#d20 poetic thoughts

[thisisnotthenerd]

ivy is fig if she took after her mom just a little bit more and chose to break relationships rather than making them

kipperlilly takes all of adaine & riz's worst traits and reflects them. the determination to help (/make) the party do well, but by playing by her own rules rather than the system

mary ann is like gorgug if he never reached out with a tin flower on the first day--disinterested in the things she does

oisín takes the rich kid schtick and the advantage of birth like fabian

buddy is kristen pre-growth, without the wherewithal to break from tradition

ruben, famous for his music, looks down on fig where she would extend a hand

twisted reflections of themselves in people who have schemed their way into easy success and are now actively trying to take them down

starting the season with in endless night, trapping an eldritch deity level entity. literal dark night of the soul going into a metaphorical dark night of the soul

what a way to portray high school

[andi-o-geyser]

somewhere, in elias' heart, the city of boston is burning

[takaraphoenix]

There is something both poetic and ironic about the first Dimension 20 campaign I watched being Misfits and Magic and the last one I now had left to watch (until the next one airs) being A Court of Fey and Flowers.

Poetic because both are Aabria DMing season, ironic also for that reason, considering this is the Brennan Lee Mulligan show.

There were two reasons why I picked Misfits and Magic as my entry to Dimension 20, and to DnD in general actually. One was the obvious length - this was only one of two seasons that are four episodes long and as someone with no knowledge or experience with DnD, the thought of kicking it off with 20 episodes which each were like 2 hours was absolutely mortifying. This felt more... doable. Even if I don't entirely vibe with it, it's just 4 episodes, I will finish it. The other reason was Danielle Radford, actually, because I adore her and seeing her on this was really ?!?! to me.

Six months and 18 campaigns later, you could say that I got very hooked, on both Dimension 20 specifically and DnD in general.

The funny thing is that I saw Brennan as a player first, before I met him as a DM. And I loved him playing. I love him as a DM even more, but looking at how many campaigns I would get to see him DM vs how few D20 campaigns he is a player on, made me quickly put A Court of Fey and Flowers back.

I had a whacky and random ranking system by which I watched them, it started out by length (well, more or less; the second campaign I watched was Mice and Murder for the all College Humor cast, since College Humor was what introduced me to Brennan and why I came to Dimension 20 to begin with), but after the first four campaigns, I knew I was hooked on this style of storytelling, so it became more like "this premise sounds particularly promising, I want to save that for later", so I saved what I hoped would be the best for last.

(And I more or less did; A Starstruck Odyssey and A Court of Fey and Flowers were the last two left and they absolutely will make it into my top three.)

And A Court of Fey and Flowers is genuinely such a good place to "end" (it's not really an ending, the next campaign literally dropped a trailer last week), I am enjoying this so much.

And that is partially due to loving Brennan's player energy, it is also very very much my growing love for Aabria's storytelling and world building, it's the incredibly dynamic that Lou and Emily chose for their characters, it's the incredible Rue/Hob romance because I didn't think I'd ever be invested in a PC/PC romance, it's the whole setting and fairy theme that is something I love already, and it's also the lack of fighting.

I know DnD is a lot about fighting. But I think I prefer it when it's more roleplay and less fighting (and it doesn't have to be no fighting, I just think 50/50 is too much fighting, and with many fight heavy campaigns, this was very refreshing and delightful to watch).

The point, to get back on track, is that A Court of Fey and Flowers really hits all of the right spots. I am deeply in love with this campaign and I know I will be revisiting this a lot and I'm grateful for the beautiful world Aabria crafted, and for the talented lineup of players she invited to take part in it. And I'm grateful to her for being my introduction to DnD, to begin with.

[charmophron]

Hi! I found your Eddie DMing art on twitter and may have creeped on the replies where u and other ppl were talking about Eddie being v much aligned with Brennan Lee Mulligan and now my fave brain worms are co-mingling and I can’t stop thinking about Eddie and the Party as different players from Dimension 20! [lmao so the rest of this ask is assuming u watch D20 and if u don’t, my apologies for the following gibberish] After much consideration I have some to the following assessment: Erica is Murph — very straightforward and Lawful, pragmatic and crunchy with rules, but I can see her also bursting out into giggles when another member does something outlandish and her just having the sweetest open mouth smile on her face; I think Dustin is probably Lou — very much into RP and building serious personal relationships with NPCs, also delightfully boastful and vocal about his characters’ dramatic successes and failures; if Robin ever gets into playing she’s Ally — no explanation necessary, pure chaos always breaking Eddie’s brain with her Nat20s; Will is Siobhan — less obviously goofy character but absolutely killer reactions and instincts, extremely clever and plays emotional beats very honestly and close to the surface, always joins in when players bashing are the DM; Lucas I can see as Zac — not so much with the type of characters he plays but in the unexpected but always in-character choices he makes at clinical moments and poetic less-is-more lines that he proudly delivers to have everyone at the table in hysterics; that leaves Mike as Emily — I thought about a lot of diff ppl as Emily but this makes so much sense to me, the pure commitment to hilarious decisions just to see where they go (especially when Eddie is playing along and the rest of the players are Losing It), the joy earned from truly whomping the DM with a Plan, and the uncontrollable excitement of having the choices he made Pay Off in dramatic climaxes; oh and in the unlikely case that Steve gets bribed into playing and having the time of his life he’s obvs Izzy — his chemistry with Eddie has him heightening every interaction they have until he’s out of breath … ok so I did not mean for this lil thought experiment to be this long, apologies! Feel free to ignore/reply/do with it what you will! And if I may be so bold as to suggest that if u continue drawing Stranger Things characters doing D&D, I think using screen caps of D20 moments as photo references would be galaxy brain levels of enjoyable :) ok that’s all thank u pls have a lovely day xoxo

ily d20 anon

[highermagic]

thoughts from Neverafter as they're happening (light spoilers honestly mostly just reaction)

fuckkkk me Brennan don't do this to me in the intro!!! Lou I fucking love you coming in swinging you're best boy <3 Brennan as the evil stepmother is so fucking hot I can't stand it oh my god. Evil stepmommy I adore you. Lou does such an endearing child, his character is so good and Lou and Brennan's chemistry is so electric all the time I love how they play off each other. I literally can't concentrate on the story because I'm so enamored with their performances jeebus xmas. SENATOR!!!! SHOUTOUT TO SENATOR!!! Lou is always so sassy I love him. Brennan you need to CALM your VOICE and EYES okay I can only be so Normal about this. fdadlsf the nat20 oh my god what timing. that was fucking wild WHAT DOES IT MEAN BRENNAN WHAT THE FUCK DOES IT ALL MEANNN.

