#edward elric is a little shit

[schrijverr]

The Long Game

Ed has to attend a military gala and Roy is dreading it. However, he is surprised to discover that Ed is more aware of putting on a show and playing a good little soldier.

On AO3.

Ships: none

Warnings: none

~~~~

Roy hates military galas with a passion, though no one but close friends would know that about him and he likes to keep it that way.

It’s a whole evening of schmoozing, which, granted, he is very good at, but it’s tiring. The persona he has crafted for himself to get others to underestimate them is chatty and Roy discovered too late that he is more introverted than that, so playing it can become exhaustive.

However, that’s not why he’s apprehensive about this particular gala. No, that would be because Fullmetal will be in attendance.

It would be the first time since his inauguration into the military that he was to attend. He had joined up just after the gala had been thrown and by the time his first gala would roll around, he had messed up his automail. While all higher ups had wanted to meet the famous young prodigy, none were about to force a child amputee to show up for their own sakes, when he needed medical attention.

This year, no such stroke of luck had occurred and the Major was expected right alongside Roy to both their ire.

Roy is sure Fullmetal isn’t pleased, but Roy doubts he is more displeased than Roy. Though, displeased might be the wrong word. It’s more like cautious or afraid. Not of Fullmetal or for him, but for Roy himself.

You see, Roy has been working with the little twerp for over two years now and while the kid’s work reflects back great on Roy, his subordination leaves much to be desired. So having him in the room with all Roy’s higher ups will kill any reputation he brought.

It can only be a disaster.

Still, Fullmetal not showing up again might be even worse for Roy’s reputation, so there is no avoiding it, only damage control.

During the days leading up to the gala, Roy spends as much time as he can telling Edward all about military protocol and respect, hoping it’ll stick. He presses home how important good impression are. How they can influence how much people are willing to put a word in for him, help him along, provide funds. Anything to make Fullmetal care.

He has Hawkeye accompany Ed to a tailor, hoping that her presence will at least make him own a proper military uniform. Maybe even convince him to wear it, though his hopes aren’t too high for that.

In the end, Roy has to contend himself with the fact that he tried as hard as he could to make Fullmetal behave and prepare to deal with the fall out once it happens.

The gala is today and there is really no turning back. Roy is waiting for Ed alongside Vanessa, his sister, who will be playing his date tonight, spending the first half of the evening hanging of Roy’s arm and the latter half socializing and gathering intelligence for Madame Christmas.

Roy has complained to her and his foster mom about Fullmetal at length, telling them how much the brat could mess up for him. They understand his concerns, but both have spend most of their time laughing at his misery.

However, tonight Vanessa is involved herself and has a little more compassion for him. She assures him: “He’ll be on time, Roy. It’s not late yet, he still has time.”

“On time is late,” Roy frowns, checking his pocket watch, before scanning the streets for the familiar red coat, hoping Ed will get here soon.

“Isn’t that him over there?” Vanessa breaks him out of his thoughts, pointing at someone down the streets.

“Where?” Roy asks, when he doesn’t immediate spot Fullmetal.

“There. Little with blond hair right? In the uniform,” Vanessa answers, giving more detail so Roy can find him.

At the mention of a uniform, Roy starts to doubt she has the right person, but once his eyes land on who she’s pointing at, he can’t deny that it is indeed Fullmetal. Fullmetal in a uniform. Who would’ve thought he’d see the day?

“I hardly recognized you, you look like a professional,” Roy teases the second Ed is within hearing range.

“Oh shut up, Colonel Bastard,” Fullmetal scowls, rolling his eyes. “I don’t know how, but you manage to look slimier than usual.”

As Roy expected, the uniform is an illusion no one will be falling for, Fullmetal is still his bratty, angry little self. Mentally he sighs and prepares himself for the long time. Externally, however, he smirks: “It’s a talent. Now let’s go.”

“Are you going to introduce us?” Vanessa asks innocently, purposefully getting on Roy’s nerves in the way only an older sister can.

“Yeah, bastard, I thought you were supposed to be good at this. Show some basic human curtsy,” naturally Fullmetal backed Vanessa. Roy’s life is going to be over if those two team up.

“You could have introduced yourself,” Roy points out in vain, before saying: “This is Vanessa, she’s accompanying me to the gala tonight. Vanessa, this is Major Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist.”

“It’s a delight to meet you, young man,” she thrills, extending her hand, seamlessly picking up on Ed’s continuous need to be seen as an adult and playing into it.

“Pleased to make your acquaintance,” Ed replies, taking her hand. “Just know that it’s totally okay if you never want to see this guy again after tonight,” he adds, pointing a thumb to Roy.

Roy knows that Fullmetal has a lifelong accomplice and supporter in Vanessa the second she lets out a genuine laugh at the comment, head thrown back and everything. She grins: “Thank you, Edward. I’ll keep it in mind.”

“Let’s go before we’re late,” Roy interrupts, before they can conspire against him some more.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Ed scowls again, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he reluctantly starts to walk in the direction of the venue.

Meanwhile, Roy offers Vanessa his arm, both of them taking a moment to ensure their masks are on properly, before following after the boy.

The venue is brightly lit and filled with people. Roy hopes to park Fullmetal at the food table, before doing the rounds, as well as keep him there for the rest of the night, maybe send Armstrong his way as a distraction to get Fullmetal to stay there.

