#despite u being... mean to me
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look at this motherfucker. last time she told me not to fall in. i just needed to take a shit. i hate you, spot.
#jk ily pookie#despite u being... mean to me#actually im only here for ur ocs /j#actually#change that to a hj /SRSJ LMAOOO#my timezone is still stuck on est ????#guys its actually 24 (12 am) i dont...
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wolfwood redraws (ID in alt text)
#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun#trigun maximum#tw blood#going to be talking vol 9 spoilers in here pls do not read if u have not read it!!#wolfwood my beloved. he's such a battle genius with such strong survival instincts and incentive to fight. it makes me so sad but also#it's just the way he's been able to live for as long as he has [explodes]#midvalley calling him a demon/devil (iforget which word) and livio being like “victory seems impossible” when faced against him aughhh AUGH#he's clearly not invincible - vol 8 proved that when he almost did get beat if not for vash swooping back in... but the way he carries#the battles really makes it feel like it. especially whenever he “revives” for the sake of protecting another person. i.e. him getting#back up to defeat livio - him battered and worn from the fight but then pushing his body to get up when chapel aimed at the orphanage#and then despite the blood gushing out of him he still regained cautiousness to defend razlo at the end.... ugh.... ugh.....#anyway... i love how nightow draws ww - these were fun to do. ive been meaning to do these redraws esp from vol 9/10#and maybe ill go back to do redraws from his previous fights. all and all i just need to get down how he uses the punisher properly#ruporas art
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Some process gifs of my paintings this year!
#the art of a lemon wedge#art process#man#i love painting#moat of my focus on these this year have just been committing to loosening up#vary my strokes and just not over working a painting?#most of that just means trying to keep as much of that first painting pass#since its has the biggest strokes and most energy when i lay it down#and also#NO ZOOMING IN#AHHHH#all this is painted with my seeing the entire piece and just working from big to medium then small#which is good cause u can keep track of details and what youve missed but it also feels like a huge mess for so long#at times its hard to see where ur even going#my favorite piece i think might be my otacon one#i didnt include him in here just cause that piece is like....3 layers?#it very much feels like those how to books that are like. circle. now draw the entire owl#BUT thats literally how i figured it out#1. base 2. simple clean 3. fine line detail#i do eventually want to do a full recording but the thing is#i just dont want to ......#ahaha#but i do#its just the idea of constantly being watched you know?#despite me wanting to share it....#anyways#TO NEXT YEAR#wonder what ill make#:D
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for my bestie @bangzchan ♡
#seventeen#svt#svtsource#bycarat#forbelleseyes#userzaynab#wonranglee#emification#marieblr#hanatonin#userhev#usermairin#jennalook#majatual#!melstuff#viki🥝#bestie...... idk where or how to begin to explain how much u mean to me...... but have this silly lil gifset as a way to show my love for u#thank u for sticking by me for 7 whole amazing tough sad funny but most of all lovely years#thank u for always being so patient and understanding. thank u for always listening to me and for still loving me despite me being.. me#i love u endlessly even tho ik i'm very bad at showing it sometimes. but u mean the world to me and i hope u know that!#consider this a way of me saying friendship renewed ✅ for (at least) another year!#again. thank u so so sooo much for these past 7 years and here's to (at least) 7 more years 🥂🤗🥰#also i really hope we can meet again asap bc i miss u so soooo much............ sending u virtual hugs since i can't give u a real one rn :#(and yes the scoups in the middle gif is for free ^-^ <3)
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possibly one of my favorite jean moments in tgr….his growing relationship with the trojans (as the team, not them as friends/individuals) is so so special to me
#his developing relationships w the trojans as individuals TOO ofc#tanner his little duckling…..derrick and derek….CODY my beloved..#they all mean so much to me!!! but i just mean im focusing on his relationship w The USC Trojans ykno#his respect for them and their talent and their playing style….oh jean i love u#thinking they’re good despite being Like That but then realizing they’re good Because they’re like that#and as a writing decision i love that he stayed judgy of it Until he saw it in action#just cus it would’ve felt cheap if he just suddenly started believing in their ways through their encouraging words instead of seeing the +#+ proof with his own eyes lol#anyway this is all over the place srryyy i just love jean 🙁#jean the trojan u r!!!!#jean moreau#the golden raven#tgr#tgr spoilers#the golden raven spoilers#aftg
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i love that dasein was kind of meant to be the closest thing we get to seeing the wizard in "canon" bc its like. imagine being the wizard and teaching the ''nothing'' how to ''be'' and having to watch in horror as everyone and everything around him tries to twist him into something he doesnt want to be and taking advantage of his kindness and genuine urge to help and having to be like. holy shit. this is what its like to be on the outside of all that
