#congrats hyv

[emanation-aura]

can i ask for your rant on Genshin regional specialities? your meta on the bosses was very entertaining, and i largely agree–although i do have to argue that the ruin serpent is worse than the wenut in the spiral abyss

(Meta on boss drop bloat in Genshin)

Ok, well don't say I didn't warn you, anon.

Regional specialties suffer from the same problem as the boss drops as we always need to have at least one or two per expansion, and that as the expansions have gone on, the drops have become more and more mismatched. I mean, I have problems with some of the Liyue characters' regional specialty assignments too, but I'll deal with them too.

I'm gonna address them region by region.

(Highlights: Chongyun why do you use Cor Lapis, Dendrobium Chiori but she doesn't seem to be killing people?!, Thoma you poor soul on Fluorescent Fungus, Navia using Primordial Water, the thing she nearly died to—)

Liyue

Here is the current canonical list of who ascends with what in Liyue. Besides the obvious paradigm of why Gaming, a Pyro Vision user, is ascending with the Starconch (which has, for literal years, been a Childe and then Childe + Yelan exclusive, making it pretty much "Hydro Liyue ascender" for everyone released after 1.0, plus it's also literally a conch from the ocean, the theming—), I actually have more issues.

Chongyun using Cor Lapis, for instance. Like, let's look at the other two characters that use Cor Lapis: ah right, Zhongli aka Rex Lapis the (former) Geo Archon, whom this ore is named after, and Keqing, relentless driver of an ideal of change for Liyue Harbour, who is so dedicated to the idea of Liyue she is willing to blaspheme its Archon to do so. Both of these people, in very different ways, hold a great love for Liyue and wish to see it prosper.

Chongyun doesn't have this. It's not like he's disloyal or hates Liyue Harbour, but it's not a focal point of his character. He's more along the lines of Xiangling and Xinqiu as passively treating and treasuring Liyue as his home, but he doesn't carry the strong convictions that the Cor Lapis (lit. "Stone Heart") implies, at least not in the direction of Liyue Harbour. His character is all about his yang spirit and exorcism,

Honestly, I know it's not a regional specialty, but Chongyun would theoretically make the most sense ascending on Mist Flowers. Beyond that, my opinion is that he suits Qingxin more— like, come on, Qingxin (清心) means "pure heart" (or "mind cleansing"), and what's Chongyun's most famous motto? That's right, "Heart be pure, evil be erased. Mind be purged..." (and, via Shenhe, "world be saved").

Note: Ok, now the Chinese version of the motto is obviously very different, which might affect my argument. Combining what Shenhe completes for us, the motto is:

驅邪縛魅，內外澄清，回向正道，保身護命。 To expel evil and restrain demons, inside and outside pure and clear, turn back towards the upright Way, protect life-destiny and guard the body.

Translation courtesy of this site, since these mottos are based on the Eight Great Incantations in Daoism, specifically the "purifying the heart incantation" and "pacifying the earth incantation".

But I'd argue this makes the Qingxin argument even stronger. First of all, it straight up uses 澄清 chengqing "pure and clear", the same as the 清 qing in Qingxin. Second of all, the Daoist chant this comes from is the 淨心 jingxin "purifying the heart" mantra, like come on, I don't have the energy to explain even further how this suits him. Plus, the Qingxin description says "It eschews the warmth and moisture of the plains to gaze out afar from the solitary mountaintops." Apart from applying to the three (pseudo-) Adepti very well, doesn't this perfectly describe Chongyun's character struggle? Having to deny the warmth of life and keep himself cold (physically, mostly) and under control so that his yang spirit doesn't lose control??

Like, I know Qingxin is somehow the 'adepti' ascension material (excluding Xianyun and Yanfei, because Qingxin only applies to adepti/adjacent who don't really fit into the mortal world), but Chongyun fits this too well, and he can join his aunt Shenhe in using it too.

Other sins of Liyue ascension materials: ok, this one is less egregious, but I feel like Xinyan deserves Jueyun Chilli and not Violetgrass. Like, I get that the description of Violetgrass says it has a "strong vitality" and that its "downward-blooming flower keeps its fragrance from dissipating", both traits that reflect Xinyan's rock'n'roll persistence and her character, but Violetgrass is also a medicinal herb both factually and given that Baizhu and Qiqi both use it, so it's sending out mixed messages here. If anything, Xinyan suits Jueyun Chilli as well for being the "kick up the ass" for Liyue traditionalists (paraphrased but the sentiment is there). I'm not as sure on this one, since Jueyun Chilli also doubles as "Madam Ping's disciples' ascension material" with Yaoyao and Xiangling, but it doesn't even make sense for Yaoyao, swap her with Xinyan since Yaoyao is a healer and takes care of people and would make more sense ascending on a medicinal herb.

There's also, glaringly, the issue with Clearwater Jade and Xianyun being its only user. This has an easy hotfix: remember my problem with Gaming? Let him use Clearwater Jade instead for Chenyu connections, therefore fixing the 'there's literally only one user of this ascension material' problem. I know it's Clearwater Jade and Gaming is Pyro, but at least he has a lore connection to Chenyu Vale.

Speaking of the 'only one user of this ascension material' problem...

Inazuma

Q: Thoma, why the fuck are you the only one to use Fluorescent Fungus??

A: Because Thoma released in 2.2, just like Tsurumi Island.

There are two ways we can go about hits. First, we scrap the Fluorescent Fungus entirely and move Thoma to a different ascension material. The question is, which one? None of the others really have an MO that fits Thoma...

at least, in Inazuma.

Remember, Thoma is half-Mondstadtian. And if we wanna bend the rules a bit (or, in fact, actually give this half of his heritage some weight rather than just ignore it), why don't we give him a Mondstadt regional specialty?

Let's take Fluorescent Fungus' description. "A mushroom that glows like a night-light... [and] can help to light the way." Great, so we're dealing with only one theme here: bioluminescence and 'lighting the way in the dark'. Thoma has a Pyro Vision and works as a retainer for the Kamisato Clan, this isn't too strange. Hey, wait, isn't there also a bioluminescent plant from Mondstadt?

Small Lamp Grass: "A wild grass that emits light at night. Used in cooking to enhance other flavors. Just as the subtle fragrance of wild flowers will not distract a focused person, Small Lamp Grass' delicate glow will not attract their attention either, even at night."