However, that plan is thwarted when they arrive. A Brigadier General makes his way to them when he spots them, obviously having been looking out for at least one member of their party and Roy suspects who. Jovially, the Brigadier General greets: “Ah, Colonel Mustang and the Fullmetal Alchemist!”

To Roy’s surprise, it is Ed, who salutes first with Roy quickly following. He has only even seen the boy give mocking salutes or very reluctant ones, but this one comes across as natural, like Fullmetal does this often.

“No need for those formalities,” the Brigadier General waves their salutes away, before making his goal clear, though Roy had already suspected it. “Ah, another beautiful lady on your arm, Colonel? I’m sure she’s lovely company, so you’ll be okay if I borrow your subordinate for a moment.” He turns to Fullmetal. “There are quite a few people, who’d love to pick your brain, kid.”

Roy is about to step in before Fullmetal can loudly proclaim his maturity, but he is surprised again when Ed respectfully replies: “I’d be honored, sir.”

“Of course, no problem,” Roy dismisses Fullmetal, unsure if he’s making a mistake. It seems like Fullmetal is content to play his role of military dog, but Roy is very well aware of the short fuse the kid has.

However, insisting to go along might anger the Brigadier General, who obviously wants the glory of introducing the great Fullmetal Alchemist for himself. So, Roy has to be okay with keeping an eye on Fullmetal from the corner of his eye as he proceeds to do his own business.

In moments like this, he wishes Hawkeye wasn’t such a well known face by his side, so she could be here with him tonight to keep her keen eyes on Ed. Alas, he much prefers her eyes by him in the day by day to validate that, so he’ll have to trust his own spacial awareness and that of Vanessa to notice once it all goes to shit, as things often do in Fullmetal’s presence.

But as the gala continues on, Roy is surprised to be proven wrong. Very wrong.

Fullmetal pops up everywhere and in the most unexpected ways. He never sticks out for his usual reasons (insults, insubordination, loudness, etc), instead he’s anything but.

When Roy is talking to a Major General, who is inching towards a promotion that Roy wants to lift along with, when he spots Ed up ahead. The kid is being introduced to a proper General and he politely salutes the man.

A little while later, he is walking across the room to introduce Vanessa to a fellow Colonel that Madame Christmas needs some dirt on. As they do, they pass by a gaggle of state alchemists and Fullmetal is among them.

Roy recognizes one of he speakers as a Lieutenant Colonel, who is a bit too big for his britches. But still ranking above Fullmetal, which he seems to be aware of, because he is merely politely nodding along to the guy giving a soliloquy about his own alchemy.

Now, the guy isn’t a bad alchemist. In fact, Roy knows him to be reliable to have your back, even if he’ll be obnoxious the whole way through. However, Roy knows that Ed had his particular branch of alchemy mastered before he hit double digits, so his agreeable silence as he listens to the lecture is surprising.

Of course, Fullmetal loves alchemy more than anything, so this must have been one of the better conversations he’s had this evening. But Roy can’t help but be surprised that he isn’t showing off his genius as he is prone to do, showing up the alchemist and bruising the guy’s ego in the process, however unintentional it might have been.

The third time, Roy spots him, Vanessa even comments on it as they watch him bow politely at a group, before leaving the conversation. “I thought you said he was brash and rude, Roy. The perfect image of insubordination. That doesn’t look very about to be court martial-ed to me.”

“I think Fullmetal must be possessed,” Roy confides in her, unable to come up with a better explanation.

Fullmetal then finds them in the crowd again. He sees that they’re taking a break from polite society at the food table and gratefully makes him way over to them, smoothly avoiding any advances made to talk to him.

The boy lets out a breath of relieve when he finally makes it, stuffing a bread roll in his mouth without even greeting either of them.

Roy can’t help but remark: “Where did all the politeness go, huh? We’re not good enough for your manners, Fullmetal?” driven both out of curiosity and his natural tendency to tease his short-fused subordinate.

“Oh, please,” Ed rolls his eyes, “like you wouldn’t be totally freaked out if I was suddenly polite and nice to you. You’d probably think the world was ending.”

Since he claimed Fullmetal to be possessed moments earlier, Roy isn’t really able to deny that accusation. Not that it stops him from saying: “I’ve been asking for respect for over two years now, a little bit of it would be appreciated.”

“Your comment is heard and disregarded,” Fullmetal informs him bluntly and Roy is loathe to admit that the uncaring attitude of the teen is soothing after watching him be a perfect little toy soldier.

He doesn’t show that, however, instead choosing to say: “Well, it still would have been nice. I thought you were incapable of it, honestly. I’d ask if you were raised in a barn, but I’ve seen where you grew up.”

“Oi, don’t insult Resembool,” Fullmetal glares at him.

Vanessa probably saves all of them from Fullmetal’s first explosion of the night by saying: “I do have to agree with Roy. You have quite the reputation. It’s impressive that you actually have more control over your emotions than people think.”

Though hidden by a fluttered lash, the comment is a masked question. A request for more information without the target knowing. Vanessa truly is one of Madame Christmas’s girls.

And like so many men before him, Ed falls for it. He puffs up a bit, pride flooding his veins as he says: “Of course. Underestimation is the best tool. Besides, practice makes perfect, you don’t even know how many dinners I’ve had with corrupt officials.”

Roy has to hide a laugh at Vanessa’s surprised expression. She obviously hadn’t counted on her own experiences in life being anywhere near similar to Fullmetal’s, yet here she is.

