#choice based handling

[defilerwyrm]

Choice-Based Training Log 001

Intro; Purpose

I'm starting a new series here on my blog. @woah-wtf-is-this reminded me of some videos I'd seen, enjoyed, thought "I should do that!" about, and...promptly forgot: videos on something called choice-based handling for snakes, in which you teach snakes that they can choose to come out of their enclosures and climb on you instead of just, you know, going in and picking them up.

This was and is a game-changer for me. I have some very friendly snakes and I have some rather unfriendly snakes and a lot in between, but the idea of having a trusting-enough relationship with at least some of them is highly attractive. So with @woah-wtf-is-this's encouragement, I'm giving this a first try.

If you want to follow these updates, follow the tag: snake training log If you DON'T want to see these updates, blacklist that tag instead.

Seiryu: Step 2

This is Seiryu, a juvenile blue phase Kunashir Island locality Japanese rat snake, Elaphe climacophora. I bought her from BSR Auctions. She lives in a tank on the rack to the right of my desk, third shelf from the top, so she's been able to see me almost all day, almost every day for most of this year.

She's been going about her business while I do the same or some time now, so I reckon we're past step 1; therefore I started at step 2—standing directly in front of the rack (therefore her tank) while not paying attention to her.

Session 001

I spent about 35 minutes standing in front of the rack while watching videos on my larger monitor and drinking water. It was quite difficult to do so but I managed to mostly ignore Seiryu's tank.

However, I was about to observe two super interesting things.

First: at least three times, and from different locations, she peeked out of hiding to watch me for a while, then slowly approached the front of the tank to varying distances, watched me a few moments more, and then slowly retreated backwards. This tells me that she's definitely curious about me—we've had plenty of positive and peaceful interactions before—but still nervous.

Second: a second snake came out of hiding and approached to watch me from another tank!

Enyo: Step 2

Enyo is a baby spied (spider pied) ball python bred by Wilbanks Reptiles. She lives in a tank on the second shelf from the top on the same rack as Seiryu. Due to having a visible wobble, I will never breed her.

Like Seiryu, she came out of hiding to watch me, and approached closer multiple times. Unlike Seiryu, she did this without retreating, instead getting a little closer each time.

Since she's showing obvious curiosity, she's going to be subject number two!

Overall I think we're off to a great start!

[incoherentchanting]

this shit is so funny

[smtown-tourist]

You know, I gotta say, the fact that GOT7 has yet to do a 7 Deadly Sins inspired comeback feels like a crime

[nicorobinphd]

stg, being an enjoyer of jane twdg is like being forced into an expert-level course on the way misogyny manifests in video game spaces.

god forbid a woman be complex or difficult or provably mischaracterized (see tags) at the end of her arc to service the culmination of a man’s storyline.

[sludgekludge]

kind of surprised you didn't talk more about valentino getting merch, honestly. but yeah, totally insane how viv treats her fanbase. /gen

i don't find the way he's handled in the show (or the posts vivzie makes/likes about him) to be any more distasteful than making merch of valentino to be honest. i'm not saying i don't think it's weird or offputting, but stella (at least according to the show) is intended to be this turbo abusive violent husband beater and she consistently gets sexy merch all the time. there's one (maybe more) old valentine's art of her literally featuring impact play gear. the woman who apparently hits her husband enough that he can expect it enough to effectively intercept it

there's 0 tact when it comes to earnestly attempt to depict abuse in these shows and i'm not really surprised they get merch. tasteless but not at all surprising

[listenheresweaty]

Reminder that Stirringjuice/Ven themself has said that TMC is not fetish content. Kister’s works are NOT an extension of what was described in the allegations document. If you don’t want to consume TMC content anymore, fine (best you don’t— not in a way that gives Kister money anyway), but don’t spread misinformation.

EDIT: after rereading Ven’s callout document and finally being able to access ALL the screenshots he attached, I have decided that I will no longer support him. I will not go back to supporting Alex Kister yet, but I cannot support a blatant ableist transphobe either. link to annotation doc: (not mine) https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vReErDatnpQ_h3W-WlqrmzmPN26-UyDwLVwBKmHV09WhVZtdZQM44HRxvoV0ZTz8Ho-NaBVKYxjNuha/pub

Things I will be addressing:

Why I do not support Ven (separate from other victims)

Stuff that Alex Kister DID do wrong, even if the allegations were exaggerated/faked/done out of malice

The allegations and victims themselves.

WHY I DONT SUPPORT VEN

First of all, this ⬇️ (scroll down its below the blue highlighted ss. Formatting issues sorry.). This is a ss of Ven’s (now deleted, now archived post) response to how many people are calling him transphobic for his transmisogynistic comments in his document, and how he had basically outed Alex. Instead of saying something like “it wasn’t transphobic — I had to out Alex— it was necessary for the victims/proof/whatever”, Ven just says that if Alex didn’t want to be outed or subjected to transphobia, he shouldn’t have been a “groomer” (Ven later says that he had misused the word “groomer”. Everyone that Alex had interacted with in a sexual or romantic manner had been an adult, and had fully explicitly VERBALLY consented.)

