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miraculouslbcnreactions · 11 months

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Can you elaborate more on how Amelie is indulgent with Felix?

In Felix (the episode), after Felix does all that awful stuff including trying to make Adrien's friend's hate him via impersonating him, we get this:

Adrien: That video you sent to my friends... Unforgivable, Félix. (Félix doesn't look him in the eye, only looks down, upset and ashamed) Amelie: Now that his father isn't here to stop him from getting into mischief - (Félix stops her.) Félix: I don't deserve to be forgiven, mom. I put my favorite cousin in danger. He's right. No apology can ever be enough.

Now, we don't know exactly what Amelie was about to say, but Felix's interruption makes it pretty clear that she was about to defend everything he did or at least downplay it. Otherwise why would he say that he didn't deserve to be forgive and that Adrien was right?

This is further supported by the next scene in which we see Felix and Amilie. They get on the train and what does Amelie do?

Félix: I've got a surprise for you, mom. (He reaches behind her ear and pulls out Gabriel's ring.) Amelie: (gasps) But Gabriel refused to hand it over to me! And after everything that happened - (reaches out and cups his face) My little magician. I can never understand how you always manage to get what you want. (closes her hand over his) Keep it. It's yours now. Félix: But... you wanted it so much. Amelie: Only to give it to you. You've always been so fascinated by them. How many times have you asked me to tell you the story of the Graham de Vanily twin rings, huh? (she kisses his forehead) I'm glad it's back in the family where it truly belongs. (She winks at him and then rests her eyes. Félix smiles deviously out the window.)

She praises him for stealing and doesn't say a single word about all of the messed up things he did. If this were my kid, we would be talking about his actions were and trying to get him to explain why he did all of that. We'd also be discussing his punishment.

We also learn that Amelie only demanded that her recently widowed and still grieving brother-in-law give up his wedding ring because Felix wanted it. Even though, arguably, the rings should go to Adrien or at least stay with Gabriel until someone in the family is ready to marry. Amelie had no need for them other than "baby wants it, baby gets it."

This was before the sentireveal, so it's debatable if the original intent was to take it this far or if this is just another victim of the retcon, but it's canon now and the writers claim to have planned it all from the start, so I'm going to treat it as fully intentional and discuss the sentistuff, too.

We never see Felix or Amelie learn that the rings are Adrien's amoks, but Felix very clearly knew that's what the ring he had was. Based on that, it's not illogical to conclude that Amelie knew that she was asking for Adrien's amok and didn't care. Baby wants his cousin's controls, baby gets it.

Moving on!

The start of season five sees Ladybug and Chat Noir try to track down Felix since he knows Monarch's identity and gave him all of the miraculous. Kinda a big deal. When they get to London, this happens:

Amelie: My son wasn't here this morning, when I woke up. I didn't worry though, because I thought he might have gone to see his cousin Adrien in Paris. Those two are so fond of each other, but Félix wasn't returning my calls, though I contacted his uncle Gabriel; he told me he hadn't seen him. Cosmobug: And yet he was in Paris I talked to him. Amelie: Oh, Cosmobug, Astrocat, I hope nothing's happened to him! Cosmobug: Don't worry, ma'am. He'll probably end up at his uncle's. Astrocat: Or he might already be on his way back home to London. Amelie: Thanks so much to the two of you for your support!

Then the heroes leave. At the end of the episode, we cut back to London and see this:

Amelie: Tea break. (Félix comes out of the room holding a laptop and follows Amelie to the main hall. Amelie pours tea into a cup, while Félix sits on a sofa and works on his laptop.) Amelie: (putting her hand on Félix's head) Don’t worry, my Félix. Mom is here to protect you from those superheroes who think you’re a villain.

Who cares about saving Paris from a terrorist? If her baby wants to hide away, then Amelie will help him hide away.

Also, if she had forced Felix to talk to the heroes here, then Gabriel wouldn't have died because this is before Destruction. Not saying that his death is her fault, but Amelie did inadvertently let to her nephew be orphaned because she didn't want Felix to face the consequences of his own actions. Remember that as you read this next bit.

And then we have Emotion, which sees Amelie storm into the diamond dance and cause a massive, confusing scene:

Amelie Graham de Vanily: (struggles to make her way in through the guards) Gabriel! My son Félix has been missing for weeks now! (storms towards them) Not only have you and your friends been no help with the search! But now I'm not even invited to the ball?! You haven't been the same since my sister Emilie disappeared! Why are you rejecting us? Gabriel: This is not the place nor the time, Amelie. Nathalie will see you out. (Nathalie begins to walk towards Amelie, and grabs her by the wrist, walking her outside of the ball) Amelie: I don't understand how Gabriel could've become so cruel, let alone why you're still complacent in his actions. Nathalie: Sorry, Amelie. I have no choice. (hands Amelie to the guards) Amelie: There's always a choice, Nathalie.

Ignoring the massively hypocritical "you're still complacent in his actions" line, this is a weird scene. Amelie waltzed right into the mansion back in Felix (the episode). If she wanted to talk to Gabriel about the fact that Felix was missing, why not do that again? It's not like this is urgent. She's apparently waited weeks to come talk to him. Why now?

Cut to the end of the episode and we get our answer:

Amelie: You were right: I did everything you told me to and Gabriel didn't do or say anything to help me. He despises me. He's a monster! They're all monsters! Argos: Hold my feather. (He de-transforms into Félix and goes to hug Amelie) Félix: Not all of them. (smiles)

So Amelie was just doing what every good mom does: blindly follows her child's instructions.

