#clifford kershaw

[mariocki]

Play for Today: Sunset Across the Bay (BBC, 1975)

"It's one of them buses with a lavatory. Are you going to go?"

"I don't want to go."

"I do."

"Well go then."

"I don't want everybody to know I'm going."

"She's been in twice already. She were in there before we got to Stanningley. Anyway, what does it matter what folk think? We're retired now."

[kunzhutka]

[mbergansmile]

Not only can I hear this fucking gif, I can feel it through my body

[kiss-my-freckle]

Katarina-related dialogues, not including Cape May and Requiem episodes. 

This is quite long, but it’s my full list. 

1x1 -

Red: I mean, look at you. Abandoned by a father who was a career criminal, a mother who died of weakness and shame.

2x10 -

Liz: I have no recollection of my mother or my father - not their faces, nothing.

2x15 -

Denner: And your mother? Liz: She died when I was young. The man who raised me, my adoptive father, his name was Sam Milhoan.

2x19 -

The Director: I never saw it before. Liz: Saw what? The Director: How much you look like your mother.

2x20 -

Liz: I had the photo enhanced. It’s a rough extrapolation of features since the face was almost entirely blown out. I ran it through every FBI database from facial recognition, mug shots, surveillance feeds - Tom: Or I could just buy this boat, and we could disappear. Liz: Do you know how many images are in the NGI database? Tom: If we go away, none of that matters Liz: And not a single one of her. Tom: Reddington knows who she is. Liz: I know who she is. That girl - that’s me. And the woman - I believe that may be my mother. Tom: That mean Reddington’s your dad? Liz: No. My father died when I was 4, in a fire. Reddington was there. I think she may have been too. Tom: Why don’t you just ask him? Liz: If Reddington wanted me to know the truth, he would have told me by now. He wants to keep me from knowing, and he will bully anyone who might help me into silence. Tom: Well, that’s his tell - the silence. Berlin had me keep tabs on him, or try to. The mere mention of his name was like I’d asked for their first born. He thinks the fear protects him, but the fear he instills - silence can’t hide it. You can see it in their eyes. Whenever I did, I knew Reddington had been there. Liz: What? Tom: That stamp. The ring - I’ve seen it before. Liz: Where? Tom: Berlin. He wore a ring with that exact hallmark. It’s a Russian inspection stamp. Liz: You know people who worked with Berlin. You could reach out.

Tom: Did the same thing last month. It’s probably why you don’t recognize me. Constantin. Berlin, man, he’s tough. I had to get away for a while, go to Germany, figure a few things out. Constantin: I come here for the peace and quiet. Tom: Sure. Sorry. Gosh, you know, I just thought maybe you could help me. Man: He said to piss off, pal. Tom: Just take a minute. Constantin: I don’t know who that is. Tom: I think you do. Why don’t you take another look? Attendant: We got a problem. Liz: Let him go! You okay? Tom: Yeah. Liz: I believe he was asking for a name. Constantin: I can’t. I swore on my life I wouldn’t. Liz: You swore to whom? Son of a bitch. Tom: Who’s Bill Kershaw?

Liz: Where is it? I know it’s here. That’s how you knew I was here, how you knew I saw the picture. It’s why you threatened people. Where are you? Where are you? Where are you? Hello, Mr. Kershaw. I saw your name on the mailbox. I know you’re listening. You know how I know? Because this is where you keep all of your secrets. And you don’t want anyone finding those out, do you? Well, unless you answer my questions, I’m gonna find every last one. Red: Let me have your phone. You’ve made your point, Agent Keen. It’s time we discuss the photograph.

Red: The girl is you. And the woman is your mother. Liz: What was her name? Red: I knew her as Katarina Rostova. One of her many names. She was a KGB agent. Liz: The girl - the night of the fire, they called her - Red: Masha. You were born in Moscow. Your parents - uh, father and - they were both in foreign intelligence. Liz: You said she died of weakness and shame. Red: Yeah. Liz: You were there that night. I need to know what happened. Red: You want to know. There’s a difference. Liz: Dr. Orchard told me someone blocked my memory of that night. Was it you? Red: Yes. Liz: Why? Red: I’m not going to tell you. Liz: You have a picture of my mother in your weird, little apartment. Why? Were you in love with her? Is that why my father died? You killed him because you were in love with my mother. Tell me what happened. Please. Red: I’m not gonna tell you what happened, Lizzy. Liz: Then I’ll find out for myself.

2x21 -

Liz: There’s something I want to make clear with you. Red: Karakurt is known in the intelligence community as the left hand of the SVR. Liz: It’s not enough for you to tell me that my mother was KGB and that I was born in Russia. Red: In truth, he works for the Cabal. They smuggled him into America because they know if he commits an act of terror here, your government will blame Moscow. Liz: My mother and my father, who they are, what happened in the fire - I’m gonna find out the truth. Red: I’m sure you will, Lizzy. But listen to me. The Cabal is orchestrati - Liz: I get it. The Cabal is trying to start another Cold War, and an act of terror committed here is step one in making that happen. I am listening to what you are saying, and I know that it’s important, but it is no more important than what I am telling you, and I need you to listen to that!

Liz: Hey. Can you help me with something? Katarina Rostova - you heard of her? Masik: I don’t know who that is, but I doubt very seriously that that is Katarina Rostova. I don’t think there are any photographs of Katarina Rostova. Liz: Why do you say that? Masik: She’s a myth. Tall tales late at night over vodka shots. Probably an amalgamation of a half-a-dozen unknown female Soviet operatives - The Pinko Mata Hari. Liz: You said your CI works with the Old Guard. Could you ask him about her for me? Masik: If anybody knows anything about Katarina Rostova, he will. Send me a copy of your photo. I’ll see what I can do.

Liz: Reddington didn’t give it to me. I found it in one of the places he stays. Ressler: And you think this is a photo of your mother? Liz: I don’t know. That’s what Reddington told me. But that girl, that is definitely me. The agent back there, the CI he mentioned? That could be my chance to find out something about the woman holding me in that photo. Ressler: Why would a Russian CI have information about your mother?

Liz: I’ve got a lead on my mom. An Orea agent, he has a CI who might know something about Katarina Rostova. Red: Dr. Kimberly was a tenured professor doing genome research at Stanford when she was recruited by the private sector. Liz: I’m gonna find out the truth. Red: She makes her real money consulting. Costs a fortune. She did, however, let me name a lipstick color - “Fire In The Hole.”

Velov: The American government. They may not be done with me yet. I got a phone call from FBI. An agent named Elizabeth Keen. Red: Really? What about? Velov: She wants to meet. She was asking about Katarina Rostova. Red: Did you know Katarina Rostova? Velov: No, not personally. All I know are the same old ghost stories we all share. Red: Well, if you were in my employ, I would have to insist you not speak to anyone from the FBI or any other US intelligence agency. Velov: Of course. And Agent Keen, she wasn’t the first. Sometime back, two men from Justice Department come and ask me about Katarina. I suppose they think I am one of the few people left who still remember the old stories. Red: What sort of stories? Velov:They were asking about her KGB contacts, where she lived, and about a child. Red: They asked about a child? Velov: Yes, many times.”Tell me about her child.” I said, “All I know is they say she had a daughter.” Red: Dembe, the phone.

Red: Lizzy, you need to get out of there now. Liz: Why? Where are you? What’s going on? Red: You’ve been set up. The Cabal’s been asking about you, Lizzy. They know who your mother was. You’ve been set up. You were there when the Orea building was bombed. They wanted you to save Clifford Hawkins. They sent Karakurt to the memorial to make you think he was the threat so you would secure the Senator and infect him in the process. Liz: I don’t have the virus. Red: You do, Lizzy. I don’t need a test to know that you do. Your mother was a Russian spy, and now they’ve made it look like you are too. You have the virus. You infected the Senator, and now they will come for you. You need to get out of there now.

2x22 -

Liz: You were right. It’s all set up. Cooper and Connolly - I heard them arguing. He’s got it all figured out. He’s presenting evidence, using my mother, making it seem like all I’ve been doing is helping you commit crimes. Red: Lizzy, are you out? Liz: I’m leaving now. Red: Dembe’s on his way. As soon as you’re out, find your way to Illinois and Ridge. He’ll be there waiting. Liz: Yeah. Connolly: Hello, Agent Keen. We’ve been looking for you.