Thoma could use Small Lamp Grass as a substitute, which three other characters already use, therefore reducing the amount of regional specialty bloat and making farming him not contingent on completing the Tsurumi Island questline, (which can be a good or a bad thing depending on what type of player you are), but as his """intended""" playstyle was a Hu Tao shielder at his release, the Lamp Grass choice also makes strategic sense since a Hu Tao owner will have likely already gotten a lot of Lamp grass by being in Mondstadt already, versus having to explore all of Inazuma. Plus, the Lamp Grass has an even better theming boon: "used in cooking to enhance other flavors" (like as a retainer, Thoma enhances the Kamisato Clan by his dedicated service).

If you wanted to play up Thoma's nostalgia for his homeland, you could make him use Windwheel Asters, which cannot grow in places with no wind or plagued by strong storms, only where the wind is gentle and nourishing. Inazuma, literally surrounded by a strong storm due to the Sakoku Decree and ravaged by the storms of war (metaphorically), would not be able to grow the Windwheel Aster until after the events of the Inazuma AQ and Raiden SQ II (assuming, for the sake of it, that Windwheel Asters can theoretically grow outside Mondstadt), reflecting how Thoma is stuck in a 'windless land' antithetical to his very nature. Big sad. I wish this was touched on more often, but that's an Inazuma critique, not just regional specialty reorganisation. And believe me, if I got into the Inazuma problems (as I have done in the past) we would be here all week.

The other option is not to scrap the Fluorescent Fungus, which in that case, someone else should use it. The only obvious candidate are our two new Inazuma releases: Kirara and Chiori. Out of the two of them, I think Chiori doesn't deserve Dendrobium, because it's such a reference to the red spider lily and death that even Chiori, who has her 'dark side' (being a blunt communicator??) doesn't exactly fit its MO. I mean, Sara is a war general. Of course she gets Dendrobium the flower that grows where blood was spilled. If Kokomi were a more competent character she would get Dendrobium too— *gets shot*

but it's hard to make a case for Chiori using Fluorescent Fungus unless you lean really hard into it being the "Inazuma outcast ascender", i.e. Thoma, a non-(full)-Inazuman living in Inazuma (everyone treats him considers him a 'naturalised' foreigner despite being half-Inazuman because that's the inevitable consequence of not being the picture of conformity in a society like this, trust me, I know the feeling), and Chiori, an Inazuman not living in Inazuma. The bioluminescence angle could also reflect Chiori's aspirations to become a fashion industry leader, like "the light shining in the dark", something like that. Alternatively, Chiori could use Amakumo Fruit, which fits her MO far better: "as if showing its defiance, it will bear fruit while facing the peals of thunder from the sky." Chiori is determined and defiant of the odds to achieve her dream, a "bold spirit" (quote from the desc.) for someone who emigrated and is struggling to make her life out there.

Kirara doesn't suit Amakumo Fruit either, given what I've described of it. She's neither 'defiant' (in the way that the description implies) nor strongly Electro-tied, she's just an international cat courier. That's why Fluorescent Fungus could suit her more— like, the luminescent angle lighting the way (through the fog of Tsurumi Island), just like her traveling self. It's not a deeply strong connection, but it tracks better than Amakumo Fruit does.

(Moving Chiori and Kirara away from Dendrobium and Amakumo Fruit respectively means that we're only moving the 'one character one material' problem, but given how well those two suit Sara and Raiden respectively, I'm loath to move or delete one of them. The ideal balancing factor would be moving Kirara to Fluorescent Fungus and Chiori to Amakumo Fruit, leaving Dendrobium with a single but extremely fitting user, which is more than Thoma + Fungus can be.)

Also, Yae Miko not ascending on Sakura Blooms is a sin. Swap Miko and Ayato (like, Ganoderma lore is literally the souls of dead children, what better way to imply further darkness in Ayato raising child soldiers in the Shuumatsuban especially given this is a criminally overlooked aspect in his character). Hell, if this aspect was further emphasised in Sayu's character, we could move Sayu to Dendrobium too, move Aloy literally anywhere else don't you think the Subdetection Unit, Trishiraite, or any other ore/mechanical thing would suit her more, time of release be damned??, and scrap Crystal Marrow. But that's getting dangerously close to talking about an Inazuma rewrite again, so I'll leave it there.

Hey, wouldn't it be really fucked up if Kokomi used Crystal Marrow to ascend? HYV, you cowards—

Sumeru

(Warning! I am going to be factoring the ascension material of Sethos, who was recently drip-marketed for 4.7 and hails from Sumeru. This is minor leak territory, but if you don't wish to see it, skip the section double-labeled Sethos at start and end.)

Sumeru is an interesting case because a lot of the regional specialties do clearly fit well, but at the same time are organised weirdly. I won't get into Collei and Wanderer using Rukkhashava Mushrooms because those, while weird on the surface, there is an interesting explanation behind it (ft. Ashikai's video on Eucharist lore) that coheres well. Nor will I take issue with Kaveh and Mourning Flower, since it's so clearly themed around the Iranian cultural significance of the Kaiser's Crown and dovetails with Kaveh so well, so we can let his single usage of it slide.

My first issue is with Sand Grease Pupa on Alhaitham and Dehya. Alhaitham does not really fit Sand Grease Pupa. Like, I will hear the argument that the description "the hardened shell is meant to protect the Quicksand Eels' larval bodies until they finally acclimate to the conditions of the dry desert" is a subtle reference to Alhaitham's character and temperament, where his """"callousness""" and blunt personality are a method to enforce boundaries and keep the personal peace he strives for in life amidst the sea of uncertainty. But the thing is that doesn't hold for Dehya, who also uses Sand Grease Pupa and doesn't have this kind of thing unless you count her being a hardened mercenary? Which is incredibly strange.

But things are complicated by the fact that there is no satisfactory place to move Alhaitham, unlike previous occasions where we found better places for Chiori and Kirara, etc. Like, I've tried my best, but against all odds the quote I mentioned from Sand Grease Pupa is the only one that remotely seems to work for him, and that's even if I ignore release order and consider Trishiraite or Mourning Flower.

So I feel compelled to keep Sand Grease Pupa. In that case, let's eject Dehya from using it, because it clearly doesn't fit her apart from the desert origin, which isn't even consistent because of Alhaitham. I'll talk about where Dehya should go in a moment, but now we have the problem that Alhaitham is the only user of the Pupa, which is something we try to avoid unless the theming is strong enough (like Kujou Sara - Dendrobium). So, taking into account "a hardened shell" theming, who else fits this?