What were you expecting Gabriel to do, hon? Stop the event? This is such a weird test to pull. It'd be different if Felix had just gone missing, but she literally says "weeks". Why is she shocked that Gabriel correctly said "this is not the place nor the time, Amelie"?

I don't like to give Gabriel points, but he gets them here. I wouldn't cancel my event either. I'd tell her to come talk to me tomorrow or ask an assistant to talk to her. Of course, I'd also have been helping with the search before this, but that brings us to the second issue: Felix isn't missing.

What have the search efforts been? What does Amelie want Gabriel to do? No one has ever mentioned an ongoing search and our heroes would absolutely be involved in that since Felix, you know, aided a terrorist, but they're not so this all feels like a shit test.

Also, please remember, this is right after Felix snapped humanity out of existence as Argos and he detransforms in front of his mother. Either Amelie was living in a bubble or she saw everything her son did and was just like, "That's cool, baby! Mommy loves you! Go commit genocide! Your song was so good!"

This is all probably Amelie overcompensating for Colt's abuse, but you asked this in response to another post where I said that Amelie and Andre are the same, so that excuse doesn't really hold water. Andre spoils Chloe for the exact same reason. Aubrey's abuse may have looked different, but it was still abuse.

The only difference between Amelie and Andre is that Andre abuses his mayoral power for Chloe's sake and Amelie doesn't do anything like that. But then, Amelie doesn't have that type of power to abuse. If she did, then I have no doubt that she'd do the exact same thing, so I'm not giving her that point. She is exactly the same: overly indulgent to the point that she's made her child rotten.

Overly indulging an abused person like this isn't going to help them get over their abuse. That's what therapy is for. I adore the magical power of love, but only when it comes to magical threats. Love is not enough to fix anyone's mental health. You can't love away things like PTSD.

#amelie graham de vanily #felix graham de vanily #felix fathom #Is this salt?#I'm not sure because I'm not really analyzing anything here #I'm just listing out what happens in canon #I view this in the same light as saying “lila is a liar” and listing lies #But feel free to comment if there's a tag that I should add

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invisiblegarters · 1 year

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Micro (or not) BL Reviews

It's that time again. Seeing as how a couple of things have ended recently and I let my obsession with a certain drama sort of take over everything else of late, I dedicated this week to catching up on all the things I've been missing and doing a quick round up (or not so quick, as it's me).

So let's get started, shall we?

Recently Completed

Stay By My Side - Oh Taiwan. I just love you. I think we had like eighteen "fall into you" moments in the first three episodes alone. The premise was fun - it reminded me a lot of Master's Sun, but the execution of course is totally different. The leads were cute. The chemistry was chemistrying. I loved the sister and that basketball boys. It was mostly fluff, which I am not complaining about because I love me some fluff. That said, I don't think it did anything particularly revolutionary and it never really did manage to grab me. 7.5/10

Wedding Plan - A MAME offering, but…not bad? I mean, not great either, although I will put up with a lot for the premise because I eat shit like that up, but I've seen way worse from MAME. However, it's not going to become a guilty pleasure show like LITA or an unexpected comfort show despite myself (at least the AePete parts) like Love by Chance. It was fine.

Things I really did like: Nuea's family and his workmates (I loved how fiercely both sets of people stood by and supported him through everything from his huge mistake in sleeping with the groom to running back home to deal with it to basically adopting Lom into the group when they worked it out ("we have a new brother in law"). The lesbians - I could have used a bit more heat but I'll take it for now. Let's work on normalizing GL in our BL (frankly I'd love it if we started doing more of that and less of the token straight couple or three)! Was a little annoyed by how they had to fix everything but I won't pretend that the bits with them in episode 6 didn't get to me - I may have teared up a little when Marine was being treated so horribly by Yiwa's mother - that whole thing was so upsetting on a number of levels. And I was happy for them that they could afford to run away to their own happy ending. Also the gag of Lom pretending to be devastated when he was anything but was kinda funny, I will give the show that. And I did like the way that Lom's mom came around - realizing with time that losing her son the same way Yiwa's mother lost her could be a very real result if she kept being rigid. I also liked that she didn't just suddenly become a PFLAG member (or whatever the equivalent would be here) but simply told her son that she would work on it, because that felt more realistic.

The show also got me with how fucking lonely it must have been for both Lom and Yiwa, to know that they were gay and that they could never say anything, and how overwhelming and relieving it must have been to find someone who understood in each other. No fucking wonder they'd do anything for each other. I would have too, if I'd had someone like that growing up.

So yeah. It was fine. I mostly had a good time, even if I got a little bored once or twice. Frankly when it comes to MAME, being a little bored is preferable to feeling like the top of my head is about to come off because I'm so annoyed. Final verdict 7/10

Jun & Jun - Korea keeps making office BLs and I will continue watching them until the end of time. Especially if they keep on serving good kiss while they do it. And this one had bonus scent kink! I honestly don't know what's gotten into Korea lately but I am very much here for it.

This was a fun little office BL. I liked how flirty it was from the get go, the way that both Juns danced around each other with the full knowledge that they were flirting. The intern group was fun, too. I really enjoyed the boyfriend episode at the end.

Everyone was very cute in this, but Simeon was my utter favorite. He totally stole the show for me. Him and Young. Young especially was a surprise, since she drove me bonkers when she first showed up. But she grew on me. I liked how fast she decided to embrace Lee Jun, and her and Choi Jun's friendship was cute.

I shipped Simeon and Hyung Hyun Jae too. Hard.

All in all this was cute, even if it didn’t manage to grip me as hard as I hoped. Like I said before, I'm not sure what's gotten into Korea lately but I hope it continues. 8/10.

