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leejihoonownsmyheart · 9 months

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can there be a p2 to the jeonghan i’ll do anything pic pleasee

"If you really want..." Hansol's voice was a bit hesitant as his fingers clutched around the small dark vape cartridge in his hand. "We were all going to get high and watch Finding Nemo."

He shrugged off-handedly as if it was something so mundane to him he couldn't imagine you wanting to do it with him. And that hesitance made sense because to him this was mundane. You had heard him and Irene making these plans around you a million times and yet you had never gotten an invite.

But today you had somehow managed to get one.

You tried not to come off as too excited.

"Sure, it's been a while since I've seen Finding Nemo."

Hansol nodded, a smile flickering across his lips as he turned over his shoulder, back toward the room that you two had just come from. You followed him, both of you sticking your heads back through the doorway.

"Y/n and I are headed out," he announced. You sent a timid smile Seungcheol's way, and as you did you turned around, excited to follow Hansol off but instead of following you ended up colliding.

You glanced up in shock, squinting to figure out who was staring down at you with an incredulous expression on his face.

You immediately straightened up, pressing your lips into a tight thin line.

"Oh, Jeaonghan, you just missed us," Hansol commented. Jeonghan's eyes flicked over to Hansol's for only a second.

"Us?"

"We're meeting up with Irene, Mark, Eunbi, and Yerin," Hansol elaborated and he so clearly didn't see the expression on Jeonghan's face that you did. You wished, in fact, that you couldn't tell that Jeonghan was upset with you. You didn't entirely know why Jeonghan was upset with you.

You looked away from Jeonghan, and instead found a spot on the floor.

"Y/n's going with you?" He asked. Hansol hummed.

"Not as innocent as we thought I guess," Hansol commented. "Asked for a hit of my vape."

"Yeah?"

His gaze was practically burning into you.

"And you were telling me about that party you went to last-"

Your eyes widened and you darted forward, your hand covering Hansol's mouth before you could consider the repercussions for your actions. Hansol stared at you in confusion, and you forced a laugh, letting your hand slide down to his shoulder.

"Can't tell everyone about the party."

"Considering that Seobin taught you how to smoke cigarettes I would think you would be ecstatic to tell everyone about the party."

There was dead silence between you three, in fact, you weren't even breathing.

"You know, considering the fact you're trying to make people see you more seriously."

"You know what? That does make me see y/n in a different light."

You risked a glance up at Jeonghan, who had a scarily calm expression on his face.

"Why don't I walk y/n to Irene's though? Didn't Soonyoung have some project he needed to talk to you about?" Jeonghan asked, directing his attention fully to Hansol. Hansol's eyebrows furrowed and he looked down at his hands.

"Shit, you're right."

As he thought over Jeonghan's proposition his hand raised to his face, and the light on his vape lit up, the artificial smoke drifting out of his mouth after only a moment.

"Y/n, Jeonghan can get you there. I'll be there after only a few moments."

He held out his vape just the same way that he had a few minutes ago, expecting you to take another hit. You decided not to overthink it. You grabbed the vape, breathed in too fast, and a cool and sharp bit of air and smoke hit the back of your throat. You coughed out in surprise but mostly kept the sudden reaction concealed.

Hansol smiled.

"You're getting used to it. I'll see you in a second."

And then he was rushing off, leaving you all alone with Jeonghan at your side.

It wasn't like you were doing anything wrong. You weren't doing anything that anyone your age had told you not to. You were just trying new things, and hanging out with new people and... Making everyone think differently of you.

Now that Hansol thought you were willing to try all of these new things he was looking at you differently. No longer that smile that haunted you when people asked you if you wanted to smoke with them out of convention. The look in their eyes that said that they knew you were going to turn down the offer, and that look that screamed to you that they looked at you as more of a perfect porcelain doll than a human.

And yet, looking away from Hansol's expression, the way that said that he finally thought you were normal, you turned and looked to Jeonghan's and you saw something else.

He didn't seem to see you as normal necessarily, and there was disappointment but that wasn't everything that was there... He didn't look at you like you had suddenly changed into something that ruined his perception of you... What was that look in his eyes?

"Cigarettes?" He asked you after a few moments. You stared at him and nodded. "How long were you at that party?"

Your hand raised subconsciously to the eyeliner you hadn't completely scrubbed off your eyebags. He huffed.

"And you're vaping now too?"

All things that you knew your parents would shame you for, and you felt shame. You felt like you had disappointed Jeonghan, but... Not the way that you felt like you should feel.

"You want me to teach you something today?" Jeonghan asked you. He closed the distance between you two, and dug his fingers into the roots of your hair. "Something like what I taught you the last time we were alone?"

Your breath hitched.

"Yes sir," you barely managed to get out, because as soon as the confirmation was out of your lips Jeonghan's lips were smashing into yours. Your hands quickly fell to his arm for purchase, your eyes smashed shut as every part of you forgot how to think.

You didn't even realize that you were desperately trying to press yourself into the kiss until Jeonghan had pulled away and you realized you were on the tips of your toes.

You stared at him, chest heaving, ready to be obedient for him.

"Today you're going to learn how to be quiet."

Jeonghan shoved you towards a closet and smashed the two of you inside of it. He then dug his fingers into your hair again and forced you down to your knees.

"Today you're going to learn how to suck dick."

You felt your mouth growing wetter as you stared up at Jeonghan, the dim light of the closet framing the dark look in his eyes.