"I must make a lot of Mora." "With enough Mora, my family will never have to smile at me while swallowing their pain, and I will never have to lose anything due to lacking Mora..."

Ding ding ding! It's Dori. In fact, I want to make the case that she fits Sand Grease Pupa better than Kalpalata Lotus, which she currently uses. The motif of Kalpalata Lotus is about "it looks like a lotus, but it isn't", which... works with Dori, I suppose, but isn't particularly compelling. Meanwhile, the Pupa is a 'hardened shell'— like Alhaitham's own boundary-setting unique personality, Dori's shell is her love of Mora, something she uses to face the outer world after the pain of losing her sister to a disease that could have been cured had they had enough money to purchase the herbs needed. Dori's obsessive love of Mora is real, of course, but it's the "hardened shell" that protects her from disappointment after the trauma of losing her sister. It's almost too perfect! (And, Alhaitham and Dori are some of the only rainforest-origin characters to have a slightly strong enough connection to the desert to justify this, not that we really need to.)

This, obviously, ignores release order. My previous comments on reordering regional specialties in Liyue and Inazuma just so happened to be compliant with the order in which they released the items. However, from Sumeru onward, I no longer care.

Ok, but that leaves Nahida high and dry on Kalpalata Lotus, another single case user. Again, the theming works for her, but it isn't really perfect— of course Nahida represents the "looks weak, is a lot more" archetype pretty well, but it isn't exactly congruent with "looks like a lotus, but isn't", because that's more of a question of identity than of power. I mean, I guess our meeting her in the AQ is kind of like that, but that's also a weak argument.

I think, therefore, we should move Nahida to use the Padisarah, which has hitherto only been used by Nilou, fixing another one of our single-character-material problems and allowing us to delete Kalpalata Lotus (or make it a quest exclusive item to Caribert, that would be cool). Like, I hope I don't need to elaborate why the Padisarah is suitable for Nahida, being a "holy and noble" plant descended from GoF and the era of the Three God-Kings of Sumeru, plus it being a calque (more explicitly in CN) of Padishah, the sovereign title used in Persia and beyond, which of course suits Nahida as she is, like it or not, sovereign ruler of Sumeru (would be a nice fuck you to the Sages too).

Sethos

At this juncture, we need to talk about the elephant in the room. Before Sethos was drip-marketed for version 4.7, I would've completely discounted Trishiraite as useless and said to dump it. However, I now have to reconsider, since Sethos has been leaked to use Trishiraite (wow, were they setting this up more than 9 patches ago?).

We don't know much about Sethos, admittedly, but we know he's a desert native and seems to be affiliated with the Temple of Silence and has connections to Cyno (I have not fully played through Cyno SQ II at the time of writing. If you have a more compelling case based on its events, please give spoiler warnings). Given this, Trishiraite seems perfectly reasonable for him, although there is the question of if he's a Temple of Silence member (albeit seemingly opposed to Cyno, given implications in the trailer), why he isn't just using the Scarab, because just read the Scarab lore:

Legend has it that when the desert king ruled this land, the souls of those vanquished by him would be sealed within these insects by the magically-skilled priests at great triumphs held in the City of the Pillars. The scarabs would then be charged with defending the sacred temples and palaces for all eternity in the name of Al-Ahmar. In the end, the temples would collapse and the palaces would fall, and only these golden insects would remain, fulfilling their ancient, forgotten oaths.

Like, even if we don't know Sethos' true role, his Temple of Silence affiliations (?) would make this far more fitting.

But, as you may have noticed, I've been delaying assigning Dehya anywhere. That's because I think if Sethos does use Trishiraite, Dehya should too. Read the description:

During the sun-swallowing battles of that bygone age, even the hardest of stones were set aflame. As the flames of war died out, all that remained from the calamity were these deep-red ores.

Trishiraite is ore born (allegedly) from the flames of the Cataclysm setting fire to stone. Like, it's a very warlike thing, and it's something that might be ok with Sethos but definitely suits Dehya more than Sand Grease Pupa. The thing is, nobody wins here because if I think Sethos suits Scarab more, that leaves Dehya alone on Trishiraite; if I don't, then Sethos + Dehya use Trishiraite while Cyno stays alone on Scarab, which is fine but ugh....

...unless, of course, we put Dehya on Henna Berry, which is very definitely the "female desert ascension material" and annoying stereotypical (fits with Dehya's love of makeup, though). Then we could make Sethos use Scarab alongside Cyno and just delete Trishiraite anyway, but this is a problem I don't want to propose a definitive solution for. I just think that Dehya shouldn't use Sand Grease Pupa, and Sethos seems weirdly better with Scarab, at least for now.

Sethos

Fontaine

(Warning! I am going to be factoring the ascension material of Clorinde and Sigewinne, who were recently drip-marketed for Version 4.7. This is minor leak territory, but if you don't wish to see it, skip the sections labeled Clorinde and Sigewinne.)

Fontaine is obviously still a nation-in-progress, so I'll cut it some slack, however:

Why does Navia use Spring of the First Dewdrop. Please. For the love of god.

Spring of the First Dewdrop is heavily implied to be somewhat related to Primordial Water, which is just—? Can I say how cruel this is for being Navia's ascension material? Like? Navia, who almost dissolved in the Primordial Water??

Although, the description calls it Ichor, which according to Wine Goblet of the Pristine Sea is the 'essence' extracted from Primordial Water, but then we have the question of why Dewdrop's description calls it "a final gift from Egeria" even though it was Remus who isolated and created Ichor, like we know Egeria was the substitute Heart of the Primordial Sea created by the Shade of Life to replace the Hydro Dragon, so technically the creation of Primordial Water is her domain, but this shouldn't even be her "final gift" anyway because logically that would've been literally anything else she did, because she abandoned that Heart role when she ascended to become the Hydro Archon and then died in sacrifice at Tunigi Hollow to repel the Cataclysm—

But this isn't a rant about Genshin lore, this is about the regional specialty. So.

Navia should not be using this. So, what should she be using? I'd suggest Lumidouce (French: soft-light) Bell, given the variety of people with whom Navia has parted and wishes to be reunited with ("Lumidouce Bell is said to represent parting and the wish for reunion"), but given that this is already being used by Chevreuse and Lynette and is absolutely slated for Emilie, the perfumer, whenever she releases ("...is often used for making rare perfumes"), that would be a bit of a crowd when Fontaine still doesn't have many characters.

