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marsalaqueen · 1 year

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Ok, I have a sad theory about Alex Turner's relationships with his women and his music, that is, I hope, not 100% true. And I do want to share it with you!

The concept is that Alex takes only inspiration from his girlfriends for the new albums, write lyrics about them, but not really love them. And the only person whom he is in love with is Miles Kane.

Before we start I'd like to say that I don't wanna blame or offend anyone. I personally do not know any of the people described below and I can be wrong about them. I respect everything they do, and in fact I sympathize with absolutely every character. All the thoughts described below came to my mind only during a small investigation of some Alex's texts, which hooked me with their references even though sometimes they are not obvious.

Sooo, let's begin with Johanna Bennett. They were dating in 2005-2007, Alex was 19, for sure just a kid. The development of Arctic Monkeys has just begun, first album, first fame and fans confession. In fact, there is little information about them on the Internet, and the only thing I found was what he recorded with her "Fluorescent Adolescent". I can't say anything about specifically her influence on the first albums, because the press did not really catch their relationship. Then let's slowly move on to the favorite of most fans Alexa Chung.

Alexa was a real match. Their names, appearance and magnetic charisma spoke for themselves. They were dating from 2007 to 2011, Humbug and Suck It and See were released in this period (Favorite Worst Nightmare was recorded before her). And if in Humbug I can’t clearly trace any references (except perhaps Crying Lightning), then SIAS is one continuous declaration of love to Alexa. It has a lot more melancholic, romantic, incredibly touching songs - «She’s Thunderstorms», «Reckless Serenade», «Piledriver Waltz», «Love Is a Laserquest», «Suck It and See» and others. There is no doubt that the main source of inspiration was Alexa. And when Alex performed live She’s Thunderstorms after their split, the bitter pain was felt throughout the song. I mean, read some lyrics from SIAS:

Your love is like a studded leather headlock

Your kiss it could put creases in the rain

You're rarer than a can of dandelion and burdock

And those other girls are just postmix lemonade;

The type of kisses where teeth collide

When she laughs, the heavens hum a stun gun lullaby

Those twinkling vixens with the shining spiral eyes

Their hypnosis goes unnoticed when she's walking by

And I do believe that Chung was his last true love. Some sort of a special chemistry could be seen between them, a strong real feeling. Alexa was loving, easy and sincere, just like SIAS.

But after only a month in 2011 he started dating Arielle Vandenberg, a Hollywood actress. With her they had their best (commercially and judging by the love of the audience) album AM. IT was cheeky, luxurious, sexy - posh as an American dream, whose incarnation can be called Arielle. She was in R U Mine? and One For The Road clips (maybe even in some more), she is definitely his Arabella starting at least from the leopard coat that she often wore. In a word, she fit well into the concept of AM. They also looked cute with him, drinking together in bars and wearing damn cool Halloween costumes. And, more importantly, she got along with the rest of the members, as did Alexa, by the way!

Several months passes and Alex is in a relationships again - this time with a model Taylor Bagley, the most chaotic and crazy one (in a good way). After stunning success of AM Monkeys are taking a hiatus, and Alex starts having fun with Miles. We come to the intriguing part. During their relationship with Taylor, they are recording a new album with TLSP, which, in addition to the sound of vintage soul with strings, is also very romantic and poignant. What they did with Miles on stage is another story, but we'll get to that later. So, he and Taylor got paired tattoos with their names, he literally wrote at least "Sweet Dreams, TN" about her (Although being born in Oklahoma, she states in interviews that she considers herself a Nashville, Tennessee, native and she has a piercing in her nose), by the way, she also made a tattoo with the name of this song. Together with Miles they hang out at her house with a pool and dog; she is in "Bad Habits" clip, and in general they are real safely threesome. They are crazy, drunk and happily doing some odd things, like the 2nd TLSP album.

And finally we are coming to the most provocative part. Louise Verneuil. I will not say whether he cheated on Bagley with her or not, but the time between the breakup and the new relationship was negligible. Rumors say that Louise was almost in his dressing room backstage while he was still in a relationship with Taylor. So, so far, their relationship with the French singer is the longest he's ever had (2018-till now). Visually, I am insanely impressed with how they look together, they complement each other incredibly, if only because Louise is finally lower than him ahahaha. She is petite and flirtatious, infused with the spirit of the 70s and Jane Birkin. Look at her clips (Love Corail, Desert and etc.), and then at the Car....

Yes, he produced some videos for her, so maybe they are similar. But his style of Alain Delon, the image of the horny teacher of geography from the 70s, scarves at concerts and so on - all this gives off the atmosphere of Louise. For example, a There'd Better Be a Mirrorball clip, in which, by the way, there is Louise as well.

The only thing that confuses everyone is her bad relationship with fans (I saw a screenshot of the correspondence somewhere, where she rudely asked the girl to remove the photo with Alex from her stories), scandals with likes on posts about rape, photos of Alex once in a while a year, and the absence of Alex's sincere smile next to her, let's be honest. And one important notice - he stopped celebrating Halloween with Louise, which he apparently loved very much, as he always carefully approached the choice of costume (my favorite is Florence and the Machine with Arielle, it's fantastic)

Let's sum up a little. 1) Since 2005 Alex cannot be without a relationship for more than 4-5 months, which is not normal obviously. He seems to be afraid of being alone, thinking that he will not find inspiration for a new album, or, in principle, he has a fear of loneliness. 2) Vibes of all his albums are a reflection of his girls. Next to them he changes also. 3) Remember the evolution of his images, in addition to age and interests, the style of girls also influences him. With Alexa, it’s simple T-shirts and old jeans, while she is in plain dresses and shorts with knee socks; with Arielle he is in tight pants and leather jackets, and she is in extravagant coats and heels; with Taylor he is in colorful suits and flared pants, and she is in very short tops with pink hair; with Louise he is in corduroy jackets and white shirts, whilst she in vintage jeans and flowing blouses - boom, all matches! 4) Obviously he has a type of girls with a square face, blond hair and bangs. The only one who deviated much from this type was Taylor. 5) I have not seen him hugging, laughing and kissing someone the way Miles Kane does, next to whom he literally glows, not afraid to show himself, not afraid to be real, foolish, but really himself.

Perhaps happiness loves silence and Alex, as a not very public person, keeps all the feelings between him and his woman, but he is too open next to Miles, not afraid to show his feelings in public, which raises some doubts.

I would like to write a separate final post about Al and Miles, if it is necessary at all. Please let me know if any of this resonated with you, and if I can flesh out any of these points to you in more detail, I will do so with pleasure!

#alex turner #arctic monkeys #miles kane #alexa chung #louise verneuil #arielle vandenberg #taylor bagley #milex #tlsp2 #theory #relationship

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acacia-may · 1 month

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Hiya Acacia, I hope you’re doing well 🥰! Since you’re in a bit of a romantic mood, I thought I might ask for your thoughts on YuNeva and Zerilliam 👀? And for Platonic relationships how about Asta & Yuno and Fuegoleon & Nozel?

Sending you all the hugs and positive vibes in the world 🥰💜!

Aww Lyra! You're such a sweetheart! Thank you so much, dear! Sending you lots of love as well. 💕 I'd be thrilled to give you some ramblings. (Apologies in advance if they're too incoherent).

Zerilliam

I hope by now that you already know, but just in case you didn't, I absolutely adore this pairing! When I first started reading "Dandelion Wishes," I actually made my poor sister listen to me rant about how much I love this ship (and she hadn't even read the fic so she had no clue what I was talking about), and honestly I had more to say about them than most canon x canon Black Clover pairings, so needless to say, it is definitely canon in my mind.

William is such a sweetheart, and I can really imagine him as someone who has domestic dreams of finding love, settling down, and having a family so it warms my heart to see that he did get to have this (even if it ended in tragedy--which I will never get over. They deserved their happy ending! 😭 Even if I'll admit the angst is delicious, and their boy, Alistair, is just so precious to me).

Also, your backstory for how the two of them ended up together is just delightful. Honestly, "Dandelion Wishes" is one of my favorite fanfictions I've ever read in my life, and I have been so invested in it and in William and Zera's relationship from day one. They are so perfect for each other in my opinion, just absolutely made-for-each-other soulmates. I love how they share common interests but have a lot of balance in personality with Zera a little more headstrong and William a little more reserved. They really are in awe of each other's strengths too and have so much respect and admiration for their differences which I just adore.

Zera as a character is so vibrant and so real to me, as well. She just commands attention every time she appears, and every time she does pretty much anything, I can just vividly imagine William staring lovingly awestruck at her and zest for life with hearts in his eyes or floating around his head like in an old cartoon. (He's so in love! I'm going to cry!) Also, her quirks and the adorable way she names her plants is super endearing, and the fact that she is a florist only makes me love her more (but my family actually runs a flower shop (A/N: But I don't work there), so I think I'm very biased in this regard 😅).

I honestly don't get this intense about ships all that often, but I cannot describe to you in words how much I think about this pairing and how desperately I need them to kiss. And I mean desperately. To be perfectly honest with you, at this point, I am so invested in it that it's really hard for me to imagine William with anyone else...which concerns the more neutral, multi-shipper part of me, if I'm being honest, but this ship is just that good. Reading about them has made me laugh and cry and squeal just like (and in many cases more than) reading about any ship between canon characters, and I'm honestly just in awe of how compelling this ship and their story is. I really can't thank you enough for creating Zera, Zerilliam, and the masterpiece that is "Dandelion Wishes"! 💖

YuNeva

Aww they're cute. 😊 To be honest with you though (and I am very sorry to have to say this) in general ships with Yuno in them aren't really my cup of tea personally since I tend to see Yuno as someone who isn't all that interested in romance and (possibly) would just never really want that kind of relationship. That said, according to the Assorted Question Brigade in Vol. 31 he does have a “type” of person he likes...so who knows? Maybe someday he'll want to find love. If he did, I would definitely be supportive of that, and I'm not against the idea of shipping him. It's just not something I personally have ever given much thought to, and, for that reason, I feel pretty neutral towards Yuno ships in general and don't have many thoughts or opinions (Again, I'm sorry about that).

