#effective the fact Gwen thought they could still talk after implies she still thought him reasonable and hints this was a show of care of n

[movedtodykedvonte]

I sometimes wonder if Miguel ever tried recreating that sense of family he had with Gabriella with Miles and Gwen...except Miles and Gwen only received that toxic parental side from him and not the healthier, wholesome part he had with Gabi because he's mentally unwell and grieving and punishing himself daily as penance.

This is a really good thought cause Gwen alludes to this in her rant at Miguel during the Go Home Machine sequence, “Maybe you weren’t hard enough on him!”. Miguel views his actions based on being Spider-Man not as being Miguel. Either way, he is acclimated to loss in grief in such a unique way that it just seems difficult for him to understand that others aren’t or don’t become susceptible to his alternative to grief/guilt.

It would be plausible that Miguel is sort of worried about gaining a connection with members of the society (especially the younger ones) as he’s lost a lot in his life (if his backstory is any similar to his comic + gabi) and the healthier side would undoubtedly led to a less formal work relationship and something that bleeds into what little life he has outside of Spider-Man as Miguel.

For all intents and purposes Miguel genuinely believes that he is being reasonably protective of Miles and Gwen by over-protecting the canon as he doesn’t want them to experience the pain of over-stepping cosmic and normal boundaries like he did along with dampening his emotional investments in them by being harsh. I mean, recently people have been pointing out he tears up when Miles tells him he can’t not save his dad.

His intentions and sentiments towards these kids are pure and based in altruism but his actions and executions of them are destructive if outright hostile.

[lilyclawthorne]

Keeping Up A-fear-ance's Thoughts

I finished writing this shortly after 3 am after watching the new episode like three times because I simply had too much energy about it and I have so many thoughts because I simply live for clawthornes and also I tried to break it up with more photos this time sorry not sorry if it's a lot ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

YOUNG EDA!! let me just say I am quite a fan of opening with a flashback like we've done here and the last episode

"we have never seen a curse like this before" Lilith you had shit luck picking out curses huh

"cut it out if we have to" goddamn Gwen let'a calm the fuck down a bit.

anyways we've only really seen young Eda as a wild and confident and happy little child so I appreciate seeing this side of her with the anxiety and fear she's feeling here. I love seeing what the curse stuff was like for her as a kid

Gwen: I raised a perfectly fine kid

Me: no you didn't look at her she's got anxiety

I'm guessing this is their backyard or just some woods behind their house?? wonder if the portal was placed there by another elder family member.

lmao I can't even begin to imagine what small Eda experiencing the human realm was like for the first time

Gwens giving me "I can't accept that my child is disabled/chronically ill/etc." here. y’know the kinda parent that'll put their kid through hell over something they probably will find a way to learn to live with (which Eda did do)

ok that's it I humbly request to know the story behind the fang now (also the noise she made when she put it in was freaking cute)

new dress! new boots! new dress! new boots!

..yikes that fridge is empty

"calm down the curse acts stronger when you're stressed" Eda do you know who you're talking to here

confirmation losing limbs is in fact a side effect of the curse!! (y'know since Eda originally said it just happens when you get older)

please I love these sisters they're so sweet and make me wanna go 🥺

"suddenly curious about my past" "always. always curious" Luz says exactly what we all think

witchlet?? sweet flea?? she's got pet names for them 🥺 (although idk how much I'd like to be referred to as any kind of flea sorry Lilith)

ok Gwen is very much not close to what I expected and I'm kinda grateful for that

she's more like super caring but still managed to royally fuck up which was my original head canon for clawthorne parents so uh that's cool. but literally, look at their body language, Eda's pissed, Lilith's sad and making herself small. she's clearly messed up with her parenting on both of them along the way.

"who knows what they put in those nasty concoctions?" mama clawthorne would be a fucking anti-vaxxer wouldn't she

ok I side with Eda here more than Luz and Lilith. just because Luz misses her mother, or Lilith hasn’t seen their mom in so long doesn’t mean Eda has to feel all grateful for the presence of Gwen, especially if the woman has caused her a lot of trouble over the years

I feel like the fact that its actually both Lilith and Gwendolyn have spent their whole lives dedicated to trying to find a cure could probably have held some kind of weight on Eda at some point. Even though she shouldn't feel guilty or responsible for that, I still feel like it's gotta suck knowing these people have spent so much time on something you know is likely never gonna happen, all for you.

Lilith 😞 her mother really just didn't pay attention to her all these years

hey if this guy does some next level healing magic then why isn't he more well-known, huh? why’d it take so long to come across him?? Gwen do you know what the fuck you're doing cause I think you don't

Lilith just because you're depressed about your mom doesn't mean you have to bring king down too 😠

SUPER irrelevant but is anyone else just bothered by the way Lilith is holding her spoon?? that doesn't seem like a comfortable way to hold a spoon. also is she left handed??

"knife season came early" EDA WHAT DOES THAT MEAN. is this a boiling isles things or is this a it’s common for people to throw knives at you thing

also I want to be surprised Eda fell for the apple blood signs but I am not 😔 

Luz please trust you're gut on this one and not mama clawthorne

ok now I need to know why the fridge was empty but they had 18 cartons of ice cream this is why you guys don't have food you're wasting it all on ice cream.

wow never thought I'd see the day hooty became the voice of reason

also, night market ice cream?? are they implying this ice cream is like, edibles of some sort?? Lilith does seem kinda high here ngl. idk man but at least she wants to stand up for herself so good for her.

PLEASE kings just offering her ice cream while she transforms

"first in a series" Gwen honey oh no. you've been duped. I think we can see where Lilith got her naïveté from huh.