Laws of Attraction - When I first saw the trailer for this, I decided to skip it. The leads were attractive enough but to be honest it seemed kinda poorly made and like it didn't know what it was going to do with itself. And I was feeling surly and judgmental and decided that it just wasn't for me. Also it was on iQIYI and I had no interest in signing up for another subscription.

But then I saw someone had stuck it on youtube and I was bored one Saturday an there were a few eps already out, so I thought, eh, why not?

And I've not regretted it for a moment. I loved this show so much my god. Even when OF started (and you all know how much I obsess about OF) this was still the thing I looked forward to most on Saturdays. I adored Charn and his shark smile from moment one, and that adoration did not cease throughout the entirety of the show's run. His character development was by far the best on the show, and I loved the slow, stumbling way he regained the person he used to be, while still keeping the ruthlessness of the man he allowed anger and bitterness to let him become (up to a point). I loved that the show began and ended with his shark smile, but for very different reasons. And he and Tinn were adorable.

I appreciated them banging the marriage equality drum, too, and especially Charn's very pragmatic reasons for wanting it to be legal (as a lawyer, he would think like that, and I appreciate that the show kept him in character even when he was sappy). I also loved his wedding jacket I want four.

I also loved Tinn, and I have to give credit to Jam for the way he portrayed him. While Film totally ate as Charn I do think that in some ways a character like Tinn is harder to portray, because it would be very very easy for him to become preachy because of his morality and rigid sense of justice. But Jam played him with enough nuance that he never slid into that for me - he was willing to occasionally be at least slightly underhanded when the situation called for it, and while he expected Charn to be better (and read him to filth when he caught him out lying to and manipulating him), he thankfully also seemed to understand the fine art of compromise. Plus he's really pretty. Both of them are really pretty.

But the thing that I never expected was just how hard I turned around on Thaenthai. He drove me absolutely bonkers for the first few eps, and I was loudly annoyed by the fact that after about ep three (if not sooner), it became clear that he was not the one who had hit Tonkhao but that he was being made to take the blame. It felt to me like the show wanted me to excuse how vile he was (acting like Tonkhao's death was nothing, beating the crap out of Tinn when he was already tied up and helpless, just generally acting like a spoiled, entitled, horrible shitstain of a human being) because his father beat him. And while that was horrifying and I wanted him to get the hell out of there as soon as possible I still felt that a worm is a worm is a worm, even if the worm's father happens to be worse.

But then the show went and did something I did not expect it to do: it didn't just tell us that Thaenthai was lashing out because he was caught in a desperate limbo of wanting to run away from his and wanting to please him, but it went and did the work to show it. I started turning around on him after he found out about the gardener his father used as a scapegoat once things started getting heated, because we finally got to catch him before he had time to put on his mask. And it just kept coming, because now we knew what to look for. He's still an ass for beating the shit out of Tinn when he was tied up though, lol.

Another thing I really loved that this sow did with him was show him loving his dad in spite of everything. This man beat him, nearly drowned him, let him take the blame for a murder he did, tried to kill the only person Thaenthai felt was really on his side (because I do think that the intent was always to kill Thee - I'm just not entirely sure why it didn't happen as soon as Thaenthai got on that plane. I guess because we needed a happier ending. I am not complaining), and told him to his face that he could never love him because he killed his mother, and yet Thaenthai still loved him, still wanted his attention and his respect and his love in return. And it just rang very painfully true to me. You don't stop loving your parents because they're shit, and humans for some reason tend to be wired to try harder for love that is hard to receive (or impossible, in this case). It did not surprise me that Thaentha tried to visit his father in prison, or that he was sad when he died. But neither did it surprise me that something in him seemed looser in those scenes as well, because even though he loved his dad there's a part of him that's glad he's gone.

I love stuff like this, because it's so complicated and realistic and it hurts in a way that only something that resonates with reality can. I ate it up.

Shout out as well to Not Vorarit, because he really did a good job with Thatthep. The way he slowly unraveled as the show went on was pitch perfect, every little nuance from his first intro as the shady but possibly not *that* shady "concerned" parent right up until that last scene with Charn where he's just a cackling monster. Kudos, you created an excellently detestable character. Watching him get his comeuppance was certainly a highlight of the show for me.

I was also really into the way that Tonkhao was very much a main character despite the fact that she died so early. One of the best strengths of this show was the way that it never let us forget what started this whole thing, it showed Tinn and Grandma grieving for their little girl, talking about her, missing her. Being reminded of her around every corner. They kept her in the forefront of our minds exactly the way that they should have, and I was delighted by it.

Other fun notables are himbo ex Nawin and Rose and Maya, our GL couple that I wish had gotten a little more screen time *as* a couple but either way were fabulous. I will love this show forever for introducing Nawin in the final hour and making him such a great combination of ridiculous and ruthless. And the way they let him breathe as a character - they really just stood back and were like "look at this ridiculous man stealing the show" and it was amazing. And Rose was just - she was such a good friend to Charn the whole way through, and both her and Maya's utter delight for him when he found Tinn (and them welcoming not only him but grandma into their little family so readily) warmed my cynical heart. And I will watch Sylvie Pavida in pretty much anything, I think.

All this raving and yet I still have to go with a final score of 9/10. I recommend this show, it's way better than I thought it would be, but there are some questionable choices made, the CGI and the fight scenes are laughable (the fire at Charn's office made me laugh so hard I had to pause), and they pulled out a guitar and sang not once, but twice. And they don't even have the excuse that one of them is supposed to be a singer. Also frankly nowadays every Thai show I watch I have to ask myself "did I enjoy this more than Moonlight Chicken?" which I only gave a 9.5, and for this one, the answer was no. So 9 it is, but a highly recommended 9. This was so much fun and it will be very missed on Saturdays.

