#creating meaning in life
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me when i get the opportunity to think about speculative biology and non-existent game mechanics in media i like
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#the candle creatures are revamps#i had created the idea for them years ago but i wanted to redo them slightly with new eyes#the “dark variants” of the mantas and birds are variants of them that have adapted for life in wasteland and the forests#and also#i like the idea of candle creatures that live in villages or within communities#that are sort of akin to strays that the whole community takes care of#means alot to me#this isnt everything ive been thinking about#ill make a couple diagrams about the large birds#yknow the ones from rhythm that we see once and never again. yeah.#they exist in my heart#anyway#skycotl#sky cotl#sky children of the light#sky#sky:cotl#sky: cotl#thatskygame#speculative biology#<- i guess?#im having fun ok#im happy to answer questions about my thoughts btw!#might be answered on my main if i cant muster a doodle or something#but i love answering asks#so if ur interested id love to hear thoughts :)
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you always land on all fours
#umineko#umineko spoilers#ikuko hachijo#ikukos turn for a more serious piece... the old man has reigned for too long#now. INCREDIBLY LONG INCOHERENT TAGS RANT INCOMING FAIR WARNING HAS BEEN GIVEN:#it makes me so so sad how little discussion there is about specifically ikuko because imho she fits so neatly into a lot of the more#overarching Big Themes of the game in a way that i have not ever really seen people take notice of or point out in a meaningful way#like even just off of the top of my head. the significance of names and what it means to go by a name that's Not Yours (she has like 4+)#what it Means to be a witch how it represents a person's deepest insecurities and flaws & how its at its core a coping mechanism#the fact that it takes two to create a universe and trying to do it on your own anyways has the capacity to bring you intense misery#^ (how she's shown to be extremely dismissive of her own work and skill until a collaborator comes into her life and helps/encourages her)#and even the family/patriarchy/misogyny stuff that is so prevalent in the rest of the game comes back around to her. even her Only Friend#(young&stupid atp to be fair) remarks that shes Weird for being unmarried + the little she does say about her past invites the question of#to what extent her self-image stems from her family deeming her a freak outcast & effectively disowning her while celebrating her brothers#and i have lot in my mind about the witch thing specifically because i think her particular situation is very reflective of what umineko's#entire magic system and fantasy facet as a whole is meant to represent for an individual. from what little we see of (what is presumably)#her Real personality she is shown to be deeply self conscious in a way that is JARRINGLY diametrically opposed to both 1.) what we see in#featherine and 2.) what we see when she is acting as a Public Figure. because both of the above are very much purposeful acts that she is#putting on in order to obfuscate her true self. and i have always been very resolute & adamant about not totally equating her to featherine#not only because im very firmly in the camp of “featherine is the avatar of the Pen Name & tohya is part of her too” but also very much b/c#i feel very strongly that the stark differences between the two are very centrally relevant to her character & her psyche. as is the case#with most other witches featherine's personality traits serve to reveal/magnify a lot of ikukos inner workings by playing on her#insecurities/reversing them e.g. ikuko being very quick to downplay her skill/achievements becomes featherine being the COMPLETE opposite#to the point where she barely registers even other witches as living beings rather than just fun touys. BUT even though i do champion the#ikuko/featherine separation so hard i ALSO think it is purposefully relevant that at first glance the line between them seems so blurry#her introduction implying a more nebulous separation between her reality/fantasy counterpart is i think is an intentional move on her part#like it is part of the front she is putting up when acting as the Author. as opposed to Ikuko the person who we (in a way ironically very#similar to the way that the Real Battler is presumably only shown during the boatscene) only very briefly get to see take up screentime#which even on a meta level lines up very well with her apparent underlying nature as a like. extremely private largely reserved/shy person#hit tag limit but if by some miracle anyone is still reading this thank you... please see ikuko with the love she deserves... ok ily byeee
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Stan and Soos' sorta-Dad and Sonployee relationship


We of course have Soos assigning Stan as his father figure the moment he got hired



But Stan holds that moment dear too, with Soos becoming his main source of company after the Mystery Shack, his first big success, was starting to hit rock bottom. And he made sure to keep the screwdriver that led Soos to him for a decade which unfortunately gets stolen by a certain time traveler...
(Their meeting being a paradox of Soos' family leading him to them is super sweet too!)



Playing one game of catch with their dads still was a dream for both of them, even when it was clear that it'll never happen, even when Soos knows that the Pines are his family and he shouldn't care about that biological deadbeat, even when Filbrick threw Stan away like trash.


