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cannibal-witchh · 3 years

Text

Reader(Fem) X Alcina Dimitrescu

(PART 1)

Written by cannibal_witchh

⛓Trigger Warning⛓

Story contains: Gore, sexual elements, vulgar language, violence, elements of sub/dom behavior, and captivity.

Notes:

I am not the most confident writer so bare with me if theres some flaws floating around the story. I also have very minimal general knowledge to Alcina right now due just demos only being out. Please, be considerate that there's only so much information released on her so most of what I'm writing is not canon. Let's keep it positive and real, we all are thirsting after Lady D so here's a a fanfiction. Also couldn't condense it in one story so going to make this adleast a two or three parter.

It can get confusing with a lot of female characters so the reader is of course:

Y/N - your name

Her/she- i wanted to refer to the female reader in italics and bold

Y/L/N- your last name

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Thunder echoed along the well decorated corridor walls . Hints of lightning occasionally flashed between fluttering curtains. Beyond the curtains was an open window, below that was a critical drop into snow and shards of large rocks. That was definitely not worth risking. Y/N had been held in captivity for what felt like a legitimate eternity. Confinded to a small well kempt room, it seemed as though it had once been a guest room according to the furnishing. All the basic necessities of a bedroom were present here. The fabrics that dressed the bed were of a fine quality, and the boards that held all of it up were of incredible carpentry. Gentle embers flickered from the candlewicks that rose tall on the golden girandoles. Despite captivity the room was comfortable, it was illuminated with warm colors, although still dim and feint.

The door swung open, a black swarm of insects swirled infront of the door as it begun to quickly form a figure. It revealed a small vampiric woman, hooded with golden locks peaking from under it. She flashed her teeth with an enthusiastic smile, as she revealed blood stained teeth, lips, as well as her chin. " Oh, goody! You are awake. I always feel bad feeding when someone is asleep.", She shut the door as she advanced closer to Y/N. Adrenaline began to flood through her veins, hair on her body standing up, and her palms perspiring. She was covered in scabbed bite marks, and bruises - it didn't take long for her to recall the abrupt painful puncture of teeth break through her skin. The old bites began to twitch with pain at the idea a new addition would be welcomed. " I just prefer blood thats been in shock, y'know, awake? It gives it a nice acidic flavor, plus,", she towered over Y/N breathing in her aroma. " It smells wonderful.", she giggled in soft whispers. "Enough.", Y/N demanded as she attempted to cease her trembling. Her body was returning to anxiety because it was clear what was about to happen. A feeding. The vampire didn't seem to express offense, strangely her face bore amusement. "Oh ok, how about this!", she excitedly brought out her sickle and swung at her. With one swift swing the sickle hooked right under her knee cap. A shriek was released from Y/N's lips, agonizing pain radiating everywhere, and blood began to river out from the site. The vampire dragged her with the sickle through the corridor as everything seemed like a blurr from the shock. Hallways seemed like a stretched out haze, and noises seemed to be loud echoes one would hear in a juvenile cafeteria. "Whe-where are you taking me...?", she barely mustered as she felt the sickle dig through muscle and actually brush against the back of her knee cap. Fuck. The sickle was released quickly from her skin as she heard the sound of blood fly onto the ground. That abrupt removal felt worse for minutes compared to the weapon actually being present in Y/N's knee. The monstrous woman lifted the sickle to her crimson stained lips, inhaling the aroma deep, and then proceeding to lick the sickle of the blood it had collected. Sounds of ecstasy escaped her satin black lips, her eyes darted over at Y/N as she felt like she was on the verge of fainting from shock. " I love blood that has some acidicity to it. It gives it a nice kick. You know how that works? For example, your blood could still have more of that taste. One who is in a flight or fright scenario, where they are in absolute fear and adrenaline kicks in...thats when the meat and blood have a sour flavor. Mmm, thats why we are going to play a game." , she licked her lips as her eyes flickered with hunger and passion. Y/N groaned in pain as she felt her body gasp from the fevered pain beating in her knee. " I propose we play hide and go seek! You already know who's hiding. I will give you to the count of 100." , her eyes shimmered from this fucked up idea, she quickly turned her back and covered her eyes. Slowly the sickle in her hand vanished within dark smoke, damn it, Y/N within fading in and out had thought perhaps of stealing that and killing her there. Not anymore. She rose up with wobbling knees, just like a new born dear barely capable of using its legs, she began to hobble as fast as she could away.

"Oh, and I can smell your blood. So hide well, Y/L/N."

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Y/N consistently looked back, watching if the vampire had cheated the game. She was indeed honoring the game, that was adleast something about this blonde one she liked. She seemed to honor things she said, " 89...70...", her voice echoed loudly through the halls. The numbers lowering as Y/N felt her adrenaline spike even higher.

Y/N managed to find a door unlocked in a different wing of the manor. She adleast went through 10 locked doors before fleeing to another location of the manor. With pure luck, she discovered this door, it was unlocked and she took her gamble and entered quietly. With trembling gore soiled hands, she locked the door, and sunk to the ground. Very little energy existed in her, she anticipated for dear life the blonde vampire wouldn't smell her here.

The sound of gentle humming danced along the walls of this room, very melodic, sad, and eerie. Lonely, perhaps. With Y/N's quick realization, this resembled a garden bath house. The windows stretched tall in this room, revealing bleeding light from the full moon, there were plants of vibrant emeralds surrounding the large mass of water that centered the room. The water was decorated with rose petals and red spider lilies. The room was architecturally structured with several stones of marble, and looked almost like a Greek bath house . Gentle sounds of rushing water followed between stones which flowed into the big pool of water. Little ripples scattered across the water causing the red flowers to bob up and down.

The humming persisted as Y/N felt her heart drop, she quickly scurried to the nearest marble pillar to conceal herself. The humming was growing louder and louder, could it be the hungry vampire? She wasn't certain if it was worse but it certainly felt like it, Lady Dimitrescu emerged from the shadows of the room, and strided to the water. She was only wrapped in the finest silk, a tight sheer white robe that hugged tightly against her hips. She definitely had a full figure, the robe delivered a silhouette of her motherly figure. It certainly complimented, the low cut of the robe teased her deep cleavage, the sheer silk revealed faint color and the shape of her puffy areolas. Even in the predicament Y/N was in, it was still hard not to appreciate Alcina's physical beauty.

Alcina continued her melodic hum for a few more moments as she admired the undulations of the floral water. " Y/N Y/L/N, you believe me to be foolish?", she broke from her tune as her eyes looked directly at Y/N. She gulped hard as she submitted to the acceptance Alcina would more than likely kill her. She continued to lay her back against the cold pillar, one hand applying pressure to her bleeding knee, the other containing the fear that was trying to escape her lips. " I could smell that delicious blood from here.", she chucked lightly, "Come here, now.", she demanded with her arms crossing. Y/N did not obey the command, she remained quiet behind the pillar. For minutes it consisted of painful sharp silence, only the sound of her terrified heart beats could be heard. Her ears burned and rung, it desperately needed the assurance Alcina was still idle. Did Y/N dare look beyond the pillar? She peeked over and Alcina was no where to be found. Consternation filled her as there wasn't even a trace of evidence to signify the direction Alcina went. Unexpectedly, Y/N felt a hard blow and collapsed on her side. Her hands releasing themselves, and a gasp of air evacuated her mouth. " Oh, I see. ", Alcina had kicked her, her foot pressed hard against her side. Her smooth leg exposed, tracing all the way to her innermost thigh. Her skin looked smooth like porcelain, but certainly felt the weight of heavy boulders as it rested on her. Y/N groaned in pain as she felt her foot dig deep into her. "Bleeding out on my perfect floors. Oh, what a mess. Although, it does certainly smells of of tart berries, yes, what a wonderful aroma.", Alcina breathed in the cold air, inhaling hints of Y/N's blood. She moaned in intoxication to the alluring smell of fresh blood. Alcina removed her foot from Y/N, she gasped for air in relief, and tried to attempt to sit up. Alcina quickly lunged forward without even a blink, and her long hand wrapped around Y/N's throat. "No, I don't think so.", Alcina smirked as her hand squeezed around her throat. She fell onto her back, the large vampress towering over, her large hand pressing into her throat.She was capable of breathing but it was incredibly taxing especially with the critical condition she was in. Desperate wheezing filled the air, it burned and stung inside of Y/N's throat. Alcina stared into her eyes, a long red smile stretched upon her pale white face. "Hmm, this is quite boring already. I am quite famished too.", she released her grip, ascended and brought her arms to her bosom to cross them. Y/N began to violently cough and gag as proper air flow returned to her lungs. After several minutes of constant heaving, she finally managed to collect herself. "Come.", Alcina ordered as she turned on the balls of her feet and waltzed to the bath. Y/N submitted, too exhausted to resist any longer. She barely could stand but managed, she approached Alcina with her eyes fixed on her every move. " My little one lacks control. Just as I would suspect with her age. If she doesn't stop stabbing you, you'll die. And I really have grown addicted to your flavor as well. I really would hate for you to bleed out one day because of her reckless actions.", she expressed with a sigh of annoyance. Suddenly, a knock interrupted her rambling, " Lady Dimitrescu,", it was the blonde vampire. Alcina let out another sigh in annoyance. "Yes?", she responded with a disinterested tone, as she crossed her arms a little more snug. Revealing a distracting amount of cleavage being pressed together. " Is Y/N in there?", she sniffed loudly as she strived to rattle the door knob open. " Yes, but I require her. I will discuss with you later some important matters. For the mean time, please do not disturb me and I'll return to you soon.", Alcina said sternly as her fingers drummed the top of her arms impatiently. "Yes, Lady Dimitrescu. ", the blonde vampire responded with pure disappointment in her tone.

