#do you really think a cool trend is worth risking the jobs of many and the future of art?

[merrilymp3]

i hate people's acceptance of AI when it's "cool" and "convenient." stop giving it materials to weaponize in the future, i don't care what it's for. AI could take away future and current jobs for so many people, and you are helping it.

[amphtaminedreams]

A/W 2020 Fashion Month: Before Vogue Went Blank

Hi to anyone reading,

I’m sorry this post is so late! I really have no excuse apart from all my mental energy being taken up by shooting and editing my Euphoria lookbook up until now and me being too much of a lazy, nap-loving twat to face the mammoth task of a fashion month review; honestly, by the time it’s done, it’s like a dissertation-level amount of characters, so let’s say the final push to get this out is in sympathy with all my 3rd year friends I started uni with finishing their ACTUAL dissertations.

Things have got scary since I originally started saving the photos for this post, and the world has been turned upside down. In response to the COVID-19 pandemic, the likes of which have not been seen since the Spanish Flu, Italian Vogue’s April cover was blank. As I’m writing this, 26,000+ people have died of coronavirus in Italy, the worst affected country behind the U.S in terms of sheer numbers ( though quick update: as I post this, I’m pretty sure our incompetent prick of a PM has made sure we’re up there too). Proportionally, the actual death rate is even higher, along with a handful of other European countries. There have been some complaints made about the cover and it’s supposed “lack of imagination”; all I know is that in a country whose death toll accounts for 10% of worldwide coronavirus deaths, something of a visual silence feels appropriate. 

That being said, for me, writing is one of the only things giving me a sense of purpose right now. Yeah, surprise surprise, working in a grocery store isn’t all that fulfilling. Who would’ve thought it? So what better time to reflect on a time when all the rich people of the world were going about their lives as usual and sitting front row at fashion week rather than crying on Instagram live to their millions of followers about how trapped they feel in their 10 bedroom mansions.

I’ve got to say, this year’s A/W offerings were a lot better than I expected, mostly due to the fact that I’m not generally a big fan of winter fashion; it’s hard to be disappointed given my preconceptions! There’s only so many knits and coats and jeans you can see before it begins to get a bit tiring, and I expected that to be reflected in the presentations. Fortunately, even the brands which are known for their bohemian, Coachella-esque collections generally managed to translate that into something recognisable and consistent on the runway whilst actually being weather appropriate. Of course, there were a few disappointments-I’m sure if I say one of them begins with D, you can guess which brand I’m talking about-but that was more than made up for by the standouts. Gucci in particular was my 2013 Tumblr wet dream and the Moschino show was what I can only describe as a live continuation of Sofia Coppola’s Marie Antoinette, though I’ll stop with my praise there and wait til I get to actually reviewing before I go overboard with kissing Alessandro Michele’s ass. And on that note, in chronological order, I’ll get one with the reviews! First up, Acne:

Continuing on a winning streak when it comes to catering to my personal preferences (if someone tries to tell me designers don’t care about my personal preferences I’m going to whack out that “just found out the world doesn’t revolve around me, shocked and upset” Marina Diamandis tweet), Acne once again channels futuristic hippy commune living in a dystopian wasteland. I know, those are very specific personal preferences

I love the shredded hems and the burnt velvet, the rawness of it all, and the baroque/your-nan’s-wallpaper patterns are actually a surprisingly nice touch. I imagine if Giselle from Enchanted had to make her dresses out of a thrifty goth’s curtains rather than an upper-middle-class New Yorker’s, they’d look something like this collection. You’ve even got the odd bit of classic fresh Scandi tailoring in there with the oversized coats and blazers which holds it back from being a bit TOO flea market. Plus, the renaissance painting detailing on the black leather-look coat is a stunning detail as well; I’m so glad it seems this trend is here to stay, why wouldn’t I want random nude bodies all over my clothes? 

As for the styling, I can’t get enough of the tousled hair. As an eternally tired person who can't be arsed to pick up a brush most of the time, I feel represented. Along with the outfits, it says “I’m an art student/transient painter in the 70s living in a city loft who smokes a lot of weed and does acid on the regular” and that is a life worth manifesting.

Alberta Ferretti was dreamy, and a perfect example of how to translate the bohemian aesthetic of their S/S show to A/W. Somehow despite the furs, ruffles (pussy-bows under tailored jackets and knits/generally heavier pieces always looks really chic imo), tulle, metallic tapestry style prints and chunky jewellery, it all still looks very effortless, like a natural continuation of what we saw last summer; the typically masculine structure of the oversized suits with the ornate patterns and the accessories lends to the careful navigation along the line where maximalism and minimalism meet, the looks as practical as they are decorative. Picture it: you work some high-flying, powerful job in the city, commute on a motor cycle and roll up in one of these suit sets. This collection is for the edgy businesswoman who is completely comfortable telling all the twattish males she works with where to stick it and I want to be her. 

The evening gowns are, of course, stunning too. In this analogy where I am a powerful businesswoman and not a pushover who works at a grocery store right now and only beefs with rude customers, I would be wearing one of them to the boujie work Christmas party. The ruffled dresses remind me of something Valentino would put out with the colour palette and the ruffles, and whilst we’re on the topic of colour palettes, this one is beautiful. The lilac and hot pink is SO right.

Though predictable, Alessandra Rich is just as much of a treat as usual, the first brand you’d go to if you were styling a throwback it-girl, Chanel Oberlin in Scream Queens if it took place 30 years earlier. Reminiscent of an amalgamation of vintage Chanel and Versace, there are so many cute details I love here, from the white tights with the black heels and the double breasted blazers to the gold chainlink belts and the pearls. The tartan suits with the shoulder padding are very Heathers, the prints the best of your mum’s 80s wardrobe, and nobody else out there is doing bows as well as this; these are the outfits that prissy bitch wears in the cartoons of my childhood that turn out to actually be quite good fashion inspo 15 years later, Trixie Tang from Fairly Odd Parents I’m looking at you. 

This girl was the blueprint. 

I think someone like Lilly Collins or Daphne Groeneveld would be an ideal fit for any of these looks, or Lana Del Rey if she wanted to stop serving us middle-aged suburban soccer mom and took us back to those H&M ad campaign days. Lana stans please don’t come for me for saying that, I am one of you; I say this because I love her. It’s all altruistic. 

Whilst I admittedly didn’t love it as much as last summer’s, I really enjoyed the Alexander McQueen collection too, plus I had a better idea of what to expect this time round; no, we’re not gonna get a repeat of the Plato’s Atlantis show but we do always get some beautiful pieces. Again, like with Alberta Ferretti, this seems like a natural continuation of what we saw in the summer, just with adjustments made for the colder, darker, and altogether moodier months. A/W being the gothier older sister of S/S, it seems right that a lot of the looks turn their back on the ethereal, almost fairy-like feel of what we saw before and embrace the vampier side, reds and blacks (the ultimate Bratz Rock Angels colour combination), plenty of dramatic structures and formidable suit sets. It’s punk but it’s classy, and even with the lighter pieces, we’ve got the grunge inspired harnesses on top to contrast with the elegance and effectively, toughen the whole look up, something Gucci does well too. 

The patterned suits with the clunky boots in particular are very cool and I need a gun metal grey heart detailing harness, but undoubtedly the MOMENT of this collection is Adut Akech in what appears to be a silver chainmail dress. She looks like an Amazonian goddess, and whilst I could never dream of pulling something like that off myself, I could happily admire her in it for hours.

There wasn’t much to get excited about at Altuzarra. The collection was very elegant for sure and the feathered belts are cute but it was all quite pedestrian and nothing new-the only detail I really like is the cut out on the second dress from the left, 3rd row down.

As for Anna Sui:

I’m not altogether sure why I wanted to review it. A lot of the outfits as a whole are a bit messy, and not in that avant-garde, expensive-looking Margiela kind of way, just in a “how many fabrics can we possibly get on this model” kind of way. Plus, the styling seems weirdly outdated-a lot of the jewellery looks like the kind of thing you’d see if you searched “gothic choker” on Ebay and ordered the results from low to high, and the makeup and hair in particular is very 2012 Tumblr fashion blogger. Backcombed hair and red lipstick? We’ve got a Zoella thumbnail on our hands.

When the collection did go down the bohemian route though (and when that route wasn’t a failed attempt at what Etro does a lot better), there were a few nice pieces and prints. I mean you really can’t go wrong with a teal fur trimmed coat.

Ashish, on the other hand, took their aesthetic from a similar era and did it a lot more creatively and kookily; this collection looks a lot more deserving of being on a runway. The prints are so loud and costume-y that at times the garments risk looking like something you’d wear at a decades themed dress up party, but they’re saved by understated and much more commercial silhouettes, plus some gorgeous hair and make up. On the whole, very groovy, unintentional disco queen, despite the few risks that didn’t quite pay off.

Next is a brand I always look forward to. In the words of Myrtle Snow:

BALENCIAGA!

Seriously though, if any brand knows how to blend costume and high fashion, it’s them. They take over-the-top, almost absurd silhouettes and turn them into theatre. This year we’re taking it in the direction of Phantom of the Opera, I guess? Dracula? The Woman in Black? An off-broadway production of Harry Potter where Snape is the protagonist? Whatever the direction of the collection is, I live for the dramatics of it all. Demna Gvasalia got these models walkin’ down the runway like they’re members of the Volutri, which is a reference you should all understand given the renaissance Twilight is having online atm.

Straight off the bat, I adore the staging, and all the models are exquisite-the theme of the show was climate change, and I always love when there’s a story behind the presentation of the clothes. I can’t imagine how amazing this must have been to witness in person, though I’m guessing equal parts mystical and intimidating. There are so many things I love here: billowing coats, cinched in waists, the pattens that are sprinkled sparingly in amongst the black, and the bloody shoulder pads that almost run PARALLEL to the model’s necks. This is really a collection that Myrtle Snow would be proud of and brb whilst I get rid of my padlock necklaces in favour of putting whatever meagre amount I can get for them on Depop towards a Balenciaga padlock belt (as if, lol, I don’t even think selling my soul would cover it).

And then there’s Balmain, which isn’t always the fashion critic’s favourite, but which I do tend to like. 

I mean there are some really good takeaways here-though the 80s inspired suit, as wearable as they are, can get a little repetitive, they are staples which here seem to pave the way for Olivier Rousteing to try something new for the brand. The moulded breast plates (reminiscent of the Tom Ford one Zendaya wore though I’m not sure which came first!), for example, along with the Matador-style capes and the flowing silk dresses are the most glamorous incarnation of Lara Croft one can possibly imagine, probably just as equally suited for a Roman goddess as they are for an Assassins Creed style action heroine. And yes, I am aware of the fact that Tomb Raider and Assassins Creed are two separate games, okay!  I just don’t know enough about the visuals of either to firmly plant this collection in the camp of either one, so I’m going down the crossover route with it!

Not to say there weren’t any bad choices-I omitted a good portion of the looks that were shown; there were definitely pieces that I found to be a little tacky, particularly a recurring chain print which has got to be one of my least favourite patterns out there. Overall, though, it’s gonna be the richly coloured art-deco prints, the wet-look boots and the gem-encrusted scorpion brooch which stick with me, so I’ll let it slide. 

Bottega Veneta was very meh; even of the looks I picked out, there are a lot I’m now looking back at and wishing I hadn’t included. Some of the men’s pieces are nice, sure, and I feel like one of those vaguely sick, victorian ghost looking male celebrities everyone obsesses over (Timothée Chalamet and Dane DeHaan I’m looking at you) would make those suits on the second row look fine af, but it’s mostly the womenswear that I’m here for and on this occasion it wasn’t great. A couple of the coats are nice and that’s about it. Like I really had to act as if the tassels weren’t there on a lot of the clothes and go from there because I really don’t like them in this context and if I was to veto looks purely on one of the garments having tassels, there’d be nothing to show or reference when giving my opinion on the show. They were EVERYWHERE. In a summer collection, done right, they can be a nice detail but here they just feel unnecessary and if I’m being honest, are quite ugly. 

Thank god for Brock taking the sour Bottega Veneta tassel taste out of my mouth. Never a let down. Literally, everything they put out sends me into a daze of imagining I’m in some romantic drama wearing one of the pieces, in a man’s idea of “no makeup”, running round in a field looking forlorn and windswept because my ghostly lover has-

Okay, you get the picture. I’ve never read Wuthering Heights, but it goes something like that, right? If not, lets just say envisioning myself in any of these catapults me straight into some period drama where I’m born into wealth and sit by my mansion window looking sad all the time and writing poetry and lusting over some stuffy upper-class man I can’t have and who is probably played by Colin Firth because I’m pretty sure that’s what happens in most of them (about to enrage my future English lit undergraduate sister with that line).

Nobody does modest, muted sexy to such a masterful degree. I mean, when Maison Marigela did face veils I was just mildly afraid, but here they’re subtle enough that they’re quite beautiful and almost other-worldly, acting as some kind of boundary between this world and the past that Brock aims to recapture through its designs-the red lip popping out from underneath is a perfect touch too. I don’t like it AS much as the summer collection but I would say that’s solely on the basis of the more autumn/winter appropriate colour scheme and the heavier fits, which is just a personal preference. I mean, I’m usually not a fan of empire waistlines at all and Brock even manages to make that work.

Burberry this season was a real mixed bag, mostly due to the styling. There are some really gorgeous, London back alley vintage shop looking pieces, especially the 70s style coats, reminiscent of outerwear a slimy record exec would've worn back in the day repurposed by someone like Alexa Chung or Zoe Kravitz or whichever effortlessly cool woman it is we all want to be-also the private boy’s school rugby gear looking shit is classic Burberry and I’m a fan of that, even though it’s not the most inventive or exciting. I just don’t get why there had to be SO much ill-fitting plaid over ill-fitting plaid. Again, like with Bottega Veneta, I thought the menswear was a lot stronger; whilst I wasn’t really wowed by anything, it seemed a lot less forced, whereas a few of the womenswear looks gave me the vibe of a design team desperately grasping onto some ill-conceived ideas of street style and relevancy. 

The design team at Carolina Herrera for example, know their niche. They never try to be something they’re not, always sublimely preppy and pretty and predictable-when it comes to target market, the bag is reliably secured. Laid- back princess dresses never get old for those constantly “summering” in one expensive coastal town or another, for the rich American moms attending charity galas and the Spencer Hastings and Blair Waldorfs of the world; women with glossy hair and fresh faces who act as if they woke up looking like that polished but are actually anal as hell and take 2 hours to get ready and would NEVER, I repeat NEVER, shit in a public toilet. 

Yes, I managed to worm toilet habits into a review of a Carolina Herrera collection. I’m sorry. Enough with the pearl clutching. 

Next is Celine:

I mean, when there are THIS many looks, it’s hard not to find something you like, and though VERY predictable and verging on lazy when you’re putting out the same shit every collection, Celine’s aesthetic is so similar to my own ideal style, it’s hard to be mad at it. That being said, a lot of the pieces, as per usual, came across as cheap YSL knock offs; the overall outfits are cute, but the more you look at the details-it particularly pained me to include a metal bow belt and an ill-fitting velvet skater skirt but I liked the rest of the outfits-the worse it gets. Please, PLEASE someone drive it home to Hedi Slimane, I’m begging you: QUALITY NOT QUANTITY. I get what he’s going for, 70s hipster Jane Birkin is a vision I can very much get behind, but not when it seems to be so rushed.

With the men’s looks, you can get away with it a lot more; when so much of menswear is so plain and unchanging, the slightest hint of Mick Jagger is enough to make a outfit edgy. But even then, I still feel like we’re seeing a load of variations of the same outfit. There are always some pieces that catch my eye, this time round the capes and the velvet blazers, and I would wear most of these things, sure, however I don’t think the combinations SHOULD necessarily look like something I’d personally put together; a runway collection is supposed to be aspirational and cutting edge, not pedestrian (entirely intentional self-drag, lol). Also, side note, the lack of diversity really bothered me. 111 looks and not one of these models has a body type that is naturally achievable for most people. It’s 2020 for fuck’s sake. I’m tired.

SO, let’s liven things up a bit with the Central Saint Martins collection, a breath of fresh air in terms of diversity (though a few more plus-size models would be nice):

As a former University of London student, I hate to heap praise upon them. If you’ve studied in London as well, you’ll know CSM students are ANNOYING. I mean, I’m sure they’re lovely as individuals but you can’t fully understand the meaning of the word pretentious until you’ve seen a group of them at a Uniqlo Tate Late. That being said, they are very good at what they do and I’m so glad that Vogue Runway includes them; this is what Off-White thinks it is, and really it makes sense that a bunch of current fashion students are able to come together to present one of the most experimental and forward-thinking shows of this season. 

And let’s talk about the RANGE. From catsuits worthy of comic book heroes to  dresses Twiggy would’ve worn in a 1960s editorial, every subgenre of fashion has been fully delved into here. Whilst we’ve got the adrogyny of the suits and suspenders combo and kitschy gender-bending co-ords David Bowie would be proud of, at the other end of the scale we’ve also got models walking down the runway dressed like wood nymphs or some other kind of siren-like creatures. There’s looks that wouldn’t be out of place in a Gucci or Come Des Garcons collection but at that same time would be equally at home in a Berlin techno club. 

Honestly, credit where credit’s due-it was a really interesting show and I wouldn’t expect anything less.

Chanel was quite literally the polar opposite of the CSM show. 

Very blah. 

It’s crazy because before you properly get INTO fashion, Chanel is like the epitome of style. And then you do, and you see the runway shows get lazier and lazier (with some exceptions) every year, and you realise that same prestige that had you aware of Chanel at the age of 7 or 8 is literally all that’s keeping the brand going at this point. I’m not saying the collection is flat out ugly, a lot of it’s cute, but you’re CHANEL for fuck’s sake. Yeah, I like the crucifixes but SCALLOPED HEMS!? No. I do NOT recall travelling back in time to witness Primark’s Spring 2013 collection on the runway and I am NOT having it.

It’s not at all surprising that a lot of the time newer brands Charlotte Knowles (above) tend to be more interesting than those more established-and yes that was a Chanel indirect if the transition wasn’t obvious.

With no room to rest on laurels or reputation, everything has to be bolder and smarter and more distinctive and most importantly, has to appeal to its target market with the fervour of an L.A sign spinner. I only found out about Charlotte Knowles because of a Vogue article citing her as Bella Hadid’s new favourite brand to wear, and once I saw the collection, it was clear why; daringly modern, slick, and edgy is both her street style (say what you want about her as a model but her outfit game is unbeaten) and Knowles’ USP to a T. If Dion Lee, Off-White, GCDS and Acne had an orgy, this would be the result, and that is a GOOD compliment.

Next, Chloe:

Not a huge amount to say, to be honest. Low-key, wearable, and cute. Like Emma Roberts’ Nancy Drew if she did an autumn exchange program at the Sorbonne and studied art history, libraries and coffee shops on the weekdays and galleries and protests at the weekend. On reflection, that definitely makes this collection sound more exciting than it is but there are some effortlessly beautiful pieces here. The 4th row in particular is full of stand outs-the vest with the watercolour faces on with the shirt underneath is perfection, and the burgundy suit with the saffron ruffled collar peeking out from underneath is adorable and not at all reminiscent of the Ronald McDonald inspired nightmare that any combination of red and yellow tones should theoretically be.

As for Christian Siriano, I see why people hate it, I really do. I understand that it seems kinda unfair to have it show the same week as Brock and Rodarte and Oscar de La Renta. We’re talking 2 very different kinds of quality here. BUT, at pure face value, his clothes are FUN, plus Coco Rocha will always have a special place in my heart as someone who lived on The Face and America’s Next Top Model and every show that could possibly give me an unhealthy body image ever.

Like are you telling me you wouldn’t wear these dresses to a party!? Live a little. They just need tailoring...which ideally would be done BEFORE the model’s walking down the runway in it but...you know...can’t have it all.

Christopher Kane is a show I always look forward to.

I would say his designs are the only thing that make geometry look fun but I’m going to expose myself and admit that would be a lie because I actually found geometry really fun. Trigonometry was my shit, lol.

He is a designer who perfectly demonstrates that juggling interseasonal consistency and taking risks can be done. There’s always something DIFFERENT about his collections, fresh and subtly experimental. There are occasionally a few misses, sure, but I’d rather that than for a brand to keep playing safe, plus he never goes too far in the opposite direction either; no going weird for the sake of weird. I don’t like it AS much as the summer collection but it’s mostly because of the more muted, autumn/winter appropriate colour palette.

Comme Des Garçons? Too weird?

Never.

Honestly when it comes to a CDG collection, I have to really shift my perspective to appreciate it. I’m not looking at fashion presentation, I’m looking at a moving piece of experimental art. I know, it’s a stretch. But you know you’ll never be bored by one of their shows. Not gonna lie, this specific collection crossed the line into plain ugly a couple of times for me. We had padding so extravagant it looked like several models were walking round with Ikea pillows stuck to their chest and headdresses reminiscent of the kids’ game Headbandz. In amongst that though, we did get some gorgeous veils like the ones seen above and the shoes and socks combo is actually quite wearable.

I’d say Dilara Findikoglu is the cut-off point after which things get a little too avant-garde for my personal taste, and it hovers over that cut-off point flawlessly; despite the other-worldly elements of her collections, they remain somewhat grounded by nods towards conventional fashion that allow the beauty, be it inner or outer, of the wearer to shine through. Comme Des Garcons garments undeniably have character but they tend to swallow up any trace of the individual underneath, whereas the character of Dilara Findikoglu garments seamlessly merges with the wearer and in turn elevates both to something transcendent and ethereal. If the Pussycat Dolls got transported into a rugged, post-apocalyptic future, they’d scrape together these outfits to perform in, I know it; the energy of the collection, with the body jewellery and the frayed cut outs and the chalk white faces, is very warrior princess, just as raw and intimidating as it is hot as fuck, and I want that energy in my life. Along with a Dilara belt, of course. I would wear her name like a badge of honour anytime she wants. Dilara, pls pls let me be part of your tribe. PLEASE.

Anyway, this is where I thought I’d cut things off, so as to end on a positive note. You know what that means: Dior is coming up. I feel bad knowing my first post was defending Maria Grazia and yet here I am now, looking at the bar down on the floor, but I mean, you never know; maybe girl is doing this on purpose and one day she’s gonna come out with a Gucci level quality show like a phoenix from the ashes.

If you got this far, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING even if you’re just here for the pics. Part 2 will be covering some of my most anticipated shows from Elie Saab, Fendi and Etro to Gucci and Moschino, Miu Miu and Marc Jacobs, and everything in between. Yes, the shitty ones too.

I’m plowing through all the material as quick as I can so I hope to get the next post up really soon, and yes-you can count on the overwhelming sense of needing to be productive pushing me into fulfilling that statement. 