Chevreuse doesn't really seem to fit Lumidouce Bell, though. Like, every attribute and theming doesn't seem to relate to her, unless you count the events of Roses and Muskets, which is about her personal feelings on justice, not the actual events that happened which could, possibly, fit the parting and reunion theme. So maybe we can boot Chevreuse off to Subdetection Unit, which actually suits her better— it's a detection unit, which gathers data, and it being used by Wriothesley seems like a not-so-subtle indicator that it's used to gather intelligence and for lack of a better word, spy. Which is something that Chevreuse's job involves, as once again demonstrated by Roses and Muskets.

So, with the Chevreuse tangent out of the way, Navia and Lynette can use the Lumidouce Bell. But what about Dewdrop? Should anyone use that?

Well, the obvious argument for Dewdrop as a Primordial Water thing is that Neuvillette should use it. Like, he's the reborn Hydro Dragon— thematically it makes more sense than Lumitoile (French: light-star). Let's again set aside the problem of time (Neuvillette released Version 4.1, Dewdrop came with the Tower of Ipsissimus in Version 4.2) because it makes things boring...

that being said, it's not entirely unreasonable to have Neuvillette use the Lumitoile, and simply delete the Dewdrop instead. Let's examine that below.

Clorinde and Sigewinne

So, what should we do about Lumitoile? If we move Neuvillette to the Dewdrop, that leaves Clorinde the sole user of the Lumitoile, and it's pretty justified in her case given the unsubtle implication of the Lumitoile as an environmental cleaner/digester and Clorinde's job as a Champion Duellist but with the Marechaussee Hunt techniques she inherits. After all, remember it's Clorinde who starts the plan to 'hunt' Furina in the AQ, to entrap her. She's good at hunting and cleaning up, so that makes the Lumitoile quite suited for her...

...Although, there is a scheme I'm cooking up. See, Sigewinne uses the Romaritime Flower, which fits fine with the Hydro stuff just fine, but I was reading the description of the Romaritime Flower, and it said: "Romaritime Flower is said to represent loyalty and unswerving oaths." And what, apart from being a strong hunter, is Clorinde known for?

Clorinde: Mr. Callas' last wish was for me to ensure your safety, and I will not betray his trust.  Like the Faint Moonlight of Yesteryear, in As Light Rain Falls Without Reason, after Clorinde saves Navia and Traveler from the Gardemek attack

It highly depends on what you think her character hinges more heavily on: hunting, or her loyalty/oath-swearing.

As for Sigewinne, using the Lumitoile would also work, because apart from the obvious Hydro theming, the Lumitoile is also about 'underestimation'— "though the weak light they give off is often ignored by divers, these small soft-bodied animals have the remarkable ability to consume and degrade industrial waste." Sigewinne's surprise gun attack in the AQ earns her this, in my opinion.

This is quite a complicated web to unravel. If Neuvillette no longer uses Lumitoile, then either both Clorinde and Sigewinne should use Lumitoile, or neither. Therefore, let's examine two cases.

1: Neuvillette uses Dewdrop. Therefore, nobody else uses Lumitoile, ergo, Clorinde should use Romaritime Flower alongside Sigewinne to avoid the 'single-user' issue.

2: Neuvillette does not use Dewdrop, and that material is deleted from existence. Therefore, Clorinde and Sigewinne can stay with their current specialty materials: Lumitoile and Romaritime Flower respectively.

I like case 2, personally.

But maybe I'm getting ahead of myself by analysing the ascension materials of characters that haven't released yet. Let's get back to normal.

Clorinde and Sigewinne

Quick recap: Neuvillette uses Dewdrop instead of Navia, and Navia uses Lumidouce Bell in place of Chevreuse, whom we boot off to use the Subdetection Unit. Therefore, we have solved the problem of Navia and Wriothesley being the only user of one ascension material, and realistically we have to leave Neuvillette alone with the Dewdrop because no one else actually makes sense ascending via Primordial Water, what the fuck.

Ahem.

We also leave Furina alone, being the Lakelight Lily dovetails with Erinnyes and the lore of her weapon, Splendour of Tranquil Waters.

So that leaves Charlotte with the Beryl Conch. Hey, Charlotte, what the fuck? Like, the Beryl Conch doesn't have anything visibly in common with her. It glows, and it's not actually a shell but something condensed from elemental energy. It's theorised to have connections to "ancient civilisations". What else? If you take this from Charlotte's 'investigative journalism' angle, perhaps the Conch can symbolise Charlotte digging for the truth, but the "oh perhaps the Conch has marks left by the Hydro Lord or is related to ancient civilisations" is such a weak connection to that kind of "what is the truth" ethos that Charlotte represents.

So, get rid of the Beryl Conch. Then what should Charlotte use? There's an obvious option here: what ascension material have we just talked about that applies to information-gathering, spying, and mechanical parts? What boss did I assign Charlotte to in this post about boss material bloat that also fits her mechanical companion, Monsieur Verite?

That's right.

The former two, as justified above, also share the Subdetection Unit. So why not Charlotte? It's the 'mechanical' ascension material of Fontaine, just like Prototype Cal. Breguet is the corresponding 'mechanical' boss material. Last time, I justified this with the mechanical focus of the three characters: Wriothesley's gauntlets and his rule of the steampunk-themed Fortress of Meropide, Chevreuse's gun and rifle focus, and Charlotte's entire kit and lore revolving around Monsieur Verite in her pursuit of journalism. This applies here, but it gets better because they also share the theming of the Subdetection Unit's 'spying/detection/information-gathering'.

It's so perfect that it feels a bit too perfect, actually, but who am I to complain? This would cut down on another ill-fitting regional specialty and make farming easier for all of us.

***

Thanks for reading! And letting me rant about this. I have problems with how Genshin treats boss and ascension materials with some degree of lore relevancy, only to also throw some of that relevancy out the window when it suits them. It's inconsistent and bothers me, lol.

