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starry-skies-116 · 2 years

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GregEvan Character Analysis Part 4 (Continued) FNAF: Project Samsara AU

Part 6- Duty-Bound:

Evan.

Evanescent.

His name means transience- fugaciousness. His very name means the brilliance of every moment that casts a shadow of the lingering past.

When the blossoms are in season, pure and in bloom, and the spring butterflies fluttering, coming alive abound- whether they be crawling from their cocoons born anew or migrating back home, Evan is always reminded of their transient beauty.

The ever-changing nature of individuals, the false constant that is names- the ever-changing identities, likes and dislikes of human beings as his people question what they are, what their purpose and their creation, their nature is on earth.

The lotuses float on the ponds in the new and unfamiliar environment, where the grass is verdant and lush, the morning dew dissipating- yet another sign of transience, he thinks to himself as he peels back the leafy wrapping of a spring roll his older brother got him from one of the nearby food stalls. He sees and embraces a world mired in impermanence- where every life lost is a crack in Mother Nature´s heart, where every second counts, where every fleeting moment matters more than anything else in the world.

If nothing else, we have the present moment.

And even the moments illuminated within those now-dreams, the faint scent and gentle, warm embrace of the glow of memories grow further closer and yet further distant.

The butterflies come forth, nestled amidst the branches of their home where they once dwelled as caterpillars gnawing on the leaves and drinking in the early morning dew like dehydrated men.

The white blossoms and pure lotus flowers aflush with faint, rosy specks of pink glimmer underneath the pale moonlight, cutting through the darkness of the midnight like the galaxies and stars, celestial bodies reflected in the twilight yawn of heaven´s black: and it is then that Evan has the same dream.

His family is with him- his mother, his father and his two siblings. His heart is happy, his stomach is full, and underneath the sky and upon the earth, he is at peace once more.

And now, more than ever, with even his primal, innermost desires unsatisfied, those moments are what he desires. Perhaps, deep inside his heart somewhere… those carefree, perfect days of being a happy family together had not ended for him.

Somewhere, mired in this world of impermanence- this perfect, eternal body longs for the ephemeral moments of the past. For his soul to be whole again- for his family and home to be unbroken once more.

And yet, as snow thaws and melts come the emergence of spring flowers, taking root within the soil… as those same flowers wither and shrivel upon the arrival of blizzarding winter storms… things are always subject to change. Just as things change in this world, he too, must awaken from this dream of eternity and stillness, to the world mired in transience- of both destruction and creation, of tragedy and miracles.

He too, must change.

With every step he takes forward, every silent breath he huffs out as he clambers to his feet- something stirs within him. Perhaps the beckoning echo of fond yesterdays spent with all he ever loved and treasured, the desiderata of bygone days carved within his mind.

And as the butterflies too, escape from their cocoons to awaken from rebirth into a new world in a beautiful new form, to fly to a new home so soon: Evan, too, must embrace the new, ever-changing backdrop of the world- this new form, this new identity.

¨My name is Gregory.¨

Gregory. The english variant of Gregorios, anglicized.

Vigilant, watchful and awake. Aware of all. Unwavering, unshakeable and unbreakable, will forever enduring and indomitable come whatever challenges shall try to stagger him, lead him astray.

No longer shall he show shame, show fear. There the memories linger, day after day, pushing him to take charge of his own destiny, to overcome the grief and pain, to overcome all.

Pushing him to overcome.

Gregory now deems it his responsibility to seek out the same happiness and peace he lost, the life that was so tragically ripped from him alongside his dignity, his family and home, and his humanity- so long ago. He doesn´t know what changed over the passage of time, but he merely accepts it and moves on like mature adults would do, seeking to merely find peace and live out his life once more.

Time leaves wounds, and yet heals them too- the cycle of seasons persists forevermore, engaging all life in perpetual death and rebirth of perfect harmony.

All things must be born, grow up, and die, only to repeat. Nothing remains permanent, not even the blackness of death.

Evan remains within him, like the memories of the distant past. This day, too, shall be the day when he emerges from the cocoon- the day that Gregory was born.

And so he sets out to recreate his life anew, to make use of this miraculous second chance: to ensure that whatever may be the cost, no matter what comes in his way, no matter how difficult things will get…

He will crush all obstacles underneath his heel and continue to move forward to his dream- his unshakeable, unchanging dream, enduring forevermore.

To find his new family, to live out and entrust his new dream unto the future like all those before him have done, and like he should´ve done.

¨I´m so proud of you, Gregory,¨ he whispers to himself with a fond smile on his face as he slides on the blue striped shirt alongside the socks and shoes he got from Glamrock Gifts. He shudders in pleasure and delight as he rubs his arms- no touch present to comfort him other than himself. ¨You´re so mature… so grownup, now. You´ve come so far. Keep going- keep trying. You can do this.¨

It´s not about the things you can or cannot do, after all, he reminds himself. It´s about the things you must do- it´s about your duty to the world, the legacy you wish to fulfill and leave behind- the dream you will entrust to everyone who comes after- in this case, to your new life.