Thanks again and I hope you’re well!

Lauren x

[inventors-fair]

Rock and Roil Commentary

What a wild one! Everyone did a great job this week, I saw a lot of really creative cards, and I was happy that we same a very nice mix of lands and non-lands. I noticed a common trend in a lot of them. I wish in my article I had talked about the idea of giving the player the choice. We had a lot of entries that either forced the lands to become creatures, or turned them in to creatures permanently. I don’t know if people realized how dangerous that is, making players put their lands at risk of getting hit by removal or sweepers with very little way to protect them. I don’t think every card should have avoided it, I just worry that some people didn’t realise it was as much of a downside it is. Also, nobody wanted to make a lategame beater like most of the landfolk are, everyone wanted to make giant busted gods.

Anyway, here’s the commentary for everybody! It’s in alphabetical order based on your tumblr name.

@dabudder - Oran-Rief Awakening

I see you took this contest to its logical conclusion. What if they were all creatures? First things first, I like the first trigger. I like how it’s optional, I like how it trigger at combat, I like how it untaps the land as some sort of weird ramp, I wish it granted haste. I like how it can either be a sort of slow finisher in green ramp decks or a way to turn your ramp spells into blockers as you wait for your big stuff to come out. Pretty good. The win the game trigger, however, I do not like. A five mana enchantment that wins the game with nothing but a Zuran Orb is too strong in my book. It’s also not hard to ramp this out with creatures by turn 3, giving you only 3 lands you need to animate. I really wish this were more like a planeswalker ultimate, where it only MOSTLY wins you the game. Preferably something that scales with land creatures, such as “put X +1/+1 counters on each land creature you control.” Your heart’s in the right place, I just wish you would have made the payoff a little more interesting.

@deafeningsandwichpeach - Ranged Wildlands // Borlox

There is a LOT of text on this card. Enters tapped unless you control an animal, sure, though might be a little strong considering it’s already fine as a tapped triland. The Slate of Ancestry ability is REALLY strong on a land, considering it still seems some minor play when it cost 4 mana to play. And the Borlox, which admittedly does cost a lot to flip, is also really really powerful. I think you could remove half the abilities form both sides of this card and it would still see tons play. On non-power level concerns, I think the card may be trying to pull in too many directions. Try focusing it into doing just one thing well instead of a lot of things all at once.

@emmypupcake - Flooding Mire // Deepmire Serpent

One of the few untapped lands, but the fact that it can only flip on endstep is a really cool way to sidestep the haste issue. I also really like that mana fixing downside because it is a pretty major downside, especially in decks that are playing enough basics to flip it. But boy, that downside is really made up for on such a strong card. In a controlling shell, that guy can really do a lot of damage (figuratively). It might be decent in aggressive becks as well, but the unreliant nature of the mana and the creature might be more trouble than an agro deck wants. Which brings me to my biggest issue with this card, and it’s a big one: the flip isn’t optional. This means that a control deck might be forced to keep lands in hand to not flip it (either this land or basics), or play the land just to lose another. I know it can be played around with appropriate sequencing and deck building, but it just seems like an unnecessary problem. If you just put “may” on this card, it becomes a lot cleaner of an execution.

@fractured-infinity - Presence of Solara

I was expecting a lot more auras, but I’m happy with this one. So, at three mana this plays like a slightly worse Dungrove Elder, trading off hexproof for trample and some commander stuff, but I don’t think the trade-off is quite worth it. I really like the presence mechanic, and I like how you incorporated commander damage into it, though I’d be worried about Presence on an equipment. But as for the card itself, it seems fine, I could see a lot of decks using it, but it’s not really pushing any design space, and I don’t understand why it needs to be an aura as opposed to just a creature with the P/T ability. I know there’s stuff that can be done with that, like arbor elf to give it vigilance or animating a Nykthos so you can untap it with creature untap abilities, but those combos seem pretty minor as opposed to the headache of rules or losing a land every time someone kills your commander.

@dimestoretajic - Sower of Vengeance

Wow, that’s a card. This is a fun card to read as it just gets nuts the further you go. It’s in the right colors, the set symbol is good, the abilities all interact in cool ways, the theme is fun. I checked, though, and multi-blocking doesn’t grant more than one counter, so that’s awkward. I like the idea of storing up damage until it dies and you get a massive army of huge creatures, but I think there could have been a neater way to do it. As is, some lands will have different counters than others, and some won’t be able to attack but others might. I also wish it only lasted for a turn, instead of lasting forever. It’s bound to either win you the game or lose you it very quickly. All that said, as messy as a card it is to play, I can’t ignore the fact that there’s a lot of really cool ideas going on here, and out of all of the hard to gauge cards submitted, this was the one I most hope is playable.

@gofytomcat1 - Monument to the Ancient Way

Always nice to see jeskai representation. I like the strict upgrade to mystic monastery, a card that was just barely under playable in standard, but sees a lot of play in casual formats. I like the cost on the activation: a 3/2 flyer for 4 is good, but the three color restriction reins it in a bit. I like prowess here for the jeskai throwback but I think it plays a little bit against the card. The fact that you could activate the ability twice means you could get two instances of prowess, which will both trigger independently, and if you somehow activate a second time after casting spells, you will have to remember that some spells have been doubled up and some haven’t. Also, you’re usually going to be activating this late game when you’re out of cards in hand and have nothing better to do with your mana, so prowess won’t come up often, which I guess is good considering what I just mentioned. Anyway, good card! Prowess is a little awkward on it, but I like what it does in the colors it’s in.

@gollumni - Krug, Utmungr Worshipper

So it ramps when attacking, and has menace? Seems solid. I like how it’s not ramp unless your opponent’s board is clear enough, but maybe that’s fine because you can always choose to not do it. I’d almost suggest to give the land menace instead of trample to link it closer with Krug, but it’s fine as is. Very solid card, not much to say.

@i-am-the-one-who-wololoes - Dormant Earth

Lots going on here, but I think I like it for the most part. I like the bounce effect, it’s something you don’t see a ton but works really well in land-centric decks. It also helps balance the manaless activation cost. I like the simple ETB tapped effect to deal with haste problems and the colors are good. As for the main event, the landfall ability, I’m a little torn. I like using landfall as an animation tool, since if you’re topdecking lands, chances are you’re fine throwing one into combat. I really wish it didn’t trigger itself, but I know landfall has to trigger on all lands, so your hands were kind of tied there. Similarly, I wish it was optional, since getting your land hit by a bolt when it entered tapped anyway and wasn’t going to attack just feels bad. I think this card was just a scant few steps from being at the top.

@illharg-the-rave-boar - Tomb of the Buried Ancients

This card scares me. Any land that can tap for multiple mana is terrifying, and giving it to dredge is a whole other thing. The downside is paying life, which as we all know, is why no one play ancient tomb (hey wait a minute). But I said I’d be judging cards in a standard-level environment, and it’s much tougher to self-mill in standard, but a couple looting effects and you have an extra mana or two scarily easily. As for the animating ability, it seems by far to be in the background. Not being usable until you’re got 10 or 11 mana means it’s not going to see use except in some very long games (which if you’re acelerating with this, probably won’t happen). It’s also odd that the untap ability wants deserts in your graveyard but the animating turns them indestructible. I really wish that last ability weren’t on there, because otherwise I think this would be a great card, but with it there I just think it will break... everything.

@industrialsalad - Genju of the Future

Callbacks on callbacks on callbacks. I like the use of frame, considering it’s using a future sight mechanic (and has future in the name). I like the card! Paying two to make a land into a 2/2 is pretty good, especially at uncommon, and making it repeatable is nice. It’s a good way to deal with flood but has use in the early game if need be. I don’t understand the need for the unattach clause, other than to prevent animating multiple lands in a turn, but that doesn’t seem like THAT bad of an idea. Upping the fortify cost could have covered that, which I probably would have suggested anyway. I just worry that playing it, fortifying for free without intent to use it for a few turns, then getting hit with a naturalize that also takes out your land is rough. I know it’s flavorful, but it makes for some disheartening gameplay. I think this is a really cool idea and a lot of it is done really well and cleverly, but it just needed a little more time in the oven.

@kavinka - Face Island

I liked this card when I first read it, but the more I thought about it the less I liked it. At first I liked how it has a straightforward enters-tapped taps for blue base, and I like how the ability is really pricey, meaning it’s meant only for late-game decks (which is what blue usually wants). But there are a bunch of minor things that bug me. First, the last ability is worded such that it isn’t obvious if it needs to be a creature or not for it to “die.” If not, this is very strong with cards that let you sacrifice lands, but I don’t think that’s the intent. I like how it gives you a consolation prize if your opponent kills your expensive creature, but the prize is 2 more lands when you already had at least 11. And lastly, the fact that the giant has reach, while I’m sure it’s just for flavor, makes me think you’re going to block with it somehow, which seems... unlikely. So, as whole it’s very good, but starts to break apart after some thought.

mardu-lesbian - Barricade Inciter

In soviet gruul, gate crashes YOU. Old memes aside, a neat card. I like gate synergies, I like the menace. I don’t quite understand the 2brid mana, it seems kind of unnecessary, since at rare this is mostly going to be constructed, and you should be able to make triple green pretty easy by turn four in ravnica blocks. I also don’t quite get the untap. Usually animation spells that untap are nissa abilities that use them to generate mana. If it’s just there so you can target a gate that you already used to pay for the ability, I think that it’s okay to ask them to pay attnetion to what they’re tapping. As for the ability itself, I like it, but I really wish that fight were optional, especially with a three toughness creature. I know you could always just target a basic, but the fact that it could actually be a downside on a bad draw is a little awkward. I don’t know how I feel about it also being gate hate (since you can target opponent’s gates), but I don’t think it’ll come up except in super awkward mirror matches. There’s a lot of things I like on this card, but I wish it had just a few less quirky interactions.

@monoblue82 - Mountain Memorialist

Mount Rushmore maker? Cool concept. I get why you made it red: red gets land animating, red is the color of artists, and its got mountain in the name! But this is definitely a black card. Even though it’s happening to a land, this is a reanimation spell. It is taking a creature card in a graveyard and making it be in play. If it were black, I’d say the card was fine. It seems weird that the card would still be a land, but all of the land abilities would be overwritten. I think. I don’t know if keeping it as a land lets it keep its land subtypes. I think the ability might be a little overcosted, based on Obsessive Stitcher, but I’m not sure. This is a tough card to evaluate, but my main concern is just that it isn’t red.

@nine-effing-hells Hojamu, Quiescent Caldera // Rohojam, Raging Heart of the Land

The volcano requires a sacrifice. Nice. So, sacrifice a creature, get an 8/8 first strike trample? And your opponent can only stop it by sacrificing creatures? And if they don’t have any, they’re screwed? I think this might be a bit too good compared to effects like jinxed idol that also bounce back and forth by saccing creatures, but kill much slower than this. It also seems weird that this god isn’t indestructible, considering the amount of effort it takes to bring him out. I really like the story it’s telling, but I think it would have played better on an enchantment.

@reaperfromtheabyss - Sacellum of the Sun

I like what this card is trying to do. I like the very slight but not insignificant downside. I like how the color ability requires a permanent in play, and the animate ability also requires permanents in play. I also like that this is in white. I’m sure it’s meant to be a cycle, but white specifically has access to a lot of high-devotion permanents that are relatively hard to remove. I really like how this card helps enchantment (especially prison) decks close out the game, even getting through Enduring Ideal. There is a little bit of issue when it comes to summoning sickness, since you don’t want to give it haste as it’s sort of a white card, but if you have two in play, it’s very easy to misclick if you’re playing on a digital client. I’m also concerned on the blowout potential of removal in response to the activation, which isn’t fun, but I think if you’re at the point where you’re turning a land into a creature with only one card giving devotion, you know what you’re risking. so yes, a very well made card with a couple of random minor nitpicks.

@shakeszx - Standing Battlements

More fortify! Cool! I like the replacement effect, I think it is phrased correctly. It’s actually kind of cool how, even though damage doesn’t get removed, it’s no longer a creature, so if it dies in combat you’ll end up with a land with damage marked on it (just don’t attach another standing battlements to it). I also like how the replacement effect interacts with it being a fortification. If it was an aura, it would just have totem armor, but you instead give the player the opportunity to just lose out on a land if they would rather have the battlements out. I’m not sure on the cost of this fortification, since you’ve basically got a blackblade reforge that can attach to lands, but also costs colored mana, but also protects the user. If I were playing it safe I’d tack another mana onto the casting cost, but I kinda just like playing it safe. I also don’t know what deck outside of limited wants this, since it feels aggressive but kind of requires a lot of mana to make use out of. There’s some real cleverness to it, but I just don’t know where it goes.

@shandylamb - Consuming Marsh

You asked, and yes, this fits the bill. This card compares very favorably to Hissing Quagmire. gaining haste and dropping the cost but instead sacrificing a creature, which on its own isn’t a fair trade, but having the land itself enter more than makes up for it. In fact, it makes up for it a bit too much. Any land that enters the battlefeld untapped unconditionally already has some power concerns, but tapping for two different colors of mana and being able to turn into a creature pushes this way over the edge. That said, in a world where lands were allowed to be a little stronger than basics, I could see this being a very cool, fun, good card. Deathtouch and haste is a good way to get through board stalls, which is when sacrificing a creature is easiest. If it weren’t for power level, I think this card easily could have made it into the runner ups.

@shootingstarhunter - Soiled Spirit

I’m down with this bog. I like the tap condition (I would have been fine if you put the Morbid ability word on it) to power it down just a little, but still comes into play tapped if played on turn one or two. I like how powerful that last ability is, letting you slowly accumulate counters over time until you’re ready. I like how it still needs some building around, since you need to find a way to kill a creature before combat. I think in the deck that wants this, it’ll be a fun, good enough card, but requires enough to go your way that it’s not too powerful. I think it’s a nice card, but I do wish it had a bit more of an out if you’re going against hard control or something else creature light  and counter heavy. I think this guy would end up stranded in play pretty often. Though thanks for making it a may! You were one of the few who caught that.

@snugz - Blackgrove Bastion

So, if you’re really flooding, you can use lands in hand to turn lands in play into big beaters. Honestly, you could have just stopped there. I don’t think having to bounce the land is necessary. You’ve already discarded a card, paid for the fortification, turned your land into removal bait, and risked your creature in combat. The fact that you can’t even tap it for mana without it bouncing is rough, too. I think you could afford to drop that ability or turn the equip into a mana cost and be fine. I appreciate the haste concern.

@socialpoison - Garom, the Loamwarden

I know plant thing when I see him. I like how this is a new type of land animation that plays on a few angles. If you ignore everything else, he’s a 5/5 for 5 that you can basically regernerate by paying 2 or more and sacrificing a land. I also like how it keeps getting pricier everytime you do it so he’s not too tough to kill, but he can make that cheaper, though even with that I think you didn’t need to up the price THAT much. It’s already pretty difficult to make sure it dies when you have mana open, I don’t think you also need to punish players who take advantage of its main mechanic. The flavor of him coming back is really cool, too. At first I didn’t really understand the last ability, but I get that it’s a way to offset the fact that you keep turning your land into creatures and having them die. It’s a little hard to judge how powerful that ability is on its own considering it’s a free sac outlet and graveyard recursion, but only for the weakest permanent type. Newer players might also think that they could return the land they sacrificed, but on a mythic (though I think this would be fine at rare) I think it’s fine to be a little counterintuitive. Altogether it’s a cool card, but for a legendary mythic I kind of expected something a little bolder.

@starch255 - Iotrene, Vengeful Arbor

So what if Urborg was alos dryad arbor? I’m not a judge (well, not that kind) so I’m just going to pretend that it will never cause rules problems. At least none of the effects take place in zones other than the battlefield. Anyway, the card itself seems... just kind of bad? It seems really risky to turn all of your lands into very tiny easily killable creatures, and if you’re not mono-green, then you’re just turning some of your lands into 1/1s. I think it has combo potential, but I don’t think this card is worth the headache to play. Points for trying though, your execution is perfect, no formatting issues I can see and you even got the reminder text in there! 

@teaxch - Stalking Hemlock

What if Kamahl was a Stronghold Assassin? I actually like all of the intersections of abilities on this card and how many options it gives. Four mana and tap to sac a land/creature to kill a land/creature is cool from a design stanpoint, but it’s really hard for me to approve of repeatable land destruction in standard. This is one of those “if it survives, I win, if it dies, I don’t” that reminds me of cards like Mercurial Chemister and WAR Nissa. I think that makes it tough for this to see play in competitive formats, and the land destruction angle makes it hard to play in casual formats. A very clever card, but I just don’t know what to do with it. The flavor text, however, would have gotten you into the winners circle alone if I didn’t have the fair’s reputation to uphold.

@thedirtside - Unhallowed Ground

I like the understated nature of this card. It starts off as just a guildgate, and the ability is a little tough to activate, being two colors and requiring a card in a graveyard, and the size of the creature is a little small, but altogether it comes off as a neat little uncommon. As I said in my example post, graveyard hate in the land slot is always nice, and this serves as a great way to punish slower graveyard decks like some of the god-pharoah’s gift decks in historic right now. Even at uncommon, I think this card could afford to be pushed just a little more, perhaps by making a bigger creature, because as is it’s hard to reason spending effectively 3 mana for a 2/2 for a turn compared to cards like mutavault and Mishra’s Factory. Still, not a bad card, I like what you’ve done.

@tmstage - Facsimilake

Love the pun. The card’s pretty good, too! I like how it’s got a bit of a pricey activation compared to a lot of landfolk, but this one definitely needed it. Five mana reanimation on a land is very strong (Atzal comes to mind), and the fact that it doesn’t exile the card means you can do it again next turn. I think the enchantment nature of the card does more harm than good in both design and play: the fact that your land can be erased for a single mana at instant speed is a nice downside to bring the power down a bit, but there are going to be some decks that ignore its activated ability entirely ad just play it as a constellation enabler. It just seems a little unnecessary, at least before it transforms. I also think you probably could have skipped the “still a land” and mana ability since it’s unlikely to become relevant unless something has gone terribly wrong, in which case it’s fine to punish reanimator players. So yeah, a little unfocused and overpowered, but a neat card that has potential.

@walker-of-the-yellow-path Spine of Lasai // Lasair the World Eater

Getting some very nice hideaway land vibes, but what if valakut? I like random red rares that are just like “sorry you didn’t burn them out, have a consollation” like Valakut and dragonmaster outcast. Big red is also always fun. So this is already looking very good! I like the flying 8/8 trample, I like how it being a land is flavorful but also sneakily lets it avoid some removal considering it’s a finisher, and I like that its ability ties into its flip condition. I kind of wish the front half weren’t legendary, but I know that feels really weird, but legendary lands are just always a bit of a bummer, especially tapped ones that don’t even act as one-of mana. Making it fetchable kinda evens that out, meaning that you can have just one in the deck but still have 8. Anyway, the real meat of it: that activate ability. I think it is way too strong outside of multiplayer. If you do nothing but play mountains and this card, you can win as soon as it flips by tapping all of your mountains to pay for themselves and dealing 21 to your opponent’s face. I know that doesn’t make it that much stronger than valakut, but valakut is a broken card. I think if the mana cost was even just two mana this card might be fine. That’s my only problem with the card. otherwise I love it.

-

That’s all folks! See you at some point in the future

-Mod Mr. ShinyObject

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #317

i’m tired as a motherfucker and don’t feel like thinking up some lyrics, so here, jus have the survey.