Currently Watching

Be Mine Superstar - I really do not get why they have decided to give the doom eleventh episode to this drama. It makes such little sense from this couple, who are the least dramatic pairing possible. They should have just left the angst to Muang and the doc.

Speaking of which, I have been disappointed with that storyline. I feel like we went from nothing to boyfriends with no real development, and now that they're not boyfriends again we're supposed to care, and I just don't.

Also Title is really out here doing the most. My dude, can't you just bow the fuck out gracefully? Blergh him and the manger stuff is still really annoying. Kevin was a delight though. Even though that's one too many dudes thirsty for Ashi for my personal taste (although he is very pretty so I totally get it).

Hidden Agenda - I actually kind of loved how ridiculous the conflict between Joke and Zo wound up being. Oh sure, Pat helping Joke along was a betrayal of trust or whatever, but it just felt perfect for the kind of drama this is. I get the idea that it felt like a betrayal of trust, but I also don't really get how it was too much different from what Zo was trying to do with Nita. Whatever, I love my low stakes drama on Sundays, keep it coming Hidden Agenda.

Kiseki: Dear to Me - This show is doing what I wanted from Only Friends and giving me all the cameos. The way I yelled when I saw the two from history: make Our Days Count. I think my favorite is Ai Di - poor little ball of adoration and pettiness and jealousy. I adore him. Oh, and that scene in the spa was great - I loved how everyone was looking at everyone else while the episode's guest stars (HI, Be Loved in House I Do guys! Good to see you) side eyed the lot of 'em. Me too, my friends. Me too. They're all messy and in love with everyone else and I am here for this weird quadrangle.

The main couple has less of a chokehold on me, but I like our uptight, traumatized doctor to be. And okay, yes, it got me with his unwilling return to a solitary life after Ze Rui disappeared on him. My guess is we're gonna speed run to the imprisonment and amnesia in the synopsis, and I'm good with that. I hope the cameos continue, but even if they don't I'm really enjoying this.

Taikan Yoho / My Personal Weatherman - I saw this called live action yaoi and at first didn’t really believe it, but no. No, it really is. And I am *here* for it. I can't say it's my favorite thing airing right now but I'm enjoying it.

The Jungle - (not a BL, so I'm cheating here, ah well) I don't know who thought that what we needed was four entire episodes of Pine's manpain, but they were very wrong. At least for my money. On the bright side, August is gorgeous and Pat is killing it. The series has been uneven for me and I'm a little annoyed they apparently want to wrap up Pine's BS, Nathee and Florence, *and* address Hunter's backstory in just two eps. But eh, whatever, I was only ever really watching for the women and Mix and thankfully Hack and Irin gave me all the mess that was promised (and not really delivered on, unfortunately. Not that I wanted a bunch of assholes womanizing, but aside from freaking Pine everyone's stories wrapped up in a couple of episodes of mostly no mess at all).

Looking Forward To

23.5 - Come on GMMTV get this thing out already I want it. I have been patient but come oooooon. I had three highly anticipated dramas for this line up and this is the only one that hasn't been released yet and I want it. Gimme my GL.

Absolute Zero (Sep 27, iQiYI)- this is gonna hurt but at least I know it going in?

The Box (Sep 22, not sure about where) - Not a BL, but looks like a good time. Plus I'm interested to see Prem in a thriller - I think he'll do well.

I am also wondering what will replace the Monday/Tuesday hole The Jungle will leave when it stops airing or if they plan to do reruns.

And apparently we're getting the GMMTV 2024 lineup in Oct this year, which seems really early but maybe I'm wrong. I didn’t actually pay attention to the 2023 lineup until way after it came out so I can’t be trusted. *whispers* please let Midnight Museum have a season two, please let Midnight Museum have a season two.

#stay by my side #wedding plan #jun & jun #laws of attraction #be mine superstar #kiseki: dear to me #hidden agenda #taikan yoho #the jungle #23.5 the series #absolute zero #the box #midnight museum #my personal weatherman #not really micro micro bl reviews

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fierceawakening · 1 year

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Funny thing that just happened:

I was watching one of those “is your family member narcissistic” videos, this one about apologies. And the person claimed that it’s rare for narcissistic people to offer apologies that include taking responsibility for what they did, instead saying things like “I’m sorry you feel that way.”

And I’m just thinking… some months ago I defended “I’m sorry that you feel that way,” saying that the person could mean “I didn’t think I’d set you off, but knowing how it came off to you, it’s no surprise that what I said did, and that was hurtful even if I wasn’t going for that.”

But as I listened to the YouTube I realized I’m not sure if my mom ever has said “when I said x it was hurtful, that’s on me.” I’ve heard her say “I own it,” but only about decisions that had mixed consequences. Never about how things she says made people feel.

And that I was probably defending “I’m sorry that you feel that way” because I’ve heard it so many times I just think “yeah, that’s how you phrase it when you had no clue they’d take it that way.”

Anyway, I had asked dad recently whether she seemed even more petty than usual, and while he usually defends her he agreed, and even said that he’d made a mistake (I thought he and I were seeing Barbie together; he invited her and she was angry he’d dragged her along the whole time. The movie was great but the sudden presence of annoyed person was not. She snapped at me IN THE MOVIE THEATER when I got confused about something. “Oooohhhh this is gonna be so fun *eyeroll*” and it bothered me she did that in front of people. I did shit all to deserve that.)

