#daily 10-5 though kinda ass opening hours

[voidstarx]

Anguish, August Friedrich Schenck, National Gallery Victoria

[jtsfavslut]

Falling [G.D]

Description: Just when Y/N thought she was over Grayson, he pops back into her life, making her wonder if you could fall for the same person twice. Inspired by ‘Falling’ - Harry Styles. 

Warnings: None, Just sad stuff lmao!!!

Word Count: 4K+

Also a special thanks to cole [ @blazedgraysons​] for keeping up with my annoying ass questions while I wrote this, and for helping me and giving me advice I love you <333

   Her small feet carried her body down the familiar street, cars zooming past her as her body softly bumped into the others around her. The loud sounds from the environment being blocked away by the soft, yet loud music that was coming out of an old pair of Airpods she had gotten for Christmas back in High School.

This was Y/N's daily routine. Get up early in the morning, do her business in the bathroom, get dressed, and walk over to her favorite cafe. The Beachwood cafe had become Y/N's second home ever since she moved to L.A, spending most of her time there, before and after class.

A smile lit up her face as the familiar blue door came into her view, a content sigh falling past her lips as she got closer to the door.

The strong smell of coffee hit her nostrils as she walked inside, music being paused as she walked fully inside, giving her attention to the cashier that greeted her every morning, "Hi Y/N, your stuff is on your table," she smiled up at Y/N before pointing towards her usual table.

It was the one by the window in the corner of the shop, the bright yellow and blue floor illuminated her small journey to the table, where her coffee and breakfast sandwich happily waited for her to approach. She sat down, hand reaching into her Yellow Kanken backpack, another Christmas gift from high school that she dearly took care of, she pulled out a brown journal and a pen.

A journal filled with memories and random thoughts that popped in her head. Y/N thought writing things down was good for the mind and body. She believed that writing things down would help you keep your thoughts safely, and lock memories into place without overworking your mind. A pen that has been through many journeys on the same yet different page.

All pages were the same until the pen went over it, recording things until the end of time. They were all the same until she wrote down her thoughts for the day.

Her small hand gripped onto the pen as she wrote down her thoughts from the previous night, coffee cup in the other hand as she slowly sipped the liquid.

Last night I thought of him again, just until I drifted off. I don't know why. It hasn't happened in months. Nothing bad, just a memoir of all of our memories together. Like the time we broke into the school's pool one night. Where he pushed me in with all my clothes on, then he jumped in and we made out by the stairs. Funny how we never got caught since cameras were around us. Or when we had our senior trips to the mountains in Colorado, and how he kept sneaking into the girls' room just to be with me. We were lucky we didn't get caught again. I tried to not keep thinking about him. I know it's time to finally drop it and move on, but how? How do I erase all those memories from my brain? How am I supposed to just drop it and move along? Just how? I don't need or want to know why just how.

She softly slammed the notebook closed, right before she could feel a slight burning in her eyes and a rock starting to form in her throat. The subject of her and a past lover that she was still holding onto, still being a deep wound to her.

She thought about and remembered Grayson every day. After all, he was her everything during her entire High School life, and he still was…...sort of.  Grayson and Y/N started dating in the 9th grade, right about in the middle of the year. He asked her out behind the school's bleachers during lunchtime, a mixture of flowers from his mom's garden that she shyly accepted from him after she said yes. That was followed by their date to the movie theater, where he held her close to him every time she faked being a little scared, not that he could tell, and three dates after he officially asked her out where she said yes again, and that was followed by an accidental kiss, he was leaning towards her cheek when she accidentally moved her head to the side, causing his lips to land on hers. Neither of them complained, just smiled at each other and carried on.

They went on for 6 years, all of high school and two college years, where he decided to break it off because of distance. He went off on how being across the country from one another was hard, and the fact that the time difference from New York to California was 3 and 4. She didn't complain. Didn't give a reason as to why not, even if she had trillions of them. She didn't try to change his mind. She simply said okay, and wished him the best. She still loved him though.

The words that her grandpa had spoken replayed in her brain every time she questioned why she still thought about him; "You never stop loving anyone sugar, you just kinda love someone stronger. If you stop loving them, then you never loved them to begin with" She thought about that, and that made her feel better. Maybe there was someone out there who she would love more than she loved Grayson.

With a quiet sigh, she put her journal away, switching it with a book she picked up at the library a few days prior, yet read a million times.

To Kill A Mockingbird is a book she read many times in school, mostly everyone has. It's the one book from school she actually enjoyed, so she picked it up from the book shop down the street from her apartment before work one day, and didn't get to read it until now.

She opened the book with a small smile, the sensation of the book against her finger bringing nothing but happiness to her, and took her mind off whatever was bothering her. She lost herself in the book, almost done with half of the book before her alarm rang, signaling it was time for work. She left a 20 on the table after putting all her stuff away in her backpack and walking out of the shop and towards her job which was a paid internship at a local hospital downtown, all she did was watch and help out with minor cases like cuts, sprains, X Ray's and the occasional stuff like questioning. She entered the hospital, sanitizing herself and changing into her uniform, walking over to her area, that being the Pediatrics Emergency room where her boss, mentor, whatever you might want to call him, Dr. Reyez, and the rest of the team were waiting for her.

"Morning everyone," she chirped at the tired yet awake health care workers, who all had smiles on their faces. "Morning Y/N, you're going to be practicing by yourself today, can you handle it?" Dr. Reyez asked her, which she just nodded her head with a smile. There wasn't a single ounce of doubt in her brain.

"I'm pretty sure yes! And I can just reach out to you guys if anything, right?"

"Yeah, just page us if anything. Your first patient should be here soon, just go wait by the desk," Reyez instructed her and that's exactly what she did. She sat on the desk for over 20 minutes until someone came in with a toddler covered in rashes.

"Hi baby, I just need to ask you and mommy a few questions, yeah?" She sweetly and patiently asked the 5 year old as his mom was filling out some papers, to which he just nodded his head.

"Okay, Xavion, did you eat something new today? Maybe something you've never eaten?" She asked and both the mom and son nodded their heads.

"Do you think he was allergic to something?" The mom asked, causing Y/N to shrug.

"Well, it depends. We need to get an allergy test for him. It doesn't hurt or anything, we just scratch and pour a drop of the allergen over it and see how they react. Mom, do you happen to remember what he ate today for the first time?" She replied by recording some notes down on her clipboard before telling a nurse to get an Allergy Antibody Test ready.

"He ate everything that he usually does except for some broccoli I gave him," the mom replied and Y/N nodded her head before writing it down on her clipboard and walking them to the testing room.

Once the results came back around half an hour later, Xavion was, in fact, allergic to broccoli, and other things that Y/N had to explain to the mother. She got about 15 minutes of break time before Reyez called her another minor emergency.

"It's an 11 year old, possible breakage or sprain to the leg, you can handle this one right?" He asked and she nodded her head, "Good, they're in room 217, good luck," he added before sending her off to the room.

She quickly made her way over to it, grabbing her clipboard on the way, "Hi, I'm Dr.Y/LN, I'm going to be taking care of you guys today! May I have the child's name and date of birth please?" She nicely asked as she walked inside the room, quickly walking over to the desk area that was in the corner and placing her stuff down.

"Uhhh, Caleb Dolan, August 17, 2008," a deep voice that she could recognize from anywhere spoke as she turned around. Her heart dropped at the sight of Grayson in front of her. She tried to reassemble herself, after all, she couldn't make any mistakes right now, Reyez was trusting her and she couldn't afford to mess the opportunity up.

"Caleb, August 17, 2008," she mumbled as she wrote it down on her piece of paper, "Caleb, do you mind telling me what happened, babe?" She asked with a smile on her face. Her smile turned into a small frown as she looked up at the boy who happened to be in pain.

"Me and uncle Gray were practicing for the soccer game that's next and I fell on the mud and hit my leg really hard," he explained as she walked towards him nodding her head.

"On a scale of 1 to 10, One being okay while 10 being the worst, how would you rate the pain?" She asked, walking over to the walk to grab a pair of gloves, putting them on, and walking back towards him.

"Uhh a seven," he replied and she nodded her head.

"Okay Caleb, just know this might hurt a little okay? It's just protocol to check if it's dislocated, broken, or sprained okay?" She asked and he nodded his head, a few tears falling down his face from fear. Grayson quickly leaned down to wipe off his face whispering a quiet 'you'll be okay' as Caleb grabbed his hand.

"Can you try and move your ankle for me? Just try and move it," she explained and he muttered at quiet yes before moving his foot in a slow circle, she nodded her head before placing both hands over his ankle checking for any bumps, which there were none to find, "Luckily for you Caleb, it's just sprained! There are no bumps meaning it's not dislocated, and you can move it meaning it's not fractured! Just to make sure, we're going to need an X Ray' just to make sure there are no hidden surprises yeah? Dr. Lindsey will do those with you, and I'll be right here when you come back," she smiled up at the boy before Dr. Lindey moved him to a wheelchair and took him to the X Ray room, leaving Y/N and Grayson alone in painful silence.

"So this is what you do? This is where you work?" Grayson was the first to speak after a couple of quiet seconds,

She cleared her throat and nodded her head, placing her hands inside her white jacket, "Yeah. It's a paid internship so it's basically a job, what about you? What are you doing here?" She asked to make direct eye contact with him.

"Moved here after me and E graduated, looking for some roles and an agent," he spoke, his voice not as deep yet shakier than when he first spoke.

"Any luck with that?"

"Yeah. We've landed a few small roles here and there," he answered and she just nodded her head.

"That's good! I'm glad everything's working out for you," She gave him a genuine smile before continuing to fill out Caleb's paperwork.

"Listen, I know it's been 2 years but-," Grayson began to speak before Y/N cut him off. "-Grayson just don't. I'm at work right now, and it's enough seeing you after 2 years, but I don't really need this right now. I'm sorry," She apologized before leaving the room to get some papers before walking back in, thankfully Caleb was already in the room when she walked in.

"I'm going to wrap your ankle up with this and then you're good to go, buddy. Make sure you don't apply pressure on it for two weeks. And carefully when you're playing any sport, I don't want you back here," she said while wrapping his ankle up carefully. She gave Grayson the discharge papers, their hands touching each other for a split second before she pulled away waving them off before walking to where her team was.

"That guy was looking at you intensely," Reyez pointed out, earning a glare from her.

"Don't even start," she rolled her eyes before taking a sip from her water bottle that was on her desk.

"Wait is that the?" Jacob, one of the nurses, asked and she nodded her head.

"Yeah, that's him," she sighed, shaking her head.

"Holly shit Y/N, I knew you said he was hot, but girl? That man is hotter than-,"

"Mackenzie, don't you dare," Y/N joked towards her other co-worker, "God why do you do this to me? I was almost over him and then you put him on my path again? The universe hates me,"

"I'd go for it again if I were you," Mackenzie encouraged earning a glare from her.

"Alright, leave her alone before she starts to crumble, Mackenzie go fill out reports, Y/N go take a breather," Reyez ordered them around and they all nodded their heads, going on their way to do what they were told.

. . .

Soft snores began to quietly run past her lips as she drifted off to sleep, all before a feeling of suddenly falling down an empty whole woke her up. She shook her head letting out a quiet 'fuck' before turning to look towards the clocks on her nightstand, 3:30 AM being brightly displayed on it. Y/N let out a loud sigh, knowing she wouldn't be going back to sleep anytime soon.

Her mind suddenly clouded with knotted thoughts and notions, too many of them just to focus on a single one. She pushed her body up, just enough for her to reach over and grab the small yellow backpack that she lazily threw on the floor, pulling her journal and pen out before throwing it back on the floor.

She clicked the pen and opened the journal, blank pages waiting to be filled up, her hand delicately moved along the paper as she scribbled letters and words on the empty pages, thoughts clearing out of her head, one by one.

I saw him today. He looked different. He's grown. After it all, it has been two years. His voice is deeper too. He wanted to talk, but I said no. Maybe if I did, I would fall for him again, or something. I'm doing just fine, so why did he have to move here. Anyway, Reyez finally allowed me to take care of patients by myself today. It was fun, I liked it, I guess. Luckily I'm free tomorrow because I can't sleep at all now. Maybe it's the repeating thoughts of him running through my mind, or just simply the lack of melatonin in my body right now. I'll probably go to the park tomorrow, stop at the cafe first then make my way there, but anyway, I'm going to try and sleep now.

It was a quick entry, nothing special, just her major thoughts being written down, just enough for her to feel better. She got up from the bed walking over to the kitchen grabbing a water bottle before leaning against the counter and sipping it. She crossed her bare legs over each other, looking out of the big window in her living room. Her favorite part about the apartment? It was the window that looked down on bright LA city. Y/N could sit there for hours and not notice the time pass by, she knows this because it happened before. She left the kitchen and walked towards the window, propping her body down on the small couch she had in front of the window. She laid her head on her hand, watching the few cars that sped down the street, the small yet bright red lights disappearing into the distance as her eyes followed them until they could.

Her eyes softly closed as she laid down on the couch, drifting off into another universe. The next morning she woke up at around 8 AM, doing her daily routine, except she stopped at the Cafe, picked her things up, and made her way to the park. It was an old park, there was an old playground that seemed like it hadn't been used in years. She sat down on an old bench drinking her coffee as she watched the scenery.

She didn't take her notebook out, her mind not having any thoughts, or at least no thoughts relevant enough for her to write down. She just took her time to take her surroundings in. She admired how the wind moved the trees, yet they were so strong they didn't crack. The way the birds lifted off whatever surface they were, and drifted off into the sky. She admired the rare butterflies that randomly appeared just to disappear once again. She simply admired the earth, something that she didn't do quite often; Always being too deep in her thoughts to actually study the things around her.

"They're beautiful aren't they?" Grayson's voice spoke out of nowhere, making Y/N do a slight jump in her seat as her heart raced.

She brought her hand up to her chest, a sigh falling past her lips as she glared at Grayson who was chuckling, "You fucking scared me,"

"Sorry," he sighed, sitting down next to her.

They both let out sighs. Both knowing that there was no escaping the conversation that was about to happen, a conversation that was long due.

"You could, hmm, you could go first," she spoke after a few moments of silence, throat dried making her clear it in the middle of some of her words.

"I'm sorry about yesterday. You were working, and Ummm, it wasn't the right place or time to talk about things. I'm also sorry because I never gave you an explanation as to why we should've broken up. After all, you didn't ask anyway," He softly spoke. He thought every word through, studied each meaning before letting them run past his lips.

"I didn't ask because it's what you wanted. Your decision was clearly made. I mean, I don't think breaking up with someone is a spontaneous thought is it? Your decision was made, and if you felt like I was holding you back, then I had to let you go, if I loved you, then I think I did the right thing." Her words were careful too. And quiet, so quiet feeling that if she spoke too loud the things around her would break.

"I didn't want to break up. I felt like it was the right thing to do, you know? We were always so busy, and we made time for each other, but it was exhausting. And when you were out with friends, I felt like I was annoying you or something," he sighed and she shook her head, the thought of her ever getting annoyed at Grayson's presence being absurd.

"Oh God absolutely not," she chuckled, "I thought I was annoying you. Like I wondered if you talked about me, or not. I wanted to know if I annoyed you because I felt like I did,"

It was true. In her journal, multiple pages were filled out with her question herself on whether Grayson talked about her or not. Even after the breakup, she wondered if he'll ever need her. Most pages were about him, all of her thoughts revolved around him, always.

"I did. All the time, to the point where I said your name subconsciously," he smiled, remembering the conversations he had with his friends about her, and how great she was.

"I did too, well not say but write," she sighed, leaning her back on the bench.

"You wrote about me?"

"Grayson you know I did, that's a dumb question," She shook her head, taking a sip of the coffee that was somehow still warm.

"Do you still write about me?" He asked and she stayed quiet, not knowing whether she should answer truthfully or not.

"Honestly speaking, I do. I write about everything that comes to mind, so sometimes? Yeah," she sighed, knowing that it would be easier if they just told the truth.

Maybe this was the closure that they both needed, yet never got. Maybe this was going to help her fully move on from him, and have thoughts that don't include her.

Or maybe not. Maybe this would help them reconnect. Y/N left it all up to the universe. She was a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, and that you can't change your future since it's already written about. When she got home after a couple of hours she took a shower, lit on her favorite candles, and did the expected. She took out her notebook and wrote.

We spoke today. He told me the reason why we broke up. It wasn't an intentional meeting though, I was just admiring nature. I was looking at the butterflies I think. He randomly spoke. And I know it was long due and needed so I just told him to say it. It's better to just get it over with than to just keep pushing it back, I think. He told me why he wanted to break up, which right now, sounds like a valid reason. I just wonder why he didn't just say it back then. It would've saved me a lot of nights, don't you think? He now knows I write about him, and where I go to write about him. Maybe I shouldn't go there anymore. It sounds out of this world I know. But maybe, just maybe, I should just close that chapter in my life.

There are just too many memories of him at Beachwood. That's where he surprised me the first time he came to visit. And it's where I write about him the most. I could find another cafe near here, there's plenty.

I just wonder if we're ever going to see each other again. If I'll ever fall for him again, if that is even possible. Because I don't think you could fall for the same person twice, right?

That was the last page in her journal. All the pages filled with her delicate letters, her writing being eternal. Filled with on-going words until the end, where an unanswered question laid. The weight that was once on her shoulders began to fade, and for once in her life, the thought of her future no longer made her afraid.

 This is the first time I’m proud of a something I wrote, so if this flops, I will deactivate! Just kidding, sort of. Anyways, yeah, I feel like my writing has improved, and as always, if you have any tips, and/or constructive critism, please, please, please drop them in my inbox, and don’t worry, I won’t say your hurting my feelings lmfao!! 

Tag List:   @guiltydols @evergreendolan @ydolanssss @rhyrhy462 @resilientdolan @simplyxdolxstyles @simplyxdolxstyles​ {If you wanna be added to my Tag List, just let me know :) lol}

[siren-virus]

There's some stuff that has been going around in my head regarding Luckuboy!AU, so I'll just dump everything here and see how you might adapt/change/evolve some of these ideas, or don't use any of them since that's perfectly valid too and it's your au, not mine :3 anyways, this is a long idea that can be divided, so I'll do just that and make a paragraph for each sub-idea.

1) Ben's daily schedule: Ben most likely has a morning schedule in the coffee shop, and as such he would get to work early, now idk how they work, but I imagine Ben's day to day life would go something like this: Ben's alarm goes off at 7:00, he wakes up and leaves bed at 7:15, breakfast and shower before arriving at work at 8:00 (do shops open at 8:00? 8:30? idk :V), keep working until 16:00 with lunchtime tucked in the middle, hang out with friends/relax/naps until 20:00, start his own vigilante work until 2:00, where he goes to sleep and repeats. If his patrol is slow then he would go home earlier to sleep more, if it's hectic and he doesn't get enough sleep, then the afternoon/evening would be used in powernaps.

