#console playing is filled with strife

[sebaastiansallovv]

please don't call me ignorant, I will cry x

[anitosoul]

My Favorite Albums of 2020

9. Adrienne Lenker, songs/instrumentals

Favorite Tracks: zombie girl | come | not a lot, just forever

This album is really special to me because it’s tied to one of my favorite days of 2020. Amidst the chaos that was the global pandemic, the lead up to the 2020 election, and attempting to continue with life despite all of the external strife, I decided to have a “treat yourself” day alone in the Bronx. I had wanted to check out the Bronx Zoo and NY Botanical Garden since I moved to the city and always saved it thinking it could be a good idea for a date or something, but my solo day in the Bronx ultimately ended up being consolation for the (trying not to be pathetic) fact that I didn’t have anyone to go with. I couldn’t be more grateful, though, that I ended up spending it alone, as this album guided my journey and helped me reflect on a lot of my life and insecurities.

The day I decided to do my Bronx excursion ended up being rainy and dreary, immediately adding a wave of melancholic introspection (and slight disappointment) to my plans. I started off at the zoo and wasn’t really feeling it. It was just weird walking around a zoo alone as a 23 year old and seeing the animals just wasn’t as exciting as I’d remembered it being as a kid. After cutting my losses and walking over to the Botanical Garden, I was immediately more interested in the beautiful plant and flower arrangements throughout the grounds. I got a hot chocolate and walked around until I found a part of the botanical garden that was preserved and protected land, allowing visitors to experience what the area would look like without human development. I found a log and sat down, feeling overwhelmed from the day so far and relieved to take a load off. I remembered that songs had released a few days prior and started playing it from my headphones.

From the moment I put on the album, I was instantly put at ease, feeling a sense of relaxation and calm that I had been seeking all along. Adrianne Lenker recorded the album entirely analog directly to tape in a secluded cabin. In the liner notes, it mentions that the album features “Lenker’s vocals and her playing acoustic guitar, as well using a paint brush and the needles of a white pine tree as instruments. It also features recordings of the rain, the wind, the fire from a wood stove, the chimes on her front porch, the birds, and the insects of the forest.” songs/instrumentals are the ultimate expression of complexity in simplicity: despite the sparse instrumentation, Lenker delivers a rich, gorgeous project filled with deep musicality.

songs is an album drawing upon lived experience, but at its core is a representation of individual interpretation of solitude. In this write-up I don’t want to do the album injustice with some pretentious analysis of the meaning behind Lenker’s thoughtful and deeply personal lyrics; you can read Pitchfork reviews for that. I do want to write about some of the things I ruminated on in the rainy botanical garden forest based on one lyric from my favorite track, zombie girl:

oh, emptiness tell me ‘bout your nature maybe i’ve been getting you wrong i cover you with questions cover you with explanations cover you with music - Adrianne Lenker, “zombie girl”

As I walked through the forest, I thought a lot about what it means to be alone. I thought about the stigma I felt about being out in the world by myself: in so many ways it feels as if the world pushes those who are alone out of sight, as if activity can only be enjoyed with company. I always felt insecure about being alone, realizing the pangs of envy when I would see a couple in the park or through a restaurant window. I felt the pressures from all kinds of sources to fear loneliness, that as a young person I should be constantly seeking sex or a relationship and filling the rest of the time with a vibrant social life, that being single and dating is just a hurdle before finding some sense of security and settling down with someone forever. Ever since I could develop crushes, I found myself feeling an inexplicable longing for fulfillment from another person, but this year I’ve finally started to unpack that feeling. This was the first year I truly felt satisfied just being myself and spending time with myself: the space from work, school, and social life gave opportunity for reflection and connection to the environment, allowing me to realize that I feel just as alive sitting under a tree in the rain as I do moshing with friends at a music festival, that my own self-love can be as affirming as that of a partner.

I also thought about solitude in terms of family and how lucky I am to have the life I live. My parents were both born into poverty in the Philippines, which is basically the least privileged position to be born into in the world given the developing status of the Philippines. Recognizing the amount of struggle that was required from my parents, and all my ancestors long before them, to provide me with such an opportunistic life allowed me to view my situation in a different light. My solitude was powerful and gave me reflective space, but I was not alone: I’m bonded through a beautiful, rich culture that continues to thrive despite the impacts of colonization. The awakening of this ancient connection has spurred powerful healing and inspired a relationship with my heritage that I have never felt before.

By giving emptiness and nature its own space and not covering it with questions, explanations, or music, I’ve gained more wisdom than I’d ever thought possible. I considered the fact that the world is a living system in and of itself and it doesn’t have any expectations for us humans—we’re exploiting it, but it continues to nourish us and give us life. Trees don’t have to establish some elaborate rule system about how not to destroy each other like us humans do, they just exist and help each other. Hearing songs on that rainy forest day was the first step towards my 2021 resolution: be more like trees. Thinking about solitude and nature and the process of recording this album also spurred me to commit to building a sustainable off-grid cabin with my dad, something he’s always talked about and that we’re finally turning into a reality. Overall, this album became much larger than a musical body of work; it became a teacher, perfectly capturing my range of reflective thoughts and inspiring action. To me, this album is like looking at a plant—truly noticing the natural grace of its colors, shapes, and textures—and taking that appreciation a step further, planting a seed to inspire that beauty for others in the future.

[yandere-sins]

What about a stern priest that falls in love with a girl who just came to visit his church because she moved into his small town? Although very religious for his whole life, he's just accepting the girl for who she is, a complete opposite (even if they have the same interest in arts, books etc) First she's friendly but then becomes distant because notices his interest in her... And he's sure that this girl is a "god's gift" to him after all these years of loyalty and they're meant to be together

Can’t deny that I am always smitten with yandere’s that need to be ‘pure’ for some reason or another. Just a big ol’ weak spot of mine :D Enjoy!

»»———————— ♡ ————————««    

They were meant for each other.

Anyone opposing that fact was spouting profanities in the face of their own god. After all, it was the power from above that sent her to his church, made her find her way to his threshold. She was a blessing in the form of a human, just like him, and he could not have asked for a better gift after all these years of devotion to nothing but their Lord’s instructions.

Alone the fact that she returned to him in time for confession was enough to prove it. For a while, the Priest had feared that she might lose her way, seemingly nowhere to be found around the church. But thanks to the urging of the people in the community, she had been pushed back on the righteous way meant for her. Right back to him.

From the moment she had arrived in the small fisher’s town, she had changed up the ways of the people, teaching them new technologies and antics she learned in the big city she had come from. He hadn’t been all too happy with it, seeing how the people started to strife away from traditions and values. With the wind of change that she brought, other, less welcome members of society joined the community. Gamblers, corrupt salesman, harlots. Now it was a bustling place, and so was his church and especially his confession booth, as the people flocked in with tales of deception and infidelity.

But it would have been a lie if he said she didn’t move him too.

He had never been anything but the town’s priest, the position promised to him when he was just two days old. Every waking moment of his life had he spent studying the holy scripts, practicing ancient rites, and helping people over their problems no matter the topic, even when he was still too young to even understand them. A prodigy priest, that’s what he had become with just 16, and now, with 24, he was an important member of the community, even though the people began turning away from him.

It wasn’t his fault that he grew stern and cold. If anyone else had been confronted with the sins of humanity from such an old age, breaking down over fearing to fall into the same misery as other people did, surely, they’d began to grow a thicker skin too. And now that he had her, he knew there was at least one other person who understood him.

At least her confessions never spoke of her trying to steal another wife’s man, or how she murdered her brother - which she had five of, all younger than her, and corrupter, he was sure! - or even just about her problem with the good old wine. She only ever spoke of how she worried about other people and their problems, and how much she dreaded not being able to help them more, feeling like she was desensitizing from them the more she heard.

Ah, she understood it so well.

The same scenario played that day. A farmer’s daughter had become pregnant from a merchant on travel, and she came here in the young lass’ stead to ask for forgiveness. Both of them knew there wasn’t more to do than that, the daughter probably ending up with a bastard’s child and shunned by her own family after all.

“What a pity it is,” the priest spoke, holding away the curtain from the booth to let the woman of his peculiar dreams out. The touch they shared as he held out his hand for her to reach for as she stumbled out of the dark, wooden box, was way too short for his taste.

“Is it, though? Isn’t it wonderful how she’ll experience motherhood?” was her quick and witty response, never having been a girl too shy to say what was on her mind. “Perhaps,” he pressed forth through gritted teeth, having nothing more to say. It should have been his duty to console even people with greater mistakes than an unplanned pregnancy, and he should have been the one to tell this woman of how everyone was supposed to keep themselves pure until marriage. But he wasn’t one to talk back to her, much rather wanting to hear more from her instead of his own voice.

“You have stopped coming to the church lately, has something happened?” he asked. Directly, blunt. Just like he was.

“Oh, Father, I...” Unusual for her, she grew timid, wringing her hands in front of her as she looked down. She always looked as if her mind was far away on a new adventure, but today, she seemed especially reluctant to share what was going on inside her. Their shared walk to the front of the church came to a halt, her back turned away from the door so she could face him, despite not being able to look at him.

He only allowed himself to gaze at her longingly for the moment she wasn’t aware of her eyes on him. She was as pretty as a jewel, as colorful and fun as the trees in fall. People gathered around her, her laugh as sweet as the singing of the birds, with eyes shining like sun rays on top of the ocean. There was nothing more he wished for as to reach out and hold her in his arms, take in her shining aura on top of his dimmed, almost vanished one.

If anything, he was the Hades to her Persephone, characters he only heard about in theatre, though they made so much more sense now. And he wanted her. Wanted her to stay here by his side, in these old, traditional stone walls. It would have been enough if she became what he always thought her to be, a friend to the people, a sister of the order he was under. To serve them and live modestly by his side until death does them part.

“I fear...” she muttered, bringing her hands to her chest. “The reason I cannot come anymore is because...”

She seemed abashed, hurting beneath her sunny exterior. A gasp escaped his mouth as the realization hit him, that in her good will and helpfulness, no one ever seemed to take care of her in return. She was always alone with her own worries and fears. The only time she allowed herself to bring them up was with him, behind the grid of the confession booth. Yes, he understood her. And he understood her reasons. They were the same as his, after all.

No one knew her better than he did.

“No more words,” he ordered strictly as he pulled her to his chest, enveloped her body in his ropes. On his face, a never known warmth spread, his heart filling with joy and adoration, as well as thankfulness for the divine dispensation. “I understand even without you saying it. And I must confess... I feel the same way. I, too, am scared of those feelings I harbor for you, and I fear how the people will react if they find out. But it’s alright, as long as we are together, just like we are meant to from above--”

“But, Sir!” she stirred, pushing away from him and tearing apart the blissful moment of intimacy they shared, leaving a bitter taste on his feelings.

“I do not fear my own feelings! But I fear yours! It’s you I fear the most, Father!”

She was quick to take a few, precautious steps away from her. Her eyebrows were furrowed in concern, hands held up defensively. Just like a deer in the eyes of a predator. But that’s not what he was, right? Yes, he was stern and strict, and sometimes too possessed by old values, but he wasn’t an animal, right? He wouldn’t even kill a fly, much less hurt a person.

Before he could say anything, she turned, her clothes captured by the wind of her motions as if they were taunting him. Taunting him to reach out, to grab her and tear on her, and not let her go. Her arms swang back and forth as she made her way out of the church hurriedly, and she almost succeeded, one hand on the large, cold door handle.

The priest’s grip made her squeak from surprise, his fingers adding a crushing weight on her wrist. She twirled around because she was forced to, not because she wanted, her free hand wrapping around his pleadingly. Just for a moment, their eyes met, and he caught his own reflection in those scared, miserable gems of hers. His expression, the bared teeth, the angry shine in his eyes, the many, many wrinkles in his face of anger, concern, and desperation.

That was the only time that he realized that what she saw wasn’t the town’s priest. To her, he didn’t seem like the person everyone else liked and encouraged her to meet. Even when he thought they were so similar, from their taste in books to their dreams for the village, she had been the only one with keen eyes, purity seeing through all evil that was harbored inside of him.

And it was just her who could see the absolute demon he was.

[kyndaris]

Who Else Will I Have Da-Chao Beans With?

With a brand-new PlayStation 5, lovingly dubbed Seto Kaiba, now in my grasp I was excited to try out Final Fantasy 7 Remake: Intergrade. In particular, the downloadable content (DLC) featuring everyone’s favourite materia hunter: Yuffie Kisaragi. Yes, you heard it right. I suffered through disappointment and numerous attempts of trying to put my name down on a PlayStation 5 waitlist just so that I could play a $30 add-on. I mean, it’s not the first time that I’ve willingly put down money to enjoy more of the story, but it’s a rare occurrence.

With that out of the way, please know that this impression of INTERmission will be filled with spoilers. I know this post won’t go up until August but considering how hard it is to still get consoles, well…you’ve been warned.

In contrast to Cloud’s stoic and no-nonsense attitude, Yuffie is a breath of fresh air. Right from the gates, her narration in a bid to impress the members of Avalanche that aren’t even present is a joy and delight. True, she’s younger than our main character, but she has seen a lot of things. The conflict between Wutai and Shinra back in the good old days of Crisis Core are very much part of the lore in the expanded Final Fantasy 7 universe.

In fact, our favourite puppy of the series, Zack Fair, also got to meet the rising ninja star of Wutai during the conflict.

But I’m getting off-topic. Back to INTERmission.

After traversing the wastelands around Sector 7, Yuffie finally reaches the slums before the plate has fallen. Once she has arrived, she meets up with the members of AVALANCHE. Except, of course, they’re not the ones that we know and love. Enter Zhijie, Nayo, Polk and Billy Bob.

As for Jessie, Biggs and Wedge? All three were located around the slums. Jessie was seated in front of Seventh Heaven (which Yuffie could not enter), Wedge enjoyed the company of many cats and Biggs was idling by not too far from the others. All of them were interactable but their dialogue essentially boiled down to: stop bothering me. I did like, however, being able to play the board game: Fort Condor with at least two of them. AND UTTERLY DESTROYED THEM WHILE I WAS AT IT.

Chadley too, made an appearance – this time offering a battle with Ramuh and also being the GRANDMASTER of the Fort Condor board games.

By the by, the Fort Condor minigame is probably quite reminiscent of the auto-battles that have gained popularity. Three towers to be defended, summonable units…

I’ve never played any of the auto-battles but it does seem fun. For a short while at least. And as a minigame within a game.

Once I had explored the slums to my heart’s content, it was back to the story missions. Enter Sonon. As soon as he appeared, I knew that things would not end well. After all, Yuffie did not have a companion when you met her as an optional side character. And in every other iteration: from Advent Children to Dirge of Cerberus, he was never present.