"And today you're going to learn how to hide when you've done something naughty."

#In time i'll write this #but you'll have to remind me in like two weeks #b: 익명

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ventismacchiato · 1 year

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some more btl headcanons bc why not lol(specifically kpop related *insert that one spongebob "when worlds collide" audio*)

ps this will include plenty of my beloved nugus so if you don't recognize a name that's probably why lol

obviously scara has his stuff already so I won't be listing it so I don't lose the dopamine too early

star is whatever we like

xiao is a diehard dreamcatcher fan, literally has been there since debut and probably has an almost complete set of photocards for everyone. cried when they won their first award. definitely does live reactions to groups music videos/dance practices on stream. other groups I can see him liking are craxy, nmixx and purple kiss, but also k-bands like xdinary heros and purple beck

aether probably isn't too into kpop tbh💀 he supports xiao in his dreamcatcher stanning but that's probably the only group he actually knows members and stuff lol. he definitely watches survival shows tho and spam texts xiao every elimination episode. doesn't keep up with the groups after the show ends. i can definitely see him stanning eunbi post-iz*one, he makes underwater his ringtone. also stans alexa and watched all of american song contest bc she was his pick during produce 48

jean probably listens to popular groups just bc she doesn't have much time to search out for any smaller ones. can see her liking red velvet, feel my rhythm is her favorite song from them. will listen to any group that any of the people in the au tell her about, and from them I can see her listening to iz*one and purple kiss

childe is payola(/j). no but fr tho, whenever his faves release anything ever he is collecting albums and photocards until he has complete collection. he's rich and so will travel to south korea to watch his groups at inkigayo and music bank so he can get broadcast pcs. he's not creepy tho and so he's on "friendly stranger" terms with most of the idols in groups he likes. at this point, it's a game with his fans to find him in the background of any photos of groups he likes leaving/entering a music show. can see him liking a mix of groups, so probably twice, aespa, cherry bullet, and loona

heizou loves any and all groups that have lore. pixy, loona, stray kids, etc. if they have some sort of lore, then you can count on heizou being a fan of them. probably doesn't collect all that much, he usually just buys one version of an album and accepts whatever photocards are in it like a weirdo. definetly does streams going through groups music videos/etc to look for lore and make theories

I can't remember anyone else and so I now present my theories lol

WHEN U SAID I WUDNT RECOGNIZE ANYONE I WAS LIKE DAMN BUT I RECOGNIZED EVERYONE U MENTIONED 😼 i’m just cultured like that

WDYM LOSE DOPAMINE TOO EARLY HELP

also i love this omg. i also don’t think aether wud be too into kpop, he only rlly knows things cus xiao talks about it to him and will attend concerts w him. i can totally see him eating up any survival show (he wud probably watch boys planet)

HEIZOU STANNING FOR LORE OMG adding txt to that list he probably does videos trying to dissect what’s going on

childe going all the way to korea for broadcast pcs HES SO REAL OMG 😭😭 he wud probably win fan calls and be super chill on them and when he’s at shows it turns into a mini meet n greet

kazuha probably listens to whatever heizou tells him he should but also he’s a music major so he probably does covers on the most popular songs he’s probably a keshi or DPR live stan or the rose like more soft songs yk

venti probably crazy about every group he wud be the type to decorate his lightsticks for every show and change his phone pc every other day

#behind the lens — asks

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spadesolace · 2 years

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synopsis: y/n did not intend to join the kpop industry but after her brother had convinced her, she's taken the industry by storm. what happens when she unintentionally catches the attention and heart for two members of the rookie group that's taking everyone by storm, newjeans?

previous | masterlist | next

fimmies

MIYAWAKI SAKURA: 98, yn's gamer mom, absolutely would spoil the girls and yn but ends up being made fun of.

KIM CHAEWON: 00, leader of LESSERAFIM, half of the time she's just asking eunbi how to do certain things but ends up just doing her own thing. stressed but rebranded herself.

HUH YUNJIN: 01, true power vocals, knows hanni's crush on yn but does not talk about it bc she respects her privacy.

NAKAMURA KAZUHA: 03, 4th gen black swan, so graceful, so pretty, but always has that disgusted face reaction on default.

HONG EUNCHAE: 06, the true maknae on top, MACHAE FTW. everyone loves her, the entire group izone basically adopted her and it was a wrong move to let yn and eunchae meet.

taglist: @lesbianslovesminji @sserajeans @trsrina @invusblog @haerinstolemyhrt @txtbrainrot @ddenoudepression @cfvgbhndun-new-blog @lcv3lies @rd0265667 @somsomishy @dream-chasers-things

#newjeans #kim minji newjeans #newjeans imagines #newjeans x reader #minji x reader #kim minji x reader #kim minji #pham hanni #hanni x reader #newjeans hanni #new jeans hanni #newjeans smau #polaroid love smau

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iznsfw · 6 months

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I'm curious on how many Eunbi pictures you have saved? Since I always see you posting new ones even for reactions 😆

I can't even count. Here are my albums for Eunbi, and that's not counting the uncategorized ones.

Sorry.

#ask #anon

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b3alm1ghty · 9 months

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ੈ✩‧₊˚ the aftermath

뱀! ✦. 231209 ; bam! shared apartment

✦. characters ; the members of bam!, mentions of yang eunbi ! ✦. warnings ; this takes place directly after hanbin's death and deals with the member's reactions. tw for graphic depictions of death, grief, mentions of blood, and slight body gore ! please let me know if i missed anything else ! ✦. word count ; 2.6k !