Interrogator: Cut the crap. We know who you are. Where were you born? Liz: I was raised in Nebraska. Interrogator: That’s not what I asked. You were born in Moscow. Your mother was a KGB agent named Katarina Rostova. Your adopted father had a criminal past you failed to mention. What is your birth name? Liz: What? Interrogator: Your birth name? For most people, that’s a pretty simple question. Liz: I never knew my biological parents, and my memories were blocked. Interrogator: You expect us to believe that? Liz: I don’t care what you believe. Interrogator: Intel indicates the existence of a Russian sleeper agent within the FBI. Liz: Then maybe you should go out and look for him. Interrogator: We know the truth, Masha. That’s your real name, isn’t it? Masha Rostova. Answer the question, Agent Keen.

Liz: Anton Velov? Agent Keen, FBI. We spoke briefly on the phone a few days ago. Velov: Keen. You were looking for information about Katarina Rostova. Is that why you’re here Liz: Not entirely, no. Velov: Good. Because if you were, you have wasted your time. As I told you, I never knew Katarina. Liz: I need you to tell me where I can find Leo Andropov. Velov: How should I know where he is? Liz: You were a CI for one of the Orea agents that died in the bombing. You recorded a conversation for him that took place here in this restaurant, and we know Andropov was a part of that conversation. So I’m gonna ask you again, where can I find him? Velov: There is a safe house in Ivy City. Liz: A safe house. An address? Velov: L Street, across from Olive’s Diner. Now, if there’s nothing else - Liz: That’s not what you told me on the phone. You said you could help me with Katarina Rostova. Velov: I don’t know anything. I told you how to find Andropov. Liz: And now I want you to tell me about her. Velov: I can’t say. Liz: First, you don’t know. Now you can’t say. Which is it?

Liz: You got to him. Red: I retained his services. Liz: In exchange for his silence about my mother. Red: Harold told me the man who infected you was the virologist Andropov. Liz: You got me out of the post office. You gave me a chance to prove my innocence. I know you think you care about me. But every time you do something that makes me think you really do, you do something else that reminds me that you simply aren’t capable of it. Red: I’m a sin eater. I absorb the misdeeds of others, darkening my soul to keep theirs pure. That is what I’m capable of. Liz: What sin of mine could you possibly have absorbed? Red: Andropov - do you have a lead? Liz: I do, and I’ll handle it on my own, because that’s what I’m capable of.

Liz: That’s everything! No! Oh, God! Stay with me! Come on! My mother - he’s the only one who knew about her. Tom: Liz - Liz, he’s gone.

3x1 -

Liz: If I didn’t know any better, I’d believe him. Red: But you do know better. Liz: They’re gonna believe I’m a Russian spy. My mother was a Russian spy. It doesn’t matter that I never knew her. It’s the perfect story. I’m the perfect patsy.

Liz: She was blonde. My mother. That picture in your apartment - she was blonde. I look like her, don’t I? Red: We are out of time. Liz: Is she alive?

Liz: When I was a little girl, I used to imagine that my mother was a prima ballerina who danced for kings and queens in London and Paris. And she only left me with Sam until she could come home again and sweep me away. I never would’ve imagined. What happened to her? My mother. Red: There was a time in my life when I was quite sure I knew exactly what happened to Katarina Rostova. But after all these years, I’m not sure I have any real sense of how or why she disappeared. Liz: Everyone talks as if she was a terrible person. Was she?

Red: Katarina Rostova was the cleverest, most resourceful woman I have ever known. Liz: What are you saying? Red: No matter how dark the moment, she could always find her way through. Liz. She was a Russian spy who I never knew. Red: No, you didn’t. But that doesn’t mean your mother is gone. I see her in you every day. She’s as much a part of you as the air you breathe.

Samar: All checkpoints just reported in. There’s no sign of her. Ressler: She didn’t get out. She’s gonna need a place to stay. Who’s gonna harbor an international spy? Samar: That’s it. A spy. Her mother was a Russian spy. Ressler: Son of -

3x2 -

Liz: He’s been turned. The Cabal framed me. Who better than the daughter of a KGB agent? Raskovich: Hmm. Katarina Rostova. Liz: A KGB agent was turned, but it wasn’t me. It was Karakurt.

3x5 -

Liz.: I lost my mom when I was a little girl. I know how you feel. Blair: You don’t. Liz: I still think about her every day - what we might talk about, what her voice might sound like. I promise you, I had nothing to do with your mother’s death. I will do whatever it takes to find the people responsible. But I can’t do anything until you take me off that site.

3x11 -

Red: The Cabal is in green. Their affiliates are in red. Their competition is in blue. Red: Since I’ve been a fugitive, the pestilence on this map has only grown. This is what we’re up against - a multi-headed hydra. You cut off one head, it grows two others, you have to cut off every head and burn the rest of it. It’s a mythic battle, and it’s not anywhere close to being over. Liz: It’s your battle, not mine. Red: I wish that were true, Lizzy. But the manhunt revealed certain facts that had long been hidden about you. Liz: Me? Red: Katarina Rostova was a name that had been lost to history. Masha Rostova was never more than suspicion and rumor. The manhunt and the publicity it generated changed all of that. Liz: But who would care that I’m Katarina Rostova’s daughter? Red: The daughter of a legendary spymaster, the secret-keeper who disappeared - Liz: Disappeared? You and Sam told me she’s dead. Red: The secrets she took with her could compromise any number of players on that map. They’ll be coming. They’ll be coming for you. Liz: But I don’t know anything. Red: They don’t know that. You can’t walk away, Lizzy. They won’t let you.

3x12 -

Red: Lizzy, I misspoke earlier about your child. I said that having it would be inconvenient. When your mother was pregnant with you, it was terribly inconvenient. The Cold War was ending. Her country was falling apart. Everything she had ever known. She dreaded having a child. Almost aborted it. Not one day of her pregnancy did she ever think of you as anything but a curse. And then, from the second you were born, there was never a day when she thought you were anything but a blessing. In my experience, there is never a convenient time to have a child. It certainly isn’t a convenient time for you. But if in saying that, I left you with the impression that I didn’t think you should have your baby, I’m sorry for that, because nothing could be further from the truth.

3x13 -

Liz: My mother - was she still alive when I was placed with Sam? Red: Yes. Liz; Why did she do it? Red: I let myself in because the situation is urgent. On Wall Street, a well-planned merger can return a windfall profit. Criminal enterprises are no different. The promnestria convinces sworn enemies that there is more profit in friendship. In return, he gets a percentage of the new venture. He only surfaces when he sees an opportunity for enormous financial gain. And I’m afraid he has resurfaced to unite two very lethal enemies. Liz: How did my mother die? Red: As I said, the matter is urgent.

Liz: I found a couple - to take the baby. Thinking about it is one thing, but actually doing it - How did she do it - my mother? Red: Your parents loved each other very much. The Cold War was hard -  too hard for your father. When the Soviet Union was collapsing, he took you from her. She gave up everything to follow him, to follow you. Liz: The night of the fire - that’s what they were arguing about? Red: Your mother, despite what he’d done, she wanted him back. She wanted them to be a family. As much as it pains me to say it, he was probably the only man she ever really loved. Liz: And I shot him. Red: It was an accident. Liz: Tell me. I need to know. Red: Your mother was never the same after that. The man she loved killed by the child she adored - it was just too much. Two months later, she went to Cape May and left her clothes on the beach, walked into the ocean and was never seen again. Liz: So, that night, I killed both my parents. Red: You were a child. There should never have been a gun for you to grab. Looking back, I’m not sure I shouldn’t have raised you myself. I don’t want you looking back with that kind of regret.

3x16 -

Liz: I just wish - despite everything she’s put me through, I wish my mom could be there. Cooper: Of course you do. That’s only natural. Liz: I mean, everybody has something to say about her. I just wish I knew the truth for myself, you know? Cooper: And you’re sure there’s no one who can help you find it? Liz: I tracked down this one man - Anton Velov. He said he didn’t know much, but I think he was holding something back. Cooper: Sounds like you should pay this Mr. Velov a visit.