All of that said, if I was to imagine Yuno falling in love, YuNeva is a very sweet pairing, and they make me smile in your stories and posts about them. I really enjoyed them in COTF too! ^^ Going back to that Assorted Question Brigade I mentioned, Yuno himself described his "type" as "someone who's relaxing to be around," and that's something that really sticks out to me about his relationship with Neva. It's very comfortable and almost cozy. They just work so well together, and it feels effortless--like they just naturally gravitate towards each other and genuinely enjoy each other's company. I love that a lot, and I also love how their bond is built on mutual respect and admiration. They really support each other and the moments they can share their vulnerabilities are always very compelling to me. I also think Neva is just a great character on her own (especially her platonic bond with William. So wholesome!). I like her dynamic with Yuno a lot too and how they complement each other. I think I'm a little more invested in their friendship (because I'm weird like that), but I could definitely see them very happy together romantically and I definitely want good things for both of them, so I'd support them falling in love and think you’ve done a great job crafting their love story. 💕

Platonic Relationship Ramblings! Yay! Thank you so much for this, dear!

Asta & Yuno

Aww I adore them, and their brotherly bond. Their dynamic and rivalry which is built on a such a strong foundation of familial love and mutual respect was what initially hooked me in Black Clover, and it has been such a delight getting to watch their individual journeys and how they have supported each other through the series. I'm getting a little emotional just thinking about it, honestly. 🥹

One of my favorite things about them is just how wildly different they are as people. Asta has such a big personality, and Yuno is so reserved, but their differences are always respected and really help inspire each other. In that way, I love that their relationship is kind of a twist on the usual rivals dynamic because it isn't just Asta trying to live up to the (quite frankly very OP) Yuno but Yuno also views Asta as his rival as well because he has so much admiration for his passion, resilience, and determination. I was not expecting that when I first watched the anime and thought it was such a refreshing reveal. I love how Yuno's genuine admiration for Asta has been such a driving force for his character throughout the series.

Fuegoleon & Nozel

Yes! I love this dynamic! Nozel being tsundere about his friendship feelings is just so entertaining, and I love to see the trope used in a platonic way instead of just an explicitly romantic one. The love between friends is really important too and can also be difficult to express sometimes, so it was really great to see Nozel kind of struggle with that and struggle with how much Fuegoleon means to him and how much he admires and respects him even if he lacks the words to say it. And yes, it was kind of played for laughs sometimes, (and my sister and I made so many "tsundere besties" jokes about them while binging the anime), but even so, there is something really genuine and really wholesome about their friendship. Getting to see how Nozel reacted to Fuegoleon's injury and subsequent coma and how motivated he was by his respect and admiration for him was just really compelling, and I found the scene in the elf arc in which Nozel is thinking of their rivalry and how much Fuegoleon inspires him to be really moving. Definitely a solid BROTP!

#zerilliam is everything to me #i am so normal about them #yuneva is cute too #zera x william #zerilliam #thanks for the ask!#lyra 💜#asta and yuno friendship #fuegoleon and nozel friendship

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dandelionflowery · 29 days

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Intro post!

(if you're looking for the breast cancer awareness post it is here)

HII!!

My name on the internet is Dandelion, but you can call me whatever you like honestly. It's so hard to find a good name around here, the fae keep stealing them

I use any pronouns, online people default to they/them, IRL people default to she/her, you can use whatever you feel like!

I'm aroace 🧡💛🤍🩵💙 and my gender is up to interpretation lol

I'm 16 and I live in France but I have both French and American citizenship

I have both scoliosis (diagnosed, 45°) and probably dyslexia (not officially diagnosed but all the internet tests I did were screaming at me to go get an official diagnosis) and those two really hate each other who deCIDED SCOLISOIS SHOULD BE SPELLED THE WAY IT IS (if i spell it correctly be aware that either I copied it from somewhere, or i thought about it for WAY too long, or it was a monkeys on keyboards thing)

I created a blog just for reblogging shit (aptly named @dandelionflowery-reblogs) but even with that I can't promise to tag stuff correctly on either...

I'm not often super active on here, at least not regularly, mostly because I have way too many classes but sometimes I go absolutely insane and spend like an entire day on here (oops)

~~☆~~

I like:

- Harry Potter (Drarry, Deamus, Romione, Linny are my main ships but there's a decent chance you could get me to like a specific portrayal of just about any pairing lol) [also fuck jkr]

- The Marauders (WOLFSTARRR! Also Jily and aroace Peter and maybe Remadora. Same thing as before: open to other pairings [I know of and appreciate the ships with the girls but usually I'll lean towards the first ones mentioned actually I'll lean towards wolfstar with background Jily and aa battery Peter)

- Reading and books in general

- Fanfics, fanart!! (Both writing/drawing them and reading/simping for them)

Speaking of which, I have a side blog that's actually technically marauders themed! @mybrain-fanficedition

- Interactions on here!!

- there's probably some other stuff I like but I can't think of anything rn

~~☆~~

I don't like:

- Following from above, I said I was open to pretty much any pairing, ... I lied lol

I don't really like adult/child pairings (especially not snarry) but I am still open to at least trying it, but it is much much harder to convince me about that

- That said, irl adult/child is very bad and dni if you think it should be a thing in real life, fanfic is fiction do not attempt

- Also the usual list of if you're homophobic transphobic uh racist or just a generally mean person

~~☆~~

I like talking to people even if you don't know what to say just say hi!

Also I have other social media, come find me if you want!

@/flowerydandelion, @/dandelionfloweryart and @/wands.swords.and.books on Instagram!

On Ao3 I'm like 90% sure it's DandelionFlowery and uh probably similar usernames on Discord and Reddit [though I'm not often active on there]

Wait if I link my ao3 that means i need to actually post my fics lol

Leave comments if you read my fics, I love feedback!! (or just leave kudos, it makes me irrationally happy lol)

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dre6ming · 1 year

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The delicate beginning rush

Chapter VIII ~ I wished on a dandelion

Masterlist < all chapters are here>

Instagram photo dump masterlist

To be added to the tag list click HERE <but I’ve reached my limit of 50 tags per post so idk>

Pairing: Austin Butler x singer/actress fem reader

Warning: anxiety, cursing, age gap (10years), kissing, crying, fluff, angst …. hope that’s all

Plot: you try to get Austin out of your system by dating Joshua, but it feels so wrong to string him along. Eventually you and Austin give in and sparks fly

Word count: ~6900

Disclaimer: everything is fake :))

March 12th

My heart is racing and my hands are trembling. If 10 years ago you've told me, that I'd be here, walking the Oscar's red carpet as a nominee, I probably would've laughed right in your face. Regardless here I am now, and it feels like the air is too thick to breath in. "Hey, calm down, sweet dumpling." Timmy places his hand at the small of my back rubbing reassuring circles. I try to relax, shaking my shoulders slightly to release some of the tension in them. "You've got this." He whispers in my ear. I nod, but really I don't believe him, seems unreal, what's happening right now.

"And the Oscar, for best actress in a lead role, goes to" Scarlet Johansson makes a pause in her speech and the room goes quiet, I can almost hear my heart thudding against my rib cage. "(Y/n) (L/n), Reconstructing Amelia." There's this annoying buzzing in my ears, everything is blurry, but I can feel Timmy shake me awake, as I turn my head to him, smiling brightly. "You won!" He screams at me, wearing his most sincere smile, with tears at the bream of his eyes. "I did, oh fuck, I did!" I say hugging him and quickly, getting up to walk over on the stage and get my award.

My legs are shaking and I'm sweating, so I wipe my hands on my pants before taking the award from Chris Evans, after hugging both him and Scarlet. Standing in front of the microphone, with lights shining in my eyes and the crowd watching me, I get cold chills down my spine. "This is an extraordinary honor, that the academy, has granted me. No award has the power to truly define something so subjective as art, but it is fulfilling when you receive it nonetheless. I want to congratulate all the other nominees and everyone who was brave enough to make and put out a movie this year, regardless of it being on any list tonight or not. Acting is truly an escape for me, I find comfort in being able to tell the story of so many people with just one person. I want to thank my teachers, my fans, my team, my costars, for constant support and a great long partnership, it takes a village and this award is for every person in my life who supports me, loves me, teaches me, who guides me and who trusts me to have the privilege of doing what I love. Thank you!" I lift my award up in the air, letting out a few nervous laughs, before carefully stepping off the stage and right into Timmy's arms, where I start to cry profusely. "I'm so proud of you sweet dumpling" he says kissing my hair, squeezing me as tight as he can in his arms.

"Come on let's get your name on the thing!" He says, dragging me over to the station where they engrave your name on the award. "I can't believe this is real." I watch wide eyed as my name gets put on the gold statue. The happiness I feel right now is unmatched to anything I've felt before. It's a high so maddening I wish for it to never end. "Of course it did, you're so talented, bug" I laugh at his nick name for me, one he hasn't used in years. "Thank you." I whisper leaning into his shoulder, as Timmy puts one arm over my shoulder, caressing my arm. "For what, bug?" Giving him the side eye, we break into laughter, knowing full well his big ego shines bright. "For everything, big brother" his eyes glimmer with tears and he sniffs quickly, trying to hold them back.

After getting the award engraved, I had the stay for the rest of the ceremony. My movie ended up winning a few more categories, taking home 4 awards total. Then it's fast forward to the hotel room, to get changed for the after party and fixing up my makeup since I cried most of it off. "Ready to go?" Jeremiah asks, popping up the collar of his silk shirt. "Yeah" I giggle, smoothing the fabric of my dress. I chose a pink and orange number, decided it reminded me a lot of the outfit Taylor wore when she won, album of the year, at the Grammys, for the second time.

The party was nice, I guess I could say I had fun, but I'm not the party person. Crowded events make me nervous, I hate meeting new people and the whole time I had this bubble in my chest, ready to burst. It isn't until me and Timmy are out of the elevator and into my very quiet, very big, very empty apartment, that the bubble bursts.

