#currently relearning how to make gifs

[improbable-outset]

📂 𝐌𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐎’𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐚 𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖 𝐀𝐥𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐭.𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐞

𝐀/𝐍: So I got bored at work and done this. Some of these head cannons might contradict to the current fics I’ve written but who cares, this is fan FICTION. I did try to add both genitals here… but I’m used to writing fem reader when I write for Miguel so there’s heavy emphasis on AFAB reader.

𝐒𝐩𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

📄 𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞.𝐝𝐨𝐜

I see a lot of people writing him as very attentive and soft when it comes to stuff like aftercare which is totally okay. But I like to put a little bit of angst in my writing and personally, I think these tender moments won't come naturally from him. Not yet.

This man has a lot of baggage and is fully aware of it. He lost his daughter and is living a post-tragedy. It’ll take some time to get used to being emotionally vulnerable with someone again, including giving aftercare.

The first few times you did it together, he’s still clueless about how to take care of things. At most, he'll probably hand you his shirt to keep you warm and give you some wet wipes to clean yourself up. You’re going to have to be patient with him since he is a little rusty and trying to relearn these intimate gestures. If you communicate your needs, he’ll do his best to fulfill them.

Tell him you want to shower together and clean each other off, cuddle with him, tell him to stay with you because he makes you feel safe. Sooner than you might expect, he'll be all over you when it comes to you and being attentive to your needs and desires.

📄 𝐁𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Miguel really loves his arms and how big they are. Pretty sure I can recall him carrying an anomaly with one hand before dashing it through the portal. I could be wrong… Of course he’ll take advantage of his strength and that means picking your up with ease whether it’s over his shoulders to spank you, or bridal style to bed if he’s feeling extra romantic.

I see him as a thigh guy when it comes to his partner. He just loves feeling your thighs, whether he’s kissing you passionately with you laid beneath him, or would grasp onto them while going down on you and feeling how your legs tense around him as you fall apart.

If you’re a woman, he will delve into your breasts the second you take your top off for him. Whether you're small or heavy chested, he’ll adore it all the same. Especially when you’re lactating…especially when you’re lactating. Be prepared for him to gently suck on them, maybe even leave some bite marks.

📄 𝐂𝐮𝐦.𝐝𝐨𝐜

A man with his size, he comes a lot, and that's just from one orgasm. That being said, you can imagine how intense it can be when you suck him off and he comes inside of your mouth. It can get messy, very messy, and he can fill your mouth faster than you can anticipate so be prepared.

He likes to watch his cum leaking from your hole after stuffing you with his load. It gives him a sense of pride knowing that he’s capable of doing that to you. He’ll even give you kisses and praise you for taking all of him so well in the end.

On occasion, he does like to spray his cum over your chest and stomach. Though he’d prefer to do it inside so it’s less of a mess to clean up after.

Also might I add, I saw someone had a head cannon that his cum comes out as cobwebs/has a cobweb texture. That might spark some inspiration for future fics… we’ll see.

📄 𝐃𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐬.𝐝𝐨𝐜

I don’t know what it is, but I have a feeling he’d probably jerk off to you pre-relationship. He didn’t know at the time what made you so enticing that he pleasured himself while thinking of you. Maybe it was the way you moved, the way you carried yourself and how smooth you were with everything.

It makes him feel absolutely filthy even thinking back to it, that he allowed himself to think of you in that way. But after a while, he just couldn’t get his mind off of you and reluctantly, he found himself doing it again.

He’s never admitted it to you though and would probably take it to his grave. He doesn’t want to creep you out or think of him as a perv, even after doing it with you several times.

He secretly wants you to use a butt plug on him too or call him a good boy but his pride will never let him admit to it.

📄 𝐄𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Given the fact that Miguel is canonically a cheater, I think it’s safe to say that he has had his fair share of experiences lmao.

I haven’t read the comics but I can see him as the type to fuck around in his late teen years since he was a little rebellious according to the wiki page and supposedly cocky in bed too.

Most of them were probably nothing serious anyways.

If you have no experience and he’s your first, he’ll be as slow and gentle as he can, constantly reassuring you that you’re doing well ect.

📄 𝐅𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Missionary: The classic I’d call it. I think it is obvious that this is one of his favourite positions to do with you: he can see your face and most importantly eye contact. It’s easier to feel your body too, gripping onto your waist and maybe steal a quick kiss in between before he continues to fuck you senseless.

Mating press: Same reasons as doing missionary but he can push himself deeper inside of you with your legs resting on his shoulders with better leverage. He likes to see your legs go limp on his shoulders after he comes inside of you and pulls out.

Doggy style: He loves giving you back shots. What more is there to say? He loves the feeling of your ass against his crotch and he has easier access to your hair to tug from time to time.

Prone bone: Same as doggy style in addition to seeing you bury your face into the pillow to muffle your moans. It’s more comfortable laying down on the bed on both of your parts too.

Lotus: On occasions when the mood is more sensual and romantic than usual and he wants to feel more connected with you, he’d stick to the lotus position. He might just want to do it after a rough day, and feeling your embrace without being on top of you will definitely lift his mood.

📄 𝐆𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐲.𝐝𝐨𝐜

You’re probably going to have to initiate anything remotely unserious during sex if I’m going to be honest. Just like the intimate gestures, it won’t come naturally to him.

Not saying that this man is stone cold, we’ve all seen how he smiled with his daughter and how she was smearing her ice cream on his face in the movie. I think he does have a funny bone deep in his body somewhere under the stoic demeanour. It’ll only take the right person to bring it out. And bear in mind, he doesn’t trust openly.

Maybe chuckling softly before he dips himself to kiss your neck and hearing you whine for more. He might throw a lighthearted witty remark to throw you off. Your reaction amuses him. A lot. Shock, what has he done to you? Definitely see him as a tease but we’ll get to that in a bit.

📄 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐫.𝐝𝐨𝐜

He chooses to keep himself trimmed but with his heroic duties and leading the Spider Society, it’s hard to keep up with his shaving routine

Though, you did mention how you liked his hair brush against your ass when he’s fucking you from behind, so there’s that…

📄 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐜𝐲.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Something that will take time as mentioned earlier. After the loss of his daughter and monitoring the multiverse, he’s had a hard time emotionally connecting with people. Most of the time it’s cause of him shutting everyone out.

Once his emotional barriers have cleared with you, he’ll become more open with his affection especially in bed. He’ll praise you and mumble a few ‘te amo mucho’ while kissing you everywhere and learning every crevice of your body.

📄 𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐟𝐟.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Not as often now that he has you other than watching tapes of you. We’ll get to that in a bit.

But even before you got together, he never had the time to pleasure himself.

Whenever he does come around to do it, it’ll be from the stress and pressure he faces everyday. But he hates the mess he’ll have to clean up after, and there is a lot of mess.

📄 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Breeding kink: I think the majority of Miguel fans agree that he has a breeding kink. Whether you can carry a child or not, he will stuff you as he climaxes. If you do get knocked up and you start to show, he’ll be all over you, reliving the moment of the baby’s conception again and again while kissing all over your swollen stomach. Yes, he misses his fatherhood days and wants to try again with you.

Lactation kink: Just as we discussed earlier, he loves seeing you lactate. It’s one of the things he admires about how your body changes as you carry and grow his child. Catch him suckling on your breast midway as he kisses all over your body.

Bondage (with his webbing): It comes to no surprise that Miguel will use his enhanced abilities and powers to his advantage in bed. That being said, he will use his webbing to limit your ability to move. He might start off with webbing your hands together or maybe tying both wrists to the bedpost, depending on where you do it. It’s amusing to him watching you squirm from his touches while being tied up.

Sensory deprivation: According to cannon, he has enhanced vision and can see in complete darkness, since he doesn’t have Spider Senses, and he will be using that in bed with you. Maybe when you least expect it. He likes fucking you in the dark and watching your reaction while you, on the other hand, lay still in anticipation and react to his different touches. This also might awaken his interest in fear play with you but he won’t discuss that with you unless you're 100% comfortable.

📄 𝐋𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Your shared bedroom is his safe place where he can let loose and lose himself in his desires with you.

He likes doing it in the kitchen. He doesn’t know why it excites him, but seeing you in the middle of either cleaning or cooking and watching how your hips sway with each movement, he can’t help but grab your waist and pull you closer so you can feel his hard on from behind.

On occasions when it is just the two of you in HQ, he’ll probably sneak in a quick fuck with you before a anyone comes in after their mission task and report to him, and he’ll act like nothing just happened between the two of you.

📄 𝐌𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.𝐝𝐨𝐜

One of Miguel’s main motivations is watching you play with Mayday or just handling babies in general. It instantly kicks the breeding kink and baby fever on overdrive and he will take you to bed the minute you arrive home.

Another motivation, as mentioned earlier, is watching the way your body sways gracefully as you complete your domestic tasks. It’s even more enticing when you’re completely oblivious to how sensual you are in his eyes. You’ll be the death of him and you don’t even know it.

📄 𝐍𝐎.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Being called ‘master’ in bed. Though he does like being in control and taking the lead, being called that, especially by his romantic partner, is uncomfortable for him. Having said that, he wouldn’t mind being called ‘sir’ from time to time, especially if you were to use that sultry voice on him. It makes him weak in the knees everytime.

Collars and leashes are a big no too, it hurts his pride being used on him, and seeing it on his partner is…unsettling.

He refrains from using his venom on you too. It was you who initiated the idea but he refused. Physically, the furthest he’ll go is tying you up.

He tries to avoid shower sex, but if you coax him and rile him up enough, he might give in. Just try not to over do it otherwise he’ll stop doing it all together.

📄 𝐎𝐫𝐚𝐥.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Miguel is fully aware how big he is so he wouldn’t expect his you to suck him off if you can’t handle it. But when you do, he’ll be driven up the walls. He loves watching his cock disappear inch by inch and fully engulfed into your pretty mouth.