There are things that you have to do, no matter what.

He grits his teeth and pushes forward, the flame forever burning, brighter than the stars. And amidst it all… he continues to persist, to live. Nothing is immutable, but…

Despite it all, it´s still him. When he looks in the mirror, it has always been him.

And it shall be him, enduring forevermore.

Part 7- To The Ends Of A Dream:

I think I´ll cut to the chase and give the short version before launching into the long explanation here: Evan, or rather, Gregory, becomes a walking contradiction to himself post-awakening and post-remembrance.

Though he is artificial, he is alive and can breathe. He hungers and tires, bleeds and breathes, laughs and cries as humans do.

Though he was once kind, a boy of deep and sincere faith, that faith has since been warped and twisted beyond compare. And as he has once carried himself with a timid and sensitive posture, always trembling and whimpering, now it is as though that facet of his mind had been all but stripped away, reduced to ash in the wind.

Grief and love have changed him- he feels as though it is HIS PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY, from then on, to put his family back together.

After nearly five months of grieving, on that day, he somehow wipes his tears away and pulls himself up by the boostraps, finding the willpower to take initiative and give himself the courage and strength boost to do what, in his eyes, was absolutely imperative to be done.

By the time Gregory ¨leaves the nest¨, he primarily leaves the safety of the sticky note room in pursuit of three main goals:

To find the shadow and spirit to complete his form. He serves as the physical vessel of which the consciousness, life force (in the form of stolen remnant) and the identity are sealed within via a mixture of technology and presumably dark supernatural sorcery of sorts, and at present, Evan Afton has been split into the shadow, the spirit and the vessel- his present goal is to reunite with these aspects of his atman to be ¨whole¨ again.

To reunite with his family: GregEvan is a very family oriented person, often forging and creating strong bonds with the people he trusts. Naturally, when he loses his family (despite his complicated relationship with his siblings and spiraling spiritual and mental state at the time of his death), he is devastated upon learning about this when he reawakens from slumber. He wants to ¨recreate¨ his family, finding a suitable ¨substitute¨ for an older brother and younger sister, as well as his father and mother, living out that ¨found family¨ trope to fulfill his own happiness. Arguably, this can be seen as a bit selfish, but can you really blame him? He´s a kid. He thinks he´s finally accepted loss of his family and wants to find a new one, since that´s the conclusion a ten year old would arrive at.

To find and retrieve a new home, including claiming back relics of the past. The loss has scarred Gregory so deep that he actively searches the Pizzaplex in search of territory to claim- the Afton Family silo on the nearby table is further evidence of how he wishes to recreate his family and home. He´s basically living in the past at this point, even though he´s under the strong delusion that he´s accepted the past and moved on by trying to ¨find new happiness¨, as he is under the impression that his family is dead, or has forgotten him and moved on.

Gregory is, at this point, under the influence of the strong belief that the ends always, ALWAYS justify the means, which is the driving force behind all his actions- that he will do anything, and he means ANYTHING, to squash every obstacle underneath his heel that poses a threat to his life and to his family, and that could potentially prevent him from cultivating and nurturing his dream.

¨I don´t support jumping to those conclusions of yours. I won´t fall to you.¨

Gregory, as a result of his goals and how his trauma has changed him, develops a strong sense of responsibility and duty, as well as an impressive willpower and unbreakable, resilient spirit from this mindset of ¨whatever it takes¨. This trait is a double edged sword at its simplest description- on one hand, it grants him an able and strategic mind with the newfound and exemplary computing power and intelligence he has, willing to form elaborate plans to eliminate his obstacles to whatever short term or long term goals he may have. It grants him an unshakeable drive and will as his goals continue to endure and remain unchanged despite the tumultuous environment around him, or even all the odds working against him. Even when each day feels like trying to escape a warzone, he endures and remains steadfast, dignified and unwavering in his pursuit- an honorable trait to have.

Most of all, as cheesy as it sounds- he never gives up hope. He never abandons the possibility, no matter how small, that there is always a way to work towards your dream and your deepest desires.

However, any virtue can turn into a vice. The willpower and sense of responsibility and duty Gregory develops turn him headstrong, obstinate and mistrusting, as seen in teh game. For the entire time Gregory carries himself in a terse, restrained and apprehensive manner, he becomes apathetic to the pain and struggles of the other animatronics, entirely unaware that they are under his father´s control- again, expressed via the darker side of his vigilant, mercilessly judgemental demeanor.