oh my god. it's infinite stories. infinite chances, as long as you're willing to sacrifice all the potential happiness of other versions of yourself oh my god. how many versions of yourself must you kill to get your happy ending. THAT'S POETIC AS FUCK BRENNAN OH MY GOD.

why do they have to do all these things individually my poor babies /sob curiosity killed the cat Pib pls my boy do not I believe in catboy Zach supremacy o7 Zach is so funny I can't stand it. I love this sort of surrealist comradery shit so much ahhh Fox & Rabbit & Cat adventures when. PIB GETS REINCARNATIONS BC CATS HAVE NINE LIVES I'M!!!! This is so pure I love them so muuuuuuuuuch /sob ZACH BRO YO??? THREATENING KITTY CAT??!!! YOOOO??? I love themmmm I'm going to lay down on the floor and cry, Zach is the best <3

breaks my heart they're doing all this separately though I know why, I feel like Emily is probs the only one watching everyone's to keep things separated.

NO NOT THE GLASS GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY GIRL YOU GLASS BITCH. tho I will admit that glass armor idea is metal as fuck so I love that. ooooooof the lore of princesses who get a perfect happy ever after and cinderella's bitterness and OOOOOOOOOOOOF subversion is so delicious omnomnomnom Rosamund is so precious I love her <3 Brennan choosing to expose the entire multiverse to the character least equipped to understand it is such a Brennan thing to do I cannot with this man. I retract my complaint about Cinderella I love her now lmao

I fucking love existential dread fuck me up with that good shit!!! Scream at destiny question everything rewrite the stories and examine everything!!! Fuck me up!!

"Just because you were lied to doesn't mean everything is a lie. Do not take the crimes of those who manipulated you and lay them at the feet of the world. We write the story." ONCE AGAIN THANK YOU FOR THE FREE THERAPY D20!!! <3

FUCK 'EM UP ROSAMUND!!! FUCK 'EM UP!!!!

big bad wolf Brennan is also very very hot I can't help myself and I won't apologize, it's the Calroy voice too it's just, oof, monsterfucker card presented and ready. fdsjdlsfs Emily you're so cute stop it right now 'I'm sorry I said freak at you' stop <3 BRO??? 'the only time you'll accept to make your life worthwhile is forever' ????? WHAT THE FUCK BRENNAN JESUS. you can't just 1 hit K.O. philosophy like that without warning jesus FUCK that is so attractive I'm going to die. morally neutral predatory monster is my fucking WEAKNESS GAWWD. Emily is so chaotic oh my god I love this so much. her commitment to a bit is god-like <3 "You're my princess" PLEASE I love them ahhhhhh

This is so fucking cool as a premise honestly like. Every time I get so blown away by Brennan's lore and storybuilding he one-ups it again I can't fucking deal with it.

MURPH C'MON BABY BOY LET'S GO. I love when they come in and sass Brennan, bestie behavior <3 oh feck off you fairie bish fdsjkdls cutting from Murph's hysterics to Brennan's hands to face thing was so goddamn... the drama, the vibes of this interaction is so fucking good omfg it's giving 'diva and overworked PA' energy Gerard 'keep my wife's name out your fucking mouth' Greenleigh my beloved <3 hhhhhhhh Brennan does such good subtle shit and inflection I can't, it's got big priest character vibes right now oof also pretty gold sparkles in the background love that for Murph, v flattering. ummm that origin story??? o.o

Brennan is going to get his PVP before he dies calling it now.

HYONK HYONK MOTHERFUCKER LET'S GOOO I hope Nat King Cole is the running joke of the seasons pls. such geese slander lmao but consider: they are delicious pls confirm my book theoryyyyyyyyyyyyy probably not but like. god. imagine if that's how it has to end. the perfect ending is the one immortalized in the books. I M A G I N E. OH MY GOD IS IT?? AM I??? WAS I RIGHT omg oh that's so cool, the multiverse trippiness is the best thing ever golden goose really said no notes lmao fdhasadsfs that beanstalk retelling I love it so soft omg goose hugs <333

OH MY GOD THEY DON'T GET TO KNOW EVERYONE ELSE'S STORIES I KNEW IT THEY'RE GONNA BE SO CONFUSED FUCK!!!

I'm so fascinated by this world building and I love it so much, 1000/10 Brennan no notes.

[illithidprone]

@spellstole liked this for a lil TAZ quote starter...and the d20 chose Halsin

It had been...A night, to say in the least. There had been so much bloodshed, so much unanticipated pain.

So much loss.

The camp was silent, and dark. Only the moon cast light upon them, for even the camp's fire was completely burnt out - save for a thin layer of weakly growing ember.

Halsin sat quietly on the ground, legs crossed and hands in his lap as dark eyes bore into those embers with immense thought and concentration. It was sudden when he spoke, the first tobreak the heavy silence, although his voice was no more than a subtle whisper.

“Not all exits are made equal. Some are beautiful, and poetic, and satisfying. Others are abrupt and unfair. But… most are unremarkable, unintentional, and clumsy."

[d20and]

d20 and anthroponymy

Names are cool. “Jawbone” is an excellent name for someone who can rip out a throat with his bite and heal a shattered heart with his words. “Misty Moore” is poetic, fanciful, and melodious—much like the grande dame herself. One of our newer heroes, “Sir Theobald Gumbar,” has an extremely good name, and I suspect Brian Murphy chose it precisely. I have found three things that make it satisfying, and since I notice and value names, I enjoy learning where they are from, why they were chosen, and what they mean. It turns out there is an entire branch of social science that I did not know existed until this week: anthroponymy.

Anthroponymy is the study of human names. Linguists, anthropologists, historians, genealogists, and other experts all lend their talents to uncovering the origins and implications of what we choose to call ourselves, from casual nicknames to broad reaching national identities. Anthroponymy can tell us more about who has lived in an area, how a human group organizes themselves, or what a certain people value most.

For example, in ancient Greece, patrilineage was especially important and it was traditional for a grandson to be named after his grandfather. The philosopher Aristotle was the son of Nicomachus and, keeping custom, named his son Nicomachus. This custom was handy for Aristotle because he was able to his most famous work, the Nicomachean Ethics, after both of them. Since he learned moral wisdom from his father and taught it to his son, his choice of name is especially satisfying.