2) Ben the info brooker, I imagine that Ben would eventually get to know a lot, and I mean A LOT, of information about everyone and everything important that's going on in Undertown (which, considering the situation of Earth and the Plumbers, is probably the only alien world center, would be everything), and when he hears of someone having some kind of trouble, he gives them a nudge in a certain direction for them. Eventually word gets out that there's a new information brooker in town that has scarily accurate info, he works at a coffee shop and you better give him a big tip if you don't want some of your info to get out fast (how real this info is nobody knows, and since Ben hasn't heard of it he can't correct them)

2.5) One day Argit appears and asks for a coffee under a different name, when it's ready Ben calls for him (he used a fake name) and writes with an alcohol marker on the cup "Argit", scaring the hell out of him. "How did you know?" "I'd be shitty at what I do if I couldn't recognize you *wink*", then he tells him that as long as they do nothing dangerous near him he won't tattle him and Kevin to the Plumbers, or worse, Gwen. "Don't you dare" says Argit aghast, "Try me bitch" answers Ben grinning, almost double daring him into doing something dangerous only so he can call his cousin and set up a date

3) The coffee made in the shop is delicious, caters to every species needs, alergies, likes and dislikes, and everyone agrees that the place is the best of the best in the whole world for these reasons and more; thus the shop has been a tentative neutral zone for years, however the lack of "people" (idk what word to use that captures everyone, human or alien) that knows how to fight there has severly dampened the opportunity of it becoming one. Cue Ben beggining to work there, in the beggining it's nothing special, he's just a human who makes good coffee and is surprisingly charming, come a few weeks and months and everyone starts noticing how he's the infamous information brooker that has been the talk of Undertown, thus gathering a bit more attention. Eventually someone (Plumber, civilian, villain, whatever you choose) is more rude to him than needed and tries to get some info from him, even if it's by force... Ben decks him, like, he kicks their ass, defenestrates them, break a chair on them and hands them unconcious to the closest Plumber, bleeding and all while still being intact himself. Everyone glares in awe at the show of badassery and oficially the coffee shop becomes the new true neutral zone, where everyone can get coffee, exchange information and form unlikely friendships. Whenever someone tries to mess with the shop, if Ben isn't present, is busy or it's too much for him, everyone else, Plumber, villain and civilian joins him in defending the shop and getting rid of the nuisancess that mess with the shop.

4) With all the info that Ben gets both as a barista and as a vigilante, one would think that he would give everything out as long as you paid the prize, but surprisingly he has a strong code that he never breaks. If he EVER learns that a piece of information he has with himself is considered confidential, then he'll never speak about it with anyone, no matter how much they offer to pay him. He can't answer for the ones who talks about this info in the shop without saying in any moment that the info is supposed to be confidential, he can't read minds, but everyone catches on fast on this, and some say the keyword when talking in the coffee shop. However many still forget about it once in a while, since the calm atmosphere of the shop is too powerful and slip up often happen. Still Ben can't be blamed, how is he supposed to know if some piece of info is confidential if no one ever says it is? Again, he's not a mindreader nor a telepath.

5) Any info on his vigilante persona he never gives out, however it's not because of not wanting to give out any of that info, but rather because another part of his code is "If I haven't heard people talk about something, then I don't know information about it. All my info is second hand, so unless someone else already knows about it, I won't know about it". That can come in very handy considering the surprisingly little info there is about his vigilante persona out there, despite how famous he kinda is. This more often than not drives Jimmy mad.

Love brainstorms, hate the alien.

1) Most cafes open at 7am from my knowledge, 9am if you're in a sleepy town, so it'd be more like a 6am wake up, optional breakfast- (who eats breakfast these days?), straight to the cafe around 7ish to help with cleaning and setting up for the day.

This cafe is more of a 24/7 place. With 24/7 breakfast! (don't you hate it when places stop doing breakfast at a certain hour?)

Apart from that love what ya got there.

As for the vigilante side, he starts whenever is easiest, it's all dependent if things are hectic or not. Sun goes down roughly 7PM (pretty late I know, but where I live (during summer at least), sun won't go down til 9PM). Sometimes he finishes at 2AM, sometimes a few minutes before work (Incoming animatic!)

2) Love everything about that too! I'd like to think Ben has no idea about it at first, he just notices some days the tip jar is fuller than others. He chocks it up to his charming personality. But eventually he catches on.

Another thing to add, at some point if people wanted to get info from Ben they'd order a "whipped caramel latte with icing sugar, honey, and salt" (gross) Ben has no idea of this, but the weird amount of customers ordering that and asking for intel, kinda makes him think about it.

2.5) This!! good shit right here! Except, you can't call a customer a bitch, trust me... Karen's and Kevin's exist in all shapes, sizes and forms. So Ben uses the kill them with kindness, customer service attitude.

Additionally, sometimes Kevin, although rarely, comes by, hovers around the counter. He'll order a coffee and glare at Ben until, he gets his attention.

"You staring at me for a reason?"

"I need to know about Gwen 10."

Of course, at this Ben would grin devilishly and respond with, "Oh, you wanna take her on date? She loves sappy romance movies, she's also a nerd, so get her a math book instead of flowers."

That always shuts Kevin up, makes him leave most occasions.

3) Everything about this is just!!! Love it. Wouldn't change a thing.

4) Yes yes!!Sometimes, a customer will demand classified info (those that aren't initiated to how the cafe works). When Ben refuses to squawk this can lead to some shouting from a customer sometimes, which leads to a coworker, or a regular shoeing the nasty customer away. Ben can hold his own against most people, as a human, but sometimes they're just a little too big or a little too tough to be able to defend himself against.

5) I like that a lot too.

I also like to think that sometimes, if Ben wants to mess with someone, especially Jimmy. He'll slip a piece of information out that no one else knows.

"I heard from a plumber, that the vigilante guy likes smoothies- specifically [insert favourite smoothie flavour of the week]"

Cue Jimmy buying several of that smoothie to try and lure Luckyboy (still haven't thought of a namee!!!) out. It works, and Ben gets free smoothies almost every week.

This could backfire immensely though.

Woo, sorry about the delay there, been working a few shifts. Work is kicking my ass as usual...

[tellywoodtrash]

immj2 19.04.21 lb

here's what you "missed" (lbr tho, not watching tellywood is not called MISSING, it's called "FREEDOM") last week on this shitshow:

kabir pehla mauka dekh ke vatttt liya. #livefree my love.

kiara died the most inglorious death - forcefed a peanut butter milkshake.

riddhima as per usual, the moment someone drops dead in their vicinity, turned to vansh and was like:

ghar mein saaaaare 90s bachche start playing CID-CID. kaabil detectives watching this bs like......

besttttt part is that none of these dumbasses are ANYYYYYYYYYY closer to opening the damn black box than they were 2 weeks ago.

meanwhile someone keeps threatening riddhima ki they're gonna tell vansh the whole 6 hours secret. ho hum. sansaaaar ko khatam ho jaana hai lekin yeh manhoos raaz nahi khulna.

aslkdjaslkdjlsakjdlaskjd anu mom and her new-found spirituality and daily meditation is actually sending me.

mummyji being super helpful and telling riddhima ki dadi has the torch now. love how the whollllllle family is just playing passing the parcel with this thing, getting their grubby fingerprints all over it, as if it's NOT A VALUABLE PIECE OF EVIDENCE IN A MURDER.

dadi meanwhile is burning a hole in her phone screen staring at kiara's tattoo. bachchon se leke buddhon tak sabne isko ghoora hai, lekin majaal hai, inmein se ek ko bhi kuch samajh aaya ho. why can't y'all just accept that maybe it means nothing, it's just one of those dumb foreign language tattoos, that probably say "ek plate gobi manchurian" or some shit.

riddhima's here asking for the torch and dadi is just like BHAKKKKK NIKAL YAHAAN SE while having flashbacks to brandishing the mashaal like some crazyass charlotesville nazi.

another flower delivery for riddhima that vansh is receiving at the door, and sis loses it. runs like PT USHA and grabs the flowers and note outta his hand thinking it's another threat and tears it up.

vansh here like:

but also she cut her hand so ofc he's using mauka to suck on her finger. MAN IN THESE CORONA TIMES, Y'ALL REALLY KILLING ME WITH THIS GANDAAAAAA NON HYGENIC BEHAVIOURRRR.

lmao the bouquet was from vansh, as an apology (for what? no like, we've lost count of all the shit you do on an hourly basis, so which exact thing are you saying sorry for right now????)

also what adbhut new way of being pregnant is this that the immj2 ladies have cracked, ki inka itnaaaaaa se bhi pait nahi nikalta????

anyway, some blah blah cutesy romance bakchodi that no one has time for. i liked it better when y'all were constantly horny.

angre as usual here with some manhoos khabar that has vansh frowning and storming away.

police aayi hai. excuse you, we don't recognize any cops here but our one and only KABIR. HAIN KAHAN HUMAARA LADKA??? MISSING HO RAHI HAI YAAR?!?!!!? KYUN LAGA RAKHA HAI FALTU KA YEH SHOW WITHOUT THE BEST CHARACTER THAT EXISTS IN IT?

anyway police is like we heard there was a murder here, and vansh is like huh whaaa here no??? no dead ppl here, no sir. you may leave. police waale bhaiyya is like bhak chutiye, aise thodi hota hai, warrant laaye hain, hatt saamne se.

angre taking out a rolled up carpet, a trick outta the vihaan book. but it's too small to have anything rolled up in it, so.......

doesn't stop the police from making a big deal of searching it though, while vansh side mein se taane maarta hai. waise bhai kaaafi good mood mein hai aaj kal. looks like someone's been taking their meds these days.

riddhima just randomly falling down behind them. like..... ???????

this police is literally too dumb to function. THEY CAME WITH A WARRANT TO SEARCH THE WHOLE HOUSE, JUST LOOKED INSIDE THIS ONE ROLLED CARPET (THAT TOO AFTER GETTING DISTRACTED BY RIDDHIMA'S RANDOM GIRRNA) AND WERE LIKE OK DONE THERE'S NOTHING HERE BYE. LMAO WHAT THE HELL, MY CAT PLAYS HIDE AND SEEK WITH MORE FOCUS AND PURPOSE THAN THIS.

husband wife and anu mom giggling over how riansh ke do takke ka pyaar is enough to chutiya banaofy everyone. kya hi bakwaaas.

the slightest of movement and vansh is dizzy. lol is he severely anemic like me???? join the club, bitch. we have iron supplements.

oh boy, cut to a while later and bro don't look too good. he's still smiling at riddhima's banter and all, but.......... idk man, he looks like he's having a daura of some sort.

riddhima's amazing medical knowledge (or just plain common sense???) finally kicks in and she's like, u ok dude? imma call a doc. and he's like nooooooo i'm fiiiiiiiiiiiine. ok whatever. maro apne iss stupid secret container room office mein. bewakoof.

ISKE BEECH MEIN BHI ROMANCE. BHAAD MEIN JAO YAAR TUM LOG.

asldkjaslkdjlaskdjlaskdj angre ne laash ko vyom ke ghar rakh diya. as if there aren't enough creepy things lying around in there in the first place.

ok vansh seems to be getting real breathless and sickly.

meanwhile idhar angre is doing some kinda depraved play with kiara's laash and........... man everyone in this show is a fucking psychopath.

also it's now been like 3, 4 days since the chick died and ..................... body's not smelling ripe yet?

vansh coughing his way through opening that stupid orange coloured black box and.......... abbe chutiye, zinda rahoge toh khol paoge?????????

anyway the tattoo code whatever only has 5 digits and he needs 6 and meanwhile anu mom has come yelling about how siya's gone missing. great. ek pallllllll ka chain nahi is pagal-khaane mein.

find some letter in her room. vansh's coughing is getting worse and worse. bro, time to get a covid test.

at least siya was helpful enough to tell everyone she's going to saste!bhaiyya.

asli bhaiyya is understandably very very upset. and thus coughing and huffing puffing even more. SOMEONE TAKE THIS DUDE TO A DOCTOR THIS IS GETTING DISTRESSING TO WATCH OML.

anu mom toh is full-on ignoring vansh actively dying in front of her rn and is like OH GOD SIYA KAHIN KOI "NAADAAANI" MEIN ZINDAGI KHARAAB NAA KAR BAITHE (meaning: OMG VIRGINITY KHATRE MEIN HAIIIIII!!!!!!!!)

riddhima is like dude you're not fucking ok and he's still like I'M FINE I'M JUST WORRIED FOR SIYA. idk man i'd be more worried about your obviously failing phepdein and dil than your sister's hymen, but that's just me i guess.

riddhima is calling vyom and threatening him, and nothing gets vyom hornier than being threatened, so ofc, bhai mood mein hai.

vyom, unlike all other tellywood baddies (and even goodies), is a big believer in consent. good on him. 10 points to him over every other chutiya man in this show.

he's informing her about how vansh thikaane lagaofied the laash at his place. oufffffff, y'all need to respect poor dead kiara instead of just shuffling her body back and forth like this. uski aatma tum logon ke upar mandaraaayegi, dekhna.

riddhima's like idc about all this i just want siya to be safe and he's like too late babe. sardi, khaasi, na malaria hua; humko love love love loveriaaaaa huaaaa.

vyom's like siya aayi apni marzi se hai, par jaayegi meri marzi se. guess he don't believe in consent so much anymore. (revokes the 10 points i gave hm earlier. also taking away 50 points for this uglyass suit. bhai tu shirt utar, wohi behtar hai.)

vansh has now progressed to coughing like the people from the pre-movie anti-tobacco ads now.

hides the orange black box in yet another secret room hidden behind some panel, where all the raisinghania wealth is hoarded like pirate's booty in all these crates. y'all crazy, its 2021, put that shit in offshore bank accounts you dumbasses.

anyway he tells angre all this shit kaafi detail mein, and lord idk how angre ke neeyat doesn't phisalofy to just off this fucker and take over the whole thing himself. zero ambition this boy has. ishani hoti isske jagah, toh pakka karti. precap: riddhima trying to console vansh about siya; vyom being a creepy ass monologuing loser as per usual; vansh pays a visit to vyom exuding hella lotta sexy energy.

[petri808]

Happy Halloween!

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 22 | 23 | 24 | 25

*Bonus Halloween chapter* it’s longer than normal (2k)

The biggest party in Tokyo was for a western holiday called Halloween, and the streets surrounding the heart of Shibuya that Saturday were literally crawling with a million young adults in every kind of costume you could imagine! Most of the revelers had no idea as to the origins of this holiday. All they cared about was dressing up and having a good time, including Lucy and her friends who’d dressed up as their favorite manga characters from Eden’s Zero. The businesses lining the streets in the area were used to the onslaught and welcomed it because it meant a nice chunk of revenue, while authorities did their best to control the crowds.

The group started off with Lucy, Levy, Erza, Gajeel, and Gray, but over time as others showed up or they ran into more friends, the groups numbers ebbed and flowed. Gray was the first to take off to meet his girlfriend Juvia, and once Natsu was off of work and joined them, Lucy and he split off to cruise by themselves for a while.

“Wow it’s so eerie how much you guys look like Shiki and Rebecca!”

“Thanks Mira,” Lucy blushes.

“Tch, I may look like the guy, but I’m not as dopey as him,” Natsu retorts. “He’s taking too damn long to make it official with Rebecca.”

“Don’t mind him,” Lucy giggles, “Natsu ships Shicca hard. But it’s even funnier to watch him and Gray argue over Weiszmura.”

“That’s because Gray is a blind bat who won’t admit they match!”

“Okay,” Mira laughs, “put the canons away. Are you two gonna check out the BUMP party at Womb nightclub?”

“Maybe a little later.” Lucy answers for them. “I heard they had some decent bands this year, but I’d rather go somewhere a little smaller like Sonidos.”

“Oh, yeah? Lisanna’s boyfriend Bixlow is the DJ there tonight.”

Lucy looks to Natsu, “we definitely should stop by and say hi.”

“Agreed.”

“Well it was nice bumping into you. I need to meet up with Laxus so you two have fun! I’ll catch you later!” Mira waves as she rejoins the flood of passerby’s.

Natsu takes Lucy’s hand and the couple continued walking around with no real destination. They stop in open stores to browse or grab yummy-looking finger foods from street vendors along the way. Despite the chaos around them, this was turning into a nice reprieve from their daily lives. It was already 1 am, but from the amount of activity going on, it was easy to lose track of time.

“Look, look,” Lucy points while dragging Natsu with her. “Photo booth!”

“Aww, really?” He whines, though the smile never wavered on his face.

“Yup!” She pulls him in and fishes out a bill from her wallet for the machine.

“Chi-zu!”

The pair chuckle and pose for the five shutter clicks. Each pose varying until the last one ending with a kiss from Natsu and genuinely surprised expression on Lucy’s face. It wasn’t their first kiss, but this would be a memorable one. For a few seconds as the machine printed out the slip of photos, Natsu holds her gaze, sweeping his thumb gently along her flushed cheek. There was a sense of intimacy in these confined booths where many a couple had hidden away from the public for this very kind of very moment.

“Thank you,” he smiles, eyes soft and pure of appreciation.

“For what?” Genuinely unsure of the reason.

“Giving me a second chance. These past few months have been the happiest times of my life and it’s all thanks to meeting you on that train.”

“I’m really glad too,” Lucy smiles sweetly. “Really... really glad,” she breathes out as she moves in to kiss him again.

“Excuse me?” A loud knocking sound stops them. “There’s other people waiting to use the machine!”

“Whoops. To be continued,” she gives Natsu just a quick peck and the pair get out of the booth. They apologize to the next group in line and race off hand in hand, laughing. That had been exhilarating!

Lucy’s heart was still racing even though they were long gone from the photo booth. She and Natsu had been taking things extra slow because of her earlier concerns. Aside from dates and a few kisses here and there, they’d never gone much further and she wondered who was the one holding back. Was it really her or was it actually him because he was too nervous to lose her? Tonight... in that booth... if they weren’t in public... her body flushes wildly just from the thought of it. Okay, so maybe she’s been dying to take their relationship further. Maybe not sex— yet, soon, or maybe... ‘argh! Not now!’ Lucy scolds her libido. But a make out session was a very tempting idea!

They check out Lisanna and Bixlow for a short time at Sonidos, before briefly hooking back up with Levy and Gajeel for some crepes. That’s when Levy quietly informs Lucy that she’ll be crashing at her boyfriend’s house instead of going back to the dorm. “You know... for some privacy,” the girl winks at Lucy. “Hint. Hint!”

“I-It’s too soon for that! W-with us,” her tips burn with lies through each syllable.

“Pfft, you can’t lie that you’ve never thought about it.”

“No... not all the way...”

“Uh-huh. Well, do whatever,” she winks a second time and stands up to leave. “See ya in tomorrow night.”

“Yeah. See ya.”

“Why are your ears all red?” Natsu asks Lucy.

Lucy stiffens up. “N-Nothing important.”

“Oh... okay,” he smiles. “So whatdya wanna do next?”

“Actually, I’m kinda getting tired already.” It was after 3 am and they’d been out and on their feet for over seven hours.

Natsu sighs relief. “Me too! I just didn’t wanna ruin your fun. Shall I take you home?” He squeezes her hand with a smile.

“Yes,” she returns the squeeze, “and if you’d like you can spend the night— I-I mean since you’re tired and all! I’d just feel better than making you back track.”

“I’ll behave, I promise.”

The couple ride the train the short distance between Shibuya and Shinjuku to where Lucy’s dorm is located, cautious of the other riders on the train. Even though alcohol is not allowed on the streets during Halloween, it didn’t stop people from getting drunk and few creepy peepers kept looking at Lucy. But luckily, the train wasn’t very packed despite the holiday because the Shibuya party wasn’t over till 4am and they beat the end rush. On the way, Natsu texts his roommate out of courtesy, only to find out that Gray and Juvia were already at the apartment. Figures. Well it was a good thing he wasn’t walking into that situation! Even if nothing happened, just watching Juvia fawning all over Gray wouldn’t have been appealing. Once they arrive at the dorms, they make sure no one had followed and proceed inside.

