#damn problem in the first place
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the thing is. I've said many times that it'd probably be better if I didn't post on here so much, especially when I'm not doing so great. it does not feel good. but. when I don't, it just all stays inside my head and it feels so much worse for far longer, so I really just don't know how I would cope without this.
#I mean I used to write in my diary instead. but it's not the same. it's like talking to myself which is like thinking which is the whole#damn problem in the first place#I can't bother my friends every time I feel like shit because it happens so much#and they don't get it#except my best friend but I already message them too much and they have their own shit going on#it's either this or lie in bed imagining [current blorbo] and talking it all out with them and basically just. daydreaming therapy.#but that tends to not be great because then I get stuck and don't want to do anything else because I'd rather be there forever.#which. idk but it doesn't feel that healthy to me.#I juuust want to be normal it's all I want it's all I've ever wanted#and then people say being weird is good and they love me for who I am and it's so so sweet and lovely but. I don't mean that. I mean I feel#like I'm insane and there's something wrong with my brain and it's not the fun quirky bits that people love about me. it's the never ending#constant relentless bad thoughts that I can't make go away OR even the good ones really. like I'm. so fucking obsessed right now and all I#want is to think about Dan and Jenkins but if I'm not careful it takes over everything and I. can not stop.#so. yeah I'm. not gonna leave because I can't and I don't really want to and I'm sorry because that means I'll have to keep posting#dumb shit like this every time my brain gets stupid#😭
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just saw someone say Rick Riordan making a TV show is just as bad as anything JKR has done. BFFR you're comparing Rick Riordan trying to make his world more inclusive, changing some parts because of money/time constraints, or just making changes cus he thinks they're needed, to JKR being a terrible person!
#and not to say Ricks work is perfect. ill be the firat to tell you his mistakes. his aspec rep is shit. his minorities rep has problems#he has general time line problems. im not says hes perfect but he tried from a good place#jkr named a character ChoChang. her Scottish character blow stuff up and tried to make alcohol. named a black character Shackelbolt#like damn get over yourself.#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#percy jackson and the olympians#percy series#pjo series#pjo#pjo tv show#pjo tv series#pjo tv adaptation#if you wanna say shit about Rick ok. but be correct about it#how is he just as bad as jkr for not using the book he made in the early 2000s an exact script for the TV show being released in 2024?#and they yall had the audacity to be pissed when he didn't put a song about sex thats literally says `fuck her face° in the background of#LITERAL 12 YEAR OLDS in a place with memory altering properties..... thats whats you wanted. children getting high to a song about sex.#°oH bUt iN tHe mOvIe tHaT i WaTcHeD wHeN i waS tWeLvE' where the actors where like what 18? and weren't 12? that one? 🙄#some of you are getting on my nerves. yes the show's pacing is eh really thats a reason to curisfy Rick Riordan? thats what you're deciding#this is the line? a tv show thats on its first season and is more accurate then the movies that came out?#good to know
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Guys you have to start going to brick and mortar stores again instead of buying every little damn thing online. I am so serious
#saying this bc look I don’t like joann’s fabrics as much as the next person#but looking at the chap 11 closures is truly hellish. we only have 3 of these stores in our state and they’re closing two of them#and I can’t help but think about how few options those communities will have to get anything afordable once they’re gone#and I’ve looked it up multiple times for my own purposes: there are so few fabric stores elsewhere in the state. like these go down#and online shopping will be the only option. and especially with something like fabric that can be a huge problem!#sometimes the websites can be reliable enough to tell you thread count and weave and weight but there are soooo many websites that do not#so you could easily get stuck with some fucked fabric and then what!#not to mention on top of shipping shit can get super fucking expensive real quick#and sure joanns is faaaaar from perfect but jesus at least I can go there and scope out the fabric properly#I’m lucky my own local joanns is staying open but holy fuck it��s so bad!!!#like does nobody else see that buying everything online is draining places of local resources and furthering our enslavement to capitalism?#or is it just fucking me????#god DAMN#also this should go without saying that you absolutely should shop local places first too#but like also I get it bc even one of my local places sells their linen for like 40 bucks a yard which is nuts so just. please as long as#you’re not feeding the devil called amazon for god’s sake
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can't believe I have to apply for an eta/visa to go to the UK </3
#damn you brexit#extremely first world problems but I'm so used to traveling within places I have citizenship to or is within schengen#skog speaks
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Imagine a like minds summer. Same characters same time, just summer. How would Alex and Nigel meet? Interact? What different exterior force would force them to meet. Or would Nigel seek Alex out due to him being in his radar. (due to his beliefs of their father’s club) lol imagine Nigel stalking Alex and planning a special meet up only for Alex to blow him off.
Alex also living at the school. Imagine the bullshit they’d get up to in a mostly empty school all to their selves.