Anthroponymists focused in the origin of names trace the linguistic roots of our monikers. The original language of the name often lingers long after its meanings are forgotten. But many parents still choose baby names for the meaning as much as the musicality, perhaps hoping that the name shapes the child’s life. Trans folx have the wonderful but stressful experience of naming themselves which most of us will never undertake. Many gamers put so much thought into their character’s name that they struggle more with it than their school of magic or fighter class. Even when we don’t care, we still care a little—random name generator buttons are rarely clicked only once, I have found.

Although it may be simple superstition, the psychological impact of knowing your name’s meaning could factor into your expectations for yourself. Does Emily Axford know that her name means “industrious” and “hardworking,” a fitting name for a focused person who takes copious notes and creates detailed plans? Surely she would be just as productive if her name were Amity (“friendship” & “harmony”), right? There is a theory called nominative determinism that tries to explain why people with the last name Banks might be more likely to pursue a career in finance and why there might be a higher rate of Denises in the field of dentistry. On the other hand, I’m sure it is easy to find a clumsy Grace, a melancholy Ashok, and a Fabian who has never grown or sold a bean. (Yep, Fabian means “bean grower” — even for his own my darling man boy!)

So, what about Sir Theobald Gumbar, who stands ready to protect the royal House Rocks? Why did Murph choose those names in particular? The surname is easy: half of gummy and part of bear (or an anglicized take on the German version, bär). It also has a good tone, a solid ring to it. It sounds substantial when said aloud, which is appropriate for a protector.

Looking at the first name, I already knew that theo means “god” in Greek and that “Theodore” means “gift of God.” The suffix -bald sounds like the Greek root bal- which means “throw”, so I guessed perhaps “God’s throw” or “God strikes.” But I discovered that “Theobald” has no connection to “Theodore” whatsoever and doesn’t originate in Greek. 

“Theobald” is a Germanic name, and it means “courageous people,” from theod (“people”) and bald (“brave,” “bold,” “courageous”). When it made its way into French, it became Thibault, and by the time Shakespeare wrote Romeo and Juliet, one variation was Tybalt.

So what’s in a name? One extremely silly reason that “Theobald” fits so well is simple. There are lots of bears in the world with various types of fluff and fur, but only one type of bear is best when it is “bald”: the gummy bear. And it’s not only best when it is bald—it’s awful when it isn’t!

With that unappetizing idea behind us, let’s look again. While I think it would chafe him, Sir Theo could go by a different nickname, which gives us the first real reason it is so fitting. Teddy is usually a nickname for Theodore, but it works for Theobald, too. And there is a great comfort to be found in a protective, armored and highly skilled teddy bear. 

The second reason it is a great name: its meaning. Sir Theobald doesn’t think he’s God gift or sent by Bulb. (But I bet Sir Theodore would.) He knows he’s a common man, but he has uncommon courage. He doesn’t hesitate but also isn’t reckless. Theo is dauntless, not rash or cowardly. He is from a brave people. Sir Theo the Bold is very cool. (He’s always been cool! Always!)

Finally, what’s the best reason that Murph chose wisely? “Theobald” is German, and so is the sweet Gummibär! Gummy bears were invented in Bonn, Germany in 1922 by Hans Riegel Sr. After training and working as a confectioner, in 1920 he founded a company you may have heard of: HARIBO! (HA for Hans, RI for Reigel, and BO for Bonn, and all caps always!)

Herr Riegel figured out how to mold sweet and chewy gelatin treats using molds stamped into cornstarch. He decided to call them “little rubber bears”—that is, Gummibärchen! Sold as “Dancing Bears,” these treats were larger but not quite as chubby as the little ones we have today, but in 1960, the iconic Gold-Bären were introduced and became an international success. Today, HARIBO manufactures 160 million Gold-bären every day across the world, using both traditional and vegan recipes.

So there you have it. Sir Theobald Gumbar, the gummibär with the golden armor, was given a wonderful name by Brian Murphy. His name is Irish, by the way. Brian has hazy origins but is likely from the Old Celtic for “noble” and Murphy is derived from the original Gaelic word murchadh meaning “sea warrior.” So Murph, you’re destined to become a noble sea warrior!

Sir Theo will be one first, though, as the Munch Bunch fight off a naval attack on next week’s Dimension 20: A Crown of Candy. Catch up on dropout.tv and watch Wednesday, May 27 at 7PM EDT/4PM PDT on youtube.com/dimension20show!

[loquaciousquark]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E23 (June 19, 2018)

Welcome to tonight’s Talks Machina. Today’s preshow: the weather throughout the Dwendalian Empire. I’m sure this isn’t foreboding at all. Tonight’s guests: Matt & Emmy-award-winning Sam Riegel. Sam has a prepared bit for the opening that he just found out he was supposed to prepare. He gets out, “How many... light bulbs...” before BWF has pity and throws us to the title screen.

Tonight’s announcements: New M9 shirt in the new CR store at shop.critrole.com. The show also now has their very own dedicated Critical Role Youtube & Twitch channels--however, don’t worry, as it’ll still be broadcast in all current locations as well. After Dark will continue to be available on After Dark only. There also will not be any Talks Machina or new Critical Role episode July 3 or July 5, as they’ll be making the move to a new studio during this week. (Marisha’s stepped down at G&S to make this move to full-time CR management as well.) There’s a summary post of these announcements with a FAQ on critrole.com, if you need more information.

Before we can get to CR Stats, Sam interrupts to ask Matt why they’ve never had an NPC with a French accent. Matt, answering in an excellent French accent, explains that they’ve not come across any regional areas that are analogous to France yet. He suggests they visit the Menagerie Coast.

CR Stats! The M9 have now officially rolled 99 natural ones. Nott’s in the lead with 22. Sam only has one d20 that he rolls, and he thinks Laura’s bad luck is rubbing off on him.

The M9 have now been traveling together for about a month. Matt, deadpan: “They’re such a tight-knit family.” He does like that everyone’s getting to see the ground-floor development and occasionally has to remind himself to set the scene because he gets sucked into the roleplay.

Kiri has imitated people 82 times--Sam loves Matt’s imitations.

The D&D Beyond theme song was a greater achievement than the Emmy (per Sam): “It was a thing that I just came up with...that became the anthem for a generation.” The Emmy is a bucket list, pinnacle professional achievement, but he loves that he got to write & make the theme song. (Also: two years on one cartoon vs. fifteen minutes on a song.)

Matt has a tumultuous history with the Streamys. He directed a web series ten years ago and was invited to contribute to a big montage...only to find out right before the show that it had been cut from the program altogether.

