#eloise - solid june

[retvenkos]

is anyone particularly opinionated about the bridgerton characters (perhaps also a ~star sign~ enthusiast) and want to take a stab at the birth months of all the bridgerton siblings? because i’m 90% sure that they don’t have canon birth months and for some reason i find this important.

[mysticalhearth]

G

A Gentleman's Guide to Love and Murder - Broadway - November 24, 2013 (Lanelle's master) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Jefferson Mays (The D'Ysquith Family), Bryce Pinkham (Monty Navarro), Lisa O'Hare (Sibella Hallward), Lauren Worsham (Phoebe D'Ysquith), Jane Carr (Miss Marietta Shingle), Joanna Glushak (Lady Eugenia D'Ysquith and others), Eddie Korbich (Magistrate/Actor/Mr. Gorby), Jeff Kready (Tom Copley/Newsboy/Actor/Guard), Jennifer Smith (Tour Guide/Newsboy), Catherine Walker (Miss Evangeline Barley and others), Price Waldman (Barber / Detective) A Gentleman's Guide to Love and Murder - Broadway - January 18, 2015 (Matinee) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Jefferson Mays (The D'Ysquith Family), Bryce Pinkham (Monty Navarro), Lisa O'Hare (Sibella Hallward), Catherine Walker (Phoebe D'Ysquith), Barbara Marineau (Miss Marietta Shingle), Joanna Glushak (Lady Eugenia D'Ysquith and others), Eddie Korbich (Magistrate/Actor/Mr. Gorby), Jeff Kready (Tom Copley/Newsboy/Actor/Guard), Jennifer Smith (Tour Guide/Newsboy), Price Waldman (Chief Inspector Pinckney/Newsboy/Actor) NOTES: Bryce's last show before his return in July. A Gentleman's Guide to Love and Murder - First National Tour - September 29, 2015 (Preview) (SunsetBlvd79's master) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: John Rapson (The D'Ysquith Family), Kevin Massey (Monty Navarro), Kristen Beth Williams (Sibella Hallward), Adrienne Eller (Phoebe D'Ysquith), Mary VanArsdel (Miss Marietta Shingle), Kristen Mengelkoch (Lady Eugenia D'Ysquith and others), Christopher Behmke (Magistrate/Actor/Mr. Gorby), Matt Leisy (Tom Copley/Newsboy/Actor/Guard), Megan Loomis (Tour Guide/Newsboy), Ben Roseberry (Chief Inspector Pinckney/Newsboy/Actor), Lesley McKinnell (Miss Evangeline Barley and others) NOTES: Beautiful capture of the tour which launched in Chicago. There's tiny bits of washout when the camera is in wideshot due to the spotlights of the stage. Terrific cast and a wonderful tour of this production! A Gentleman's Guide to Love and Murder - First National Tour - April 24, 2016 (SJ Bernly's master) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: John Rapson (The D'Ysquith Family), Kevin Massey (Monty Navarro), Kristen Beth Williams (Sibella Hallward), Adrienne Eller (Phoebe D'Ysquith), Mary VanArsdel (Miss Marietta Shingle), Megan Loomis (u/s Lady Eugenia D'Ysquith and others), Christopher Behmke (Magistrate/Actor/Mr. Gorby), Matt Leisy (Tom Copley/Newsboy/Actor/Guard), Ben Roseberry (Chief Inspector Pinckney/Newsboy/Actor), Lesley McKinnell (Miss Evangeline Barley and others) NOTES: A great capture of the tour. The cast is solid, and the audience is energetic. There are no blackouts, no obstruction, and no washout. It’s filmed in 16:9, with a mix of wides, mediums, and close-ups. The sound is excellent. Includes curtain call, John and Kevin’s BC/EFA speech, and playbill scans. A+ Gentlemen Prefer Blondes - Encores! - May 12, 2012 FORMAT:  MP4 (HD) CAST: Megan Hilty (Lorelei Lee), Rachel York (Dorothy Shaw), Aaron Lazar (Henry Spofford), Steven Boyer (Pierre/Louis Lemanteur), Brennan Brown (Steward/Mr. Robert Lemanteur/Gus Esmond Sr.), Stephen Buntrock (Josephus Gage), Simon Jones (Sir Francis Beekman), Deborah Rush (Mrs. Ella Spofford), Sandra Shipley (Lady Phyllis Beekman), Megan Sikora (Gloria Stark), Clarke Thorell (Gus Esmond Jr.) NOTES: Filmed from the back of the balcony. Many heads appear in the frame to start, then when the filmer gets his bearings, the video improves greatly. There are a few times (mostly at the beginning) when the filmer replaces some poor video moments with still shots. These still shots are less than 2 or 3 minutes of the entire show. Overall, a great video, and Megan Hilty is amazing Ghost: The Musical - Berlin - June, 2018 (Rumpel's master) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Nikolas Heiber (u/s Sam Wheat), Willemijn Verkaik (Molly Jensen), Marion Campbell (Oda Mae Brown), Andreas Bongard (Carl Bruner), Mischa Kiek (Willie Lopez), Nicolas Christahl (Subway Ghost), Klaus Seiffert (Hospital Ghost), Chasity Crisp (Clara), Denise Lucie Aquino (Louise) NOTES: Very Limited trades 3:1 Ghost: The Musical - Broadway - July 28, 2012 (SunsetBlvd79's master) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Richard Fleeshman (Sam Wheat), Caissie Levy (Molly Jensen), Da'Vine Joy Randolph (Oda Mae Brown), Bryce Pinkham (Carl Bruner), Michael Bladerrama (Willie Lopez), Tyler McGee (Subway Ghost) NOTES: Great HD capture of the show toward the end of the run. This is a great capture compared the previous one from March, with the changes that were made from the previews and with the original Oda Mae Brown. Despite what the reviews said, this is one show I thoroughly enjoyed and wish it had a better life on Broadway as it deserved! A- Recording with mostly zooms and a few wide shots. Great views of the effects. A Google Drive link is floating around that contains the wrong VOBs for Act 1-3 and Act 2-2; make sure you get everything! Ghost: The Musical - Hamburg - January 13, 2019 (Closing Night) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Riccardo Greco (Sam Wheat), Roberta Valentini (Molly Jensen), Marion Campbell (Oda Mae Brown), John Vooijs (Carl Bruner), Mischa Kiek (Willie Lopez), Marius Bingel (Subway Ghost), Alex Bellinkx (Hospital Ghost), Enny de Alba (Clara), Tamara Wörner (Louise) NOTES: Poor picture Quality, no zoom but captures all action and great sound Ghost: The Musical - Hamburg - January, 2019 FORMAT:  MP4 (HD) CAST: Riccardo Greco (Sam Wheat), Roberta Valentini (Molly Jensen), Marion Campbell (Oda Mae Brown), John Vooijs (Carl Bruner), Mischa Kiek (Willie Lopez), Marius Bingel (Subway Ghost), Alex