[seri-tonin]

What if I wrote a whole essay analyzing aventurine's design and why it works so well

[blushouyo]

as much as it would benefit me if it wasn't like this, I'm kinda proud of hyv for managing to keep dottore's model from leakers

[versadies]

Hi!! Congrats for the 7k!! For the event: Capitano + feiyun slope + prompts 11 and 12 + night + sunny. Thanks!! Ngl the prompts inspired me a little, maybe I'll write something for myself later, good luck with the event! 7k is a lot of people.

come back, be here. (capitano x gn!reader)

AIRLINE... COME BACK, BE HERE.

STEWARD... bodyguard!capitano (w/ gn!reader)

LOCATION... feiyun slope (bodyguard!au), 11-12 ST. "get away from me." + "tell me where it hurts" on a sunny weather (drabble)

PLANE... angst/no-comfort, bodyguard!au, mentions of gunshot, mentions of blood, assassination, mentions of hospitals, OOC CAPITANO (this fic is way before hyv gives us capitano lore crumbs)

PASSENGERS... @scaraslover @saving-for-xiao @dawgimsohot @kazu-topia @chiruru @aqualesha @renamichii @mrkamisato @shenhesl0ver @serami00 @serenareiss @hiqhkey @emperatris-rinaka @bystander36 @irisxiel @ladycoleigh @034ven @dear-dairiess @owozi8 @hadesaedes @chiro-chiro-kun @hersscherofyatta @mariusvonhangme @yuzuricebun @hoshikistarlette @solaaresque @crowbird @lordbugs @flowersforayato @headintheclouddd @estelwrld @giyusimpsassemble @irethepotatosblog @moonlightaangel @alice0blog @shotosbrainrot @sniffoat @chihawari @mxsomn @kuni-kuzushii @jiminscarmex @mitsukii14 @nejibot @ylimeprive @sachispet @loreleis-world @sn-owo @starforecasts @someonetookmynamelmao @ceylestia @koshiisu @ymikkos @reallysporadicarcade

LANDING... in which you and capitano thought everything's going to be okay until everything went wrong.

PILOT... sorry in advance if it seems rushed, but here it is !! hope you enjoy it, anon <33

PENPAL SERVICE... MASTERLIST || 7K MILESTONE EVENT || 7K MASTERLIST (coming soon)

You were just fine moments ago.

You’re simply standing on stage talking to your dear fans, with Capitano stationed nearby as he talks through other security guards who are inspecting the area to keep you safe. He couldn’t help but admire your caring and thoughtful self towards your fans, who all listened to you with admirance and eagerness. He’d be lying if he said he doesn’t understand them, not when he too admires you.

It’s still a surprise to him that you’re dating someone like him, who doesn’t deserve to be with you at all (even though you disagreed about his words about himself). Yet he didn’t seem to mind it, not when he feels like he’s the happiest man on Earth whenever he’s with you.

The two of you met while you were looking for a personal bodyguard from the Fatui organization who could protect you ever since your fame rose above to the skies, and to his surprise you picked him for such a role despite many protests from both your manager and the one in charge of introducing you to your choices.

“He looks like he knows his stuff.” You explained to your manager, who feels uneasy at the sight of the tall man. “I think I can trust him in protecting me. Are you fine with that, big guy?” 

He nodded in response, curious of you. 

Being your bodyguard is certainly a breath of fresh air, if Capitano could describe it. Not only do you always check on his well being, you also treat him as if he’s your friend unlike his previous bosses, who’d treat him as if he’s a weapon or some dog. 

As much as he didn’t want to admit it, he found himself caring for you. 

He felt proud of your achievements, pity for you whenever you cried, giving you advice when you asked him for something, and of course, the urge to protect you from harm’s way whenever the both of you are out together. 

It took him a while to realize that the way his face would grow warm, the way his stomach feels as if it’s twisting and flying, the way he feels lured by you, the way he felt something when you didn’t seem to mind his quietness and how he always wears his helmet, and the way he feels weird are all simply his love for you that grew strong day by day.

When you confessed your feelings for him one night, it all hit him like a train, and he couldn’t help but carry you and twirl you around regardless of your weight as you laugh and squeal from his sudden reaction after being frozen for a minute. 

He never expected himself that he’d end up this way, happily being dedicated to his job and happily being your boyfriend who always looks out for you. 

Capitano thought everything would be fine.

Until a gunshot was heard.

It was so loud – too loud – his ears began to ring as he immediately looks at where you are with worry, and you’re just standing there with your words dying in your throat. 

It was only when he sees you looking at his direction in shock before falling down to the floor that Capitano instantly runs towards you as the audience panics and starts running away in fear. 

“Tell me where it hurts, ( Name ).” He said as he immediately looks for the gunshot wound, his heart racing in fear for you and for your life. You were just fine moments ago, you were just okay back there–

“Ca.. Capitano…” You choked out, breathing heavily. “I’m… I’m sorry you have to see me l-like this.” 

It felt like the world slowly stopped around the both of you when Capitano saw blood seeping out from your clothing, his heart sank in dread. “You’ll be okay, ( Name ). You’ll be okay, your manager’s calling the ambulance, you’ll be okay.”

“They won’t make it.” You said, crying out in pain when you felt him pressuring your wound with a ripped cloth to stop the bleeding. “I… I won’t make it, Capitano.. You need to get out b-before they might shoot you t-too–”

“I’m not leaving you, ( Name ). You will make it.” 

“I love you, Capitano.. This is never your fault.”

“No, don’t talk to me that way. You’re not going to leave me this way–” 

You slowly reach out to his helmet, caressing it with a pained smile. “This.. is just like those movies we’ve watched, rig..ht?” You close your eyes shut and wince when you feel your wound once again. “I don’t wan.. Want to die either, Capitano.” 

“You won’t die, just stay with me, ( Name ).”

Just in time, the medical team arrived to take you to the ambulance waiting for you, and Capitano didn’t hesitate to help them carry you and follow them towards the ambulance as the other security found the people behind this cruel moment. He can help them later, what matters to him more is to be there for you and hope you’ll be okay.

When you slowly reach your hand out towards him while on your way to the hospital, he held your hand in response with no intentions of letting go. 

You’ll be okay. You’ll be taken care of and have your bullet removed, then you’ll perfectly be alive and well.

Then once you’re okay, Capitano can fix his mistake and make sure you won’t go through this painful experience again. He’ll be there for you as you recover your wound and continue your lives together as a happy couple.

And once he’s ready… He can remove his mask and show his face that he feared will make you leave him, but he knows long enough that you wouldn’t so such thing, not when you remind him just how much you love him.