What were Alex’s father’s rules during the summer when everyone else was gone? (I just know Alex broke most of them) what other types of mischief did he, Josh, and Raj get up too. When and where (if) did they meet up?
Maybe they couldn’t meet up much and Alex would be left even more alone. (Which is perfect for Nigel to get to him)
Alex and Nigel could have also met if both of their fathers brought them to one of their meetings or whatever the club does, and they meet in the early summer. Having around two months. I bet they’d only have a few days or couple weeks of them not bickering.(or trying to hurt one another)
All the victims would still be dead of course, just slightly different situations leading up to the events.
Perhaps one of the rare times that Alex gets to meet up with Josh is when they plan to mess with Nigel. Making Nigel come ‘meet up with Alex’ then drugging him and getting him in the train. Then Josh dies and Alex feels even more guilty.
They could meet Susan at a corner store where she’s working for the summer. Alex would know her because he goes there often to get snacks and better food than the school food. Nigel would still see her as Alex’s Maraclea and would kill her.
Viewing it as a film, I think it would have a bit of a lighter feeling than the original, but still have its dark undertones. A lot of scenes would be at dusk and dawn. (I’m a firm believer in sunrise Alex and sunset Nigel)
Nigel’s death would come with the same fate. It would still be at the train tracks and it would be raining, but the sun would rise just a bit earlier and the clouds would eventually drift off, and Alex would be faced with it all.(being dragged away from Nigel’s body just as the sun peaks through, he is reborn) 9 months from August would be May.
I’d like to think that it would be the summer in-between the last school year. Alex coming back after missing the first month of school due to being detained for questioning. And being known as the faulty son who watched as a boy killed himself after killing his parents. (If the public even knew that) Alex would be absolutely haunted throughout that year. Quiet like he’s never been before. Then in May he disappears and no one can find him. He’s now carrying on Nigel’s legacy. Susans card is found and he becomes a suspect for her death.
But he is free. The weather is warm and Alex is reminded of Nigel, he must complete the cycle.
I would totally write a fic but I have no knowledge of what a teenager 2006 British summer looks like. I don't even know what a 2025 British summer looks like.
#I love spewing nonsense#imagine them getting an ice cream treat - Alex would totally get a brain freeze#idk if it’s obvious but I NEEED summer rn I miss the sun so much#nigel would look almost ghostly in the sunlight cause he wouldn’t tan he’d just burn#Alex’s freckles would double in number#that is if either of them go out lmao#I wonder if that damn school would have good air conditioning- it really depends it looks old but rich so who knows about the student dos#dorms**#hmm would Nigel’s parents be away for most of the summer and he’d be all alone to his own devices#omg he’s such a freaky little shit#they’d come back and then die lol maybe like the same night or the next day after coming back#oh and then poor Susan just doing her job and gets murdered by the emo kid who came in with the cute redhead who stops by a lot#maybe I should write a fic even if it’s not fully accurate- problem is I’ve never written a fic before#but there’s always a first for everything#it was above 5 degrees Celsius so I’m very happy rn that’s why my thoughts are all over the place#I’ll probably edit this later cause omg is this absolute shit 😭#like minds#like minds 2006#nigel colbie#likeminds#alex forbes
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The dichotomy of true crime is that while one chunk of fuckers involved in it at licking boots like fucking fudgepops, harassing victims' families, and making accusations of people with no evidence, another chunk is sitting there minding their own business aside from going further and further down the 'fuck cops' rabbit hole with every other story they learn.
#was thinking about the current ceo shooting mess#and how many people just assume because the cops say this guy did it that means he did it#and was reminded of a case i saw a video on recently where the sole suspect was brought in because a retired officer#claimed he could 'tell' from looking at him that he'd murdered his missing sister#was interrogated by increasingly hostile cops for hours as they demanded to know where he'd left the body#only for her to walk out the damn woods soon after more or less okay and corroborating his story#like folks just because the cops say something doesn't make it true#they will make shit up wholesale just to avoid having to do their jobs#and that's when they aren't the ones causing the problem in the first place
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waoow i’m really exhausted and feel like shit from working overtime every single day this week and i have a really bad headache so tried to ask my m*ther as nicely as i possibly could if she could try to keep it tdown as much as possible while she cooks and she acted like i was being so unreasonable and having all this attitude like i literally don’t know what anyone wants from me anymore i don’t know i just don’t
#i try so god damn fucking hard to understand people#and to take up as little space as possible and never cause problems or have needs or anything#because god forbid i act like a person instead of a little toy doll for everyone to project themselves onto#i don’t know anymore i really don’t im so tired of it all#the worst part is i was hesitant to ask her in the first place#cause whenever i ask for things i either get yelled at or accused of being selfish#but i thought if i really made sure to phrase it as politely and gently as possible maybe it would be okay#but no i still ended up being in the wrong. every fucking time. no matter what i do. i’m so goddamn over it all#snow.txt
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So you're telling me the fia are giving Carlos a 10-place penalty after he had to replace his car parts that got damaged in their shitty track that they deemed fit for them to drive on??!