The kid is oblivious as he goes on: “But I usually get to make them fall flat on their faces the next day. Can’t very much do that here, I still need these motherfuckers. Well, maybe, not all of them, but I don’t know which ones.”

Now Roy has the same experience that Vanessa had at the earlier part, though he has the added ill feeling that he is the one that dragged the kid into this life. This world of corruption, masks and concealment.

Fullmetal looks quite sad as he laments that he doesn’t get to make the government collapse by taking out all the corrupt officials he has spoken to tonight.

However, he soon has a grin on his face again when he says: “But I get to laugh at them behind their backs, so that’s a little satisfying. And who knows what the future will bring, I might get to pull the rug out from underneath all of them.”

It’s quite the surreal feeling to see Fullmetal be aware of the games of politics Roy played in every day and not just that, but be playing it himself as well. He isn’t playing it as much as Roy, but more than he had expected from the kid.

Ed truly grew up too fast and, despite himself, Roy mourns for Fullmetal’s childhood.

However, now that he’s aware of it, he can see the sparkle of glee in Fullmetal’s eyes whenever he salutes or says sir. That little bit of defiance, like he is in on some joke and everyone else isn’t. Well, everyone else besides Roy and Vanessa.

If he allows himself to be honest with himself, Roy is a little honored that Ed let him see behind the curtain, mask lifted for a second. But Roy tries not to think about that too much. Fullmetal has to remain a little at a distance or Roy will never be able to live with himself, even if he knows that allowing Ed into the military was for the best.

So instead he chooses to be amused with the kid’s antics, following him across the room in his periphery and mentally chuckling at all the wool he’s putting over peoples’ eyes.

He might still hate military galas with a passion, but Fullmetal makes them a little bit more bearable and he can’t help but hope he will be in attendance again next time.

~~

A/N:

I love it when Ed is a little cunning and Roy realizing it, because he thinks himself a master at chess and deception and I think it would be fun for him to see that side of Ed

[scarymonsters-andsupercreeps]

Meow

Original:

[thebeloathed]

They all could be switched around and it'd still be true

[athena-xiii]

Edward Elric my beloved. What a guy

[harperd]

Dropping a headcannon

I believe post promised day Edward uses a cane for mobility purposes after years of having automail impact his bones and shit there is NO WAY he is pain free or even comfortable so I believe he uses a cane most of the time to get around and if anyone says anything he disagrees with he smacks the cane against their shins while acting innocent.

[sydneighsays]

*a few months after Edward joined the army*

Roy viewing security footage : *Edward opens the door to the office building but the wind blows it back and smacks him*

Ed: *smacks it back* fuck you

Fuck you, stupid fuckin-

Fucker, stupid bitch

Bitch motherfucker

*middle fingers at door*

Fuckin bitch

*walks calmly into the building*

Roy: I don't know how to handle this. Do I punish him?

Havoc: fuck that door.

[deithe]

nothing will ever hit as hard as ed causing a civil uprising in liore in 03, and coming back to the city towards the end of the series to see how many people died and suffered because of his pride and arrogance believing he was saving the people of liore through "liberation". 03 fucks so hard in showing ed fucking up unbelievably bad while in the military, and being forced to confront that

[greebyao]

i think its very easy to forget that alphonse is also kind of a little shit because he has no facial expression besides constant armor induced mewing and owo but then you read the 4komas and other such extras like the games and he always says shit like niisan this is why youre not popular. its all your fault ed it always is. im taller and cooler and more handsome than my brother. this is the effect of being raised by edward elric, whos special skill is being a hater.

[shanastoryteller]

Happy birthday!!!! More FMA!

He’s fucking tired.

In Xerxes, he’s Van Edris. In Xerxes, he’s the son of a former slave, having narrowly escaped being born into his father’s fate by virtue of him being awarded freedom by the time of his birth. In Xerxes, he’s an uncommon commodity, an alchemist with a skill that hasn’t been seen since his father fucked off to who knows where.

In Amestris, he’s Edward Elric. In Amestris, he’s the son of Trisha Elric who was born free and died free because while there are lots of different forms of freedom, in Amestris there’s one that everyone shares. In Amestris, he’s unknown and unremarkable and no one gives a fuck about what he does.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” he says flatly.

This is what he gets for visiting his father’s country. It’s just fucking unfortunate that the really good alchemical texts are here.

He should have let Al (Van Altun, as they know him, even though the two of them having been using their Amestrian names almost their whole lives, regardless of what country they were in) do it. They’re not nearly as weird about him.

Pakor is alright, as far as kings go. He’s freed a lot of people, is poking at the laws of ownership that has governed his country for centuries to see if he can do anything about them without getting beheaded for it. He’s also known Ed since he was a barely able to walk, back when his father still made court appearances and brought the family along with him. Former slave against most talented alchemist in the country, and people tended to politely ignore the former. Hell, Ed’s been counting on the same thing since he was twelve.

Of course, now it’s coming back to bite him. People say he’s a genius, but if he was really smart he would have stayed far, far away from court. Like in Amestris, perhaps.

“You’re fluent in both languages,” Pakor says, coaxing.

“So are you,” he says accusingly. “We’re speaking Amestrian right now!”

Pakor sighs and switches to Xerxian. “You also speak Xingese and Drachman. You’re a difficult man to keep secrets from.”

“I’m also Amestrian!” he shouts. “And free, might I add! You can’t sell me off to slavery just to get some intel!”

