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ttttaehyungie · 5 years ago

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sincerely, but no longer yours | chapter 3

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sincerely, but no longer yours | ex!kim namjoon x reader

genre | angst, exes au

summary | It started as a coping mechanism as getting the words out provided a form of catharsis. But now you can’t stop writing these love letters, even with the knowledge that they’ll never get sent. After all, who writes love letters to their ex?

word count | 3.9k

chapter rating | PG-13

warnings | none

a/n | here we gooooo!! part threeeee c: can’t believe I actually churned this out when my life has been in c h a o s also this is barely edited im so sorry

Percussive knocks rap crisply on your apartment door. You fling the door open and your heart leaps in your chest at the sight. There he stands.

Up and rising dance instructor. Groove personified. Ball of literal sunshine.

And in your experience, the best big brother on the planet.

The overnight bag hits the wooden floor with a hollow thud as he abandons it in favor of yanking you into a tight embrace. A grin widens on your face that you're certain mirrors his.

"Hoseok," you breathe into his chest, your face smushed against his oversized yellow shirt. The enveloping warmth of his arms around you has you melting. "I've missed you so much."

"I've missed you more. Let me take a good look at you." He puts you at arm's length. "You've grown so much in the time we've been apart."

"Hoseok." You roll your eyes, but the smile on your face doesn’t falter. "It's only been a month."

"Hey. A lot happens in a month."

The truth of his words, unknown to him but oddly relevant nonetheless, has you biting your lip before you can stop yourself.

"Here, I'll help you with your bag," you say, hauling the duffel bag off the ground, giving you something else to look at. You can only hope that Hoseok hasn't already picked up on the nervous blips. "It's been a long ride for you."

"And they say chivalry is dead," he jokes, but follows after you without further comment. Guess you're in the clear.

But you steer the conversation to a topic that you know will engross him for sure. Y’know. Just in case.

"So, what classes did you sign up for this weekend?" you ask over your shoulder, managing a tone so casual that you celebrate internally.

"You'll never believe it.” The words come tumbling out, voice shimmering with excitement. Even without turning to look at him, you can picture the way his eyes are surely set alight. You know this tone, and it has you hooked now, the anticipation of amazing news builds in your chest. "Y'know that choreographer, Jo? The one that's completely booked out every single weekend?”

You nod quickly, turning to look at him with wide eyes.

“Well.” The smugness in his tone is thick. “Guess who got a slot for her class!”

Genuine surprise elicits a gasp from you. "No way! How'd you even manage that?"

"Hard work and sheer determination.” A fist pump punctuates his words. “I camped on the booking site on multiple devices with multiple accounts so I could snag a spot the moment the slots open."

You snort at his antics.

"I can't believe I'm going to be learning from such a giant in the industry," he says, unable to resist breaking into a little dance as he pushes the door to the study cum guest room open. "It feels like I've won the freaking lottery."

The effervescent excitement is uncontainable. Even the task of unpacking can’t interrupt his rave about the choreographer who shot to cyber fame with her fluid movements. You let him let it loose, leaning against the doorway, watching him.

"Ok," he says, putting his hands on his hips. "That's enough about me. How did your lecture go today?"

The breath catches in your lungs, the shock of seeing Namjoon coming back in a second wave.

“It was alright,” you attempt to mask it in the same casual tone you mustered up just minutes ago. But there’s an unmistakable tightness to your words.

Hoseok’s eyes bore into you. Damn. There’s no escaping now.

“____?” he probes, his tone laced with the same concern lying in his gaze.

"Hey, um," you rub at your arms, "we have an unexpected dinner guest tonight. Is that ok with you?"

“____,” he repeats, firmer this time. “What happened?"

You exhale heavily, grounding yourself with the feel of the carpet underneath your scrunched up toes as you tell him, "I bumped into Joon today. At the lecture."

Chancing a glance at him to gauge his reaction, you watch as he schools his features into an expressionless mask. But his eyes widen by just a fraction, betraying his surprise as he processes the information.

After a second, he nods stiffly, and turns back to the duffel bag on the bed to take the last of his belongings out. His tone is measured and even as he asks, "How was it?"

The plush mattress provides you marginal comfort as you plop onto the bed next to him.

"Honestly? Like a punch in the gut." The laugh that escapes you is bitter. "When will I stop being winded just by the mere sight of him, Hobi?"

The smile he shoots you is empathetic but sad. He reaches over to muss up your hair, the action tender and fond. "It'll happen in time," he promises.

The restrictive tightness in your chest is uncomfortable and you attempt to expel it in a sigh as you lean backwards, propped up by the elbow. Staring at your toes as if they’re a source of endless fascination gives you an excuse not to look your brother in the eye.

“But would you care to explain what convinced you to invite him to dinner?”

“Hobi… I just…” Your back hits the mattress as you flop back entirely, groaning up at the ceiling. No choice but to spit the truth out now. “His eyes, they just do things to me.”

Craning your neck to look at him, regret hits you when you catch sight of his frown. You drop your head back down. The ceiling's a much better option to look at.

“You have a soft spot for him.” It’s less a question and more a statement. A statement that you assent to with a strangled noise.

“Look. I get it. It’s just, I worry for you. The state you were in when you came back that night…” This time, he lets out a sigh of his own. The bed shifts, accommodating his weight where he takes a seat next to you. "You were a wreck, ____.” He shakes his head, his brow furrowed. “I don't want to have to relive those days.”

He’s not speaking out of turn. Guilt gnaws at you and you turn your head to face the wall. Bringing Namjoon back into your life implicated Hoseok too. Your brokenness had not been yours to bear alone. On the nights when you felt like you were falling apart, it was your brother who’d held you as you sobbed damp spot after damp spot into his t-shirts.

“Do you think it's too soon?” Your voice sounds small even in your ears. “Even though it's been years?”

“I can’t answer that for you, ____.”

You remain quiet, still staring at the blank wall.

“Well." He slaps his hands on his thighs and hauls himself off the bed, breaking the silence. "I owe him a long overdue meet-up anyway. He's been bugging me to have a meal together with him for the longest time now- which is next to impossible, y’know, with the way the studio just keeps getting busier and busier.”

A hand enters your field of vision, outstretched and waiting. "Dinner?"

You grasp it and he pulls you up. His grip is a firm anchor, both physically and emotionally.

"Dinner," you echo. "I can do this."

You can’t do this.

Whatever idealism you had possessed an hour ago within the safe confines of your apartment was gone now, mellowed out and boiled down to unforgiving reality.

At least you have Hoseok.

Despite your earlier hesitation to tell your brother about the events that had transpired through the day, you're now relieved you did and infinitely thankful for his presence. If any iciness remains from whatever lingering unsaid tension that exists between you and Namjoon, it quickly melts away under the warmth that is Hoseok's affability.

It was awkward at first, no doubt. As you slid into the booth to sit across Namjoon, it definitely didn’t escape your attention how he was unable to keep eye contact with you, his shifty eyes stoking the nervousness that simmered in the pit of your stomach.

The conversation had been polite but stiff, filled with small talk about each other’s jobs. As if you didn’t already know all about how he’d made it as a published author from all the times you eavesdropped on Hobi’s phone calls. He was in the middle of narrating his book’s main plot when your mind’s eye jumped, involuntarily, to the books guiltily buried away in the corner of your closet underneath a bunch of t-shirts. It was an impulse buy, you lie to yourself.

Yes, you’ve read his books. Multiple times. Pored over every word and analyzed every character in search of snippets of yourself. Hoping to know whether he’s forgotten you and moved on from you or whether he’s still affected by the breakup in the same way you don’t dare to admit that you are.

But that’s just in your times of weakness. Everyone has those, you reason, and you’re allowed to too.

Make no mistake- you did get over Namjoon. The box of letters sits in your desk drawer as the fruits of that. There’s a reason why you can’t bring yourself to dump those letters out after all these years. They’re unfiltered and ugly and raw, but they’re an archive of the journey you went through. You’re over it.

Or you were over it. Being in this city and seeing him triggers something in you and seems to throw you back a couple of steps somehow.

Maneuvering your way through the exchange, carefully feigning ignorance about the plot of his novels, you were walking a tightrope. But thankfully, before you could get caught in your self-spun web of lies, the conversation takes a sharp left.

In a sudden outburst of, “Why are we speaking as if we’re at some corporate networking event?!” accompanied by a smack on the table, Hoseok shattered the cordial but fake and, frankly, uncomfortable atmosphere that had settled over the booth. The three of you broke into genuine laughter for the first time in the evening. And finally, the dinner conversation took a more casual and informal turn.

In spite of your wariness, the pull that Hoseok’s words exerted was irresistible and you found yourself gradually loosening up. It began with unbidden smiles that progressed to quiet giggles- not unlike the one that followed Hoseok’s earlier outburst- that quickly gave way to carefree and unfiltered laughter.

And now?

"Remember when you broke the swingset at our house?" Hoseok jabs his fork at Namjoon who sits across from him at the table.

"That was not on me,” he quips. “That swingset was rickety before I sat on it."

Your throat constricts around your food slightly painfully with the way you gulp down your food to interject, "No way, Joon. We only had that swingset for two weeks before you broke it."

Hoseok nods in corroboration, his features colored in a grave seriousness. “She’s right. I remember my joy on that swingset being extremely short-lived.”

"Can't believe you care more about that swingset than me." Namjoon pouts. "My butt was bruised for at least a week from that accident."

But Hoseok dismisses this with a wave of his hand. "Bruises heal. Swingsets don't."

You smile around the rim of your glass, taking a swig. Cheeks sore with how much you’ve been smiling, you think, you really can’t do this.

You've missed this. You’ve missed the days filled with this innocent and untroubled feeling of happiness. When it was just this pair of best friends and you were the little sister that just tagged along at first, but got pulled in as a real member of the trio. You were the little sister that Hobi adored, and the little sister that Joon had always wished he'd had, and you looked up to both of them so much.

The playful teasing between mouthfuls of food and the easy laughter shared as all three of you let loose over a couple drinks has you warming up in a way that's not just from the alcohol.

You’ve missed this. But you can’t.

You glance upwards and the softness in Namjoon’s eyes all crinkled up by his beaming smile has you realizing just how much you’ve missed him. But you can’t, you can’t, you ca-

Next to you, Hoseok’s movements interrupt your internal self-admonishment. He sets his utensils down with a clang on his empty plate. "Hey, I’ll go pick up the bill."

"Let me." Namjoon fumbles for his wallet as he gets on his feet. But Hoseok puts a hand on his shoulder to sit him back down.

"Nah man, you paid the last time and I've been meaning to give ____ a treat too. This one's on me."

Hoseok disappears off to settle the bill, leaving just you and Namjoon. In stark contrast to his earlier inability to maintain eye contact, he’s now staring intently at you. The intensity of his gaze has your cheeks growing warm.

It’s your turn to struggle with eye contact. Unsure what to do with your hands or where to look, you're just about to succumb to the urge to start fidgeting when Namjoon sighs, inciting a stolen glance at him. His gaze is on his hands now where they sit on the table, a gentle smile gracing his features.

"I've missed this,” he says softly.

You can’t, you can’t, you can’t.

"Me too," you admit. You’re weak.

His gaze darts back upwards to look you in the eyes, and your heart rate picks up.

“I've missed you.”

It’s shy. It’s barely audible. But you catch it. It startles your heart into a racing pulse, pounding in your ribcage.

"Namjoon.” You don’t miss the way his face falls slightly at how you revert to his full name. “You can't-"

He leans forward as he shakes his head. "I'm not... I..." He cuts himself off with a huff of frustration. His long fingers tap rapidly on the table the way they always do when he’s collecting his thoughts.

"I'm really sorry for what happened, ____.” His eyes bore into yours with a pleading sincerity that has your hands fidgeting under the table and out of sight. “I'm really sorry that things ended the way they did. And I know I don't deserve to be asking this, ____. But I've really missed... all this." He gestures to the booth, to your trio. "And I guess what I'm asking is, will you forgive me? And... will it be okay to see you again? Just as friends. Nothing more."

You can’t. You can’t. You can’t.

You fold your hands in your lap, still hidden away from sight so he can’t see the nervous energy they exude as you deliberate your next words carefully.

"Joon, you really hurt me the last time. Really deeply.” The temptation to avert your gaze is immense, but you power through. But that leaves you to witness the flicker of guilt in his eyes. “And as nice as tonight was, I'm just not sure if I'm ready to have you back in my life completely yet."

“Ok, I understand. That's fair. I have no rights to make any demands on you when things ended the way they did.”

His eyes are downcast and he trails off into silence.

But just as you’re about to heave a sigh of relief, thinking he’s dropped it, he starts again, the hesitation clear in his shaky voice, "Can I give you my number? So you can think it over and text me if you ever want to be friends again. Like what you said, tonight was really nice."

His hand hovers over where your phone sits on the table, tentative without your go-ahead.

“Or you can just decide to throw it out and delete me from your life forever,” he begins rambling nervously. “I'll respect that too. I just can't leave things the way they are without doing anything I can to attempt to make reconciliation happen.”

You can’t. You can’t. You can’t.

That’s when you make the fatal mistake of looking him in the eye. The way he's looking at you…

You can’t. Or can you?

Like what you told Hoseok, you’re close to powerless when Namjoon looks at you like that.

Relenting, you flip his hand around and place your phone into his waiting palm.

"Okay. Fine. I'll think about it."

"Thank you,” he says breathily. His dimpled smile and eyes aglow send your heartbeat stuttering.

As Namjoon's keying his phone number into your phone, Hoseok returns. The action doesn't go unnoticed by him, and the way he eyes your phone in Namjoon's hands has you squirming in your seat slightly. But Namjoon, gleeful with the hope of possible reconciliation, is none the wiser.

You, meanwhile, know that you’re in for a lot of explaining.

“It’s just a number, Hoseok,” you say the moment the subway pulls out of the station and away from Namjoon’s waving figure. It’s been sitting heavy on your tongue ever since the restaurant, and you take the first chance you get to spit it out. Never has the walk from the diner to the station felt so long.

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Yeah,” you fold your arms, stumbling slightly on the rickety carriage, but you maintain your indignant expression, “but your look said everything.”

You exhale heavily as you grip back onto the grab pole. You continue, softer this time, “He’s just asking to be friends.”

Hoseok purses his lips and the silence sits for a moment.

“What are you thinking?” he eventually asks.

“I don’t know.” You shrug. “It’s just… a lot. What happened between us was a lot.”

You clear your throat and continue, “But the years of friendship in our little trio were a lot too. And tonight was a huge reminder of how good things used to be… of how good things could be.”

“So, what are you gonna do?”

“I don’t know.” You repeat, looking back at Hoseok now. “What should I do?”

“I can’t decide that for you.”

What a classic Hoseok response. Why did you even ask?

“He’s genuinely sorry,” you murmur, speaking more to yourself than to your brother.

“He is,” Hoseok affirms, his eyes softening now as he nods in agreement.

“And it’ll be just friends, nothing more.” Again, you’re not entirely sure of whether your words are meant to be consoling your brother or yourself.

“Do you want that? Being friends with him again and having him in your life again?”

Do you?

You try to consider it rationally, you really do.

But the emotions overtake you. Perhaps it’s from tonight’s dinner, a sampling of what it’d be like to have him as a friend again. Perhaps it’s the recognition of how wasteful it truly is to dump decades of friendship out the window.

Or perhaps it’s the revelation that you could never be angry with Namjoon, as much as you want to be. And you really want to be. He deserves it. After the way he let your relationship end without putting up a fight, after he left you shattered and the way you had to piece yourself back together shard by shard in the aftermath, he deserves your wrath.