#las vegas gp 2023#f1#fia#carlos sainz#you create a problem and you're solving it by giving him penalty????#where's the invested money in this gp go?#fix the damned track first before you advertise for this shit show#10-place penalty my ass#it's not even Sunday and you want to throw him at the back?!
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Being undiagnosed autistic with a diagnosed autistic brother can be really fucking annoying sometimes because if you don’t want to do something because it’s overstimulating for you you will have to suck it up simply because “your brother can handle it so can you” and its like AAAAAA I WANT TO RIP MY HAIR OUT
#aaronymous ramblings#vent#also i dont think my accommodations are unreasonable?#my mom always treats me like im the most selfish person in the world for saying ‘oh id rather just stay home you go out and have fun with#my brother’ and somehow thats like the worst thing ever#i get shes my mom and she gets worried about me but like i can legally drive i have a JOB i go to COLLEGE let me make my own decisions damn#having a family dynamic like this is like being infantilized and treated like the villain at the same time its like what#like god forbid I dont wanna sit outside in an overstimulating place for 6 hours straight and then go on a boat ride which you know I#notoriously get really anxious and panicky on like#if i dont go she acts like im selfish and if i do go she mocks me for being grumpy like no shit i dont wanna be here i wouldnt be annoying#you by me just being upset and trying my best not to express it if you let me not come#i thought i was bending a knee to her by agreeing to try new things and go out in the first place and idk#she just does not at all understand my perspective#god forbid someone’s form of relaxation is watching tv instead of sitting on a texture they hate with loud noises and people wverywhere with#nothing to do at all#AAAAAAAA#first world problems i know#this is why i hate vacations btw#i should have stayed home like my other brother he is way better with boundaries than i am
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Darn my hopeless romantic tendencies, I know kisses are murder to write, but I keep putting them in my fanfics!!!!
#it's not a makeout scene it doesn't even last long at all it's just a soft sweet kiss that should only last a couple sentences or so#BUT IT IS STILL MURDER TO WRITE#it's the shortness and simplicity that makes it so tricky in the first place#it would be a nightmare if I tried to write something steamy 'cause I don't know how the fuck to do that nor do I want to#but pulling off a romantic moment with all the fluffy feels without going into detail about the sensations involved#it's like a drabble speedrun#you got even fewer words to work with but still wanna make the moment count#and there's the mechanics of the situation#the choreography if you will#what's the most natural way to move when you're in that position?#is it gonna be like halfway upside down or can it be straight on?#it's hard to figure these things out when you have no practical experience#damn it Cisco you weren't even supposed to be in this fic and now I have to figure out the physics of an over the shoulder kiss#writer problems
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also, hello padisarah nonnie !! it's good to see you again :>
i decided to not answer your ask regarding the wholeeee stuff.. because i don't really care what they want to do anymore. i've done my part of speaking up about their behaviours and calling them out - which made a lot of people open their eyes for once instead of ignoring the warnings they got from me or other people. and i think that's all i want to do.
THIS WILL FORMALLY BE THE LAST POST ABOUT THEM. I will not answer any asks regarding it anymore, so if you want to make your own posts regarding those users, please use your own platforms, thank you.
as much as i encourage speaking up, i also don't want to give a flying duck about them anymore. y'know, like, i spoke up because i couldn't tolerate them and their behaviours anymore - couldn't just keep quiet when my mutuals are knowingly or unknowingly talking to shitty people like that. if they started a new blog, just let them. i don't really care anymore 😭 all i hope is that my mutuals and those that see this are more aware of internet safety and who you surround yourself with. it was already exhausting trying to warn others about them and not being listened to until i made this shit public — i'm not going to start becoming a blog that runs on discourse just so some can finally realise that this person was shitty and that person was the devil.
thanks for also caring abt me and informing me of their new url, i appreciate that a lot! it's on my blocklist now + the mutuals they've tagged on that post too 💀 if, however, i blocked you without a good reason why, or if i blocked you before you knew of this and had already cut ties with them, feel free to send me a message or ask on a different blog! i took precautionary blocks when it comes to having those kind of people as mutuals so .. yeah.
