#even if i live like 20 mins away by train

[appalachy]

I miss portugal so much its almost disgusting sometimes

[honelle56]

Mpreg hc: dream is on a mission to buy every single pregnancy and parenting book available but he gets way too overwhelmed to actually sit down and read them so george helps him make an excel sheet with the important parts of each book and then they read for 20 min together every night

Let's jump on the mpreg train, shall we? Small drabble:

“Dream, you know I love you a whole lot, but this is getting ridiculous.” George stared at the dozens of books stockpiled on their coffee table. He could’ve sworn that there was already a visible dent in the table from where the books have been amassing over the past few weeks, ever since he took that pregnancy test.

“Huh?” Dream asked when he came back from answering the door. Presumably to accept another order of books if the big box in his hands was anything to go by.

“When do you even want to read all of these? You are aware that the baby is going to be here in six months, and I sincerely hope that you did not plan on spending every single second until then reading every book there is about pregnancy and babies.”

Dream visibly paled at that, letting go of the box and starting to pace through the living room. “You are right, fuck. Six months is not enough time to figure out everything I need to know. Maybe I can learn to read faster? Or- or I could start listening to audiobooks while reading, you know, multi-tasking. And maybe the baby will arrive later, giving us some more time, do you think you can hold them in for a bit longer? I am sure-“

“Dream.” George interrupted, getting up from his perch on the couch to stop his spiraling husband. “Sit down with me?”

Dream still seemed restless but after taking a deep breath he followed George to the couch and sat down next to the smaller who was cupping his small baby bump.

“What is this about, honey?”

Tears filled Dream’s eyes at George’s soft voice. “I-” he tried, willing himself to not freak out. This was George, his husband, soulmate, he wouldn’t run away over some insecurities.

“I guess I am scared to mess this up. I feel like I am flying a plane without a license and blindfolded and I am terrified of being a bad Dad, so I guess I just want to know everything there is to know before the baby gets here. But there is so much to learn, and I don’t think I will ever be fully ready for this.”

Gentle hands cupped his cheeks, willing him to look at George who looked at him with eyes so soft they could only be described as lovestruck. A soft kiss was pressed onto the tip of his nose.

“Thank you for telling me. For what it is worth I think you will be the best Dad, simply because you have a heart so big that I know this kid will be the most loved baby to have ever been born. And yes, we will probably mess up but then we will learn and improve. These books can only teach us so much, I fear the rest will just be learning by doing.”

Dream chuckled, softly caressing George’s belly. He couldn’t wait until he could finally feel them.

“If it makes you feel better, let’s make a deal. Let’s math this out.” George proposed. “No more books. Today we look through the ones we already have and find the important parts. We plan for 20 minutes every evening where we read something about pregnancy and babies. Then we can make an Excel sheet and plan what to read in which order and when.”

Dream didn’t think he could love this man any more than he already did if he tried but every day, he proved him wrong. He would never understand how George just got his brain better than he did himself, but it was in situations like this that he would be forever thankful that they had found each other in this world.

“Let’s do it.” He smiled, pressing a kiss to George's forehead and grabbing two books for them to skip through.

[alloveydovey]

Hellooooo, dramas from this past month :) I had a lot of fun watching most of these, which hadn't been happening lately.

The Story of Park’s Marriage Contract, 2023 (kdrama) 7.5/8

A woman from the past travels to the future where she meets a man who resembles her deceased husband. In need of a wife, he strikes a contract with her, and blah blah blah, you know what happens next.

The chemistry was there 100%, the comedy too, but overall, I think it was just a mid watch for me. I was three episodes away from finishing but was struggling big time because I was getting bored.

The Romance of Tiger and Rose, 2020 (cdrama) 8

A scriptwriter ends up inside her own creation as a side character who dies early on in the drama and has a really bad reputation.

This was hilarious. Laughing out loud alone type of hilarious. It didn't make any sense at all, and it was extremely silly and sometimes even frustrating, but both actors were so great with the comedy (Zhao Lusi the actress that you are), so everything was just fun and romantic and cute... and weird enough, emotional af as well. I love these types of dramas where, after watching, you kinda feel empty inside lol. Comfort drama material? 100%

My Demon, 2023/24 (kdrama) 8

A demon becomes powerless after crossing paths with a cold heiress (who he obviously knew in their, guess what? Yes, past lives)

Kim Yoo Jung and Song Kang (his character is everything) were so cute in this! Their chemistry was definitely chemistring. I loved the concept and all, but for some reason, I couldn’t put my whole heart into this drama, which resulted in me being a bit disappointed. I’d get bored sometimes. I still don’t know if it’s my problem though. Maybe it wasn't the right time to watch it since I had been watching so many dramas with similar storylines. I’ll give them this, though, these two were truly a comedic duo™️

My Man is Cupid, 2023/24 (kdrama) 8

A love fairy accidentally shoots himself with an arrow and ends up in love with a human, condemning him and his group of cupids to 500 years on Earth. In modern day, he gets entangled with a veterinarian who might be connected to what happened in the past. Also! Murder mystery.

This one just goes to prove that liking a drama is all about vibes for me. Is this different from what I’ve been watching? Nope. It’s not better than the other ones above with similar premises. Yet somehow, unlike the others, it got my attention way more, and I totally binged it. Even when this particular one had some very confusing, probably so-so writing, moments. Granted, it has Nana in it. Nana makes everything worth it (Jang Dong Yoon was cute as well lol).

My Girlfriend is a Gumiho, 2010 (kdrama) (rewatch!) 7.5 ⭐️

A cute gumiho saves an irresponsible rich kid who wants to become an action star by giving him her bead. Both of them gotta stick together while he heals.

Like I said back when I first saw this, COMFORT!! And I was in the mood for something silly and sweet after the same themes over and over again. I can't get over how cute Shin Min A and Lee Seung Gi are in this.

Falling Into You, 2022 (cdrama) 9

A student-athlete wants to do high jump but doesn't have the required height for the sport, so a postgraduate student-coach decides to take him under her wing and train him. Noona love story ensues.

So... I have a lot of mixed feelings about it because, all in all, I think this is one of the best cdramas I've watched. It's beautifully shot, the music is incredible, and the pacing, story, characters, and acting are all impeccable. Aside from Meet Yourself (fav ever) it's truly one of the most naturally acted cdramas I've seen so far as well. Even outside the romance part, everything was really good.

Now, was it inappropriate? For me, at least, I think it was. This young student is supposed to be 20, and his coach is said to be about to turn 28. They are both consenting adults (let's put it that way), but the power dynamics thing is still there. Overall, it was a nice surprise, and I completely binged it.

Welcome to Samdal-ri, 2023/24 (kdrama) 9

After a scandal, a famous photographer runs back to her hometown. Her ex, with whom she had an intense fallout (childhood friends to lovers), is there, and it seems like neither of them has moved on. (Also about family, and grief)

From the moment I saw Shin Hye Sun and Ji Chang Wook's pictures next to one another on a tweet saying they were going to be in a new drama together, I knew this was going to be a 10/10 in my books. Maximized joint slay. Add the hometown cha cha cha vibes, and you have an amazing tear-jerker drama. The rest of the cast is a great complement as well; their acting and their stories just make everything really emotional (I cried a lot lol), but it is 100% worth the watch. I'll be honest about one thing, though. As much as I loved it, it took me a while to finish the last two episodes cause I feel like they dragged the story a bit.

Princess Hours/Goong, 2006 (kdrama) 8

In a reimagined modern SK, a girl from an ordinary family gets hitched to the crown prince because of a promise both of their grandparents made in the past. A Diana x Charles x Camilla drama ensues (but like, with a happy ending).

This is what I like to call DRAMA™️. The type you hate everyone's behaviors, and you laugh, and you hate the ML, but you also want him to get with the FL, and you start hate watching, and then you giggle when they share moments and completely forget ML is a really shitty person lol. I started this cause I got sick, and I got way into it. ML being a major asshole and the FL having no self-respect (like the good old dramas and telenovelas) aside, I enjoyed binging this, and I can see why it was so popular. Their romance, though deeply flawed and a product of the time the drama was made, had some great moments, slow burn and natural as well. I was lowkey hoping for a happier ending, tho, but it was cute enough. Also, music bro, that main song is never getting out of my head. Comfort drama material: 100%

Playful Kiss, 2010 (kdrama) 5

FL confesses to ML, and he rejects her harshly. When her house collapses, her father moves them in with an old friend, who ends up being ML's father.

So after Goong, I thought I'd probably be able to watch this. Wrong. Shin's got nothing wrong in comparison so Seung Jo. Seung Jo is probably my most disliked ML ever lol. I binged this, hoping it'd get better, or just like Shin in Goong, he'd change a bit after getting together with FL. But nope, he remained an asshole throughout the whole thing. Gotta love that consistency. Comfort drama material: 1% (I saw the comments on Viki, and I don't know how people rewatched this, lol.)

