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dragonkeeper19600 · 2 years

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How I Would Fix Houseki no Kuni

By now, you guys are probably more familiar than you’d like to be with the numerous posts I’ve made about what I see as the many narrative failings of Houseki no Kuni.

I’ve already written extensively about my gripes with this train wreck of a manga, and as much as I’ve said already, I could keep going. However, over the past few days, I’ve found myself wondering what I would change to make the story stronger. After all, it’s easy enough to identify a problem with a story, but it’s a great deal more challenging to come up with a solution. I’ve already suggested some potential changes in other posts, but I thought I’d assemble all of my brilliant ideas in one convenient location.

So, without further ado, here’s how I would fix the garbage fire that is Houseki no Kuni:

First, I’d have Phos keep the encyclopedia job longer. It always seemed weird to me that this story mechanic was dropped so soon after being introduced, and I don’t think that was to the story’s benefit. Phos becoming more devoted to and more competent at the encyclopedia job would showcase his growing maturity, plus it would lead to a growing curiosity. A big part of what sets Phos apart in the original story is how willing he is to question things that the other gems don’t, such as Sensei’s possible connection to the Lunarians or whether there’s another job for Cinnabar. You could have his desire to learn more come from his desire to get the encyclopedia job right because he’s already fucked up everything else he’s ever attempted, so this is his last chance to be good at something.

Similarly, I would not make Phos a fighter, or, at least, I would wait until later in the series to make him a fighter. Manga and anime is already oversaturated with stories about people who learn how to fight. Having a protagonist who’s strong suit is not fighting would make Houseki no Kuni stand out from other seinen series. Instead, Phos’s usefulness to the war against the Lunarians would be as a tactician, using the information he’s collected from other gems (such as Alexandrite’s obsessive knowledge of the Lunarians) and his own observations to help the other gems fight more efficiently. Phos accepting that he isn't cut out to be a fighter would be yet another sign of his maturity. In my version, after he gets his new agate legs, he decides he can ditch the encyclopedia job and become a fighter like he’s always wanted, just like in the original story. However, after he sees the Amethyst twins shattered by the Lunarian weapon made from Sapphire, he realizes battle isn’t cool and badass like he thought but scary and really tough, and he decides the encyclopedia thing is where he’s needed.

Of course, Phos would be forced to take up arms and finally fight later in the series as the war with the Lunarians is ramping up. Phos would have a moment to muse on the irony of finally getting to be a fighter just like he always wanted after already deciding he didn’t want it anymore.

One more thing about combat is that the gems would wear actual armor into battle. Red Beryl’s job wouldn’t be just to make cute moe moe outfits for the gems to strut their stuff in but to forge armor to protect the gems from the Lunarians’ weapons. The Lunarians would find ways to get through the armor, of course, but it would be better and more believable than sending these rocks into a war zone wearing but ties and shorts too tiny to pass a public school dress code. The gems can still wear their uniforms when they’re just hanging out at the school, that’s fine, but when they go on patrol, they suit up in fucking armor. The fact that they don’t wear their armor around the school could actually lead to some tense scenes where the Lunarians attack the school directly and the gems there are caught unprepared and underdressed.

Phos’s motive for not hibernating during the Winter Arc would be, again, to observe Antarcticite and the winter season for the encyclopedia. However, and this is big, by the time winter ends, Phos would come to blame Sensei for Antarcticite’s shattering. This is a change I suggested in a previous post. The exact scene I described back then is that Phos sees Sensei shatter Antarcticite himself, but I don’t think you need to go that far. Phos’s blaming of Sensei doesn’t even need to be justified; he could just be lashing out at Sensei out of misplaced grief. But something needs to happen during the Winter Arc, while everyone else is asleep, to make Phos suspicious of Sensei. Perhaps Phos actually sees the Lunarians surround Sensei and tug pleadingly at his clothes, like they did in the actual manga, and comes to realize that the Lunarians and Sensei are connected. Perhaps Sensei hesitates to strike back against the Lunarians, because he’s guilty about not being able to help them or whatever, and that hesitation leads to Antarcticite being shattered.

At any rate, by the time winter ends, Phos is the only witness to this suspicious side of Sensei, and he finds that nobody will believe him about what he saw because the others are all refusing to accept that Sensei is less than perfect. The only one who’s willing to listen to Phos at all is Cinnabar because Cinnabar is grateful to Phos for listening to him. Plus, since Cinnabar is already isolated from everyone else, he’s less willing to keep so strictly to the party line. While he still loves Sensei, he’s less complacent than the others. I suggest these changes to the Winter Arc and its fallout because I always thought the chain of events that led to Phos being suspicious of Sensei in the latter half of the anime was pretty week, plus Phos being able to turn to Cinnabar for support would make Cinnabar a more prominent part of the story instead of getting shunted aside like he is in the manga.