“It’s not like we’ll brand you,” he says, affronted, and Ed is reminded that alright for a king is still pretty shitty. “We just need someone to do a little – double checking. To ensure the situation in Amestris is as it’s advertised.”

“You want to gift me to the Fuhrer to spy on him and you’re, what, just hoping he doesn’t notice that I understand everything and know everything and am, oh yeah, one of his citizens? I’ve been to Central before! With my luck, I’ll get recognized the first day here and then run out of Amestris! And, again, Amestris doesn’t have slaves! The leader of the country really can’t have one.”

Pakor sighs. “You’re very dramatic, Edris. It won’t be so bad. Here, I’ll say you’re my personal slave and that you’re on loan. It’ll be for cultural exchange purposes. He speaks Xingese, so you can communicate in that language without letting on you know Amestrian.”

Ed pinches the bridge of his nose. “This is a stupid fucking idea.”

“If you do this,” Pakor says, “I’ll give you the key to the royal library.”

Ed slowly lowers his hand, eyes narrowing. “I’ve been asking you to let me in there for years.”

“I figured I’d need to bargain it away eventually,” he says. “I was hoping you’d marry one of my daughters for it.” Having even light court obligations is bad enough, he’s in no way stupid enough to marry in. “You’re very difficult, you know. I’m your king. I shouldn’t have to bargain with you.”

“Tough shit,” Ed says, because Pakor may have known him for nearly twenty years, but that knowing goes both ways. Besides, he can’t piss him off because then he and Al will stop reparing all their shit bridges and infrastructure. “Fine. But if I lose my Amestrian citizenship over this, I’m going to be pissed.”

“Noted,” Pakor says brightly.

Uhg.

It doesn’t help that everything he’s heard about Fuhrer Mustang makes the man sound insufferable.

[mirakurutaimu]

have you ever talked about the origins of your sona/her design inspirations before? ive always really loved her design and i like hearing about how nice character designs come to be

here is the full tale

she started off as a mere picrew years ago

and then people drew fanart of that design whenever i started streaming (like this retro mimi model @catastrothy made)

and then at some point i thought "hm wouldn't it be cool if i paid an artist to make her design better" and then i approached noted good local artist @cnmchn and we went back and forth on some stuff and She were born proper

here is some other behind the scenez

hair accessories were considered at one point but then we thought of the ミ earrings and i just colored in one of her streaks black lmao

final design ended up using a combination of outfit elements from our two examples, rip to alt universe skirt spats and kneesocks short braid loose hoodie long shirt ribs mimi (she will be missed) (i should draw that sometime)

anyways thats all. thats da mimi roundup. sure hope read mores function on this site

edit: i forgot to mention design inspirations.

uh. riamu failgirl, kumbhira granblue, we almost stole astolfo's haircut sans hair vents (though I think it was actually edward elric who made me think 'braid'), vampy granblue. as for the tenets of her design i just wanted a cute, colorful, energetic, annoying, smug, punchable little beast to match my vibe. her fashion sense is like the complete opposite of mine tho lmao this little freak dresses in this skimpy summery crop top and short shorts getup and shit meanwhile i'm a jeans-all-year and longsleeves/hoodie at all times kinda bitch. at least she still melts in the heat like i do

anyways i figure i may as well dump some silly canon stuff here too:

she's a being from what she says is 'the hell that froze over' (because it sounds cool), in actuality it's probably something more like a frozen-over planet with some level of aquatic life under the ice.

at a base level, she's kinda like... if a slimegirl was a crab? like, she's not made out of slime it's still Meat Stuff but it's definitely amorphous and should usually be contained within a thick carapace on the exterior (so when fully shelled, lookin like some kinda scary lookin pointy bone demon). she claims to have lost hers or that it hasn't grown in yet or some such (hence she only has the horn covering)

anyways. her inside meat being amorphous = limited shapeshifting ability, so she somehow ended up on Earth and is posing as a humanoid and having a ton of fun eating and smoking and breaking stuff. but she still fuckin' hates the sun and heat

other fun facts:

loves meat, milk, sweet stuff, clothes, sleeping, swimming, video james (bad at them), money

hates spicy stuff, hot weather, working, people as stubborn as she is, waiting

i'm torn on when her birthday should be. officially it's technically 5/21, but 3/3 would be cute...

believes drinking milk will help grow her shell in

has a strong sixth sense due to having similar organic function to ampullae of lorenzini

durable. if you punch her it caves in like some monkey d luffy shit

[rizaposting]

have not been able to shake a weird little idea that I have no idea how to start or how to end where the premise is: ~5 years Post-CoS or maybe longer, Ed somehow manages to get blipped back into Amestris (Al also, but he got tossed somewhere else) and somehow contacts Mustang and they just end up sitting in a bar trying to figure out How The Hell This Is Possible What The Fuck. Mustang is older and more mellow and that kind of freaks Ed out, who wants the familiarity of bickering with him in this desperately weird situation. They're both kind of cagey and don't know what to say and neither of them are very forthcoming about their lives.

Eventually they end up going back to Roy's home and he's got a nice house in the suburbs with a weird gravel driveway and there's a single porchlight left on, and Roy says "Oh, by the way, keep your voice down my wife is asleep" and Edward is like "who the fuck would agree to marry you lmfao" And Roy is just. Mmh. Because he's really not looking forward to Edward finding out he married Fucking Lieutenant Hawkeye.