Also, nice snatch Luz 😊

anyways love how this show is basically making fun of moms who refuse to give their kids proper medical treatment or listen to medical professionals here

EXCUSE ME why do we know Gwen's palisman's name before we know Lilith's?????

"I am a mother who'll do anything for her daughter" you're mom who's suffocating obsession with one daughter has left the other neglected and is currently causing her to turn into a full on beast ya dummy

Eda DOES have a right to be upset. it sucks that her own valid emotions that she should get to feel will cause her while body to betray her.

PLEASE I’M SO GLAD LILITH’S BEAST DESIGN LOOKS LIKE HER AND IS NOT THE THING FROM THE TRAILER THAT IS ACTUALLY IN EDA"S HEAD WHEN SHE’S TRANSFORMED

but also why is she SO massive?? also anyone concerned that this is her first transformation and the light glyph trick wouldn't even work??

Gwen look at what you've done, you've fostered feelings of inferiority in one daughter causing her to feel the need for sibling rivalry that the pure instincts of the raven beast cannot suppress no matter how much their sisterly relationship had improved.

HOW COULD YOUR OTHER DAUGHTER ALSO BEING CURSED BE A PART OF THE PROCESS GWEN??

"after Eda was cursed, I joined the beast keeping coven" woah woah WOAH. you're telling me you only joined because of trying to help Eda. that covens existed, before Eda got cursed, and you very much weren't a part of one. combine that with "some words for belos" she has and do I smell wild witch theory still plausible???

anyways at least mama clawthorne is getting some sense into her head here

Morton c'mon help a girl out, that's some dang good art too what the heck dude

ok fine mama clawthorne to the rescue

no pls not raven beast Lilith crying im crying now

Gwen: I raised a fine and self-sufficient child

Me: no you didn't look at her. she's got, SO MUCH.

GODDAMN THATS SOME POWER. ngl this only adds fuel to the fire in my head that there was some kinda reasoning these sisters were torn apart, that someone felt they'd be too powerful together (and they were probably right)

"I heard you but I couldn't stop myself, I couldn't do anything" may be just because she's not used to the curse but again part of me is concerned that because she couldn't pull herself out of it even a little bit like Eda did that there's something wrong there. but she also could've been stressed beyond reasonably calming herself down too.

ok but this is sweet

NOOO im so sad Lilith's leaving :( I literally cried ok

"you lived here?" fine OKAY king that was hilarious even if im sad about this

"reconnect with dad" excuse me where the fuck has this man been in the middle of all of this. curse shit is going DOWN and he's just chilling at home.

I am curious about people's thoughts regarding the whole Lilith regression thing and the fact that she's literally going to be living with her parents again. I feel like it could help nurture that inner child she's been reverting back to and help her out a LOT. but I could also be concerned about it feeding into the regression and making it worse?? idk and this show probably ain't getting that actually deep into psych anyways

"some day my hair is gonna be big enough to do that too" Luz I cannot wait for the day. also mood, I wish I could do that too.

alright who's holding the fucking pen for hooty we need a volunteer RIGHT NOW so we can remain in contact with Lulu

NOT THE ONLY HUMAN? my bets on the real azura rip never mind she said he

Titan’s Blood?? interesting. If the blood of the titan is around I wonder what that means regarding the titans existence, and how long its been since the titan fell.

AHH BABY LUZ PHOTO

ALSO WHO THE FUCK IS THAT?? They're really gonna spring that on us like this??? Camila's gotta notice somethings wrong right??? Unless any differences she just chalks up to the camp?? oh god :(

well, anyways lumity shippers come get yo juice next weekend

anyways im gonna need to add a NOT canon compliant tag on that one Gwendolyn fic I wrote because it definitely do not comply anymore

[hellzyeahwebwielingessays]

Did Peter love MJ more than Gwen in the 1970s?

I’ve debated with myself if Peter grew to love MJ more than Gwen in the 1970s Conway run or not. I maintain he did.

The arguments against this idea boil down to:

He’d dated Gwen for far longer than MJ by the end of the Conway run

These pages from ASM #149, featuring Gwen’s clone (the first of many)

As you can see Peter initially seems to be suggesting that he and Gwen might be able to work something out before she hushes him up. And of course he’s moved to tears by this.

Later he refers to Gwen as someone he needs but knows he shouldn’t be with.

So here is my attempt to lay things to rest.

I think Peter ultimately did come to love MJ more than Gwen in Conway’s initial run.

Let me dispense with the initial counterpoint first.

It is entirely possible for someone to fall in love and then fall in love with someone else even more within a shorter space of time. It depends upon the circumstances. It’s certainly not the case that if MJ died tomorrow Peter would be falling in love with someone within the consequent years or anything.

But the key difference is time and the depth of the connection.

With Gwen and Peter, we all know how ultimately not great they were for one another.

Peter himself might not have recognized this, and it didn’t mean he wasn’t in love with Gwen sincerely. But it was there nevertheless.

We should also consider the amount of time they spent together.

Peter met Gwen at the start of his college career in ASM #31. He graduated after a four year degree in ASM #185

Gwen died in ASM #121, and her clone showed up in ASM #144. This was stated to have been 2 years after Gwen’s death.

This means that ASM #31-121 and ASM #144-185 collectively must equate to 2 years. Whilst the former time period was longer than the latter it still meant that Peter knew Gwen for less than two years. Bear in mind, that’s not him dating her for less than 2 years or having serious feelings for her. It’s just the time between when they met and when she died. Initially they weren’t even friendly towards one another until ASM #39 and only gradually started hanging out in the same social circle a little while after that. It took yet more time for them to have their first date and yet longer to realise they were in love.