Darla: Anton. Your guest is here. Velov: Thank you, Darla. Liz: Thank you for meeting with me, Mr. Velov. About a year ago, I came to visit you in your restaurant. Velov: I remember. You were asking about Katarina Rostova. Liz: That’s right. I was hoping you could answer a few more questions for me. Velov: She was just a name. One of many I heard when I was with Spetsnaz. Beyond that, I know nothing. Liz: Please. She was my mother. Velov: Dear, I cannot help you. I would if I could, believe me. I, too, have daughter. The life I led, the things I had to do, she won’t talk to me. I try to explain, but there are some - some things which can never be forgiven. Liz: I’m sorry, um - why did you agree to meet with me if you can’t help me? Velov: My daughter. I don’t know where she is. I am dying. I have written her this letter. You are with FBI, no? You can find her. Give it to her. Please. It explains everything.

Darla: He told her nothing. Red: You’re certain? Darla: He spent most of the time talking about his own daughter. Red: Thank you, Darla. Dembe: She deserves the truth. Red: Watch the road, Dembe.

Liz: My mother’s alive. You lied to me. Red: Velov is the one who lied to you, Lizzy, not me. Katarina Rostova committed suicide in 1990. Liz: Velov was the agent assigned to find her. He was getting close, she knew it. That’s why she allegedly walked into the ocean. She wanted the world to believe she drowned. Red: But Velov knows differently. Liz: He tracked her to a hotel in Prague. She had just left. But in such a hurry, she missed this - a photo of her little girl. Me. Red: That could easily have been planted. Liz: You said the name Masha Rostova had been lost to history until the manhunt. Now it’s out there, and someone’s looking for me. It’s my mother. Who else would care? Who? You were right. Some things can’t be forgiven.

3x17 -

Liz: Reddington. It’s her, isn’t it? Solomon’s employer. It’s my mother. Who else would call me Masha Rostova? Red: Lizzy, your mother is dead. Liz: Then who is it? Who? You owe me this. Red: I’ll tell you what I know as soon as I know you’re safe.

3x18 -

Liz: Reddington’s lying to me. I know it. If my mother wasn’t trying to abduct me, why’d Solomon ask for Masha? Tom: Do you really think this woman is gonna hire a team of mercenaries to kidnap her own daughter? Liz: If that woman knew Reddington, she would. She’d know it’s the only way to pry me out of his grip. But where’s she been all this time? And why’d Reddington say she’s dead?

3x20 -

Red: I was just imagining young Katarina covered in glitter. As an adult, it’s easy to dismiss this stuff as girlish frivolity. You forget the wonder it creates, the light captured, secret wishes evoked. It renders even the darkest days sparkly.

Red: I feel bereft, just like you. Dom: No, not just like me. She’s gone because of choices you made for both of them. First Katarina and then Masha. As far as I’m concerned, you killed my entire family! No, you’re not like me.

Tom: Liz was convinced that her mother was the one who tried to kidnap her. Reddington said she died years ago, but Liz didn’t believe that, and neither do I. I think we’re staring at Katarina Rostova.

4x1 -

Kirk: Listen. you were my entire life. You were all your mother and I ever cared about. Now you don’t know any of that because Reddington took you away from us when you were just a little girl. He and your mother had an affair. For a time, I thought maybe he was the father, but I have proof that he’s not. He’s just a spiteful, evil man. Couldn’t accept it when Katarina broke off the affair. One day I came home, and you were gone. He’d taken you. I never thought I’d ever see you again, until there you were - in the news, you and Reddington, the most wanted fugitives in the world.

4x2 -

Kirk: What’s the memory of a small child? You didn’t remember me or your mother or this room. Reddington lied to you, Masha. He told you your father was dead, but thanks to you - what you did on the water - I’m very much alive. All the stories Reddington’s told you about who he is and his connection to you - he knew you were looking for answers and he took advantage of that to re-enter your life. But the answers you’ve been looking for are here. Reddington, he was in love with your mother and he’s obsessed with you.

Katarina: There you are. Did you bring some treasures? Oh, these are beautiful! This is a time machine. One day you will come back here, open it, and remember me. Masha: Yes, Mommy.

4x3 -

Tom: Find anything? Liz: About Agnes? Maybe. About my mother? Definitely.

Red: Study date? Tom: This is what the FBI confiscated from Kirk’s estate. Red: Anything interesting? Liz: Yeah. My mother’s journal. She talks about you. About the affair. I’m up to the part where she writes about you pressuring her to leave her husband.

Katarina [Journal]: Seeing Masha with Constantin makes me think of my own father. I wonder what he would say now about the choices I’ve made. Look at me - in love with the man I was sent to seduce and betray. An American. Raymond wants me to run, take Masha and disappear with him, but how could I do that to her? She’s my entire life. She’s everything.

Liz: Reddington didn’t just have an affair with my mother. She was assigned to him, to be in his life - the way you were assigned to be in mine. Tom: For which I am forever grateful. Liz: Be careful, okay? I lost Agnes. I can’t lose you too. Tom: You haven’t lost her. When this is over, you’re gonna have both of us back.

Katarina [Journal]: Today, the doctor confirmed our worst fears. Constantin is going to need blood transfusions to raise his blood count. He’s known his whole life this day might come, but still it’s - it’s terrifying. The only blessing is that this accursed disease that has afflicted his family for generations is passed from father to son and that Masha is safe .... Masha.

Liz: I think I know why Kirk wanted that virus. I saw him getting a blood transfusion at Cape Breton. My mother wrote about his family’s history. Generations of Rostovs had the same disease - a rare blood disorder that’s been killing them for centuries.

4x4 -

Kirk: I see you’re wearing your mother’s bracelet. I’m glad.

4x6 -

Red: Any word from Kirk? Liz: You mean my father? Red: Honestly, Elizabeth, it astounds me that you could be hornswoggled by something as simple to fabricate as a DNA profile. Liz: Not just the DNA. It’s memories - places I recognize, things we did together. A time capsule we buried in the yard that no one else would know about. Red: Just because he was your mother’s husband doesn’t make him your father.

Liz: You know what’s gonna happen if I make that call. He’s the only one who can give me answers about my past, my mother. They’ll put him in a hole. I’ll never see him again. Tom: If you don’t, we may never see Agnes again.

Liz: Clearly your only concern is that it might actually bother me that I’m about to entrap my biological father, that because of me, he’s gonna go to prison for the rest of his life. If I go through with this, you will be my only link to my past. I lost Sam. I lost my mother. And I’ll lose Kirk. And whatever you want to call him, he was married to my mother. He raised me as a child. And he’s willing to do what you are not - tell me about who I am.

Kirk: There is no other way, solnishko. This man, that took your mother away from us, took you from me - he will not have my granddaughter.

4x7 -

Kirk: You remind me so much of her. Your mother. She was an amazing woman. I’ve been wanting to tell you about her. I thought we had more time. Liz: Whatever stories you have - Kirk: Not stories. Truths. About her and about Reddington.

4x8 -

Kirk: I don’t really know how we got here, Raymond. I remember being an honest businessman in a happy marriage until you came along. Red: Constantin, I can save your life. Kirk: Seduced my wife. To her credit, Katarina broke it off, but you couldn’t let go. Red: I have a cure. Kirk: I came home one night and they were gone - my wife, my child. Red: 202-555-0198. Kirk: My girl who’s not even my girl. Red: If you wanna live, call the number. Kirk: As you can imagine, I have many questions. Red: There’s a science. Some sort of genetics. It’s called CRISPR. Kirk: Your magic bullet to save my life is some experimental treatment they’re not even testing on humans. Red: CRISPR is not just experimental. Kirk: Gene re-sequencing may work someday, but I won’t live that long. Red: There was a breakthrough 19 years ago by a scientist who was murdered. His partner carried on his work on humans, not animals, with remarkable success. I have a doctor who can apply that science today. I can make her available to you. Kirk: And why would you save my life? Red: Because I want you to save mine. Call the number. Kirk: Because of my chronic illness, I’ve become something of an expert in pain management - what causes it, and what prevents it. Naturally occurring toxins, bacterial proteins, mutagens. I’m confident Mr. Kleeb can encourage you to answer some of my questions, Raymond. As I said, I have many. Now, let’s start at the beginning.