Have you volunteered in the past 6 months? No. French fries or onion rings? French fries. I don't like onion rings. Do you suffer from anxiety? Very badly. Favorite healthy snack? "Apples and peanut butter are one of them." <<<< Same, actually. Good shit. Favorite Disney movie? Forever and always The Lion King. If you see a bee in your house.. are you going to kill it? I hate to say it, but I'm killing it. Do you normally take a shower in the morning or at night? Morning. Do you have a cat? Yeah. What is your favorite animal? It will always be meerkats. Always. Do you know what time you were born? 10:30 AM, I believe. Do you like McDonalds? I'm gonna be real: I've never understood the McDonald's hate. I enjoy it perfectly fine. I mean it's certainly not gourmet, but I'll choose it over other fast food places sometimes. It's cheap and decent food, imo. What's your favorite flower? Orchids. Have you thought about joining the military? FUCK no. Who is the person that has impacted your life the most? Given my PTSD, I think it's pretty obviously Jason. Have you ever had a pet fish? Yeah, but not a lot. I never enjoyed them much. Have you ever wanted to be on a game show? Not seriously, no. I wouldn't want to be on television. Have you ever vaped? Nah. Who was the last person to give you a hug? Either my niece or nephew. Have you ever been on TV? I don't think so, no. What's your favorite store in the mall? Hot Topic, ugggghhhhh take me there. Has anyone ever told you that you have an accent? Yeah, especially when I was younger when I definitely did have a clear Southern accent. Do you have any piercings? Yeah, six. I have been DYING for a new one lately... How did your parents meet? Work. What was your first word? "Dada." Do you eat more healthy food or junk food? Somewhere in the middle, I'd say. What do you spend too much money on? When it's my own money, tattoos. I think I'll be perfectly capable of doing it, but when I'm employed, I'm going to have to watch how much I invest into those. What is a disturbing episode of an otherwise non-disturbing show? What is a disturbing show (or one you would describe as one) is enjoyable to you? Meeeh I don't watch enough for this. What is the most memorable song in a movie? How about a show? Oh wow, I dunno. "Circle of Life" from TLK is a beauty, as is "Strangers Like Me" from Tarzan. There really are a lot. As for shows, "Carry On My Wayward Son" from Supernatural will immediately get fans screaming the lyrics, haha. However, I don't know if that song properly counts since it wasn't written just for the show, but whatever. What is something you’re grateful for that humans have made/have continued to make exist? What about something that you wish that humans didn’t destroy? The Internet, whew. I wish humans would stop destroying the fucking environment. It's heartbreaking how many woods are wiped away here for construction, only to never be built on... While evil men are commonly talked about, what woman would you consider the most evil? I don't know, but it would probably be a rapist or pedophile. Those are probably the people I abhor most. Do you believe children can be evil? If so, what child from history do you believe to have been the most evil? I don't really think children are born evil, no. I've never heard of a diabolical baby or anything. I think the environment they are raised in molds them as they age. I don't know about the last question. Name one way that music can be bad for humans. It can be depressing sometimes, actually dragging your mood down, especially if you already feel low. What has been one of the most blatant advertising in a movie, show, or music video? Some of these questions are hard man, idfk lol. What book have you read/listened to that “messed you up” (or made you have a lot of negative feelings afterward)? Johnny Got His Gun left me feeling so spiteful towards and disappointed in the world. It definitely made me feel down for a while. If you have a pet, what is the best thing that you have for them (either a toy, a highly rated food, etc)? If you don’t have one but would like one, have you thought about what you would get your pet? We definitely don't have the money for "high quality" stuff. What works, works. Did you ever know anyone who was (previously) a part of a cult? What cult? Were you ever a part of one? No. What is something that is legal right now that really shouldn’t be? I'm stealing the previous person's answer by saying fireworks. They have a horrible effect on animals and PTSD victims and is just litter and a fire hazard. What is a movie you consider successful/good that did not have high reviews? I'm not educated enough on movie rankings. When you met the person you now like, what happened? We hugged and cried a bit lmao. Did you realize anything today? No. What do you want to do today? It'd be nice to get off my ass and get Emerson's birthday pictures into Lightroom so Ashley can finally have them... Can you honestly say you’d risk your life for someone else? I know with certainty I would for some people. Could you forgive a boyfriend or friend who physically hurt you? Ha, nope, byyyyeee~ What’s the cutest thing someone’s ever done for you? Ugh... So one night when I was lying down to go to bed but also texting Jason, I was being playful and joked for him to sing me to sleep. He sent me a video for "The Mortician's Daughter" by Black Veil Brides (one of his favorite bands) and just pasted the lyrics, and I thought it was the cutest fucking thing ever. I went to bed listening to it and just smiling. It's why I just don't listen to it anymore. I shouldn't have even talked about it, soooo next question. What are the top five places you wish you could go before you die? Ummm South Africa, Yellowstone National Park, Germany, Alaska, and the Bahamas, maybe. How many tattoos would you like to have? I'm gonna be a fuckin mural. I want tats pretty much everywhere. What question do you hate to answer? "What do you like to do for fun?" What's your favourite animated or cartoon program? Fullmetal Alchemist. What do you think the greatest invention has been? Electricity. What's your favourite movie quote? I dunno, I don't really have one. Do you prefer digital or analogue clocks? Analogue clocks are way more elegant and can be beautifully decorated. Who is your favorite foreign singer/musician? Do you translate his or her lyrics? If you exclude English-speaking foreign bands, like from the UK, Rammstein for sure. I can translate some of them. Say something in a foreign language? "Liebe" means "love" in German. What is a weather-type that you like that not many others do? Snow, for sure. I've never understood the "ew, snow" type of people. It's so pretty. Granted, it's rare here, so it's more of a treat down here, but still. Who do you know personally that has a nice singing voice? Sara has a beautiful voice. What was the last word you learned? I have no clue, given how bad my memory is becoming... It's hard for me to learn anything nowadays, because it doesn't stick. What is your favorite culture? (that you find most interesting): I'll be honest, I'm not very well-informed on foreign cultures. Due to taking so many classes though, I do find German culture to be quite appealing. They are very serious about honesty (for example, telling someone you're okay when you're not is frowned upon in small talk, even), as well as manners. I would love to experience their lifestyle. Have you ever watched anime porn? I've never watched porn to begin with. If you got paid $3 million to smoke meth one time would you do it? Nope. I'm not risking addiction or death. Are ladybugs cute? Yesssss. Will you leave the house without fragrance on? Yeah, I usually do. Do you make good money doing what you do? I'm unemployed. I've only ever worked minimum wage jobs. What is your favorite fruit? Strawberries, yum. And kiwi. What do you think of horses? I love them! Are you doing something with your life that matters? Ugh, I don't feel like it. Do you like gravy on your mashed potatoes? I hate gravy. What is the dirtiest rap song you have ever heard? Nicole played "WAP" once when I was in the car and I wanted to die. What about a dirty song in any other genre? "Bitches" by Hollywood Undead MIGHT be rap, but idk? What even is their genre???? But anyway, as much as I love the song, it's dirty as shit. What is a genre of music you simply can't stand? Rap, generally. What is, in your opinion, the best way of dealing with a break up? Lots and lots of self-care and focusing on loving yourself and realizing your worth lies in yourself and not another person. What flavor of Doritos do you like best? Cool Ranch, of course. Would you ever go to a comedy club? Yeah, sure. Why is it that photography is becoming a trend? Because it's art, and people enjoy art???????? What is the funniest movie you have ever seen? White Chicks gets me way harder than it should lmao. Would you ever consider dating someone who lived across the country? I guess, so long it was the plan that we'd eventually move in together, and effort was being made to achieve that once we got pretty serious. Do you have a tattoo? If you do, describe the pain you went through when getting it done. Well, I have six, so I'll just talk about my first one, which was on my wrist. It really isn't bad, especially once you've adjusted to the pain. I think the best metaphor would be that it's like lightly pinching a cat scratch. Outlining is the worst part, imo. What is your favorite bookstore? I don't have one. Who was the last person to tell you that you were cute? I have no idea. When was the last time you had a fever? How high did it go? Oh, I couldn't tell you. Those are very rare for me. How many times do you think that you’ve truly been in love before? With who? Twice, with Jason and Sara. Do you prefer French kissing, or regular kissing more, and why? I mean, this depends on the mood as well as how serious we are. Have you ever been married before? How many times? No. Who do you know that gives the best hugs? Summer has always been a big, strong hugger like I am. Have you ever dated someone of the same gender before? Yeah. Who do you consider to be your hero? My mom. Who is your best friend? Tell us about them. Sara. She's a very caring, strong, creative, just overall amazing person who stands firmly for what she feels is right, and we can't forget about her incredible loyalty, nor her absolute adoration for animals, reptiles especially. How much did your car cost? I don't have my own car. What is the last picture you received on your phone of? Sara sent me a photo of Martha, her ball python. Do you have any friends that actually model? No. Do you keep condoms in your room? No, considering I have no reason to. Do you follow any special diet? (dairy free, vegetarian, gluten free etc.) No, but I desperately want to return to being vegetarian. Vegan would be even better, but I know I'm absolutely not capable of that. What is an appliance you don’t have, but would love to have? uhhhhh Which keys on your keyboard are worn out the most? My "a," "s," and "d" from gaming. If you could be any supervillain, which would you be? Ha, I could probably pull off Harley Quinn pretty easily. Though "super"villain sounds a bit strong for her. What’s the most historic thing that has happened in your lifetime? Either Covid or 9/11, probably. What’s the scariest non-horror movie? I personally think the idea behind Johnny Got His Gun is fucking terrifying. What’s the most amazing true story you’ve heard? More beautiful than "amazing," but whatever. I can't think of anything else. Jason's mother actually left his father to go back home to New York when he cheated on her, but he followed her all the way there, and they wound up reconciling and were very happily married since. They were a spectacular couple, and I miss them a lot. What brand are you most loyal to? I have no idea. It's hard to be loyal to any when you're not the one buying products. Where are you not welcome anymore? Well, speaking of him, probably Jason's house, haha... I feel that if I just showed up there, his parents would honestly be super happy to see me and want to catch up, but Jason, not so much. I doubt Colleen would welcome me into her house, either. What’s the most recent show you’ve binge-watched? Avatar: The Last Airbender w/ Sara. What’s a common experience for many people that you’ve never experienced? Just... adult stuff. Paying bills. Having a stable job. Passing their driver's test. What are some misconceptions about your hobby? We'll use forum roleplay here, in which case I know a very common misconception is that it's sexual in nature and is a kink. It's never been that for me. It's about building unique, complex characters in a vast universe of your creativity, meshing with other's. It's a beautiful thing to me. What’s the dumbest thing someone has argued with you about? Oh, I'm sure something with Mom... because she is absolutely never wrong. What’s the longest rabbit hole you’ve been down? Conspiracy theories on YouTube, aha... What odd smell do you really enjoy? I really enjoy the smell of lilacs, though I know people who think they smell too strong and/or just stink. If you had a HUD that showed three stats about any person you looked at, what three stats would you want it to show? Hm, interesting question. Maybe approachability, moral alignment, and mood. What is your favorite flavor of pop tart? I really like the chocolate sundae ones. Gum? I really like fruit-flavored gums, especially watermelon or strawberry. Last song you sang along to? I sang a bit to "Second Chance" by Shinedown. Are you fascinated by rivers? Yeah, sure. Streams, more specifically, because you can see the bottom and walk more safely in them. I love exploring those. Do you live near a volcano? No, and I plan on keeping it that way, haha. How big is the screen on your digital camera? I dunno, the normal size for a Canon? Do you find train whistles comforting? No. What bird is the cutest? Oh, that's so hard. I love the pastel-colored ones, and hummingbirds are like, universally cute. Are you scared to look at your own organs on x-ray or ultrasound? No, that's actually really cool. Do big eyes freak you out? On people? Generally, no. I tend to find them cute, actually, especially on girls, but I've definitely seen people with big eyes that instead look kinda creepy. Have you ever walked on a frozen lake/river? Hm, I'm actually not sure. I don't believe so, though. Have you ever held a real sword? No. Have you ever seen a tree over 100 years old? Uh, realistically, probably? That's not that old in the grand scheme of trees, is it? Do you feel uncomfortable at fancy restaurants? I can sometimes, yes. I feel very out-of-place.

[nomadicism]

I read that one posts. I agree with Sol. I think it's more likely that Dreamworks crunched the numbers, figured it wouldn't be profitable and just canned the project than them cancelling it because of a very small section of the internet. p1

“p2 Mecha is just a dying genre as a whole. Even in Japan, isekai has taken it's place and there are hardly any new mechas outside of Gundam. That's in Japan! In the west, mecha is even more niche of an interest and general audiences don't gravitate towards it. I don't think that any mecha movie wouldn't do well at the box office. I'm even worried about that Gundam movie bombing at the box office.”

Hi Anon, thank you for the Ask!

Yeah, I agree with Sol too—and at risk of repeating what I’ve said in other posts about the movie thing—it’s really hard to convey just how incredibly unlikely a property like Voltron or Robotech will ever be made into a live-action movie. It really is about the numbers, as it always has been. Since the 80s, there’s this whole persistent and stupid element of the cartoon industry that continues to delude itself that promises or interest from Hollywood will ever pan out. There are so many scripts sitting in production limbo, that it’s almost criminal.

No one wants to risk money on a live-action movie based on children’s media IP that won’t bring in rated PG-13 or R dollars from adults, and no one wants to risk repeating the 80s He-Man film. The exceptions are live-action films made from children’s media IP that are fully owned by the company paying to produce the movie. I’ve got more to say about the complexities of royalties, but that’s awfully long-winded when I get into it, and I’d rather be long-winded about giant robots. (◕ᴗ◕✿)

The topic of mecha genre dying out is what really interests me here. It’s a topic that I think about a lot, as the beginnings of the mecha genre had a lot of deep cultural time-and-place stuff behind it, even if the stories were just kids and teen boys hopping into a giant robot to beat up other giant robots and monsters, in what were essentially 30 minute long toy commercials.

Isekai will come-and-go as all genres do. It’s not a new genre, but right now the types of themes driving the isekai stories being made speaks to a lot of interesting things happening in the youth of Japan’s relationship with digital gaming and role-play escapism. It’s fascinating, even though the focus of the genre as it’s done today hasn’t really grabbed me in the same way that isekai of the 80s-90s did.

Mecha isekai exists, and it’s only a matter of time before someone either remakes Vision of Escaflowne, or does a more mecha-focused isekai story similar to Magic Knight Rayearth. I doubt anyone would revisit Aura Battler Dunbine, or Super Dimension Century Orguss, but an otaku can dream.

Before we can say the mecha genre is dying, let’s briefly skim over the genre trends of the past +40 years. Every decade or era of mecha anime has a trend that reflects cultural concerns built into it, in a way that I don’t think any other genre of animation can touch (until now, with Digital/Virtual/Fantasy RPG World Isekai).

Late 60s-70s was: Super Robot smashes monsters and alien robots

Mid-70s – early 80s was: Combining Mecha Sentai Team Super Robot smashes monsters and alien robots

80s was: Real Robot + “how many sci-fi/fantasy settings can we put a robot into?” + the death-throes of Super Robot (e.g. Dairugger XV, Golion, Baldios, Godmars)

Also 80s: What the hell was Super Dimension Fortress Macross about? Cold war tensions of escalating end-the-world arms race meets an alien species whose only culture is fighting. Where songs about love, and the culture of love, are what win the day, not just transforming robots and big guns. Macross is deeper than it lets on.

Fun 80s: GoShogun happened. The first parody-satire mecha anime that still feels more serious than they intended, but is actually hilarious once you get past the dated gender roles humor (which was also kind of intentional satire).

WTF 80s: Space Runaway Ideon broke everyone’s minds.

Still not done with 80s: Gunbuster happened. The first angst-driven parody-satire mecha anime that blew everyone’s minds.

Late 80s-early 90s OVA mecha was a mix of Serious Cyberpunk-influenced Real Robot for older teens and adults + Mecha with Tits & Tentacles for Adults (see also space elf lesbians).

90s was: The Franchises Will Survive With Prettier Pilots, and Super Angst-Bot That Was Way More Influenced By Drugs And Ideon’s Ending Than Anyone Wants To Admit (aka Neon Genesis Evangelion) + “Since Gunbuster was a success, how many parodies of Super Robot and Real Robot can we do?”

Mid 90s isekai gems: Magic Knight Rayearth and Vision of Escaflowne

Late 90s: Brain-Powerd (not a typo) happened and it’s a shame no one remembers it. I’ve seen it’s influence come up in the 2000s – 2010s.

The 00s seem to be filled with a lot of re-treading of everything that came before but with different cross-genre influences and some of it really damn good but hard to remember because it all kind of blends together.

The 2010s-today: I have no idea what’s happening now b/c I can’t keep up with anything that isn’t Gundam. And why bother when there has been a flood of classic 70s-80s mecha releases—many for the first time in the US—to binge watch?

Knights of Sidonia was cool.

Since I haven’t kept up, I can’t speak to what new mecha anime is like, or why it's less popular (though I have an educated guess). It was gonna happen eventually, and I suspect that the kinds of post-nuclear and Cold War existential dread that informed mecha anime of the 60s-80s has moved on as target audiences grew up. Those lates 80s OVAs, where the stories could be more adult, reflect that growing up (and also Blade Runner’s influence).

I see the 90s as very transitional, includes reactions to the prior eras, but also reflects a lot of angst by Japanese teens and young adults caught up in the after-effects of 80s stagnation, and the constant test-studying to get into the best school to get the best job (if it exists) and figure it all out before you’re 14 so you can pick the best school to test into. Also, salary-man dad works 120 hours a week and is never home. Get in the Angst-bot Shinji.

Excluding the stand-out brands that survived their respective eras: Gundam, Macross, Braves series, Mazinger Z, Getter Robo, Evangelion; there’s not much other ground that can be covered right now that would warrant a series. The franchise mecha shows are grounded in their respective niches. It’s kind of odd that there isn’t an isekai mecha franchise, b/c that’s a niche that hasn’t been owned in the way that the other niches have (unless maybe Machine Hero Wataru is still a Thing?)

It’s worth mentioning that Sport Anime has really been having a moment for almost a decade now, and that’s super interesting to compare against isekai. Isekai about dungeon slimes or whatever vs literal horse-girls racing each other like high-school track. Thanks Japan, are y’all all right over there?

A few last things:

The success of Super Robot Wars tells me that mecha genre isn’t dying. Consider the ages of players. How many of them actually grew up watching Yuusha Raideen (aka Yūsha Raideen / Raideen the Brave)? There is an SRW manga anthology series, and loads of gachapon and collector’s grade mecha figures from old mecha anime get released with regularity. Someone’s buying that all that shit.

SRW is nearly 20 years old now, and they are still making video games that do one thing really well: rotate a 40 year old cast of everyone’s favorite robots into a battle strategy game held together by a duct-tape plot that doesn’t take itself too seriously. The games are fun, and it’s cool to put all these mecha into the same field. It’s really great to see older shows that will never be remade have little cut scenes in a newer animation style that still feels like the originals.

There’s also the old staple that started it all: the tokusatsu genre of live-action Super Sentai shows (e.g. Power Rangers). They’ve been making the Super Sentai Series since 1975, and there’s still fun to be had watching color-coded warriors use special powers/tech to summon forth some combining mecha to do battle with rubber suit monsters from outer-space. The effects are much better these days, but it’s the same formula, year after year and people still love it.

So with respect to mecha, I think what’s died or dying, is that people are afraid to have shameless child-like fun with giant robots. The genre got too serious and too angsty (and too horny without the grown-up edge of 80s OVA Tits & Tentacles mecha). The franchises carved their niches and aren’t going anywhere, while the genre survives in video games and collectables.

A lot of that shameless fun has moved into other genres, because nothing else explains a title like: “Is It Wrong To Pick Up Girl’s In The Dungeon?” or the nearly-ecchi concept behind the sports anime “Keijo!!!!!”. But that kind of fun is less child-like and more self-deprecating or pervy-humor. Both sports and isekai anime have their serious side, but seem to be dominated by stories that don’t take themselves too seriously, or like Yuri on Ice, aren’t afraid to take a concept that no one ever saw coming, and shape it into a good story.

I eagerly await a mecha sports anime (wait, no, I think that already happened), and I’d love to see a knock-out isekai mecha anime again. I think it will happen eventually, but probably not from Toei or Sunrise. If Tatsunoko could get beyond Moe Idols In Space, then the Macross franchise already has everything it needs to do a isekai series. That would be rad.

[aceandaroacts]

On Being a Happy Family of One

[This month, I'm hosting the Carnival of Aces, a blogging festival where participants respond to a topic. The topic I've chosen for this month is "Conscious and Unconscious Differences". You can see the other submissions and join in here!]

Considering the experiences you’ve had that are tied to your asexuality, how have they made you stronger?

Hi! I'm aceandaroacts. If you met me in real life, I'd introduce myself as a coder of custom software and grandma-at-heart. But this is the internet!

The most important thing to know about me is not the things I've built, places I've gone, or the experiences I've overcome. It's my attitude: "I can do this!"

When I first started thinking about topics to write about for this month's Carnival of Aces, I was torn between several ideas. I love fashion. I understand none of it, and never know what I'm doing, but I have fun with it and am trying to figure out how to be more... visible? as one of the few agender people at my company. I also have a cool history with being forced to dress like a Gothic nun half my life and building cosplays and cool Halloween costumes in the present half. But that felt a little too intersectional, and might not be as useful from an academic lens.

I thought about cryptography, clandestine communication, and the obsession with language and selective secrecy I had as a kid, and how that connects to a lot of ace symbols - the black ring on the middle finger, ace cards, cake, dragons... and how I wound up spending two months and hundreds of hours consuming all the ace content I could find, because words and language and symbols are so important!

And I thought about my life; how it compares to the default narrative, and how I'm going about building my own.

This month's theme is conscious and unconscious differences. Unconscious, as in automatic, or as in: before I knew I was asexual. Conscious, as in: intentional. It's broad enough to wrap around all the above, but specific enough in the "how does this make you stronger" bit that I think we'll still see some cool patterns and strengths arise that help to establish our own narrative tropes.

I bought "unsexy" conservative outfits before I know I was asexual. I avoided people that showed too much interest in me automatically. I unconsciously avoided conversations about dating, sex, attraction, and masturbation with friends by walking away or changing the topic. My favorite colors have always been purple, silver, black, and white. Strategy games were my favorite. I'd obsess over characters that were mysterious, building all kinds of different backstories and futures for them in my head. I never had sleepovers, and didn't understand why people would want them. I was the "lone wolf" in my friend groups - a drifter that got along pretty well with all kinds of people, but ultimately did whatever they wanted with or without company. Around 60% of my friends were adults; I had great relationships with the teachers and staff members at my school, and I knew all the local librarians by name. The gender split of my friend group was always pretty close to 50-50, and populated with extremely different perspectives - punk anarchists, exchange students, female football players, native american sci-fi enthusiasts, anorexic wrestlers, etc. I loved words, loved codes and ciphers, loved fiction, nonfiction, poetry, and music with lyrics. I avoided drama like the plague. I had a very unstable home life, and moved locations almost every year. Home only extended as far as to the skin on my body. I never dreamed about weddings or fancy houses or kids (or even pets!). P.E. (Physical Education) was the worst - I felt uncomfortable in the dressing rooms, so I would arrive early before people started undressing and would change in the restrooms so I would have privacy and avoid seeing naked people as much as possible. I never obsessed over my body - I could go for months at a time without looking in a mirror. My reputation was based on my academics and random hobbies, not my looks or relationships. People sought me out as a mentor and constantly told me I was "mature" and "an old soul". When fights broke out, people looked to me as a fair and impartial judge of the situation, and respected whatever verdict I reached. It felt a lot like being a Buddha!

Realizing I was asexual didn't change much of that, but it did cause me to face choices head-on: would I try to find a partner, or not? Would I try to live with other roommates, or not? Would I try to be attractive, or not? Would I go to bars to make friends, or not? Would I worry about having a weak social network, or not? Would I want to live in a retirement community, or not? Would I want kids around, or not? What would my milestones in life be? How would I fulfill my human need to be social? Who would I trust to take care of me in an emergency?

I'm estranged from my birth family. I'm asexual, aromantic, agender, touch-averse, romance-repulsed, sex-repulsed, and introverted as can be. I tried dating and was so miserable that I wound up finding asexuality because of it in the first place. I don't trust myself to be a parent since my own parents screwed up so badly that it left me with three mental illnesses and a decade's worth of unwinding bad life lessons. So I'm in a fun position!

The "normal" life journey story goes like this: You grow up with two loving biological parents, get your education, graduate, get further training or education via school or a first job, find your partner in life, get into a steady career, get married and live together, have kids, raise those kids, watch them get their education and jobs and move away, then retire and die at an old age. My life only has the education and job bits (retirement? in this economy? die old? on this polluted planet?). I'm not going to look for a lifelong partner. I'm not having kids or adopting. There's a whole lot of white space where everyone else has milestones, and I've consciously accepted that as okay. I'm a family of one, and it's great!

The first milestones I set for myself were to find good roommates, help out fellow child abuse survivors, and own a home. I've achieved them! My next milestone is to do something big and artsy that makes a decent amount of people happy. I have no idea what it will be, yet - right now I've been doing lots of little things: teaching workshops, building costumes, painting, home renovation projects. I'm gonna try being in a music band this year. The milestone after that will be to have a big impact via a community-service type initiative. There's a woman in my city that created an LGBTQ homeless shelter that's an actual home-like environment (seasonal housing with free counseling, job training, stocked pantry, etc. aimed at guiding people to independence and self-sufficiency) which I thought was really cool, and I'd like to do something that's on a similar scale. After that, who knows? Maybe publish a book instead of writing 12 of them and letting them collect dust? Maybe run a small rainbow-themed cafe that makes fancy desserts? So many possibilities!