But though I knew his time would be limited, he brought excellent banter to the adventure and served as an excellent support to Yuffie. Even if the brother-sister connection was a little ham-fisted with Yuffie reminding the warrior of his own sister: Melphi. Still, despite the way the developers bungled the immediate connection, I didn’t mind. Yuffie, after all, was on a mission to nab the greatest and ultimate materia right from under Shinra’s nose.

It is important to know that while not much changes in the way of combat, Yuffie does play quite a bit different from the other main characters. In fact, she can fight both close-up and at range with her ninjutsu arts. Another change to the formula is that you cannot change to Sonon. Only Yuffie can be controlled – though you can give commands to Sonon and have him perform abilities and spells.

Then, of course, there’s also the synergy aspect wherein Sonon and Yuffie would combine their attacks to deal additional damage. It was fun experimenting with the system and showed how versatile the combat system could be.

Once they enjoyed a trip chasing Zhijie to obtain High-D cards that would allow them to slip into Shinra Headquarters, it was back to the slums to see Tifa and Barret return without SOLDIER-boy Cloud Strife. What I loved about this moment was that we also got to see a private conversation between Tifa and Barret that did not feature in the first game or in the Remake run. Seeing the aftermath of Cloud falling down into the slums below and how it had impacted both Tifa and Barret was a great character moment. And it also helped serve to explain the reason why Tifa ended up in Wall Market in the first place.

With that moment out of the way, our heroes Yuffie and Sonon head to Shinra headquarters. As they slip into the elevator, they are joined by Scarlet: Head of Weapons Development. From there, the game becomes a gauntlet of battles. It’s not the most thrilling chapter to experience but it does showcase how well the Wutaians fight and the innate teamwork between Yuffie and Sonon.

This new piece of downloadable content, however, is not satisfied to simply end matters here, however. When Scarlet is defeated (and even in defeat she’s assessing how best to finetune her machines of war), she activates DEEPGROUND. For the first time in a long while, I got to see Weiss the Immaculate and Nero the Sable.

While I may not have played Dirge of Cerberus, I did watch ALL the walkthroughs that I could find on YouTube back in my younger years. I watched Vincent Valentine grapple with his past and finally learn to control the power within.

That aside, the new threat that Nero presented was a challenge. With his arms strapped to his chest in a straitjacket, he reminded me of Anima Aeon from Final Fantasy X. But it was his darkness powerset that gave me all the Kingdom Hearts vibes. If I have to hear ‘Darkness’ again in anything, I think I might have to scream.

Beyond these few nitpick moments, I felt that Sonon’s death was a little overdone. Particularly for a character that had only been fighting beside us for only a few short moments. Don’t get me wrong, the developers tried their best to sell it: the swell in the orchestra, the use of copious flashbacks…

Still, the pain expressed by Yuffie (which was then followed by the Sector 7 plate falling) was enough to sell a bit of the horror.

My only question though is: WHAT IS NERO GOING TO DO WITH SONON’S BODY?

From there, the credits rolled and we caught a glimpse of Yuffie out in the wilds, on a chocobo and humming. As a side note, does everyone know the chocobo theme song? Is it a piece of canonical music within the game universe that is associated with chocobos? Like, is it used in advertisement for chocobos? I NEED TO KNOW!

We also get to see Barret, Tifa, Aerith and Cloud traipsing along on the road to Kalm. Better than that, we see Zack in his alternate dimension reaching the church in the Sector 5 slums, debating how best to reintroduce himself to his fair flower lady. Where is his version of Cloud in all this? Why are there so many people in the church? How does this whole dimension/ alternate timeline thing work?

Once again, the Final Fantasy 7 Remake left me with more questions than answers. Though I never played the original, over the years, I had scoured the wiki sites to learn as much as I could. And though I knew the plot beats, the creative directors and script writer have kept things close to the vest – tantalising me with the prospect of what is to come.

I still need a slap fight between Scarlet and Tifa, okay! It had better be in there!

[madamhatter]

koagema inquired: resting her chin on her hand, chiaki nanami spaces off as a loving smile settled into her features. she’s got it bad— though... it’s not like anything’s gonna happen. she’s too childish to be with her classmate, she thinks. and yet, she also muses, “i’d count your freckles all day and trace constellations if you’d let me.” ... shit. her mouth moved, right? “... fuck. did i say that out loud...?” UNPROMPTED ASKS | ALWAYS WELCOMED | @koagema

Filling her stomach by 12:30 PM was unheard of for Sophie Hatter. No less, having company and lunch while on a break -- mandated by a certain hypocritical someone -- only weighed the Hatter down with hesitance in overall agreeing to these terms. Throwing herself and letting her thoughts be blown away by the blustering winds of tidiness and over-preparedness, the fact that she was human oft lost in the turbulence. 

However, it was nice to be reminded sometimes. 

Basking underneath the sunlight, Sophie sat underneath a large tree with branches extended out, twisted and turn in the air, with their healthy green leaves providing some patchy shade. A large and roughly sketched-on campus rested on her lap as she taps her pencil against the page. With her right hand, her fingers rhythmically run up and down against the ceramic wrapper of her sandwich. Not too far from the barely bitten-into sandwich was her treasure cove of artist supplies in a gray pouch. Grumbling to herself, she wrinkles her nose and taps the front of her foot against the pavement. 

What to do? When would the hidden spring of inspiration be struck? I shouldn’t even be out here when I need to finish this... Fumbled together and tangled like yarn balls, her thoughts knotted and twisted with no relief in sight. If only I was in the workshop, I’ll be able to pull out old designs, photographs, just anything to get this blasted mind of mine working. All the fabric, the accessories, the feathers, the fake flowers, ribbons. I shouldn’t even be out here if I’m doing this terribly. I don’t deserve to be. God damn it.

A sharp breath left through her flared nostrils. She slowly turns, dropping the pencil into her pouch, murmuring something both very crass and very English under her soured breath. Shaking her head and returning to position, Sophie’s eyelids lower at the sight of unfinished work.  She takes another breath, letting the warm air fill her chest, as she forcefully retires the pad to empty space to her side. 

Yet, she glances to her left-hand side, remembering exactly why she was out here and why she didn’t deserve to be. Chiaki Nanami, with eyes cooler than the sun setting yet with a smile warmer than the sun rising. Chiaki Nanami, with a touch barely noticeable yet as soft and careful, even inviting almost, as she would recline and lean against her shoulder or back with some hidden demand for attention. Chiaki Nanami, a guilty-pleasure of sweetness for someone who couldn’t handle sugar, yet with a surprising kick of heat as griping and exciting that overtook her. 

It was all trivial to define what she made her feel, for all the words she would’ve woven cannot compare. She must admit, it was as if flowers blossomed in her pathetic empty rib-cage whenever she found herself watching, learning, and all the more adoring Chiaki. 

Spending nights in the dormitory, attentive to Chiaki’s thorough explanations of ‘game routing’ between the utterances of curses and rapid button tapping, sometimes laying by her side. Those conversations expanded beyond their talents too, beyond tangled console wires and yarn strings. The class representative certainly had many stories to share when it came to Class 77-B too -- just how her eyes danced around with the liveliness in her retellings, not shying from adding some imitations of her classmates. Yet, that wasn’t all.

In the rare chance that the hatter found herself in her true calling, flowers and floral arrangement, even the Gamer lingered in her thoughts. In the greenhouse on campus, while Sophie would find herself trimming and caring for the flowers, occasionally making conversation with them, the back of her mind re-imagined each reference she could from Chiaki.  

Her past was engulfed by an overgrowth of vines, wildflowers, and shrubs that grew taller by each day. Like a labyrinth with marble pillars, tall and daunting, at its entrance, the maze of knowing the gamer was wandering challenge. Yet, as little as she disclosed to Sophie, there were hints throughout that maze, a trail of pink rose petals that led her further and further each day.

When it came to flowers like lavenders and white lilies, how their scent perfumed Sophie’s cardigan after working in the gardens, Chiaki lurked and nestled herself into the fabric that rested on her shoulders. All surprising to the hatter, it was all the more comforting after the immediate pang of fear. Once she’d see the top of those pink curls, she settled back into her spot. 

Yet, it was those same scents that led to the smallest insights -- like sunlight bleeding through the thick and overhead vines over the labyrinth. As the flora perfumed her, and the gamer nestled, Chiaki would often mutter small facts -- hanakotoba, how each flower speaks a different emotion and expression. From what little the hatter could see over her shoulder whenever the other spoke, she could at least tell that her pale pink eyes would look left. Recalling memories, trying to find what was once in her mind, that’s what it meant to look in that direction. 

It was never direct, never too obvious the direction her memories went. Never a specific time or place, or people involved, but what lingered was happiness and it prevailed through what she shared. Yet, even in the warmth of the sun, a shadow of doubt was cast. 

A reluctance hidden underneath her words -- Sophie wasn’t ignorant, she was raised under the eyes liars and manipulators, she knows how carefulness was an essential trait for some to survive. She wasn’t any different. Encroaching on such sensitive topics wasn’t ever acceptable one as nosy and inquisitive as the eldest of three. Yet, to assume that there was strife in the other’s background was as bad as assuming altogether -- it isn’t of her power nor judgment to impose that onto her. 

Regardless her roots, she blossomed all the more beautiful, Sophie concludes. earthly irises remaining on the posied irises of the other, heavenly sigh leaving her lips. And no matter how she looked, or how she spoke...it all didn’t matter for one reason.

Importantly, it was kind. 

Outside of the endless trove of internal monologue that warped her to a different plane of existence, the two students were aimlessly gazing at another. However, it was apparent that one was more vocal, if not, having a chest full of dove feathers and lips full of yearning, heart-felt sighs. 

< i’d count your freckles all day and trace constellations if you’d let me. >

Sophie immediately, blinks, fixated back on the class representative. Not a flinch and response, she remains with her brows lowered and her hands, now folded, rest on top of her lap. Unlike the regretful student, she was as unresponsive and downright confused by the string of words that left Chiaki’s mouth. 

Her finger slowly curls outwards, about to speak. Befuddled by the slow comprehension coming to play, she frowns shortly. Why was it that she had to bring up those nasty little dots? She pondered, trying to look down to her nose. But, being cross-eyed wasn’t what she wanted to look like in front of her friend.  

< ... fuck. did i say that out loud...?>

“...Miss Nanami, someone of your position should be careful with such vulgarities. What if one of your classmates, or even your homeroom teacher, caught wind of what you said?” Sophie continues with conversation, leaving the elephant in the room to starve. “You should be sure to finish your lunch if you’re going to continue staring off. You’re, after all, the model student for 77-B.” 

[hvmanbeing]

Neopian Gothic III

you are nine when you make your first neopet, and you are fifty six when the Earth is abandoned.

a husk, consumed, now the third desolate rock in a chain of desolate rocks orbiting a star; one, that in of itself, was so tainted by human tampering that staying within the solar system was hazardous.

yet, you quantify your terrestrial lifespan by the age of your digital pets. some would consider that odd, but nowadays you seek nostalgic comfort in anything from Earth.

it’s remarkable that anyone bothered to back up Neopets to the cultural archive servers. you sometimes wonder about the cultural items deemed less worthy than a petsite abandoned in 2040. who’s life work was lost because a website where you can eat literal shit was prioritized?

dwelling on it fills you with some emotion you cant quite name.

you pay it no mind. as you sit at the console in your narrow living space, you access the backup servers and try to log in. passwords are trickier now, it’s hard to get into the mindset you were at when you last joined. the you who lived thirty some odd years ago evidently thought the account’s security was so vital that you changed the it from the password you’ve used your whole life. frustrating.

maybe it was hacked. whatever.

after a few attempts you call it quits. you make a fresh account because, frankly, what else are you going to do in your free time? stare into space? actually work? fat chance.

immediately you look up your old account. everyone is still there. still wearing what they last wore. it’s like looking at a snapshot of your young adult life. sleek, clean CSS on your lookup, marred by the occasional broken image, chunks of corrupted text, but otherwise intact.

your pets are hungry. you wish you could feed them.

you look up the accounts of a few of your old friends. everything is still the same there too, at least for the unfrozen few. you let out a breathy sigh at some of these old usernames. you wonder if they made it off the planet.

clicking away, you are disquieted by the unchanging nature of the site. so much has changed for you, do your pets even experience time?

you chuckle quietly at that last question. Neopets never chased the AI train when it eventually reached the virtual pet market. after the shitshow that was the flash conversion, they never bothered to do any overhauls more complex than a code copy-paste. as you do your dailies, the flashing of webpages loading and unloading between win states wears on your eyes. you look away from the site. the night lighting has been turned on. how long have you been here? clearly your pets don’t experience time any better than you do, you think.

looking back at the console, you linger for a few seconds, before you log off and climb into your bunk.

your pets are hungry. this slips from your mind as you slip from conciousness.

the years crawl on, the emptiness of space makes time stretch relative to the human mind. it’s a lot harder to feel like days have passed when you don’t have a sun, or a moon, or a sky to remind you that time even is a thing.

it has been many years since you’ve thought of your Neopets. you logged on once in a while to check on your new account, play some games, and chat with the few remaining players on the colony’s ships. those days are long gone.

but now, as you’re laying in the medic bay, feeling increasingly weak, a rather unusual thought crosses your mind.

your Neopets are going to outlive you.

for some reason, this thought makes your skin crawl.

but on some basal level, something tells you that you’re not wrong.

days later, when the light leaves your eyes, and the recycled air leaves your lungs, the statement gains truth.

your pets are hungry. you can no longer feed them.

the idea that — after leaving the Earth — a new home planet could be secured used to be something constant, reassuring. years of pop culture and layman science lead everyone to believe it was a simple eventuality.

but it has been 130 years since humanity left Earth, and no planet has been satisfactory.

the population of the colony has sharply declined, those raised in space do not wish to inflict the same strife upon children of their own.

and as time stretches into nothingness, that decline reached it’s natural resting point at absolute zero. there is nobody left aboard the ships. they remain piloted by the on-board AI, who was never programmed to deal with the total collapse of the colony.

they were built to practically run without any humans, after all, so they didn’t even notice when the virtual manifest read as empty.

so they carry on, into the empty vastness of space.

the only evidence that thousands of years are passing by is the ever decaying behaviors of the AI. they feedback on themselves, winding down an endless repeating logic loop. but even when the AI eventually fail, the few ships caught in the larange points of distant stars collect enough energy to remain online.

your pets are hungry. there is no one to feed them.

and so as entropy becomes more violent, and the stars slowly start to blink out of the night sky, there is no one to witness it. except for your pets.

locked in a hibernal state, unable to affect their environment but at it’s total mercy. the eternally undying “dying”. perhaps, were there anyone left, they would observe this truly wretched state. your pets are cursed, purgatorian resident remnants of a civilization dead for millennia.

and yet, they stand stalwart, paragons of eternity. unchanging. despite their fellow sites slowly fading off of the serverbanks as their AI turn cannibalistic, they remain. conceivably, one could argue it was TNT’s refusal to update that ultimately saved them. if they adopted a hokey AI system, maybe they would’ve been released long ago.

the suns they orbit begin to rot. some ships manage to break free as the star’s gravitational pull fluctuates, barely escaping as they self destruct and are reborn as dwarfs.

set adrift in an ever darker space, the distant explosions of star systems offering the only change of scenery, they still persist. gnawing, ever present hunger does nothing to their digital bodies.

when the ships lose power, and become no more than space debris, the pets remain in their serverbanks.

even trillions upon trillions of years later, when the ships remain fetid fixtures in the vaccum of a cold universe, the servers survive. they were built with the intention to last forever, hypothetically, in the hopes that our accomplishments would outlast us in a worst case scenario.

how naive it was, to believe there was anything out there other than us, even more naive to believe that, had they existed, they’d take any interest in what we had to offer.

the pull of black holes begin to draw what remains of the universe into their infinitely dense maws.

the ships and dislodged servers are not immune.

at the end of everything, your pet is still hungry.

they bare witness to the heat death of the universe, the final act of consumption.

someone might find that ironic, if there was anyone left alive. someone else might find it completely inconsequential. they would probably fight about the metaphysical meaning of this event.

as the serverbanks tumble inward, parts being rend from parts, the final physical form of your pets is destroyed, flattened into a molecule thin sheet of raw matter. they don’t even get to see the event horizon.

as the black holes consume one another, there is nothing left. only the most base elements remain; just particles of light, nothing that could be seen as matter.

but.

data, at it’s raw level, is never lost. although what encased it may be gone, the points that made it up still exist within the abstract arbitration of the universe. finite particles coming into existence randomly arrange themselves in a pattern that resembles the binary code of your pets, before casting themselves out of existance once again. for the briefest of femtoseconds, it is as though your pet still lives. this happens, sporadically and increasingly rarely, as the universe cools to a consistent temperature.

then finally. after an inconceivable time since your death;

the universe is empty. and your pets are hungry.