Bellinkx (Hospital Ghost), Enny de Alba (Clara), Tamara Wörner (Louise) NOTES: Filmed from first row. Great capture of the full show. Ghost: The Musical - London Workshop - February 13, 2010 FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Oliver Tompsett (Sam Wheat), Natalie Mendoza (Molly Jensen), Sharon D Clarke (Oda Mae Brown) NOTES: Proshot, stand and sing performance. Ghost: The Musical - US First National Tour - January 12, 2014 (SunsetBlvd79's master) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Steven Grant Douglas (Sam Wheat), Katie Postotnik (Molly Jensen), Carla R Stewart (Oda Mae Brown), Robby Haltiwanger (Carl Bruner) Ghost: The Musical - West End - October 4, 2012 FORMAT:  MP4 (HD) CAST: Mark Evans (Sam Wheat), Siobhan Dillon (Molly Jensen), Sharon D Clarke (Oda Mae Brown), Andrew Langtree (Carl Bruner), Ivan de Freitas (Willie Lopez), Scott Maurice (Subway Ghost) Der Glöckner von Notre Dame - Berlin - 1999 FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Drew Sarich (Quasimodo), Ruby Rosales (Esmeralda), Norbert Lamla (Frollo), André Bauer (Phoebus), Chris Murray (Clopin), Andreas Gergen (The Archdeacon) Der Glöckner von Notre Dame - Berlin - August 14, 1999 FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Drew Sarich (Quasimodo), Ruby Rosales (u/s Esmeralda), Norbert Lamla (Frollo), André Bauer (u/s Phoebus), Chris Murray (Clopin) Godspell - Brazilian CEFTEM Production - September 4, 2015 (Papa Rose 2015's master) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Bruno Fraga (Jesus), Oscar Fabião (John/Judas), Bernardo Dugin, Carol Botelho, Gabi Porto, Giovana Rangel, João Telles, Laura Zennet, Lyv Ziese, Vinícius Teixeira NOTES: Excellent video of this marvelous production. Some heads at the bottom of the screen when it isn't zoomed in, but they only block the actors' feet. Gone With The Wind (Martin) - Palais Des Sports De Paris - 2003 FORMAT:  MKV (HD) CAST: Laura Presgurvic, Vincent Niclo, Sandra Léane, Dominique Magloire, Cyril Niccolaï NOTES: ProShot Grease - 8th UK Tour - October, 2019 (hitmewithyourbethshot's master) FORMAT:  MTS CAST: Will Haswell (u/s Danny Zuko), Martha Kirby (Sandy Dumbrowski), Louis Grant (Kenickie), Rhianne-Louise Mccaulsky (Betty Rizzo), Darren Bennett (Vince Fontaine), Peter Andre (Teen Angel), Jordan Abey (Doody), Ryan Anderson (Roger), Damian Buhagiar (Sonny Latierri), Eloise Davies (Frenchy), Natalie Woods (Jan), Tara Sweeting (Marty), Kevin O'Dwyer (u/s Johnny Casino) NOTES: Shot from the right mezzanine. Has some great closeups, mediums and wide shots. Some heads can obstruct at times, bu don't take away from the action. Audience is really loud and kinda badly behaved. Grease - Grease: Live (FOX Special) - January 31, 2016 (Pro-Shot's master) FORMAT:  MP4 (SD) CAST: Aaron Tveit (Danny Zuko), Julianne Hough (Sandy Dumbrowski), Carlos PenaVega (Kenickie), Vanessa Hudgens (Betty Rizzo), Jordan Fisher (Doody), Carly Rae Jepsen (Frenchy), Kether Donohue (Jan), Noah Robbins (Eugene Florczyk), Elle McLemore (Patty Simcox) NOTES: TV Special aired on FOX on Jan 31 2016 Grease - Manila, Philippines - August 15, 1995 FORMAT:  VOB (no smalls) (SD) CAST: Lea Salonga (Sandy Dumbrowski) NOTES: Quality loss Grease - Second Broadway Revival - July 28, 2007 (Preview) FORMAT:  VOB (no smalls) (SD) CAST: Max Crumm (Danny Zuko), Laura Osnes (Sandy Dumbrowski), Matthew Saldivar (Kenickie), Jenny Powers (Betty Rizzo), Stephen Buntrock (Teen Angel), Ryan Patrick Binder (Doody), Daniel Everidge (Roger), Jose Restrepo (Sonny Latierri), Kirsten Wyatt (Frenchy), Lindsay Mendez (Jan), Robyn Hurder (Marty), Allison Fischer (Patty Simcox) NOTES: Good picture and great sound with nice closeups throughout with a head in the way only once or twice for a few moments. Grey Gardens - Off-Broadway - April 30, 2006 (Closing Night) FORMAT:  MKV (SD) CAST: Christine Ebersole ("Little" Edie Beale / Young Edith Bouvier Beale), Mary Louise Wilson (Edith Bouvier Beale), Sara Gettelfinger (Young "Little" Edie Beale), Matt Cavenaugh (Joseph Patrick Kennedy Jr. / Jerry), John McMartin (J.V. Major Bouvier/Norman Vincent Beale), Bob Stillman (George Gould Strong), Michael Potts (Brooks Sr. / Brooks Jr.), Sarah Hyland (Jacqueline Bouvier), Audrey Twitchell (Young Lee Bouvier) The Grinning Man - West End - March 12, 2018 (Highlights) FORMAT:  MP4 (HD) CAST: Louis Maskell (Grinpayne), Julian Bleach (Barkilphedro), Sean Kingsley (Ursus), Sanne Den Besten (Dea), Amanda Wilkin (Josiana), Ewan Black (Trelaw/Osric), Mark Anderson (Dirry-Moir), James Alexander-Taylor (Mojo), Julie Atherton (Queen Angelica), Sophia Mackay (Mother/Quake), Jim Kitson (King Clarence) NOTES: 1920x1080 YouTube rip. Highlights, filmed at an angle from the second row with some obstructions throughout. Highlights consist of: Act 1, Labyrinth, A World Of Feeling, Only A Clown, Curtain Call. Groundhog Day - Broadway - March 16, 2017 (Preview) (NYCG8R's master) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Andy Karl (Phil Connors), Barrett Doss (Rita Hanson), Rebecca Faulkenberry (Nancy), John Sanders (Ned Ryerson), Raymond J Lee (Ralph), Andrew Call (Gus), Josh Lamon (Buster), Gerard Canonico (Fred), Heather Ayers (Mrs. Lancaster), William Parry (Jenson), Michael Fatica (Chubby Man), Travis Waldschmidt (Jeff), Joseph Medeiros (Deputy), Taylor Iman Jones (Lady Storm Chaser), Rheaume Crenshaw (Doris), Sean Montgomery (Sheriff), Jenna Rubaii (Joelle), Tari Kelly (Piano Teacher), Vishal Vaidya (Larry), Katy Geraghty (Debbie) NOTES: This is the first preview where the set broke down after about 15 minutes and the rest of the show was performed "concert style". All announcements (both over the speakers and onstage with the director/cast) are included in the video. In Act 2 Overture, The music stops for a second and then restarts. During the mid finale scene which is before when Phil runs around town doing “errands”, Matthew Warchus comes out and informs everyone that they will skip scenes due to the tech issue and just go to the scene of the song where Phil and Rita have their dance and from there.  