The battle with the Merrow played out fairly close to how Matt had envisioned it, although the players’ positioning led to some interesting situations. It was more challenging in certain moments without Nott, especially when Matt was trying to decide how certain events would play out. Sam sidebars to point out how much he loves it when a battle changes halfway through (either due to traps, additional enemies, or the map changing). Matt says there are many battles they’ve had in the past where certain traps were never triggered. However, you can’t do it too often or it becomes expected. (Matt does feel bad when he’s rolling well and the PCs are rolling badly.)

Nott’s water thing Sam invented during the game (because he thought it would be funny, natch), but he’s come up with a backstory since then that explains why she’s so afraid of water.        

Matt plays out combat as designed even when a PC suddenly decides to not participate--unless it’s a new group that doesn’t fully understand D&D combat yet, and it would impact their enjoyment of the game. He wants people to understand that there are consequences with character choices. 

Sam often finds it bothersome when they know they’ve missed something in game, especially when it’s an important story beat. It’s the worst when Matt gives them multiple chances to succeed, and they still end up failing all of them. Matt confesses sometimes he makes them roll checks on general knowledge they’d have known anyway just to make them feel a certain esoteric skill was useful for once. 

Nott feels terrible she sat out the Merrow fight only for Caleb to come close to death. Sam: “Nott feels awful about it. Sam Riegel feels great about it! I love situations where it doesn’t look like it’s going well.” Plus, the night before she also got Caleb in trouble with the bowl thing. BWF’s a little worried it’ll affect their relationship.

Matt claims that Kiri was not at all related to wanting to prove he could do Jester’s accent. He rolls for random encounters when they’re traveling, and Kiri was one he’d considered to demonstrate the presence of kenku, while also highlighting that non-Empire people are moving away from the conflict. He half-expected them to ignore her altogether. 

Matt reveals that Kiri has six (6) (SIX) hit points. “She’s practically a baby bird!” Sam has a retroactive panic attack that they’ve been bringing her to all these battles. Me too, bud. Sam accuses Matt of “not having brought anyone worthy of taking a baby bird off our hands.” Matt: “You haven’t even looked!” They wonder together about the possibility of a baby bird orphanage in Hupperdook.

GIF of the Week! @justjamesearle. It’s long and perfect and details the Fjord whack-a-mole death saga with the venom splashes. 

Nott’s opinion of Kiri hasn’t changed at all with the reveal that she heard/repeated her conversation with Caleb. Sam thinks Nott should have known better than to talk with a recording device in the room, especially since she only ever repeats it when it’s hilarious or well-timed. “It’s hard to live with a soundboard.”

Matt keeps a list of notes of what Kiri can say. It’s super fun, and he sometimes gets so caught up in conversations he forgets to write down things for her to repeat later.

Nott wished Kiri hadn’t repeated the facts from her backstory, but she’d never considered being aggressive towards “little RiRi” (oh God it’s too adorable). She still doesn’t like a lot of attention. Both BWF & Sam applaud Matt for giving them little prods to reveal backstory.

Dagon, Matt & Marisha’s bird, provides a lot of inspiration for Kiri. Matt talks about being a bird owner after growing up with cats and dogs, and reveals that wanting to utilize that knowledge was part of why he introduced kenku.

Nott finds Beau the exception to her general mistrust of the group, which is why she let her care for Caleb after the last fight. She feels Beau has been weirdly sensitive and protective even through her lens of abrasiveness, and she respects that she hasn’t spilled the beans about Caleb’s backstory.

Fanart of the Week! @obeymybrain, which is a great group portrait in four vertical-column stylings after the Haunted Mansion from Disneyland.

If the troll hadn’t been slowed by Caleb, Matt thinks the group would have permanently lost someone. Matt loves the new monsters that are punishing to melee characters. He thinks they did a good job damaging it at range at first, and Sam waxes poetic on all the options they didn’t pursue instead (like Saran-wrapping the door before it came running out). Oh, what could have been.

Sam’s love for Liam is stronger than Nott’s love for Caleb, because “...Liam kisses back.” They’ve known each other half their lives now.

If the M9 pursue dynamite as a common battle tactic, Matt may need to prepare for his builds to be destroyed more often. It’s still limited by the relatively new availability of blackpowder and has a high possibility of backfiring depending on their rolls.

Nott wishes she could tell everything to Caleb, but is limited by the realities of their show, since it’s hard to find a time that’s not full of dick or drug jokes. There’s been times they’ve been alone together but Caleb hasn’t asked any questions; Sam thinks “He needs to do some Marisha-style questioning. That is an inquisitive monk, and I love her for it.” Matt points out it’s a critical aspect of her character that she wants to know everything.

Matt played out the last Fjord moment in front of the whole group in part because it would have interrupted the flow to have everyone leave, and in part because he trusts his players not to metagame now that they’re all learning bits and pieces of each other. He liked the visceral smash-cut of the vision to the party watching Fjord jam this thing into his stomach.

Matt does have to juggle all the party’s backstories since it’s such a large group; some will be long-game just because of the natures of their stories. He likes to drop threads as they go, though, so everyone feels more connected to their world. Players feel like the stakes are higher when they can see their stories reflected and affecting the living and breathing world around them.

Nott wasn’t particularly bothered by Molly immediately forgiving the bandits right after they hurt her. “They’re just dumb. They’re just dumb and they need to go. They’re too dumb to hurt.”

Matt knew the outline of Hupperdook before the party ever heard of it. Now that they’ve expressed interest in it, he’s begun filling in the details since it looks likely that they’ll visit it soon. It helps that they’re limited to speed of foot & horse; when they can start bamfing everywhere in later game, it gets a lot harder. Matt’s advice in that situation is to give the town a unique social structure or aspect, to make a bold choice that will cause it to stand out in their mind. It helps if you can ask what the players are looking for, then “yes and” based on what they’re seeking (he builds an idea of two competing taverns poaching clients from each other off a spur-of-the-moment request from a player asking if there’s an inn nearby).

Sam does rehearse his more performative ads ahead of time. He usually writes them the day of over lunch, although lately he’s been trying to get them done on Mondays and Tuesdays so he’s not as stressed on Thursday.

There’s no specific inspirational character for the Gentleman. Matt wanted to create an outside-the-law businessman who wasn’t your typical ~thief-lord~ while still seeming unique against the world. He wanted him to be charismatic and domineering, welcoming until you crossed a personal or business line, in which case he’d immediately put you in your place. 