Lucy leaves Natsu in the small living room as she changes out of her costume and into something a lot more comfortable. He was lucky the men’s costume was still semi-normal and he only had to remove the jacket and goggles for comfort, but the black hair dye will wash out in a week. She then grabs them a couple bottles of melon milk tea before joining him on the couch. Thank goodness, they didn’t have school, or he didn’t work the next day.

“That was fun,” Lucy curls against his arm with a yawn. “So, tiring though.”

“I haven’t been to Shibuya’s party in a couple of years, but it sure hasn’t changed,” Natsu chuckles. He leans his head against hers while threading their fingers together. “Totally agree on being tired. It probably wouldn’t be as bad if I hadn’t worked too.”

A companionable silence falls over the couple for a few minutes and after some time Natsu assumed Lucy had fallen asleep resting on his shoulder. He would have stayed in that position till his ass was numb if it kept her relaxed. This beauty queen deserved it and more, and he meant every word he’d told her earlier. The second chance had become a cosmic wish come true and he’d be damned to let anything ruin this between them.

“Hey Natsu?”

“Yeah Luce?”

“Do you think we could pick up from where we left off... in that photo booth?”

He swallows hard. It was one thing in the heat of the moment, but quite another to put aside his nerves now that they were so relaxed. This was a different kind of intimacy and much more intimidating to say the least. A private apartment without anything or anyone to interrupt or stop two consenting adults from going too far... and the last thing he wanted to do was something wrong! A regretted decision would destroy everything built up until that moment. But he couldn’t tell her no either!

Sensing the turmoil, Lucy sits up and turns his face towards her. Her instincts were probably on point earlier about his anxiety. “We don’t have to, if you’re not ready, but I wouldn’t mind making out with you... just a little.” She adds in the goal as a way to allay his fears. And it works. Lucy immediately feels his shoulders relax again. She gently caresses his cheek, her eyes zeroing in on his lips. “I just… like kissing you Natsu.”

“I’ll let you direct then, a-and if I start going too far, just stop me. I won’t get mad, I just...”

“Shh, I know,” she smiles, “and that what I like about you.”

Lucy closes the gap and steals his lips, starting slow, then adding pressure behind it. Her hand slides behind his head, fingers weaving into his messy hair as she tilts her head to deepen the kiss. Their tongues tease and test, mouths molding together as teeth clack gently the further, they push each other’s oral boundaries. She could still taste some of the sweetness of the crapes lingering.

His own hands stay glued, one with fingers twined in her hair and the other to Lucy’s side, just below the rib cage. Natsu loses himself in her kisses, they were so soft and sweet, a little adventurous as she ran her tongue once over his canines and giggled. That brought a grin to his lips and a straight arrow through his heart. He wasn’t ready to say it out loud yet, but he loved Lucy. His heart knew it and that’s all that matters, so when the time is right, he’ll tell her, but not yet, he knew she wasn’t ready for that level.

Natsu’s so lost in the kisses he barely registers additional heat against his chest as Lucy’s hand has found its way under his shirt. It wasn’t doing more than simply resting against his pectorals, but it was much further than he’d expected her to venture tonight. Every few minutes her fingers would lightly curl against his skin or move slightly up or down, sending little shivers over his skin. As far as he was concerned, she could do anything she wanted to him as long as it was her choice.

It surprises him when Lucy starts to press forward. At first one of his hands moves to keep from falling back onto the couch, but her sudden whine triggers him to let it happen and the next thing he knows Lucy is using him as a bed. So, he wraps his left arm more firmly around her body to make sure she doesn’t fall off.

Lucy lifts her head to look Natsu in the eyes. “Is this okay?” She questions him. “Am I too heavy?”

“I don’t mind,” he smiles at her, “but are you comfortable? I could shift us over so we’re more on our sides.”

“That would be great. Just felt like snuggling more.”

He kisses her lips. “Works for me.” Natsu then adjusts their bodies carefully until Lucy’s back is resting against the couches backing with her head on his shoulder and chest. She wraps her arm around his torso and huddles close to his frame, while their legs are slightly tangled together. “Comfy?”

“Mmm hmm,” she nods her head against his chest and closes her eyes.

Natsu kisses the top of her head, bringing a smile to her face, then wraps his left arm over to rest his hand on her shoulder and cuddle her close. “Goodnight, Lucy.”

“Mmm. Goodnight, Natsu.”

Eight months ago, the only thing Natsu thought about was a career and now after that fateful train ride he knew his new goal in life had to include the blonde next to him. Lucy felt so perfect in his arms and oh, if only he could wake up like this every morning for the rest of his life, well than he’d be the luckiest man on the planet. With a smile of his own, he closes his eyes and lets the cadence of her heartbeat lull him to sleep. This was a very happy Halloween indeed!

Just to give an idea this is Shibuya on Halloween: I’m so sad I didn’t get to see it this year like I was supposed to ;-; but Natsu and Lucy got to have a little fun in my place lol.

Also a warning, the story gets much more angsty after this for several chapters 😅

[firepiplup]

How do i say no to people

You know that analogy about people with adhd having spoons for energy management or whatever? My spoons are on backorder from like 2 months ago and more got on that list now

The problem is that all of the things I'm being asked to do are Very Important Things

I have to feed my diabetic cat. This in itself is not a problem, however she's needs to eat at a specific time (12 hour spacing) and my current sleeping situation along with work do not allow this to happen consistently. Currently trying for 7:30, we'll see how it goes

My apartment has bedbugs, and there's no way in fucking hell I'm sleeping on my living room floor until my scumlord landlord actually gets the guy to come back to spray because he did spray but I'm still seeing adults and i "need to give the spray time to work" it's been fucking 2 weeks i don't know how is supposed to work but i feel like after 2 weeks whatever spray you did isn't going to get any stronger i just want to sleep in my own bed it's been like this since fucking March

With that part explained, I'm sleeping at my mom's house on the other side of town. This in itself isn't much of a problem, however as "payment" i have to take care of her dog in the morning, to practice because she's going on a week long vacation in October and none of her dogs can just be taken care of like normal dogs. He needs to wear a diaper to leave the room while i pick up his shit and soiled weewee pad and mop the floor, give him some time to be out of his room, and then feed him his special food mix. The other dog has allergies and probably will get into something he shouldn't, then not use the bathroom outside even though he literally has a doggy door that has constant access to the backyard. Neither dog get along with each other, which is why they are separated. Thank fuck the cat is just normal, this is why i prefer them

Now with THAT explained, it's difficult to take care of my own cat on time in the morning. But as the legendary Billy Mays says: But wait, there's more!

I just got rehired at my job working in a local understaffed pizzeria. My friend, ego also works there, is on vacation (good for her, she deserves it, absolutely no negativity towards her) so i have acquired her hours. So i now work 6 days a week, kinda sorta clopen but i guess it's more of opelose. Or a combination of both? Idk. The point here is, I'm then dealing with essentially running half a restaurant alone 6 days a week, with it not being 7 purely because the owner himself ALSO has the same work schedule as far as I'm aware, and wanted to give himself a day off, and since we are so understaffed it would be impossible unless we literally closed. My tasks include answering the phone, washing dishes, making sandwiches, making dinners, folding pizza boxes, and cleaning the tables/equipment on that side of the restaurant. So essentially everything except making pizzas, cleaning the pizza area, mopping in general, and driving. We generally close at 9, 10 on Friday and Saturday. Guess who was explicitly rehired to close those days? Guess how that's going to work with me having to be home around 7:30 to take care of my own cat? I have no idea either. It's only for about 3 weeks, but my mom, whom i have not asked for any additional help with anything, won't feed the cat while i have work, even though there isn't a guarantee that i can leave on time to THEN RETURN to close, because again I'm the only one on that side of the building. I understand the fear of the bedbugs, so that's probably it, but it still fucking sucks because the kitchen is on the other side of the apartment from the bedroom and there is literally no reason to go there to feed her. But i get it

Did we get to where i can do my own ADLs? Of course not. My neighbor is in the hospital, and her husband is blind. This is a new development that was only discovered an hour before starting this post (about 3:30 am for me). She's ok, it's for mental health reasons, and that's her own business about that. Her husband being blind is not a new development however. And he needs help taking care of the pets, specifically the birds. Which is fine, they just also need to eat on their own schedule. 8am, around lunchtime, and 8pm. Guess who's still at work? One of the birds is special needs because her beak got injured and needs to be essentially spoon fed. Which the blind husband can't do at all. Fairly simple task, but just adding to my obligations that are Very Important because they involve making sure things don't starve to death while my neighbor is in Crisis

Ok let's see, that's 4 Very Important Tasks/Obligations, and only one was originally my own voluntary one. Still not at taking care of myself yet, but i have my shelter, i have my job ("part time" minimum wage, hurray. Part time because even with me being there 6 fucking days a week open to close it still isn't technically enough hours for the state to recognize it as full time), and I'm taking care of *counting* about 8 pets for the next week. Will unemployment give me my money that I've been claiming since March? No? Will they let me claim with my new working hours that makes that while process even harder? Technically but it'll take over an hour for it to process and it doesn't even do that in the end? Well fuck, guess i have to wait to get paid on the books in cash and beg for a hand written paystub and have my hours worked written down. Glad i earned $100 this week, i hope now that my hours have increased i get some more

Next on the list, appointments. Because I'm a dumbass who can't remember shit if it isn't consistently recurring, i overbooked myself for next week. My much needed therapy appointment with my therapist that I've only met once and is the replacement for my much better therapist that i actually had a relationship with is supposed to have a session with me on Tuesday. Will i remember to do it this time? Possibly since i actually remembered it's on Tuesday. Will she send me the reminder text with the zoom link? Probably not. Wednesday, my one day off, thank fuck for that, is the main problem with the scheduling. My med appointment is for 11:30. Cool, can do. Driving lesson at 12. Oh, that's a little close, but i can manage that probably. I only average 1 lesson per year and a half, so it's fine, it's "healthy" to be nervous about operating a death machine powered by explosions. Have to go to social services to pick up, or attempt to, a new food stamps card. They probably close at 5, and add a Non Driver, i need to rely on someone to take me. The sooner the better, but it can't be during the lesson. Don't forget to take care of the creatures before and during all of this.

Ok. Great. There's an hour before work. Time to shower, because it's so fucking hot I'll be sweating like crazy by the time i get around the corner to the pizzeria, with me literally getting out and dressed and then walking out the door. Glad i finally did still to take care of myself. Eating? I might have something i can heat up quickly while the cat eats and so i can take my own meds. Dishes? Those are going to have to wait, i hope the heat wave doesn't get too bad, but it's been like this for a while, still slowly chipping away at them. Sleep? Severe insomnia. I partially blame the bed, my mattress is so comfortable, i hope the bedbugs like it because i can't fucking use it right now. I'd be sleeping so fucking soundly if i were in my own bed, and yet here i am. Maybe i should take the Trazodone now. I just hope I'll wake up on time. Oh look I'm exhausted, can't afford to buy comparatively better prepared coffee from Dunkin, so i guess my shitty at home coffee is going to have to do. Black because i don't have any creamer or milk or lactose free milk in my house. Just the way i hate it. Gonna have to deal with that i guess, maybe I'll learn to like it

The coffee pot lives in my fridge now. I'm worried to put it with the other dishes because if it sits there, not being washed like everything else, then i won't even have the option of coffee. It's just water and ground up beans, I'm sure it's fine

Maybe i can find some kind of coping skill/hobby to help me through my limited me time. Let's see.... I like to crochet, and that helps me get through the dishes by letting me alternate between them and a row/round on one of my many started projects. What? It's in a giant garbage bag with a bedbug treatment stick because of the damn ass bedbugs? Can't open it for at least another week and even then there isn't a place to put the yarn safely? Well fuck. I found that really helpful with keeping me grounded. Umm, well looking online, i should *checks notes* buy new yarn in the meantime and keep it somewhere safe. Uh, well, i can't afford more yarn now and i have nowhere to put it. Videogames it is maybe? Oh fuck now I've hyper focused too long on pokemon, rhythm heaven, and whatever daily games i do, i think i have 5 of those of varying lengths of time spent on them

Did i remember to brush my teeth? No. Do i remember that i should and then when i get out of the shower so i forget to actually execute? Yes. Have i gone insane? Probably

How many spoons is a person supposed to have per day? It takes more for me just to get through the day in general. Why does everyone need me to do their Very Important Tasks? Why is there never anyone else? Can my neighbor just not buy more birds when she gets home from Crisis?

I just want to have good mental health, why is this so hard

[kenkamishiro]

Ishida Sui’s Review of 2019

I didn’t think I’d ever finish this with my onslaught of classes including pharmacology, but I somehow managed! 6k word count, the longest TL I’ve done to date besides Parvati’s interlude for FGO. Lots of insight into Jack Jeanne’s production and what Ishida’s been up to for the past year. It was tough to translate because it was so long, but I had a lot of fun.

Let me know if there are any mistakes, I’m sure there’s a whole bunch. Have fun reading!

Original can be found here.

＊＊＊

2019. I’m reflecting on this past year while flipping through my agenda. Since I’m writing this for my sake, there’s going to be a lot of sections without much explanation.

January

○ This was when Jack Jeanne had yet to be announced, so I was mostly doing preliminary work at the time. Stuff like “BU” and “character facial expressions” will be finished some time this month, is written in my schedule book.

○ New Year’s party in Tokyo from the 16th - 19th. The New Year’s party is a joint party that’s comprised of the 4th editorial department (Shueisha’s seinen magazine branch) that’s held every year in January. I attended the party with the staff every year during serialization, minus my first year.

2019 will be the first New Year’s party since the series ended, but I thought I should stop inviting the staff to attend since we’re not working together anymore (plus it’d be a hassle), so I didn’t really invite anyone. But the day before the event, Editor M brought up the topic inside the taxi and asked, “Are none of the staff coming this year?” (Even if they’re invited now, it’s going to be impossible, asking them to fly the next day and causing a ruckus…) When I replied, “Hey, I’m sure it’d be fun if you invited them and they all came~”, the editor contacted Goubaru-kun, and after said, “He said he’s going.” Guess he wasn’t busy. In the end, the staff during serialization and several people from OB and OG came, almost identical to the lineup from previous years, and it occurred to me that maybe I should have just invited them from the start.

Anyway, at this year’s New Year’s party, I don’t really remember much of what happened. I talked with my senpais from back when I was an assistant for Kingdom, and outside the venue I sobered up from the agoraphobic dizziness I was feeling inside. At the second party I remember people talking to me haphazardly and being photographed. I wish I’d refused. Also, I was sexually harassed by Rikudou Matsubara, my senpai from the same region as me. This New Year’s party will be my last.

February

Briefing session for the game held in Tokyo. Key visual created. It says here [on the agenda] that I want to go to Kagoshima. Every week there’s a checklist for 10 km of jogging and weight training 2-3 times a week. I spent about a week doing some composition work. It ended up being helpful for me, but it made me decide not to work anymore with people with different levels of interest from me.

○ TRPG is written for the 28th. Usually we use the DX (Double Cross) system, but this time one of our participating players, M’s schedule was under mysterious attack. As game master, taking consideration of everyone who’d made time in their schedules for tonight, I thought we could switch to Cthulhu and asked them to wait an hour. 2 hours later I finished coming up with a scenario and began the session. It was fairly fun.

March

Finish BU this month, is clearly noted down. BU stands for bust-up, which are drawings of characters in standing poses [sprites] that are common in ADV games. Normally, since it takes a huge amount of work, the BU work is always divided up. The original drawings are done by the illustrator, in this case I do the base illustrations (line drawing & colouring), and using them as the base, the department sharing the work cleans up the line drawings and recolours it...that’s how the process goes. But since I’m a mangaka and don’t have the technology needed to make gaming assets, I thought it’d be best to leave it to the pros in that field, so that was how that stage proceeded. At that point in time at least.

I also had plans written down to go to Kagoshima. Looks like I didn’t go.

○ TRPG on the 25th. Player M’s schedule lined up with ours, so we played DX with 6 PL plus me as GM. We went to the aquarium, were attacked by witches, and so on.

April

Finish BU, is faintly written down. It seems like the work was more or less completed earlier this month.

○ High school friend K’s wedding on the 6th. Up until then I’d only been to two other wedding receptions. The weddings were for a different friend from high school, and Tajika-san, one of my senpais from Kingdom. This suddenly reminds me of that time at Tajika-san’s reception, when I took a super early flight because I absolutely didn’t want to be late whatsoever, but I ended up not being able to fly for about an hour and a half because of engine trouble or whatever, so I entered at almost the same time as the bride and groom during the reception…

K’s wedding was the first time in my life where I was present all the way from the wedding to the reception, but how should I put it, I was struck by a beam of light. I don’t know who he’s getting married to, I have no clue what their relationship is like. But I was somehow bombarded...by all these thoughts that became jumbled in my head, like the energy in this place, the power of their oaths, questioning what it was, how light isn’t always justice.

I got the feeling that this was what proper, respectable humans take part in, but since I'm fine with not being a proper, respectable human, I decided to not do anything other than what my heart desires.

I'm definitely not good with places where I’m in the spotlight. But congratulations.

○ “Play Sekiro” is strongly noted down. Thank you for supporting me in the first half of 2019.

○ TRPG for the 29th - 30th. DX. Player M’s character dies.

May - June

My schedule book is starting to look more scattered now. On the other hand, since I’ve got a good memory of this time, I can write while recalling the events.

○ I did the covers for the Touken stage play book.

I drew the cover illustrations for the Touken [Ranbu] stage play that Mikasano-san, who I’m grateful to for his work on the anime and movie scripts for TG, worked on. In my mind, it feels like I'm watching the back of who I'd consider my older brother in the creative world, or a fellow comrade on another battlefield fighting to the death. I think it came out quite charmingly, so I’ll include the links for now. Link 1 | Link 2 | Link 3

During this time of work for Jack Jeanne, I was working on “model sheets”. Blueprints for the characters’ attire, not just from the front but also the internal structure.

Unlike most other games, Jack Jeanne has “performance costumes” in addition to normal attire. Because of its “revue” theme, costumes that will be worn onstage needed to be prepared. I was shocked when I suddenly admitted that I needed model sheets for 5 different performances (spring, summer, fall, winter, final) for the 6 main characters, making 30 designs in total.

Back in the TG era, these kind of drawings that I just explained, or drawings that needed a lot of layers, were a pain in the ass. Plus I wasn’t good at them, so I thought that I didn’t want to do it for the rest of my life if possible. But it seems like I have to do this myself. With a sense of determination, I decided to work solely on this for all of May. At the same time, I made nothing but curry for all my meals. There’s no deep reason behind it, but my aim was to kinda boost my ability to concentrate daily by choosing to be decisive in that action.

○ Working on model sheets It came with an unintended effect. Because I spent a month on work that required balance and consistency, my right-left checking skills got better, and completely unrelated, I improved in drawing perfect copies. The design work for the model sheets itself became really fun to do, starting around when I became obsessed with the scarf design (sumo wrestler drawing) I definitely couldn’t use for Neji’s summer costume. I discovered that it’s precisely because I’m not good at this that my labour bore fruit. I feel like this was my experience for the latter half of the year.

July

The cast members were chosen. Unlike TG, there are 6 people + 1 person who can be referred to as the main character, so it was interesting to have a cast with some breadth.

Seems like lyrical work was the main thing I worked on.

Lyrical work. In Jack Jeanne, each performance contains several songs to sing and dance to, so each one is supposed to be sung. ...hence the lyrics.