Even despite his starkly contrasting empathetic attitude towards Freddy over losing Bonnie, he holds the other Glamrocks in extremely low regard and even occasionally relishes holding a position of power over those who hurt him or wrong him.

He couldn´t care less about them, saying that their actions are inexcusable, and goes through with destroying and scavenging their parts anyway to upgrade Freddy: Gregory even lies through his teeth to his older brother about where he got the parts from, thus indirectly hurting his feelings deeply when Glammike finds out the truth. However, he does feel guilt and anxiety regarding this a bit later. As steadfast and unwavering as his commitment is to his goals, he is also rigid- not caring about the obstacle in front of him, or the collateral damage that he´ll cause by getting rid of it to further his pursuits- all he knows is that it poses a threat to his life and his dream, and he must eliminate it.

He does retain certain aspects of his avoidant personality he once retained in the past, such as hiding from and actively expressing fear of the other animatronics and Vanny in the beginning, as well as his father, even to the point of crying out of fear as he once did.

His willpower also does not seem to restrict his creative potential by any means, evidenced by him deducing and recreating information of past events in the Pizzaplex, as well as formulating plans to temporarily decommission the other animatronics from what paltry information was given in the emails and S.T.A.F.F. messages as seen in-game.

It also does not appear to hinder his acceptance of blame, as he fully accepts responsibility post-game for everything he´s ever done and actively tries to make amends with everyone he´s wronged. However, his rigidity does spike his fear of confrontation, as he bursts into hysterics and tears whenever Glammike yells at him or argues with him, and also becomes intensely hostile- courtesy of bad memories resurfacing as a result of probably C-PTSD.

Gregory also is also irrationally upset whenever his set criteria and expectations are not met, and often berates either himself or external circumstances, as seen when he lashes out in anger at the Mr. Hippo magnet he recieves in game and expresses dismay at the machine eating his pass. This trait is significantly exacerbated by the fact that the more sincere, close and familial Gregory´s and Freddy´s relationship becomes, the more secrets they are forced to either share or keep from one another the more they learn about each other.

Gregory’s willpower also allows him to develop a sense of confidence and reassurance in himself, a sense of grounding and duty originally fueled by self-praise until Freddy comes along and becomes the best friend and father figure he desperately needed. This temporarily dispels the spiritual corruption present in his consciousness and spiritual core.

He also occasionally has a lighthearted demeanor on the rare occasion he cuts lose, cracking witty jokes and even laughing at some of Freddy/Michael´s bad puns.

And towards those he cares about genuinely, Gregory also expresses a strong sense of empathy, protectiveness and camaraderie, having a father/son and older brother/younger brother relationship with him (a combination of the two). He looks up to Freddy with nothing but admiration, sincerity and warmth in his eyes, eventually evolving into pure love, expressive affection and respect- similar to the feelings he had towards Michael when he was still alive.

Because of this, he recognizes Freddy as a ¨new older brother¨. And since Vanessa (separate from her alter ego Vanny) reminds him so much of his little sister Elizabeth, he actively thinks of her as a new little sister, until he learns the truth about their identities.

He is also kinder towards Vanessa upon learning the truth about her and her circumstances, and ends up repairing his relationship and trust with Vanessa/Elizabeth, as well as Glamrock Freddy/Michael- he also seeks to respect Freddy´s wishes starting post-game as a result of the animatronic bear being the father figure to Gregory, and to follow his older brother´s example. He has the ability to recognize change and a good heart as a result of his improved sense of judgement of others, sincerely forgiving, apologizing to and approving of Michael after learning of all he did to prevent further tragedy and save the souls of everyone who fell victim to it.

Now, let´s go to the reason as to why he wishes to achieve these goals: well, because as for locating and recreating his family, it´s obvious that the trauma and grief have affected him to such an extent that he´s deluded himself into ¨moving on¨ whilst he simultaneously tries to recreate the past life and memories that he missed in his present life.

And as for reuniting all the components of his avatar, Gregory is in an extremely vulnerable state when it is split into the vessel, the shadow and the soul. The vessel expresses this via feelings of extensive fatigue, hunger and starvation that gnaw at the back of the mind even when they´re satisfied- a perpetual reminder that he needs to get up and get shit done, perhaps. The way that the physical and spiritual body and form work on a simpler-explained level is that the body, the shadow and the spirit is the complete entity, held together by the remnant, or the vital quintessence and life force that composes each living being- the spiritual blood is the complete manifestation of the person, hence why they cannot change forms like spirits of the deceased can.

Although the splitting of the soul is a safety measure- a sort of failsafe- upon death for those with unique circumstances like Gregory/Evan, keep in mind that he serves as the physical vessel with the consciousness, memories, spiritual core/heart, borrowed remnant and identity implanted into him.