Kitae always relished the few days the group had off in a month. First, he started the day off by sleeping until 10:30, a beautiful contrast to the blaring alarm that typically woke the group up at 6:30 each morning. He liked to take long showers on those days, but not long enough to piss off the 5 others he had to share the apartment with. After, he’d go to a coffee shop or a bookstore just to sip on a warm drink and soak in a cozy environment before he felt obligated to return home for dinner.

The day was already going perfectly as planned, the tinkling of the alarm on his phone gently stirring him from his sleep exactly at 10:30 AM. He rose with a stretch, yawning to himself as he blearily looked around the room. Dohyun still slept like a rock in the lower bunk across from him, just as he always did.

He climbed down from his top bunk in his t-shirt and boxers, padding to the bathroom after noting that the rest of his group had already gotten up for the day. Jisung would likely be playing video games in the living room, Sammy still dedicatedly working his worn muscles in the dance studio. Bo liked to visit home when they had free time, and Hanbin had been with Eunbi last night. He tried not to have an opinion on that whole situation for his leader’s sake, but it was clear that the rest of them thought it was a bad idea.

He padded to the bathroom, knocking on the closed door, unsure of who may await inside. “Can I shower now?” he asked through the solid wood, knocking much firmer the second time when he received no response. Somebody must have just knocked the door closed or something.

Sleep still fogged his brain as he pushed the door open. Seeing someone inside, he instinctually apologized and was about to quickly shut the door again when he registered it. The red. The blood. The stained towel in Eunbi’s shaking hands. He froze, only a garbled yelp escaping from his mouth.

“Kitae,” Eunbi gasped. “He fell. Hanbin fell, he hurt himself, we need to get help,” her voice was frantic as she held his head in her lap, his blood smeared on the bathtub and across the tiled floor.

He couldn’t move. He just stared. The red seeped into his mind as it seeped out of Hanbin’s, staining his thoughts.

“Kitae!” she tried again, trying to shake him from his stupor.

“I’ll… I’ll call 112.. Just- just wait…” he stumbled over his words as he backed away from the scene, scrambling back to the bedroom to fumble for his phone and shake Dohyun awake, tears beginning to stream down his face that he didn’t even notice were there.

“Hyung please, please wake up, it’s Hanbin,” he cried, shoving him over and over again until his eyes blinked open, his brow furrowing in confusion.

“Tae, Tae, what’s wrong?” He asked blearily, trying to make out Kitae’s wet face.

“Hanbin fell, please help,” he begged, attempting to drag him from his bed. “I’ll call, just go help Eunbi. Bathroom,” his hands were shaking furiously as he pulled on the elder’s arm.

“Hanbin? Eunbi?” he managed to stand on his own two feet as Kitae pulled him from his bed, wandering towards the bathroom as instructed. The bloody scene caught him as off guard as it did Kitae. It took him a moment to register it all in his sleep-riddled mind. The blood. The lifeless body of his friend. Yang Eunbi in the middle of it all.

“Dohyun, help me, please,” Eunbi’s face had fear all over it, but was notably dry.

But Dohyun couldn’t move. He only saw Hanbin’s pale face, the image burning into his retinas. Usually a responsible one among the group, he always knew what to do when they were struggling. But now, his mind was completely empty, only flooded by the sight of his lifeless leader.

“Dohyun, please!” he heard a woman’s voice calling to him, but her voice sounded far away like he was underwater. Floating. Drowning.

He felt Kitae move him out of the way and watched through his peripheral as people in uniform swarmed their cramped apartment, putting their hands all over his friend. Touching his neck, his wrist, his chest.

Their movements were slower now, not urgent like they were when they first came in. Why did they slow down? Didn’t they understand his friend was in trouble? Or maybe it was his own mind slowing time down, watching everything going by in a slow-motion blur.

The police came. They took pictures of him. Hanbin liked taking pictures. He took pictures of himself, and of his members, and of things that he thought looked nice. He often wondered why more people didn't take pictures of him. He wanted people to want pictures of him. Hanbin wanted to be the thing that looked so nice, everyone wanted to take a picture. Was that why they took pictures of him now?

Somebody brought in a white sheet. Was Hanbin cold? He did always get cold so easily, wrapping himself tightly in layers and blankets. They lay it over his body, covering his face. He must be so cold now after lying on the tiled floor for so long. Dohyun always made sure he wasn’t too cold. If he got sick, they were all in trouble. He was their very backbone, after all.

The strange people carried Hanbin out of his field of vision. He heard crying behind the ringing in his ears. Maybe it was somewhere in the back of his own mind? Dohyun hoped they were taking him somewhere warm. He hoped they didn’t forget to take his jacket. It was so cold outside.

He hoped he would be back soon.

What would they do without him?

Jisung got the call at the internet cafe. Kitae called him first. He let it ring out the first time, engrossed in the game on the screen. He typically spent their free days in a similar state. He said it was the perfect way to rest his body but keep his mind sharp. Usually, he took up residence on their shared couch, hogging the TV and the PS4 as the rest of the members floated in and out around him, but he found Hanbin and Eunbi asleep there this morning instead.

The second time his phone rang, he cut it off, annoyed at the repeated intrusions.

