#do we remember webkinz?

[livwritesstuff]

Robin’s favorite part of Steve becoming a dad (and there really are so many to choose from) is getting to hear about all the ways his kids are learning how to push his buttons (as they absolutely should – Steve wouldn’t truly be a dad if he wasn’t being driven half-insane by their ridiculous antics).

“What are your children up to today, Steve-o?” she asked during a routine phone call.

And Steve replied, “Well, Moe spent half the night in time-out for fucking walloping Robbie with a hardcover picture book.”

“Why?” Robin snorts.

“Never figured it out, but later when we made Moe apologize, she said Sorry for hitting you with a book – which, you know, fine, she could have stopped there, but then she said If you just do what I say, I’ll never have to hit you with a book again.”

“Jesus, she’s like a fuckin’ mobster.”

“Tell me about it.”

Another time, Steve told her, “I think I lost the battle with Hazel’s hair.”

Robin made a sympathetic noise, because she was very aware of Steve’s ongoing crusade to manage Hazel’s unmanageable curls (they're actually pretty manageable, from what Robin has heard, the problem is just that Hazel won't let him).

“This morning I told her we needed to brush it before school and I think her exact response was Don’t people want to see the real me?”

Robin laughs, “Oh man, she’s so cute.”

“Don’t worry – she knows.”

One of Robin’s favorite updates is when Steve tells her, “We had to figure out how to address Robbie breaking into Moe’s fucking Webkinz account and spending all her fake money on gifts for herself,” and Robin can’t help a gasp, because she’s heard all about this Webkinz craze and just how big a deal it is to elementary-schoolers like Steve and Eddie’s oldest daughters.

“Holy shit, she’s diabolical.”

“Yeah. I mean, Moe probably could have picked a better password than password. Kinda thought she was smarter than that, actually, but…lesson learned, I guess.”

[femme-malewife]

I got an ad for wizard101 and I feel...a wave of nostalgia

[oftlunarialmoon]

Online Games for Age Regression - Free to Play Internet Games for Agere on a Budget

Ciao lovelies! Today’s blog post topic was requested by Bee via our request form! I am working my way through the others, thank you all for your suggestions so far! Today I’ll be sharing a collection of links I’ve found to online games you can play for free! A lot of age regressors are out here on a budget after all, and not all of us can afford to buy new games all the time. But playing our same old games can be boring after a while. Luckily with the ideas below, you can have plenty of free online games to try the next time you are small and bored! Alright, let’s dive into this list!

I want to begin the list with Educational Game sites. These will have a learning component in the games, as they’re intended to help teach kiddos cool new facts about the world! On this section we have:

Educational Games:

Cool Math Games https://www.coolmathgames.com/

USA Mint (currency) Learning Games https://www.usmint.gov/learn/kids/games

Math Playground https://www.mathplayground.com/

NASA Kids Club https://www.nasa.gov/learning-resources/nasa-kids-club/

National Geographic Kids https://kids.nationalgeographic.com/games

Animal Jam https://www.animaljam.com/en

ABCya! Learning Games https://www.abcya.com/

The next section I’ll go into are game sites based on tv, like shows or networks specifically.

Television Games:

Nick Jr https://www.nickjr.com/games

Nickelodeon https://www.nick.com/games

Disney https://disneynow.com/all-games

PBS https://pbskids.org/games

Cartoon Network https://www.cartoonnetworkhq.com/games

Boomerang TV https://www.boomerangtv.co.uk/games

Sesame Street https://www.sesamestreet.org/games

This next section is my favorite, and I’m sure tons of you will realize exactly why, and maybe you’ll have similar nostalgic memories. But let me lay out the scene here. Picture this, you’re in your room/computer room and it's friday night, you’ve just had pizza for dinner, Rihanna is playing on the radio and you’re about to do your favorite activity- dress up games! So nostalgic…

Dress Up Game Sites:

Doll Divine https://www.dolldivine.com/

Azaelea’s Dolls https://www.azaleasdolls.com/

Girls Go Games https://www.girlsgogames.com/

Picrew https://picrew.me/

Pastel Katto https://pastelkattogames.com/

Girl Games https://www.girlgames.com/

Dress Up Games https://www.dressupgames.com/

Meiker https://meiker.io/

eGirl Games https://www.egirlgames.net/

Dress Up https://www.dressup.com/

Lastly, here’s some more online games that I couldn’t figure out a special category for:

Unsorted:

Webkinz https://www.webkinz.com/

Chess Kid https://www.chesskid.com/

Poptropica https://www.poptropica.com/haxe/play/

Kidpix https://kidpix.app/

Webkinz Guide https://webkinzguide.com/wiki/Main_Page

Sanrio Daily https://www.sanrio.co.jp/dailyapps/

CBC Kids https://www.cbc.ca/kids/games

Landing https://app.landing.space/@kasaimoonfox

Wordle https://www.nytimes.com/games/wordle/index.html

I hope you found some new games today! Thank you again to Bee for suggesting this idea!

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Thanks again for reading, please remember to stay awesome and love yourself!