So really we aren’t talking about as massive a time period as it might seem initially. He had 2 years to get over her, which was much longer than the time they were together and in love. Admittedly though he and MJ weren’t together for most of those 2 years.

Their romance blossomed fairly naturally, by which I mean it wasn’t aided by any extenuating circumstances, not really anyway.

In contrast Gwen’s death was the catalyst for Peter and MJ’s romance. At a time when both were emotionally vulnerable (especially Peter) they forged a connection. A connection under these circumstances is extremely likely to be potent and from Peter’s POV MJ was in a sense saving his life. He says as much in ASM #137 and much later in Web #125

Saving his life is something Gwen definitely didn’t do and would endear Peter to MJ for sure.

And let’s be real here, MJ is simply a better match for Peter than Gwen was. Nostalgia goggles aside, Gwen wasn’t able to connect with Peter as thoroughly as MJ was and their romance had far more turbulence than Peter and MJ’s had in Conway’s run; not that it was turbulence free of course.

So Peter is with a woman who’s really been there for him when he was vulnerable, who’s saved  him (and for a guy who saves other people, that would mean a lot) and who’s a better match for him too.

In ASM #141, these factors lead him to question if anyone could replace Gwen in his heart.

Given how Conway was telling an extended mega-arc this isn’t a rhetorical question. The metatext of this moment is throwing the readers the question of whether Mary Jane could replace Gwen in both the narrative and in Peter’s heart.

ASM #142 develops this question further as Peter sees Gwen’s clone briefly in the crowd and runs after he believing her to be the real Gwen.

Those old feelings were still there. Peter still wanted  Gwen at that point.

When they shared their kiss in ASm #143 they realised they were in love with one another.

This was when Gwen’s clone showed up and Peter was in the middle of an emotional tug of war between his old feelings for Gwen and his new ones for MJ. This is first alluded to in ASm #145 when Gwen’s clone tearfully embraces Peter, imploring him to help her. However, his eyes lock with MJ’s, a look of concern shared between them.

The implication is clearly that Peter is torn. The dynamic has flipped because now it’s MJ he wants.

This is corroborated in ASM #146 when Gwen’s clone kisses Peter. She is treating the situation as though nothing has changed, that she and Peter are still in love. He doesn’t kiss her back though prompting her to ask if he still loves her. He doesn’t have an easy answer sending her into tears and him into frustration.

Peter straight up vocalizes his situation. He is no longer sure  if he’s in love with Gwen (9/10 if you ain’t sure you are in love, you ain’t) and this is specifically because of Mary Jane’s presence in his life. He elaborates that he should be rejoicing that miraculously the woman he’ll always love is back, and yet he feels like he wants to die.

In ASM #147 Peter learns that the living Gwen is just a clone. This realization combined with his pre-existing turmoil pushes Peter a wee bit over the deepend. His dialogue conveys that he’d prefer Gwen to have remained dead and in essence regards these clones as functionally the same. They aren’t the original Gwen but to him they are  Gwen.

Let’s put aside how his feelings for Gwen are taking him to an unhealthy place, which doesn’t help her case.

The art and dialogue convey Spidey admitting he loves Gwen and always will but when the image of Gwen approaches him he clearly wants her to get away. He doesn’t want  her there.

I will grant you, this moment might not specifically highlight that Peter is rejecting Gwen because of MJ. It might just be that he doesn’t want to relive losing her over and over. But within the grander narrative and the ‘question’ Conway set up it is at least food for thought in support of MJ.

In ASM #148 an exhausted and battle weary Peter is too out of it to really take in the presence of MJ on his door step. When he realises he’s shut the door on her he hastily reopens it and tries to reach her, but fails. Clearly he wanted to see and talk to her. When he hears the doorbell later he leaps out of the bath and excitedly opens it hoping it was MJ. Again, he is happy  at the prospect of seeing MJ, and yet seeing Gwen makes him sad.

Finally we come to ASM #149. Upon heading for his big showdown with the Jackal Peter has some very telling dialogue.

He wanted to see MJ alone. Gwen’s reappreance has confused him about what’s important to him.

But he isn’t confused anymore.

He knows who  is important to him now.

The context of the scene, the consequent issues and Peter’s actions on the top pages from ASM #149 make the truth abundantly clear.

MJ  is who is important to him, and he’s referring to her importance in contrast  to Gwen.

I.e. Mary Jane is more important  to him than Gwen is. This is Conway answering  the question he set up issues earlier.

The final pages (which I posted at the very top) hammer this point home yet further.

What’s noticeable about these pages is that, whilst Gwen’s clone distinguishes herself from the original, it’s not clear if Peter does. Out loud and internally his dialogue refers to the clone as ‘Gwen’ and later he even refers to the clone’s departure as ‘losing Gwen twice’. This confirms that from Peter’s POV he was treating Gwen’s clone as though she was the real thing. Later in Spec Annual 1988 Conway revisits Gwen’s clone and again confirms that Peter regards her as functionally the same as Gwen. It is only after a moment of deep realization that he comes to think otherwise.

So there is no denying things here. The resolution to Peter’s feelings in Conway’s initial 1970s run weren’t contingent upon Gwen being a clone. Peter was choosing MJ as more important over Gwen, clone or not. As his dialogue conveys, he wanted  her to go.

ASM #150 reaffirms this point by having Peter declare MJ as the one he cares for.

The one he cares for, even outside of the wider context, implies he cares for her above everyone else. So he cares/loves MJ more than Gwen!