dasein just wants to BE in the similar way that the wizard wants to be i think. and both of them are "outsiders"—they dont well and truly belong in the spiral, and give themselves away to the detriment of their own health and sanity. so when dasein understandably gets stressed out and starts malfunctioning, thats also a reflection of the wizard
#val.txt#and i mean reflection as in this is the closest thing we'll get to seeing how the wizard ''is''#theyre kind and help out even if they get what they wanted in the end#and even despite being betrayed over and over again they never deny someone their help...#by saving him theyre also like... saving themselves u know#to me this is kind of like an eclipse tower part 2#dasein confronts the ''nightmare'' of absorbing the old one and having to see what the old one did..#the relationship differs from wizard to wizard of course and everyones canon...#but idk! thats how i generally interpreted it anyways#i think i saw people talking about this too when novus first came out#tbf though i think arc 4 kinda hamfisted it a little. the narrative was too self aware to its detriment#too many people talkin about how the wizard is sooo powerful and throwing bosses at us that are only there to show how strong the wizard is#thats why i wanna see the yw LOSE in arc 5#wizard101 spoilers#just in case
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Love this body type post SOOOO much. Thinking of this rudeass that tried to fight me how inaccurate bruces height and weight was (6’5/250lbs) in the replies of my OWN post, and how he needed MORE weight to be considered a brick house (bc they themselves were 220 and 6’2 and in their words ‘had a little bit of muscle’), then immediately ignored their own statement and got upset when i mentioned i wanted jason to be slightly taller and 40 lbs heavier. Suddenly thats TOO fat and im stupid. Fucking moron.
#chattin#the assumption that people- ESPECIALLY creators- are idiots that wont research anything is so upsetting#this fucker lives in my autistic brain RENTFREE why would i not do the research ?? why would i just make up numbers???#that reply is still so funny to me. ‘im a similar height and weight w SOME muscle so ur obviously wrong. make him bigger’#‘well heres another character that is bigger-‘ ‘u cant do that hes too fucking fat - its unhealthy’#???#what do u want from me man !#unless ur an olmypic level athlete ur thoughts dont mean shit !#theres a weightlifter thats 300+ lbs and only a couple inches taller than me!!!!#strength is so diverse and u have to me closeminded or an idiot to assume otherwise#LITERALLY my inspo for clark is shotputters/discus throwers!#bruce is a one in a million kind of endurance/strength/gymnast athlete!#dick is a whopping 50 lbs lighter than bruce despite being a couple inches shorter than him#body types MEAN something#specializing and honing ur body to do a specific thing MEANS something !#there are so many fat athletes bc! and i know this is shocking for so many people#but its bc its GOOD that they are fat! their sport DEMANDS it !#u can complain all u want but if a fat weightlifter punches u in the face u are not getting up. for ever .
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a heart to heart with the outsider
my piece for 'dunwall days', a zine celebrating 10 years of dishonored
#dishonored#corvo attano#the outsider#i'm SO EXCITED to finally be able to show my piece!!#i'm still so happy with how it turned out despite it being over a year old!#here is where i wax lyrical about dishonored bc this game means so much to me#my first ever art piece on this blog is dishonored related!!#i made it in like 2013?? 2014???#the world and the magic and the characters and the art direction are so inspirational to me thank u arkane for this series
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something that pisses me off in RA is that Flanagan will occasionally hype up Pauline as this super important and prominent figure in Will’s life, even treat her as a proxy for the mother he never knew, and yet will just refuse to show it beyond the like. two or three (personal) conversations that they have in canon. I get that he was attempting to make her an important person in Will’s life but why not do that by actually making her an important person in Will’s life
#hey Flanagan I hate to tell u but just because she’s married to Will’s father figure does not automatically make her his mom figure#what REALLY annoys me is how easy it would have been for him to connect her & will#like hey. if only there were a pretty clear gap in Will’s education that halt couldn’t fulfill - say for example mmmm diplomacy?#(cause we all know how gifted halt is at conflict resolution)#then he’d have a valid reason to seek out a master of diplomacy for lessons in negotiating compromises & treaties#but no I guess not. Will’s just naturally good at diplomacy despite never really being exposed to it#yk what extra sucks?#if Pauline HAD taught will about treaties & stuff then him receiving the last name treaty wouldve been 1000x more meaningful#it would’ve spoken to her influence on him and solidified her as a sort of parental figure in her own right#AND as an extra extra bonus: if she came to the cabin to teach will about negotiation tactics and such#then we could’ve gotten more halt/Pauline interactions. as in: we could’ve actually seen them being in love ON SCREEN instead of just being#told that they loved each other#will could’ve had a chance to see how much the two of them mean to each other. and then he would’ve had some actual basis for a speech#at their wedding or whatever#but yeah no why do that when we can just imply that will & Pauline got super close off screen? same effect right?????#ranger’s apprentice#pauline dulacy#halt o’carrick#will treaty#I love these books so so much don’t get me wrong. but there are just some things……#anyway.#jackie rambles