Nott still considers her old goblin tribe a threat to her & is reluctant to confront them. She does feel a little more prepared now that she has more allies, but is hesitant to meet old demons & old memories. Matt sidebars to point out that a lot of these character backstories could be self-driven, since there’s nothing keeping them from visiting Nott’s hometown now. They could pursue it at any time if they wanted.

The firearms in the world are a direct result from Percy & Ripley; she dealt them out in heavy trade areas like Marquet, which results in the technology being distributed in a way that now impacts the M9 in their world. They’re still limited by materials, though.

Matt loves the joy on Tal’s face every time they mention firearms are readily available in Wildemount.

Everyone’s distraught over Tal’s Vicious Mockery in the last episode. Bless his heart. Matt: “Sometimes you come out of the gate and realize you’ve come out without your pants on. You commit, and you walk away.”

Sam misses giving inspiration on a regular basis. He also has a lot of insecurities over his current inability to contribute to a battle with much more than crossbow bolts. BWF: “Just sent Nott to a bard college.” Matt: With a -3 charisma, I think you’re taking inspiration away from people.”

Favorite M9 voice to mimic as Kiri? Partially Jester, because it’s just funny, Nott is shrill and ridiculous, and has lately been enjoying mimicking Fjord for the few times he’s been echoed.

The Nott voice is not hard at all on Sam; it’s mostly falsetto, which BWF says he usually talks in off-camera all the time anyway.

After Dark: After This

In CriticalRoleLand, Dani would like to see Vex’s Flying Brooms. BWF suggests a waterslide that ends in Vex’s & Percy’s bathtub; Matt suggests it be a goldfish ride that goes over the side. He also likes a teleporting ride that goes into Umbrasyl’s belly, and Sam comes up with a dunk tank for heckling Tary.

Matt talks about that viral Youtube video with the weather forecaster naming the city that’s like 100 characters long. Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch, that’s the one.

Nott’s Tinder profile? “Short, green, looking for mean. Buy me a drink and I’m yours.”

Matt wouldn’t be surprised if this campaign does eventually touch on family in the same way the first one did. However, Sam feels so far it’s much more about identity, and Matt tacks on regret & making amends. He also thinks trust & learning to accept help from others is still developing, since so many of these characters have been hurt in some way.

VM had a lot of very classical heroic archetypes; this campaign is full of many more human, subtly complicated characters. Matt loves the contrast.

The eyes. The EYES.

Sam agonizes that in his Friday retellings of the campaign’s story to his six-year-old son, it drives him crazy that he can’t answer his son’s questions as to why something happened. His son does ask “does Matt Mercer know?” and Sam is glad he can say yes.

Sam loves the idea of the world hinging on the bandit troupe they keep running into. I debated troop or troupe there, but given the hysterics they keep causing, I’m sticking with troupe.

If they met, Nott would steal every single thing from Taryon Darrington. Except that lame book, of course. “That’d be amazing. And! Possible! We’re on the continent, right?” Sam rubs his hands together gleefully...until Matt points out Taryon’s been relegated to NPC status & Matt would be the one controlling him now.

Matt usually prepares a guest for the show by meeting with them ahead of time. Depending on how much (or if ever) they’ve played before, he helps them build a character and teaches them the basics of the class. Mark, obviously, didn’t need that introduction, so instead they focused on loose backstory and finding ways to integrate that backstory into the existing world. When it’s time for them to actually play, they’ll discuss in advance a way to bring their paths across each other, such as Cali looking for a specific relic at the same time that the M9 were going to be investigating a safehouse full of stolen relics. As soon as they meet, it’s hands off. (It can be hard to get someone out of the group if they for sure can’t return the next week.)

MAJOR, MAJOR, MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THE END OF CAMPAIGN ONE IN THE SECTION BELOW.

BWF jokes that last campaign Joe Manganiello just showed up and said, “Hey, so, I’m playing Arkhan,” and that was that. Actually...that’s pretty close to what really happened. Matt & Joe did meet for a long evening in Joe’s kitchen in advance to discuss backstory & motivations, after which he finally managed to convince Joe’s wife, Sofía Vergara, to play a small game with him, Joe, and Marisha. Sam laughs that at Matt & Marisha’s wedding, they had two sentences with Joe before the conversation immediately devolved into D&D and Joe’s wife rolled her eyes out of her head.

They did discuss that Joe wanted to steal the hand at the end of the last campaign. “You don’t have the Hand of Vecna, the Hand of Vecna has you.” They had a long conversation about Arkhan’s denouement after that episode.

END OF MAJOR, MAJOR SPOILERS.

And that’s all for the night! Have a lovely week, and is it Thursday yet?

[cassandra-bites]

DIE #3, by Kieron Gillen, Stephanie Hans, Clayton Cowles ...

Thoughts on this poster. Spoilers beneath the cut.

Seen in a hobbit’s flashbacks to Little England, the propaganda poster is remarkably complex. Against a red background featuring dragons and a number of eight-sided stars (or stylized suns), a lion, its mane stylized to resemble rays of sun, speaks to potential recruits from a centered, pale circle, its words - “I need you!” - punctuated with dots evocative of the Tengwar alphabet. Much like Uncle Sam, who points and glares at the viewer in the famous recruitment image, the lion has a paw outstretched and pointing - though it it is with claws that he points, not fingers, and a gaping maw that shows many teeth, that both speaks and speaks to devouring, to fire and mutilation. 

The poster calls back to other references - the use of lions as a national symbol in British war propaganda, for instance, not least in propaganda aimed at "overseas states” - Australia, Canada, India, New Zealand:

As @gen-is-gone has pointed out on Twitter and for the @die-compressed podcast (which includes many great observations), the sun-lion also works as a reference to Aslan, to C. S. Lewis and his approach to fantasy. 

Tolkien has been a presence in the comic from the beginning (Isabelle calls Ash "Gaylord of the Assrings" in the first issue, the second issue reckons with the legacies of elves and orcs, etc), but so too has Lewis, invoked in the second issue by Chuck:

DIE #2, by Kieron Gillen, Stephanie Hans, Clayton Cowles ...

Leaving aside this meta-commentary on the relationship between how you enter Die and how you enter Narnia, the relationship between the recruitment poster and Narnia’s Aslan is laid out with more than lion imagery. In the books, Aslan is associated with the sun and related emblems, such as gold (much as Solomon has been in the comic, as the “golden child” nicknamed “Sol” ... ). A “rhyme” about Aslan in The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe, includes the lines: “when he [Aslan] bares his teeth winter meets its death and when he shakes his mane we shall have spring again”. Echoes of this Aslan-as-Christ-allegory is not only to be seen in the poster, it can also be heard when the comic’s hobbit-reference speaks of being promised spring ... and concludes the promise was false. 