One wrong move could potentially result in his destruction and thus the destruction of the entire avatar, resulting in his entire being ceasing to exist- he has to remain hypervigilant at all costs in the face of any dangerous circumstances he may be in, in order to ensure his survival and the eventual reunification of himself. He needs to be EXTREMELY careful- calculating his every move, because one wrong misstep and he could meet his demise.

So, taking his stressful situation into account…

Can you really blame him for being a bundle of nerves? At least, in this universe?

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with-love-anu · 4 years

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Desiderata: When The Heart Speaks

PART: 8

WORD COUNT: 1.7K

PAIRING: Sirius Black x Reader

SUMMARY: You had been best friends with James, Remus, Sirius and Peter. Read your journey of love, friendship and jealousy through your wonderful years at Hogwarts. Enjoy!

SERIES MASTERLIST

Sirius was being different. Not that you didn’t like it, but it was new. He had started to call you “my love” which never failed to make you blush. He had stopped flirting with anyone else all together and was directing every bit of his attention towards you. And you were over the moon. You couldn’t stop smiling, giggling as Sirius flirted with you. So, you did the only thing you could think of. You flirted back.

The first time you did it, you saw Sirius’s eye’s widen as a deep red colour tinted his cheeks and neck. He stuttered, amusing you, before muttering some lame excuse and leaving as fast as possible. Your cheeks hurted from how wide you grinned. Lily beside you, eyed you with raised eyebrows, giving you a knowing expression. James and Remus were splayed on the floor laughing so hard they had tears in their eyes. Did you just see your best friend, supposed playboy of the damn school blush and stutter nervously because you flirted with him? More importantly; did he start considering you more than a friend? Did you actually have a chance with him?

It took a while, before Sirius stopped blushing uncontrollably whenever you flirted back. This had been going on for months now. The two of you would tease each other; but it never went more than that. You actually wondered whether this was a part of some big joke. James and Remus continually assured you that it wasn’t.

***

“My love, did you even eat this morning?” Sirius asked concerned as you entered the history of magic classroom out of breath. Your heart gave a flutter. You had overslept and hardly had the time to take a shower before rushing for your first class.

“No. I overslept.” You said sitting down beside him.

“Here, I saved some muffins for you”

He offered you your favorite, blueberry and banana flavored cakes. You beamed at him.

“Why, thank you!” you said in a flirty tone taking one and eating it discreetly to make sure not to get the attention of your seemingly, ever-tired professor.

“Anything for you babe;” he said lowly, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

You gulped. He looked at you like he was going to kiss you. You stared at him, his grey eyes looking at you so intensely, it made your heart rate spike up. You were sure that Sirius who was sitting at quite a distance could hear your heart beat. He moved forward, and placed a kiss on your cheek making you look away. You blushed. Hard. You looked forward trying to listen to the professor (or attempting to).

As he droned on and on about goblin wars, you felt Sirius’s hand cover your own. You smiled. You shifted closer to him and heard him suck a breath. Your thighs were touching and your arms were over each other. You pursed your lips to stop grinning. You could see Sirius at the corner of your eyes having a smirk on his face even though his cheeks were tinted pink. Throughout the lesson you were torn between wanting it to end as soon as possible; so that you could stop yourself from yanking his face towards you kissing him until you were both breathless and wanting it to last forever; to stay close to him in case he didn’t want what you did.

When the lesson ended James put an arm around you catching up.

“Have fun in the class?” he asked the two of you wriggling his eyebrows. Both of you flushed. Sirius slapped away his arm from around you put his own. You raised your eyebrows at the gesture and rolled his eyes playfully.

***

“Y/n!!” Sebastian grinned beside you as the two of you worked on ancient runes in the quiet library. “So, Sirius huh?” he said wriggling his eyebrows.

“Ahhhh…” you groaned as you face palmed. Sebastian chuckled.

“It’s okay… I’ll find a place to repair my broken heart!” he sniffed, wiping away a fake tear from his face.

“Awww” you gawked lovingly. “You’ll always be my favourite man!!” you said bumping your shoulder with his. He bumped yours in return. You giggled.

“What are you doing?” a voice came behind you.

You turned to see Sirius. His jaw was clenched and if looks could kill, Sebastian would be dead twice over.

“Studying. Runes.” Sebastian replied gesturing towards the books.

“We are done, actually. So Y/n,” he said turning towards you. “I’ll be taking my leave. Don’t forget the charms lesson tomorrow. Bub-Bye!”

“Sure. Bye.” You watched him as he packed his books to leave. Sirius was beside you fuming silently. You bit your cheeks to stop smiling. It was fun to see Sirius jealous. It was adorable, actually. It reminded you of an angry kitten.

After he left, you gestured Sirius to sit beside you. After all you still had work left. He sat beside you opening and closing his mouth frequently. You sighed.

“You could say what you want Sirius, it’s just me.” You said not looking at him.

He cleared his throat before speaking.