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Im literally having an evil cackle moment right now scrolling thru the lauriam tag on my blog and seeing how the story developments shifted general opinion of him
#my mind is full of lauriam/marluxia these past couple of weeks#when u have a favorite character that means you stare at them A LOT#the smallest details. every minute action. analysis mode is constantly on#i saw the hints!!! i followed the clues. i read the theories and wrote some myself!!!#lol I feel like an old person still mentioning my hunch about lauriam being a good guy gaining a vindicated status when khux was updating#I don’t think I’ll ever be tired of that satisfaction quite frankly#the big doubtful and scornful sentiment the general fandom had about him was PRETTY overwhelming and it did place some skepticism in me#which tbf is necessary to have following this series#but still despite all that HA I TOLD YALL LAURIAM WAS A KIND PERSON I KNEW IT ‘sure ok jen let's get you to bed’#kh union cross released about 7 years ago. this was a while ago 🫠#some of the experience is just...you had to be there 😭#click clack#khux#χ♡
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attack on @miniimoose's blip :D a very silly one... ive got a fondness for disaster irkens with unattainable crushes on their bosses that they HATE...
#its ESPECIALLY fun seeing flipp and blip's different “attitudes” about it despite being very similar#blip means so much to me he's such a mess beyond his competence as a navigator#LOVE HIM... <3 <3 THANK U FOR THE KIND WORDS MINIMOOSE#ph_art#phoc_flipp#ph_skssshbbq#ph_iz#af 2024
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i think i should be allowed to simply not have moral ocd
#honestly i think the moral ocd can be worse than even the like... existential stuff which is saying smth for me...#im all good but i think i just did what would qualify as 1-2 straight hours of compulsions actually#its so convoluted i need to watch a dumb video. maybe think about her#i think morality is just a theme that feels like it most swiftly erodes away at u compared to some others...#at least for me and the way it presents for me#whateverrrrrrrr. i need to do smth fun#at aa level of sleepy where i feel disoriented somehow despite the fact that i dont think i should be so tired. it IS five though#didnt mean to stay up so late i was already tired but. gestures. the compulsions#...esp since the compulsions resulted in a genuinely a little important thing for me to find#this wont feed into or reinforce anything im sure#i neeeed my escitalopram and abilify back soooo bad.... missing them 💔#and concerta but thats less relevant to what im talking about atm#sorry for a sorta negative type of post i try to minimize like... being all mopey on my tumblr#but it is what it is sometimes
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PETEY LORE!!!!!!!!! according to some of gary’s cut dialogue, pete was born out of wedlock and implied to have separated parents. they could also still be together and just umarried, or have since gotten married after he was born, but gary implies he’s sensitive about it so it’s more likely that they are not together and possibly not on good terms.
assuming this lore hasn’t been completely nullified since its removal and could still reasonably be considered canon, it adds a little more context to his chronic loneliness issues and validation seeking, especially when considering he’s also an only child. if he only ever lived with one parent at a time, didn’t have any other siblings or friends, and was thrown into boarding school as soon as possible, it’s reasonable to assume he didn’t get a lot of attention in early childhood which now manifests as insecurity, clinginess, and fear of rejection/loneliness. peter kowalski i know what you are (mentally ill)
(source)
#sorry didnt mean to pathologize him like that#it just rlly puts his whole… situation into perspective#yknow the whole ‘ill put up with any amount of mistreatment as long as you give me even a little bit of attention and pretend u like me’#and i feel like we know so little about him despite him being a main??? like less than is typical for this game#hes unreasonably mysterious. like i have to crack him open and see what the fuck is wrong with him for myself#literally talk to me about him any time i am ALWAYS trying to psychoanalyze his little anxious shelter dog ass#text#image#link#mine#pete kowalski#bully scholarship edition#canis canem edit#bully game#bully cce#cce#bully se
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the most iconic photoshoot ever
#the clikkma vibes are sooo strong in this one#we were girls together#the way emma has her arm around cleo and her hand on rikki’s GIRL I SEE U#it’s so funny to me how in all of the promotional shoots emma is always the most touchy. despite being a sorta ‘refined’ person she would#absolutely be the most touchy#that’s how she gets away with her raging lesbianism bc no one suspects#h2o just add water#rikki chadwick#emma gilbert#cleo sertori#rikma#clemma#2000s nostalgia#ok i didn’t know what word to use i was gonna say uptight but that’s too mean. sorta cold/rigid ahh you guys know what I mean
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save me asian ocs.. save me...