He said he was upset that she doesn’t participate in things as a family unless she thought of them and was trying to help her grow. (I said I think this is a fixed pattern and we should just involve her less. It’s selfish but it’s not gonna change without HER rethinking.)

Anyway. I thought that was the end of it.

Then she called me to apologize. Because Dad told her I was hurt, of course.

So I decided to do what the YouTube said and listen for any kind of owning it.

She said “Dad told me I upset you. I’m sorry. My allergies are just really bothering me lately and I’m all out of sorts.”

🤦🏽

I didnt argue, but I did say “Yeah, I was kinda hurt. I don’t think snapping at me was called for.”

She never said “yeah, that wasn’t very nice” or anything. She let me say it and said “okay,” but never responded that she agreed or even understood.

Maybe “narcissistic” is the wrong word for the thing because this isn’t how people with the PD act. (Though in all their posts about how abuse isn’t narcissistic I never see them set the record straight about what their behavior actually IS instead, and why its effects are not lastingly hurtful where abuse is. Which makes me kind of smell a rat.)

But fuck if whatever it’s supposed to be called it’s not accurate as William Tell for me.

Wow.

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baby-yaga · 6 months

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yesterday, post burial, on our way back to the church to grab a plant, my mom told me, "love him for who he was, dont hate him for who he wasnt. thats the best way to go through life without baggage." and i get where she was coming from, but i dont think thats right.

sometimes people say that the opposite of love isnt hate, its indifference. i did love my dad. i also hated him. they never cancelled each other out. i can love him for his warmth, his humor, his intelligence, his gregariousness, and still hate him for his absence, the abuse, the neglect, how he gave so much of himself to everyone else but his 3 children.

im haunted by my mom telling me that my dad once told her, "if i knew then what i know now, we never wouldve gotten divorced." i cant even picture what that wouldve been like. there was a brief period after my dad left his late wife, where he was living with us again. my parents werent together, it was basically a roommates situation, and in all honesty it was the best part of my teen years.

we had all been through a lot. his late wife was abusive to pretty much everyone in her life, except when she was passed out on oxy. i was deeply resentful of my dad remaining married to her despite how horribly she treated my brother and i, and also him. when she passed away, we were all having dinner with my sister, and when my dad told trey and i what happened, i think it was really shocking to him that we looked at each other, and replied, "good."

but when he lived with us again, it was weird, but it wasnt bad. i liked having him around all the time. i liked getting to spend time with him for real. he picked me up from school, we ate dinner together, watched movies, i started going to the gym with him. we were living together when i went on my first date ever. we were living together when i came out to him. we were living together when i tried to kill myself.

but it didnt last forever. he moved in with a new girlfriend eventually. he kept it a secret, so when he moved in without telling me before hand, i was so mad. i wouldnt go over to their place, a duplex that was less than 5 minutes from our house. i wouldnt meet his girlfriend. i think i was hurt beyond words that he was breaking up our family again, but i didnt realize that until just now.

he tried to force it one night, wanted to ground me if i didnt come. we got into a tug of war match over my laptop in the entry way. i was so frustrated, hurt, i felt so un-heard, i screamed, "i hate you! i never want to see you again!"

he looked surprised. then, he looked devastated. he put down my laptop gently on the entryway table, and left without a word.

he called that night, and explained himself. he said something like, "a friends son passed away recently. i just dont want to lose our relationship."

i said, "im sorry that happened, dad. but i wish you wouldnt try to make me feel bad just because you feel bad."

he replied, "so im just supposed to feel miserable by myself?"

i dont remember what i said exactly. it was something to the effect of, "fine! keep making everyone around you miserable, until you have no one around but yourself!" i slammed the phone down. this was in like, 2008 or so, so we still had a landline, lol.

we didnt speak for 2 weeks. he picked up my brother to come sleep at his place, didnt speak to me, and then would leave. i didnt know that what i wanted was for him to move back in for good. it wasnt reasonable, really. he wanted to date, i think he felt weird about it while living with my mother, and also he didnt have his own room, he was sleeping in a bunk bed with my brother. so i understand now why him moving out happened. but at the time i was so upset hed kept it a secret from me. i still think that was the wrong move. if hed been open about it, given me some time to adjust without springing it on me, it mightve gone a little smoother.

anyway, the night i spoke to him again. he was coming over to pick up trey again. i started crying and threw myself at him. i said i was sorry over and over. i missed him so much. i loved him so much. i just wanted him to be my dad again.

he just held me, and rocked me back and forth. he kissed the top of my head and said, "its ok, its ok." we stood like that for a long time, until i stopped crying. i met his new girlfriend that night. they showed me the room theyd prepared, a bed and everything, for my brother and i to share. it was the first time id ever had a place to stay at his house. before, i was sleeping on the couch, or, when my step-brother was in basic training, i got to sleep on his futon. it meant so much to me.

i miss him. ive missed him my whole life, it seems. missing him isnt new. but this is different. it feels like theres an empty pit inside of me that i was positive was bottomless, but its somehow gotten deeper.

#dead dad saga

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lyranova · 2 years

Note

It's still 30th of November were I live, so I maybe I'm still in time. I don't know if it's too much to ask, but wouldn't you mind writing a little something about Vanessa telling Nozel that she's pregnant? Sorry, but I discovered this ship thanks to the very first fic you wrote about them and you're one of the reasons why they're now in my top 10 Black Clover ships, but you don't need to write it if you don't wanna.