[perfect-corroscience]

Chapter 37: In Devil’s Grip

“An abyss which in our language is called shin’en.”

37-1 Raining down like a hailstorm.

This chapter throws Graviton enemies at you. Luckily, I was able to roll Iskar, an A-class Photon unit, when the Wild Beast adventurers got introduced. I know people at the time were pissed that there were lower class units (which would dilute the pool) but… look, not everyone would whale for the higher units nor has the patience to max SB/Luck everyone.

In lieu of not having A’misandra nor Amina, I maxed out the Whitewyrm Wand and stuck it on Zafitte^ to make her something of a healer. The otomo casts Tera Heal, chain; so with that and Giga Regen, my party won’t be hurting for healing.

Someone asked me if I’ll tackle the two Animata bosses. I did fight them, but I dunno if I’ll post up any updates about them. Probably not.

It starts with a small number of these new enemies.

Pretty self-explanatory, I think.

I do like how you can see the two black Animatas in this stage’s background.

37-2 Scorching barrier stretched across the sky.

Nothing good, evidently. Anyway, in this stage twisters will spawn as you progress through it, starting with this one, adding one more as you move on,

and ending with four on the field.

37-3 A sharp gaze drilling into his back.

The whispering leader sensed a sharp gaze

drilling into his back. It was Pa'keppar.

 “Chief! How long do you plan to go on hiding here?!”

We’re introduced to some new enemies.

The Incapacitators, who only attack rows

...and Fragmentors, whose Powered Point Jammer skill will make the bar charge slower than normal for three turns.

37-4 Want us to stand back and do nothing?

A fallen Spirit with burned wings and

molten Negas lay in front of you.

 They sacrificed themselves to destroy

the barrier generator.

 “Why have you done this... for us?”

 No one could have known the answer.

All that remained was the path these

unexpected benefactors had given

their lives to clear for you.

 ---Audience room

 "While we're talking here, much blood may be

getting spilled, all for our sake! Chief, how can

you be so insensitive to their suffering?"

 "Thanks to their sacrifice, peace will be

brought to our lands, and we will be protected.

There is no better solution."

"You really think that?! You trust the word of

a devil who leaves death in her wake, and

want us to stand back and do nothing?"

 "Would you rather send our people to certain

death? I don't understand you, Pa'keppar!"

 "And these strangers who throw away their

lives for us, do they not matter to you?!"

Four of the five fights here are against the level 79 Incapacitators.

Finally, for the last floor, there is a stronger Incapacitator. Three rows! Golly!

37-5 Became tears that fell from his eyes.

It’s noble of them, but certainly foolhardy. Still, it’s good to know there are people who are behind the crew’s backs.

The fights here are against Incapacitators and Fragmentors.

37-6 Filled with the remnants of unconscious feelings…

And we meet, and get a name for, the second riftworlder.

There are only three battles, but there are a decent number of enemies. The twisters are more of an annoyance, but it’s still something to look out for.

Especially in cases like this.

Poor Bahl was on the verge of death when I cleared this part of the stage.

I guess if you’re not aware of the other floor positions or you like to clump your units together, the twisters could make moving them around a little annoying.

37-7 Come forth into this world!

“What did you create using the Animata?”

“Create?”

“Heheh... You don't know? I will show you.”

 The man cut off a cube of space and blew into it.

Smoke began to fill it, turning from grey

to purple, and then to green.

 “The life breeder hatched something interesting...”

 An awful sound, like scraping metal,

sounded. It echoed through the ground,

vibrating everything.

 “Come forth into this world!”

 The smoke-filled cube burst open, flesh

and mechanical parts combining into

some kind of bio-machine weapon.

Despite the story, we won’t see anything new in terms of enemies. Maybe it’s just to demonstrate that all the enemies the party’s been fighting were all Shin’en’s creations. Anyway, have a screenshot of Zafitte^’s Heigh-Ho attacks.

37-8 Horrified by how frozen solid she was.

Yeah, Mutoh is not a good person. This is of course meant to be tragic, but I feel it’d have a bit more of an oomph if we got to see what poor To’toa looked like.

The party, of course, has no idea that this is all happening. They’re still fighting off Incapacitators and Fragmentors.

37-9 I have a bad feeling about this.

---Battlefield

 "Now I must go. I want to get good

seats for the wonderful show!"

 The man disappeared. As if pulled by

a string, the remaining feathers flew

up and drifted back to the ground.

 "Where the hell did he go?"

 The battle ended suddenly.

“No! Don't do that!”

 The lizard chief never noticed that all his

actions played right into the demons' hands.

 Now, the planet's power which had long been

dormant would be unleashed.

 It came dancing down from the sky,

penetrated the ground and spread far and

wide, just as the demons wanted.

---Battlefield

 The ground shook with a rumble.

"What is it this time? This noise is horrific..."

 The ground split, and mystical light spilled

out from the chasm.

The light resonated with the two Animatas

sailing the skies in the distance.

 "I have a bad feeling about this."

So, 37-9 has only three battles, but the light mentioned in the pre-battle text isn’t just for fluff.

This line from, presumably, Mutoh, leads into a gimmick that this stage has. Every turn, the light mentioned earlier will blind the party and do 500 damage to them. It’s not too serious and can be healed off easily, but it’s something to be aware of, nonetheless.

Here’s a nice screenshot of what Graviton attacks look like, as well as the stage gimmick. Anyway, for the first two fights, it’s against the usual enemies.

And here is the boss of this part, Energos. Supergravity Breath is a 3x multiplier attack that also displaces your units, while Gravitonball is a 2x Graviton and weapon (staff) attack.

From my notes, Energos seems to consistently follow a pattern as such:

1. Supergravity Breath, Area (1) > Move

2. Supergravity Breath, Ring > summon reinforcements (2x Fragmentor lv 77) > Move

3. Supergravity Breath, Area 1 > Move

4. Repeat

Definitely make sure you clear out the adds as they come in, so you don’t get overwhelmed.

I believe that once you knock Energos’ health down to around 50ish%, it will start using Gravitonball, which will hit two of your units – for my run here, it started doing so at 99665/205790 HP. The wiki notes its skillset has stuff like Gravitonball (2), (3), etc. that seem to imply that as it gets weaker, Gravitonball will begin hitting more of your party until it’s attacking everyone.

Energos will continue to do its thing, by the way. But if you managed to wear it down to this point, you can finish it off. Of course, if you so wished (and had the units), you could use tap skills to one-shot it from full health.

37-10 Before you could answer, you were hit by an infernal heat wave.

So. Going into this, I have to admit I was a little worried because Iskar was my only Photon unit. But then RNGesus smiled upon me:

And I rolled her! So, not only is Sayu a great mage, but I think her character design is pretty great! (On the other hand, I don’t care for her recode’s art. It is obviously fanservice-y design, but I felt that it came at the cost of being creative.) When she was released, Sayu was actually one of my white whales for Terra Battle and I’m stoked that I managed to roll her.

I also managed to roll Kir’ue, an SS class unit who debuted same time as Iskar. The more the merrier, really! I won’t complain about having another person to cover Photon.

Some had wounds so grievous they were

unable to move at all.

 The harbinger of death shook the world,

settling down right in front of the you.

Its dark aura filled those who witnessed

it with fear.

 As you stopped to catch your breath,

you were just about to be assaulted by

yet another vicious heat wave when

someone called out...

 “Everyone, get back!”

 Hearing the voice, you jumped back and

dodged the heat beam by the smallest

of margins.

 “Pa'keppar, why are you here?!”

“I will explain later. For now, we must

stop that!”

For 37-10, you get a pretty interesting little mechanic here. This message pops up – in a display of unity for their fellows on this planet, any Lizardfolk units you have will have their attacking stats buffed by 1.3x, and their defensives buffed by 1.5x.

Compare S’naip^’s normal stats at level 90: 434 Attk, 245 MAttk, 291 Def, 254 MDef. It’s a pretty nifty buff, and it’s worth packing a Lizardfolk party, though as you can see I only brought S’naip along. This is partly because I didn’t really have a lot of good Lizardfolk units, and I felt Ma’curi might still be a bit fragile even with the buffs.

There are three battles; the first two are against the usual enemies. They aren’t too bad, but the twisters can be annoying if your units get knocked into them.

For the third battle, the boss is faced – Relic.

Relic follows a pattern, as well:

1. Supergravity Breath (SGB), 1 column > Move

2. Synergy Wave, 1 row > Move

3. Axionball > Move > Summons a Fragmentor

4. Repeat?

5. SGB, 1 column

6. Synergy Wave

While Relic won’t summon back the other adds, the Fragmentor’s Powered Point Jammer is annoying, so definitely kill them.

As you weaken Relic, it will add moves to its pattern.

7. SGB, Border - did this @ 205471/308420 HP

8. SGB, column

9. Synergy Wave

10. Energy Emission, All + Fragmentor summoned

Just keep at it and you’ll make it through.

  Their only consolation lay in the fact

that even after being toyed with by

malicious beings, Pa'keppar's group's

spirit wasn't broken.

 Although the two devils plaguing their

planet are not gone for good, for now

at least the Lizardfolk can enjoy a brief

respite from terror and strife.

 Pa'keppar spoke in a voice strong and

filled with resolve.

 “We will pull through. We will never

give in! And one day we will reclaim

our skies!”

 So what was the meaning of that encounter?

The lizard planet has a long and sordid history

of sacrificing lives and grudge-bearing, and

history likes to repeat itself.

 What was it all for?

 “If you find others in the same predicament

as ours, please help them like you helped us.”

 The only thing that can be said with any

certainty is that in this endless universe,

there are many other tribes and Animatas

that you have not yet come across.

So I had the feeling this is an in-story nod to the recoding mechanics. It’s just a little strange that it pops up now instead of earlier, given you get access to recoding as soon as you clear chapter 20. And prior to lambdas getting removed from the pool, you could roll them from the Pact of Truth... Oh well. With the threat to the Lizardfolk world beat back, so ends chapter 37. 

Next time: grief.

[cassfics]

Party’s Over

On The Cover: Darren, William, Piero, and The Bearoness are all dressed as various video game characters. A dark shadow looms behind them, tendrils reaching out. The tagline reads: "Can they survive this interpersonal strife, or will they find out that the PARTY'S OVER"

Piero threw themself back on the couch, exhausted from the extensive use of their powers. They focused on the feeling of one of the few real things in the newly decorated house.

"I gotta say, this place is really coming together!"

William entered in from the kitchen, "Although, I don't understand why you went with such an old television. Couldn't you mime up a flatscreen?"

The ever silent Piero simply shrugged and rolled over to make room for their originally uninvited housemate. Even if William was a somewhat spoiled, disowned heir of one of the most powerful families in Apex City, he did at least get them some furniture, and sitting on a real chair was nice sometimes. 

"They should be here any minute" William said, adjusting his tie. Despite this being simply being a night for friends to hang out, he was adamant about dressing nice, as he was taught all hosts should. Piero was simply wearing their regular outfit.

As if to punctuate the sentence, there was a knock at the door. William took a deep breath and opened the door revealing Darren, wearing a colorful sweater and carrying a large pitcher of Brown Liquid.

"I understand that the Natural Waters I brought to the picnic are not, in fact, ideal for humans. So this time I have brought tea. It is also filled with plants." She lifted the pitcher as she entered. William took it and put it in the cooler of ice that he had prepared for the other drinks. He figured Piero had enough to do making the entertainment and didn't need to make a refrigerator on top of that.

Darren gently sat next to Piero on the couch, "I see that Jackie has not yet arrived?"

Piero simply shook their head no, but was interrupted as the door suddenly burst open! A large Robo-Bear in modified COPI hoodie came charging in carrying a bag full of various snack foods. The bag was immediately dropped unceremoniously on the ground. "Hey Guys!!! I had Static Jacques pick up some snacks that are good for parties!"

"Oh, is he coming?" William said, clearly nervous about having an unexpected guest show up.

"No, why would he?" replied The Bearoness, continuing to be oblivious to Jacques' feelings.

Sensing the coming awkward silence, Piero began handing out imaginary controllers and gesturing for people to take their seats. William and Piero took their spots on opposite sides of the couch with Darren between them and Jackie sitting on the floor in front of her.

"So William, you said something about a Team Building exercise? Is that what this strange device is for?" Darren asked, trying to figure out what the three-pronged device she had been handed was.

The Bearoness chimed in, "Yeah, even if I had human hands, I don't think I could hold this"

"We will be partaking in the greatest team-building exercise of all time: Playing Video Games!" William said, a hint of ironic nobility tinting his voice

Sudden recognition hit Darren's face "Oh! So this is a Videos Game? I have heard Officer Darren's Spores talk about them quite often."

William looked to Piero, realizing he forgot a vital piece of information, "Which game did you mime up anyways?"

The Mime snapped their fingers.

It was Mario Party.

William's face went pale, then quickly changed to a face of exasperation. "Really? Again?"

Piero simply gave a smirk and an over-exaggerated shrug.