My vision gets blurry and tears start flowing. "W-what's wrong?" Timothee asks worried, holding my shoulders. "Why am I not enough?" I say fully breaking down and falling in his arms. He understands what I mean. Why am I not enough for my parents? As my knees give up on me, Timmy catches me and carries me bridal style to my room, placing me on the bed and cuddling close to me. "Shh you are enough, bug, you are everything!" He says over and over again. I hear the words, but they mean nothing, he's not the one I want to hear saying those things. So I keep crying into his shoulder, clinging onto his shirt, shaking with every sob, while he keeps comforting me. I fall asleep in his arms and just like that the happiest day of my life, was also one of the saddest.

March 14th

Breathing in deeply, I look at myself in the mirror. The white wedding dress, fits me perfectly and my hair is neatly done. I look gorgeous. I really do. I'll be honest here, I was never that kind of girl who dreamed of her wedding, or pictured the perfect dress, but I do have to say, standing here all glammed and ready to walk down the aisle, I understand why some people love fantasizing about their wedding day.

This music video is going to look beautiful, for the past week or so, me and Joshua have been going back and forth with ideas, adding as many little Easter eggs as possible. The wedding scene is inspired by Bella's and Edward's wedding in Twilight. My prom dress is green, like the one in the movie "tick tick boom" and these are just a few small details.

After talking to Taylor and waking up that morning, texting Joshua was a bit of an impulse decision. He and I had a nice dinner and we laughed a lot, but it felt like hanging out with a best friend, nothing more. Still that didn't stop me from kissing him when he left. I close my eyes sighing, I know I'm a horrible person, because I keep telling myself I'll feel it, but no matter how many time I kiss him, all I think about is Austin and how good it would feel if it were him.

Austin...I groan at the thought of him, turning away from the mirror and scratching the inside of my palm, to stop myself from running my hands through my hair. I haven't talked to him since that night. He texted me a couple of times and I replied with short, empty texts. He called one time also, but I was with Joshua at the time and I rejected the call, so he never called again. Distancing myself from Austin, didn't help much with getting him out of my head, if anything it made it worse, cause I'm always wondering what he's doing, how he's doing. I must've stalked every fan page ever created for him, but all that did was remind me of why I should keep my distance. The comments about me and him, didn't die down since he always likes and comments on my instagram posts, giving fans every reason to believe something is going on between us.

"Ready?" Someone from production comes and asks me. "Yeah" I say, lifting the front of my dress up and walking after the girl.

March 17th

It's 5:20 am, too early for anything, but here I am in the back of my car as Matt drives to the airport for our flight to LA, which leaves in 2 and a half hours. "Ugh I hate mornings!" I groan taking a big sip of my coffee, making Matt laugh at me. "I know miss, I'm sorry!" Shaking my head, I take my phone out, opening instagram and posting a few stills from the music video, which comes out this Friday, same release date as my single. Of course my team tried to push for Joshua to wait and release it next week, but his team kept insisting a double release would create enough clout for the both of us. Before I get to finish the post my phone buzzes with a text from Austin?!

Austin B🕺:

Hey, are you in LA?

Me:

No, not yet, had something come up and had to push leaving for LA by two days.

Austin B🕺:

Oh, I see. Do you still want to come over?

Me:

Um yeah, sure, maybe Thursday?

Austin B🕺:

Perfect. Here's my address: location

Me:

Ok, what time should I be over?

Austin B🕺:

2pm? Making pizza from scratch takes time.

Me:

Ok, c u

Austin B🕺:

Got it!

After closing my texts with him, I try to get my heart back to it's normal rhythm, because just like every other time I spoke to him, my heart jumped out of my chest. I can't stop the stupid smile from spreading on my face. "Good news?" Matt asks me, causing me to blink rapidly trying to focus my eyes. "Um yeah, no, sure, I mean-" I stumble over my words. "Got it miss, I was just messing with you" he says grinning.

Looking out the window, it's nice to see New York come alive as 6 am rolls around. The city never really sleeps, but there's definitely a drop in the activity level at night. I look at the people running around, bumping into each other, living their normal lives, some are going to work, some are on their way to run an errand, some are on their way to some school they go to.

I sight turning my head, the thought of school brings this tremendous guilt in me. I loved school, I loved learning, at one point I almost considered my parents idea, of going to college, but my career was just picking up and I couldn't miss those opportunities. Now I could probably do it, but I feel like if I do, I'd loose momentum, I have an album on the way, I'm in the process of auditioning for more things, I couldn't handle college on top of all this. I've been in this weird spiral of thought for almost a week now, I haven't talked to my parents in so long, my mom stopped calling as well and now I have a little golden statue staring at me, telling about all the things I did to deserve being ignored by them. My therapist and Timmy keep telling me nothing in this world should make my parents act like this, but my head begs to differ.

Matt opens my door, taking me by surprise and I wipe a single tear form my cheek, before he notices. "Thank you!" I say smiling at him.

We walk to the gate and I keep my head down, trying to avoid attention. After going through security, I sit around waiting for Matt to come back with something to eat, I feel very faint and like everything is spinning, I haven't eaten in a day or two, I can't remember. It's exhausting to try and stop thinking about all the things that keep me up at night, also working hard and running around on very little sleep, is just not sustainable. "Here you are miss, eat this." I make a disgusted face at the tomato sandwich he brought over. Usually that would be my favorite thing to eat, but right now I'm at this point of starvation where everything looks nauseating. "I know but you have to" I take the sandwich in my hands and take little bites out of it, slowly getting myself to enjoy it. "Good, eat it all, I got you a chocolate bar as well, your favorite, caramel filling" Matt shows me the chocolate bar and I take a couple more bite out of the sandwich. It does actually feel good to have something in my stomach.

March 18th

"My goodness you look amazing" Brianna and Jeremiah say at the same time. "Orange is your color kid" Levis says, giving me a good look over. Today is the day I have the shoot for Variety magazine with Austin. I chose a custom made orange dress by Teuta Matoshi, the butterflies on the shoulders match the ones on my hair clips and my orange makeup definitely makes my eyes pop out. "Thank you guys"

"Ok so first you'll be taking the pictures and then the interview, both you and Austin already have the questions, so be calm" Levis says as one of the Verity assistants comes over to show me the way on set. Walking over to where they sat a piano and a guitar, my eyes wondere around and then I see him. Tall, blonde, in a black leather jacket and as he turns around I see he's wearing an orange top, to match my dress. My heart skips a beat when his eyes land on me and a big smile gets plastered on his face. "Hi there gorgeous!" Austin says coming over.

My heart starts running laps in my chest. "A-Austin, hello" I try to move over the fact that he called me gorgeous and the fact that I just stammered, because of it. He lets out a chuckle, looking over at someone calling his name. This is not going to be good if I keep acting like this around him, going over to his house tomorrow will be just awkward. "Ok so we want you over at the piano and Austin you can sit on the floor, hold the guitar." We take our positions, sitting down at the piano, looking at the keys, I run my fingers over them. Playing its like second nature, so I just do it, without even thinking that's not what I'm supposed to. I'm playing "dandelions", not singing any of the lyrics, but still, knowing this song is about the boy sitting on the ground next to me, makes me feel butterflies in my stomach, like I wish for him to figure out this song is about him. Finding some sense in my head, I quickly stop playing mouthing a small apology. I don't dare to look at Austin, I just pose as they tell me too.

"Ok, now, we'd like Austin at the piano and you (Y/n) sitting on top of it." Getting up, I kindly take the help of one of the production assistants, stepping on the small stool and sitting on the piano. I cross my legs and for a second I break my promise not to look at Austin, when the slit on my long dress falls open, revealing my thigh and he lets out a growl. My eyes meet his blue ones, his pupils are blown wide and there's a slight pink tint to his cheeks. Austin looks like a deer caught in the headlights, wide eyed, frozen on the spot. "Breathe" he whispers, making me feel the burn in my lungs. Looking away, I try to breathe, hoping it's not that obvious to everyone in the room that he just took my breath away.

The photographers snap a few shots of us and then someone says it's time for a break after which we'll get to filming the interview. I'm stuck on the piano waiting for someone to help me get down. Austin comes into my vision field smirking. "Need some help?" I don't trust my voice to sound normal, so I simply nod. "Ok" he places both hands on either side of me, holding them up, not touching me. "Can I?" Austin asks and I offer another small nod, but he shakes his head smirking "I need you to say it, darling" there it is, that pet name again, I didn't even realize how much I've missed it in the time I tried to avoid Austin.

"Yes, please" I let out batting my lashes at him, gasping when I feel his flaming palms on my waist. I brace myself on his shoulders, as he lifts me up, placing me on the ground. Nothing too bad, except there's a moment there when he holds me up, just for a second longer and our faces are inches apart, Austin's breath brushing my cheek. "Thanks" I cringe at how breathless that sounded and I move past him.

"Is everything ok? You've been avoiding me." Austin asks, walking by my side. Fuck he has me figured out. "Yeah, no, I've been busy" fiddling with the skirt of my dress, I still avoid meeting his face. "Lies" Austin states and then using one long finger he lifts my chin up, forcing our eyes to meet again. "I missed talking to you" I gasp, looking around, nobody seems to be paying any mind to us. "Why do you keep avoiding me? Did I do something?" He looks genuinely concerned that he might have done something to make me ignore him. Something in the back of my brain screams at me that I should tell him the truth, that I have a huge crush on him and I'm stringing along another boy in the hopes of forgetting him.

"No, Austin, you didn't, I've just been having a hard time, 'm not in the best place right now." Not a lie, only not the truth I wanted to say. "What's wrong?" I sigh, taking a step back and shaking my head. I'm not willing to discuss this with him, now or maybe ever. "Ok people let's go, everyone back to your spots, it's late already." Thanking god for this very welcomed interruption, I turn and move over to my chair.