Hiya anon! When I got this ask it was still the 30th for me as well so you sent it in right on time 😁! I try to give everyone a bit of extra time since we all live in different timezones so even if I get a request a little bit late I’ll let it slide 😅! Agwjwjwhbwejwh thank you I’m so glad you enjoyed my Vanzel oneshots 🥺😭, luckily you’ll be well fed for a while (as will other Vanzel shippers) since I have quite a few requests for them recently 😁! But anyway I hope you enjoy this oneshot, it actually came out longer than I had expected it to be 😂!

Word Count: 1,641

Warnings: Pregnancy

———

Vanessa let out a soft sigh as she left Owen’s office, she hadn’t been feeling very well the past few days and had assumed it was a stomach virus or some other type of illness that had been going around recently. But what Owen told her was not what she had been expecting to hear.

“ It looks like you're pregnant Vanessa.”

Those words repeated over and over in her head, it was quite a shock, but not a bad one if she were being honest. She had imagined becoming a mom one day, although she wasn’t expecting it to be so soon.

She sighed as she quickly walked towards her broom, she knew she would have to tell her husband. But she also knew he was busy right now with the Magic Knight entrance exams and would probably be busier the next few days as the squad welcomed the new members.

As Vanessa reached out to grab her broom she heard a couple of familiar voices approach.

“ If it isn’t our older brothers girlfriend, what brings you to the castle?” Solid Silva, Nozel’s brother asked as he and Nebra Silva, Nozel’s sister, walked up to her.

“ Isn’t it obvious? She’s probably here to see dear Nozel.” Nebra said with a soft giggle, and Vanessa laughed awkwardly. She didn’t want to tell them the real reason she was at the castle, so she would let the two believe what they wanted.

“ Ah, is that so? Well our eldest brother just went back to his office, we have 4 new recruits from the Entrance exam so he’s finishing up some of the paperwork and room assignments.” Solid said as he jerked his thumb towards the Silver Eagles base.

“ But I’m sure he’d love to see you though, especially since you two won’t see much of each other for a while.” Nebra told her with a warm smile, The pink haired mage nodded and decided to go visit him since she was in the area anyway.

“ I think I’ll do that. I’ll see you two later.” Vanessa told them with a cheerful smile, trying to act as she usually did. She quickly walked past the two and headed straight for Nozel’s office.

——

The walk seemed to take a lot longer than it usually did. Maybe it was because she had so much on her mind? She shrugged a bit. Vanessa was debating whether or not she should tell Nozel now or wait until his work was finished with the new recruits. On the one hand if she told him now she was worried he’d be distracted, but on the other hand she worried he would be upset that she didn’t tell him the day she found out.

She shook her head, she really had no idea what to do.

Vanessa stopped as she stood outside her boyfriend’s office door, it felt like her heart was beating right out of her chest. She quickly took a deep breath, put her usual smile on her face, and knocked on the door.

“ Come in.” She heard her husband say on the other side, she slowly opened the door and poked her head around.

“ Is this a bad time?” Vanessa asked casually as she crossed her arms and leaned against the door, she watched as Nozel looked up from his papers and looked at her in surprise.

“ Of course not,” Nozel started, but after Vanessa cut him a knowing look he sighed. “ Alright maybe it is a bit of a bad time, but I was just about to take a break anyway.” He added with an exhausted sigh.

Vanessa chuckled before she walked inside and gently closed the door behind her. She walked over to his desk and sat on the edge of it.

“ You deserve the break, especially since you’ll be busier than usual with four new recruits.” Vanessa said with a small smirk, Nozel sighed again and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“ As happy as I am to have squad members, I can’t help but be a little irritated as that means a lot more paperwork.” He muttered and Vanessa laughed again, it seemed that her procrastination had slightly rubbed off on the Captain.

“ Ah well, you could also forget the paperwork and just spend time with me instead.” She teased as she leaned towards him, she watched as a very faint blush appeared on his cheeks.

“ As much as I would love to, I can’t right now. I have too much work to do.” He told her as he quickly cleared his throat.

“ But,” Nozel continued, his voice a bit softer. “ Maybe once I finish all this work, we can spend some time together…” he added as he gave her a knowing look, Vanessa chuckled as she leaned away and crossed her arms.

“ Aah, so you want a ‘reward’ for completing your work?” She asked teasingly, she watched as his blush deepened and he cleared his throat again. She shook her head as a smile appeared on her face, she leaned down and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “ Alright. Once you finish your work I’ll give you a reward.”

Vanessa moved and sat down in the soft chair that was on the other side of the desk. She watched in amusement as Nozel seemed to fly through all his paperwork.

As she listened to his quill scratch against the paper and the papers rustling together as he placed them to the side, the pink haired witch’s mind began to wander.

She was going to be a mom, and Nozel was going to be a dad. She tilted her head slightly as she tried to imagine it. She had a feeling he would be a pretty good one, he’d be stern, but would love his kids unconditionally. He would treat them the way they were supposed to be treated, and he would try not to make the same mistakes he made with Noelle when she was young.

“ Something on your mind? You’ve been staring at me for a while.” He asked while not looking up from his papers, Vanessa shook her head.

“ It’s nothing. I was just thinking about how you'd make a good father someday.” She told him, she watched as he suddenly paused his writing.

“ ‘A good dad’? You think…I’d be a good dad? I’m not so sure.” He admitted softly, Vanessa frowned as Nozel’s tone grew serious.

“ I wasn’t a good older brother, I wasn’t a good son, so how am I going to be a good father? Especially when you consider how terrible my own father was.” Nozel muttered, still not looking up from his desk. Vanessa could see that there was self doubt and uncertainty in his voice and on his face.

It was an unusual look.

“ That-.” Vanessa tried to argue but Nozel held up a hand to stop her.

