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i finished it, was kicked out of the game, and then spent the next 10 minutes drawing this. i will now go take a shower, most likely cry, and then go through the emotional turmoil of convincing myself to reset so i can do a geno run. i hate it here :D
#undertale yellow#uty#my art#<- ifg#spoilers under these tags beware. although it is mostly just me being very very sad#that entire thing was heart wrenching. anyways#CEROBAS FIGHT??? HELLO???#i had to exit out of it the first time (i got to the last phase) to get better items but i came back and won pretty quickly#but THE CUTSCENES?!?!?#JFC NO WONDER THIS WOMANS SO MESSED UP. HER HUSBAND PRACTICALLY DIED IN HER ARMS AND THE LAST THING HE LEFT HER WITH- HIS DYING WISH- COULD#ONLY BE FULFILLED BY PUTTING THEIR ONLY CHILD IN DEATHS WAY. AND THEN WHEN SHE TOOK THAT RISK THE WORST THING HAPPENED AND SHE NOW HAS TO#LIVE WITH THE GUILT OF BEING THE ONE TO. MOST LIKELY. KILL HER ONE AND ONLY DAUGHTER#ALL THE WHILE SHE WAS PUSHING AWAY HER CHILDHOOD BEST FRIEND AND CONVINCING HERSELF THAT SHE WAS IN THE RIGHT TO SACRIFICE CLOVER WHO HAD#BEEN ONLY KIND MERCIFUL AND JUST THIS WHOLE TIME. EVEN TO THOSE WHO WERE TRYING TO KILL THEM. FUCK.#AAND WHEN CLOVER HUGGED HER I DOUBLED OVER IRL BC *THATS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED TO DO IN THAT MOMENT* I HATE IT (read: love it) HERE#n dont even get me STARTED on after that. when clover started moving on their own and the gd white screen came up and we got flashbacks of#everyone's words. thats when the tears rlly started coming bc it clicked for me. 'oh. this is it. isn't it?' and IT WAS#WHEN THEY GAVE THEIR FUCKIGN HAT AND GUN AWAY TO MARTLET AND STARLO WELL THATS WHEN I REALLY STARTED CRYING#AAND THE GROUP HUGG#I WAS SOBBING WHENEVER I HAD TO WATCH THEM CRAWL UP AGAINST THE WALL AND DIE AND HAVE FLOWEYS WORDS PLAY OVERHEAD#AND THE FUCKOGN#THE F U C K I N G#AFTEWRCREDITS SCENE WHERE WE GOT THE 'You heard someone calling for help. You answered.' I GOT CHILLS SO BAD#to think that all the other souls have stories just as expansive and emotional as clover n frisks. how fucked up is that. in a good way tho#and finally the last scene where we got all 4 of our main friends sending us off in waterfall and we see clovers items end up in the dump#just waiting to be found by bratty and catty. fucken hell man this was a masterpiece#anyways time to reset and obliterate everyone and never emotionally recover from that ever!! really is feeling like 2016-17 again w the way#this game has me sobbing my eyes out and feeling the guilt of knowing that i dont HAVE to kill them all but im too curious not to#oh well. at least i have the balls to do it this time around instead of letting a youtuber do it for me ig
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Mortal Kombat 1 Behind the Scenes AU: Since when you two are friends?!
[Cage’s Mansion] [Waiting for Liu Kang] [Special Bonus] [Grandmaster’s commentary] [Climbing scene] [Madam Bo’s Inn] [Cage’s Mansion 2 (fire extinguisher)] [Medic] [Shang Tsung’s sad face] [Smoke’s Fall] [Scenography (1)] [Scenography (2)] [Show off!] [Favorite brother] [Climbing on the wall (nonsense)] [Tomas’ commentary] [Perfectly fine] [Sexy, sexy man~♪] [Brothers between filming - Scenography(3)] [Wrong team!]