Further food for thought is added by the fact that this realization then leads to him further realizing that he’s not  thinking about Gwen in his dying moments. There is no indecision in his mind, it’s MJ all the way.

I think I’ve proven my case but let’s shoot down some counterpoints anyway.

Why was Peter crying when Gwen left?

Because, as he said, it was painful to lose her again, even though it was what he wanted.

Contrary to what his dialogue in ASM #145 potentially implied, Peter was never out  of love with Gwen. His feelings were uncertain, he was confused and torn and needed to part the clouds within his mind and heart. It’s why as the arc progressed his dialogue gradually affirmed his love for Gwen. He head just grown to love MJ more.

Why did he say he and Gwen needed each other?

The real life answer is that Conway dropped the ball a little. Peter clearly doesn’t need Gwen as he was doing fine before he knew her and was able to go on successfully without her. And he was planning on living his life without her even though she was alive.

In a sense the word need was just a bad word choice. Had he said love it would’ve made more sense. ‘Need’ implies Peter and Gwen were a necessary presence in one another’s lives, but her presence was having a harmful effect upon Peter’s mental and emotional health. He recognized he was better before she reappeared and wanted  her to leave.

His dialogue about how they can need one another but still know they shouldn’t have  one another kind of highlights the poor word choice. If they now they shouldn’t have  one another that fundamentally goes against the idea that they need  each other now doesn’t it.

Basically, Peter wasn’t thinking clearly or had a tiny brainfart with his word choice.

Wasn’t Peter going to suggest they stay together before Gwen cut him off?

Technically we have no clue what he was going to say. But if we presumed that to be the case, this is still a highly emotional moment for Peter and he feels a certain sense of loyalty and duty to Gwen.

He wants to do the right thing because he’s all about responsibility. Gwen kind of all alone in the world so it’s possible he felt it was right for him to help her, maybe stay with her out of loyalty.

But more likely he was going to suggest she stick around and they remain friends or something. He had clearly made up his mind by that point and wanted MJ.

Couldn’t this arc just prove Peter grew to love MJ equally, not more than Gwen?Couldn’t Peter have just wanted to move on from Gwen, not that he loved MJ more?

No.

Because again, he regarded the clone as the bona fide article and was working on accepting her return.

He could have been with her had he wanted. She could have been the one he cared for. She could have been the person important to him. But he wanted her gone. He wanted MJ even though he did still love Gwen.

So it wasn’t just about moving on. He was handed a miracle, but it was a miracle he didn’t want because he loved another and wanted them instead.

[forestwater87]

A moment to chat about “The Butterfinger Effect” (obv spoilers for S4e17)

Wow, so a lot of people fucking haaaaaated this episode. And since I’m addicted to That Discourse, I had to say something because I think they’re super wrong. (And this isn’t me just being a total Camp Camp fangirl here; like, the pee episode was bad. That was bad tv and bad for all the senses. There have been mediocre and even shitty episodes of this show; this just wasn’t one of them.)

There are a couple different points of criticism aimed at this episode, and while there’s one I’d like to take a deep dive into in particular I might as well take some shots at the others real fast:

The moral was too obvious: god, you guys whine all day and night that you wanna see Max show character growth and whenever he displays it you hate how it’s done. This show has never been one for subtlety. I mean, the climate change ep? This is how the show works; it’s part of its twisted-Saturday-morning-cartoons charm, it’s the most efficient way to get a point across in a short runtime, and it was the set up for the joke at the end of the episode.

It didn’t advance the plot: bitch what plot are you talking about???

Not enough dad//vid: listen I’ve made my thoughts about the fandom’s idea of dad//vid incredibly clear at this point, so let’s just:

The most common argument, though, is that it’s all so very “unrealistic” and “out of character.”

Considering the show’s concept of “realistic” involves squirrel armies (hey, another mediocre episode! See, I can call them when I see them) and a universe-destroying space octopus, I’m not sure how to rebut that without another Bianca del Rio gif. So, the out-of-character accusation. 

Listen, characterization is hard as balls. Everyone fucks it up sometimes, and not every characterization in every episode is gonna work for you. 

But you know who nailed it this time? Eddy Goddamn Rivas, the writer for this episode, that’s who.

In fact, I’d argue that the entire point of the episode is that it’s not Space/Race Kid’s new interest that caused the majority of the changes, or some sort of mystical “butterfly/finger effect,” but Nurf’s attempt to put things back to “normal.” He caused the thing he was trying to prevent -- which happens to dovetail perfectly with the moral of accepting change and not letting it freak you out.

This episode is brilliant, and plays with the canon characterizations of all our campers while staying true to them, and I’m gonna show you how.

Under a cut, because not everyone has time for that shit. But first, a juicy preview of the sexy discourse to come:

Space Kid

This one is the easiest to defend, because Space Kid is just . . . Race Kid. Aside from maybe having an idea that he’s cooler than he used to believe he was -- which makes sense, because why do people buy fancy sports cars except that they think it makes them look cool? -- we’ve seen his tendency to latch onto an interest and go 110%. 

Reasonable, hilarious, and adorable. I actually don’t think anyone has any problem with Race Kid, so this is a quickie. 

As for why he dropped it so fast: I mean, hasn’t everyone gotten really into something before deciding it wasn’t as fun as an old hyperfixation? I’ve been coming back to the Camp Camp well since 2016 because it’s just so much fun.

Nurf

Nurf is the one I think people are sleeping on. All the time, always, but especially in this episode. The summary hints that Max is the one unable to handle the idea of change -- something this entire season has been working towards, and I literally just realized change has been a thematic thread throughout several of the episodes and that’s really cool -- but it’s actually Nurf who can’t stand the thought of things being different.