[artemisbarnowl]

What is life like in Melbourne? I’m looking into moving there from the UK and would love some insights and whatever else from people who live and work there 💕

I've only visited the UK briefly as a tourist so I'm not sure how to compare them in a way that's going to give you useful info. But I'll give you info at least. Please sit comfortably and we'll begin.

Melbourne has 5 million people in it, but is also quite a large sprawling urban area, so it doesn't feel really packed and busy. It sits on a bay, so it doesn't get freezing but does have the '4 seasons in one day' jokes which are true. I never really got in the habit of checking the weather in the morn before I left for work until I moved away from melb where the forecast was such that I could dress appropriately without surprise.

When I talk about what I love about Melbourne I mean inner suburbs and CBD (which is a beautiful grid and shining example of urban planning for the now that is weighed down by no plans for the future). Public transport connectivity is decent (comparable to London imo) but wait times, delays, and travel times on trams and buses might be relatively crap depending on your experience. It's no Moscow metro (my beloved), but you can probably get to where you're going somehow. Also e scooters have popped off. Further out there's no trams and there's more big gaps between train stations (the train lines are arranged like spokes of a wheel around a central city circle. There will be another city loop slightly overlapping the current one in service next year). This is what I despairingly call The Suburbs. Where you probably need a car to get around and it's like at least 20 mins drive to Anywhere for dinner, groceries or fun activities. Mostly Melbourne is not overly hilly so bikes are an option but infrastructure such as bike lanes is really hit or miss depending on area. Especially good in the inner north. Melb inner suburbs are very walkable and I love love love that. I lived in the inner north and could walk into the CBD to do whatever.

In terms of culture things I think Melbourne is the most international of Aus's capitals in that it has a lot of different people but also that there's a lot open late. Sydney probably can and will make the same claim. But that's it. The rest of Aus is a country town. Major shops will probably close 5.30 or six mon to wed but there's plenty of stuff that's open later. You can always find a bar* or 8. There's plenty of different cuisines in gourmet or fast food dining. There's a cafe in the CBD that's open 24 hours where I can sit outside and have a pot of green tea WHENEVER I WANT. Bookstores open til 10pm. There are lots of events throughout the year and lots of cultural institutions to visit on a whim for free! Some are paid also obvi but I find it difficult to be bored when I can go to the museum to see taxidermy or the NGV for art for free whenever. I am a zoo member which means I get to hang out in a beautiful park/garden which creatures for free whenever I want. Again as you go out further this becomes less true. Fringe cities at the ends of train lines are likely to have what you need to live but less fun activities less often. Not nothing though!

Melbournians really do love wearing black. Especially in winter. They also love strategic Grey. I thought people were exaggerating until I left. A head to toe black outfit is uncommon enough to be remarkable where I live now. Even in a regular boring office where people wear very muted colours I'm the only one who does it. There is no functional difference between the a mourning outfit and one of a Melbournian. it's common wear sneakers with a lot of seemingly formal or corporate outfits, but not thongs with jeans. That's some weird Sydney nonsense.

Being around the bay there's plenty of places to swim in summer! Most of the bay is bordered by beach, most famous and reachable from the city is St Kilda beach. Which is excellent and beyond reproach if you're not Australian and 'fine' if you are. Traveling down towards Mornington Peninsula they get better. 5km makes a difference to the grain of the sand. Some are more fine, can get more coarse and shelly as well. Never stony. Only a little bit of seaweed here and there.

There are parks in the heart of the city (nothing huge like Hyde though) and little wildlife corridors or reserves in most suburbs but it's not an especially Nature city. It's only one hour by train and bus or by car to the Dandenongs (a low mountain range, not to be confused with hugely underated immigrant suburb of Dandenong in melb) though which have cool temperate rainforest national park, lots of gardens (huuuuuge rhododendron garden up there), little b&bs, english style cafes (miss Marples in Olinda is the most famous) and lots of walking and biking. I say one hour but Melbourne as an area reaches right to the base of the range, which is why you can get a bus from the shops. There are national parks that are native woodland or grasslands closer to the heart of the city but these are less special to me because that's the standard nature I see every day of my life. There's a pink lake in south melb which is fun. But I love tree ferns and fresh damp dirt and the tallest flowering trees in the world!!

If you have more specific Q's feel free to ask. I am a city gal at heart but did live rurally originally and frequently do short stays (2 weeks to a month) in rural or remote areas so I am used to comparing amenities and connectivity.

*Melbourne has regular bars but also is very big on rooftop bars. Sydney has some, but other cities hear rooftop bar and think 'bar inside but with views or on top floor of building. Probably formal'. Melbourne roof top bars are on the roof. In the open air (maybe some shade sail) and it's very much a casual thing. Jugs of beer or sangria, chips, feels like a good barbeque rather than a refined cocktail bar. Those are often in basements.

[minquiec]

Jia's MJ

Tbh, with full clearance, I haven't read a lick of spiderman comics (except for like hobies one but that's a different story) which in hindsight makes me look like such a faker but OH WELL I CANT BE BOTHERED AND THE TINY TEXT IS TOO HARD MY MY BLIND ASS TO READDDD also it seems complicated and my brain is too dumb so idk the parallels or anything so 🔥🔥 just lemme bullsh my way thru this please (like I always do)

First of all I just wanna say

She is so fine OEUGH

Also idk if anyone notice the tattoo is a mini easter egg for the gr+s au (grim reaper and swallow it's too long to keep repeating I swear)

Anyways I haven't decided what her full name is I just know alot of people call her Mei and especially if they're younger than her call her Mei Jie (Jie means older sister in chn so it becomes mj HAHAHA BIG BRAIN WAVELENGTH)

Mei has this tattoo parlour in one of the more quieter streets of New Yan and Jia knows her vaguely prior to The Fire™ bc it's like maybe 20 mins away from her apartment and she was doing her spider girl things and beating crime. EITHER WAY she knows abt it.

I was thinking abt what her personality was like and then at one point I was like 🧍🧍I feel like I'm just ripping off hb's and watering it down ARGH cause what I was thinking is that Mei's someone who's clear in what beliefs she has. It's kind of a my life my choice kinda thing. So basically head strong, confident and kinda stoic sort of gal. And then the watering down gets even worse CAUDE I WANTED HER TO LIKE HELP JIA BY HOUSING HER TEMPORARILY AFTER THE FIRE HAPPENED?? BUT THEN I WAS LIKE ISNT THAG JUST HOBIE SND GWEEENNNN❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓ ARGH EHERE R MY ARTISTIC LIBERTIES THIS IS SO CRUNGE defaming my own name smh 😞😞 but like it makes more sense why jia would like hb if this happened bc she would've been subconsciously subjected to this type of personality prior to meeting him ❓ she also thinks mei is so cool in the way she carries herself so it would make sense for jia to like these personality traits ig

Also my favorite trait abt her is the crane motif (animal symbolism my beloved) cause I thinkkkk one of the things cranes symbolise is wisdom and in some form, Mei offers her own wisdom to jia after her having lost everything during her stay at Mei's. So TRULY SHE LIVING UP THE THE OLDER SIS IN HER NAME

Anyyays I might update this as usual if anything else comes up cause I can never have one train of coherent thought yippee

[nickgeezyblog]

Rucking Ocala National Forrest

Back in January I attempted Operation Ocala. I made it to mile 45 at the 3rd checkpoint. I thought I could go on after changing my socks, attending to my blisters, but as I got back up I was locked up. I was with 3 others, and we all made it there together and unfortunately, we all dropped like flies at that CP. I never rucked until 2023 or even knew what it really was. My friend did Operation Ocala 23 and I remember following him with his live track and watching some live videos, it was pretty wild. His blisters were knarly. He later got me into rucking later that year and I did a few rucks. My first long ruck we went for 40 overnight but only made it 26.2. I was dead. All with 25lbs dry weight. That was in early December and Operation Ocala was coming fast in mid Jan. I was able to do a few more 20 mile before Ocala and I felt ready. The biggest things I learned from Ocala 24 were that it's all mental. The feet are going to blister, the pain is going to come. The road to the end is longer than you could ever imagine. That day on the way home I couldn’t ever imagine doing that again. My wife picked me up, I could barely walk. Everything hurts. But by the next day or so I was so motivated to get back out there. I was so upset with myself that I had stopped. I know I could have just started moving again work through the pain and get more miles in. Here I am 15 hours into that ruck. It's roughly 8am. I have just enough time to get to the end at 5pm. I had work in the morning. I had a 2 hour drive home. So many things just stacked negatively for me that ending this was the easy way out. 

I found myself wanting to attempt this again right away. I could not wait a whole year. I remember my other friend Josh asking me that he would ruck with me when I posted some of my training activities online. He had been in the Army and he ran and hiked. I asked him if he wanted to do the trail with me soon, and he said yes. 