The issue is that there's a clear story there, how did the Elrics get there? Where is Al, what is he doing? Etc. But all I want to focus on is, like... Ed as an observer to domestic royai moments LOL. Rummaging through all their pictures and trinkets. Sleepy Riza shuffling around in a fluffy robe in the mornings like a grandma. Roy trying to take up gardening and being in an ongoing war with the rabbits that are eating the shit out of their raised beds. The closed door that Ed is NOT allowed to look into that's totally not a half-built nursery that puts some of their suspicious behavior into perspective. Do you see my issue? I could tell a cool story but my brain is slop

[stem-sister-scuffle]

STEM SISTER SCUFFLE: ROUND 3 MASHUP 2

Ms. Frizzle (The Magic School Bus) vs Winry Rockbell (Full Metal Alchemist)

Ms. Frizzle is a Science Teacher!

Winry Rockbell is an Automail Mechanic!

Why you should vote for each contestant:

Ms. Frizzle:

"*gestures at entire magic school bus series*"

"Embodies the true spirit of scientific discovery: barely-contained chaos."

"She is very knowledgeable about a wide variety of sciences, and uses that knowledge to further the educations of many people. Teachers deserve the world; they do so much for so little in return. (shout out to Mrs. Goates)"

"She loves science and loves teaching kids about science. I love her. Idk I saw she only had one submission and that made me sad so now im here submitting her"

"She is an icon and has cool earrings"

"SHE'S SO COOL!!! She's so smart and so fun and genuinely just an icon. ALSO she has a little lizard on her shoulder. I saw an ask abt the submissions for Ms. Frizzle and the sender was the only person who submitted her.. I couldn't let this go. ALSO one of my professors irl called herself the irl Frizzle and she's a doctor of biology so make of that what you will"

Winry Rockbell:

"The best automail mechanic in the whole of Amestris: need I say more? She’s also the only person who can really get Edward Elric to listen / scare him"

"She's super smart and is crazy about mechanics, but she's also so kind and compassionate! She helped deliver a baby, she cares really deeply for her friends and family! She truly rocks!"

"i’m a biomedical engineer so she is the best women in stem"

"she’s extremely skilled and dedicated to her craft, her work is very high quality (she’s also the personal mechanic for one of the protagonists) and she has a dedication to improving the lives of the people around her in any way she can (and she has so much autism swag about automail, it’s a joy to watch). i love her your honour"

"She's so good and so fun and she's trying her best. She makes sure the prosthetics work and they're super plot important!!!!!"

"She can build and repair robot limbs AND attach them to human nerves"

"She’s only 15 and is repairing magic-infused heavy machinery for fun"

"Spunky, kind, and smart as hell... one of the shounen manga girls of all time."

"At age fifteen she could build a whole metal arm in 3 days (pulling all nighters)! She geeks out over the work of other prosthetics engineers and earned herself an apprenticeship where the shop's costumers began to prefer her after only a few months! She's kind but takes no shit and narratively symbolizes the goodness of humanity. also she read medical textbooks as a kid (her parents were both doctors) and was able to apply that knowledge for successful impromptu midwifery years later!"

"She is practically a child engineering Genius! Designs and makes prosthetics. She takes her work very seriously and geeks out over other people's designs. She is such a beautifully written strong female character that holds her own in a fandom full of amazing strong female characters and a great role model. She's Hella cute"

"She is considered a prodigy in her field, and is known as the “Automail Otaku” because of her unending interest of any machines and tools in the building and repairing of automail. She is incredibly smart, sincere, and passionate. She works hard for what she wants, is full of optimism despite what she has suffered, and is very loyal to her friends."

"built a fully functioning prosthetic arm for her friend when she was TWELVE basically by herself and has been his regular mechanic since. also heavily dabbles in the medical side as well as the mechanical side (for example: she successfully delivered a baby single-handedly at fifteen having only ever read about the subject before). she is so skrunkly she’s an icon a legend and she is the moment"

"Listen any girl who can master mechanical engineering, electrical engineering, and biology in order to build prosthetic limbs by the age of 12 is Impressive. She’s the one that got me onto an engineering career path I’m very biased"

[thelaughtercafe]

Edward and Alphonse finding out you like being tickled

Tea Type: Rose Boba

Potential Triggers: Invasion of privacy in Ed's, please don't actually steal/read anyone's diary unless they're explicitly cool with it, even if you're partners! Just so this is clear both Edward and Alphonse are of age here and been in a relationship for a while! Also this is post '03, not Brotherhood!

Pairing: Edward/F! Reader, Alphonse/F! Reader

Length: 983

Summary: N/A

Edward Elric:

“W-What?!”

Edward could hardly believe what he’d just read, eyes wide with disbelief. 

It was meant to be a joke; a harmless prank as you banged frantically on the door, a whine on your lips.

“Ed I swear if you’re touching something you shouldn’t be-”

He quickly schooled his expression save for the barely there glint of mischief in his eyes and closed your diary before making himself comfortable on your bed. 

He raised an uncaring eyebrow as you burst in and glared at him. 

“What’s the big panic? You’re such a drama queen; I just wanted to mess with you!”

He pouted at you from your bed, all casual innocence; and when you stormed over with a pout of your own and leaned over him-

BAM!

That’s when he pounced, lunging forward and flipping you so you were underneath him before ruthlessly digging into your sides. 