Given Tolkien’s apparent dislike of Narnia, his critiques of allegory for its dictatorial relationship to readers, for its reduction of interpretative freedom to the act of recognizing one-to-one correspondences between fiction and religious ideas or historical events, it’s notable that his reference character in Die is stuck in an a place that situates his work against WWI. But if allegory is veiled comparison, this “hell” unveils. There’s no coyness here about the terms of comparison. 

On the contrary - allegory is “ugly”, Tolkien’s reference says, but “poetry” and “war poetry” are something else. What they are is not directly stated; what they could be is hinted at in how, by telling the life-stories of the dead, the comic’s poet-like character - Ash, a kind of bard - invokes grief, making it possible for Matt to kill the dragon. Warden of the “orcish mockery of my elvish tale”, the Tolkien reference character also bears witness to how war devours “better men”, as though to ask readers to imagine the hobbits not only as references of his own creation and his own history, but also as references to dead who can no longer speak for themselves. To be sure, “this is not what I wanted”. Whether he refers to his antipathy towards “ugly” allegory, to Die’s interpretation of his “elvish tale”, or to something else, he also acknowledges that - still, the dead “should be remembered”, their “message” sent “home”, and so he stays. 

(There’s a lot of weight put on this staying. Whether he must stay in the trenches or could be elsewhere in Little England is one question; possibly he stays too as an enduring presence or legacy). 

At the same time, the Tolkien reference is shown to be an inefficient messenger. The eagle he sends is far too large and easily spotted; the message is shot down with the messenger. If his attempts to keep memory alive with “poetry”, or “war poetry”, are potentially recognized in a comic that itself draws on poetic techniques (by which I mean: techniques that create patterns with words, producing relations of similarity and dissimilarity - I’m not using poetry as a synonym for romanticization), there also remains plenty of room to critique his methods.

Not only his. There is something indeed rather sinister, to me at least, about the poster of the British Lion as the Sun / Aslan. The Tolkien reference in Die is an officer who sends men to their deaths but also directly risks his own life in the trenches (assuming he can die as the Grandmaster apparently could). He honors the memories of the dead - memories that are subsequently captured, declared propaganda by the enemy (a rival Master?), and destroyed. What is destroyed with those final words, those words Ash herself noted down for a dying man, is certainly a critique of propaganda - critique of the reference to Narnia-as-allegory. The hobbit reference warns his family, tells his wife not to send their boy into battle. For the lion poster tricks the vulnerable into believing there will be spring, and sells lies about a life beyond war, beyond death.

Such allegory would be “ugly”, indeed.

Taking another close look at the poster - those eight-sided stars, in addition to referencing suns (and sun-gods), could they also be a reference to the numbered face occupied by Little England on the D20 world that is Die? Looking at Angela’s map in issue #2, the route through the war zone seems to snake between the faces numbered 8 and 9, which could be Little England and Eternal Prussia, respectively, while 10 would correspond to the Seas of Gondol.

In this context, it’s worth noting that star symbols have come up before - the Elf-Queen wore two five-sided stars that dangled from her tiara and another on her chest, from where it shines. 

This could suggest she is from a realm correlating to the face numbered 5 on the map - which, to be sure, isn’t shown. By the time we see Angela’s map, the party has been traveling a while, so their position around 7 may not reflect where they started. But it's certainly possible that the stars correspond to something else; my point is more that stars have been prominently shown and might be worth paying attention to in future (similarly, Chuck’s necklaces? are fascinating ...).

(I’m a bit worried this comes across as though I were trying to nail down what the comic is - which is not the intention at all. The comic seems to be doing hundreds of things at once, which makes me want to think aloud - because that is fun and a good distraction from darker places. That’s all these posts are about, that and the hope of getting to talk to others about the comic.) 

[everyonesomething]

Session Ten

Sydney Gaydos goes O: "Gaydos doesn't believe she's had the pleasure of deep-dish pizza. Well, it will the Great Detective's Treat!"

Malkas: "Thanks Syd."

Edith Runekill: "I mean, see, that's just it!!! Here I am, being slung over the shoulder of my HANDSOME BOYFRIEND, in a cool, smoke-filled pool hall, after I watched two of my friends spend like ten minutes punching eachother in really cool ways???????"

Malkas does not trust her to go up stairs right now.

Edith Runekill: "And, like, I thought my life would just be I spend a few years in the city before I go back and become, I don't know, a farm wife???? Maybe do some agricultural magic????"

"Aaaaaa," she says, trying to sum things up a bit.

Grim just got called someone's friend

Grim does not know what to do with that

Malkas: "Corn magic!"

Edith Runekill: "I mean, corn magic is interesting!!! Agricultural magic is why the Plaguewrought Lands aren't wrought by plagues!! It's important, good work!!!"

"But it's not what I wanted. And I'm starting to think maybe what I want matters after all???"

Pepper: "I heard it's pretty amaizing, you could stalk out a good career in corn magic, right?"

Grim: "Don't encourage her."

Edith Runekill: "Yeah, it's... oh, stalk!!!! Hahahahaha! Hahahahahahaha, oh, Pepper. Stalk!!!!"

Grim: "You'll get an earful."

Malkas: "BA'AL."

Pepper squints at Grim. "I think you got popped harder than you think."

Edith Runekill: "An... ear... full. Oh sweet Auril!!!! Grim!!! You made a pun!!!!! Grim!!!!!"

Edith Runekill is wheezing hysterically

In this session we discover hidden depths to our party members.

The set-up: It's the evening of our lich-filled day and we're gathered at a poolhall for some much needed R&R.

The Game: The whole gang is sporting hot new threads because nothing takes your mind off near-death like buying an outfit.

Edith Runekill saunters into the pool haul-- wearing pants! And boots!! And a cool leather jacket!!! ...because her only other change of clothes is back at the Steele house.

Malkas is dressed in the same outfit but different colors.

Grim is wearing the poncho/cape/whatever situation that someone gave her, her old leather coat folded into her pack.

Sydney Gaydos is wearing the REAL and AUTHENTIC detective hat Pepper got her from their shopping trip!

Pepper has basically the same basic outfit with a nice silk handkerchief tucked into the pocket.

We look so good y'all.