The topic of what to do with the lyrics was brought up in November 2018. What happens typically is that, let’s say there’s singing in an idol game, then a company that specializes in it is asked to produce the songs. Even for Jack Jeanne, there were several candidates I could pick and choose from. But after a quick look-through, frankly speaking, they all looked the same to me. There’s one person that’s good, it’d be great if we could get them...is what I thought, but, “Even though I don’t have the skills, I’m the one who understands this world the best,” crossed my mind. ...should I try? I tried it. To be honest, I was super embarrassed since it’d be seen by a lot of people, but it evolved into, “Who cares if you’re doing it?” And so Jack Jeanne’s lyrics were tasked to me.

I mentioned this earlier, but there are multiple songs for each performance. So if you combine those plus the opening and ending songs, that makes 17 songs in total. Lyrics for 17 songs that I’m fully responsible for. What the hell...am I doing? Maybe it was from that moment that I started losing it.

Including the lyrics that I’d been working on bit by bit every month, the remaining ones were finished in one go this July. By the time I finished everything, my current state was, “Give me more songs...let me write more lyrics!” But it wasn’t over just yet.

August

Every time I meet someone I tell this story. I’m thinking of keeping it up. Here I am, relieved to have finished the lyrics, when a message pops up on the Skype group chat. It’s from Yamashita Daisuke of Broccoli.

To briefly touch upon Yamashita Daisuke, he is a young man who’s been involved with this project since October of 2018, and a poor soul who was tasked with conducting very important meetings on his third day of working at the company.

The producer from Broccoli was going on maternity leave, so he was scouted as her replacement. As an aside, if I have to be honest, the exchanges between me and Towada-san, and Broccoli’s Jack Jeanne team up until then were quite frustrating. “How about doing it like this?” they would counter. And we’d respond with something like, “This part is going to be developed later on, and since this will become foreshadowing for the entirety of the story, it can’t be modified that easily.” This kind of situation, having to explain everything in detail one by one, going 3 steps forward and being held 2 steps back, had been going on for about 3 years, so the two of us would often whine about it over drinks, going, “When should we quit, this is ridiculous,” etc.

Finally when things began going more smoothly, the producer who was leading the project took her leave, so I wondered if we’d be able to get along with Yamashita Daisuke, but he was, how should I put it, very diligent. For the last year I've been working with people who don’t put in their best effort, so I was very hopeful and thankful to him.

But I digress. This was the gist of the message that Daisuke sent.

“Kosemura-san’s who’s in charge of musical composition wants ‘scratch vocal tracks’ for when the singers are recording.” “Does Ishida-sensei happen to know anyone he could ask for this favour?” “I’m sure it won’t be a problem for you!” “Frankly speaking, it’s okay even if they’re bad.”

Huh. Well, as you might have already guessed, even with the lyrics, it’s impossible to really understand the song at first sight without knowing what kind of rhythm, what kind of emotions are being expressed in the bar measure. Of course we’d need ‘scratch vocal tracks’ to explain the general feeling of the song.

Now, what Daisuke said was, “Do you have anyone you can ask? It’s okay even if they’re bad. Or even you can do it.” But if I found a “it’s okay even if they’re bad” kind of person, we’d still have to show them how to sing it and explain how the rhythm goes. Daisuke already knew which was probably why he asked for the favour. “The person writing the lyrics would be able to make the scratch vocal tracks the fastest.” ...come to think of it, the demo songs that Kunimitsu sent me every time that were sung using Vocaloid, weren’t they also scratch vocal tracks?

Daisuke must have been in a pinch trying to figure out how he should ask me candidly. Ishida-sensei, I couldn’t just ask you to sing it, so I had to ask in a roundabout manner.

I’d already given my answer, but I was still hesitant. It’s true that after I finished writing the lyrics for the 17 songs I’d already lost sight of myself, but if I sang, my singing would reach Broccoli and Kosemura-san’s team’s ears. But I couldn’t just leave poor Daisuke hanging.

So I consult Towada-shi, whom I’d been collaborating with in creating the scripts for Jack Jeanne, for advice. (He had been in charge of TG’s novels, and I’ve known him for a long time.) “Did you check Skype?” “I did.” “What do you think?” “Start by looking up scratch vocal tracks,” so we paid a visit to YouTube. The first search result that came up for ‘scratch vocal track’ was a video of a vocalist who was used to sing a scratch track for AKB or something. I see, so that’s what it looks like. Innocuous, but I could see it was very professionally done.

And the second result that came up was Tsunku♂-shi. The figure of Tsunku♂-shi himself recording a scratch track for his idols. The producer himself became an idol, and was singing really cutely, in his emotions and how he sang it. “This is it?” I said. “Yeah, it is,” Towada-shi agreed. If Kosemura-san and his team, and the people who will be performing the songs have to listen to it, it’d be a disservice to them to half-ass it. I don’t like people who don’t try their best. That means I have to show that attitude myself. Let’s come out of my shell for poor Daisuke as well.

“You’re gonna become Tsunku♂.” “Yeah...I’m gonna be Tsunku♂!” And that was how I became Tsunku♂.

I replied to Daisuke on the Skype group chat. “Understood, I’ll do what I can.”

So this guy, who doesn’t even know what the ‘D’ in DTM stands for, first downloads the software, and begins setting up a recording environment. Other work is pushed aside. I set 3 days to work on this.

I timidly begin working on the scratch tracks. From the perspective of someone who doesn’t have to listen to their singing for a living, it starts out as a living hell, but you get used to it as you listen to it over and over.

And so I kept learning new things. I noticed I was harmonizing with myself.

Just like Tsunku♂-shi, I’d change the voice for each character. If it was Jack (male in a male role) I’d sing like a man, and if it was Jeanne (male in a female role), then like a woman, while the main character Kisa (female) should sound cute... No, Kisa needs to be cuter! I re-recorded her part many times. Depending on the song, I’d sing for 7 people. I was Jack Jeanne now.

Tsunku♂ (I) recorded 17 songs in 3 days, and sent the data first to Towada-shi. Since I was now Tsunku♂, I no longer felt any sense of embarrassment.

“I listened to it,” the reply came, and I called him. Towada-shi was roaring with laughter. I regained the embarrassment I’d forgotten.

“Oh no, I was laughing ‘cause I was impressed,” he said, but my heart was already as fragile as that of an abandoned dog.

“Even this is a big help to Kosemura-san, and Daisuke should be grateful, right?” Yeah. Although Towada-shi guffawed at me, Daisuke will surely thank me. And then he’ll definitely tell me what a good job I did!

I dumped the music into the Skype group chat. “I did what I could,” I added.

How will Daisuke react to my Tsunku♂? I waited restlessly. Three days later on August 5th, a formal message arrived after it was received.

“Thank you very much. We will schedule a meeting with Kosemura-san…”

I couldn’t believe my eyes. My hard work got dismissed with, “Thank you very much.”

Daisuke, why? I thought you were in a pinch, so I...were...were you fooling with me from the start? Answer me! Daisuke! Just tell me I did a good job, or follow up with something, I’m fine with anything! So much for my heart being like an abandoned dog, it’s more like a grown-ass man left naked on a snowy mountain. I did what I could! This feeling was welling up inside me, but was it myself that managed to do it?

○ Later, at a meeting with Kosemura-san “It’s great that you could do this much for us. You didn’t have to do all that.” With the gist of those words, a warm blanket was finally placed over my heart, which had almost frozen to death.

“I didn’t know how to respond. I wasn’t sure if Sensei was the most who did it in the first place,” Daisuke said, so I decided to satisfy myself by threatening, “I’m gonna tell this story until the day I die.”

September

○ Responses to the Questions to Ishida Sui contest We did a “Ask anything to Ishida Sui” contest as a project for the art book “zakki:re”, where purchasers could apply with a postcard. I was writing the replies for them.

I thought there’d be a lot more questions about TG or its contents, but surprisingly there were a lot of questions asking for life advice. There were quite a few questions that I had to seriously think about to answer.

It was kinda tough since there were over a hundred of them, but I thought it’d be nice to get in touch like this every once in a while.

○ BU work for Jack Jeanne Once the music-related tasks like lyrical composition and scratch vocal tracks were completed, I worked on BU. ...BU work? Wasn’t it finished back in April?

Well, a similar situation arose just like what happened with the lyrics. Regarding sprite quality I might not be able to beat the pros, but since I’m the one who best understands how the characters look best and their body balance, I had decided to do all the line drawing colouring myself in June. I had no clue whether I’d make the deadline or maintain the quality, but thanks to Broccoli’s understanding, I was allowed to make it myself.

I realized once again that I’m terrible at splitting up work. If I can do it by myself, I will.

Plus, it’s, how should I put it, starting from my TG days, even though it wasn’t a lot I got to see various types of workplaces. I’d see places where there was no sense of responsibility whatsoever, or the work may have been divvied up appropriately, but it felt like they were making something without a sense of purpose, like a main plot line that isn’t going anywhere.

It’s impossible to accomplish big things with that kind of stance, and I understand that the more people that intervene, the more uncertain the core becomes, so I didn’t like that kind of approach. It makes me wonder whether there’s any meaning in creating a work that’s conservative and unchallenged, and if it’s nothing more than a money grab.

Since I don’t have any desire for material things, getting fed up about it is useless, but I just can’t help thinking about it.

Of course, it may be difficult to get what I want 100% of the time, but I want to create things in an environment that I think is beautiful, even in places that I’m slightly involved in.

...in other words, BU work is tough, but I began remaking the sprites once again by myself. This was the toughest work I’ve ever done out of everything, including the serialization...

○ Scratch vocals training camp at the end of September I went to the recording for the scratch vocal tracks. Based on the scratch tracks that I made, we got professional vocalists to sing it again properly. This is what the actual cast would use as a reference to sing. (So my version was like the pre-scratch vocal track.)

I was stuck in Tokyo for almost a week. Wake up, get ready, go to the recording studio. Come back at 8 or 9 pm, rest and sleep, repeat.

It was like I was back in school, and since I don’t have a steady lifestyle, I enjoyed it.

Kosemura-san’s team is really great, and I know I mentioned this before, but I felt like their workplace was a very healthy production site. When I was drawing manga, I never had much time to talk with fellow manga artists, and I’ve never had the chance to experience what other professionals’ workplaces were like, so it was very exciting for me to see people as professionals tackle one thing seriously. The vocalists were as amazing as I expected, and although my scratch tracks were played at a loud volume to annoy me, I had a great time.

The game might have a high level of entry, but it’s worth listening to just for the songs, is what I truly thought.

○ Parting words to Editor M-shi This might have been back in August, but from 2018 to 2019 I had a lot of things on my mind, so I began talking to the editor.

In between the 11 years of serialization starting from my rookie days, I’d received guidance from him so it wasn’t easy, but I expressed to him that we should keep our distance for any future works.

“I want to become absorbed in myself, not to Ishida Sui or Tokyo Ghoul,” I told him. The other part said he also felt the same way, and accepted it. The next time we meet, I hope we can talk about what we’re into, what we’re going crazy over, he said.

And so, 2 months after that conversation was the scratch vocals training camp in Tokyo, and I had the chance for the two of us to talk again. That day I was completely tuckered out from recording the scratch track, but it was a day filled with accomplishments.

He took me to a restaurant with delicious food in Ebisu or somewhere, and after concluding our brief business meeting, I tried throwing out the cliched, “So, what are you up to lately?” As the lead writer, there was a part of me that was curious about how he was doing after that talk we had.

The editor began talking about homemade curry.

...that’s what he’s into? I decide everything from selecting and picking the ingredients myself, and next time I want Ishida-kun to also see how delicious the curry is...he told me passionately, but how should I put it, the conversation wasn’t very spicy.

The food was delicious.

October

○ BU work

What’s hard about BU work is that it’s difficult to separate the layers according to the face, hair and clothes, and they all have to have the same style and touch to it. If it was manga, then maybe...no, even in manga, there’s still some need to match the outfits, but it doesn’t really matter to that extent.

It’s because I don’t like game sprites. “This character has so much energy from their sideways pose! Amazing!” This never happens…

Around this time of the year, my older sister called this elaborate task, “the task you’re probably the worst at.”

○ The bean life I’m not really fat in particular, but I made up my mind to try dieting. At the time, my body fat percentage was at 18%, and I’ve never been below 10% ever in my entire life, so I’m thinking of aiming for that. Instead of eating rice with unseasoned chickpeas and black soybeans, I began my lifestyle of consuming vegetables and cuts of meat with less fat. Hopefully I can achieve my goal in about six months’ time.

○ Ano-chan, Honda Keisuke, and I After Ano-chan left “You’ll Melt More!”, her official Twitter account removed every single account she was following, but for some reason only two people remained. Those two people were Honda Keisuke and Ishida Sui. To Ano-chan, Honda Keisuke and Ishida Sui belonged in the same category. After some time passed, even we were removed, but I consider this one of my hottest mysteries of 2019. Ano-chan! I’ll always be waiting, so let’s have tea some time with Honda Keisuke!

November

○ BU Need I say more.

○ Main cast’s first recording session from the 26th - 27th.

I visited Tokyo with Towada-shi to supervise the main cast members’ recording session. Wow, everyone was so amazing~

Of course, not just the main characters. Terasaki Yuka-san who plays the main character, Tachibana Kisa, was wonderful as well.

In this kind of game genre, the position as the main character feels less important than the male characters, but I want her to stand firmly in this story’s script. I thought it’d be nice to have the main character not stand out too much and have her watch over the male characters, and I felt that Terasaki-san’s voice and acting fit that image perfectly.

About the cast members, it seems like there’ll be a chance to speak to them eventually, so I’ll come back again.

○ 1 month into the bean life I’m steadily losing weight. Basically I always work from home. I go to the gym and supermarket 2-3 times a week. I started cooking for myself. I got a brand new refrigerator to replace the one that suddenly broke. It actually cools things down now. Living standards have risen.

December

○ I break off ties with M who I played TRPG together with. He was a former classmate who was even chief assistant at some point during the series’ run, but eventually he ended up getting fired due to falling asleep at work. He said he’d attend the last session for the story that day (although his own character had already died), and I was working on a schedule to accommodate him, but once again he cancelled at the last minute.

It’s fine to cause trouble for me (although I’ll probably get pissed), but I can’t overlook treating others the same way. And it’s not the fact that his schedule didn’t match up, it’s because he was complete trash who didn’t know how to behave like an adult once he made plans with others, that I felt sorry for the other TRPG people who took time out of their schedules. Since I felt ashamed when I was together with him, I decided I’d had enough.

This was a year where I cut ties with a lot of people, but I think what they had in common was that I was ashamed to be with them. From now on, I don’t want to associate with such people.

What’s more, when I finally told him, he didn’t even try to deal with it and just gave up, responding, “So that’s how you felt about me. Okay. My bad.”

I won’t go anywhere with those kind of people again.

○ The bean life ⇒ the potato life. I changed it to potatoes.

○ BU is over...

On December 17th, I finally finished the BU work that I spent ageeeeeeeees on.

Although I said that serialization is tough, as long as I finished 18 pages a week that was it (although there were times where I was chasing myself with other work), so I could finish it as long as I didn’t sleep. I somehow managed to finish both the manuscripts and the colour illustrations this way, so expecting BU to be similar, I wasn’t really scared about it never ending, but BU truly was despair. When is this gonna end? I’m even working super hard… This is how it went on the entire time for over a month.

There were about 200 different sprites I had to make myself, including the different costumes and poses, and I had to do all of them.

For one thing, when, “This process is necessary,” came out, I had to go through the same process roughly 200 times, that it felt like I was facing the final boss who already transformed many times. Also, it’s like not equipping myself with a lot of equipment and recovery items in the previous town, but the dungeon I somehow managed to enter is extremely dangerous and even though there’s no safe points anywhere in sight, the boss suddenly comes up behind you, and you go I’m gonna die I’m gonna die

○ If you eat a lot while you’re losing weight, you’re going to have a bad time.

On December 15th I had trouble concentrating, so I tidied up the living room, created a space in the middle of the room, and darkened the lights. After an hour of meditating, only the sound of my breathing could be heard in the room, and so I went back to work with renewed concentration after confronting the issue (like a monk?).

On December 16th, I’ve been working the entire time since morning. I thought today was going to be the last day, but an entire day has passed and I don’t have any energy...

I’ll buy a midnight snack, replenish my energy, and end it once and for all. I’m trying to lose weight, but I went to the convenience store while thinking about how I’m gonna eat a katsu sandwich (I didn’t have the energy to cook).

While looking for something at a convenience store I can eat during weight loss, I think back over the last few months.

Like how it seems like BU is finally over, how a lot of things have happened, how I’m working hard, how lately I’ve been eating only potatoes, vegetables and meat.

And then I suddenly thought, “I wonder if the reason I don’t have any energy is because I haven’t had any rice lately.”

...I thought I should go on a diet in October, so I’ve been living a very modest life since then. Thanks to that, my weight has steadily decreased, and my body fat percentage has gone down 3% to 15%. What will happen if I continue with my relatively strict dietary restrictions during this difficult time?

...even if you’re losing weight, there’s a technique you can set up to binge eat during periods where weight loss stagnates, called cheat day (though results may vary), but what is it that makes no-cheating so inefficient even for weight loss?

...should I have a cheat day today?

“Huh, is it really okay?” I asked my mind. “Do it!” was the answer I got. From that moment, everything around me morphed into things I could eat.

No exaggeration, my knees trembled.

I crammed into my shopping basket carbohydrates, carbs, more carbs… It’s okay just for today, I say as I shove cream puffs, dorayaki, pudding, Family Mart chicken and ice cream. (Even if it's a cheat day, it’s probably not a good idea to take non-nutritional foods, but shh.)

With food in both hands and in high spirits, the first thing I ate was the delicious part of the Family Mart chicken.

I groaned loudly, all alone in the room.

Alright, let’s finish this work! I was energized, but my blood sugar levels spiked so much that I felt extremely sleepy and went to bed instead.

The next day on the 17th, I wake up at 4 am and immediately notice something unusual. My body is burning. I’m sweating.

I immediately wake up, and overflowing with energy, I head for my desk. I’m working actively, and I finish the BU work. It felt like I was pushing forward with only positive energy, feeling uplifted.

I break out a laugh at a slight joke I found funny from a foreign drama (The Mentalist) I’m playing while working. The greenery of the plants and the lighted sink glisten, and the scenery is vivid.

What is this?

I suddenly recall the story of a YouTuber I saw recently. He lives in a region where medical marijuana is legalized, and he explained in detail what changes would occur if you smoked cannabis.

To put it roughly, you feel calm and your senses sharpen. Trivial things can become funny, and funny videos can make you roar with laughter.

Then maybe...I thought, I'll watch Nagareboshi (a comedy duo) on YouTube. Usually I go, haha, that's funny! But that day I exploded with laughter...all of their videos were just too funny.

I learned that when you’re losing weight and suddenly eat a lot, it alters your mind and body as if you smoked cannabis. (※ Just to be clear, I don’t know what cannabis is like.)

Thus the BU work ended with me being high as a kite.

(※ I’m covering it with mosaics for now. I’ll remove it once I can announce it.)

○ I stopped playing TRPGs. I’ve been doing it for about two and a half years, but it also helped me in honing my creative skills. I’d sometimes perform, so it was useful when I was recording the scratch vocals… It was a good experience, managing to vicariously live the energy of ending a story. It was a story about a group of friends, so it was easy to appreciate.