"Now, where were we? Oh, yes. I've decided you will become my little feeding pet. My daughters do not know how to handle food without killing it. So you are now only mine. Clear?", she lowered herself and grabbed Y/N by the face. Turning her face side to side to examine the condition she was in. Y/N nodded to the best of her abilities, and quickly, Alcina released her. "Good. I'm glad you are willing. I want you to undress now." Embarassment flooded Y/N's mind, her cheeks buzzing with warmth. Why would she even demand that? " I intend on drinking the blood thats already spilling out of you. But I won't drink it while its been dragged around by a rusty sickle and pressed against the dirty floor.", her refined side was definitely exposed. She was different from her daughters, she wanted her meals much more virtuous. " Oh, now, now. I will even join you. They say when two are bathing they are equals.", she added as she disrobed herself. Gently she slide the robe off her shoulders and down her large breasts, as the robe began to flutter down to the marble. Her naked body exposed, and remarkable. Her large breasts sitting perky, her puffy areolas a light grey, and her waist down was incredibly curvy. Absolutely, a full figured silhouette. She dipped her feet in and followed by submerging her body into the bathwater. She let out a sound of relaxation as she smirked and beckoned Y/N. "Come, now."

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To be continued...

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silver-wield · 4 years

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Hey so I was wondering if you did/could do an analysis on clouds various panic attacks ptsd episodes and how he responds to each one I’m interested to read your thoughts on each one since you usually bring a new perspective to the table for me so thanks for that!

All of Cloud's ptsd attacks? Damn, that's a lot of searching I've got to do. I might not find them all. I'll do my best but you'll have to let me off if I miss a couple lol

Ok, spoiler warning for ppl who haven’t played – do I still need to do this? Eh ok, (I tag FF7R spoilers as final fantasy 7 remake spoilers) and it’s gonna be long.

Also, this is one person’s interpretation of the scene, so if you disagree that’s cool and we’ll agree to disagree.

You’re also gonna have to excuse the janky quality on some of the screens, I’m grabbing them from Youtube and it’s frustrating af trying to get the exact moment I want.

Please check my master post to see if I've already covered your question, thanx

Recap time!

I explain Cloud's entire backstory which covers his PTSD and other issues here, so that should do for a recap right?

A further thing to note is that PTSD affects people differently and in Cloud's case it manifests as a psychological taunt in the form of Sephiroth. Embodiying his sense of failure, lack of self-esteem and self-actualisation, this version of Sephiroth is the one that Cloud reacts to the most strongly. This is the one that makes him whimper with fear and react on instinct instead of observing the situation and attacking. This is the one he fears, and it's a part of himself wearing a monster's face. Why Sephiroth? Who else has done him more harm? Sephiroth killed his mother, Tifa (so he assumes), burned his hometown to the ground and was indirectly responsible for his best friend's death, too.

And Cloud couldn't do a thing about it. He is the manifestation of everything that Cloud hates and fears about himself. Because of this, he's dissociated from much of his feelings. He still feels, but at a lesser degree than he should were he fully in touch with his real self.

Moseying on.

The first PTSD induced attack isn't actually prompted by Sephiroth himself, although he does feature in it. Cloud's first attack happens when he sees the destruction of sector 8 and buildings burning. This gives him the association of the last time he saw a burning building, which happened when his village burned. The sensory input of sights, sounds and smells prompted the memory, which combined with the high stress situation and Cloud's own latent anxiety and guilt for his part in this chaos.

You see a close up of Cloud's eye as it widens and real!Cloud's memory pushes to the forefront of his mind – remember, these memories are things SOLDIER!Cloud can't access at will, which is why they cause him pain when it happens.

Theres a static noise in the background, which is meant to convey a type of ringing in Cloud's ears and then the building's facade morphs to that of his house with the fence around it.

While much of what Sephiroth says is in line with this being a separate being from Cloud and not merely his own subconscious taunting him, there are elements of it being a combination of both. This is in line with the OG where Sephiroth was able to get in Cloud's head and make him doubt his own sense of self. With what we know of how Jenova's cells manipulate Cloud, it's believable that Sephiroth is both a separate being manipulating Cloud to his own ends and partly an aspect of Cloud's psyche that exists to push blame on him for everything. It's the representation of his mental illness that he struggles to fight.

Obviously, there's no fire, so Cloud sweating and breathless is because they're physical symptoms of his PTSD induced trauma.

Sephiroth's taunting lines about how he killed Cloud's mother are overkill when you consider the real Sephiroth's personality. The combination of the overarching Sephiroth and Cloud's PTSD version make a powerful foe that he never really beats. This is a metaphor for the fact those with mental illness are never really free. It's a lifetime battle and even if they're in recovery, that demon is just waiting for one weak moment when they can get them back in their grip.

You can hear Cloud gasp in this scene as once again Sephiroth appears to taunt him. He's not fully recovered from the last attack and now there's another right on top of it. Sephiroth appearing is once again partly Cloud's own trauma and partly the Jenova cells in him warping his perception and allowing Sephiroth to mess with him.

Unlike the time before, this Sephiroth vision is a simple taunt that Cloud is too weak to save anyone. This is his guilt and self-loathing talking about how he couldn't save his mom, Tifa or his town. It could also be hinting that he couldn't save Zack either.

The hidden implication of this scene is the fact that Sephiroth puts his hand on Aerith's shoulder. This is the only time Sephiroth touches anyone besides Cloud.

The next time Cloud has an attack is during the reactor 5 mission. This happens because of Tifa's presence drawing out the painful memory of the Nibelheim reactor where he believed she died after facing down Sephiroth.

Even in the midst of his PTSD attack he looks to Tifa. She doesn't know what's happening with him and he backs away from taking a chance to confide in her, but even during this moment when he's showing weakness he has very good eye contact with her. He's looking her directly in the eye, which he wouldn't do if he wasn't comfortable with her. This shows that Cloud sees her as a source of comfort and support.

You can see the lingering doubt on his face here after he dismisses the attack. He's not aware of what the memory means because he's not in touch with the full story – that belongs to real!Cloud kept hidden away. He knows it's left him unsettled and feeling like a failure. This is one of the few times I've seen that Cloud doesn't dismiss out of hand the content of the attacks.

Tifa repeats a phrase she said back then and Cloud's sense of failure surfaces, causing him pain and to freeze up. We get a voice over from real!Cloud referring to the time he believes he let Tifa down. Before the SOLDIER persona can get too deep into it or question what he means, Barret yells for him to focus. Cloud shakes off the paralysing feelings, but that doesn't stop Tifa asking it he's ok, which he dismisses again. This is typical of truama survivors pushing their feelings down and attempting to function without ever truly dealing with the source of their pain.

This next flash is prompted by the events during chapter 8 where the children get into trouble and Cloud has to rescue them. It echoes a similar even in his past where Tifa climbed Mt Nibel and fell, despite his best efforts to save her. She spent a week in a coma and Cloud was blamed for the incident and told to stay away from her.

The past emotions of guilt and failure mingle with the present situation to prompt a flash of pain as the memory of Tifa surfaces. It's his feelings of guilt and having failed her that cause the pain, not Tifa herself because when he says to Aerith he doesn't know how to explain he turns to the spot where he saw the vision of Tifa and smiles wistfully. This means Tifa herself doesn't cause him pain. The feelings he has about himself, do.

Chapter 13 and omg I love this freak out! I'm sorry, but this is such a great moment for Cloud and really highlights how low he is at this point. This shows the depth that we miss from him always having his SOLDIER persona taking charge. He's just lived through a tragedy. He's seen the girl he likes in pieces and trying to hold it together. He wants to comfort her. He wants to be himself, but he can't because he's just not good enough. He's feeling like a failure in more ways than one. He lost people too, goddamnit!

Then, in a misguided attempt to distract Tifa from her pain, he stumbles right into a trigger point for his own trauma. Of course he wouldn't know this. It's one of those flashes of Sephiroth ranting about his role and Jenova and shit. (I might have mistakenly said this was a future-flash somewhere, but then I remembered he does this rant right before he kills everyone in Nibelheim).

There's very little blocking to the memory. This is pretty well sealed by real!Cloud compared to his other memories. Even painful ones of Tifa have more context than this. This is something that is so damaging to Cloud's psyche that he can't even fill in the space around it.

So, we get the same kind of staticky noise we heard in chapter 2 when the vision of Sephiroth showed. Cloud gasps pretty loud here tbf. He's unguarded because of the vision and possibly his own distraction about what he's just been through. He wasn't prepared to see Sephiroth here even more than he was back in chapter 2 when he had a full on panic attack.

I mean, his pupils are seriously dilated here. Boi is scared.