After an extended explanation of the rules of the game from William and Piero (but mostly William), it was time to select characters. The clacking of sticks filled the air as the two housemates fought to lay claim to their favorite green dinosaur. Thanks to their position as Player 2, Piero emerged victorious once again.

"This Princess Toadstool, is she a human? or is she also from a different planet?" asked a particularly puzzled Darren.

"I always thought she was a peach, or maybe it was a strawberry?" suggested Jackie, carefully tapping a button to select Donkey Kong.

William sighed as he resigned to selecting Mario "I'm not sure any of these characters are human"

---Turn 1---

The Bearoness looked down at the imaginary pile of plastic under their paws, “Uh, I think I broke this controller by mashing too hard during that game. That and being a rad as heck Cy-Bear. Do you think you can put together something a little more sturdy? Maybe a bit bigger?”

Piero concentrated for a second and wiggled their fingers around as they mimed up a third-party controller.

“Oh sweet! Mad Catz!” The Bearoness exclaimed as they gave the larger buttons a test with their claws.

---Turn 5---

“Hahaaa! My path to victory has only just begun!” shouted William, striking a pose.

Jackie began chuckling menacingly, “We’ll see about that! It looks like the next star is right in front of me!”

Piero used this distraction to mime a shepherd's crook and steal the Party Sized Doritos, only to make direct eye-contact with Darren. A second passed. They handed the alien visitor a chip and nodded. A contract was signed.

---Turn 17---

A belch rang out, followed by a small cloud of spores. “This shopkeeper, they are giving me conflicting feelings. However, I am enthralled by this magical lamp of his.” remarked Darren, hair tendrils slipping further into a can of Baja Blast.

“How long is this game anyways?” The Bearoness managed to ask between attempts to open a bag of Twizzlers with their mouth.

William looked over at Piero. Piero opened another can of seltzer. William sighed loudly.

---Turn 28---

“Piero, I swear if you use another one of those ghosts on me, I will make sure *both* of us are destroyed!” growled Jackie at a smirking Piero.

The crinkling of plastic filled the air as William opened a Cosmic Brownie. “Please, by all means, take each other out. Cement my victory!”

---Turn 36---

“Hey, Darren, you alright? It’s your turn.” William said as Piero gently shook the cheese-dust covered alien. Darren slowly stirred and looked around at her surroundings.

“Huh? Oh, sorry. I must have dozed off…” she said, slowly while picking her controller back up. It was now upside down.

--Turn 48---

Nearing the end of the game, William had maintained his lead, mostly due to The Bearoness and Piero spending 20 turns stealing coins and stars from each other. However, Darren was only star behind.

Unfortunately, the next star was on the other side of the map.

Just as Darren was about to start their turn, Piero jumped up off the couch and started animatedly gesturing to get her attention.

“What? Oh. Oh! OH! The Lamp!” Darren excitedly navigated the menu as she realized what Piero was “saying”.

William stood up in shock, “No! No Way! Impossible! I refuse to believe this!”

Within moments, the Mushroom Genie had whisked the Princess into a tie for First Place in this, The Ultimate Battle.

--The Super Star--

The last 10 minutes of the Final Turns felt like an Eternity. Despite all of his best efforts, and Darren being mostly asleep on the befurred back of The Bearoness, William still remained tied with his closest competition. And yet…

It was time to find out who was the Super Star.

But first! Bonus Stars had to be distributed! Piero began a drumroll on an imagined snare, causing The Bearoness to jolt to attention and knocking their plant-based friend to the floor. William’s knuckles grew white as he clutched the controller.

The Bonus Star for Most Mini Games Won goes to… Yoshi!

The Demon Summoner’s grip on his controller loosened, but only slightly. Sure, Piero was so far behind that the bonus star wouldn’t make a difference, but he was still stuck in a tie.

The Bonus Star for Most Coins Collected goes to… Mario!

William completely dropped his controller as he raised his hands in victory! “Finally! My victory is here at last!”

His celebration was cut short by Piero tapping him on the shoulder and pointing back to the screen. William froze as he saw what was happening.

The Bonus Star for Most Event Spaces goes to… Princess Peach!

William remained motionless as the Resident Mime started laughing. Darren was still fast asleep on the floor with The Bearoness curled up around her.

Piero decided it would probably be best to end the game now before William was broken completely. They dispelled the screen and console as their roommate finally just sank into the couch, unsure of what the outcome would have been. They mimed up some blankets and pillows to make sure their guests would be comfortable when they woke.

The Party was over.

[theunderneath67]

~II~

Night, welcome art thou to my minde distrest,

Darke, heauy, sad, yet not more sad then I:

Neuer could’st thou find fitter company

For thine owne humour, then I thus opprest.

If thou beest darke, my wrongs still vnredrest

Saw neuer light, nor smallest blisse can spye:

If heauy ioy from me too fast doth hie,

And care out-goes my hope of quiet rest.

Then now in friendship ioyne with haplesse me,

Who am as sad and darke as thou canst be,

Hating all pleasure or delight of lyfe,

Silence, and griefe, with thee I best doe loue.

And from you three I know I can not moue,

Then let vs liue companions without strife.

-Lady Mary Wroth, Sonnet 37(2)

Dani Hillsbrough, the real world human behind the Elizabeth Forrester avatar, suddenly found herself back in the warm, expansive, antiquated and comfortably familiar library that served as the main menu and entry/exit point for users of the SimuLife console. Shelves, overflowing with books of popular and obscure titles by renowned and unknown authors filled the library reached colossally high to a ceiling out of view and impossibly wide to an unseen horizon. Avatars of other players and fill-in background characters dressed in the various costumes of eras near and far, fact and fiction mixed with the avatars of staff, easily marked with the familiar blue/grey cardigan adorned with the NetNeurality (the mother company of the SimuLife console) logo and assorted non-player characters to form a bustling community of citizens in this ersatz commonwealth that was the SimuLife populace.

A young woman, in her NetNeurality branded sweater, approached Dani, “Welcome back. I’m Annie, an assistant here at the library.  I hope you enjoyed your time at Castle Tarleton. It’s always one of our more popular communities. Would you like to start a new adventure in Reinvent:Yourself!, start a new replay in Destination:Anywhere, continue a previous adventure or sign off?”

“Sign off,” Dani replied simply.

“Very good, “said Annie, “This way.”

With a wave of Annie’s hand, a door opened streaming a ray of intensely bright light from floor to ceiling, again impossibly high to see to the top. Dani stepped through. That same familiar melody she heard as Elizabeth was turning played in her ear. The words, “REMOVE HEADSET”, flashed red slowly in front of her eyes and a small timer counted down from five to zero underneath. At zero, the melody stopped and the screen on her visor went dark.

Dani removed her SimuLife headset and sat for a moment, reminiscing her time in the world of the NetNeurality servers. While the characters that she used more frequently within the confines of Reinvent:Yourself!, itself, were more a means to an end, Dani found that she looked forward to playing Elizabeth more than any other. It was without question her favorite avatar in SimuLife. Elizabeth Forrester, the demure, naïve yet wanton medieval vampires-in-training, was, surely, not one of her more profitable characters in the world of virtual courtesans and, definitely, not quite as adventurous as some of the more wild experiences she had on the NetNeurality servers. Elizabeth, however, brought out the vulnerable, playful side in Dani’s personality that she was never seemingly able to naturally break out enough in ‘the real world”.

The bread and butter for Dani, financially anyway, were the straightforward sex kittens like Oola, the amazonian princess who relished public humiliation and haughtiness and then publicly and privately humiliated and totured countless alpha male businessmen on Catalonia, the SciFi adventure set on the titular far away fictional planet, or Tiffany, the unattainable cheerleader that gave sneaky blowjobs in the back of math class in exchange for an “A” to the creepy older guys. They weren’t interesting characters. They were simple cardboard cutout caricatures. They didn’t have depth or a sense beyond what they were, online hookers. Elizabeth Forrester, on the other hand, was a pleasant change of pace. Elizabeth had… depth. She had a soul.

So, for as much as she loved Elizabeth, Elizabeth was a rare treat. Elizabeth couldn’t offer the pragmatic, economic success that those other one-dimensional characters could. Those quick regular sessions provided the extras that her day job couldn’t. They provided the upgraded apartment. They provided the upscale lingerie and undergarments. They provided the lunches and the vacations and the trips home to check on the family. Her day job covered rent, and utilities and car payments, etc.; but, the extras came from the likes of the dominant princess and the naughty cheerleader.

Shaking her fully awake and aware, an alarm sounded 7AM from across the room. With a heavy sigh, Dani said out loud to no one in particular, “Welp, guess it’s time to pay the bills.”

Rising up from her console integrated SimuLife bench, Dani crossed her room, shut off the alarm, and began the morning ritual in getting ready for her day. Though she lamented having to set aside Elizabeth and Elizabeth’s next adventure, she knew it would have to wait until notification arrived in her Bitcoin account that payment had been received from her mysterious client. Real life had called and her employer had a strict logging in policy. NetNeurality, with whom she was not just an avid customer but also a long time employee, had just promoted her as the newest member of their systems testing team. She was acutely aware of her need to “go the extra mile” in terms of following the rules and setting a high standard. Besides, today was the day they let her start her own test cases and she had some clever ideas for Destination: Anywhere testing and wanted to spend her Friday having them solidly put together and approved before running them on Monday.

Dani was excited about this new position. It was, coincidentally, within a few days of a sidetracked conversation with the man she knew as The Shadow that had started with setting up this morning’s meeting and ended up diverting into commiserating about unfulfilling and underwhelming career tracks and the lack of opportunity for improvement that Dani had noticed the posting for a new tester in NetNeurality’s job listings. She hurriedly and eagerly updated her resume and applied that same day. It had taken an excruciating few weeks of no real response beyond the form letter acknowledging receipt of her application before she got a call from an assistant she knew in passing requesting a scheduled interview. She quickly scheduled the interview and waiting for what seemed way too long before the day arrived. She worried and fretted the entire time. She worried about her appearance and she worried about her experience. She fretted about her knowledge and she over thought questions to non-existent anticipated questions. She changed her interview outfit at least four times. At the end of the day, though, she needn’t have worried. She passed that interview and the subsequent follow-up meetings with ease. The charisma that made her online avocation so successful worked face-to-face as well. Charming and self-assured, she was offered the position, and the healthy raise that came with it, formally at the end of her last interview. The onboarding process that started her time on the team had been a tedious and overly complicated two week course in non-disclosure agreements, training manuals, mandatory online job training and hypothetical processes that seemed unlikely to ever happen. While understandably necessary, these activities were boring and seemed exceedingly gratuitous and lengthy. More importantly they added a healthy dose of confusion that did nothing to boost her confidence. She had begun to worry she wasn’t up to the task after the training. It wasn’t until she began to learn one-on-one from a senior co-worker that the previously daunting and overwhelming duties in Dani’s future had been given a renewed sense of clarity. After regaining her spirit, she began playing in disposable training environments. She, in no time was building test cases and scenarios all under the watchful eye of her soon-to-be peers.

Today, though, it was time to get down to business. She was on her own and she wanted to look good and feel good even if she was working from her home and only visible on video meetings. Stripping casually as she made her way back across the master bedroom and into the adjoining bathroom, she stopped to give final approval to the outfit she had picked out the night previous. She began humming that tune that had been stuck in her head since hearing it while lying in Elizabeth Forrester’s bed. It was easily recognizable as a melody, though something about it was off, thus leaving the name of it frustratingly just out of reach.

Entering the spacious shower, Dani turned the tap nearly fully toward the “hot” side. The water quickly reached a balmy appeasing temperature and Dani slipped in to let the warm steady stream flow over her. As the comfort of the water baptized her figure in soothing pacification, Dani ran her hands along her ample, voluptuous curves. She roamed that familiar path of her body replaying this morning’s encounter in her head. Starting with her full, substantial breasts that still stood relatively firm over her figure. Steam rose to envelope her fullness and she moved her hands further down to her soft round alabaster belly and moved further to her plentiful and much appreciated, even if silently, thighs, hips, and backside

Sudden thoughts of her mother’s words intruded the pleasant re-run of Elizabeth’s earlier adventure. ”You know, Dani you’ll never be a small girl, but you would be so beautiful, if you would… just have some discipline and lose the weight, “her mother used to say, “You’ve got such a pretty face that could have your pick of any boy in town to take care of you.”

The thought of any of the local hicks ‘taking care of her” repulsed her. Dani was not interested in some unsophisticated redneck taking care of her, especially given the candidates in her tiny rural town. She had bigger dreams than the boys of Fort Scott, Kansas. Fetching a beer and a sandwich while her ”man” talked the woes of  Jayhawk football on the porch to his equally as backwards friends held absolutely no appeal to her. She intended to make her own way. She wanted the pick of any man… in the world... on her terms. They were going to come to her, not the other way around.  She wasn’t potentially beautiful with some work and a diet; she was beautiful of her regard no matter what her mother said. More importantly she offered the strong intelligent mind that could had keep her strong in the face of the constant belittling. The words stung, sure, but she had heard them so many times as to be meaningless.

Shrugging to herself at her mother’s unkindness, Dani moved her cleaning down to her legs. The stocky full calves were still attractive and caught many an eye when the seam of a sexy set of nylons peeked from under a knee length dress. She ran across the slightest feeling of stubble. Time for a shave, she thought. Sitting on seat cushion that padded the molded shower ledge, Dani reached for the small-ish tin of Faena Tallow Shave Soap and the H.L. Thater shave brush sitting on the shower shelf. Dipping the badger bristled brush into the soap, she lathered up a goodly amount of cream and applied a fine layer of the cream, from ankle to knee, front to back to her right leg. Setting the tin and the brush back on the shelf she picked up a small teak box setting next to them on the shelf. Opening the box, she pulled the gleaming black and gold Kal Captain straight razor and folded it open. The sharpened blade shone under the fluorescent lights. The straight razor shave was a luxury and a ritual that Dani afforded herself as a concession to her own private vanity. It was something she learned in a previous relationship that ran white hot with elements of dom/sub play, but had burned out quickly. It was the one thing she kept from that time. Nevermore to return to the world of harsh chemical depilatories, plastic disposable blades or the electric monstrosities of shavers that didn’t seem to work anyway.

Humming the recurring tune that was perplexingly affixed to her subconscious, Dani took the keen edge to a practiced angle and slowly drew it up from the curve that was her ankle, across the breath of her shin to the dimpled knee, halfway up. She rinsed the excess cream from the razor and the front of her leg and inspected her work. Satisfied with the results, she repeated the process, on the sides and her firm round calves. With the same experienced rhythm, she disposed of any lingering leg hair there. After ensuring her right leg was entirely smooth, she moved to the left leg and restarted the very same process there with the same expert precision.

When the lower legs were completed, she applied a generous layer of foam to her inner thigh and ever so carefully ran ever so gently against the bikini line. Once again, feeling for any excess stubble she ran her fingers over the sensitive inner folds of her thigh and with a knowing smile, felt nothing extraneous.       