“ You know it’s true, so please don’t try to argue. Yes it’s true that I’ve changed and that I’m trying to make up for the wrongs that I’ve done, but it doesn’t cancel out the bad that I’ve done.” He told her softly, Nozel watched as Vanessa stood up and walked over to him. She sat down on the edge of his desk again, turned his chair to face her, and she placed her hands on either side of his face to make him look at her.

“ You’re right that it doesn’t cancel out the bad that you’ve done. But if people were able to forgive Captain Vangeance for what he did, why can’t your siblings forgive you? More importantly, why can’t you forgive yourself?” She asked with a raised brow. “ You’ve atoned and made up for what you did. So don’t you think it’s time you forgave yourself?”

She watched as Nozel’s purple eyes searched hers, what she said was true. That it was time to forgive himself, especially since now Noelle had forgiven him. But still…it would take some time.

“ As far as the ‘becoming a good dad’ thing, it takes time to be a good dad. Just like it takes time to be a good mom. But luckily for us,” She paused for a minute before continuing. “ We have nine or ten months to figure out how to be good parents.”

Vanessa watched as a confused look crossed the Captain’s face. It started out as confusion and then, once her words sunk in, she watched his face change and it became almost unreadable.

“ ‘We have nine or ten months’? Then…does that mean…?” He asked softly, and Vanessa nodded. She clenched the edge of Nozel’s desk as her nerves took over, she couldn’t recall the last time she had been so nervous about someone's reaction.

Nozel suddenly stood up and just…stared at her. She quickly looked away as it made her nerves even worse. Was he angry? Or was he upset? She knew the situation wasn’t ideal. They would probably be talked about due to him being a royal and her a witch, and there’d be terrible rumors about them since the two weren’t married.

Vanessa didn’t care about any of that, but she knew Nozel had no other choice but to care about it, since he was a royal and was a potential candidate for Wizard King.

Nozel suddenly leaned towards her and wrapped his arms around her in a gentle hug, Vanessa was a bit taken aback by the action, but at the same time she felt this wave of relief wash over her.

“ I’m…going to be a father?” He asked her softly, and when she nodded she felt his grip around her tighten slightly.

The two sat together quietly, neither one saying a word. Instead they just let the news sink in, news that they were going to be parents. It was something neither of them expected, but they welcomed it wholeheartedly regardless.

———

Thank you all so much for reading and I hope you all have a good day~!

#asks #anon 🌟#black clover #black clover oneshot #black clover ships #black clover fanfic #black clover fanfiction #vanzel #nozel x vanessa #vanessa x nozel #nozel silva #vanessa enoteca #nozel black clover #black clover vanessa

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babydinojojo · 1 month

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Day 18(8/12/24)

Man, a lot has happened in this past month and shit. Some good, some bad, some I don't fuckin know. Well let's start with the good.

Summer youth finally ended and shit thank god I don't have to go back to that hell hole if a camp ever again, and I'm glad I'm also away from them annoying little spoiled brats, and bro when I say their brain rot is really bad, IT'S BAD! Bro I kid you not these kids were saying "What the sigma" "Skibbdi" and shit and like... Is their generation really fuckin screwed???? These fuckin kids bro were spoiled like how do y'all have iPads at such a young age :/, and not to mention this kid named Ky and that girls table was nice until they got to the last two weeks. The boys table was just straight up annoying, Yes Rohan you were annoying especially nigga always got 15 minutes off gym EVERY FUCKING day except the last 2 days he was here. If I'm being honest here I'd never work with kids again in anyway shape and/or form again.

Me and Vanni celebrated our one year anniversary two weeks ago today, and yea we did a movie sorta marathon, but I enjoyed it at least! We watched this movie, well I forgot what it was called, but it was like this guy had DiD and Vann Vann mentioned how Will was meant to be like this except the DiD part. Well we also got our relationship back on track after..... THAT happened and hey we've been going strong for the past month and frankly I haven't really talked to anyone but her in the past couple of months. I've kinda cut off my friends and sorta just surrounded myself with her, and frankly I'm glad I did, my friends would've just gotten in the way of everything, they're nothing but burdens on me, and hell I don't even consider some of them real fuckin friends. I mean me and Angel still talk but that ain't nothing really, we was close but not anymore and frankly I'm ok with it.

I haven't told Vanni this yet, but I recently discovered what's been preventing me from regressing as of lately. It's my brother, surprise surprise, he's been preventing me from regressing, and it just makes me sad cause he never treats me with any sorts of respect nor does my sister. She hates me for legit no reason at all, and I never did anything to her. Yesterday she fuckin hit me on the head for legitimately no reason and shit and frankly I'm tired of the way she treats me. I never did anything to her at all and I'm frankly confused in why she treats me like this. It's like my sister and brother are both against me for no reason.

Jayden got a new girlfriend, and deadass I fucking hate her annoying ass. They always calling each and EVERY moment of every day and it's like bro why???? I don't call Vanni every waking minute of the day, and yet he does????? Mom tried to do something about it yesterday and she lectured him about him treating me like my equal... Yea you wonder why my grades lower than usual. It's cause of that dumbass. Nigga is ALWAYS on the phone late fucking night and I'm always so damn sleepy to the point where I always forget things or overlook things sometimes this is just ridiculous. Mom rarely does anything about it, and she just lectures him and shit and don't really do anything about it, she just tells him to go to bed and shit and never just.... This is just making me upset just talking about it...