Cloud's whimpering and my heart breaks for him. Sephiroth is hitting all his weakest points by bringing up failure and mentioning it's not the first time that's happened. Cloud's at a low point already, so it's not unexpected he backs away from this rather than tries to fight. This isn't SOLDIER!Cloud. This is real!Cloud. The fear has driven real!Cloud to the surface and he wants to run away, just like Sephiroth taunted back in chapter 2.

“Through suffering you will grow strong. Isn't that what you want?”

Clearly not by the look on Cloud's face. The part of him that's real!Cloud within this moment looks like he wants to scream that he's had enough of being in pain. He wants to shake his head and deny that he deserves it. What did he ever do wrong?

I feel like this is more of Cloud's own subconscious taunting him and implying that he deserves everything bad that happens to him, rather than it being the external Sephiroth manipulating Jenova's cells. He's saying Cloud secretly wants to suffer because that's all he should ever get in life. He thinks if he suffers enough pain that he'll be stronger for it, instead of the broken person that he really is. This is the type of thing people who’ve lived through trauma deal with every single day. It’s a never ending barrage of not feeling good enough and worrying that your entire existence is a bother to society. Not even just those close to you, you are a blight on the world. That Cloud’s internal trauma is so deeply rooted in this figure of Sephiroth narrows his focus and makes him project all of his fears onto him. It’s no wonder he freezes.

Now, not strictly a PTSD glitch, but it does provoke a very strong reaction from Cloud, and definitely plays into his fears, so I'm gonna include this one on the proviso it's more fear motivated.

This is the moment he sees Tifa stabbed during the VR cut scene. Sephiroth hijacked it to show them meteor, but then he also killed Tifa and then Barret. We know later on that Barret actually dies, so having seen this, Cloud may well relate back to this deep seated fear that he can't save Tifa and she'll die because of him and it'll cause further attacks. This is also a callback to the time in the reactor in Nibelheim when Tifa was stabbed by Sephiroth and Cloud couldn't save her – this ties to the PTSD flashback he had during the reactor 5 mission where he saw Tifa picking up Sephiroth's sword, so it's got precedence to cause him further trauma once he connects the dots. The fact it provokes such a strong emotional response from him – so much so that his entire face changes – I suspect that real!Cloud came out to motivate him to run to her out of the fear he'd just seen her die in front of him – again. The shock and disbelief on his face, the utter heartbreak. His expression changes from SOLDIER!Cloud to real!Cloud in less than 3 seconds. I checked. As a trigger for his trauma, Cloud's fear of losing Tifa pushes him to a lot of things he wouldn't normally do.

This is more of a memory glitch than PTSD since it's tied to the grunt recognising Cloud and calling him out on the false memories he has of being a SOLDIER. He says they went through training together and Cloud's eyes narrow as though he's trying to reconcile a truth against a lie. The truth that real!Cloud was a grunt and SOLDIER!Cloud is a fake.

There's some distress on his face here that links back to the point during the airbuster battle when he first learned about cell degradation. He knows what he believes is true isn't quite right, but he can't figure out why. SOLDIER!Cloud is unaware of the SOLDIER persona he constructed to protect his real self from further trauma. In OG when Cloud finds out – through Sephiroth’s skewed af bullshit – it causes a complete mental break, so real!Cloud's right to be wary of triggering himself because he's not in a good enough place to deal with what he's done to protect himself. He'd blame himself for being even more weak than he thought.

This is more interesting. Usually whenever anyone questions Cloud about his false identity he claims it, while also rejecting it by saying “ex-SOLDIER”, but in Hojo's case, he seems to hesitate, as though part of him knew it would be questioned and wouldn't hold up. Since Hojo's the one who did this to Cloud, it's likely the truth of what happened couldn't be kept back by the SOLDIER lies.

Pained again, Cloud turns his head away, as though he can shut out the truth. Hojo's image glitches for him and it's reminiscent of the OG moment where Cloud confronts Hojo and asks if he can be a proper experiment instead of a failed one (or something like that. I haven't played OG in like 5 years)

The trauma from what Hojo's done is quickly brushed under the carpet thanks to the arrival of the whispers. This is the second time they appear to prevent Cloud learning too much about his past too early. (Dammit, I forgot about deep ground, I'll circle back to it or I'll lose the order for my screenshots)

I'm not including the long corridor walk prompted by Jenova because that's a loading screen and also it happens not because of anything that Cloud experienced in the location, but because the outside influence of Jenova called to him. His only association with Jenova is the infusion of cells, though how he got them does set off attacks. Actually, here's a good point for the deep ground screen.

Preview of zombie Cloud for Mideel anyone? I mean, what can I say? He's totally checked out and it's scary. No wonder he doesn't wanna remember any of it if this is what he was like at the time. Imagine being so doped up with mako that you're not even you any longer? Having experiments carried out on you and god knows what else. Being stuffed in a chamber jammed full of alien dna and left to see what happens.

This is what broke him. I'd say it's similar to the faceless Squall cut scene from the end of FF8. It's chilling. No wonder he crafted an entire persona to protect himself from remembering this.

So this is the culmination of all the other attacks he's had. We get flashback elements from several that threaten to overwhelm Cloud. He's clutching his head. He's in serious pain and can't do anything. He manages to push through and ask if it's really Sephiroth. He then grabs his left arm when it begins to hurt. This is because Sephiroth is left handed. This is also the same arm that had the major infection of geostigma in AC.

Conclusion

Cloud is a messed by puppy and I ship him with therapy.

PTSD is a tricky thing to accurately show, especially in this case when it's not all totally mental illness and there are outside factors that skew how it's portrayed. Part of Sephiroth is within Cloud, though I do suspect it's more of an aspect of his own feelings of self-loating and doubt than it is actually Sephiroth. That's not to say there isn't also a genuine part of Sephiroth within these visions influencing Cloud to do what he wants, but I think it comes down to the context of the moment.

Cloud's been through a lot of shit and fronts like nothing else. He's managed to get away without any kind of vices or coping mechanisms besides this alternate persona that actually does ok in following the real!Cloud's lead when his deeper urges motivate SOLDIER!Cloud into doing things. I mean there's a point where there's a clear debate between the two about dancing for Andrea. All that back and forth eye movement and then the grimace and “fine, for Tifa” expression wasn't necessary if it was just SOLDIER!Cloud.

It's gonna be hard for Cloud to hear that he's not real in the sense that he thinks he is. It's gonna break him. We've got a preview of his scary vacant Mideel look and it's terrifying. Major props to Tifa for refusing to give up on him.

#final fantasy 7 remake spoilers #final fantasy 7 remake analysis #Character analysis #Cloud Strife #Tw: ptsd

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survivormetaverse · 3 years

Text

Episode 13 - "I'm on the side with the biggest threats to win this game" ~Josh

This last round went well!! We got Jay out (rip Corn Tribe💔 tho fr fr it died shortly after merge probs) and I'm still in the game :D We love to see an actual numbers majority now bless 🙏🏽 I hope I go soon 😅 Ingary my beloved is suffering a bit (ty/sorry Dyl 💖) I can't see that happening though bc Colin seems to find me and Amy as his best allies and would use his idol on us so RIP me tbh, typical that the game I'd like to lose earlyish in is the one I go to FTC 😂 tho if I went with Amy and Colin I do think one of them would win (with the double agenting and chaos idle-ing and they're both p social), I'm just good at taking the information we have and planning to ensure we have the best possible outcomes at tribal (which is SO much easier now that we have a numbers majority My Gosh!!!). I love sudoku puzzles but the thing is I'm used to playing on apps or online where it's easier to play kinda methodically, also the height of my sudoku phase was like, last year where I could complete an easy one avg. 10 minutes best time 7 minutes, these two with my 10% DA took 50 minutes, so take off 10% and it's 45 minutes, divide by two and it took me 22.5 minutes per puzzle. Yeah no I don't think I'm gonna win 😂😂 oh well, thanks Raf for letting me do them tonight though, you probably wanted to get to bed but tomorrow I have work and then my driver's license exam (!!!) and then movie night so I really don't have time to 😅😅 but hey! I dont have a second part to that✨ Time isn't real so wish me luck on my driving test now retroactively so that the positive vibes flowing backward through chronos (aka "linear" time) will ensure that when you read this I will already have my license❤️. xoxo, gossip girl

honestly having more numbers done for you in a sudoku puzzle is just making me more confused

math challenges during pride month is pure homophobia

Congrats to jared for guaranteeing himself f5 for winning today 😭 and here I thought I did well with 40 minutes. I don't think he would play his idol on jodi but I don't know with this invisible round. Apparently Jodi is telling people I have the idol from phantom aka the one colin has, which is a problem if they are trying to flush it. I guess I'm a threat even though probably only dennis in the jury isn'taf at me lol. Colin has an idea to get votes on him then idol and us two vote Josh out but I really think they are going to be voting me based on how quiet it is and how many other alliances there are lol. There's the three with Josh and Jared and Colin because Josh doesn't want me at the end. See I knew he didn't like me lol. So I'm here trying to think of I need to play something or give it away and be voted out lol or just keep it and be out. My thought was to use the steal a vote so then no one would know it was me who had it but I kind of think I might need that next round of say jodi wins then jared idols. At f5 it could be me colin and jared all idoling if none of us make a move lol. Anyway I think I'm on shaky ground this go and idk why haha I'm there are much bigger threats that a no social person who flipped and wasn't even bonded with the jury lol. Here's hoping colin elle and I stay strong. And I can get second to colin. That would be fun lol but lots of game left. And I'm still at disney. This is going to be a stressful day.