Speaking of the Lunarians, I would change basically everything about the Moon. The Moon is not a high tech, utopian society full of karaoke bars, ramen joints, labor unions, advanced laboratories, and all that other stuff, but a surreal, Lovecraftian landscape that looks as beautiful as an ink painting of the Pure Land but is actually nightmarish and hostile. The Lunarians are supposed to be the tormented souls of human sinners unable to pass on to the afterlife, and their world should reflect that. In my version, the Lunarians have been driven insane by their long perdition, and while they look like divine figures from a Buddhist scroll, their behavior is so weird and alien to the gems that they find it hard to believe that these creatures were ever human. They can’t even communicate with the gems because their minds have deteriorated to the point that they can’t even understand language. The only Lunarian who’s coherent and rational is Aechmea, and even he’s starting to lose his sanity after running the asylum by himself for so long.

Aechmea himself would also need to be radically changed. Somewhere along the way, the manga kind of forgot that Aechmea was supposed to be the villain. They try for this reveal that Aechmea was actually benevolent all along, and it 100% doesn’t work because A. a lot of his wicked acts are just gratuitously cruel and don’t further his supposedly well-meaning goals at all and B. the Lunarians aren’t really suffering anyway. To fix Aechmea, his sympathetic qualities and his villainous qualities both need to be enhanced.

So, my version of Aechmea is a well-intentioned extremist who chose the path of the bodhisattva but doesn’t have the supernatural patience and wisdom necessary to handle it. His backstory would be the same, but because my version of the Moon is a hellscape where he’s the only sane person around, his desperation to get Sensei to pray to free both the other Lunarians and himself is way more understandable. At the same time, the story would condemn the cruel things he’s doing by pointing out that he’s got no right to make the other races suffer just to save his own people. Aechmea would be portrayed as a lost soul, pitiful, yet misguided. And, above all, the Lunarians’ salvation cannot come about because of Aechmea’s manipulations. The story needs to show that the path Aechmea is choosing to try and save them is the wrong one.

On a similar note, Aechmea can’t make Phos into a human. I’ve already made a separate post about this note, and the reception to it was pretty positive. If Phos becomes a human/enlightened/bodhisattva/whatever, it needs to be in spite of Aechmea, not because of him. Phos needs to become human through his growing experience and his own choices, not Aechmea’s.

Instead, in my version of the story, Aechmea chooses Cairngorm as Sensei’s replacement. Aechmea chooses Cairngorm because Cairngorm has been sealed inside of Ghost Quartz for most of his life, and thus, has never had any real agency. Hell, maybe Ghost Quartz is shattered specifically so Aechmea can then swoop in and claim Cairngorm, all so he can groom him into becoming a new prayer machine. It’s a sad fact that abuse victims are often abused multiple times in their lives by different people, and oftentimes, their current abuser is someone who “rescued” them from a previous abuser. When Aechmea “frees” Cairngorm from Ghost Quartz’s influence, he portrays himself as a savior who will show Cairngorm what he’s “really meant to be.” Aechmea and Cairngorm’s relationship in the manga already comes across as super predatory and sus, so I think the story would be better if it actually acknowledged that Aechmea grooming Cairngorm is bad instead of portraying their wildly unequal marriage as the “happily ever after” that it does.

Phos, on the other hand, would become a foil to Cairngorm because their growth and change happens because of their own choices and not because of Aechmea’s (you know, like the opposite of how it is in the manga). Phos would also choose to replace his body parts, instead of his body parts being lost through circumstance or being swapped out for him by other people. Him losing his legs can still be an accident, but it has the effect of showing Phos that his inclusions are special because they can assimilate basically any other material while still leaving Phos’s consciousness in control. However, after he gets his agate legs, every other new body part has to be a deliberate acquisition. For example, when he finally decides that he has to fight, he intentionally seeks out the gold alloy to replace his arms, whereas in the manga and anime, his arms were taken away by the ice floes, and replacing them with gold alloy was Antarticite’s idea.

Finally, the ending. In the manga, Phos is essentially tricked into enduring 10,000 years of mind rape to become the new prayer machine. In my version, Phos chooses to undergo the 10,000 year transformation, knowing that it’ll be tortuous and awful, because he’s willing to make that sacrifice to bring the Lunarians peace and finally end the conflict. The gems don’t become Lunarians in this version. My version of Lunarian society isn’t idyllic the way it is in the manga, so the gems wouldn’t want to join them, plus my Lunarians don’t have that kind of technology anyway. The sacrifice in this case is that Phos praying will also cause the gems that have been shattered to pass on as well, meaning Phos will never see Antarcticite again, and all the other shattered gems will be dead for good. But Phos is okay with that because 1. They realize from their interactions with the Lunarians and Yellow Diamond’s declining mental state that immortality is a curse and 2. They’ll still be around, and they’ll still remember Antarcticite, which is specially poignant because Phos has lost so many of their memories by now.