#out of.#working on inbox i swear. and now that ive justified my lack of content on my own blog heres my tag ramble:#SAVEEE ME ASIAN OCS SAAVEEEEE MEEEE#i love u guyus.. so mcuh. i kiss every asian oc my mutuals have because they are so dear to me#and i know when its like.. idk in a fantasy/mythological/sci fi verse ethnicity just isnt brought up but its still so important to me#and its also why i have so many (se)asian muses tew...#especially if ur character is one that deliberately breaks the mold so many inevitably fall into (by white/unaware writers)#and double especially if its BROWN ASIANS yall are fighting the good fight. in this economy???#trust that i will always talk about the impact of ethnicity OCs have despite it not being a focal point in most threads#bc its still really prevalent imo !!#let it be said i am a large hater of k/rp or fetishization of that sort & i hope i have a good eye on spotting that shit...#i know every and all asian (original) characters are safe in my moots hands u mean sm to me#sometimes i go thru ur guys carrds and just read ur bios again 'FUCK THIS IS GOOD & RESPECTED' i eat it up all the time. know this..#i kiss u all MWAH#i got so emotional thinking about miss josephine and mahariel and lavellan......[i continue to list all my asian characters]
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the complete eri guidebook (2023) full version under the cut ♡ pdf ver. happy birthday @xiaojuun !! <3
credits. with the help of: meg (@hozierbyrne) // brina (@aquablues) // aléks (@possession1981) // vianey (@souladies) // lili (@ninqz) // aweks (@awek-s) // miha (@jaebeomtual) // rachel (@gnanii) // mare (@dongkwan) // ro (@sunghanbin) // rosie (@kimjiwoong) // lulu (@fushigojos) // sofi (@yukuz) graphics: gift boxes // broccoli // orange fruit watercolor // lip print textures // notion-style scribbles // healthcare vector icons // human anatomy icons // film cutouts pack // 3d travel icons // drinks vector icon set // coffee outline illustration pack // baby vector icon pack
#*mine#oorieri#genuinely thank you SO MUCH for participating @ everyone who did . and if i didn't contact u ... im so sorry i probably didnt fully realize#that u were friends with eri um . sowwie#thank you for finding the time to think about this and . for those who did . for sending in your answers i lob u this is only possible beca#because so many people agreed to help...#a note to meg!! specifically!! because you did so much (from being my first interviewee and my lab rat to responding to the few questions i#had . to suggesting people to include and offering your help with contacting some people (although it did not work out in the end as i said#i really appreciated the thought!!)#note for meg (2): i ended up not being able to use indesign at all... it was too big for my poor little tablet skjsk i got rlly excited abt#n downloaded it strategically for the free trial to expire today or tomorrow but. had to uninstall right away... sighs)#special thanks to lili for being so sweet . i think we became a bit closer through the messages we exchanged in between this project <3#special thanks to rachel and mare who i know are both really good friends with eri but who aren't exactly familiar with me... i was really#nervous messaging you both so thank you for being so sweet and for participating despite life not exactly helping!!#note for rachel: im sorry i ended up casually calling you rachie in my head the past month or so .. forgive me#special thanks to lulu for being willing to participate#a big thank you to everyone for opening up#and thank you to gabi and sarah who did try their best to find the means to participate#big thank you to gimp for crashing so many times while i was making this & to myself for overriding one of the most important files acciden#accidentally. good job#and finally. the BIGGEST thank you to OUR BELOVED ERI who. clearly. is just the biggest sweetest sunshine & the bestest friend to all of us#thank you for everything always ... i hope you're sleeping well by now#and of course: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! i truly wish you all the best today. and this month. and the next year and the next one and the next one an#i love you. <3 i really do#and so does everyone! clearly!!
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