We set the date for Feb 24-25, 2024. We had 5 weeks to prepare. I go to the gym regularly so I kept my legs trained well. We did 1 ruck together late jan, 20 miles it went well. We found some hot spots and made some changes. I had new shoes. I was trying Altra Lone Peak 8. My issues at Operation Ocala were that my pinky toes were trashed. My pinky toe naturally goes inward towards that next toe and just gets squished. The Lone Peaks, like most Altra, have a wide toe box. I rucked a few 20s and even a marathon before the next attempt. I played around with toe spacers, toe socks, double layer socks...I knew it was going to be an issue. Some things helped but nothing was going to be a solution. I just accepted that going into it. I knew If I can keep my toes decent I can make this. My cardio was fine , I know how to eat and drink etc. It was all feet for me. 

Josh and I met Wednesday before the ruck and figured out where we would drop water off and planned the logistics of getting there and back. The plan was to take both trucks and park his at the finish line which was the end of the Florida Trail. Then we would take my truck and stop at 3 spots approximately 15-21 miles apart. It was more base on access with the trucks we found the easiest highways where the trail intersected. So the route was, start at Fort McCoy, Check point 1 was 18 miles away, Checkpoint 2 was 21 miles away from there, and checkpoint 3 was roughly 15 miles away then like 12-13 more to finish. 

We had to carry all the food with us, and I had extra water at all times since the checkpoints were 5-7 hours apart. I had 4L of water at all times. We chose to leave for Ocala at 730a. This way we did not disturb our natural sleep and we could complete our morning routines. By the time we got to the starting point after all the stops it was 1130. We wanted to start by noon. We started a few min after but close enough.  

My shoes and feet felt good. I had vaseline on the toes, XOSKIN toe socks, a pink toe spacer on the outside, then Dickies thick boot socks over that along with the Altras. All the layers were sitting well, and my feet felt good. I had about 30lbs total on me. A backpack and a hip sack combined. In my backpack water, food, extra clothes, first aid, emergency tent, bear spray, insect repellent, head lamps, back up batteries, electrolytes. In my hip sack I had phone, batteries to charge phone, cords that were ready to go. This way there was no fussing around when trying to charge phone. I had some more food, compass, bear bell, and whistle.  

Weather was perfect. Clear skies, 68 for the high 40s for the low. Light wind. It was gorgeous. Our pace started good. High 17 min miles which was expected for us. Im not a fast rucker, im not a fast runner. Anything sub 18 for me is great. I do from time-to-time shuffle but I chose not to do so on this ruck.  

The first leg was great. I did almost step on a pigmy rattler which made things a little exciting. 

We got to the first check point , you have so much time to play it in your head what you need to check on, fix, charge, etc. It never seems to go as smoothly and it always takes longer. But we got our water refilled, took a quick break and got moving again, It was a 34 min mile combined on that stop, not too bad. 16-17 min break. 

By this time the sun was setting and the next checkpoint was 21 miles so we set out for the next 7 hours. Navigating the Florida Trail is not too bad. I would say it is well marked. We did get lost in January but I had a better map this time and I knew some of the mistakes we made in the past. I did not want to get lost this time. That was one thing that really tired us out . There is a big lake on the trail and it feels like it takes 3 hours to go around, that's because it does. You see a lot of campers around here, but the trail wasn’t really to busy. We passed less than 10 people the entire time. One thing that was helpful for me is knowing the familiar areas. I knew what was coming and it made it like a connect the dots game. It would be like the hike was mentally mapped out in my head. I knew we had to get around the lake, then later there would be a creek crossing, then a sketchier creek crossing , then a board walk etc. That helped me mentally keep going almost as something to look forward to. 

Again, this is mostly mental. This is what got me here. Do hard things. The mind and body are limitless to some extent. You choose what you can and cannot do. The body will persuade you but the mind is the real boss. You go through moments of ups and downs. Filled with doubts, regrets, runner's highs, sense of pride etc. Pain comes and goes. You think you have something brewing on your feet and then it will work itself out. I tried my best not to mess with my feet, but at CP2 I did a sock change just on the boot socks and I took off the toe spacers. I had some hotspots for sure but was not ready to dive into that.  

The night was probably my favorite part. The weather was cooler, no sun heating up your skin. It’s quiet other than some music I was playing. I think I went from Eminem to country to classic rock back to Eminem then death cab for cutie. I was all over the place but it all helped. There were some parts of night and day where I was so into the music I think I was dancing a singing along, im sure me being delirious helped. 

I mentioned food and drink earlier. Here is some more details. I drank 2L of water 4 hours. In the water were 2 packs of Gator Lyte. Plenty of sodium mag and potassium. I'm not crazy about Gatorade but the Gator Lyte drinks and powders are perfect for me. 

I ate every hour. Protein bars like Gatorade bars, and METrx bars. Swedish fish sugary gummies hit the spot, some pop tarts, and I saved a bag of skittles for the last few miles. I don’t normally eat that crap so It was a nice treat. According to my Garmin watch i burned over 7000 calories and I ate close to 5000 I think. 

I did have a chest strap on too for more accurate heart rate monitoring. Garmin is great for these activities. I cycle, run, ruck, etc. and Garmin is great at tracking all of that. I did use Strava for the map portion. I downloaded a friend that actually completed Ocala24 map and that was extremely helpful. Thank you Clint.  

As the sun rises it’s always a great feeling. We were over the hump. We encountered a burning forest at one point in the night. Not sure if it was prescribed but it was very odd to see these trees burning at night with significant flames. There are so many different areas that you cover. Miles of pine trees over hills you can see for so far, scrub oaks and brush where you can’t see but right in front of you, and everything in between. There were overall many prescribed burns that had just happened so you could see more than normal. Not much wildlife though, not sure if that was good or bad. Many deer tracks not no deer.  

One of my highlights of the night was making it to the spot I quit at in January on Mile 45. It was a dirt road. I told Josh to take a picture of me, I flicked off the camera, had a sense of pride and continued on. I was now going into an uncharted trail for me. 

The morning started great. We made it through the night I was trying to do the math and thought we would finish around 11am. 23 hours total. After the sunrise excitement settled down reality was starting to set in. We were slowing down. I was going as fast as I could but overall, it was about 2 solid min slower and that number was growing. My feet were starting to sting. My shins were in pain. My shoulders were tired. My back had blisters from the pack that were not going away anytime soon. My hip sack was rubbing into my legs. Everything was breaking down as expected. I went into this knowing that it was going to be hard and painful. I did not think that if I prepared good nothing bad would happen. That's where I went south the first time. I was prepared this time to embrace the suck. And that's just what I had to do the last 4 hours. Those last 4 hours 12-14 miles or so were hard. Josh was hurting as well. I had the map and I could see the finish line but I made one small mistake. The Strava trail I downloaded was 66 . 63 miles so I was using that number as the finish line. Strava and Garmin must calculate the miles differently. I did not know this so when you are mentally preparing for that finish line you give it your all. Everything you have but that finish line was further than I was preparing for and I didn’t realize this until the last 5 or 6 miles. We were crushed by now and knowing we had to go further was a lot to digest. I was talking to Josh and myself, or I guess yelling....” This is why we came here , It’s not for the last 60 miles, It's for these last 3 or 4” Everything slowed down. Our pace was hitting 23 min miles. About 5 min slower per mile than how we started. Add that to 4 or 5 miles and it's an additional half hour. Things were just stacking up negatively for us. We ran into some hikers, so we knew the trail head was closer. I asked them how far they had been hiking and they said about an hour or so, someone said 2.9 miles...So we finally knew what we had left. If it took them an hour with fresh legs, what did that mean for us. 1.5 hours...? Now time was a crunch. I know this was an unofficial attempt but I still wanted to be there within 24 hours. I was getting doubtful. Josh was as bad as me. Just shot mentally and physically. Quitting was not an option.  We had trucks 70 miles apart and no other assistance. We just pushed and pushed. “GO ONE MORE”. I had my son write that on my hand. I knew I would need it. One for step. One more min. One more mile. And so on. I looked at it many times during the ruck. I can’t explain how slow time and miles passed at the end. The last mile took the longest. We were so close about ¼ mile away and I felt something pop between my big toe and the next toe. That area had been tender for a while but the blister popped. HOLY COW It stung. I went from a slow pace to a limp real quick. I am grateful this happened the last ¼ mile and not the last 5 miles. I don’t know what I would have done. We limped on and pushed with everything we had and made it to the trailhead at just over 67 miles in 23.5 hours. I told Josh as we had a few miles left, the pain would go away as soon as we got there. We just have to get there. I told him he was a F**king Badass! I said many will never even attempt something like this. I was just trying to be as positive as I could. Every time I looked at my hand “go one more” (got that from Nick Barre) it would choke me up a little.  

The next few hours we ate some pizza. We must have looked like 2 90-year-olds with walkers coming into the restaurant. We had to drive back to my truck. My feet were rough but not as bad as I thought. It's crazy how much pain and stinging can come from a little blister. I guess your body is really good at telling you to stop. I was mentally prepared for that. I knew what was coming.  