Kirk: I had proof that she was my daughter. A DNA test. Red: You saw what Katarina wanted you to see. She lied to you about everything. KGB trained her to seduce… foreign diplomats, intel - intelligence personnel - into - believ - revealing secrets. You always thought I was the interloper. The truth is that I was an assignment. I’m - I’m sure you were, too. Kirk: That’s a lie. Red: A cover then. You were wealthy and powerful. Gave her access. Kirk: All that matters is that we had a family, and you destroyed it. We had a daughter, and you took her from us. Why? Mr. Kleeb: If I dose him again, it could induce an Adrenergic storm. We could lose him. Kirk: Are you her father? Kirk: Are you her father? Answer me.

Kirk: Since we have a history together, I’ll give you the choice. Would you prefer to suffocate or to have a heart attack? Red: You’re not gonna kill me. Kirk: And why is that? Because that means I’ll die too? Red: Dying isn’t so bad. I did it once in Marrakesh. Kirk: Suffocation. You talk too much. Red: Perhaps I should listen more. Tell me about Katarina. Kirk: And why would I do that? Red: Because we both miss her. Because - after all these years - I have forgotten what she was - really like. Kirk: You remember what she did, and not who she was. Red: Remind me. Kirk: When - when we - when we first met, there was this house near where she lived, a case study house built by this famous mid-century architect. Over dinner one night, she said she wanted to look at it. I thought she meant look from the street. But when we got there, she jumped the fence. The lights were on. People lived there. She didn’t care. I stood there - frozen, angry, nervous. Then I felt - this rush of exhilaration. I climbed up, looked into the yard - and she was just - Red: Dancing. Kirk: Unafraid. Daring. Being. I’d never seen anything like it. She had - Red: A joy for living. Kirk: She was more alive than anyone I knew. When I heard she killed herself - I didn’t believe it. I still don’t. You’re wrong. I didn’t see what she wanted me to see of her, I saw her. And despite what happened, I know she loved me. Red: You don’t have to do this. Kirk: Raymond, there’s nothing in this world you can tell me to change my mind.

4x18 -

Kate: Your mother hired me to care for you. I promised her that I would defend you with my life. The reason I’m telling you this now is so that you’ll listen to me when I beg you - walk away. I gave the authorities enough to put him away forever. But you and your team must disavow any knowledge of the task force. Liz: So you served Reddington up on a silver platter to the FBI. You did that for me. Kate: Not you, Elizabeth. I’ve already failed you. I did it for Agnes. Liz: I can protect my own daughter just fine, thank you. Kate: Like you did today? What if I was one of Raymond’s enemies that would do anything to get at him? Please, do what your mother never had the courage to do until it was too late. Walk away from Raymond.

4x22 -

Kate: I’m sorry, Katarina.

Kate: I swore an oath to your mother I would protect you with my life. I fear I’ve failed you. Liz: What are you talking about? Kate: We’re at the end now, and I’m lost. Tired. I don’t know how to keep you safe. Liz: You don’t have to keep me safe. This could be over. It could stop. Kate: Masha, I can show you the truth. Liz: What truth? Kate: If you want to know why he came into your life - Liz: You’re scaring me. Kate: I can take you. We can go together. But it has to be your choice.

Liz: Kate, where are we going? Kate: I loved Raymond. And your mother. I loved her, too. Liz: This secret what Reddington’s hiding from me I think I know - Kate: Elizabeth, if you get out of the car, you choose Raymond. If you stay, you choose the truth.

Kate: I made a promise to Elizabeth’s mother to protect her girl at all costs. And I can’t do that from a cell - which is why I have a contingency plan. Isn’t that what you taught me, Raymond? Always make contingencies.

Liz: Mr. Kaplan was my nanny. Cooper: Somehow I’m not surprised. She loved you so much. Liz: And now she’s gone. Just like Sam. And my mom. Everyone who knew me best, knew the answers about who I was, where I came from.

Liz: What was it you said? A father who’s a career criminal and a mother who died of weakness and shame.

Dembe: Raymond, I’m not sure Elizabeth will ever be ready to learn about what you did to Katarina. Red: We gotta find that goddamn suitcase.

5x13 -

Dom: I wish I could help you. I can see that you’re a good person, kind - your eyes remind me of someone. Liz: You said you worked for Russian intelligence, so you knew operatives. Dom: Yes, but not Oleander. Liz: What about Katarina Rostova? Dom: Yes. Katarina. Yes, I knew Katarina quite well.

Dom: Her daughter? Masha? Of course. That’s who you remind me of. Ah, there’s such a strong resemblance. Liz: I never knew my mother. Dom: Ah, Katarina and I, we worked in the same building for a time. Ah, she was a legend already, even then. Everybody wanted to know her. Liz: And you were friends? Dom: I saw you with her once. She had to stop by the office for something urgent, and - and there you were, maybe 3 years old. Liz: Did you know Reddington? Dom: I don’t want to talk about Reddington. Liz: Why not? Dom: I just don’t. Liz: Do you think she’s dead? Katarina? I know they say she committed suicide, but there was a man, Anton Velov. He was a Colonel in the Spetsnaz. He said she might still be alive. Dom: I never heard from Katarina after she left for America. What really happened to her - I think there are some people who want to keep that information a secret. And I think they will do whatever is necessary even now to keep it that way.

6x1-

Liz: Our father, the real Raymond Reddington, cheated on your mother with mine - a Russian agent named Katarina Rostova. Jennifer: Our fake father’s a criminal, and our real one’s a snake. Liz: He took me from her in Russia. She followed him to America where we were staying. They got into a fight - a fire started - I got out, he didn’t.

Jennifer: So that’s why you were so sure about when he died. Because you shot him. Liz: They were fighting. My father and my mother. Screaming at each other. And others I think. He was hurting her. I saw the gun and I just wanted to make it stop. I’m so sorry. Jennifer: You were 4. You have nothing to be sorry about.

6x7 -

Red: You remind me so much of your mother. I don’t remember if I’ve ever told you that before, have I?

Liz: He said I reminded him of my mother. That’s what he said when I asked him why he gave us this case. Dembe: He’s right. You remind me of her too. Liz: You know everything. Don’t you? Everything about him. All the answers I’m looking for. Dembe: I do.

6x8 -

Marguerite: I never spoke to Mr. Reddington. Or the woman who arranged for him to have the procedure. Jennifer: A woman? What woman? Marguerite: Some Russian. I don’t know her name. Jennifer: Was it Katarina Rostova? Was that it? Was it Katarina Rostova who took Reddington to Dr. Koehler?

Jennifer: I talked to Marguerite Renard. She refused to say anything about Reddington, but she said there was a woman who arranged the surgery. Liz: What woman? Jennifer: A Russian. She wouldn’t confirm it. Liz: Katarina Rostova? She was there. My mother? Why was she there? That doesn’t - I don’t - I don’t und - Jennifer: I don’t know, but this - that woman, that nurse - She knew the name. I could see it in her eyes. Liz: That doesn’t make any sense. Why would my mother help some imposter - become Raymond Reddington? Jennifer: I don’t know. But Renard does. She knows more than she’s saying. You have to get her. And I can get us there.

Dembe: I acquired the package. Red: Did she say anything before you got there? To Jennifer? Dembe: Yes. That Katarina arranged the procedure. Nothing more. Red: That’s more than enough. You know what needs to be done. Dembe: There are alternatives. Red: There were before, not now. Not when she mentioned Katarina. Now Elizabeth will stop at nothing. Wherever we put Renard, she’ll be found, and she’ll talk. I’d do it myself if I could, but I can’t, and it must be done. Dembe: I understand.