“I didn’t know Sebastian,” he spat his name, “and you were so close”

You looked up at him. You were shocked to find vulnerability in his eyes.

“Sirius,” you started wanting to clear any confusion. “Sebastian is a friend. Only a friend. We tease each other for fun. There is nothing between us. Ever was or will be.”

Sirius looked at you as if trying to determine whether you were being honest. He took a deep breath.

“Yaa… I knew that” he said as if it didn’t matter reading the book in front of him.

“Of course not! You weren’t jealous at all” you said smirking making Sirius stutter yet again.

***

The party was in full swing. Everyone from different houses fifth year and above had come and were having fun of their lives. You wore a black dress that hugged your curves perfectly, hiding what you didn’t want to show displaying your best features. You had curled your hair and applied a bit of makeup too. Lily whistled as she saw you. As you both went down arm in arm you tried to spot your besties. To say Sirius way surprised would be an understatement. His mouth legit dropped when he saw you.

Remus nudged him saying, “Close it, or a fly would enter in”

He stumbled and stuttered, gulping before finally saying, “You look gorgeous”

“Thank you, you don’t look bad either.” You said smiling.

You spent the rest of the evening dancing with Sirius. Man! Did he know how to move! Placing his hands over your hips, your arms around your neck; you swayed to the beats of music. You were hyperaware of the places he was touching you. Your body bloomed with heat and your heart never calmed down. Sirius gazed at you as if you were the only person in the whole wide world. He felt the same.

You were broken out of your trance, as someone spilled something over you. Shit! Your skirt was soaked.

“Fuck- why don’t you clean this up while I wait for you?” Sirius asked solemnly.

You nodded as you went to your dorm muttering some cleaning and drying spells. Once satisfied you went down looking for Sirius.

You gasped as you saw him. He was kissing Marlene. Tears prickled your eyes as your whole body turned rigid. Of-course it was a game to him. Your head felt like it would burst. You turned and ran into your dorm bathroom. No reason for anyone to see you like this. You put a hand over your mouth trying to muffle your screams. You plopped on the cold tiles as you sobbed uncontrollably, your body shaking. It hurt. It hurt so damn much. Sirius never loved you, he never could, he never would. Those jealous girls from the bathroom were right, you were nothing more than a new conquest. You heard knocking outside your door.

“Y/n!! open up, let me explain.” Sirius shouted.

You tried to breathe, but couldn’t do anything except whimpering a bit more.

“NO!” you screamed.

“Y/n, please!” Sirius pleaded.

“Why are you even here? You broke my heart, made a fool out of me; what more do you want? You knew I loved you still you played this bloody game with me!” You shouted.

“Y/n, after all this time, you still don’t know I love you?” Sirius said sucking a breath.

That cleared your mind. He loved you-?

“What?” you croaked.

“Bloody hell Y/n! I am head over heals in love with you, can’t you see? Please, please open up!” he begged.

You wiped your tears and slowly opened the door. Sirius looked at you and cupped your face. He took you to your bed making you sit down.

“Marlene was drunk. I went to take some butterbeer for ourselves and she came out of nowhere and kissed me. I pushed her away as soon as I could grasp what was happening.” He gulped. “I love you. Have for a while now. Even when I didn’t know it. Loving you is like breathing, comes to me naturally and I couldn’t live without it.”

“I love you Sirius,” you said softly looking at him. You were entranced. You both were. Neither of you breaking the long stare. The feelings so long hidden bursting around you. Sirius leaned in. He kissed your forehead. Then your nose. He started peppering kisses along your cheeks, chin and jaw. His hands held you close as your heart pounded violently. He pulled away, cupping your face. He moved closer brushing his lips against yours. There was something about you that made him feel like an inexperienced nervous child dealing with his first relationship. You pressed your lips firmly against him, finally kissing him. He kissed back, fervently as if the moment would break soon and he would have to go back to the unwanted reality. You dragged your tongue against his bottom lip as he moaned and let you in. It felt like a high you never experienced. The two of you kissed passionately, neither wanting to stop. Sirius pulled away as you both heaved breathing.

“Sirius,” you said holding his hand. “Never leave me.”

“Not in a million lifetimes.” He promised.

#sirius #sirius black #sirius x reader #sirius imagine #marauders imagine #marauders x reader #harry potter imagine #harry potter #desidereta #my work #Anu writes

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nyc-uws · 3 years

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Friends

My new old friend. An odd formulation. And yet….

The Hedgehog Review Wilfred M. McClay

I hadn’t ever considered the matter until a few years ago, when I heard a dreamy little number by the jazz pianist Alan Pasqua called “My New Old Friend.” It’s a strictly instrumental affair, a subdued and contemplative piano trio, full of subtle unresolved suspensions and wafting dissonances, conveying a late-night mood of solitary and slightly bittersweet remembrance—one of those moments of quiet grace when the passage of time slows to a crawl, past and present seem to intermingle, and joy and sorrow become hard to tell apart.