And, in trying to prevent the “butterfinger effect,” he sets it in motion. The irony is delicious, and his head in a fishbowl makes me laugh every goddamn time.

(Also, “A battle of wits is not my strong suit” was just hysterical. Nurf is full of great lines and y’all need to stop ignoring what a comedic goldmine this kid is.)

Preston

Oh, I’m sorry, are we shocked that Preston would jump at the chance to be admired by people, even if it means doing something he doesn’t particularly enjoy?

Were we all in comas during the episode this very season that was literally only about this exact thing?

As to why he’d pick football: he’s a theater kid addicted to the corniest, most cliche tropes. When he got a taste of power by bullying Nurf -- which was also totally in character, because honestly, Preston is not a very nice kid -- of course he went to the thing that in every 80s teen movie meant “cool bully who’s super popular”: the sports jock.

Add to that getting positive recognition from Campbell -- who we’ll get to -- and this swap is totally in-character, and entirely kicked off by the power rush he got from finally getting to be the one who bullies instead of being bullied. 

Nurf created his own worst nightmare by being afraid of change. This episode is fucking brilliant.

Harrison

To nobody’s surprise, Harrison is a sadist who thinks he’s hot shit.

He’s emotionally traumatized Neil to win an argument, he’s made Max vomit up, just, like, so many things and shown zero remorse, and got an unflappable sense of self-worth that skates right off the edge into total egotism.

These are the things we love about him. (And yes, obviously his arrogance comes from a deep well of insecurity, but that only exacerbates why he’d absolutely refuse to help Nurf, because it gives him a chance to be better than someone.)

As for why he’d choose to model himself after goth!Max . . . 

Honestly, this one doesn’t entirely make sense to me. He’s never shown any particular interest in Max. The only thing I can assume is that . . . well, actually Max was right, and at least in Harrison’s eyes, he is at the top of the social hierarchy. And he got there by giving zero fucks about what anyone thinks of him.

Which is what Harrison did, by refusing to help Nurf. We come full circle!

(WAIT: When Max asks why he’s acting like . . . you know, him, Harrison’s response is, “Why? It’s not making you insecure, is it?” While we could take this as “I’m coming for your shtick,” it could also imply that Max’s general Maxyness makes Harrison feel insecure about who he is. Which explains why, as soon as he’s offered a chance to emulate someone who makes him feel insecure, he chooses Max.)

Ered

Nerris and Ered have established themselves as friends, and she at least has expressed a token interest in playing DnD before. She’s listened to Nerris talk about this stuff enough to repeat it at times -- albeit incorrectly -- and so, when there’s “nothing better to do,” she tries something her friend is super into and finds it really fun and embraces it.

I can attest that DnD totally turns you into a massive, shameless nerd. It’s just that awesome.

Plus, she’s too cool to give a shit if people think she’s being nerdy, so of course she’s not embarrassed about being seen dressed like a Viking; in “Ered Loses Her Cool,” she had that moment of growth where she decided that her coolness comes from her happily choosing to be herself. 

Also, she gets to carry an axe around. So like, extra cool points for that.

Nerris

Nerris is gonna grow up to be a band geek, and she’ll especially enjoy the theatricality of marching around in parades while dressed like a Christmas Nutcracker. It’s like being a real-life bard.

This is the only one that really has a “supernatural” level to its change, except maybe the counselors (yes, I’ve come around on Neil; I’ll defend him at the end). While everyone else can be explained by psychological and in-character reasons, I have no idea what caused her to suddenly have this whole getup. I’d chalk it down to her seeing everyone else trying something new and being interested in upping her LARPing game, except she explicitly says she doesn’t know where it came from.

It’s one of the few that doesn’t make perfect sense, but I don’t really mind it because it’s such a top-tier episode otherwise.

Dolph

This is another one with questionable backing in the rest of the canon. However, I think it works less on a characterization basis than on an archetypical one. 

Hear me out: how many artists actually make it professionally? And how many of them end up falling back on something solid and lucrative and artistically unfulfilling to pay the bills? Some people are of course lucky enough to land their dream job, and others are lucky enough to find something close enough to that dream job to make money while still doing something creative and adjacent to their interests (becoming an art teacher, for example).

But in Hollywood, at least, the idea is that you’re either a professional artist who Makes It, a starving artist who’s sacrificing for their dream, or a total corporate sellout who abandons their soul for the sake of profit. A child, especially one with a father so unsupportive of his artistic interests, would only have the Hollywood idea of success to fall back on, which means if Dolph was tying to think of a way to “grow up” and stop wasting his time on being an artist, of course he’d jump straight into the most famously corrupt, artistically soulless type of job possible.

The problem here, of course, is that I don’t know what triggered it; like Nerris, I don’t really see a clear line from motivation to new hobby. However, it works really well at poking fun of the “artist to sellout” pipeline portrayed in popular media, so I certainly can’t be mad at it.

Also, look at these credit scores:

David’s score is either astoundingly good -- 825 out of 850 -- or astoundingly bad -- 325 out of 850 -- depending on what that first number is. Gwen’s credit is pretty bad, which isn’t surprising considering she’s working at Camp Campbell, but I’m still proud of her for being either the second- or third-highest person at the camp.

None of the campers should have credit, so these numbers are just goofy, but I’m as shocked by Nikki’s “exceptional” credit as I am by Nurf’s “literally not on the chart by 298 numbers” rating. Assuming Dolph made at least the campers’ scores up, and we know he’s pretty good friends with Nikki, I assume he gave her a higher score because he likes her, Max’s is trash because their relationship is rocky at best, and Nurf’s is just petty and spiteful because he bullies Dolph, and I just love it. 