The ride home was long, 2 hours 20 minutes from the Rodman trailhead. My wife and son were waiting for me. Dinner was cooking. I limped in, i could barely move. My wife tore some band aids off my back, and I screamed so loud like I never knew I could scream that loud it hurt so much. Then I iced bathed my feet. Another painful moment. I ate and crawled into bed. My feet and legs were swollen and still are (the next morning) I took the day off of course so that's how I have time to write this. I am moving better today than expected though. I will be fine. Josh is doing good too. He will be fine. We will be fine. It was a big commitment to revisit this quest.  

I can now move on. I will continue to ruck but I like trying new things. Ultra running is something I have in my sights. I have never ran a marathon but I just rucked over 2.5 of them in less than 24 hours. It was equivalent to doing 21 5ks. 

I share all this because we have much more potential than we think. We can do anything. It may not happen all at once but if you want something bad enough you can do it. Long distance really lets you dig deep with yourself. Even during training, I went on 7 –8-hour rucks and you can really work on yourself out there. I call it training but it was still a hobby to me or just a fun Sunday morning. Put in your favorite podcasts or music playlist and just start rucking. It’s a great zone 2 exercise. That helps build endurance and just overall makes you healthier and stronger. The mind gets stronger too. You think the normal day to day challenges will even be a blip on my radar after this? That\s what it's all about. Doing hard things. When you raise that baseline of what is hard, the normal "hard' stuff is a walk in the park. Challenge yourself. Embrace the suck and bring some friends with you to enjoy the ride. 

[lenteur]

random thoughts about strong girl nam soon, episode five (pt 2)

(read more because i always get carried away lol and this post might contain spoilers)

We got the replica of the ahn min hyuk squealing and kicking his feet like a school girl but this time it's nam soon. I find it endearing because it's like seeing a little child falling in love for the first time. She has this genuine look of joy and excitement in her eyes.

The actress playing Ri hwa ja being so good at her job she should get paid even more. I want her to face the consequences of her actions.

Interesting how everyone in the family wants ri hwa ja to pay for her crimes but hwang geum ju is the only one defending her because she believes hwa ja was desperate for a mom. She saw it in nam soon's imposter's eyes. I wonder if it was an act or if she really wanted to have someone to rely on instead of using all means to earn money. Hwa ja does seem desperate for money. I don't remember if it was said or not but she does come from a poor (in terms of money) background so she must have hustled her whole life to get to where she is.

Also the reason she hates nam soon is because she was on the verge of earning A LOT of money and, in the blink of an eye, the money disappeared. Even though i despise her for wanting to kill an innocent woman, I do understand the struggles of not having a lot of money to live a comfortable life. If she got the money before the real nam soon reuniting with her mom, i think she would have lived her life by herself and left like that.

With that said, it doesn't mean ri hwa ja isn't a bad person because she used manipulation and lies to get to where she is. The most horrible part is her manipulating hwang geum ju by giving her the illusion she finally reunited with her daughter after 20 years of being apart. I don't know I'm very torn on her. She's a bad person, let's all agree on that. But i do believe her financial situation plays a big part on why she's behaving that way.

I've said in a previous episode how hwang geum ju seemed to be empathetic because she wanted her daughter back and i was wondering if she'll continue to have empathy for others after she found nam soon. Well, this scene gave me the answer. She's understanding. She knows not everyone is born with a lot of money and she wants to help others as much as she can. She's even extending her hand to ri hwa ja, even though the latter played with her feelings and lied to her. Hwang geum ju's motto is shown in this scene: make the world a better place.

Bread song making poses by the window = cringe but also hilarious. Gives him the image of a newbie ceo, not really knowing how to act with his new acquired wealth. I was wrong, he's just a freak and it's making as uncomfortable as hwang geum ju is right now.

Nice to see some more info on hwa ja's background. An orphan and a gang leader training orphans to do dirty job for him. She's the only woman in the group. That means she's strong and talented at what she does. But it does explain a lot of things and I can understand her better.

The grandma is hilarious in her quest to get her future boyfriend. I just can't get enough of her.

The plot thickens and someone is giving nam in the dr*g without him knowing. It's disguised as a weight loss pill. I hope he doesn't use it but shows it to nam soon or hee sik so they can move quicker on the case.

I see the dr*g gives strength to those who took it but then they d1e right away, which begs the question: what is different about ryu si o that makes him survive when all the other people who took the dr*g d1ed a few days/weeks after?

Interestingly enough nam soon's first thought when meeting the villain (she doesn't know it's him) is to ask him if he's sick. She is worried about him. She really is a good person.

She needs to talk about this to hee sik, tell him how she found someone with superhuman strength just like her.

I see the dr*g doesn't have the same effect on everyone. Some take longer to d1e. The only side effect is the excessive consumption of water. The chief of the diu team is taking a lot longer than the other victims to d1e. Maybe he'll be the one to survive until the end and a guinea pig (ie they'll experiment on him) to find an antidote?

Ooohooo the plot thickens! Nam soon is finally face to face with her impostor. But i don't think she's seen her face so i don't think she'll recognize her.

So happy to see hee sik back on the case.

The next episode seems promising.

I'll give this episode a 10/10 because it gave us a little bit of everything without revealing too much so us spectators want to tune in for the next episode.

[sailsonthehorizon]

Calculating a 1:6 incline using pandas

And sharing my first attempt at an accessible short break.

Film photography disclaimer / confession: I did take my Pentax MV with a 36 exp roll of colour film. Am absolutely gutted as it was clearly loaded incorrectly - thankfully I did take a few - but not many - iPhone snaps so will be using these for this post. Onwards and sideways.

This is my first blog that addresses the subject of disability. I am a little nervous about sharing this — perhaps because I am still in denial that this is happening to me - but I have found similar blogs very helpful on a personal level. So, if for no other reason than it might help someone else, let’s give it a shot.

We travelled by train from Darlington up to Edinburgh, and the journey is now known as Hell on a Stick #1. I booked seats in Coach G, and whilst I was vaguely aware of an app called Passenger Assistance it didn’t occur to me to use it. I suppose like many in a similar position, I assumed that was for folks with poorer mobility. Forgetting I wasn’t exactly Tigger myself. 

Our train was PACKED, as the previous train was cancelled. No seats, no help, and no Coach G. We finally ended up on random seats separated from each other (after standing for 30 minutes, a mighty dang long time for me these days). Can’t help but think that if I’d used the app, I would have at least had some help in finding seats. Or lived somewhere with a decent public transport system. Helsinki please.

We arrived tired and hangry in a wet drizzly Edinburgh about 20 mins walk away from the hotel.

At Leonardo Hotel, Haymarket. Very helpful staff, and gave the scooter a parking space to save the kerfuffle of getting it in and out of the lift to get to the room.

The staff at the Leonardo Hotel couldn’t have been more helpful, and let us park scooter downstairs in the lobby to save me the extra energy getting it in/out of the lift. It’s a folding travel scooter, it’s light for what it is, but it is still heavy (especially when it’s your muscles that are the broken bits).

Very silly pain levels at this point - thanks to the gawd-awful train journey. Thankfully we live in the middle of nowhere, so an hotel room Just Eat was enough of a novelty to masquerade as an evening’s entertainment. Just for the record, the hotel is a mere 5 minute walk away from a multiplex cinema with an Imax and 4D screenings…

Day two, Edinburgh Zoo.

Their website promised mobility scooter hire that was capable of tackling the very steep hills within the zoo, but when we got there they were out of order. My own wheels, an eFoldi Explorer, is apparently capable of a 1:6 incline. I don’t know what that is, but I can tell you it can reach the pandas but not the zebras. 

Without it, I couldn’t have got much further than the gift shop. And the little kids we met en route absolutely loved it - perhaps because it is a bit odd looking. It’s not your average looking mobility scooter that’s for sho.

The zoo itself is BRILLIANT, well laid out, happy animals, awesome penguins. Good cafes. And once you are aware of the hills, great accessibility across the whole site. They have a little electric minibus to help folks up to the very top. 

The following morning we attempted shopping, but it was just too kerfuffle-y, trying to navigate with Google Maps whilst driving a scooter, and herding two kids in-between tram tracks and bicycles. Especially as at that point we were carrying our luggage, having checked out of the hotel. Edinburgh is very hilly and fairly cobbly which has it’s own challenges, but on my own I think I would have stood a chance.

Time to find a swanky espresso…

Google Maps helped me find Mayvn Cafe on St George Street. Very swanky indeed, even just sitting in the cafe is an experience, with Scandi style decor, designer lighting and video art on the far wall. They are on Insta if you fancy a virtual snoop around:

@mayvncafe

Return journey = Hell on a Stick #2. Total carnage at Edinburgh Station as no trains were going south due to a signal problem at Morpeth. Absolutely nothing was moving, and after an hour of sitting on a stationary train we took the plunge and jumped ship to a train heading cross country to Carlisle, where my husband picked us up. And of course my car was still at Darlington, wonderful, so that was yet more hassle for the following day.

The main problem with nightmare return journeys is they kind of ‘undo’ all the good bits REEEEALLY quickly.