The interview goes by fast, even though we talked for almost two hours. At one point I was looking into Austin's eyes and it felt like it was just the two of us, two close friends catching up. We got a tad carried away, asking questions that weren't scripted, but the director loved it, so it wasn't that big of a deal. Now I'm in hair and makeup getting everything taken off, fidgeting in my chair, ready to go sleep. A knock on the door, makes both me and the girl taking care of taking off my glam, look in it's direction. There, leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed over his chest, is Austin smiling. Walking to sit into the empty chair next to me. "So do you like pineapple on pizza or not?" He squints hie eyes at me, waiting for my answer, making me snort. "I like pineapple on pizza"

"Blasphemy" he says scrunching up his nose, making a disgusted face. "Oh come on!" I laugh at his clear disapproval. "It tastes good." I try to reason with him but he doesn't seem to have it, as he starts waving his hands around to make me stop talking. "What song were you playing earlier? I don't think I recognized it." His question takes me by surprise and I feel the heat rising into my cheeks, painting them a scarlet shade. Austin lifts his brows up at me, as I have not answered his question. What should I do?

I slide my fingers over my lips, mimicking the action of zipping them shut, which makes Austin, throw his head back laughing. "Fine don't tell me, but just so you know it sounds beautiful, does it have lyrics yet?" I simply shrug my shoulders smirking at him. "I'm done here!" The girl attending to my make up says and I thank her.

As I jump out of my chair, I almost fall down, stumbling over my own feet, but Austin is quick to catch me. "Careful there!" He warns, before taking his hands off of me and putting them into the pockets of his jeans. "Thanks." I mumble, taking my bag and walking out of the room, with him hot on my heels. "Ready to go miss?" Matt asks, getting up from his chair. "Yes, Matt, I'm ready" I glance at Austin and smile at him, offering a little wave, but he surprises me by bringing me in for a hug. I melt into his arms, feeling the warmth of his body against mine, inhaling his scent. I'm getting drunk on the feeling of being cocooned by him. "I'll see you tomorrow, don't be late." Austin whispers, causing shivers to run down my spine.

When we pull apart I try to sit up straight, fixing my bag on my shoulder and pushing some hair behind my ears. "I won't" is all I say, before turning on my hills and walking fast in the direction of the parking lot, jumping into the car as soon as I can. In the small enclosed space, away from him, my thoughts clear up and I decide I should text Joshua, tell him how today went, but I'll avoid any of my interaction with Austin. We haven't put a label on what me and Joshua are, but feels like for him we're already dating, maybe we are and I'm just slow.

Me:

Wyd? 2day was grate 4 me, the interview, came out amazing.

🎶Joshua🎶:

Glad 2 hear. I'm good, had a late morning and then went in the studio 4 a few hours.

Me:

Anything I can hear?

🎶Joshua🎶:

Not yet, it's mostly scraps.

Me:

I'm sure it's amazing.

🎶Joshua🎶:

Doing anything exciting while in LA?

Me:

Not really, no. I'll be back in a week, I have to go for an audition in person.

🎶Joshua🎶:

I miss you💟

Me:

Me 2 💟

I put my phone in my bag and lean forward. "Matt can I get my own car? I want to go around on my own a bit." I say, hoping he won't question me on it. "Sure miss, if you want you can have this one, no need to rent another one." I nod, sitting back in my seat, counting my fingers, something I do to calm myself down. When Matt parks the car, I don't wait for him to come around and open the door for me, walking out and straight into the elevator. "Here miss, for later." He hands me the car keys and I thank him.

The hotel room looks nice, but I miss home, I miss my cats. Throwing myself on the bed, I snuggle under the thick covers, falling asleep quickly. When I wake up a few hours later I'm confused by the dark room, but when I look at my phone it makes sense, it's 10pm. Groaning annoyed I throw my hands and feet around, trashing the bed. I know I won't be able to fall asleep anymore, so the next best thing that comes to mind is to go out. Grabbing my jacket and putting it on, I pull out the keys that were still in the pocket of it, spinning them on my finger.

All my excitement dies down when I get in the drivers seat and see the car is an automatic, I've never driven one before. "Ugh" I slam my head against the steering wheel, fighting back tears. "Ok I can do this." I try to keep my cool, quickly googling instructions on driving an automatic. Thank god for google, in an hour I manage to get an idea of what I'm supposed to do, so I turn the car on and slowly drive away.

LA definitely looks beautiful at night, but it's still too crowded for me and I know there's no place where I could go and not get photographed. I listen to my GPS and make a right turn at the next intersection, spotting the store I need. Grinning I park in a spot far away for the entrance. I promised Austin, I'd teach him how to crochet, so I'll keep my word.

Walking around I pick a few colors of yarn and a few crochet hooks, you really don't need much for this hobby. After paying for my things, I smile at the nice cashier and make my way back to my car. Deciding next I could drive to McDonald's and maybe get something to eat, it's almost midnight, but I could use a bite to eat. The drive through is empty, so I get my order pretty quick and as I'm eating in the car, it occurs to me that this is a great time to film one of my video journals for my therapist. Putting my phone on the dash I start recording myself.

"I feel empty?! I think" I sigh, eating some more of my chicken nuggets. "I've been feeling numb, maybe that's more correct. Like I have empathy inside, but I don't really care." And that's when it hits me, this could be a song, not just one of my video diaries I send to my therapist. "Oh my, this, wait a minute." Searching desperately in my bag, I fish out a pen, then putting the car in drive I go back to the window. "Hi, hello, can I please have some more tissues?" I ask smiling, the girl at the register clearly flustered. "Yes, oh my god, you're (Y/n), right? I'm such a big fan." It warms my heart to hear this, I love my fans and I love when they have the courage to talk to me. "Yes, would you like an autograph? I'm not really feeling that picture ready right now." The girl nods eagerly, handing me a tissue to sing. "Who should I make this to?" I ask "Amber" nodding I sign my name and add a cute message for her. "Thank you" she says, offering me a huge stack of tissues. "No, please, thank you."

Back in the parking lot I start scribbling away, words flowing through my pen. Hours later, I think I have something I'm happy with, so I put my phone back on the dash and start recording. "Hi Jack, yeah, so it's" I look at the time and widen my eyes, it's 4am, I've been here for four hours. "Anyway, 4am, god, well, I just got this idea, I named it, numb little bug" I clear my throat and start singing. "I don't feel a single thing, have the pills done too much, haven't caught up with my friends in weeks and now, we're out of touch."

Ok so the part with the pills is a lie, I don't actually have any prescribed medication, but it sounded good, so we'll just go with it.

"I've been driving in LA and the world just feels to big" I keep singing and when I'm done, pleased with my work, I fold all the tissues neatly and put them in my purse, driving to my hotel. Maybe I'll catch some sleep before I go meet up with Austin.

After a long shower, I get under the covers, but I don't feel sleepy, so I take my phone and make sure to text the recording to Jack, then I open instagram. The first thing I see are pictures of me making out with Joshua. This is getting out of hand. Sitting my phone down, I stare at the ceiling, praying for sleep to find me, which thankfully it eventually does. Next time I wake up is 10am and I call Jack on face time to talk to him about the new song I send.

"So I loved it, I think we can make it sound real pop, you know, and dancy" I nod and pick up my ukulele, playin softly. "Like this?" I ask, as I keep playing and he goes over to the keyboard, playing a mixture of high and low notes. "I love it" I say and start singing along to the music. We keep at it for the next two hours and then I have to get up and get ready for my day with Austin.

A pair of mom jeans and a tank top with a cardigan will have to do it for now, it's not like it's a date or anything. For my hair I decide to braid it and add some cute hair clips to it. Then I'm out the door, already worried I'll be late.

As I dive humming along to the radio, I look in my rearview mirror and notice a car driving very close behind me, then I notice the guy on the right seat, holding up a camera. My anxiety picks up and I ask Siri to call Austin on speaker. "Hey there!" His sweet voice comes through the phone. "Austin I'm being followed, I'm, I-" I'm panicking is what I'm doing. "Ok are you alone? Where's your security?" Austin tries to keep calm, but I can hear, the change in his voice. "Yes, im alone, I'm in the car." I hear him sigh and then there's just silence. "Austin?" I ask hoping he didn't just end the call.

"I'm here, stay calm, tell me where you are" I breathe through my nose, holding back hot tears, trying to focus my eyes on the road. "I'm on main with 34th street." I sob, tightening my hands around the wheel and looking back to see the car still close behind me. Paparazzi can sometimes be too intrusive, dangerous even. "Ok there should be a sign in a couple of yards, pointing to the highway."

"The highway? Austin I've never driven on the highway and I'm driving an automatic, which I drove for the first time just a few hours ago." My voice picks up in volume and I hear a weird ringing in my ears. I'm having a full on panic attack. "Shhh you'll be fine, come on, do you see the sign?" I try to focus, looking for the sign and spotting it, right in front. I take a sharp left and then in just a few minutes I find myself on the highway. "I'm on the highway, now what?"

"Are they still after you?" Austin asks. "Yes" I say after checking. "Ok, take the exit on 56th boulevard and then the first right." I push the gas, gaining some distance between me and the car, then follow Austin's instructions. "Ok, done." I look back and I can't see them anymore. "I think I lost them" Austin let's out a breath and so do I. "Ok I'll stay with you, you're not far from my place now." Swallowing hard I set my GPS back up and follow it, with Austin still on the phone. "I think I see you're gate." I say

"Ok I'm opening it now." I look one more time again making sure I'm still free of those guys from earlier, then drive through the gate. After I stop the car, I just sit there, still. I can't move, too high on adrenaline. When my door opens, I let out a scream and put my hands up to protect myself. "Hey, hey, it's ok, (y/n) it's me, Austin" he takes me in his arms and pulls me out of the car, holding me close to his chest. "You're safe" he says, petting my back slowly. I burry my face in his chest, taking in his musky scent. "I was so scared." I say, letting my tears fall, soaking into his black shirt that he has on.

"I know, my darling, I know, come on." Austin bends down and placing both hands behind my thighs, he lifts me up. I hang onto him like a monkey, with my arms around his neck and my legs locked behind him. Being a gentleman he supports me up, by my back. I love how good this feels I don't even dare to let my brain process that this is wrong. "Wait. Take the bag, from the car." Austin walks around, opening the passenger seat door and taking my bag as well as the bag holding the crochet supplies. He carries me around like I weight, nothing, walking through his open front door and closing it behind himself.