The third time it rang, he finally picked up. “What, Kitae?” his tone was cutting in agitation until he heard the sobs on the other line.

“What? What’s going on?” He tore the headset off his head to focus on his friend’s voice.

“H-Hanbin–” was the only word that Kitae uttered before Jisung broke into a sprint out of the cafe. They would charge his card extra for leaving his station in shambles, but nothing else was on his mind other than what could have possibly happened to his best friend.

Hanbin and Jisung had been inseparable since their 6th year. Hanbin was the big dreamer and Jisung was always along for the ride. They were the first trainees at their tiny company. Hanbin always said they would be the trailblazers, making a name for themself and being the legendary sunbaes to the groups that were destined to follow them. A second coming of BTS. Jisung never quite saw the same vision, but as long as he was by Hanbin's side, he never quite minded either.

He made it back to the apartment, running the full 24 blocks and up all 4 flights of stairs, just as the paramedics were pronouncing him dead.

“Bin!” he called, shoving past the paramedics to kneel next to Hanbin, his blood pooled on the white tiles soaking into the knees of his jeans.

“Why aren’t you helping him?” He yelled at the nearest man in uniform, the man sitting back on the heels of his feet, looking defeated.

“He’s gone,” the man responded in a downtrodden voice. It only made Jisung angrier. Why did he have the right to be sad? If it was his closest friend lying lifeless on his bathroom floor, he wouldn’t stop until he was breathing again.

“Give him CPR! Bring him back! Use the–” he paused his demands, trying to think of the word he needed. “The, the heart thing!”

“We did CPR for nearly 10 minutes and he didn’t respond, his brain has lost oxygen for too long by now. I’m sorry,” he gave him a slight bow to emphasize his apology. This wasn’t easy on him either.

But Jisung wasn’t giving up. What would he do without his best friend? He placed his hands together over his friend’s chest like he saw in the TV shows, pressing down over and over, but he didn’t have real training. All he had was a desperate hope tearing at his heart.

“You’re just going to damage his body, sir–” the paramedic watched his desperate, unguided attempts, truly saddened by the sight.

“Shut up!” he yelled, continuing his attempted compressions. “If you won’t help him, I will!”

“Sung,” a familiar voice softly called to him, taking one of his arms, but he only tried to shake him off, his sole focus on bringing back his friend. Tears were starting to form in his eyes, blurring the view of Hanbin’s body under him.

“Sung, the police are coming now,” Sammy tried again, grabbing his shoulders to try and pull him away.

“Stop! I’m helping him!” His voice sounded as wounded as he looked. He clung to the front of his friend’s shirt now, shaking him instead of trying to force his heart to beat once more. “COME BACK!” He yelled in his pale face, suddenly so angry at Hanbin for leaving him here all alone. “Come back!” his plea was weaker this time as he allowed Sammy to drag him backward, away from the scene.

Sammy held Jisung’s limp and defeated form as heart-aching wails left his lips, heaving sobs wracking his body. They were all close, but no one had loved Hanbin quite like Jisung did. He never imagined he would ever lose him, let alone so soon.

The cries slowly stopped as Sammy helped him out of the way of the police investigators and their cameras. He led him to the couch where he sat, unmoving until he fell asleep from sheer exhaustion that night, simply staring blankly at the dark stains on the knees of his jeans.

Sammy was the second one called. Just as Kitae had guessed, he was practicing the new Shinee choreography in the rundown dance studio the company kept up. Although, “dance studio” was a pretty loose term for it considering it resided in the basement of their apartment building. Their company's CEO was friends with the landlord, the only reason they got their space for so cheap.

The ringtone of his phone interrupted Taemin’s voice, giving the dancer a well needed break. Sweat dripped from his hair and down his forehead despite the fact that the basement studio was freezing in the colder months. Using the edge of his shirt to dab the sweat from his face, he grabbed his phone as his chest heaved in his attempts to catch his breath. “Hello?”

Sammy ran up the four flights of stairs to their apartment, arriving just before the ambulance did. He caught sight of Hanbin, limp and growing paler by the second in Eunbi’s lap, just before he was gently shoved out of the way by the rush of paramedics.

He choked on the lump in his throat as he watched them frantically check for a heartbeat. He watched as they tried to revive him, putting all their weight into compressing his chest, forcing air into his lungs. The sickening cracks of his ribs under the force made him turn away, his whole body trembling. What if they couldn’t bring him back? What would they do?

He sat to the side with a still-sobbing Kitae, staring at his hands and trying to drown out the agonizing long minutes of the paramedics' efforts to revive his friend until Jisung barrelled in through the door, nearly gasping for air from running so far. Sammy’s heart was dreading this. He knew how close Sung and Hanbin had been and he knew that this was going to kill him. He stood to meet him, to hold him, to give him support until suddenly his friend was on his knees, attempting to save Hanbin himself.

It was a devastating scene of desperation as Jisung tried to claw for Hanbin’s soul, begging for it to return to the body before him.

“Sung,” he tried, trying to bring him back to the reality he ran from. The police had been called to investigate the scene as per protocol, and Jisung was about to be in the middle of it all.

He was able to pull him away as he cried out, silent tears slipping down Sammy’s cheeks as he let his friend grieve in his hold, his heart cracking more and more at the dismal sound.

Bokyung was at home when he received the call. It was after Hanbin had already been taken away, a death certificate written and signed. There was nothing he could have done from an hour train ride away.