#mortal kombat#mk1 behind the scenes au#shang tsung#bi han#bi han & shang tsung#kuai liang#sub zero#scorpion#johnny#poor johnny no one listen to him and everyone improvise in the weirderst way possible XD#in trust shang tsung get lost and liu kang sent bi han to fetch the loser#so when they meet bi han and shang tsung surprisingly clicked with each other right away#kuai liang is just too busy with harumi to notice his asocial brother managed to make a friend#and of course the worst (the best) friend possible XD#tomas is probably dying out of laugh somewhere in the background#and we all know shang tsung is gonna lie and say half truth and some fantastic and horrible version of how he met bi han and why they#are friends solely to mess up with kuai liang and everyone around#that at the end of filming no one will know what happened beside him bi han and liu kang who won't want to get involved in that mess XD#it is truly dark time if tormenting kuai liang is my new hobby XD
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In these trying times of AO3 Down, hope rests on the horizon: of the 29 AO3 tabs I currently have open on my phone, 6 of them are loaded and available for me to read. I am blessed beyond measure.
#levispeaks#ao3#i truly lucked out#but also#the horror i experienced#as i clicked each tab#thinking they were all loaded#only to be met with a 503 error screen each time#and it was cruel really#bc i could see the title of each fic right before it was boom bam blasted away from existence#i will treasure the survivors...
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[REDACTED]: You're writing down an awful lot there. Counselor: Just my observations. Does this evaluation make you...anxious?
washed hands interview my beloved
#rvb#red vs blue#agent washington#aiden price#the counselor#this is kinda boring ngl but ehhhhhhhh i put way too much effort into this to NOT post it shsgdjs#idk if its readable anymore bc i had to halve the size of this but i filled out his dogtags lol#those thick bands on his arm are tattoos btw.#and yes my wash has heterochromia bc he deserves it#i did actually color this but i HATED it so. wash had a black eye and sutures across his cheek bc i imagined this interview happening like#right after he beat the crap out of his co. for comparison wash walks away w sutures and a black eye vs his co's broken jaw cracked ribs an#dislocated shoulder. a 'you should see the other guy' moment shsgdhsj#I like to imagine that post court martial instead of throwing him in jail they essentially grounded him and he was barred from going on#missions and he was stuck doing grunt work#they were going to throw his butt in jail but all of his squad mates went to bat for him and the higher ups were like#'omg this guy is way too liked by pretty much everyone if we put him in jail we might have a bigger problem on our hands.'#ANYWAY click or open in a new tab for full quality lol
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also I had a breakthrough today that I had in fact overthought a Specific Problem to Death and that I had created a monster in my own mind and that’s why it felt like I was being eaten alive every time I tried to solve it.
#not to put too fine a point on it but that’s what happened with the whole is Maria going to become a nun question tbh#and I needed a counselor to say to me objectively and yet also crucially without any knowledge of me or my past:#you have overthought this and now you’re terrified of it#anyway it’s so obvious but it came home to me today. slowly.#like it was just like. Oh. You did it again#you’re terrified of this because you have thought of every possibility and every outcome and every twist and turn and shadow—-#until it has become a bloated demon in your mind that is totally separated from reality#while made up of real facts and details! and tbh I know it’s a common problem#but the anxiety chokehold I can put myself in is something that is so impressive and so disturbing#I can render myself absolutely helpless through the meanderings of my own thoughts#and what makes it worse—immeasurably worse—is that I get OUT of problems through careful thought and analysis#I’m programmed that way#so I can’t escape it by the usual means. I have to back away from the monster and see it and NAME it and then it can die away.#and only THEN can I apply my usual ways of going about things. I don’t know it just all clicked today#these past few days have just been bringing it all to a fever pitch for me#anyway I guess it’s also important to me that I still be allowed to be analytical about it!!! I have to use my brain!!!!!!!#in my desperation I have tried to shut it off to feel only with my heart. To try to catch the whisper of God’s voice in the wind#but tbh I am meant to use the gifts I have! But only in the right context#and that’s only after the demon has been killed or more accurately —deflated#my counselor has been so good about this tbh. she’s so matter of fact and blunt and salt of the earth and also she sees how my mind works#and wants me to be able to use it!!#so I’m just going to tell her that I did the bad thing with this other problem and can she help me find a way forward#ANYWAY THE MONSTERS TURNED OUT TO BE JUST TREES
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Sam jone. For the bingo
sam jone ❤️
I finished seeing i today and basically she’s everything to me
#I think sam jones and charley pollard should hang out.#I think they would not click right away I do think it would take time. but I think they could be very powerful as a duo#asks#dweu#I forgot the free space.#edas#sam jone.