But both of them end up finding closure with each other anyway.



Along with Stan likely teaching him how to fix golf carts (to the point that Soos is pretty skilled at it now), he also taught him boxing and tried to do something about his birthday, which is another sore spot for the both of them.

In the Sooscast, we have Stan continuing with the podcast despite learning this horrifying truth/not understanding what the hell is going on.
Noticeably, we see that Stan is a lot more lenient on Soos in comparison to Dipper, mostly because Stan doesn't project most of his issues onto him. (Not that he's immune from chores or shitty tasks but that's the burden of being a sonployee...)
And in NWHS, Stan trusts him to guard the lab with no questions asked (even if that ended up being foiled by Soos loving Mabel and Dipper too)




The comic story is Soos helping Stan regain and continue one of his childhood dreams, with the website having Stan continuing to draw on the Stan o' War.




And while unfortunately most of their father-son relationship content is at the end or after the series, Alex still said a lot about them in the commentary and interviews!
Before they met, Soos was someone who appeared to only really have his Abuelita and cousin, while Stan had.... a baby goat. And a disappearing frilly lizard.


We have Stan claiming that the reason why he never had children was because of his own dad and that money is basically his child (which just loops around back to his money obsession being his desire to get back his family)




But even still, he passes down the Shack and fez to Soos with barely any pause, the fez in particular being tied up with a lot of complex emotions. But Soos getting his own suit fitted just for him and not being pressured to wear a girdle to hide his weight kinda symbolizes to me that the role of Mr Mystery is now free from that baggage.