“What’s wrong, honey?” His mother asked, brow knitted in that knowing concern mother’s had perfected. She could tell in the way that his expression dropped and the way his hand holding the phone to his ear trembled that he was not given good news.

As he set the phone down, wet eyes looked to her and she was instantly by his side, wrapping comforting arms around him. “Hanbin... He’s dead,” his voice cracked on the last word as tears flooded from his eyes.

“Oh, baby… I’m so sorry,” she whispered, gently petting his hair as he cried into her chest. She knew how close her son was with his group members. She remembered Hanbin well, staying at their house one Christmas when he didn’t have time to make it all the way back to Busan when they had a holiday album to promote. He was a good boy, kind and charming, and he had such a sparkle in his eye when he talked about their music. It was something she hadn’t seen in a long time in her own son.

It was a grief and sadness she had never wished to see on any of her children. Her usually sunny and uplifted Bokyung was broken in that moment, and she would have given anything to fix it. She had only met Hanbin’s parents once, after their small debut showcase, but she thought of them now, her heart aching for them. She couldn’t possibly imagine the heart-wrenching feeling of outliving your own child.

“I have to go back,” Bo whispered as his breathing slowly started to even out again.

She nodded in understanding. “I’ll help you pack, just… just rest for now, ok? Your heart needs to rest,” she sighed softly.

The apartment was silent when he returned that night. Jisung still sat on the couch. Dohyun lay unblinking in his bunk, staring at the metal bars supporting Bo’s own bed. Kitae and Sammy both sat in the kitchen, cold cups of coffee on the counter in front of them. No one spoke.

The bathroom door was closed, a haunting barricade hiding what lay just behind it.

Sammy greeted him when he entered, but his voice was quiet and hoarse as if he hadn’t used it all day.

Nothing felt right. There was no chatter, no music, no clicking of a video game controller. No clanging of pots and pans or chewing or laughter. The small apartment could have been completely empty and it wouldn’t have made a difference.

Without Hanbin, it definitely felt empty.

#one and all ! ੈ✩‧₊˚ writing ✦.#tw death #tw blood #tw grief #fictional kpop idol #fictional idol group #fictional idol community #fictional kpop group #fictional kpop community #kpop oc #fictional kpop oc #fictional idol oc #oc kpop idol #oc kpop group #fake kpop idol

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panda-writes-kpop · 1 year

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2 Years With Panda-Writes-Kpop

2 years. Holy shit.

The last two years have been chaotic and adventurous, entertaining and draining, and fun and emotional, but I wouldn't take back any of it. ❤️ I've had so much fun maintaining, managing, commenting, and being this online persona that you've all come to see, interact with, and enjoy. I mean, 1,300+ followers is absolutely nuts to me - I just enjoyed writing for the sake of writing and self-improvement. To see engagement on this level has been mind-blowing and phenomenal, and I'm so thankful. You've all helped lead me to new friendships and new experiences, and I couldn't be happier and more thankful to all of you.

So, here comes some good news - I won't be fully ending this blog. There just won't be regular posts or longer fics with complex storylines. I've come to the realization, over my 2 month hiatus from writing, that I enjoy writing for K-pop idols in smaller amounts, like with drabbles or reaction-style content with the idols that I currently write for. In simpler terms, after December 1st, I'll be taking a one-month hiatus before posting content that is similar to the slushie prompts and other reactions that I've done in the past.

There's a lot of work that I want to get done to help transition into the phase, and I think you'll find these changes helpful and necessary.

And the easiest, introduce you to @kit-kat-katie 😌 This is my writing blog for other fandoms like the Hunger Games and Obey Me. This blog will also hold any longer-style fics or fics that feature a different writing style than what you might be used to here. (I'm putting up a Ryujin fic in a week or so.... so you should go follow if you wanna see that. 🤭)

Separate and re-vamp my rules for writing and my navigation page. It's an absolute train wreck right now, and the end goal is to make it user-friendly to me and to you.

Revamp the masterlist - again, mostly because I think I'm about to hit the link limit on mobile for the Dreamcatcher page, but it also needs some fixing up, plus I want to add some more groups to the main masterlist.

Add more groups and soloists to the masterlist - this is just me needing to sort through variety content for these groups, but if you're curious, here are the groups. (Aespa, New Jeans, IVE, Somi, Eunbi, and more to come, probably.)

Re-open requests. This should be the last and final thing I need to do for this blog. I'm going send out a post when I do, and I'll be encouraging requests to help me finish the slushie prompts since that'll be my goal for 2024. 🥰

Revamp @archive-of-queens - This blog was supposed to be about archiving this blog, but since I'm no longer doing that, it'll serve as a graveyard to all the ideas that never came to life. I just need to fix the intro post, and then I can start to release the content that's been sitting there for a while.

I also need to overhaul the WIP page, but that'll happen in that one-month hiatus.

I'm so excited to start a new era - an era that will be less stressful on me but still provide quality content for you all. I will not be missing the schedule of the WIP that I currently have 🫣 so I'm hoping that having more freedom with less time constraints can help the creativity flow more. ❤️ Thank you for being along for the ride, and I'm so happy that you all will hopefully choose to stay with me for what's to come.

Thank you for a great two years, and here's to next year. 💗

#2 years is nuts tbh #but I am glad you all have stuck with me for this long #announcement #katie talks

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ggidolsmuts · 1 year

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You can have your dream poly relationship with any three celebrities of your choice, who do you pick?