At once she felt a sting, Shit, she thought, I guess I did nick myself. Reaching back down, she found blood in, coincidentally, the same place as Elizabeth’s wound. This time, though, the blood flowed much more liberally. What are the chances of that? Hell I didn’t think I even got in that far with the blade, she wondered. She exited the shower to examine the cut. The blood streamed in a meandering rivulet down the inside of her thigh.

Covering the laceration with a dab of bacitracin and a small “dot” adhesive bandage, Dani continued her morning routine. After applying some scented oil to her freshly shaven legs and washed body, she styled her hair in a retro swept up style and applied some minimal accentuating makeup. Finally Dani slipped a delicate black lace demi cup bra around her ample bosom and a pair of black lace thigh high lace stockings that were attached to a satin garter belt she had picked up during a mall shopping splurge at Torrid the weekend previous. While pulling the entire under ensemble together with a pair of satin French cut bikini panties, she felt the Band-Aid already beginning to fail. She pulled it off to take a second look at the gash. It was larger and deeper than she initially had thought with blood pooling in the tender folds of skin. Upon inspecting further, the blood ran freely in a thin but widening stream down her thigh. She reapplied the antibiotic ointment and applied, this time, a somewhat larger dressing.

Picking out her work attire she went with a simple white collared blouse and grey sweater combination from Nordstrom Rack and slate gray skirt from Lane Bryant that betrayed the wicked temptation underneath. “Gotta stay business appropriate to the normies, “she said aloud, “They will never know what’s underneath.”

Slipping into a pair of shiny black leather heels, Dani headed to the kitchen for a French press of her favorite whole bean espresso roast coffee and one of the raspberry scones Mrs. Cannivale had made for her last evening. Noticing her supply of beans was low, she made a note to head down to the local coffee house for a fresh supply and to check with Mrs. Cannivale for anything she might need from the grocery that was on the way.

With a warm mug and pastry in hand, she went to her work desk in the converted office she had made of the second bedroom and logged in to the NetNeurality corporate servers with ten minutes to spare.

[its-love-u-asshole]

Corresponding [fic]

Summary: Kuroo can't help but fear his own weakness, and more than anything, he fears that Tsukishima won't understand the broken parts of himself which Kuroo tries so desperately to hide. However, maybe Kuroo needs to start giving the blond the benefit of the doubt.

Rating: T

Tags: Pacific Rim AU, lots of sappiness, very light angst, mentions of abusive parents but nothing major 

Note:  Hello! This is a sequel fic in my Pacific Rim series, so if you haven’t read the first installment I highly recommend you do so, or you won’t understand much of what’s happening lol. I’ve had the idea for this sequel for a while but I finally got to sit down and write it out, so I hope you enjoy! Thanks to @emeraldwaves for reading this over! 

AO3

The phrase ‘adorned in polycarbonate’ would probably strike most people as odd, and was by no means a traditional observation. However, it was all Kuroo had to describe his co-pilot in that moment.

Tsukishima's footsteps echoed against the floor's railing, the dim lighting of the jaeger cockpit casting a gentle glow on the other's already luminous figure. Kuroo briefly wondered if only he saw Tsukishima in this way, as a beacon, and found that he'd gladly spend his life convincing others of the phenomena if he had to.

Everyone should see how much the other shined, like he'd done for Kuroo in more than enough ways, illuminating the ever-present darkness.

For now though, it was just the two of them, taking each other in. The noises of heavy machinery and diagnostic checks faded into nothingness, and all Kuroo could comprehend were honey brown eyes and that suit.

Kuroo was shameless about it as Tsukishima stepped forward, completely free from the shadows, eyes roaming over the sleek charcoal clothing which only intensified the blond's brightness.

A jaeger pilot's drivesuit was as jarring as it was necessary. The glorified wetsuit was covered in "armor," or hard plates made of polycarbonate fibers which protected the chest, legs, and spinal cord.

Kuroo had a matching one, black and sturdy, but he was less impressed with himself in the mirror than he was with how Tsukishima looked right then.

The armor hugged the blond's lean but muscled frame, accentuating every curve and ridge. The bulky attire wasn't meant to look so beautiful, but Tsukishima made it work. More than anything though, it showed how downright powerful Tsukishima was. The new look commanded the same authority which the blond had exhibited in the cafeteria on Kuroo's first day, only this time it was ready for more than just fighting words.

Tsukishima looked ready for battle, ready to pilot. A chill raced down Kuroo's spine, like he couldn't possibly keep all his satisfaction in if he tried.

He'd never felt more honored to stand by someone in his life.

"Done staring?" Tsukishima's teasing lilt made Kuroo smirk, his eyes flashing with fondness which had only taken a few days to fully cultivate. How much more could he be pulled into Tsukishima's orbit? How much more could he pull Tsukishima into his own?

He didn't want to wait to find out.

"Not yet, give me a good...twenty...years?" Kuroo said, and Tsukishima promptly tossed a helmet at his face. It didn't stop Kuroo from catching the flush on the other's cheeks, the color amplified by the midnight garb. Tsukishima rolled his eyes, but smiled, and Kuroo's heart stalled, as expected.

It was becoming quite common.

Tsukishima turned away, eyeing his reflection in his own helmet's visor with unmasked vulnerability. "I bet you would say that to all your co-pilots."

Tsukishima huffed a small laugh, waiting for Kuroo's playful reply or stupid pick up line.

But Kuroo didn't want to do that. Maybe it was the overwhelming nostalgia which came from standing in the Nekoma's control pod, about to drift again for the first time in years. Or maybe it was all those happy tears he'd shed the night before, or the ones which threatened to leak out even then.

Overall, Tsukishima stood in front of him, open and proud to be there, and ready to follow Kuroo down his dream's old path. Kuroo didn't feel like lying to him about anything in that moment, nor would he brush the truth away.

When they were in a jaeger, there was no need for pretend.

"No, I really don't. It's just you." And Kuroo hoped it was just him for Tsukishima too.

His copilot turned to him, surprised at Kuroo's serious tone, and for a second, only the beeps of the jaeger's machines passed between them. Anxiety and excitement reflected back from Tsukishima's eyes, and once more Kuroo didn't question why they were so compatible. At the root of things, they were the same.

They stared for a while, and Kuroo clutched his helmet, breathing in time with the Nekoma's vitals. To him, the jaeger had always been alive, an extension of himself, and now an extension of Tsukishima too.

With Tsukishima at a loss for words, Kuroo shrugged, grinning lazily. "But yeah, you look really good."

Tsukishima blinked, startled, and then his brain caught up to him, and he laughed, light and real this time. Kuroo drank up the sound, using it as a natural stress reliever as the time of their test neared closer and closer.

Yeah, they'd be fine.

"Hey Kuroo," Tsukishima said, fixing his helmet to his head.

Kuroo perked up, like a cat, his head tilted slightly as he snapped on his own helmet. "Hm?"

Tsukishima turned away, avoiding Kuroo's gaze as his voice dropped to barely above a whisper. "You look good too."

Somehow, the innocent compliment had Kuroo's brain ready to explode, and he didn't try to hide the color blooming on his cheeks.

They exchanged one last smile before their coms filled with static, and Ukai's voice filled their ears. "Pilots, prepare for neural handshake. Two minutes."

All of a sudden, the mix of nerves was back, but instead of making Kuroo sick to his stomach, it sent him flying into action. He and Tsukishima shared one last grin before stepping into position, linking up their limbs with the correct attachments on the jaeger.

Man, it's been a while....

Kuroo hadn't drifted in so long, he probably would be in for a shock. Having his memories, painful ones and all, flowing through his mind at the speed of light into his partner's, and seeing Tsukishima's in return. He remembered how overwhelming it could be, but part of him was excited to finally get to share all of himself with the blond.

He pushed away the insecurity as much as he could, not wanting to think of all the struggle and strife which Tsukishima would no doubt witness. Kuroo had gone through a lot of low points in his life. He'd been stepped on, cast out, forced to wander and work meager jobs not at all fitting of his skills. Pathetic, pitiful.

Kuroo knew there was a crowd gathered around the jaeger too, on the outside. He couldn't see them but he felt the stares, the judgement, the complete lack of faith and trust in him. Maybe he deserved some of it. He could picture Daishou's smug face and the crew's bated breaths.

They were waiting for his show to flop, and Kuroo wanted nothing more than to prove them wrong. Regardless, the fear sat in his gut, deep rooted.

But one look at Tsukishima, with his calm face and unexpected tenacity, Kuroo could put some faith in him.

Please don't be disappointed in me...

That was his last thought.

"20 seconds. Get ready to drift boys." Ukai at least sounded supportive.

"Ready to be inside my head?" Kuroo said, laughing off the tremors of apprehension inside him as he heard the machinery around him power up.

"I thought I already was," Tsukishima said with a shrug, and yeah, Kuroo could not argue with that. Then, the blond's smile fell, and his eyes filled with the same genuine concern which Kuroo couldn't get enough of. "Stay with me."

Don't get lost in a memory.

Kuroo exhaled shakily, nodding once. "You too."

He didn't mind that it sounded like begging, he only hoped it wasn't drowned out by the whirring of the Nekoma around him, his nerves sparking like fire.

"Neural handshake initiated."

.

.

.

The thing about drifting was it was such an intimate experience that eventually, it became hard to tell his own memories apart from his partner's. The visions, the feelings...they blended together and collided, split in half then reformed all in the same split second. Memories were powerful things too, showing someone's weakest and most sacred moments.

Witnessing the milestones and mistakes of someone's life...the first time it was too much. Too personal.

Now of course, Kuroo didn't mind the sensation as much. The cold chill and the mind numbing tremble of watching everything pass by in mere seconds. Well, it was technically a few seconds. For pilots it felt like hours, years even, trapped in some nostalgia driven world which was separate from the rest of humanity.

Just the two of them.

Kuroo opened his eyes at the sound of static coming from an old television set, and immediately saw the grainy image of a news report playing on it. The surrounding living room was littered with toys and discarded items. Picture frames, candles, console remotes...

Everything was in disarray, as if a tornado had swept through. Immediately, Kuroo's first thought was the aftermath of a kaiju attack, but things weren't destroyed quite enough for that conclusion to make sense. The roof was intact, the power was on, and no sound came from outside. Right then, the only sound came from the news report, detailing an ongoing kaiju attack in one of America's coastal cities.

It was obviously one of the bad ones too, before the jaeger program had really come into effect. The information bar at the bottom told of numerous fatalities and futile military efforts.

Strangely enough, as intense as the broadcast was, no one sat in front of the television watching it.

Kuroo squinted, eyes roaming the space around him over and over, trying to remember. The frayed edges of the home's walls told him he was in a memory, but nothing seemed familiar to him. Anxiety bubbled up inside him before diffusing completely, some sick form of relief.

He thought he'd be the one to become caught up in an old memory, an old tragedy.

But this memory wasn't his.

He wasn't the one who was stuck.

At the realization, Kuroo's relief shattered, replaced with concern. Before he could even think to call out for Tsukishima, a crash startled him. Suddenly, two small boys came darting out of the kitchen, just as plate hit the adjacent wall, breaking into shards.

From the kitchen, he could hear more things begin to break. The toppling of chairs, the kicking of cabinets...

But Kuroo's focus wasn't on the commotion, only the two boys in front of him who were desperately trying to crawl under the coffee table. Panic from the news report kept playing, but it was far less important then.

Tsukishima looked so small, probably only about five or six, tripping over his hand-me-down pajama pants while he scrambled after his brother. He clutched the fabric of his hoodie as he brought his knees up to his chest, eyes darting towards the kitchen in fear when he heard something else break. He flinched, like somehow, they'd be next.

Tsukishima Akiteru was older than his brother, and his face was one Kuroo knew well. Who didn't? His face had decorated magazines and talk shows ever since he'd made it big as a jaeger pilot. But as Kuroo watched him, Akiteru didn't look anything like the bronze statue they had built of him in Tokyo's museum. The heroic bravery was absent, replaced with trembling hazel eyes and the barely held in tears of a twelve year old trying to shield his brother.

Kuroo's chest tightened just looking at them, and he still couldn't bring himself to call out, but he had to. He had to get Tsukishima out of this.

Akiteru held his brother tight as the voices from the kitchen rose to screaming. Carefully, Kuroo walked the small distance of the living room until he could kneel down next to his co-pilot's younger self, wishing he could cradle him in his arms.

"Stop!" A woman's voice shrieked from the kitchen as Kuroo watched the young Tsukishima tremble beneath the coffee table.

A rugged, drunk voice came from a man a few seconds later. "I told you to shut the hell up!"

Kuroo glared at the shadows of Tsukishima's parents, and wondered how none of the neighbors had called the cops or interfered yet. The screaming match was brutal, bouncing off the small home's walls.

Kuroo heard Tsukishima sniff, his eyes shut tight and his hands clasped over his ears to block out the noise. So small, so helpless.

And again, Kuroo couldn't help but notice the violent kaiju attack coverage playing on the T.V. screen, completely unnoticed. But yeah, made sense. He guessed that not even a kaiju could be this scary, not in a million years.

"Tsukki, Kei, you gotta snap out of it," Kuroo said, strong and firm. The noise from the kitchen threatened to drown him out, but he reached forward, making sure Tsukishima's focus would be solely on him.

At the sound of another crash, Akiteru was gone, and Tsukishima was no longer a child. And as fucked up as the situation was, Kuroo had to remind himself to breathe, seeing his co-pilot next to him again in all his beauty.

But no, this wasn't the Tsukishima he'd grown to know.

The blond was shaking, afraid, despite his pilot uniform. His body shivered under Kuroo's touch, and his eyes opened to reveal the same fright his childhood self had expressed. The blond's sassiness, his control...it was gone.

Despite Kuroo's desire to shelter Tsukishima in any way, he felt himself smiling at such childishness, at how much he and Tsukishima were alike after all.

To think all this time, he'd been so worried about his own shortcomings...

Tsukishima was meant to be his partner, he was meant to understand. Kuroo should've had more faith from the start.

"Hey, I'm here now," Kuroo said, jostling Tsukishima a bit with his hand. "This isn't real. This...it's not happening anymore. I need you to come back to me alright?"

Tsukishima whimpered, but he tore his gaze away from the kitchen, landing on Kuroo's comforting gaze. The shouts continued in the background. "K-Kuroo?"

"Yeah! Yeah, it's me," Kuroo said, heart expanding. Tsukishima's eyes softened, but he flinched again at the sound of a chair behind overturned. The shadows in the kitchen grew, as if getting closer...

Tsukishima's breathless tone had Kuroo's eyes snapping back to him. "I...I'm scared, why am I scared?"

Immediately, Kuroo thought of his own terror. The risk of fucking up, of ruining both of their careers, of endangering lives...he'd always beaten himself up so much for all of it. Now though...now he understood a little better.

"Well," he said, sighing to himself. "Because you have the right to be."