Summing up 2019

After the weekly series finished in 2018, I was in a daze for a few months, but in 2019 I worked only on Jack Jeanne for the year.

This year I tried various things, and trite as it may seem, felt the possibilities within myself expanding. I had many opportunities to realize how important it is to keep a distance from bad things that don’t do anything for me.

During my work on Jack Jeanne, I vaguely thought about my future creations. The work I’m doing now in game production is fun so I wonder if I can keep working in this field, but I’d also like an environment where I can release things more constantly.

I can’t promise anything specific, but I’m going to work on things that I want to do.

I look forward to what 2020 has to offer. Have a happy New Year.

2019.12.31 Ishida Sui

[banghyung]

and they were roommates (s)

word count - 3k

warnings - parties, drinking, minimal drunken smut scenes, alcohol, fingering

member - Hongjoong of ATEEZ

request - “Can I request a tsundere Hongjoong (ATEEZ) angst/fluff.” and “Hey can you write smut with Hongjoong from ATEEZ?”

a/n - ok so i know that being turned on doesn’t sober you up, but let’s just pretend that in the world where you’re best friends with san and share an apartment with hongjoong that being turned on does in fact sober you up ok thanks :) ngl the angst is a little,,,, weird?? just because i knew i wanted the scene of them yelling at each other but when i went to go write it i realized that they didn’t really have much of a reason to yell at each other so i just kinda pulled something out of my ass. also,,, i know this was supposed to be posted monday but i went a little overboard with it since i was combining the two requests :))) p.s i have an interview in approx 10 hours,,, its about 5 am,,,,, and i havent slept yet soo wish me luck

You weren’t sure what you were signing up for when you agreed to share an apartment with a friend of a friend that you had never met until a few days before he moved in. What you were sure of, however, was that you were in desperate need of someone to split the rent with, and how bad could they be if you had mutual friends? You convinced yourself that, at worst, they would be messy, loud, and way too outgoing for your tastes - at best, clean, friendly, and just the right amount of social anxiety to spruce everything up. What you got? Kim Hongjoong.

“Come on,” your mutual friend, San, urged, “he can’t be that bad to live with.”

“It’s not that he’s bad to live with,” you explained, “I just don’t know how to take him.” San raised his eyebrows suggestively. “Oh come on, you know that’s not what I meant.”

“Well, what do you mean? Do you not get along?”

“That’s the thing - I don’t know.”

“How do you… not know… if someone doesn’t like you,” San asked incredulously. 

“He just,” you flailed your hands around, not quite sure how to word what you were trying to say. 

“Oh yeah, no, I completely understand. He just,” San mocked, moving his hands in a similar fashion.

You glared at your friend, who laughed and continued to sip on the milkshake sitting in front of him. “He just, locks himself in his room constantly, which is fine I mean to each their own - but whenever I try and talk to him he either acts like I just bored him so much that he lost 5 years off of his lifespan or he just blinks at me like I’m speaking another language. I don’t think he dislikes me, and I don’t dislike him, but…”

“But you just don’t know how to take him.”

“Exactly!”

“I mean have you considered that what you’re saying is either so boring that you really are depleting his life force and/or saying something so stupid that he really does think you’re talking in another language?”

“Please, for the love of everything good in the universe, please remind me why I’m friends with you?”

“Because your life would be boring without me.” San winked. “But, I do have a class starting in, about 2 minutes ago so I better get going,” he said, getting up from his seat as if he has all the time in the world, “I’ll talk to you later, sweet cheeks.” 

“Hope you don’t trip on your way!”

“I’ll do it just for you, honey bunches.” You smiled and rolled your eyes. Pulling your phone out of your pocket, you checked the time and noticed that you were almost late for your daily nap, an appointment you couldn’t afford to miss at this point in the semester. You quickly picked up your bag and began the trek home.

Walking into your apartment, you hung your keys on the rack and immediately ran to your room - not in fear of seeing your roommate, but in excitement of seeing your bed. 

“Hello gorgeous,” you spoke as you flopped down onto your mattress, “I’ve missed you.”

“Do you normally talk to your bed like its your lover,” you heard a voice ask. 

You whipped around, sitting up quickly as you realized who was standing in the doorway. Your mouth hung in an ‘o’ shape, starstruck by the fact that he was even talking to you, nonetheless how casual his statement was. 

“I see I walked in on a very important milestone in your relationship, I’ll leave you to it, then,” Hongjoong said as he began to walk away.

You sat there for a few minutes after he walked away, your mind reeling. Months into your cohabitation and the first words he speaks to you are after hearing you gush over your bed. As expected, you though, I am an Idiot. 

The commotion, or lack thereof, left you thoroughly confused. So confused that your nap time had come and passed, and you were still laying on your back, staring at the ceiling, trying to figure out what you possibly could have done to make this man act so coldly towards you. Was it something you said when he first moved in? Were you too strict about cleanliness before even allowing him a chance to get settled? Did you unknowingly interrupt something that he was doing in his bedroom and he just held a secret grudge against you for it? Maybe he has a girlfriend and the fact that he’s rooming with you is causing problems with their relationship. Maybe San had hyped you up too much and Hongjoong found himself very disappointed in the person that he now has to live with until the end of the leasing contract. Maybe - you didn’t know. You were sure that you had given Hongjoong no reason to dislike you. Most of the cleaning that he did - he just did, without you having to ask him. The only words you’ve spoken to him are greetings when you see him around the flat or inquiring as to whether or not he would be going to some event held by your mutual friends, as far as you knew you were never harsh or short with him, but yet he looks at you like you’re some kind of alien species. 

“Whatever,” you mumble to yourself. “Let him be this way, I could be a much worse roommate.” You finally rolled out of bed, the grumbling of your stomach the only thing keeping you from just calling it a night, and head into the kitchen. Of course, who else would you see but Mr. Judgemental, as you had decided to call him, sitting at the table with his nose buried in a book while he shovels cereal into his mouth.

Hongjoong looks up for just a second, long enough to make eye contact before looking back at his book. You steeled yourself, ready to be the cold, hard bitch you had just convinced yourself that you were. You opened your mouth, ready to start a fight, when instead you asked, “Are you going to that party San and Yunho are planning?” Hongjoong shrugged, not taking his eyes off of his book. “If you decide to go maybe we could carpool, or something. Ya know, saving the environment and all.”

“I’ll let you know,” he replied abruptly, quickly putting an end to the conversation. 

“Alright,” you said awkwardly as you grab a box of cereal out of the cupboard. “Well, have a good night.” And with that you all but sprinted back into the safety of your room, only a box of cereal in hand. 

Three days later and you were still rolling in self hatred over your multiple awkward encounters with Hongjoong. However, as the party that San and Yunho promised would be an “absolute rager” started in a little less than four hours, you were bound and determined to turn your luck around.

“What I need,” you said to yourself as you walked to your closet, “is a good fuck.” 

You nodded to yourself, a small smile growing on your lips in anticipation of the possibilities that the night might hold. You moved over to your phone, pressing play on your favorite playlist and dancing across your room. The words of your favorite song fall out of your lips as you glide across the floor while, unbeknownst to you, your smile is mirrored on the face of your roommate as he stops shortly in front of your door and gazes upon your lightheartedness. 

“You’re here,” San yells excitedly as you walk through the door, throwing his arms around you in a common drunk-San manner. Hongjoong had turned down your second offer of giving him a ride to the party, explaining that he wasn’t feeling up to the party scene, except in fewer words. You wrapped your arms around your best friend, telling him of your plan for the night. 

San’s eyes lit up. “Alright then, we have work to do. Let’s go!” He grabbed your hand, pulling you to the dance floor, or the area where people seemed to be dancing. You looked warily at the people that were packed into the room, pressed against one another and spilling alcohol everywhere. “Oh stop worrying. Here, drink this.” San handed you his cup and you took a swig, your eyes watering as you struggled to swallow the disgusting liquid.

“Are you drinking straight vodka,” you asked, your throat on fire.

“No,” San yelled back, “it’s gay vodka! Have some more!”

You rolled your eyes despite the smile growing on your face, taking one more swig before handing the cup back to San. He downed the rest of the drink before grabbing your hand once more, pulling you into the throng of partygoers. 

The amazing thing about parties is that reality is never quite what it seems - what feels like hours could be only minutes, and what feels like minutes have been hours. That’s how you feel when you unlock your phone for the first time since arriving and read the time: 2:38 AM. You groan inwardly, the night was escaping you and you had yet to find someone to give you what you needed. Thinking you weren’t drunk enough, you move towards the kitchen, getting into the hidden cabinet where San hides his favorite alcohol. Forgoing a cup, you pour the equivalent of at least 5 shots of vodka right down your throat and turn back to the crowd. 

You weren’t sure when it started, but all you were aware of was someone’s lips drunkenly crashing into your own. You opened your eyes slightly, wondering if you had somehow made a grave mistake and wound up kissing San. The good news: you weren’t kissing San. The bad news: you definitely recognized the man who was feverishly kissing you, but you couldn’t place from where. Knowing you were too drunk to think properly, you threw yourself back into the kiss - wrapping your arms around the stranger’s neck and pulling him closer to you. 

He pressed his body up against yours, pinning you to the wall as his hands moved to grab hold of your hips and pull them to his own. Your breath hitched as you felt his length against you, the anticipation of what was to come slowly pulling you out of your drunken stupor. His hands were desperate as they ran up your sides, and yours found themselves entangled in his hair. 

As the kiss grew in intensity, you found yourself searching for some type of friction, and rolled your hips against his in your search. A strangled groan escaped him as he pushed you back against the wall, his lips moving to your neck and leaving wet kisses down your skin. You reached down, placing your hand against his growing bulge and stroking his length through his jeans.

Another broken groan escaped his mouth as he whispered in your ear, “Two can play at that game.” You felt his hands slide down the sides of your thighs before moving towards your heat. The man, whose identity you still were not sure of, pushed your skirt up onto your stomach, revealing the lacy underwear that you had worn for this exact occasion. He moved his head from the crook of your neck, where it had fallen as you continued to try and rub him through his jeans, as he looked down at you. “Delicious.”

Your eyes shot open at his words, and you quickly looked down at his jeans. Your hands flew to the button, desperate to rid him of the material when you felt his fingers gently ghost over you. You bit your lip in frustration as your eyes fluttered shut once more, and you heard the man laugh breathily. “I wish I could see you like this all the time,” he whispered in your ear as he lightly traced his fingers along your thighs, inching closer to where you were desperate to have him touch, but not getting close enough. “You look so adorable all desperate and worked up, I wouldn’t mind seeing this every day.” 

Having enough of his teasing, your hand flew back to his hardened bulge, his pants unbuttoned but unmoved. You pushed his pants down his hips just enough to slip your hand into his boxers. He gasped loudly as you made contact with his throbbing member, and his fingers immediately pushed aside the barely-fabric of your panties and his thumb began rubbing circles onto your clit. Your eyes rolled back as he pushed a finger into you, his thumb never stopping. Your hand, which had started to haphazardly jerk him off, stuttered as your knees grew weak. 

“If I knew it was this easy to get you wet I would have done this ages ago baby girl,” the man groaned, his voice hitching every few words due to your actions on his length. He pushed another finger into you, and a deep moan left your mouth. Your free hand wrapped around the man’s shoulders, pulling him closer to you. 

“Do you like that?” You nodded quickly, biting your lip to keep endless moans from spilling out. “No, no, no. Let me hear you.” He moved his free hand up to your mouth and pulled your lip from between your teeth, before pressing his lips against yours. He began moving his hand faster to match your rhythm and he drank up every single noise you made. 

“Fuck baby, you’re so tight. Let’s just go home, hmm?” 

It was then that you realized, you recognized that voice. Your eyes flew open as you went to confirm your suspicions and suddenly wished it was San that you were kissing. There, with his fingers still working magic inside of you, and your hand still jerking him off, was Kim Hongjoong.

To say that the next week was tense would be an understatement. I mean, you regained your bearings in your best friends bathroom with your hands down your roommate’s pants and his down yours. And you didn’t even get to orgasm! You both tried to avoid each other as much as possible - which wasn’t an unusual thing for the household, but now under much different circumstances.

It was going into the second week of avoidance when you finally lost your patience. You walked into the kitchen, wanting an actual meal after days of eating nothing but snacks in an effort to stay locked in your room as much as possible, and saw Hongjoong standing at the counter, preparing his own food. You quickly turned around, ready to head back to your room, when you changed your mind. 

“No,” you said.

“No?” Hongjoong’s voice sounded utterly uninterested, but still teasing.

“No. This is my apartment, too. I’m not going to hide in my room until the lease is up just because you decided to shove your hands down my pants.” You turned and opened a cabinet, studying its contents.

“I did what?” Hongjoong turned towards you, looking at you like you were insane. “As far as I remember, I was just kissing you until you decided to start… to start rubbing on me!”

“Fuck you, I was drunk! I didn’t know what I was doing!”

“You think I wasn’t?”

“How the fuck should I know? I’m not your fucking nanny. And from the way you were moving I’m pretty sure you did know what the fuck you were doing.” After realizing what you just said, and pretty much admitting that Hongjoong was the source of the best fingering you had ever received, you felt your face heat up.

“I-” Hongjoong started, his mouth opening, and closing, as he struggled to find what to say in response. “I genuinely don’t even know how to respond to that.”

“Good, then just shut the fuck up!”

“I don’t know what kind of fucked up victim complex you have going on here, but like you said, I live here, too. I’m not going to put up with you yelling at me like I’m a child just because you’re frustrated that I could’ve given you the best orgasm of your life and you decided to freak out instead. Maybe you should go buy a vibrator or something, I hear their good for people who enjoy the sticks up their asses.”

“Speaking of asses,” you said, turning to face him. “You can kiss mine.”

“Fuck you. I will.”

“Fine.” You didn’t realize how close you had gotten, until you could feel his breath fan over your face. He looked down at you, not a sign of any emotion on his face, before grabbing your cheeks in his hands and pressing his lips against yours. You froze, unsure of how to react to the situation. After a few milliseconds of internal debate, you wrapped your arms around his shoulders and kissed back. Hongjoong pushed you against the counter, his arms wrapping around you and trying to bring you as close to his body as he possibly could. It was minutes before you finally broke apart, the need for air outweighing the feeling of the kiss. 

“You know,” he whispered against your lips, “that was the stupidest fight I’ve ever had with anybody.”

You laughed airily before nodding your head in agreement. “You know, in the past 30 minutes you’ve spoken more to me than you have since you moved in. I really thought you hated me.”

He pulled his head away from you to look down at you incredulously. “I never hated you. Honestly, I’ve always thought you were so beautiful, from the day that San introduced us a couple days before I moved in. But you had a guy over the day after I moved in, so I took that as your way of saying that you wouldn’t want anything to do with me, and that I was just here to split the bills.”

It was your turn to look up at Hongjoong with disbelief written in your eyes. “So you’re telling me this entire time I could’ve been having amazing orgasms and not feeling awkward in my own home if I would’ve just clarified that I wasn’t implying anything with that one night stand?”

“Well, the blame is partially mine, too. I was definitely being oversensitive, there was no reason for me to act the way I have these past couple of months. But-”

“But?”

“But, I’m not a ‘no strings attached’ kind of person.”

“What do you mean?”

“Either you get the annoying, clingy side of me along with the amazing orgasms, or none of it.”

“Well,” you said, wrapping your arms around his neck. “I suppose I wouldn’t mind that 2-for-1 deal.”

Hongjoong smiled down at you before picking you up and carrying you to your room. “Now,” he began, “how about I give you that fuck you’ve been needing?”

Your face immediately warmed. “You heard me?”

“Absolutely, it was adorable. Now, should we begin?”

[trashyswitch]

The Superior Security Guard

Mike Schmidt and Jeremy Bond over the fact that both of them worked part-time for a week, at a Pizzeria run by Freddy Fazbear Entertainment.

I was inspired by a friend to try branching away from the Afton's this time. So, I spent around 3 hours looking up other FNAF characters' statistics and stuff...

Let's just say: The Five Night's at Freddy's Franchise is even MORE CONFUSING THAN EVER!

But, I can't change that. So, I'm choosing to take advantage of a Fanon headcannon! (Mike and Jeremy are best friends)

DISCLAIMER: A bit of mild language.

Jeremy and Mike met each other during Jeremy's work week at Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria. When Jeremy was leaving Wednesday morning at 6AM, Jeremy had walked out the door to find a man standing outside, staring at the new pizzeria joint. Recognizing the security outfit from his own experience, Mike asked Jeremy about the job and brought up his own experiences. So, instead of sleeping the day away (Which was his original plan), Jeremy invited Mike to go buy a soda with him.

Before they knew it, they became quick friends.

Over the years, they leaned on each other to mentally deal with their weird, and eventually quite terrifying, job experiences. When the company was hit with missing/murder charges, Jeremy and Mike talked each other through the terrifying nightmare, that was child murderers in animatronic costumes/children being stuffed in the animatronic robots. Once in a while, to cope with the experiences and make light of it, they would make silly jokes while they talked.

One day, Jeremy and Mike were walking around Mike's neighborhood, each holding a take-out cup of coffee. It was somewhat peaceful just walking on the sidewalks, listening to the spring birds singing and watching them fly from tree to tree.

"Hey Mike?" Jeremy called calmly.

"Yeah?" Jeremy replied.

"Which animatronic was your favorite when you were younger?" Mike asked.

Jeremy chuckled. "You seriously don't remember? I've told you so many times! It was Chica." Jeremy replied.

"Why though?" Mike asked.

"I don't know. I like yellow, and Chica's a yellow chicken. Plus, she's the one that holds the cute, pink cupcake!" Jeremy explained.

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that cupcake. I think it was actually named something...something that started with a C. Carly?" Mike attempted.

"Maybe?...No, Carl! That was its name! Carl!" Jeremy replied. "Oh! and the other reason I liked Chica, was because she was the only girl animatronic." Jeremy explained.

Mike laughed at the last remark. "Chica wasn't the only girl. There was Bonnie-"

"Bonnie was a male! He just...had a lot of 'robot make-up'." Jeremy replied, making quotation marks with his fingers. "Bonnie, playing his bright red electric guitar, looking like a drag queen back then." Jeremy joked, playing the air guitar to add to the humor.

"Wait, really? I don't really remember that part." Mike reacted.

"I'm just over-exaggerating a little bit." Jeremy mentioned.

"Alright...Since Chica was the only girl animatronic, did that influence your decision on which robot was deemed your favorite?" Mike asked.

Jeremy's eyes widened. He looked away quickly, as to not raise suspicion. "...What are you implying if it did?" Jeremy asked.

"Oh nothing." Mike replied, shutting his mouth with a smug look.

"You know what? No! We're having this conversation! What were you suggesting?" Jeremy asked.

"Oh I don't know...Have you heard of the term...'Furry' before?" Mike hinted.

Jeremy's jaw dropped. How DARE he?!

"Dude!" Jeremy yelled, lightly pushing him with a smile on his face. "What is wrong with you! I am NOT a furry! And I am CERTAINLY not in love with those creepy, toy-looking robots." Jeremy argued.

"Okay, okay. I believe you." Mike said, still wearing his smug look. Jeremy narrowed his eyes suspiciously.

"Something tells me you don't..." Jeremy suspected.

Mike raised his eyebrows. "Are you suggesting I SHOULDN'T believe you?" Mike asked.

"Wha-NO, I'M saying that your freaking eyebrows were telling me a different story!" Jeremy reacted.

"Oh...were they now?" Mike asked in a smug voice, before making waves with both his eyebrows.