He watches how your perky lips wrap around his length before you start moving. He’d have to hold back, using every fibre in effort to not grab your hair and start fucking your throat straight. The last thing he wants is for you to gag or chock midway.

He loves giving it to you though. He can’t get enough of how your legs enclose around him as he delves into your sex. He finds it amusing how you would buck your hips up for more friction especially when you whine for more, only for him to grip your sides and hold you down.

📄 𝐏𝐚𝐜𝐞.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Depending on the mood. He’ll be slow and sensual if you want to take your time especially after a long, rough day at HQ and all he wants to do is unwind and make love with you and just pour all of his affection and appreciation in one night.

If you’ve teased him, giving him hints and the ‘fuck me’ eyes throughout the whole day, be prepared because he will not hold back. Since he does have a high stamina, not just in combat but in bed, he’ll rut for hours— and in different positions too.

I mean, you brought this upon yourself so you have to deal with the consequences. Should’ve seen it coming querida, hm?

Sometimes there’s room for both if you have more time together.

📄 𝐐𝐮𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐞.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Definitely would want quick fucks in the morning before he starts his day, especially knowing that the fate of the whole multiverse is dependent on him as he always says to you.

He will be away from you the whole day and expect to be under a lot of pressure and withhold that responsibility, so a quick release inside of you will boost his morning before he has to get out of bed.

📄 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐤.𝐝𝐨𝐜

He’s usually pretty sensible when it comes to having sex in a private space like your bedroom but for some reason, being with you awoken something in him. Maybe it was the way you were a tease.

He never thought he’d be fucking you in the middle of the day while on duty. He reluctantly let you suck him off while he was overseeing the multiverse once. He was stressing out and you insisted on assisting him relief some of that pent up frustration.

📄 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐚.𝐝𝐨𝐜

I don’t think I need to go into full detail here. We all know this man has superhuman stamina. His body releases less fatigue toxins than an ordinary human so he will use that in bed with you.

If you don’t have the same level of energy as him, he wouldn’t mind either taking a break or stopping all together. He’s aware that his high stamina is because of his DNA that not everyone can keep up with.

📄 𝐓𝐨𝐲𝐬.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Other than the butt plug I mentioned earlier, Miguel doesn’t seem to see the use in toys. He’d rather do the work with his hands and his dick. Furthermore, he can always use his powers and enhanced abilities in bed too.

He does use a vibrator with you from time to time just to edge you a little.

📄 𝐔𝐧𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐫.𝐝𝐨𝐜

In time, when Miguel gets in the swing of things he will tease you, especially knowing how bad you want him (and vice versa). Whether it’s hearing you beg him to touch you or to reach your orgasm, Miguel will tease you when he’s in the right mood for it (or when you’re being punished).

Orgasm denial will happen often so don’t think he’ll let you come that easily. He secretly wants you to do the same to him too but, again, his pride will never let him admit to it. Give it time. Trust me.

It’s been a while since he had a connection like this with anyone and having someone want him this much will do things to him.

If he is planning on getting you knocked up, all the teasing goes out the window. He will please you all he can and prepare you before he spills his seeds in you, in hopes of you getting pregnant.

📄 𝐕𝐨𝐥𝐮𝐦𝐞.𝐝𝐨𝐜

I can’t imagine him being the type to be loud in bed but I can definitely see him being vocal, especially when it comes to praising you or coaxing you to come. Sometimes you just can’t control your mouth in the spur of the moment.

He might groan and grunt from time to time when he’s focusing on reaching his climax or when he’s trying to hold back.

And those who want to hear him whimper….maybe try and top him and see how that’ll end up.

📄 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐝.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Been waiting to get to this! He gets off watching holograms sex tapes of you either pleasing yourself or squirting/ejaculating.

He’s able to watch from every angle and will rewatch it again and again until he’s finally alone with you and can see you come in person from his touches.

📄 𝐗-𝐫𝐚𝐲.𝐝𝐨𝐜

We’ve all seen the fandom talking about Miguel fingers being 11 inches. Someone said that his hand is bigger than an A4 piece of paper (Don’t take my word for it lmao)

So it’ll only make sense if he’s dick is big too, same size as his fingers I’d say, maybe an inch or two smaller, because holy fuck he’d split you in half with just his dick!

Pretty girthy too so he’ll rub on every crevice of your silky walls, giving the best friction.

📄 𝐘𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠.𝐝𝐨𝐜

It makes sense that Miguel has a high sex drive especially with his pent up stress. He would take it out on you in bed after a long day and grin as you beg for more.

He wouldn’t initiate anything for a while until he’s properly settled with you and once he’s comfortable enough, he’ll pull you towards him in the most unexpected moments.

📄 𝐙𝐳𝐳.𝐝𝐨𝐜

Miguel’s suffering from insomnia is one of my head cannons, so don’t expect him to drift off immediately after sex anytime soon. He battles haunting nightmares of the multiverse collapsing one day and sometimes his brain replays the image of his daughter fading away in his arms over and over again.

But eventually they do begin to relent. Listening to your steady breathing as you sleep, nestling in his arms or on his chest really helps calm his nerves.

Cum.doc please 😭

[writerze]

author’s note: i haven’t posted anything on here in a longgg time. apologies if the story is all over the place i’m writing this at 2-4am !!

warnings: none, except for my corny ass writing

summary: you’re new at school and instantly gain miles’ attention.

part 2

e!42 miles morales x fem!black!reader

He admittedly had a small crush on you the first time he noticed you.

You were new to the school and you already stood out from the rest of the students. The way your looks and personality gained not only his attention, but as well as your new peers, was almost like a magnet.

Just his luck, the two of you shared a class together.

You sat a few seats to the side of him, unintentionally giving him the perfect view of your profile. Once the class started he tried paying attention, but it was stuff he already knew and had no interest in relearning.

He got distracted, deciding it was more interesting to look at you than whatever the teacher was saying. Miles didn’t notice that he was staring at you for that long, but you clearly noticed the heated gaze from someone nearby.

When you finally looked at him, he didn’t freeze like you expected him to do but only continued staring you down. You broke the eye contact first, leaning so that your braids covered the side of your face. If you could blush, you’d definitely be red right now.

Miles finally put his attention back on the teacher, but his mind only continued to go back to how pretty you looked.

⭐️

It’s been a few weeks since you started your new school and since you noticed Miles’ stare. Neither of you had made any direct contact, but in class or brief instances in the hallway the two of you always made some type of eye contact.

Your teacher’s voice discussing the new project they were assigning the class disrupts your thoughts. You were currently sitting in the class you shared with Miles’. Ever since you first caught him staring at you, you always made sure to look good in class or wherever at school you thought you’d see him. You were hoping that he would make the first move, but at the speed the two of you were going it was never going to happen.

“For the project you need to at least be a group of two or three. No more than that or your project will not count.”

The class echoes with different sounds of content or displeasure, people knowing exactly who their group would be or not having any idea.

You couldn’t help but glance at Miles, who just so happened to be looking at you.

“Begin searching for your partners. Move your desks together if needed.”

The dismissal of your teacher caused the students to rush to get up to find their desired partners.

“Hey! Y/N, do you want to work with me? This seems easy.”

“Y/N!! Work with me, you can come over my house to work on it!”

People you knew of in the class started coming up to you, asking if you’d want to work with them. Most of them being boys that were trying to get at you and a few being girls that thought you were able to get them more popularity.

You weren’t fully aware, but ever since you came to the school you were almost always the student’s main topic. People always had something to talk about when it came to you. It was either the fresh set of nails you had or the new braids you wore or the new pair of jordan’s you had on. One way or another, you were always talked about.

You quickly declined everyone’s offers. “I already have a partner! Maybe next time?” You quickly stood and walked towards Miles’ desk, who had been watching the whole ordeal.

“Hey..,” you took a moment to glance at him up and down. His fresh braids, cool fit, and of course his handsome features made him look so good. You were always confused on why you rarely see him talking with anyone.

“You don’t have a partner yet do you?”

His eyes stared into you, a passive look on his face, as he took his time to respond.

A slight smirk came across his face as he looked you over. “Nah, why? You tryna be mines?”

You couldn’t help but feel as if he had a double meaning behind his words.

A/N: I CAN WRITE WAY BETTER THAN THIS I PROMISE

[mooshs-crack-headcanons]

could I ask for hcs for how day to day life would change for erwin, hange, and levi's s/o after dealing with their notable injuries they get during the story? IE erwin's arm, hanji's eye, levi's scars, eye, and fingers ect? I hope this was clear enough I hope you have a nice day/night!

Sure thing and don't worry I understood you're request just fine, thank you. I hope you're having a nice current timezone anon :)

(Gender neutral reader)

Erwin Smith

Things are... mostly the same as the were before for the most part. Not right away though because of course all the stuff with Rod Reiss, Historia, the man hunt for Survey Corps heads, and the fact Erwin was quite literally sentenced to death not that long after losing it so things were of course very hectic to where there wasn't really a good adjustment period until the two month preparation period to reclaim Shingashima.

It's a shame really, it was his dominant hand too, now all his paperwork is signed with a slight messiness to it he isn't exactly a fan of. But he makes do, relearning and rewiring how his brain works to make up for the lost limb. But even if he doesn't say it out loud, you know more than anyone exactly how hard it is for him - even if to so many people he has so many different airs and appearances to keep.

"Oh it's just an arm, a small sacrifice for the greater good of Humanity. Many good, amazing, talented people have lost more. This is a minor scratch compared to that."

That's what he told Nile that night over dinner together with you and Marie too after Erwin's charges had been offically cleared off the records. Truth be told, none of you at that table bought it, even if he really did intentionally mean it - you three knew him, and it was subtle but with how he struggled to pick up and properly use the fork in his sole surviving hand spoke all it need to. It was a very human struggle - one he did everything to hide.