Ooh spicy!

Knee jerk reaction is Yubin, Seulgi, Jiu.

Wildly jerking reaction is SinB, Eunbi, Yein

Random combo that would be fun is WooAh Nana, Yeonwoo, Sejeong. Also an actress combo I guess lol

Thanks for the fantasy man XD

#asks

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hwangbiz · 2 years

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WINTER TASK

Scenario 3: There’s always whispering in the industry. Chatter that says false information or rude comments about your idol and their fellow peers. Unfortunately, they overhear a conversation that they shouldn’t. What will be their reaction? Walk away? Speak up for themselves?

Last summer seemed like a lifetime ago. The first time that Hwang Eunbi had seen the BPM building, she’d felt an overwhelming sense of nostalgia mixed with regret. She’d remembered the first time she’d seen the Source Music building and of course, at that time, Source hadn’t had any money and she was just a trainee. No one knew who she was and barely anyone knew what Source was either and despite the fact that she didn’t know where her career would go from there, she had been satisfied that she was still working hard towards her dream. That was not the same as this. She was an adult now, not some scrawny 16-year-old with precise coordination and an attitude so disciplined that she’d sometimes forgotten to let herself have fun, and BPM was as small as Source had been back then but BPM had money. A set of wealthy men worked together to take experienced idols and give them the treatment they deserved. This was what she needed. It was a second chance to do things without regret, but again, that seemed like a lifetime ago. Last winter and this winter, she felt like two completely different people.

As she leaned against the stainless steel banister of the glass-wrapped porch she looked out onto the streets of Seoul. Despite being wrapped in a fuzzy winter coat, her body felt slightly warm. That was because of the fact that she’d just gotten done trying to dance out her frustrations and been left unsatisfied. She’d tried everything so far to clear her mind: binging Netflix, visiting with her family, playing with Ankko, and even spending extra time in the gym. Dance was her last resort but instead of clearing her mind, it only made the thoughts swirling in her head, even worse. When Yuna had pulled her aside at the Winter Gala to give her a soft interrogation about her best friend, she’d thought nothing of it, at first, but now, it consumed her. If anyone were to be able to tell what Eunbi’s hidden feelings were, it would be one of her members, right? Five people knew her better than anyone on earth, and Yuna was one of them. Yuna had crossed her mind that day, too, when she’d arrived at BPM. They’d done so much together as GFriend. There was a part of Eunbi that didn’t know who she was an idol without the “SinB” being followed by a “of Yeojachingu” because, after six years, it became her life, and then, boom, it was taken from her just like that. Even without the title of a group, though, they were still family. Sowon who acted in the role of a concerned mother trying so hard to get Eunbi to behave despite knowing that she didn’t listen. Yerin who was her best friend. A friendship so intense, they wrote a song about each other. Her partner in crime. Eunha who had known her since long before they ever reached Source or were in a group together. Her soulmate who never left her side. Yuna who would put up with the petty argument that Eunbi started with her just for jokes and always entertained her when she came up with silly ideas. Yewon who in all her quiet glory was powerful and strong in ways that people didn’t realize, reminded her of a Disney princess and was funnier than most people would ever get the pleasure of knowing. The five of them were her sisters. She’d gotten to stay with Yewon and Eunha, at least, and she was thankful for that, but still, sometimes, she felt like something had been stolen from her. The life she’d become accustomed to was taken from her and she’d had little to no say in it. Maybe it was just about how hard change was. At the end of the day, no matter how it had ended, even if they were all still at the same company together now, it would feel different. It would have changed. Everything changes in the end.

Even friendships change. As she closed her eyes and slid down with her back against the glass wall, her face pressed into its cool surface seeking some release from her body’s overheating from exertion. She could practically see the joy and shock on Yuju’s face as she thought of that moment. She’d been inside drinking champagne, which she knew nearly nothing about but had been learning from Jimin, and having the time of her life. She always did when she was with him and apparently, it hadn’t gone unnoticed. She’d thought Yuju was in trouble and that there was some sort of emergency but when she’d emerged from the glamoured hotel ballroom, it turned out that she was the one in an emergency. Everything her older friend had said seemed like a blur in hindsight. Yuju had been watching them like a hawk all night so far and although Eunbi had caught her a few times, she didn’t think anything of it. That was until her friend had asked if she and Jimin were finally together. Finally. That word… Had this been something that Yuna was waiting for? Eunbi had been so confused and blindsided that she’d just chalked it up to her friend being silly. The two of them and the rest of their members always laughed about the rumours of them dating their good friends. Eunbi and Moonbin. Umji and Seungkwan. Sowon and Jeonghan. They’d been asked about it in interviews before and her answer was always the same. It’s not impossible for men and women to be friends. That was the resolution they always told interviewers and it was true. Being in the idol industry since she was a child meant that she had plenty of friends, men and women, who also became idols and debuted following their dreams just like she did. It didn’t mean that she was dating any of them, but with this one…a small part of Eunbi understood. She’d known about the rumour of Jimin dating a GFriend member that had been going around for an unreasonable amount of time and dating her best friend surely wasn’t the worst rumour going around about her.