Jeremy chuckled in both amusement and frustration. "Do you want a punch to the face?" Jeremy warned.

"Oh please!" Mike exclaimed, pinching Jeremy's bicep muscles with his right arm. "Where's the muscle? I don't feel any muscle." Mike joked.

"I may not have arm muscles, but I can skill kick your ass!" Jeremy shot back.

"How? You kinda need arms, in order to do any sort of fighting..." Mike mentioned.

"How about this: Let's stick a pin into this conversation, and open it back up when we get to your house. Alright?" Jeremy suggested.

Mike rolled his eyes with a smile, but nodded in agreement. "Okay. The conversation's been pinned." Mike replied.

The boys decided to take a side road, to head back to Mike's house. After another 10 minutes or so of walking, they finally arrived back to Mike's house. Mike and Jeremy walked up the driveway, and up the stairs to the door. Mike pulled out his keys and unlocked the door. After removing the key and opening it up, both men walked into the house and closed the door behind them. Unbeknownst to Mike, Jeremy had already been spending the 10 minute walk trying to come up with a plan. By the time they reached the house, Jeremy was ready.

"Okay. I'm pulling the pin out. Let's figure out who can beat the other in a match." Mike decided.

Jeremy walked towards each other. They cracked their knuckles as they stood, getting ready to fight each other. In the background, energetic music played to intensify the moment. Both men readied themselves, and waited for the countdown.

3!

2! Both men clicked the 2 button...

1!

GO!

And, they're off! Both men managed to get the extra boost, and were zooming down the raceway. The selected track for this game, was Luigi Circuit. Though Mike managed to completely miss the question mark power ups, Jeremy successfully got a power up! On the top left side of Jeremy's screen, the cube spun, revealing all the power ups he could get. He ended up getting a banana!

"Aw, come on! Banana's suck! Whatever." Jeremy commented, before clicking the button to get Luigi to throw the banana.

As you probably would've guessed by now: The boys were playing Mario Kart Wii for their competition! Whoever got at least 2 wins against their opponent, was deemed the winner.

"What?! Bowser, get outta here!" Jeremy shouted at the CPU who just passed him.

Mike (King Boo) quickly began to catch up, thanks to the speed boosts littered all over the track. Mike passed baby daily, Wario and Birdo, quickly putting him in 4th place.

Soon, both men passed the finish line again. Lap 2! Both men managed to get a power up each, this time! Mike got a shrinking power up, while Jeremy got a red shell!

Mike activated his power up almost immediately.

"Hey! Who made everyone small?!" Jeremy asked. Suddenly, as if the game was deliberately answering his question, a large King Boo drove past the tiny Luigi.

"Aww! Look at the wittle tiny Luigi." Mike teased.

Jeremy smirked and waited for his character to grow bigger again. Once his character grew back to his normal size, Luigi threw the red shell at King Boo.

"Suck on that, Mike!" Jeremy yelled.

"Ha! Says the character with the ghost vacuum." Mike replied with a smug face.

"I- HEY!" Jeremy yelled, elbowing Mike in the arm.

"Oh, you wanna play THAT game, huh?" Mike asked, elbowing Jeremy back.

"Yeah! Fight me bro!" Jeremy yelled.

Mike shrugged his shoulders. "You asked for it..." Mike replied before tackling the man down.

"Mike! Get off me! OHOHOW! YOUR ELBOWS ARE JABBING INTO ME!" Jeremy shouted, attempting to push Mike off him.

As Jeremy tried to push at him, Jeremy accidentally squeezed his side while he was pushing against it with his hand. This caused a sudden jolt and a short spurt of laughter to leave his mouth. Jeremy paused his actions for a split second, and looked at Mike with a smug, suspicious glare. "What are you laughing at? Is squishing me considered funny to you?" Jeremy asked.

"Kinda, yeah. Your body is just so tiny and squish-able!" Mike teased, squeezing Jeremy's side.

"Dohohon't you eheven tryhyhy tihihicklihihing me, you bahahahastahahard!" Jeremy warned through his giggles, before giving Mike a few squeezes and pokes back.

"AAAAH! Nohohohoho! Quihihit thahahat! Dohohon't yohohohou eheheven ahahahattempt ihihit! I am much bigger, and stronger than you. I could RUIN YOU-" Mike warned. Unfortunately for Mike, Jeremy moved his fingers up to his bottom ribs, and began tweaking and digging into them. "AAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AAAH! NO! JEREMY! PLEHEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Mike bursted out, falling beside his friend.

"I think you keep on forgetting what tiny people are capable of. I can climb all over you and destroy you!" Jeremy mentioned as he jumped onto his best friend to dig his fingers into the farthest side of Mike's ribs.

"DAHAHAHAHAMIHIHIHIT! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Mike shouted, pausing his squirming to just let out all the laughter in his lungs. Jeremy's smile began to grow wider as he tickled him. Jeremy just adored Mike's laugh! It was so bubbly and fun to hear. There had been times in his life where Mike would laugh out loud for a good 5 minutes, and Jeremy would just be over the moon to hear his laugh. It was really contagious, and usually made Jeremy laugh along with him. When they first met, Jeremy would use as many stupid or funny jokes on him, just to hear Mike's laugh. It was kind of silly in a way. Is it normal to appreciate a person's laugh that much? Or is it weird? Jeremy wasn't really sure. So, the best thing Jeremy decided to do with it, was to just enjoy the laughter for as long as it lasted. Jeremy had drifted off into a daydream amidst the fight. He was so deep into the trance, that he didn't even realize what was going on in front of him!

Meanwhile, Mike had decided to take advantage of Jeremy's dreamy state, to tickle him back.

Suddenly, Jeremy knocked himself out of dreamland with his own bout of laughter! By the time Jeremy found out what was going on, Jeremy was giggling and laughing under Mike's wiggly fingers.

"Hehehehehehehe! Mihihihike! Cohohohome ohohohon!" Jeremy giggled.

"What do you mean 'come on'? You were the one who lost his concentration in the middle of beating me! I'm just getting my revenge now." Mike teased.

"Ihihihi dihihidn't mehehehehean tohohoho!" Jeremy mentioned.

"Well obviously, you didn't. I don't think you could've controlled it! But, I'm still gonna make you regret it." Mike replied with a wink.

Mike shoved his hands into Jeremy's armpits next. Jeremy gasped and squealed before rolling into a fit full of laughter. "NAHAHAHAT THEHEHEHERE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! PLEHEHEHEASE! IHIT'S TOHOHO MUHUHUHUCH! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Jeremy shouted.

"Hahaha! This is awesome! Now, how would you feel if I just..." Mike asked, drifting off as he lifted Jeremy's arm above his head.

"Nonononono! Don't you even TRY TO DOTHATPLE-EEEEEAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! NAHAHAHAHAHAHAHOHOHOHOHO!" Jeremy screamed.

Mike jumped and retreated his hands out of pure panic. "I'm not killing you! I swear, I'm not killing you!" Mike reacted, putting his hands up in arrest.

"Yohohohou wehehere clohohohose..." Jeremy warned.

"Oh really? Well, now I wanna tickle you more." Mike reacted before shoving his fingers into Jeremy's armpits again.

"WAHAHAHAHAIT! NO! MIKE PLEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEASE!" Jeremy shouted.

"Please? Please what? Please tickle you more? Gladly!" Mike replied smugly as he lifted Jeremy's arm up and wiggled his fingers on Jeremy's exposed armpit.

"MIKE! PLEASE, I'M BEGGING YOHOHOHOU! DOHOHOHOHOHOHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Jeremy shouted before dissolving into endless hysterical laughter.

Mike began to giggle along with Jeremy. He was enjoying this way too much...But, who cares? Mike certainly didn't! He liked bringing Jeremy down to just a puddle of laughter. Normally, that involved a really good story. Today though, it was achieved through simple play-fighting.

After another minute of tickling his armpits, Mike brought his hands down to his sides again, to let him breath more. Jeremy happily took in as much air as he could, and allowed himself to still giggle through the tickly squeezes on his sides. It was a more comfortable laughing pace. It felt better to laugh lightly, than to laugh hysterically.

So, Jeremy decided to get Mike laughing as well. Jeremy ran his fingers around Mike's sides for a bit. When he felt curious, Jeremy reached his hand under Mike's shirt and discovered something new: Mike's pretty ticklish on his belly! Specifically, his belly button! Jeremy gladly took advantage of it, and listened to Mike's inner music, that was his laughter.

"Hehehehehehehe! Dohohohon't yohohohou dahahahare! Yohohou'll rehehehegrehehet ihihit...GAHAHAHAHAHA! JEHEHEREMY NOHOHOHOHO!" Mike laughed joyfully.

Jeremy's smirk began to widen, as he swirled his finger inside Mike's belly button. "Is someone a little ticky-ticky-ticky-ticklish?" Jeremy teased.

Mike's face almost immediately began to glow a red hue. "SHUHUHUT UHUHUHUHUP!" Mike spat.

Jeremy gasped. "Is Mike a little flustered? Is Mikey-Wikey getting flustered from the ticky-ticky's on his belly button?" Jeremy teased, treating him like a toddler.

Mike was slowly going insane. Teasing his belly button?! Talking to him like a TODDLER?! UH...NO THANK YOU! MIKE IS AN ADULT, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

"Quihihihit teheheheasihihing mehehehe! Ihihi'm nahahahat a chihihihihild!" Mike shot back at Jeremy. Before Jeremy could do anything else, Mike had grabbed Jeremy's upper arms and pulled him down onto Mike's lap! Mike sat up and flipped Jeremy over onto his back, before experimentally digging his fingers into Jeremy's ribs.

"NAHAHAHAHAHA! OHOHOHOH, YOHOHOHOHOU SUHUHUHUHUCK SOHOHOHOHO BAHAHAHAHAD!" Jeremy shouted.

"Wow! You're entire upper body is ticklish! And not just a little ticklish, but SUPER ticklish! We'd better make sure no animatronics find out about this." Mike suggested.

"WHAHAHAHAHAT?! WHAHAHAT AHAHARE YOHOHOU TAHAHAHAHALKIHIHING ABOHOHOHOUT?!" Jeremy asked through his hysterical laughter.

"Didn't you hear? The animatronics are able to scan kids and make comments on certain objects and decorations now. For example: the patterns on your shirt!" Mike explained, poking the stomach underneath Jeremy's shirt.

Jeremy's eyes visibly widened, as he bit his lip.

"One of them might scan your body up and down, up and down, up and down..." Mike teased, pointing his index finger at Jeremy as he raised and lowered it to imitate the scanning. "-And they may find out some pretty interesting information:" Mike added as he lowered his hand down to Jeremy's stomach. Next, Mike focused his eyes on a specific tickle spot before lifting his head up and leaning his head in towards Jeremy's head.

"Mr. Security Guard?" Mike asked, in a silly Freddy voice that somewhat resembled Goofy's voice. "You have some very sensitive spots on your body. Are you ticklish?" Mike (Freddy) asked. Despite the small bits of nervous panic going through Jeremy's head, his body began betraying him by instinctively making him smile and giggle like a complete goof. So, Mike began poking, squeezing, and wiggling his fingers on Jeremy's stomach, ribs, and sides.

"DOHOHOHOHON'T! IHIHIHIT'S NAHAHAHAT FUHUHUHUNNY! IHIHIHIHIT'S CREHEHEHEHEHEPPY!" Jeremy yelled back.

Mike smirked and resorted to his Freddy Fazbear voice again. "Don't worry! I'm not gonna kill ya. I'm just gonna tickle you a little!" Mike replied as he skittered his fingers higher up on Jeremy's ribs. "What's that saying again?...Oh yeah! Coochy-Coochy-Coo!" Mike teased in his Freddy voice.

Next, Mike left his right hand at his ribs, and brought his left hand down to his belly again. Jeremy's laughter turned into cackles rather quickly. "Hey kids! Look! This security guard is very ticklish!" Mike (Freddy) exclaimed. "Next thing you know, children are gonna come running over and cheer excitedly as they watch a security guard get tickled!" Mike reenacted. "They'll giggle at the security guard stuck in Freddy's tickle trap, and they'll even give their own little pokes as well!" Mike reenacted further, adding in little pokes everywhere he could reach to add to the silliness. "It will be such a giggly mess, that someone may have to turn the machine off!" Mike added.

Immediately after that part, Mike stopped his fingers and pulled them away from him. Jeremy just flopped himself onto the floor, breathing in as much air as he could.

Jeremy was just about done for. He couldn't even IMAGINE such an embarrassing thought! "Next thing you know: You're getting laid off by your supervisor for 'being too ticklish'. Like you can control that, of course..." Mike concluded. Jeremy rolled his eyes, but giggled at the silly conclusion.

"Shuhuhut uhuhup...Yohohou wohohouldn't behe ahahahable to suhurvihihihive either..." Jeremy replied.

"Mm...Maybe not...Maybe yes, though..." Mike replied.

Mike only continued to giggle as he laid there on the ground. Looking around the room, Jeremy couldn't help but notice the flashing Wii remotes. Looking up at the TV, Jeremy noticed that the TV was still on! The Race statistics were playing on the screen as well! Jeremy looked down the list of places, and looked at the statistics on the bottom:

[11th | Luigi | DNF | +0 | 0pts]

[12th | King Boo| DNF | +0 | 0pts]

Well...So much for THAT challenge...

[tommo-stylinson]

50 questions you’ve never been asked before

@finelinedwalls tagged me to do this! Thanks so much, I love these!!! 

1. what is the colour of your hairbrush? orange and yellow and pink

2. a food you never eat? lasagna or jalapeno poppers

3. are you typically too warm or too cold? honestly depends on the time of the day. usually cold though

4. what were you doing 45 minutes ago? working out? or showering. I honestly could have been in the shower for like an hour and wouldn’t notice

5. what is your favourite candy bar? daily milk fruit and nut! and twix

6. have you ever been to a professional sports event? yeah, a shit ton of hockey games 

7. what is the last thing you said out loud? “ha-ha sucks” when I obnoxiously climbed over my brothers to get to my room

8. what is your favourite ice cream? my favourite normal ice cream flavour is strawberry but one time i had this raspberry lychee one and no ice cream will ever compare to how good it was

9. what was the last thing you had to drink? milk

10. do you like your wallet? it’s fine. it’s more of a card holder so i can put it in my front pocket when i go out cause i hate purses

11. what was the last thing you ate? vegan cheesecake with cherries

12. did you buy any new clothes last weekend? nah

13. the last sporting event you watched? the nba skills competition in like february so clearly i watch a lot of sports

14. what is your favourite flavour of popcorn? honestly? butter salt! like caramel corn and chicago mix are good but nothing beats a good butter salt

15. who is the last person you sent a text message to? my boss

16. ever go camping? yeah i live like 45 minutes from the rocky mountains so i go a lot

17. do you take vitamins? nope lol pretty sure my doc told me to take vitamin d cause no one gets sun here but like.... ma’am I have adhd you think i can remember to take a vitamin 😂

18. do you go to church every sunday? i've never been to church. I’ve been for like funerals and weddings but i’ve never “been to church”

19. do you have a tan? it’s april in canada i absolutely do not 😂

20. do you prefer Chinese food or pizza? sweet and sour pork is my favourite thing in the world, but as a whole, pizza. 

21. do you drink your soda with a straw? if i get it at a fast food restaurant yes, but otherwise just out of a can. i don’t really like pop that much though

22. what colour socks do you usually wear? black

23. do you ever drive above the speed limit? yeah. it’s super common here like everyone and their grandmas drive over the limit. you usually drive beside cops that are going 10km/h over on average. i won’t in like... playground zones and communities but we’ve got a lot of big freeways

24. what terrifies you? literally the only thing is like giant waves. not like tsunamis just like big ass waves like when you watch movies and the boat has to go over a wave that’s like 50 ft high? wtf is that. no. 

25. look to your left, what do you see? a wall. that’s so not interesting. it’s white has wood panels and a scratch-off map of the world on it

26. what chore do you hate? sweeping

27. what do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? steve irwin

28. what’s your favourite soda? root beer. it’s legit the only one i drink. 

29. do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thru? depends on the situation. if my fam is getting dinner then it’s drive thru

30. who’s the last person you talked to? my brothers

31. favourite cut of beef? y’know, for an albertan, i should really know the answer to this but i do not. i like steak- that’s all i got. 

32. last song you listened to? best song ever just ended as i was typing this and now it’s to be so lonely

33. last book you read? the last book i skim-read was find me (cmbyn sequel) but the last book i actually read was the martian back in 2016/2017

34. favourite day of the week? fridays and saturdays usually cause i go to my bf’s house for the weekend but like... covid... so now it’s sat/sun cause i don’t have to go to work

35. can you say the alphabet backwards? i tried to learn and gave up so nope

36. how do you like your coffee? black, especially if it’s hot coffee... if it’s iced i’ll get a little more creative but i genuinely really like black coffee

37. favourite pair of shoes? my orange converse

38. at what time do you normally go to bed? i usually put my computer away at like 12/12:30 but read until 2-3

39. at what time do you normally get up? if i work then i wake up at 9 and read until i get up at 10. if i don’t work then like 10:30/11

40. what do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? sunsets... sunrises are only good to me if i’ve stayed up all night to see them. otherwise it just means i’m up way too early

41. how many blankets are on your bed? two- april in canada is cold lads

42. describe your kitchen plates? they’re like turquoise and round

43. do you have a favourite alcoholic beverage? beer for sure. like a good friuty ipa. my city has a shit ton of micro-breweries so i’ve tried some wild flavours 

44. do you play cards? sometimes? it’s not like a past time of mine but if someone was like “let’s play cards” i’d be down

45. what colour is your car? silver

46. can you change a tire? in theory? yes.... with my dad teaching me? yes.... in an emergency? yet to be seen

47. what is your favourite state/province? my fave province is alberta, but like british columbia is a close second

48. favourite job you’ve ever had? working at a camp for kids with disabilities- especially the few years my job was focused on kids with complex behaviours 

49. how did you get your biggest scar? i sliced my wrist open hopping a chain-link fence while drunk like a year and a half ago.... it’s not that long but it’s in a weird triangle shape cause two different wires cut and then crossed over so it looks kinda cool

50. what did you do today that made someone else happy? i work at dq so i assume that someone was happy with their ice cream 

imma tag @that-anxious-blonde  @chocolatepepsifloat @larryiswhatilivefor @siriussilly if you want to! no pressure!! 

[beardedmrbean]

I mainly ask as I am Pro-small business. My main concern is that it's likely to stifle growth and competition in the market. I do not believe that a business (especially a small one; think less than 50 employees.) should simply evaporate because it cannot pay a mandated minimum wage. I feel that if you are going to enact a high minimum wage, there should be less barriers to actually start and get a business get off the ground.

I rambled, if you want to skip over my thought process jump to the end

_____________________

That'd be why I said arguments against would be case sensitive.

I was the ass man at a pizza place where the goal for daily labor was 15% +/- 3% didn't really want to dip to 12% or spike to 18% but those were the points going under 12% quality suffers over 18% people are bored unless it's morning and prep is being done or late and closing is being done.

If they'd paid out the 10-12hr that would have been a living wage at the time prices would have gone through the roof and the place would have imploded.

Both oven on working at pretty much peak capacity we could pull in 5-7 grand on a Friday (this was like 18 years ago) with all the other overhead there was really only so much that could go out to the employees if the place was going to stay open and competitive.

It's a touchy subject because I think everyone should be able to live off of a job that they do full time 36-44 hours a week, be nice if it were less but that's kinda where we're at right now so I'm going with it.

