suddenly stops playing and looks away sooooo bashful. Did you show too much jensen? Did you get nervous when you made eye contact???

👻anon

head in my fucking hands!!!!! jensen.... sweetie....... why sing that song huh????? answer quickly (also hiiii omg love seeing you in my inbox!!)

jensen singing angeles with misha there watching (and at some points singing directly to misha) seems like fanfic AND YET…

and yet..........

[certain-blue-eyes]

So the staring in the eyes between Dean and Cas was Jensen and Misha forgetting their lines. But seriously - why did they forget their lines in the first place? 👀

[sunglassesmish]

Hi 👋

Greetings from Mexico, my name is Paty and I just want to say that I love your blog.

After the “Mishap” I decided to delete my old blog and just give up on tumblr, but we’ll my love for our boys (aka Mish and Jen) was bigger than anything and I created this new blog. My goal was to only follow blogs that were JenMish friendly and mostly hate free and that is how I found your blog.

I love all your fimmf posts, and your comments and the pictures. I love that you always try to find a balance between Jen and Mish and that no matter what you always try to find the positive side of things.

Thank you for being this kind of person.

I send your ways lots of hugs and kisses.

PS. You can choose to publish this or not I don’t care either way 😀

hi Paty!!! so i don’t know how you expect me not to post this because this is the best thing i’ve ever heard. i’ve had quite a long day already and coming home to this was just. it was perfect.

when i say this was my reaction, im being 100% serious.

i can’t say what it means to me that you find my blog a safe space in all this madness that is the fandom! because sometimes i think i go too far and it’s hard for me personally to know where to draw the line.

i’m glad you came back to tumblr even if it is chaotic here, because this place is better with you in it. i appreciate all the tags you leave and when you reblog my fimmf posts and comment on my ranty posts, i notice every single one.

and im so glad you’ve joined me and this fandom and continue to spread the love for jensen and misha! it’s always nice to see new people, or have people come back :)

i am sending you DOUBLE the love and hugs and kisses and i hope you have/had an amazing day!!! thanks for being here 🥰💗💗

[thetiredstuff]

I just found you because you told @regardingjenmish how you found them and I follow that blog since forever, so that's really cool! Destiel and Jenmish in whatever form is my jam.

hi!!!

i hope you'll have a good time here! and yeah they're a really cool blog, right?! i appreciate how level-headed and kind they always are but at the same time chaotic about stuff we are all chaotic about. perfect mix!

thanks for following (hope you don't regret it lol)

[the-rollerchloster]

Hi.Do you still have a discord server for spn/The Winchesters fans??

Hello! 👋

I have a discord server for lovers of all things DeanCas and JenMish, where we discuss everything from Supernatural and The Winchesters (lots of clowning going on right now 🤡) to other Jensen and Misha projects, other ships, share art and fics, help each other with fandom and non-fandom projects, and just generally talk a lot of nonsense in between.

More info, including the invite link, can be found over on the @sunshineshellers blog. We are a smallish server of less than 100 members, and depending on the chaos of the day we can have up to 25ish active members from various places around the world. We are unhinged in a fun way, and chat often devolves into less than savoury topics, and our mod affectionately calls us the GayDHD server.

If chaotic chatter and Jensen/Misha are your thing, come join us!

[rosstrytobe]

"I live it"

[littlewetbeast]

obsessed with the fact that the ‘trick’ to get jensen to do something was to get misha to ask him. it’s not enough that misha played a character in such an intriguing way on a tv show and became so popular they were unable to permanently fire him. or that misha can make a single tweet and the whole fandom goes feral. no. turns out one of the main stars of the show is so whipped that misha is the key to get him to do anything. no single man should be allowed this much power

[theyarebothgunshot]

anyone else slowly watching every jenmish jib panel to prep for two weeks from now only to realize just how gd chaotic and fond of each other they were on stage. i hadn’t watched in a while and totally thought i had been exaggerating it in my head. 🥲 if i could get even a fraction of that energy this time i’ll be content.

that is so valid of you, and i might do the same soon.... they are quite literally thee fondest people to look at each other, ever. you can't change my mind!!! i want that energy this time as well, but also for myself god bless

[derogatoryapparently]

So......everybody ready for next Tuesday? The anticipation is starting to build over here.

[casismymrdarcy]

In regards of hits after hits we get this week and the upcoming panel.