[yeoldwebkinzcollector]

I find it fitting the first webkinz i post should be the first webkinz i ever got! This is Stripepinkwhiskers the striped alley cat and i've had her for about 14 years now (oh man do i feel old) but i remember getting her like it was yesterday

It was my grandma and cousins who introduced me to webkinz (they had already been playing for awhile at that point). While we were visiting my grandma pulled out a handful of webkinz saying we each could pick whichever one we wanted. I immediately went for the alley cat and they spent the rest of the afternoon showing me webkinz world. It's still one of my fondest childhood memories

the reason for her, admittedly, strange name was very straightforward for me; Stripe because she had stripes, pink because of her pink nose, and whiskers because of her cute little whiskers (in retrospect, a very autistic moment on my part). However webkinz world had a character limit, so i spelt it somewhere along the lines of "Stripinkwhskr"

[crustycantankerousgrownup]

Imma let y'all in on a stroke of millennial parenting genius that probably won't work today, but I recognize as supremely impressive in hindsight.

If you don't know/remember, Webkinz is/was a brand of plushies that you could buy at the Hallmark store and register online to take care of and play computer games with. They were kind of like a superior competitor to Neopets. If you had a Webkinz account, you had to buy and register a new Webkinz plushie every year or so to keep your account active.

When I was a kid, I had a friend who was really into Webkinz. Like, she had a bed worth of surface area devoted to excess Webkinz that were unregistered so she could renew her account on a moment's notice. I don't know where she got them-- could have been from family and friends as gifts, could have been all she spent her allowance on. Point is, she spent a lot of time playing computer games, and when I went over to her house, that was most of what we bonded over.

Her dad was also kinda technologically savvy-- I think it was part of his job. I don't even think this was that hard to do at the time, but he had the TV set up to act as the monitor for their family's desktop computer. Like, it was a huge TV, so their family computer basically had a comically large monitor.

We thought this was the coolest thing ever, and the most "secretive" thing we ever did on the computer at that age was type in our Webkinz password. We didn't think anything of the fact that her parents could sit behind us on the couch, or see the TV from the kitchen, and monitor what we were doing online as though they were sitting on a bench at the playground.

We got to obliviously live our rich-kid-magic-tech dreams and play our computer games, and they got peace of mind knowing that we weren't being exposed to porn or animal torture while on the internet.

I so hope that this will work on gen-alpha kids by the time I have them because it is not the internet's job to be kid-friendly. It's its job to be organized with kid-friendly spaces, but I think being able to monitor kids' play during screen time the way you monitor them during outdoor play is a no-brainer.

[webkinztournament]

just found this blog and HI HELLO???? I STARTED A QUEST ON MAKING EVERY WEBKINZ INTO AN OC LIKE LAST YEAR AND I DON'T OWN THEM ALL ON TOP OF MANY BEING GIVEN AWAY BECAUSE I WAS A CHILD WHO DIDN'T KNOW HOW IMPORTANT THOSE STUFFIES WERE!!!! wanted to get some Tumblr Pros who I'm sure owed some webkinz before to see if they could help out with how they played with their own webkinz,

I was HORRIBLY consistent (my whimsical dragon webkinz dated/married most if not ALL the guy dragons my older sibling owned who were also webkinz; she's settled down now with a Very Pretty Splash Dragon who was her bestie since Getting) so I was wondering if they might be able to share their webkinz childhood- or just silly gameplay from their childhood- for this oddness?/nfaa

(I have a LIST so far on everything and dynamics but I know my older sibling and I did NOT have enough to cover everything until 2015 when we stopped seeing them in Cracker Barrel, but I can recognize that I do NOT have 1000% brain power to cover making everyone as fully fledged as I would have as a child locked up in my bedroom playing with the stuffies without anyone else to assist the cotton candy bunny trying to convince jelly bean puppy and cherry soda puppy that they needed to maim the pink horse.)

I meant to respond to this and then I forgor. I'm trying to give my Webkinz more personality now as an adult, and it is a struggle even though I still have them all. I probably give my Webkinz 1000x more love and appreciation as an adult then I did as a kid, online game included. As a child, I played with my Webkinz plushes here and there, but I never developed strong personalities or storylines for them, or any of my plushes for that matter. I had many unnamed stuffed animals. All of my brain power for that got dedicated to my Littlest Pet Shop toys in a similar way to your Webkinz, albeit in a less violent way.

I had over 80 LPS animals and I used to remember all of their names, and most of them had personalities, some had jobs, adopted kids, had their own wallets and handmade cash, storage spaces rented under their names, and some had entire families and marriages. They would go through things like lawsuits, divorce, opening a family business, putting on plays, and so on. I think the absolute peak of their lore was when the king of the kingdom, King Fluffy the Hamster, divorced Queen Booker the Scottish terrier (owned by my sister) when my sister moved out of my bedroom into her own. He then remarried a supermodel cat named Princess. This made my younger sister unreasonably angry.