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really loving wuwa so far, it still lags a bit here and there but it kinda feels like it just has to marinate for a while? first 10 minutes are painful but after it seems like it has its assets cached or something and it isn't as much a problem anymore. it also looks like kuro games has been working overtime putting in patch fixes asfdjlkadfsj god speed to the devs fr
#0.txt#i'm all about combat gameplay and exploration so i'm having LOADS of fun on that front#i don't really have any opinions on the story yet tbh. its not bad but it's not amazing but i never have high expectations for#early game story to begin with. or gacha games in general tbh ajkladsf#i DO really like the world building in the sense of everything being made up of frequencies. it helps tie a lot of the lore together imo#my only thing is like. honestly if i didn't know who the fuck i was or where the fuck i was why would i go on this puzzle hunt for#some magistrate who i haven't even met in person. but whatever ig lol#character wise i'm running sanhua / yangyang / mortefi#sanhua is the fave here i love the charged attack mechanic where you have to release at the right moment#yangyang's cc is really useful and mortefi is also just fun lol#from trials i REALLY like using jiyan and lingyang so i hope i pull them eventually. still need to try out others though too#in general i definitely prefer the melee characters waaay more than others. i haven't liked a single rectifier yet ajskdlaf#(i got encore off the beginner banner)#my only gripe with the combat is that the range definitely feels a bit small like if you're a little too far away you won't hit the enemy#i'm eager to actually figure out proper playstyles though. i do actually like that effectively just button mashing also works#but it's also super satisfying understanding a character's exact gameplay mechanics#i have not even looked at character building though that is a whatever until it suddenly clicks fadkflaf
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Your teacher grading Vincent for a project must be fun.
I'm actually this 🤏 close to scrapping it.
#devarambles#i know i should trust the process but the process to me right now is a beautiful woman five miles away from my location#The process is Baldurs Gate 3 in a free 3mb download one click away#The process is a dog with a suspiciously pink mouth actively ignoring a jar of cored out strawberry jam#...Wow Vincent even in meta situations you always end up getting scrapped huh...#im thinking too hard on this but that kind of made me feel bad ngl#I could always just draw vince again in a more wholesome setting. or just start painting. oh noooo macabre wins againnnnn
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Gotta say jumping between Lockwood & Co brainrot and Dead Boy Detectives brainrote is fucking wild
Yeah you know that ghost show that takes place in London? The one where the two main boys are each other’s only friends and then they meet the main girl, who has literally nowhere else to go when she meets them? And they become a trio of codependent traumatized teenagers who solve paranormal mysteries?
I have a type of media consumption rn apparently
#honestly when the Dead Boy Detective show comes out y’all need to watch it#it’ll be on Netflix:)#honestly there are more similarities I could name#main girl has a past she doesn’t disclose right away that wasn’t her fault but she sure isn’t gonna advertise it to these boys she just met#one of the boys and main girl click right away#the other boy and the girl don’t#but they end up a great trio#no one has any communication skills#but they sure care <3#(a lot of what I’ve gathered of the Dbd show is ifff articles audition tapes and ofc comics)#also Dbd is in the sandman universe#brainrot guys brainrot#also not to clog up the tags but#lockwood and co#dead boy detectives#just for my own sake so I can find this later <3#honestly if you liked Lockwood and co I really do think you’ll like dbd when it comes out#it’s based on the comic characters but they’re been aged up a bit just how l&co characters where#anyways that’s my Ted talk thanks for listening to my rambling#also that show is gonna have so much pinning my god#Oh my god I forgot about flo#she is lockwoods friend I’m sorry </3
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So Long, London is literally Feyre and Tamlin