Eunbi had heard all sorts of things said behind her back. It was almost always by people who didn’t actually know any of the girls very well but she’d heard people call her names, assume that she must be rude because of her facial expressions, and even some people say that she’s not as talented as people hyped her up to seem. She’d always been a person of strong conviction, though. She didn’t care what others thought. What mattered most was if she was satisfied with herself and she was. At least, she thought that she was. She’d had that dark period for a few years but redebuting had pulled her right out of that. Of course, when she thought back on that dark period, those who knew her best made it easy to rely on them. Even if she didn’t believe in herself, she had them cheering for her and she felt like she could do anything because of it. The rumours usually never mattered to her. This was different, though, because it didn’t feel wholly untrue. If it was just a rumour amongst staff, then it would be different, but it was her own eonnie who pulled her aside and asked if the date between she and Jimin was a romantic one and after that, she’d been so conflicted that she’d wanted some sort of confirmation and so she’d gone to her favourite stylist.

When they’d left Source Music, they didn’t take any staff with them, no, but some people had come voluntarily. That was how close they’d become with their stylists. They felt like a part of an extended family, too. Saying goodbye to them had been one of the most difficult things to do but they’d been presently surprised to see some of them at BPM when they’d started working there, too. It was a few days after the gala and they had schedules to film a present for Christmas for Na.v. Eunbi, who never normally got up early, had snuck out of the dorm before anyone could see her. She’d practically begged one of their managers to get her to the venue earlier than Eunha and Umji so she could have time alone with the staff. Her excuse of taking her role as interim leader seriously and wanting to know what went on behind the scenes before the girls’ arrived was so easy to see through but the older woman hadn’t called her out on it and instead just told her what time to meet in front of the dorm. She needed to know the truth about this rumour and where it had come from and more than that, she wanted so badly to hear someone else say that it was silly so that she wouldn’t have to face the reality of the feelings that had been hiding in the back of her mind since she’d first heard of it a few days prior.

The moment that she’d climbed out of the van, she’d made a beeline for hair and makeup. Her little furlined crocs smacked against the pavement but when she’d reached the door, she was stopped in her tracks. She heard her own name, and at first, she thought that she’d simply been spotted by their stylist but as she neared the dressing rooms, she realized that everyone inside had their backs turned. She knew better, usually, than to listen in on conversations that didn’t belong to her but her brain had been so scrambled for the past couple of days that she was almost desperate to hear something that would confirm her suspicions, even if it meant only hearing the tail half of statements made about her.

“-announced that they’ll be doing their military service soon. You know how much she hates being alone,”

Military service? They couldn’t be talking about BTS…right? There was no way they were talking about Jimin. Yuju had imagined what she’d said to Eunbi. She was sure of it.

“She’s not alone, though. She has Yewon and Eunha and she has us,”

The uplifting positive voice behind that statement was exactly the stylist she’d come to speak to.

“I’m only concerned because of how long their relationship has been.”

“We don’t even know that they are dating for a fact.” “Isn’t it obvious? She practically had stars in her eyes watching him during their return to music shows this year,”

“Lots of women have stars in their eyes when they look at Park Jimin,”

“Not the way that she does. She looks at him like she’s in love,”

There it was. Eunbi stood up straight and cleared her throat making her presence known as she pushed the door open. She was good at putting on a brave face. It was her talent. That was why she’d been able to go on with the rest of her day acting like nothing had happened and she hadn’t heard anything. It worked for her until they’d gotten home and then, she’d fallen apart so easily. She had thrown herself on the bed, buried her body under the covers and sat thinking for longer than just a while. She’d even told Jimin they’d had to cancel their plans that day which only made the situation all too real when she realized that canceling felt like she was missing something immensely. The worst part of all of this is that Jimin was the person she would usually talk to about things like this but she just couldn’t. Not this time. She would have to tell him eventually, sure, but it wasn’t fair to try and navigate this with him while her feelings weren’t clear to her.

She rolled over, determined to find a resolution to this new information, and pulled out her phone.

“Okay,” she said looking over at Ankko. The pup had been there for just a few days as they’d had fewer public schedules and more rehearsals. It was a good chance to see her. “I’m going to sit here and I’m going to look through my phone objectively like…from another person’s point of view, you know? Just to see if this is the phone of Park Jimin’s girlfriend,”

She knew it was somewhat ridiculous to talk to her pet but thinking out loud was really helpful sometimes and she was further encouraged by the fact that Ankko left her place to come lay next to Eunbi. She held her phone high above her face careful to keep a good grip on it as she rested on her back. Eunbi had flings before, yes, but never a real relationship so she wasn’t even sure where to start in deciding if this was truly something to be concerned about. She decided to begin with her camera roll first.

Surely if there were any weight to this rumour, there would be some evidence of it there. She’d taken plenty of videos and pictures with Jimin. Of course, a lot of that leaned heavily on their hobby of learning dances together or teaching each other what they knew when it came to the videos but the pictures were just things Eunbi took when they hung out. They were only in her phone and Jimin’s as they’d never dare break the carefully constructed barrier between their friendship and the real world but Eunbi loved taking pictures and documenting memories. She and Jimin had a lot of memories, that was for sure.