Groundhog Day - Broadway - March 20, 2017 (Preview) (NYCG8R's master) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Andy Karl (Phil Connors), Barrett Doss (Rita Hanson), Rebecca Faulkenberry (Nancy), John Sanders (Ned Ryerson), Raymond J Lee (Ralph), Andrew Call (Gus), Josh Lamon (Buster), Gerard Canonico (Fred), Heather Ayers (Mrs. Lancaster), William Parry (Jenson), Michael Fatica (Chubby Man), Travis Waldschmidt (Jeff), Joseph Medeiros (Deputy), Taylor Iman Jones (Lady Storm Chaser), Rheaume Crenshaw (Doris), Sean Montgomery (Sheriff), Jenna Rubaii (Joelle), Tari Kelly (Piano Teacher), Vishal Vaidya (Larry), Katy Geraghty (Debbie) NOTES: Better capture of the fully working performance than from the first preview vid. Nicely filmed in HD with clear picture and sound; complete show; great video

 Groundhog Day - Broadway - April 1, 2017 (Preview) (SunsetBlvd79's master) FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Andy Karl (Phil Connors), Barrett Doss (Rita Hanson), Rebecca Faulkenberry (Nancy), John Sanders (Ned Ryerson), Raymond J Lee (Ralph), Andrew Call (Gus), Josh Lamon (Buster), Gerard Canonico (Fred), Heather Ayers (Mrs. Lancaster), William Parry (Jenson), Michael Fatica (Chubby Man), Travis Waldschmidt (Jeff), Joseph Medeiros (Deputy), Taylor Iman Jones (Lady Storm Chaser), Rheaume Crenshaw (Doris), Sean Montgomery (Sheriff), Jenna Rubaii (Joelle), Tari Kelly (Piano Teacher), Vishal Vaidya (Larry), Katy Geraghty (Debbie) NOTES: Excellent HD capture of the new musical based on the movie. Such an amazing set and Andy gives a terrific performance. The set malfunctioned once and they had to pause and restart the song. Guys and Dolls - Fourth Broadway Revival - March 18, 1992 FORMAT:  VOB (with smalls) (SD) CAST: Nathan Lane (Nathan Detroit), Faith Prince (Miss Adelaide), Peter Gallagher (Sky Masterson), Josie de Guzman (Sarah Brown) Guys and Dolls - North Shore Music Theatre - October-November, 2012 (Pro-Shot's master) FORMAT:  MP4 (HD) CAST: Jonathan Hammond (Nathan Detroit), Mylinda Hull (Miss Adelaide), Kevin Vortmann (Sky Masterson), Kelly McCormick (Sarah Brown), Wayne W Pretlow (Nicely-Nicely Johnson), Jamie Ross (Arvide Abernathy), Ben Roseberry (Benny Southstreet), Jessica Sheridan (General Matilda B. Cartwright) Gypsy - West End Revival - 2015 (Pro-Shot's master) FORMAT:  MP4 (HD) CAST: Imelda Staunton (Rose), Peter Davison (Herbie), Lara Pulver (Louise), Gemma Sutton (June), Dan Burton (Tulsa), Julie Legrand (Electra), Anita Louise Combe (Tessie Tura), Louise Gold (Mazeppa), Billy Hartman (Uncle Jocko), Scarlet Roche (Baby June), Lara Wollington (Baby Louise), Patrick Romer (Pop) NOTES: Note from Blvd-on-Sunset: Two versions exist. One is broadcast by the BBC, has the logo watermark at the top left corner and is being traded at 540p. The other is released by Universal Studios in 1080p on BluRay and can be found on Amazon Prime Video (UK only) Check with traders which version they own.

[dweemeister]

Funny Face (1957)

In stories that evoke Pygmalion, I almost always find that I prefer the subject of the Pygmalion-like makeover as they were before the makeover occurred. Greta Garbo in Ninotchka (1938) is far more interesting as a frumpy Soviet agent than a converted, jovial Westerner; so too for Audrey Hepburn’s Eliza Doolittle in My Fair Lady (1964) as she turns from flower-selling guttersnipe to mistakenly being identified as distantly-related to Hungarian royalty. So it probably should be no surprise that I preferred Audrey Hepburn, seven years before My Fair Lady, before her transformation in Stanley Donen’s Funny Face. Funny Face is based on an unproduced musical by screenwriter Leonard Gershe and borrows its title and some of the songs from a 1927 George and Ira Gershwin musical of the same name. However, Donen’s Funny Face has a completely different plot, with only four songs from the Gershwin musical included. Nonsensical and foolish as it might seem in love, fashion, and happiness, Funny Face is a stylish musical without many peers.

In New York City, Maggie Prescott (Kay Thompson) is the editor of Quality – a fashion magazine. Maggie confides in her staffers and photographer Dick Avery (Fred Astaire) in a directional change for Quality. With Dick’s advice, Maggie begins looking for a model that can embody, “character, spirit, and intelligence.” Maggie and Dick will find Jo Stockton (Hepburn), a soft-spoken bookstore employee versed in modern philosophy, especially in Emile Flostre’s (Michel Auclair) “empathicalism”, as their unwitting model for the next cover of Quality. Jo – who disdains the fashion industry – longs to travel to Paris to meet Professor Flostre, and (after some convincing by Dick) accepts a modeling opportunity in Paris just to realize that dream. While in Paris, Jo, Dick, and Maggie find themselves in a variety of shenanigans that are appropriate for a musical romantic comedy.

Movie musicals that are not sung through demand that the actors involved provide robust performances and that they can carry a tune unlike Russell Crowe or Clint Eastwood (yes, Clint Eastwood once sang in a movie). With Hepburn, Astaire, and Thompson, those baseline standards are exceeded. Hepburn is the weakest singer of the three central actors (unlike in My Fair Lady, her singing here is entirely in her voice), but she – twenty-seven years old upon Funny Face’s initial release date – always embodied glamor and elegance. Even though less fashionable roles like in The Nun’s Story (1959) and Wait Until Dark (1967) were on the horizon, this is her first lead role in which she doesn’t play a sort of princess or socialite. Yet that, “character, spirit, and intelligence” irrespective of life station shines through in her performance before and after her character becomes a Quality model. Having loved Fred Astaire’s movies during her childhood, she leaped at the chance to work with him. Astaire, being the perfectionist he always was, put Hepburn at ease instantly, and that joy in their acting, dancing, and singing together radiates from the confines of the screen.