And whenever we'd end up getting Stan o' War stories, I'm sure the two of them are gonna get way more father-son moments
(Filbrick's impact on Stan post, Stan projecting on Dipper post)
#soos helping stan heal from not getting the attention he craved from his shitty dad and vice versa!!!!#soos helping stan regain that childhood dream!!!#soos you son of all time!!!!#stan being there for soos' millennial hobbies he doesn't understand#soos ramirez#stan pines#stanley pines#gravity falls#but also soos being the first person to show stan unconditional kindness in decades....#a post created from the power of spite driven by 'wow i wish stan was a dad' people in 2025.....#honestly most of the things alex brings up when talking about soos is WHOA I LOVE FOUND FAMILY STAN IS HIS DAD#i know some people are like 'um the pines are still biologically related how is that found family' but#considering how so many people insist that stan's bond with the kids would 'mean so much more if he was a grandpa/dad' i'd say otherwise#anyway stan likely had some good influences on soos!#like letting the kid try his beer and cigars and thereby putting soos off those for life#and having soos see the hippies as potential customers and helping stan overcome his hate for profit!!!#truly the role model of all time#......who also probably passed down a bunch of misogynistic jokes 😔😔😔#he's a loving dad not a perfect one khasdkjdhsakdsa
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tfone au where OP is created as the last of the primes but way after them, a sparkling born at what were thought to be the last days of the war against the quintessons, the beginning of a new generation of peace after eons of war. a child meant to be loved and raised knowing nothing of war nor sacrifice.
he's kept mostly out of the spotlight by his siblings, who don't wish to expose him to everyone's optics so young, and want to wait until the war is done and over to properly introduce him to their people.
except of course the primes are betrayed and murdered by sentinel, the war is lost and everyone who knows and cared for the truth is either banished or outright killed in order to suppress it.
and the high guard, the ones the primes trusted the most, the ones that were supposed to protect them, the ones who failed in their most important duty, have to make a choice. to take the last prime, their last hope, with them to the surface, a hostile environment where there's little to no supplies and where they'll be hunted down by both sentinel and the quintessons as the biggest threat to their regimen.
or hide him in plain sight. place him where sentinel won't think to look for him. one more sparkling among many. and hope it will be enough to keep him alive. pray to primus that he'll protect his last child long enough for them to come back for him when it's safer (even if most of them have already lost their faith on him when he allowed the rest of his children to be massacred like that)
they almost lose their resolve when they realize they will have to take the little one's cog away in order to make him blend in with the rest of the newborns (and oh do they burn with murderous intent when they see what sentinel has done to their people but it's not the time yet-) but in the end they decide an impaired little prime is better than a dead one.
and so in the chaos of thirteen dead primes and a sudden energon crisis, a little sparkling who very few mechs really knew about and even fewer had seen completely vanishes. and in the depths of iacon a mech in charge of a new batch of newborns scratches their helm in confusion as they realize they must have miscounted the first time.
optimus prime is quietly erased from any official records by sentinel, written off as dead when they find a sparkling's frame mangled beyond recognition after an attack on the base of those rebels that insist on being a thorn on his side. killing the sparkling hadn't been precisely in his plans, he probably could've found some use for it after all, but he's not particularly upset about it either.
and orion pax grows up with an ache on his spark that tells him he's missing something far more important than a t-cog and dreams of gentle and loving hands, cradling him against the frames of mechs he cannot recall the faces of.
#i talk a lot <3#transformers#transformers one#optimus prime#orion pax#baby prime orion au#this is mostly an excuse for me to draw the primes and baby OP later on. just to be clear.#i WILL be drawing this at some point lmao#tbh i'm a little uncertain how i want things to progress#because on one hand it would be very tasty and tense if sentinel recognized optimus during the race#but that means a lot of changes very early on in the plot and i would have to do a lot of Thinking on how to justify getting the gang#to still pick up bee and elita. cause i love them <3#i do think it'd be very funny if the high guard's plan worked like a charm except for the very tiny fact that they didn't count#on orion being an absolute hellion. like. this kid is Not Going Unnoticed and it's completely his own fault lmao#in this version maybe a member of the high guard stayed behind to keep an eye on orion and is able to get them out before they're killed#but instead of taking them to where the primes fell they take them directly to the high guard#which is very awkward because it's a very moving and emotional moment for the high guard who are finally reunited with their little prime#all grown up and healthy and blessedly *alive*. except orion doesn't fucking remember any of them and is very confused as to why#the legendary warriors of cybertron are getting all weepy over him. they finally explain the truth to him which is a Fucking Bomb#to drop on anyone but especially a group of kids who almost got killed by the person they all thought the world of just hours ago#they also return orion's t-cog to him which would create some tension between him and the rest of the gang because this time#he's the only one getting his cog back. add to it that they were just told he's the equivalent of a demi-god and... well.#there's a gap between him and them that wasn't there before#on the other version of events that follows canon more closely everything goes the same up until the gang finds the primes in the cave#and wake up alpha trion who now not only has to deal with the fact the rest of his siblings are dead but that he missed fifty cycles#of his baby brother's life. that the only sibling he has left does not remember him or his true identity at all.#he has to choose between telling him the truth which has the risk of unbalancing him in a critical moment where he cannot afford to#be distracted because they're being hunted down. or let him remain unaware. let him forget their family and the love they had for him#but letting him remain free of the knowledge of what he lost and the heartbreak it would bring.
