#empires s1 joel

[occasonal-empires-doodles]

Tall Wife

☆》 5 《☆

[m0ther-of-p3arl]

i cannot put into simple words how much i adore joel's tool and armor names

like honestly this man comes up with the funniest shit and it's so dumb but its such a JOEL thing to do my god

here are a few that have come up in my empires s1 binge

he's my favorite and so ridiculous

[arthropod-concoctions]

“Pix? What are you digging around in MY empire for?” Jimmy asked, hand hovering over his sword.

“Oh, hey Jimmy! Look, I can explain. My peers told me there was evidence of there being remains of an ancient civilisation, just below-”

“Jimmy?” Statue-Joel hadn't managed to successfully exit the hole in the ground, but he peeked over the edge the second he heard Jimmy's voice. Jimmy looked over, and caught his eye.

There was dead silence for a few seconds as the two stared at each other. Oh great, Pixl thought. Arguing with Joel is not going to make him less mad at me-

Then Jimmy burst out laughing.

“What- what's happened here? Why are you so small? Pix, did you do this?” Smiling, Jimmy walked towards the hole Joel was still stuck in, and broke some surrounding sandstone to help Joel get out. Sure enough, standing on level height, Jimmy was a good several inches taller than the statue.

“Who's a small toy now, huh? HUH?”

Strangely enough, Joel didn't seem at all inclined to mock Jimmy back; he just looked at him, as if he was seeing a ghost. “Where did you run off to, Jimmy?”

“Huh? I was just stopping by the Eversea to get some more gunpowder. Why do you care about that?” Jimmy asked, then shrugged. “Whatever. I don't care. The point is, little man, that...” Jimmy continued his tirade against statue-Joel, who still seemed too stunned to retort. This would be the perfect time for Pixl to bail out of this situation, he realised. He turned around, preparing to leave...

Only to walk directly into the real Joel.

“Did someone mention a little toy man? Are you talking about yourself again, Jimmy?” real-Joel asked, with a mean grin. Jimmy spun around immediately, then looked between real-Joel and statue-Joel.

“No... I thought- Pix, what did you do? Why are there two of them!?”

“Oh, did you make a statue of me? That's nice.” Real-Joel crouched down and tapped against statue-Joel's cheek. Strangely enough, the latter didn't react at all- he just turned to Jimmy. “Two of what?”

“Two of- of you, Joel. You're here, but so is the dumb giant-” Jimmy hesitated for a moment, disgust visible on his face- “the god over there.”

An expression flashed across statue-Joel's face for a moment. “God? What are you talking about? Don't be ridiculous, Jimmy. Gods aren't real.”

“EXCUSE ME?” Joel's voice boomed, accompanied by the sound of thunder in the distance. “That is VERY offensive, I'll have you know! You'll pay for that!”

Statue-Joel still didn't react. This just made real-Joel even angrier; he pulled back his foot and prepared to kick the statue. “No, wait!” Pixl shouted, but it was too late; Joel's foot hit the statue square in the stomach-

And bounced backwards, not moving him even an inch. Real-Joel yelped in pain and grabbed his foot; Jimmy bent over laughing, and statue-Joel just looked at Pixl in confusion.

“Forget this! I'm going to Stratos, where real gods live! Goodbye, toys!” Joel took off flying, leaving the three of them in various states of confusion.

“Oh my gosh. That was amazing. 'gods arent real'- I've gotta use that one sometime,” Jimmy said, wiping tears of laughter from the corner of his eye. “You're much better than the other Joel.”

“...What just happened? Are you two okay?”

“We're fine! I should be asking you, you're the one who just got kicked...” Jimmy trailed off. “Wait... could you actually not see him?” Statue-Joel just minimally shook his head in response. He seemed overwhelmed.

Jimmy stammered for a few seconds, then shook his head and said: “You know what? Don't even worry about it. I've decided, that guy is fake, you're the real Joel in my eyes.” He walked over to the statue and hit him on the shoulder affectionately-

and Joel suddenly wrapped his arms around him in a hug. He pushed his head into Jimmy's shoulder, and- started to cry? Jimmy hesitated, but after a second hugged him back, and patted Joel reassuringly on the back as his shoulders began to shake.

“Well... i'll leave you two to it. Goodbye!” Pix said, gathered up his supplies, and flew off. Well this was quite the afternoon... He'd have to go back and talk to the new Joel later. For now, he was just happy to get out of this mess unharmed.