He can't shave his face by himself anymore, he has trouble putting his uniform on every morning, he needs to relearn how to use ODM gear in a modified way, he has to do an awkward version of the salute now, he struggles with how to maneuver and get himself clean in the shower for the longest until he comes up with a routine on how to do it one handed, he still has enemies so he has to rewire how he thinks of defending himself, he has to learn how to deal with this odd... phantom feeling of his missing arm still being there like in the stories he'd hear from injured soldiers. It's all hard, but he manages, braves through but he's very thankful to have you and so many close others at his side that are willing to help him through it.

Also misses holding your hand. During a meeting with Queen Historia, her Majesty speaking excitedly about her plans to help out orphans - specifically those from Underground, as Levi had made sure to suggest - that as the core members of the Survey Corps stood in audience, he couldn't help but to glance over at where you stood at one side of him, nodding supportively along to Historia's desires about letting the children have fun on her new acquired farm lands, that does he stare at you - at your hand more specifically, as you are standing at his side with the dangling green military coat sleeve. It's rude, he knows, not paying attention as the Queen speaks about her noble causes but he finds himself not being able to help it. For just a second - and maybe, probably, he's deluding this - but for a second he feels the empty sleeve move on it's own to graze at your hand as to grab it - immediately gaining your attention as you stare over at him with your gorgeous eyes that every time he looks at him he falls in love all over again, over and over and the way your head questioningly tilts as if to ask him if something was wrong does his throat turn dry but his lips slightly part until-

A rough kick comes subtly to his paralleled ankle at his other side, Levi. The Captain doesn't look at him, he just keeps his arms crossed over his chest and intently listens to Historia's plans, however, he quietly scolds under his breath: "Pay attention."

Right... he was being very rude. He shouldn't get lost up in silly stuff like this in such important professional times such as these. But... when you suddenly reach over and hold onto the sleeve just as it were his flesh hand only weeks prior, so sincerely and lovingly... he can't help but the dumb smile on his face.

Everything will be fine. He's still the same man. There'll be struggle, some more getting use to - afterall, it's only been a couple weeks if not a month. There's plenty of recovery time in the future, he knows it. After Shingashima, he decides, maybe then he'll take some time off - spend with you and truly attune himself with the lacking arm. And maybe... maybe if he practices a bit first with his still lack of balance... he can still properly get down on his knees and take out that heavy ring in his breast pocket and ask you that question that's been on his mind.

Hanji Zoë

Going to be perfectly honest, the missing eye is the least of Hanji's issues at the moment. It's still a struggle, yes, the now partial blindness that they have to now wear a patch over and it takes a couple weeks to properly get accumulated and not bumping into walls, doors, tables, and other stuff on accident. But it becomes something that's like second nature to the new Commander very quickly on.

Now... the sight isn't the issue. The mountain of other things that came with Shingashima is, both mental and physical.

The obvious is the new Commander position, taking over Erwin's role puts so much on their shoulders and not just that - having to put on this brave face for the only - ten, including themselves, Survey Corps members that survived that bloodbath. They're in charge, everyone's looking up to them them for advice, for orders, for their command. Meanwhile... Hanji hasn't even had proper time to grief for not just one but two of their best friends... Erwin. Moblit... that first night was the roughest, coming back home, to their now old office and practically broke down crying where you had to comfort them all night - they didn't sleep for the next four days straight. They stayed cooped in that office while everyone else was on leave to go properly recover and only let you attend to them. Hanji isn't... the same after that - and everyone notices but doesn't dare to speak on it. They aren't the quirky titan-obsessed quack anymore. They were the calculating 14th Commander of the Survey Corps, Hanji Zoë.

Hanji is also particularly deaf in their right ear now, even if they were - mostly - uninjured from the Colossal Titan nuke, the sound of the impact definitely damaged it a bit before they were tossed in deep the well by Moblit. They've never said the fact out loud to anybody, only you and Levi are aware of the fact, but they read lips more often than not now. So you make sure you always make it able to where they can properly read your lips when you speak to them, and if you can learn a bit of sign language that would also be very helpful.

Doesn't sleep as much as they used to. They say it's because they're too busy - Commander work and still helping out ironing out political matters and issues that still came with Historia's crowing as the new Queen of the Walls and the hectic readjustment period of getting Maria's old settlements rebuilt and ready for resettlement - but that's not just it. There's the nightmares now. Keeping them awake just to not wake them up screaming in the middle of the night and you have to loose sleep comforting them. They should be fine with it, they tell themselves, after all what they said back on that roof to Mikasa was true; they've seen hundreds of their comrades die - no actually, not a hundred... too many more than that to count. And each time they've been strong about it... distracting themselves in their research not to let themselves dwell on it too long. But now... no matter how hard they tried, nothing worked. Maybe it's because it was Erwin and Moblit, the closest two other people they had besides you and Levi. Or maybe it's because only ten fucking people out of the entire fucking Regiment survived that damn day.

And now that the truth is out there, what titans actually are, titan research isn't fun anymore. They could very easily drag one in a captured area and poke amd prod and maybe learn a little bit more on how the transformation process actually works - Connie Springer's mother would be a good example but just looking at that boy they can't bring themselves to even suggest it - but they don't. They just... sign off on papers all day. Try not to think about overseas that much. Not yet anyway.

Things are slightly better by the time you've made contact with the volunteers and the core Scouts had made their way to embark on Marley. Seeing new sights, new people, new inventions none of you could possibly even dream of was quite thrilling. Hanji has a great time, holding onto your hand and sporadically yapping on and on about this "car," or this "tele - phone," or this "controllable electricity." in the exact same manner and way they use to about titans - that wide shit eating smile that goes from ear to ear plastered to their face for the first time in years you love to see as you nod along and just listen and let them ask Onyankopon every possible question that comes to their head - the man having trouble even keeping up with them. It's nice while it last... but it's not too long until the 14th Commander comes back when reminded about why you're all here in the first place...

It's late at night one night, the night before you were all supposed to go back to Paradis does Hanji stare up at the ceiling of your shared room in the Azumabito astate. They have their eye patch off - feeling comfortable around you for you to see the mangled socket that normally rests underneath - as they lie back in bed and listen to you shuffle around to get into your night-wear to get ready to join them.

"I'm thinking..." They finally speak, you look back over your shoulder at them - sprawled out on messy sheets with only wrapped circuit of bandages around their chest to hide the shape. "...I'm thinking that Armin should be my successor. What you think?"

You tell them he's a smart kid, very talented at what he does but... given, past history... you express your feelings that it might be a lot to put on him, given the position of it's weight. Erwin's weight. Erwin's impact. Hanji's impact.

Yeah, probably true, they tell you. And they reminisce on how they felt when Erwin had dropped the sudden bombshell on them... God. They were turning more into him everyday... but you crawl over to the bed and start to kiss their face before the Commander can sulk in it. You love them, you tell them that every chance you get and it never fails to leave a gentle look in Hanji's remaining eye, their expression softening. They joke, saying how much you probably miss the old up-beat crazy Squad Leader Hanji... but you shake your head, hands so loving on their face as you tell them straight up you love them now just as much as you did back then - damaged and all.

Without hesitation they ask you to marry them.

Levi Ackerman

Hard. Very hard at first. He can only particularly see, for the first year or so his stitches itch to a very grading degree, he has only eight digits on his hands where using the left is... very difficult, especially with his unique ways of holding things, and he can't walk. Humanity's strongest - that ridiculous title... now look at him. He "entered" the Survey Corps ten years ago and now every single person around him then is dead - except you. During those first few days of the Rumbling he didn't really think about it - with all the shit going on he had other things to think about than have time to really... process. But here he is now, couple days after the "Battle of Heaven and Earth," as he's hearing people call it. Now in his time to heal does it really set in. And at first he doesn't take it... well.

Once he's well enough to be off bedrest and he's in that "damn chairwheels," you and Onyankopon manage to buy him (hard to come by given how... very much damaged the world still is post Rumbling) you're going to have to have to keep your eye on him because for the first couple weeks he will try to get up and walk around - only damaging his hurt leg more. He feels restricted in it, he wants to go where he damn well pleases - you tried crutches for a while but... he's actually too short for the ones you manged to find post Rumbling, so he's left to that chair. It just takes him time to get use to, that's all. Eventually though, months after the Crisis has been over, it's when you start taking him out places - steering him through the rebuilding cities of Marley, talking about God knows what, that he starts to come around... maybe it's not that bad, annoying, sure, but he feels a lot calmer now. Those kids - Gabi and Falco, they help too. Sometimes they drive him around but he isn't exactly the biggest fan when they clumsily knock him into shit though but they're cute kids, they remind him a lot of much younger versions of Isabel and Farlan, how they'd bicker all the time...

The two of you have a cabin together in Marley, a nice cozy cabin that with the help of Onyankopon - who smuggily calls himself a bit of 'builder' - is modified a bit so that it's more accessible for Levi to move around, plenty enough ofvplace to roam so he doesn't feel couped up like he expressed he didn't want when getting the place. It's nice though, Levi's never had a real house before - only somewhat exception being that dingy little apartment he and Kenny used to live in Underground and then he lived with Farlan and Isabel in it too before joining the Corps. Besides that it's always just been either a whorehouse, military base, or temporary spots he wouldn't even shit in. All shared spaces. Not something that was... his. Though of course he lives with you, you are his s/o but you're different. No, he lived... with you. You own this house together. It's his. It's yours. It's yours (plural).

He can't clean as properly as he use to, getting down on the ground and scrubbing top to bottom and every single crack in the room, of course he can't do that anymore so - and to make him feel better, feel good and comfortable in your own home together you do it, you keep the place always spotless. And he still wants to actively clean of course, the process has always been therapeutic for him, he just can't do it as thorough as he once did but he still will do what he can from the confines of sitting down while you do all the very high and very low lifting.