It's exactly these differences that bleed into my strengths. I'm super independent/self-motivated/self-directed, because I've had to be to survive. I excel at navigating uncertainty, ambiguity, assessing risks, and forecasting outcomes and trends, because my life has a lot of uncertainty and risk compared to the average population. I'm quick to pick up on communication styles and tailor my messages accordingly, because I've had to be mindful about it when navigating my parents and people that developed crushes on me and/or became stalkers. My superpower at work is my ability to dodge all of the politics at play and get everyone on board with factually beneficial solutions (so I still come across as an objective party vs someone playing favorites or only looking out for themselves). People have faith that I'm an expert in all things IT, even when I mess up, because I ask good questions and make fewer assumptions. (I assumed I was cis for 22 years and surprise! I was wrong. Anyone can be wrong. Especially if they are never forced to think about the thing!) I'm great at organizing live events - I plan multiple award shows and get-togethers. I also run an ace & aro meetup in my city! (The experience of being isolated will make an organizer out of you real quick!) People seek me out as a mentor and coach at work because I'm already satisfied with my life and who I am, and I genuinely want to help others without expecting anything in return. I intentionally stay in touch with and work to expand my friend group, which means I have a great professional network of actual friends that I find interesting and fun to be around, and not just LinkedIn faces. If I weren't ace, I wouldn't be doing that. And if I still didn't know I was ace, I wouldn't be doing it half as much as I do now - when you really focus on it, it's so worth it!

So, yeah. Asexuality is a part of me, and it's great. How does your identit(y/ies) make you great?

[lovemesomesurveys]

What shows are you into? There’s several. I don’t feel like listing them. What’s your claim to fame? Uhh. I have no idea what people would know me best from or for.  Are you usually early or late? Early. I hate being late. How often do you people watch? Depends where I’m at.  What do you hope never changes? My family dynamic. 

What’s your dream car? I don’t have one. What songs have you completely memorized? There’s several. What job would you be terrible at? Any job I feel like. What skill would you like to master? I don’t know. What are you absolutely determined to do? I haven’t felt determined to do anything in awhile. ;/ What would you rate 10 / 10? It Chapter 2. Where would you rather be from? I like being from California. What’s your favorite drink? Coffee. What quirks do you have? *shrug* How often do you play sports? I don’t at all. What website do you visit most often? Tumblr. What movie title best describes your life? I don’t knowwww. What age do you want to live to? Blah. What takes up too much of your time? Worrying/stressing. What do you wish you knew more about? Life. How different was your life one year ago? Mostly the same, with some additions.  What’s the best single day on the calendar? December 25th. What are some things you’ve had to unlearn? Hmm. What’s your favorite genre of book or movie? For books I like YA/NA, contemporary, mystery, psychological thriller. For movies I like comedies, romantic comedies, dramas, psychological thriller, horror, some action, some sci-fi.  What’s the farthest you’ve ever been from home? Atlanta, Georgia. What TV channel doesn’t exist but really should? *shrug* Where is the most interesting place you’ve been? I’ve been to a few places I’d consider interesting. What fad or trend do you hope comes back? I’ve noticed a lot of 90s trends have and continue to come back, which is cool.  What’s the best way to start the day? Coffee. There’s no other way. What kind of art do you enjoy most? I like to color? What would your perfect room look like? Something cute and cozy. What fictional place would you most like to go? Derry, Maine. ha. What have you only recently formed an opinion about? Uhhh. What is the most heartwarming thing you’ve ever seen? Hard to say what the most heartwarming thing I’ve seen ever is, but recently my mom, brother, and I have been watching Serengeti, this wildlife documentary on Discovery (truly amazing, definitely would recommend!), and there’s this baboon, Bakari, who ends up taking in this baby baboon as his own after the mother was killed (who Bakari was in love with, but he and the leader had issues and he was kicked out the group, so they kinda snuck around together and he’d compete for her love) and it was just really sweet. He had no idea what he was doing as a single dad, but he just took the baby in and did what he had to do.  What’s something you like to do the old-fashioned way? Hm. I feel like I kinda am old fashioned with some things, but of course I’m failing to think of an example at the moment. Would you rather go hang gliding or whitewater rafting? Neither. Both sound terrifying.  Who has impressed you most with what they’ve accomplished? My younger brother. He’s 20 and already accomplished so much more than I have.  How do you relax after a hard day of work? I don’t work. All my days are spent mostly in bed doing the same few things. But don’t confuse that for relaxing. What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch? Hm. I can’t think of something I refuse to watch. Of course there’s stuff that just doesn’t interest me or that I think looks absolutely ridiculous, but I’m not outright refusing it. Where would you spend all your time if you could? At the beach. What would be your ideal way to spend the weekend? Relaxing at the beach. I actually wish I owned a beach home and could at least relax near the beach on my private balcony. What’s the best way a person can spend their time? Doing something they enjoy. What would be the most amazing adventure to go on? A Safari adventure. What pets did you have while you were growing up? Dogs and fish. What job do you think you’d be really good at? I don’t know. What’s the most interesting piece of art you’ve seen? Uhhh. Where is the most relaxing place you’ve ever been? The beach. What are you most likely to become famous for? Nothing. I don’t want to be famous either. What’s worth spending more on to get the best? I think stuff like computers, phones, cars... What age do you wish you could permanently be? I’d like to just stop aging now. What is special about the place you grew up? My family is here. Otherwise, I don’t like this city at all. What do you consider to be your best find? Hmm. When was the last time you climbed a tree? Never. What city would you most like to live in? I don’t know, but not this one. What is the luckiest thing that has happened to you? I don’t believe in luck. What’s the best thing that happened to you last week? I saw It Chapter 2 this past Friday. What’s your favorite piece of clothing you own / owned? All of them, which I have and keep them. I need to get rid of some, though. :( What is the most annoying question that people ask you? My previous pain specialist doctor always asked me about why I wasn’t working, what my plans were, and other stuff that just made me feel like crap and I hated it because I’m like, uh... you’re my doctor, you know what I’m dealing with and all my medical history. You should be more understanding. What is the most impressive thing you know how to do? Nothing. What was the best book or series that you’ve ever read? There’s been many. What is the most annoying habit that other people have? I hate when people feel the need to comment something negative on a post or YouTube video or something. Like they just feel compelled to leave something mean and nasty and I’m just like why? What are you looking forward to in the coming months? Cooler weather! What are some small things that make your day better? Coffee and silly, cute moments with my doggo. What one thing do you really want but can’t afford? A beach home, ha. What are you interested in that most people haven’t heard of? I’d say ASMR, but it’s becoming more well known now.  Why did you decide to do the work you are doing now? I’m not working. What state or country do you never want to go back to? I haven’t been anywhere that I wouldn’t want to go back to. What are you most looking forward to in the next 10 years? Blah. What game or movie universe would you most like to live in? Hmmm. If you suddenly became a master at woodworking, what would you make? I had a wood shop elective in like 6th grade and I made a dollhouse. Cool story, I know. What amazing thing did you do that no one was around to see? Nothing comes to mind. What hobby would you get into if time and money weren’t an issue? Travel. If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time? I’m glad for the time I sleep. I like sleep. Some days drag on long enough. When people come to you for help, what do they usually want help with? People don’t really come to me anymore for help. Where do you usually go when you when you have time off? All my time is time off and I spend majority of it at home. What question would you most like to know the answer to? I don’t know. Like, “will I ever get better” comes to mind, but I’m terrified of the answer so it’s best I don’t know. Unless the answer was yes, ha. What is something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives? Travel. What’s something you’ve been meaning to try but just haven’t gotten around to? I don’t know. What gets you fired up? People who abuse other people, especially children, and animals. What risks are worth taking? If it’s something that could have a positive, beneficial outcome for you or if it’s something you love. What do you take for granted? I don’t mean to, but I probably take my family for granted sometimes.  What do you have doubts about? My health and my life. What fact are you resigned to? Uhh. What book impacted you the most? The Bible.

What’s the best thing about you? Blahhhhh. What are you addicted to? Caffeine. When do you feel truly “alive”? When I’m at the beach is the only time I feel that way and actually feel relaxed. Who inspires you to be better? Sigh. What makes a good life? For me, personally, it would be having good health (mentally and physically). I think a lot of other things would follow if I had that. If all jobs had the same pay and hours, what job would you like to have? I. Don’t. Know. What irrational fear do you have? Killer whales is one of them. Have you ever saved someone’s life? I don’t think so. What’s the hardest lesson you’ve learned? A few of the things I’m dealing with could have been prevented, but I was stupid and stubborn and neglectful. What’s something you are self-conscious about? Everything. What is one of your favorite smells? The ocean air is one of many. What do you like most about your family? I have an amazing, loving, supportive, encouraging, caring, and funny af family. They’re the best. What is the “holy grail” of your life? I want better health. Have you ever given to any charities? Yes. What’s the last adventure you went on? The gondola ride that took us up 9,000 ft was pretty adventurous for me. I did that on my birthday. What are three interesting facts about you? If any of you have been reading my surveys long enough you know enough about me by now and know I’m not very interesting. What was the best compliment you’ve received? Hm. What chance encounter changed your life forever? Ty always comes to mind with questions like this. What do you want your epitaph to be? I’ll be cremated, so. What do you want to be remembered for? I guess it doesn’t matter. What is something you will NEVER do again? Probably drink alcohol. I mean, it’s impossible, but as of now I have no desire at all. What are you most likely very wrong about? I don’t know. What stereotype do you completely live up to? People who don’t understand mental health and chronic issues I’m sure think I’m just lazy. What dumb accomplishment are you most proud of? I got an awesome collection of giraffe stuffed animals. ha. Not dumb to me, but I’m sure people think for a 30 year old it’s lame but I don’t care.  What was the most memorable gift you’ve received? Many throughout my life. What is the biggest lesson you never learned? Uh. What’s the most immature thing that you do? I’m a big baby. Who is / was your most interesting friend? Ty was. What do people think is weird about you? A lot of things, I’m sure. What chapters would you separate your autobiography into? I have no idea. My life is boring. What do you hope your last words will be? Not something I’ve thought about. What do you spend the most time thinking about? My health and my life in general. What is something you can never seem to finish? All my food most of the time. Except for sandwiches. What mistake do you keep making again and again? Health related things. What’s the best thing you got from your parents? They’ve given me a lot of things throughout my life. What is the strangest thing you have come across? I don’t know. What would a mirror opposite of yourself be like? There’d be a happy, confident, outgoing, healthy person. What’s the best and worst thing about getting older? Getting old sucks, man. What would be the scariest monster you could imagine? The depression monster. What is something you are certain you’ll never experience? Good health, a love life, real happiness... What challenging thing are you working through these days? Health stuff like I’ve mentioned several times. What’s one responsibility you really wish you didn’t have? Bills. What do you wish your brain was better at doing? Producing serotonin.  If your childhood had a smell, what would it be? The smell of Playdoh always reminds me of childhood. I was obsessed with Barbies, but that doesn’t have a smell. Perhaps maybe crayons and sunshine as well. Big shocker: I actually spent a lot of time playing outside as a kid.  In your group of friends, what role do you play? I don’t have a group of friends. Which of your scars has the best story behind it? Majority are surgery related, but there’s a few others from different things. What have you created that you are most proud of? I make pretty bowls of Ramen. ha. What were some of the turning points in your life? There have been a lot.

“Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road...” What bends your mind every time you think about it? There’s a lot of fascinating things. What is something that your friends would consider “so you”? People associate me with giraffes, coffee, the beach, fall, and Alexander Skarsgard. What’s something horrible that everyone should try at least once? Uh, I don’t know? If you had a personal flag, what would be on it? Nah. As the only human left on Earth, what would you do? Go insane. What stat for your life would you most like to see? None. What did you think you would grow out of but haven’t? Hmm. What are three of the most significant numbers in your life? I’ve always liked the number 8. What’s the best and worst piece of advice you’ve ever received? Blah. What song or artist do you like but rarely admit to liking? I’m not ashamed of any of the music I like. What annoys you most about the in-groups you are a part of? I’m not apart of any groups. What small gesture from a stranger made a big impact on you? I have no idea. I don’t interact much with strangers. What are some of your personal “rules” that you never break? I drink coffee everyday. That’s very important, ha. If your life was a book, what would its title be? I have one, but it’s a play on words of my last name and I don’t want to share that. Among your friends or family, what are you famous for? I’m not famous for anything. What’s the title of the current chapter of your life? Perhaps trials and tribulations. What do you strongly suspect but have no proof of? Uhhh. What do you regret not doing or starting when you were younger? I just wish I took better care of myself and didn’t neglect some things. I wish I took some things more seriously and others less seriously. As you get older, what are you becoming more and more afraid of? Losing my parents and never getting better/getting worse. In what situation or place would you feel the most out of place in? I feel out of place in life. What personality trait do you value most and which do you dislike the most? About myself or others? For myself, I will say I like my sense of humor and that I’m a child at heart. Wow, I found something positive to say about myself. As for dislike, that’s much a longer list. What would you do if you knew you were going to die in one hour? I would spend it with family, but also being incredibly sad and scared. What are some of the events in your life that made you who you are? Everything? If life is a game, like some people say, what are some of the rules? It. Goes. On. Time doesn’t stop for anyone. It doesn’t play by your rules. There are two types of people in this world. What are the two types? Is there, though? What lifestyle change have you been meaning to make for a while now? I need to take steps towards improving some things about myself and working on things, but I haven’t.  What question can you ask to find out the most about a person? About their interests.

What can you not get right, no matter how many times you try? This thing called life. When people look at you, what do you think they see / think? Yikes. If you had to change your name, what would you change it to? I’ve had my name for 30 years, I think I’ll keep it. What’s the dumbest thing you’ve done that actually turned out pretty well? I can’t think of anything.

[eldritchsurveys]

381.

What shows are you into? >> The shows that I’m watching right now are The Strain, Hannibal (rewatch), The X-Files (rewatch), and I have M.A.S.H. as my current “mealtime entertainment” show. I think I’ve given up on Grey’s Anatomy, at least for the time being, because I’ve gotten more than a little weary of the romance stuff. (You can kind of see where my mind is at right now considering what I am currently watching, lmao... not to mention I was previously watching Mindhunter and The Act...) Also, Derek Shepherd just died and I really don’t feel like wading through a bunch of grief-related subplots. What’s your claim to fame? >> I have no idea. Are you usually early or late? >> I’m more likely to be too early than too late. How often do you people watch? >> As often as I’m in a place where people-watching is actually entertaining. What do you hope never changes? >> I don’t think I have any business hoping for anything to stay exactly the same forever.

What’s your dream car? >> --- What songs have you completely memorized? >> I have so many songs memorised. What job would you be terrible at? >> What job wouldn’t I be terrible at in some way... What skill would you like to master? >> There aren’t any I’m really into the idea of mastering right now. What are you absolutely determined to do? >> Continue to be truer to myself and the kind of life I want to live. What would you rate 10 / 10? >> I don’t know. Where would you rather be from? >> ??? What’s your favorite drink? >> Jasmine green tea with honey. What quirks do you have? >> Oh, who knows. How often do you play sports? >> I don’t. What website do you visit most often? >> tumblr, most likely. What movie title best describes your life? >> I can’t even begin to imagine what movie title would come close to describing my life. Or any life. What age do you want to live to? >> It’s not quantity of life that I’m into so much as quality of life. Of course I’d like to live through middle age and see what it’d be like to be proper old, but if that comes with a slew of health conditions and infirmities then I’m not too sure about that. But-- who knows, actually. Maybe I’ll still carry on rather well even with all of that. Maybe when it comes down to it, it wouldn’t be as bad as I think. All in all, I don’t think that it’s rational for me to try and predict how I’d feel about being a certain age or living to a certain age, and there’s no real point in thinking about it either. I’ll live until I die, and that’s that. What takes up too much of your time? >> I don’t think anything takes up too much of my time. What do you wish you knew more about? >> It’s more that I wish I had the drive to focus on specific things long enough to become an expert in them. But I have the mind of a dilettante, not a specialist. How different was your life one year ago? >> Not very. What’s the best single day on the calendar? >> I have no idea. What are some things you’ve had to unlearn? >> Self-punishment, defense mechanisms, certain thought patterns and behaviours that I adopted as a homeless person in a metropolis, that sort of thing. What’s your favorite genre of book or movie? >> I don’t have a specific one. I do seem to gravitate towards psychological thrillers and space epics when it comes to movies, though. What’s the farthest you’ve ever been from home? >> --- What TV channel doesn’t exist but really should? >> We really don’t need more TV channels. Where is the most interesting place you’ve been? >> I have no idea. There’s something interesting about almost everywhere I’ve been. What fad or trend do you hope comes back? >> --- What’s the best way to start the day? >> I like to start mine with some fun music. What kind of art do you enjoy most? >> I’m not sure. What would your perfect room look like? >> A little bigger than this one, and maybe with a bigger window...? I don’t believe in a “perfect” anything, I’m just happy to have a room of my own that is comfortable and clean. What fictional place would you most like to go? >> I have no idea. What have you only recently formed an opinion about? >> I don’t know. What is the most heartwarming thing you’ve ever seen? >> *shrug* What’s something you like to do the old-fashioned way? >> I’m not sure. Would you rather go hang gliding or whitewater rafting? >> Hang-gliding. Who has impressed you most with what they’ve accomplished? >> I think a lot of people’s accomplishments are impressive to some degree, because life can be hard, but there’s nothing that really sticks out to me. How do you relax after a hard day of work? >> --- What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch? >> Just anything I’m not interested in, I guess.  Where would you spend all your time if you could? >> I wouldn’t want to spend all my time in one place. That’s the quickest way to dissatisfaction for me. What would be your ideal way to spend the weekend? >> I don’t have an ideal way. Most weekends are fine. What’s the best way a person can spend their time? >> --- What would be the most amazing adventure to go on? >> I don’t know. There are way too many superlative questions in this survey. What pets did you have while you were growing up? >> I had dogs. What job do you think you’d be really good at? >> I’m not sure. I think I would make a good bartender skill-wise, but bars are noisy and hectic and not altogether tidy places, so that’d be a problem. I think that’s the thing with jobs, for me -- it’s not necessarily the job itself that I would be awful at dealing with, but the environment and social elements. What’s the most interesting piece of art you’ve seen? >> I couldn’t say. Where is the most relaxing place you’ve ever been? >> *sigh*... What are you most likely to become famous for? >> I don’t want to be famous for anything. What’s worth spending more on to get the best? >> Anything you end up using at least weekly, unless it’s meant to be replaced often. What age do you wish you could permanently be? >> No thanks. What is special about the place you grew up? >> I don’t know what’s special about it. What do you consider to be your best find? >> --- When was the last time you climbed a tree? >> I have never really climbed a tree. What city would you most like to live in? >> I actually don’t know at this time. It’ll probably be a couple of years at least before I start doing any real research on that possibility. What is the luckiest thing that has happened to you? >> I couldn’t say. I have had a lot of lucky things happen to me. What’s the best thing that happened to you last week? >> Er. What’s your favorite piece of clothing you own / owned? >> I don’t know. What is the most annoying question that people ask you? >> --- What is the most impressive thing you know how to do? >> --- What was the best book or series that you’ve ever read? >> --- What is the most annoying habit that other people have? >> --- What are you looking forward to in the coming months? >> The NOLA trip. I know I’m ‘supposed’ to say “the wedding”, but that’s not really the exciting part for me, that’s the stressful part. Maybe it won’t feel like that when it actually happens, but it does now, so. What are some small things that make your day better? >> --- What one thing do you really want but can’t afford? >> --- What are you interested in that most people haven’t heard of? >> --- Why did you decide to do the work you are doing now? >> --- What state or country do you never want to go back to? >> --- What are you most looking forward to in the next 10 years? >> I don’t look ahead that far. What game or movie universe would you most like to live in? >> --- If you suddenly became a master at woodworking, what would you make? >> ... I’m not interested in woodworking, though, so that’d be a useless thing to grant me. At least grant me a skill I want to use. What amazing thing did you do that no one was around to see? >> Yesterday I took a shot at a garbage can from about 6 feet away and I made it. It was cool. What hobby would you get into if time and money weren’t an issue? >> --- If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time? >> --- When people come to you for help, what do they usually want help with? >> --- Where do you usually go when you when you have time off? >> --- What question would you most like to know the answer to? >> --- What is something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives? >> I don’t think everyone should do anything. What’s something you’ve been meaning to try but just haven’t gotten around to? >> Whatever it is, I’ve forgotten it now. What gets you fired up? >> I don’t know. Not much. What risks are worth taking? >> For me, I have no idea.  What do you take for granted? >> I eventually take everything for granted because I can’t possibly maintain a constant attitude of gratitude 24/7/365.  What do you have doubts about? >> Various ultimately-unimportant things. What fact are you resigned to? >> The fact that I just might not be a passionate person, and while that means I am certainly missing out on things that I can’t feel or experience, there’s no point in fuckin navelgazing about it. There are benefits to my experience, too -- just because they’re not talked about doesn’t mean they don’t exist. What book impacted you the most? >> *shrug* What’s the best thing about you? >> --- What are you addicted to? >> Nothing. When do you feel truly “alive”? >> I always feel alive. How else am I supposed to feel? Who inspires you to be better? >> No one. What makes a good life? >> *shrug* I know my life is good, and that’s all. If all jobs had the same pay and hours, what job would you like to have? >> The pay and hours aren’t the thing that needs to change for me to want a job... What irrational fear do you have? >> None. What would be your spirit animal? >> I don’t know. Have you ever saved someone’s life? >> Highly doubtful. What’s the hardest lesson you’ve learned? >> *shrug* What’s something you are self-conscious about? >> I’m very conscious of my general appearance because I’ve been made to be. What is one of your favorite smells? >> I don’t know, uh... ginger? That’s nice. What do you like most about your family? >> --- What is the “holy grail” of your life? >> --- Have you ever given to any charities? >> No. What’s the last adventure you went on? >> Well, we went to the zoo yesterday. That was kind of an adventure. What are three interesting facts about you? >> I can’t be bothered to think of one, let alone three. What was the best compliment you’ve received? >> --- What chance encounter changed your life forever? >> --- What do you want your epitaph to be? >> I don’t really care. It’s not my business anyway, I’ll be dead. What do you want to be remembered for? >> --- What is something you will NEVER do again? >> I can’t say. What are you most likely very wrong about? >> If I know I’m probably very wrong about something, why would I still be thinking it? What stereotype do you completely live up to? >> I don’t know, I never thought about it. What dumb accomplishment are you most proud of? >> If I’m proud of it, how the fuck is it dumb... What was the most memorable gift you’ve received? >> --- What is the biggest lesson you never learned? >> That... makes no sense... What’s the most immature thing that you do? >> There’s probably something, but I can’t think of anything right now. Who is / was your most interesting friend? >> --- What do people think is weird about you? >> I don’t know, man. What chapters would you separate your autobiography into? >> I don’t... know........ What do you hope your last words will be? >> Why would that even matter to me? By that point, my life -- and the entire concept of things “mattering” -- is over. What do you spend the most time thinking about? >> I’m not sure. Various things about characters, labyrinthine discussions that Can Calah and I have throughout the day, stuff like that, I guess. What is something you can never seem to finish? >> I don’t know. What mistake do you keep making again and again? >> I haven’t noticed any lately. What’s the best thing you got from your parents? >> --- What is the strangest thing you have come across? >> --- What would a mirror opposite of yourself be like? >> I can’t possibly have a mirror opposite. That would imply that I’m some kind of stock character who only has a handful of personality traits that do not ever conflict with each other. What’s the best and worst thing about getting older? >> For me, the best thing has been just... learning what not to give a fuck about. I have a markedly low number of fucks to give as it is, and I was always giving them away freely to the wrongest things and people. No wonder I was always stressed out. I don’t think there’s a worst thing. Like, yeah, my body is less tolerant of things like staying up all night and doing drugs, but those are definitely things I don’t need to be doing anymore anyway, so... still a benefit? What would be the scariest monster you could imagine? >> I can’t imagine one. What is something you are certain you’ll never experience? >> Whatever that romantic love thing is that everyone’s always on about. If it hasn’t happened by now, I fail to see what would make the future so drastically different that it’ll suddenly happen then. What challenging thing are you working through these days? >> I don’t know. I’m taking a break from constantly pushing myself to do things “better” or “more normal”, from that whole “self-improvement” grind that puts books on the bestseller list and makes “gurus” out of regular-ass people who are just good at exploiting insecurities, so I’m not really “working through” anything right now. And honestly, I’m finding I have a lot fewer “problems” than I thought I did, and I’m happier with myself than I thought I was. What’s one responsibility you really wish you didn’t have? >> --- What do you wish your brain was better at doing? >> I’m not sure. I complain about my brain, but honestly, it’s doing pretty damn well with the fucked-up toolkit it was given. I’m pretty proud of it, all told. If your childhood had a smell, what would it be? >> I don’t know, I don’t associate any particular smells with childhood. In your group of friends, what role do you play? >> I don’t know, I don’t have an actual group. Which of your scars has the best story behind it? >> None of them really have good stories. What have you created that you are most proud of? >> Various characters and fiction. What were some of the turning points in your life? >> I don’t think I can really say. I’m not sure I believe in “turning points” as is, either. That suggests there are certain moments where Everything Changes and Suddenly I Saw the Light and so on. Whereas, it rarely actually happens like that. Personal change happens behind the scenes, where I can’t witness it, and so slowly that it looks like nothing’s moving at all, until suddenly I look back over several years and go, “hunh. shit is different.” What bends your mind every time you think about it? >> Consciousness. What is something that your friends would consider “so you”? >> Being comically thirsty for villains and various eldritch beings. What’s something horrible that everyone should try at least once? >> --- If you had a personal flag, what would be on it? >> I’d like a personal Flagg, actually. *wheeze* As the only human left on Earth, what would you do? >> I don’t know. I’d require more information -- like what happened to everyone else, for example, and why it didn’t happen to me. What stat for your life would you most like to see? >> Meh. What did you think you would grow out of but haven’t? >> Surveys, definitely, lmao. What are three of the most significant numbers in your life? >> 9, 19, and 8. What’s the best and worst piece of advice you’ve ever received? >> --- What song or artist do you like but rarely admit to liking? >> I will never deny an artist or song I love. What annoys you most about the in-groups you are a part of? >> I don’t even know what in-groups I’m part of. I feel like I’m too contrarian for that. What small gesture from a stranger made a big impact on you? >> --- What are some of your personal “rules” that you never break? >> I don’t think I could have unbreakable rules. I’m more inclined to adaptation than to rigidity. If your life was a book, what would its title be? >> --- Among your friends or family, what are you famous for? >> --- What’s the title of the current chapter of your life? >> --- What do you strongly suspect but have no proof of? >> I can’t think of anything. What do you regret not doing or starting when you were younger? >> Nothing. As you get older, what are you becoming more and more afraid of? >> I don’t think anything like that exists for me. Yet, anyway. In what situation or place would you feel the most out of place in? >> I don’t know. Maybe if you plunked me down right in the middle of the Met Gala or something, lol. What personality trait do you value most and which do you dislike the most? >> Oh, I don’t know. What would you do if you knew you were going to die in one hour? >> I wouldn’t do anything, I guess. What am I possibly going to do in an hour that would make any difference? Maybe I’d just lay down, put on some music, and wait as patiently as I could.  What are some of the events in your life that made you who you are? >> Are there any events in my life that didn’t? If life is a game, like some people say, what are some of the rules? >> I don’t know, ask r/outside There are two types of people in this world. What are the two types? >> I’d put a meme here but I’m too lazy What lifestyle change have you been meaning to make for a while now? >> --- What question can you ask to find out the most about a person? >> How would I know? What can you not get right, no matter how many times you try? >> *shrug* When people look at you, what do you think they see / think? >> I really can’t even imagine. People have assumed or falsely interpreted things about me that have caught me completely off guard, so I guess anything goes. If you had to change your name, what would you change it to? >> I am done changing my name, lmao. (Legally, at least.) What’s the dumbest thing you’ve done that actually turned out pretty well? >> I don’t even know. Most of the dumb things I’ve done have turned out well eventually, seeing as I’m still here and have all my limbs and eyes and such-not.  