Edith and Mal shoot a few games of pool while Pepper and Sydney waste money on the new pinball machine. Mal waves Grim over to join in their game who single-handedly clears the table before going back to being her usual level of social: hovering at the edge of the group and watching them goof off. Everyone else spends about 10 minutes crowded around the pinball machine before Pepper manages to hit the high score.

After that it's another round of pool: Mal and Edith vs Pepper and Syd. Edith is already drunk.

Pepper chalks up a cue. "Rack em up, then."

Edith Runekill: "Well, they say bad boys are hot! Haha. Uh."

Malkas racks up the balls, "Ohh Edith."

Edith Runekill: "Well, rack 'em...? Is that what they say?"

Malkas: "Please don't introduce new, funny words to Edi while she's drunk."

Pepper didn't think she had.

Edith Runekill: "Rack those balls. Haha. Um."

"Oh."

Edith Runekill has had maybe half of her drink at this point.

Edith Runekill | It's real bad.

The poolhall is also host to an amateur fight night in the basement, Grim, Syd, and Mal sign up leaving the two squishy casters to watch their things. Although Edith, drunk on cheap beer and her naturally rambunctious spirit, initially tries to sign up, too.

Mal's up first and fights some ugly mug known as Glass Ted who gives him a few body blows, then fights totally dirty by grabbing him by the tail and hurling him out of the ring. Edith is incensed.

Edith Runekill: "Mal, are you okay???"

"That [infernal] fucker!!"

Malkas rubs his the base of his tail, "I'll be fine."

Grim: "No magic, Runekill. You'd snap like a twig."

Edith Runekill: "What an [infernal] shithead [common] he was!!"

"I'm tougher than I look!!"

Grim: "That doesn't mean much."

Edith Runekill: "I, um."

Malkas: "Edith, I don't want to have to drag you home and explain to my mom what we've been doing."

Grim: "Tell you what, kid. Sit this one out and I'll show you how to throw a real punch when we get home."

Edith Runekill: "Oh!"

"S-sure!!"

Edith is a treasure and beloved asset to the team.

Grim's up next and her fight goes better, though her opponent does throw a handful of sand in her eyes at first before she trashes him. Syd gets revenge on Glass Ted for Mal. Soon it's down to just Grim and Syd as the finalists, and everyone really gets into it. How exciting!

Edith Runekill: "I'm glad this tournament is ending with chivalrous combat between two worthy opponents!!!"

"Haha."

Grim isn't that chivalrous though

Sydney Gaydos gets punched RIGHT IN THE SNOOT. Quite hard.

Edith Runekill winces at the blow. But, well, that's what happens in a fight...?

Malkas: "Oh Asmodeus."

Pepper directs some choice Elvish words to what she thinks of THAT punch.

Grim might be smaller than Syd but she fights like a sack of raccoons

Sydney Gaydos is doing that boxer hop since she's super into the moment

It comes down to the wire, but Syd manages to outlast Grim to win the match. Syd wins a sack of gold and Grim is in a good mood after the mutually-assured pummeling. Time for pizza! Mal and Grim go out to hail a cab and Edith keeps the mood light.

Edith Runekill: "Anyway, hey. Uh. Like. One gal to another. Do you ever get that feeling where, like, you just really admire another girl and like you want her to think you're good and cool and you also kind of want to be like her???? Does that ring a bell???"

Pepper looks at Syd like 'what'

Sydney Gaydos shoots Pepper a ?????? look.

Moving on.

All is forgotten when the gang gets to a pizza restaurant and is distracted by another pinball machine. Syd and Pepper make some headway into it, but then Edith comes over to show them the ropes. We wouldn't let her fight in the ring, but she's bound and determined to have her own battle of the night.

Edith Runekill: "All right, girls," she says, "Time to watch the pinball wizard at work."

Edith Runekill: rolling d20-2

(1)-2 = -1

Pepper watches Edith fall flat on her ass.

Malkas: "..."

Edith Runekill: "..."

"ta... da..."

Edith Runekill: "my poor butt"

Grim looks around

Grim: "..."

Pepper: "Definitely greasing the machine, here."

Sydney Gaydos helps the poor drunk Edith up.

Malkas: "... Okay."

Malkas goes to Fetch Edith.

Edith Runekill: "mal..."

"am i... dying..."

Malkas: "You okay, bunny?"

Edith Runekill: "mal... i love you... please remember me..."

Malkas lifts Edith up.

Grim is trying really hard not to laugh audibly

Edith Runekill: "Oof!"

Malkas: "I love you too. Let's get you some water."

Nora rolls up a new character out of shame.

Once she recovers some, Edith reminisces about life on the farm back in ol' Plaguewrought Land. Mal then waxes poetic about his job of tomb exploration for the museum: solving puzzles and traps that have stumped lesser researchers and preserving the history of it all. Grim shares her very practical reasons for bounty hunting: it's money and she's good at it. Syd tells us about her mothers and the Pixieton Detective Agency, her family's business—though she's cagey about how she came to be part of that family. Pepper uncharacteristically keeps her big mouth shut and doesn't say much of anything about herself other than claiming to have a restless spirit—well, that much is probably true.

The gang finishes out the pizza and the night with a better understanding of each other, even if nobody managed to beat that pinball machine.

[thisisnotthenerd]

how does it feel to be the rat grinders in that final fight

building up to a ritual you've spent the last year on, angry and tired and expending effort on this one thing so that you might finally get the recognition, the accolades you think you deserve. being special for once, in the face of a party of legend. of oracles and saints, angels and devils, great wizards and bards, inheritors of family legacy and tragedy alike who all seem to skate.

having to work hard in the shadows because you took the easy path and yet have to catch up with these people who so easily belittle you. seeing them rake in the benefits of popularity, running on a platform of flimsy ideas instead of true policy and yet still they have the school dancing to their tune. it's for the ritual, but the ache of it stings as they call you out again and again, laughing in your face for wanting something.

so much work, so much research, traveling and hiding for months as the bad kids are lauded and pass the year with a bullshit exam that you fail to rig against them, catching you in a moment of chance even as they survive what would kill you easily.

seeing them (her) haunt your dreams and die on your front lawn, forever chasing after someone who never existed in the first place. they imitate what they've seen of you. she disappears and yet is there to strike you down because the girl you think you could love hates you with all of her being.

being used by your teachers against your rivals and yet somehow they are nicer, closer to them than to you. more angry about their success, more invested in their progress.

summoning your full force, putting your family in danger, finally getting one over on them (her) only for them to be struck from the sky and thrown in your face as an insult.

seeing them going to work simply to decimate you and strike you down, with less power than you but more tenacity, more stamina, more true experience earned in the wide world. not knowing what to do as they do so with ease, dancing through the lava and flames with nary a thought but your destruction.

seeing them survive and bounce back from the attacks that struck down lucy. they didn't need rage to get here. they didn't need a nameless goddess, or midnights in the forest with monsters, spreading crystals in the dirt for a pieces of a plan years in the making.