But you can’t do it.

Especially not now when his repentance is so sincere. Not when he’s earnestly trying to make things right.

So do you want him back in your life? It’s irrational, it’s dumb, it’s risky, but you honestly could never help yourself when it comes to Namjoon.

“Yes,” you decide. “I’ve missed him, Hobi. I know it’s dumb to miss him after all these years and after what he did, but I still do.”

Hoseok slings an arm around you and pulls you into his chest. “Yeah, it’s pretty dumb,” he says, and you snort as you swat at his chest. “But if that’s how you feel, then that’s how you feel.”

“It’s been so strange,” comes your quiet admission. “He’s just always been there, y’know? And not having him around feels like having a limb missing.”

“Mmhm.” It’s barely a sound, but you know it’s Hoseok’s way of saying he understands, and it fills you with a deep sense of assurance and validation.

The train pulls to a stop, and you realize with a jolt that it’s your station. Reluctantly, you pull away from the hug and tug Hoseok out the doors. “C’mon.”

The apartment is just a few streets down from the station and, with your hands stuffed into the pockets of your jacket, your fists rubbing against the rough denim, you walk along silently. The sound of Hoseok’s footsteps beside you fades into rhythmical ambient noise the deeper you fall into thought.

It’s when you’re unlocking the door to your apartment, keys jangling, that Hoseok asks the very same question that you’ve been mulling over on the walk back.

“Can you forgive him?”

It’s surprising. Even to you. You always imagined it’d play out in either one of two ways- cutting words or punishing silence. But now that the moment has really arrived, you realize just how willing you are to extend forgiveness to him.

“I think I have to,” you begin slowly. “Not for him, but for me, y’know?” You nod, your certainty growing as you verbalize your thoughts. “Yeah. I have to do this. It’s getting tiring carrying all this resentment and bitterness around.”

The lock clicks open and you move to enter the apartment.

“Hey,” Hoseok says, placing a hand on your shoulder gently that has you pausing. “Whatever decision you make, just know that I support you.”

You wrap your brother in a quick side-hug. “Thanks, Hobi. That means a lot to me.”

Rolling over to switch your alarm off, you nestle back under the covers to catch a few more winks.

That’s when it all comes rushing back to you, and your initial plan to snooze is screwed. Did all that really happen? Did you really sit down to have dinner with Namjoon?

And did you really not reject his attempt at a peace offering? Young ____ would be so disappointed.

It feels a little unbelievable. I mean, sure, you’ve run into him more than a couple of times now. But never would you have imagined you would have him truly in your life again.

That is- if you would let him in. You haven’t replied to him, wanting to sleep on your decision for extra clarity.

Clarity, your ass. Through the thick fog of heavy sleep, it all feels like it could be nothing more than a fever dream.

But you can hear Hoseok’s snoring coming from the next room. And the memories of last night- the yellow lighting of the diner, the overly salty fries you kept picking at regardless, the jab of Hobi’s elbow into your side as he teased you, the way your sides ached from laughing so hard, the way those obsidian eyes pulled you in as they set on you from across the table- they’re too vivid to be made up.

And the one thing that will conclusively prove it- you prop yourself up to scroll through your contacts list. There. Sitting in your contacts is his name. The name you’d deleted off your phone all those years ago in a fit of anger, but now restored to its rightful place.

[8.03am] ____: hey joon, it’s ____.

You chew on your lip as you type and delete and re-type and repeat.

[8.07am] ____: do you have any plans for today? wanna do something?

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hotaruyy · 5 years ago

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Mulan (2020): A Scathing Review

Or, an extremely long rant by two extremely mad Chinese girls.

Before we (@hotaruyy and @meow3sensei) watched Mulan (2020), we didn’t expect too much, since the director and screenwriters aren’t Chinese (even though they claimed to want to be more culturally accurate). But holy shit, this film didn’t even fulfill our exceedingly low expectations (and we’re speaking as people who didn’t mind the loss of the musical aspect because look at the Beauty and the Beast live action). Our review will focus on our critiques of the presentation of different aspects of Chinese culture in Mulan (2020).

The Chinese Aspect of the film was especially infuriating to us as a Chinese audience. Disney emphasises that many of the changes made to the film in comparison to the animated film were to accommodate backlash regarding cultural and historical inaccuracies from Chinese audiences, but what we saw on the screen showed otherwise.

On Set Design (By a slightly irritated Architecture student)

Mix and match of architecture from multiple dynasties, which removes a lot of the sense of realism and authenticity from the film

Tang-style architecture is used (and if we’re being specific, Tang with hints of Song Dynasty) in the Imperial City’s set, which one would assume depicts the time period in which the movie is set in. Identified by the wooden balustrades, relatively simple and small dougong, vertical lattice windows, wooden piles for waterfront, organic shapes in landscape architecture etc. (fig. 1)

fig. 1 - Scene in film

Understandably, information on architecture before Tang (618-907AD) is scarce, so I do think there was an attempt at referencing the original poem that was written during the Southern and Northern Northern Wei Dynasty 南北朝北魏 (386-581AD). Taking creative liberty here makes sense.

That being said, the film didn’t care for retaining a consistent style of architecture, resulting in a wormhole of a set that somehow spans five different dynasties. Only two examples will be listed to avoid an entire essay :)

Exhibit A. Mulan’s home in Hakka Tulou 客家圍土樓 (fig. 2) (roughly translates to Hakka Mud Towers), which originated in the Song and Yuan dynasties (960-1368AD), and started maturing in the late Ming dynasty. (Why use something that didn’t even exist when the Ballad was written and by doing so, physically place Mulan in Fujian?? Just put her in an ambiguous village like how the animation did??). Somehow Tulou started existing before the Hakka clan migrated down south :) To put it simply the presence of Tulou is a locational and historical bug. The jump from the Hakka Tulou to the Tang-styled Imperial palace (fig. 3, which is strictly speaking a hybrid of different styles but I’d argue still mostly Tang) in the opening scenes is only a taste of the amount of inconsistencies later seen in the film.

fig. 2 Scene in film - Hakka Tulou

fig. 3 Scene in film - the Imperial Palace

Exhibit B. This scene (1:20:14) showing Qing Dynasty architecture in what is supposed to be a Tang Dynasty setting, identified by more elaborately decorated dougong 斗栱 (fig. 4 a key feature in the structural system in Chinese architecture, referring to the interlocking structure that sits on top of each column; at least three different kinds of dougong from three different dynasties have been spotted in the film).

fig. 4 Examples of different Dougong in Ancient Chinese architecture (top left being a good example of Tang-styled Dougong)

An insignificant building is not supposed to have more glamorous and larger dougong than the Imperial Palace, not to mention the lack of decorative dougong at all during the Tang Dynasty.

fig. 5 Scene in film that features a building with dougong

fig. 6 Shenyang Imperial Palace built in the Qing Dynasty

An actual Qing Dynasty Palace (fig. 6), for reference, and a random scene from the film (fig. 5). Note the larger dougong both fig. 5 and 6 (the ratio of dougong to column is significantly larger) with more layers of interlocking segments, as compared to the Tang-styled dougong that we pointed out earlier.

On Costume Design

Blue fabric on people who are NOT ROYALTY/NOBILITY. Soldiers guarding the imperial gate would not be wearing blue shirts under their armour. There wouldn’t be such a big supply of blue fabric in the first place; blue fabric would absolutely not be mass-produced for soldiers.

Ancient Chinese people made blue dye from crushed butterflies, did no one care enough to consider the sheer amount of wealth it takes to dye blue fabric organically? Soldiers would very simply not be wearing blue fabric because of how expensive these colours were at the time. Artistic liberty is fine but at least make it make sense in a clearly hierarchical society??

The painful inaccuracies in Mulan’s costume in the matchmaking scene (fig. 7). Ah, the scene that managed to translate breathtaking Hanfu (and there are plenty of resources to take inspiration from) into a Western caricature of a Chinese Halloween costume.

fig. 7 Scene in film featuring Mulan’s Hanfu from the matchmaking sequence

There’s nothing wrong with taking artistic liberties for costumes with a historical context. For instance, exaggerating certain characteristics of the era the story is in, or modernizing certain features so that they align with the character’s more modern way of thinking to contrast with the traditional setting. Good examples that come to mind are the costume designs in Marie Antoinette (2006), or Nirvana in Fire (2015), which also happens to be a Chinese period piece set in a fictional, historically ambiguous era. Inspiration for its costume design is taken from the Han Dynasty and the Southern and Northern Dynasties, so its costumes combine clothing silhouettes from the two periods, and use different characteristics such as colour to reflect class and status, and to represent characters’ personalities. It does a really good job of creating a new style while still giving subtle visual cues to the audience.

But Mulan’s dress can hardly be called an interpretation of traditional Chinese clothing. This is something the animated film did poorly on as well, and this probably contributed to the costume design in this film as an adaptation of the cartoon. The fabric had a shiny sheen that cheapened the costume. Coupled with the strange silhouette of the Hanfu (especially the bottom part of the skirt), this further detaches the audience from any hint of authenticity. The pictures below can speak for themselves. If they’re aiming for ambiguity in terms of the dynasties as seen in the set, then at least make something that is visually pleasing??

fig. 8 Evolution of Hanfu

fig. 9 Tang Hanfu recreated with references from Tang artifacts (top: early Tang; bottom: golden era of the Tang period)

For whatever reason it seems like the extras in the background have more accurate costumes than the main character

And as a girl from a farming village why is she being trained like a noble lady??? A question I’ve had since the animated film…

The film wasn’t consistent when taking artistic liberties. Audiences subconsciously make visual connections to historical periods when watching a historical fiction film. It would be visually more cohesive if artistic liberties were taken on elements from one dynasty or by combining elements from dynasties with similar aesthetics, instead of jumping across centuries of very different stylistic approaches.

Basing the set design on the Tang Dynasty, but then including random shots of Qing Dynasty architecture of no particular importance (two very contrasting architectural styles); extras having Tang-style Hanfu, but Mulan not having one that's remotely close to any style of the multiple dynasties the film has taken inspiration from; alluding to the time period in which the ballad was written by painting Mulan’s forehead yellow 黃額妝 (which was poorly done but I digress), a style of makeup used by women of the Six dynasties and the Southern and Northern Dynasties (六朝女子), but everything else alludes to Tang or later. And finally, basing many things off the Tang Dynasty, but the Tang wasn’t in risk of invasion from the Huns or the Rouran??? We’re fucking confused :)

Small details like the ones we’ve listed above are visually off-putting; as an audience member I’m immediately thrown out of whatever universe the film is building due to the contradicting visual cues. If this was Disney’s and the director’s attempt at cultural accuracy, then it’s plainly insulting to the intelligence of their Chinese audience. (Respecting cultural concerns should not be Disney’s scapegoat for producing a bad movie.)

Ultimately, the film is based on a ballad and we wouldn’t say the points we’ve mentioned are considered common knowledge. So let’s treat it as a fictional era and put less significance on historical consistencies and authenticity. Let’s narrow it down to the crude representations (and misrepresentations) of general Chinese culture and society.

On Stereotypes

“Chi”: Why are soldiers receiving chi-related martial arts training, which takes years and years of elite, specialised training and experience? Ordinary soldiers don’t train their chi, they are not Wuxia 武俠 (roughly translates to martial arts chivalry). These people aren’t training for Jianghu martial art contests (江湖俠道的比武), they are training to kill for war, which does not require finesse at all. Even disregarding the lack of logic in training ordinary soldiers in martial arts (especially them teaching Taichi in the film), logistically it is simply not worth the economic and time cost of training entire regiments in martial arts only for them to be mostly killed off in battle. (Sorry, it’s difficult to explain wuxia and jianghu in a few words, but they’re super cool so please search them up if you’re interested!)

Many others on tumblr have commented on how chi itself is not the weird masculine "power" the film made it out to be, which is also very true (it's also actually very interesting so search it up if you want to!)

On Language as a Limitation

Clumsy translations of Chinese idioms and phrases that are just tragic comedy, e.g. 四兩撥千斤 being translated into “four ounces can move a thousand pounds”, which neglects the subtlety and gentle vibe of the original word choice while twisting the concept into something related to brute force or physics (but we guess this specific example is not entirely the screenwriters’ fault, since some English Taichi classes also translate it as that).

Replacing Chinese concepts and mythology directly with Western concepts such as witches, phoenixes rising from the ashes etc.

The single clumsy reference to the original “Ballad of Mulan” 雄兔腳撲朔，雌兔眼迷離；雙兔傍地走，安能辨我是雄雌？(translates to: when being held by the ears off the ground, male rabbits would have fidgeting front legs, while female rabbits close their eyes; who’s to tell male and female apart when the two rabbits are running side by side?) This line is an acknowledgement and compliment to Mulan’s intelligence and capabilities. It also challenges patriarchal beliefs of gender and women.

On Traditional Virtues (or the oversimplification of them, and a continuation of Language as a Limitation)

The film’s traditional values of 忠勇真 (translated as loyal, brave, and true in the film by using the most direct translations possible) and 孝 (translated as "devotion to family" in the film) seem to be a reference to the core values of Confucianism. We assume that the film is referencing these Confucian core values: 仁 (to be humane)、恕 (to forgive)、誠 (to be honest and sincere)、孝 (filial piety) and 尊王道 (to be loyal to the emperor). If the screenwriters were going to use traditional values, it is curious for them to choose only those three specifically, and to grossly simplify the actual values in their choice of Chinese characters (instead of using the conventional characters), then to grossly simplify them again in their English translations, and then to put them together in that order. The film also just briefly goes over the values by plainly listing them out in the form of an oath, thereby erasing the complexities of the values...

In a hilarious weibo post by 十四皮一下特别开心, they point out that the three values of 忠勇真 used in the film actually directly translate and correspond to the FBI motto of “Fidelity, Bravery, Integrity” :)

Let’s talk about ��, the fourth traditional virtue engraved in the sword gifted to Mulan by the emperor at the end of the film. Over everything else, this is the original ballad’s central moral, and what we believe the film is also trying to evoke, so the weak translation diminishes the story’s message. The animation was smart in not directly translating it and instead demonstrates what it entails through the progression of the plot. The film does the opposite and translates it as “devotion to family”, when they could have just referred to it as filial piety. Care, respect, thankfulness and giving back to one’s parents and elderly family members. While obedience and devotion are part of what the virtue teaches, it's not supposed to sound like an obligation, it’s not something ritualistic, it’s just something everyone does as a “good” human being.

(And if the director and screenwriters were trying to diminish the role and significance of filial piety in the film on purpose because they wanted Mulan to appear “stronger” and “individualistic”, then… I really have no words for how painfully insensitive that is in terms of how white feminism does not and should not apply to or be imposed on other cultures.)

And here’s our list of Things That Also Pissed Us Off that other people on tumblr have talked about already, which is why we’re mentioning them without much elaboration:

On Feminism

We get that Disney was trying to make a female empowerment movie but they really missed the mark? Even with a female director, somehow. Stepping back and ignoring the Chinese aspects of the film, as a female audience this film was equally, if not more, hurtful

Mulan is only seen as “strong” because of her extraordinarily powerful “gift” of chi that led to her being physically more powerful than the men, especially in that scene where she lugs the two buckets of water to the peak of the mountain (which is in sharp contrast to how Mulan in the animated film is strong because she’s intelligent and is able to utilise teamwork and her strengths properly, and doesn’t let her understandable disadvantage in terms of physical strength trip her up)

All female characters are one-dimensional as fuck and are mere caricatures (though to be fair, the male characters aren’t treated much better) BUT PEOPLE, MULAN IS THE MAIN CHARACTER!! Her name is literally the name of the film!!! Maybe give her some character??? And what happened to wanting to produce good Asian representation in Hollywood???