Therefore the next 24 hours went like this…

Jesus H Christ that was awful. OW with bells on. Not doing that again. I’m doomed to stay trapped in the house for ever and ever and ever and I’ll live off pizzas and get fat.

Sleep for 13 hours.

Open Expedia app and search for hotels in Osaka, Japan.

If I can get to Edinburgh, Japan will be a doddle, right…?

Peace out.

[wolint]

VICTORY IN GOD!

VICTORY IN GOD

Psalm 20:7

 

The Bible teaches that true and lasting victory is only found in God and through faith in Jesus Christ. It encourages believers to trust in God’s power, acknowledging that victory results from divine intervention and reliance on the love and strength provided by the Lord.

Spiritual victories come from active faith in Christ Jesus and not on anything or anyone else. The Philistines were afraid because they remembered stories about God’s intervention for Israel when they left Egypt (1 Samuel 14). But Israel had turned away from God and was clinging to only a form of godliness, a symbol of former victories. People and churches often try to live on the memories of God’s blessings. The Israelites wrongly assumed that because God had given them victory in the past, He would do it again, even though they had strayed far from Him. Today, as in Bible times, spiritual victories come through a continually renewed relationship with God. Don’t live off the past. Keep your relationship with God new and fresh.

We face all kinds of conflicts and trials, persecutions and afflictions daily, but the only way to come out victoriously is trust and hope in Christ, as evidenced with Jacob when conflict arose in Genesis 32. His dependency on God gave him victory. The strength we need for conquering these situations and gaining victories comes from Christ.

As stated in Ephesians 6:10-18, God equips you with all the spiritual weapons you need to defeat Satan and temptation. So, to experience daily victories in the difficult struggles of life, we must be willing to commit ourselves to spiritual training and preparation for every eventuality.

Mindset is important to victory! As instructed in Colossians 3:2, setting our minds on things above and not on earthly, natural, temporal things dispels discouragement and shifts our focus to joy.

Spiritual victory is being able to defeat temptations and turmoil when they arise. Anyone who has faith in God will always respond in faith when life struggles occur, and God’s response to our cry, prayer, and faith is what grants us the grace for victory. As declared in 1 Corinthians 15:57, “Thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.”

The scripture promises us a victory far greater and more lasting than any earthly wins and triumphs. We can experience spiritual victory over sin and death, a victory both sure and final through Christ’s victory over death. We may not be “winners” by the world’s standards as believers, but we have been chosen for glory by God according to 1 Corinthians 2:26-31. Jesus encourages us in John 16:33 to take heart, for He has overcome the world for us. Victory belongs to us in Christ!

Spiritual victories often come from small steps taken for and with God. Jonathan didn’t have the authority to lead Saul’s troops into battle in 1 Samuel 14, but he could start a small clash in one corner of the enemy’s camp. When he did, panic broke out among the Philistines, the Hebrews who had been drafted into the Philistine army revolted, and the men who were hiding in the hills regained their courage and returned to fight. When we face difficult situations that seem beyond our control, ask yourself, “What steps can I take now to work toward a solution?” And remember to obey Psalm 37:7: “Be still in the presence of the Lord and wait patiently for Him to act.” We too can experience victory through faith in Christ. Our victories over oppressors may be like those of the Old Testament saints, but more likely, our victories will be specific to the role God wants us to play.

Victory in GOD!

PRAYER: Father, may I experience spiritual victories continually through my renewed relationship with You. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Shalom

WOMEN OF LIGHT INT’L PRAYER MIN.

[the-duckless-pond]

Trying to post a chapter today but struggling to do so. It wasn’t an awful day - pretty average. But without my anxiety meds for another week ish and it’s all compounding and the episodes are lasting a long time. Especially as I continue to adjust to the new sounds and rhythms of the apartment building. Lots of anxiety in the afternoons and evenings that makes it hard to relax and get to a spot where I can post.

But, that being said, last time I posted a chapter I woke up to two comments and that was really nice! I was scared of them for a few hours, but once I checked them I was happy to have read them. And it was fun to wake up to them.

So, I’m slowly making my way to my laptop. Just moved from the living room to the bedroom, and now I’m getting it out of my backpack and onto the bed. I’ve got a few steps - primarily connecting it to my WiFi, but after that it should be easy enough. I want to read the chapter before posting it, but I don’t think I’m there in my anxiety levels just yet. I want to read over the whole story because A) that sounds fun and low impact and like a good distraction for a few days, and B) it might inspire me to finish this chapter I’ve been stuck on and sort of dropped midway when my depression got bad. It helped once before, reading the whole thing, so I am thinking that it will again. Maybe I’ll start doing that tomorrow. That sounds nice.

Okay, laptop is out of the case and booting up. Logged in. Loading. Loaded. And we are on the WiFi now! It was kind of cool - I had my phone unlocked and got a push notification asking if I wanted to share the WiFi password with my laptop. I said yes, and boom it just auto filled in. Never seen that before. That was neat. Okay, back on task. Opening Word. Opening Happenstance. Going to the chapter. Changing chapter status. Opening AO3. Anxiety rising. Pushing through. And in a flurry of activity, it’s up! Phew. Goal achieved.

All I have to do now is clean the litter boxes and I will have achieved every goal I set for the day. That’s a record for the first time in ??? months. Since school ended, at least. It feels nice. I think I’ll do that next.

In other news, I unpacked most of my religious stuff today. It’s been tucked away inside my dresser for about a year, but I think I might find some way to make it more accessible to me. I find it comforting to have. I was also thinking I might say a rosary tonight, since I find that very soothing. I haven’t been to church in ages, but if I could find a progressive one to go to that would be nice. I know there is one downtown, and they offer online Mass so I might check that out next weekend. I intended to today, but my memory has been really bad lately and I didn’t set a reminder to do it. I did set one for this week, so that’s probably going to work out. I have a shot at it, anyway. I don’t know. I just think saying a rosary or starting a chaplet novena or something sounds nice tonight. Maybe I can ask St. Dymphna to pray that my unknown neighbor stops buzzing my fucking buzzer and triggering my panic. She’s a bro about mental health and is def the one to ask about that. Maybe I’ll do that tonight. Her chaplet is super easy and I still remember how to say it. Yeah. I’ll do that. Maybe the rosary too, but I won’t stress it. Those take like 20 min and that feels long tonight. I’ll go slow. Ease myself back in to it.

I am having some negative thoughts tonight. Things like no one wants to be my friend. Mostly that, actually. My best friend has gone dark again, which is fine but is hard when I get like this because I miss her so I text her but then it goes on and on and I feel bad and I go to text her and then delete paragraphs about my day or the cats or my little story because I don’t want to be a bother. And my other close friend is busy training for a new job, so he can’t text a lot. And my mom hates texting. She gets upset about getting messages because typing is hard for her. So I feel bad texting her, so I do the same thing I do with BFF where I write things and then delete them because I feel bad and just stay silent instead. And I haven’t told my sister that I’ve moved yet, because I don’t want to tell her that her kids triggered all this and I don’t know how to have that conversation. And those are the only people I talk to. So mostly I’m spending my days typing things out and then deleting them. It gets lonely. I don’t know. I’m sad about it and it makes me anxious. Maybe my brain is right and no one wants to be my friend and that is why no one talks to me. Maybe. I don’t know. I’m not a good judge of those things.

I got sad again because of that paragraph. I still need to clean the litter boxes, but I just want to lay down now. Get under the covers and pretend I don’t feel this way. I unpacked all my stuffed animals today. Maybe I’ll arrange them in bed with me. It will be less empty that way. Usually the cats sleep with me through the night, but they’ve been getting up before me these past few days so I wake up feeling lonely and listening for them and hearing silence. It makes me sad, but of course they don’t know that. I don’t know. Maybe I’ll push litter boxes to tomorrow. I should do at least one. I guess it wouldn’t be too hard to pick whichever one needs it more and do that, then lay down. I could make a decaf and put it on my box night stand and get under the covers and drink it very carefully since I just washed my sheets. Or I could get up, set the cup to brew, do the litter box, and go back to the couch with the coffee and stay here a little longer. Both sound nice. I guess the first step is starting the cup to brew and cleaning a litter box.

I guess I’ll do that.

[workingfromjapanandchina]

Day 6:

Today was my last day of “working from Japan”, I had a lot of meetings, but overall the workday was good. I also made a backup offer on a house that I probably won’t get, but I wanted to try any way. I had 7-11 pastries for breakfast and for lunch I got some Japanese soufflé pancakes, which are so good. I think they’re merely meringue based. I need to try to make them sometime.