6x9 -

Red: Agent Ressler. My goodness. After all these years, I feel as if we actually know each other. Ressler: I know the feeling. Red: Have you ever heard of Katarina Rostova? Ressler: Yes. She was a KGB officer. Red: Would it surprise you to learn that she and I had quite a complicated history? Sex, drugs, rock ‘n’ roll. Did I say “sex”? Sex. Ressler: Almost nothing you do surprises me. Red: How about that Katarina hid the fact that she was a KGB agent, stole the coordinates for the submarine U.S.S. Gideon, and passed them on to her superiors? That she, in fact, was responsible for the deaths of those brave young men? Sima: Objection. What surprises Agent Ressler is not relevant.

Red: You know what else is possible? That I was framed by Katarina Rostova, which I could prove if Your Honor would grant me even the shortest - Judge Wilkins: Alright, the court will stand in recess. During which time I will consider whether your willful disregard for my instruction suggests that while you are clearly competent to stand trial, you may be incompetent - to represent yourself.

Red: 35 years ago, a Naval intelligence officer working for the U.S. government fell -fell into a relationship with a beautiful Russian woman. Unbeknownst to his superiors, that relationship - which started as guarded attraction, quickly evolved into passion, which resulted in pregnancy. They had the child. A girl, whom they both loved. What the Naval officer didn’t know, but certainly should have suspected, was that the Russian woman was a KGB officer - that Katarina Rostova had been assigned to get close to Raymond Reddington and steal classified information from him. What Reddington could never have suspected, was that though she was a KGB agent, Rostova’s real handlers were members of a secret criminal organization, a multinational cabal working in the shadows to manipulate world governments, economic markets, trade, and international alliances. When Reddington discovered this, he confronted Rostova, who warned him that if he threatened to expose them, the Cabal would destroy his reputation, discrediting him so he could not discredit them. And that’s what happened. With the help of the Cabal, Rostova framed Reddington with the very evidence you’ve heard in this courtroom. To prevent him from protecting his country, she made it appear as if he had betrayed it. As a result, the Cabal remained in the shadows, Rostova disappeared, and Raymond Reddington became a completely different person. A man who has done many brutal, scary, illegal things. But not a single one ever that was treasonous.

Alan Fitch: They pulled me out of a meeting. This better be important. Katarina: Reddington knows. He knows everything. Fitch: Explain. Katarina: He’s discovered my identity. And the existence of the Cabal. Fitch: Can he be contained? Katarina: He took Masha. Fitch: Eliminate him. Katarina: He’s a decorated officer. His death would be investigated. Whatever they find, they will believe. But if we discredit him - The intelligence I stole - We leak that it came from him. No one will believe him after that. Not with the blood of 134 Americans on his hands. Fitch: Agent Rostova, I told you to eliminate him. Katarina: And I’m telling you there’s a better way. Fitch: Because you’re sleeping with him. Katarina: Because he has proof that the Cabal exists, proof that would be released in the event of his death. Fitch: The Fulcrum. Katarina: And because I love his daughter. My daughter. Fitch: I want this mess cleaned up. Get rid of him or ruin him. Just get it done by Christmas.

Red: Agent Ressler. Do you recognize the man’s voice on the audiotape? Ressler: Yes. It’s Alan Fitch. The former Director of National Intelligence. Red: And the woman? Agent Rostova? Ressler: It was Katarina Rostova, yes. Red: Why did you bring me this tape? Ressler: Because the government has a legal obligation under Brady v. Maryland to provide the defendant with any exculpatory evidence that can be used in the defense. Red: Thank you, Agent Ressler. And may I say you are both everything I dislike about the FBI and everything I admire about it? Nothing further, Your Honor.

Liz: Katarina Rostova gave that to you, didn’t she? She took Zachary from you. Minister D: You found the tape. Liz: You blackmailed the wrong person. Minister D: I thought I could use the tapes to punish people for what they’d done. Liz: To cash in on what they’d done. Minister D: To make a good living off the backs of bad people. Liz: You hurt a lot of people who deserved it. But you also hurt yourself. Minister D: No, I didn’t. Katarina Rostova did. Out of all the tapes, why ask me about this one? Liz: Because Katarina Rostova took someone away from me, too. Minister D: I’m sorry. Liz: So am I. Thanks to your tape - I think she just gave him back to me.

Liz: I don’t know how I can feel so relieved and so pissed off at the same time. Red: Don’t judge her too harshly. Liz: I don’t think I could judge her harshly enough. Whoever you are today, whatever you’ve become - It’s because of the lies she told. Red: She was between a rock and a hard place. Liz: That’s no excuse for framing someone for a crime they didn’t commit. Red: It’s easy to think that now. Back then - things were complicated. Liz: I grew up believing Raymond Reddington was a traitor. Red: Well, now you know the truth. Liz: I know a truth. Red: You know that your parents loved you very much. And that’s the only truth that matters.

Ressler: That must’ve been hard, hearing that tape today. Listening to your mother betray your father like that. Liz: To be honest with you, Ressler, this has all been hard. Ever since I met the imposter. But, yes, especially now, knowing that my mother helped this imposter steal my real father’s good name. Ressler: But why? I mean, before today, everyone thought Reddington was a traitor. The government, the press, and still, the imposter chose to take his identity. I mean, he went to a surgeon who could have given him the identity of anyone in the world. He could have been anyone. And yet he chose to be a pariah. He chose the life of a wanted fugitive. Why? Why would anyone do that?

[mariocki]

Six Plays by Alan Bennett: All Day on the Sands (1.6, LWT, 1979)

"Look at the level of that sauce. Only started yesterday, it's gone down dramatically. I'm under no compulsion to provide sauce. Lathering it on. It's not as if my cooking needed sauce!"

"Make it available on request. Sauce available on request, that'll bring them to a sense of responsibility."

"Wouldn't care, but they go at the salt and pepper like lunatics. You'd think they'd never seen a cruet in their lives."

[mariocki]

Play for Today: Hard Labour (BBC, 1973)

"I can't seem to get Mr. Stone interested in going away. He doesn't seem to like holidays."

"I expect he likes being at home."

"No, it isn't that."

[mariocki]

A Ghost Story For Christmas: The Ash Tree (BBC, 1975)

"I can scarce believe it. But what I have seen... I have seen."

[mbergansmile]

Gone wrong , Tom Holland Au.

Summary: What happened when It turns out that the guy who stole Y/n’s virginity is her best friends new boyfriend.

Paring: Reader x Tom Holland

Word counts : 1863 words

Warnings: Mentions of sex (No smut for now don’t know about the future. ). Swearing, lots of it. Shitty writing and miss spells.

It wasn't meant to go that way. She wasn't supposed to lose her virginity to some random at a club. She was supposed to loose it to him. Her boyfriend of 3 years who decided to not love her anymore. That's why she had been hanging out at the bar in the first place. Y/n had managed to catch the eye of a young fellow. His brown curls charmed her. Before she knew it she was making out with him in the taxi on the way to his place. Then everything had gone dark. Except she knew, the moment she woke up she knew what had happened. Even though the mind gap she felt it. Everything screamed SEX. She had looked over at him, which had hurt because of her minor hangover. Y/n was surprised that it had been so small giving everything. But she examined him carefully. Scanned his body for marks. It didn't take her long to spot them. The simple marks on his body were everywhere. " Fuuuck" she whispered to herself before climbing out of the bed. She couldn't be here. She had a relationship to repair and parents who probably missed her. Y/n checked her phone and saw that she had 15 missed calls altogether from,

mother

Kenzooo

Father

Love<3

She had some explaining to do once she got home. Before leaving this strangers apartment she decided to take one more look at him. He had been her first time after all. He looked sweet, innocent even. He had that spark that she had been looking for. The spark she already had but taken for granted. Why did she do this? Waste away something she could've had with someone she loved. Good things she'll never see him again.

6 months later.

Y/n couldn't believe that it had been 6 months since she broke it off with Conan. Shit wait, had it really been 6 months? Y/n pulled up her phone to make sure she had been right. Yeah, it really had been that long without him. She had 6 months to recover and still she hadn't. Her head was always there with him.

"6 fucking months, god damn it y/n pull it together " she whispered as she knocked on her best friends door.