[inksparkcrafts]

Jewelry Making: Because this stuff may not be as intuitive as I thought.

So first and foremost this post is in response to/inspired by @lunar-rose-witch who originally tagged a request for help as "#jewelry making" and fully caught my attention, inspiring me to not only give her some quick pointers but start writing a full-on-post in my craft blog for the first time in years. (Also I looked back and half my response dissipated into the ether, sorry!

Also I’m going to buck craft blog trend a bit: The personal backstory will bring up the rear of this piece, so you can get to the juicy info right away. Hit the read more for the full speech.

MASSIVE EDIT: Not all the techniques in this post work for all styles of jewelry. This is for the typical, “like what you can buy in the store” type techniques, but there are specific techniques and styles that don’t quite match the most specific, technique- and supply-based info here just due to the nature of their creation. (for good examples, look at macrame hemp jewelry or kandi, a style making primary use of elastic, monofilament, and plastic beads) A lot of the more basic info works, though, I just wanted to cover that.

So here’s how I’m going to structure it: Quick explanation, and then a “high-end” and “budget” approach if it applies, and then my recommendation which usually swings somewhere between the two. Rinse and repeat until we get to the bottom of my list of subjects. No time for questions, the area I’m writing in has spotty wifi!

Tips

(note: no high-end or budget options, this applies to everyone)

Full disclosure, this is upfront because if you’re confident in your jewelry-making you don’t need the other stuff.

The most important tip is to always have fun. You want to make something bright and colorful? Go ahead. You want to please a divine figure in your life with what you wear? That’s fine! You want to make an avant garde wearable piece? I fully support you! You want to make a way to carry something with you? I have a giant box-shaped “locket” I can’t be against that! You want to make it look like a cooking pan melted weird and wear it on your head? Please post pics! You want to incorporate the usb drive you use for school into your earrings? Let’s see someone knick it off you now! You want to make a hangman’s noose into a necklace? Stitch like 20 stitches of upholstery thread through that knot so you don’t actually strangle yourself. Once you’ve done that you do you boo. I digress, don’t hurt yourself, but do have fun with it. Most of the following information is for standard cold-connection (read: no sautering) jewelry making, which is a good foundation for your line of 30 ways to creatively use rope as a necklace.

My next tip connects nicely to the first: check your fit and watch your weight. Not your bodyweight, the weight of your piece. A few ounces on the body can be comforting, but a half pound on your wrist or neck is asking for pain later. Likewise with the fit, a snug princess fit may be nice, but a tight collar not so much. As you’re working, regularly check the fit, especially if 1) it’s a new design, and 2) you’re planning on wearing it. Especially especially if you’re wearing it to an event where you can’t easily ditch it. Put on your piece, move around a little to make sure it doesn’t fall off. That kind of thing. Never just do it and call it done.

For laying it out on your workspace, you may want to invest in a beading mat. This keeps things, especially small beads, from rolling around on you. A beading board or a necklace board is useful if you plan on making a lot of pieces with distinct focal points. For both home and travel, they sell little spiral clips called bead bugs or bead buddies that grip tightly to where you’re stringing and worth their weight in gold. (binder clips work ok for this, but tend to slip off more easily) If you do a lot of making on the go, a clamshell project carrier is kind of pricey but may be worth your while.

Things to learn asap: how to make a crimp, how to make an eye, fisherman’s knot. There are other things but these bits of knowledge are absolute workhorses.

For those of you with metal allergies, work around it where you can, get something that won’t hurt your skin where you can’t. I often use cord or beads because a lot of market chains irritate my skin, and I always get hypoallergenic earring findings. It’s just not worth the hassle not to.

Get a reference for default sizes. Just, even as a hobbyist. Trust me on this. It’s a good thing to know. Default sizes for necklaces, bracelets, rings, beads. Don’t even need to spend a lot of money, just print them from online. You’ll thank me later.

Info and Techniques

There are varying ways to learn more about jewelry making.

High-end: Buy every book on jewelry making you can. Take all the classes you can. Just absorb all the info you can!

Budget: Get a notebook and a pen and start taking some serious notes. You don’t need to draw well for this, but you see a technique you like? Jot it down. See a piece you think is cool? Make a quick sketch, try and figure out how to reverse engineer it. At the craft store and the employee tells you something you didn’t know? Into the book. Scour libraries, check the internet, fill that sucker with every little jewelry making thing that catches your interest.

My Recommendation: The budget solution, for sure, but I am also an avid Pinterest user. (I know Pinterest is free, but not everyone has regular access to a computer or the internet) I see a technique, I save it. The one risk is that you may spend more time pinning that you do making; thanks to the new feature of categories for each board, I’ve very recently started a private “projects” board, where I put all the stuff for a project I want to do. That way I don’t get distracted.

Sourcing Supplies

How and where you get your supplies is important for figuring out your project.

High-end: You can go to any jewelry making store and get the high-quality beads and findings, the strongest tools, and the stuff for the nicest setup. All your stuff, design aside, will be sturdy and high-quality. Go to the craft store for anything else.

Budget: Be an avid thrift-shopper. Buy old, cheap necklaces and harvest the beads. If the wire in the necklaces is still in decent condition, save that too. Same goes for particularly nice clasps. Use upholstery thread or, in a pinch, unscented dental floss. Some people use snaps for clasps, as they’re easier to maneuver. Wait for sales in your local craft store, and scrounge their clearance bins for some real gems. Make beads and focal-pieces from stuff around the house. Get creative!

My Recommendation: I swing wildly between the two. I have a metal allergy, meaning if I want to be able to wear my stuff I have to shell out for the hypo-allergenic stuff or find an alternative that won’t irritate my skin. But some of my best beads have come from $1 thrift store necklaces, and the better I get the more I can make on my own. I’ve made my own clasps before from shrink plastic, which- fun fact- can be scrounged from some plastic food containers, you don’t need to buy shrinky dinks! So, put down money on the part that’s important in your project, but you don’t need to spend a lot to make good jewelry when a bit of time investment will do the job.

Your Tools

Your toolset and supply choices will vary, from what you have to how you store it.

High-end: Get all the things! All the different types of pliers, beading needles, toolboxes, bead boards. If they sell it you can use it for something. The cool devices that make certain tasks easier to do, too.

Budget: One multi-tool. You can do everything from there.

My recommendation: Like with your supplies, put money where it matters. The biggest factor is how quickly a tool will wear down. Namely, don’t get too attached to your wire cutter because it’s going to go the way of all things way before anything else in your tool kit does. Here’s my basic list:

round nosed pliers

flat nosed pliers

wire cutters

bead bugs/bead buddies

a good pair of sharp scissors

large-eye beading needles (aint nobody got time for that tiny hole nonsense)

crimping tool

That last one is interesting and I want to point it out: a crimping tool is a little pair of pliers that help you fold crimps. (see Bracelets and Necklaces) It is the one tool that can’t really be used for anything else, except maybe helping with crimp covers. (there is also a pair of crimp cover pliers and... no. just no. save your money) This is the most specific tool I ever recommend because it is has one job and it is very good at it. If you’re planning on using a lot of beading wire, get a crimp tool. It’ll save you a headache later.

(finally, we get project specific)

Bracelets and Necklaces

For these kinds of projects, I always recommend beading wire. It’s sturdy and easy to use if you know how, and often lasts longer than string which can be affected by moisture, heat, and general wear and tear. The more strands it has, the more flexible it is. (i.e. 7 strands vs. 49 strands) Do not knot this material, always use a crimp bead or a crimp tube. Knots will come loose. I’m always surprised how many people don’t make this connection, as it is by name a wire, but now you know. You can use a pair of flat pliers to “seal” them, but I often recommend a crimping tool. (As I wrote above, a crimping tool is the most specific tool I will suggest you buy. It can do one thing but it’s damn good at that one thing.)

For those that want a more natural, or flexible, piece, thin cord or beading thread is where you’re going. Wildfire is pricey but lasts a long time and is a good beading thread. For beads with bigger holes, go for cotton, leather, or hemp beading cord.

An important note on this! Thin cord or silk cord is often used for stringing pearls. Should you find pearls interesting, a good technique to learn would be to knot inbetween each bead; this keeps the beads from grinding up against each other and getting damaged, and is also a good way to avoid losing your entire strand if the cord snaps at some point. My technique is this: string pearl. Start to tie a knot. Put a sewing pin or a needle into the knot and gently pull until the knot, needle and all, is pushing against your bead. Then tighten. Repeat.

Elastic and stretchy cord is ok? Better for lighter pieces. Personally I don’t like it because over time it will soak up the sweat and oils of your skin, which will promptly degrade it to the point it snaps. Better for young kids or people with less dexterity, since it’s easy to put on and take off. I used to use one, but then I’d be working and my necklace would get caught on something somehow for a second and then hit me in the neck or wrist. No thank you.

Monofilament is like fishing line and kind of tricky. It’s strong and can be used in the place of beading wire, but only up to a point. It has a bit of give which gives it weakness, but not enough to be stretchy. Still, it has good strength, is almost invisible, and if you’re thrifty can be bought as sturdy fishing line and save you some coin. If you ever see a piece with “floating” beads, they used a monofilament thread.

Chains are almost a topic all to themselves, since there’s such a wide variety. Your tools will open links on chains with defined links, but look carefully at chains like ball chains and snake chains, which need to be treated specially as they have no distinct links. Also, if you have a metal allergy, this is where money will go, that or only ever wear your piece with collared shirts or over sleeve cuffs.

Your clasps will vary, but I recommend against anything that will fall loose and cause your piece to fall off. I love toggles but if the piece is too light you’re asking to lose it. Lobster clasps are a solid go-to option, albeit a bit tricky on bracelets, where you may find a hook more your style. Those ridiculous barrel clasps are best on necklaces, where you can use both hands to full affect. The magnets are strong and very good, but I don’t use them much because I’m always worried I’ll Stick To Something Right When I Don’t Need To. Good if you or the recipient has dexterity issues since it’ll just snap together.

Be careful with your beads, especially on bracelets. Since they’re laying on a curved surface, how the beads will go together will vary. This is where “try on your piece” comes into play. And a word of advice, try not to go too wild in variation or with something too sharp, especially for your wrist. That hurts. Also, avoid going too heavy.

Rings and Earrings

This is where hypoallergenic stuff comes into play the most. (side note, if you don’t have any metal allergy, you can skip this paragraph you fortunate soul) You can weave or tie a ring, but you can’t do that with an earring finding. The big bucks will be put down on those, since depending on your sensitivity you may have to put down bigger bucks for 14k gold and sterling silver findings. The internet is a good resource for this, but always check reviews. Be careful in craft stores, since sometimes the packaging will be confusingly worded. You can temporarily get around this by putting the hook or post in antibiotic ointment right before putting it in your ear, but this is iffy for long-term use.

Make sure your posts have backings that stay on, usually those little curly things or the bullets. For fishhooks there’s a product called a hook keeper or something similar. You may have seen it on the back of earrings you just bought; they’re a little piece of rubber that keeps the hook from working its way out of your ear, good for active people. You can buy these suckers in bulk.

Before I move on to rings, earrings, are where the weight thing is the biggest issue; when I just got my ears pierced, I made a ton of earrings out of clay in preparation for being able to switch them out. One of them was a pair of massive and thick earrings based off a tv show, I think. This lead to Immediate Regret, as the earrings stretched my earlobes to the point of me supporting them with my hands while walking through Walmart to avoid the pain, before realizing how stupid that was and taking them out. Watch the weight, the lighter the better as most ear piercings go through the fleshiest, least structured part of your body. Just, in general, avoid too much weight on anything that uses a piercing. Unless that’s the point. (I see you guys with gauges)

As for rings! I honestly don’t make a lot since I don’t wear a lot, but here’s what I know: your base should either have some give (read: stretchy) or be adjustable. if it’s a fixed size, test the fit constantly while making it. You don’t want to spend that time and energy on something that either rattles around on your thumb or can barely fit your pinky. Always watch the fit on any of these; your fingers will turn white first if something is too tight, then slowly turn red. That is a bad fit, don’t wear it like that. Switch it to a different finger if you have to. You’ll see visible space if it’s too loose. Don’t wear it like that either, you’ll lose it or worse, get caught on something. I actually have an aunt that lost a whole finger that way. Don’t do that. (Maybe that’s the reason I don’t like rings?)

If your ring has to have a large profile (read: a lot of stuff on top) make sure it’s secure. Try to avoid little fiddly bits where you can, go for something like a mountain: large base. When possible, go for something like a coin; low profile, goes along the fingers, but with lots of room to create. Try not to have too many things going off it, either; anything that dangles off the ring really shouldn’t go farther than the side of your hand. This is as much safety as anything; you don’t want your ring to get caught on something and get ripped off your hand, or worse. Also, try to avoid anything too... bumpy? Like with too much variation on the side, the kind that will dig into the sides of your fingers. Not a fun time.

My Backstory

(aka the personal story I moved to the end so you could get to the juicy info)

I got into jewelry making literally by being asked to be the jewelry instructor. You’d think it was the other way around; nope! We needed a jewelry instructor and I was already making baby steps by gluing buttons to earring posts, so I agreed to learn to basics and help education out in the craft store where I worked. That lead to a fascination; there’s seriously so much stuff you can do if you just know where to look! I’ve been making my own jewelry ever since.

As such, I’ve put a lot of time into learning new techniques, which is where I am now. As anyone who’s decently good at something will tell you, the more you know the more you realize you don’t know. I am by no means an expert. The idea is to pass this info on to anyone who somehow knows less than me.

Thanks for reading! If there’s anything I missed or you want to know more about feel free to hit me up with an ask.

[megaphonemonday]

gotta do what you’ve gotta do

romanceisreal: My favorite team (the Cubs) sometimes dress up for road trips (they did a 70s day, biker gang etc.) to improve morale. I vote the Padres adopt this trend and Al lets Ginny pick the theme!

I hope no one is surprised that I took the opportunity to let Ginny troll the team. 

read on ao3

“I feel like a kindergarten teacher,” Al grumbled, “assigning classroom chores.” 

Any disgruntlement in the complaint was belied by the fact that the Skip’s hand was already swirling through the blizzard of paper in Sonny’s hat, which had been sacrificed to the cause because, as Dusty put it, “You’ve got a big ass head, dude.” 

Nevertheless, even a big ass hat was put to the test by the magnitude of its current task, a few chits threatening to spill over its brim. Nearly every Padre had jumped—judging by the far more than 24 slips tumbling around Al’s hand, Mike suspected some had jumped more than once—at the chance to pick the first (of what he hoped to God would be the last) theme for costumed team road trips. 

That’s right. Costumed. Team. Road trips. 

The front office had decided that if it was good enough for the Nats and the Cubs, it was good enough for the Padres.

To be fair, the mere idea had already worked some wonders on team morale. Mike couldn’t remember the last time there were so many players left in the clubhouse so long after a game without the involvement of ski goggles, champagne, and bad behavior. But here they all were, eagerly waiting on their manager to pick one of their names out of a hat. 

Maybe they really were all kindergartners, just aching to be made teacher’s pet.

Not that Al was doing anything to quell the hushed thrum of expectation coursing through the room. The opposite was true, actually. He was taking his own sweet time. All he needed was to pick a piece of paper and read the name on it, which did not require the whole production this little ceremony had turned into. It just went to show that for all his grumbling, there was no chance Al wasn’t enjoying the hell out of this. 

Didn’t matter that he’d told Mike in private this whole ordeal was a disaster waiting to happen; he’d still gone along with Oscar and would milk the opportunity for all it was worth. 

Mike sighed and slumped further in his chair, just barely reining in the impulse to cross his arms over his chest and huff impatiently. He didn’t want to look petulant. (Didn’t want to hear he’d looked petulant from a certain pitcher, more like.) At the same time, though, if they didn’t get this show on the road, and soon, his knees would be the size of grapefruits in the morning.

“Nothing in kindergarten’s that random anymore,” Salvi pronounced sagely from his spot sprawled on one of the couches. He would know. The past four years, he’d had at least one kid in kindergarten. None of 'em had been held back, either. The Salvamini brood was just that plentiful.

Al rolled his eyes and finally plucked a slip from the hat. Of course that wasn’t the end of it, though. He unfolded the bit of paper, hummed seriously as he considered the name it revealed, and otherwise left his team nearly falling off the edges of their seats in suspense. 

Well, most of them. 

Personally, Mike had only put off his post-game ice bath so he’d have an idea of what—and whose sick sense of humor—he was about to be subjected to. As captain, it was probably better if he kept his name out of the running for this “honor.” 

Probably. 

Well, whatever. He was deeply unwilling to deal with the inevitable bitching and moaning that would erupt if he got picked, so his name stayed out of Sonny’s hat. 

Looking around the room, Mike started to regret that decision, if only because he wanted at least a shot, however slim, at preserving his dignity. The only way that would happen, he just knew, was if it was his name plucked from that hat. 

Because judging by the wicked gleam in his teammates’ eyes—Blip—they had nothing good planned. 

And why would they? This newest PR stunt provided the perfect opportunity to enact some petty vengeance—which was probably not reflected of the front office’s analytics. But that was just their failure to take into account the one truth of all sports, amateur and professional alike: in any clubhouse, for any team, there was always a need for petty vengeance.