The character of the witch was slightly more complex than everyone else, which, good for her, but then the screenwriters had her killed when she could easily have not been written with that conclusion to her arc?? Seems to us like some bullshit where the witch had to be punished in a narrative sense because she “succumbed” to using her powers (which are again dubiously chi-related) for “evil”, when instead she was merely trying to achieve as much as she could for herself in a patriarchal system designed to punish her

Plus the implication of writing the sequence of the witch sacrificing herself for Mulan is that Mulan is inherently more worthy of protection because she’s more “noble”, which, again, we call bullshit. Mulan achieved (impossible) success and validation in a patriarchal system because she played by their rules of what it means to be a masculine “warrior” and excelled, while the witch is scorned and punished within the story and also in a narrative sense because she doesn’t. Is that really what it means to be noble and good???? Does that really make Mulan superior to the witch?? (Honestly this plot point might have worked if there was more complexity written into the script, but unfortunately there wasn't)

Can’t believe they just threw away what could have been a perfectly complex and compelling relationship between Mulan and the witch because of shitty writing

The way Mulan lets her hair down and dumps her armour as an indication of her female identity (which is irritating to us on so many levels, as explained by various tumblr users)

On Production

Plot and character arcs have no emotional tension; they’re super rushed and super shallow; emotional beats are not hit properly (e.g. Mulan’s loyalty and friendship towards the soldiers, built up with one line from Honghui “you can turn your back on me...but please don’t turn your back on them” kind of bullshit)

The screenwriters would not know character depth or development even if it were shoved in their face

Blatant symbolism and metaphors (e.g. the fucking phoenix, and thank fuck it doesn’t look like a western phoenix) that make the film feel very… low.

Cinematography and editing: some very beautiful and compositionally interesting shots, but the battle scenes lack tension. The jump cuts disrupt the rhythm and intensity of the fighting; in combination with the overuse of slow motion, they drag the pace of the choreography and further slow down the rhythm of the scene. Exaggerated colour toning make certain scenes more fantastical than others, resulting in a mix of realistic landscapes in some scenes and highly saturated unnatural colours in others, which draws the audience in and out of the film’s universe. This is a shame because they actually took the effort to film in real landscapes.

fig. 10 Scene in film

Special effects: lack of blood in battle scenes (which, fine, they want it to be family-friendly) and Mulan’s suddenly clean face after she returns to her female identity visually puts off the audience (and links back to the issues surrounding the visual representation of her femininity)

And here’s the extremely short list of Things That We Liked:

That first fight scene between the witch and mulan when the witch brushes mulan’s hair away from her face with her claw while restraining her because that was gay as fuck and I am but a weak bisexual!!!

Donnie Yen’s action sequences lmao (they’re not even among the better ones he’s done so everyone go watch Ip Man for actually good action sequences and choreography)

Just listening to the soundtrack itself was great, loved the Reflection variations but I was simply too distracted by the other shitty things in the film

All-asian cast (thank fuck) with impressive actors and actresses (who should not be blamed for a shitty script)

TL;DR: This film is not worth your time or money. Inferior to the animated film (which already has a few questionable aspects). If you’re somehow really interested in seeing how badly Disney butchered Chinese culture (and to a certain extent the animated film), then just pirate this film. If you want to know what happened but can’t be bothered to waste your time watching the film, read this amazing and hilarious twitter thread by @XiranJayZhao, which we found right before we posted this review, and pretty much sums up our viewing experience as well.

Disclaimer: At the end of the day we're two girls from a predominantly Chinese society who are used to Chinese period films and dramas, watching Mulan (2020), a film primarily meant for Chinese diaspora and audiences in the West, with the Chinese market in Asia being just a secondary economic opportunity for Disney. We do realise that we aren't this film's target audience, and that we're not at all experts in everything we've discussed in this review. A lot of this is just us nitpicking, and all of it is just our personal (and very emotive) opinions from watching this film. Mostly we're just disappointed that the film was advertised to be relatively realistic and culturally accurate, but… wasn't.

Sigh.

Btw please feel free to ask us for recs of actually good, actually Chinese films and shows lmao.

Finally, all the love to our beta @keekry, for her many suggestions and hilarious comments!!!

#mulan #mulan 2020 #mulan 1998 #mulan live action #chinese culture #chinese architecture #chinese clothes #chinese costumes #chinese fashion #hanfu #mulan spoilers #long post #film review #disney #as a side note i have no idea why everyone thinks it's pronounced xian lang when in fact it's xian niang

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flvcr · 5 years ago

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— ( harry styles, twenty-five, cismale, he/him ) did you see ETIENNE FLUOR walking down main street earlier? you know who i’m talking about, they’re a POTTER / HOCKEY PLAYER. everybody in town says that they’re IDEALISTIC & INTUITIVE, but have a tendency to be UNPREDICTABLE & DESTRUCTIVE too. ETIENNE has been in town for THREE years. c'mon, they’re always requesting RUNNIN’ WITH THE DEVIL BY VAN HALEN at karaoke nights. well, i’m sure you’ll see them soon! @westmerestarters

hiya! i am kt &+ underneath the read more is a LOT of info about my bb, etienne. ** insert clown emoji but make ‘em yee-haw ** if you’d like to plot you can reach me on here or at space cowboy#8536 on discord !! <33 v excited to interact with y’all and your bbs !!

𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖎𝖈𝖘

name: etienne ‘ marcel ‘ fluor.

nicknames: goes by marcel, only allowing very few people to call him etienne.

gender / pronouns : cismale / he, him.

age: twenty-five.

birthday: june 27th.

zodiac: cancer !!

orientation: pansexual / panromantic.

occupation: hockey player ( currently injured ) // potter ( for fun ) !!

languages spoken: french, english & italian.

𝖎𝖓𝖘𝖕𝖎𝖗𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

- PINTEREST - featuring his wardrobe, his home, his aesthetic, some character inspo and olive, his german shepard pup !!

- SPOTIFY PLAYLIST - what he is currently listening to !!

personality type: INFJ-T / THE ADVOCATE

moral alignment: chaotic good

style-wise: etienne is v stylish, but isn’t overly flashy by any means. he’s intuitive in the sense of what works and what doesn’t. willing to explore the latest wardrobe craze, but also just likes what he likes and likely won’t venture out unless pressed by another to do so. post coming soon for his wardrobe !!! they say that the cancer man’s clothing is selected to reflect “ sophistication over flash “ but kdgjn i’ll let ya’ll be the judge of that. he’s v much harry inspired clothing wardrobe, but also tones it down with some casual looks, especially when it comes to getting his hands dirty in creative aspects !! but can be a bit on the flashier side as well, especially w/ hockey press and what not !!

𝖇𝖆𝖈𝖐𝖌𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖉

etienne ‘ marcel ’ fluor was born in montpellier, france to two lovely parents, theodore and estelle fluor ( both born in england themselves ) . he is the youngest of his siblings, having one older brother and an older sister, all of them being roughly two years apart. at the age of eight, his family relocated to montreal, canada as a result of a promotion his mother received, which at such a young age, etienne had no qualms with, despite his siblings’ uneasiness. upon moving to a new country at a young age, etienne truly found himself via escaping into various books and movies. often attempting to write his own and would force encourage his siblings to act his skits/plays out for his parents enjoyment. he continues to be very close with his parents and siblings - recently he taught his parents how to use facetime, so catch him face timing his family on sunday nights.

growing up, etienne also enjoyed playing all types of sports ( his parents signing him up hoping that he’d make friends as a result, which he did ). when it came down to it, athletic abilities-wise, there truly wasn’t anything that he wasn’t ‘ good ’ at, and that’s simply because he’s always been such a competitive individual / as well as a perfectionist. that competitive/perfectionist energy caused him to go home and practice a skill or trick for hours in order to be able to come back the next day and whoop everyone’s asses. overall, he’s very athletic, found alternating between various sports offered not only at school, but as well as through local clubs. ultimately, his love and appreciation for hockey swayed him and soon enough it became his sole focus. due to his perfectionist tendencies, etienne is very dedicated to his craft, he will spend hours practicing specific tricks and skills in order to be the best at what he does, which transcends past hockey and into, really, every aspect of his life.

throughout highschool ; etienne was a v dedicated student. although he’s a bit reckless and loved to goof off, he was always acing classes and applying himself. he genuinely cares for others, you could’ve seen his ass volunteering at a soup kitchen with his mom on sundays and what not, as well as take part in various clubs and sports ! just SOFT and sporty things. during this time, he joined the ontario hockey league and from there was eventually scouted out and recruited to the pittsburgh penguins as a defenseman at the age of eighteen - forgoing his parents desire for him to attend a university. although he enjoyed his time with pittsburgh, he was excited when the idea of being traded came up - eager to explore a new city and immerse himself in a new area.

trigger warning - injury, dislocation ( just in case !!!! ) however, he really didn’t enjoy new york ( hehe ), so he relocated to westmere soon after his initial arrival to nyc - finding a lot of comfort in living in a less populated area. he would commute during the hockey season to nyc, which to him wasn’t very far away, so this is where he’s been residing for the last three years !! however, in the last couple of weeks while training for the upcoming season my lil bb injured himself - not to get into tooooo much detail, i’ll just leave it at shoulder dislocation / joint separation due to a hard hit !! basically he’s out for this upcoming season, already having surgery completed, he’s currently healing for the next couple of months, allowing himself to fully experience that westmere fall !!!

overall, etienne can come off as a bit reserved, and distant whether that be a result of his untrusting nature of others, or simply unfamiliarity. it takes a bit of time before he feels comfortable to share his true opinion / commentary / only doing so when he feels secure to do so. he’s not necessarily unfriendly, just a bit distant / lost in his thoughts. which varies, as with most ppl ofc, upon person to person and his level of comfortability among them. despite his often lack of conversation, he abhors an uncomfortable silence to settle and will fill it with nonsense to simply avoid the feeling altogether. so, if you ever want to catch him rambling, just making him uncomfortable dkjfngdf. he definitely approaches most things with a bit of ‘ tough love ‘ . he doesn’t mind getting into a quarrel or two if he knows its worth the outcome he’s envisioned. etienne will tell others when they are fucking up, and if they are throwing a punch as a result - catch him leaning into it, which explains his bout of reckless antics. he can come off as a know it all, when it comes to advice giving, but more so because he thinks he’s really good at analyzing others and situations they are in, not necessarily because he’s lived through them himself, he’s just rather intuitive and able to empathize quite easily with others despite his verbal admittance of it. when it comes down to this binches reckless bits, he just feels so intensely that he ends up numbing himself in the aftermath of it all ( especially bc he’s definitely not sharing those feelings with the people around him ), therefore he’s willing to put himself into harms way in order to get a bit of that - happiness / pain, it doesn’t matter to him as long as he no longer feels overwhelmed by numbness. so, if ya see him with some scrapes and stitches ~ mind ya business. but he’ll likely try to drag somebody else into it, and make it seem like it was their idea. but if he is truly comfortable with somebody, he walks a fine line of won’t stop talking, especially if it’s an interest of his, and comfortable silence.

_________________________

𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖘𝖔𝖓𝖆𝖑𝖎𝖙𝖞 & 𝖍𝖆𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖘

he is a CANCER, therefore in this essay i will..... kidding but here’s some fun cancer info i saw that applies to my bb !! at first he appears to be wistful, sarcastic ( maybe a lil crabby ) , shy, distant and mysterious. this personality remains if he isn’t completely comfortable around somebody. but overall, that’s just his facade, his ‘smokescreen’ of sorts to scare off the world from his outwards persona. underneath that layer ( makes me think of shrek metaphor with onions // don’t mind me ), BUT he’s gentle, kind and affectionate ( if you manage to make it to that level * bell dings * ) !!! overall, etienne is a sensitive soul, a bit emotional although he’d rather d*e than show that to others. likely will internalize anything that can hurt his feelings / a low blow and will do something chaotic as a result later on bc of it. very polite, and a little worldly, he is truly the epitome of old-school gentlemanly manners. chivalry coming as a second nature to him !!

that was getting ramble-y, so continuing HERE. but when it comes to romance, as per the cancer man, the concept of love is a mystery, one that etienne is trying to attain. however, his shyness and innate distrust of others make it difficult for him to allow himself to fall in love. his guard is always up when it comes to his emotions, and it’ll take a bit of prodding before he’s willing to speak up on what’s desired from him. he’s v picky when it comes to finding the “ partner of his dreams “ - but he’s def willing to throw himself into the romance of the situation, i.e. buying flowers, riding white horses, and slaying metaphorical dragons. the traditional side means that he will shower his partner with thoughtful gifts, wine and dine them in the best restaurants, and try to grant their every wish. he will take the garbage out, fix that wobbly shelf, navigate on road trips, and kill more so trap and release bugs for his partner, and most important of all he will do it all without being asked. his loyalty and keen attention to the needs and wants of his potential partner. so basically, more so willing to showcase through actions than speak on it. it’s the little things, right ??!?!?! he def cherishes not just the act of being in a relationship, but what it means to become one with another person in mind, body, and soul.

prides himself on being able to make a mean cup of coffee, likely the worst person to watch a movie with bc he knows exactly how it’s going to end after only watching five minutes of it, he has a godawful sense of direction, will walk in circles for fifteen minutes before even raising a question about it/noticing ( but he refuses to acknowledge it. )

his house, car, workspace, junk drawer, closet….you name it - it’s organized, practically sparkling. often times arranged by color, and / or style. nothing is ever out of place, and if it is - there’s trouble brewing. but, more than anything, if he’s visiting somebody’s place and it’s messy, he will spend a solid thirty minutes picking everything up before doing whatever it is that was intended.

likes : reading, flowers, handwritten notes/letters, deep cleaning, baking, working on his pottery, watching the history channel and true crime docs and playing / watching hockey !!

dislikes : artichoke, clutter, sandals ( fkjgh ), unrealistic plotlines in movies &+ burnt coffee.

habits : likely has a severe caffeine addiction, although he’s now normalized having six cups of coffee throughout his day. he’s an early riser, no matter how little the amount of sleep he’s received, he’s always the first to rise - for his early morning runs !!

strengths: creative, insightful, inspiring, convincing, determined and passionate, decisive, altruistic, intuitive !!

weaknesses: sensitive, extremely private, perfectionist, low-key always needs to have a cause / purpose, can burn out easily !!

overall : etienne truly strives to be kind, and genuinely wants for everyone to get along. treat people with kindness and the like. he has the best of intentions, but often times that can get a bit muddled with the way he goes about things due to his bit of chaotic energy / as well as his often points of getting lost in his thoughts. he won’t realize he’s been quiet for the last three hours unless it’s mentioned to him. he will do anything to lighten a dark mood, and will sacrifice / throw himself under the bus if its needed. however, he also is the type to cause the dark mood depending on the day. wahoo! his more reckless antics increase when he’s feeling a bit emotional !! but he’ll likely try and convince somebody to propose the idea so it’s not on him.

𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖔𝖒 𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖉 𝖈𝖆𝖓𝖔𝖓𝖘

he lives with sebastian !! with his commuting to nyc for the hockey season, he wanted somebody to be able to take care of his house / garden and what not, and thus, seb arrived.

he’s v into making ceramics, cups / bowls / vases / etc !! what began as a fun hobby to distract himself in the offseason became something that he truly enjoys. ( laughing about that scene in ghost BUT DKJFNG OKAY ) although he’s pretty low-key about it, you can catch him at the farmers market selling his creations !! some pictures of his work can be found on his pinterest board !!

he is a vegetarian ! he has been since his freshman year of high school and has no plans on eating seafood/meat ever again.

he loves fancy wine ~ he’s cultured.

he can play the drums !!

he collects vintage matchbooks and the stickers off of various fruits ( he puts them in a little notebook - can be found on his bookshelf ).

saves handwritten notes and letters from pals.

he loves to garden !!!! he has a specified rose shearing hat.