#visitors from teyvat : padisarah anon#thea answers#the post was made because i just couldn't stand the audacity of certain people still claiming to be the victim.#imagine claiming yourself as the victim when your story wasn't even straight.#venting in public but you can't even pick a plot. were you banned or did you leave willingly first without being punished?#then proceeded to say you were wrongly banned when you were literally guilttripping the mods . what did you think-#was gonna happen when you come back? did you think our arms were open then?#you left first . to avoid consequences . now that the consequences are staring right at you#you chicken out? you curse at the effects of your actions? YOUR actions? what about the people you've affected .#you say you aren't the same person you are a year ago but you only left a few months ago and you still affect the mental health of many .#our server wasn't even a mental health server. it's a positivity server. you're supposed to use it to get serotonin boosts#or boost other people. not a place for us to be your therapists and fix your problems.#i still can't get over the fact that neither of them can get their stories straight. wdym a year ago lmao. it was literally 4-5 months ago.#and you still act the same as ever. venting about how you wanted to kys or break down when a damn post unrelated to you talks-#-abt ur fav character in a scenario where they don't love you.#do you realize that the artists and writers' works you consume are for the general and not just you. what is your logic .#and i know you see this . you vague about us all the time. did you think i didn't notice.#the only mercy i've granted you was the peace for 4 months. you tell me i was dogpiling on you but you didn't change at all . so entitled t#-your ways of thinking and what you think is right.#in the first few weeks of u in that server i was the only one who thought better of u. funny how that turned out.#cuz u didn't change then and you wouldn't change now.#idk how many times i hv to repeat this but i blocked each n every ONE of them. including their moots.#and including anyone who interacted with them. im not sorry. if you were wrongly blocked then u can shoot a dm.#otherwise stay blocked and stay mad loser L.
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still thinking abt fairy tail like idk if i can actually articulte why i wouldnt recommend it to anyone despite liking it so much? like its a generic shounen story but i did in fact enjoy it (until the end but thats like a staple to the genre at this point i think) but gun to my head i wouldnt be able to tell you what abt it i would change to make it better
#i am admittedly not a very creative person in the first place#i think as like a starter anime its a good one to like ease you into it? bc again its very generic and also no one dies lmao and its not par#particulrly deep and is like the face of the power of friendship solving all your problems#i guess maybe more worldbuilding?? which is insane consider how much worldbuilding there is?#or like#maybe expanded worldbuilding#a more interconnected storyline mayhaps bc everything kinda happens in blocks#like having very visible indicators between arcs isnt bad but again they barely flow#its plot moved rather than character moved#so perhaps more character moved#i think what it is is that its all very BLAND and generic#but it was like one of the first animes i watched so it has a very special place in my heart#and also the more i find out abt op the more im like oh yeah this is so obviously influenced by it 💀#i think ft problem is that it was obvs made to be long running#so new plots were conceived to just elongate the overarching story#is the impression i get which is possibly why it feels so unconnected#its like ok this thing happened now moving on to another thing and its just like that all the time#wish the character relationships got fleshed out more :(#wish LUCY FUCKING HEARTFILIA got to have more chances to shine god damn#*clenched fist* i will NOT rewatch ft i wont i refuse#michi tag
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I'e been fairly clear about the fact that I don't like Draco (I stand by this), but I will say his arc wouldve been far more coherent if he hadnt tried to actively capture Harry during the battle of Hogwarts. As it is, he made a few steps towards the beginning of what could be a redemption arc, and then ran 20 ft backwards, slapped someone on the head, and everyone reacted like he had taken steps forward. maddening.
Having him helping Harry would be out of character I think (even if you like him, you have to admit that Draco Malfoy's primary, most consistent and enduring trait is cowardice), but even that would work better than what happened
#jk r-on top of being an all around awful human being-is a horrible writer who would not know what makes a good redemption arc#if it shot her in the foot. and that is why snape and malfoy are Like That™.#related side note. theres honestly a pretty simple solution to the death eater problem with snape.#why not just have him have chosen to join the death eaters as a spy for dumbledore.#in the first place.#it doesnt fix all the problems with him (he still bullies children because of a childhood grudge)#but having him not willingly join a hate group does fix a damn lot. it doesnt even change shit.#sorry i dont care about these characters very much often but sometimes i do see the vague shadow of something nearly well written in them.#it is quite frustrating. to be honest.#not so fun fact in my recent reread of dh#did you remember that in the last sentence before the prologue#harry hopes his slave (kreacher) will make him a sandwich. what a great book series.#lyn.txt#draco#deathly hollows is such a mess rivaled only by books 3 (and arguably 6)#but at least poa is fun something dh rarely has going for it
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shy girls suck the best!
fratjo x nerd!reader, fluff & smut, m receiving, overstimulation, whimpering toru. 3.5k wc, 18+ only, MDNI.
satoru gojo is experienced.
he’s cocky for a reason. he’s made girls scream his name more times than he can count, and he knows exactly how to make someone fold in under five minutes—ten if he’s playing nice. he’s all confidence, charm, and unearned a’s from professors who don’t want to deal with his antics. his reputation precedes him in every room, and he walks like the world’s already bent over backwards just to please him.
everything about him screams untouchable, and he’s used to people treating him that way. he wears his varsity jacket like armor, a walking billboard of fratboy glory, all swagger and smirks and lazy confidence that makes people gravitate toward him like he’s got his own gravity field.
but then there’s you.