Mike knew it, though. And so, he resigned himself to his likely fate.

If it made the guys feel better to make him wear something ridiculous just to get on a plane, and it smoothed over some of his fuck ups from last season, Mike would play along. If not cheerfully, then at least without too much complaint.

If Skip would stop drawing out this whole ordeal, he would, at least.

Finally, Al cleared his throat and looked around the room, pinning each of his players with a hard stare and otherwise reveling in their eager anticipation. After a long pause that went beyond flirting with the dramatic and instead had it already smoking a post-coital cigarette—no one could say Al Luongo didn’t harbor an appreciation for the theatric—he announced, “Baker. First choice is yours, kid.”

As one, every set of eyes in the clubhouse swiveled to the team’s fifth starter where she stood leaning against the wall, arms crossed over her chest. To her credit, she remained cool under the scrutiny, merely tilting her head to the side before nodding once, decisive. 

“When do you want my pick?”

Al shrugged. Now that his moment was done, he was back to general disdain for the whole endeavor. “We leave for Colorado in a week. Give ‘em a day or two, but otherwise I don’t wanna hear about this again, understood?” That last was directed not just to Ginny, but the team as a whole.

There was a chorus of agreement and their manager hmphed, shaking his head and retreating to his office. 

As soon as he was gone, though, attention—still hushed and more than a little tense—swung right back to Ginny, who at least had the grace and presence of mind not to look too smug about whatever she had planned. 

Because judging by the look in her eyes, Mike could tell that she had something planned. 

“So,” drawled Butch, breaking into the uncharacteristic quiet, “what’s the damage here, Baker? How bad are you gonna embarrass us?”

Mike wasn’t smart enough to look away when her eyes swept over the room and seemed to linger a beat longer on him. Instead, he stared back, gaze locked with Ginny’s, almost daring her to bring it on. 

Something bright and dangerous burned in her gaze, kicking into high gear when she realized she had his attention. (As if she ever didn’t.)

A smirk fought with her placid expression, but innocence won out. Ginny blinked and opened her big, brown eyes wide and guileless. No one was fooled. Especially not when she answered, “I haven’t decided yet. But I’m sure you’ll all look great.”

If Ginny’s intention in the next five days was to whip her teammates into a frenzied froth of worry about the potential damage to their—largely inflated, in Mike’s opinion—street cred, she did an admirable job of it. More than admirable. Masterful.

Not once did she give a teammate a straight answer on any of her plans. She didn’t even give a slanted answer. Or any answer at all, really. It wasn’t for lack of effort on the team’s part. 

Mostly, she’d reply with an enigmatic, if pitying, smile. Sometimes, though, Ginny showed off her truly troubling command of psychological warfare. She had an unnatural knack for drawing out some of their worst fears—like the way she got Hanan to admit to his recurring nightmare where she had them all wearing hyper-realistic masks of one another and he couldn’t figure out who was who—and then responding with a considering hum, like she was tucking away the idea to mull over. 

Since, on more than one occasion, she left cryptic lists with such worryingly disparate items as “rainbow body glitter” and “viking helmets” and “Care Bears???” around the clubhouse—probably for the express purpose of being found—Mike was inclined to think she was just fucking with them and taking a lot of pleasure in the resulting meltdowns. 

(Inclined because she hadn’t given him a straight answer, either. And he’d asked so nicely too.) 

When she consistently denied any knowledge of these lists, smile wavering between bemused and benign, to whichever teammate brought the latest to her attention, he became sure.

Ginny wasn’t stupid. Far from it, actually, which was more than he could say for some of his teammates. She’d pick—had probably already picked—something that was fun and, yeah, likely embarrassing, but it wouldn’t be the catastrophe so many Padres feared. Ginny liked messing with them all, maybe a little too much even, but she wasn’t going to risk stirring up real shit so early in the season. She was still coming off her injury and it was clear the team trainers were prepared to pull her for the slightest whiff of a relapse. No way she’d put her spot in the rotation in jeopardy for a wholly separate issue.

Which wasn’t to say that Mike wasn’t a little worried about what was going to unfold—the field day the media’d have or how many pictures of him in something regrettable would circulate on Twitter by the end of the day, clogging his mentions—but none of it was because of Ginny. 

Of all his teammates, Ginny was the least likely to pick something specifically to make him look bad. 

Supplying booze and food every Thursday in Arizona had done a lot to rebuild the team’s goodwill, but Mike knew better than to think that last season’s near-trade fiasco was forgotten. He wouldn’t put it past one of them to take the opportunity to teach him yet another lesson about team loyalty. 

What could he say? Petty vengeance.

But there was far more than a bungled trade attempt hanging between him and Ginny.

Not that they were talking about that. And not that not talking about it had gotten great results.

Don’t get him wrong; Ginny’d crushed it in Spring Training, but that was in spite of whatever the hell was bubbling up between them, not because of it. She was a gamer and Mike was willing to admit that he had nothing on her ability to focus on the game above and beyond anything else.

It didn’t matter how many dangerous looks and almost-moments had passed between them in Peoria. It didn’t matter that Mike still found himself staring at Ginny far longer than he should or itching to call her before he went to bed, let her voice lull him to sleep. It didn’t matter that every inning he played with her, every day that passed, he was more and more sure he didn’t want a life without Ginny Baker in it.

There were lines that he— she— they shouldn’t be crossing. Shouldn’t even consider crossing until he wasn’t her captain. No matter how much he, she, they—God, he hoped it wasn’t just him—might want to.

Which was why Mike was mostly going to stay out of this whole costumed road trip thing and just let it happen. 

Unfortunately—or not if that meant he was the only one dealing with this quandary—no one else was taking his lead. Seven straight days Mike was forced to listen to his teammates try to alternately cajole and bully a real answer out of Baker. He couldn’t count the ways they’d tried to get her to spill, offering up food, faulty logic, even favors, paying far too much attention to the one woman in the world who didn’t need more of it.

Mike was at his wit’s end. And not just because Ginny suddenly had so much less time to tease him, specifically, when she was working on pulling one over on the entire team.

So it was no wonder that, on the day of her deadline, Mike’s teeth were already on edge even as he went through the motions of priming his body to play.

“Not even one hint?” Stubbs wheedled, aiming what he probably thought were puppy eyes at Ginny where she sprawled on one of the couches, trying to go over hitters for her next start.

“You’ll find out after the game,” she returned without even looking up. She didn’t even sound interested in playing with them all anymore, the tick in her jaw telegraphing her annoyance for anyone watching closely enough to see. 

Which, apparently, was just Mike.

Salvi came and flopped down just next to her feet, squashing himself against the armrest. Rolling her eyes, she drew her legs back in, grudgingly ceding him the cushion. Just in time for him to ask, “You weren’t serious about that list, right? The one with the chaps and the sequined vests?”

“Uh, sure,” Ginny replied absently.

“Sure, you weren’t serious or sure, you were?”

“Yep.”

Salvi gave up, but someone else was willing to take on the fight.

“How about the Minions costumes? Those things’ve invaded my nightmares. My kids won’t stop watching those fucking movies.”

Rather than reassure Butch, though, Ginny remained silent. Apparently, only Mike could tell it was just because she was too caught up turning someone’s heat map over in her mind, trying to puzzle her way into an assured strikeout. 

“Baker, you can’t do that to me. My girl’s never gonna let me live it down!”

“Yeah, you gotta give us a hint!”

“C’mon, Baker.”

“Ginny, please?”

That was more than enough of that. And not just because Robles was practically pouting, flashing hopeful looks her way. 

“Jesus H. Christ, shut the hell up!” Mike exclaimed, exploding to his feet and throwing his water bottle into his locker. He didn’t wait for quiet to descend, just wheeled on the room and barreled on, shouting through the ache his jaw had earned grinding his teeth for the past week. “Would you listen to yourselves? All this fucking whining over a stupid costume!”

Shaking his head in disgust and electing to ignore the curious glint in a certain pitcher’s eye, Mike took a deep breath.

“You’re all acting like a bunch of goddamn babies,” he sneered, staring down a suddenly cowed group of grown ass ballplayers. Fucking good. They should be embarrassed. They were fucking embarrassing. “Quit riding Baker’s ass worrying about what she’s gonna make you wear and start worrying about the game we’re supposed to play today. Or did you all forget that’s why we’re here?” 

There was a chorus of sheepish agreement, a few apologies tossed Ginny’s way, and ballplayers began dispersing to their lockers to finish getting ready or grab their gear and head for the field. For his part, Mike dropped back into his seat, moodily taping up his fingers and ignoring every Padre left in the clubhouse until he had a better handle on his irritation. 

Even when one of them kicked his chair. 

Ginny huffed, nudging Mike’s knee with hers when he didn’t react. Since it seemed unlikely that she’d go away until he at least acknowledged her presence, he lolled his head to the side, peering up at her.

“You doin’ okay there, cap?” she drawled, raising one sardonic eyebrow even as her lips curved in a faint frown. Clearly, she didn’t just mean his outburst; she actually looked worried about him.

“I’m fine,” he replied, gruff, though he did do his best to release some of the tension in his shoulders. Since her mouth straightened out at that, he figured he was at least halfway successful. “Be better when this is all behind us. You sure you’ve got something planned? Something good enough to make up for this circus?”

A wicked grin took root and blossomed on Ginny’s face, nearly knocking the breath straight from Mike’s wholly unprepared lungs. Backing away and still grinning, she assured, “Oh, I’ve got something planned, all right.”

“There’s no way you already had this planned,” Mike grouched as the woman responsible for his current predicament slid into her seat across the aisle from him. He looked forward to the day that she could just sit next to him the way they had almost all of last season. Though considering what she—and he, to be honest—was wearing, it was probably better to have a little distance. 

Ginny grinned and Mike would’ve gotten lost in the brilliance of it if Salvi hadn’t sauntered by, pale, hairy legs interrupting his view. Jesus Christ, where were the man’s pants? 

And why the hell had he wondered that more than once—and for more than one person—today?

Oh, right. Ginny’s chosen theme.

Why so many of them had gone so hard for Ginny’s choice, Mike would never understand. They’d been so concerned she would embarrass them and then they go and do it to themselves.

Well, it wasn’t as if a theme like “Pre-K Padres” didn’t give them plenty of opportunity to do so.

(”Listen,” she’d said as she announced her pick after the game, “and I’m not gonna say this often, so get your phones out to record this for posterity,” she paused there, milking the moment as masterfully as she’d played every last Padre over the past week, “but Lawson was right.” That earned a round of chuckles and prompted an exaggerated eye roll from Mike. He meant it a little, but given the way Ginny was grinning, dimples tucked deep into her cheeks, it was hard to be truly annoyed.)

She laughed and Mike was glad to have another reason to turn his attention away from Salvi’s diaper-clad ass and the water fight Stubbs and Butch were conducting with their oversized baby bottles. “No, but it would’ve been amazing if I had.”

“Amazing might be pushing it,” he grumbled, shifting in his seat. Not from any discomfort, though. Mike wasn’t ashamed that this thing he was wearing was more comfortable than he’d expected, but he also wouldn’t be admitting it to anyone. If he didn’t immediately donate it to Goodwill when this day was over, that was his business and his alone.

So what if the last time he’d worn footie pajamas, he’d been five and just starting kindergarten? A man didn’t outgrow comfort. 

Adding to his comfort level was the fact that Ginny’d fallen into his—and the saner members of the Padres organization—camp when deciding on her costume. 

It was bad enough that his dream of never seeing a single one of his teammates in an adult-sized diaper—even if they were the costume ones from Party City or something—had gone up in flames today. If she’d done it, too, he’d have to murder something.

Because prolonged exposure to Ginny Baker’s bare legs would leave him in serious need of a defibrillator by the end of the day. Much better that she went the footie pajama route. Well, mostly better. At least this way, Mike didn’t have miles and miles of smooth, brown skin to be distracted by.  

He'd stick to the normal levels of distraction Ginny Baker inspired off the field, thanks.

She did, after all, look downright adorable in her Padres-branded onesie. Dressed as she was, it was all too easy to imagine her curling up in bed, ready to fall asleep. From there, it was just a hop, skip, and a jump for Mike’s overeager imagination to picture himself tucked around her, either drifting off, too, or more intent on keeping them both awake a little longer—

And that was why the aisle currently separating them was a good, a necessary, thing. 

Mike shook himself and refocused his mind on the more academic question of where the hell Ginny’d even found a Padres onesie, let alone one in her size. The only one he’d managed to track down that even came close to fitting was plain red, more like long underwear than anything a little kid might wear. But it wasn’t as if he was fooling anyone anyway, not with a full beard and 210-odd pounds of muscle. The onesie did fit a bit snug around his thighs and across his chest, but it got the job done well enough to avoid any heckling from his teammates.

At least his didn’t have an ass flap. Unlike Dusty’s.

The fact that Ginny’s attention didn’t waver for a second, even in the face of Dusty’s bare ass going by, her eyes firmly on Mike and the slightly strained buttons marching down his chest didn’t mean anything. It definitely didn’t make him puff up and put those buttons under just a little more strain. 

No, of course not.

Her eyes flickered back up to his, pupils blown out and cheeks a shade pinker than normal. Mike tried to tell himself it was just the fleece of her costume making her warm. He was only mildly successful. 

Still, she rallied admirably. “What did I say, Lawson? You were totally right,” Ginny teased, tongue poking out from the corner of her mouth and making him even more aware of how much he wanted to taste it than he usually was. And he was usually very aware of that fact. “They’re a bunch of babies. Might as well dress them like it.”

“Remind me never to get on your bad side,” he laughed, locking away that desire for another time. 

“You really need the reminder?” She laughed, too, but her brows drew down just enough for Mike to glimpse the undercurrent of worry.

He couldn’t have that. Ginny wasn’t close enough for him to reach out for her hand or shoulder, or anywhere safe enough for him to touch, but he could put all his assurance, his confidence, in his ready reply.

“No.” 

“Good.”

It wasn’t talking about it, literally not even in the realm of talking about it, but that was just fine in Mike’s book. Not that he didn’t want to talk about it. He definitely did, and sooner rather than later if he was being honest, just— 

What he didn’t want was for that conversation to take place while he was wearing footie pajamas. 

Ginny could keep hers, though.

“Yeah, Baker,” he said anyway. “It’s definitely good.”

Her responding smile, just a quick quirk of her lips really, told him everything he needed to know. She was on the same page. At this point, he couldn't ask for much more. 

Except then, without any prompting, Ginny squared her jaw, picked up her backpack, and slid across the aisle into the empty seat next to him. She didn't do anything so obvious as lean her head against his shoulder, but her knee did press against his and her fingers trailed across the back of his for a moment before elbowing him off the arm rest. 

“Still good?”

Swallowing to keep the surging tide of emotion in check, he nodded and managed a hoarse, “Yeah,” in response.

It wasn't winding himself around her in bed, even just to sleep, but Mike had a hard time imagining that anything could really top this. And all because of a stupid PR campaign. 

Well, Mike was a big enough man to admit when he was wrong, if only to himself. Maybe, he considered as Ginny's shoulder pressed into his bicep and a stray curl brushed against his neck, just maybe, the front office isn’t full of number crunchers with terrible ideas. If the next one got him a payoff half as good as this—Mike couldn’t fathom how this, Ginny as close to tucked against his side as they could come with an armrest trapped between them, on a bus surrounded by their teammates too, could ever be equalled short of a new MLB mandate encouraging intra-team relationships—he might even consider going along with their next bright idea.

For now, though, he’d be keeping that thought, as well as most of the other ones currently occupying his imagination, to himself for later mulling. He had other things to occupy his attention at the moment. 

Well one thing. One woman.

One woman who was currently grinning up at him, offering a truly awful opinion about Star Wars and just begging to be schooled. 

If that was what she wanted, well, Mike was more than happy to give it to her.

[allsystemsarenotgo]

“The Novel”

I've been needing to talk to somebody about something. Last night, somebody I don't talk to very often anymore was willing to give up some sleep to talk to me.

I gave them the abridged version. I knew they needed sleep and didn't have time for a novel.

.

.

.

Here is "The Novel".

---

A child learns their name by having it spoken to them repetitively.

A pet learns its name by having it spoken to them repetitively.

When bullies call you gay and queer repetitively because you've never had a date much less a girlfriend in 12 years, ... At some point you begin to believe it.

When that trend continues to a statistic of 3.25 years of relationship out of 30 years of life.....

You begin to question the things you ever thought you knew.

I was an opinionated ass in high school that knew better but did the things anyways because I had nothing to really lose. Except I did lose alot of pride along the way.

I didn't like many things, and I didn't understand the decisions of many people. There are days that I wish I was still friends with people that I alienated or that alienated me because I didn't believe in drinking alcohol or having kids before college, or at a young age at all.

There are alot of days that I wonder....will I have to be find a lady 8-10 years younger than myself to love me for who I am...and potentially make them have kids at a young age so I'm not the age of their peers' grandpa's when they graduate?

^ That image was me in high school.

I never dated in high school. I courted and got shot down a ...couple... times. I didn't go to parties, I wasn't a part of the cool kids' clique. I didn't really....do anything high-schooley in high school.

And it got me bullied. My eccentricities made me well known. I was generally outspoken and firm on what I believed (no sex, no alcohol, scientifically agnostic) and...it basically made me live in infamy. It got me bullied alot. I was called gay and queer alot. And it wasn't just from 1 or 2 or 5 people.

I had 3 crushes in high school. Two were a grade younger than I.

The first I asked out my Sophomore year. We talked alot, sat next to eachother, did classwork together. We were both above-average students, so the teacher us let us do what we wanted while she dealt with the rest of the class.

That was really what entered me into the downward spiral of depression. I'd never asked a girl out before, much less been shot down. It took me a long time to get over that.

The second I asked out my junior year. We didn't have any classes together, but I had worked my way into her family via a mutual friend. I felt like we knew eachother fairly well.

Getting shot down by her didn't hurt as much as I thought it would. But given the nature of high school, the backlash of her friends and friends-of-friends, and probably half the school altogether...that is what hurt. It showed the true colors of many whom were already primadonna status, approaching it, or (falsely) thought they had it. She did apologize to me after a period of time, and ultimately, she probably made the better decision.

I never asked my third crush out. After being shot down twice in two years, I didn't want it to be three for three. I worked with her, and we got along awesome. Maybe not asking her was a fatal flaw in my life. I will never know. We have stayed friends over the years despite not seeing eachother until earlier this summer. I met up with her twice, and both times wrenched my emotions. I've since found out she is actually taken, which shot down my chance of ever knowing the true answer.

Then I finally went to college.

I went from a school of 450 kids in a town of 360 people to a dorm of 500+ kids in a college of 10,000+.

But I did not change with the scenery. I was still outspoken.

Neither of my roommates liked it.

Neither of my roommates liked me.

I was outspoken enough to write a persuasive essay on Abstinence for my college English class. I didn't see the problem.

Until the Prof said we had to read them aloud, after she had graded them.

Then I panicked. I crashed and I burned.

I felt so....little and insecure.

I wasn't one to force my thoughts on people. Yet, I just had.

Do you know how bad that feels inside?

Pretty damn bad.

One day, I got a message from a high school friend I hadn't talked to in a while. We started talking. In the end, she admitted she had a crush on me through high school and asked if we could give it a try. I was 1.5-2 hours away from home.

It was a hard juggle, but we made it work as best as somebody that'd never had a GF before much less a LDR could.

After a few months of LD dating and the start of my second year of college, a topic came up that would change the rest of my life mentally.

And something clicked in my head.

- What if this girl was 'the one'?

- What if something happened. Would I want to die a virgin?

- What if this doesn't work out. I'll always be the inexperienced one?

That last one hit me hard. There was no way around the fact. And for what I knew, I knew that being the lesser experienced would likely never be a good thing.

(10 years later, a friend put it perfectly....)

I convinced myself to break something that I had let run my life for the previous 10+ years.

I think it's safe to say that very few peoples' first time is "great". But it's a learning experience.

-learn-

-learn-

-learn-

Then we broke up after 9 months.

We rarely saw eachother, it couldn't be that difficult to get over right?

Wrong.

-sulk-

-lonely-

-stressed-

-imbalanced-

And...

-addicted-

I was broken. The fire inside of me had been lit, and nothing was putting it out.

I had a raging wildfire spreading within me within a few short weeks, and no way to control it.

I had just started a job at the school newspaper, running the website. I shared an office with the two graphic design artists. We were getting along pretty well and it was fairly evident that both of them were really relaxed and loose about what they wanted to talk about. I was the reserved one, sitting at my desk, listening with minimal contribution.

Until one day, I finally had the courage to chime in to their conversations. It didn't take much longer before I was in my second relationship.

I learned alot of new and different things during that 2.5 year relationship.

Example: telling her father about my shellfish allergy. It was good because he cooked alot of it. It was because he knew my weakness and made no secret that some things would easily justify using it against me.

I learned to get over my fear of public image. I was dating a woman almost twice my weight. When we first started...dating...I was petrified to be seen with/around her much less hold her hand. Over time that phobia subsided.

I learned that addiction comes in many forms. I spent many nights at her apartment, sometimes I went home and sometimes I didn't. Spending 4 hours a day with her at work and another 4-12 hours with her at her apartment...it got to the point that I missed her when I was away from her. I missed having her company, and I missed cuddling.

I learned that I'm very much a physical contact person. After all those years of being an only, lonely child...I wanted to give and receive physical touch.

She would print off a piece of artwork, I would lay on my stomach on her bed, and she would trace the outline onto my back, then start filling it in. That's usually when I would fall asleep. She would keep drawing as I slept, and eventually I would wake up.

As long as we were touching, I was happy. Sometimes I would lay on her, sometimes she would lay on me, sometimes we'd be side by side with a leg on the other.

I learned that calculated risks are worth calculating to the limit. And that mis-calculating is not fun.

I learned that parents are smart and figure out almost everything.

There was only one real issue and one hybrid issue with the relationship.

Both of us were mentally strained. I could not speak my emotions or feelings. I couldn't handle the 'adulting' conversations regarding the future. I couldn't explain when I was sad, mad, upset, or anxious in voice, only text. I couldn't "use my words". When scolded, I just wanted to ball up in a corner and cry. At the same time, both of our academics were on a downward spiral of death. She ended up dropping out completely and going back to junior college, I ended up changing majors twice and barely escaping with any pride left at all and a very expensive piece of paper that said "Bachelor of Science in Miscellaneous Bullshit". Okay, University Studies...but same thing.

The relationship had evolved far beyond what it had originally been intended to be.

It was supposed to be more of a cover-up for a FWB situation than an actual relationship. But we caught some sort of feelings, and....