Despite the age difference between Astaire and Hepburn (thirty years; not the most sizable gap in an early career where Hepburn was often paired up with much older men – your tolerance will certainly vary), Astaire maintains a charm that he never lost when starring opposite so many actresses. His character of Dick expresses said charm when noting how much he loves Jo’s “Funny Face”. Gershe’s screenplay is aware of how Astaire best operates as an actor – keep it light, keep dialogue simple and concise within the bounds of the characters’ personalities – and allows the actor to succeed. Yet the film’s greatest delight is Kay Thompson as Maggie. Before the devil wore Prada, Kay Thompson urged her coworkers to, “Think pink!” It is through Thompson – better known as a composer an author of the Eloise children’s book series than as an actress – that the film funnels much of its soft-punching satire towards the shallowness of the high fashion world. Thompson is up for the challenge, nailing her humor like a master handyperson.

Thompson is gifted with a damned powerful set of pipes, as evidenced in the opening “Think Pink!” number (music by Roger Edens, lyrics by Gershe). “Think Pink!” – with its abstract art direction by Hal Pereira, George W. Davis, Sam Comer, and Ray Moyer in addition to Ray June’s cinematography and Frank Bracht’s editing – might be dismissed by those unfamiliar with the habits of musical movies of Old Hollywood, but the surrealism involved is among the most stunning in Stanley Donen’s filmography. More than most genres, musicals lend themselves to some degree of surrealism – if you’re suspending your disbelief for minutes at a time as characters are singing about things spontaneously, That surrealism is less apparent in the preexisting songs that appear in Funny Face (those who have listened to enough of the Gershwin brothers’ songs will recognize some of these titles): “He Loves and She Loves”, “How Long Has This Been Going On?” (an excellent showcase of Hepburn’s solid singing voice), and “’S Wonderful” (serving as the finale).

Along with “Think Pink!”, the second notable original song involves all three central actors as they say, “Bonjour, Paris!” (music by Edens, lyrics by Gershe) In just over five minutes, the viewers are treated to a musical montage of 1950s Paris as Hepburn, Astaire, and Thompson sightsee as much of the city as they can soon after touching down at Orly Airport (Charles de Gaulle Airport would not be opened until 1974) – each of their characters, taking separate taxis because it appears that Quality has money to burn, claim that they are too fatigued for sightseeing, but actually just want to have some alone time before settling down to business. It is not a song I would recommend for viewers attempting to suppress a rampant wanderlust, nor does it build character. It is purely a showboating musical number interested in displaying the beauty of the city and establishing setting. With less accomplished performers and handled by a less talented director, editor, and team of songwriters (overlapping lyrics while the three take Eiffel Tower elevator relieves the song of any semblance of monotony), “Bonjour, Paris!” would otherwise be superfluous padding. Instead, it is an entertaining romp through the City of Light, with infectious smiles melting away the characters’ anxieties and worries if just for a few minutes.

Away from the onscreen glow of the lead actors, Funny Face is supported by Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer (MGM) figures, specifically those working under producer-lyricist Arthur Freed (whose musical credits are jaw-dropping, but include, among numerous other works, 1951′s An American in Paris, 1952′s Singin’ in the Rain, and 1953′s The Band Wagon). In the days of old Hollywood Studio System, Paramount – which produced Funny Face – was known for historical epics, not its musicals. Musicals were the specialty of MGM, and it was Freed himself who purchased the rights to produce the film initially. Freed wanted Hepburn to feature, but Paramount was not about to loan its brightest star anytime soon. Thus, Freed allowed his friend, composer Roger Edens to transfer the production to Paramount. Among the MGM contractees working on this Paramount production included:

Kay Thompson

Stanley Donen (director; 1949′s On the Town, Singin’ in the Rain)

Ray June (cinematographer; 1936′s The Great Ziegfeld) 

Adolph Deutsch (musical director; The Band Wagon, 1954′s Seven Brides for Seven Brothers)

Conrad Salinger (arranger; 1944′s Meet Me in St. Louis, 1950′s Annie Get Your Gun)

Eugene Loring (choreographer; 1945′s Ziegfeld Follies)

The newly independent Fred Astaire had just been released by his contract from MGM, but owed Paramount a movie. As is self-evident, Funny Face had no shortage of musical expertise working behind the camera. And for an era in Hollywood where en masse loans of contractees never happened, this temporary exporting of talent was remarkable. After its release, Hollywood insiders mockingly labeled Funny Face as Paramount’s first MGM musical.

But that MGM talent did not extend to the costume design, which included Paramount’s legendary Edith Head – who, in a fifty-four-year career, still holds the record for Academy Awards for Best Costume Design (eight wins from a record thirty-five nominations). Head would be joined by French fashion designer Hubert de Givenchy for Funny Face. Where the latter handled Audrey Hepburn’s impeccable wardrobe (de Givenchy was also Hepburn’s personal fashion designer), Head designed costumes for all other cast members and extras. The costumes in Funny Face are an explosion of Technicolor – realizing, to the fullest extent, the incredible range of aesthetics, atmosphere, moods, and invention that the Technicolor dyeing process (within widescreen VistaVision) could allow.

As is the case with musicals, the non-musical writing and themes involved are suspect. Romantic and enjoyable though it is, Audrey Hepburn’s transformation from bookish clerk rejecting the superficiality of the fashion world to professional model is not terribly convincing. Elements of New York City-based Jo flicker when she is in Paris, yet are largely – not entirely – extinguished by the film’s ending. Though rooted in feminine concerns and viewpoints, Funny Face is anything but a thoughtful piece of feminism. But that is offset by the fact that Funny Face’s satirical targets include anyone appearing on-screen: fashion executives and their subordinates, photographers seeking the perfect shot, bookish women, pretentious philosophers that make sense to a handful of the film’s characters, but never to the audience.

Funny Face is an experience brimming with amusement, glee. With Fred Astaire midway through his career and Audrey Hepburn near the beginning of hers, the film benefits from their mutual adoration of the other – putting the other actors, and the audience, in a state of dreamy enchantment, perhaps dreaming up of an unannounced vacation as these true movie stars walk the streets of Paris.

My rating: 9/10

^ Based on my personal imdb rating. My interpretation of that ratings system can be found here.