I’m feeling pretty good that I was able to work California time while I was in Japan and not have issues with sleeping or getting my work done. Part of me was a little worried that I might not be able to do it and it would mess with my work commitments, but I was successful, this has been a really fun experience and I have definitely enjoyed taking it easy here in Japan while I’m working. I sort of took the approach of doing small things and not trying to cram a bunch of stuff into every day. I also tried to go to more normal type restaurants and not the fanciest places. This allowed me to live more like a local. to me, this kind of experience is more real than superficial things built just for tourists. For some reason I get more out of the experience of doing normal local things then the fake stuff. The food might be better at the tourist places in some cases, but it is just kind of cool to see normal people going about their days here, living their lives. Some of my coworkers were pretty impressed that I was able to do this but it actually wasn’t that hard since I just was so regimented about staying on my California time zone. It would actually be pretty awesome if I could do this again where I only go to Japan and just stay on Pacific time, the entire trip and then just fly right back home without ever being jet lagged.

After work I decided that I’d switch time zones over to Beijing time, where I’ll be flying to on Monday. So after my full work day it was about 1pm, so I needed to find something to do, in order to stay up late to help switch time zones. I looked up swimming pools and found one 40 mins train ride away. This pool was used for the Olympics I believe. It was a 50 meter long pool, which I’ve never swam in before. The pool I swim in usually is only 25 meters. I had no clue about the rules of the lanes, so I asked a lifeguard and he was very helpful. Even the lady at the booth where you pay to get in was super helpful as well, and made sure I could figure out the machine and also helped walk me over to where I needed to go.

The pool locker room/shower area was huge. This place is massive. After the super hot air outside I really wanted to get in the water. I jumped in and started to swim in the slow lane, since they have three levels. I quickly figured out that slow is too slow for me so I went to the medium lane. I was pushing myself to go a bit faster than normal so that I didn’t slow anyone down. My heart rate would go up quite a bit on each lap, and I’d be out of breath. I don’t think I did any wall kick turns haha. I could see the fast people next to me swimming way faster than me. It was pretty inspiring, they are so powerful and efficient.

After I did 20 laps or 1000 meters I decided to finish my swim. Of course I forgot a towel and I didn’t know where to find fresh towels, so I just showered and then was about to change, all soaked but there was a sign that said to dry off before going back into the locker room. So I went back into the pool area to sit down and watched how some of the really good swimmer’s techniques. It was pretty awesome to watch as in my swimming classes there aren’t people this good. It was so hot and humid in the pool area that I just kept sweating and wasn’t really drying off. Normally when I swim pretty hard I’ll get out and sweat but this was a whole different level.

After 20 mins I decided to just go change even though I was still wet. It didn’t really matter because I was going to be sweating so much once I got outside anyway. I missed my train stop by one station so I just ended up getting out at the next station and walking 15 mins back to my hotel. The heat was the most intense I’ve ever experienced here so far. 96 degrees and 66% humidity. It was unreal, and felt like you were walking inside of a hot oven. I was sweating a ton, and was just speechless on how hot it was, I could see this being very dangerous for some people.

After getting back I was just too hot to go out for food even though I was starving. So I just got a pizza delivered instead. Unfortunately it wasn’t that great, but I think pizzas aren’t meant to be put into boxes; it was probably a lot better when it was fresh. I was so hungry that I didn’t really care.

I tried to stay awake a bit later but I think I crashed around 6pm local time and then woke up at 11pm unfortunately. I need to get back to sleep!

[nathandulce]

Bangkok 2024

The one and only time I visited Bangkok was in 2012 when I did an excessive amount of shopping, while Joan kept revisiting the Naraya boutique, and I thought I was being very adventurous when I tried a live shrimp salad from a street vendor only to become very sick and come down with a viral fever for an entire week.

So when I decided to revisit Bangkok this year, I was all sorts of nervous, I mean, could you blame me?

I made sure I had packed sufficient amounts of first aid like my charcoal pills, paracetamol, etc and refrained from eating anything from the street stalls... But I am no way hinting that Bangkok is a dirty or unhygienic place; I just happened to figure out that I have a very sensitive stomach as I coursed through the river of my adult life in my 20s.

My very first meal in Bangkok: a simple bowl of Thai boat noodles at MBK shopping centre. Needless to say, it was delicious.

There was a pet fair going on at Siam Square which I happened to pass by when I was walking around aimlessly. Tortoises are one of my favourite animals.

Snakes are my favourite animals too! This is a giant anaconda and he was just curious about the outside world (all the humans walking around must have smelled delicious to him).

Siam Center at dusk.

Went to a small local bar located in one of the Bangkok Suburbs where they didn't have an actual menu, but the attentive bartender was more than happy to make drink recommendations or serve us drinks of our choice. My partner and I spent quite a few hours here sitting at the outdoor bar (they have indoor seating as well with a live band on some nights) just chatting and enjoying the warm night breeze.

Stayed at this cute boutique hotel called Nine Design Place which was located on a very quiet street away from the hustle and bustle of downtown BKK, and yet within walking distance to MBK Centre (less than 10 mins) and to train stations. The owner of the hotel was a former flight stewardess who takes great pride in her business and it really shows in the quality of the rooms and services. She insisted that my partner and I try their mango sticky rice dessert before we left the premises for the day and it was pretty good!

Typical BKK traffic in the middle of the day. And also, the weather was 38 degrees (celcius).

Delicious Thai food @ Somtam Bangkok located at Siam Square.

Thailand doing things right. Yes to marriage equality!

Thankfully I made it through the trip without getting sick, but also because I was a little more careful about where I was eating. I even ate a local chicken rice shop located in a back alley and was expecting my stomach to churn, but I was actually alright.

I guess I was just being paranoid.

Bangkok is cool. I'll love to visit again.

[diariesofapisces]

I Love My Love.

yesterday I was sitting outside of the building he lives at. Not in a creepy way I was just waiting for the next train. I was having a tough time and I looked up ways to kill myself on Reddit. I am of course a bit crazy so I knew that he would leave at 4:30ish so I thought I might see him. 20 minutes passed, and I gave up allowing myself to fully be engrossed in this Reddit feed. Out of nowhere, I see a hand reached out in front of me and it's him. He wants me to "dap him up" which of course I do, and he tries to have a good conversation and I try my best to be as dry as possible. Because he truly doesn't deserve my sparkling personality. After he gives up he leaves and says that he'll be back in 10 min to which I reply that I'll be gone by then. And then I get up once we walk away and I go to the train station. This might seem so stupid to an outsider, but to me, this is great progress. Old me would have tried everything to get him to stay. Old me would have tried to get him to invite me to walk with him and then beat myself up if he didn't. Old me would have waited for him to come back, and let's be honest old me would have missed her train just to have 10 minutes alone with him. New me got up and walked away. It hurt. It hurt to know I passed up an opportunity to satisfy my craving. However in the end it felt better to know that I was in control. That conversation did not change jack shit. Even the look in his eyes looked like he truly cared about it, it doesn't change the fact that he's an asshole. That conversation won't make him give me attention ask me to hang out or be there for me when I need someone. And that's why I no longer see it as a missed opportunity and more of a missed heartbreak. I chose myself over pleasing him and even though it was such a manual maneuver soon it would be natural. I won't even have to think about it. He also tagged me in a post for the first time which is weird because it was from Thundercat which was almost a month ago.I wasn't even in the photo. I

MOVE ON!!!!

11/2/2023

[consideratecarlee]

Fall 2023 Vacation - Day 1 and Day 2

Stayed up until past midnight last night to get some work done. Then did about 1.4 hours of work this morning.

The shuttle van came on time and we got to the airport 3 hours before the flight (I only live about 20-30 mins away). The security screening wasn't bad - just 16 minutes - but I'm not sure I like the new-ish Automated Screening Lanes (ASL). In theory, you can move through screening more quickly, but 1) I couldn't move my bin(s) forward because other bins from people behind me kept pushing past and 2) my bins were interspersed between other people's bins. I imagine this last point would make it easier for things to just "disappear" (a la former Taipei Mayor Ko Wen-Je's cellphone).

For my trip in the Spring, we were scheduled to depart at 4:20pm and arrive at 9:15pm, but ended up departing late and landed around 9:49pm. This flight was scheduled for 4:30pm, with a landing time of 9:25pm. I was a little worried about this (whether we'd catch the Taoyuan MRT, whose last trip is at 11-ish) - fortunately, we departed on time AND even landed 15 minutes early!

We got through the Immigration line quickly - only 10 minutes, since a staffer directed us to a line for ROC nationals (even though we technically no longer have ROC passports).

Hopped on the Taoyuan MRT - costs $150NT (about $5 USD) to get to Taipei Main Station. We just took the first train that arrived, which was the commuter train (more stops) and it took us about 53 minutes.

Slight drizzle when we emerged at Taipei Main Station. It's so humid!

Dinner on flight to TPE:

Entree: Beef, broccoli, carrots, potatoes and sweet potatoes. (The other option was chicken and rice).

Sides: Carrot cake, quinoa salad, dinner roll (saved this), Kit Kat, bottled water (saved this) and ginger ale.

Breakfast on flight to TPE:

Entree: Frittata, chicken sausage, hashbrown, and broccoli. (I think the other option was possibly rice noodles (vermicelli)?).

Sides: Strawberry yogurt (the silver lid), fruit (apple, cantaloupe, grapes), croissant (saved this), and coffee.