(I assume Mr. Campbell’s credit is in negative numbers, and QM doesn’t exist on any official records.)

Counselors & Campbell

Campbell, I’m going to argue, makes sense.

This? Not so much.

I have no idea what Gwen’s talking about -- “I need her showing. We all agreed to it”???? -- and literally none of this makes sense in any understanding of characterization or anything, but my counterpoint would be:

Look how cute Gwen looks dressed up like David.

“Mumble, grumble, aliens!” and something about Mormons in David’s cheery voice adds 5 years to my life.

David’s floof is now beard.

David is wearing plaid.

QM. Just . . . QM.

Did I mention that Gwen looks so fucking good here? I swoon. So hot. Babe. Step on me, mommy.

Anyway. Campbell. 

He’s not what you’d call . . . nurturing, by any means, so at first this weird dad!swap is totally out of left field. However, he has proven himself to be . . . well, not a great caretaker, but someone who does put in the effort when he has to, and is surprisingly good at dealing with the kiddos when forced.

He’s also proven himself to be remarkably introspective, starting back in Season 3. He does to an extent feel bad about what he’s done, and to varying extents wants to make amends for it. So when he starts talking about legacy, and what a man leaves behind -- 

-- I can’t say I’d be all that surprised if he stumbled upon Preston trying to be “cool” with sports camp and decided (probably with the help of whatever supernatural strangeness came over the other counselors) that he wants to have a better impact on this camp than a bunch of broken-down equipment, a pile of debts, and a “son” who’s disappointed in him. 

Listen, what I’m trying to say is that I will die defending my Trash Grandpa and there’s nothing you can do to stop me. There’s good in him!!!! I CAN SEE IT!!!!!!!!!!

On a less “Campbell is my dad” note, as a rather stereotypical Manly Man(TM), he’d be best served helping some weedy little brat become more traditionally masculine. i’m saying Campbell was great at football in high school and is in part reliving his glory days, okay?

Nikki

Oh, come on. Nikki’s always shown an interest in science, and particularly in the mayhem it causes. When Neil is out of commission, and she sees that everyone else is doing major hobby swaps -- including Ered, who I believe she still sees as her idol -- why wouldn’t she want to join in on the fun in the most destructive way possible?

The show didn’t say she was a good scientist, after all. 

Neil

Remember when I said I couldn’t defend Neil? WELL SURPRISE BITCHES, TURNS OUT I CAN! 

(I didn’t realize it until halfway through writing this post, to be fair.)

But think about it: the boy does not respond well to his mind being freaked. We have observed this.

This is not a good reaction to an unsolvable logical problem.

I’m just saying, there’s not a huge difference between these pictures. Neil doesn’t do well when his brain is overloaded with things he doesn’t understand, and everyone around him turning into different people -- which is how it must look from their perspective, even if I can sit here and explain it in ways that make sense at least to me -- broke the poor boy’s brain.

He’s a very fragile ecosystem, our little Neil. You must protect him from thinking too many thinks and getting overheated.

So . . . yeah. This episode is rad, way more of it makes sense in terms of the characters’ motivations than people are giving it credit for, and the ones that don’t make a ton of sense are at least funny and clever enough to be overlooked, at least in this broad’s humble opinion.

[safitheartist]

A closer look at the circus freaks and Ben 10 (2017)'s pretty amazing world building. Also potential Kevin forshadowing?

Okay, stay with me here for a second because I have very shocking news to you guys. Season 2 of Ben 10 so far was really good.

No seriously, it feels like moa *actually* lead us on the entirety of season 1 and now they actually reached early SU level of subtle world building. It's insane.

For example, lets look at three characters all other incarnations of Ben 10 so far has been glossing over for the most part.

Acid Breath, Fright Wig and Thumbnail.

Because this time. They come with lore! And lore that leaves some pretty dark implications might I add.

So lets dig in guys, because there is a whole can of worms to devoure here.

Now lets have some context, the original circus freak trio were introduced to us as Zambozo's three henchmen in the original series and have been treated as a trio eversince, they never had much characterization out side of the fact that they are vilans and their only motivation seems to be money or other forms of profit.

Most of them time, if they aren't under somebody else's command Acid Breath seems to take the leader role.

The things interesting about them often were the fights they would have against Ben, due to their really unique powers. However, on the personality front there really wasn't much to work with.

Another thing to note is that they were introduced to us as adults.

Now the reboot, is taking a pretty different approach.

It's humanizing them.

First, we aren't even introduced to them alongside Zambozo, they don't even make a appearance in Zambozo's debut episode.

And they only get introduced as a trio after Fright Wig already made her first appearance where we learn that she apparently has encountered Ben on several occasions, that and later context lets me believe that the trio probably does their solo thing until Zambozo would need them. Luring them in with false promises.

It's also then that they establish that at least Fright Wig is significantly younger then her original incarnation. Something that striked me as odd and slightly insulting at the beginning but now, with the newly established context, makes a lot of sense really.

Now Acid Breath's and Thumbnail's introductions don't establish much other then their return as a trio unit.

It's not until season 2 that the big bombs regarding their characters are droped.

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR SEASON 2 HERE GUYS!!!!!

In a episode where Zambozo tricks people with a convoluted hypnothis scheme involving a fake voting campaign done as a distraction so the trio can rob a bank we get something I honestly never expected for these three. Genuine characterization.