HE WANTS TO JOIN A BOOKCLUB PLEASE !!!!!!!! or at least have some casual moments of silence with another reading. plz and tysm.

to make things a bit simple, he has all of harry’s tattoos !! might add more along the way !! stay tuned, folks !!

𝖜𝖆𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖓𝖓𝖊𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘

i am so up for anything!! please accept this ramble of ideas thrown below. if you have any other ideas, lmk !!!! <3333 :’-) down to start from scratch and PLOT PLOT PLOT !

( 2 / 2 ) - BFFZ : the z for an added emphasis dkfjgnd. somebody who likely has a key to etienne’s house, they can enjoy one anothers company as well as the bouts of comfortable silence. you know how best friends are but kdjfngd still !! whether they are likeminded or polar opposites that just flow ~~ down for anything !! even a trio of sorts ?!

( 1 / 1 ) - RIDE OR DIE / CHAOTIC COMPANION : it would be wrong to say one is the more likely the bad influence over the other, although etienne may just be. these two find themselves bounding into, well hell, ( i guess??? ) together. playing on one anothers impulsiveness and if one ends up in the back of a police car, the other is handcuffed to them. and yet despite the length of their potential injuries, they find themselves thinking of something crazier to subject them to the next time around.

( 1 / 1 ) - GUARDIAN ANGEL / GOOD INFLUENCE : with etienne being a bit chaotic in nature, he needs somebody that is likely going to steer him clear from all the ideas that’ll bring him to the brink of disaster. he’s impulsive and in that desperate attempt to feel again, he’s very likely to bring a bit of mayhem upon himself. so while they may be worrying and attempting to talk his ideas down, he’s trying to get them to go along with his plan. it may be rare that he actually takes their advice, but when he does it seems to be for the best.

( 1 / 1 ) - PARTY FRIEND : these two know how to have a good time together. despite the amount of alcohol they are throwing back and the shenanigans they find themselves in as a result, this is a time where they also find themselves confiding in one another. if you look at their camera rolls, it’s likely they have tons of embarrassing and unflattering videos and pics of one another, in between their sob-worthy confessionals and venting/rants. these two trust one another, and although they love getting wreckT together, they find themselves discussing very raw and personal details. likely the only person etienne confides in, simply bc he’s completely plastered.

( 1 / 1 ) - SIBLING-LIKE RELATIONSHIP : these two have a love/hate relationship, very sibling like filled with pranks, competition, teasing and playful banter. however, when it comes down to it they have so much love and respect for one another. they know that no matter what happens they will always have one anothers back and be supportive of the other. truly a pure content filled relationship.

okay quick mention, ENEMY PLOTS ?!?!?!?!?!? i would live for one. i can’t imagine etienne being hardcore nasty, but i’d like to see whatever version comes out for this. so let’s get it djfngjakdfg maybe they just hold different viewpoints on the world and what not and clash, anything really !!! v open !!

( 1 / 1 ) - MENTOR - etienne needs a bit of structured or unstructured guidance, all depending on what their deemed mentor is wanting to impart on him, a bit of wisdom or slight chaos. kdjfgn he’ll take anything !!

RANDOM LITTLE IDEAS : maybe they’ve heard of one another in town, but haven’t quite met yet! or maybe they see each other around all the time, but have yet to introduce themselves to one another but low-key maybe in some online forum for the town together ?! who knows some fun things kdjnfg i AM OPEN !

ooh maybe a slowburn of sorts ?! something spicy to wreck HIS and my life with. dkfjgn we can base this off of chemistry !!! :’-)

#( & ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ . )#westmereintro

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cvrnelivs · 5 years ago

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— ( harry styles, cismale, he/him ) &. * — meet ( cornelius ‘ oliver ’ edwards ) ! ( he ) is ( twenty five ) years old and has lived in st. helens for ( two ) years . when they’re not helping the town prepare for halloween , they work as a ( baker ) . around here, they’re known to be ( idealistic ) & ( intuitive ) yet ( unpredictable ) & ( destructive ) and apparently their favorite fall activity is ( visiting the farmer’s market ) . safe to say it really wouldn’t be halloweentown without them !

hiya! i am kt &+ underneath the read more is a LOT of info about my bb, cornelius/oliver. ** insert clown emoji but make ‘em yee-haw ** if you’d like to plot you can reach me on here or at space cowboy#8536 on discord !! <33 v excited to interact with y’all and your bbs !!

( DISCLAIMER : THIS IS LONG - WOW !!! just felt a lot of muse !!! apologies !! )

𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖎𝖈𝖘

name: cornelius oliver edwards.

nicknames: ollie, ol, lee !! literally whatever - “hey, you” dkjfgn

gender: cismale. pronouns: he, him.

age: twenty-five.

birthday: june 27th.

zodiac: cancer !!

orientation: pansexual / panromantic.

occupation: baker // aspiring filmmaker.

languages spoken: english & french.

𝖎𝖓𝖘𝖕𝖎𝖗𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

- PINTEREST - featuring his wardrobe, his home, his aesthetic, some character inspo and olive, his german shepard pup !!

- SPOTIFY PLAYLIST - what oliver is currently listening to !!

personality type: INFJ-T / THE ADVOCATE

moral alignment: chaotic good

style-wise: oliver is v stylish, but isn’t overly flashy by any means. he’s intuitive in the sense of what works and what doesn’t. willing to explore the latest wardrobe craze, but also just likes what he likes and likely won’t venture out unless pressed by another to do so. post coming soon for his wardrobe !!! they say that the cancer man’s clothing is selected to reflect “ sophistication over flash “ but kdgjn i’ll let ya’ll be the judge of that. he’s v much harry inspired clothing wardrobe, but also tones it down with some casual looks, especially with being in the bakery and getting his hands dirty in creative aspects !!

𝖇𝖆𝖈𝖐𝖌𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖉

oliver was born in kent, england. he’s the youngest in his family of three, having an older brother and sister w/ two loving parents. when he was nine, his family packed up and moved to southern california, where they resided until oliver left for college on the east coast - his family trading off between living back in england and on the west coast throughout the year. upon moving to a new country at a young age, oliver truly found himself via escaping into various books and movies. often attempting to write his own and would force encourage his siblings to act his skits/plays out for his parents enjoyment. growing up, oliver also enjoyed playing all types of sports ( his parents kind of threw him in hoping he’d make friends ), but when it came down to it, athletic abilities-wise, there truly wasn’t anything that he wasn’t ‘ good ‘ at, and that’s simply because he’s always been such a competitive individual / as well as a perfectionist. that competitive/perfectionist energy caused him to go home and practice a skill or trick for hours in order to be able to come back the next day and whoop everyone’s asses. throughout highschool ; oliver was a v dedicated student. although he’s a bit reckless and loved to goof off, he was always acing classes and applying himself. he genuinely cares for others, you could’ve seen his ass volunteering at a soup kitchen with his mom on sundays and what not, as well as take part in various clubs and sports ! just SOFT and sportythings.

post-high school, oliver attended NYU double majoring in film & television and dramatic writing. despite his extensive and well received portfolio, oliver has always been a perfectionist and overcritical of his work, unwilling to share his projects with anyone until he deems them to be ~ perfect ~ himself. after graduating, he spent a year traveling, trying to find a bit of inspiration around him and taking up odd jobs to get some $$ of his own, dog walking, attempting his best at being a handy man, etc !! he moved back home to socal, and eventually made his way up to st.helen’s after he was sent a job posting for the bakery in town !! although he knows he doesn’t want to pursue a career in baking forever, he’s enjoying his time while trying to find a bit more muse for his future film&writing career.

overall, oliver can come off as a bit reserved, and distant whether that be a result of his untrusting nature of others, or simply unfamiliarity. it takes a bit of time before he feels comfortable to share his true opinion / commentary / only doing so when he feels secure to do so. he’s not necessarily unfriendly, just a bit distant / lost in his thoughts. which varies, as with most ppl ofc, upon person to person and his level of comfortability among them. despite his often lack of conversation, he abhors an uncomfortable silence to settle and will fill it with nonsense to simply avoid the feeling altogether. so, if you ever want to catch him rambling, just making him uncomfortable dkjfngdf. he definitely approaches most things with a bit of ‘ tough love ‘ . he doesn’t mind getting into a quarrel or two if he knows its worth the outcome he’s envisioned. oliver will tell others when they are fucking up, and if they are throwing a punch as a result - catch him leaning into it, which explains his bout of reckless antics. he can come off as a know it all, when it comes to advice giving, but more so because he thinks he’s really good at analyzing others and situations they are in, not necessarily because he’s lived through them himself, he’s just rather intuitive and able to empathize quite easily with others despite his verbal admittance of it. when it comes down to this binches reckless bits, he just feels so intensely that he ends up numbing himself in the aftermath of it all ( especially bc he’s definitely not sharing those feelings with the people around him ), therefore he’s willing to put himself into harms way in order to get a bit of that - happiness / pain, it doesn’t matter to him as long as he no longer feels overwhelmed by numbness. so, if ya see him with some scrapes and stitches ~ mind ya business. but he’ll likely try to drag somebody else into it, and make it seem like it was their idea. but if he is truly comfortable with somebody, he walks a fine line of won’t stop talking, especially if it’s an interest of his, and comfortable silence.

𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖘𝖔𝖓𝖆𝖑𝖎𝖙𝖞 & 𝖍𝖆𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖘

he is a CANCER, therefore in this essay i will..... kidding but here’s some fun cancer info i saw that applies to my bb !! at first he appears to be wistful, sarcastic ( maybe a lil crabby ) , shy, distant and mysterious. this personality remains if he isn’t completely comfortable around somebody. but overall, that’s just his facade, his ‘smokescreen’ of sorts to scare off the world from his outwards persona. underneath that layer ( makes me think of shrek metaphor with onions // don’t mind me ), BUT he’s gentle, kind and affectionate ( if you manage to make it to that level * bell dings * ) !!! overall, oliver is a sensitive soul, a bit emotional although he’d rather d*e than show that to others. likely will internalize anything that can hurt his feelings / a low blow and will do something chaotic as a result later on bc of it. very polite, and a little worldly, he is truly the epitome of old-school gentlemanly manners. chivalry coming as a second nature to him !!

that was getting ramble-y, so continuing HERE. but when it comes to romance, as per the cancer man, the concept of love is a mystery, one that oliver is trying to attain. however, his shyness and innate distrust of others make it difficult for him to allow himself to fall in love. his guard is always up when it comes to his emotions, and it’ll take a bit of prodding before he’s willing to speak up on what’s desired from him. he’s v picky when it comes to finding the “ partner of his dreams “ - but he’s def willing to throw himself into the romance of the situation, i.e. buying flowers, riding white horses, and slaying metaphorical dragons. the traditional side means that he will shower his partner with thoughtful gifts, wine and dine them in the best restaurants, and try to grant their every wish. he will take the garbage out, fix that wobbly shelf, navigate on road trips, and kill more so trap and release bugs for his partner, and most important of all he will do it all without being asked. his loyalty and keen attention to the needs and wants of his potential partner. so basically, more so willing to showcase through actions than speak on it. it’s the little things, right ??!?!?! he def cherishes not just the act of being in a relationship, but what it means to become one with another person in mind, body, and soul.

likes : reading, flowers, handwritten notes/letters, deep cleaning, baking, curating soundtracks for his film projects, watching the history channel and true crime docs and playing / watching hockey !!

dislikes : artichoke, clutter, sandals ( fkjgh ), unrealistic plotlines in movies &+ burnt coffee.

habits : smoking cigarettes - although he’s been meaning to quit. likely has a severe caffeine addiction, although he’s now normalized having six cups of coffee throughout his day. he’s an early riser, no matter how little the amount of sleep he’s received, he’s always the first to rise - for his early morning runs !!

strengths: creative, insightful, inspiring, convincing, determined and passionate, decisive, altruistic, intuitive !!

weaknesses: sensitive, extremely private, perfectionist, low-key always needs to have a cause / purpose, can burn out easily !!

overall : oliver truly strives to be kind, and genuinely wants for everyone to get along. treat people with kindness and the like. he has the best of intentions, but often times that can get a bit muddled with the way he goes about things due to his bit of chaotic energy / as well as his often points of getting lost in his thoughts. he won’t realize he’s been quiet for the last three hours unless it’s mentioned to him. he will do anything to lighten a dark mood, and will sacrifice / throw himself under the bus if its needed. however, he also is the type to cause the dark mood depending on the day. wahoo! his more reckless antics increase when he’s feeling a bit emotional !! but he’ll likely try and convince somebody to propose the idea so it’s not on him.

𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖔𝖒 𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖉 𝖈𝖆𝖓𝖔𝖓𝖘

in an attempt to throw himself into the town’s traditions and what not, after moving to st. helen’s oliver decided it was upon himself to put on a very spooo0ooky haunted house! so, catch him converting his home into a haunted house for the month of october !!! nothing cheesy either !! it’s more a psychological scare dkjgn with some gore elements !! EnTeR iF yOu DaRe !!!

he bounced around playing sports growing up, but favored ice hockey and field lacrosse out of them all.

HE WANTS TO JOIN A BOOKCLUB PLEASE !!!!!!!! or at least have some casual moments of silence with another reading. plz and tysm.

he is a vegetarian ! he has been since his freshman year of high school and has no plans on eating seafood/meat ever again.

he loves fancy wine ~ he’s cultured. visits seb’s winery v often !!!

he can play the drums !!

he collects vintage matchbooks and the stickers off of various fruits ( he puts them in a little notebook - can be found on his bookshelf ).

saves handwritten notes and letters from pals.

he loves to garden !!!! he has a specified rose shearing hat.

to make things a bit simple, he has all of harry’s tattoos !! might add more along the way !! stay tuned, folks !!

𝖜𝖆𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖓𝖓𝖊𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘

honestly, i am so up for anything !!! please accept this ramble of ideas thrown below. if you have any other ideas, lmk !!!! <3333 :’-)

( 2 / 2 ) - BFFZ : the z for an added emphasis dkfjgnd. somebody who likely has a key to oliver’s house, they can enjoy one anothers company as well as the bouts of comfortable silence. you know how best friends are but kdjfngd still !! whether they are likeminded or polar opposites that just flow ~~ down for anything !! even a trio of sorts ?!

( 0 / ?? ) - MUSE(S) : somebody that he often strikes inspo from for his short films and what not !! or has starred/he plans to have them star in his future compilations of sorts !! can be simply from their own ideals, their look / ~vibe~ dkfjgn // whatever !!

( 1 / 1 ) - RIDE OR DIE / CHAOTIC COMPANION : it would be wrong to say one is the more likely the bad influence over the other, although oliver may just be. these two find themselves bounding into, well hell, ( i guess??? ) together. playing on one anothers impulsiveness and if one ends up in the back of a police car, the other is handcuffed to them. and yet despite the length of their potential injuries, they find themselves thinking of something crazier to subject them to the next time around.

( 1 / 1 ) - GUARDIAN ANGEL / GOOD INFLUENCE : with ollie being a bit chaotic in nature, he needs somebody that is likely going to steer him clear from all the ideas that’ll bring him to the brink of disaster. he’s impulsive and in that desperate attempt to feel again, he’s very likely to bring a bit of mayhem upon himself. so while they may be worrying and attempting to talk his ideas down, he’s trying to get them to go along with his plan. it may be rare that he actually takes their advice, but when he does it seems to be for the best.