But you're also right about startups and small businesses, that'd be why I wouldn't want to see the required minimum go up too high, like I said before inflation is a problem which just winds up making everyone poorer.

I'm glad I'm not an economist, stuff hurts my brain because I try to do my best to see as many angles as I can but there's so many of them.

Got a friend that works at a hospital not entirely sure what all she does but it takes some specialized education iirc and she was talking about quitting and going to get a job at Target because she could make more hourly there and with far less stress.

I think if you're looking for a rebuttal your small business comment is about the best rebuttal that there is, that and startups.

As an alternative to the higher pay at the onset the people starting it should go into it with a plan to increase wages as soon as it becomes financially feasible should be an agreement with the starting staff, alternatively if things go up and down good months should spell bonuses for the employees or something like that.

That's more in the 'quality employee acquisition/retention' department though.

_______________________

I don't know if I've given any real clarity here or if I just rambled so I'll do a short version.

Mandatory minimum wage isn't a terrible thing, but it shouldn't be set at a point where it will kill off businesses. It's been where it is now for a long time and it is due for a bump, but not a bump like the one people are saying should be mandated because that would generate a big negative for the entire country.

Think the number out of the congressional budget office (people that track these things) was that the $15 minimum wage would have lifted 900,000 families out of poverty, which sounds good until you get to the it would also send 1.5 million families into poverty.

I was wrong, it would cost 1.4 million jobs

The Budgetary Effects of the Raise the Wage Act (CBO official report, I started it but then went cross-eyed)

Congressional Budget After $15 Minimum Wage

According to the new government report from the CBO, a $15 minimum wage would lift 900,000 Americans out of poverty but lead to the destruction of roughly 1.4 million jobs.

Lot of those 1.4 million jobs that would be lost are going to be small businesses shuttering.

So I suppose that's about the best rebuttal you could hope for. Even the federal government thinks it'll kill jobs.

CBO is 100% non partisan much like the Senate Parliamentarian who you've probably never heard of and if you have it's only recently because the Dems are pissed they're forcing them to follow the rules of the house.

CBO just does the numbers and what they mean

[bapdirt]

hey, i'm not sure if you're still taking these but if you still do the otp questions, can you do them for himup and younglo? :) if not, just ignore this, haha.

1) Who rocks the Ferris Wheel seat and who flips out and begs them to stop?Himup: Jongup rocks the seat, Himchan yells and hits his arm until he stops.Younglo: Zelo rocks the seat by accident and freaks himself out, Youngjae starts doing it to see him freak out.2) Who is always horny and will have sex at any time, at any place and at any time?Himup: They’re both up for it, Jongup likes doing it in riskier spots though.Younglo: Youngjae likes to get Zelo excited until he’s willing to sneak off to have sex, or hurry home.3) Who is more into taking showers/baths together? Who tries to make it relaxing and who tries to make it sexy time?Himup: Himchan likes the baths, it gives him time to wind down with Jongup. Jongup likes the shower so he can do a little dance while he listens to music, but he’s the one to start washing Himchan’s back, next thing you know they’re fucking.Younglo: zelo likes to have a bath at the end of the day, sees it as a chance to get off with Youngjae before bed.

4) Who likes to walk around the house naked and who tells the other to go put some clothes on?Himup: Jongup really doesn’t care for clothes around the house. Himchan doesn’t mind.Younglo: Zelo walks around naked, Youngjae asks him to at least wear shorts, his mother would catch a heart attack if she knew what Youngjae was seeing on a daily basis.5) Who sleeps on the couch when they get into a fight?Himup: Jongup likes to sleep on the couch anyway, and he likes to give Himchan his space after an argument.Younglo: Zelo stomps off to the couch even though Youngjae asks him not to.6) Who takes photos of the other while they sleep?Himup: Himchan has a folder just for Jongup. Jongup, unknown to Himchan, has more pictures.Younglo: Youngjae likes to take videos of himself fucking with Junhong and sends it to be group chat.7) Who said “I love you” first? and who ends their arguments in a fight with “Because I love you”?Himup: Jongup said it first, he was drunk and honest. Himchan ends the argument with that sentence, Jongup folds most of the time.Younglo: Youngjae admitted it first because it’s just how he feels and he knows Zelo feels the same. He also ends his arguments with that line, but it’s more sarcastic than anything.8) Who likes to wear the others sweatshirts?Himup: Himchan has the habit of stealing clothes, period, so Jongup ends up with half his sweatshirts missing.Younglo: Zelo tries to wear Youngjae’s sweatshirts but only the oversized ones fit him correctly. 9) Who wakes the other up in the middle of the night to tell them a cool dream they had? Who has the most nightmares, and who sings them back to sleep after?Himup: Jongup might wake Himchan up if the dream stays on his mind. Himchan has the most nightmares and Jongup talks until he falls back to sleep.Younglo: Zelo wakes Youngjae up with weird dreams and nightmares. Youngjae winds him back to sleep.10) Who is more likely to cheat?Himup: Neither.Younglo: Neither. They both have trust issues already.11) Who makes fun of the other for having a crush on them, and who has to remind them that they are in a relationship?Himup: Himchan makes fun of Jongup for having a crush on him, Jongup doesn’t even care to remind him that they’re together.

Younglo: Youngjae teases Zelo about how infatuated he was in the beginning, Zelo reminds him that Youngjae confessed to him first.12) Who starts a food fight in the kitchen?

Himup: Jongup starts it, Himchan ends it.

Younglo: Youngjae starts it and is somehow surprised when Zelo fights back.

13) Who initiates duets? and who is the better singer?

Himup: Himchan tries to start it but Jongup isn’t having it. Their voices compliment each other.

Younglo: Youngjae tries to get Zelo to sing, he thinks he actually has a really nice voice.

14) Who starts the hand holding? Who grabs the others butt? Who slides their arm around their waist? Who likes to put their fingers in the belt loops?

Himup: Himchan for like all of those. Jongup likes hand holding in private and putting an arm around Himchan’s shoulder.

Younglo: Youngjae attacks this boy with affection all the time. When Zelo tries to do the same Youngjae sometimes rejects him.

15) Who likes writes the others name on their wrist?

Himup: Jongup likes to write Himchan’s name in messy scrawl and then wash it away not too long after.

Younglo: Zelo writes Youngjae across his own palms and wrists, likes to send pictures to him if he can work up the nerve. Youngjae calls him an idiot but saves all the pictures anyway.

16) Who is more seductive when they are drunk? and who is louder in bed?

Himup: Himchan. He talks a lot. Jongup is shy but he’ll make some noise when he’s really into it.

Younglo: Zelo, though they’re both on the more quiet side, whispers and soft moans.

17) Who is more protective?

Himup: Himchan, overly so. Jongup doesn’t mind.

Younglo: Youngjae because he’s been watching over Zelo for a long time. Zelo has a mean streak when that childish jealousy hits though.

18) Who talks to the other while they are sleeping?

Himup: Himchan. Never. Stops. Talking. Jongup’s said this before himself lmao

Younglo: Youngjae ends up talking to himself until he finally notices that Zelo has drifted off to sleep. Then he’ll stop.

19) Who drives and who has the window seat?

Himup: Himchan drives, Jongup stares out the window, music playing.

Younglo: Youngjae drives and Zelo watches him, records him while driving. Lots of half finished videos of Youngjae’s smiling face before he slaps the phone out of his hand.

20) Who falls asleep in the others lap and who carries them to bed?

Himup: Himchan falls asleep in Jongup’s lap while they watch something on tv, or while Jongup is playing on his phone. He doesn’t move him, he’ll stay still until Himchan wakes up and drags them both to bed.

Younglo: Zelo likes to curl himself up in Youngjae’s lap as much as possible. A lot of time on the weekends is spent like this.

21) Who cuts the others hair?

Himup: Jongup let Himchan cut his hair once and never again. Their stylists is the only reason he stopped letting him do it.

Younglo: Neither. Youngjae wouldn’t dare let Zelo cut his hair and he wouldn’t want to mess with Junhong’s either.

22) Who is super bad at sexting? and who sends them encouraging messages throughout the day?

Himup: Jongup forgets to respond to sexts, he doesn’t mean to, Himchan gets embarrassed if it’s too much and tells Jongup to stop sometimes. Himchan sends encouraging messages throughout the day, Jongup responds to those.

Younglo: Zelo is bad at sexting, frets over what to send back if he can’t send nudes. Youngjae wants him to widen his vocabulary. Zelo sends encouraging messages and silly pictures to cheer Youngjae up.

23) Who thinks they are not good enough for the others love? and who’s more afraid of losing the other? Who thinks they keep messing up, only for the other to tell them they don’t need to worry?

Himup: They both of times where they doubt they’re enough of the other. It’s easier for Himchan to express the way he feels to Jongup, but Himchan has to watch for certain signs when it comes to Jongup.

Younglo: Zelo has moments when he wants to back out so he acts out of character, self deprecating jokes and low moods. Youngjae assures him that he’s good enough, that’s why he’s with him.

24) Who starts random slow dancing with the other in the kitchen? Who holds the other just above the ground and kisses them?

Himup: Jongup starts slow dancing with Himchan in the kitchen just to make him laugh, but then they end up swaying there for an hour to one of their playlists. Dinner burns. They don’t pick each other up.

Younglo: They like to start slow dancing with each other, but Youngjae does it seriously and Zelo gets embarrassed. He picks Youngjae up just to spite him.

25) Who says shitty puns and sex jokes just to see the other giggle and blush?

Himup: Himchan has a dirty mouth, okay? Always ready with the sex jokes, but he ends up blushing and giggling at the end of them with Jongup, too.

Younglo: Youngjae has the occasional sex joke, but shitty ass puns aplenty. Junhong hides his face if it’s too much but he’ll have a dirty joke to tell at the wrong time himself.

26) Who kissed first?

Himup: They went in at the same time. One look shared and they kinda went for it. Their teeth knocked together on the first try.

Younglo: Youngjae asks to kiss him first, Junhong turns his face away to laugh each time Youngjae tried until he got cursed at.

27) Who orders take out at two in a morning? and who wakes the other up at three in the morning to go downstairs with them to get a glass of water because it’s too dark?

Himup: Jongup orders food at two in the morning because McDonald’s is open 24/7 near the apartment. What else does he have to do. Himchan makes him get a glass of water since he always wants to be up at ass o’clock in the morning.

Younglo: Zelo orders food, Youngjae adds on his own stuff so he doesn’t mind when the delivery man comes knocking at weird times. Zelo begs Youngjae for a glass of water when it’s too dark.

28) Who writes poems/stories and love songs about the other? Do they sing the songs they write for them?

Himup: Jongup writes about Himchan when he’s feeling particularly affectionate but Himchan isn’t there, or he doesn’t want to say what’s on his mind. He doesn’t sing them though. Maybe.

Younglo: Zelo would write about Youngjae a lot, too embarrassed to say so. Might put one line into a song that’s he’s releasing if it isn’t obvious. Youngjae likes to sing his songs to Zelo, though.

29) Who does some crazy stunt to try and impress the other and who ends up driving them to the emergency room after it backfires?

Himup: Himchan tends to do stupid shit and end up hurting himself. Jongup never has to take him to the hospital, but he has to work kinks out of Himchan’s back later.

Younglo: Zelo had to go to the doctor after pulling a muscle. Youngjae drove there in a frenzy after Junhong tried to do a triple back flip

30) Who is embarrassed when they have to wear their glasses and who thinks they look super cute?

Himup: JONGUP. He thinks they’re a hassle to wear but his prescribed glasses are goofy. Himchan wants him to wear them more often, has like a hundred pictures of him with them on.

Younglo: Neither of them are embarrassed. They like glasses actually.

[helltoraze-a-blog]

deeks/venna for the ship meme thing

SEND ME A SHIP  &  I’LL TELL YOU :

Who would be the big spoon/little spoon?

alright let’s be real here, Ravenna is a whopping 5 feet  &  Deeks is actually a foot  &  a half taller than her  &  pls let’s not even talk about her small frame compared to Deeks’  so clearly she’s the little spoon.  though Ravenna usually just tangles her herself around Deeks  &  makes it really hard for him to get out of bed in the morning.

Who would wake up first?

Deeks most likely but Ravenna won’t be in the bed much longer, she may not have to go to work for another couple of hours but she likes spending this with him.  while he gets ready for work, she gets ready for a run  &  along the way she steals kisses  &  tweaks his tie or smoothes out a wrinkle on his shirt.  &  of course, she teases the hell out of him.

Do they have nicknames for each other?

you bet your ass they do, aside from the common names ( i.e. baby, babe, love, etc. ) Deeks’ tends to call her babygirl, princess, my love, my girl  &  little one ( she doesn’t mind it too much in private but she doesn’t stand for it in public ). Ravenna prefers to call him handsome, gigantor ( only when she needs him to get her something she can’t reach, which is often ),  bestiola which is Italian  &  translates to  ‘ beastie ’  &  obviously daddy.

How do they apologize after an argument?

they’re both too stubborn to apologize quickly, still a little heated  &  not willing to be the first one to break.  eventually, one of them comes around  &  apologizes, Ravenna often brings food or a nice tie  &  Deeks brings wine or flowers.  they talk things through this time around  &  then have some great cuddles . . . after make-up sex.

What would they be like as parents?

they would both be nervous in the beginning  &  each with their own reasons.  due to some past traumas  &  experiences, it’s hard for Ravenna to become  &  stay pregnant; the fear of her losing the baby would consume her thoughts all 9 months.  Deeks, on the other hand, would be most concerned about becoming like his father ( Venna would reassure him daily that it could never happen ).  in the end, when their baby is born things will be a little chaotic at first but they fall into an easy routine, each sharing in the responsibilities  &  working together effortlessly after about a month.  their baby will be spoiled with love  &  affection  &  a whole lot of kisses  &  wouldn’t want for a thing.

Who is more romantic?

while Ravenna is a romantic, i think Deeks is more romantic.  maybe because on the outside he doesn’t exactly scream  ‘  romance  ’  considering what he does but he has a big heart hidden under all those walls so when he does something romantic  –  big or small  –  Ravenna appreciates it  &  cherishes it.

What sort of gifts do they get for each other?

Ravenna likes to buy him ties or some new clothes or gadgets when she goes out shopping ( which is more common than you think ).  she’s given him the pocket watch that matches her locket which are the 2 most valuable items in her entire life.  as for birthdays  &  holidays, she puts so much more time  &  thought into finding him the best gift  or gifts  because she enjoys the look on his face when opens the gifts.  Deeks sometimes brings home flowers or wine or chocolates which Ravenna always loves.  he tends to do that same for birthdays  &  holidays as Ravenna  &  he has a knack for finding gifts she didn’t even know she wanted.

Who gets jealous easiest?

they both get a little jealous but Ravenna feels it way easier.  her deep-seated fear of abandonment causes her anxiety to flare up  &   the little green monster to take the mic in her head.  she trusts Deeks  &  loves him with her whole heart which is why it gets her so anxious to see another woman flirting with him  &  the only way she can express it is through jealousy.

Who gets more excited for events e.g.. Birthdays, Christmas?

RAVENNA !!  she loves to go all out with decorating, keeping it relatively elegant around the house but each room is given something.  it’s her favorite thing to do, she helped her mother decorate when she was a kid  &  she enjoys doing it so much because it’s a tradition  &  creates a lovely atmosphere around the event.

Who is the most adventurous?

probs Ravenna, she likes to explore  &  wander  &  sometimes it gets her into trouble because she wandered somewhere she shouldn’t have.  she’s also an adrenaline junkie  &  quite the daredevil so she’s always looking for something exciting to do  &  the more dangerous the better.

Who is the most protective?

they’re both protective but Deeks is more protective, his line of work making Ravenna the perfect way to get to him.  when things get messy, she gets a bodyguard  &  8 out of 10 times it’s foolproof but she’s been taken  &  tortured before so she doesn’t argue with him about this.  it also doesn’t help that she’s so tiny compared to him so it’s almost automatic for him to be more protective of her.

What would they have been like as childhood sweethearts?

it honestly depends upon when they met because they’ve both had shitty childhoods.  if it had been anytime before Ravenna was 13, probs a lot of fluff  &  happiness.  anytime between the ages of 14-18 it would have been very toxic  —  on both ends  —  &  would have ended very badly.

Who uses all the hot water?

Ravenna, she just can help it.

Who would accidentally set the kitchen on fire whilst cooking?

Ravenna has never accidentally set anything on fire when cooking in her entire life so it’s Deeks who isn’t allowed in the kitchen without her present.

Who initiates sexy times the most?

it’s pretty equal but probably Ravenna considering she likes to tease Deeks to no end.  she isn’t known to start something  &  not end it but she does like to see how far she can push Deeks before he snaps.

Who is more dominant?

DEACON JAMES !!  though don’t be confused Ravenna doesn’t just take orders she also gives them but in bed 9 out of 10 times Deeks is in control.  when Ravenna has the control in bed she does relish every minute of it but she doesn’t want control often.

What would they do if the other one was hurt?

lmfao the person who hurt the other is a dead man walking, they both have powerful friends and means to get the information needed to exact revenge.  it’s scary what they would do if the other one was hurt.  though their first  &  main concern is making sure the other gets better.

Who gives nose/forehead kisses?

Deeks because Ravenna can’t reach his nose or forehead but she does give him bicep, shoulder, chin  &  chest kisses when she can.

What their biggest fight was/will be about:

considering how they started out, Deeks holding her captive forever, their biggest fight was  (  &  still is )  her freedom.  since they’ve worked past the initial hatred  &  now love each other Ravenna has freedom but when Deeks implements bodyguards or puts her on house arrest without talking to her about it a fight is bound to happen  &  often she sleeps in a different room.

BONUS #1: Song to sum them up?

the namesake of our verse,  Tale As Old As Time  &  also  Gangsta  by Kehlani kinda sums up our lovely little ship

BONUS #2: A head canon?

we’ve talked about it before but Ravenna going through a really bad depressive episode  &  Deeks taking care of her.  Though if you want a headcanon that we haven’t talked about, how about one where Ravenna has to go almost undercover for Deeks  &  in turn has to flirt with this big boss man to get the information needed  &  of course it disgusts Ravenna to have another man she a) doesn’t like, b) doesn’t know  &  most importantly c) isn’t Deeks touch her in such a way but it bring out tension  &  anger between them.  like this could happen at any time after they start to realize their feelings for each other but imagine it’s at the culmination of their sexual tension  &  this is how they finally break it  &  admit their feelings to each other  &  finally just get together.  just pls give them to me !!!!!!!

BOTTOM LINE: Do I ship it?

hmmmmm i don’t rea — FUCK YES I DO !!! IT’S AN OG SHIP  &  ONE THAT I WILL SHIP FOREVER !!!

SEND ME A SHIPaccepting  |  no longer accepting@sorrowsfate

[shytiff]

Small August Wins

1 - DL, did my part for PKP, read a bit about leprosy reaction (PKP related), watched a cute movie tune in for love, ara stayed over at my home, edited 1 pld article

2 - exercised a bit, edited 3 pld articles, DL, finished ppt tinpus PKP, walked to the nearby lake with ara, ate nasgor smoked chicken (been a while!) and jco donuts and my tummy is happy, felt afraid with DV exam huft. I hope I can prepare myself properly

3 - DL, edited 1 article, went to school together w ara, deep fried by dr adhi for my minicex (but i am grateful for the opportunity), emir took a while to pick me up (he left home 1530 and arrived 1715) so i did some status work, arrived at home super hungry but moms food is delicious and wow glucose is finally in (after previously supported by nasi uduk and 1 jco donut) and the pain from today sort of fades away.