We find out in a conversation Ben overhears between these three that Fright Wig is really into science, apparently aiming to get new equipment with her pay. Establishing her as the brains of the trio and most likely to take on the strategist role.

Acid Breath comments that he wants to get mouth water 'for the ladies'. Establishing him as a lot more inmature then his original self and the disgnated goofball of the group. However later interactions also imply he still is the one who is in the leader position...my guess is because he's the oldest and has been with Zambozo for the longest time. It's a pretty big depature from his OG self which always seemed to be the most bitter and no nonsense kind of person. And that has it's reason as the episode establishs later.

Thumbnail doesn't talk, as per usual, but we get a glimpse of his personality as he imagines himself having a spa day with his cut. Establishing him as a rather sensitive person who just wants to enjoy himself a bit. It's again, somewhat different from his original self which honestly never had any personality outside of being the brawls of the group.

This seems minor but it is a very effective way to establish them as people outside of their vilan live. And it also serves as something the other serieses again never did.

Establishing them as friends.

They take interest in eachother. Want to know the other's opinion. Have playful arguments that don't come off as threatening at all. Again. It's simplistic but very effective to make them seem more real. It even translates into their fight scenes. In OG Ben 10 and the sequels the trio, while established as a team, never actually acted as such (if I recall right). They always acted as three individuals who attack Ben and the others together but never actually as a team.

The reboot has them leaping off of Thumbnail, throw eachother around and attack as a actual team unit. Similar to a circus act (and the scenes have some very nice camera angles too might I add. The animation is still meh but they use a lot of techniques to conceal that fact and keep the action dynamic).

Now the thing to keep in mind here is that non of their established desires are expensive, Fright Wig's probably being the most expensive, and even then she seem to only want some new beakers. Ben even comments on it, saying he almost feels sorry for them.

We then find out that Zambozo never paid them before, only having promised he would do so at a later date. Clearly having no intentions to actually follow through with that. Which actually ties in very nicely in the overall narrative of the episode.

Ben then makes them realize that Zambozo is playing them, as Fourarms might I add, either implying Ben himself has diplomatic talents or that Fourarms' dna donator had them (Achi, once you read this, you are very welcome).

The trio react very differently to that realization. Thumbnail gets furious, realizing he will never get his spa day. Fright Wig seems to see Ben's point and points out how Zambozo doesn't seem to care about anything but his own gain.

Now Acid Breath....is something alright.

At first he seemed hesitant to abandoning Zambozo until Fright Wig points out that Zambozo doesn't care about them...which prompts a series of flashbacks that clue us in to some really dark aspects of their relationship.

We see a slightly younger Acid Breath, with hair and teeth. Remarking how he thinks he should go to the doctor as his teeth seem too be starting to rot while Zambozo is uncaring and not at all bothered as he is too busy admiring his profit...which Acid Breath probably colected for him. This repeats a few times with his condition worsening over a seemingly pretty short period of time. At first I thought his mutation was only kicking in now, but what is more likely is that using his powers is causing serious health problems for him. At first I was confused why he was so gullible in the first place and didn't just go to a doctor himself (maybe stealing some money to go to a check up) until his last line....

He remarks, as his hair and teeth are falling out,

"Seriously, I'm only 16!"

.........ouch.

Now that puts his situation into a completely different context doesn't it? Not only does that mean Zambozo was employing children without paying them (again Fright Wig is also younger and I think it's safe to assume that Thumbnail is as well) essentially exploiting them. He also failed one of them as he basically was destroying his body for him, probably scared and confused about the situation and searching for comfort from the only parental figure in his live at the time.

Now that's just fucking depressing. It's pretty fair to assume that Acid breath probably is 16-17 still in the series, going off of context clues and his overall behavior. I think Thumbnail is around the same age if not a bit younger and Fright Wig probably is the youngest, young enough to pose as Gwen's friend, so I peg her as anywhere between 12-15 (probably looks younger then she actually is). That's just speculation on my part based on their behavior around eachother though.

After the flashback Acid Breath decides that they should ditch the clown (thank fuck.) aluding to him being the unofficial leader of the group as it's his decision that is the final.

They sent Zambozo a angry message consisting of emojis (again, heavily implying that they are teens....look, the show isn't perfect okay.) followed by them sending a picture with a 'we quit' sign.

In the end we get teased that we didn't see the last of them. Clearly establishing them as a separate entity from Zambozo, most likely for good as we get a glimps of them enjoying themselves on a vacation somewhere. Showing them still as a close unit.

Now this. This is some very, very dense world building stuffed into one episode and conveyed with very little exposition really. We get the most important context clues via plot development and the little exposition there was felt quiet natural.

It raises a lot of questions. Like 'how did these three get into this situation?' 'Where are their parents?' 'Why is no one trying to help them?' And most importantly, 'What is the follow up to this going to be?'.

Like, think about it. The episode went out of it's way to separate them from Zambozo while also making them more relateable. They wouldn't do that if it's not important. So what narrative purpose does it have?

Now I have a theory what they might be going for here. You see. This entire set up feels familiar to a very iconic character we had in the original show.

A kid with powers who was mistreated and exploited due to them. Somebody who got on the wrong course more due to the nature of his environment rather then his own wrong doings.

Boom. Now isn't that a interesting concept?

Do I think they will make Kevin one of the circus freaks? Eh. No that would be a stretch. I mean sure, it could happen, but we first have to wait and see how they are changing his character.

Do I think they are at least on a thematic basis forshadowing Kevin's introduction? Yes. Absolutely. And there are other clues as well.