I hate invisible rounds. too much is going on. and literally no one is online to talk it out personally, i want Josh out this round. I think if I wait until final 4 to cut him, he'd be bitter at me in particular. Plus, he's not in my endgame plans. I want to have an easy win, and that means putting Elle and Jared next to me in ftc. the most obvious thing to do is split between Jodi and Anastasia, and I think that's happening because it's simple and no one else is around to dispute it. Amy is still my closest ally and I can trust her, so I told her that I want to take out Josh. i don't think the two are close so it was easy to get her on board. There's an option of me ENSURING he goes by playing my idol for whoever Jared and Jodi is voting for, but I don't want to do that. so my plan is to also have Jodi vote Josh with us, so it's 3-3-1. Either Jared idols Jodi and Josh leaves, or it's a revote and Josh still leaves god I'm just so worried and nervous. If I were to get blindsided, this is the round to do it. but I don't see anyone stepping up to actually pull the trigger, except maybe Jodi. I wanna make it to the end so badly. i've been playing orgs for too damn long, I need a win. please please please let me survive this round

So I'm coming to the realization that at least 2 people on my side have idols and theres still a hidden steal a vote that Elle might have. So I'm on the side with the biggest threats to win this game so it's time to make a move. Jared said that he'll be willing to play his idol to save Jodi so that means that it's time to flush these idols out of the game. The plan is for 2 of us to vote for Colin and the other to vote either Elle or Amy. My original alliance is splitting vote between Jodi and Anastasia with me, Elle and Anastasia voting Jodi and Colin and Amy voting for Anastasia as our contingency plan. However, Jodi warned me that Colin was saying my name to her this morning so he might try to pull some snake shit. But im hopeful that Jared plays the idol for Jodi and somehow Colin doesn't play his so it'll be a tie between him and Anastasia.

So I have immunity and I have been a little inactive but its ok because Jodi has kept me up with whats going on. Jodi tells me that they are splitting the vote on me. Which is good because I am safe lol. Anyways but I talked to Colin and Amy and I wonder if they really do trust me now. I did vote with them twice. So I told them that I was scared that I was getting voted and they said they wouldnt vote me. So sweet. I also talked to Josh and all of them are saying Jodi to vote. But Jodi is getting an idol played on her Im pretty sure so unless one of them suspects that we are lying about Jared winning immunity, one of them is going home this round.

https://youtu.be/ebfzvSaWULY

Dear Colin: We do not want to vote you out. We simply want to flush your idol. I seriously hope you are still here after tonight. You know what? This round has been insane. I'm obviously on the bottom, ready to get voted out. I wanted immunity so bad. But instead of crying, I created a beautiful plan that I hope comes to fruition. Anastasia won immunity. My game move this round is multilayered. First step is to create immunity for 3 people: me, Anastasia, Jared. We told everybody that Jared had won immunity, and that he may or may not idol for me. This is perfect because if they vote for me, they'll have their votes negated, same with splitting them on Anastasia. They'll completely avoid voting for Jared to avoid their vote not being counted. Next step: flush idols. Josh approached me last night and he wanted to work with me and Jared to flush out idols from Elle, Amy, Colin. Originally before he even came to me, I had wanted to do a 2-2 on Amy and Colin and tell him it's between Elle and Amy, but he actually said that he wants to do a 1-1-1 on those 3 to guarantee either idols being flushed or we get our pick of who goes. Josh doesn't know that Anastasia is with us too, but it's sorted. Colin wants to vote out Josh here, but everybody wants to vote out me. He came to me and Jared to vote Josh, and hope that they (Colin, Amy, Josh, Elle, Anastasia) split the vote on me and Anastasia. However, since the split was (Elle, Josh, Anastasia) vote me, and (Colin, Amy) vote Anastasia, the vote split no longer works since Colin is voting for Josh and Amy wants to vote me. Essentially, it's a 4-3 Me to Josh in Colin's eyes, and he wants to get a vote thrown so that it could at least tie 3-3. Me, Jared, Anastasia have decided before even Colin and Josh approached us that we wanted to do a 2-1 on Colin and Amy or something, so the fact that Josh approached us is perfect. How are we countering advantages? 1. Idols Jared has one idol, and there's only 2 idols between Elle, Amy and Colin. By throwing votes on all 3, we either guarantee somebody flushes an idol, or we guarantee somebody gets idoled out 2. Floating advantage from hunt 5 From the wording, it's either an idol nullfier or steal a vote. I'm voting for Elle here just in case it's a steal a vote, so that at least Amy is still open for a revote in case Colin idols. (I'm hedging my bets that Elle has it not Amy) 3. Idol Nullifier In this case, I go if Colin idols, and I will just…not forgive Faffy for putting both a chaos idol and an idol nullifier in a game and those be the two ways I go. Let's just hope this isn't what hunt 5 is. The final plan should yield 2 votes Colin, 2 votes Jodi, 1 vote Josh, 1 vote Elle, 1 vote Amy. In a revote, we save Me > Josh > Elle > Amy > Colin. This vote is for the win. This will be my game winning move. Creating immunity for 3 people, flushing idols, picking who goes. Let's. Freaking Go.