[msponies]

What the shit did you smoke for you to make this blog inactive!?

okay this is a little fun a little sassy silly…… i dig it i vibe….. i’m currently at my grandparents house taking my dog out so i think it’s a good time to go through my past ~14 months and together we can see where i fell off the wagon (SLASH GEN i promise i’m not being snarky! i really do want you all who have supported me to know i’m okay + what i’ve been up to)

it’ll be under the cut, and as a thank you to all of you,

oh yeah. ohhhhhhhh yeah

july 2021: artfight happens, i do two attacks and then just stop drawing ANYTHING. i started sewing again briefly which was the second crafty hobby i had before drawing (first was origami!), so that eats up my time. if i remember i want to edit this when i’m home and add a picture from my old phone of me sitting on my bed with my cats, sewing a “sock creature” (PLEASE please if you have the time look up john murphy’s sock creatures, his first book was so formative to me)

august 21: i start working at spirit halloween!!

september 21: i become close friends with this guy Vincent, we had known of each other for a while and were mutual fans of each other’s art but here we start talking on a daily basis!!!

october 21: obviously The Big One for a spirit employee, it was halloween all month baby! i had three costumes (the third was Raph from tmnt but i don’t have a pic 😿)

(side note i LOVE the turtles, the reason i got that black wig in the goth cat costume was to cosplay casey jones from tmnt2012)

november 21: by the nature of spirit halloween i am now unemployed. i try hbwr seeds for the first time which to answer the original question is most likely what i smoked to make this blog inactive

december 21: I BREAK UP WITH MY EX!!!! i found his secret pr0$h!p twitter on christmas eve so i timed pretty much the exact midpoint between christmas and new years and broke it off then

january 22: i reorganize my life!! i get a new bed frame and other furniture for my room to celebrate my fresh start. i find a very rudimentary children’s sewing machine at goodwill and get fully back into making sock creatures!!!! plus i hack a 3ds, but i know we’re all doing that

february 22: this is where i really do just become burned out for a bit, i do JACK SQUAT except make a G2 Tier Maker:

march 22: i start taking job hunting seriously… ALSO me and Vinnie who i mentioned back in september keep talking and keep growing closer; i send him a playlist of songs that make me think of our ponysonas and for the first time it becomes really clear to each of us how much we like one another 💥 the playlist in question:

april 22: i turn 24! i also start working at taco bell. i also stop working at taco bell. i watch a good chunk of pac man and the ghostly adventures

may 22: probably my favorite month of the year thus far! i journal every day, go to the park, work hard around the house and in general do what feels gratifying to me!

june 22: i go to a pride event in my city and run into a girl who i bought a teddy bear purse from at spirit! she mentions applying at the McAlister’s that’s opening next month and i follow suit; it goes poifectly and my training starts at the beginning of…

july 22: DELI TIME! i’m trained to work prep which means folding up all the meat that gets used for sandwiches, plus slicing n dicing various produce. Vincent and I are like 💓official💓 at this point or whatever….. :)

august 22: i adjust to life behind the industrial-grade rotary slicer. i get back DEEP into webkinz. Vincent and i meet up for the first time!!!!!!!!!!!!!

september 22: loooots more boyfriend time 🎉 but also i go back to school 👎

now: well damn! i’m in a little bit of a rut in full honesty; i only have so much energy in a given day and i spend most of it on work and school. i am so grateful for everyone who has shown me patience, and i want to prove that it wasn’t “wasted” on me in any way. i still have a lot of personal work to do before i can post on a reliable schedule again

thank you :)

[letterstomonkey]

A Letter from Your Monkey

I am made of spices just like you, Dad

I bring your dirty laundry downstairs

and I walk behind you

Locking eyes with your left leg limping

You taught me how to read time

You asked me what time it was

Watching 60 minutes and the Andy Griffith show every night

Mom got upset when I slept in your bed

But I like to wake up to your snoring

Because I need to know you are alive sometimes

Your humanity escaped me for many years

The world painted you a monster

I painted you my handprint

On a blue oven mitt at preschool for Father's Day

You keep it in the kitchen of your one story house

Where you wake up alone

and you speak another language

I can not read it but I try to read you

I read between the lines of your forehead wrinkles and receding hairline

I read between the lines of of every car you crashed

Pistachio shells

Your black leather jacket

And the way You were more gentle with my body

Than my mother was

And I noticed that

I remember that

Your belt you never used against me

You held my humanity over my head

You came from another world

You named me after your biggest blessings

A big tub of rice on the floor of the pantry

And your twelve year old shoes in the laundry room

Your cologne carries over to my hesitance to wear mascara

And your disappointment lays a hand on my shoulder

in every photo where I smile without my teeth

Daddy, you are a reckless driver

Yet you buckle my stuffed animal in the backseat beside me

I stayed up reading books every night waiting for you to come home at ten, eleven, twelve, or sometimes never o'clock