Vilgax, on two occasions, has been teaming up with other vilans. Animo and the weather bots. With Animo he almost immediately betrayed him, leading Animo to team up with Ben temporarily and...well that's a bit too much of a spoiler but lets just say.....something very interesting happens that also ties into the thems of Kevin's OG character. The weather bots again, go against Vilgax, leaving him saying 'never again' which probably is a joke since from a narrative stand point there is no way this will be his last team up. Rule of three anyone?

Moa has been exploring a lot of themes that they never got to explore in length in their original show. Stuff Alien Force then took a dump on mostly (I don't fucking care what you guys say. On a writing stand point Alien Force fucking sucked!) They have been putting a lot of emphasis on magic in their show, establishing it as a clear and unmistakeable aspect of their universe. However another aspect Alien Force screwed up was the concept of mutants until Omniverse retconed that again.

In OG it was heavily implied that Kevin's mutation caused people to discriminate againt him. Show casing him having clear abandonment issues and triggers. However they never went into detail with these concepts. Causing....Alien Force to assassinate that entire concept (again. Alien Force was the worst Ben 10 incarnation and you can fucking fight me!!!). So for them to actually forshadow Kevin and making his entire storyline a lot more significant makes a lot of sense.

Anyway. I am actually enjoying the show so far and am very curious as to where stuff is going there. I hope the circus freaks are getting even more development and maybe even a redemption, who knows? I also hope they are keeping the 'found family' vibe they have alive. I'm a sucker for that stuff.

[canyouhearthechurchbellsringing]

#47: Back to the Present

03/12/17

So that’s basically it. After seeing Ali, I moved in with her and her cousin Jae about an hour away from Wellington. I got settled in and started looking for work. Eventually I got a part-time gig as a corner store attendant. That started to take up more of my time and the entries fell to the back of my mind as weeks turned into months.

Ali and I had a long talk when I first got there about the investigation and everything I’d learned. Her insistence that I stop the entries was a big factor in me discontinuing updates via Twitter and Tumblr. The risks of trying to get beyond the doorway again, the stress of constantly obsessing over these written records, all of it was venomous to my health. She helped me see that. As someone who lived with her own demons and someone who helped me identify mine, I deferred to her wisdom in dealing with the situation.

But I’m back, obviously. I had to sneak around her, use her laptop when I was home and she wasn’t. It started on a quiet afternoon when I was home alone, surfing the web. Darek called out to me. He uttered a single word: Figment. It’s the term that came from entries I’d read; it’s Darek’s little jab at everyone who called him a “Figment of my imagination”. I did my best to ignore it, but the next day, while at work, he said a new word: Twitter. He wanted me to check the account he made for me. We played this little game for a bit, him intermittently repeating those two words and me trying not to lose it in public places. He has this impeccable ability to make me feel perfectly insane. His little one-word gambit had the effect on me he desired. I spent so long after hearing him whisper Twitter with naught for a response that even I started to convince myself the voice had been all imagined and that the real Darek had not said a thing.

He was back for real, though, and likely had never left. He was just waiting for me to build up a few blankets of safety around me before striking again. Obviously I caved. That is when I discovered the images:

https://twitter.com/CYHTCBR/status/840705714679087104/photo/1

https://twitter.com/CYHTCBR/status/836023998542721024/photo/1

https://twitter.com/CYHTCBR/status/825487213555281920/photo/1

https://twitter.com/CYHTCBR/status/820495754401906689/photo/1

https://twitter.com/CYHTCBR/status/820495726211895297/photo/1

https://twitter.com/CYHTCBR/status/808843714496004098/photo/1

He started laughing when I inspected the images. I noticed the letters in all of them, as well as the fraction ¼ in the profile picture. Something about this gives off a very alien vibe. I’m beginning to think Darek is not the only entity with access to my twitter. I can’t explain exactly why; it is more of a gut feeling than anything. The images with text as a form of communication has always been utilized by Zanark and Chameleon. I don’t doubt that Darek made the account for me himself, but he might not be the only one with access to it.

At any rate, after the bouts of laughter, Darek finally said something more than a single word. I still remember it word for word: Try your old Tumblr password again. You can’t stay still any longer.

I don’t need to tell you, reading this on my blog, that it worked on the first try. Have you ever felt like you were being used and manipulated but lacked the courage or resources to resist? That is how getting into the blog made me feel. I knew it was what he wanted but it was also the only reasonable remedy to that darkness in the back of my head.

I started reviewing and editing the past five entries when I could use Ali’s laptop privately. It is a bitch and a half keeping this secret from her but I’ve managed so far. In addition to new entries I have done some editing and rereading on entries up to #20 or so in the archives. If you scroll back you can see some of the leads I gathered. There appears to be some circumstantial evidence linking Chameleon to Mammoth and Zanark to Ben. I also have definite evidence in conjunction with #43 that Anna and Gwen spoke the truth when they implied I had been there before. Entry #15 referenced the same shrine detailed in that log.

Something else became apparent after revisiting entry #13 and the dream entries early on that gave me a frightening thought. Darek and Ali are linked in some ways. This should be more obvious given they were dating on Facebook and how, in #46, Ali gives my brain the nudge it needed to grant Darek autonomy. If Kendra and Darek are connected this strongly, how much danger does that put me and Ali in for being this physically close at all times? I don’t know if I’ve driven home the frightening levels of intelligence the two possess. They wanted this. It is not even a theory in my mind; it is a fact. Something big is coming. Kendra and Darek moved us along a set path to end us up here, to be able to collude in person. My hands are shaking as I type this.

I think I need to talk to Ali. I think we might already be in the endgame of whatever this all is. I make no update promises but I will try my damn hardest to keep this blog consistently updating for as long as possible.