So why… why did it all go wrong?

“GET AWAY FROM ME!” Capitano roared as the nurses held him back from coming to the room as you cried out his name in pain, the doctors tending to your wounds as best as they could. “THEY NEED ME, LET ME GO!”

It took a few or less agonizing hours until he was finally allowed to go inside your room. 

When he did, you’re already gone. 

He thought you were just sleeping peacefully, but when he realized you weren’t, it felt like his heart stopped beating.

What went wrong?

“I’m sorry for your loss, sir.” The doctor spoke as he stood behind the bodyguard in remorse. “We did everything we could, but unfortunately Mx. ( Last Name ) lost too much blood–”

“Get out of my sight.” Capitano spoke coldly, staring at your now lifeless body.

He tries to hold himself back from destroying everything and possibly kill someone in anger that he wasn’t there for you when you got shot, that he wasn’t there for you when you entered the surgery room crying in pain, that he wasn’t there for you when you died.

The doctor didn’t hesitate to leave the room, but not without one last look of sympathy before closing the door, leaving the man alone with your corpse. 

As soon as the door closes shut, Capitano finally broke down his cold composure, his head leaning down on your hand as his breath is shaking from the thought that you’re gone forever. If people saw him now, their perspective of the fearsome bodyguard would change everything.

“...I’m sorry, ( Name ).” 

I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you before your last breath. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to stop the gunshot. I’m sorry I wasn’t enough to protect you. I’m sorry you weren’t able to see my face.

I’m sorry I didn’t get to say I love you too.

[randomrealityshift]

people keep insisting the new training guide genshin added with the newest patch is great for newbies/casual players, but it suggests the most comically wrong things that i feel like it's going to be more a detriment to them in the long run lmfao

under a cut bc screencaps and i know no one cares about this shit but me lmfao

--

it prioritizes 5* weapons over 4*/3* which isn't necessarily a good thing, esp when it suggests 5* weapons that give NO BENEFITS TO THE CHARACTER THEY SUGGEST THEM TOO however, it ONLY suggests the weapons that you currently have on your account plus craftable weapons (not sure about fishing since i already have the catch and the pipe?) which is a surprisingly unscummy thing for hyv to do? congrats guys, not as terrible as you could have been. ex 1.

recommending the unforged on itto is comical. it's an atk% weapon with an effect that further buffs your atk. on a DEF SCALING CHARACTER. literally what is he getting from this? it will also recommend the unforged for noelle too, who at least can get a little more use from it than itto (since she actually uses her atk stat), but serpent spine and whiteblind are both much better options for both of them.

ex 2.

FUCKING HOMA ON CHEV???? a crit dmg weapon with a 20% hp buff (actually useful for her) and atk buffs at low HP for a character that you primarily play OFF FIELD. the HP buff from its effect is fine but if you want more HP literally black tassel is RIGHT there and you should have a million of them by virtue of just playing the game. Also Rightful Reward is another one that sounds ok on paper but needs more nuance that newbies/casual players probably aren't going to notice. You can only proc it's effect if you heal the HOLDER, and chev's heals only effect the on-field character until you get her c6, so it's going to be inconsistent energy regen until then.

--

another issue it has is that it will forever have a tantrum at you for NOT leveling one of your talents, even if the character straight up doesn't use that talent. this isn't a HUGE deal, but it's stupid as fuck to insist players waste resources on shit they really don't need to ex 1.

level 90 furina with level 90 weapon at 1/9/9 talents

again, it's not a huge deal, but the double red arrows for NOT LEVELING HER NORMAL ATKS is batshit considering her playstyle. you put her on field, you summon her pets, you hit her burst, you take her off field. that's literally it, you are generally not playing her on field unless you have her c6. i know this system isn't that nuanced, but insisting people waste resin and mats to level something that most players aren't even using is stupid as fuck.

ex 2.

lvl 80 Jean with lvl 80 Fav Sword with 2/5/7 talents shows "room for improvement"

furina was at least green bc she was level 90 with a 90 weapon, but jean isn't bc she's 80 with an 80 weapon lmao hot take: atk scaling healers don't need to be level 90, the atk/healing boost isn't worth the sheer amount of effort and mats needed to get there. but again, the system is having a tantrum over the talents (which could be better for burst and skill, i admit. but healer jean doesn't need normals leveled), NOT the level or weapon.

ex 3.

level 80 yaoyao with level 70 Fav Lance with 2/6/6 talents shows "room for improvement"

this one is even more hilarious, bc i agree she could be better, but not for the reasons hyv is insisting. yaoyao is an HP scaling healer and dendro, so leveling to 90 is actually super important if you're going to be using her regularly for her heals and dendro reactions. more important than leveling the weapon OR talents, i'd argue lmao. again, nuance.

[baeshijima]

blade strimmer au where he whales for your character and your weapon (and your niche supports) to have you deal big BIG damage 💯 everyone associates blade w ur character and if someone mentions you, streamer blade will follow 😭 also the type to buy your merch to the point of buying all of the stocks,,,, some complain that your limited merch is the first one to be sold out in few seconds and associate the doing to blade HAHDHDHD (share some blessings blade ://)

also congrats on 4k followers!! i hope you're doing well and good luck on your exams! 💓

who single-handedly raises the avg income for ur banners? blade.

oh, this 5* support and these 4* supports are supposedly super good and practically designed for ur kit? instant e6 s5 just to buff u.

probably has emotes that are just u ,,, literally said to his artists he would pay them double- no, triple to have a set 🐥

AND YES THE MERCH???!?!??" he is literally the epitome of these memes when hyv announces ur exclusive, limited edition merch with a set number of items available in this run

(in that order from left to right btw <33)

[drysauce]

Also ok so I told you abt my crazy luck w the baizhu banner....

I had about 20/25 pity after that and thought. I'm not close to even a 4 star, let alone a 5 anyway so why not.

I did 2 pulls.

Got c1 alhaitham. (was guaranteed after tighnari)

🪟🏃

I am not complaining at all but WHAT THE FUCK

Hyv really said here take all of them after the two years of horrendous pity luck

Now let's hope I can snipe a 50/50 win for a Fontaine character fhrhfbd

mannn you're monopolizing all the gacha luck jshdhd congrats congrats!! i have no clue what's alhaitham c1 but hopefully it's a cool upgrade to him!

when will this happen to me

i relate with the horrendous pity luck during two years, with 9:4 lose:win ratio and never getting a character on less than 40 pity im definitely not loved by the gacha gods lmao

manifesting winning all our 50/50s in fontaine 🙏 have i already asked you who will you be going for?