I liked to be awake with you alone

I hid from you before you left for work in the mornings

I have ears like you

My chin stays raised, and stubborn like you

I am ten o'clock at night

I became the leg you shifted your weight on

And I pulled the crutch out from under you

Inside the Mecklenburg County courtroom

Your lawyers and your layovers

The color green of our family

You told me one day I would wear a green wedding dress

Like your sisters, like my Daddy's sisters

You would walk me down the aisle

You would be there and be able to walk

You taught me how to tell time

You taught me how to use these legs

To run as far away as they would take me

Only if I made it home for dinner

And you brought leftovers to Rick and Kathy across the street

They did not need food

But you had to give everything away

It is what you know how to do

You use your voice like a wooden cutting board

Letting sharper shrieking siblings and moms leave their mark

They grew more dull

You are as you always have been

I loved you in great expectations

I lost you in great expectations

I color your skin in orange crayon

My Daddy has orange skin and they don't make the right color for it

My Daddy is a broken violin

A piano that has not been tuned in thirty years

But you open the top

And dust swirls into the air

Making its presence known three doors down

You make your presence known all the way to the end of the street

You hand me dollar bills to save in an empty pretzel jar

You keep Klondike bars in bulk in our freezer

and you eat my leftovers in the fridge but you don't tell me that

I don't ask you either

I recall you getting ready for work

I used to play Webkinz on your laptop

and made my own rules for one player chess

And you hid everything

I learned to be so good at hiding things

Hiding myself

Hiding from you

I keep coming home,

Something about burning charcoal

Something about growing tomatoes in the garden that will stay with me forever

When I haven't eaten in days

My stomach still accepts tomatoes, raw

Bitten into like forbidden fruit from the garden of Parviz

Forbidden footsteps on the front steps

The puppy gate at the bottom of the stairs that you broke

I'm sorry for not understanding how much more difficult we made it for you to walk up the stairs

I slide down the railing

I sit outside your bedroom at night

Careful not to wake anybody

But I listen to your wheezing snoring stirring

Until my stomach turns slower

Still sifting through you at nineteen

I am still sifting through your sins

I am still cutting up my legs on the brick fireplace

And leaving notes for Santa on the mantle

And sinking into the sofa where you left indentations

I am still at the bus stop at the end of the driveway

Watching you walking outside to get the mail in your boxers and stained white t-shirt

And I am turning redder than the tomatoes you grew in the garden

And I am fuming shades of saffron and cumin

I'm wondering what you see in me

I'm never on the same page as you but

I have a million paper cuts from searching for you

I hide my phone from you when you enter the room

Deleting flip phone text messages as quickly as I can

And by the time your footstep crescendo creaks into my doorway

I am sitting on both of my hands

And I realize I left the big light on a couple hours too late at night

Oh, I am torn, torn, torn

Lord, I pray for my tongue

To speak in solidarity with my father's

I pray for the provision of speech to bring this house to its knees

I pop balloons

when it is too quiet in my mind

The sound of sudden endings is familiarity

I have been grieving you since I laid eyes on you

And you have been picking up the pieces of your presence since the beginning of time

You taught me the hands of time

The little one is for seconds and she is quick, like me when I scored three goals in one game and you were so proud of me

The short hand tells the hours

He is slow and stubborn but stable and You are the hours

And the minute hand is impatient, always butting heads with the other ones, confusing me, not enough of its own thing to stand alone

My mother

My third grade teacher got mad at me for throwing food across the lunch table

and I started crying about my Dad

I told her I had not seen you in so long

And why were you gone when I needed you

I didn't really need a dad

But how I could I forget you once introduced

How could I fill the hole where you told me I was Your pride and Your joy

How could I grow up in the same house where you forbid me from letting go of catching fireflies

And eating dinner at Cici's pizza

And blockbuster movie rentals

And the three stooges

I am still learning how to tell time

How to speak with a softer tongue

But a heartier throat

A less fearful laugh

A genuine generosity that knows not withholding of love and forgiveness and beautiful beautiful beautiful beautiful forgetfulness

I am still remembering something

60 minutes til the clock strikes midnight

6 years old when the nightmares took over

I will let mom excavate the bones of me

When the morning light tells her to rescue me

I let her blanket me in guilt ridden goosebumps

Knowing I needed rescuing at midnight

and my Daddy was the one to save me

And it is the least I could do to sleep next to him

I needed to know that you are still alive

Sometimes in my nightmares you are not

Your humanity escaped me for many years

When you were home I covered up my ears

If every other voice in the world is a knife

You were born a wooden cutting board

Absorbing the damage

Taking hits like a champion

You are as you always have been

Your garden, you grew me

Your garden, you showed me

Tomatoes can't grow red without green

I wear a watch on my middle finger of my left hand

I've been learning how time works since I was eight

I see you in the steady hour hand

How could I ever be anything but Your pride and Your joy

How could I grow up in the same place you forbid me from letting go of catching fireflies

The sound of sudden endings reminds me of you

I've been grieving you since I was a child

I've been grieving you since I learned of death

I've been grieving you since I made a friend

With death and all his passive compliments

I pray for provision of speech to bring this house to its knees

The sound of sudden endings is my family, my childhood street

I will never forgive myself for the years I can't get back

I love you past the meaning of life

Life and death knows not the love for my Dad

I miss you like a hurricane aftermath

You've been picking up the pieces of your presence since the beginning of time

[taylovelinus]

Got tagged by @webkinz-queen hehe thank you!!!!

Rules: Shuffle your likes or your favorite playlist and post the first ten tracks, then tag people

West Coast by Lana Del Rey

The Rain by Knocked Loose

No 1. Party Anthem by Arctic Monkeys

Damned If I Do Ya by All Time Low

1cm by Lovelyz

Thank You For The Venom by My Chemical Romance

When You Were Young by The Killers

Rainbow Rain by C-ute

When Was the Last Time we Painted over the Blood on the Walls by City of Caterpillar

Remember by Greeley Estates

I tag @gruncheon @saintofbrokenhearts @researchgate @partywizard @marjoriewcsinclair @sportsbianism ☆ ☆ ☆

[drkoestersmithrpg]

Celebratory cup of coffee.