Austin sits down on the couch with me, tightly wrapped around him, so now I'm straddling his lap, with my head in the crook of his neck. His big palms caress up and down my back, soothing me. I don't want this to ever stop. "I'm sorry you had to go through that." Austin says, speaking low, as if he's afraid he'll scare me, if his voice got too loud. I pull away a bit, to be able to look at him and he takes my face in his hands, wiping my cheeks, with the pads of his thumbs. His blue eyes so deep, I could get lost in them forever. One of his hands, moves some loose pieces of my hair away and then as his eyes fall on my neck, anger flashes on his face. I furrow my brows confused. "He's here with you, in LA?" I search his face, for a clue about what the hell he means.

Austin blows air through his nostrils and then snaps his eyes away from my neck and back into my eyes, holding eye contact. "What?" "Is Joshua here with you?" Austin asks only adding fuel to my growing confusion. Touching my neck on the spot where Austin's eyes were fixed, I remember the purple bruise Joshua left there. Is he angry at that? And if he is, why is that? "N-no" my voice in barely a whisper and I try not to cry again.

Hearing my answer, Austin's eyes soften again, then one of his hands comes to sit on top of mine on my neck. I feel dizzy, the breath getting caught in my lungs. I look at him flushed, shallow breaths falling from my lips and onto his. When my lips brush over his, I realize we've been slowly getting closer and closer. "What are you doing?" I ask, out of breath, forcing myself to listen to that small part of my brain, that screams at me this is wrong. "Tell me to stop, please!" Austin begs me, his plush, soft lips, slowly touching mine as he speaks. I wish to make myself able to say 'stop' , but I can't. I want this too much, it feels so safe, familiar and warm. Like every worry in the world has just vanished. For a second I wonder if this is just a highly realistic dream again.

"(Y/n)" Austin says out of breath, like his making an effort to keep calm. My name sounds like burning embers, coming out of his mouth and I tremble. "Austin" I say, like I craved saying it for so long. "Can I kiss you?" Austin asks and every fiber of me saying I should stop right now and leave, loses to the stronger part of me, that has been wondering how his lips would feel against mine. "Please !" I plead and then he brings my face closer, finally smashing his lips against mine. It's hungry, hurried, raw, but also tender and sweet. Our lips move in perfect sink, nothing has ever felt so wrong but so good. Butterflies flap their wings around in my belly, my head flying on another planet. Starting to feel more and more comfortable, I lace my fingers in his hair, pulling at the roots, making Austin groan in my mouth. His tongue, brushes against my lower lip and I open my mouth for him, letting him take full control.

Austin's hands move over to my waist, holding me flush against his chest. He tastes so good, like mint and burnt sugar. I could stay like this an eternity, in his lap, with his tongue exploring my mouth. Our hearts beat in sink, our moves fluid. When we break apart, we stay with our foreheads glued together, breathing heavy. "I should know better, but I don't, please don't hate me!" Austin says, squeezing my waist. "I should know better as well, but I don't" I say, but Austin shakes his head, pulling me back so he can look me in the eyes. "You're 19, I'm 29, I should be the one knowing better" What he just said, leaves me stuck, he's so right, but I don't know if the fact that he knows, this thing between us shouldn't be happening, changes anything. "I wanted to do that for a while now." I say, making him smile brightly. "You did?" He asks with a strange glimmer in his eyes.

Biting my lip, I nod, scratching his scalp, causing him to close his eyes and throw his head back. I stare at his Adam's apple and leaning forward I kiss it, feeling the vibration of his growl against my lips. I pepper kisses up his neck, then his chin, then the corner of his mouth and finally his lips. We both sigh into the kiss. One of his hands comes up to hold the back of my head. "I wished upon a dandelion for you" I say against his lips and he pulls back to look at me. "Really? Well seems like that wish came true."

"Do you want to hear the song?" I ask smiling down at him. Austin nods and I get off of his lap. "May I?" I ask pointing to the white piano in his living room. "Yes, please!" Austin responds. Sitting down at the piano, I look back at him on the couch and pat the spot next to me. He jumps over the back of the couch and comes to sit next to me, kissing the top of my head. "Ok, this is 'Dandelions'" I start playing, looking at him connect the dots in his brain, a huge smile stretching on his lips as he figures out it's the song from yesterday. "Maybe it's the way you say my name, maybe it's the way you play your game, but it's so good, I've never known anybody like you. But it's so good I've never dreamed of nobody like you and I've heard of a love that comes once in a lifetime and I'm pretty sure that you are that love of mine. I'm in the field of dandelions wishing on everyone that you would be mine."

I sing with all my heart and I feel Austin watch me close. Finishing the song, Austin quickly grabs my face and kisses me. It's open mouthed and warm, my emotions furling inside me, my heart running laps in my chest. "I loved it, it's beautiful. Did you really write it for me?" Austin asks surprised. "Yes, I did. Austin I like you, I do"

"I like you too." He says happily, brushing his nose against mine. "Are you sure this is what you want?" Austin asks, looking at me, brushing some strands of loose hair out of my face. "Yes, but we need to move slow. I still have my reservations about this." I say. "Of course, you set the pace, I promise." I smile at Austin and hug him. "Do you still want to make pizza?" Austin asks. I giggle excited and get up, rolling up the sleeves of my cardigan. "Hell yeah" I say. Austin laughs, getting up from the piano bench and showing me the way to his kitchen.

"Here little chef" he says, putting an apron over my head, helping me tie it at the back. Being short, I have to fold it a bit on itself at the waist but it's fine. "I bought the set specially for today, I don't usually care for my clothes getting dirty." Austin says as he turns around and I tie his apron, like he did for me. "I should've asked if they come in sizes, sorry"

"Eh it's fine, the more of my clothes it covers, the better, I'm a messy cook" I say grinning.

Austin claps his hands. "Ready to learn how to make pizza?" He asks rubbing his palms together. "Yes sir, teach away" he bites his bottom lip, shaking his head. "You're gonna be the death of me, my darling"

"Say it again" I request, before I can stop the words coming out of my mouth. Austin bends down, bringing his mouth to my ear, making the hair on my arms stand up. "My darling" he says, in a low voice. "Now let's make some pizza, my sweet darling" he grins at me standing up straight and I roll my eyes at him, pushing against his chest playfully.

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meimi-haneoka · 5 months

Note

Hiya~ Dimensional-bitch is my side blog, and I guess I cannot send mail from it!

Anyhow, I saw your reblog and wanted to send you a note personally because...damn. I get it. I've been seeing the same...stuff around. And my extraocular muscles have been getting an EXCELLENT work-out from all the eye rolling.

So many temper tantrums. Half of them whining that CLAMP worked on something other than their preferred manga for a few years, half of them mad about...whatever exacting expectation they had for Clear Card that wasn't met.

And honestly? THESE ARE THE SAME TANTRUMS MY 3 YEAR OLD HAS.

If I dare to do something other than take her to the park we went to yesterday? Instant fit! Worst Mommy EVER!

If she gets the milk she wants in a blue cup instead of pink? DAY RUINED. She can't enjoy milk again, EVER.

I am old enough now to realize that every time a CLAMP manga ends we are going to get this same round of preschooler "BUT IT ISN'T WHAT I WANTED!" foot-stomping. And it's...fine. Whatever. But even though I expect it now I am still. so. tired. And salty. I could salt the seven seas.

So THANK YOU for taking the time to look at and put together something that really gets into what Clear Card IS and DOES. (I am looking through your blog now and I am sad I didn't find it sooner - you've got lots of great stuff here! Especially about Kaito - I do NOT understand the fandom hate??? He's obviously a tortured but ultimately good soul????) There are so many good (and fun! - I've been reading this with my 8-year-old son and he is totally into the magic of it all, even if some of the symbolism flies over his head for now) things about it that get buried under the tantrums. And I am so happy to see them discussed like this!

Best wishes! <3

WAAAAAIT WAIT I HAVE TO REPLY TO THIS ONE BEFORE ANYTHING ELSE BECAUSE I feel like I'm about to cry...

You know the feeling when.....you feel *seen*? You feel understood? This is what I felt when I received your ask, Dandelion! (Is it ok if I use this name?) Omg yes. a thousand times yes....you summarized pretty well what I've seen and what I think about this whole situation too. (BTW I'm a mom too and I know what you mean! 😂)

I am old enough now to realize that every time a CLAMP manga ends we are going to get this same round of preschooler "BUT IT ISN'T WHAT I WANTED!" foot-stomping.

Ever since I got on the internet, I was able only to witness the endings in "real time" of Tsubasa, Holic and Kobato, and while I don't remember much for Kobato (probably because it's so underrated and no one was reading it), I DO remember especially the uncomfortable "atmosphere" in the fandom that accompanied the last chapters of Tsubasa's serialization. I remember all the negativity, and all the exact same complaints of today with Clear Card, "it's too complex!" "this has dragged too long please END IT". It was so overwhelming that I got dragged into it too. I COMPLETELY understand what you mean. I didn't expect I'd see it again with Clear Card, but hey people can always surprise you for the worst, isn't it? So I had decided, towards the end of Clear Card, that I wouldn't let ANYONE make me go through what I went through when Tsubasa ended, and I've set limits and lines to not be crossed with everyone, even close friends. I wanted to enjoy this story in peace to be able to write about what I TRULY feel.

I am SO GLAD that you're checking the rest of my blog and that you find my posts interesting. Most of the time, especially when I talk about Kaito and Akiho in the desperate attempt to make people understand those characters a bit better, it's a bit like shouting in the wind.....but I won't stop doing it. I love those characters, and I thank CLAMP everyday for creating them, they brought so much depth and enriched CCS in a special way.

Thank you so much for this ask!! 🙏❤️

#reply #I'm so grateful #you really get it #I'm so glad I found someone else who appreciates and can see Kaito for who he really is?