[kartiavelino]

Why we still can’t ‘fuhgeddabout’ ‘The Sopranos’ 20 years later

On Jan. 10, 1999, a little-publicized drama collection referred to as “The Sopranos” premiered on HBO, chronicling the home {and professional} lifetime of a ruthless North Jersey mob boss dwelling in suburbia along with his spouse and two teenage children — and seeing a shrink for his anxiousness. Its giant ensemble solid, together with James Gandolfini as titular mob boss Tony Soprano and Edie Falco as his spouse, Carmela, was largely unknown — as was collection creator David Chase, whose TV résumé included “The Rockford Recordsdata,” “I’ll Fly Away” and “Northern Publicity.” “The Sopranos” modified the panorama of cable tv and gained a slew of Emmys (together with three apiece for Gandolfini and Falco) throughout its six-season run. It ended with an ambiguous, WTF? cut-to-black collection finale in June 2007 — panicking 12 million viewers who thought their cable crapped out and leaving Tony Soprano’s destiny eternally open to interpretation. I spoke to a number of of “The Sopranos” solid members, who shared their ideas on their patriarch, Gandolfini, who died all of the sudden in Italy in June 2013 on the age of 51; their favourite episodes; and the groundbreaking collection general because it turns 20. How It Modified Their Lives Edie Falco: It’s such as you wish to be a race-car driver and the very first thing they hand you is a Lamborghini. That’s what [“The Sopranos”] felt prefer to me. It stays a really particular chapter in my life with super emotional reverberations, still. My household saved attempting to inform me [how good the show was] and I advised them, “Cease telling me that stuff as a result of it’s simply going to mess with me — I don’t know the place to place that info.” I felt possibly I actually don’t know what I’m doing or possibly they’re going to search out out I don’t know what I’m doing. If too many individuals begin this too intently, possibly I’m screwed. I still get waves of it now, when individuals say, “Do you understand what a cultural phenomenon ‘The Sopranos’ was?” It still feels uncommon, is actually all I can say. Edie Falco, who performed Carmela Soprano on ‘The Sopranos’Everett Assortment Tony Sirico (Paul “Paulie Walnuts” Gualtieri): The entire present was actual. You wanted some humor. Folks had been getting killed left and proper. Paulie made you chortle, however he killed just a few individuals on the present. Surely, he put me on the map till the day I die. Jamie-Lynn Sigler (Meadow Soprano): It gave me one other household, stability and safety throughout a tumultuous 10 years so far as my private life went. I believe that, in very some ways, had I not had simply the present, but additionally the help that I had from all these individuals all through all these years, I is likely to be a unique particular person. I actually really feel like that have had an enormous half in shaping who I’m. Vincent Pastore (Salvatore “Large Pussy” Bonpensiero): We’d all hang around over on the West Financial institution on 42nd and Ninth and have lunch and do theater downstairs. Sooner or later, the proprietor came to visit and mentioned, “Did you see what they did for you down on the nook?” So we walked to Occasions Sq. — me, Dominic Chianese and Tony Sirico — and we noticed the large [HBO “Sopranos”] advert of us and we mentioned, “What?!” It was insane! Falco: Carmela appeared just like the uber-mom. I do know ladies like this . . . who actually are happiest when taking good care of different individuals. She ran that home, she bossed Tony round, she was actually in cost and had whole confidence in her capacity to try this. It was simply a part of her DNA. David Chase jogged my memory an excessive amount of my father; I put him in that place in my head. My father was additionally kind of a small, very vivid, very intense Italian man, socially a little bit awkward however good. There have been plenty of instances the place I didn’t, in an mental approach, perceive a sure script or why Carmela was doing a sure factor, however I knew that David knew, in order that was completely fantastic with me. Favourite Episodes Vincent Curatola (John “Johnny Sack” Sacramoni): I’ve to say my favourite episode is [“Long Term Parking”] the place Tony and Johnny have a nighttime assembly in a car parking zone. After like eight hours of capturing, Jimmy turns to me and says, “You’re both a very nice actor or an entire psycho,” as a result of I got here at him when it was my close-up and I simply tore into him. I mentioned, “Possibly a mix of each — you [as Tony] piss me off sometimes.” It was certainly one of my favourite capturing nights. Vincent Curatola, who performed Johnny SackGetty Photographs Dominic Chianese (Corrado “Uncle Junior” Soprano): One second that stands out for me is [in the episode “Where’s Johnny?”] when Tony asks Junior, “Don’t you like me?” I let him know that I actually did love him, however I used to be simply crucial of him. I bear in mind once I noticed the [postproduction] looping on that scene, I couldn’t imagine how highly effective it was — I used to be in tears. Steve Schirripa (Robert “Bobby Bacala” Baccalieri): Clearly, “Pine Barrens,” which is without doubt one of the first instances they gave me one thing to essentially do with the blokes. Additionally the episode when we went upstate to the lake home [“Sopranos Home Movies”]. I loved that one. Bobby and Tony had the large combat; Jim and I had been pleasant and it was exhausting to try this . . . however we had been actually going for it, choking and pulling hair and all that stuff fats guys do after they combat. Sirico: “Pine Barrens.” You may elevate the American flag proper alongside it. And “Eloise.” It was my mom’s favourite episode earlier than she handed. She favored the truth that Paulie obtained the [restaurant] rolls again for his mom. [Tony to his mother’s friend Minn: “These Parker House rolls? They belong to my Ma!”] She thought it was foolish and silly and she or he laughed . . . that her son was lifeless and [the] middle [of attention]. He knew these rolls. Pastore: “Funhouse” [the episode in which Big Pussy is whacked on a fishing boat by Tony, Paulie and Silvio Dante]. That was in all probability my favourite second. It was delicate and was simply written properly and . . . it was a pleasant approach of me leaving the present. I all the time mentioned to myself that, yeah, [Big Pussy] was knocked off within the second season, however David Chase and all of the writers gave me such an amazing second season. That scene when Paulie says to me, “You had been like a brother to me” and Tony says, “To all of us” — that was all truthful stuff, the way in which we had been personally concerned with one another’s non-public lives and the way in which we labored. Memorable Moments Sirico: “The Sopranos” simply occurred. I do not forget that I’d met this hard-nosed man outdoors. It was David Chase. I went over to him and mentioned, “Mr. Chase, I’m Tony Sirico. Something you want from me,” and I obtained