So one of the things I do at my outdoor altar is leave items on the east/south/west/north side of the oak tree, usually during the full moon, but also for eclipses, holidays, etc. Usually candles or water. There's a prayer that goes with it, about "drinking up the moonlight, learning the lesson and bringing it to me" but sometimes I just dump stuff in certain places and call it good. I do this at almost every full moon, so I always have candles or water that are charged for air/fire/water and earth.

And for the past two years I've had a yearlong supply of Pumpkin Spice coffee (due to buying it all up in season, and occasionally buying it online) so that goes out too.

So, on the last full moon, I picked out 15 kcups of coffee, regular, super-cafinated, Gingerbread and Pumpkin Spice, and did a special charging spell over them so they would be a countdown - the 3 weeks before Spring Break. These were SPECIAL 3 weeks, because these were 3 FULL weeks - 5 days each - that I would be teaching. (3 full 5-day weeks of school is a rare thing, because in OKC we have a LOT of non-school days throughout the year. No idea why. Also I deliberately schedule drs apts and mental health days during 5 day weeks.)

So the PLAN was that, every day of those 3 weeks, I would reach in the special spell cabinate I used for this spell, and pull out one kcup of charged coffee for that morning. Whatever I pulled out would be a sufficient blessing for that day. And, as the amount got smaller and smaller, I would remember that I only had that many days to survive before my break.

But I must have miscounted, because when the last day happened yesterday, there was on more cup left. I decided that was my Celebratory Cup Of Coffee.

And here I am, playing webkinz and perusing Tumblr, enjoying my Final Cup of Pumpkin Spice coffee.

I deserve it.

[jellyfishinajamjar]

Tau units that I think would be baller as hell please hire me James Workshop

The Tau, despite having been around for longer than the iPod mini, Webkinz, and the scramjet engine, have a strangely truncated model line. This is partially attributable to unique deficiencies in the army’s intended method of play, but nonetheless do exist. I want to fill those gaps and make Tau cool as fuck. Here’s some ideas

Plenty of armies in 40K have a simple ‘one army, three sub-armies’ make up. For example, the Drukari have the wonderfully alliterative and easy to remember Cabals, Covens, and Cults, each taking an aspect of dark eldar philosophy and filling a role in the larger army. Cabals are your boats and baddies playstyle, Covens having twisted abominations, and Cults do something that I would know about if I was a Drukari player

Necron have Dynasties, Flayers, and Destroyer Cults, with flayers filling fast attack roles and destroyers being self evident

Tau have 1 and a halfish sub-armies. You’ve got the Tau, who do shooting, Kroot, who do fast attack and some melee, and a Vespid, who have one unit. Clearly, something went wrong here. Why do we have two fast attack sub-armies despite having fine fast attack in our main army? Why do we have Kroot as bad at shooting and at melee? Why don’t Vespid exist?

I want to fix this. To do so I’m going to propose a frankly radical solution GW would never do, but I want to see anyways. Give us five sub-armies

We’ve already got Tau, Kroot, and Vespid. I’m not changing any already existing model lines, cause that’ll never happen. Instead, I’m going to round off incomplete lines and introduce a few new ones

Tau. Tau are fine as is. I’d love to see melee battlesuits, but this isn’t the place for more sword mech propaganda. Tau having gaps in their line is the whole point of having auxiliaries, so it’s fine

If I might make a personal request, I would love to see burst cannon equipped infantry. Not all of them, maybe like one in 10 strike warriors could replace their pulse rifle with a burst cannon, or have a wargear option to replace the sms on the support turret with a burst cannon. Trade indirect fire for direct anti infantry. That would be especially useful in boarding action, and not having the turret is a hit to fire warrior’s strength there

Kroot. Kroot are the second healthiest Tau Empire model line by virtue of being the one that actually exists. I think it’s good as is. I have two suggestions here, mostly for my own desire to see Kroot fuck. Give us big Kroot and enormous Kroot.

I want a Kroot melee elite unit. Elite both in unit designation and like Elites from Halo. Gimmie big beefy boys in a 3-6 unit that absolutely slaughter in melee. These will be our melee heavy hitters, our line holders, our brick shithouse with arm swords made of bone and chitin. Like a Kroot ate a space marine and got jacked. Size of a terminator big. These guys should have baller models and fill a much needed gap in the Tau as immovable objects you can park on objectives and laugh as your opponent tries to melee you off.

The other Kroot unit I would want is a dinosaur. Look, James, if you aren’t going to give us exodites at least let our Kroot be dinosaurs. I’m thinking a Knight equivalent, melee focus with big tau guns mounted on it, like that one tau’nar kitbash with the t-rex body and the tau’nar arms. Give use dinos.