Whether it be kaijus or abusive fathers, neither were without dread. A lot of things were scary, and maybe he didn't have to give people shit for it, especially not himself.

But Kei, I'm here now. We're both here. We can fight and be afraid together.

"I feel like I'm always scared," Tsukishima admitted, his voice no louder than a whisper. The words were much to Kuroo's surprise, given Tsukishima's usual demeanor. The blond was glaring at his own feet, like the confession itself pained him. It probably did, someone as prideful as he was...

"Me too," Kuroo said, and Tsukishima's brow furrowed, like he was surprised or something. Even though Tsukishima knew better than anyone else how terrified Kuroo could get. It made Kuroo adore him twice as much.

Looking at Tsukishima like this now, with tears in the blond's eyes, a lot of other things became clearer to him.

"I'm sorry," Kuroo said then, compelled to do so, and bowed his head. It was necessary in his mind. He had to come clean here and now.

They had a test to run.

Tsukishima blinked, wiping away the few tears he'd accidentally shed. The shouting in the background began to fade into nothingness. "Wh--how come?"

Kuroo smiled softly, and he threaded their fingers together, his heart finally at ease. "I guess I sort of put you on a pedestal. Not that you don't deserve one but...I kinda felt like I wasn't good enough for you. That you'd eventually realize that I wasn't a great partner or...I don't know. That you'd realize how weak I can be."

Kuroo swallowed the lump forming in his throat, and Tsukishima's eyes stayed trained on him. The least Kuroo could do was look back. "But, I know now that you're...you need my help too. That we're both a little weak. Seeing you here like this, it made me want to protect you."

Like you protect me.

"You don't have to be strong for me 24/7, because I definitely won't be strong all the time. But when it counts, I know you'll fight with me, so..."

Kuroo's voice shook, and he closed his eyes, feeling Tsukishima's other hand come up to clasp his own. There was no noise now, not even the television. Tsukishima's mind was calm.

The blond shifted next to him, untucking his knees, and Kuroo dared to look up again. He watched as Tsukishima rose up, pulling Kuroo to his feet. His breath came out shakily, like he hadn't completely forgotten the echoes of broken plates, but he just clutched Kuroo's hands tighter in the face of the fear.

That's all Kuroo could ask for.

"And...I know you'll fight with me, so..."

Kuroo laughed, grinning as the rest of their memories began to flow together again, unfrozen now. He saw and felt the rest of Tsukishima's mistakes, the moments of frailty, and embraced them all as he shared his own.

As his mind began to scramble, he looked at Tsukishima one last time, finding no judgement.

The blond stared at him, and the tear stains had dissipated, his eyes catching fire. "So...let's go be afraid then. And kill some kaiju of course."

Kuroo returned the grin tenfold, and knew he couldn't have said it any better.

.

.

.

"Right hemisphere calibrated. Left hemisphere calibrated. Ready to active the Jaeger."

Kuroo's entire body jolted, and he was back in the Nekoma, Tsukishima at his side. The Jaeger breathed to life, moving as Kuroo raised his arms. He smirked, looking to find that Tsukishima was doing exactly the same.

For the first time in a long time, Kuroo was energized, and he remembered what pushed him into a Jaeger in the first place. I was born for this.

The world seemed brighter almost, though the cockpit was dim, only the machinery and digital screens provided any light. Still, Kuroo felt exhilarated, raising his hands along with Tsukishima. Their movements corresponded exactly, totally in sync.

It was like a dream.

Ukai's voice spoke into their coms, cementing their lives in reality, and Kuroo could hear the pride in the commander's voice. "Nice job on a successful test, boys. You're ready to go."

Ready to fight.

Kuroo couldn't help but laughed, and man, he hoped everyone outside felt damn stupid for doubting them now.

Kuroo held in his emotions, overjoyed to let the Nekoma come alive once again, and vowed he wouldn't let it down again. No matter what mistakes he made, he'd return to it, time and time again.

And whenever the next kaiju attack hit, he and Tsukishima would be there, totally united.

They were met with applause when they exited the cockpit, both from the staff and the band of observers. It was strange and out of place, as if they'd killed an actual kaiju instead of simply drifting for the first time, but Kuroo would take it.

He hadn't felt so proud in a long time.

He pulled Tsukishima into a tight hug, and to his shock, the other reciprocated in full. Kuroo could definitely get used to this.

"Thanks...for staying with me," Tsukishima whispered, and Kuroo hugged him tighter, knowing none of his words would do the feeling inside him justice.

I think it's me who should be thanking you.

But there would be plenty of time for that.

They separated, and Kuroo looked up to the onlookers on the railing, eyes finding Daishou easily. It was weird, the split second of tension Kuroo felt, not knowing whether he'd receive some congratulations or a sneer. In all honesty, he was prepared for either. Nothing could ruin his resolve now.

But Daishou had ways of surprising him. The other nodded respectfully, genuinely, a sharp smirk on his face.

The kind of look which said "I'll see you out there."

Somehow, Kuroo wouldn't have had it any other way.

"Nice job you two!"

Both he and Tsukishima turned to the voice, finding Semi Eita standing there with his less than enthused looking partner. Kuroo had never met him or Shirabu Kenjirou before, but something told him Shirabu always looked like that.

"Thank you," Kuroo and Tsukishima said in unison, bowing slightly.

"It'll be good to have strong pilots at our side again," Semi continued, his grin fierce, and his eyes filled with fury. Huh, Kuroo thought he looked a bit tame before, but that was far from the truth.

Semi was as insane as the rest of them, but Kuroo would be honored to battle alongside him.

Kuroo watched them walk off, noticing as their fingers brushed together ever so slightly. A real bond, no doubt about it, strengthened by many fights.

Kuroo hoped he and Tsukishima would be as successful. That's the other thing he feared, losing Tsukishima. But as he watched the blond bask in the glow of their small victory, he knew he shouldn't worry.

Tsukishima would claw and bite before he went down, and Kuroo would too.

They'd go down protecting the people of the world, and each other.

After all, that's what made them perfect partners.

As if sensing Kuroo's train of thought, Tsukishima turned to him, grinning in that subtle, secretive way which Kuroo was beginning to fall in love with.

The 'we're going to kick ass' smile suited the blond well. And of course, he was one hundred percent correct.

Kuroo looked up at the dormant kaiju sirens bolted to the walls, knowing soon they'd be ringing loud and menacing, signaling their first fight.

Tsukishima grabbed his hand, and Kuroo knew he had followed his gaze. With a smirk, Kuroo intertwined their fingers together.

Bring it on.

[kyndaris]

Alpha and Omega

Though Darksiders Genesis was released in early December 2019 on PC storefronts, I was more of a mind to play the title on consoles. As such, it was not until Valentine’s Day 2020 that I purchased the game at my local JB Hi-Fi and installed it on my PlayStation 4. It would be a few weeks afterwards that I would be able to play it due to my obligation to travel to Taiwan with my mother and also due to the fact that I was wrapping up Yakuza 3. Since then, of course, the COVID-19 outbreak has spread across the entire world. My hopes in a previous post have been dashed and at time of writing, I fear that it will be a painful few months. Who even knows if I’ll even be able to venture out to purchase the Final Fantasy 7 Remake in a brick and mortar store. Or even the Last of Us Part 2.

Apologies for digressing but seeing South Korea, Iran and Italy swiftly go into quarantine lock-down procedures, as well as seeing the numbers in my own country rising, the whole COVID-19 situation has weighed a lot on my mind. 

Back to Darksiders Genesis!

Having played through all previous three titles in the series, I was eager to see and play as Strife - the last of the Horsemen. Though this was not a sequel, I was eager to see where this spin-off/ prequel would go in terms of lore and laying out of backstory for the characters. Despite the difference of opinions in many of the early reviews, I was still eager to try my hand at it.

Just like the other games, the artwork reminded me strongly of a comic-book style, particularly in the cutscenes. Though these were predominantly still images, I still enjoyed the bold lines and powerful colours that were employed. This could be seen in the level design and the different locales. The palette swaps helped nail the atmosphere and give the overall clustered levels a theme.

 As with the other games, the Horsemen are tasked with a seemingly impossible task by the Council to ensure the balance. In Darksiders Genesis, this meant War and Strife were assigned to uncovering Lucifer’s plot and stopping him. The story itself was also serviceable and also helped fill-in gaps from the previous titles. Though Strife was a new character, I also liked getting to know War a little more beyond the stoicism he displayed in the first Darksiders. It also helped shape my understanding of who Strife was and his potential role in the next mainline title. 

Alas for our two heroes, they figure out Lucifer’s plan much too late and humanity is infected with hatred and lust and all the bad emotions, a la Pandora’s Box. This then sets in place the creation of the seven seals that would be broken in the first game and the start of the apocalypse. 

The combat also differs quite a bit from the Darksiders titles. Instead of a third-person action game where the camera sits over the shoulder of the character, it uses an isometric view. Additionally, the developers also hoped to make it an enjoyable co-op adventure reminiscent of Diablo or Twin-Stick Shooters (if controlling Strife. I preferred War for the damage he dealt out, as I felt the enemies did not die quick enough before Strife was overwhelmed by numbers until a certain upgrade was obtained). As I have no siblings and none of my friends had picked up the title, I played it solo. Despite that, I very much enjoyed my time and did not find my efforts hampered in the least due to my playstyle. In fact, I quite enjoyed jumping from character to character in order to solve problems as well as in combat.

Darksiders Genesis does not contain a traditional levelling up system, though there is a gauge on each mission for players to know how strong their characters need to be. This is usually calculated by the items discovered - such as health and wrath cores, pieces of armour as well as enemy cores that are slotted into an upgrade system. In order to obtain these enemy cores, the player can kill them or purchase them from Vulgrim. With my terrible RNG luck, it took a while for me to build up a stash or even level them up. Once maxed out, any additional cores provide souls - the currency of the Darksiders games. This allowed me to mix and match abilities and statistics to my advantage, though I often had to remind myself to slot them in place.

I also liked how the game allowed me to explore the map, with collectibles cleverly hidden away behind puzzles. It was also clear, however, that many of the levels were made with replayability in mind as not all collectibles could be obtained in a single playthrough in the early stages.

Overall, Darksiders Genesis proved an interesting diversion from the woes of our current plight. I’m intrigued by what the Darksiders series will take us next. There are so many different ways the overall narrative could play out and I can’t wait to properly jump into the boots of Strife as he tackles whatever impossible task that is set before him. It would also be nice to play as all four and witness as they wreak havoc to demon and angel alike. 

[aion-rsa]

Xbox Game Pass: New Games for September 2020 Revealed

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

Xbox Game Pass is Microsoft’s subscription service for Xbox One owners. It’s designed to be like a “Netflix for games,” where you pay a simple monthly rate and get access to loads of games for download. It’s not to be confused with the Xbox Live Gold membership, which gives users a selection of free games each month.

There was a huge surge in popularity and profile for Xbox Game Pass in 2018, mainly due to Microsoft unveiling a strategy that puts brand new games on the service. Sea of Thieves was the first example of this, followed by State of Decay 2. Crackdown 3 launched on Feb. 15. Since then, the service has seen the Day 1 launch of several Xbox exclusives, including Gears 5, The Outer Worlds, and Halo: Reach on the Halo: The Master Chief Collection.

Membership to Xbox Game Pass will set you back $9.99 per month. You can now also get an Xbox Game Pass Ultimate subscription for $1 for the first month and $14.99 a month after that. The subscription includes an Xbox Live Gold membership as well as all of the games offered on Xbox Game Pass and Xbox Game Pass for PC.

New games are added each month to Xbox Game Pass. Here are the games coming this month (with descriptions courtesy of the Xbox team):

Xbox Game Pass: Games for September 2020

Crusader Kings III (PC) – September 1

“This grand strategy game puts you at the head of a noble house in a deeply researched medieval world. Use your armies, your diplomacy, and your wit to expand and elevate your dynasty. Each generation brings new characters and new challenges as pesky plotters, turbulent priests and ungrateful children challenge your efforts to keep your realm and your family in line. Pre-install now, so you’re ready when Sept comes.”

Resident Evil 7 Biohazard (Console & PC) – September 3

“Menace and desperation seethe through the rotting walls of an abandoned southern farmhouse. Resident Evil 7 biohazard marks a new beginning for survival horror with a shift to an immersive first-person perspective. Powered by the RE Engine, graphics reach new heights of incredible photorealism to further draw players into the disturbing game world.”

Xbox Game Pass: Games for August 2020

Darksiders: Genesis (Console) – August 6

“An action/adventure game that tears its way through hordes of demons, angels, and everything in-between on its way to Hell and back with guns blazing and swords swinging. Genesis gives players their first look at the world of Darksiders before the events of the original game. Furthermore, it introduces the fourth and last horseman Strife, as well as co-op gameplay for the first time in the franchise.”

It Lurks Below (Console & PC) – August 6

“The world is being slowly corrupted, and you have awoken from a terrible dream. Create a customized character and choose from several different classes to delve deep into the mysteries of what evil lurks below. Dig down and explore the randomly generated levels, find random items, and combat deadly monsters to get the answers in this retro-styled, 2D, action-oriented, survival RPG by David Brevik.”

The Dark Pictures Anthology: Man of Medan (Console) – August 6

“Five friends set sail on a holiday diving trip and as the day unfolds, a storm rolls in and their trip soon changes into something much more sinister. Who will live? Who will die? It’s up to you and the choices you make. You can also share your terrifying story with a friend online or go for safety in numbers with the up-to-five-players offline “movie night” mode.”

Trailmakers (Console & PC) – August 6

“Build an amazing vehicle out of blocks and explore an alien planet in Trailmakers. This physics-based action game lets you build anything from hypercars and helicopters to hovercrafts and hydrofoils. Play solo or with friends in huge sandbox maps or perfect your race car to perfection in the Trailmakers Rally.”

UnderMine (Console & PC) – August 6

“Delve deep into the UnderMine and discover its secrets, one peasant at a time! UnderMine is an action-adventure roguelike that blends combat and dungeon crawling with RPG-like progression. Mine gold, die, upgrade yourself, and try again! Challenge dangerous bosses and rescue helpful characters that supply new upgrades for your adventure. Decipher the cryptic messages of the UnderMine’s residents and unfold the mystery at the heart of the dungeon.”

Xeno Crisis (Console & PC) – August 6

“Run and gun your way through seven distinct areas and master an arsenal of ten different weapons as you take on thousands of varied adversaries in this top-down arena shooter for one or two players. It will require guile, composure, and good judgment to have a chance of reaching the final showdown. Xeno Crisis is a genuine 16-bit throwback for those who enjoy a challenge, with superb pixel art and a blistering soundtrack.”