( 0 / 1 ) - PARTY FRIEND : these two know how to have a good time together. despite the amount of alcohol they are throwing back and the shenanigans they find themselves in as a result, this is a time where they also find themselves confiding in one another. if you look at their camera rolls, it’s likely they have tons of embarrassing and unflattering videos and pics of one another, in between their sob-worthy confessionals and venting/rants. these two trust one another, and although they love getting wreckT together, they find themselves discussing very raw and personal details. likely the only person oliver confides in, simply bc he’s completely plastered.

okay quick mention, ENEMY PLOTS ?!?!?!?!?!? i would live for one. i can’t imagine oliver being hardcore nasty, but i’d like to see whatever version comes out for this. so let’s get it djfngjakdfg maybe they just hold different viewpoints on the world and what not and clash, anything really !!! v open !!

( 1 / 1 ) - MENTOR - oliver needs a bit of structured or unstructured guidance, all depending on what their deemed mentor is wanting to impart on him, a bit of wisdom or slight chaos. kdjfgn he’ll take anything !! life advice in any and all aspects. maybe they come into the bakery, or maybe they help him with his garden. who knows, i certainly don’t know how they met, but we’ll figure it out ?!?!

ooh maybe a slowburn of sorts ?! something spicy to wreck ollie’s and my life with. dkfjgn we can base this off of chemistry !!! :’-)

#( ❛ ᴏʟɪᴠᴇʀ ᴇᴅᴡᴀʀᴅꜱ | ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ . )#htintro #excited to plot with y'all <3333 :)

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azwriting · 6 years ago

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A Tea-ffee Date (The Writer and The Photographer, Harry Holland x Reader) - Chapter Four

Hi guys, sorry for the delay on this chapter! I got a little wrapped up in one of my other fics! Anyways here's chapter four, I hope you like it! Feedback is always appreciated, and let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!

Summary: Harry and (Y/N) go on their tea/coffee date where Harry reveals he read her book and (Y/N) reveals she knew who the curly haired boy was all along.

Warning(s): Language, Reader has bad relationship with Mom, slight angst

Word Count: 2557

(Y/N) could not contain the pure happiness that was soaking into her skin, like the shining sun above. It had been since, well, since never that she had felt so content and at peace with life. Sure she had, had moments of happiness throughout her life, but it had always seemed like a dark cloud was hovering somewhere nearby. The dark cloud usually her mother…

(Y/N) shook away the thought, she was thousands of miles away, an ocean away, she would not let the woman get to her here. (Y/N) had a new job, a promising career of writing and editing ahead of her, and not to toot her own horn, but she was pretty damn proud of herself. She was living in London, beneath the warm spring sun, with her best friends and her sweet dog. Not to mention the cute boy next door with wild curls and a contagious laugh, that she was quickly becoming friends with. Who would have thought Spider-Man would be her neighbor?

Oh yeah she totally knew who Harry and his briefly mentioned brother were, (Y/N) was a massive nerd after all. All of these were reasons as to why she could not, would not, let her own mother squander her ambitions and happiness from a continent away.

It was early Saturday afternoon when Harry strolled into the nearby coffee shop in Kingston, where he had planned to meet (Y/N) for their “Tea-ffee” date as she had called it one day in passing. The Writer had a meeting in the city this morning, so she would be running a tad behind, urging Harry to just meet her at the shop. Harry took a seat in a comfortable chair at a small antique wood table in the back, waiting for his plus one.

Shifting in his seat, he could hear the crinkling sound of the folded piece of paper in his jeans pocket, the paper filled with questions, remarks, and small notes that he had after reading A Mild Case of the Crazies. The boy had read (Y/N)’s book in one night and he could not even lie, he cried, a couple times. (Y/N)’s childhood had had great moments, filled with love, happiness, laughter and excitement, but there were many parts of it that were heartbreaking, dejecting, and self-esteem squashing.

Harry now knew her favorite color, her birthday, her favorite movies, that she was in fact a big nerd, her custody agreement, the close relationship she had with her father, and the very tough one she had with her mother. It all only drew him in more, like an insect captivated by a bright light. He knew it was odd to have such intense feelings for someone he had only known for a week, had only talked to a handful of times, most of them in passing, but he could not help the natural allure he felt inside. Harry simply had to befriend her…

Two minutes before the clock struck 12:30 p.m. the front door was pulled open to reveal a woman walking in, catching Harry’s attention. She wore a black long sleeve tucked into a black and gray plaid skirt, black sheer stockings and black booties. Her red lips, sunglasses, and crossbody purse the only color against her monotone outfit. (Y/N)’s headphones were in her ears as she entered the coffee shop, Harry was pretty sure he could hear the music from his seat, eyes hidden behind her sunglasses as she scoped out the small shop.

Her head finally turned to Harry’s small corner and a large grin broke out across her face. She rushed over, pulling her headphones out of her ears and placing her sunglasses atop her head, revealing her sparkling (Y/E/C) eyes. “Hey!” She greeted warmly, Harry standing to hug her. (Y/N) pressed a quick kiss to his cheek during the hug and Harry was certain his cheeks had turned to the exact shade of red as (Y/N)’s lipstick imprint. She did not seem to notice and if she did, she did not mention it. “Did you order yet?” (Y/N) questioned pointing behind her to the front counter.

Harry shook his head moving towards the line, “No, I was waiting for you.”

(Y/N) smiled at that following suit, “And they say chivalry is dead!”

After ordering their drinks and Harry insisting to pay, the two sat back down with their drinks in hand, tea for Harry and an iced coffee for (Y/N). “So…” (Y/N) giggled taking a sip of her drink.

“So…” Harry mirrored smiling at the girl across from him.

“Where do you want to start?” Harry pondered for a moment, taking a sip of his tea, the liquid warming his insides, it may be early May but the cooler temperatures were still sticking in East London.

“Oh, I know, I read your book!” (Y/N)’s eyes bugged out, choking on her current sip of coffee.

“You did?!”

Harry laughed nodding as he retrieved the folded piece of paper from his pocket, “And I have some questions!” He waved the piece of paper in front of (Y/N), who still seemed to be in shock. She could not process the fact that Harry Holland had read HER book! Harry unfolded the piece of paper, revealing both sides to be filled with tiny scrawls of notes, questions, etc.

“Oh dear god!” Harry flushed, mildly embarrassed, he could not help but want to address certain aspects of the book, and it was not often where you could do so openly with the actual author. “How about we make a deal?” Harry’s eyebrow rose at that, “For every question you ask me, I ask one in return?”

A soft innocent smirk spread across (Y/N)’s red lips and it had Harry instantly nodding, unsure of what he was getting himself into, but he reminded himself that this is what he signed up for.

“Deal.” (Y/N) bit her lip, gesturing with a manicured finger for him to start.

Clearing his throat Harry mindlessly read off his first question, “Is it true your mum and you haven’t spoken since the book? Even after the epilogue?” Harry could admit the book illustrated (Y/N)’s mother to be an interesting person, one who yes, loved her children, but had the wrong way of showing it.

Throughout the book, throughout the different years and milestones (Y/N) covered in her early years of life, her mother had always seemed to be a looming presence, one that had and Harry would quote the book, ‘...dragged me down into a deep abyss of self doubt and depression. One that no matter how hard I tried to climb out of, her dark tentacles would pull me back down into her suffocating grasp.’

The line had resonated with Harry as the boy could not imagine his mother doing that to him, instead she had always pushed the boys to spread their wings not drown. Yet, after an entire 369 pages of (Y/N)’s life, many chapters delving into her increasingly tough relationship with her mother, the Epilogue had been dedicated to the woman. (Y/N) had expressed her understanding of her tough childhood, of their constant arguments, and the hurtful words. She wrote how she understood her mother’s own demons had weighed her down, causing problems in their bond and how her mother could not accept responsibility for tarnishing that precious bond, instead choosing to blame her own daughter and ex-husband. (Y/N) wrote how after writing the past 360 or so pages, she had finally greeted acceptance as an old friend, and accepted that these were parts of her past. And on the final page of the heart wrenching book in big bold lettering three words were written that sent the world into a spiral of emotions.

‘I Forgive You.’

It was heavy, the book was heavy, touching upon things not many other books chose to discuss, the relationship between a child and a mentally ill parent.

(Y/N) let out a loud huff of air, “Starting off with the hot and heavy huh?”

Harry’s eyes widened at that, how foolish of him to ask that question first or even at all, “I-I’m so sorry, you don’t need t-to answer!” (Y/N) shook her head, a small smile on her face reassuring him.

“No no, I don’t mind. Trust me I’ve dished plenty to interviewers and even if I hadn’t, I wouldn’t mind telling you.” (Y/N) spoke calmly making Harry feel better. “No we haven’t talked really since the release of the book, almost two years ago now, but honestly she hasn’t even read the book. I believe she only read the first few chapters which I’ll admit don’t paint her in the prettiest light, but she never finished reading it.” (Y/N) shrugged, trying to hide the small frown on her features. Harry frowned with her, his sympathy going to the girl, he could not imagine his own mother acting in such a way.

Clearing her throat, (Y/N) dismissed her sorrows and turned back to Harry, a smile returning to her face. “My turn,” She pretended to ponder for a moment tapping her finger against her chin, “What’s it like having three brothers?”

Harry groaned, “A chaotic mess honestly!” He had answered so quickly, his mind had not even fully registered her question. “Wait!” His eyes widened and (Y/N) only smirked in return. “How do you know I have three brothers? I only mentioned one!” (Y/N) giggled lifting her shoulders in a simple ‘you caught me’ motion.

“C’mon Harry! You read my book! I talk in extensive detail about my love for the Marvel movies! Hell, I was going to go to Film school so I could work for Disney before the whole book thing!” Film School? Ah yes he did remember reading about that in her book, another reason he was drawn to the girl.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Harry questioned, a small part of him beginning to doubt (Y/N)’s intentions with him, was she here to learn about Harry or his infamous heartthrob brother Tom?

“I’m sorry would you prefer this,” (Y/N) paused inhaling sharply, “OMG Harry Holland is that you???” Her voice rose up an octave while still trying to be quiet in the store as to not draw any unwanted attention.

Harry snorted, no he guessed he did not want that, but his inner doubt was still plaguing his thoughts, “So you’re a Spider-Man fan then?”

(Y/N) nodded immediately, “Oh yeah love him, more of a Cap girl though.” Harry sighed a little, perhaps this was only an opportunity to meet famous actors, not that he thought so lowly of (Y/N), but he was just used to people cozying up to him for their own advantages. (Y/N)’s eyes narrowed watching him as if she was reading his thoughts, “I love Spider-Man don’t get me wrong, but I kinda have a thing for curly haired redheads.” She smirked at him as Harry’s face instantaneously burned bright red, her words squashing his doubts.

“H-hey I’m not a redhead!” Harry defended, eliciting a loud laugh from (Y/N), the girl’s eyes widening in disbelief.

“Oh Oh Oh you so are!”

The cool spring breeze whipped past the two as they walked down the sidewalk of Kingston, enjoying the sun and blossoming trees. “So you have a little brother?” Harry questioned, lightly bumping his shoulder into (Y/N). Her covered eyes looked over to him, a smile always on her lips, Harry never wanted her to stop smiling at him.

“Yes I do, my pride and joy that goof!” (Y/N) laughed lightly, before looking off into the distance recalling something. Harry knew (Y/N) and her younger half brother had a close relationship, he had read all about it. Her Mother and Stepfather had always been working in their youth, leading to (Y/N) to practically raise the boy herself. An 11 year old girl becoming a parent to a 3 year old boy, it was absurd.

Harry could only imagine the strain their mother had caused on their relationship as well, the book had described how she hated the motherly role (Y/N) had taken on for her brother.

“He’s coming to visit during the summer, hopefully you can meet him!” (Y/N) spoke, returning to look at Harry, who nodded in agreement. The rest of the walk was quiet, the two mirroring flats coming into view. The two stopped in front of (Y/N)’s stairs, both fiddling with their feet as looked at each other, obviously hesitant to depart.

The pair were unsure where this was leading; were they meant to be friends or something more? Neither could really tell, but the significant pull and attraction between the two was noticeable and unfightable, not that either one of them wanted to fight it.

“Do you… do you want to come in?” (Y/N) asked, a nervous smile on her face. Harry grinned in return, his face was starting to hurt from all the smiling.

“I’d like that.” With that, (Y/N) quickly turned on her heel and rushed up the steps to unlock the dark blue door, Harry following.

“Honey I’m home!” (Y/N) shouted as she hung up her red crossbody onto one of many white hooks perched on the side wall. The flat was similar to Tom’s but this one appeared a tad bigger with a different layout and color scheme. Not to mention it looked much cleaner and more styled than Tom’s.

“No one cares!” A voice called back and (Y/N) scoffed lightly as she removed her shoes and placed them in a shoe basket beneath the hooks. (Y/N)’s stocking covered feet shuffled forward on the dark wood floor as she bent down to greet the excited black lab who came bounding in, while Harry removed his shoes as well.

“How was your date with the cute neighbor?” Another voice called making (Y/N) cough loudly as she walked into the kitchen on the left.

“Um it went well, considering…” (Y/N) trailed off as Harry entered the kitchen behind her, Bella licking his palm, and the two twin girls surrounding the kitchen island going bugged eyed. “Harry this is Hayley,” (Y/N) pointed to the blonde girl standing behind the island, “and Madison”, she pointed to the brunette girl sitting on one of the bar stools at the island. “Guys this is Harry.” Short awkward waves were given along with small hello’s, (Y/N) only giggling as she moved to wash her hands at the large kitchen sink behind Hayley.

“Idiot” Madison murmured under her breath, regarding Hayley’s remark about the cute neighbor, who happened to be in the townhouse as well.

“God you’re so fucking annoying!” Hayley groaned back at her twin, which only earned her a huff in return.

“Well you’re fucking ugly!” (Y/N)’s head dropped in the background as she snickered to herself and Harry had to hide his small laugh into the palm of his hand. The two twins were identical, besides their hair color, which only meant Madison was insulting herself.

“Ok then!” (Y/N) laughed drying her hands on a blue kitchen towel, “I’m going to show Harry around. You two, keep doing whatever you are doing!” (Y/N) practically pushed Harry back down the front hall towards the stairs, unbeknownst to the eyes trailing after them.

Madison leaned back in the black iron chair and Hayley leaned over to the kitchen island, the two watching their best friend and the neighbor ascend the stairs, both of them staring at each other fondly.

“This oughta be interesting.”

Taglist:

@aloneinherroom

@ineedabifriend

#harry holland x reader #Harry Holland #harry holland imagine #harry holland x you #Harry holland x y/n

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riblds-blog · 6 years ago

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❛ ｡ ❄️ ﾟ 𝗱𝗶𝗱 𝗶 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝗮𝘆 the steam that rolls off of a half - drunk cup of earl grey, knitted sweaters and a perpetual air of neatness & order, an abandoned manuscript that haunts the backburner of a tired mind, honeyed curls and glances alike, & the gentle crackling of a fire behind you ? then you must be talking about canterbury, i’d recognise them anywhere. i’ve heard that the twenty - nine year old bestselling author is an aquarius and honestly, i see it. they’re known for being defeatist and monastic, but their demiurgic and clement tendencies make up for it. they’ve been staying at du lac for one week and i think that their real name is 𝗷𝗮𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗿 𝗵𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗲, but don’t spill.

jasper simon hesse is born to a small but loving family in canterbury, england on a particularly cold, blustery evening ; ominous thunder cracks overhead the minute he takes his first discordant, screamed breath and given the way his life unfolds, it all feels very poetic and fitting. born to an english teacher who writes terrible articles for cheap magazines and a french teacher, language flows in his blood the minute he’s born. by the age of six, his mother’s taught him to speak french and english side - by - side and he’s reading whatever he can get his grubby little hands on. his parents don’t tend to believe in censorship in the home, so jasper grows up watching and reading whatever takes his interest --- children’s movies don’t do it quite the same as creature features do. it’s in his early childhood that a lifelong affair with horror and the supernatural is born, and his parents are all too willing to facilitate it.

he’s a quiet kid, polite and charming and too bright for his own good. he’s the kid that sits in the corner of the classroom with a book that he’s entirely too young for whilst the rest of his classmates are fooling around on the playground. school reports often wax poetic about his creativity, his endless kindness, his chivalry ; they also warn that he errs on antisocial and should be skinning his knees and chasing peers around rather than poring over a paperback he stole from his mother’s collection. once again, his parents don’t really mind --- their nonchalance becomes a recurring thread when he unravels his childhood like needlework he’s not pleased with.