There’s also some tension because when Phos makes this choice, no one is sure that he’ll be able to handle the nightmarish transformation without going insane the way the Lunarians did, and there’s a chance he’ll emerge after the 10,000 years as some kind of monstrous eldritch abomination. And because he looks so weird and alien after the transformation is complete, the surviving gems aren’t sure if he’ll actually be able to pray the Lunarians away or if he’ll become a new threat.

But, ultimately, he shows that the transformation was a success, and he prays all of the Lunarians away. Yes, even Aechmea, because for all the evil he’s done, he also lived every day in pure agony, so there’s no point in punishing him any further.

The surviving gems would still be alive, as would the Admirabilis. (Yeah, the plot point about the living races descended from humanity also being wiped out in the prayer is really contrived and makes no sense, so I’m chucking it entirely.) Phos, however, would no longer live among the other gems because he’s become so enlightened that the other gems can’t relate to them anymore. So, Phos remains aloof. But the other gems know where he is. When a gem is finally ready to die, they seek out Phos, who will ensure that they pass on. Phos vows not to pass on himself until the last gem has been shattered. Phos, the little gem everyone called worthless, has become the benevolent bodhisattva that both Aechmea and Sensei failed to be. End.

#houseki no kuni #hnk #fix fic #alternate ending #phos #phosphophyllite #antarcticite #aechmea #kongo sensei #adamant sensei #cairngorm #lunarians #cinnabar #the thing about the armor is particular is a real pet peeve of mine #red beryl is so terrible at their job i'm surprised the other gems haven't tarred and feathered him already #i don't plan to make any more posts about houseki no kuni #because i'm so sick of this series taking up valuable brain space without paying any damn rent

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ephixltes · 2 years

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[ SOUND ] * your muse prevents my muse from making any sounds. (cinnabar)

― 𝑵𝑶𝑵𝑽𝑬𝑹𝑩𝑨𝑳 𝑺𝑬𝑿𝑼𝑨𝑳 𝑺𝑰𝑻𝑼𝑨𝑻𝑰𝑶𝑵𝑺. ( or not so sexual / open prompts ) // @cxnvicts

She doesn't hesitate—grabbing Cinnabar by the hand and pulling her down to the ground, pushing herself well into Cinnabar's personal space, body to body. Hecate's cold, cold fingers press themselves against Cinnabar's lips in an effort to somehow stifle the taller woman's gasping breaths, whilst her other hand busies itself under the fabric of Cinnabar's shirt, steady despite the situation against the skin of Cinnabar's toned abdomen. Hecate's expression, devoid of expression as it usually is, for once does not match the look in her eye—wide with a plea left unspoken, but no less desperate...

... Somehow separated from the Chief and the rest of their group, and under a barrage of attacks, the taller woman's shield had given way, and she had taken the brunt of the hits that would have otherwise been meant for Hecate. There had been effectively no choice but to retreat and take shelter behind a stack of crates, and hope that they had managed to lose the enemy. Hope that the enemy won't notice or hear them hiding here until the Chief or one of the other Sinners can get to them.

For now, though, they can try to take stock. Hecate can try to take stock. Cinnabar had been hurt—badly. Normally composed, and no doubt experienced in battle, Cinnabar's fading consciousness robs her of some of her better senses. She probably can't help the sound of her ragged, laboured breathing—each breath sounding utterly tortured. Hecate's probing fingers come away from their investigation slick and dark with blood. She has to stem the blood, somehow—she's already torn the sleeves off of her gown to try and use as a makeshift bandage, though with how thin the fabric is, it barely makes a difference, Cinnabar's blood soaking through and through.

She didn't want things to turn out like this. Not again. This is what happens when people show her kindness; when people try to protect her. So they shouldn't—but how can Hecate be angry with the other Sinner, when she has only ever been kind?

"I'm sorry," Hecate hears herself saying. Muttering. Mouthing into Cinnabar's jacket, though they’re supposed to be keeping as quiet as possible. As she tries to hold onto the other woman, to keep her semi-upright, somehow, though Cinnabar is so much taller than she is. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry..."

#// cw blood #» official correspondence // in-character answer #❝ everything that is mine will also be yours // HECATE // in-character #cxnvicts ( cinnabar )#actually i re-read the original post and i realised i got the characters switched around #but i've also already written this sooo..... here you go

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