So idr what I said before but Anastasia suggested to Amy that we needed to split votes and wanted to split some on me LOL so now we're putting 3 on her, possibly 4 if Josh comes online in the next 9 minutes✨ Never a smart plan for the latest addition to suggest voting off older allies, but oh well. One day we'll work together well, Anastasia 💖 one day 😂 But anyway! I really hope Colin and Amy make it to FTC, rooting for them🥳

~~~

Edgic:

Power Rankings:

Jodi: Masterful plays and manipulations this round. Is getting her way. Best round of the game for her by far. The most impressive thing by far was giving three people immunity by a little lying.

Josh: The person who ratted out his side first. Made a huge move that might just save him. Taking out Colin here is perfect for him as it would give him a lot to say at FTC. He’s playing 3D chess while everyone else is playing checkers and Jodi is playing 6D chess. I think he will make it very far in this game even if people don’t necessarily want him at FTC.

Jared: Has the potential to do more. Just doing what Jodi tells him to do.

Anastasia: Playing the middle like a smooth criminal. She is letting others do her dirty work for her. She is using her ally in Jodi to have those connections outside her alliance. However, she is in danger of being seen as expendable very soon.

Colin: Is getting blindsided tonight. Power has gone to his head and has made him unable to perceive who is actually with him. Assumes people will just magically work with him. Too concerned with keeping his idol. He has become, in essence, the new Jodi.

Amy: Colin’s lackey. Has no idea what is going on and will probably continue to have no idea.

Elle: Completely out of the loop this round

So Jodi’s plan is currently to do a 2-1-1 between Colin, Amy, and Elle. Jodi, Jared, and Josh will each vote one of them. Then Anastasia will vote Colin. On the other side, Colin plans to vote Josh while Elle is voting Jodi because she’s being kept out of the loop by everyone. And Amy is at Disney World.

2 votes Colin

1 vote Josh

1 vote Elle

1 vote Amy

1 vote Jodi (nullified by Jared’s idol)

1 vote Anastasia (nullified by immunity)

#episode #episodes

0 notes

harryff · 7 years

Text

Chapter 2 Aria Part 1.

Trigger warning: Sexual assault, domestic abuse. Please call the 1−800−799−7233 if you have suffered from any abuse.

In the next upcoming months Aria and Harry reconnected. Her album was to be released soon but she longed to go back to the days she sang background for the band.

Laying in bed she remembered the day Liam and Harry got into a fight over whose part she will sing along with and somehow she managed to appease them both. It was the first time Harry truly noticed her as he tells it to people.

It was currently 10pm in New York which meant it was 3am in Manchester where Harry was working on his album. Aria was supposed to be asleep instead her mind raced filled with anxiety she couldn’t relax instead her thoughts took her to the worst possible outcomes for performance the next day. To help pass time she texted him

Aria: I miss you big head lol😚😙😋

Aria: I can’t sleep😣😣😓😓☹

Aria: I wish I could call you but you’re sleeping beauty and you definitely need 6 hours of sleep at least or youll be evil lol 😴😴😴

Aria: Remember the time i made you stay up for 24 hours and you were grumpy the whole day and I had to make it up 😉😂

Aria: I have to perform tomorrow. I don’t want to. I’d much rather go back to the good old days where no one knew I existed

Aria: I still laugh at the memories of you falling on stage…. clumsy prince

Aria: I’m gonna have diarrhea tomorrow theres no way I’m gonna survive

Aria: Sorry TMI 🙊

Aria: Since I cant bug you you’ll wake up to like 20 texts. 😜

Aria: she sent picture of her sleeping with the teddy bear he got her 2 years ago

Aria: Me and Mr. H miss you

Aria: I had to give him surgery awhile back. Roxy the little shit ripped his eye out. I almost cried 😢😢😢

Aria: Imagine me a grown woman crying over a stuffed animal. 😂😭😭😭

Aria: I went into panic mode!! That was not a contingency I planned for she just bit his eye and yanked it out! Then she starts running with it! In her mouth! Chewing it! I never truly knew what panic was till that moment!😲😲😲

Aria: Damn dog😒😒😒

Aria: Arent you supposed to be up running? It’s 3

Aria: I miss you again

Aria: I don’t want to perform Harry

Aria: Will you be disappointed in me if I quit?

Aria: Will you call when you wake up?

When Harry woke up at 5am his time he read the texts laughing she was definitely panicking her nerves were getting to her because she was a chatter box.

He called her via Skype

Her computer facing her she raised up hearing the call she clicked the mouse before falling back in bed.

“Aria” he said watching her move around

“Yes”

“I see Roxy is around Mr.H” he said noticing the dog by her side

“Yes she was on 1 month probation after she did that”

He chuckled

“It’s not funny” she said sitting up

“Yeh ok?”

“No” she said looking down

“Yeh’ll do good!”

“I don’t like performing in front of people”

“Yeh did when we went on tour”

“Yes but no one knew it was me”

He sighed

“I have to perform for the executives at 9. Practiced my ranges”

“Don’t strain your voice”

“I know… what are you doing today besides calming my nerves”

“Just tha'nd recording”

“You’re working on your 3rd album?”

“Yes”

She smiled “you have great bed head”

He laughed “are yeh not sleepy?”

“I am I keep jerking in my sleep”

“Just relax poppet”

“I’m trying”

“I have to go for my run”

“Ok i’ll call you when I get done”

“Ok” he said blowing a kiss

She caught it.

Harry: How’d it go? He asked when she didn’t call by the end of the day he wondered how things went

Aria: 😭😭😭😭😭😖😓

Harry called her

Harry: Pick up poppet

Aria: No 😭😢

Harry: howd it go

Aria: ‘need more practice’

Aria: Tommy said ‘on a scale of 1-10. 1 being pretty bad and 10 being the worst performance ever that was a 7.’ 😭😭😭 I can’t do this

Harry:😒😒 drop him he’s a shitty manager

Harry: Pick up poppet please

She took a deep breath before answering his call

“Hey” she said

“Where are you?”

“At home” her voice broke

“Aww pet”

“I can’t do this Harry”

“I think yeh need another manager”

She sniffed “I wish you were here”

“I’ll be there soon pet”

She remained silent

“Wanna tell me what happened?”

“My voice shook the whole time….sang off key sounded like shit”

“It’s alright Aria”

“It’s not,” her voice was soft. “I’m not made for this.”

“Aria yeh are” he stressed

She sighed “how was your day”

“It was wonderful recorded 3 songs”

“Good”

“My album is done will you listen to it?”

He paused “i don’ kno’ if i should.” He was hesitant. In the past she depended so much on his opinion he got frustrated with the search of approval from him.

“Ok fair enough i’ll have Mr. H listen to it”

He remained silent

“Maybe i can do like a Sia thing but cover my whole body be in dungeon somewhere”

He was still quiet

“Ok Harry good night.” She said ending the call. She knew him too well he was asleep.

As she sat aimlessly looking at the ceiling she contemplated all the different things she could do to put an end to her contract. Get sick with a virus, purposely damage her larynx, car accident etc. When Harry awoke at 3am his time he called her she stared at the phone contemplating whether she would swipe right or left. The screen went dark she thanked the gods for not making her make that decision.

At 10 in the morning she found herself in the studio listening to Thomas or Tommy berate her

“ARIA! Im talking to you!” he said snapping her out of her thoughts

“Sorry” she cowered away

“WHY” he paused “why didn’t you perform like you did in this video? you were so good then what is it now?” he was showing her a video of her singing at a local jazz bar. There were only 10 people, people she would never meet this was different this was executives and produces people who had the power to build or destroy her career with one move.

“I dont know im just nervous”

“ABOUT WHAT? WE HAVE DONE EVERYTHING UNDER THE SUN TO GET YOU TO NOT BE NERVOUS? SO WHAT ARE YOU NERVOUS ABOUT NOW?

“EVERYTHING!” She argued back before looking at her phone Harry had called her 5 times already.

Harry: Aria are you ok ive called you multiple times

She recorded Tommy

He hit the wall beside her “YO YOU A FUCKING EMBARRASSMENT IT’S A WASTE OF TALENT YOU HAVE. I GOT A 10 YEAR OLD WHO WOULD KILL TO BE IN YOUR SPOT!” He walked away from her “…SO YOURE TELLING ME YOURE GONNA LET SOME 10 YEAR OLD OUT DO YOU? DO WE NEED TO MAKE YOU SING NAKED NEXT TIME?”

She spoke softly “Im sorry I can’t Tommy”

“DONT TOMMY ME! TELL ME YOU CANT! YOU JUST DONT WANT TO! YOU KNOW HOW HARD I HAVE WORKED FOR YOU! YOU OWE ME THIS!”

She sat silently and hit the send button

Harry: get up and walk away. He texted feeling his anger rise if he was there his fist would be connecting with Tommy’s jaw

Aria: I cant

Harry: Aria get up and walk away

Aria: he’s blocking the door.

She remained quiet waiting for the vent session to be over.

“You have a show tomorrow Chicago Bulls so get ready. Ya ass aint making a fool out of me again” She nodded leaving the studio. She ignored Harry for the rest of the day working on her vocals. She sat at home working on her ranges.

“You sound good Ria” her grandmother said cooking

“Thanks Grandma”

“Whats wrong?” she noticed her behavior

“Tommy screamed at me… told me lots of things i was an embarrassment to him… grandma i don’t know if i can do this”

“Youre too good dont let him ruin you!”

“I know”

Her phone lit up it was Harry texting her.

Harry: can you call me please

She stood up and went to her room to call him

“Aria” he said looking at her on the camera

“Hey” she said getting comfortable on the bed. Her eyes were puffy her nose was red. “How was your day?”

“Good.. are yeh ok?”

“I’m ok” she sighed

“Wha’ happened with Tommy”

“Have to perform tomorrow”

He tilted his head in confusion

“Yea”

“Don’ wan yeh to be sad pet”

“I’m ok Harry. Me and Mr. H will be tough” she joked

He chuckled “I’ll be there soon so save some luvin for me yea?” “No you dont get any”

“Wha’? Why?” he smiled

“Well see me and Mr. H have a bond even you can’t break. I have been there with him through thick and thin” her eyes welled up “and he wont” her voice started to break “and he wont let me down and i won’t do the same to him… sorry i dont mean to cry”

“Aria dont cry pet”

She chuckled wiping her tears “I don’t even know why im crying Harry thats the problem. With Mr. H i know i cant let him down"

“You never let me down" he spoke softly

“I have, i know that, but im trying not to.”

He sighed not knowing what to say. She was always too hard on herself. Her worst critic never letting up on her imperfections. “ ‘M gonna go to bed” he mumbled

“K good night” she said before ending the call