( his parents’ complete lack of regard stems from their own issues --- his mother has been suffering with postnatal depression since jasper’s birth, has slumped into a shell of the vivacious human she once was and now that he’s growing up she cannot continue to try for him anymore. his parents get a divorce shortly after jasper’s tenth birthday, and his father packs him off to go live in london with him. he writes to his mother occasionally within the times he doesn’t see her, but his letters go mostly unanswered. )

london is, quite possibly, the best thing that could happen to jasper. his father works long hours but slips endless pocket money under jasper’s pillow, a note attached that tells him to go blow it on museum tickets. he spends countless hours wandering around the british museum, the v&a, wide-eyed and rosy-cheeked and in love with the world around him. it’s in the cafe at the v&a that he scratches out his first short story at twelve. it’s rough, and it’s hardly his best work, but he’s pleased enough with it to show his father. his father ( and really, i can’t talk enough about how good of a dad daniel hesse is but more on that later ) crows praise for two days, reads it out to his classroom, acts like jasper’s written a new york times bestseller instead of a monster story with too many adjectives on cheap paper he stole from his dad’s office.

he catches the writing bug hard. all throughout what remains of high school he puts everything he has into developing his writing, and by the time he graduates he’s gotten himself published in a handful of moderately - respected magazines. shortly after graduation he applies for a bachelor of english language and literature at oxford university and gets in. it’s here that magic truly happens ; between attending classes and acing them like it’s absolutely nothing, jasper starts working on his first manuscript. halfway through his second year, he finishes it and submits it for publishing, and --- he’s not expecting the response that it gets.

practically overnight, jasper hesse becomes one of the hottest new horror authors on the market. reviews of his first novel are glowing, praising just about everything and fuck, if the whole thing isn’t infectious. he’s twenty years old, with a bestselling novel and more money than he knows what do with, and it’s glorious. work starts immediately on his follow-up, and the rest, they say, is history.

fast forward about nine years, and he’s one of the most well - respected authors within the horror genre. with a bibliography that spans magazines, scholarly journals, novels and a film adaptation that he’s still moonstruck about, he’s a success story that most dream of. he buys his mother a house in barcelona, and his father one in the alps -- he visits them both regularly, and tries not to wince when they ask when he’s going to bring a nice girl home and start a family. he’s working on something new, but nine years’ worth of churning out bestsellers has taken a toll

his agent, a middle - aged woman who constantly looks concerned about the state of unruly curls and bags under eyes, suggests a holiday and books him in for a few months at the du lac, and he’s too tired to argue with her.

so, that’s how he’s ended up at du lac ! he’s trying to work on a new novel, trying to relax, etc etc etc

this is too long anyways i’m gna shut up now but i LOVE him

#lac:intro #depression tw #ˋ ⋅ ˚ ◟ ♡ : hesse ‚ jasper simon . ︵ intro .

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dent-de-leon · 6 years ago

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Hey Leo! Sorry for the random questions but do you recommend The Dragon Prince? Is it about the dragons or are they like background lore or something? Thanks!

Short answer: hell yeah,, it’s so much fun!! Give it a try if you love fantasy adventure stuff. Long answer:

DRAGONS ARE MY FAVORITE THING EVER SO I WILL TELL YOU THAT I ABSOLUTELY CAME CAUSE I HEARD “DRAGON” AND “PRINCE” AND “DRAGON PRINCE” AND THAT SEEMED TO SUIT MY VERY SPECIFIC INTERESTS,,, there’s a lot of lore and they seem to be more or less the ruling forces of Xadia, the land of magic and elves. But they’re definitely not just a backdrop piece, they’re major players! Sadly we don’t get to see as much dragon action in the first season, but the entire focus of the main trio is to protect a dragon that’s a royal heir, the eponymous “Dragon Prince.”

And so,, bit of a spoiler, but you DO get to actually meet the Dragon Prince in the series,, they hatch right before season 2 and become one of the traveling companions of the main trio. They’re the cutest little baby dragon!! Again, I’m sorry for the spoiler, but if I say like…there’s a dragon companion Eventually and you know that episode 1 introduces a dragon egg, like…it’s kinda hard to talk about without giving away, and DP certainly didn’t shy away from advertising Baby Dragon in all the promo stuff for season 2 so I figure you’ll run into it anyway. And we see glimpses of other dragons as the episodes go by, and they all exude this sense of absolute awe and power. So if you came for the dragons,, there will!! Be!! Dragons!!

But what else is at the forefront–even more so than the dragons? One of my other favorite things in all of fantasy ever. ELVES,, and lots of them!! All elves–and indeed, all the magical creatures native to Xadia–are born with an innate connection to something called an arcanum, which is a kind of really cool elemental magic!! The writers of Dragon Prince are some of the people that splintered off from the Avatar series after Last Airbender (so they were uninvolved with Korra, but part of the original series). And you can definitely see that in the influence of a lot of the lore and world building.

Each race of elves having their own affinity for a particular arcanum is definitely going to be reminescent of the whole bender thing. These arcanum are also known as “Primal Sources,” because they’re kind of this mystical, primordial energy that controls the natural forces of the universe. So you have:

Moon Arcanum (Moonshadow Elves: value loyalty and their oaths above all else, honorable, mystical, withdrawn, spiritual, duplicitous, illusionists, assassins, conditioned to never show fear)

Sun (Sunfire Elves: masters of the forge, unparalleled craftsmanship in their weapon and armor smithing, destructive, nurturing, charismatic, passionate, can invoke either a “rage” based state to rampage with increased strength and speed, or harness their “light” in order to heal)

Sky (Skywing Elves: Keen minded, clever, value their freedom and autonomy above all else, gifted with flight)

Earth (Earthblood Elves: Patient, steadfast, stubborn, introspective, inquisitive, very in-tune with the balance of the natural world, value harmony and discovery)

Ocean (don’t know what these elves are called still,, rip,,, but: Peaceful, empathetic, deeply connected to others, forge intimate bonds, adaptable, versatile)

Star (Startouch Elves: very rare, elusive, have a vast concept of time and space as seen through the lens of infinite cosmos, gifted in divination, posses ancient magic and potential secrets of the universe)

The main conflict of the show is actually between the humans and the elves. They used to all live together, but then humans betrayed the others through the creation of dark magic, a sort of “cheat” since humans aren’t born naturally connected to any of the Primal Sources. Since they’re cut off from the arcanum, they saw their only viable means of practicing magic as sacrificing other magical beings to draw from their life force. This can be anything from crushing bugs to ritual use of phoenix feathers, and even killing dragons. So that’s how you get the alleged “sixth arcanum,” Dark Magic. And honestly, lots of Magical Creatures weren’t a Big Fan of that. Humans eventually went to war with the elves and dragons, and!! Yes!! They lost. And got driven out of Xadia.

Dragon Prince takes place sometime later, and is essentially about heightening tensions between humans and elves, and likely, the very inevitable impending war. There are numerous human kingdoms, each with their own politics, as well as everything we’ve yet to discover about the interrelationships between differing arcanum elves. The series features two human princes trying to navigate their role in society and expectations for the future alongside the emerging threat of war and disconcerting realization that Xadia isn’t quite as sinister as they thought. There’s also their new friend Rayla, a Moonshadow Elf and trained assassin–who has decided to grudgingly open up her heart, and maybe give humanity a chance (I love her). You also have the obligatory Dark Magic sorcerer with his own agenda and secrets. Not to mention his jock son and dark magic daughter, who are honestly both so quirky, endearing, complex, and can just steal the show.

I also have to mention General Amaya!! She’s the general of one of the human kingdom armies, and she’s also mute. All her soldiers communicate with her in sign language (and it’s actually correctly animated ASL!!). Everything about the way this character was brought to life was so amazing and, not knowing anything about her beforehand, I was so pleasantly surprised by her strength, charm, chivalry–she’s amazing. And it’s clear that considerable research and effort went into representation here.

Other reasons to watch include one of my personal favorites,, Hot Elves,, you’ve got both Runaan and Aaravos here and they’re all I can focus on whenever they’re onscreen. They both own my heart and soul and they’re 100% perfect I’m very thankful I can always look forward to them,,

Unfortunately, I can talk about how much I like Dragon Prince all I want, but I also have to definitely mention there’s a relationship between two queer characters in a flashback of season 2, and they’re both killed off soon after their introduction. That left a bit of a bad taste in my mouth. I’ve seen people “compare” it to Voltron, try to claim it did things “better,” but that’s honestly all ridiculous. Not to mention, VLD’s LGBT rep was always meant to be Shiro, and he was still around, whereas TDP introduced two minor LGBT characters and then proceeded to kill off their only LGBT characters an episode later. This isn’t me trying to complain or start a fight or anything, but it’s a matter that raises valid concerns and was understandably upsetting for people, so I feel like it’s fair to warn anyone going into it.

As a whole, I do love TDP though. Really, the fun here is in the characters and charm of the series. It’s also really not a show that takes itself too seriously, which is kinda nice. A lot of people have said it was too childish for them, which I can understand, but the whole thing feels very storybook and endearing to me. There’s also certainly layers of nuance there, with political games, duplicitous motivations, usurping kings, self-sacrifice, betrayal, the grieving process, how far you’d go for someone you love–I think there’s definitely some substance to it. I’d recommend that most people at least give it a chance to see if it’s their thing. And if you do, I hope you enjoy it

#tdp #the dragon prince

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vulturereyy · 2 years ago

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A bug’s first memory, if it could reach so far within itself to retrieve such, was often one of security. One that involved being nestled within the egg’s safe shell, now becoming a tight squeeze the closer they were to hatching. The gentle press of the shell was often a bug’s first embrace. A bug’s first idea of what would become of its soft body upon the first molt. A bug’s first carapace. The cold, confining press of a stone coffin was none of these things.

My very FIRST fanfiction ever, of course featuring my main main HEGEMOL!!! I really hope I can keep this momentum going, I've got a great path in store for my dear knight, including giving him some much needed friends :)

Post-ending journey fic where Hegemol (And friends) road trip toward closure.

Aiming to update weekly to bi-weekly!

(And a huge thank you to @grollow and @bettsplendens for helping me with in-depth editing, and @dragons-age , @ruthlesslistener , @astorichan, and Spike for being my first readers pre-posting <3)

#Hollow knight #hollow knight fanfiction #fanfiction #mighty hegemol #hk hegemol #nailmaster mato #hk mato #lurimol #<- yall already know i gotta include that #wont be for a while though #bretta will also be a main character though i feel bad tagging her bc she's not in it yet #there's gonna be some fucked up shit i promise #lots of emotion #but also healing. so much healing #baby's first fanfic #is it a fix-it fic if the shit remains fucked up but the characters get to appropriately react to it #the world may never know

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chivalry-2-hack-4h · 3 years ago

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Chivalry 2 - Wikipedia

💾 ►►► DOWNLOAD FILE 🔥🔥🔥 Chivalry 2 is the much-awaited successor to the original Chivalry that was released in The multiplayer hack and slash game is developed by Torn Banner Studios and published by Tripwire Interactive. Based on Unreal Engine 4, the game was received positively by both players and critiques. However, as time passed by, bugs and glitches surfaced that sometimes made the game unplayable. While some complained that the in-game Archers were overpowered , others said they could not queue up with friends since the invite system was not working. Now, many are reporting several issues with the game. Some Chivalry 2 players say they are getting anti-cheat authentication warnings and are getting kicked in the middle of the game. However, the issue only seems to affect console users right now. Has anybody else received this message and is it what I think it is, an accusation of cheating? Was playing a march on PS4 and it was a really good match but I was chasing someone down and attacking them and got kicked and got that message. Players are reporting that the update has reset all their stats like number of matches played, won, and their KDA. Is this intended and done to everyone else? Or something thats happened unintentionally? Had this happened to anyone else? Last but not the least, it looks like Chivalry 2 is crashing on the PlayStation 5. The bug has frustrated many and made the game unplayable. My ping is usually between 10 and 20 but the server side lag is so bad I cant judge when to counter or parry a swing and I also get hit by people that are mid-swing or just starting to swing there weapons. Was enjoying the game until the latest patch. At random the game crashes and asks if I want to send a report. Is anyone else experiencing this? I play on PS5 Source. All the aforementioned issues including have surfaced after the recent Fight Knight Post-Launch update. Fortunately, the developers have acknowledged all the issues and said they are trying to find fixes for the same. Fight Knight Post-Launch Update: There have been a few critical and complex issues that we have run up against and we want to let the community know that we are aware of these issues and are in the process of developing solutions to address them. We hope Torn Banner Studios fix the Chivalry 2 issues as soon as possible so players can start playing the game once again. When they do, we will update this article so make sure you keep an eye out on this space. However, some OOM crashes may still occur. Note : We have more such stories in our dedicated Gaming Section so be sure to follow them as well. Featured image source: Chivalry 2. Want to know more about us? Head here. Previous article. Next article. My fascination with technology and computers goes back to the days of Windows XP. Since then, I have been tinkering with OS, mobile phones, and other things. When I am not working on anything, you will find me enjoying video games on some Discord server. Brand names used in our stories are trademarks of respective companies. New updates are being added at the bottom of this story……. Original story published on October 29, follows: Chivalry 2 is the much-awaited successor to the original Chivalry that was released in Source Was playing a march on PS4 and it was a really good match but I was chasing someone down and attacking them and got kicked and got that message. Source My ping is usually between 10 and 20 but the server side lag is so bad I cant judge when to counter or parry a swing and I also get hit by people that are mid-swing or just starting to swing there weapons. Source We hope Torn Banner Studios fix the Chivalry 2 issues as soon as possible so players can start playing the game once again. Source Note : We have more such stories in our dedicated Gaming Section so be sure to follow them as well. Tags : Chivalry 2 , Chivalry 2 anti cheat authentication warning , Chivalry 2 crashing on PS5 , Chivalry 2 invisible bots , Chivalry 2 stats resetting. Share :. Next article Several Google News publishers missing featured images on some articles, issue escalated. Facebook Twitter Feed.

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ilosttrackofthings · 8 years ago

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Biospecialist please and thank you "things you said when you were drunk"

“No, thank you,”Jemma says for the second time. The first time she was polite, ifstern. This time she’s very nearly rude and her fingers are itchingto grab her ICER. Unfortunately her purse has fallen beneath thetable.

“Come on, baby,”slurs the slobbering man who’s been hitting on her for the lastquarter hour. He fills in the gaps between them and though it sickensher to think he’ll follow her down, she considers lowering herself toreach for the purse. “Can’t wear a dress like that and not give aguy a peak, can you?”