And lastly for Kroot, we don’t need it but I think it would be funny lookin as hell, so I’ll mention it. Kroot flyers. They’re already lizard birds, I want to see a Kroot plane equivalent. Like a pterodactyl with a Kroot face and a Shaper on its back holding a pair of reins. Give it transport capacity so it can drop off Kroot or Krootox, or like if it overflies and enemy it can make a claw attack and if it hits it picks up a model or two and eats them to recover wounds. Just be wild with it. It’ll never see competitive play outside of Kroot only lists, but it’ll be a cool looking shelf piece and will give more for the three exodite diehards to kitbash so they don’t go insane waiting for official confirmation that they exist.

Vespid. Of the existing lines, Vespid definitely need the most work. They’re supposed to fill a fast attack role in an army that already has two fast attack infantry units. Here’s some ideas to start us off on a decently well rounded sub-army.

Vespid tank equivalent. I think we should keep with the wasp ascetic, and make a vespid tank. Big ol honeycomb on hover engines, stinger looking gun on top, that sort of thing. We’ve already got IFV and light tank roles filled by the devilfish and hammerhead respectively, so this will be our medium to heavy tank. Our Rougle Dorn equivalent. Slow, heavy hitting, tons of staying power, but weak to melee, so you can counter by rushing it. It’s not going to be taking points by itself, and you’ll want to screen with vespid to keep it safe. Anti infantry guns, big gun on top, with an alt build as a transport for Vespid. Give it some kind of energy shield to take hits and you’re golden.

Vespid shaper equivalent. Make it some kind of vespid queen or princess or something, an hq choice you would only ever use with vespid. Buffs vespid, maybe some pusdo-psychic abilities if you’re feeling generous.

Vespid melee equivalent to the current model line. Can even be one of those ‘one box, but you can build it two ways!’ things, like how the fire warrior box builds a strike team or a breacher team. Cheap trade pieces you throw at your enemies infantry to soften them up. I’m thinking some kind of stinger spear, hits once then you get shot and die for that bee experience. Maybe for every wound you do to the enemy unit, they’re moral test is worsened by one, cause the poison makes em want to run away and die. Moral tests aren’t really around in 10th, so maybe something like reducing oc on units they wound, so they’re really good at weakening enemies holding points but have like OC 0 so they’re never gonna hold it by themselves, they need other vespid to push up behind them and hold

And now, we’re truly in uncharted waters. No existing GW model lines to guide us. These last two sub-armies are going to be less standardized, and I think somewhat smaller

Gue’vesa. Was there ever any question? It’s like the most famous auxiliary, with no official table rep. Give us literally anything. IG units with an upgrade sprue, upgrade sprues for fire warriors with human legs and heads, rules for proxing in IG units wholesale, I’ll take anything. Hell, even just confirmation you can have humans in regular fire caste units, anything.

If we’re going to have a dedicated gue’vesa sub-army however, it can’t just be IG but in Tau colors. It needs its own flavor. I’d actually prefer human auxiliaries get absorbed into other castes rather than making a new one just because humans don’t have a designated shtick. But that’s just my preference. And I’m doing it anyways, so you can’t stop me.

And lastly, my final suggestion for a sub-army. This one isn’t actually it’s own ‘you could run this as it’s own army and do reasonably well in low points games’, it’s mostly just a place to stick everything else Tau need. Give use more weird one off units that fill gaps. We don’t need a full sub-army for phychic, that’d be insane. But we do need some phychic phase rep. Give us like one model that’s a psychic jellyfish in a fish tank carried by a drone that gives you deny the witch and smite. It doesn’t need to be the best pycher in the game, in fact I don’t think it should be all that good. But just something to get around the fact that we have nothing phychic going on.

A jokero weapons smith that’s buffs shooting in an aura or attaches to a unit or something. Adds ap and damage, bypasses invulnerable, just like something to make one big gun crazy good

Sentient mycanoid blob that spawns an equivalent to tyranid bio-mine balloons so you can make objectives deadly to retake

Just more weird Tau auxiliaries

[b-movie-mondays]

B Movie Mondays

Llamageddon (NR, 2015) Amazon - Tubi Run Time: 1h 9m Watches: 6 IMDB Rating: 3.8/10 My Rating: 🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈 Word Count: 725

A cinematic masterpiece. Perhaps one of the only movies I’ll ever review to get all five sharks. Unironically one of my favorite films of all time. Comedic genius. 

What’s good about Llamageddon isn’t that it’s good; no, this movie is awful, but it has charm. It’s funny. It’s endearing. It ever gets old. There isn’t a boring scene in this godforsaken film. Llamageddon knows what it is. It’s a self-aware, on-purpose, B-movie-with-no-budget. That’s why I love it! The 6 watches is an estimate, because I’ve probably watched this movie countless times. Enough about my praises, let's get into the meat and potatoes of the 2015 Sci-Fi horror comedy “Llamageddon”.

Llamageddon follows the story of 20-something siblings Floyd and Mel, along with Mel’s friends, who she invited to their deceased grandparents’ home. How did their grandparents die you may ask yourself? A killer llama from outer space, of course! That’s right; the villain of this movie is a space-llama with laser eyes. 