She scrolled to the very top of her camera roll. Pictures the two of them had taken together at one of the schedules that BTS and Gfriend had around the time of her group’s debut. She remembered how hard she’d laughed that day, having to pretend like they weren’t as close as they were for the sake of avoiding scandal. Back then, they’d only been friends for a few years but they’d known each other for at least ten years. He was one of the very few people able to see past her pouty demeanor during her trainee days and even though, he was struggling with his own things independently, he’d gone out of his way to befriend her and help her. When it came to dancing, they were both perfectionists and what she lacked in ability when it came to having the smooth and flowy movements needed for Gfriend, he had gained from years of contemporary. Alternatively, BTS had debuted with a hip-hop concept and that was her specialty. They balanced each other out and as it turned out, it wasn’t just in dance, either. It was no secret that Eunbi had a slight reputation for being a little cold around her trainee days and while she was always kind to other idol hopefuls, she was intimidating to them, too. She was well aware of it. She rarely ever cried or complained or showed any feelings besides discipline or her sarcastic joking playfulness. No one would know how hard she always was on herself in private or how many times she’d have privately convinced herself not to give up. Jimin, of course, was the opposite. He was the type of person to show his feelings freely. Eunbi, over time with her own group, had learned to be less guarded with her emotions, too, but as she looked at the old photo, all she could think of was how opposite they had been back then.

She couldn’t help but think of how many milestones there were in her life since they’d met. Even in just the past three years, it felt like her life had been whipped up in a whirlwind and then changed. They’d been at the same company and then her group had disbanded and all of the self-hatred that she’d felt since Fever era had come crashing down on her. All of those times that she’d watched herself on the monitors and wanted to do everything over and over because it wasn’t good enough. It wasn’t perfect enough. Those feelings that she’d been afraid to share with her members. They were emotions that she had to hold close to her heart because she didn’t feel that anyone would understand. Who could understand being told that you’re beautiful and talented every single day but still hating seeing yourself perform? She’d felt so…ridiculous and absurd. Even people who didn’t know much about Gfriend agreed that she was one of the best dancers of their generation of Kpop but those things were hard to listen to when she wasn’t satisfied with her own performance. And who exactly was she to say all of this to? She couldn’t share it with Buddy. After all the times that she’d told them that it was important to love themselves first, she would sound like a hypocrite. After all of the times that she’d confidently called herself pretty, even recently, she felt like a fraud back then and it had taken the disbandment and Viviz to wake her up. It had taken those events to make her realize that even after years, she was doing well and not only was she doing well but she was doing what she wanted to do. She was living a dream that an eight-year-old Eunbi would hardly be able to believe now. Through all of those events, if she really thought about it, he’d been there for her. Even when things were hard for them both, they’d always supported each other, but…dating?

Even just laying here looking through her photo gallery, her eyes began welling up with tears as the realization started to hit her. She’d had flings before but never anything serious. She’d never been able to get fully emotionally invested in anyone. In her mind, it has always been because she’d been so busy with Gfriend activities and then with Viviz but…the more she thought about it that couldn’t have been true. After all, she was emotionally invested in the friends she’d made, in her group members, and even in Ankko. She hummed as she looked over at the pup who nuzzled her face closer to Eunbi’s neck. Eunbi chuckled and gave the white furball a pat on the head before turning back to her phone. She pressed the button and the screen turned black before she chucked it halfway across her bed.

“Ankko…could it be that this entire time we’ve been dating and I just didn’t realize?” she furrowed her brows at the thought. “In that case, poor Jimin oppa. His girlfriend doesn’t even kiss him,”

She let out a loud laugh which startled the dog on her chest but she couldn’t help it. The thought was silly. She was sure, now, that if she didn’t know then neither did he. They were close friends and they did the things that close friends normally did with each other. They spoke about their troubles and helped each other when it was necessary. They were just being kind to each other…right? For a relationship, romantic feelings…of love were necessary.

It was then that it was brought back to her mind. Before Yuna had ever uttered a word of the idea of Eunbi and Jimin dating…she’d felt it. She’d felt it and she’d so easily dismissed it because she wasn’t sure what it meant, but…hadn’t she felt her cheeks practically burst into flames when he’d told her that she’d look pretty the night of the Gala and the sensation of her own heart swelling in her chest when she realized how nice they looked together. Those weren’t feelings that someone felt for a friend. Her fingers ghosted up to her lips and brushed over them slightly remembering how they’d met his cheek that night. Something small and not unusual for them…but significant to her at that moment and she hadn’t been able to figure out why. How was she supposed to know if she loved someone if she’d never known before? Was it when you missed that person even when they were with you? When you wished that you could be around them all the time? When you knew your life would be so much worse without them than with them? When you smiled simply thinking of them? When tears came to your eyes at the idea of being away from them for long? When they came to your mind every time you saw the smallest thing related to them? When seeing them happy made you happy? When you felt a deep sense of warmth and safety with them? Maybe…when you knew that you wanted them to be in your life for as long as they were willing…

She felt all of those things for Jimin and more. It would be a risk telling him so…in case, all of this…everything the stylists said and what she was thinking…if it was all just in her head. She’d be breaking her own heart...but she owed it to herself to move on if it wasn’t true and she could only know it if she told him. She sat up grabbed her phone and with her fingers clutched tightly around it…she placed the call without hesitation.

#seoulesstask2022 #shout out to may and becs for helping me with this T___T #∘⡊ ❥ ˚⊹ｍｕｓｉｎｇｓ⊹ — ↳ ❝ ᵗᶤᵐᵉ ᵗᵒ ˢᵃʸ ᵍᵒᵒᵈᵇʸᵉ ᵃᶰᵈ ᵍᵒ ᵈᵒʷᶰ ❞#you wouldnt believe it but this is the short version

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