“I most certainlycan,” she says. Nearly the moment the words are out of her mouth,she’s forced deeper into the booth seat and her assailant is sentsideways by a dark blur.

A few onlookersyell encouragements, but all keep their distance as the fight soundsto be mostly a lot of rolling around and punching. Someone nearbylets out a long oooo,spurring Jemma to swallow her shock. She eases around the edge of thebooth in time to see a flash of metal disappear into the slobberingdrunk’s throat. He stops moving a moment later. The victorrises from the floor and lets out a huff before turning to face her.The squirming disgust that set every inch of her skin crawlingfreezes to ice.

“Simmons,” Wardsays conversationally. He grabs a fresh beer from a passing drunk—whodoesn’t dare argue—and falls into the seat across from her. “Whatbrings you here? Spying for Coulson?”

She’s not,incidentally, but the odds of her choosing to drown her sorrows inthe same bar as Ward must be infinitesimal. She wouldn’t evenbelieve her own denial.

“Why did you dothat?” she asks instead.

He shrugs oneshoulder. On the table, he’s fiddling with the beer in a way thatseems terribly unlike him. “He was bugging you.”

“Why should thatmatter?”

He narrows his eyesat her, his expression going terrifyingly critical. “Because we’refriends.”

Right.That.

Hesaid the same during his very short stay in the Playground, betweenreturning with Coulson and heading off to the Arctic with the others.(Before he tortured Bobbi forthe better part of two days.)

Hetilts his head oddly. “Are you all right? Did he hurt you?” Hethrows a glare off to the side as though considering beating thedead man for good measure.

“No,I’m fine.” Aside from the very poor decision making skills she’sexhibited recently. What was she thinking coming into a place likethis?

Sheknows exactly what she was thinking: that this dingy bar with itsbars on the windows and smell of vomit on the sidewalk outside is thelast place within walking distance of the very nice, very poshrestaurant two blocks away that Fitz will expect her to have run offto.

It’snot that it was a baddinner. It could hardly be that with good food and good company. It’sjust that it was a bad date.She kept forgetting they were even on one and then Fitz would reachacross the table for her hand or the waiter would smile knowinglybetween them and she’d remember.

Sowhen she went to the loo and saw the alley door right there, she’safraid she did something unforgivable. (She tries not to think what arelief that is, that Fitz certainly won’t be able to look past herditching him.)

“Ohbloody hell,” she mutters.

Wardsits forward. “What? What’d he do?”

“Nothim,” she says sharply, feeling uncharitably angry at Ward forsaving her. “Fitz. He’s going to think you kidnapped me.” Andthen there won’t be anything to forgive. He’ll ask for anotherdate and it will go even worse than this one but she won’t be able to run off again, will she?

Ward’sface scrunches up in a way that once would’ve made Jemma’s heartswoop. (Perhaps it still does a little.) “Why would he think that?”

Shegestures around them at the dimly lit bar, the very dangerous lookingdrunks (really, what was she thinking coming in here?), the corpse onthe floor. “Because I’m herewith you instead of onour date.”

“Wait.”He points between her and said corpse. “Did that guy kidnap you?”

Shesighs, sinking down into her seat. Her foot nudges her purse. She’dforgotten about it. A madman who very recently attempted to kill oneof her friends is sitting two feet away and she forgot about herpurse and the weapon inside. She might have had too much wine withdinner.

“No,he did not kidnap me,” she says, figuring it’s too much work tolie when she’s so obviously out of sorts. Not that it’s likely towork on Ward anyway. She may be able to convince Fitz she’s havinga lovely time but the day she can pull one over on Ward is the dayhell freezes over. “I ran out on dinner.”

“Oh,Simmons.”Ward—coldblooded killer, traitor, formeragent of Hydra—sounds disappointed in her behavior. She reallycan’t blame him.

Sheconsiders stealing his pilfered beer and drinking it down, it mightmake her feel better.

“Boss?”A tall, bald man with some nasty stitching along his cheek looms overthem. Ward doesn’t seem bothered.

“Yeah?”he asks, smacking his lips in a way which finally alerts her to theobvious: Ward is even more drunk than she is. No wonder he’s beenso friendly.

“Wegot that-” the man’s eyes cut to her- “shipment you wanted.”

“Right.Gotta take care of this,” Ward says. But he doesn’t move to go.He frowns for a few seconds before pointing to her. “Watch her.Make sure nobody else bothers her.”

Thebald man looks as confused as Jemma. But he says a dutiful, “Yes,sir.”

WhenWard does make to stand, he stops with a hiss of pain.

“Sir!”

“Sonofabitchpulled a knife on me,” Ward says. Now that he’s lifting his arm,Jemma can see the shine of blood clinging to his shirt.

“Oh,honestly,” she snaps, “can’t you go five minutes withoutinjuring yourself?” She does reach for her purse now, as she has anemergency med kit inside. It isn’t much, not nearly what she wouldtake on a real mission, but between it and all the alcohol in theroom it has everything she’ll need to see to this.

“It’sokay,” Ward says to his associate’s questioning look when shemoves to examine him. To her he says, “How about we move this tothe back?”

Sheagrees before she can consider the wisdom of following Ward into aneven more isolated area.

(Ifshe ever considers the wisdom of tending to the manwho nearly killed Bobbi only last week, she justifies it by remindingherself he was injured protecting her.)

Asshe expected, once she has him seated on a table with his shirt off,he has a truly impressive puncture wound. Only his ribs have savedhim from grave injury.

“You’reimpossible,” she murmurs while she stitches the cut.

He smiles like a little boy proud of bringing home a great, fattoad.

“Andwhat will I find under there?” she asks, nodding to the gauze tapedto his forearm. “Another ill-gotten injury?”

“This,”Ward says while pointing to his side, “is from an act of chivalry.But this one’s just from Fitz.”

“Fitz?”It’s a lucky thing it took only three stitches to seal him up,otherwise she might do him further harm in her shock. “What doesFitz have to do with anything?” Other than being the entire reasonshe’s here.

“Hetried to blow me up.” Ward catches her expression and his facefalls into something approaching apology. “Oh. He didn’t tellyou? He put an explosive in my pack in the Arctic. Nearly fucked thewhole mission up.”

No.No, that isn’t right at all. Fitzwould never…

Buthe barely spoke to her after returning from the mission. And theexplosion featured in the reports. Though it was blamed on Ward, noone had any idea how he’d managed to get his hands on a bombwithout being noticed.

Oh,Fitz.

Roughfingers brush through her hair, moving a few stray strands behind herear. Ward is staring at her intently. Each beat of her heart feelslike a drum, the vibrations rolling through her.

“Sothat whole thing about Fitz thinking I kidnapped you?” he asks. Hehisses apologetically. “I’m afraid he won’t be entirely wrong.”

#biospecialist #my fic #*td #ask fic #biospec fic #anonymous

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whatshappeningcowboy · 8 years ago

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Fallout 4 OC Sheet by @madddraws, thank you for making this!

Name: Chivalry ‘Chiv’ Wolfgang Arroyo Nickname: Chiv (pronounced ‘shiv,’ like the homemade weapon). Age: 24 (234) Height: 5’11’’ Weight: 160lbs S.P.E.C.I.A.L: S5 P3 E4 C7 I4 A3 L2 (starting stats). Eyes: Dark grey. Hair: Shaved sides, messy slicked back top, jet black. Body Type: Average build, a little on the smaller side. Status Pre-War: Petty criminal wanted by police for a serious crime (that he didn’t commit); flees to Massachusetts and works as an off-the-books laborer for a short period before the bombs drop. Status Currently: Mercenary. Relationship Status: In pretty deep with MacCready. Spouse: Never married. Sexuality: Gay Gender: Male Ethnicity: Caucasian American, some Mexican blood. Family: Military father, seamstress mother; estranged from both before the War. Taken in by his court-assigned lawyer Nora Kennedy and her husband Nate after the law catches up to him in Massachusetts. This ends...badly. Dogmeat, Junkyard (dog) and MacCready make up his family post-War. Languages: English Scars: (from Pre-War) Large burn scar on his lower back/hip from the initial bomb blast, jagged stab scar with stitch marks on his right thigh from an old wound as a teen. Post-War, he has fairly extensive facial scarring from a run-in with a territorial deathclaw pair in the Glowing Sea. He also ends up with various scars on his neck, arms and torso as time goes on. Physical traits: His eyes are his most prominent feature; big, dark and charming. Almost always has a black eye from some scrape or another. Broke his wrist as a kid which healed badly so struggles to hold up a sniper rifle for extended periods of time. Clothing: Nuka World t-shirt and jeans, or a leather jacket and jeans. Favors a combat armor chest-piece for trickier situations. Wears a strip of MacCready’s old Gunner bandana around his wrist under his pip-boy later in the game. Fashion style/lifestyle: Confirmed Bachelor™; messy as fuck, lazy. Skills: Stellar engineer. The boy can make anything out of wasteland junk. Really good at crafting settlements and houses using what’s already there as a starting point; in another life he’d have made an excellent architect. Has a good heart. Very loyal. Weaknesses: Mouth often gets him into trouble. Pushes for as much money as he can for payment for stuff even when he doesn’t need it. MacCready is his biggest weakness; but don’t think you can use him to control him. Hurt or threaten MacCready in the hopes of manipulating Chiv and all you’ll gain is one extremely pissed off guy who’ll throw himself into any danger to save him. Poor skills: Chiv is an absolutely terrible shot, can’t aim to save his life. Tends to spray-and-pray, and ends up favoring a shotgun because it’s the only thing with a wide enough spread. Awful at cooking, like truly horrendous. Affiliations: Minutemen Former affiliations: Railroad Enemies: The Institute Neutral affiliations: Brotherhood of Steel, initially; this changes to enemies later. Likes: Sugar bombs. Beer. MacCready. His shotgun. Collects cool melee weapons but is too scared to use them. Cats, worries a lot when he sees wasteland cats and wants to take care of them. Taboo Tattoos magazine. Dislikes: Fucking terrified of sentry bots and assaultrons, gets chills when he hears their voices and will do anything he can to avoid them; he spent like twenty minutes working up the courage to approach Cabot house and won’t go near KL-E-O full stop. Hates all the bugs and insects, thinks they’re disgusting and annoying. Gunners. Raiders. Friends: Nick Valentine sees him as an annoying but lovable nephew. Hancock also acts as a sort of benevolent uncle to him and MacCready, giving them guidance and aid where he can. Grows close to Daisy in Goodneighbor through MacCready. Deacon, although this friendship is somewhat tense for the most part. Vadim Bobrov, Travis Miles, and Drummer Boy. Acquaintances: Piper Wright, whom he doesn’t quite trust enough to fully befriend; he’s worried she’ll dig up his past. Preston Garvey, whom he gets on well with, but who disapproves of a lot of Chiv’s actions. Personality: Cocky, rude, honestly a bit of an asshole. Thinks he’s funny but is usually just being a jerk. Under the surface, he’s anxious and insecure and has some issues with affection (both showing and receiving). Chiv has survivor’s guilt, especially over the circumstances of him getting into the Vault. He also has ADHD which can make him a little chaotic at times, and difficult to get to settle on one task. For the most part, though, he’s upbeat and joky (even if those jokes are often in poor taste). Favorite color: Dark, mossy green. Favorite foods: Post-War, sugar bombs. Pre-War, burgers. Pines for hot dogs. Favorite sweets: Fancy Lad Snack Cakes, always has a box tucked in his pack somewhere.

If you like Chiv, you can read more about him on my AO3!

#chiv arroyo #fallout 4 oc #fo4 oc #sole survivor #sole survivor oc

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sirwaddlesesquire · 8 years ago

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Ch. 5 - Observations and Comparisons: A Nature Documentary (Love is Not Time’s Fool, Part I)

Looking in through the glass of the car window from the outside, Pacifica Northwest observed the nerd.

The wild nerd can be an elusive creature. The documentary style narration played in her head in a decidedly British accent. Its natural habitats are indoor locations, such as the library or the game store. Rarely does the nerd leave them. When it does, it will often bring various objects reminiscent of those places in order to feel more at home in the outside world. We see an example of this before us, as this particular nerd has his nose buried in a book and has papers strewn about him. While an odd thing for me or you, this is perfectly natural for the nerd as a defense mechanism. Fascinating!

A shake of the head stopped that train of thought. She had met David Attenborough once at a charity event in the Smithsonian Natural History Museum. It had been an entire evening spent listening to him describe the various animals in the exhibits, the man waxing poetic about the incredible features of the Eastern Gray Squirrel. After hearing him in real life, it felt odd to hear him in her head. His voice was … much too erotic.

Pacifica knocked on the car window, and was rewarded by the choked off yell of Dipper Pines as he jumped and threw his books and papers everywhere, much to her amusement.

The young man glanced up at her laugh and gave a sheepish look. He quickly gathered up the materials; pages and tomes shuffled together and stuffed in a shoulder bag. After placing the bag carefully in the back seat, he exited the vehicle (an older model VW Beetle) and walked around it to Pacifica. They shared a hug of greeting before stepping back.

“Sorry about that!” She said, though she couldn’t keep the touch of humor from being audible. “I didn’t mean to startle you. I guess I didn’t realize you were concentrating that hard.”

“No, no. No need to apologize.” Dipper responded. He rubbed the back of his neck. “I tend to get pretty distracted sometimes. Bad habit, you know?” He flashed her an embarrassed smile. It made him look young and she found it to be charming.

“I think it’s cute.” She informed him. And she meant it. In many ways, Dipper was an adorable dork. Rather, he was still an adorable dork. She could remember him from their rare and varied encounters in their youth. He had always been excited over a new mystery or puzzle, and would become completely absorbed, eager to get to the bottom of it. She could tell that his youthful exuberance had become a deep intelligence and demanding curiosity. The male Pines twin liked to understand how things worked. As someone who employed similar desires in work and in life, Pacifica respected that.

His smile, if anything, became more embarrassed, and he turned to the passenger side car door. It took a couple of tries for him to realize it was still locked. He shot a look over his shoulder to see if she had noticed. She kept a cheerfully blank look on her face, pretending that she hadn’t. After using the key, he finally got the door open. He took a step back, and held it open, indicating that she was free to take a seat.

“Such a gentleman,” she teased. “You must do this for all the ladies.”

“Just Mabel.” He replied. “And now you.” Pacifica didn’t have a response for that, and when she met his gaze, his eyes were a touch serious. Fortunately, she was spared by the closing of the car door. As Dipper walked around to the driver’s side, she worried she had already set a bad tone for their date, and she felt guilty.

However, when the young man sat down behind the wheel, he was smiling and had a genial air about him. He started the car, immediately turning off the radio before any music could play. With a slight suspicion of exactly which artist he had been previously listening to, Pacifica took the opportunity to glance around the interior. It certainly showed its age in terms of equipment and style, but it was clean and comfortable.

Dipper must have noticed her inspection, because he shrugged. “Mabel wanted cute and cozy. I wanted good gas mileage and no car payment. This checked all the boxes.”

“Smart,” she replied. “I like it.”

“Thanks.” The male Pines then pitched his voice to convey irony. “Now, are you ready for an evening of whimsy and enchantment?”

She chuckled at his terminology and at the slight self-deprecation. “I most certainly am. What exactly do you have planned for us?”

“Oh, I pulled out all the stops. Just you wait!” He pulled away from the curb. “So, how was work?”

They discussed work during the drive. Pacifica talked about her day, trying to gloss over the boring details like meetings or some new ordinances passed by the Gravity Falls mayor. But every time she attempted to spare Dipper from something he would find to be dull, he would ask questions and prompt her to keep taking. Before she knew it, she was ranting about the ridiculous legislative decision making of Mayor Cutebiker and the inane restructuring she would now need to do for several of her businesses. Dipper nodded through all of it, adding a relevant comment here and there. As her rant came to an end, she stared at him questioningly.