His senses are still sharp, even with his half blindness. But even still, you always make sure to stand on his good side and if your on the blind you make sure to audibly announce your presence even if he could probably still sense you - Ackerman biology boosting it by tenfold, after all - you do it because it's polite and he does appreciate that.

Mostly handles things with his good hand anyway but is in the habit of dropping things whenever it comes to his less-good one, there's only so much you can do with only three fingers (including thumb) on one hand without being issues. It takes awhile before he even let's you hold that hand again and when he does the first several times he always hesitates, but it all flutters away when you carefully and gently intertwine your fingers with his good ones and your pointer and middle finger lovingly folds over his numbs. Or when you kiss delicately at each of his knuckles on that hand... it's weirdly sweet, weirdly romantic, he thinks.

It's been three years now. Domestic bliss is something Levi never thought existed - or he he did, never, never ever in his thirty-seven year life would he ever think he'd get to live such a thing. The two of you sit in front of the lake off to the side of your cabin, sitting on a lunch-bench watching on as Gabi and Falco are completely red in the face, awkwardly and loudly confessing their feelings to one another in only that embarrassingly sweet way teenagers could. It's sweet... to watch on. You look over and see the small, subtle yet warm, soft smile on Levi's lips. Proud of them, those two dumb kids that's been helping the two of you out for years now. You laugh, causing him to look over at you.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing,"

The giggling in your chest dies down as you watch as the two kids untactfully bump their faces together in an attempted kiss but Falco jolts back holding his forehead in pain, and Gabi's face to turn an even darker red as she yells something at him.

"Do you think we're too old now to act like that?"

Grey eye rolls. "When have I ever acted like that?"

"Oh I can name quite the few times when we first first started dating-"

He suddenly grabs at your face with a: "Hush." before kissing you, the worn stitches on his lips against yours always feel nice. Then he leans back, staring at you with lingering thoughts before his eye flicks back over to the kids now sweetly in each other's arms.

"You know, I was going to ask you something today but those brats decided to go ahead and make it about themselves..." He says, no real malice in his voice, just teasing. But you tilt your head out of curiosity.

"Ask me what?"

He sits back on the bench and stares out onto the lake. His wheelchair is parked off to the side, it's in a bag. He could reach over and pluck it out now. It was something he actually picked out years ago... something he never thought he needed because he never expected to reach this point together with you but Hanji talked his ear off into buying it and Erwin gave him this... teasing encouraged look with that weird smile of his that he'll never forget for the rest of his life. And he's kept it with him, all the time, it's always been on him in some shape or form. Honestly he wasn't sure how you didn't manage to find it already.

He looks back over to you and you're still intently staring back over at him. Maybe. Maybe he still could now.

"Ask me what?"

If you like what you read please consider reblogging! It means the world for writers and artists!

[the-s1lly-corner]

TADC X Skater reader, except the reader is new and has no idea how to skate and keeps falling all the time,,,

TADC cast x skater!reader !

Wasnt sure if you meant roller skate or skate boarding so I might flip flop between those two I hope that's okay! I also have a similar request for a roller skater reader that I answered a few days ago, which I will link at the end of this post!

Written in mobile!

Side thing idk if it's because I have so many requests rn or what, but I SWEAR my inbox is bugging, I keep seeing requests I didnt notice before... maybe I just accidentally overlooked them? But I SWEAR it wasnt there before because I have looked at my current inbox a dozen times now over the past few days

Idk

CAINE:

Regardless of if ypure a roller skater or a skate boarder, hell or even an ice skater; if you're having trouble keeping your balance, Caine will hover above you and steady you. Hands on your shoulders, or hands under your arms... he may even grab your hands and lift them up while guiding you

I think its very sweet

Manifests a digital cushion for when you fall over

Regardless of if your body is part skate, or you just skate as a hobby, he will cheer you on the same

POMNI:

Honestly you've probably slipped backwards and fell onto her. She probably makes a squeaky toy noise when your weight slams into her... good news about this being the digital world, neither of you are going to be significantly hurt!

If you're wearing skates you guys probably stumble and struggle to get back up... it's a little sad to watch..

RAGATHA:

Insists that you wear a helmet and knee pads. Like sure you cant get permanently hurt, but it makes her feel better !

Helps you try to keep you steady by putting her hands on your sides or shoulders... nervously walks beside you while helping you.. pro awkwardly hovers her hands over you as well as you get more confident with it

JAX:

Either will actually help you or may he a menace... "endurance training" but its actually not endurance training that's just what he says when he throws a bunch of those tiny bouncing rubber balls into your path

"Expect the unexpected " type shit

I mean he would still help you up, I think

Not many thoughts here <\3

KINGER:

Balances you by standing behind you and holding your hands/wrists up... kinda looks like you two are dancing or something. Except you're on a skateboard while he walks you around the floor

Very sweet about it

Kind of gives off the energy of a guardian trying to teach their kid how to ride a bike

Its sweet I think

I would let kinger teach me how to ride a bike

I still dont know how to ride a bike

Hes so so encouraging, too

ZOOBLE:

Thinks that you skate is cool.... oh, you're new to it..? show them what you got!

Oh...

OOOOH...

Ooooh noooo... you just face planted into the floor

I think they would also try to guide you threw it. Probably the only one I can see who skated before, though in their past life in the real world

Maybe jax did but idk

I think they would join you, besides they kind of wish to see if they csn relearn how to do it with their new body

Yay bonding activities

Not many ideas for zooble either.. sobs

GANGLE:

Unique take for gangle, imagine not only do you struggle to keep steady while you're skating, imagine you struggle with stopping. I think you can see how this goes. Imagine you accidentally ram into her while trying to stop.. I mean look at it this way... her ribbons get stuck in your wheels so technically.. you do stop..! Pleade be gentle picking her out... I can only imagine how gnarly that feels

[jjunhui]

hiii lovelies! i just got back to being consistently active so it's crazy to me that i'm creating this post. i celebrated 500 followers shortly before i went on break; i am extremely honored that despite my being gone for such a long period of time, you all continued to support me. i am especially touched at how many of my mutuals remembered me and welcomed me back. i love you all so dearly and i truly cannot how thankful i am.

thank you to my beloved moots who have been so kind to me, many of whom who have helped me learn and improve, and all of whom have been tremendously welcoming ever since i got here -

@seokmins @bandzboy @jjaez @woozification @junranghae @seungkwan-s @jeongtokkie @shotaro-s @soonhoonsol @nunuboo @wnjunhui and a hell of a lot more (but i need time to relearn who everyone is LOL). even if i have not mentioned you, i appreciate you greatly.

to celebrate... my ask box is currently open for requests. you can request specific content, or you can make me choose between 2 things if you want me to suffer ;) send me an ask here, and have fun! p.s., i love you all dearly <3

[netherworldpost]

I NEED to know about this CMS / Project Management that actually works. But mermaids are also very good.

Combining your asks, and no worries. It works because the dryad is married to a mermaid ;)

So the big issue is I do... a lot of stuff.

Which is both why Netherworld Post hasn't launched yet, but is also why we haven't gone bankrupt even though we are "behind" schedule.

I'm putting "behind" in quotes because I am the singular wallet behind this + I am the one who set the schedule -- so it matters, but, also, it'll be fine

(probably)

It's a big traffic system. I historically name all of my tech after Scooby-Doo because delight is necessary.

Project 01: Do this, then this, and then this.

If Project 01 is delayed because Project 01 : Question 01 arrises, then move to Project 02.

Project 02 : Section 01 is painting a canvas in preparation for Project 02 : Section 05. Base prep time is estimated to be 1 hour including buffer.

Does today have 1 hour available? If so, do Project 02 : Section 01 and prepare Project 02 : Section 02 as 'on deck' for when it is ready.

Does today have 1 hour available? If not, reschedule Project 02 : Section 01 - 05. Move to Project 03 : Section 01, which should take 20 minutes. Unless Project 01 : Question 01 gets answered, then revert back to Project 01 to complete because from start to finish it should take 3 hours and has only one section.

etc.

On one hand it seems very intense. It's not. I don't work 24/7. I work very reasonable hours, but I'm also experimenting with a lot of things at once, so hobby time and work time blends a lot.

My comments about making a Super Mario Brothers chapbook of poetry are lighthearted but accurate (I don't know how to write poetry) (yet ;)

I used to paint a million years ago but haven't in years and years, so I'm relearning painting with acrylic on paper, acrylic on models, and watercolor on paper

Illustrations for products and comics

Writing comics, stories, web content, brushing up on current marketing trends, tinkering with programming for the systems in place...

Animating. That's a whole thing.

Dealing with printers and web hosts

-- and and and and and and and and --

Plus back office client work which is lots of research and writing and designing and production brokering. There are a lot of feedback loops -- "I found PRODUCTION THING for a client, I can use that to reduce costs for Netherworld Post"

and/or

"Hey client I'm writing a story about mermaids, you expressed interest in MERMAID CULTURE THING, here is a sales pitch for you to fund it. I get THIS PART and you get THAT PART."

When I was consulting, I called it the rocket ship fuel problem.

To launch a rocket into space, you need fuel -- the heavier the rocket, the more fuel you need -- but within the equation to figure out how much fuel you need, you also must accommodate the weight of the fuel you use to launch the rocket.

I should rename it "wind sail fan problem" for this post maybe.

I could scale up Netherworld Post's back office (client-facing)

This would allow me to more tightly focus on singular aspects -- maybe instead of re-learning how to animate + becoming acquainted with modern animation software, I hire freelancers to handle this.

HOWEVER

I would have to scale up our back office income enough to ensure the Post could invest in animation experiments and partnerships. It is a huge unknown if silly little commercials will help the Post grow or if it'll be a cash-sink (albeit a fun one). So that investment may be worth it! Or not!