But it was the song’s title that captured my attention, even more than the music itself. My new old friend. An odd formulation. But one I’d been looking for, without even knowing it.

It’s not obvious to me why I should have been looking. In a different moment, I would have been far more likely to react against the phrase, striking it down with a reflex of indignant linguistic puritanism. After all, the noble term friend has already been so diluted and cheapened in our times, like so many of our most important words of personal and social connection, that it has become like the Platte River, a mile wide and an inch deep. Such cheapening has occurred not only in our personal usage but in public discourse. When Abraham Lincoln concluded his First Inaugural Address with a heartfelt plea to the seceding Southern states to recall that “we are not enemies, but friends,” the word had great emotive power, describing the very bonds of public affection that were being sundered. Such earnest usage has all but disappeared. Friend as we now use it embraces a particularly large portfolio of evasions and line-blurring maneuvers, especially useful in the hands of diffident teenagers, as in this familiar exchange: Mother: “Who was that on the phone?” Daughter: “A friend.”

As this example illustrates, friend can designate anything from a mysterious or otherwise uncategorizable love interest to a study-group classmate to a business associate to a helpful neighbor to the “friends” who accumulate on people’s social media accounts, where they are as plentiful and enduring as the daily harvest of low-tide sea shells on a beach. The television series Friends (1994–2004) became one of the most successful sitcoms in TV history by depicting a collection of very attractive twenty- and thirtysomethings “hanging out” together as a kind of quasi-family, a light and frothy fantasy that transposed the social life of the college dorm to not-quite-adult life in implausibly toney Manhattan apartments. For its characters, friendship was that relatively flexible and easygoing state of social relations before the hardening categories of adulthood come along.

This resonated with American audiences, including aging boomers who were nostalgic for the friendships of their college days. But when we’re confronted with the far profounder ideas about friendship put forward by Aristotle, the greatest of all writers on the subject, or by C.S. Lewis in his splendid account in The Four Loves, we tend to be nonplussed. Such heights seem beyond us. For Lewis, Friends would have to be considered a show about companions, not friends, since friendship is something weightier and inherently exclusive. In this, Lewis was in tune with the earlier observations of Aristotle: “Great friendship too can only be felt towards a few people…. One cannot have with many people the friendship based on virtue and on the character of our friends themselves, and we must be content if we find even a few such.” Far from being something breezy and easy, like a glass of sparkling spring wine, friendship in the fullest sense is a rare and precious thing, much more like an old single-malt Scotch.

As I’ve said, the Platte River principle has come to apply to many of our words of human connection, perhaps partly reflecting the automatic generosity of the democratic spirit, and also the way we employ the language of false personalization in our speech, routinely appropriating the most charged words in doing so. Some of this is vaguely sinister, as when corporate bosses try to persuade us to think of ourselves as part of “the Sprocket Corporation family,” especially at times when the budget needs cutting. Community is a word that comes in for similar abuse, and has been almost emptied of meaning in this respect, standing for any aggregation that it is politically or financially useful to treat as an aggregate. Here, as in the use of the language of family and almost any other affective term, Silicon Valley has led the way to perdition.

So you can see why I would be initially averse to the idea of “new old friends,” which might sound at first like more linguistic inflation, the equivalent of preripped jeans or “distressed” furniture, something new that is made out to look old, and thus is doubly phony. To make matters worse, as my old friends can readily confirm, I have for years been prone to saying, in an earnest imitation of Shakespeare’s Polonius, that “you can always make new friends, but you can never make new old friends.” And it’s true. There is something irreplaceably special about the people who have been down the road with you—those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried—and whose friendship has endured through the sheer passage of years, through the steady artillery of time, even if such friendships lack the lively intensity of newer ones. People who “knew you when” can never be replaced, and a wise person will not seek to do so.

But such friendships have their limitations. For one thing, it’s not always helpful to be reminded constantly of who you were “then.” Life does move on. And there is also something very true in the Simon and Garfunkel song “Old Friends,” about the two men who “Sat on their park bench like bookends…. / Winter companions… / Lost in their overcoats / Waiting for the sunset…. / Memory brushes the same years / Silently sharing the same fear.” There is a bond being described, if an unutterably sad and resigned one. It is an existential bond of the deepest and most universal sort. But there are some respects in which this “old friendship” falls short of the fullness of friendship as Aristotle and Lewis describe it.