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augustinewrites · 6 months

Note

augustine!! i am dropping by to give some good vibes & good weather for the weekend!! 🥹🌤️ & am also curious!! what song reminds you of any of your blorbos? 🥺 (u can choose… tho i know… ur brain has a bank of songs in there for EVERYONE 😭)

sel!! thank you but it is hella gross weather where i am rn 🥹 also you KNOW my brain runs a mile a minute when it comes to my blorbos so this is very hard…

*clears throat, cracks knuckles*

!! lyrics mentioned are the ones that stood out to me heh

the fushigojos (whose official playlist is pending!) || precious love by james morrison

// i was so lost, didn't know what to do with myself // i was my own worst enemy, i was lost and know needed help // i say thank you for pulling me through, i'm a lucky man // this is precious love, and it's teachin me everything i need to know

it is just…so wholesome and fits gojo’s perspective perfectly

gojo satoru || take a chance with me by NIKI

// heart intangible, slips away faster than dandelion fluff in the sunlight // as much and hard as he tries to hide, i can see right through // he says my name like i'd fade away somehow if he's too loud // why can't you for once, disregard the world and run to what you know is real

just...fits him SO perfectly tbh. i think he needs someone who can read him well and is willing to take the first step for him, you know?

nanami kento || butterflies (stripped version) by MAX & ali gatie

// when we're layin still but you make my heart race // i won't stop getting butterflies, i get em every time i look into your eyes // seen that dress on you before, but every time i do i swear it only makes me love you more // you won't stop runnin through my mind for the rest of both our lives

SO soft and sweet. just the simple things that you'll always love about your person. no explanation needed.

marius von hagen || sparks fly by taylor swift

// you're the kind of reckless that should send me running // my mind forgets to remind me you're a bad idea // i'm on my guard for the rest of the world but with you, i know it's no good // cause i see sparks fly whenever you smile

fits him so well tbh. that kind of love thats fun and exciting and unexpected but that you know will be so so great

wriothesley || heaven by bryan adams

// love is all that i need, and i found it here in your arms // once in your life you find someone who will turn your world around // now our dreams are coming true, through the good times and the bad

every rock song (especially by bryan adams and bon jovi) has reminded me of rio the slay lately...just picture him, twirling the handcuff on his finger singing wanted dead or alive living his outlaw cowboy fantasy while doing his rounds

iwaizumi hajime || 3:15 by bazzi

// lying next to you, i got a flight in the morning. got me questioning what i think is important // life out in cali has been great i'm committed, you're the only thing that makes me wish things were different // it's a quarter after three, saying everything we mean

LDR IWAIZUMIIIIIII MY BELOVED. i know i don't talk about him as often as i should but this will always be my favourite iwa song

#[💌—inbox]#[—sel ☁️]#keeping up with the fushigojos

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waltzofphoenix · 17 days

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2. How did you get into this franchise/fandom?, 17. Are there any ships you can’t stand, why?, 20. If you could sum up your character with one sentence, what would it be? 21. Which song do you feel describes your character the most and why? (Zhongli, Albedo, Kaeya, Diluc, Venti? <3~)

canon questionnaire ✩ accepting!

2. How did you get into this franchise/fandom?

; [ WELL, YOU KNOW... a friend of mine got into it first, and I had to find out what all the fuss was about!

But yeah, the more you talked about it the more I wanted to play it, myself. It sounded like the plot was my kind of story, for starters, and you KNEW which characters I would be drawn to, haha! ]

17. Are there any ships you can’t stand? Why?

; [ There's a few, yeah. Mostly, it's just that I dislike the dynamics the characters have together... or I dislike the dynamics that the FANS have decided the characters have together, regardless of canon.

(The latter is even true for ships I enjoy, like Kaeya + Albedo. It's so jarring to see people write one or both of them ALL WRONG.)

I'd rather not name ship names, though, because I don't want a ship critical post to somehow end up in ship tags, LOL. ]

20. If you could sum up your character with one sentence, what would it be?

˖°✩ — Diluc: "He needs to learn to trust his heart again."

✧˖° — Kaeya: "No matter where it came from, a dandelion will bloom where it grows."

✤˖° — Albedo: "Sometimes, the question is the answer."

◇°˖ — Zhongli: "Even stone can change."

○࿐ — Venti: "The wind can be a gentle breeze... or an angry storm."

21. Which song do you feel describes your character the most and why?

This got a bit long, WHOOPS! There's also some slight ship bias in some of these songs because... it's hard to find songs that aren't about romance and I DO have feelings about a few ships. SO!

Disclaimers aside, please enjoy the playlist~

Luck by American Authors — this song makes me think of Diluc and Kaeya's relationship, since there's verses that fit both of them, but if I had to pick ONE, it's more of a Diluc song:

Gonna pick myself up, so I don't let this ember grow Even if I mess up, I won't let this ever go It's hard to stay, it's hard to stay 'Cause some birds aren't meant to be caged

Lost Boy by Troye Sivan — it's not perfect, but it just gives me such strong Kaeya vibes? It makes me think of his way of dodging around his own feelings, and how he's just... not ready to be honest with the whole world about himself yet:

I say I wanna settle down Build your hopes up like a tower I'm giving you the run around I'm just a lost boy Not ready to be found

What Was I Made For? by Billie Eilish — this one just fits Albedo so well, aaah!? It's about a doll that's seeking her purpose, that wants to know what it's like to be real and have all the feelings:

'Cause I, I I don't know how to feel But I wanna try I don't know how to feel But someday, I might Someday, I might

Memories by Maroon 5 — This is such a Zhongli song. "Osmanthus wine tastes the same as I remember… But where are those who share the memory...?" I DO associate it with his relationship with Guizhong specifically, but it could fit anyone he cares about:

Toast to the ones here today Toast to the ones that we lost on the way 'Cause the drinks bring back all the memories And the memories bring back, memories bring back you

Humbug Mountain Song by Fruit Bats — I feel like this could be a song about how Venti... became Venti, if that makes sense? SO it would also be a song about the Nameless Bard:

The next thing I knew the stars were eyes up in the night And the ocean breathing heavy like a beast I held you, but I don't know if I was strong enough to say How the way it felt messed up my mind

BONUS ROUND:

Let it Out by Miho Fukuhara — this is such a good song for Diluc and Lia's relationship! They want to turn their pain and tears into stars, they don't need to "pretend to be strong" around each other, the lines about the light of a new day and gentle winds... AAAH?!

Dandelions by Ruth B. — do I even need to explain why I think this is a Venti song? It is a love song, though, and while I don't actually ship Venti with anyone except maybe the Nameless Bard... it could still be a song about Venti, right? LOL!

#✧ [ a message from afar ] ask #✩ [ the dawn knight ] diluc headcanon #✧ [ a glacial waltz ] kaeya headcanon #✩ [ flash of genius ] albedo headcanon #✩ [ resonant waves ] zhongli headcanon #✩ [ skyward sonnet ] venti headcanon

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irrlicht-ghostfront · 17 days

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What is RADOVID??? Sounds real cool!

RADOVID is my very thought-through, aptly named WIP for another Witcher fic that, due to lack of interest (yes I am that vain) lies somewhat iced (I only have two more scenes to write but I can't be bothered to) that can actually be found HERE if you want to.

It's about Radskier, the ship between Jaskier and Radovid and a very firm AU :) It does feature Mpreg, and I know that's not everybody's cup of tea (reading it a bit again, I don't even know if it's my cup of tea.) It has prostitute Jaskier and freshly-crowned king Radovid - it was meant to be a whole ass story of sorts (I even made notes for the main story) as this aptly named RADOVID came after the initial idea and is technically a sidequel. But as I said, I'm vain and because nobody cared but me I decided to ice it for now :) Here's an excerpt from the already-finshed last chapter:

“I love you. I love you more than anything, anything in this world. Yes, more than my children, and you know how much I love them, but you, oh you, I love you so much more. I want to spend my life with you, however, in whatever capacity I am able to. It doesn’t matter what that means, not for me. I’d give up my throne, my kingdom, everything, for you, if you’d ask me to. But you wouldn’t, you won’t, because you’re good, you care, you are so, so wonderful and my heart weeps every time I see you because I love you so, so much. I need you; I want you in a way I didn’t even know was possible. My heart is yours, it will always be and, and I’m not asking you to stay, I’m not asking anything, but I need you to know, you have to know, because I fear you won’t, you don’t, even though I’m so obvious, it’s so plain to see, I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Dandelion’s eyes were panicked, looking, flitting around the room, but always landing back onto Radovid. Something’s got him afraid, he knew, but he wasn’t sure what it was, but oh, if he did, if he did, he’d get rid of it, he’d march an army onto it. But this was a matter far more delicate, he was afraid, and no army could come to their aid. Gently, Radovid moved forward and pressed a gentle kiss on the man’s lips. He wasn’t pushed away; there was no recoil, just a soft, shuddering breath.

Releasing him, Dandelion took a faltering step backwards.

“I’ll come back,” he said with a quivering voice, and left through the door.

#the witcher #jaskier #radovid #radskier #tag game #asks

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lultimagoccia · 3 months

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A small, folded "form" was left in-between the pages of the most recent manga that Pizzano liberated from Dandie's apartment.

Your name: Dandelion Micia I guess??

Romantic or platonic?: UHHH--

A night in or dinner out or an activity?: I'm all for nights in but we could also maybe go to the arcade for gaming and karaoke or something?

Ice cream or chocolate covered strawberries?: Ice cream. Chocolate strawberries are a lot of work. :'3

What's your perfect date?: I guess I never really think about it, but I'm easy to please. I like listening to music and staying in, cooking or getting takeout and just spending time together. (Weed is optional.)

Would you cook for me?: I can cook for you sure! :) If you like comfort food I make a chicken risotto that fucks severely.

Would you let me cook for you?: Can you cook? I wouldn't mind if you wanted to.

Can we make-out?: LMAO I meannn....>///> Ye.

Make out in private or in public?: Private please. Public is too public.

Do you like to cuddle?: Yeah. ;u;

Blankets or no blankets for cuddling?: Blankets are good but optional!

Couch or bed?: Bed has better cuddling real estate and like I can set up my laptop and we can watch movies!