The film starts with a lovely animated sequence of the killer llama planet, in which we see our Killer Llama (played by animal actor Louie the Llama) crash landing on planet Earth. Killer Llama, who I’ll be calling “KL” for short, wanders onto the property of MeeMaw and Pep Pep, our protagonists' grandparents. MeeMaw and Pep Pep assume the llama belongs to one of their neighbors…which turns out to be a grave mistake. MeeMaw and Pep Pep are brutally murdered. Shenanigans ensue.

Mel is a popular party girl and Floyd is a nerd. They really make sure you know this man is a loser in this film. It is referenced constantly. Floyd is cringe-fail. Floyd is a little meow meow. He is sopping wet and pathetic. I want to throw him around like a football. I want to put him in the washing machine and watch him spin. He’s like a milk-soaked Webkinz cat to me. 

Our two protagonists are joined by Mel’s friends, and all of them are incredible. The characters in this movie are just so strange and lovely. They’re flat yet 3-dimensional at the same time. My personal favorite is Dan, who changes his shirt 23 times throughout the whole movie. Let it be very clear that I don’t mean he changes his shirt on camera, but rather every time he’s on screen he’s wearing a new one. The first time it happens you think “Hey, look at this little inconsistency thing that happened” but  once you get up to about 5 you start anticipating and looking forward to it. 

Now the cast doesn’t particularly matter because save for Mel and Floyd, everyone dies. I like to try to make sure my reviews are at least somewhat spoiler free, so if you decide to watch it for yourself there’s at least some surprise, but this is just something that needs to be said. They all die. There are so many very, very absurd and over the top deaths that it’s laughable. Remember the game Dumb Ways To Die? It’s like that. Sometimes it's in a car explosion, sometimes it’s getting electrocuted in the jacuzzi, sometimes it’s getting shot after turning into a semi-sentient llama-man and laying tons of fuzzy alien llama eggs (yes, that really happens). You never know. KL spares no one. 

Llamageddon’s soundtrack is something worth mentioning as well. There is an original song created specifically for the movie played at the end of the film and it’s…kind of a bop? It goes kind of hard? I don’t want to sing too many praises to Llamageddon but this movie really does have it all. There’s no trope that goes untouched. It’s truly a masterpiece of cinema. 

Honestly writing this was a tad hard because there’s just so much that happens and so much to talk about. I don’t like posting super long reviews because I feel like no one reads them, but holy shit. I could write about this movie for hours and hours and hours. There’s just too much to touch on. I really can’t recommend you watch it enough. Get some friends to do it with though. I assure you this movie is a million times funnier if you’re subjecting someone to it. Have fun making your loved ones turn to you in confusion and concern and ask, “What the fuck are you making me watch?” 

[beanist]

angry rant about censorship below

i hate the fucking tiptoeing that adults have to do on the internet now. using "think of the children" to censor everything because that is what is fucking profitable now. and why is it profitable?? it certainly can't be fucking "market pressures" when adults want to spend SO much money on sex ALL the time! i'm a very young adult and even i fucking remember when dick and pussy was inserted into everything to make it more profitable. i remember it as a prepubescent child, and i much prefer that children have to shake their heads and be like Oh those Adults they are So Obsessed with their "Having Sex" and whatnot (and don't you fucking come at me with what about children who are abused? what about children who are traumatized? oh, do you think acting like sex is the most shameful fucking thing in the world helps with that abuse and trauma?) than fucking adults be struggling to get anything done. "bean is this about your silly dick cartoons that you hand out for free and don't affect your livelihood at all" yes it was certainly inspired by it but i'm not mad on my behalf. i'm mad at peoples lives who get upended due to this fucking shit.

locking humanity away behind capitalism, i fucking hate this shit.

and didn't we have heavily censored websites for children? webkinz? club penguin? the 8 year olds would much prefer to keep to themselves rather than have to humour gross weird adults who like "taxes" and "meal planning" and "intercourse" on "all ages" social media. i know because i fucking did! i knew webkinz and club penguin were censoring the shit out of my "bad words" but i didn't give a fuck because i got to talk to the sane people of the world, which at the time, was fellow 8 year olds! but i guess we cannot have nice things. i guess we can only have the logical endpoint of capitalism. i guess we can only have one internet, where everyone can be miserable.

and yeah, i guess if i personally want to get away from this stuff, i can get off the most mainstream of platforms and actually try snooping around the dark web or whatever. i don't want to have to do that. we are all tired adults with less and less time to look into these things. we are so tired.

[lpsotd]

so as a kid in the early 2000s I was pretty isolated. I went to a super small private school, only 2 other kids on my block besides my sister and I and they were both 5+ years older, stuff like that. I was in this organization about colonial US history and colonial US history is my sister's special interest so I never had to study for any US history class through college. my sister and I loved lps and we'd try to name them all. I don't remember most of them but I do remember naming a hamster we had "alexander hamilton" when I was like 5. needless to say, when hamilton came out I hated it for various reasons but internally I was also thinking "wait y'all didn't know about him when you were kids?"

anyways, thank you for your blog! I've retained my love of lps (in spite of the online game that was kinda like webkinz but wayyy cheaper that I didn't really like) through the years and I love when random good memories pop up!