actually near him, “something in any respect . . .” He checked out me and thought I used to be a nut, however then he noticed me breaking balls on the set and hanging with the blokes. Jamie-Lynn Sigler, who performed Meadow SopranoEverett Assortment Chianese: I’ll let you know a beautiful story. I used to be going to Rao’s [restaurant] as soon as and there have been 4 girls sitting on chairs. It was springtime and the present was a significant hit. As I glided by, one of many girls mentioned, “You! Why did you shoot your nephew?” I mentioned, “Was I in my proper thoughts once I shot him?” She mentioned, “No.” I mentioned, “There’s your reply.” Folks actually believed the present, that’s how good it was. Sigler: My first massive second was once I filmed the faculty episode, which was kind of Meadow’s first massive second, and I had plenty of one-on-one time with Jim. I bear in mind him giving me plenty of appearing classes within the sense of what I might ask for, as an actor, on the set. The ultimate scene I shot at Silvercup Studios. It was a quite simple factor of getting me enter a room and go away, and so they requested me to do it once more and I used to be type of confused as to why. Once I did one other take, your entire solid and crew and all of the producers got here down from their workplaces and mentioned, “That’s a wrap on Jamie.” I still get emotional speaking about it now — simply searching on the a whole bunch of those that had meant a lot to me. The one phrases I might get out between my blubbering snot and tears had been “Thank You.” Schirripa: I got here on the present within the second episode of the second season. I had no [acting] profession earlier than that. I used to be the full-time leisure director on the Riviera Resort [in Las Vegas]. “The Sopranos” didn’t know I had one other job and the lodge didn’t know I used to be on “The Sopranos” whereas I used to be [first] capturing it. I particularly bear in mind this: It was me, Dominic and Jim doing a scene in Newark in Junior’s home. I bear in mind we rehearsed it and Jim mentioned, “Let’s return to my trailer and run the traces.” I used to be there with Dominic and Jim and I’m saying to myself, “How the f- -k did I get right here?” It was like an out-of-body expertise — I’d simply watched the present on TV and now I’m in Jim’s trailer. Tony Scirico, who performed Paulie GualtieriGetty Photographs I met [“Sopranos” co-star] Little Steven [Van Zandt] on the studying. I used to be all the time an enormous E Avenue Band fan, and the night time of the [season] premiere at John’s Pizza, Little Steven got here as much as me and mentioned, “You wanna meet Bruce?” I used to be saying to myself, “Bruce Springsteen simply noticed me act.” That’s what runs by way of your head. I bear in mind after capturing my first episode, on the finish of the night time, Jim obtained out of his SUV, shook my hand and mentioned, “We’ll see you once more.” That season I did six episodes. Curatola: I introduced [“Sopranos” writer] Terence Winter to Hackensack Medical Heart and obtained him attached with an oncologist who advised Terry what Johnny [who was battling cancer] would appear to be at sure factors, what medicines he can be on. Then we had the nice fortune to herald [acclaimed director] Sydney Pollack [who had a cameo as a doctor-turned-prison custodian who encounters Johnny before he dies]. That was a spotlight of my engaged on “The Sopranos.” The Legacy Chianese: One of many funniest issues occurred: We had been in France at a really romantic-looking and exquisite lodge, and I walked out on the balcony and mentioned to myself, “Oh, my God, I’m within the films right here, what am I doing in Paris?” And I appeared over to my proper — I anticipated to see possibly Sophia Loren or Katharine Hepburn — and Jimmy [Gandolfini] walks out in his gown, in his underwear, smoking a cigar. He appears to be like at me and I take a look at him and we begin cracking up. It was an amazing second, humorous as hell. Schirripa: Dominic [Chianese] has all the time obtained a spot in my coronary heart. I labored with him, largely, initially and he was very affected person with me, very soothing. He couldn’t have been extra nurturing. I used to be very fortunate to get to work with him initially. Sigler: What I used to be coping with in real-life stuff . . . I had an consuming dysfunction after which I went by way of a divorce and privately, I used to be coping with my MS prognosis. The present gave me a secure place the place I felt like these individuals who I regarded so extremely and admired a lot still liked me and supported me. Dominic Chianese, who performed Junior SopranoEverett Assortment Pastore: The mob films had been actually beginning to peak — you had “The Godfather” trilogy then “Goodfellas,” the films like “State of Grace” . . . so for individuals to have the ability to sit at residence on Sunday night time and watch a narrative a few mob household, it was actually due. “The Sopranos” crammed that void. Curatola: I believe individuals who watched and followers mentioned to themselves, “I want I used to be Tony Soprano — I don’t need to punch a clock, I make 100 grand every week and I’ve individuals I hope are loyal.” To me, in that subculture, that’s what’s golden to those guys: “My God, gee, I want had a crew like that, I might name up Paulie at three within the morning and he’ll handle it for me.” It’s that energy play. I‘ve all the time had the thought that whenever you take a look at guys like this [on “The Sopranos”], they by no means go to courtroom — they settle the whole lot in a short time. It’s about who has all of the toys on the finish. Possibly, to a level, they needed to present the impression that they had been doing the suitable factor by different individuals. Even Tony Soprano mentioned, “F–okay it. What’s all of it about? To place meals on the desk for future generations.” Sirico: We sat across the desk [for the read-throughs] for [one] week’s script and broke balls earlier than David got here down. All of us. It was like a household when it got here to the read-through, with all of the faces and the humor. It was completely stunning. Falco: A few summers in the past, Aida [Turturro] and I made a decision to take a seat down and watch the collection, right through. There are numerous I still haven’t seen and others I noticed once I shot them. However we couldn’t do it; we obtained 4 episodes into the primary season and it was an excessive amount of, it was too exhausting to look at it and go on together with your day. It brings up an excessive amount of — I do not forget that day or how I wanted a dressing up or this one was in a foul temper or regardless of the hell it was. Possibly sometime I can do it.” Share this: https://nypost.com/2019/01/09/why-we-still-cant-fuhgeddabout-the-sopranos-20-years-later/ The post Why we still can’t ‘fuhgeddabout’ ‘The Sopranos’ 20 years later appeared first on My style by Kartia. https://www.kartiavelino.com/2019/01/why-we-still-cant-fuhgeddabout-the-sopranos-20-years-later.html