4 - DL, tried to study as much as i could (the panic is real), went to kencana to get dr adhis signature at 12 but he replied my chat at about 1330 🙃 , finished self reflection, group called with my group for exam prep

5 - did not DL bcs i fell asleep!! Thank god for streak freeze, met up with dr adhi in poli regarding minicex bcs turns out he brought my status etc, hes very kind 🥺 dr yudo kindly took his time to answer questions via wa voicenote even though he had a tiring day 🥺 bless all the kind people in this world

6 - DL, alhamdulillah passed the exam with dr sondang and dr larissa even though i was being a dumb ass student (thankfully theyre patient enough). Honestly panicked during the morning, i was super afraid. Searched some drug dosage for renata. I hope she passes the remed!!

7 - slept and lazed all day :( edited 1 article, dv closing. Managed to say thanks to dr yudo even though i was lowkey near tears bcs i cant for the life of me say something even mildy emotional, DL at like 15 mins before midnight

8 - finally at lvl 3 DL by cheating with my notes lmaoo, ate burgers and half pizza by dcheese pizza but had mencret2 the next day lmaooo, watched bosscha virtual sky sightseeing

9 - DL, watched Summer Vacation, edited 2 articles, put some sheet mask on (the numbers surely diminished since my cousin took some 🙂 ), pretty much watched youtube all day. At night i dreamed going to a villa that kinda looks like matamori, and the villa near it was also booked by other groups of friend, and i was recording snow falling from the sky and snow on the cliffs, but there was also a snake under the bed, and writing patients resume -_-(?)

10 - DL, read pem psikiatri cbt batch 1 optima, 25 CBT PADI, a fruitful 2,5 hr discussion with dr Heriani, SpKJ

11 - DL, poli with mendel hari and dr Khamelia, SpKJ, mustered some courage to do the ppt, phoned the patient to ask a little bit more, fell asleep and thank god i’ve prayed isya

12 - DL, lazied and played get rich, felt sick and was sick, nose congested, head starting to hurt, i dont know what is it that triggered my emotions but when my dad asked "tiff kok bersin2?" i felt like i have no privacy and they were too intruding and i wept silently in my room (bcs ppl outside can hear) and yall my nose just goes 100% blocked. aint accepting air today. Massaged my face around the sinus area until i can somehow breathe nicely and fall asleep. (took about half and hour of snot cleaning, drinking and mulling around)

13 - since i felt bad abt lazying i started my day early. Woke up at 5. Put on tretinoin, 15 CBT PADI, DL, naskah psikiatri WIP (Work in progress). It rained today. The sky was grey half of the day, which I LOVE. I felt better and more cheery, especially at abt 4-5 pm when it was raining hard and im snuggled in bed. The laptop stand arrived and bitch it was fucking amazing. My back and neck muscles felt less awkward and/or sore working at my ergonomically-awful table and chair combo turned ok thanks to laptop stand!!

14 - DL, poli with dr cika, crashed aras place (drank thai tea, ate flip burger and sausages), it felt refreshing to be in a different place rather than seeing my room all day everyday. Afterwards ara indah and i ate po noodle bar, the taste was kind of herbal (not brothy) in a good way. Tried some sort of gyoza, it was good too. Juan got accepted at USU civic engineering. Went to atikahs place, passed a red light and i got ppl a bit annoyed lmao sorry :(((, talked with atikah until 1-2ish pm

15 - richeese and fried rice for brunch time, went back home (felt socially refreshed!) to see 2 bottles of sbux coffee i ordered, claras nastar and vit d supplement from tokped. Did RPS and ikhtisar for naskah. DL. Sbux' coffee still upsets my stomach lmao but it did keep me awake and focused enough til 11 pm

16 - DL, after staying over at friends place i feel.suer content to be just at home. Ate while watching erna limdaughs vids, sleeeept

17 - DL, naskah WIP, whipped myself to go do naskah by drinking caramel macchiato and playing coffee - bts. It tasted better when i hear jks soothing voice

18 - DL, finally panicked a bit and did ppt, read a bit abt bipolar, chugged hazelnut dolce latte and somehow its not bitter anymore it actually tasted good. Talked w mendel and hari a bit abt the patient

19 - the dr actually showed up to zoom while i was opening other screen and i didnt realize (ultra embarrassing!!!) basically my diagnosis for axis I and II were wrong. She was kindly explaining and i was more dissapointed with myself but at least its all over? Talked w hansel a bit. Revised a bit of naskah. Submitted hardcopy of naskah and refleksi to mbak Asma. Went to ara. DL, ate gwen's dimsum (quite good and fulfilling). Planned to go to kashiwa but we ended up getting bakmi akiaw. Went back "home" to DM, took only 35 mins.

20 - DL, slept half of the day since im on my period (what even is daily structure), woke up in the evening, decided to start “the folk of the air” series. Binged the first book in one go, from 8 pm to 1 am lmaoo

21 - DL, finished the series at night. it’s nice but not as good as six of crows duology. bts comeback with dynamite!! :) i love them. its scary to think they are still progressing and going up and getting better stats. When will it all stop?

22 - discussion with dr natalia spKJ at 7.30 am, DL, drank matcha latte at starbucks airport hub (been a while! It doesnt taste quite good as i remembered) while backing up HD data at drive and some padi CBT (finished TO 3. After all this time, only to 3?!), felt a bit better after i went out, read a falling cohabitation again

23 - DL, danced to baepsae, slept in the afternoon (my body is too weak nowadays)

24 - DL, psychiatry closing, 1 pamela reif vid, 2P (CBT PADI)

25 - DL, made latar belakang for propeks nemo

26 - DL, 4P, rapat nemo

27 - DL, met up with atikah pupuy @ toska, tried yogurt and fruit, mac and cheese, vegan mentai rice and had dinner @ bakmi gm. mom somehow told (and allowed) me to go back home (it was 9 am and i was abt to stay over at atikah’s)

28 - DL, i dont feel like doing anything helppp, i know there’s stuff that im supposed to do but i cant bring myself to do it. a week will pass by, a month, and before you know it exam will arrive

29 - DL, ordered burgushi, i literally have no strength to go at static bike (can only do for a couple of mins), didnt rly do anything else bcs im in a slump nowadays

30 - its scary that the month is almost over again. my life just goes away like that but i still dont feel like doing anything, DL, tried to follow some dances on youtube to move my body

31 - DL, 2A, 4P

[fromis-me-blog]

Fromis as Youtubers

Disclaimer: In this world the Fromis girls are all aged-up, as the youngest is in high school instead of middle school and 2000-line are freshmen in college. Enjoy!!

P.S: I can’t edit for my life I’m so sorry for the bad edits

Lee Saerom

➥ One of the pioneers of makeup and fashion tutorials on K-Youtube

➥ Known for her on-point eyeliner tutorials because she explains in a really easy to understand way

➥ Nowadays she’s starting to get into yoga so she makes “How to be Healthy” videos bUT no one buys it because she talks about healthy living while having a STACK of chips in the background (tbf she does exercise regularly)

➥ She keeps getting invited to fashion events but usually declines because she gets anxious about her fashion style

➥ Has a collab channel with Hayoung where they post their daily vlogs or some similar domestic crap

➥ Roommate: Song Hayoung (Youtuber, college student/animation major, freelance artist)

➥ Channel Name: romsae | Subscriber Count: 3M

➥ Top Video: Top 10 Things You SHOULDN’T Do With Your Eyeliner

Song Hayoung

➥ Does storytime videos using animations but shows her face here and there (kinda like sWoozie’s videos)

➥ Her videos are very relatable and funny, often revolving around her mess of a student life

➥ She started off posting original songs with her guitar but wanted to share life stories that’s why she’s what she is now (but she does post her songs in her Instagram or Twitter)

➥ Her fans know (No thanks to Saerom) that she professionally trained in hip-hop dance before but she gets really shy when she talks about that

➥ Whenever she poses for her fans she usually imitates the cartoon character Peko-chan so it became a nickname of hers

➥ Roommate: Lee Saerom (Youtuber, beauty guru)

➥ Channel Name: SHY girl | Subscriber Count: 820k

➥ Top Video: MY COLLEGE PROFESSOR SHAT IN FRONT OF THE CLASS

Jang Gyuri

➥ Mostly does storytime vlogs; her life never gets boring so she has new content almost every day

➥ Keeps doing livestreams on Periscope because she speaks more naturally there

➥ The first few videos she posted were filled with “My grandfather didn’t allow me to do this before” so it became an inside joke inside her fandom

➥ Slowly gaining more popularity after being featured in a FBE/Youtubers React video for her cuteness (It was Youtubers React to Aegyo and EVERYBODY was all over her eyesmile)

➥ Sometimes posts skits as well

➥ Roommate/s: Bae Eunyoung (College student/business major) | Yoo Jina (College student/architecture major)

➥ Channel Name: Gyuri Jang | Subscriber Count: 580k

➥ Top Video: What NOT to say to East Asian Kids

Park Jiwon

➥ Originally a viner and her first few videos on YT were compilations of her vine edits (all her friends make fun of her for this but she’s proud of her work... except when she watches them because CRINGE)

➥ Now she mainly does react videos?? She usually reacts to underrated videos (from funny videos to conspiracies) that blow up because of her

➥ Occasionally does Lets Plays too but only for horror games (because she likes screaming)

➥ Sometimes does pranks (mostly on her roommate Chaeyoung #rip)

➥ She’s a popular meme all over the internet. Literally everything she does becomes a huge meme (she’s a 9gag favorite)

➥ Her videos’ intro is her screaming

➥ Roommate: Lee Chaeyoung (Youtuber, college student/law major)

➥ Channel Name: GWon | Subscriber Count: 2M

➥ Top Video: Jiwon Reacts to Her Vine Compilations

No Jisun

➥ Makes domestic videos like Rosanna Pansino

➥ Known for her pretty DIYs. She sometimes makes slime videos but she HATES them because she make a big mess after

➥ She also makes unique cooking vids. She mixes the MOST BIZARRE food together and make them taste EDIBLE?? Like one time she deepfries a chicken leg then dips it in a CHEESE and MAYO combination, and everybody?? liked?? it??

➥ She didn’t want to monetize her content but everybody wanted her aesthetic products so she opened up an online shop

➥ She’s in a culinary course and everybody is scared of her weird ass experiments

➥ Roommate: Lee Dahee (College student/culinary major, freelance singer)

➥ Channel Name: No Jisun | Subscriber Count: 2.5M

➥ Top Video: lettuce + ketchup + fish = ?? || cooking experiment #5

Lee Seoyeon

➥ Mainly a music youtuber (song covers, dance covers, freestyle raps ─ she’s very multitalented) but often posts vlogs

➥ Her fans wanted to know why she didn’t try to make it as an idol and she said that she did train in an agency before but didn’t like how her artistic freedom was kept from her

➥ She used to cover up her eyebags but after opening up about how it made her anxious, she slowly started to leave it as it is

➥ Used to do Lets Plays but she just LAUGHED throughout the games so she stopped

➥ Collabs with a lot of people who people didn’t know were good singers

➥ Roommate: Yoon Jiwoo (College student/music major)

➥ Channel Name: SEOYEON | Subscriber Count: 500k

➥ Top Video: Sunday Morning - Maroon 5 (Acoustic Cover by SEOYEON & GWON)

Lee Chaeyoung

➥ The “Challenge/Tag Youtuber”

➥ Cinnamon Challenge, Spicy Noodle Challenge, Try Not to Laugh Challenge, BFF Tag, Girlfriend Tag (she doesn’t have a girlfriend so she did it with Jiwon)─ you name it, she has it

➥ Not all her attempts are successful though, especially not with Jiwon as a roommate. In some videos, half of the time was spent on Chaeyoung chasing Jiwon who stole the brush she needed

➥ She talks in a very slurrish and not understandable way so she doesn’t do livestreams

➥ Her fans have to talk her out of a dangerous challenge,, When they went to Paris she wanted to do a “Fall from the Sky Challenge”... You’d see how that would have turned out

➥ Roommate: Park Jiwon (Youtuber, college student/psychology major)

➥ Channel Name: CHALLENGE CHAE | Subscriber Count: 790k

➥ Top Video: Roommate Does My Make-up Challenge (MESSY)

Lee Nakyung

➥ A world-famous gamer

➥ Her most popular Lets Play series is Overwatch (mostly because it’s also her favorite so she gets REALLY hyped in them)

➥ Whenever she’s agitated she starts full on SCREECHING at her screen (”Idiot why did you go there!!! NO FCKER THE BASE IS GOING TO OH MY GOD STUPID”)

➥ If she doesn’t post serious Lets Plays she plays the most obnoxious games in the internet

➥ Used to cosplay video game characters but hated having to exert effort all the time so she quit (but her photos are in the internet)

➥ Roommate: Jo Yoori (College student/piano major) but she doesn’t go to college

➥ Channel Name: kyunglixe | Subscriber Count: 10M

➥ Top Video: WHAT NOT TO DO WHILE PLAYING | overwatch #13

Baek Jiheon

➥ Started in Instagram with studyblr that’s why she has a loyal fanbase

➥ Now she does aesthetic Study With Me, What’s in my Backpack, Book Reviews, etc. videos

➥ Her videos are ALWAYS in low saturation AND in pastel or pink and purple. There is NO in between

➥ Sponsored by A LOT of stationery brands that liked her videos, that’s why she has an unending supply of washi tapes and blank notebooks

➥ Occasionally posts vlogs whenever there’s something interesting in school or if her friends come up with something stupid

➥ Roommate: n/a, still in high school but is planning to move in with Nakyung and Yoori

➥ Channel Name: studynread | Subscriber Count: 900k

➥ Top Video: How I Take Notes!

Extra:

↳ Aspiring voice actress Seo Herin is also planning to move in with Dahee and Jisun when she graduates high school

↳ Lee Sian and Jo Youngju live in the room next to Chaeyoung and Jiwon’s so they usually visit over and things go REALLY messy

↳ HaRom is easily one of the most popular ships in the community

↳ Chaeyoung and Nakyung collaborated for a gaming video and people started to ship them

↳ Gyuri sometimes makes videos in the wee hours of the night and over the audio you can hear Eunyoung screaming “SHUT THE FCK UP GO TO SLEEP”

↳ Seoyeon tried to collaborate with Bin Haneul but they played Mario Kart and didn’t finish anything

↳ Jiheon and Jisun collaborated for a DIY video and everybody was BLINDED with the amount of organization and aesthetic in their video...

↳ Don’t tell Nakyung but Jiheon’s better than her in story-based games

[steamishot]

Some type of normalcy

today, my SIL’s bro came to hang out with us. he’s visiting from SF and it’s his first time being down here since my SIL and bro bought their house. along with my mom and grandma, we tried going to kenneth hahn park, which was closed (or at least the only main road leading into the park was closed off). we then tried going to baldwin hills scenic overlook- again, it was closed. since we were already on the westside, i decided to then take them to UCLA. we parked at ralphs and walked over to the botanical gardens. it was my SIL and her brother’s first time on campus. 

my grandma has been so bored/restless being at home, and at the same time she is quite frightened of COVID. i was kinda disappointed by how easily she gave up today, because she barely made it into the garden to sit down, and ended up not seeing the rest of it. i felt confused because pre-COVID, she used to take like 30 min walks around our neighborhood/hiking trail daily. my grandma isn’t super old and is quite healthy physically, but she does hold herself back mentally. i compared her (late 70s) to matt’s grandma (late 80s), and i see how fear/anxiety doesn’t hold matt’s grandma back. as they say in running, your mentality is half the game. i imagine it to be similar with older folks and walking (but could be wrong). last time i hung out with matt’s family at venice canals, his grandma was able to keep up walking with us for like 30+ min. 

one thing my family (mom’s side) does differently is that we tend to coddle. we are scared to overwork or overexert. we give in to emotions and not push harder. i’m conditioned to coddle old people, like my grandma. i always slow down for her, never let her carry anything. my mom now takes care of her like a child. in contrast, when i first saw how matt’s family treated his grandma, i thought it was disrespectful. like, when we went to go pick her up for the first time from her senior apartment, he stayed in the driver’s seat as she was coming towards the car. he let her open the door herself and get in the car herself, and lets her carry her bags herself. he said that old people have to maintain their independence or else they’ll just let themselves go. and i’m impressed by how independent/strong and calm his grandma is. when i saw her last in april, she said she would be content if she has 1-2 more years to live in such a tranquil manner. it takes a certain personality to not hand hold, and to sometimes give tough love. and i see there can be positive results because of that. 

work: i can officially clock in overtime as of two weeks ago, an extra 5 hours/week. i’m not really working more than 8 hours a day, i just have to be more efficient with my time, and i don’t take my entire lunch break anymore. june/july are the main two months that my job stresses me (and my entire team) out. i have a 15 minute presentation over zoom on wednesday to discuss HR policies to incoming residents. in theory, doing it over zoom should be less intimidating, but i’m still nervous about public speaking. i probably have to do another presentation for the fellows, but i’m not as concerned for that as fellows are much more chilled out. my supervisor announced in our last meeting that even faculty will experience a salary freeze this year. 

normalcy: as nice and restful this quarantine has been, i think i’m ready to return to some type of normalcy (being more social). though, i do really appreciate i can WFH until september lol. these 3 months have been good for me to really build the habits i find important but always found excuses for. i’m tweaking my routine as i go- til now, i’ve been running on the schedule of 4 days on, 1 day off. i’m thinking it may be better to not run as often so i can recover more. because of the heat, i’ve transitioned to running at night instead of before noon. this led me to start doing yoga in the day time, following yoga with adrienne. i forgot how good yoga makes me feel. it’s such a nice way to wake up the body mid work day. since it’s gotten hotter, i’ve also had less issues with sleeping. my body’s just more exhausted from the heat.

running: after resting two whole days from running, i was able to run almost completely at 6mph+ for the entire 30 min today. this would translate to being at around 10 min per mile (or faster). sadly, my apple watch wasn’t accurate in tracking this and made it appeared that i ran slower than i did. damnit, now i have the opposite problem of accuracy. that’s bullshit lol. i might have to start running outdoors again, but don’t prefer to because i don’t want to run with a mask on/be around people. we’ll see though. 

relationship: i’m starting to feel really needy in my relationship. in the beginning of quarantine until like two months in, i was like “meh, don’t really need to see you. i’m good and enjoying myself in quarantine”, but now at three months, it’s like “i want youuuu”. this could be that because i haven’t had much social interaction at all these three months, and i’m seeking more companionship from the person who is ‘easily’ available and who i love the most. but i do remember with all our last LDR stretches, it starts to get really hard without seeing each other at about the 2 month mark, where we’re almost at now. and we don’t have concrete plans of seeing each other again yet. so as of now, there is no countdown. hopefully i’ll know soon once he has his schedule for his next academic year. 

priorities: today was my first time dining in at a restaurant since quarantine happened - paper pot. this was also the last restaurant i ate at before restaurants shut down. i thought the experience would be more ‘novel’? but it was ordinary. even though i didn’t dine out for 3 months, it felt like i was just there a few weeks ago. the food was pretty bomb though. having the experience of now staying mostly at home for 3 months, helps me place my priorities in check. like, did i NEED to be spending all the time/money/energy i did in the past on eating out? i may have been better sitting my ass at home and working on myself/saving money LOL.