alexander hamilton lps ... that is definitely something i thought i would never hear. you've reminded me of my days as a hamilton fan ... good lird. (that part of me no longer exists <3) i can totally imagine a. ham as a hamster tho (specifically a robo or a goldie) anyhoot. thank you for sharing !! :o) this was very fun to read hehe

[nedsseveredhead]

If you get this, answer with 3 random facts about yourself and send this to the last 7 people in your notifs! Let’s get to know each other better! (Anon or not, it doesn’t matter)

ASDFGHJ I FORGOT TO ANSWER THIS HI NATE I LOVE YOU now lets see i have got to be the most boring person alive

I have two identical scars next to eachother at my hairline because i swan dove into a bath tub as a toddler (there was a reason but i dont remember it) and bashed my head open on the faucet part. and it was winter and when we were walking outta the ER after the stitches I slipped on ice and bashed my head on someones car bumper and had to go back in for more stitches lol

In true nonbinary fashion, when I was still waffling over gender and identity stuff, I considered going by the name Sheep, then Shep, then axed that whole idea and went with Ned which people had already been calling me for years due to my user name. Speaking of, I legally have three names depending on what paperwork you look at. I snuck Elias into the first name section last minute when I was petitioning my name change so I officially have two first names, Edward Elias. Then when I converted to Judaism they had me pick a Hebrew name and after much discussion with the Rabbi we chose Yitzhak, so thats my official name on that paper work. I've also lowkey been playing with the name Francis recently. Neds never going away but I love names lmao

Okay originally 2 was two seperate answers but i ended up rambling about all the same stuff so heres one thats separate from name shit. When i was in likeeeee 5th/6th grade, and very much Lying About My Age on the internet (as you did back then), I got promoted to moderator of Webkinz Insider somehow. It was the most surreal experience of my life I had no idea what the fuck I was doing I'd just like. Write some articles. Edit a little maybe. And then the pressure got too much (and I was sorta growing out of webkinz a bit anyway) so i just logged off and never touched it again the end asdf (i actually looked it up to see if I could find any of my old work but it looks like the site shut down in 2021 and i cant be assed to check the wayback machine for my shitty writing asdfvg)

Okay thats it for Ned trivia love you <333

[webkinztournament]

Skell's Opinions - June 23 Polls

They're funny, I swear. Please remember that these are just virtual pets and stuffed animals. I will not rise from the depths of hell to strike you down for liking them (as metal as that would be).

Something about pets with spots just looks nasty. The signature German shorthaired pointer has a cute plush, but please, keep those in-game spots away from me. Also earth fawn looks like leafeon. Here's a cute image of the dog plush as compensation to whoever this take pisses off.

Reindeer calf's smile sees something in my soul that even I didn't know was there. Fear. It's some kind of fear. He looks cute in-game though, promise. I have to give it to purple goldfish, however, for having the cooler pet specific item (and being purple).

Honestly, poodle and mocha pup are equally as good. Defaulting to poodle for simply being more OG.

Wow I hate the cute octopus, but I hate the pioneer pony's patterning more. From afar, it looks like its flesh is falling off the bone. Put it out of its misery.

I can't stop thinking about how the kiger mustang looks like Chris Mclean's ponysona. HELP.

Lollipop snail looks like something out of Turbo (derogatory).

Akita puppy comes with a cherry blossom hot tub??? Yeah no springy kangaroo is dust.

We did it. We found the worst Webkinz. It's texting puppy.

Literally what is on top of groovy gorilla's head, it looks like a sea anemone gone parasitic.

Ya'll. Ya'll. The Rottweiler has a pool table with a chain on it. And his food is served in a studded bracelet. The Webkinz I never knew I needed.

Hoppy floppy bunny wins by virtue of not being celestial unicorn.

Signature horse is VERY cute, but I had to side with Rockerz cat for being horrendous in the most endearing scene-kid-wannabe way.

Weimaraner is the obvious choice when up against a print catastrophe. What is wrong with you all for voting musical Dalmatian? There's worse prints, but I stand firmly on my ground.

I dislike the tinker pets, but I hate the goblins.

Brilliant penguin has a way cooler pet specific item than 2023 French bulldog.

Ok, tanuki versus axolotl is a wild matchup. These two are tanks that could easily destroy many other foes, and yet they wound up together. Pity. I sided with tanuki for weeb points.

I'll admit, I voted for glamorous gorilla ironically.

*Sigh*, do I have to pick the cat? Well, black panther cub was up against ballet pup, so I guess I do.

Kiwi parrot is a very cute concept, but I'm handing it to the sea otter for also being cute, and, more importantly, having a plush.

Chonk boi expectation versus adult human man reality:

White swan. Based.

Cocoa dinosaur is a lesson in how to do Valentine's day without inadvertently telling me you only learned 2 colors in preschool (pink and red).

Angora bunny has a cute plush, but they really dropped the ball with the wing-like ears. Buttons bear is stinkin' cute, however, and comes with a little sewing machine. Bless.

Basset hound. It has everything. Being a classic pet, having a cute plush, and, most importantly, being able to wear more than just shirts, hats, and glasses. Sorry not sorry, blue bay dolphin.

Signature cheetah is so yellow, it looks like cheese. I like cheese.

The boxer is inoffensive, but sheep is baby.