What are at least 3 hobbies of yours?: My music! My drawing! And taking care of little plants!

Tell me something about you no else knows: I've been on a motorcycle once in my life! But it was when I was little and my dad said "Dani don't you get on that bike because the muffler is HOT" and I didn't listen and did it anyway because I am DISRESPECTFUL. (My fur never totally grew back along the inside of my leg cuz I got second degree burns and I hid it from my parents for a week hahaaaa-- ಥ‿ಥ)

Why do you want to be my valentine?: Idk man you're probably gonna be out partying but. If you get bored, we could hang out.

What makes you a good Valentine?: I don't really know. I guess because I like to make people feel valued? Doesn't have to be a romantic thing. I just think everyone should feel a little loved on Valentine's day.

rp muse valentine’s application. [ x ]

dandie do you want him to show up at your apartment at 3 in the morning again because this is how you get him to show up at your apartment at 3 in the morning again. except like he'll bring some chocolate edibles or somethin' romantic like that.

#;ask #;meme response #;v: sugary spire #manebloom #weed cw

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violettedove · 3 months

Text

Remake of her character appearance, well, not really but yeah.

I will probably update and rewrite a few things.

Dandelions crown is a black moon themed crown and it is after Dream sans got released from stone then Dandelion finally return his crown back to him. Dandelion took Dreams place as the Guardian of positivity and no one knew how. And then she give him back when he finally got out of prison.

Info about Dandelion.

(Warning kind of dark, tragic, sensitive content, and... uhm Idk)

Here some few infos before moving straight to Dandelions info.

I created Dandelion personally to be Dream's best friend and don't get any ideas. Their friendship is purely platontic. Sure, they can be intimate and affectionate by physical touch but not sexual.

Their relationship is purely platonic.

Dandelion’s relationship status: Single as hell until Shattered sans came.

Before Shattered, despite the fact that she’s pretty, smart and mature. There are a lot of people wanting to date her but Dandelion is too hardcore to get herself a lover, however, ever since I found out about Shattered sans's existence then I ship him and her because he and Dream is not the same person, plus, Shattered tries to score on Dandelion after he took a liking on Dandelion because she's the only female who he's comfortable around. (In my Au ofc)

Just want to let you know that before their relationship get official. Firstly, they were started as friends with benefits (Like Shattered wants Dandelions negativity because her negativity is stronger than everyone else that he had been around while Dandelion, well, she knew it is stupid and weird to her but she wants affection and attention return. But hey, shes someone with needs after all) before officially in a romantic relationship.

But also their relationship is kind of toxic before they finally get into a healthy one.

Now the reason why she’s so hard to be attracted to other men except shattered, because if she’s so pretty how come she’s a hard pick? Well heres the reason.

Well, it all started with Dandelion's parents, they were gods. Dandelion's mother is the Goddess of Wisdom and Knowledge while Dandelion's father is the God of Temptation and Redemption. Dandelion's mother abandoned Dandelion when she was 4 because the father of Dandelion uses his kids for power and would kills them off once they off age... (14 years old)... because he feared that they might over throne him.

The lucky ones that survived were sent away or move out, and one of them is close to Dandelion who is her half brother and he was sent to the asylum hospital even despite, him being mental stable and before he got sent away, he did met Dandelion but their relationship is not close however they were siblings through heart and Dandelion's half brother gave her his black moon themed crown and after he got sent away, Dandelion thought that he died because her father told her so.

Her father doesn't care about Dandelion or her safety while Dandelion's mother cares about Dandelion even despites, abandoning her own daughter in order to save Dandelion from the unfaithful fate. Plus, Dandelion does not get along with her other siblings including the half ones. However, only her half brother (That I had already mentioned now) and I kind of forgot his name but I will check it later while also only get along with her sister named Nera by blood because Nera is first nice to Dandelion and also still kind to Dandelion even despites, her coldness towards Nera.

Now the info of Dandelion fully.

Full name: Danielle Dandelion Angelina Martell.

Nickname(s): Dan, Angel, Lion, Lina (Simple nicknames calling); Martell, Morghulis, (Simple calling last name as respect, but Dandelion never wanted everyone to know, so they only call her Angelina or Dandelion thinking it’s her name or one of the two, but true to be told that’s all her real names).

Title: Symbol of Positivity, Valīdra Goddess Joy, and Happiness, Guardian of Tender Hearts, The Guardian Matron, and Lady of Hope and Optimism, Heiress of Divine Insight and Equilibrium, Divine Emissary of Balance, and Wisdom.

Known as: Sister of Nera, The Second Positive Guardian, Mother of Many, Guardian Angel, Champion of Love, Loving Matriarch.

Culture: Valyrian.

Spouse: Shattered dream sans (Her husband).

Gender: Female.

Age: ageless, but older than other Valaryons, which includes her own children.

Birth date: 27/10.

Appearance:

Valīdra Goddess of Joy and Happiness, also known as Dandelion the Guardian of Tender Hearts, is a striking figure. She stands tall, towering over most, even her best friend Dream Sans. Her long tresses flow like liquid gold, cascading down her back and past her shoulders, reminiscent of a field of vibrant, blossoming flowers. To keep her mane at bay, the rest of her curly golden locks are neatly tied up, ensuring they don't impede her movements. A serene, smiling visage graces her countenance, contrasting with the dark mask she often wears, hinting at a depth beyond the joy she embodies.

Her attire reflects her regal yet approachable nature. She adorns herself in a high-necked top, paired with sleek black leggings for ease of movement. She also wears a long cloth that she designed it into a scarf.

She used Dreams crown as not only resembling her as the positive guardian but also a memory of her best friend. After Dream got out of his stone, then she used the crown that her half brother gave her aka the black moon theme crown.

Completing her ensemble are her distinctive yellow gloves and a red ball featuring a star, a charming accessory that draws attention to her nurturing and protective nature.

Valīdra's outward appearance is a reflection of the joy and tenderness she represents, encapsulating both grace and resilience in her regal bearing.

Behind her dark mask, Dandelion's eyes glimmer with a captivating dichotomy. One eye is a deep, enchanting violet, reminiscent of twilight's mysterious allure, while the other eye dazzles with a vibrant pink hue, radiating an effervescent warmth. Peering through the slits of a snake, her pupils lend an uncanny and mesmerizing quality to her gaze, evoking the image of a wise and all-seeing guardian. These mismatched eyes, framed by the darkness of her mask, hold within them a depth of emotion and an underlying hint of the otherworldly, adding layers of enigma to her already captivating presence.

Dandelion has wings as well. Her majestic golden angel wings expand outward in impressive grandeur, towering over her form with a profound sense of celestial grace. Each feather glistens with an ethereal luminosity, casting a radiant glow that illuminates her presence. As she unfurls them, the wings stretch far and wide, embodying an embodiment of divine protection and serenity. The feathers, iridescent in their hues, shimmer with a celestial luster, embodying the pure essence of joy and benevolence. When in motion, these resplendent wings move with a graceful fluidity.

In Dandelions passive form, the form that she call it her past self of what she used to look like before her death in a young age, instead of her long golden curly hair, they were now long layered mullet pale brown hair, the two sides of the hair will be trimmed to hug the face and the back of the tail will be cut in a very special layer.

Dandelion really hated how she looks like her mother who abandoned her when she was young. The first person who betray her was literally a god, her mother. However, Dandelion eyes remain the same mismatched eyes, one eye is a deep, enchanting violet, reminiscent of twilight's mysterious allure, while the other eye dazzles with a vibrant pink hue, radiating an effervescent warmth.

In clothing, it did not change by the way.

Personality:

INFP personality type. She intuitively understood others and could naturally detect their motivations. Not only that, but she can even know how someone else is feeling before the person knows it.

Dandelion is a straightforward and calm polite woman, she most likely a calm individual but not the type to be mess with. She isn’t like her best friend, but she always stayed prefect because her personal reasons.

When it comes to feelings, it was something to her and she hid them, she completely controlled them, quieted them, and made them fade. But despite showing no emotions and yet she can show her emotions when she feels relaxed or safe. Plus, she had trust issues but secretly a provocateur as well.

Powers and abilities – born naturally and just like her mother, Dandelion is one of the most different from, even from her children, plus, she’s the child of god, and so her powers are different and Dandelion Angelina seemingly got it some from both her mother and father. And like some she got inherited it from her parents.

Regeneration and healing magic: Healing herself and others. Not only that, but she also can regenerated her body if it ever one got cut of or smth else.

Confession: Forcing others to tell the truth, she can tell who is telling the truth by looking at them in the eye, and she has an ability that can force others by cornering them or doing it in a hard way by using this ability.

Lie Detection: Detecting lies told by others.

Empathy: Sensing others’ emotions.

Mind Control: Controlling another person’s mind and actions.

Eidetic Knowledge: This one was inherited it from her mother, this allows Dandelion to have good memories, for an example, like when she thought of her death, she can still remember them forever and every detail of it, no matter what and she can remember everything, but not all at once unless you mention, refer to or ask her about it.

Archaic Arsenal: She has an ability that allows her to summon a bow and a scythe. Just like her mother and she inherited it from her mother, but she mainly uses bow because it’s simple for her. However, she would use the scythe if it needed, plus, she needed to keep a good image to the monsters in the Undertale for her best friend, Dream.

Transposession: Inherited this ability from her mother, it allows Dandelion to swap places with another person that she can think of or choose to if she saw someone she wants to swap places with and this ability even allows her to share with a someone just so they can swap places easily.

Sexuality: Straight.

Love interest: Shattered sans.

Like: Her children ^^ especially Adora & Dax (The children of Dandelion and Shattered sans), her husband, her grandchildren, Nera (So far the only sibling that she’s able to get along with), her family, gentlemen, entertainment, respect, rain, ocean, taking a walk at night, children, taking care of them, Dream aka her best friend, giving blessings to the rightful and deserving people, dancing, singing, writing letters to Dream and reading book or story ones for bedtime for her children.