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Society if in TOS we had Doctor Mccoy who was an expert in Human Medicine and the Human Heart contrasted with Doctor M'Benga who was an expert in Alien (Specifically Vulcan) Medicine and the Vulcan Heart and they often clashed/collaborated on how to treat Spock whenever he was injured or acting strange....medicine in space...the down home doctor vs the extraterrestrial physician. How to be humane to the non-Human. Spock's struggle between Human and Vulcan made real, made flesh, made immediate, on the surgeon's table.
#I will create my own M'Benga out of the two episodes where he appears in TOS#s- ---nnn w has NOTHING to do with my characterization of Doctor M'Benga#M'Benga#Doctor M'Benga#Doctor Mccoy#Leonard Mccoy#TOS#star trek#star trek TOS#what if we bickered about what it meant to be a Person and a Man of Medicine and we were both Doctors (and Spock's life was in our hands)#I just KNOOW Mccoy would hit him with 'You've spent so much time with Vulcans you've forgotten what it means to be HUMAN!'#and I'm sure M'Benga would have his own retort for that - it's something he gets a lot#ARE YOU SEEINGMYVISION???? PLEASE??
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it's time for spartacus :)
#crassus lost his unfair +20 Emotional Appeal Due To Life Circumstances but gained a much more important#+3000 Most Interesting Character Of His Generation advantage which means he's finally returned to A Character with Characterization#which IN TURN MEANS i get to work on spartacus again babyyyyyy. we have something to work against. etc etc.#also I wrote a separate version of trikaranos entirely from calamus and (redacted)'s points of view to put the pin in Something Specific#not to be vague about it. i'll post it. if you've been here for awhile you will remember me saying something about the crassus comic#being the set up for the spartacus comic. the thing that bridges the two is the third character that's present in everything#which is not actually rome. it's The Crowd. in order to have a crowd one must create characters in a crowd. or whatever#im TIRED this month has been Too Much actually. there's something about getting bad doctor news the day before christmas#that feels borderline cartoonish.#spartacus tag#drawing tag
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I think it’s good to remember Jimmy doesn’t revel in others misery more so feels less miserable when people are as unhappy as he is. The acts he does do not bring him any pleasure, it’s more so the ending effect and reward and even then he’s not exactly happy just content in not feeling lesser.
It’s very easy to characterize his behavior as something cartoonishly villainous and cathartic and, while their is some catharsis there, it is ultimately the case of him acting out deep internalized feelings and frustrations against other people (possibly even himself) that he doesn’t necessarily like doing or even feel relief doing.
It’s both a conscious and unconscious behavior of his that too often gets chalked up to “Jimmy likes/gets off to tormenting others” and it’s a little one note to what is actually displayed in game.
#like he does manipulate and does enjoy having power but you can see how much it stresses him out#and how he is literally always waiting for that sort of joy in his life while#also not wanting to create it himself so when he sees it in others he feels they are being given it undeserved so he must knock them down a#peg in his mind whether he is aware of this backwards thinking or not#he’s notice dick dastardly he does not need to ruin a moment or be mean all the time if he’s feeling fine or having fun#it’s just he’s typically in a state of neutral or slightly agitated so it’s easier to set a person like him#off but like in the party if the mood is good and he’s happy he’s fine like he was not looking to ruin the party he just picked up on#Curly’s mood and needed to know cause it def must’ve felt personally about#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#jimmy mouthwashing
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imagine this family trying to take a picture for a christmas card, or any type of family picture for that matter
bloody hell I was waiting for something like this
(ik im late as, but people never put the decorations away right after the 25th...)
(and yes the last two parts of the Alien Cody arc is still happening)
#noco family au#total drama#total drama noah#total drama cody#total drama noco#total drama raj#total drama dave#total drama mike#total drama svetlana#total drama Owen#thanks for the ask!#I wanted to get this done at least on the 26th but I was simply too Out Of It#time is an illusion#currently contemplating events of my life that have led me to creating this au#I mean really when else was I gonna do a Christmas thing might as well go at it if its still December eh?#4am thoughts
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Jayce “Facebook-Mom” Talis-Medarda
#whatever. go my meljayviklings#created by my pookie @_chipsip on insta and bsky#she’s the realest ever legit inflicted ten counts of domestic MelJayVik into my head like two months ago and they won’t leave#here are their names#April is the one in the left. she’s the jayce/viktor kid & 4 yrs older than her sister#she’s super fun I promise she just can’t mask to save her life#to the right is Andromeda#Andy for short#she is the MelJay baby and my favorite lowkey… don’t tell April#I can’t even begin the rundown on this au. they’re so silly. their parents are so silly.#everytime I think of them it’s like ten shots of dopamine to my brain#Ximena is a supportive Facebook grandma#yup yup#viktor doesn’t have social media#Mel has an account for her art curating business that’s SUPPOSED to be professional#but she’s under Jayce’s post like ‘my loves!!’#Jayce posts this and minutes after Ximena sends it to the girls Andy’s calling like dad. u have five seconds to remove the post#he doesn’t mean to embarrass them honest he’s just so proud of them#sigh. SIGHHHH#arcane#meljayvik#MelJayVik fan kids#fankids#arcane fankids#my art
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SHERLOCK | Martin Freeman as John Watson