His pout melted into a shit-eating grin as you burst out into laughter and tried to weakly swat him off. 

It didn’t do anything of course. 

“I cannot believe you kept this from me! You look so fuckin cute like this! It’s a crime I didn’t know about it till now!" 

Your eyes widened comically wide and you squealed; voice going high-pitched as you responded. Of course, he chose to go for one of your worst spots at that moment to make your flustered state all the more obvious. 

He could admit it. He took pleasure in your suffering. 

"You know!?! A-Aren’t you weirded out?!”

He snickered at that, his smirk making you lightheaded with embarrassment. 

“Oh darling. C'mon now. I’ve always liked making you into a mess…now? I just have an excuse to do it as much as I want. Why don’t you beg me for more like a good girl hm?”

“You’re so mhehehehehean!!”

“And you wouldn’t have it any other way. Now, less talking more begging or I bring out some tools~”

He stuck his tongue out playfully and you couldn’t deny the fullness of your heart despite the blush in your cheeks if you tried. 

Alphonse Elric:

Alphonse and you play fighting was nothing uncommon. 

He was eager to use his new fully functioning body and see what it was capable of and had no qualms about messing with you to reach that goal. 

The fights were always short but you seemed to enjoy them anyway even though you always ended up underneath him panting and red faced. 

His typical reward for winning was tickling you. Your laughter was just so damn infectious and after not hearing it all throughout his journey with Ed, he was all too ready to make up for lost time. 

He can be dense at the best of times so he didn’t realize you liked it till you told him, some time into your relationship.  

"Wah?! Really?”

Turns bright red. 

He suddenly grins wide, even if his blush is still obvious and hops in place a little. 

All excited exuberance.

Asks a bunch of rapidfire questions like he’s a giddy kid again. 

“How long have you known? Do you have a favorite spot? Aw I can’t believe I didn’t know about this earlier!!" 

His pout made you giggle. 

"I’ve known for a good while, not really, and I didn’t want to freak you out. You’re taking this better than I thought you would, honestly. When I asked Ed how he thought you’d take a sex conversation he seemed sure you’d freak. He tried to get what I was talking about specifically to tell you with him there but I told him it was private.”

Your giggles turned to laughter. 

“He yelled at me for "corrupting you”. Clearly he had nothing to worry about.“

Alphonse grumbled and blushed darker at the information. 

"Stupid brother…I’m not a kid anymore! Of course I know about sex stuff. Just cause I’m not a playboy like him-”

“I am not a playboy!”

It was your turn to blush apparently as Ed’s voice shouted from the other side of the door, making you storm over to open it and glare at him properly.

“You were eavesdropping!? You little-”

“I needed to make sure you weren’t taking advantage of-”

“He can take care of himself first off, and you have to know I’d never do that! Honestly, Ed, sometimes your protectiveness goes too far.”

You sighed and rubbed your temples bur before you could continue bantering Alphonse got between both of you, frowning disapprovingly at his brother.

“Not cool Ed! I don’t eavesdrop on you and Winry and you shouldn’t do it with us! She told you she wanted it to be private. I’m not a little kid anymore, I can make my own decisions!”

“Al…”

The two stared each other down a moment before Ed cracked and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. 

“Fine, fine.”

He raised his eyes to yours. 

“I’m sorry. I just…worry. I’m not used to having someone else to share the burden of looking out for him. Truce?”

He held out his hand and you quickly shook it, a faint smile on your lips. 

“Truce. Oh and Ed?”

You squeezed his hand tight enough to make him hiss in pain. 

“Forget what you heard. If that gets out I’m coming for you.”

You released his hand and he looked faintly amused a moment as his eyes flashed, and a cheeky grin twitched onto his lips. 

“You can’t even say the word, can you?”

“Ugh, get out! Stupid brat-!”

You shoved him out as he laughed the whole way, and you turned to look up at Al as he hovered over you while you leaned against the door. 

“Thanks for standing up for us.”

Sincerity shone in your eyes as you leaned up and kissed him, arms circling around his neck. As you both headed towards the bed, you pulled back to giggle against his lips as he squeezed your sides, mischief shining in his eyes. 

“I’m ready to try it out if you are~”

[manias-wordcount]

Edward Elric x Reader but the reader is ishvalan(like scar)and how they just navigate the world as a couple ig💕

No Matter How Hard You Try (Edward Elric x Reader)

𝗔/𝗡: 𝗶 𝗺𝗮𝘆 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗴𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗻 𝗮 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗯𝗶𝘁 𝘁𝗼𝗼 𝗲𝘅𝗰𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗲 𝘄𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗼𝗼𝗽𝘀 (𝗶𝗺 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘀𝗼𝗿𝗿𝘆 𝗶 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗯𝗼𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮 𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗲 𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘀𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗱 𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗲𝘀 𝗶𝘁). 𝗮𝗹𝘀𝗼 𝘅𝗲𝗻𝗼𝗽𝗵𝗼𝗯𝗶𝗮/𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗶𝘀𝗺/𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗶𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻(𝗼𝗿 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝘅𝗮𝗰𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘃𝗮𝗹𝗮𝗻𝘀 𝗳𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗼𝗼𝗽𝘀 𝗶 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗽𝗼𝗼𝗿 𝘃𝗼𝗰𝗮𝗯𝘂𝗹𝗮𝗿𝘆) 𝗶𝘀 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗰𝘂𝘀𝘀𝗲𝗱 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗻𝘁

𝙒𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚? ⇒ 𝙈𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩

𝙟𝙤𝙞𝙣 𝙢𝙮 𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙘𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙫𝙚𝙧?