And here I come to the heart of the matter: There is no denying the phenomenon of a new old friend. I have acquired a couple of them in recent years, people with whom I have found a near-instant bond whose depth is hard to explain, whose friendship feels as old and rooted as an ancient sequoia, even though I know it is as new as a sapling. Moving about in such friendships, I’m wary at first, thinking they may be too good to be true, fearing to trust too much in the sensation of oldness, fearing, much as one fears when living in a foreign culture, that my habitual ways of being will suddenly be misperceived or strike the wrong note. There is something deeply mysterious about such friendships, and mystery induces caution, as well as awe.

But perhaps the mystery has to do with the mystery of friendship itself. Lewis remarks that what finally hold us together as friends are not the “unconcerning things,” facts of biography and shared experiences. Of course, one brings the residue of all such things to the activity of friendship. But the friendship itself stands apart from such things. It concerns itself, Lewis argues, with nothing less than a shared quest for the truth about things. In the very act of sharing in this one thing, friends gain access to an astonishing degree of freedom. “In a circle of true Friends,” Lewis insists, “each man is simply what he is: stands for nothing but himself”:

That is the kingliness of Friendship. We meet like sovereign princes of independent states, abroad, on neutral ground, freed from our contexts. This love (essentially) ignores not only our physical bodies but that whole embodiment which consists of our family, job, past and connections.

Friendship represents a rare kind of freedom, an “exquisite arbitrariness and irresponsibility,” as Lewis puts it, precisely because it liberates us into a way of being fully human that rises above all the desiderata and conditioning factors that otherwise impinge upon us, the very factors that form what we are now accustomed to call our “identity.” But why shouldn’t an entirely new friendship have that power, as much as an old one has? Or perhaps…even more, since it is no longer the facts, but rather the search, the quest, that the new old friends share?

Lewis was not alone in connecting the disinterested love of truth and goodness with the highest forms of friendship. “The real community of man,” wrote Allan Bloom in The Closing of the American Mind, “in the midst of all the self-contradictory simulacra of community, is the community of those who seek the truth, of the potential knowers, that is, in principle, of all men to the extent they desire to know.” Bloom, too, understood that the quest for truth is what unites us most deeply and most reliably. The greatness of the Great Books, in his view, was their ability to lift our minds and thoughts out of the realm of contingency and “fact,” into a realm higher and more essential, more conducive to the flourishing of friendship—not as a goal of the quest, but as a byproduct of it.

Maybe this way of phrasing it will sound too specific to the academic world. And not everyone has the time or inclination to reread Plato’s Republic every few months (preferably in Greek). But the larger truth, that the deepest friendship can take root in the sparsest biographical soil if some high and shared animating spirit is present, seems right. I’m guessing that’s how we make new old friends. Though in the end, it is a mystery.

Wilfred M. McClay is G.T. and Libby Blankenship Chair in the History of Liberty and director of the Center for the History of Liberty at the University of Oklahoma. His latest book is Land of Hope: An Invitation to the Great American Story (2019).

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/friends

#Friends

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enelea · 4 months

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Jacqueline Smith is the third main character that we will visit.

"I can't wait to meet our baby", Jaqueline said thoughtfully with a soft smile playing around her lips. Carl looked up from his tasty meal, pushing his glasses back on his nose. "And neither can I, you know it seems like just the other day we got married and here we are almost becoming parents." Jaqueline gave a chuckle, "yes it does seem like just the other day, doesn't it? But it is a day I never ever want to forget." "I remember it like it was yesterday", Carl whispered as he lovingly squeezed Jaqueline's hand. She would never grow tired of the love this man radiated whenever he looked at her. She was so happy. Perhaps it was worth going through the heartache she experienced first, before finding her soulmate. Looking back she felt so fortunate that her relationship with Adam McClarren didn't work out. He hurt her badly and it was humiliating that he chose Ivette over her, but it was for the best.

#sims 2 #sims 2 storytelling #sims-2 #sims 2 stories #sims 2 pictures #my sims #sims 2 gameplay #sims 2 screenshots #ts2 tumblr #Jaqueline and Carl Smith #old street #desiderata blooms

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feytouched · 5 years

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scent of the day #1: desiderata (alkemia)

“fresh honeysuckle blooming under a rising full moon, ivy vines, dew dampened grass, riverbed clay, old barnwood, and earthy vetivert root.”

oh, dear goodness, no thank you. rather, this is quite intriguing to my nose at first; yes, the vetivert root is there, fugaciously grassy-green and then almost immediately earthy-smoky, but behind it there’s a beautiful bucolic scenario with dry sunbathed woods and dark greenish vines that make me think of a summer i spent in the island where my mother’s side of the family comes from: rural, ancient customs marrying with the land. a very strong scent memory arises from this initial whiff, which usually makes me feel that much more attached to a scent.

but i was promised honeysuckle, and yet the floral hides so aptly under the green-smoke of the vetivert that i don’t know if i’m detecting a hint of its sweetness or imagining it! and the vetivert’s dominance only grows as the other initial aspects fade away with wear, so it is the last man standing, still as intense as it was when first applied (even seeming to be stronger!), to a nauseating extent. desiderata is not for me, but i must say that compared to the usual longevity of alkemia perfumes on my skin this one is a marathon runner, although i don’t think that makes me like it better. i’ll let it age a bit, perhaps layer it with the wild honeysuckle single note that i got from bpal and have never played around with yet, but for now i’ll give it a rest.