“You can’t actually be interested in this stuff.” She stated. “It’s seriously just silly things I have to deal with. You shouldn’t have to listen to it.”

The male Pines kept his eyes on the road, though the corner of his mouth turned up. “I wouldn’t say non-interested. I just don’t know much about it.” He said. “But it’s clearly important to you, and so I like listening.” His tone was very matter-of-fact.

“Oh,” was all she could think to say in response to that.

Something must have been present in her voice, because he spared a glance at her. She waved him away, attempting to dismiss any concerns. She didn’t want to reveal the response his statement had touched off in her.

“Tell me about your day. What’s it like working in the library?” She asked, both wanting to change the subject and keep the conversation going.

“Impossibly banal.” Dipper answered sardonically. “Now, I’m not saying I got into library sciences for the sex appeal… but I thought surely there would be a little more to the day-to-day at least.”

“Pretty routine then?”

“Yeah, and the routine is also pretty simple.” He explained. “It seems like a lot of people take after a certain deputy-sheriff and don’t do much reading. Which, in what is certainly an ironic statement coming from a librarian, may actually be a good thing.”

His sheepish look returned, and he pulled a little at his collar. “It’s just that, uh, I’ve started writing a book. Hopefully a book series, really. And slow days at the library give me more time to work on it.” He jerked his thumb at the back seat. “I was doing a little work before…”

“Before I scared the heck out of you?” Pacifica offered.

“… before our date started.” He finished sternly. Though the twinkle in his eye removed any potential for venom from the words.

“Well, that sounds really neat.” She said. “What are they going to be about?”

“It’s mystery slash adventure.” Dipper answered, becoming animated. “The two kids are in the woods one day when they discover…”

His synopsis continued. Pacifica listened fondly, recalling her earlier thoughts about a certain dorky quality of her date. Eventually, they pulled into a parking lot. The car came to a stop and she took stock of the scene as Dipper got out. They were in a strip mall in a part of town she didn’t think she’d been to before. A hardware store and a vape shop occupied the spaces on either side of the restaurant they had parked in front of, a place bearing the name ‘Hellas Good Food’. She reached for the door latch, to find the door already open and Dipper holding a hand out. She took it and allowed him to help her exit the Bug.

“Greek?” She asked.

“You mentioned you liked it,” was his answer. “I did some investigating, and this spot, for all that it’s a hole-in-the-wall, is supposed to be the best. Apparently precisely because it is a hole-in-the-wall.”

Pacifica blinked. She had mentioned she liked Greek food. She had mentioned it several weeks ago. Had he really remembered?

Dipper gestured to the restaurant. “Shall we?”

Pacifica beamed. “We shall.”

Dinner was, in a word, excellent. The friendly owner of the place, a boisterous man named Zorba, attended to them personally. He told them the story of his emigration from Greece and regaled them with all he had seen. Dishes were recommended and subsequently consumed. And even if it wasn’t the best Greek food she had ever had (largely due to her vacation to the country a few years back), it was a close second. Mostly, she was impressed and appreciative of the effort Dipper had made. It was touching.

After he picked up the tab, they returned to the car, with Dipper once again exhibiting chivalry. He maneuvered out of the lot and drove in the direction of downtown.

“So, where are we off to next?” She asked. “I mean, assuming there is a next, of course.”

He chuckled. “That was stop one of three, actually. Now, I’m not going to claim that stop two will blow you away, but I do believe it will leave quite the impression.”

She attempted to pry more information from him throughout the drive, but he remained tightlipped. The trip was light-hearted and full of banter, and she was almost sorry as they parked once again.

That was until she noticed where they were: The Gravity Falls Theatre Time Theater. She had only to catch a glimpse of the name “BABBA” displayed on the marquee for her to understand exactly what was going on. As she accepted Dipper’s assistance out of the car, she raised an incredulous eyebrow at him. His grinned in response.

“I never said what kind of impression…”

Afterwards, they were in agreement in only one aspect: Gravity Falls’ adaption of the musical had been terrible.

“Unforgivable, really.” Dipper said. “It’s simply beyond the pale to take what is already awful source material and somehow make it worse.”

“Utterly abominable.” Pacifica said. “I cannot believe they could have what was already basically a modern masterpiece and completely fail to land any jokes or emotion with it.”

They debated on what had ultimately been the dooming feature and when they had known of the impending failure. She claimed it was right at the beginning, when the emcee had announced that the part of the lead would be played that evening by Toby Determined. He claimed it was when the audience had collectively realized the script had been altered to cause the story to take place in lumber country Oregon. Both admitted that the fact that the very first note of the evening had been off-pitch had also been a bad sign.

The playful back and forth continued along their next car ride, though this one was shorter, and up until they were seated in what Pacifica discovered was the town’s newest whiskey bar.

“Let me guess,” she said knowingly, looking at Dipper over the top of the drink menu. “You remembered that I said I was more of a whiskey girl.”

Her date said nothing, studying his own menu pointedly. But she could almost feel the pleased grin on his face. She dropped her gaze back down to the selection, trying to decide what appealed most. She also wondered what the extent of Dipper’s whiskey knowledge was, and what he would order. When the waiter appeared and asked what they would like, Dipper gave the ‘ladies first’ gesture.

“It’s an Irish whiskey kind of night, I think. I’ll take two fingers of the Jameson 12. Neat, of course.” She stated, folding her menu and fixing a look on Dipper, curious.

The young man took a couple more glances around the page, then spoke in a firm voice. “Your selection of the smoky blends is a little lacking, but I do agree with the lady that it is an Irish kind of night. I’ll have two fingers of the Connemara, the single malt. And go ahead and dash some water in. I’d like that peat to open up.” He calmly handed the menu over and met Pacifica’s gaze as the waiter retreated. They looked at each other across the table.

She had only to hold the eye contact for a couple of seconds more before Dipper flushed and glanced to the side. “I, um, may have been doing some research.” He admitted, his voice uncertain. “You know, to make sure I didn’t embarrass myself.”

As cute as it was to see him flustered, Pacifica felt bad for making him uncomfortable. She reached out and placed her hand on his, both now resting on the table top. She gave his a squeeze.

“It was very sweet of you. And rather impressive as well. You looked good, ordering like that. Thank you.” She smiled in gratitude, and she returned it. They stayed like that for a bit, waiting for their orders. When the drinks arrived and the waiter had left again, they each raised their glass, clinked them together, and took a sip. She hummed her approval and he nodded in agreement.

“So,” Pacifica said casually as they each lowered their glass. “Just how hard would you say you’ve been trying tonight?”

To his credit, Dipper didn’t flinch or ask her what she meant. He did give a small grimace before taking another drink. This one was a little bigger than the first. After setting it back down, he met her eyes.

“Honestly? Decently hard, I would say.” His answer was careful, but had the ring of candor to it. He looked contemplative, though his eye contact was steady. “I felt really bad about that other night. We both did, Mabel and me. We were both pretty worried after you ran out like that. It was… sudden.”

He absentmindedly rotated the napkin under his glass so that it was perpendicular to the table edge, doing so without looking away from her. “And then Mabel told me about your conversation. About how you felt with the whole ‘us’ thing. About the vibe we gave off. And…” He sighed. “And I’m sorry about that. So, yes, I guess I tried pretty hard on this date, to try and help move you away from some of those bad feelings.”

Pacifica smiled at this, hopeful that he couldn’t read the touch of pretense in it. Dipper was impossibly caring, and she could feel her reaction to that in her gut. However, he was also somewhat naïve and seemed to have more than a touch of self-doubt. She imagined that the combination must sometimes prevent him from taking proper credit when it was due.

“I really appreciate that.” She told him. “But I am afraid I don’t believe you. I don’t believe you when you say you are trying pretty hard on this date.” She rushed the last sentence to prevent his obviously forthcoming objection, and he settled back down.

She gestured around her. “We’re at a whiskey bar right now. Because I said I enjoyed whiskey. Before that, we went to a musical. A bad musical. And one that you don’t even like in the first place. But one that I like. And for dinner, you tracked down a Greek restaurant, due to a single line from me ages ago. Honestly, I forgot I even said that.” She shook her head, still somewhat unbelieving that all of this could have occurred. Let alone occurred to her. “I’m going to go out on a limb, and guess that you also do this for Mabel. I’m going to guess that you do this for her all the time.”

Dipper frowned, seemingly caught off-guard by the sudden twist in the conversation. “I mean, I guess so?” He didn’t sound certain.

Pacifica rolled her eyes affectionately. “Ok, how about this. Tell me what the two of you did on your first official date as a couple. Did you take her out?”

“Um, yeah, actually. I took her to a county fair.” The male twin scratched his head, and she could see the remembrance in his eyes. “She had seen something about it in the school paper, and mentioned having a craving for corn dogs. So when the weekend came, I took her there as a surprise. She was so excited!” He chuckled fondly.

“We must have crisscrossed those fair grounds half-a-dozen times. And we definitely went on every ride in the place. But only after we ate far too many corn dogs. She kept insisting on putting powdered sugar from the funnel cake stand on them.” He groaned suddenly. “That’s right! She made me go on the tilt-a-whirl. God I hate that ride. I, uh, I threw up most of those corn dogs afterwards.” He shot her a bashful smile before taking gulp of his whiskey. “It was not dignified. At all.”

She covered her mouth with a hand, attempting to hide just how amusing she found that. As well as just how incredibly sweet. When she had it back under control, she fixed him with a piercing look. “Exactly my point. You went out of your way to show Mabel a great time, precisely because you knew it was something she wanted to do. You even sacrificed dignity for it.” She raised her glass in a gesture of acknowledgment, and then polished off the remaining whiskey. “Don’t sell yourself short, Dipper. You aren’t trying very hard. You’re just being yourself.”

Dipper attempted to grab the attention of the waiter, looking past Pacifica and holding up a single finger to indicate the need for a second round. “Well, maybe. But it isn’t anything special, right? It’s just the normal way to treat someone you love.”

Pacifica quickly looked down at the table, schooling her face into a blank and neutral slate. She did not want to reveal the emotional flat line his words had caused within her. In her experience, Dipper’s attitude was indeed something special. She couldn’t recall that last time someone had done as much for her as he did for Mabel. Or as much as he had done for her today. And for him to just casually comment on it like that? She wasn’t angry. Just astonished. And maybe a little sad.

Her silence must have tipped him off though, because she could feel his eyes return to her. She glanced up briefly to see him staring at her, his features concerned and sincere. She swiftly returned to studying the table, uncertain beneath the intensity of such a gaze.

He seemed to understand, however. “Shit,” he breathed. “Mabel mentioned something about this. I’m so sorry Pacifica, I should have remembered.” She was vaguely aware of him adding a second finger in his signal to the waitress.

“Maximillian.” She stated flatly. Feeling his impending question, she continued. “I’ve really only had one serious relationship. Some flings here and there, that awkward whatever that is in high school. But in terms of mature, adult relationships? There’s only been one. Maximillian Hensley Schmidt.”

“Heck of name,” came a cautious comment from across the table.

She smirked wryly. “It gets worse. Technically I should be adding ‘the fourth’ to it.” She glanced up in time to see Dipper pull a face, and she chuckled. The laugh felt good. She barely acknowledged the placement of two new drinks in front of her, instead just picking one up and holding it against her forehead. The chill from the glass spread across her skin, and she figured she must be more flushed than she had realized. Dipper remained silent, for which she was grateful. It gave her a chance to collect her thoughts.

“We met at a fancy fundraiser downtown. He was a young lawyer, I was a young businesswoman. I didn’t think much of that first meeting, besides the fact that he was handsome and probably pretty well-off.” She sneered, displeased with her past self. “But apparently he thought something of me. He began courting me. And I mean the traditional courting, like from the movies and whatnot. He sent flowers, made formal visits, arranged for us to appear at events together. It was all pretty flattering. Especially when there was the sense of expectation, a sense that this was what you’ve been waiting for. A sense that this was what it was supposed to look like.”

Pacifica gave a bitter chuckle and tossed back the whiskey, downing the entire glass in one go. “It seemed like a pretty solid match. One of those power couples you are always hearing about, you know? Lawyer and businesswoman, two young professionals. It’s the dream, what more could you want? The town certainly seemed to agree, what with the attention we attracted. My parents definitely were on board, which maybe should have been a clue.” The second drink disappeared in another gulp and she returned the glass to her forehead.

“It took me awhile, but I finally realized that there wasn’t any emotion behind his gestures or his words or behind his anything, really. Everything looked good from the outside, and in hindsight, that was probably the point. But from within the relationship? The ‘tokens of affection’ were basically bribes, the ‘sweet nothings’ were empty of any heart, and the ‘sex’ was passable at best.” She caught Dipper’s little fidget at the mention of sex, and she gave a half-hearted grin at how adorable he was. The grin twisted into a frown at the irony of her next thought, which she articulated. “He was essentially completing a series of tasks that he was required to input in order to create a result. They were steps in a mating dance, and he was performing them like we were on some nature documentary.”

It took a moment to work up the courage, but she finally put the glass back down, placing both of her hands flat on the table, and looking Dipper in the eye. “Despite all of that, we still ‘courted’ for a long time before I ended it. Another year, at least. A year! Even after I realized what a mockery the whole thing was and what a fake he was. What a sham I was. It’s pretty disappointing, really.”

She rolled her neck, attempting to steady herself for her next words. “That ended about half a year ago? I’ve been pretty freaking single since, and had planned on staying that way for a while. At least, right up until you two came along.” She tried to give him as meaningful a smile as she could, hoping to convey some sense of what she felt. “It was difficult, to see the two of you in comparison to all of that stuff with him. But it’s better now. Time spent with Mabel the other day and time spent with you tonight has shown me how different it can be. How different it should be.”

Her voice became soft, and she blinked rapidly to ensure she wouldn’t embarrass herself with any watery eyes. “Regardless of what happens here or where this goes, I’ll forever be grateful for that. So thank you.” The next words came out a whisper and she squeezed her eyes shut. “Thank you.”

The sudden warmth on her hands as Dipper clasped them in his own startled her, and her eyes shot back open. His face was tender and he spoke softly but empathetically. “Hey. That guy was a total jerk. Fuck him.” She gave a surprised snort and he grinned somberly. “Seriously. You don’t need people like that in your life, and you should never have to question yourself or your own worth. And not because I say so or because Mabel says so, but because you do. Because it’s the truth. You’re something else, Pacifica. I see it, Mabel sees it, and I know so many other people do as well. One guy didn’t and that’s his loss. He chose to be an ass about it, and that eliminates him from any further consideration from you. Forget him. You don’t have to deal with him ever again. You understand?”

The emotion choked her, and she could only offer a nod in response, not trusting herself to speak.

“Good,” he said, giving her hands a squeeze. “Now what do you say I drive you home? That Jameson is pretty strong stuff. At least, that’s what I understand from my reading…”

Pacifica laughed. She couldn’t help it. Even at his most serious, he was still such a dork. He helped her down from the chair and put an arm around her to help escort her. She leaned over and kissed his cheek and as she did so, the savory sounds of Mr. Attenborough once again danced through her head.

The nerd stumbles through his own mating ritual, seemingly at a complete loss on what the steps are. He is perhaps unaware that he is even performing it in the first place. It is truly a sight to behold, unlike any other in the animal kingdom. And yet, when it comes to an end and when all is said and done, it has resulted in a complete and rousing success. Fascinating!

#pinecest #pinescifica #love is not time's fool #wild nights #observations and comparisons a nature documentary

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