[actualbird]

i got the luke SR timely rescue and (SPOILERS!!!!!!!!!) i'll say it... he def knows some shit about rosa's parents like. the way he looked so nervous and changed topics when she was wondering aloud if her parents were doing a similar work luke does for the government? VERY SUS! I was kinda hoping he wouldn't bc I'm sick and tired of being lied to by him for the plot's sake but now I'm 100% sure he knows smth about her parents and has to keep it to himself

waah, congrats on timely rescue!!! when i started playing tot that was the regulay rotation SR i wanted the most (as in i wanted it before the game even rELEASED) and it took like, WAY TOO LONG TO ACTUALLY COME HOME LMAO

and YEAAAAA theres something v obviously going on with mc's parents that i assume luke either knows about and/or is directly linked to. it's been a while since i watched the card but i remember mc mentioning her dad was also rlly into shooting, and then theres in general just the whole "gone on a Top Secret Govt Research" which is exactly the same frigging excuse luke made about his own disappearance, very sus and my god, when will hyv release more deets about mc's parents JHAVFKJDSHFD it's been driving me nuts for ages and ages cuztherES SOMETHING THERE or at least it (whether intentionally or not) IS MADE TO LOOK LIKE SOMETHING IS THERE but i will be patient and wait for the story there to unfold naturally

and by "patient" i mean pacing back and forth in my braid 24/7

on the lying bit, it's not too surprising tbh taking into account the vague timeline of when SR Timely Rescue occurs. all of the regular SR cards take place pretty early on in the main story. if im remembering correctly, in timely rescue doesnt mc attribute luke's crazy good paintball shooting skills to him saying it was a "hobby" he picked up? like the govt work is known but not the NSB agent thing but if im wrong im v sorry, it's been like 10 months since ive watched this card JHVSKJDH. but yea if SR Timely Rescue does have that tidbit then yea, the card was set before main story 5 aka luke hasnt even fessed about the truth of his oWN JOB so it'd be absolutely way too early for him to even be thinking about fessing the truth on other ppl's involvement, esp ppl close to mc, since this is also the period of time hes still got it in his dumb pretty head that the best way to protect her is by keeping her in the dark

ridiculous and infuriating dude....//proceeds to kiss him passionately

oH WAIT theres another thing i remembered. in luke's bday event i distinctly remember mc mentioning that it was mc's parents who told her about His involvement in Top Secret Govt Project and thats why he could no longer come home for a long while.

i found that interesting, why did it have to go thru them specifically, sure, he couldve lied to them too and just wanted to tell them to tell her instead of him telling her directly because of his Overwhelming Guilt Of Hurting MC With His Absence but....idk idk idk maybe an implication that mc's parents, at that point, already knew that luke was doing nsb work? MANY THOUGHTS

but yea i wANNA KNOW MORE ABOUT MC'S PARENTS WHERE ARE THEY WHAT ARE THEY DOING AND LUKE! WHAT! DO! U! KNOW!!!

[tflaw]

THE WAY I SPED THROUGH THE QUEST AFTER FINDING OUT THOMA WAS IN THE SECOND ROUND .. istg i ran for him im crying i missed him so baaad ugh AND HE IS SO DOTING THROUGHOUT THE QUEST I AM MELTINGG

+ i have more since i was spamming screenshots ngl he's just so 😭😭 and on the first round i chose ayaka hihi she is so cute i just wanna kiss her cheeks n hold her hand :((

+ oooh mona has a really good passive it's just like the katheryne support card that makes ur first switch a fast action !! it's very useful and she buffs ur card too <33 and PLEASE tcg is rlly addicting everyday i log in i check if there r new players on sumeru already sndnsm i just want to reach player lvl 7 na huhu i am 70 exp away 🥹

+ naur i kept getting the anemo set instead of fopl so i just decided to fuck it n just focus on his talents 😭 his shield still feels like cardboard ngl two hits from a ruin guard n it's down but andsn i mean he's still lvl 70 and i just focused on his em and er but i hope he gets 22k-25k hp once i ascend him at least :(( i will lvl him up to 90 bc only the faves get to lvl 90 in this house!! and hehe ty <33 the team still has some energy issues but i use them a lot lately !! for commissions n doing some domains .. even spiral abyss omg im surprised they survive til floor 11 🥹 they took quite a beating though lmaoao and i hope for AMAZING rngs for u too omg that circlet was just heartbreaking 💔

+ again congrats for the C1 wanderer im honestly so confused on how u do it youre so lucky fr !! but now u rlly have to change ur signature to C1 kuni haver !! instead HAHA and hu tao, xiao and yelan rerun omg ?!??? where is my girl shenhe though 😞 i hope they let him out of their basement but aaa i want all three too these banners r just crazy ... im a bit thankful that shenhe might not get a rerun yet bc im so sure i wouldnt stay strong 💔

OH YEAH gajsha i knew you’d dash once thoma appears and he did !! i chose him && he’s so sweet pls he brought homemade snacks i am so in LOVE he is the #househusband i’m telling u i will propose to him one day

+ WAIT i have mona na pala :o i’ll try a proper team comp w her later !! ive still got some npcs to fight in inazuma city <//3 tbh i think i need to strategize better w my cards bcos i HATE it when i have dead cards its like i always wanna win with my cards untouched 😭 pls these npcs are so strong too ??? what RIGHTS do they have i defeat characters easier than these npcs

+ i’m telling u hyv knows what we want i have a decent flower / circlet but it’s from another set <//3 yeah i told u i focus on talents these days too <//3 maybe i couldn’t do the abyss bcos of skill issue ahahaha <//3 i have lots of copium artifacts too and they work so i’m like fuck it and focus on talents na lang muna!! building faruzan + layla rn !! pls i need to c6 faruzan but i promised myself i’m gonna save for hu tao <//3 bought welkin yesterday too so i might lose the 50/50 im so scared ai hold my hand kinda eyeing thoma too for kuni avatar team comp !! but layla’s lvl 60 ascended to 70 and she boosts crit so yes bye thoma <//3