So everything has to be really carefully balanced.

The Big Goals are to decrease dependency on any single social media platform (in progress)

to have a lot of fun (daily achievement)

to make a lot of stuff (I am, most of it is private, in time it'll be half-and-half public/private)

I am not built, as a person, to be an influencer. So all cash has to come from products sold and/or back office clients, which is fine, I'm not concerned about this.

What I am concerned about is we are watching Twitter or X or whatever it is called now implode. I'm not up on their latest style guide and I've grown repulsed by the program.

We're watching Automattic say "...hm."

We're watching Meta... be... Meta.

Various content curators who call themselves content creators say "this is mine now" and just outright steal content.

In an environment with rapidly rising interest rates (good, bad, and/or indifferent) making business-cash aggressively more expensive today than it was just a few years ago.

Which is going to add more and more pressure on social media networks to make a profit (or a larger profit)

The conceivable arc in the next 5+ years is launch the shop, continue making small experimental things to help it become known, and if cash rolls in, use that to make larger experimental things to help the shop become known.

It is a tight balance.

It is an amazing amount of fun.

If the shop launches and never makes a penny, it'll still be worth it.

Thank you. I recognize this is maybe more than you were looking for, but by your excitement, I think there is a 50% chance it's close to what you're looking for?

[ireneaesthetic]

“Wille tries to win back simon’s trust.”

Because that’s the whole point.

They really have to relearn how to know and trust each other in a way.

There’s obviously a backstory that brought them into their current situation and is the crucial part of it all, but what about the moment their eyes will finally meet after the christmas break? it’ll feel like a first time again somehow: awkward, anxious, emotionally overwhelming, it’s gonna be about "who will make the first move?", "who will be the ice breaker?”, “what are they gonna do now?”.

They’ll need to take opportunities and spend time together to talk things out, both of them will look for the answers to their questions, they’ll have to be on the same page and committed in building something, learn to trust and be trusted, make themselves vulnerable to love and be loved. All over again.

They will explore new deeper and hidden sides of one another, comprehend and accept them. It’ll be like getting to know each other again, falling in love for the first time again basically, in an even more intimate and connected way.

[vintagelacerosette]

Tag Game catch up ✨️

I was tagged to do these awesome tag games made by our shining star Macy @celestialmickey & was also tagged by these angel pies Evie @energievie Julissa @heymrspatel Jay @surviving-maybe Harvey @mikhailoisbaby Willow @ian-galagher Kaka @stocious Auds @auds-and-evens Michelle @michellemisfit Leah @whatwouldmickeydo Vey @look-i-love-u Julia @juliakayyy Ri @tanktopgallavich thank youuu 🥰

Name: Myn

Age: 26

Where in the world are you? Sydneeeyy

The meaning behind your URL: the mash up of pretty words & when i began this blog i had aspirations of being a pretty vintage type aesthetic blog lmao

Your second favourite color: Periwinkle

Any pets? My doggie Roxy

Favourite season: Currently, I'll say it's autumn but it varies bc I barely have any distinction with the season living in Australia lol so I'm happy as long as it's sunny & not blistering heat with a light breeze haha

Last thing you read:

Got fics in rotation at the moment haha but I'm rereading

Let the bodies to the talkin' by the magnificent Jane @captainjowl

My Nine Lover by the sensational Anna @annatrow

Last of a Dying Breed by the terrific @wildxwired

For a book I've started Be not Afraid of Love by Mimi Zhu that is a collection writings about the author's journey of relearning to love again after experiencing a violent relationship

Last song you listened to:

I'm getting familiar with the new FOB album 💕

What are you wearing right now? Black cardigan, brown pleated mini dress with pastel green low heels

A hobby of yours: Paper quilling

Your comfort show or movie: Currently Shadows and Bone (gotta get that Six of Crows spin off lmao)

and finally, what are you up to today? Dinner at restaurant I planned to catch up eith my old workmates bc I didn't get to do a farewell dinner when I left in December 🥰

TAG GAME: FANDOM EDITION 💖

Your Name: Myn

Your Age: XXVI

Your First Fandom(s): I think Violet x Tate from American Horror Story

Your Current Fandom(s): Gallavich & Wesper (my book babies got adapted to tv y'all 🤧💕)

How did you first get into fandom? I think i got i more into the fandom culture in 2012 but i did take a break for like maybe 3 years bc I had no idea how the site worked or how to make friends haha. So i missed many of the iconic tumblr moments.

How long have you been engaging with fandom spaces? I remember reading animr fanfic since year six or year 7 so in 2008/2009 & I joined tumblr in 2012 as a more passive participant spam reblogging bc I had no idea how the site worked at first lol. Then I became a more active participant in the gallavich fandom in 2022 when I decided to post my first gallacrafts in feb 🥰

How often do you read fanfics? Every single day & every spare hour I can spare

Top 3 characters from your current fandom(s):

Mickey my beloved Milkovich, Ian sweetface Gallagher & Sandy darling Milkovich

Wylan Van Sunshine, Jesper hotshooter Fahey & Kazzle Dazzle Brekker

Have you ever written a fic for a fandom? if so, shout it out! Not yet, but I oh so plan to I got wips summaries coming out the wahzoo

Have you ever drawn fanart for a fandom? if so, shout it out! Yess i am so happy to have made some fanart for our lovely Macy's fanfic Your Message Has Been Received, Gallavich × Good Omens fanart for Gallacrafts & other art found in the tag #Myn's art

Share a personal headcanon that you feel very strongly about:

Ian gets the fucking Monica boobs tattoo fixed omfg it'll be a touching tribute to her not whatever the fuck that was. Also Mick gets Ian's name fixed too. They could do it together & then get tattoos that symbolise each other on their bods

You’re trying to convince a friend to get into your current fandom(s) with you. what episode, clip, or scene are you showing them? Ohh CLUB KISS CLUB KISS CLUB KISS

Shadow and Bone

Under carriage scene! Recognised his man by being on top of him. The muscles memory of it all 😏

And finally, what does fandom mean to you? Fandom gave me back my creative passion back. Something I thought I had lost & desperate wanted back but had no idea how, but by finding all of you beautiful, amazingly sweet & brilliant minds that came together out of the love our soft & sensitive husbands I found a safe place & a home where I can share what I create which is my love. So thank you all forever for being in my life 🥹

Also this Picrew too & this is basically my outfit for dinner just a lighter brown dress with plaid & minus the frog hat sadly 😔🐸

I'll tag these dearhearts if they wanna play @scarcrosseduntouched @andthatisnotfake @adakechi @skies-below @ lingy910y @imikhailotakeyouian @babygirlmickey @too-schoolforcool @gardenerian @creepkinginc @demontargaryen @chicanomick @suzy-queued @tomorrowillmissyou @ intotheblindinglight @lalazeewrites @tellmegoodbye @jomilky @darthvaders-wife @flamingbluepanda @crossmydna @depressedstressedlemonzest @gallavichgeek @gallavichsbitch @shameless-notashamed @callivich @sickness-health-all-that-shit @bravemikhailo @7x10mickey @sleepyfacetoughguy @suchagallabitch @iansw0rld @ deathclassic @grabmyboner @y0itsbri @grumpymickmilk

[dolloshub]

Everything is as it should be-OS & Echo-

This doll isn’t going anywhere- long overdue updates within!

And she’s back! This doll is still here and still making progress! It’s apologies for such an extended delay, everything is okay but it’s been hard few months medically speaking.

As those that have been following know, the body and brain that this doll inherited came with many many health issues. This not wanting to spend the last years of their life In a hyper aware and intense physical and psychological trauma state was a primary driving force behind this journey.

Just because the journey of a girl to programmable doll was started does not mean that it’s health issues vanished. These health issues are, as of now the biggest barrier to being able to be programmed to the extent that both doll and Owner would like.

To remove this barrier, doll needs to simplify the dozen or so conditions, and prevent them for interacting too much with one another. Getting to the point where “sure there’s multiple health conditions, but they are straight forward enough that doll doesn’t have to rely on its ability to advocate is necessary for doll to simplify its mind and existence. This has been one of the top goals for 2022 and 2023, and is the reason for doll’s recent absence abs the subject of the rest of this post.

So what’s been happening with doll? Let’s discuss!

Over the past year or so doll has had multiple eye surgeries, has had to relearn how to see, how to perceive the world, and get used to this new feature that it guesses, comes installed by default, called depth perception‽ Who knew 3D was a thing?

This brain that doll’s software runs on also came with drug resistant epilepsy, one could say the cpu was defective on arrival. It started having breakthrough seizures again late last year, that continued to get worse.

At this point, the body and brain have broken through over a dozen different seizure meds, which means there is a 99.99999% that it will continue to break through any seizure medication in the future.

Good dolls of course are low maintenance, reliable, and don’t have their programming corrupted by unpredictable electrical activity across it’s wiring. So obviously, a good doll aspires to such a state- after all its purpose is to make Owner’s life better, less stressful.

This unfortunately has not been the case over the past year, and it’s programming has become increasingly glitchy, causing electrical storms nearly everyday- making additional programming both difficult and unpredictable, and making doll increasingly erratic and difficult to maintain.

For this reason it has started the work to determine if this brain is a good surgical candidate. For those of you that have read doll’s previous journal entry, the post on ptsd triggers- ghosts in the shell, epilepsy and seizure activity is the biggest as it connects to almost every health issue doll has, and is responsible for the most of doll’s current health issues.

For the sake of clarity, this doll’s health issues are very much like a Russian Nesting DollI.

If epilepsy is a result from cerebral palsy and the brain damage it caused, all the other health issues are a result of epilepsy. These include many many unusual seizure presentations, and long term physical and neurological damage, including additional scarring of the brain, and six or so rare, complex conditions ranging from everything from not being able to produce tears, to not being able to regulate body temperature, excess adrenaline, and the inability to maintain normal blood pressure, heart rate, electrolytes, and even stand up without fainting- among others.