#ACOTAR#ACOMAF#So Long London#Tamlin#Feylin#Feyre Archeron#Maasverse Swifties#anti Feylin#high lady of the night court#high lord of the spring court#Swifties#sry not sry tamtam#ship sinking songs#when it just clicks#also high infidelity#and pretty much every toxic song😅😅#putting the EX X in Feyre x Tamlin#like let’s think about this FAERIE LIGHTS THROUGH THE MIST her leaving into the world I kept calm and carried the weight of the rift LITERAL#just them from UTM to ACOMAF beginning pulled him in tighter each time he was drifting away from them falling and his curse to her trying to#make him understand her in ACOMAF then you have MY SPINE SPLIT FROM CARRYING US UP THE HILL coughs ACOMAF wet through my clothes weary bones#caught the chill the wedding and the UTM scenes HOW MUCH SAD DID YOU THINK I HAD IN ME her trying to survive UTM tragedies and then her#with the YOULL FIND SOMEONE I DIDNT opt in to be your odd man out him trapping her out of every plan and in the house I founded the club she#heard great things about oh you mean the spring court built off the savior Feyre blood I LEFT ALL I KNEW YOU LEFT ME AT THE HOUSE literally#he steals her away she leaves her sisters the mortal realm she dies and he traps her in that house he leaves her first then you get into how#much tragedy because that’s what it was and she loved it for so long London BUT THEN ILL FIND SOMEONE cause Rhys two graves one gun IM NOT#THE ONE at the wedding then the bridge always hits YOU SAY I ABANDONED THE SHIP BUT I WAS GOING DOWN WITH IT she was dying there she gave#everything she could holding tight to your quiet resentment the way he just wanted the old her back even though he’s the reason that version#died my friends said it isn’t right to be scared THE LIBRARY every breath rarest air I AM DROWNING when your not sure if he wants to be ther#so just how low do you think I’d go the scene with Cassian of I GAVE EVERYTHING FOR THAT LOVE before I’d self implode what it did to her in#UTM and ACOMAF before I’d have to go be free and that’s Rhys and we’ll find someone
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genuinely i hate summer so much. i have so many things i could be doing. things i need to do. things i want to do. things i would probably enjoy doing if i just did them. and yet. i have been doing nothing. all day. because it's hot and therefore i cannot function, like, at all
#part of the problem is if i move away from the fan i will die#but there are things i could be doing at the fan. and yet. i am not doing them#i did clean Pet Habitats and take out a bunch of trash. i did that at least#my other other problem is im spending way too much fucking money on doordash i have to call an intervention on myself#im not in any financial trouble from it but its. its too many i gotta We Have Food At Home myself#i could engage in Effort or i could click a few things on my phone and get Food From Anywhere Nearby. its too easy its a problem#you mean i could just acquire a milkshake right now without moving from this spot or getting dressed or Anything#how am i supposed to talk myself out of this. i never win this battle
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ever since we figured out my husband, his sister, and his cousins are all autistic, the possibility that i married into an entirely autistic catholic family where all of the older adults are undiagnosed is kind of objectively hilarious tbh. everyone's autistic drives compel them to need a bunch of alone time but everyone's catholic cultural mores compel them to put family first and repress the hell out of themselves. no wonder they're all passive-aggressive as hell to each other all the time and got mad at me when i didn't pick up on how to do "family" that way. i literally did get catholic religious trauma-by-proxy lmfao
#text#ik i haven't been on here a lot lately but my husband's grandpa passed away on new year's day#and that seems to have like... clicked something in both my husband's and my MIL's brains somehow?#(not that i'm saying it's a good thing he passed away. everybody liked him including me; he seems like he was a remarkable person)#like my husband was like ''oh shit vik actually is right about this neurodivergence stuff'' both in himself and in his family#and my MIL actually seems like she might have taken it to heart when i called her out for acting like a grown adult bully lmao?#like she hasn't apologized yet or anything. but now that my husband understands his own neurodivergence;#HE might be able to explain to his mom how she likely has RSD and i wasn't actually rejecting her#i personally struggle to explain this to her without freaking out that i'm not masking enough for her and/or getting angry :)#but ANYWAYS she did not yell at me at the funeral which is a minor victory for now lol#and the funeral was literally the day after my thesis proposal so i am exhausted af#(the thesis proposal went well too btw. i passed & will defend my thesis for real in a couple months; so i'll FINALLY be doctor vik!!)#so that's all the updates for now o7
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hiiii! so i love your reactions, and i really enjoy your danmei livestreams!
but if i could make one tiny complaint? i wouldn’t say anything if this weren’t such a common word in so many danmei novels.
gongzi isn’t pronounced “gong gee.” the “z” is more like that of “zoo,” rather than a “j” or soft “g.” and it doesn’t have the “ee” sound. it’s more like “gongzih.”
here’s a link to a pronunciation: https://dictionary.hantrainerpro.com/chinese-english/translation-gongzi_wage.htm
it isn’t the same meaning, but the pronunciation is the same.
you may notice it the next time you watch a c-drama; many sons of wealthy sects are referred to as “name-gongzi.”