The next day she walked onto the court her hands shaking getting ready to sing the national anthem. Tommy had softened his tone but his words were still harsh. She found herself panicking 30 minutes prior, hunched over with a paper bag to her mouth. The cameras flashed she brought the microphone to her mouth. She closed her eyes imagined she was at home. When the song was done people jumped to their feet cheering her on. She thanked them and rushed off court. It was one of her best performances.

“WHOO!“ Tommy cheered “THAT WAS IT! THAT’S WHAT YOU DO!… You sounded so good. Thats what you do in front of the execs don’t worry about them you got this Aria!”

She smiled taking a deep breath in she wanted to leave there was no celebration for her this only meant the inevitable an album release and a music career.

“Thanks Tommy can i go home now?”

“Nah lets go party!” “I really dont want to”

“Look its for your image just one drink” he begged

“Ok” she sighed as they made their way to club she texted Harry

Aria: I think i did ok everyone is happy

Aria: Going to the club with Tommy

Aria: Text you when i get home

It was supposed to be the club but they pulled up to his house, there was a party going on

“Tommy i thought you said club” she said giving him a look

“I know but house parties are fun!”

She shook her head this was her first time in his house “I’m not”

“Please just one drink you promised”

“Fine one drink and i’m done”

An hour passed one drink turned to two and two turned to three she thought. Her head was spinning, Tommy was being too friendly, he was groping her in places he shouldn’t have. When she tried to leave his grip on her wrist tightened when she fought back he put her arm behind her making her face the crowd as he dry humped her from behind. When he dragged her to the bathroom she used the opportunity to escape.

“Come on!” he stressed in a playful tone licking her neck forcing her against the wall

“No stop” she said weak from the concoction she was never a light weight so this was not the norm for her He hit her thigh “I said come on!” his thigh wedged between hers his tone changed he was being forceful

“Stop Tommy” she tried to fight him off

He held her hands above her with one hand while the other groped her body “You know you want this dick, Harry can’t do you like me”

“Please” she begun to cry she was too weak

Abruptly the door swung open. The man looked at Aria’s face “Yooo chill!”

“I’m not doing nothing” he said stepping away from her with his hands up

She quickly maneuvered from him he reached out for her but her arms were too quick on her way out she fell to the floor. Only managing to stand up and rush up the steps she found a room and locked herself in it. Quickly she dialed Harry’s number forgetting he wasn’t in the US, when she remembered she called her grandmother

“Aria do you know what time it is? im asleep!”

“Grandma please come get me” she sobbed on the phone

“Whats wrong?” she sensed the urgency

“He almost raped me i dont know whats wrong with me”

“You stay there i’m calling the cops”

“NO! please”

“Where are you?”

“Tommy’s house on 3rd bellavue house with all the cars”

“Stay where you are I’m coming!”

It felt like eternity waiting for her grandmother. She was finding herself waking up from an unconscious ous state every 5 minutes. She was fighting to stay awake. Her phone rang 4 times before she awoke

“Hello? Hello? Aria!?”

“….Grandma?”

“Where are you? You tell me now or i’m coming in with my shot gun!”

“I’m coming don’t” she said weak

Slowly she stood up her legs felt like jello, she opened the door and walked to the staircase held onto the railing with a death grip the party was dying down. She saw him at the corner of her eye he was mingling slowly she walked down the steps trying her best to not draw any attention to herself. When she got to the bottom of the stairwell. The door seemed so far away there were so many people in the way she tried to quickly move around them

“Aria? Is that you?” she heard his voice

“ARIA! I’m calling you!” fear took over she was pushing people out of the way, when she reached the door she opened it and collapsed her grandmother already standing outside her car ran towards her

“Aria” he spoke in her ear as pulled her up. She winced away

“YOU GET AWAY FROM HER!” her grandmother threatened

“I’m just trying to help her out”

“YOU TOUCH HER I’LL BLOW YOUR WHOLE FACE OFF!”

His temper rose “CALM THE FUCK DOWN OLD BITCH!” “I GOT YOUR BITCH TOUCH HER AGAIN AND YOU WON’T HAVE A DICK” She whimpered standing up

“Aria are you ok?” she spoke to her helping her up

She limped to the car her ankle sprained

When they got to the house it took her grandmother 10 minutes to wake her up

“Oh thank God! Aria what did you drink?”

“I don’t know” she said turning her head away from her

“Let’s get you in the house”

She slumped on the couch her grandmother close by the whole night.

The next morning she woke up with a splitting migraine confused about what happened

She groaned her memory was hazy, she remembered drinking a blue motorcycle and Tommy being aggressive she remembered him walking her to the bathroom his smile on his face his eyes telling her something else

“Oh mi nieta you’re awake!”

Her voice raspy “Grandma what happened?”

“Thomas tried to rape you!”

She thought “No… what?”

“Aria you called me you couldn’t even stand! you need to call the cops i think you were drugged”

“He what?” she sat up needing to piece things together

She picked up her phone there were texts from Tommy

Tommy: i hope you had fun i had too much to drink

Tommy: im sorry about what i did I love you😗 Aria i would never hurt you i was just fucked up Tommy: shit you were too,

Tommy: grinding on me i miss read the signals, you know that right? You know how i get when im fucked up

Tommy: tell your g ma to chill i was fucked up too shit you were too

Tommy: call me when you get this

Miranda: 😁😀YAY bestfriend you did good!

Her mind tried to remember what happened but it couldn’t dnt her wrist was bruised, she rubbed it to sooth the pain.

“Aria you need to call the cops!”

She shook her head “I don’t”

“Well freshen up clear your head”

“How’d i get home?” she looked around

“I came to get you! that rapist was trying to pull you back in”

She stood up and fell to the ground

“Ahh!” She grimaced grabbing her swollen ankle

“I think you sprained it” her grandmother picked up her foot “here put it up let me get some ice”

In the bathroom she undressed she noticed bruises on her neck, her thighs and knees when the skirt fell she covered herself with her hands, she had no underwear, she could not remember what happened to it. In shower she tried the best she could to remember she couldn’t. But she also knew something wasn’t right. she scrubbed hard feeling dirty. She felt a sick feeling from the pit of her stomach she hunched over unable to stop it. She vomited.

In her sleep it came to her in a flash

She saw herself drinking her drink.That nauseous feeling intensified

“I gotta go I don’t feel good.” she steadied herself by holding his shoulders

“No stay” he rubbed her sides

She shook her head “I’m leaving”

“I said stay” he insisted pulling her back, her back to him he breathed on her neck. She moved her neck away “Mmmm you have a nice ass” he said before smacking it

She shot up in cold sweats her head pounding was it true? Did he really do that?

She looked at her phone there were texts from Harry. He sent her a screenshot from the tabloid the caption “Looks like you and Thomas had fun, you did great! I watched it! what a way to celebrate😂😋” the picture her hair on her face with one arm behind it looked like they were in the middle of a dance. Her wrist ached as if it had a memory of the pain that was inflicted upon it. Harry was oblivious to the dark truth. feeling nauseous she jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom. Rising slowly she cried looking at herself in the mirror.She blamed herself she should have known better. She should have been more careful.

Picking up her phone there was another message from Harry

Miranda: Bitch call me you look lit😂😜

Miranda: Umm that picture doesnt look right call me 🙁😕😞

Harry: call me when you wake up pet I miss your voice😗.

She snatched her laptop from the floor quickly she searched flights to Manchester leaving the next day. She was willing to pay any price once she got the confirmation email she hopped off the bed and three clothes into her suitcase

Her grandmother walked into her room “Where you going you can’t leave!”

“Manchester”

“Are you going to tell him

“I can’t even remember what happened! if it happened will he believe me?”

“Aria he can’t get away with what he did! now I don’t know how the music industry works but that man cant walk away from what he did to you!”

“I know mimi”

“So call the cops”

“I..” she looked to the bathroom

Her grandmother stressed her point “tell him.. Harry will know what to do…. have you talked to him?”

She shook her head

“I’m not going to let this go”

“I know”

“How’s your head?”

“Pounding”

“Well relax I will finish packing for you”

The next day she found herself in Chicago O’hare limping around she hadn’t told Harry about her plan to stop by.

Tommy: You haven’t called are you ok

Tommy: just call me or send a text to tell me your ok

She felt sick looking at the texts holding onto Mr.H she walked around till her flight departure time. When she landed at 2pm she made a beeline for his condo.

She knocked in the door she quickly wiped away her tears

“Yea yea!” she heard his voice through the door

He stood confused for a second before his face lit up

“Poppet! Wha’re yeh doing here?“ he asked lifting her into a tight embrace

“I missed you” she confessed

“Yeh should have told me!”

“I just did!” she said forcing a smile

He leaned down to kiss her she could only manage a few kisses it was killing her.

“What do I owe this delightful surprise?” she shrugged walking in

“Hey” she greeted his band

“ARIAAA!”

She smiled

“Yeh should have told me really” he said pulling her down on his lap. “ ‘M flying to London tomorrow family time”

“Oh” she said looking down

“Yeh’ll come with me?”

She nodded

“Wha’ happened to your foot?” Weezer asked

“I fell... heels”

“All that partying yeh ‘nd Thomas did” Harry commented “yeh never texted by the way”

She swallowed hard smiling at him “sorry forgot”

He raised his eyebrow

“So what are you up to today?” she asked

“Last recording session are yeh ok?” he noted her pale complexion

“Yea, just cold”

“Yea we gotta go mate” Stevie said noticing the time

“Oh shit! Yeh want to come?” he said standing up

She shook her head

“Jet lag?”

She nodded

He leaned down placing his forehead on heres “Ok well yeh kno’ where the food is. Don' eat all my bananas. I’ll be back ok?”

She forced a smile fighting the tears “yes”

“Are yeh sure you’re ok?”

She hated that he could read her like an open book