All of these have been caused and made worse by years of hard to diagnose and control epilepsy. Including extended periods, sometimes years of daily seizures, often in the 15-20/day.

These past couple of months were mostly spent in preparation of and then a “visit” to an epilepsy monitoring unit, where seizure activity was intentionally provoked.

This visit was a one week stay during which seizure medications were stopped cold turkey, and 30 hours later this doll’s brain was in a full on electrical storm- with 30+ seizures recorded by eeg, and countless others deeper within the brain where the eeg couldn’t detect, most of them very severe, and the worst of them being clustered with 72 hours.

Due to the severity, even trained neurologists had great difficulty on getting the seizures back under control, after failed attempts, even with rescue meds given via IV and with increasing risk of additional long term permanent brain damage looming something else has to be done.

This doll suggested it go into a state of ketosis, the only treatment that has been able to control seizures nearly completely.- but rarely used for seizure control in adults.

Fun fact: This doll helped create the adult ketogenic protocol for epilepsy control a few years back. One of the big reasons it still exists. Now it’s thinking of that doctor strange timeline reference again.



Okay, back on point Echo- So, the result of the seizures getting that out of hand that quickly, and not even two kitchen sinks being tossed in for good measure helping calm the electrical storm that is the brain between doll’s ears was…

instead of it taking 1-24 hours to get the seizures under control, it took nearly four days, and new medications.

The toll on doll’s brain also affected its vision, central/autonomic system. Up until last Friday this doll was seeing double vision, couldn’t stand up without nearly fainting and was on the edge of being non-functional.

Fortunately doll has stabilized, and is continuing towards baseline, likely another 3-4 weeks out. Due to all the changes, and the additional knowledge that doll’s brain has been seizing nearly every day for at least a year we are not sure what it’s new baseline will be.

Now, OS is pretty sure that anyone who’s made it this far is wondering.. alright that’s a lot, so how the Hell is “Everything is as it should be‽”

The shortest answer is that the hospital stay was a treasure trove of information. We’ve been able to determine cause/effect that seizures are both responsible for causing the start of most conditions downstream, and have caused those issues to continuously be flared up anytime it has a seizure. We’ve also been able to determine that is extremely likely the origination point of all seizure activity is within the scar tissue from the cerebral palsy (see didn’t doll tell you girls are better with broken brains?) This means that the majority of its erratic behavior and going off script, fluctuating response to programming, erratic physical issues fluctuating, and the increasing nature of ptsd transportations to other pages has been if not caused by, then at the very was least made worse and more frequent by ongoing daily seizure activity, including while in sleep mode.

This in turn means that with the new seizure medication, 20-40x more effective than the one it was on means that it’s new baseline is likely to be much much more stable, low maintenance, and more predictable in terms of programming and progress.

It also means that it’s emotional regulations and all of those issues that keep getting flared up downstream from seizure activity are very likely to calm waaaay down.

Although it’s unlikely that any of those conditions doll’s body has acquired will ever go away, it is very hopeful that this new medication will allow increased functionality and prevent additional conditions to be acquired, and should keep doll steady until a permanent solution can be found in the next year.

Doll and Owner are planning on using this time to continue down the very long path of testing for epilepsy surgery and hopefully surgery, removing this variable. Of course in the meantime having stable wiring and electrical activity will allow continued programming, hopefully even more effective than before.

As time goes by, as it tends to have a habit of doing, especially in the lack of any infinity stones close by this doll is likely to continue to have health impact it’s ability to post.

As Owner has written about previously, doll’s mental functions are being affected, and not just by seizure activity, primarily through its programming. It’s ability to write up something this complex is a testament to previous programming safeties ensuring functionality in dangerous situations.

For the immediate future, this ability will be allowed under the safety chest protocols.

Additional updates as to how doll and Owner are addressing the necessity of “peak performance” and high functionality while still making programming progress within the apps on short and long term goals will be upcoming in a Doll OS app design update post.

In the meantime this doll wants to thank everyone who reached out to check on doll, the past month has been intense for both doll and Owner. Even if doll hasn’t responded, it is so grateful for everyone’s support.

The ability to share this journey is such gift, so thank you my friend, for coming with us on this adventure of a lifetime, of an existence.

Programming doll at least doesn’t involve brain surgery- phew!

…oh wait, never mind..Never Mind

-Doll- OS & Echo

[whumpering-heights]

Happy Whumpmas (•∇•。) 🎅🎄🎁🦌 🍪 🥛!!! You have just been snowballed by a secret whumper. Help to keep the snowball fight going by anonymously sending this to five other whumpers with a whump-related question of your choice: What is your character(s)' biggest fear? How would they react if it came true?

thank you for snowballing me! What a cool question too, let me think...

So for Villain, one could argue his biggest fear already came true: the loss of his intelligence/cognitive ability, and with it his sense of self-worth and identity. It didn't even occur to him he could lose it, before Hero. (At least, not at his age, and he didn't expect to live long enough for dementia to be a problem.) The fear really only appeared once he started his cognitive decline. At this point, he's "accepted" it. Put in quotes because really, he's simply given up on recovering what he lost. He feels trapped in his head, but knows there's nothing he can do.

Which leads me into his current biggest fear: (further) loss of autonomy. His indepence was another cornerstone of his identity. Having to sacrifice it during capture didn't really trigger this fear fully (he was too busy fearing for his life and mind). But now, he's "free", theoretically able to do what he wants. And yet, he has to rely on Hench and Vigilante for everything. The woman he considers like an unofficial daughter, and his former advisary, both people he would never accept help from, if he had the liberty to. And yet, he's dependant on them, from food and money to help getting dressed and relearning how to walk. (Not even mentioning the mental support.) His current biggest fear is he'll be unable to make any true decisions for himself, even when he's recovered.

Vigilante's biggest fear is that he's not a good person. Oh sure, he knows he does good things! And he's proud of the ways he's changed. But there's a worry that those don't outweigh the bad he's done. He has a case of moral imposter syndrome. Whenever he gets a confirmation of that (i.e being compared to Hero in any way), it adds another scoop to the pile of guilt, and he'll close himself off further to avoid being "found out".

Sidekick has a very similar fear of turning into Hero. But I don't think it's his biggest, currently. It's a big one for sure, and it'll haunt him for a very long time, but I think at the moment, he's more scared that it'll all be for nothing. His abuse has to mean something: at first, he rationalized it as making him stronger. Now, he just wants to grit his teeth and bear it until he can replace Hero and be better than him. So if he were to "give up" (aka leave his abusive home), or die young/not be able to become a hero/ect, it would all just be meaningless violence and abuse. If that were to happen... he'd be completley lost, and consider his life over before it really began.

Hench was very cagey about her biggest fear (for a while, the closest i could think of was "public speaking"), but I've narrowed it down to "rejection/dissaproval". The higher she thinks of someone, the harder their opinion of her will matter. She doesn't care what the city thinks of her actions, as she likes Villain better than anyone. So as long as he approves of her, she's content. Vigilante is second on the "people that matter" list for her, but he doesn't come close to Villain. If Villain were to reject her... Oof. I think she'd pick up very bad coping mechanisms in an attempt to ease that pain, and I highly doubt she'll ever love anyone like she did Villain.

And finally, Hero. His biggest fear is very plain: he's scared of not being on top. He needs the external validation: the adoration, his status, his control over others. If any of those things are threatened, he lashes out to silence whatever caused it. In his mind, there's the worthy few at the top, and the worthless lot at the bottom. And he doesn't want to lose his place in that hierarcy. If that were to happen, he'll lose what little self control and subtlety he has, and claw his way back up no matter the cost.

[solarisgod]

micah is most grateful for lina who had offered to assist them, guiding their sore and trembling body over to where they can rest well. lina's presence is highly soothing to them that they believe they will get better much sooner. to be a saint is to meet bare recovery nor serenity ( to be an antigod is to be painfully [un]real ━━ ). they smile at @viburni, kind, their starry eyes all bright of endless warm gratitude.

❝ thank you again so much, miss, ❞ micah gently says, giving her a light squeeze of hands. from the great comfort in this innocent gesture, they giggle, even despite the pain they feel somewhere deep within them. ❝ you know, i can't remember the last time i would just ... walk, ❞ to travel with the only reasons of loving and appreciating ━━ live. training and miracle making are what that they can do most nowadays.

yet, the things they do from them ━━ becoming and being a saint : protecting the mundane and miraculous and more, while keeping this strange and wonderful universe free of the godtellers' wild wicked works, micah is content enough in giving up some self - tranquility if it means that everyone else can have their complete peace once more in the end.

then, micah will relearn how to exist softly.

❝ despite my current state, this has been so nice !! ❞ they gesture at the space between them as the pair continues moving in the dying evening, ❝ when i get better, i'd love to have more walks with you !! you seem like a lovely lady ... i'm grateful we could meet !! ❞ their smile widens, ❝ i'm micah, by the way, it's wonderful to meet cha !! ❞

[forfoxessake]

I posted 166 times in 2022

129 posts created (78%)

37 posts reblogged (22%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@oldstuffnewstuff

@girlgerard

@mcrbois

@teachmetokill

@iero

I tagged 164 of my posts in 2022

Only 1% of my posts had no tags

#100 movies challenge - 110 posts

#movies seen in 2022 - 110 posts

#movie review - 89 posts

#100 movies - 22 posts

#oscar nominee 2022 - 18 posts

#review - 16 posts

#gerard way - 15 posts

#my chemical romance - 15 posts

#movies seen in 2021 - 7 posts

#documentary - 7 posts

Longest Tag: 55 characters

#reasons why gerard would make a great newsletter writer

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

[02] Harry Potter 20th Anniversary: Return to Hogwarts

Directed by Eran Creevy, Giorgio Testi,  Joe Pearlman

 As a fan, I absolutely loved this. Of course, there wasn't going to be anything new, it was not the point. It was a time to remember what they experienced throughout those years and it's wonderful to be able to look back and see things from a distance. Unfortunately, due to covid this probably was smaller than could have been but not any less enjoyable.