However. Even if your opponent is a bad person, you do NOT have the right to be transphobic. EVER. criticize them on whatever they’ve done wrong, hold them accountable in a balanced and civilized manner— etc. Being protected from bigotry/ not getting misgendered, privacy, legal counsel— these are all examples of RIGHTS.

When you start denying something based on whether someone deserves it or not, that “something” has become a privilege. By stating that his transphobia was excused because Alex is a supposedly bad person, Ven has stated that not being subjected to transphobia is a privilege. here’s the link: (takes forever to load the keep reading portion but it works for me) https://web.archive.org/web/20240317125855/https://www.tumblr.com/stirringjuicee/745117180204548096/alex-kister-and-actively-using-being-trans-to-lure

Screenshot of the post below, along with something from the callout doc (annotated by a tumblr user. The non-highlighted color text is the annotated bit.

—— ss from ven response (click. It IS An image it just looks like text)

—- now onto some more details.

Ven, or StirringJuice, made the first allegations document against Alex Kister. He had stated himself that he does not consider himself a victim, just a friend of the victims who wanted to spread the word. Ven starts the document off by describing his past relationship with Alex Kister. He also includes screenshots of text messages from Alex— which often contradict or have no relation with what he’s saying. This is why it’s important to look at the screenshots, guys! Most of the toxicity in Ven’s relationship with Alex stemmed from Ven’s refusal to honestly his boundaries or feelings. He told Alex that he was comfortable with the sexual comments, he told Alex that he was comfortable being just Friends with Benefits, and he told Alex that they were welcome to vent to him any time <- all of this is corroborated by the text screenshots that Ven himself posted.

In Ven’s text messages, we can see him suggesting that Alex gets a therapist. Great! Nothing wrong there. And then you actually look at the ss:

(Ven is the blue. These ss are linked in the callout document.)

First of all. You cannot force ANYONE to get mental help, regardless of whether you think it’s for their own well-being. If their behavior is harming you, leave. But even the worst people on earth deserve autonomy for these kinds of things. Ven literally states that he had FORCED Alex to get a therapist, and you can see him admit it in the messages above as well.

after these ss links (labeled part 9 in the doc), Ven hits us with this absolute banger:

“[Alex] then decided to go off his meds.”

Someone had already said this, but: YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO SAY THAT TO OR ABOUT A MENTALLY ILL PERSON. EVER. REGARDLESS OF WHO YOU ARE, OR WHO THEY ARE. it’s an insult to every mental health community.

^ also, Alex gives a pretty good reason for going off his medication. Not that they needed to.

^highlighted text is Ven’s callout post. Purple text is a fellow tumblr user’s annotations. They have a whole post with these annotations. I’ll credit them when I’m done writing out my post. [clarification: the annotator uses “she/her” pronouns for Alex, Ven uses he/him. I use they/them because Alex was never publicly OUT as she/her before they were outed, so I’m not sure what to do]

Also: please go on the callout doc and see the “pt. 11” screenshots yourself. There’s a lot of them and I don’t want to add them here, but please go see them.

^Ven hears that Alex wants to start a new chapter with them (yknow, like redeem the toxic relationship they’ve had) and immediately assumes it’s in the romantic sense.

^Alex admits that they are not ready for a committed relationship, a good first step for smoothing over any toxicity.

^nothing else to add. Annotator did great.

^ text ss as listed under the “pt. 14” link

These are 3 out of 10 ss under the Pt. 15 link. Look at the text indicated to with the red arrow (drawn by me). Ven literally tells Alex that they “don’t understand anything ever.” They also tell Alex in a later ss (plz find it yourselves because I’m not posting all 10 photos) that they “don’t understand [their] own emotions.”

Maybe Alex was making an unhealthy decision by continuing to reach out to someone they clearly had an unhealthy relationship with. But these responses are borderline abusive, especially when aimed at someone who suffers from paranoia.

A huge chunk of the entire callout doc is Ven venting about his relationship with Alex. This relationship is not abusive, it is toxic on both sides. The fact that Ven put this much focus on these barely relevant details— even when the topic was the victims, not Ven himself— suggests that he did this out of petty vindictiveness. If the allegations are true, the victims deserved a BETTER PERSON and a BETTER FRIEND to share their story. Not someone who did it purely because it was en excuse to get revenge. If it wasn’t revenge, why add all these details?? (funny thing— the whole doc. Would be more believable if Ven hadn’t added all this stuff. He destroyed his credibility before even getting to the allegations).

the one below has more transphobia and general assholery than ableism.

^apparently once you are out of the closet, you are not allowed to go back or feel ashamed. Else you are lying and manipulative. Thanks, Ven.

I am done posting screenshots from the annotation document. Please, PLEASE read it in full. I will tag it in the comments. There are so so so many good points.

STUFF THAT ALEX HAS DEFINITELY DONE WRONG, REGARDLESS OF WHETHER THE ALLEGATIONS ARE TRUE OR FALSE:

(Orange text is annotator, black is original doc).