18 seconds in and three of you are dead. there's no rage crystal that can save you this time. there's only blood and fire on the floorboards and the bad kids coming in for the glory again. they don't care that you're kids in their class.

with every moment it becomes clear that you are no longer people to them, just obstacles, failed investments, minor villains in their heroic journey.

was it worth it?

[thisisnotthenerd]

picture this: you're a busy working mom whose husband died on the job under mysterious circumstances, leaving you alone to raise your young son in a town with none of your family or support network, at a job that will never pay enough, no matter how much good work you do. your son at once idolizes his father and resents him for leaving, and has channeled all of his energy into solving mysteries without regard for his health or well-being.

you watch him get bullied, watch him get into fights constantly as he searches for his missing babysitter and the other missing girls in town. he wears a nickname given to him by a bully with pride and tries so hard to impress his friends. you see him build up a group of friends, only for them to go to jail. after your apartment is attacked, you go with him to prom to take down his evil vice principal, who killed your husband on an impulse. you devour the dragon who killed your husband and it tastes like hollow victory, like revenge for the man you can't bring back.

the next year, your son goes on spring break with his friends after he gets accosted by an entity that used to work with your husband and some kind of mirror entity that leaves shards in your apartment. you don't hear much from him on the trip until you see a pit fiend choke him out and kill him, on a livestream. your son gives up his worldly possessions for the sake of defeating an entity that was raised for the sake of the status of an elven family.

your son comes back from spring break with the name of an eldritch entity tattooed on his chest and tells you his father died because the being he used to work with put a target on his back. your son met his dead father in heaven after he went to hell as a litigator for his friend. your son has been threatened with death for existing and come back.

that summer, the eldritch entity is summoned out of your son's body, and he spends the entire summer tracking down a cult and sealing the entity once more. you've left your (thankless) job to become a public defender for people like you, getting nothing for years of work, of doing your duty to bring home a little more for your son, and they won't give you your pension.

your son works himself to the bone for his friends, knowing he can't go to a good school unless he somehow ensures they all succeed. he does everything: perfect grades, every extracurricular, running the student government campaign for his friend, and he's still tracking down another missing girl. he gets dominate monster cast on him by the principal despite doing nothing wrong.

you chat with him in the car, driving to school, and he can't afford a moment of rest. people have been killed following the leads he's tracking, he warns you of the danger of following up and yet he still aims to find the clues.

and you wonder, is this all i've shown him? stretching yourself thin, never more than a moment's rest, and yet others don't appreciate it? after spending your lives in this town, and you're still goblins, still punished for the crime of existence, having to work twice as hard for half the credit.

they call him "the ball".

every day sklonda gukgak wakes up.

[thisisnotthenerd]

thinking about kristen applebees worshiping a goddess of mystery, doubt and the unknown, and what it says about the fact that that faith did not spread during four months of endless night from the night yorb.

thinking about how the world watched as this prophet of multiple gods said “what is your name, you who i praise” and brought cassandra back from the nightmare king.

thinking about what it would take to say, “i know you are afraid and uncertain. i cannot offer you answers, only respite, and the knowledge that you are not alone in the night. the void is vast, but there is something there to seek out.”

thinking about how galicaea benefited not only from tracker’s trip to fallinel, but from having answers in the light of the moon amidst the endless night. about how sol and helio must have felt a loss of faith in the absence of the sun.

thinking about kristen applebees, who tried to pray for years on end to find a reason for why bad things happen to good people, and upon finding a process, felt the paralysis of the unknown.

[thisisnotthenerd]

twilight and dawn

doubt and conviction

mystery and clarity

the quiet of the night and the blaring trumpet sound of the day

you pray to cassandra before you sleep to take respite and ponder in cradle of darkness

and pray to ankarna as you wake for the clarity and impetus to take on the day

using doubt to question what is and is not, and conviction to do something about it

ankarna rides her golden chariot across the sky, heralding the sun and the long day before reuniting with her wife as day gives way to night, where cassandra holds sway, trailing magic in ancient forests where the light does not touch the depths

you bear their names in crucibles, at thresholds; when action must be taken, you have faith in cassandra to venture into the unknown, and faith in ankarna to light the path ahead

even in corruption, in fear of the unknown, and rage against injustice, there is hope that doubt and conviction might carry you through the dark night and into the light of day

[thisisnotthenerd]

the fact that the bad kids have titles is insane in general

but let's talk about fig.

fig, short for figueroth, faeth. i couldn't find an exact meaning for figueroth, so we're looking at faeth first.

[sidenote:

gilear means star over/of the sea

athenriel means garland of healing herbs

hallariel technically means tall daughter

lomenelda means starry twilight

sandra lynn could be a reference to common, meaning protector and lake respectively, or in elvish a reference to pine forest by a lake

i digress]

based on elvish roots, the root fae- can connect to several different meanings: fëa for spirit, faila for fair minded, fána for white and radiant. i would posit that the name faeth likely uses the first meaning.

upon taking her role as the mistress of the bottomless pit, fig creates her title. not borrowing from the legal precedent which would have her be called figueroth the faithless, but figueroth the infaethable.

fig took the name of both of her fathers as part of her title--insatiable from gorthalax and faeth from gilear.

insatiable refers to a greed that cannot be satisfied. faeth refers to the spirit.

the title infaethable, improvised though it might have been, refers to a depth of spirit that cannot be satisfied, not by those things inane and physical, but by that which may be nurtured in the soul and given.

in other words, an endless well of faith.

and is that not who fig is?

[thisisnotthenerd]

god blind me for all i have seen

forgive me my faults and accept my doubts

that i might look upon the corrupted

and choose the hope and plea of restoration

god blind me for all i have said

for words ill-formed and careless thought alike

that i might bring divinity from mundane

and share my love of doubt with all the world

god blind me for all i have borne

for watching as the world comes to its end

that i might seek the wisp of endless hope

and avert calamity with mine own hands

god blind me for all i have done

for taking half lived moments of a full life

that i might live free as my own being

and choose beyond the will of my creators