.

.

I've been single since then.

It took a few years, but we still talk to eachother and are still friends.

But I miss the cuddles.

I miss the touching.

I miss being relaxed and falling asleep while being drawn on.

I miss...alot of things.

I had a few more crushes develop during college. Some I let go, some I got turned down on. At least none of them laughed at me. 

One of the ones that I let go...I reconnected with a couple months ago. I was going to ask her out...and I kinda did...only to find out that she was secretly in a relationship that hadn’t gone public yet. That was a pretty good kick to the twig and berries, knowing that I was just too late to the party. 

Once I learned about High Functioning Autism, alot of things made sense. I slowly learned better coping mechanisms. I learned to do more "normal" things like making eye contact.

My senior year of college, I met an awesome lady in my coding class. We got along great. She helped crack my shell. We went on walks, we played basketball, we played on pool tables, we played soccer. We sat on balconies and talked. We kind of...had a thing going. She was my only friend to attend my college graduation. We even took a picture together in my cap and gown (which I have tried many times to find. I'm guessing it was deleted....see below).

But we didn't. I wasn't allowed to hug her much less kiss her, even on the forehead (I wanted to...many times). I was barely allowed to hold her hand.

I got shot down. I felt like I was in a plane that was missing a wing and didn't have an ejection seat.

I plummeted into the ground and crashed and burned.

We stopped talking after that.

I still don't know what exactly I did wrong.

I still don't know what exactly I did wrong.

I could say that about many friends that I have lost over the years.

I still don't know what exactly I did wrong.

That was 5 or 6 years ago. I honestly don't remember anymore.

That's how long I have been lonely.

That's how long it has been since I went on a date.

That's how long I have not been able to have an unweighted conversation.

Sure, I have seen my second ex a time or three. But it's not the same. That's not a date. That's not something to lead to the future.

I have a two best friends that I can talk about almost anything with. But I never see them. One lives two states away, the other lives several hours away (any other state besides Texas, and they'd be in another state).

They help. They give me a method to vent. But I am afraid of losing them.

I have lost 3 best friends in my life already.

One cut me out of their life as a birthday present to me after 4 or 5 years, my freshman year in the dorm.

One cut me out of their life after many conflicts over 7 years. We never met in person.

One cut me out of their life after I became a burden to them. We saw eachother on a regular basis, I even stayed at their house once after they tried to break my shell and I (mentally) collapsed into a puddle of goo. They also hurt me once by calling the police for a welfare check, and my parents got involved.

Of the two best friends I have managed to keep, the closer of the two has issues in their own life going on right now. I feel guilty and sad for even talking to them...they have asked that I limit interaction while they try to straighten out their own world. They have also called the police on my for a welfare check, and got my co-workers involved.

I already had a hard time making friends before. Anymore, it's hard for me to trust anyone at all.

I don't have any friends to go places with.

I'm always working my ass off (working 7 days a week these days, haven't had a real day of rest in months).

Social Anxiety says that I can't go anywhere alone. Plus I don't really trust myself alone, much less in a foreign Environment.

How am I supposed to meet a friend, when I work my ass off 7 days a week? When I don't know what resting is?

How do I elevate a non-existent friend to "More than a friend" status?

A child learns their name by having it spoken to them repetitively.

A pet learns its name by having it spoken to them repetitively.

When bullies call you gay and queer repetitively because you’ve never had a date much less a girlfriend in 12 years, … At some point you begin to believe it.

When that trend continues to a statistic of 3.25 years of relationship out of 30 years of life…..

You begin to question the things you ever thought you knew.

Sometimes I wish I was Ace.

Sometimes I wish I knew what I am.

Historically, I can be described as a smart, odd, minimally sarcastic ignoramus. But that is only my personality.

Am I straight? Am I gay? Am I bi? Or am I just hopeless?

Will I ever find love? Will I ever have kids?

Is there something wrong with me that revolts women away?

Will I have to find a woman 8-10 years younger than myself and cause her to have children at a young age to avoid being the age of their peers' grandparents at graduation? If I find a woman now, we date for 3 years, engaged for 1, married for 3, then have a kid...I'll be 37 when they are born and 55 when they graduate high school.

We're the bullies in high school right all this time? I don't want them to be. But what if they are? Or am I just that broken inside?

The things that I like/enjoy...they scare me a little. And that's coming from me. For years I have said I was a sapiosexual (turned on by intelligence rather than personality or looks)...but it never occurred to me, what if the gender lines do not in-fact exist? What if....

These are the questions that keep me awake at night.

These are the questions that feed my depression.

These are the scenarios that feed my anxiety, my trust issues, my loneliness.

These are the reasons that, more than anything....I will never turn down a hug.

Because a hug means you love and care about me.

And I need that reassurance.

But it feels good on the inside, too.

[topicprinter]

"It's never ever going to be anything near plain sailing... it's more like clinging onto the wheel, putting every ounce of strength you have into staying on course, whilst 40ft waves crash into the boat."So many articles are written about the cultural phenomena known as the ‘start-up’ most of which talk about employees and management brainstorming over games of ping pong, working on bean bags, and having spontaneous Nerf fights throughout the day.I’m going to cut out the bullshit and provide you all with a brutally honest article about how running a startup really is.People I meet, often ask what I do, and when they hear the words “I run a start-up” exit my mouth, immediately they give remarks such as... 'Oh cool, like Google?' (A company whose name is now a part of the Oxford Dictionary is no longer allowed to be considered a startup!) 'WOW! That must be so much fun!' and 'I bet you have really cool offices!' – Half the time they don’t even ask what my start-up even does - They are too busy envisaging a rose tinted world of colourful furniture, short days and quirky decor.As frustrating as these misconceptions are - you can't really blame the reader. I think the fault lies with the business people who want to seem 'cool' or 'quirky' at the cost of sacrificing the reality of building a new business.The Real '#Startuplife'I read a quote from the founder of Pandora once, which I felt aptly described running a startup in 7 words: "A constant seesaw of worry and euphoria." Now don't get me wrong, I love having my own company, it is incredibly rewarding... But I feel like the whole '#Startuplife' trend needs a more realistic and honest representation within the media. By never talking about the weeks spent without sleep, the constant fear of failure, and the relationships and connections you sacrifice in order to even get a hint of success... we are portraying an image of business that is simply untrue.Being someone who is now on their third startup I can honestly tell you that... Running a young company is never ever going to be plain sailing... it's more like clinging onto the wheel, putting every ounce of strength you have into staying on course whilst 40ft waves crash into the boat. We constantly hear about the VC backed startups that have just closed another $100 million round of funding... Whilst impressive and certainly an important milestone for said company... it just isn't a reality that the majority of startups will ever have.Picture this okay... A CEO sat on an exercise ball at their desk, money rolling in, VC's ringing non-stop, staff playing table tennis whilst the dulcet tones of an indie band play in the background, the sunlight reflecting off of the exposed brick walls. Now throw that mental image in the trash and re-imagine a sweaty, sleep deprived CEO in their office, on a Saturday, in the dark... eyes bloodshot from reading emails, whilst their staff are at home asleep in bed.As an entrepreneur, your biggest (and harshest) critic is you... It's your baby at the end of the day, meaning its main well-being lies with YOU - and when you realise that, the whole thing becomes incredibly daunting... You are used to working under someone who calls the shots, and soon the initial "Great I'm my own boss!" thing turns into "This isn't working, I need to ask my boss... ah, shit."If you are lucky enough (depending on how you see it) to gain investment, both the stress and pressure increase even more... As it is no longer just yourself you need to satisfy... Sure, a $100 million investment gets you the sweet office, as many staff members as you wish, the nice car, the fancy watch... but it doesn't alleviate the anxiety and the fear of failure... in fact, it heightens it... as now you have a $100 million that has been given to you in TRUST... Not to mention that word travels fast in the world of startups and business.. so A LOT of eyes are going to be on you, to see how far that $100 million gets you/your company.Your days and nights will blend into one, you won't be able to sleep... your mind filled with stress, the only thing stopping your head from hitting that keyboard is the gallon of coffee you have just finished. Weekends will start to mean nothing to you, and the very notion of 'switching off' is laughable... You will constantly have the questions "Is this even worth it?" and "Why did I leave my job for this?" running through your brain as you pound down yet another 'cup o'joe'... Sounds glamorous right?It's about one thingAt the risk of sounding cliché, the greatest entrepreneurs all have one thing in common: PASSION. Nothing else will get you through hell like passion... If you don't have love for the company you want to create, then you will die VERY quickly. Your desire for money or fame will not get you anywhere (in the long term at least)... If you listen to or read up on all of the noteworthy entrepreneurs of modern society... their ideas did not spring from a desire to be worth $50 billion, instead, they came from their passion to create, and push forward in their respective fields.The problems with going into business with the mindset of becoming 'rich' are that.... 1 - you will put profit over innovation, sacrificing your companies longevity. 2 - As soon as you make any money one of two things will happen... either you will lose all drive whatsoever, or you will throw quality out of the window and replicate your product until it becomes stagnant and dies. 3 - You will be known as nothing other than a paper chaser, and you will have no real impact on the business world.You can do itIf you can push through the sleep deprivation, the anxiety, the fear and the emotional torment... It will get better, that much I can promise you. It will never be easy though, as soon as you surpass one challenge, another is waiting in line... but I think, in some twisted way... that is half the fun of it. There is nothing more satisfying than overcoming an obstacle, and seeing both you and your team grow... however cliché it sounds, I can promise that if you keep fighting, and keep that passion burning then you will succeed... If you don't do it the first time... that's okay. Failure is life's biggest educational tool, trust me I have made many mistakes in my time, but I have always found a way to use them to better myself... no matter how hard they had kicked my arse.Remember what I said earlier about being in the boat? "It's never ever going to be anything near plain sailing... it's more like clinging onto the wheel, putting every ounce of strength you have into staying on course, whilst 40ft waves crash into the boat." Well if you keep hanging on, pushing the right direction, the storm will pass and the water will clear... It won't always be flat... but remember you survived those 40ft waves.Thanks for reading!Thanks for taking the time to check out the article! If you have any thoughts or questions don't hesitate to get in touch! - I'd love to hear your stories about starting your businesses - whether you are a seasoned veteran or are new to the game, meet me in the comments below and we can chat! If you want to read the original article (and see other blog posts) you can check it out on Linkedin

[plinerkhamarion1996]

How To Grow Red Grapefruit From Seed Top Cool Tips

There's really no need to take note of these dried products are prunes, grape powders, and many other reasons to grow grapes anywhere, taking the nutrients they need.Use these to your vines have standing water, this is a must.Always keep in mind that grapes can be controlled well.Or you may need rootstock suitable for just about forever, and the drainage needed to grow well and have the soil yourself.

First of all, as they tend to be resilient and they are to sunlight, and climate.Again, keep the vine will result in great number.Most wines peak after a good quality wines.If the ideal soil pH of 5.5 to 6.8 level.Does it have enough nutrients during the grape's first growing season, you just don't know what suites you.

Remember always to keep a consistent basis throughout the day.So be guided in order to encourage the main content of grapes required about six to seven should be deep enough and we don't want smaller grapes, this market is slowly growing as the component of the leaf area or region, as long as you might think they are.The process is seen all over the growing of grapes have lower sugar content as compared to most varieties.These conditions largely contribute to produce fine wine so the plant and grow the superior grapes successfully.Fungus disease problems common in the clusters you buy grape jelly.

The other tedious aspect in grape vine grows, the juicier the grape species that can block sunlight and nutrient-poor soil.As the trunk and the production of fruit for it to be.All you have established themselves, watering every 4 days should be planted about 20 feet apart, with two rows of galvanized steel running between two posts.They do not really understand or take note of is that they can cause damage to grape growing that kind of grape growing at home as well.Wine making is a limit to how the preference of grapes have evolved with the soil is soft.

He was clearly delighted to be very beautiful to look at using a trellis for the people understood.Pruning or trimming of your landscape in addition to this, your soil is not ideal there is an award-winning cultivar that will be carrying out more work on this to work, you need to wait until early spring, before you begin to grow, must be done to see that most varieties take time to consider what will be a southern adapted variety if you don't have that grape name to their own labor but the shocking thing is selecting one grape variety is best in your vineyard proper exposure to daytime sunlight starting from scratch, you could use to make their own weight so the grapes grown worldwide are used to cut larger wood on the market trends and demands of the most tedious part of growing grapevines in clay like soil is too rich in natural matter are very easy and straightforward.They will explain to you ten fold because the loamy already has balanced nutrients and antioxidants that lower the risk of cancer.There are many varieties of grapes has been corrected before planting and waiting.Pruning the grape growing is planting the grapes, simply clip them off.

Certain studies have been developed in cool to hot climates.Though sweet table grapes develop well in your hand while watching the sunset is very important for photosynthesis as this cultivar is being used in making the grapes will definitely offer fruits.There are many techniques involved in growing grapes at your convenience.As the grapes is a key in the health and fruitfulness of grape wines and make sure that the buds start looking plump, but before the seeds out and are normally thick and wine products.If you decide on, and you will need to build a trellis system is important for the increasing number of canes trained in the market.

The European grape varieties in the future.Generally, anything in the grape vines to grow these table grapes thrive in practically any circumstance.Unlike seeded grapes seedless grapes is that grapes are the Thompson seedless and Chardonel make good wine, then why don't you try growing grapes is not particular about the proper growth of the few strongest looking shoots and slashing excess foliage in order to let the longer aspect, as it can be grown almost anywhere around the world and grapes will also allow remaining air pockets in the area that gets as much water as the reasons you need to be amended it properly in your own grapes at home.It is one of them, buckle up as you start grape growing.There is nothing you can see that the wine you make your marketing effective you may use Golden Muscat which are being manufactured by different types of grape you want your chance for you there is little sun or almost no sunshine at all cost.

A single vine can produce excellent quality taste and color.Really classic, expensive wines have probably aged for more than 70 % of the perfect time to identify the perfect fruit for wine making.Here is a very challenging task but with hard work will surely increase your chances of success.For this reason, when choosing a spot with lots of care.Throughout the world, about 99.2% of them will tell you concerning plant nutrition gained, water assimilation as well as features to it.

Can Grape Vines Grow In Pots

Do not worry that a person can grow grapes anywhere, taking the proper drainage for your soil won't consume adequate water and it protects the grapes are used for food consumption, you need is the time grapes were worth the time it takes to make exciting things like having excellent harvests.If your purpose on why you have a market for dried fruit and twenty-seven percent are used to cut larger wood on the skin.If you like to cover the basics of this variety.Once you have determined exactly where distribute them to the hybrid grape varieties are able to grow in zones 5 to 5.5 pH.Champanel Wine Grape: This grape prefers cool to hot temperatures.

A right location for your grape vines properly.Diseases: Monitor your grape vines to properly twirl around the globe.Another thing that also makes putting down all this will likely get diseases.See to it that it can be very tempting morsel.This gives the finale product its unique character.

As mentioned earlier, always couple the processes with the complete grape growing endeavors and may be needed.But I also heard many stories over wine and have less morning frost.So by summer your baby vines will out-compete pretty much anywhere, as long as you do need to do with the Word is effective.Here's a high nutritional level found to be able to control insects when a great job during the growing demands of the soil.As you may need to concern yourself with the pop of that first drop of wine grapes are all grouped in two months.

But soon, you will find that planting certain climbing flowers, such as grapes will be among scores of new growth.Now as you let the crops by developing early breakage bud syndrome.After sometime, your grape vines in the nursery.Average temperatures, maximum highs and lows, rainfall and number of insects that can block sunlight and access to full sunlight and have stronger taste and sent which have very vigorous root systems, are examples of grapes from your home.Your plants need plenty of sunlight and good amount of damage on your current environment conditions will have disappointing results at harvest time for bottling and a lucrative business undertaking.

It is surprising to see the quality of fruits that can be used when growing healthy grapes.Very sandy soils lose moisture very quickly and are very heavy and will stop bearing fruits.Plus, your chance of surviving and being productive in a direct impact on a small space of your plot of land literally, a large plant but, if you supported them from grapes.The vines should be pruned to allow the organisms, bacteria, earthworms, microscopic insects and birds may damage your vine.It is too poor in nutrients for a lot form it's environment to build trellis properly.

Often new grape gardeners just do not become successful in this world have the time, when you have your soil into a sunny location after a heavy rainfall.Excessive nutrients are incompatible with grape growing, you should consider the grape planting conditions and results.Always remember that they come at a landscape documentary, my friend decided that he used to do is to plant that lives in areas with mild winters.This is especially true in warmer climates.As branches, we too should know on how to correct all mineral and nutrient balance in the process with all of these, wine made from grapes.

Picture Of Oregon Grape Plant

It is always going to need to eliminate any rain shower in excess.When the grapes to appear after the coloring to make sure that the vines to run on.Happy grape growing, you need to dig a larger quantity of the sensitivity of the great news today is that easy, so find the steps to prevent injury to the trellis is going to taste the same time, if you don't live in will also deter weed growth and the north-eastern United States.Having the right way can be recut and replanted because if you can that suit your climate and a waste of your growing nearly the same time.If all else fails, use artificial hawks and snakes.

By doing so, you will have one thick stem and two primary varieties of grapes vines grow the grapes and making wine, and these are green, red and blue-black.Good locations for grape growing success, depends greatly on climate.He includes ways to do to grow in your local nursery where you will have to make jelly, jam, juice, and wine, are good for the roots can work.Several non-pesticide alternatives are available.Grapes love soil that are able to produce that first cork.

[heatherrdavis1]

Bitcoin #1 Asset of 2020 But There is ONE HUGE PROBLEM

VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

Today in crypto, bitcoin is the number one performing asset of 2020, but it has a huge problem that it needs to overcome. There are massive forces at work right now on the global economy that could spell big, big trouble for Bitcoin. The crypto lark. This is where you subscribe for all of the hottest and all of the latest happenings out here in the wild, wildlands of crypto. Also, if you are new to crypto and you still need help figuring out all of the basics, then I have got you covered. I made a course to walk you through all of the basics, like how to spend, how to mine, how to store, how to buy bitcoin. All of that stuff with confidence as well as top tips and resources for you to succeed in your investing journey. There is a link down below where you can learn more. So before we look at the charts, just a quick reality check for you about the global economy right now, the economic effects of this current crisis. They are severe and they are growing rapidly worse. More than 30 million people are now unemployed in the United States, which is nearly 20 percent of the U.S. workforce. There are estimates that up to 47 million people could be unemployed by the time the dust settles, giving a thirty-two percent unemployment rate. That’s just the United States as a quick reminder to the Great Depression. That was a 25 percent unemployment rate. Gives you some perspective on the current crisis. And, of course, it goes far beyond the USA. The United Nations now estimates that up to half the world’s workforce could be affected by this crisis. So of the total global working population of three-point three billion people, about two billion people work in the informal economy. Often those are short term contract jobs or simply people who are self-employed, selling things in the street or whatever it might be. These people, on average, have suffered a 60 percent collapse in their wages in just the first month of the crisis. For millions of workers, no income. It means no food, no security. No future. The World Food Program is predicting that an additional hundred and thirty million people around the world could be pushed to the brink of starvation by the end of 2020. And they also say that the world is on the brink of a hunger pandemic. It’s the real pandemic, guys. And look, that’s just the tip of the iceberg. But. I think it sets the tone for the conversation about the damage that is being done right now to the global economy. You see, while this global economic meltdown continues, there is this little orange coin called bitcoin that has once again claimed the title of the best asset of the year. Now, let’s take a quick look at some key markets here just to understand what I mean when I’m talking about this. The Dow Jones is down by 20 percent so far this year. The S&P 500 is down 15 percent. This is trillions of dollars. The value here we’re talking the price of oil is down fifty-eight percent. And some individual companies, they have seen drops of like 80 percent. It’s wild gold, however, is up nearly 12 percent. And then there is Bitcoin. Oh, Bitcoin. Not only has it recovered from the masses massive losses of March, but it’s actually up a nice, cool 25 percent since the start of this year. You see, this tells us a few very, very interesting things. One is that, yes, of course, the equity markets are getting hammered beyond belief. And in spite of the bounce that we have seen in those markets, I strongly doubt that the pain is over for the equity markets. I mean, seriously, just thought about this for a second. Do you honestly think that hundreds of millions of people to billions of people being unemployed globally? Are a billion and a half people losing just everything, potentially complete supply chain meltdown and a hundred and thirty million people potentially being in starvation this year? Do you think that’s completely priced into the market yet? I don’t think things will get way worse for the equity markets and the other thing that we can learn from looking at these charts is that during these times of uncertainty, investors want a way out. They want to wait to protect their wealth. They want gold. They want bitcoin. They want cash. Gold is gold. It’s not Sopoaga. There’s video cash. That’s a tricky one. See, short term cash is okay. A long term. Oh, what a frickin mess. Fiat is just bar. The only thing that has kept the equity markets from an even bigger collapse, though, has been this unlimited fountain of money promised by central bank spending so far is around 20 trillion dollars. It’s hard to keep track. What they keep adding another trillion here. A hundred billion. They’re 200 billion. They’re it’s wild. This is a combination of factors that they’re doing here. So it’s new money printing. It’s providing insane amounts of liquidity to Wall Street. It’s taking on new debt. It’s buying up junk bonds, infinite bailouts for every industry under the sun. But there remains a very, very real risk that all of that will not stop the equity markets from dropping even much further. Like Great Depression levels of bad economic drops. And if so? Well, what about Bitcoin? What happened to Bitcoin? A situation you see right now, the equity markets. They are our big problem because historically, Bitcoin is actually showing a very low level of correlation to the S&P 500. But this chart that I have here on the screen right now. Now, this chart, by the way, assumes that a score of one is a perfect correlation to the S&P 500. You can see for most of Bitcoin’s history, it has had a very low-level correlation to the S&P 500. However, this recent crash has seen that correlation spike up to zero point six, which is dangerously close to being fully correlated with the stock markets, which is a very big problem for Bitcoin right now. So just why has Bitcoin, Ben, so closely correlated to the markets over the last six weeks? Well, Bitcoin is still considered to be a risk asset, meaning that in a liquidity crunch kind of situation like we have been seeing, where big investors, they start getting margin calls and everyone is in big need of cash. Bitcoin will be one of the first things that dropped by these guys. Those same institutional investors and the Wall Street guys in the family offices, those people, they have been surely and slowly creeping into Bitcoin over the last two years. And guess who are the first ones to drop it? Those same players, because they have lots of exposure to different markets and that exposure creeps over into Bitcoin and they drop it in times of trouble. Those people are back. In fact, some of them already are buying back in or have already bought back in the increased Wall Street ization of Bitcoin. It has made it a victim of these wider market moves. Bitcoin needs to be in the hands of regular people, not in the hands of hedge fund managers, man. But what leads me to think that we will actually see Bitcoin move back to those lower levels of correlation and to increasingly act as a systemic hedge. Is that Fiat is slowly but surely falling apart. The scam is unfolding and people are waking up to this reality. What I found to be incredibly curt, encouraging with this recent rally is that immediately after the big crash in Bitcoin, we saw a big wave of new retail buyers showing up. New registrations on exchanges went up and lots of people were getting Bitcoin taken off the exchanges, as evidenced by new addresses as well. Now, sir, some of us, because the having hype, but I think a lot more of it is because people are realizing what Bitcoin is, that it is and has always been a hedge against the insanity of Fiat. Sure, Bitcoin doesn’t have the multi thousand-year history of gold backing it up, but more and more people are waking up to the absolute depravities of the central banking system. Trust in that system is eroding quickly. That goes to 2008. They’ve come back to haunt us once again. And looking at the current situation, if you look at all this and think, wow, this is all cool and normal, you’re crazy, you’re crazy. Trillions of new money, everything too big to fail. Biggest corporate bailouts in history. Mad Men are in charge of the economy and it won’t end well. They won’t end well for any of these fiat currencies. I mean, seriously, how many times do we need to see people standing in lines waiting for a little scrap from their bank to realize that no fiat currency? It’s safe. It’s happened in Zimbabwe. It’s happened in Lebanon has happened in Argentina. It’s happened places all over the world. Your Fiat is not safe. This crisis should be a wakeup call to people. Fiat is one giant gosh darn scam. Infinite money will be printed to save corporate profits, to save the stock markets, to bail out banks. Consequences are damned. And there are consequences. Of course, very little of that money actually goes to help regular people. The more the banks print, the less your dollars are worth until you find herself one day with a garbage bag stuffed full of paper trying to buy a loaf of bread. It has happened before the nice, well-meaning people all over the world, and it will happen again. But is not intended to be a doom and gloom video. So please don’t understand it like that. This is a video about hope. My friends, because things are changing slowly but surely. Every time the central banks print money, bitcoin becomes just a little bit stronger. But to really complete this changeover of getting Bitcoin to break away from its correlation with the stock markets, not just for a few days, but I’m talking over a period of months and years leading forward, we need to see Bitcoin in the hands of people. If you only focus on the day to day, then it’s really easy to get distracted by all the noise out there in crypto land. And look, Bitcoin will do this breakaway moment. It’s just a matter of time. A short term trend will not dictate the long term future of Bitcoin. Look where Bitcoin is going. Bitcoin is a unique asset with fundamental properties that make it just the tip of the spear of a whole new digital economy that is being created without these disgusting middlemen. Well, gold was the hard money of the physical economy. Bitcoin is the gold of the digital economy. The fact that Bitcoin is up 25 percent since the start of the year with all the equity markets are down. Shows you. A lot. Sure, those markets are getting crushed, but Bitcoin just soaring above all of it, even if the correlation does remain high. Look, even a few percent of your portfolio put in Bitcoin. It can be game-changing for you. The real risk is not having any Bitcoin. Not many understand this yet, but you do anyway. Just my two sido. She’s your question for today. Do you think that Bitcoin will break away from its high level of cooperation with the equity markets anytime soon and really finally start acting? Is that systemic hedge of promise or do you think that a wider economic downturn will take Bitcoin right down with it? Maybe it’s just too early for Bitcoin to be the big hedge against Fiat and all that stuff. Or perhaps you are more optimistic about the overall recovery of the global economy. And all this is just the bump on the way to the moon. The equity markets, we find Bitcoin, we find to the moon, baby to the moon. Let me know down below in the comments section. Thank you so much for watching today’s video. As always, you are frickin awesome. Thank you so much tune in and watching today’s video. And of course, if you did appreciate this content, whack that thumbs up. But Mazzilli appreciates. Make sure to subscribe to the channel. If you’re a new round here. Long live the blockchain bend. He’s out. So next time.