“Yes” she said kissing him

“One more” he said biting his lip

She wrapped her arm around his neck. It took all the energy she had to put passion into the kiss

“Oi! we gotta go.” Stevie said

As the day turned to night she sat crying on the couch. She checked her emails wanting to tell her grandmother she was safe. Her heart dropped seeing Tommy’s name on the list she hesitated to open it. When she did it was a picture of her in the airport the title read Aria party girl rushed to Manchester to see Harry. The caption read Rumor is he called her screaming mad about the picture of her and manager Tommy G. His email: Im fucking calling you and you in UK? We got sessions you better be back by Tuesday. She felt sick to her stomach they couldn’t be more wrong. Sleep finally seeped in after hours of laying awake. Her memory flashed through her dreams

“Come on” he says grabbing her hand he had a goofy smile on his face pulling her towards the dance floor

“No Tommy” she tries to resist

He pulled harder making her collapse into him “damn baby! I didn’t know you wanted it like that?” he chuckled

“Stop” she pushes away from him

His hands grab her ass he is holding her in place as he rubs his nose on her neck “you gonna feel so good on my dick”

She sat up immediately tears flooded out of her eyes this couldn’t be happening she thought. She got off the couch and went to lay in bed. A migraine already thumping through her brain she lay in bed when she heard the door open she turned on her side pretending to be asleep.

Harry quietly took of his clothes and retreated to the bathroom. She could hear him humming behind the water. When he got in bed he cradled behind her kissing her cheek before falling asleep. As she begun to get sleepy she prayed she wouldn’t wake up from a nightmare. In the morning her prayers were answered she softly got out of bed and got ready. Harry woke up an hour later.

“Wha’ do yeh want for breakfast pet?”

“Nothing this is fine”

“ ‘Re yeh sure? you’ve been pushing around the cereal for 5 minutes” she was in a daze she didn’t notice

She shook her head “it’s fine I promise” she lied

He grabbed her hand “Ok are yeh sure? cuz i’ll get yeh anything yeh want”

“I promise” she said forcing the spoon in her mouth.

When they got to his mother’s house she was greeted with love

“Aria come in we have missed yeh oh I always knew yeh two would get back together!” Anne hugged her

She smiled

“Aria!” Gemma greeted her “finally someone we like… no love”

“When are yeh goin to marry her Harry?”Anne asked

“Oh muuum” he fussed

“ ‘M just saying she took yeh back it’s a sign”

Gemma chimed in “Yea no one wants yeh but her so yeh need to be in your knees”

“These’re strangers not my family I don’ kno’ wha’ alien planet they come from” he joked causing them to laugh

Gemma grabbed her hand dragging her away from Harry “We have to catch up that dress at the wedding to die for where did you get it?”

“Michael Castello designed it”

There was a lot of catching up to do which Aria gladly agreed to do anything to take her mind off that night

At dinner she sat once again pushing her food

“Do yeh want something else?” Harry whispered

“No!” she got scared “this is fine!” she put a mouthful in her mouth

He gave a look she was definitely being strange. She had no appetite there was a raging migraine she was trying to calm down. After yawns went around the room after dinner every one retreated to their rooms

“Ok off it pet what’s the problem?” He asked while they lay in bed. He was trying to find out what was wrong with her

She spoke softly “Nothing”

“No there’s something big show comin’ up?”

“No just thinking”

“About?”

She shook her head and smiled

“Yeh don’ wan’ to talk ‘bout it?”

She shook her head

“Ok” he looked down at her holding Mr.H “You’ve been holding him awfully tight can’ yeh hold me like tha’ too?” He joked

“No you might break” she teased

“Wha’?”

“You might break” she held back her smile

“Are yeh saying I’m weak?” He asked towering her

“……..Yes”

“Yeh wanna test tha’ theory?” he asked before kissing her deeply his kisses made her forget momentarily but when he started grabbing her thighs and kissing her neck is when her mind refused to let it go. She froze eyes shut tight. He noticed the tension in her body he raised up to look at her

“Aria wha’s wrong?”

“Nothing”

“You’re stiff as a board look at me” she opened her eyes “wha’s wrong?”

She sighed “I can’t…. not tonight”

He huffed “ok” he gave her sweet kisses

“Sorry”

“Don’ be luv is just sex… I can take care of myself” he said winking

She giggled “Perv”

“Hey only for yeh”

“I guess I should feel special”

At night her prayers were not answered. Her mind took her back to that night

She looks around people are dancing she doesn’t know where she’s going but Tommy is pulling her towards it.The bathroom door is kicked open and he pushes her inside

“Stop it Tommy” she says trying to walk passed him. He closes the door with his foot. He charges towards her stuffing his tongue in her mouth. She pushes him away and slaps him. His hand is immediately around her neck his eyes cold and dark he pushes her against the wall. “bitch ill kill you matter of fact” his other hand loosens his belt

“please” she begs clawing at his arm he pulls out his penis, "you know you want this dick" he jams his knee into her thighs forcing them open. “shut up.” He reaches up her skirt to rip off her underwear. He pulls hard making her body jerk forward before the fabric gives way. "Harry cant do you like me" He gets closer kissing her neck she tries pushing him off he places both arms above her head holding them by the hands he reaches between her thighs she’s crying “please” she begs. He stops and looks at her he licks his hand before he palms her vagina. He moans “you wet already, just how i like it”

She shot up from her sleep in a cold sweat immediately she ran to the toilet a violent vomiting spree was to begin.

Harry groaned “Aria?” he turned to his side to confirm she wasn’t there

“Aria” he called sitting up hearing the vile noise. Slowly he got out of bed and walked towards the bathroom. He knelt down beside her rubbing her back

“Something yeh ate?” he offers explanation

She nods in agreement

When she’s done her hands are shaking she can barely wash her face. She was pale as if she saw a ghost

“Wha’s wrong?” he asked noticing her expression

She turned around with tears in her eyes if he only knew

“Shhh it was just a dream” he sooths her hugging her tight.

But it wasn’t was it? Tommy really did those things. The reality was setting in.

In the morning she continues to rub Harry’s arm unable to fall asleep she lay awake against his chest

During breakfast she checked her phone

Tommy: Where the fuck are you at

Tommy: you think it’s funny you fucking with my career

Aria: I need more time please

Miranda: so you really gonna ignore me your bff?

Mimi(grandmother): Aria have you told him

Aria: Not yet I will soon I promise

As Gemma and Aria shopped around she tried her best to act natural.

“Are yeh ok?” Gemma asked during lunch Aria even though trying her best was very distant

“Yea!” she said putting on a happy face

“Sure? yeh look pale”

She smiled “Yea lack of sun” she joked

“Tell Harry he owes you a vacation”

She smiled Gemma her biggest advocate always made Harry go out of his way for her “Only if you come too!”

“You know it!”

As the day wound down she hopped the night would be gentle on her she couldn’t wake up from another nightmare.

“Did you see this?” Harry laughed showing her a picture of her crawling up the stairs. Who would possibly take that picture and furthermore insinuate she was going to have sex with Tommy?

She smiled

“Yeh were having fun weren’t yeh?”

She remained silent

“But ’m glad yeh ‘nd Tommy handled your differences” he said falling asleep

She melted into his chest not wanting to remember anything

The next day she Aria, Anne, and Gemma decided to clean up then treat themselves to dinner. She got multiple texts during the day. People were asking her about the picture.

Miranda: uh you need to call me NOW! i know your ass didnt fuck tommy

Miranda: you disappeared to Manchester whats up☹

Miranda: ARIA what did Tommy do to you? Why did Mimi call me crying???😭😭

Aria: i can’t talk about it Miranda, not now

Mimi: have you told him

Aria: not yet Mimi

Mimi: im not playing do it or I will

Aria: ok ok

~With Harry~

“Whoa Harry have you seen this?” Weezer asked

“Wha’?”

“Look” he looked at the heading Tommy G accused of sexual assault 2 victims have come forward the caption: ‘Both victims claim it happened in his house we will keep you posted’

He frowned “he didn't” he paused to think remembering the dirty glances he gave women

“I gotta find out more” Weezer said scrolling through his phone

As the day went on he couldn’t help but think about it. It gnawed at him this was her manager, someone who was close to her.

“Oh shit! Now they are saying one of the girls was assaulted the night he partied with Aria”

Harry tried to shake it off. “no he couln’ have”

Stevie rushed to him“Harry have you seen?”

“Yea” not wanting to be bothered by it

“No look!” Stevie said shoving the phone at him

Harry looked at him before grabbing the phone he read the words ‘A witness has stepped forward caught him in the act.’ As he read the details his heart rate picked up ‘…. walked in on him with his female artist.’ Tommy only managed Aria and another female artist who was absent that night

“Have yeh talked to Aria maybe its someone else” they tried to reason

“Did she tell you anything?” Gigi asked

He looked at them “no she would tell me”

When the day ended even Gemma got notifications on social media people were tagging her on the posts. Aria’s phone was buzzing nonstop.

Miranda: Aria

Miranda: dont ignore me im your best friend,…. thunder buddies for life

Miranda: Aria

Miranda: did it happen?

“Aria wha’s this?” Gemma asked showing her the article. Her heart sank reading the article Tommy was getting charged with sexual assault. Two victims identified one had yet to come forward. She was the remaining piece.

She shook her head “its nothing”

“They’re saying you’re the other woman is it true?”

“Other woman for what?” Anne asked taking the phone from Gemma’s hand

As Harry rushed to his mother’s house he thought to himself those pictures that were taken, she did look uncomfortable in Tommy’s embrace. The bruised wrist she explained away seemed to be the one he was holding behind her back. She also never got that drunk in public so it was strange that she got that drunk, even when she got drunk she was never that sloppy, falling all over the place hair in her face.

As Aria tried to convince Gemma and Anne that wasn’t her her phone lit up

Miranda: Shit is hitting the fan I hope you told him

Tommy: you bitch

Mimi: hope you told him