I’m sorry for nitpicking! i hope you don’t mind. i really do love your content!
and I’m also sorry if another version of this ask came through; it disappeared when i went to doublecheck the link, so i wasn’t sure if you got it. sorry again! 💜💜
WAIT, I totally knew about the Z sound in those circumstances and yet never fully noticed that it applied to gongzi specifically (I think because the basic Z/Zh rules didn't fully sink in until way after I had been reading that word). Thanks for the note <3
#GW Asks#ErHa#It may not click into my out loud reading right away but it'll happen at some point#I dunno if the delay is ADHD or english to chinese just being Like That
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i had a great day a comic con today!
highlights include meeting emelie de raven
annnnd getting my first tattoo!
#it's the x-men logo on my left bicep#i hadnt planned this at all - i didnt know you could get tats at cons#but i saw it. and liked the look of it. and something just clicked in my head. didn't get it right away tho i met emelie first#so i had all the time in the world. and while the photo with her was being processed - i got the tattoo#it turned out perfect. not gonna show it off because its been bleeding quite a bit and doesn't look so nice now#but when its all healed up and cleaned up i'll get some pics#but yeah. holy shit i have a tattoo. i drink alcohol and got modification on a whim? oh yes. im a wild girl now kjhfdskjh#anyways. its my first convention since 2018. and my first one without mum of course#i found out about it a week beforehand and it just felt right. which feels like a step in a good direction for me#i made the day of it. and spent the birthday money mum gave back in september. and then some!#nothing at comic con is cheap so i was like. fuck it go ham#i got lotsa merch. i think my favourite purchase (other than stuff with emelie and the tat) is a silver star trek ring i got <3#i like merch with staying power. like clothes and jewellery#oh oh speaking of which i wore my star trek voyager comm badge brooch today. i'd never worn it before so that was nice#one day im gonna get myself a voyager trek uniform to go with my badge and my pips. and i'll wear that to a con#i've gone to several cons but i've only cosplayed once! ...it can be tricky to get organised. but i'll do it again someday#so yeah great day! my feet are fucking killing me! but im so happy!
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i need a show to watch but im so picky with shows. #Miserable
#txt#my fav thing to do is rewatch shows i like but only w/ ppl who havent seen them#so i can live through them experiencing it for the first time#but no one wants to watch them w/ me and the ones that would have seen them already SIGHS#anyways someone reblogged a gifset of a show that piqued my interest. and i watch the first 2 minutes and immediately clicked out#like there can NOT be cringey humor right away come on#maybe i should continue walking dead but i forget where i left off LOLLLL . wait. daryll and that one blond girl#that episode sucked#i should try breaking bad again but i got kind of bored but it was also only the first episode#also id ask for show recs but i cant even explain to you what would grab my attention so theres a 90% chance of me not being interested
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so, i love and vibe w bi leo, it’s so good
however
something just hits different with gay leo who’s been performing heterosexuality for years
#heroes of olympus#leo valdez#like i could write a whole essay on this (not rlly but also yes rlly)#like lil him somehow getting in his head that you have to find someone who likes you and then you’ll grow to love them#and that all guys just think girls are pretty but don’t like them beyond that until they get to know them#and he doesn’t get to explore feelings for girls bc nobody shows interest in him and he keeps like running away from home#and then he meets fake memory jason and something just clicks#but he assumes it’s just bc they mesh rlly well#but then he has the classic italicized oh moment#but he just thinks he’s seeing why girls like jason so much#and so he ignores it and tries to get a gf. bc surely if he flirts w pretty girls he’ll find one who likes him right?#and once he finds a girl who actually likes him then he’ll fall for her and know what all those guys w gfs are on abt#but also mans probably has some catholic guilt n internalized homophobia n shit#bc yknow his aunt calling him a demon/devil (i forgot which it was)#i can imagine him and nico bonding over this and falling for heroes#and he’s SHOCKED when pipes is talking abt what she loves abt women after she comes out#and he’s like ‘wait what???? I’ve never thought that way abt girls ever. you don’t just like them bc they’re objectively pretty????’#and then they have a long convo abt sexuality#and he has a realization that the way piper feels abt women is the way he feels about men (but mainly jason)#maybe he’s also aspec? I could see him being demi and only liking someone after getting a connection w them#valgrace#man now i wanna write a leo sexuality crisis fic#but i got so many fics i wanna write… the main one being a revival fic bc the boys deserve to be happy#but also i need more valgrace fics… and you should be the change you wanna see in the world#as someone who’s arospec i’m just projecting onto him but with a different flavor
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