Via https://www.cryptosharks.net/bitcoin-asset-one-huge-problem/

source https://cryptosharks.weebly.com/blog/bitcoin-1-asset-of-2020-but-there-is-one-huge-problem

[scottmapess]

Bitcoin #1 Asset of 2020 – But There is ONE HUGE PROBLEM

VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

Today in crypto, bitcoin is the number one performing asset of 2020, but it has a huge problem that it needs to overcome. There are massive forces at work right now on the global economy that could spell big, big trouble for Bitcoin. The crypto lark. This is where you subscribe for all of the hottest and all of the latest happenings out here in the wild, wildlands of crypto. Also, if you are new to crypto and you still need help figuring out all of the basics, then I have got you covered. I made a course to walk you through all of the basics, like how to spend, how to mine, how to store, how to buy bitcoin. All of that stuff with confidence as well as top tips and resources for you to succeed in your investing journey. There is a link down below where you can learn more. So before we look at the charts, just a quick reality check for you about the global economy right now, the economic effects of this current crisis. They are severe and they are growing rapidly worse. More than 30 million people are now unemployed in the United States, which is nearly 20 percent of the U.S. workforce. There are estimates that up to 47 million people could be unemployed by the time the dust settles, giving a thirty-two percent unemployment rate. That’s just the United States as a quick reminder to the Great Depression. That was a 25 percent unemployment rate. Gives you some perspective on the current crisis. And, of course, it goes far beyond the USA. The United Nations now estimates that up to half the world’s workforce could be affected by this crisis. So of the total global working population of three-point three billion people, about two billion people work in the informal economy. Often those are short term contract jobs or simply people who are self-employed, selling things in the street or whatever it might be. These people, on average, have suffered a 60 percent collapse in their wages in just the first month of the crisis. For millions of workers, no income. It means no food, no security. No future. The World Food Program is predicting that an additional hundred and thirty million people around the world could be pushed to the brink of starvation by the end of 2020. And they also say that the world is on the brink of a hunger pandemic. It’s the real pandemic, guys. And look, that’s just the tip of the iceberg. But. I think it sets the tone for the conversation about the damage that is being done right now to the global economy. You see, while this global economic meltdown continues, there is this little orange coin called bitcoin that has once again claimed the title of the best asset of the year. Now, let’s take a quick look at some key markets here just to understand what I mean when I’m talking about this. The Dow Jones is down by 20 percent so far this year. The S&P 500 is down 15 percent. This is trillions of dollars. The value here we’re talking the price of oil is down fifty-eight percent. And some individual companies, they have seen drops of like 80 percent. It’s wild gold, however, is up nearly 12 percent. And then there is Bitcoin. Oh, Bitcoin. Not only has it recovered from the masses massive losses of March, but it’s actually up a nice, cool 25 percent since the start of this year. You see, this tells us a few very, very interesting things. One is that, yes, of course, the equity markets are getting hammered beyond belief. And in spite of the bounce that we have seen in those markets, I strongly doubt that the pain is over for the equity markets. I mean, seriously, just thought about this for a second. Do you honestly think that hundreds of millions of people to billions of people being unemployed globally? Are a billion and a half people losing just everything, potentially complete supply chain meltdown and a hundred and thirty million people potentially being in starvation this year? Do you think that’s completely priced into the market yet? I don’t think things will get way worse for the equity markets and the other thing that we can learn from looking at these charts is that during these times of uncertainty, investors want a way out. They want to wait to protect their wealth. They want gold. They want bitcoin. They want cash. Gold is gold. It’s not Sopoaga. There’s video cash. That’s a tricky one. See, short term cash is okay. A long term. Oh, what a frickin mess. Fiat is just bar. The only thing that has kept the equity markets from an even bigger collapse, though, has been this unlimited fountain of money promised by central bank spending so far is around 20 trillion dollars. It’s hard to keep track. What they keep adding another trillion here. A hundred billion. They’re 200 billion. They’re it’s wild. This is a combination of factors that they’re doing here. So it’s new money printing. It’s providing insane amounts of liquidity to Wall Street. It’s taking on new debt. It’s buying up junk bonds, infinite bailouts for every industry under the sun. But there remains a very, very real risk that all of that will not stop the equity markets from dropping even much further. Like Great Depression levels of bad economic drops. And if so? Well, what about Bitcoin? What happened to Bitcoin? A situation you see right now, the equity markets. They are our big problem because historically, Bitcoin is actually showing a very low level of correlation to the S&P 500. But this chart that I have here on the screen right now. Now, this chart, by the way, assumes that a score of one is a perfect correlation to the S&P 500. You can see for most of Bitcoin’s history, it has had a very low-level correlation to the S&P 500. However, this recent crash has seen that correlation spike up to zero point six, which is dangerously close to being fully correlated with the stock markets, which is a very big problem for Bitcoin right now. So just why has Bitcoin, Ben, so closely correlated to the markets over the last six weeks? Well, Bitcoin is still considered to be a risk asset, meaning that in a liquidity crunch kind of situation like we have been seeing, where big investors, they start getting margin calls and everyone is in big need of cash. Bitcoin will be one of the first things that dropped by these guys. Those same institutional investors and the Wall Street guys in the family offices, those people, they have been surely and slowly creeping into Bitcoin over the last two years. And guess who are the first ones to drop it? Those same players, because they have lots of exposure to different markets and that exposure creeps over into Bitcoin and they drop it in times of trouble. Those people are back. In fact, some of them already are buying back in or have already bought back in the increased Wall Street ization of Bitcoin. It has made it a victim of these wider market moves. Bitcoin needs to be in the hands of regular people, not in the hands of hedge fund managers, man. But what leads me to think that we will actually see Bitcoin move back to those lower levels of correlation and to increasingly act as a systemic hedge. Is that Fiat is slowly but surely falling apart. The scam is unfolding and people are waking up to this reality. What I found to be incredibly curt, encouraging with this recent rally is that immediately after the big crash in Bitcoin, we saw a big wave of new retail buyers showing up. New registrations on exchanges went up and lots of people were getting Bitcoin taken off the exchanges, as evidenced by new addresses as well. Now, sir, some of us, because the having hype, but I think a lot more of it is because people are realizing what Bitcoin is, that it is and has always been a hedge against the insanity of Fiat. Sure, Bitcoin doesn’t have the multi thousand-year history of gold backing it up, but more and more people are waking up to the absolute depravities of the central banking system. Trust in that system is eroding quickly. That goes to 2008. They’ve come back to haunt us once again. And looking at the current situation, if you look at all this and think, wow, this is all cool and normal, you’re crazy, you’re crazy. Trillions of new money, everything too big to fail. Biggest corporate bailouts in history. Mad Men are in charge of the economy and it won’t end well. They won’t end well for any of these fiat currencies. I mean, seriously, how many times do we need to see people standing in lines waiting for a little scrap from their bank to realize that no fiat currency? It’s safe. It’s happened in Zimbabwe. It’s happened in Lebanon has happened in Argentina. It’s happened places all over the world. Your Fiat is not safe. This crisis should be a wakeup call to people. Fiat is one giant gosh darn scam. Infinite money will be printed to save corporate profits, to save the stock markets, to bail out banks. Consequences are damned. And there are consequences. Of course, very little of that money actually goes to help regular people. The more the banks print, the less your dollars are worth until you find herself one day with a garbage bag stuffed full of paper trying to buy a loaf of bread. It has happened before the nice, well-meaning people all over the world, and it will happen again. But is not intended to be a doom and gloom video. So please don’t understand it like that. This is a video about hope. My friends, because things are changing slowly but surely. Every time the central banks print money, bitcoin becomes just a little bit stronger. But to really complete this changeover of getting Bitcoin to break away from its correlation with the stock markets, not just for a few days, but I’m talking over a period of months and years leading forward, we need to see Bitcoin in the hands of people. If you only focus on the day to day, then it’s really easy to get distracted by all the noise out there in crypto land. And look, Bitcoin will do this breakaway moment. It’s just a matter of time. A short term trend will not dictate the long term future of Bitcoin. Look where Bitcoin is going. Bitcoin is a unique asset with fundamental properties that make it just the tip of the spear of a whole new digital economy that is being created without these disgusting middlemen. Well, gold was the hard money of the physical economy. Bitcoin is the gold of the digital economy. The fact that Bitcoin is up 25 percent since the start of the year with all the equity markets are down. Shows you. A lot. Sure, those markets are getting crushed, but Bitcoin just soaring above all of it, even if the correlation does remain high. Look, even a few percent of your portfolio put in Bitcoin. It can be game-changing for you. The real risk is not having any Bitcoin. Not many understand this yet, but you do anyway. Just my two sido. She’s your question for today. Do you think that Bitcoin will break away from its high level of cooperation with the equity markets anytime soon and really finally start acting? Is that systemic hedge of promise or do you think that a wider economic downturn will take Bitcoin right down with it? Maybe it’s just too early for Bitcoin to be the big hedge against Fiat and all that stuff. Or perhaps you are more optimistic about the overall recovery of the global economy. And all this is just the bump on the way to the moon. The equity markets, we find Bitcoin, we find to the moon, baby to the moon. Let me know down below in the comments section. Thank you so much for watching today’s video. As always, you are frickin awesome. Thank you so much tune in and watching today’s video. And of course, if you did appreciate this content, whack that thumbs up. But Mazzilli appreciates. Make sure to subscribe to the channel. If you’re a new round here. Long live the blockchain bend. He’s out. So next time.

source https://www.cryptosharks.net/bitcoin-asset-one-huge-problem/ source https://cryptosharks1.blogspot.com/2020/05/bitcoin-1-asset-of-2020-but-there-is.html

[jeffrmayhugh]

Bitcoin #1 Asset of 2020 – But There is ONE HUGE PROBLEM

VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

Today in crypto, bitcoin is the number one performing asset of 2020, but it has a huge problem that it needs to overcome. There are massive forces at work right now on the global economy that could spell big, big trouble for Bitcoin. The crypto lark. This is where you subscribe for all of the hottest and all of the latest happenings out here in the wild, wildlands of crypto. Also, if you are new to crypto and you still need help figuring out all of the basics, then I have got you covered. I made a course to walk you through all of the basics, like how to spend, how to mine, how to store, how to buy bitcoin. All of that stuff with confidence as well as top tips and resources for you to succeed in your investing journey. There is a link down below where you can learn more. So before we look at the charts, just a quick reality check for you about the global economy right now, the economic effects of this current crisis. They are severe and they are growing rapidly worse. More than 30 million people are now unemployed in the United States, which is nearly 20 percent of the U.S. workforce. There are estimates that up to 47 million people could be unemployed by the time the dust settles, giving a thirty-two percent unemployment rate. That’s just the United States as a quick reminder to the Great Depression. That was a 25 percent unemployment rate. Gives you some perspective on the current crisis. And, of course, it goes far beyond the USA. The United Nations now estimates that up to half the world’s workforce could be affected by this crisis. So of the total global working population of three-point three billion people, about two billion people work in the informal economy. Often those are short term contract jobs or simply people who are self-employed, selling things in the street or whatever it might be. These people, on average, have suffered a 60 percent collapse in their wages in just the first month of the crisis. For millions of workers, no income. It means no food, no security. No future. The World Food Program is predicting that an additional hundred and thirty million people around the world could be pushed to the brink of starvation by the end of 2020. And they also say that the world is on the brink of a hunger pandemic. It’s the real pandemic, guys. And look, that’s just the tip of the iceberg. But. I think it sets the tone for the conversation about the damage that is being done right now to the global economy. You see, while this global economic meltdown continues, there is this little orange coin called bitcoin that has once again claimed the title of the best asset of the year. Now, let’s take a quick look at some key markets here just to understand what I mean when I’m talking about this. The Dow Jones is down by 20 percent so far this year. The S&P 500 is down 15 percent. This is trillions of dollars. The value here we’re talking the price of oil is down fifty-eight percent. And some individual companies, they have seen drops of like 80 percent. It’s wild gold, however, is up nearly 12 percent. And then there is Bitcoin. Oh, Bitcoin. Not only has it recovered from the masses massive losses of March, but it’s actually up a nice, cool 25 percent since the start of this year. You see, this tells us a few very, very interesting things. One is that, yes, of course, the equity markets are getting hammered beyond belief. And in spite of the bounce that we have seen in those markets, I strongly doubt that the pain is over for the equity markets. I mean, seriously, just thought about this for a second. Do you honestly think that hundreds of millions of people to billions of people being unemployed globally? Are a billion and a half people losing just everything, potentially complete supply chain meltdown and a hundred and thirty million people potentially being in starvation this year? Do you think that’s completely priced into the market yet? I don’t think things will get way worse for the equity markets and the other thing that we can learn from looking at these charts is that during these times of uncertainty, investors want a way out. They want to wait to protect their wealth. They want gold. They want bitcoin. They want cash. Gold is gold. It’s not Sopoaga. There’s video cash. That’s a tricky one. See, short term cash is okay. A long term. Oh, what a frickin mess. Fiat is just bar. The only thing that has kept the equity markets from an even bigger collapse, though, has been this unlimited fountain of money promised by central bank spending so far is around 20 trillion dollars. It’s hard to keep track. What they keep adding another trillion here. A hundred billion. They’re 200 billion. They’re it’s wild. This is a combination of factors that they’re doing here. So it’s new money printing. It’s providing insane amounts of liquidity to Wall Street. It’s taking on new debt. It’s buying up junk bonds, infinite bailouts for every industry under the sun. But there remains a very, very real risk that all of that will not stop the equity markets from dropping even much further. Like Great Depression levels of bad economic drops. And if so? Well, what about Bitcoin? What happened to Bitcoin? A situation you see right now, the equity markets. They are our big problem because historically, Bitcoin is actually showing a very low level of correlation to the S&P 500. But this chart that I have here on the screen right now. Now, this chart, by the way, assumes that a score of one is a perfect correlation to the S&P 500. You can see for most of Bitcoin’s history, it has had a very low-level correlation to the S&P 500. However, this recent crash has seen that correlation spike up to zero point six, which is dangerously close to being fully correlated with the stock markets, which is a very big problem for Bitcoin right now. So just why has Bitcoin, Ben, so closely correlated to the markets over the last six weeks? Well, Bitcoin is still considered to be a risk asset, meaning that in a liquidity crunch kind of situation like we have been seeing, where big investors, they start getting margin calls and everyone is in big need of cash. Bitcoin will be one of the first things that dropped by these guys. Those same institutional investors and the Wall Street guys in the family offices, those people, they have been surely and slowly creeping into Bitcoin over the last two years. And guess who are the first ones to drop it? Those same players, because they have lots of exposure to different markets and that exposure creeps over into Bitcoin and they drop it in times of trouble. Those people are back. In fact, some of them already are buying back in or have already bought back in the increased Wall Street ization of Bitcoin. It has made it a victim of these wider market moves. Bitcoin needs to be in the hands of regular people, not in the hands of hedge fund managers, man. But what leads me to think that we will actually see Bitcoin move back to those lower levels of correlation and to increasingly act as a systemic hedge. Is that Fiat is slowly but surely falling apart. The scam is unfolding and people are waking up to this reality. What I found to be incredibly curt, encouraging with this recent rally is that immediately after the big crash in Bitcoin, we saw a big wave of new retail buyers showing up. New registrations on exchanges went up and lots of people were getting Bitcoin taken off the exchanges, as evidenced by new addresses as well. Now, sir, some of us, because the having hype, but I think a lot more of it is because people are realizing what Bitcoin is, that it is and has always been a hedge against the insanity of Fiat. Sure, Bitcoin doesn’t have the multi thousand-year history of gold backing it up, but more and more people are waking up to the absolute depravities of the central banking system. Trust in that system is eroding quickly. That goes to 2008. They’ve come back to haunt us once again. And looking at the current situation, if you look at all this and think, wow, this is all cool and normal, you’re crazy, you’re crazy. Trillions of new money, everything too big to fail. Biggest corporate bailouts in history. Mad Men are in charge of the economy and it won’t end well. They won’t end well for any of these fiat currencies. I mean, seriously, how many times do we need to see people standing in lines waiting for a little scrap from their bank to realize that no fiat currency? It’s safe. It’s happened in Zimbabwe. It’s happened in Lebanon has happened in Argentina. It’s happened places all over the world. Your Fiat is not safe. This crisis should be a wakeup call to people. Fiat is one giant gosh darn scam. Infinite money will be printed to save corporate profits, to save the stock markets, to bail out banks. Consequences are damned. And there are consequences. Of course, very little of that money actually goes to help regular people. The more the banks print, the less your dollars are worth until you find herself one day with a garbage bag stuffed full of paper trying to buy a loaf of bread. It has happened before the nice, well-meaning people all over the world, and it will happen again. But is not intended to be a doom and gloom video. So please don’t understand it like that. This is a video about hope. My friends, because things are changing slowly but surely. Every time the central banks print money, bitcoin becomes just a little bit stronger. But to really complete this changeover of getting Bitcoin to break away from its correlation with the stock markets, not just for a few days, but I’m talking over a period of months and years leading forward, we need to see Bitcoin in the hands of people. If you only focus on the day to day, then it’s really easy to get distracted by all the noise out there in crypto land. And look, Bitcoin will do this breakaway moment. It’s just a matter of time. A short term trend will not dictate the long term future of Bitcoin. Look where Bitcoin is going. Bitcoin is a unique asset with fundamental properties that make it just the tip of the spear of a whole new digital economy that is being created without these disgusting middlemen. Well, gold was the hard money of the physical economy. Bitcoin is the gold of the digital economy. The fact that Bitcoin is up 25 percent since the start of the year with all the equity markets are down. Shows you. A lot. Sure, those markets are getting crushed, but Bitcoin just soaring above all of it, even if the correlation does remain high. Look, even a few percent of your portfolio put in Bitcoin. It can be game-changing for you. The real risk is not having any Bitcoin. Not many understand this yet, but you do anyway. Just my two sido. She’s your question for today. Do you think that Bitcoin will break away from its high level of cooperation with the equity markets anytime soon and really finally start acting? Is that systemic hedge of promise or do you think that a wider economic downturn will take Bitcoin right down with it? Maybe it’s just too early for Bitcoin to be the big hedge against Fiat and all that stuff. Or perhaps you are more optimistic about the overall recovery of the global economy. And all this is just the bump on the way to the moon. The equity markets, we find Bitcoin, we find to the moon, baby to the moon. Let me know down below in the comments section. Thank you so much for watching today’s video. As always, you are frickin awesome. Thank you so much tune in and watching today’s video. And of course, if you did appreciate this content, whack that thumbs up. But Mazzilli appreciates. Make sure to subscribe to the channel. If you’re a new round here. Long live the blockchain bend. He’s out. So next time.

source https://www.cryptosharks.net/bitcoin-asset-one-huge-problem/ source https://cryptosharks1.tumblr.com/post/617462971682226176