the shy girl in glasses, always scribbling in your notebook with an absurdly cute pen, whispering apologies when you bump into people, hiding in the back row of class like you owe the world an explanation just for existing. you don’t talk unless spoken to, don’t make eye contact, and definitely don’t give satoru the attention he’s used to. it’s not that you’re cold—it’s that you seem like you live in your own quiet little world, and satoru’s never wanted to be invited somewhere so badly.
and maybe what undoes him first is that he sees you before you see him. you’re already there, present in the corners of his attention before he understands why he’s looking. he notices you one day during lecture, tucking your hair behind your ear as you underline a sentence three times with an intense little frown. it doesn’t seem like much. but something in him clicks.
at first it’s curiosity. then amusement. then it festers into irritation—because why the fuck aren’t you reacting to him like everyone else?—and then fascination. and then something deeper that coils in his chest and makes his throat tight every time he sees you. he tries not to care. he wants not to care. but you’re already rooting yourself in places inside him he didn’t know were hollow.
satoru notices you because you don’t notice him. not the way everyone else does. you don’t flutter your lashes when he smirks. you don’t laugh at his jokes like they’re scripture. you don’t even flinch when he calls you “baby” out of nowhere—just blink at him like he’s an equation you don’t understand. it bruises his ego. and for some unholy reason, he loves it.
the problem is, you’re not immune to him at all. you’re just hiding it better than anyone ever has.
because what he doesn’t know is—you’ve always had a crush on him. from the very first time he walked into class, sleepy-eyed and bright-smiled, wearing that damn jacket like it belonged on a movie screen. you just figured he’d never notice someone like you. so you admired from afar. watched him flirt with others, watched the way he filled a room with laughter, memorized the cadence of his voice like it was part of your playlist.
your crush was harmless. private. something you never expected to act on. you played it safe. after all, guys like satoru gojo don’t fall for quiet girls with awkward posture and color-coded notes.
but maybe that’s what draws him in—the absence of performance. the quiet genuine way you exist. no theatrics. no games. just you, completely unaware that you’ve started haunting his every thought.
it starts small.
he catches himself watching the way your hands move. the way your nose scrunches when you’re deep in thought. the way you roll your pen between your fingers when you're anxious. it becomes a loop, a soft little addiction. he remembers details he shouldn’t. what color post-its you use. your preferred snack during study sessions. your favorite seat in the library. you don’t change. he just tunes in.
and then, one day, he realizes he’s rearranging his life around yours.
he starts showing up everywhere you are. loiters in the library, conveniently always around during your shifts at the campus café, makes excuses to sit next to you in class. offers to carry your books, asks you about calculus even though he already passed it. satoru gojo, golden boy of his frat, reducing himself to extra tutoring just to see you smile. it’s humiliating in theory, but it feels like worship in practice.
and it’s not just your smile. it’s the way you get passionate when you talk about obscure theories. the way you light up when you don’t think anyone’s watching. the way you stammer when he gets too close, but don’t pull away.
you don’t feed his ego. you feed something softer. quieter. something he didn’t think he had in him. he tells himself it’s because you’re innocent. because you’re shy and sweet and you deserve to be treated right.
he wants to be good for you. slow, patient, gentle. he holds doors open. he listens. he lets you rant about your thesis for forty-five uninterrupted minutes and actually understands it. he even looks up the books you reference, reads them just to impress you. he takes an annotated copy of your favorite book. he starts writing your name in the corners of his notebook like some love-struck high schooler. you haunt him in the best way.
and then—you kiss him.
it’s after a late-night study session. the campus is quiet. the lights in the library flicker like they’re caught between timelines. your voice shakes when you say “thank you for walking me back.” you pause, fidget with the strap of your bag. and then, like you’ve been gearing up for battle, you rise onto your toes and kiss him.
it’s chaste. hesitant. warm. like you're afraid he'll vanish if you lean in too much.
you pull back like you’ve done something wrong, but satoru’s frozen, staring at you like he’s just been baptized. you’re blushing so hard he can feel the heat radiating off your skin.
“you… sure?” he whispers, voice ragged, leaning in like he’s afraid you’ll disappear.
you nod, barely audible: “i’ve read… a lot. i think… i wanna try. with you.”
and he short circuits.
he thought he’d lead. thought he’d ease you into it, kiss your forehead, hold your hand like a gentleman. but then your hands are on his chest, pushing up under his shirt—the varsity jacket creaking as it shifts on his shoulders, the cotton brushing your fingertips. your eyes are searching his like you’re looking for confirmation that he’s real. you study every reaction like a research project. when he shivers, you smile, barely-there, and go back to tracing the line of his abs with trembling fingertips.
it’s not even mischief.
it’s curiosity. slow-burning, chest-aching, and barely held together by your own hesitation. the sort of yearning that tastes like nervous giggles and the edge of something terrifyingly new. you pause between touches like you're checking your hypothesis, calculating the way his muscles tense under your fingers. each brush of your skin feels like a question he's too dazed to answer properly.