Venting to/ Relying on a minor fan for mental health support (I think it was Mitchie). That’s not good.

making allusions to suicide during their relationship with Ven. Joke or not, that’s unhealthy.

ALLEGATIONS/VICTIMS:

wont say much here because I’m getting tired. some people on Reddit have been pointing out that some discord ss (not the ones I’ve shown you, those were imessage ss) look faked because there is use of military time, which is not an option on discord apparently. Other screenshots seem to use different fonts as well, further indicating forged evidence. I have fact-checked none of this and can’t verify it (not that you should be relying on my word alone, anyway).

I do not support Mitchie, since they’ve been telling people to self-harm and/or commit suicide when they point out flaws in the callout doc. I don’t care what you’ve been through. There is no excuse for that.

As for the other victims.. I find their statements fishy. However, I will not disbelieve them until more has been cleared up.

[armed-saphire]

trying to enjoy this Until Dawn lets play but they complain about every jumpscare leading them to look up spoilers to know when they happen they get pissed when someone dies they get pissed at QTEs they talk over the whole story and then dont know whats going on they spent like 10 minutes doing a lecture about why josh's mental illness is portrayed badly instead of playing the game and they missed so much story they think josh set up the prank on hannah so therefore hes a horrible person and they hate him

[starlitvesper]

This is total non-news, but someone left a couple of extremely rude comments on one of my fics that’s clearly marked with [fringe kinks] and tagged as Dead Dove. And the comments were, of course, basically, “I can’t believe you made me read this with my own eyes, you’re a creep and the reason I’m leaving that fandom.”

So, here’s my reminder that nobody owes you an apology if you wander past a dozen explicit signs warning you that [thing you viscerally hate] is contained herein, and you go ahead and engage with the content anyways.

In this lifetime, you’ll encounter plenty of stuff that Is Not For You. It’s up to you to be mature enough to moderate your own experience and take accountability when you expose yourself to things you know will be a bad time for you. I’m a big horror fan, but I have some major NOPE’s, and I’ve given things a try only to turn them off midway through because it turns out, yep, still don’t like body horror or copious, visceral gore. Those things get to exist, though, and it’s no problem of mine so long as there are no actual victims.

[vanikey]

Current cat: 2 (almost 3!!) year old calico Rumi who only plays with hair ties and wand toys, is super cuddly with me but is slightly feral in the sense shes terrified of people (except me and one of my friends who comes over every Friday for numerous hours to watch shows lmao), she's a bit mischievous, and I learned when I adopted her she's good with dogs but never got an answer about other cats bc the foster literally dumped her in my arms and fled LOL (the adoption place was like ???)

Stella: 4 year old Russian blue that only plays with hair ties, also gets along with dogs but no one knows about other cats, also shy and cuddly once getting to know ppl, loves butt scratches lol, will need a slow trial and error introduction period probably

Smokey: 10 year old black and white angel who is shy at first but cuddly (can u tell i have a type), likes feather toys/flat scratchers/bird videos (i already have these things), gets along with other cats (will still probably need an introduction period), and loves to sleep

[defilerwyrm]

Can we have a snakes update please? I'd be interested in knowing how voluntary handling has been going for you

Sorry for the long wait! Between the holidays, getting sick for a while, and massive sleep issues on my part, we've mostly been on a break, but:

Enyo hasn't come all the way out of her tank yet with the door open, but she does poke her head & neck out a bit. Her tank's door is a swing-down job, so that likely has something to do with her hesitance.

Seiryu still freezes up when I open the door. She's getting better at tolerating me touching her, though; a few days ago she struck at me but only half-heartedly, and she while she does get a little upset if I rest a fingertip on her, she hasn't had a go at me since that time.

[normalgirlatron]

max trying to stop kate from jumping

[depvotee]

Call me a pussy or whatever but I do love playing as good karma, I got teary eyed when Aylin flew again and when she reunited with Isobel, when I was assured that the Shadow curse was lifted like idk man like the defeating evil with the power of love with your friends and sheer will for wanting a better future for your friends and you, idk man, I love u bg3

[squisheebugdoodles]

Working on a caster for dnd (much to @egirl-vrissy's delight since she's been trying trying to get me to play a caster for like. three years now unsuccessfully) right now, and currently fascinated by the "message" cantrip's implication that magic is a form of radiation since among other far thicker things, "a thin sheet of lead" can stop the spell from working. Rotating ideas in my mind about the worldbuilding potential of that wrt the fact that i LOVE when magic users' spells have a physical impact on them the more they use them and how this could be a really neat feature to implement.

It's not even relevant to my character cuz my guy isn't gonna use that cantrip but i DO think it's a fascinating implication and could be both horrific and VERY funny to look deeper into that for a future character.

Instead but equally interesting and to me personally very funny is that my guy is going to experience temporary madness when we finish battles cuz he doesn't like and can't handle physical violence or killing <3

[paint-music-with-me]

.

[literalite]

fyi if u cant handle insects or body horror this would notttt be the anime for u lol

[calsvoid]

i wanna cry i just finished the last episode of one day at a time and god it fucking hurts how relevant it is