𝙗𝙪𝙮 𝙢𝙚 𝙖 𝙘𝙤𝙛𝙛𝙚𝙚?

You always thought that being in his arms was the safest place in the world. Especially with eyes like yours.

  He was never afraid to hold you tight and hold you close. Never afraid to be the one to grab your hand and to pull you to his side- even to the annoyance of his boss and all the other officers above him. His touch could be the perfect blend of warm on a cold day and cold on a hot day. He’s strong and he’s smart and he’s kind to you. He protects you from the stares of eyes that wander too far. He defends you from the words that you never deserved to hear. He sees you for more than just the color of your eyes and the shade of your skin. So much more.

  And he’s all you could ever want. So you always felt like you could sleep the most soundly when he has you tucked into bed and curled up right beside him as you both slept. You always felt like you could smile more easily when he was there, escorting you from place to place- and no taking shit from no one who makes fun of the great Fullmetal Alchemist and his little girlfriend. 

  But right now, your feelings can’t help but change. In some ways, you still feel that being in his arms is the safest place in the world. But right now?

   You can’t help but feel like it’s the saddest place in the world too.

  “Ed…”

  This corner of the library is particularly quiet. It’s always been secluded from the occasional person dropping by for a quick read. That’s why the two of you like it so much. That’s why this spot makes you so happy. He could spend hours here. Combing over book after book while adding pages upon pages into his research journal. And you could spend hours here too. Sitting sideways on his lap and drifting in and out of sleep with your face in his neck. In between your naps, you feel his right hand slip just underneath your shirt, drawing small circles into your skin with metal fingers just barely covered by his gloves. In between the words he writes and the words he reads, you wrap your arms around his neck press kisses to his cheek, and bask in the butterflies that float around your stomach as he smiles back in response. Enjoying the company the two of you bring to each other. Enjoy the little moments of peace between the storms. 

  But sometimes you have to face the storm before you can go through it.

  “Ed,” You whisper again when you find that he’s too engrossed in his book to hear you. Just a low, low sound that barely drifts beyond where the two of you are seated. You make careful work not to be disruptive to him or anyone else who could be lurking around the two of you. But the more you sit here, the more you think and think and think. And as much as you tried not to dwell on it, you couldn’t help but let your mind slip. These hours together are long, but you enjoy them the best you can. But sometimes, even that’s not enough. “Edward.”

  At the sound of his full name being whispered into his ear, he twitches. The hand he has resting across your waist adjusts itself before grabbing a fistful of your shirt’s material and squeezing. It’s a playful touch. The type of PDA he’s not afraid to show off in front of everyone despite your growing embarrassment. But this time, you can’t focus on the flustered feeling and the heat growing in your cheeks. You can’t think about it all. 

  “Shh, I’m almost done for the day.” He tells you with a whisper, gently placing his pen down in his notebook as he finishes the sentence he was currently writing. For a second, his eyes slide over to your face as he turns and faces you. But the kind smile he was going to offer to you disappears within the second he notices the look on your face. “What’s wrong? Did you see something? Was someone there? Did someone scare you?”

  He fires off his questions at rapid speed, the concern now lacing his voice as his brows furrow and his eyes darken. The arm around your waist squeezes you to his chest just a little tighter than before. And while you’re more than appreciative of your boyfriend’s protectiveness towards you, you make sure to circle your arms around his shoulders and shake your head in response to all that he’s asking you. 

  “Are you sure?” He asks you, voice just louder than a whisper. His voice, despite the soft lilt it takes to be comforting for you, holds a well of seriousness that shows off just how concerned he is for your well-being. Still, you shake your head no again and try wiping off the apparently very evident frown on your face for his sake. Though instead of a reassuring smile, the look gets replaced with a pout that you just can’t seem to shake off, no matter how hard you try. Noticing your frustration, Ed's concern for you only grows. In an instant, he’s wrapping both arms around you and turning your body ever so slightly so you can look him directly in the eye as he talks to you. “Are you tired? Do you need Al to walk you home? I can go find him right now if you would like?”

  “No, Ed that’s not…” You start to say but then your voice stops. Almost as if it couldn’t bare the words you were about to say. Almost as if you hadn’t said it ten times before. Still, it doesn’t make things any easier. You take a deep breath, trying to collect your thoughts but nothing comes out. Nothing works. Nothing sounds right. Nothing helps. Nothing at all. But the hands resting on your sides are encouraging as they give you tiny squeeze after squeeze, urging you to use more of your words. You owe that to him, at the very least. You owe it to him to communicate and not mope around. Wishing and wishing things could be so much different than they are. “I…”

  And knowing that you’re getting exactly what you signed up for when you said yes to that first date the youngest State Alchemist ever asked you out on.

  “You’re leaving again, aren’t you Ed.”

  You aren’t supposed to know. You aren’t supposed to know a lot of things but your Ed’s and he doesn’t mind sharing with you despite the harsh words from all his comrades that see you as nothing but an enemy- present, past, and future. You aren’t supposed to know a lot of things, but judging from his reaction he really didn’t want you to know this one thing. At least not right now. 

  And you know this easily. You know this because the hands on your waist begin to squeeze. Harder than he usually squeezes. As if he doesn’t remember his own strength. Yet he still manages to stop all on his own. Right before the feeling of hurt starts to bubble up from the depths. But that’s the thing about Ed. He never tries to hurt you. 