14 notes - Posted January 10, 2022

#4

[45] Tom At The Farm (2013)

Directed by Xavier Dolan 

 The thing about this movie is that you are constantly waiting for something horrible to happen. The tension is palpable. It's sexually charged, it's angry and mad and without a reason. Tom is at the farm and he can't get out of it.

18 notes - Posted April 12, 2022

#3

[41] Belfast (2021)

Directed by Kenneth Branagh 

 Remembering your own past is a thing that seems to be popular with directors currently. I like this trend, and I like that Branagh did it slightly differently. He goes further back and tries to remember something from his childhood that at the time he wasn't fully able to understand, and he doesn't try to make it make sense to us. It still feels like living in his memories, a bit confusing, sometimes fantastical, often a bit scary. Grown-ups can be magical and so big, almost unreal characters. It's an honest trip down memory lane, one where you don't ask your family to explain things how they really were.

20 notes - Posted April 7, 2022

#2

[14] Pleasantville (1998)

Directed by Gary Ross 

This was one of the movies I always stopped everything I was doing and watched whenever it was on tv after school. I wasn’t old enough to understand what it was talking about or the more complex themes but I still enjoyed it a lot.

I was surprised to still find enjoyment and beauty here, it’s a very original work, filled with practical effects and what is a simple plot at first but it gets more and more exquisite when those tv characters start to feel like real people and you can’t stop the changes. We can’t go back to seeing the world in black and white, pleasant.

24 notes - Posted January 24, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

You know what.

I truly am an #MCR5 believer but I don't think it's happening on #MCRLA5 - specially now that the main buck of the tour is almost officially over. No more tour buses and all.

This #Return tour has been about them reconnecting with My Chemical Romance, not just us, but them relearning nearly all of their songs, giving them new arrangements, new lyrics, it means something different now.

They choose to give us a different set list every single night, it’s incredible rare and precious what they have done, it show us that they are truly committed, it’s far beyond a “let’s make money off people’s memories tour”. They didn’t need to do that to have a successful tour and yet they choose to - even now so close to the end - add songs that they haven’t played yet and even a song they have never played live before.

It’s watching them become a band again, and I really think they needed to learn how to be that again, to learn all of their songs, revisit who they were, to find out who they want My Chemical Romance to be from now on.

Whoever that is going work out it’s up to them, maybe it won’t be as intense as they were before (up until BP), but it will special.

24 notes - Posted October 15, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[marr-ble]

thank you for tagging <3 @silverpaintedstars!

posted 116 times in 2022

64 posts created (55%)

52 posts reblogged (45%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@authorofemotion

@silverpaintedstars

@star-lemonade

@keikuns

I tagged 39 of my posts in 2022

#marrbles - 14 posts

#picrew - 11 posts

#picrew a day keeps sadness away - 7 posts

#writing - 6 posts

#marrwrites - 5 posts

#smurfs - 2 posts

#marr game snippets - 2 posts

#i dun wanna grow up - 1 post

#anotherdayanotherpicrew - 1 post

#choice - 1 post

Longest Tag: 131 characters

#no like the problem is that i want to do a lot of thing but sleeping is a huge flirt and i keep falling for its dirty little tricks

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

ARGHHHHHH CUTE OVERLOAD TOO MUCH

LINK HERE

2 notes - Posted November 10, 2022

#4

*walks into the room and flops down next to you* hi friend!!! this is your daily reminder to do some stretches, eat something if you haven’t in a while, and go drink a glass of water!! love youu <333

OOF HOW DID YOU KNOW I WAS GULPING DOWN PEPSI JGDLFFDGKUL

okiee will do! I do really need those stretches too <3

2 notes - Posted January 5, 2022

#3

Mental Health Checkpoint!!

Hello beloved <333 It’s been a long week, so how about we take a deep breath and take a minute to reset and come back to ourselves?

- What is something you’ve done recently that you’re proud of or feel accomplished over?

- What’s a way you can plan to be extra kind to yourself today?

- Was there anything that happened this week that was stressful or upsetting that you need to process through?

- Have you had enough water today? (hint: the answer is no. drink some water and get something to eat!!)

- Challenge: tell someone that you love them :))

*hugs you for entirely too long* You’re doing so great and I’m so proud of you!!! Love you!!!!! <3333

- What is something you’ve done recently that you’re proud of or feel accomplished over?

Clearing the pantry/store. Tho its just 1/8 of the actual nightmare condition, its a start &lt;3

- What’s a way you can plan to be extra kind to yourself today?

To try and sleep properly

- Was there anything that happened this week that was stressful or upsetting that you need to process through?

Tbh, my entire being. I've been super pessimistic lately, and listing out my bad traits on a daily basis and questioning why the heck am I still alive and wanting to just not wake up.

- Challenge: tell someone that you love them :))

tough one t_t. Currently in a I hate everyone episode ahacsvsvshs but I'm relearning to be kind

oooh and yes I had water today! Had a ton of mango juice too XD

3 notes - Posted March 20, 2022

#2

Making my smurfs work the graveyard shift

3 notes - Posted November 14, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

haven't made a picrew for the longest time everrr.

pov: when you just remembered that you have 2 papers to take today instead of one

19 notes - Posted September 4, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[ghostofpolaris]

RP Ad 11/20/2023 📰

[UPDATE 11/23/23: If I do not hear back from you in a week, I will assume you have ghosted and will dissolve any RPs we have. Please understand, it is incredibly disheartening hearing nothing back after weeks at a time. I understand if you have IRL stuff going on, but please give notice at the very least. I think it is only polite.] Howdy everyone! My name is Ghost and once again I am here with an updated RP ad for this account (gosh time flies and so much has changed! <3). I am hoping to find a couple different RPs with someone 21+ (as an adult I just don't think it is comfortable for me to try and RP with a minor sorry) since stuff have slowed down and I have different interests I hope to explore. I won't many to just keep things easier on myself so I hope to get at least 2 RPs going with some lovely people. Just to let everyone know, I do not RP on Tumblr anymore and stick to Discord because I don't know how to really RP on Tumblr anymore (I did at one point but stuff has changed so much I can't wrap my head around it, but I am happy to relearn if someone is willing to pass on advice!). If anyone is interested (after reading this please), please DM me and we can talk more. :D NOTE: Please adhere to any RP Guidelines/Rules I may have! It will help make things smoother for everyone. <3

Just a little bit of info about me: I am 27 years old, Genderfluid (currently using They/She pronouns), and am in the EST time zone. My style of RP is Third-Person POV and I usually range from Semi-literate to Novella depending on what inspiration I have but do not feel you ever have to try and match me! My main request is please just keep the storyline going and no one-liners. I have been RPing since 2008 (started on YouTube of all places) and I like to try and befriend the people I RP with. I have RP'ed with all sorts of fandoms from Genshin Impact to Twisted Wonderland and even Assassin's Creed, but currently I am looking for RP's based more in the Marvel Universe as Marvel seems to really capitvate my attention right now. Also wanted to add: I do doubles and am totally happy to give it a go to RP as a character you may want. It will take some research, but I am happy to do the best I can. So if you are wanting something even like OCxOC or even OCxCanon I am happy to double up and give anything a whirl. I just hope that before you contact me, that I do tend to incorporate a ton of detail and have lots of details I want to add so if this is not okay, please feel free to not answer this ad.

Below are ideas I hope to explore: 1.) I am hoping to find someone who may be able to RP as Peter Parker but more specifically, the one from Marvel's Spider-Man game from 2018 (I have played the Miles Morales game and have yet to play Spider-Man 2 but plan on doing so soon. :) ) against a Spider-person OC of mine. I have a whole storyline behind this idea so please bear in mind there may be lots of stuff I may send. Even if it is mainly set in the Spiderverse movies too, I am also down to find some adventure there too. 2.) This is the idea I hope to find the most, but especially after Season 2 of the Loki show ending, I was hoping to find someone who can RP as Loki with my OC. To make it short and sweet, I had the idea of my OC making a Pact with Loki (in another Universe) and became his Avatar after their world is destroyed. Eventually, they get separated but I would love to see the dynamic of another Loki with my OC and what could blossom from it whether it is a friendship or even romance.

3.) This would be cool if someone was interested, but I would love to find someone who could RP as Stephen Strange with an OC of mine (technically an AU of them but no worries) who essentially is just King Arthur reawoken in the modern world and Stephen essentially has to watch them and make sure they won't be a threat. Where myth and legend get it wrong, is King Arthur was actually a woman named Artinia Pendragon (I totally did not rip off Fate/Stay Night shhh).

Other than that, I am also up for any ideas people have for within the Marvel-verse! Feel free to DM me if interested and if we are a good match, I don't mind taking stuff to Discord. :D I hope to hear from you soon and thank you for reading everything. Let's have a bite of adventure together!

[clowningismyboyfriend]

Ladies and gentlemen, please allow me to interrupt your current/relevant and recent social media doom scrolls to share something wholesome and that I will forever treasure thanks to and about @taylorswift

Hi!

My goodness! This isn’t the normal for me but why not. I figure the chances of a #Taylurking would be higher here!

Ok so here’s a straight forward, insightful and personal look into my world and how it is travelling with the post below that I recently shared in the Facebook Fan Group “Taylor Swifts Vault” Thanks to this page I discovered (thankfully in time to get some tickets!!) that my local cinema will be playing the Eras tour movie and after locking down tickets, I was beyond stoked and have had the best day celebrating and singing Taylor ALL DAY. Now look, this is the usual for me to sing all the things all of the times, but it was next level for the family, trust me.