4 months after y/n break up her best friend Mackenzie decided to get a boyfriend. Y/n felt like she had done it just to mock her. She soon realized she was wrong. Only because Mackenzie never let Y/n meet him.

" You'll just charm in into sleeping with you. I actually like him this time and I don't want him falling for you as soon as you meet. I need time" same exact answer every time she had asked. There were a series of histories where Mackenzie's boyfriends always fell for Y/n. She always managed to make them catch the heart-eyes around her. What Mackenzie never understood was that Y/n never felt the same. She never once liked them back until Conan. He had this way that made her smile and that had been it. They were quickly in love. Whatever that had been. Messy fights and bad break ups every now and then. After 3 years he had gotten enough. He couldn't take the fear of loosing her to another. She was to beautiful and people were falling for like flies. They went wherever she went. Random men and women would walk up to her and start flirt while Conan had been right there. Y/n never saw it, she never realized that they were flirting with her until Conan would storm out and yell at her for it.

The fight they had that night wanted to creep back into her mind. It wanted to play over and over but Y/n didn't let it. Today was about Mackenzie and her new interest. Y/n even dressed extra down today. Deciding to show up in flats and sweats. She went with grey sweatpants ands a black top. Nothing to flattering right. She even took her grandad's ugliest military jacket to top it all off. She still didn't realize that no matter what she wore she always pulled it off.

The door finally flies open and there stood a concerned McKenzie. Her eyes scanning her best friend up and down.

" Is that what you're wearing?" She asked. Her braids were in an half up half down doo. She was wearing an oversized sweater with biker shoes along with what Y/n figures was his zipper hoodie.

" You're wearing that, why can't I wear this" Y/n asked. She hadn't meant for it to sound so harsh but it's to late now.

" We've been together for 4 months. I think I'm good to go. You on the other hand is supposed to make a bad/ good impression on him okay?"

" okay" Y/n agreed. She just wanted to meet this guy.

They both stepped inside to the familiar home. Her best friend still lived with her mother due to complications with her landlord. She had to move back home and look for a new apartment. She followed Mackenzie into the living-room where he sat.

Seconds were all it took before her heart fell to the floor. Not again god damn it. This wasn't supposed to be about her. Today wasn't supposed to be about her. She was here to support Mackenzie and her new boyfriend. Just that the boyfriend happened to be the very same guy that she lost her virginity to.

Just play it cool, she thought.

Y/n walked over to him. She realized that she never caught his name. He probably must've mentioned it that night only for her to forget it the next day. She just remember it started with a T.

" Hi, Y/n" She said and put her hand out for him to shake. He hesitated, like he shouldn't shake a familiar hand. He soon gave in .

" Hello, Thomas but most people just call me Tom" He shook her hand and looked into her eyes. For a brief moment they were back in that bar 6 months ago. Talking and getting to know each other.

" okay, try not to have sex while I'm gone " Mackenzie spoke. Car Keyes high up in the air and her feet heading to the door. What when did she say she was leaving?

" You're leaving" Tom asked.

" I was going to make you guys something, but I'm missing some ingredients. I'll run to the store, it won't be long" and then she was out the door. Leaving both of them alone.

Bad idea.

What was she supposed to do? What was she supposed to say. She had been left alone in a room with the one guy she never thought she would see again. 6 months ago she went into that bar with the intent to let Conan go. She wasn't really supposed to loose her virginity there. But she did anyway and she did it with a complete stranger. The only reason she did it with a stranger was so that she wouldn't have to see said stranger again. Yet he's sitting in front of her with a smug look on his face. Is he amused by this? How could he? His girlfriend's best friend is.... well he didn't know what she would be to him.

" Stop looking so tense, chin up" He said and leaned back into the couch. Y/n huffed, she wasn't doing this. She wasn't talking to him like nothing happened. 

" What do you mean chin up? How am I supposed to chin in a situation like this" She snaps.For her entire life Mackenzie is all she's known. During her parents divorce Y/n lived with Mackenzie for months trying to avoid your parents. She continued to love Y/n despite everything. 5 is the number of boyfriends Mackenzie's had and 1 is the number of guys Y/n had fallen for. But all of them at one point or another fell for her. She never knew why, as hard as she tried it just kept happening. She melts feeling Mackenzie slip every time.

" please don't tell her" She pleads. Tom swipes his hand across his face before speaking.

" tell her what?" He knew what, he simply wanted to play with her head. Tom hadn't forgotten that night either. He had found himself the day after talking to his best friend Harrison about it. Saying how much he hated being left alone in the mornings. Not that it happened a lot just that one time.

" okay, act dumb but I know that you know exactly what I mean" Y/n walked over to the kitchen. Tom followed not long after.

" Shouldn't she know?"

" No absolutely not. She'll never speak to me again" Y/n tell him.

" she can't ever know that the guy I lost my virginity to is her boyfriend" Tom's eyes widened. He was honestly shocked.

" Virginity? I thought a girl with your personality had experience" He jokes. Smirking proudly.

" Don't look so surprised" She mocked and took a glass of water. Feeling the extremely cold water run down her throat. Calming her from whatever was going on.

“ I thought I was going to do it with the love of my life. Turns out he had others plans. So I was seeking attention from a cute stranger and that my dear friend was you... well at the time” She smirks taking another sip of her water. Where’s Mackenzie? Did it really take that long to get a couple groceries.

“ Noted, I’m sorry about that. I didn’t know” Tom apologized. His warm tone was reassuring to Y/n. He made her feel safe even for a moment. Besides how was he supposed to know? She never told him because he was just going to be a one night stand, not the boyfriend of her best friend.

That night wasn’t ideal for Tom either. He wasn’t big on one night stands. It was the coldness that came along with. No breakfast or lunch or even Dinner. Just sex and then silence. He hated that part, almost more than he hated being left alone. If he hated one night stands so much why did he engage? He never had a say sheathed or not it was a one night stand. Usually the women would just sleep with him and leave immediately. If he even tried to make them stay he would get shit down and that lowered his self esteem. How was he supposed to find “ the one” when girls left him right and left. Tom believed in love and marriage. He wanted that one person in his life that made him hear fireworks everyday. That would make his insides tingle with butterflies. Tom wanted that and he got that with Mackenzie. No matter His and Y/n brief history he wouldn’t leave her, Ever.

Or so he thought.

———-

This story is dedicated to @hollandroos she inspires me to continue writing. Idkkkk i just wanted to write for her. So this shitty story is for you Sophie xx

[mbergansmile]

Lights On

Paring: Female Reader x Tom

Song promt : Lights on by Shawn Mendes.

Summary : Tom is in love w/ reader and is to afraid to tell her. Until he’s faced between loosing her or telling her how he feels. ( also I realize this simply has nothing to do w/ the song but I loved it and this is the idea that came when I listened to it so enjoy. Ps I apologize that it’s so short)

There she walked in. In his chalk white shirt. She was to adorable, practically drowning in his clothes. The shirt was buttoned up and stopped right below her knees, showing her underwear clearly. Y/n walks over to the kitchen and opened fridge. Tom smiles at how she hadn’t noticed him looking at her yet or so he thought. Just then she turns around and look right at Tom “ hey you’re like out of everything you should go grocery shopping soon” She says and pours the milk onto the cereals. She grabs the bowl of cereal and sits down next to him. Tom and Y/n are best friends and have been for as long as they can remember. They met in grammar school. They would always force their mothers for playdates and mini sleepovers. Then they eventually grew up and went their separate ways. Y/n ended up at a collage in Washington majoring in creative writing. Tom went to Juliard school of performing arts majoring in acting and even filmmaking. Somehow they managed to find their way back to one another.

“ what are we watching doucheface “ she jokes still holding the bowl of cereal in her hand. Tom shrugs “ I just put something on” Tom shrugs leaving Y/n to roll her eyes at him. Tom continued to watch her as she brings the spoon to her mouth, the way her eyelashes flutters as she laughes. “ you’re doing it again” she said. Bringing her fingers to her ear so she can place the stroke of hair behind it. She keeps her eyes at the screen. Tom looks away embarrassing that he was caught watching her. If it isn’t already clear Tom likes y/n. He was going to tell her, he was going to but just then she started dating the asshole from east. Some guy who doesn’t know how to treat her right. He would never go away. Always showing up wherever they hung out. By the diner, Tom’s flat , he was always there. But that stopped when Y/n caught him cheating and left him for good. That had been just a week ago.