  So instead, he loosens his grip. And he sighs. 

  “Al and I have a new lead on my research. But there’s another reason they want me out there. ” He mumbles, eyes avoiding yours. He keeps his response short like he doesn’t want prying ears to find out the exact truth behind his words. Like he doesn’t want your ears to find out the truth behind what’s left unsaid. The challenges that he’ll face. The dangers he’ll witness. And you hate it. “Recent orders, I’m sorry. I only found out today.”

  You shoot him a look as you let your arms fall from his shoulders to halfway down his arms. Now it’s your turn to sigh. “Ed-” You start to chastise him, but he’s quick to cut you off with something new.

  “Scar is going to be there.” He tells you. His tone is even but there’s a bite in those golden eyes of his. A snarl. You can see it even though he refuses to look you in the eyes. You can see it because you know him too well not to.“ And Mustang wants me gone by tomorrow morning.”

  You take a deep breath. And then another one. Ed is finally looking at you now. Reading your expressions as best as he can. And just like you know him too well, he knows exactly what frustration looks like upon your lips. But even the feeling of him reaching up and taking a strand of your pretty white hair and curling it around his finger like you’re the most precious thing in the world does little to stop the fears and ideas that fight for attention in your head.

  “Where are you going?” You ask quietly. The fear of knowing the type of situations his job puts him in has your throat going tight with worrying. But you don’t ever want something like fear to stop you from loving him. Because he never let it stop him too. “Maybe I could go to the station now and buy a ticket. I still have a bag packed from when you-”

  “You’re not going.” A flat-out rejection. Denial of the century. Ed’s books and research journals have long since been abandoned in favor of putting all his attention on you and telling you that you can’t come with him. No matter how much you want to. No matter how hard you try. “It’s too dangerous.”

  But you’re not the type to take it sitting down.

  “It’s not too dangerous, Ed. Scar wouldn’t hurt me You know he wouldn’t.” You respond back, facing your boyfriend straight on with a determined frown of your own. His lips are set in a straight line as you challenge him head-on. But the memories of the last time you were present when Scar was in town are evidence enough that you don’t have to worry about him, even if you aren’t the best fighter. Besides, you aren’t totally helpless. And you know you’ve been a great help to him and his brother along their journey more than they can count. “So you don’t have to leave me here like I’m just some-”

  “I’m not afraid of him hurting you.”

  His words bite in quick and hard and fast as he cuts you off. There’s a certain type of sternness in his voice. A sound that isn’t unfamiliar. But a sound you don’t love when it’s turned on to you. When you look into his eyes, they’re all set ablaze once more, his own sense of frustration settling in at your stubborn nature. But now his jaw is clenched and the grip on your waist and returning with full force. You’re glad it’s not the automail hand this time though. Not because you’re afraid of getting hurt. But because you’re afraid if he holds you with that hand hard enough, you really won’t be able to chase after him- no matter how hard you try.

    “I’m not afraid of him hurting you.” He tells you again, as his words didn’t have the effect he wanted them to have the first time around. But this body of his relaxes and he sighs for the umpteenth time today. His grip loosens, his shoulders slump, and he lets his head fall and fall and fall forward until suddenly there’s warm skin and silky, long blonde hair brushing up against your forehead. He closes his eyes and he breathes you in. Your arms circle his shoulders once more as you tug him a little closer and you breathe him in too. Your eyes closed and your mood has significantly calmed down before the next time you hear him speak. “I’m afraid of what others may do to you when they see that you’re Ishvalan too.” 

  Outwardly, you shiver at those words. But on the inside, you’re cowering at them. It’s a very real fear to have. One that is all too real, even. And you know, because you have it too. Because there are days when people are brave enough to cast judgment upon you because of the color of your eyes in front of Ed.

  So there must certainly be days when people will do more than just use your words without the Fullmetal Alchemist by your side.

  “I’m sorry, but that’s one risk I’m not willing to take. Not while I’m so far away from you.” He speaks again, but you’re holding him close and holding tight now because you’re already halfway toward forgiving already. Though that does little to stop him from turning his head and pressing his lips to your cheek over and over again. As if that will make things better. As if it will make your worries and your fears go away. “Major Armstrong was assigned to be your escort while I’m gone. He’ll take care of you. You’ll be okay.”

  But will he?

  “Ed…” You murmur softly. Those hands of his are keeping you rooted to his lap. Those hands of his are making you promise that you won’t do anything crazy or reckless while he’s not around. And those hands of his are running themselves up and down your sides as he wants to try to memorize the shape of your body against yours one more time. Warm on a cold day. Cold on a hot day. For good measure, he uses both. “I don’t want you to go…”

“I know, I know.” 

  But you don’t want to be in his arms unless you know he’ll be safe the moment he leaves yours too.

  “...I don’t want to leave you either.”

  However impossible that may be.

[lovinglynx]

"Edward Elric was kind of a little shit."

Have you ever met a 15 year old??

[szaliczek]

Sometimes all you need to be happy is a 2 meter tall unfinished Alphonse Elric in your garage and your bestie dressing up as Edward

Tw: a little vent

Recently one of my family members told me that my cosplay making abilities are shit. It stung, even though it's not the best (it's my second project this size).

So, if you'd like to write something nice or criticize me, please do! I need some encouragement on this guy real bad lately

This is me wearing him for the first time bahahaha