The “Taiwan the Lucky Land” booth is just outside the terminal - we didn’t win any prizes. (By the way, do they realize that the banner on the website says “Taiwan the Luck Land”?)

[j-graysonlibrary]

The Xiang Chronicles: Book One Chapter 20

Title: The Xiang Chronicles: Book One

Author: Jay Grayson

Word Count: 83k

Genres: Fantasy, adventure, drama, LGBT+

Available on: my website

Synopsis: Every few centuries a hero is born—one chosen by the God Tiandi to carry out his will in the mortal realm. The Xiang. Whether it is to quell a war instigated by the forces of shadow—of Shakti herself—or whether it is the miasma that poisons the world, the Xiang is born to bring the world back into balance.

Shu Pangu Min knows what his purpose is and he does his best to fulfill it even if he doesn’t fully understand all of the details. He must travel from city to city—lord to lord—to clear out the miasma. Along the way, he is to enlist the aid of four disciples. Each is to be of a different country and each must have high resonance and deep faith.

The holy men who raised him have great confidence in his future successes and they leave him to begin his journey on his own. But, can Pangu live up to the expectations of those around him? Can he really save the land like all other Xiang before him or will his unconventional methods doom them all?

Full chapter 20 under the cut

Chapter XX

Kira watched from the campsite as Pangu held Baiya’s hands, unlocking his abilities for him. He absentmindedly stirred the pot of stew while staring at the two of them.

Since they left the farm in the capable hands of some of Phay’s men, Pangu had been attached to Baiya’s hip. It wasn’t one-sided either. The older man looked at the Xiang with a very particular look that Kira was all too familiar with. Of course, Pangu didn’t notice and he doubted Raine had either.

A hand on his nearly made him jump and drop the spoon.

“What?” he looked over to find Raine staring at him fairly intently.

“You were lost in your own world there…” the man said, “Are you worried about Pangu?”

“I….yes…” Kira pulled his hand away slowly. “Aren’t you?”

He tilted his head to the side. “You do not trust his intuition in picking Baiya?”

“If I recall correctly, you didn’t want that man on our team either,” Kira pointed out. “What changed?”

“Pangu chose him. That is his decision to make so I must respect it.” Raine smiled for a second. “But I see it still troubles you.”

“I don’t like him,” he responded honestly, “He hovers around Pangu too much, don’t you think?”

“He’s learning.”

“You are so naive.”

Raine frowned and looked from him to the two in the distance. He watched how they talked and held onto each other and while he saw no difference between that and when he’d had his seal removed, he wondered if Kira was reading more into it.

The only thing that came to his mind was, “Are you jealous?”

“Jealous?” Kira repeated in confusion. “Jealous of who, exactly?”

“…Of Baiya,” Raine stated.

Kira stared at him with an open mouth before narrowing his eyes. “You still think that, Raine?”

“I’m not sure,” he defended, “but it seems as though you may be.”

“I’m protective over Pangu,” Kira shot back, “I do not want to be in a relationship with him. Damn, it’s a good thing you’re pretty because you are incredibly dense.”

“Dense?!”

“Dense!” He confirmed and pushed him in the shoulder. “You are.”

Raine frowned and looked down at the stew. He wasn’t sure how he was supposedly dense but he had a feeling he wouldn’t get any answers by pressing the issue.

It didn’t matter anyway—Pangu and Baiya returned to the camp fire.

“So,” Raine asked the newest disciple, “How does it feel?”

“Strange,” he answered honestly, “I can tell something is different but I am not sure I can explain it.”

“You will understand more when you start actually channeling your element,” Raine assured him.

“We can start training tomorrow,” Pangu said and smiled over at the man.

“No practicing on my own, right?” Baiya asked with a matching smile.

“Right.”

Kira rolled his eyes and started to silently dole out bowls for dinner. He kept his attention on Pangu and Baiya while they ate, noticing the small glances and gestures. He’d have to have a talk with one of them—preferably Pangu since any “talk” with Baiya would probably escalate.

But then again, talking with Pangu about this was bound to be painfully awkward. Especially if the man wasn’t even aware of his feelings for Baiya which Kira did consider. Taking into account his upbringing, it was a possibility.

He decided that, for the time being, he would continue to watch them. When they got to the next town or city, he and Pangu would have their usual meeting after the cleansing ceremony anyway. He could talk with him then.

Along with getting troops to help Baiya’s family farm, the soldiers of Phay also gifted the Xiang and his disciples a new horse so everyone had their own. It would make the journey far easier, especially the farther west they went where the air became dryer and hotter.

They stopped the next day for a break—almost more for their horses than for them. Pangu had also promised Baiya a training lesson.

There were no trees or dried brush around to worry about lighting ablaze so Baiya’s only challenge would be not burning himself and not burning Pangu. Though, Pangu already erected a thin barrier over himself in case things got out of hand.

“So, Raine manipulates water and Kira has earth but both of those things can be found around us,” Baiya started, “How do I make fire just appear?”

“The trick is, it isn’t specifically fire that your are manipulating,” Pangu explained, “It is more…heat. Actually, your elemental connection is closely linked with air since you can increase the temperature and, sort of, combust things spontaneously. The potential for the fire is already in the air but your energy acts as a spark that lights it if that makes sense.”

“…Some,” Baiya nodded and followed along.

“Similarly, if we were somewhere with a lot of humidity, Raine could technically pull the moisture from the air and use that. He’d need a lot more training to get to that point but, theoretically, it is possible.”

“Interesting.” He nodded.

“Alright now hold your hands out like this,” Pangu said and cupped his hands out in front of him. When the man copied his hands, he moved his to rest over the top, creating a small pocket of air between them. “I’m going to help you to get a fire started so you know what it feels like but then I am going to pull away and you’ll have to sustain it on your own.”

Baiya’s eyes focused on their hands and he nodded his head slightly. “I’m ready.”

Pangu took a deep breath and started to slowly light a fire between them. He made sure to keep it low but warm so the man could get used to the sensation. When it suddenly grew larger, he knew that Baiya was the one controlling it—not him.

So he pulled away and let the flame lip up into the air. He was ready to extinguish it, if necessary, but it was just a long, wispy flame for now.

“Try to bring it back down,” he suggested.

“Trying,” Baiya responded and bit down on his lip. Pangu let him struggle with it, believing he could get it done. But then the flame reached higher and burst out.

Pangu shielded them both from the blowback but it still clearly startled Baiya.

“Damn it!” he huffed and dropped his hands. “I thought I had that.”

“You did well,” Pangu immediately said. He grabbed his hands and held them tightly. “That was only your first try. No one gets it on their first try—that is why we practice.”

“…Thanks, Xiang.” Baiya’s eyes diverted to the side.

“You can call me Pangu, you know.”

“Hey,” Kira’s voice broke them apart. He and Raine walked over with very different expressions. Kira frowned. “What was that beacon I saw light up the sky?”

“Me,” Baiya admitted, “First training didn’t go so well.”

“Everyone is a little bad at first,” Raine reassured him was a smile.

“That is what the Xi—Pangu…said…” Baiya awkwardly used his name and then cleared his throat. “Anyway, we need to get to the next town, right? If we head out now, we can make it by nightfall so we don’t have to camp out again.”

“Do you have any money for us to stay at an inn?” Kira asked, looking at the man with a raised eyebrow.

“You three don’t have money?”

“We…we have some,” Pangu said and scratched the back of his head.

“It was your first attack on us that scared off Raine’s horse. Which had most of our money,” Kira pointed out and crossed his arms. “So I thought it was only fair that you paid for, say, the first three or four inns we stay at.”

Baiya opened and closed his mouth before shaking his head. “Fine. But we should try to earn some gold on the way.”

“Kira has that covered,” Raine mentioned and smiled at the man, ��Right?”

“I can figure something out,” he responded before dropping his arms and shrugging. He wasn’t sure if people in Agni played by different rules when it came to their card games but he guessed he would soon find out.

When they reached the new town, they went through the rounds of speaking to the mayor, getting a ceremony planned for the following day, and then retiring to the inn. Because of their low funds, they were only able to afford two rooms which were split up between Pangu and Kira and then Raine and Baiya.

But Kira didn’t feel like going to sleep just yet so he walked downstairs to the bar and took a seat. He ordered some rice wine and sighed. After taking a sip of his drink he almost choked. People weren’t kidding when they said everything in Agni was spicy.

Even the alcohol had a kick to it.

While he was recovering from the burn on his throat, someone sat down next to him. He didn’t have to look over to know who it was.

“What do you want?”

“I can’t want a nightcap as well?” Baiya asked and signaled to the bar keep. He had a glass of dark liquid poured for him which he drank some of immediately. “So, what is your problem with me, Kira? Don’t think I haven’t noticed.”

Kira frowned and leaned away from him. “I know your type.”

“My type?” he questioned and then chuckled. “There has to be more than that but I just can’t figure out what it is. I’m not trying to kill you anymore so it can’t be that and I’m staying away from what is clearly your territory.”