It has been a little bit over a week since she found him cheating. A little bit over a week since she got her heart broken. Y/n stayed at Tom’s place after everything. She couldn’t stand the thought of being in that apartment where she got her heart broken. So Tom took her in and out of respect Tom put off telling her for a little while longer. Yet here he was starring at the TV screen trying his hardest not to kiss her. “ you were just starring at me” She turns to face him. Tom shalwar his head. “ no I wasn’t” a simpler reply couldn’t be spoken.

“ okay, is it something a have on my face” She asks. Tom keeps quiet. If he opens his mouth and speaks he know that he might tell her. He might blurt the last thing she needed to know. “ no you don’t, I was just frozen that’s all.” He forced himself to say. She finally gives in and takes a bother sooon full of cereal.

A couple episodes (of whatever it was that you guys where watching ) later Y/n puts her empty bowl down on the small table beside the sofa. Her breathing quicken and she stands up. She had put this conversation long enough “ Hey um” she starts and grabs Toms attention.

“ I um- wow I didn’t know how dumb this is going to sound” she says. Tom begins to grow equally as nervous.

“ I have decided to talk things out with Darien. I might’ve agreed to move back in with him”

She tells him. Tom felt his heart sink. The weight of losing her one more time to that scumbag was unbearable. He couldn’t move ”w-what? But why? Y/n don’t please” He tries. He knew that if he didn’t tell her now he might not ever tell her. If she went back to him then he might ever get her back. Without thinking Tom grabs her by the waist and kisses her softly. He hadn’t planned any of it. He wasn’t going to tell her today.

“ Tom I” but Tom didn’t want to waist any more time. How could he? He’s been waiting for years to tell her and now he finally can. All it took was for her to slip far enough and suddenly he had the courage to kiss her.

Their lips move in unison and the bittersweet aftertaste from the cereal was exploding in his mouth. His hand helped her lay down. Y/n didn’t know exactly how to feel. She was kissing her best friend while in somewhat way going to go see her ex. To many things where going on in her mind. She wrapped her legs around his waist and held onto him. The sunlight beaming through the white curtains. He wasn’t going to tell her, He hadn’t planned on telling her. He had planned on waiting, planned on making a big deal out of it. He was going to take her to their favorite place and reenact one of her favorite scenes from Pretty in pink.

Now he was kissing her like he’d never kissed anyone before. Tom traces the outlines of her body, his fingers are trembling because of the nerves.

He loved everything about her body. Every stretch mark and every flaw. The light were guiding him as he traces his lips down her stomach.

“ Thomas” she pushes him off of her.

“ I can’t do this, I simply can’t do this” they both sit up.

“ Why? Why can’t we just..” y/n cuts him off

“ Tom you know I love you, you’re my absolute best friend and I appreciate what you have done for me I really do. But..” she really didn’t have to finish, Tom did it for her.

“ you still love him” It was already to late. Tom thought that a singel kiss would change everything, he’d finally get the girl.

She doesn’t answer his statement. She simply just grabs her phone and walks out the room. Only to reappear a couple moments later fully clothed and ready to head out the door. Just as she’s about to leave she turns her head and looks at Tom” Look, maybe in another world you and I would be. Maybe if I wasn’t such an idiot to choose him over you I won’t get my heart broken again. I promise you this Tom i Will never ever bother you again. I don’t want you break your heart like he broke mine” she walks over and plants a kiss on his forehead.

Just as the door closes Tom utters “ What if my hearts already broken?”

She left, leaving nothing but the lights on.

For Soph: @hollandroos

[mbergansmile]

When Y/n met Tom

One

The story and cast for it is on my Wattpad

Warnings: Idk honestly maybe some minor cussing.

Paring: Tom x Female! Reader

—————————-

“ What, can’t a man just enjoy the sight of his lover in the morning?” Y/n rolls her eyes. He knew the rules. ” Tommy” She says with pitty in her voice.

“ You know the rules!” Tom rolled his eyes before getting up.

“Look okay I didn’t mean to stay the night but it just sort of happened “ he explains before moving closer to her, trying to kiss her shoulder, but fails. Was it all it was? Just sex?

“Don’t let it happen again Alright“ her tone harden.

“ yeah, sure” he said .

“ I gotta go , The Chief Of staff wants to have a fucking meeting and I am so so late” she tells him before getting herself dressed. Tom doesn’t say anything

“ y/n can we-“

“ Later okay, there is a spare key under the doormat and you’re welcome to stay and help yourself to breakfast but you better be gone when I come back from work” Y/n rushed out the door, quicker than Tom could utter her name.

When Y/n met Tom everything changed. Her intention at first was to use him to get to her boyfriend jealous and angry. At the time Tom was unaware of her intentions but as you all know it was only a matter of time before he found out the truth. Thought did he too leave out a detail about his intentions. Tom was using Y/n as a rebound from his crazy ex and they both just realised they could benefit from it.

To prevent feelings from getting involved they came up with a set of rules.

Y/n only cared about one rule and that rules was that there not to be any strings attached. That brings us to the present with Tom listening to the light click that the door made as she closed it. He puts his shirt on and looks around the room for a little while. He thought since she offered so ‘ kindly’ he would take her up on her offer and stay. He couldn’t recall a singel time him and Y/n had a serous conversation, breakfast or even a walk in the bloody park. They’ve come close a couple of times but Y/n has always finds a way not to let him in. Tom had started to have feelings for y/n early on. To afraid to loose her he decided to keep them to himself. She was to distant and to consumed with work. There’s always something she has to do that makes her leave in such a rush.

Tom grabs one of her pictures and takes a long look at it. It was a photograph of y/n and her mother, they were hugging and smiling. She looked so different, happy. The y/n he knows is angry and angsts all of the time. Tom kept looking around in her room. The light from the sun kept him from crawling back into her bed. “ I wish she would just stay for one moment” he said to himself.

Tom opened the bedroom door. He casually walked out of the room and into the kitchen.

Just as Y/n enters the diner her phone rings. She looks down and sees that it’s Tom. “ yeah?” She breathes

“ hey yeah, I just um... I “ Tom stutters

“ what Tom, get to the point” Y/n throws her stuff into her work locker, making a loud thud.

“ I just thought you should know that you’re officially out of milk” he explains

Y/n sight loudly “ Anything else!l?”

“ no, oh- I made pancakes if you want some when you get home?” Tom could practically feel the eye roll as he realized how dumb he sounded.

“ yeah thanks” she hangs up.

Y/n continues out the staff room “ Hey I’m here” she exclaims while putting her hair up. She felt the glares as everyone looked at her. There was no staff meeting, she simply needed an excuse to get away from Tom. She didn’t like the way he’d been acting lately, she felt almost clustered like he was suffocating her. He had started to stay the night, making food for her and even come over whenever he felt like it. She grew annoyed and in desperate need of separation from him. Sure felt a little bad for using him but to her excuse he was in on it.

” what do we got?” She asked the cashier “ 3 coffees , two with milk and one black” She tells Y/n. Y/n nods “ table?” She asks

“ 3” The cashier said and went back to whatever it was that she was doing. Y/n grabs the the muggs filled with coffe and brings it out to table 3. When y/n arrives she notices that the people sitting at the table are friends of Toms. They all smile as they too notices that it’s Y/n.

Zendaya, Jacob and Harrison are all seated at table 3. In an attempt not to talk to them Y/n simply hands them their drinks with a soft fake smile “ 3 coffees, 2 with milk and 1 black “ she simply tells them. Just as she’s about to leave Zenday tells her “hey you’re Tom’s girlfriend right” y/n cringe at the word, girlfriend? Where had she gotten that from? Y/n certainly wasn’t anyone’s girlfriend and definitely not Toms “ no, we’re just friends” Y/n explains hoping that they all just leave it at that “ oh but I- “ Y/n cut her off “Whatever it was that he told you guys it’s not true. I lied earlier we’re not friends we’re more like two random people who happen to know each other” Zendays cuts Y/n off

“ Yeah, that sounds a lot like friends to me”

“Wrong, just because you know of each other doesn’t mean that you’re friends”Jacob corrects. Zendays rolls her eyes before giving her attention back to Y/n.