“does that… feel good?” you whisper, lips barely moving, as though you’re scared to break the spell.
“f-fuck—yes, baby, yeah,” he gasps, throwing his head back, one hand clutching the edge of the couch like it’s the only thing keeping him grounded.
your lips trail down his throat, each kiss a trembling prayer, following a path only you can see. his skin is fever-hot, tasting of mint and salt, boyish charm unraveling under your mouth. when you press a soft, open-mouthed kiss to his collarbone, his pulse jumps, a twitch rippling beneath your lips. his breath catches, a sharp stutter that makes his chest lurch, and his hands hover, fingers flexing like he’s afraid touching you will break the spell.
satoru gojo—fratboy, golden boy, untouchable—is quiet. too quiet. his eyes are hazy, pupils wide and unfocused, lips parted like words have abandoned him. his varsity jacket is bunched at his elbows, leather creaking, shirt rucked up to his ribs, abs clenching under your trembling fingers. he could take charge, flip this with a smirk—he’s done it countless times, effortless and expert. but now? he just watches, reverent, like you’re a deity he’s too awestruck to approach.
he’s known mouths. polished ones with perfect rhythm, greedy ones that took without giving, bold ones that knew every angle. but yours? it’s hesitant, new, like you’re crossing a threshold you’re not sure you’re worthy of. the way you look at him—eyes flickering behind slipping glasses, wide with awe—shouldn’t hit this hard. shouldn’t feel this fucking intense. but your fingers, shaking as they tug at his waistband, send a jolt through him that makes his vision spark.
satoru’s hand grazes your cheek, a trembling brush of knuckles. “baby… keep going. please.”
you nod, glasses sliding, your breath hitching as your fingers slip under his jeans, easing them down. your eyes flick up, catching his—flushed, jaw tight, his whole body fighting to stay still. it hits you like a blade: he’s done this a thousand times, fucked girls who knew every trick, but you’ve got him like this. trembling. aching. satoru gojo, invincible, unraveling because of you.
guilt stabs your chest, sharp and fleeting. you shouldn’t have him like this, shouldn’t be the reason his hands clutch the couch like it’s his only anchor. he’s always cocky, untouchable, the center of every orbit. now he’s breaking, and it’s your fault—your lips, your touch, your fault. but the guilt only fans the heat in your core, makes your thighs press together as you lean closer, your breath ghosting over his skin.
satoru is used to being wanted. but not like this. not with this aching, earnest hunger that makes his chest tighten.
you press shaky, open-mouthed kisses to his hip, tongue flicking out to taste the salt of his skin. spit gathers at the corner of your mouth, a slick trail left behind as you suck softly at the sensitive skin just above his cock. he jolts, hips jerking before he catches himself, a low curse slipping free, his hands clenching until his knuckles bleach. the sound he makes—fuck, it’s a choked gasp, raw and ragged, like you’ve torn it from his core.
you shift lower, hands sliding up his thighs, fingers digging into the taut muscle. your kisses grow bolder, sloppier, your tongue dragging along the crease where his thigh meets his groin, leaving a glistening streak of drool that catches the dim light.
he tastes like heat and need, and the way his skin trembles under your mouth makes your own pulse hammer. you pause, lips hovering over his cock, spit pooling on your tongue, and glance up—his head is thrown back, throat bobbing as he swallows, a groan clawing its way out of him.
“holy shit—baby, you—fuck,” satoru gasps, eyes snapping open, blown wide as his hand grips the couch, fabric groaning under his fist.
you take him in your mouth, lips wrapping around the tip, soft and slick with spit that drips down his length. your tongue swirls, slow and deliberate, tracing the ridge as drool spills from the corners of your mouth, coating him in a wet sheen.
he’s hot, heavy against your tongue, and you hum—a low, vibrating sound that pulls a whimper from his throat. your fingers curl around the base, stroking in time with the bob of your head, slick with the spit that pools at his base, making your grip slippery. you suck, gentle at first, then harder, lips stretching around him as spit slicks your chin, a glistening trail dripping onto his thighs.
he’s panting, desperate, each breath a ragged plea. his abs flex, thighs trembling under your palms, and he’s biting back whimpers, trying not to overwhelm you. that restraint—fuck, it’s gorgeous, the way his jaw clenches, the way his eyes flutter shut like he’s fighting to stay grounded. he doesn’t push, doesn’t guide, just moans your name like it’s a prayer, raw and broken. “that’s it, baby—fuck—just like that—your mouth’s so fucking perfect—”
the satoru gojo is unraveling, and it’s because of you. the way you glance up, glasses fogging, eyes glassy with effort, lips shiny and stretched around him, spit dripping down your chin in messy strings. the way your tongue flicks, catching the sensitive spot under the head, makes his hips buck, a choked sob escaping.