“Excuse me?” Kira asked, “My territory? What does that mean?”

Baiya laughed again, “Raine. You like him, don’t you?”

He found his eyes narrowing. “Of course it is you that notices. Fuck my life.”

“Have you told him?” the man questioned before taking another swig of his drink.

“Have I…? No, you idiot, why would I do that?” Kira replied, “And before you get any wise ideas, you had better keep all of this to yourself or else I’ll tell Pangu about your little crush.”

Baiya’s jaw hung open. “I was not going to tell Raine—you didn’t have to resort to blackmail.”

“Just know that I know.” He pointed at him. “You have things way easier than me too, you know.”

“How?” The other man frowned. “Because Raine could decide to be with some else but Pangu can’t because he’s the Xiang?”

“No,” Kira answered and gave him an obvious look. But as the silence persisted, it seemed as if he really hadn’t noticed it himself. “Wow, you are all dumb. All three of you.”

“I take offense to that,” Baiya said.

“Good,” he responded, “You were supposed to.”

Baiya sighed. “Be honest, Kira. You don’t like me because I’m taking your position as the ‘criminal’ disciple. You’re worried that was all you had going for you.”

“Will you please shut up? Before I punch you?” He glared at him.

“I see I hit a sore spot.”

Kira was ready to break a bottle over his head when he heard some low talking a few tables behind them. The only reason he picked up on the conversation was because one of them used the word “Xiang”. Both he and Baiya looked over.

“Yeah, I heard he was in town,” one sketchy man said to the other, “I bet he has some goods on him.”

“Even if he don’t, we could get quite a price from his body.”

“Not even his whole body—I bet she’d take just a piece,” he snickered.

Kira and Baiya looked at each other before they both stood from the bar and walked over. Almost as if they shared a mind for the time being, they each put their hands on their hips and looked down at the table of shady men.

“Could we talk to you outside for a moment?” Kira asked with a smirk.

[thedivinefish]

TGIWednesday: The owl winked & it blended into ONE

TGIWednesday News

It seems like a lifetime ago when my father dragged my brother and I hunting and fishing worldwide.  On one such outing, we were on our farm in North Florida where there were plenty of wild turkeys and deer.  On this particular day I was reluctantly tasked with cleaning out the deer stands.  And if you didn’t do it to Father’s approval, he might make you help him take his belt off or go get him a switch in the woods!  Well there was no way on a sunny, yet chilly, afternoon that I wasn’t going to take in the fresh air and liveliness of the forest sights and sounds.  Standing in a tree stand, I noticed an owl perched on a limb a few trees away.  He was so beautiful; I just starred at him.  At some point he winked and for me everything in all directions switched to what looked like a blended kaleidoscope of fall colors.  It was as if all colors blended into a fabric where everything was seen as interconnected.  My first thought was, "Man this is wildly cool," followed by my second thought of static terror thinking, "I hope I come back out of this!"   What lasted only about 10 seconds felt like an hour, but as fast as it happened, it snapped back to a reality that made more sense!  Still in my early 20’s, I will never forget this event or the lesson of how interconnected EVERYTHING is.  Stay Tuned... When did we last have a session together?  If the answer is too long ago, get on the schedule today...  Let’s do this!

And if you just need a quick tune-up from anywhere in the world...  Appointments View Calendar First, Then Pay and Schedule 15 mins  | 30 mins  | 60 mins

TGIWednesday Download

~ ALL THINGS BLENDING INTO ONE  ~ I believe, think, know and feel that every aspect of this world, all others and even my very own little world, are all interwoven and connected. I know, when, where, how and why to remember that I am part of a tapestry of life and that we are all a collective consciousness of powerful force. I am ready, willing and able to be more positive knowing that it’s not the destination but the journey & that we should enjoy contributing in any way we can to others for the benefit of all. I am asking in all languages and throughout all time lines and so it is.  Making a little daily progress will cause the rest of your life to be the best of your life!

On Deck... What is Life Force Energy?

We’ve done a ton of fishing on word tracks, affirmations and clearing negative and downloading more positive and - oh my goodness - what amazing effects we’ve seen and experienced!  But what about numbers? Numbers you ask?... Yes numbers!  Sitting next to someone on a plane who does not speak or understand your language - if you write down 2 + 2 = ___  they will write down 4.

Everything can be broken down into the language of numbers and those numbers measure Life Force Energy - positive vs negative, flow vs block.  So what Spirit came up with and gave to me to give to you, along with the concept of fishing, is to use numbers as a percentage of strength or weakness. How weak are your eyes from 0-100%?  Let’s erase those blocks.  Are there blocks in your finances?  If so, on a scale of 0-100% what’s the percentage of the block or the flow?  How about being chosen for a new job? Or whether we’ll have a baby or not? What are the strengths and weaknesses of the percentage of probability? We can change them!    We’re going to simplify and show you how to get even MORE results out of your fishing and show you how to DECREASE taking on blocks and INCREASE your energetic flow.  We will address with finger muscle testing, pendulums and of course standing sway testing. Stay tuned for this ingenious way to get even more results and amazing outcomes!  It will be in our new Masterclasses Training Center taught in written, audio and video lessons.

Tentative release is July 7th (7/7/2023) 

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JOIN US ON A SPECIAL DAY THURSDAY- JUNE 29TH  at 7:30PM  EASTERN Theme:  Harmony Pre-register at Calendly for $22 (includes reminders and replay)    

So much of our lives are out of “harmony” with things. How many times have you been sad or wished you could do or say this or that? It’s because you were not in harmony with the person, place, thing, pet or situation. Let’s get you back on track with this Zoom event focused on being in harmony with our health, life’s mission, relationships, family, work job career

1) Personal wish: I would like to be more in harmony with ________________

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Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell the Fish - 365 Daily Inspirations and Affirmations - by Jimmy Mack Own this e-book so that you can read inspiration every day!

JUNE 7TH "Today I will not judge all books by their covers. I will not pass an opportunity just because everything is not lining up perfectly. I will move things forward down the field. I will not give up or surrender. I will press on and mold the clay in my hands into the vision I have in my head."

Come See Me In Tampa

SESSIONS AT SWANN HOLISTIC HEALTH SOLUTIONS  

Jimmy Mack will be offering sessions at Dr. Charla Tempone’s office on the last Friday of each month

The next opportunity for Tampa office sessions: TBD

Please call their office directly at  ?? (813) 873-7773 in order to get on the schedule for 15-minutes $45 or 30-minutes $75. If you’re new to working with him, we suggest you schedule 30 minutes

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From the Fish Box

  Hi Jimmy. You did two readings for me in Feb. and March. I was very worried I had lung cancer or some other cancer because of a pain in my back. Both of your readings you didn't pick up on anything and said "nothing catastrophic" that became my mantra. Well I finally went to the doctor and had a series of screenings. You were right. I thought you should know that. I do have severe arthritis of the lumbar spine but everything else was clear. Thank you for all you do. - Kathy S.

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In addition, throughout the full 30-days, Jimmy will be dialing into your energetic signature each day upon rising and make certain that you are a clear yes, unclear to no and running forward before you start your day. He is doing the heavy lifting for you around 3am NY time while most of you are asleep in order to smooth out your way and increase your most favorable life outcomes.

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The Fish Market

Below is list of over 35 titles in the MyBeliefWorks Clearings audio series, monthly Zoom clearing call replays and Guided Energy Processess. Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better and we are ALWAYS working on the next one. Don’t forget… you can share these with your immediate friends and family.

Freedom from Abuse Overcoming Addiction Receiving Abundance Body Scan: Head to Toe Healing Bountiful Harvest Igniting Creative Spark Discovering Your Destiny Daily GPS Reset Releasing Dark Energies/Fears Crossroads -Decision Making Diet & Exercise Support Education & Learning Support Empowering the Empath Enthusiasm for Life Financial Windfall Gold Coin: Money in All Forms Healing Family Relationships Healing Body Disorders Joy of Money

IRS Stress & Taxes Relieving Holiday Stress Increasing Intuition Easing IRS Stress & Taxes Lucky 777  Finding Love & Romance Mental Stress Positive Money Mindset Moving Forward from Past Chronic Pain Relief Pet Healing Support Improving Sales & Success Improving Sex Improving Sleep Pro$perity Unlocked Traveling with Ease Treasure Chest Work & Career Success Weight Loss Support Restoring Youth & Vitality

We now offer digital Gift Certificates for gift-giving. Gift a free session, daily prayers or clearing audios/videos to someone special.  You simply select the denomination that matches the gift you'd like to give from the options on this page amounts from $19 - $225.

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Terahertz Quantum Frequency Wand The power of this frequency seems to reach every corner of the human cell, bringing about "activation" to the human body. The frequency is very effective for working on weak human cells, enzymes and DNA, restoring the body to its normal state. Use code: TSG10 get 10% off (Now back in stock!)

The 5 Anchors Process

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TGIFunny

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