Dislike and Hate: Her father, the devil of a 'friend', Nightmare sans, being weak, being hesitant in worst situations, delusional, Ink sans, being emotional or crying, being left out, being alone, being ignored, losing any of her children, losing her family, overthinking, overreacting, toxic relationships, and putting her loved ones in danger.

Interesting facts about Danielle Dandelion Angelina:

Fact 1: Dandelion's full name is Danielle Dandelion Angelina Martell.

Fact 2: Dandelion's last name is her mother’s last name even despite, her disliking and hatred towards her mother, she still prefers her mother’s last name than the bastard of a father of hers because she knew what he did to her mother and thinking it was her the reason why her mother abandoned her. And so, she decided to hate her mother as well, but not too much than Nightmare sans, Ink sans, and her father.

Fact 3: Dandelion only dislikes her 'friend' aka the literal 'devil' that causes her death and yeah.

Fact 4: Dandelion sees Dream as a brother and loved him like a family.

Fact 5: Dandelion hate being call by her first name because it brings her back memories of her past before she got abandoned by her mother. And why exactly? Her mother always calls her by her first name.

Fact 6: Even Dandelion felt disappointed that her first name is beautiful and nice, but her past gets to her.

Fact 7: Dandelion still able to use that name, but she much preferred to named it to a nameless child as an honor for them.

Fact 6: Dandelion loathes her father more than her mother because he r@pe her mother and he's one of the main reasons why Dandelion don't want to be in a relationship and get uncomfortable around men but Dream is the exception.

Fact 7: Dream is so important to Dandelion that Dandelion would go as far as sacrificing herself or breaking her own mask to let all the darkness consumed her but there might a possibility that Dandelion would go into her 'passive' form however she still protects Dream despites, her weaken state. These two are so sweet, so if anyone messes with Dream then they will find out that Dandelion is there to protect him and she will do anything to protect her best friend.

Fact 8: Well, I mentioned there's Nera but it is no longer count anymore because Nera's fate has gone to death like Nera died with her husband, leaving her two twin daughters and Dandelion willingly take the twins in.

#undertale aus #dream sans #oc #Crossover #Game of thrones x House of the dragon x Undertale (I guess)#Doesnt make sense but yeah #I have an AU about GOT and HOFTD #This is a whole connection I think or maybe not #Fnaf related btw #weird I know

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sugawhaaa · 11 months

Text

Jungkook x reader

"Take my hands now,"

Pairing: non!idol jungkook x fem!reader

Genre: high-school/College AU, friends to lovers

Warings:none

A/N: Euphoria is such a gorgeous and meaningful song and it's Festa season. So I thought I would finally write a lovely fanfic for our lovely boy

Songs to listen to while reading:

You sat on a wooden bench in your local playground. It was around 5pm so there were no kids around but this park was a good place to get some air. It was the first week of June and it suddenly hit you. Your in grade 12 and your going to graduate in a few weeks. More like a few days and you didn't have a clue as to what you were going to do. You have many little hobbies that could spark into a career, but what to choose...

You rested your head back on the bench and looked up at the sky. It was sunset so it was like a purple color.

"Y/N?" You heard a familiar voice say your name. You opened your eyes and looked to see who was infront of you. You sighed.

"Jungkook?" You said with a smile.

"What are you doing out here?" He said sitting down next to you.

"Needed some air...and you know trip down memory lane," you chuckled looking at the ground.

"Ah yes, this park is real special huh?" Jungkook smiled as he stared up at the slowly setting sun. This park is actually where you and Jungkook first met. When you were around 6 to 7 years old you had just moved into this neighborhood. You went to the park with your mother and as she was talking to some new neighbors you were playing. You then tripped on one of the steps and got hurt. When you looked up there was a little boy. He was wearing a dark green shirt with dinosaurs on it, dark blue leggings, and spider man sneakers.

He took one glance at you and

"Are you okay!?" He said coming over to you.

"Yeah," You said taking his hand as he helped you back up the steps.

"My names jungkook!" The boy said with a big grin.

"I'm Y/N," you said shyly. "Jungkook..."

"That's me!"

"I like your sneakers," you said pointing at them.

He thanked you and invited you to play with him and you became friends. As you were about to leave the park with your mother you found out you are neighbors.

"What are the chances!" He said as you walked up the side of the street. 11 years later and you find yourself at the same park with the same boy.

"What's on your mind," he said breaking you out of your thoughts.

"Oh nothing..." you said as you repeatedly stepped on a dandelion that was by the bench.

"No. I know somethings upsetting you," he said looking at you with those determined eyes. You couldn't help but blush, his face was so close to yours.

"Okay fine! I have a lot of things on my mind," you said looking away from him again.

"Like what?"

There was a nice breeze that messed with your hair. As jungkook awaited your response his hair swayed in the wind and the determined shines in his eyes seem to get brighter just for a moment. While you were frustrated and unable to speak. What was this feeling? Could it be love? No no that's impossible, he's just a friend. No way are you going to fall in love with your childhood friend. But...

~Jungkook's POV~

"Am I making her uncomfortable?" I thought to myself as she awkwardly stared at me. Perhaps I was being too intense, with the whole stare and confident talk. Maybe she wasn't upset at all and I'm just overreacting!? But the look in her big, E/C, eyes, and her cute, puffy, lips how does she always look so beautiful. I need to tell her how I feel. Nows a good time. Maybe if I talk first she'll join in and it'll continue all good! Just as I was about to tell her everything she spoke up.

~Your POV~

"I just don't know what to do after high-school, there's so many potential things I can do. It's overwhelming. Getting my own house and a stable job and a husband and kids and just it's so much. My parents want so much for me but I don't even know what I want!" You said as some small tears stung in the corners of your eyes. It's not like you haven't thought about this before, why are you crying now? "Sorry, I don't know what's up with me," you said gently wiping away your tears. Jungkook then pulled you into a hug.

"It's okay, you don't have to know everything all at once," he said gently petting your hair on the back of your head.

"But I feel like I do. And even the things I do know I can't even tell anyone, I'm scared," you said hugging him tight. Jungkook's expression changed for a moment before going back to his concerned gaze. He let go of the hug and looked you in your burning eyes.

"I understand and it's hard, really hard, but you have to do it at some point," he said with burning passion. You looked at him with wide eyes as your eyes started watering. You looked down at your knees as you thought about his words. "As practice tell me everything you want to say to anyone. Your parents, your teachers, your friends anyone. Let it all out,"

You took a deep breath as you prepared to do as he asked you. And as he requested you let everything out. Maybe a little too much...but he asked for it. That's when you let a little too much slip out.

"And I have a crush on you and I just can't find a way to tell you!" You immediately slapped your palm against your lips as you realized what you had just said. You stood up, eyes wide as you looked down on a star struck Jungkook. "I-I," you tried to come up with some kind of excuse as to why you said that but anything you came up just sounded stupid. "That was...a joke! Or something..." you said as your cheeks got hotter.

"You like me?" He said standing up and taking your hands in his. You sighed as you looked away from him.

"Yes," you said looking back up at him.

"I" Jungkook said before pausing again, "I like you too," he said with a little grin as he averted his gaze from you. Your face lit up when he finished his statement.

"You do?!" You said excitedly.

"No I was joking..." he said frowning.

"Oh..."

"I'm just kidding! I freakin love you and I just couldn't figure out how to tell you!" He said waving his arms around like a crazy man. You laughed at his gestures before slapping him on the arm.

"You asshole! I started panicking!" You said as you smacked him with the sleeve of your jacket. Jungkook giggled as he told you to stop hitting him. You pouted before randomly hugging him catching Jk off guard. Your stomach then growled. You buried your face in his shoulder out of embarrassment.

"Jagiya! Did you not eat dinner today!" He howled at you in shock.

"No...I guess I just got distracted," you mumbled but JK was still able to hear you loud and clear

"Let's go back to my house and I'll make you something," He said tilting his head over to his house.

"What about your parents?" You asked drawing his attention back to you.

"They're out playing some games with other old people," Jungkook laughed, his shoulders bouncing .

"Alright then," you said heading for the street. Jungkooks cold hand held yours as you walked up the street. Your feet were dragging because of how slow you were walking, it was calming. "This feels so strange," you said watching your feet move on command.

"What do you mean exaclty?" Jungkook said looking at you.

"Well, we've been friends for so long, it's just hard to believe after all this time...we're finally dating," you smiled all giddy giddy. Jungkook giggled.

"I know. It's hard to believe, it's like it's too good to be true," Jungkook looked up at the sky that was slowly turning darker. "I don't even know how to act because your the first girl I've ever met that makes me feel like this,"

You looked up at him when he finished talking "when did you realize you liked me?"

"Um a long time ago," he said with pink cheeks that he chewed from the inside. You got closer to him to pressure him into answering you directly. "Fine, one time in grade seven," he huffed as he clenched your hand.

"Really!? That long ago!" Your jaw dropped. How crud that would've been almost 6 years ago! How in the world did he hold it in for so long.

"Yeah, during that one pool party for J-hope's birthday," he grinned a bit. It was clear he was replaying the memory in his mind but he refused to let him giddy smile shine through. Suddenly there was another gust of wind. Jungkook seemed to be basking in the breeze but you other the other hand wasn't too pleased. A cropped tank top didn't feel nice in the cold wind.

"Brrr," you said rubbing your arms before going back to hold Jungkooks hand.

"You cold?" He asked worriedly.

"A little bit but we're almost at your place it's fine," before you could even finish your sentence Jungkook let go of your hand and started wipping of his jacket. "Jk...what are you doing,"

"Giving you my jacket obviously," he said as he wrapped the warm yellow fabric around you. You held the collar of it with one hand while the other went right back to his hand. A little grin appeared on your lips to accompany the butterflies in your stomach. "Such a kdrama moment" you thought to yourself.

It wasn't long before you arrived at the ever so familiar house Jungkook lived in. But as you approached it, you noticed a car in the driveway. You just ignored it and walked inside with him. But once you walked in you saw Jungkook's mom holding dish.

"Sweetie your home!" She smiled widely when she turned around. She looked shocked, her mouth opened slightly. "Are you two-?"

~The end~

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