#inspiration for creating gifs was the wonderful @meandhisjohn#he emerged from the mist like a ghost with sadness etched on his face like the imprint of a recent storm#In his eyes a shadow of despair lingered but at the same time an unrelenting thirst for life beat in his heart#the world around him seemed empty a lifeless canvas devoid of color and sound#his brown jacket rough and worn a symbol of the storm raging within his soul gave him a harsh yet captivating appearance#and at that momen like a beacon of light in utter darkness he met him#their gazes met and the world around them burst into vibrant hues#as if a painter inspired by a divine muse had poured his palette onto the canvas#john lost in the abyss of despair suddenly found purpose meaning in his existence#he was like a ship tossed about in a tempest finding sanctuary and calm in a harbor#their encounter became a turning point illuminating his life with a gentle light comparable to the first rays of dawn#breaking through the darkness of night#love immense and unfathomable enveloped their hearts forging them into one#It was like a magical elixir awakening forgotten feelings and dreams#martin freeman#mf/serial#bbc sherlock#john watson#sherlock#sherlock bbc#benedict cumberbatch#pilot
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Fingers crossed for my job interview tomorrow! 🤞
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something something all the apollo kids are seen as the performers of the camp which feeds into their need to mask their emotions so they can keep up the act for the others something something
#cabin 7#percy jackson#will solace#kayla knowles#austin lake#michael yew#lee fletcher#what i mean is that they each have a big personality around camp#and they spent their whole life constantly performing for people (through music or other arts)#and now their personality is a big part of their act#Ex: Will being empathetic cuz he's a healer#(healing is considered an art cuz bedside manner is just acting)#anyways#they feel like they have to abide their 2D personailty they created in order to keep their act/art/performance up#so they never allow others to see them feel other emotions that dont allign with what they 'should' feel
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every time im forced to remember that t*mberkon exists an angel loses its wings. violently
#rimi talks#the problem with blacklisted tags. is that every time i see a post in the timkon tag that is#caught by my filter im like. well im gonna block op but let's just make sure it's actually smth i want to block for#and then it always is and it's always my own fault for hitting the show post button to be sure#but even when i don't hit the button i still sit there going 😒😐🙄😬😕#bc every time i remember people actually like modern b*rnard it's so.#tdr worst comic ive ever fucking read in my life. comic written for people who hate comics. garbage trash heap comic#and the idea that anyone actually read and enjoyed that shit ............... unfathomable. how.#even if you don't care about tim as a character it's so internally inconsistent + fucking gross#like megfitz i know you're white but jesus fucking christ.#and i think of this every time i see that stupid goddamn quirked up whiteboy 🤪 mentioned.#like oh gee yeah the ''some impoverished qpoc get murdered to advance a rich white boy story about gentrification'' comic. you like That?#like yeah willingham created him but boy megfitz really made him her own! i mean this in the most derogatory way possible#anyway. all of this to say. 2025 and i still can't go into the timkon tag without seeing this shit 😔😔😔#of course it's very possible that tim/ber and tim/ber/kon fans haven't even read tdr. so they don't know about the gross gentrification plot#but. well. that is in and of itself also so annoying 😭😭😭😭#ANYWAYS . fuck tim/ber/kon let's think about timiveskon. konives could be something. they both love star wars. let's go from here
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you know, even tho canonically Thel and pre-rampancy!Cortana knew each other for like only a few hours, I still think a face-to-face interaction between them during the Created era would’ve been neat; esp since even tho they didn’t know each other for too long, Thel was there as Chief grieved and searched for her and likely she became aware at some point what good allies they are with each other, so that still might’ve influenced smth of their interactions as they debated whose galactic socio-political ambitions was the best way forward
#halo#thel vadam#the arbiter#halo arbiter#cortana#halo cortana#cortana halo#thel 'vadam#my post#my posts#but god can you imagine the Created conflict from Thel’s POV? I mean beyond what Outcasts showed#bro watched Chief go crazy of visions of the missing blue lady and that depressing look he gave the holograph of her on Shadow of Intent#bro risked his life to pull Chief and Cortana out of the Flood’s clutches#and then several years later that same blue lady takes over his people and mucks up the progress he made in building a better future#he has to have thoughts about that.#also bonus he canonically has a sour relationship with Halsey so that at least would’ve fueled a snide comment
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This is labeled Lineart Lovers in my files just fyi
#my art#obi wan kenobi#cc 2224#codywan#commander cody#obi wan#star wars#sw tcw#sw tcw fanart#star wars art#star wars the clone wars#the lighting gave me. so many problems#I’m gonna look at this later and think I should tweak things#but that’s just life#you look at things you’ve created and see things you could’ve done better#but that just means you’ve grown#and oh boy am I growing
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does anybody else think about how the aequitas computer is kind of springer’s sibling. “sibling” with heavy heavy heavy quotations because the concept of family we know of is completely arbitrary with tfs and I really don’t like using it often in fact I regret it

#in the LOOSEST terms possible#because I really struggle coming up with another term to refer to ‘predecessor with whom your origin is-#-closely tied to who happens to also be sentient despite having a different body and a slower mind and fewer things to say’#tarantulas loves being the first guy to create life. twice. maybe more who knows#and in that respect springer and aequitas’ existence are fundamentally unique to their species#and that solidarity… well. think with me. what does it mean for a Somewhat Alive computer and a robot to be created in succession#w/ the computer perhaps being a test run for the creator to figure out complex thought processing and how the mind works#springer#aequitas#transformers#Last stand of the wreckers#maccadam
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