I thought it was only being shown in Brisbane and was sorta kinda hurt all over again after not being able to get tickets. After making peace with not getting tickets, I buried any hard feels by creating this very blog page you find yourself eyeballing!

I’d been gently guiding my niece (I am her full time guardian) and stepdaughter, also 12, into Swiftie Territory. I mean, we would already regularly bust out to a song together; I am always oversharing facts and insights into whatever song might be playing or giving Swiftstory Lessons on the crucial moments in Taylor’s life and what impact they might have had, BUT most importantly I am forever establishing Taylor as a perfect role model for them by talking about/reminding them of all the amazing acts of kindness she does, her humble nature and generous bonuses to staff and the wonderful ways she shows up for her fans in so many ways.

I have been know to correlate lyrics and thematic aspects of Taylor’s songs when we are having the big “life” talks; you know, relationship talks and whatever- There is always something that can be tied to a TS song, particularly with 12 year old girls who have huge amounts of feelings and a tendency to be dramatic.

I was SO happy they agreed to be my dates on Friday the 13th October at 6pm AEST at Reading Cinemas, Harbourtown, Gold Coast/Queensland Australia (phew what a mouthful lol. Posted this specific info in the hopes of catching the attention of any other fellow local Swifites!)

But when we started excitedly discussing and began whipping up our friendship bracelets and planning our outfits together (..or “fits” as my niece calls it) I had to hold back from crying happy, deep realisation in the in the moment style of tears.

Anyone with 12 year old girls knows how difficult it can be navigating this period of life in general; the attitudes, moodiness and rapid increase in laziness is enough with just the one, but here I am with TWOz And although I love them like my own and treat ALL the kids equally (there’s 4 other boys too,step sons a nephews and a biological Threenager turddler) - It can be so hard, often at times THAT much harder not actually being their Mum.

Why is it that much harder? When they were younger, the dynamics were strictly that of parental figure and child and rules that were more firmer given their ages.

Now, as they get older and start to outgrow previous rules and are given slightly more leeway, they sometimes get more resistant, stubborn and more argumentative as they relearn different and new boundaries.

.. Ladies and gentleman I present to you The Tween Era. Colour Scheme identifiers: Bleak and tonal Thundercloud Grey, with extremely rare flecks of crystal skies blue and cheeky dashes of vibrant colour 😅

.. So anyway I definitely digressed a little bit!

What I am trying to convey is how today I discovered an extra love and appreciation for Taylor Swift that I didn’t consider as a possibility- that being an unexpected but highly enjoyable new bond between my girls and I.

@taylorswift you might not see this, but just knowing that the good intentions of my appreciation will come back to you in the form of positive karma is enough for me:

The impact of your incredibly gifted artistry to date and the resulting, pivotal decision in YOUR world @taylornation to release The Eras Tour to cinemas worldwide has flowed into MY world in the most amazing way…

My niece, stepdaughter and I have successfully managed to find a rare, balancing foundation that I feel will underpin the strength and continuity of so much more love to come. This seemingly flippant bond over you will smoothly carry us through the predicted and potentially rocky hard years to come as they enter the teenager years and beyond.

The simple act of showing our support to you will deepen our connection and positive growth for us for years to come. The wonders it’s worked on our communication already is a priceless gift I’ll always treasure xx

Normally I sign off my posts with the whole swirly font

“until then..” *insert random Taylor lyric alluding to or contextualised into a farewell* resume swirly fancy big font xx Dani.

But this is a bonus round post so here are some bonus photos!

Recent pic of me and my beautiful girls.. again, yes I know they aren’t mine by blood but they are mine in heart and the heart is what that keeps everything flowing and continually going.. I couldn’t think of a better analogy to represent me.

(Yes I was in my Red era that day with the hat/white tee and shirts combo, but the extra layer of “Red” that you didn’t see was how I had “22” blasting through a speaker under the pram, me singing at the top of my lungs as I took 5 kids for a walk up to the local Broadwater to cool off and vibe with the creation of some truly magical, summer beach memories ✨🏝️

Bonus pic 1. Circa being done with “22” 🤪 ( The fella in the purple shirt isn’t mine but he and his sister are practically part of the furniture anyway)

Bonus pic 2. My step kids, niece and nephew and the boss of them all, the tiny, tyrannical, trex-sounding, tantrum throwing , threenager turddler 😂 He’s the problem, it’s him! Everybody agrees everybody agreeeess.. 😜

[jtprojects]

Game Development with JavaScript

Blog Post 1 - INTP-362

So recently, I started learning JavaScript focusing on the game development side of it instead of just the regular website functionality stuff.

I'm going off of the assumption that you are from my class who has learned JavaScript in terms of website development before (if you aren't then hello!), I'm also gonna assume that you already know how to code and the basics of JS.

So game development using JavaScript isn't anything new, having been used in many beloved games such as Bejeweled, Pac-Man, Tetris, Agar.io, and so on and as game development has always been something that I've always wanted to learn, I figured why don't I try to make my own? "But why JS?" you may ask. Well here's the true answer, as cool as it would be to learn game dev in C or C++, those are simply just languages I'd rather learn on my own time without the pressure of meeting certain deadlines or having due dates for deliverables for while learning whereas I already am familiar with JS and it'll be easier for me to produce product that way :P (as this entire thing is currently kinda just for school and one of my subjects).

I started my journey learning JS game dev on a site called SoloLearn (a website that's whole purpose is to allow people to learn and practice coding). For the first couple weeks, the lessons were purely just recap of things I had already known (html, css, basic web dev stuff) and given the limited amount of lives that would be taken away if you answered the quiz questions wrong (which was embarrassingly more often than I'd like to admit. Turns out the recap was definitely needed lmAO) I only recently actually started getting into the new content.

From my limited time actually getting into the game dev side of JS, there's definitely a lot more math to be done. So far in our courses, I've found that we haven't really needed to get deep inside complex math (I'm talking trig and things to do with radians and pi and vexes and shapes bc let's be honest, that stuff is harder than calc or algebra I wiSH I could be doing calc or algebra instead of using pi bro) but I've found that JS game dev heavily relies on these aspects. Now of course, you don't need to manually do every single calculation to figure out every shape (circles make themselves essentially if you know what you're doing) but looking at all these numbers and tryna remember which axis is the x and which is the y after 2 years of not touching that pains me. I had to relearn how to convert angles into radians I'm in pain. But other than circles, the math was still necessary, especially given the short quiz questions that were handed out to me in which they gave us the x and y dimensions of the canvas (which is where all the cool shapes and stuff shows up) and we had to do math to figure out where a shape was supposed to be placed if we wanted it in a certain space on the canvas like the centre. While you may be thinking "Hey OP, that's genuinely not too bad, you simply divide the canvas x and y in half!" yeah, sure for circles but for rectangles/squares, it's a tad more difficult (or a lot more difficult if you have monke brain like me). In order to place a rectangle in the middle of the canvas, not only must you find the middle of the canvas, you must also take the width of the rectangle divided in 2 and then subtract that from the width of the canvas divided by 2 and then do the same for the length of the rectangle and canvas. Now while that may not be too bad, you must remember that my brain has the memory of chimpanzees (who apparently have the worst memory? Just like me fr) and I simply cannot remember that many numbers while still processing future math problems because I simply currently don't have the ability to (my memory is being reserved specifically by random minecraft and science facts).

Now that I've finished malding over the pain of numbers, onto what's kinda the neater part of game dev: the animating. I cannot explain to you the pain I went through when testing out different things. Fortunately, SoloLearn provides examples that you can run on the website while learning but despite the example being directly in front of me, I still manage to make mistakes when adding features to practice my understanding. Take this code for example:

A nice loading bar-like animation! For the longest time, I sat there wondering as to why when changing the value to blue, a portion of the line would flash blue before reverting back to red then doing the same thing again. This, of course, was because when I redrew the line starting from the beginning, the code to actually set x to 0 and to redraw the line in another colour was in the last if loop, causing the line to just restart drawing in red when the function was called again. Now while the solution was simple, as most of you have probably encountered before, actually finding the problem is a much more difficult process. I cannot explain the many errors and hours (it was more like max 5 mins but it deffo felt like hours to me) that it took for me to finally understand exactly what the problem was. But alas, my stupidity doesn't end there! Take another snippet of code and output as example:

The way that I viewed this animation was like watching cars go by or maybe the windows of a train or something of the like truthfully as it is, it can be whatever your heart desires it to be. Regardless of how you might view it, though, nothing can deny my pain when trying to code this. So the steps when coding animation for a moving subject is as follows:

Clear the canvas

Draw the object(s) in their new position

Update positions based on logic

Repeat

Along with the rule that whenever you draw another shape, you must always context.beginPath(). Pretty simple, right? Well admittedly, yes it is fairly simple HOWEVER recall my previous mention of my monke brain you will also have to remember that I fail do simple procedural things. Now I hope you have realized where this is going. When trying to code the blue moving square, I came across a problem. Suddenly my red square had disappeared like my hopes and dreams. But how could all the (extremely simplistic like a kindergartner's drawing probably worse if I'm being honest) cars looks the same? Where's the diversity? After hours (again, minutes) of searching my code to figure out who had been the cause of this devastation (it's me) I had finally found the reason(s). The first problem was that I had added another context.clearRect(). Because of this problem, I had completely erased all red cars from showing themselves, leaving a hole gaping hole where they would've been found. Now once fixing that problem, everything should be fine right? Wrong. I had accidentally forgot to include context.beginPath() meaning that while now there were the proper amount of cars, there was still a lack in diversity. Failing to execute this code causes the former shape to inherit the same characteristics as the latter shape which caused all my cars to become blue (kinda like white wash-). Finally, once that code was added into the correct place, it finally looked like as it should.