Final Fantasy VII HD (Console & PC) – August 13

“Relive the RPG that redefined gaming. The world has fallen under the dominion of the Shinra Electric Power Company, a sinister corporation that has monopolized the planet’s very life force as Mako energy. Cloud Strife, a former member of Shinra’s elite Soldier unit, now turned mercenary, lends his aid to the rebels, unaware that he will be drawn into an epic battle for the fate of the planet, while having to come to terms with his own lost past.”

Microsoft Flight Simulator (PC) – August 18

“From Xbox Game Studios, available with Xbox Game Pass (PC or Ultimate) on day one! From light planes to wide-body jets, fly highly detailed and accurate aircraft in the next generation of Microsoft Flight Simulator. Test your piloting skills against the challenges of real-time atmospheric simulation and live weather in a dynamic and living world. The world is at your fingertips.”

Spiritfarer (Console & PC) – August 18

“Learn how to say goodbye in this cozy management game about dying. Playing as Stella the spiritfarer, build a boat to explore an imaginative world in search of spirits seeking passage to the afterlife. Befriend and care for your passengers as you farm, mine, fish, harvest, cook, and craft your way across mystical seas on your hand-crafted ferry. Run, jump, zip, and glide your way through elegantly constructed platforming levels. Bring along a friend to join the fun as Daffodil the Cat, in optional two player local co-op. Spend relaxing quality time with your spirit passengers, create lasting memories, and, ultimately, learn how to say goodbye to your cherished spirit friends.”

Battletoads (Console & PC) – August 20

“From Xbox Game Studios, available with Xbox Game Pass on day one! The wait is over! Rash, Zitz, and Pimple are returning at last to smash-hit their way through an all-new action-packed adventure of choreographed chaos, and couch co-op may never be the same again. 1-3 players will take control of the Battletoads and team up to storm through wild and unpredictable stages with only one rule – expect the unexpected. Teamwork makes the dream work in a drop-in, drop-out gameplay blast, filled with over-the-top gameplay moments that anyone can enjoy, but only a True ‘Toad’ can master. Pre-install now, so you’re ready to play when it drops!”

Crossing Souls (PC) – August 20

“It’s 1986 in California, and a group of friends will live the summer of their lives after a mysterious discovery in the woods outside their quiet town. By uncovering an artifact whose powers they don’t fully understand, these remarkable kids will defy the laws of nature and somehow interact between two planes of reality: life and death. Their curiosity will trigger a series of unexpected events that will get them involved in a government conspiracy and a mysterious U.S. Army general with his own nefarious plans.”

Darksiders: Genesis (PC) – August 20

“Darksiders: Genesis is an action/adventure game that tears its way through hordes of demons, angels, and everything in-between on its way to Hell and back with guns blazing and swords swinging. Genesis gives players their first look at the world of Darksiders before the events of the original game. Furthermore, it introduces the fourth and last horseman Strife, as well as Co-op gameplay for the first time in the history of the franchise.”

Don’t Starve: Giant Edition (Console & PC) – August 20

“Don’t Starve: Giant Edition is an uncompromising wilderness survival game full of science and magic. You play as Wilson, an intrepid Gentleman Scientist who has been trapped by a demon and transported to a mysterious wilderness world. Wilson must learn to exploit his environment and its inhabitants if he ever hopes to escape and find his way back home. Don’t Starve: Giant Edition includes the original hit game Don’t Starve and the Reign of Giants expansion which adds new playable characters, seasonal bosses, weather conditions, new biomes, creatures, and more!”

New Super Lucky’s Tale (Console & PC) – August 21

“Join Lucky on his thrilling journey through the Book of Ages, a magical artifact that opens doors to amazing worlds. Meet new friends, explore exciting lands, and recover the missing pages from the evil sorcerer Jinx and his villainous family, the dreaded Kitty Litter. A complete re-imagining of the original Super Lucky’s Tale, with new content, an improved story, and major overhauls to the camera and player controls, New Super Lucky’s Tale is the definitive Lucky experience and a love letter to classic 3D platformers!”

Hypnospace Outlaw (Console & PC) – August 27

“Hypnospace Outlaw is a ’90s internet simulator in which you scour Hypnospace’s wide variety of weird and wonderful websites to hunt down wrongdoers, while also keeping an eye on your inbox, avoiding viruses and adware, and downloading a plethora of apps that may or may not be useful. In your spare time, you can customize your HypnOS desktop however you see fit, with a variety of downloads, wallpapers, screen savers, and helper bots to keep you company.”

Tell Me Why: Chapter 1 (Console & PC) – August 27

“From Xbox Game Studios, available with Xbox Game Pass on day one! Tell Me Why is the latest narrative adventure game from DONTNOD Entertainment, the studio behind the beloved franchise, Life is Strange. In this intimate mystery, twins Tyler and Alyson Ronan use their supernatural bond to unravel the memories of their loving but troubled childhood in beautiful small-town Alaska. Pre-install now, so you’re ready to play the moment Chapter 1 is available!”

Double Kick Heroes (Console & PC) ID@Xbox – August 28

“Double Kick Heroes mixes a shoot’em up with a rhythm game! In story mode, you must survive on the highway to hell by killing monsters with your gundillac! Struggle through the 30 levels of total madness and escape from this nightmare! Only the power of Metal can save your band! In arcade mode, jump right into the action and play your favorite tracks from the game. Features – Double Kick zombies in the face with insane Metal music!”

Wasteland 3 (Console & PC) – August 28

“From Xbox Game Studios, available with Xbox Game Pass on day one! Wasteland 3 is a squad-based RPG from inXile entertainment, featuring challenging tactical turn-based combat and a deep, reactive story full of twists, turns, and brutal ethical decisions that will keep you hooked whether you’re a Wasteland veteran or new to the series. Create a squad of up to six Rangers and customize them with perks and abilities geared to your playstyle. Pre-install now, so it’s ready to play when you are!”

The post Xbox Game Pass: New Games for September 2020 Revealed appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3e8utqM

[entergamingxp]

Five of the Best: E3 conferences • Eurogamer.net

Five of the Best is a weekly series about the small details we rush past when we’re playing but which shape a game in our memory for years to come. Details like the way a character jumps or the title screen you load into, or the potions you use and maps you refer back to. We’ve talked about so many in our Five of the Best series so far. But there are always more.

Five of the Best works like this. Various Eurogamer writers will share their memories in the article and then you – probably outraged we didn’t include the thing you’re thinking of – can share the thing you’re thinking of in the comments below. Your collective memory has never failed to amaze us – don’t let that stop now!

This week we’d usually have been arguing about – I’m sorry I mean debating – all the big announcements from E3. True, we had Sony’s PlayStation 5 reveal yesterday and it was very exciting, and true, we have a bonanza of PC game events to look forward to this weekend, but it’s not quite the same is it? Covid-19 means the world’s gaming industry couldn’t squash into downtown LA to see Microsoft and Sony reveal their fancy new machines, and the big publishers show their games for them.

Then again, we do get to look forward to another event – Microsoft’s – later this summer, and who knows? Maybe spreading it out will become a better way of doing things. But I will always miss the hubbub, the excitement and the intense drama of live E3. So in honour of an event which may never return in quite the same way, let’s relive some drama from the past! Hooray! Here are some of the best moments from E3 press conferences gone by. Have a lovely weekend.

The emotional The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess reveal

It was 2004. Nintendo fans the world over were just putting down their pitchforks over the cel-shaded redesign of Zelda: Wind Waker, just finishing an enjoyable E3 presentation, when the booming voice of Reggie announced a now much-copied “one more thing…”

As the first shots of Hyrule from Zelda: Twilight Princess appeared on-screen, the crowd fell silent as they drank in the view. And then Link appeared, riding on horseback, sword raised to the sky, and screams filled the room.

I remember watching this reveal as a teenager, bedroom walls plastered with Lord of the Rings posters, getting goosebumps at the thought of a true Ocarina of Time sequel. The sight of Miyamoto on stage, wielding a sword himself. Link has grown up, he acknowledged, and in this new game will look different, act different.

It’s odd to look back on now – Wind Waker has aged into the fan-favourite, while Twilight Princess turned into a moody take the series simply grew up from – but this was Nintendo giving fans exactly what they wanted at the time.

-Tom

To see this content please enable targeting cookies. Manage cookie settings

Microsoft getting over excited about Xbox Kinect

Oh, which Kinect E3 moment to pick? Is it the unveiling of Project Natal, pumped full of hot air and celebrity endorsements from the likes of Steven Spielberg? Maybe it’s those faked gameplay videos, or the mad, wooly promise of Project Milo? Or how about when Microsoft donned the entire industry in glow-in-the-dark ponchos and made us endure an outrageously pompous reveal? No, for me Kinect is best summed up in eight short seconds as Kudo Tsunoda tried to show us what the bottom of an Xbox Avatar’s shoe looked like – the resulting contortions gave us a searingly accurate take on one of Xbox’s biggest failures to date.

-Martin

To see this content please enable targeting cookies. Manage cookie settings

The one where legends came true

I don’t know if it had anything to do with it being the middle of the night here and delirium setting in but I’ve never seen a reaction like I did to Sony’s E3 2015 conference.

It started with a bang. Suddenly, The Last Guardian was before us, a game that had been missing in action for years, but here it was looking like a full and proper thing, and there was a release date, a year away. And to top it off, Fumito Ueda was in the audience, making any suspicions of squabbles with Sony seem to disappear.

Then, and people might forget this, we got our first look at Horizon: Zero Dawn, followed by a string of notable other big games, No Man’s Sky included. The conference was going really well. But it was about to go up a notch.

To see this content please enable targeting cookies. Manage cookie settings

Cue a CGI trailer for a brand new game we began to slowly recognise. A dove flying through a familiar-looking cityscape. Tetsuya Nomura’s name. A steamy sewer. A man with a minigun for an arm. Oh my god. A slim man behind him with a huge sword slung over his back. Oh my god. And as the camera panned up the sword became unmistakable. It was Cloud Strife’s. It was Final Fantasy 7. Fade to black. But was this game?

Then the words appeared: Remake. The room and internet erupted.

But Sony wasn’t finished yet. It’s funny looking back through Martin’s live text report now. “At this rate we’ll be getting Shenmue 3,” he joked after the Final Fantasy 7 reveal. Guess what? We did.

-Bertie

Backwards compatibility is finally a standard

Look I know it’s not the glitziest moment we’ve ever had, I know it’s not Keanu Reeves telling people they’re awesome, but it’s a moment with a deeper underlying importance for consoles overall.

It’s a moment from last year, from Microsoft, from when Phil Spencer was on stage talking about Project Scarlett, the machine machine we now know as Xbox Series X.

“Last year,” he said, “the team decided to tackle a feature that’s been consistently at the top of your request lists, and while we weren’t sure it was possible, today I’m pleased to announce Xbox One backwards compatibility.”

To see this content please enable targeting cookies. Manage cookie settings

It took a moment to settle in. We can play Xbox One games on Xbox Series X just like that. Pop in the disc and away we go, no additional faff required to play the games you already own. Forwards-compatibility, I heard someone call it. It’s how things should be but not have they have been in recent years (although as people in the comments below pointed out and I overlooked, the Wii U would play Wii games, and earlier consoles offered backwards compatibility too).

I wonder if that moment influenced Sony having PlayStation 5 follow suit with backwards compatibility or if it was already part of the plan. Regardless, thank you.

At last.

-Bertie

Ubisoft being Ubisoft

As well as making the most exhaustive open-world games around, Ubisoft’s real job is saving E3 from corporate blandness every single year. There have been misfires but with dancing bears and the brilliant presence of Aisha Tyler, this is the publisher that tends to get E3 right – a celebration of games in all their forms.

Favourite moments are too many to mention. I am particularly fond of a lengthy break in proceedings one year to reintroduce laser tag to the world. But then there was that glorious Miyamoto and Rabbids bit, the solidarity-against-Vivendi stuff, and my two favourite moments of E3 ever. The first involved Antti from RedLynx marching towards the stage only to face-plant into the podium to massive applause. The second is when the curtains came up on Miz, back to the audience, white gloves – do I remember white gloves? – conducting a level of Child of Eden. Every year Ubisoft reminds us that games are brilliant. Girl. Wood.

-Christian

To see this content please enable targeting cookies. Manage cookie settings

from EnterGamingXP https://entergamingxp.com/2020/06/five-of-the-best-e3-conferences-%e2%80%a2-eurogamer-net/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=five-of-the-best-e3-conferences-%25e2%2580%25a2-eurogamer-net

[recentanimenews]

The Final Fantasy VII Remake Demo is a Small Taste of Nostalgia-Shattering Wonder

It isn’t an easy undertaking to live up to the legacy of a game like Final Fantasy VII. When you try to develop a remake of one of the most highly-regarded and influential JRPGs in video game history, you want to make sure you’re giving it your all. But if the recent demo for Final Fantasy VII: Remake on the Playstation 4 is any indication, this upcoming title is far more than just a trip down memory lane.

After all the anticipation we've built up since its announcement back in 2015, the wait is thus far proving to have been worth it. We have almost a month left to go before the game releases on April 10, but this demo offers a substantial but tantalizing taste of what’s to come and leaves you wanting more.

The demo kicks off in the very first chapter of the story. Fresh off an illegal train ride into the city of Midgar, Cloud Strife is a mercenary working under the payday of a ragtag eco-terrorist group known as AVALANCHE. Together, they launch the very first wave of attacks against Shinra, a strong and greedy electric company who drains the very lifesource of the planet to power cities. As you infiltrate one of Shinra’s Mako reactors, you control Cloud and AVALANCHE leader Barret as you take on SOLDIER military forces, armored mechs, and monsters who stand in your way.

Almost immediately, fans of the original game should recognize many of the elements in the new demo. The iconic introduction to the original PlayStation classic is lovingly recreated from that first shot of Aerith’s prayer to the earth to Cloud’s epic entrance to the memorable music and leitmotifs scattered throughout. Already, this demo plays on more than 20 years worth of nostalgia, recognizing what longtime fans love about the characters and story and breathing new life into them.

But even from such a short demo, it’s clear that this new version is more than just a “Greatest Hits” showcase. FFVII: Remake makes its own mark from the very first time you swing Cloud’s Buster Sword. Taking cues from other Square Enix titles like Kingdom Hearts, the action-RPG mechanics offer a more exciting combat experience. Rather than simply recreating its traditional JRPG style (though the full game will let you access that), you become more involved in the fight as you slice away at enemies and time your dodging and blocking against them to gain an advantage. As you fill up your ATB Gauge with standard hits and proper defense, you get access to more abilities and stronger attacks you can use to turn the tide.

In many aspects, the game plays pretty smoothly. The blending of reflex-based hack-and-slash gameplay and tactical RPG elements is an unexpected, but gratifying way to revamp FFVII’s turn-based roots. But for me, at least, it wasn’t exactly a seamless mixture. It felt a bit odd for me to wait for my ATB Gauge for almost every action other than attacking. While it makes sense to use it for things like Abilities, Limits, and Magic, I was thrown off when I had to fill it up to use regular consumables like Potions and Ethers. It made intense fights like the Scorpion Sentinel boss a little more nerve-wracking when I couldn’t exactly heal on the fly. But the slow-mo Tactical Mode at least gave me a nice little breather between volleys where I could cool my head and rethink my strategies. 