[emmaemmag33-blog]

A Sunday in the middle of June, 2018 Heney Lake was where I was headed before the stroke struck. I was going there for peace and for quiet. For help. I never made it that February. I went to the hospital instead. Now, four and a half years later, I’m here. In the middle of the lake, surrounded by deep green Canadian trees and cold blue water. And I feel peace and I feel quiet. I can see where I’ve been and where I am. A moment of clarity. Though they don’t tend to last long and I’m still seeking help, always with the help. I’m just back from four weeks of desperate help-seeking in San Diego, with Waleed, his Neuro IFRAH hands. It’s Father’s Day. Before I came out here to the middle of the lake, Dad was helping me load stuff into the boat––lifejacket, purse with notebooks, pens, watercolours, bag full of snacks, towels. I’m in my white cotton dress with the big pink roses on it that’s more like a shirt with a frilled skirt falling at the tops of my thighs. My worn out coral hanky-panky underwear have slipped down from my hips because I failed to lift them all the way up when I stood from the toilet–– I tend to pull my stuff up quickly and only on one side often leaving shirts, skirts tucked into underwear, toilet paper in in the waistband. I pause before stepping onto the dock feeling the thong slide down my thighs unable to pull them up since my right hand is full. I stand frozen and crack up, my thong now drooping from my knees to my ankles. Dad’s piling my things into the boat. “Sorry dad,” I say, “my underwear is falling I’ll fix them in a sec.” He turns around shaking his head, smiling the way he’s smiled at me forever, half ignoring my situation while lifting my bags and water bottle from my arm. I bend down to adjust my underwear. In the middle of the lake now. Moving slow, the motor puttering behind. I love how it looks, my bare legs under this white cotton jumper with pink roses and green stems, feet in my white Velcro extra-large-on-the-left-side New Balance shoes and my scratched-up leg brace adorned with faded stickers propped up on the wooden ledge straddling the wide metal steering wheel. I feel pretty and like me in this outfit. Pretty olden day floral print old lady stuff. And my legs and pretty socks. There’s a green and scuzzy film on the water’s surface––pollen; springtime. I don’t mind. Dad does; he’s bothered, aware of every detail. I look around and take stock of this place: to my left the cottage up a steep hill where the Van Wycke’s rented one summer. Turtle Island to my right where we beaded endless bracelets perched on those rocks and dove into the water, made fires for roasting hotdogs on sticks. I always had one hand deep in the marshmallow bag. Marshmallow gum: mash the marshmallow by squeezing its insides with both sets of thumb and index fingers until you’ve mashed so good the marshmallow is now a shiny glob of goo, delicious marshmallow gum, and I was never without. Once pretended it was cottage cheese so no one would ask me for any. My fingers white and flecks of dirt on my face smeared with goo. I took Chris there to that spot at Turtle Island last summer just over a year ago from right now. We jumped naked off those rocks. I loved him blind. Even with all the signs. Signs like when he downed red wine at Gagné Road cottage and I nearly sent him home, away from my family, from me, but instead we took a boat ride to the bay, a quiet talk, another try, touch and tears and love, lying awake at night trying to soothe his shakes, I walk across the field in midnight black to get him an Ativan from my parent’s bathroom. His sick white face, my isolated panic, in the midst of this brand new trauma. Another fail. I still do love Chris, by the way, a year later. That man is a love. Is my friend. Loves and sees me all the way through. Full and full and it’s a beautiful, alive feeling when we get together. I become hyper and giggly running like a deranged person down the street at Sunset Cliffs where he took me for an evening nature moment in Ocean Beach a few weeks ago. I posed by a garden wall filled to bursting with Bougainvillea deep shades of fuchsia purple pink and red. I breathed. That was my first week of San Diego out of this previous four. Waleed mentioned not writing about my rehab perceptions from that time mainly the second week when Gina was there and I was sad and stressed and Waleed talked to me on the Friday but I want to share where I went, where I go in my mind and heart during those difficult rehab weeks, tunnels they are, I try so hard, to stay positive and light and grateful for what’s here. I should share those times, how it interferes and twines with my therapy. My healing. For rehab is a state of mind. So many frustrations about Waleed that I must write about whether to include or not will come later but for now I must get all my stories out, all bits and pieces this theme of wanting help, so desperate for help. Like I was before too… like when I was in London pre-stroke and found an acupuncturist online and he told me about empty spaces where people just dance dance and dance and I think about how now I would like to do that. Chris is my friend. Eloise is my friend, Noah my buddy, Lua my baby. Mommy my Mommy. Lee, Lee and Dad on the wooden boat with me last night after six hours dealing with scammers on the phone. Tequila and a hug from my brother. Dad puffing on his cigar. Our favorite spot on the lake “there they are” we turn our heads to the jumping rocks, the cliffs we’ve all jumped from over the years, memory stored in each shaded rock and crack of that hunk of nature. Lee says to dad “You certainly know what you like: views, light, privacy.” Lee and I list all of dad’s property priorities. I love these men. All the irritations and nuances involved. But how often it ends up being us three, out on a boat, far off in the lake. And now, a solid week after my return from four weeks of a hard-marathon-but-did-it-with-a-smile-San Diego time I am here in dad’s funky red boat, feet up, cruising through Heney lake. This place that is a home, a safety, a paradise. A love infested green treed happy place. Gratitude: for being in nature and looking. Quiet stars at night and loons infusing us with sense memory as they sing and water laps like baby’s breath flowers against the rocks. Early in the season like this mid-June we see a duck family, a train of fluffy yellow babies following their mom/dad, and as summer goes on we throw chunks of stale bread into the lake for them and watch as they change with every visit, the babies lose their fluff, growing older and by the end they’re grown. Just like us humans do. Like Eloise, the same age as my stroke. Born four months before. Enough time for us to bond sans- stroke like when I changed her diaper in the white master bedroom office with the view of blue ocean by the window, cleaning her bum while she looked up at me quiet and happy and we bounced on an exercise ball until she fell asleep in my arms, her precious face warm against my chest. Next I’d see her is the garland of photos in my hospital room then six months later while I convalesced and Jess and family came and it hurt me bad that I couldn’t lift her. I made my first goal at TMS study to be able to lift and carry my niece with two arms. But then her first birthday came and another summer together at Heney Lake when she called me in her high-pitched angel baby voice: Em? EM! And we followed Lua and she fell for my cat calling after him Ca! ca! Now she’s 4 1/2 and we talk and take drives to the bagelshop and visit the river to look for driftwood under the melted snow, we take scooter rides and bike rides where she sits in the basket of my tricycle and we ride to the Green Park where she runs and I watch, we cuddle we play. I think of that quote I heard once about how The last time you pick up your child you don’t know it’s the last time but there’s always a last time. I thought of that the other day watching Lee struggle to scoop and lift her into a hug. She mocks me for liking flowers I point them out all the colors in neighbors gardens while we ride through our streets on my red scooter. We sit in my closet upstairs and she asks about dying why Abby died if Ian died why I am not married did my brain break because it is delicate? She points to a picture and says that’s not you but it is me, it’s me in a life jacket with Ian a decade ago from now I’m holding a paddle and Lulu says it doesn’t look like me and why don’t I have my stroke anymore. She asks questions about how it