(ch 1 | ch 2 | ch 4)

[asmallcommitteeoffrogs]

I don't think I'm capable of being normal about Joel Smallishbeans

[i-got-hit-by-a-planet]

mazalea joel my beloved

also high speeds joel lmao get squished bozo

[rainy-daze1]

s1 empires lizzie and joel are like malfina and connecticut clark to me

[gremnda]

my favourite headcanon is e!joel being just a human in a fantasy world and still making amazing builds while scoring a sea goddess as his wife

[hannnsh]

empires season 1 will always be my fav 🥹

this took a long time and i finished it all in one sitting and i have school tomorrow 💀💀

for people that commented on my other post thankyou so much🥹 idk y tumblr wont let me reply </3

[justl-12]

Empirestober2:

Day 10: Rules

Everybody must look like him

I am so behind, but i'll try catch up over the weekend

[codgod]

a relic of time gone by

mostly just because i think it’s really funny to compare them, here’s the original statue

[jestroer]

Bisexual wives of all time

[doodle-list]

The Codfather assembles his allies 

Am I going overboard with these? Yes oops

[lemonberry-conda]

I love the idea of Empires S1 Joel being a doll or a sentient statue, I like to imagine that his craftsmanship is so good, the joints so hidden, that no one notices until he takes off his head.

[arthropod-concoctions]

King Joel of Mezalea had died of a broken heart.

That's the conclusion he came to, at least.

He had felt rage, at first, at the destruction of his palace. Months of work, ruined in a few minutes; he'd have to start all over again. He had stormed off to find Lizzie, or Jimmy, or anyone, really, willing to listen to him complain for a bit. But they had both vanished. Citizens of the codlands had mentioned seeing Jimmy run off into the distance, seemingly crying and refusing to speak with anyone; and the Ocean Empire had no citizens left, the shoreline having receded so far it left the aquatic city completely dry. No one had seen Lizzie anywhere, but he didn't give up on her. She has been able to live on land before, surely she would be alright...?

He did find her, days later, among a ragtag group of refugees; but she wasn't the same. She had become shorter than him again, there was no trace of her aquatic origin, and worst of all, she had no memory of him or anybody else. Joel had tried getting to know her again, but to no avail; she wasn't his Ocean Queen anymore, and eventually she simply faded into the crowds of foreigners flowing into Mezalea. After all, the mesa kingdom had fared far better than most others; although the matral palace was still in ruins. Joel knew he should have rebuilt it; but what was the point, with no wife to show it to, no best friend to visit and look around in awe?

And so King Joel stopped building; he stopped visiting other empires (what was the point? Everything has fallen into ruin), he stopped speaking with the populace, and eventually he stopped paying any attention to the world around him at all. The Mother Tree withered, smothered by the unchecked crowds, and one by one the Mezaleans born from it lost their life force. Mezalea became a place of broken towers and silent statues, slowly getting covered in sand by the winds.

There King Joel laid. His clay body needed no air; eventually his world was reduced to nothing but the sand covering his body and his own thoughts. He had never experienced death for long; there was always respawning, always another Mezalean body for his soul to enter. But now, laying immobile in the dunes of his former glory, his mind stayed, alone.

This must be what death is.

…..

….........

A bout of sharp pain struck his arm.

Joel felt as if he was waking up from a deep sleep. He hadn't felt anything but the sand against his body and the subtle vibrations of the earth for... years? Decades? He thought it must have been at least a decade. But now something had hit his arm, and the sand was shifting around him, and... did he hear muffled voices?

Suddenly the sand was removed from his face. He was blinded by sunlight, but when his eyes adjusted, the first thing he saw was a familiar face. He was getting excavated by none other than King Pixlriffs, who looked less like a king and more like a guy who explores ruins for fun. He was frantically writing notes in a book, muttering to himself while doing so;

“This is an incredible discovery. Seems like the god Joel was around even when ancient peoples lived here, and had enough influence to have statues made in his honor...”

So Pix still remembered his name, although he was talking about things that made no sense to Joel. He also didn't seem to realise Joel could hear him. He tried to sit up, but failed miserably; his lower body was still covered with sand, not to mention he hadn't moved in a century. Baby steps; maybe try talking first.

“...Pix?”

(part 2 | AO3)

[sleepyy-dakota]

🌊✨

[muffubur]

my parents 👆👆

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