As an action-RPG, these new mechanics try to lend themselves to both halves, putting emphasis on action while paying homage to its RPG origins. For my very first go at it, that blend presented a bigger hurdle than I expected. But that isn’t to say the gameplay isn’t good or that the challenge isn’t exciting. Being able to switch between characters and take full advantage of their capabilities is incredibly rewarding, and it helps when the characters themselves are all too fun to play as. Between Cloud’s enormous slashes and counters and Barrett’s long-range gunfire and burst shots, the time I spent mastering their movesets was nothing short of kickass. I’m always prepared to tackle a learning curve when it comes to unique gameplay, and when the game itself is as fun and intriguing as it is in these first few minutes, I absolutely can’t wait to see what happens when I get stronger. 

Of course, that’s not all the demo has going for it. With a story as memorable as FFVII’s, the game’s dazzling graphics, detailed world, and fully-realized characters present a considerable glow-up. The brief character interactions between Cloud and the members of AVALANCHE offer so much more depth and charm than what might have been possible back in 1997. Having party members quip in the middle of fights and people who cheer you on as you traverse the nooks and crannies of the Mako Reactor offer an engrossing and even amusing narrative than what I remember when I first played it. It made me all too excited to revisit the rest of the iconic cast and see their transformations for the latest console generation.

  But like any good preview, it's short and sweet and only hints at the larger game yet to come. I have to hold on to my full thoughts on the game when it releases next month. But the FFVII: Remake demo should be enough to whet your appetite and prep you for the battles ahead. Rest assured, I will be playing this short snippet as much as I can until we can finally get our hands on the real deal.

The end is finally in sight, and our patience is all but rewarded with this demo. It’s a great teaser for your reintroduction to classic moments, but it already stands out on its own as a refreshingly fun and challenging first impression.

  Will you be checking out the demo? What was your favorite bout of nostalgia? Comment below and let us know!

----

Carlos is a freelance features writer for Crunchyroll. Their favorite genres range from magical girls to over-the-top robot action, yet their favorite characters are always the obscure ones. Check out some of their satirical work on The Hard Times.

Do you love writing? Do you love anime? If you have an idea for a features story, pitch it to Crunchyroll Features!

By: news+feed@crunchyroll.com

[almaruf-blog]

Chronicles of Online Games

Web based games are typically alluded to as innovation, rather than which a portion of the individuals consider it a classification. These games are commonly played over a system which is framed with the utilization of PCs, these days these web based games are for the most part played over the Internet. Prior the greater part of the internet games which were being played were single player games, yet now multiplayer games are additionally accessible.

In the mid 1990s, the vast majority of the games step by step moved from LAN systems administration to the utilization of the Internet utilizing different conventions, for example, TCP/IP. Fate was the one which summed up, just as advanced, the fundamental origination behind the dead match. It is a type of game where numerous players strife with one another; it was one of the most novel structures around then.

Period of Empires is a type of procedure and it was hard to play such games by the utilization of modems or LAN. However, with the fast development in the Internet, 먹튀검증 it turned out to be anything but difficult to play such multiplayer games by burrowing the conventions over the Internet which is essential for the game to work. With the development of such amusement, it was conceivable to make different game corners where gamers can undoubtedly come and have their discussions in regards to the game.

With the development in this field, just as innovation of consoles, the controls of this kind of game moved a piece onto the utilization of different consoles which are accessible available today. These consoles fill in as comparability to PCs and can likewise be at the same time utilized by the gamers.

[thomasroach]

Sekiro Review: Shinobis Die Many Times

The post Sekiro Review: Shinobis Die Many Times appeared first on Fextralife.

In this Sekiro Shadows Die Twice Review I’ll explore FromSoftware’s new Action game and answer some burning questions you have such as: Is Sekiro like Souls? Is Sekiro worth buying? and Is Sekiro a good game?. Please be mindful that this review contains mild gameplay spoilers of mechanics and an early game area.

Important: To understand our score, read the Fextralife Review Guidelines. Sekiro falls between “Great” and “Brilliant”. Every reviewer has their own “compass” for what numbers mean, so for reference I gave Dark Souls Remastered an 8.8, Nier: Automata an 8.7, and Bloodborne a 9 and I love them all.

Sekiro Review: Shinobis Die Many Times

Genre: Action-Adventure Developed by: FromSoftware Published by: Activision (Int) FromSoftware (JP) Release date: March 22th, 2019 Platforms: PS4 (review platform PS4 Pro), Xbox One, PC. Review code provided by Activision. Price at the time of the review: $59.99

  Sekiro Story & Setting

Sekiro takes us to a fantastic version of Sengoku Japan. Sengoku is a famous period of Japanese history, during which war ravaged the entire country for over 150 years. The strife and unrest was fueled by political cues, led to the extermination of prominent Japanese families, and completely reshaped the power structure of Japan.

Given the enormous scale of the battles, Sengoku is a popular time for both historians and fiction writers, which usually focuses on the Battle of Sekigahara and the surrounding main actors.

Sekiro does not follow this path, instead creating a fictional version of Japan and the Sengoku period, and adding mythical elements such as an ancient Dragon Bloodline to fuel the plot. This is likely a good choice, as the gaming world is saturated with Nobunaga and Tokugawa references by now.

Unlike previous works, Sekiro delivers the story in a more straight-forward manner. With a set and even voiced protagonist, the world moves in a much more coherent story than Souls games might have done for others. Everything is explained quite clearly and dialogue options can be revisited as many times as possible. This does not mean that Lore hunters won’t have anything to do, as there is plenty of folklore and FromSoftware’s own interpretation of Yokai to find and talk about. It is just a lot easier to access for the average player that might skip reading item descriptions.

So how is the story, then?

The protagonist is a well realized character, and it is clear from the get-go that you will find story twists that challenge the initial world view. This does not detract from the plot and the decisions the player must make, and you will find yourself intrigued by the many characters you meet and want to see their tale through. I very much enjoyed talking to NPCs as I explored the landscape, and the concept of revisiting memories and advancing the story through trips to the past was well executed. All in all, FromSoftware has successfully made their storytelling more accessible, and whilst I miss some of the quirkiness of the old ways, many will appreciate this new approach.

The Wolf is a dedicated Shinobi, following the “Iron Code”, but what twists and surprises await will test the limits of your devotion

Sekiro Gameplay

Action games live and die by gameplay, and Sekiro has delivered a fine-tuned and glorious realization of a Shinobi fantasy. That said, and before I go any further, I must disclaim that we just came out of playing DMC5, and that has the best gameplay possible for an action title, so Sekiro is against some really tough competition in this regard.

Gameplay focuses on the optimization of the skills of your main katana, the Kusabimaru. You will also gain access to special Prosthetic Tools that allow you to grapple onto ledges and enemies, as well as throw Shurikens, Firecrackers, a flame thrower of sorts, and much more. This sounds really enticing but players soon discover that, like many action games, you aren’t going to get your toys for a while. This is an understood concept, however I personally felt that the initial progression (say the first 5 hours of the game) dragged on in specifically keeping my toys away from me.

This was likely done to encourage you to learn how to use your katana properly, which will challenge players with its complex deflect, counter and posture systems. However it had the strange effect of making me ignore the prosthetic completely, as its effects on enemies were sub-par, and instead focus on stealth to get by, with an overly-cautious approach. Why did this happen? Well because:

Death is truly horrifying

With Souls, I learned to not care about souls. If I died and lost all my souls, I would go co-op a boss I knew and make them back, or simply focus on upgrading my weapons instead. Sekiro’s death penalty is extremely punishing when you start the game, taking away 50% of your experience and gold each time you respawn. This is mitigated by something called Unseen Aid, which negates the loss but has a measly 30% chance of triggering and then goes down from there. You can keep Skillpoints you have earned (meaning you filled a bar and it turned into a 1), but anything after that is going to slowly disappear as you attempt a hard section. Further, since you have no easy access to merchants, your gold will most likely be gone too if you don’t have the mechanics down.

But wait, there’s more! If you die a lot, you will also spread Dragonrot, which sickens NPCs and actively blocks their questlines. A completionist like me is thus extremely alarmed right from the get go: I don’t want to miss out! So the game’s start saw me being overly-cautious and wasting time with stealth because I didn’t want to risk my lack of familiarity with the controls deleting half a bar of experience gained and ruin NPC quests.

But why do you care about XP?

The game’s main attraction comes in the form of Skills and Skill Trees, that players can unlock to improve Sekiro’s arsenal of moves. Some of these skills are passive and make a large difference in the core mechanics, whilst others are active and perform extraordinary feats. But they all cost Skillpoints, and if you’re dying a lot you’re unlikely to fill up that bar. So you’re stuck in this strange place where you really don’t want to die because there’s no chance to regain your losses, which means you might want to go farm to fill the XP bar and spend all your gold before running into any boss room.

Git Gud!

The essence of any souls game is to overcome a challenge, and people will say “Just Git Gud“. Elitism aside, this is valid commentary, and it is extremely important for veteran souls players to truly discard their previous muscle memory when approaching this game. Players who struggle with quick reactions will also want to fully explore the Stealth mechanic and focus on gathering those skillpoints to unlock important perks. But most of all, you’ll want to be specific about progressing the game in an optimal order, as the Prosthetic Tools you find can be key to success in certain fights.

So, is the gameplay good?

Sekiro’s gameplay is the most refined FromSoftware work to date, taking it a step further than Bloodborne went. The split-second execution of amazing maneuvers and counters is flashy and satisfying, and the many skills and prosthetic tool upgrades available complement the light RPG “Stats” upgrades the player can pursue. All in all, players might be disheartened during the first few hours by the extremely punishing adjustment period, but there’s a specific wall that “lifts” if you progress in the right order, and after that you will get in the “gud” zone of “git gud” and flow through the game with great enjoyment.

Gameplay includes fan-favorite Builds, as you have limited points without farming and could create great combinations.

Sekiro Audio & Visual

Fromsoftware began conceptualization of Sekiro in 2015, and this unfortunately shows. The game’s graphics are good, but they are nothing amazing and the PS4 pro visuals are not necessarily outstanding. The rendering of backgrounds and locations is quite scenic, however, and the level design and enemy concepts are fantastic and very enjoyable.

That said, when you go into the “Action” line you start to compete with games like God of War, Assassin’s Creed Odyssey and Devil May Cry, and FromSoftware is not at the top of that game (yet). We are quite looking forward to their next engine and the visual upgrades that will come with it, but for now Sekiro sits at a very comfortable “Good graphics” veredict. They are scenic and set the mood, they won’t blow your mind away.

*Note for PC players: You will likely see better graphics than console users, this is a score for PS4 users.

Performance is of course an important factor, and we found that the game’s performance is stable, and have experienced no crashes or glitches. The framerate is not locked so it will fluctuate wildly, but we have not encountered any Blighttown-esque slideshows so you can go forth and slay with precision.

Level Design is a strongsuit of FromSoftware and they successfully delivered an intriguing and interconnected world with plenty of hidden areas to explore. The sheer size of some areas, like Ashina Outskirts, is rather daunting for any completionist. The world building truly delivers in this area, and brings up the overall score.

The music score for Sekiro was rather underwhelming to me, but it might be more impactful to those unfamiliar with Japanese tunes. There’s a definitive tempo to the combat sequences and each area has their own idle and action scores that ramp up the intensity of your play. In this regard, FromSoftware is competing with itself and has a difficult task in attempting to match or surpass the fantastic work of their previous titles. Since none of the songs stuck in my head after playing for hours and hours, I would say they have fallen just short of the task, but still delivered a great score.

Finding all the hidden corners of the world is really fun, and exploration is very much a thing.

Sekiro Replayability

This is the biggest question on the internet, and one that is extremely difficult to answer: What’s Sekiro’s Replayability? The honest answer is: we don’t know because it all depends. The game is extremely challenging to start, which will add a lot of hours to your playthrough if you aren’t a skilled player, but even beyond that there are many nook and crannies to explore if you want to obtain all the upgrade materials, special tools and rare quick items. This means that a skilled player with little interest in exploration is likely looking at 20 hours of gameplay for one playthrough, whilst a less skilled player or completionist will instead get at least 40.

But what next? Why keep playing?

Sekiro has intriguing NPC questlines as well as several endings: that alone would likely encourage most to go onto NG+. But there’s more, in NG+ you will get to face enemies with a fuller arsenal of skills, and since there are so many trees and you can only (without farming) fill up about 2 of them in one go, you will probably want to revisit and become even more flashy.

The motivation to go to NG+, to me, was always about getting more things, or facing a boss again. With Sekiro, you can do both of these things and I feel FromSoftware has done a good job in this department, so that you are happy to continue your adventure because you want to make your Wolf even more amazing.

Character Progression provides plenty of reason to keep looking around for things

Sekiro Pricepoint

As with all our reviews, Pricepoint covers the contextualization of a game, to see if you should buy it now or wait for a bargain, or skip it altogether! In Sekiro’s case, clocking in 20-40 hours minimum, it is rather comparable to other action games in the market such as Last of Us or God of War.

What Sekiro lacks in graphics, it makes up in replayability as you continue into New Game Plus to unlock more skills and try different endings, which would net a good 20 hours added to both skilled and unskilled players.

Relative to the market, there are not many releases this Spring, besides DMC5 which you really should have bought already, so Sekiro is a good investment for your gaming dollar as it will certainly entertain you for a considerable amount of time. The game has no microtransactions or announced DLC, meaning that at the time of writing you’re getting a full experience for your money, so this is a big plus to the score.

The lack of multiplayer is certainly to the detriment of both Pricepoint and Replayability, but I feel that Fromsoftware’s unique touch and approach shines through the game and makes it a day one buy for any Souls fan ready to let go of RPG and get fully into Action.

The Price is Right!

Sekiro Review Final Thoughts

Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice has been a roller coaster for Souls fans, who were initially thrilled, then disappointed at no multiplayer or customization, then reassured by a skill tree and upgrades, then concerned at possible ease from resurrection, to now horrified of actually dying.

This emotional rollercoaster matches the game’s story and setting well, and should fuel your thirst for deathblows, as you annihilate everyone that stands in your path. The Wolf is a surprisingly well-realized character, following a convincing story path, with challenging gameplay that rewards the bold.

Sekiro is not souls, and might not surpass souls, but it is an excellent side-step and a worthy journey for FromSoftware followers as they wait for their favorite developer to deliver more RPG content, hopefully incorporating some of the outstanding action of Shadows Die Twice.

    The post Sekiro Review: Shinobis Die Many Times appeared first on Fextralife.

Sekiro Review: Shinobis Die Many Times published first on https://juanaframi.tumblr.com/