your hand slides lower, fingers brushing his balls, tentative but deliberate, slick with the drool that’s pooled at his base. you cup them, rolling gently, and his whole body seizes, a string of curses spilling out as his hand fists the couch tighter, the fabric creaking under the strain.
he’s had every fantasy, every trick, but this—your mouth, slow and reverent, full of wonder, messy with spit that coats him like a second skin—hits like a fucking freight train. it’s too much, too good. he wants to last, to let you explore, but you’re too fucking intent.
you hollow your cheeks, sucking harder, tongue swirling in tight, wet circles, spit bubbling at the corners of your mouth as you take him deeper, throat tightening around him. he chokes, hips jerking as his control frays. “gonna—baby, gonna cum, wait, fuck—”
you don’t stop. your lips slide further, tongue flattening, taking him as deep as you can. it’s filthy—spit drips down your chin in thick strings, pooling on his thighs, your glasses fogging as breaths puff through your nose. you’re focused, watching his every twitch, adjusting when he gasps, slowing when he whimpers, like you’re mapping him.
his hand grips the couch, knuckles white, and he breaks with a sound that’s barely human—a shattered cry as he spills, hot and pulsing against your tongue.
you try to swallow it all, but it’s overwhelming—cum mixes with the spit already coating your lips, spilling past them in a slick, messy rush, dripping down your chin, onto his thighs, and pooling on the couch. you pull back, gasping, wiping your mouth with trembling fingers, but the slickness clings, smearing across your skin as your eyes stay wide behind crooked glasses. he’s trembling, chest heaving, shirt clinging to sweat-slick skin, pupils blown like he’s seen the divine.
you should stop.
you fucking should.
he’s wrecked, twitching, fucked out beyond reason. but the ache in your chest—the sharp, flickering guilt of breaking him—only makes you hungrier. you lick your lips, tasting the salty mix of him, and your thighs press together, a soft whimper escaping as you lean in again, spit still clinging to your chin.
“just once more?” you whisper, voice barely audible, like you’re afraid the words will burn you.
his eyes flutter open, unfocused, dazed. he groans, raw and low. “baby… you’re gonna fucking kill me.”
but he doesn’t stop you. doesn’t even try.
you start again, slower, your mouth softer but hungrier, lips wrapping around him with a reverence that makes him twitch instantly. he’s sensitive, still pulsing, and the second your tongue grazes him, he whines—a high, broken sound that makes your stomach twist. you suck lightly, lips gliding along his length, spit pooling at the base and dripping onto his thighs in slow, glistening trails.
satoru buries his face in a cushion, muffling a sob. “s-sensitive—fuck, it’s too much—”
his thighs tremble under your hands, hips jerking as you kiss the tip, tongue darting out to lap at the bead of cum still leaking from him, your spit mixing with it in a slick, glossy sheen. you linger, savoring the taste, the way it coats your tongue in a sticky film, and he whimpers again, louder, his hand flying to his mouth to bite his knuckles.
your fingers slide to his balls again, rolling them gently, slick with the drool and cum that’s dripped down, making your touch slippery and warm. he arches, a desperate, “please—fuck—please—” spilling from his lips like he’s begging for mercy but craving more.
you don’t rush. your tongue traces every inch, slow and deliberate, swirling around the head before dipping lower, dragging along the vein with a wet, sloppy kiss that leaves a trail of spit in its wake. your breath is hot, teasing, each exhale making him twitch, and you pause to suck at the base, lips lingering as your tongue flicks out, tasting the musk of him through the sticky mess. his hand finds your hair, fingers threading loosely, not pushing, just holding—like he needs to feel you’re real.
you grow bolder, hungrier, your lips tightening as you take him deeper, throat fluttering around him, spit bubbling up and spilling over, coating his cock in a thick, glossy layer. you hum, low and vibrating, and he chokes, a wet, pathetic whimper breaking free.
your hand strokes the base, slick with spit and cum, fingers sliding in the mess, and you slide a finger lower, brushing the sensitive skin behind his balls, now slippery with the drool that’s dripped down. he jolts, a high, keening sound tearing from his throat, his hips bucking as his whole body trembles.
“baby—god—please—fuck, i can’t—” satoru’s voice cracks, raw and whining, as you suck harder, tongue swirling in relentless, wet circles, spit and cum mixing in a frothy mess that drips onto the couch. every noise is desperate—gasps, whimpers, sobs that he tries to muffle but can’t. his body arches, twitching like he’s unraveling at the seams, and you feel it: the moment he breaks again.
he cums with a wail, sudden and violent, hips jerking as he spills into your mouth. it’s messier, hotter, a flood of cum and spit that overwhelms you, spilling out in thick, sticky ropes that coat your lips, your chin, your glasses, dripping onto his thighs and pooling in the creases of his skin.
you swallow what you can, lips still wrapped around him, tongue lapping at the oversensitive tip through the slick mess until he’s twitching, a broken, “n-no more—please—” escaping as he clutches the cushion.