+ AGSJSH this is my luckiest banner thus far the sweat i produced when it turned gold pls i was so shocked i didn’t move for 3 whole minutes i was just staring at the screen !! bcos i fr thought i was gonna lose but his silhouette appeared god so that was the joy of getting c1 as low spender 😔🙏

[hematomes]

I forgot to mention that I did risk rolling on the current banner and I got Layla! Without a 5* so nothing's too screwed up :D

well i mean I'll still pray i get scara. I'm suprised hyv isn't running xiao right after, with how INSANELY BAD my luck w him has been. They say it's shogun then Itto now but i'm not holding my breath lmao WATCH THEM JUST WHIP XIAO OUT, JUST TO MESS WITH ME 😭

congrats!!

zndkz don't worry the line-up they announced in the livestream is definite, so it's not gonna change

however 3.4 is the lantern rite, so there's a good chance xiao will rerun then

[xiaowhore]

HI MAO!!! i haven’t sent an ask in a while ;; but omg congrats that school is finally over!! and on that luke + artem + marius roll ?!?! like DAMN good for you!! here i am grinding through all the personal chapters because my savings weren’t enough and my ass got broke midway,, i still have 10 rolls left before i’m guaranteed to even get the luke card… :( hyv is a demon grr

your fics are as breathtaking as always!! pls dont even get me started with that tot teaser for your fic 🥹 and i totally agree with your rant review on luke’s story lmao — this man mercilessly ruined everyone for us helpless simps, and i would take it again any day 😔👍

putting that aside, i hope you’re doing well and that you’ll be able to get the rest u deserve during vacation! :) have an amazing summer ahead hehehe <3 ilysm stay hydrated and take care always mao!! 🫶🏼

HELLO ZALY im so sorry to answer this so late 😭😭 but thank you!!

just to be clear, those 4 ssrs weren't in 1 account (oh man how i wish they were), i play in 2 accs and they each have 2 anniv ssrs :'D i made sure to get enough funds to get all of them but HH artem was so stubborn...... by the time i answer this, i hope you already have the card you want 💕💕 (i totally rushed through the personal stories too jshsjsj. luke's got me sweating fr, the thrill aspect was great but god i was so nervous while reading it)

aaaa speaking of fics!!! your recent fic got me squealing and screaming :(( the cliffhangers were too harsh 😩 each part got me on my toes grRrrR what will happen to kazuha and y/n now?!???!!?! (the xiao part gave me so much secondhand embarrassment bc i could imagine how humiliating that would be irl hh) that aside, the layout was super cute too, it was really creative!!

im not sure if you're on summer break as well, but i hope you rest well and have fun!!! take care of yourself too bestie 💖💕💖

[solaaresque]

ehh that's true :/ but am still angy at old lady hatsune miku >:(( i swear i'm gonna start calling her a granny /hj. abdvhahdbshd anyways i think gorou is playing hard to get with me since i think he's sulking in the corner :'D HAHSGW YESS KAORUP!! he's a skrunkle man. his story is sad tho :'(( also his wedding card is rlly pretty. also himeru,,it's interesting how we dont know his actual name?? anyways congrats on ibara!! another funny man hehe. also- who's ur favorite unit? ~Lycoris

her demo music slaps tho :) absolute banger tbh hyv slayed w that one !! fr tho gorou hiding in a corner….u gotta tempt him out w treats methinks 🤔🤔

kaoru is a lil creachurr to me. she’s so just some guy coded tee bee aych. it’s the mommy issues turned kink for me /hj himeru… they’re a strange guy. i Need to study them under a microscope and see wtf is wrong w them.

thamk u!! im glad i got him…he has evaded my pulls but no longer !! eden loves sol confirmed ?!

my fave unit 🤔 well. valk for sure #valkP4lyfe :3 but i also love eden + 2wink!!! wbu??

[astranne]

boss!!!!

i am currently saving for yelan, and with cyno i got him to c3r1 T-T it took everything in me to not drop money on him. but how are you doing?? im so sorry that it’s been a while since i’ve lasted talked to you :((

->🫧

hi there 🫧!! very happy to hear from you again :D

don’t worry, you didn’t miss much, i was on a long hiatus but now i’m back! well, kinda but still xD

and congrats on the cyno cons! i’m regretting a bit to skipping him, but i have waited for my raiden so long (and i went weak for nahida so-) i hope i can get her weapon too. currently 240 wishes, if i lose my 50/50 twice, i’m going to cry

other than that, i’m doing well, just super busy since school has started for me again and i have to write a massive essay about my internship 😔 it will determine if i’m allowed to the finals so yeah, i’m stressing myself a bit.

i hope you’re doing well too! and good luck on saving yelan, i wish us all many primos and more gifts from hyv!!

[versadies]

Got the account back😻❗❓❓ hoyoverse that will be 3000 primos

I also found so many bugs and glitches I'm gonna make us rich with primos 😋😋

YASSS CONGRATS COMRADE 🎉🎉🎉🎉 that would be 12k primos hyv 🤞🤞🤞😍😍😍😍 /j

[eirvyan]

finally went through the 3.1 livestream. that's some good stuff, and i'm excited.

mika is so cute, i adore that waver in his voice. he looks like kagamine len + oliver, sure, but that's not a bad thing in my book. if anything, i think oliver's bandages suit mika.

razor is finally getting more screentime! he and bennett were so good together during the windblume festival and i hope for more of that +klee here.

"[paimon's] got nothing on your former partner" is a weird statement for enjou to make. who is the abyss sibling's former partner? *gasp* is it another paimon?

anime? anime. congrats on hyv for getting utofable for an adaptation.

[baeshijima]

So uhm

I logged into hsr today and was positively surprised by the double banners, moreover it was Seele who I found really cool and so I cleared the first two worlds from the stimulated universe and got hold of those stellar jade

And I did the warp... I was at 11 pity and it turned gold

Surely it wouldn't be Seele, and so I hoped I would see Himeko or Welt

... it was Seele... at 11 pity

I'm still so surprised omg is this because the game wants to give me everyone but welt and himeko or is my hsr luck just amazing to compensate for my dull luck from genshin?

Still in utter surprise, the new hsr player

new hsr player nonnie i humbly ask u to hand over ur luck. pls. hyv games hates me and enjoys my suffering i just want one lucky gacha roll.

no but fr CONGRATS ON THE EARLY SEELE????? having both her AND jingliu is such a w u are winning in the dps department 😩 manifesting welt and himeko for u tho so u can have the astral express family 🫶