#perfume review #scent of the day #scents #perfume oil #indie perfume #witchblr #witchcraft #perfume magic #perfume witchcraft #beauty magic #beauty witchcraft #scent magic #scent witchcraft #ką sako lapė #alkemia #alkemia: desiderata

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riverblossom-valley · 6 months

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round 3 update - new family bios - Riverblossom edition

Viejo - Catherine and Betty have discovered the secret to a longer life - staying away from men. The two have begun a romance amongst each other and have picked up a new motto: no more wasted time. The Martin men don't seem to mind much - as long as they don't find bloomers and girdles strewn about their shared living space.

McGreggor-Shikibu - Once touted as the "rustic casanova", Leod has settled down with the town's up and coming music sensation Cleo Shikibu. What's more, the two are even expecting a little one. Will they adjust to this change in lifestyle? Or will country and rock 'n' roll cause too much chaos?

Greenman - Jason and Rose have turned their little greenhouse into a thriving nursery! Will their green thumbs cause an overgrown mass of weeds? Or will these little buds bloom into beautiful bouquets?

Roth - The Roth family is used to seeing the color green but only in the financial sense…not in this new-fangled cosmic sense. Sandra and Xander just adore their inter-stellar half-siblings but Stella can't help but find the whole thing a bit odd. How can she learn to begin accepting these two to the esteemed Roth family tree?

Wan - Patricia feels so alone in this big, empty house now that Cleo has gone off and gotten herself hitched. She could fill it up with the pitter-patter of little footsteps but motherhood seems like too much work. Oh, well, she'll have to make do with the various men she keeps pulling.

O'Mackey - Gabe thought he'd be spending the rest of his life with Patricia but she seems much too interested in the company of other married men. He'd love to just throw himself into his career only but there's also this crush he's developed on a certain red-head in Desiderata to keep him occupied. At least Jules is free from Patricia's watchful eye - she can now begin to work on her novel without having to worry about her idea being stolen.

Ottomas - The two might not have always gotten along but Samantha would be lying if she said she didn't miss having Dora's help, especially now that her oldest has moved out into a place of his own. Although she's always dreamed of a big family, this pregnancy may have to be the last until the younger members are a tad more independent.

Ramaswami - Despite being unsure at the beginnings, Priya and Sanjay feel very at home in Riverblossom Hills. They've started climbing the ladders of their respective careers and raising little Mohinder to follow his hearts desires. Is this all too good to be true? Is there something that could get in the way of this little family's happiness?

#the sims 2 #sims 2 #ts2 #riverblossom valley #riverblossom hills #round 3 #update #family bios #viejo #mcgreggor-shikibu #greenman #roth #wan #o'mackey #ottomas #ramaswami

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goddessgardener · 4 years

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Spring Forward, Car Theft, Desiderata, Medicine Makeover

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-nbihf-d69445

Spring is on the horizon. The vernal equinox is only three days away. Other than the copious dancing daffodils, nothing spells spring more than abundant camellia blooms, the eye-catching Chinese fringe shrub, and the fragrance of both freesia and hyacinth. Garden chores performed in the fall is paying dividends now. Goddess Gardener, Cynthia…

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#Health #inspiration #liter...#motivation #wellness #women #springvernal equinox desideratamedicinecabinetmakeoverpreventingtheftcartheftstealingcynthia brian be the star you are millennials to boomer

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bethestaryouareradio · 4 years

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Spring Forward, Car Theft, Desiderata, Medicine Makeover

Has your car ever been broken into? Do you know auto theft techniques that could protect your possessions? Taking precautions will keep your car from being stolen and protect your safety.

When you open your medicine cabinet, what do you see? Over-the-counter medications can ease several everyday ailments. It is a good idea to have certain medications readily on hand. It’s also good to discard any expired pills or prescriptions. Find out what to keep and what to toss.

While heeding the advice of the experts to wash our hands frequently, avoid crowds, postpone non-essential travel, stay home if we have the sniffles, what else can we do in our voluntary quarantine to stay healthy and optimistic during this emergency? Cynthia provides some ideas and also reads Desiderata that helps us through this crisis.

Listen at Voice America Network, Empowerment Channel: https://www.voiceamerica.com/episode/122405/spring-forward-car-theft-medicine-makeover

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#springvernal equinox desideratamedicinecabinetmakeoverpreventingtheftcartheftstealingcynthia brian be the star you are millennials to boomer

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