happened her questions evolve as she grows. “I want to go inside your head and see what’s wrong” she jokes but wow what a concept. And when I correct her to say I had a stroke not have a stroke she insists I’m wrong. No, Aunty Emma, you have a stroke. See because look at your arm and your leg and you still can’t run fast. And so, I suppose she’s right, I suppose I have a stroke still. And at night curled together in my parent’s big bed for a sleepover she asks how long until my stroke is gone and I confess I feel/fear/believe it will be with me for life. We haven’t hid under the covers to be close and snuggly like we used to constantly, pretending to be baby dogs or cats, in a while. I wonder if the last time for that has already passed. I’m now looking at the bay I wrote about recently for the summer of 2015 chapter — Nymph Bay and how I swam off the white boat and then got stuck like a naked loonytoon trying to climb back onto the wooden plank —what did that all mean to be in the bay that day in the summer, where was I? And where am I now? Just be. Be here. Are the two different? Four weeks in San Diego inside my head I repeated: at least I have a hand. A hand I can try to heal and recover movement. At least I have a hand, it wasn’t amputated. I stare at my left arm and hand then. All the young girls in therapy and how their presence shook me. All girls with strokes, all younger than me. I’m nearing thirty. Libby a teenager; staph infection gone wrong. Alison, 22; surgery fail. Three from Hasidic New York. Their own world. I feel less alone in my story with these girls near me. But I stay separate, and something off putts me about them. Something ugly I imagine… like the feeling I get when I see another article or memoir written about girls who had strokes and holes in their hearts. Every movement, progress, release is a victory, a mini miracle: Just do it, keep working, dissociate: no memory no desire, just movement, come on, release my mind, drop down into my heart, just be, let go and move. Ahggg… fingers and brain, brain and fingers, signals we’re trying so hard. Abby’s hand holds mine. She holds my right hand and I turn my head to the window and feel her light while Waleed’s got my left hand. Abby, Abby, Abby, I feel, and try hard not to cry, but hold her strength and move just move. Open fingers, now close gentle, gentle, now open. That Yin and healing yoga class, and driving through Encinitas along California Highway One, a new experience for me, music playing, ocean at my left, Del Mar ferris wheel lit up at my right, and Chris my love my friend our struggle and our resolution. He hadn’t realized how officially out I was. Even though I love him and I do I do, like a dear friend, a love buddy, but my gut, my mind over the line, no consideration for fresh starts and I told him this and he’s sad. And I was too, am too, but different. Because of what we had there for a moment, a tacit knowing, a connecting of soulmates. I always felt You found me when I looked at him. The tiny cottage on the rock at the north end, where I’m passing now, where I took Chris to show where we would live, how I imagined asking owners about buying it. This tiny hut I wanted for us, more his speed. I’m staring into the bay, I feel okay…for now. Exhale, release jaw. There are many layers piled high in me, inside the deep well that’s been around since stroke struck. Just before this past tunnel-month in San Diego, I had Mara’s wedding, Mara from childhood, from summer camp and highschool. I bawled when she walked down the aisle, painful tears that lasted all night, memories of the last night of camp and afraid of goodbyes, on stage with her friends lip-syncing to Spice Girls I hid in the back like my 11 year old insecure self, now insecure with my big white Velcro shoes and black boot-like hand brace. My heart thudded hard all evening and I hated that tomorrow all these people would leave. Sophie to her life in Toronto, Lindsay to LA, Carly and Mara and all the rest Toronto. I drove to the river the next day and looked into the branches still bare from winter, and realized it was Abby’s four year anniversary. That she’d have turned 24, but she will always be twenty. Just twenty. And I howled for Abby. For her life that has gone and for mine here without. I stared empty into the river water current moving fast, bare branches and cool sunset breathing slow and quiet. Went home and slept in my fluffy pink bed like a cloud, my black and white Lua baby curled at my feet. Probably I watched a few episodes of Gilmore Girls, to escape and not be with just me. One week later I’m back up at the cottage, the whole family is here. I’m picking dad’s purple flowers and squinting into the lake at the silver boat in the distance. My contacts aren’t in, I can barely see. But closer they come in it’s Britt and Jim and their two little ones. Jess and Dad with Noah and Lu stop to say a quick hello (Dad later unable to let go of the fact that Mila and Nolan weren’t wearing life jackets. I mean… did anyone else notice?! Shock eyes). I kneel next to their boat and hug Britt, my friend since forever, from down the cottage road. She and Jim have two kids already but are getting married this summer. By the way, I tell her, I actually don’t have a plus one. I selected so on the website but I don’t! Just FYI. And my stomach is flipping even though I really don’t care that I don’t have a plus one! Or do I? No friends in town… Lulu my best friend I joke, but…And while Britt explains it’s no big deal I can bring anyone they gave everyone a plus one it’s a casual party they want everyone to have fun, my well is overflowing and I feel that sad that pain that cringing self loathing and I want to cry and go home and I’m not feeling good inside. We wave goodbye and I sink into the Adirondack chair under the tree and curl into a ball and cry and hurt. But just for a moment, then breathe and lift my head and let’s get out of here for a moment. I’m upstairs trying to pack a bag with things to take out on the red boat. I’ll get out on the water again like I did last weekend, find quiet and clarity, smoke a joint. Breathe. But Mom is writing me a cheque for Spain, because she’s Mom and truly the greatest even when I’m pissy, even when I’m annoyed. I’m pacing across the downstairs gathering puzzle pieces and books, a snack a---What’s wrong Em? Are you ok? I look this way and that, pacing back and forth, the pains from last few life events boiling at the base of me, but I don’t look at her, my mom sitting on the big soft couch. Em? Come here, sweetheart. I’m beside her on the couch aware of my dad at the kitchen sink, uncomfortable. It’s just these triggers, I say, and whispering: I don’t want to cry in front of dad, my mouth curling into crying mouth. “It’s not actually about the plus one,” and at that first tear mom wraps her arms around me and I collapse into her arms my face against her chest the place I always long to be, collapse into her warm body like a pillow the most familiar cozy mommy pillow and I cry loud and hard like a baby, my mom holding me tight, somehow both of us configured into the perfect position. She holds me tighter and I holler cry that unstoppable weeping kind that amazes me every time it comes, so loud and strong, a life of its own, no stopping it, especially with your mom rocking you, her own body heaving and crying above mine, Aware of my Dad in there with us too, standing somewhere close, and I see Abby without Sandy to be held by and Sandy without Abby to hold and I’m so aware of how precious this moment is to be held by my mother. After it quiets down Dad walks over and kisses the top of my head. Woah, I say. And to mom: “We’re all just babes who want our mommies to hold us, rock us, no words, make it all better.” I lift myself up from Mom’s lap and she starts laughing, taking me in. Look at you she says, pointing at my ridiculous white cotton pantaloon set outfit. The one I bought while a bit stoned from the garden sale lady in La Jolla, these much too large white pantaloons, those pink roses green stems, frills below my knees and the matching jumper on top frills at the waist. Like a clown I am, yet this is typical me. And we laugh. Were you on drugs when you bought this stuff, Em?? And I said that yes indeed I’d been stoned but don’t you just love the fabric, the roses, and individually the pieces work! Not long until I’m back in the red boat, lake so still, raindrops pitter patter perfect on its glass surface. Dark green blue, this magic place. This place in life.