“Anything else I can help you ?” Y/n spoke sarcastically. Her tone deepened as she tried her hardest not to go right back behind the counter and give the table to someone else. Her breathing increased as she waited impatiently for a reply.

Zenday, Jacob and Harrison looks over the alternatives that they have. Y/n was going to kill Tom. Has he seriously been going around telling his friends she was his girlfriend. Y/n? Who has tried her hardest to show Tom that she wanted nothing more than just sex, yet he kept showing up and staying the night, if she didn’t know better it’s almost like they’re in a relationship.

“ yeah now that I come to think of it we’d like a whole bunch of pancakes sent to us just like a lot cause ya know we’re” her tone had changed. She went from happy and chipper to something completely different. Y/n hates it but at the same time sort of liked it.

“ was that it?”

“ Yeah, you may leave now”

Y/n rolls her eyes dramatically before leaving. Why couldn’t her first costumer be some she didn’t have some weird connection to. She turns her heals and walks back to the counter. Her eyes glued to the path she was walking in. She was enters the kitchen and calls out the order ”stack of pancakes for table 3” she says. Her eyes go back to the table where Tom’s friends are seated and she watches as they drink their coffee and chat.

Y/n walks back into the lockers. Just as she reaches inside her bag she can hear the faint noise from her ringtone. It was Tom calling, again. It couldn't have been more than half an hours since last time ” Hey” she speaks into the phone.

” hi, um I decided to go grocery shopping for you since I feel bad that I finished up all of your milk and stuff” Y/n couldn't help but chuckle. Even if she was annoyed with him she still needed that laugh

”hey, so your friends are here ” Her voice was soft. Tom was silent for a couple moments. There was something about the way he went silent that scared her.

“ Shit” he whispered, it was clear that he didn’t want her to hear that.

“ what? Tom” Her voice became stern again.

“ I sort of ish, might have told them where you worked. I just” She cut him off. The anger started to bottle up inside her

“ What?”

“They wanted to see if you were real. I don’t..they just didn’t believe me..I’m sorry” He sight. Y/n didn’t know what to say. She was lost for words. What had there been to believe? What was he going around telling people? Was that the reason for Zendaya’s sudden change? Honestly all she wanted was for someone to be honest “What wouldn’t they believe Thomas?” Using his name as a threat. She rarely called him Thomas, but whenever she does it’s because she wants to bring a point across or to show him she’s mad. Y/n didn’t have an issue with his friends being there, the issue had been the whole girlfriend fiasco and the fact that they started to embarrass her at work. Maybe people didn’t catch the memo but she knew what Zendays was doing. She knew that all she was doing was to protect her friend but Y/n just wasn’t in the mood.

” Can we not do this over the phone? Later alright?” He asked her

“ No, Valencia is picking me up after work” She says mater of factly. Like it was something that Tom should have known about it. Y/n was going to see Valencia and the others, including Wyatt. Valencia has been planing a going away party for Flynn. Tom sights with clear disappointment.

“ Fine whatever, but I just think we should talk whenever you have time Alright?” He asked.

“ Yeah-Yeah “ Y/n double talk, hanging up the phone and walking back out. Zendaya and the others are still sitting by the table. Casually eating and drinking their coffee. Annoyance filled her whole body. Y/n could help that she was emotionally detached from other people, the other people being Tom. What happened between her and Wyatt was bad and never to be repeated. She fee deep in with him and it nearly cost her everything. It didn’t matter anymore who she loved, she had to keep a distance and Tom was her solution to that.

Besides Tom was getting over and ex as well. Some upperclass brat who couldn’t have given less shit about him. Y/n had heard him talk about her on the many occasions when she fake slept to get Tom to leave early. He had stayed up for hours telling about thing he’d never have the balls to say to her face. Like shit about his ex, the fucked up things she said and did to him. Y/n came close to responding to Tom multiple times. But she refrained. She didn’t want him thinking the wrong things. The multiple times he had cried next to her thinking she wouldn’t hear anything, then getting his stuff and leave. Y/n had to admit it was sad. Tom was a good guy and he didn’t deserve to be treated the way his ex or Y/n herself was treating him. His sweet innocence could break at any moment.

There she was though. Sitting with Two of his best friend judging Y/n for her relationship with Tom. It pisses her off whenever someone tries to butt in on Y/n business. Her anger fades away when Jasmine Hart approaches her. Her long blonde curls swaying as she made her way over. Jasmine Hart, she and have worked Together for 4 years now. Jasmine is the light of the cafe, with her constant singing and flirting. She has quite a huge following at the cafe , regulars who specifically wanted her. The two became close after a customer got a little to handsy with Y/n and Jasmine came to the rescue.

“ I apologize for that asshole, sincerely. He always comes around the diner pulling shit like that. Like this place looks like a brothel” She had said. Immediately bringing light back Into the room. Y/n smiles at her work-bestie.

“ Stuck up rich kids” she eyes table 3. Y/n snort “ Something like that” y/n agrees. Tom and his friends were from the other side. They were something out an episode of gossip girl. “ I heard that they’re your table?” Jasmine asks. Y/n nods.

“ I feel sorry for you, you know what, let’s spit on their food that oughta teach them sometin’ “ again Y/n laughs and almost immediately catches a glare from Zendaya.

Jasmine always made everything better.

“ So you going to the Flynns tonight?” Jasmine asks.

“ yeah, Let’s be honest thought, it’s more Valencia’s party than Flynn’s “ Y/n tells jasmine as her bright white smile appears.

They both chuckle at their friend.

“Y/n” one of the cooks call. He hands out a plate full with pancakes along with a sticker that says 3. Y/n sights and grabs the plate “ ha, remember what a said, spit darling spit” Jasmine gives a another warm smile before going into the staff locker room. Y/n sights, as much as she’d want to she couldn’t spit on their food. She places it down before turning her heals “ Hey Y/n” Zendays calls. Y/n could practically feel herself wanting to fold 12 times until she could see the stars.

“ Look I realize I came off as a bit hars earlier, you know I only care about Tom and after Alicia he wasn’t himself. Then you came around and he came back to us. Now I find out that he has only been making that up in his head so he can forget about her. I’m sorry you got dragged into it and I’m really sorry for my behavior earlier and I will talk to Tom” She tells Y/n. She really hadn’t expected that from Zendaya. She wasn’t wrong though, Tom had been telling himself thing but why about Y/n? He has gone on numerous dates since they started and he even came close to ending things between me once.

“ it’s fine” Y/n fake smiles.

“ Not it’s not and I am sincerely sorry for my behavior” Without thinking she hugs Y/n. She barley knew how to react, minutes ago she had thought about spitting in their food and not they were hugging each other. Surprised Y/n just stands there. Harrison and Jacob was also just sitting there, equally confused about the whole situation as Y/n. Zendays finally lets go and sits back down “ Oh and it’s enough pancakes for us” she lets out a small laugh before going back to conversation with Harrison and Jacob.

Y/n walks back to Jasmine who is practically on the floor laughing her ads off. Y/n rolls her eyes and she watches as Jasmine recovers from her laugh attack. Her blond hair almost falling out of her bun.

“ Oh god can this day just be over”

” Why? It's barley getting started”

[mbergansmile]

Study break 🍯

[mariocki]

Scorpion Tales: Killing (1.2, ATV, 1978)

"Have you ever bothered to work out how much you're worth, Mrs. Fredricks? Have you? How much you can earn in a lifetime? I have. The average bloke works forty-five years, earns just under a quarter of a million pounds - a quarter of a million pounds! Now, if they were to give you that sum on your first day of work, and you agreed to work for them for nothing, you wouldn't have to go to work at all, would you? You could invest it, and you'd get twenty-five thousand pounds a year minimum, which is five times as much as you'd get if they paid you! Funny, isn't it?"