Aria felt her breathing hitch

“Aria this sounds like yeh!” Gemma said reading more articles

“It’s not” she whispered

Harry rushed through the kitchen door he walked in “Aria” he called

She smiled at him but stopped soon after his face was one she couldnt read ”….yes” she answered warily

“Yeh promise to tell me the truth?” it was supposed to be a statement but came out as a question

“Yes anything” she half smiled

“Wha’s wrong Harold?” his mother asked noticing his expression

He paused before speaking standing across from her. His eyes burrowing into her soul. “Wha’ happened that night at Tommy’s house?”

She looked down. Her nightmare was coming to life. It seemed forever when she heard her name being called.

“Aria” Harry called his eyes were becoming more bewildered by the second, her silence was confirming his gut instincts. She looked up at him before looking down. Pulling at her sleeves occupying her hands. She was losing the battle on holding back her tears. It wasn’t long before he called again.

“Aria… I asked yeh a question” his voice assertive he walked closer to her searching for her eyes. His breathing uneven. He needed her to tell him nothing happened. Everyone was looking at her waiting for an answer.

“ARIA!” he screamed in frustration. He startled them.

“Oi! Wha’s going on in here?” His dad asked walking in

The tears won they poured out of her eyes

“Aria tell me wha’ happened!” anger spewed in his voice

“Harold!” his mother scolded in a whisper

“Oh my god!” Gemma said in shock

The whole room came to the realization something dark happened that night. Her behavior made sense now the lack of appetite,the pale look on her face, the vomiting, the insomnia, the night mares.

“Aria” he whispered she had yet to speak. He needed her to say it was a joke. That there was no way it happened.

She looked up at him with tears rolling down her face, her hands were shaking pulling on her sleeve “please don’t make me go back to that night” she spoke softly

“Oh!” Anne grabbed her chest “yeh poor thing” Anne immediately rushed to her side and held her in a tight embrace.

“Harry he didn’…. did he?” Gemma looked at him hoping he could offer up a reason

He squatted down. Holding his head. There were no longer butterflies in his stomach from fear of the truth. Fear was replaced with anger which started from his chest and radiated out “ ’M GONNA KILL HIM!” He said standing up

“Oi! Stop that!”

“Dad not right now!” He paced the floor “…. That BASTARD put his hands on yeh? im going to kill him!

“CALM DOWN HAROLD!” His father said grabbing his shoulders

Aria sobbed in the background. He should have known something was wrong. Her eyes told him something was wrong they were filled with sorrow. He pushed passed his father going outside.

“Oi! come back’ere!” His father chased after him

Gemma knelt down next to her crying and hugging her “Im so sorry Aria”

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justventingjustventing-blog · 7 years

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ok so posting surveys on here in my new thing because i always wanna do it on facebook but never do because people i know dont need to know this shit about me and no one on here is going to read them so fuck yeah

basics what’s your name ➔nunya do you have a nickname ➔ biz do you have a middle name ➔ness do you like your name ➔ no my parents are awful people do people often mispronounce your name ➔ yes do you like the meaning of your name ➔ my name means “a queen in germany in the like 15oo’s” so yeah when is your birthday ➔ 4/20 how old are you ➔420 do you like your age ➔ well i can buy alcohal so yeah what’s your zodiac sign ➔ pisces

appearance what’s your hair colour ➔ sand is your current hair colour your natural hair colour ➔yes do you dye your hair ➔ twice do you have natural highlights ➔yeah bitches fuck yall when was the last time you had a haircut ➔2013 what length is your hair right now ➔ 3 large penises do you have straight, wavy or curly hair ➔ my hair is about as gay as me (its fucking straight) do you have frizzy hair ➔hell nah do you use a curling iron ➔no do you use a hair straightener ➔yes do you braid your hair ➔ when im bored what’s your eye colour ➔ grass do your eyes change colour ➔no but the lighting around them makes them look different colors do you wear contacts ➔ no if so, do you use colour contacts or regular contacts ➔no do you wear glasses ➔ no do you have naturally long eyelashes ➔i was born without eyelashes do you wear braces ➔ yeah but just as an accessory do you have dimples ➔yes do you have moles ➔i have frecles do you have outstanding cheekbones ➔well no but just because they didnt get an award in school doesnt mean their not smart do you have freckles ➔i have moles do you have piercings ➔ yes do you have tattoos ➔yes do you wear make up ➔yes do you paint your nails ➔no do you wear jewelry ➔ no are you happy with your height ➔ FUCK NO IM BARLEY TALL ENOUGH TO NOT NEED A FUCKING CAR SEAT personality would you consider yourself outgoing or shy ➔yes are you sarcastic ➔no what’s your biggest fear ➔fear itself what’s your guilty pleasure ➔mastication (yeah look back at it ya perv, read it wrong fucker.) are you religious ➔ yes do you get easily along with people ➔yes do you cry easily ➔yes

school (TRIGGER WARNING) do you go to middle school ➔ no? do you go to high school ➔ no? do you go to a private school ➔ no? are you home schooled ➔no what the fuck god have you gratuated from school ➔GOD what grade are you in ➔FUCK YOU have you skipped a grade ➔ IM NOT ANSWERING THE REST OF THE SCHOOL QUESTIONS have you been held back a grade ➔ have you ever failed a class ➔ have you been sent to the principals office ➔ have you skipped school ➔ have you cheated on a test ➔ family do you live with your biological parents ➔ yes do you get along with your parents ➔ yes do you tell your parents everything ➔ fuck no do you have strict parents ➔ im 19 so no I PAY TO LIVE THERE I JUST DONT NEED TO GET AN APARTMENT I SWEAR IM NOT GONNA STAY THERE FOREVER IM LEAVING TOWN IN LIKE 3 FUCKING MONTHS do you have siblings ➔i have a spawn of satan who used to share a room with me are you the oldest ➔ yes are you in the middle ➔no what the fuck god why does it make you go through all these just put it in one question damn are you the youngest ➔ are all of your grandparents still alive ➔ no friendships do you have a best friend ➔ yes do you have more than 10 friends ➔ fuck no do you have at least 2 friends you can trust with your life ➔lol probably not they never answer my calls and suck in general do you have a lot of guy friends, a lot of girl friends or equal girl and guy friends ➔im not in middle school ok i dont give a fuck do you text with your friends a lot ➔ of course i cant get mad at these stupid questions because i am the one that picked this one oh and also shout out to who ever made this thanks but you suck relationships what’s your relationship status ➔ MARRIED BITCH have you ever been in love ➔FUCKING DUH do you believe in love at first sight ➔NO have you ever been in a relationship ➔no have you ever had a secret admirer ➔idk??? if their secret how would i know damn have you ever been asked out on a date ➔ yes have you ever been kissed ➔no have you ever made out with someone ➔yes have you ever been cheated on ➔ yes have you ever been proposed to ➔ yes do you want to get married ➔nope do you want kids ➔dogs country where were you born ➔F where do you live right now ➔ U have you ever been out of the country ➔yes do you prefer country or city ➔country do you like sightseeing ➔yes is one or more of your parents from another country ➔no what places would you like to visit ➔ya moms house are you fluent in more than one language ➔si papi what languages can you speak ➔german health do you have any allergies ➔i am allergic to bullshit and with the evolving liberals in this country it has impaired me from going to work YOU PEOPLE OWE ME are you lactose intolerant ➔na have you had surgery ➔na have you had stitches ➔na have you broken a bone ➔ na has someone close to you died of a disease ➔ya do you exercise a lot ➔ na experiences have you ever had a near death experiene ➔everything out of my confort zone is a near death experience to me have you ever been on a plane ➔ ya have you ever had an allnighter ➔i have pulled an all nighter but i have never had one have you ever been to school/work after a sleepless night ➔no i just skip and then sleep. light burns my skin sometimes have you ever been in a physical fight ➔ya have you ever been to a wedding ➔my own have you ever been to a funeral ➔ yes have you ever lived in a different country ➔yes. america is a very different place and i would not suggest going there have you ever been drunk ➔ yes have you ever been trick or treating ➔ nope. jk yes my parents loved me have you ever been in a school play ➔yes. have you ever been to a camp ➔what kind of camp are we talking about? because honest to god no jokes aside i read it and thought it meant concentration camp but them i was like no fucking way thats awful no way thats what they mean have you ever driven a car ➔ WHAT AGE GROUP WAS THIS MEANT FOR skills how many languages are you fluent in ➔ YOU ALREADY ASKED THIS BITCH have you ever read a book in another language ➔yes but i had no idea what it was saying can you roll your tongue ➔ fuck yeah can you braid hair ➔already asked this question oml can you do a handstand ➔ yes if someone is holding my feet habits do you crack your knuckles ➔yeah and now i have to bitch do you bite your nails ➔no thats fucking gross do you bite your lips ➔why is this here but not smoking

favourites what’s your favourite movie ➔ donnie darko all the way motha fucka what’s your favourite tv show ➔shameless what’s your favourite book ➔ dont remember what its called but its a sex novel (and not 50 shade of grey fuck that shit) what’s your favourite song ➔ this question is so stupid everyone answers it by saying “idk theres so many” what’s your favourite colour ➔ㅠㅣㅐㅐㅇ ㅐㄱ뭏ㄷ lol im in korea and acedentally typed that. sorry if its offensive. what’s your favourite animal ➔ㄹ허ㅗㅎㄹㅀㅎㅅ쇼롷ㄹ홀쇼ㅗㅎㄹ what’s your favourite season ➔ ㅁ숒ㄷㅀㄷㄷㄴㅁㄷㅈㄱㄴㅇㅈㄷ퓨ㅕㅑㅁ퓨ㅗㅑㅕㅁㅎ러아호 this or that summer or winter ➔녀ㅡㅡㄷㄱ day or night ➔ㅜㅑ홋 cats or dogs ➔DOGS rain or shine ➔RAIN coffee or tea ➔TEA reading or writing ➔WRITING humorous or serious ➔SERIOUS DUH HAVE YOU NOT BEEN READING THIS brown or blue eyes ➔blue single or group dates ➔ well im not into orgies texts or calls ➔calls driving or walking ➔drive last last phone call ➔the hub hub last text ➔ditto last song you listened to ➔some song the hubs was listening to while we were on the phone last thing you ate ➔dick last thing you drank ➔water last purchase ➔food last time you cleaned your room ➔ literally never last time you’ve been on a date ➔yesterday

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