time slips. minutes? hours? you’re tugging his shirt, pulling him closer like he’s the only thing keeping you grounded. ten minutes later, he’s gripping the sheets, praying, fucked senseless by every move you make. you flinch when he whines too loud, hands flying to your mouth, eyes wide with guilt—but then you lean in again, bolder, hungrier, chasing every twitch, every broken gasp of your name.
he’s never felt so cherished and so destroyed at the same time.
every touch is careful, but determined. you’re hesitant but thorough, like you’ve read the same passage in a smutty fanfiction a hundred times and are finally getting the chance to test it out. and the worst part? you’re good at it. really good.
your mouth, your hands, the way you watch his face for every twitch of pleasure—it’s enough to make him lose all sense of pride. the way you keep glancing at his reactions, as if adjusting your technique in real time, is insane. terrifying. he’s never been studied so hard. he likes it. he needs it. he’s suffering in the best way.
he’s never had to hold back like this. never had to breathe through it. never felt this fucking sensitive. he’s gripping the cushions like a man possessed. he’s whispering your name like a prayer. he’s not even sure he’s still speaking coherent sentences. you’ve wrecked him. utterly and entirely.
you pull back, panting, your hands shaking as you adjust your glasses, eyes glassy and wide. your lips are swollen, chin wet with a glistening mix of spit and cum, and you lick them, tasting him again, a soft moan slipping free as your thighs press together.
satoru is ruined—sprawled on the couch, shirt clinging to his chest, chest heaving like he’s fought a war. his hand is still in your hair, loose, trembling, and he’s staring at you like you’re a fucking goddess.
“thought you were the innocent one,” he chokes out, breathless, watching you nibble your lip and adjust your glasses with shaking fingers.
“i still am,” you murmur, face tucked into his shoulder. “kind of.”
he huffs out a laugh, dazed and wrecked. he can feel your heartbeat against his ribs. he doesn’t want to move. his hands are still trembling from how hard he tried to keep it together for you—and yet, you’re the one who took the lead. you’re the one who made him forget how to function. you kiss the edge of his jaw, soft and uncertain, and it undoes him more than anything else.
satoru gojo, campus heartthrob, ruined by a shy nerd girl who reads too much smut on her kindle late at night under the covers. who probably has a secret ao3 account and bookmarked folders. who looks like a timid schoolgirl but fucks like she’s been studying him like a midterm exam. and passed with extra credit. honors. valedictorian. summa cum laude of making him lose his damn mind.
he’s never been so obsessed.
and you? you’re already pressing your forehead to his chest, voice small, eyes wide with want and something raw and messy and needy as you look up at him.
“can we… try again? i think i missed a step.”
he doesn’t know if he wants to laugh, cry, or propose.
he’s never been more in love. and all he knows is he’s done for.
#౨ৎ — filed reports#gojo satoru#satoru gojo#jjk gojo#jujutsu kaisen#gojo fluff#gojo smut#jjk fluff#jjk smut#gojo x reader fluff#gojo x reader smut#gojo x reader#gojo x female reader#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru x you#gojo satoru x y/n#satoru gojo x reader#satoru gojo x you#satoru gojo x y/n#jjk x reader#reader insert
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hey did you know??? that if you stop stretching and maintaining mobility in your body then it goes away?? things get tight and you can't move the way that you used to??? and when you decide to try getting a stretch routine going that the first week fucking sucks because you keep going 'damn i used to be able to do this no problem' and then you have to switch gears and be kind to yourself and just focus on getting better from here instead of berating yourself for dropping the good habits in the first place??? and your body never stops aging so you gotta keep taking care of it and sometimes you gotta take care of it extra in certain areas because of things that happened when you were younger and it's boring and sometimes hurts but it's so necessary???
i am yelling this at myself right now i am going through An Experience (trying to get into a routine of body maintenance again for my physical and mental health)
#rambling#and idk but like if this incentivises you to do some stretches too then that's great! remember to be kind to yourself#but im mostly directing this at myself because i was thinkng about these things while doing a 15 min stretch routine and i feel silly#but silly is okay as long as i keep going#edit: haha wow this post blew up. im gonna tag it with a few things to maybe help me find it later if necessary#sisyphus#body maintenance#popular post
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mfw my silly little bug fables oc who has an entire story planned out gets to do Nothing at all because I don’t have the time
#the key problem here is my lovely friend called indecision 🥰🥰#would it be better to A) write a fic for ao3 B) make a comic. or C) be a coward and do nothing#man it’s not even like I’m teeming with genius I just really wanna have a vessel for my numerous wasp kingdom headcanons lmao#oouhhh well….until I decide she can hang out in the best possible place…..my brain…..#kinda wanna do a comic cause they’re fun but they take so damn long!#first world problems. what to do with my little wasp.
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