Tigger Warning: Contents from here might involve Depression/Suicidal thoughts/Self Harm

I always had this thought on myself lately where I was just a burden to everyone I know, and even to Vanni, and it's like... I don't know why people want to be around me at this point... I overlook shit, I don't listen, I'm a overweight piece of shit who does nothing but slob away on the couch/in his room all day, and lately every day waking up and getting out of bed has been feeling like a chore. I always let everyone down, I let my parents down with my bad grades and the fact I weight the exact weight as my mom..., my sister hates me for no reason...., my brother doesn't even care about my feelings, I'm always gaslighted or manipulated by everyone in they mother, It's just... I feel like nobody cares about my feelings or ask how I'm doing. I always ask people and shit how they're doing, but yet they never did the same for me....

You know if they're one thing that comforts me at night, it's just... there's an escape from this world. I already planned it out in my head, but it'll never happen cause I don't wanna commit offing myself...

On one faithful day, I was gonna pull up to school but put my stuff down in the library and watch some of the last YouTube videos I'll ever watch... I order a lunch from the cheesecake factory and pick it up from there, and it's a very big meal. It'll be my last one after all. I'll eat it slowly and savor every last bite eating slowly... once I finish it and my drink along with my snacks... I'll say my final goodbyes to my parents, my siblings, and my friends.... and then Vanni.... it'll be one of the most heartbreaking, and gut wrenching goodbyes I would ever give someone... The amount of times I would apologize for doing this too her... But I can't take it anymore..... I wouldn't block her, and since she'll have access to all my social medias I'll give her full control of them from here on out... I love you Vanni... Always and forever... Please cherish the memories and love we've had for each other and thank you being apart of my life, I'll always be forever grateful for it... You really made one of the biggest impacts in my life and I thank you for trying each and everyday and for taking care of yourself... I'll see you in the next life one day Vanni... You'll have control of all my social medias from this day on you can do whatever you please.... After that final goodbye to Vanni... I'll delete my discord, and instagram accounts and uninstall the apps. I'll put my phone into my bag and leave the bag as I slowly walk out of the library and take one last look at the school I went to.... I walked myself to the Bryant Park train station and took a few trains too the East River... I jumped into the water and go deep effectively ending my pain.... As my soul leaves this world never to return...

But then again.... I have so much to live for after all. If I committed suicide I would be hurting everyone who loved me and cared about me to begin with. I can't do that to Vanni or my family.... I don't know I just feel depressed and sad at the moment, and if you come to think of it... I guess I did it too myself.

Onto the next Journal entry... or to emotionally manipulated or gaslighted because I don't know how to speak up for myself for Jack shit! Fuck my life man

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the-diary-of-an-introvert · 3 months

Text

Recently I’ve reconnected with my little sister on my dad’s side.

She’s sixteen now and I’m hoping she understands why I was absent for so long.

She says she’s does.. but sometimes I just get worried that she completely blames me.

I’m not saying that I’m not to blame.. I could have tried harder. I could have put up with my dad’s antics. I could have just dealt with it long enough for her to turn 18 so she could have made the choice herself.

However, I couldn’t. He always wanted me to change everything about myself. He wanted me to do everything he wanted me to do. All the way down to the college I went to, the man I was engaged to. He wanted me to cut off my mom’s whole side of my family.. which, I get it. I eventually ended up doing anyways. However, I needed to be the one who made that decision all on my own.

And you’re probably wondering or thinking, he’s your dad. He was just trying to do what’s best for you.

Not necessarily. My dad was always in and out of my life. I would do something super small and he would lose his shit and decide that he never wanted to talk to me or see me again.

He would drop me off back into front of my grandparents house with all the crap he had bought me, in tears and completely confused.

There was one time in particular where he got mad because my step mom at the time started messaging me on MySpace.. yeah, I was THAT young. She baited me into saying something that upset him and told him about it.

I immediately heard him start yelling and he forced me to pack up the room he had made for me into trash bags and again, took me back to my maternal grandparents house.

Surprise though, my grandparents weren’t even home. Neither were my brothers. I was locked out of the house scared to death…

Thankfully one of our neighbors, whose kids we played with often found me and brought me into her home. She comforted me and let me call my grandparents. She just so happened to also have my little brother with her. So I’m guessing they hadn’t been gone long.

But can you imagine the fear that I went through in that moment? I was twelve years old. I was terrified.

He didn’t even stick around long enough to make sure I got inside okay. What kind of parent or even decent adult does that to a child?

Then there was the thing with his friend.. we’ll call him Joe. He was 20. I was 15 almost 16.

It had been the magical number of two years and my dad came back around wanting to get to know each other again.. he took me and my little sister, who was 3 or 4 at the time to San Antonio along with my step mom.

We had a great time. Things were going so well this time and I had so much hope that I would continue.

However, one night Joe was over hanging out with us. I thought he was cool. The dude was hecka tall. I was and am still only 5 feet tall. So he was a giant to me.

We got close, like sibling or cousins do. He was the only person close-ish to my age that I could hang out with. I mean, I loved hanging out with my sister.. but she was little. And yeah.

Anyways, one night I went to bed early. I was watching a movie about to fall asleep and he came in. He asked if he could watch the movie with me and I said yeah. Which, all honesty, I’m surprised I even chose to sleep in my actual room that night because I usually would just sleep on my sister’s top bunk.. but for whatever reason, I chose not to this time.

Anyways, he went from sitting on the edge of my bed to laying down next to me, then he got under the covers and began to touch me. Rubbing me all over until eventually he put his hand in my pants.

I didn’t know what to do, I didn’t want my dad to hate me because this was his friend. Things had been going so well between us and I just didn’t want to cause any problems and make him hate me again.. so I just pretended to be dead asleep. Yeah, I know.

Not the smartest thing to do.. but still.

And don’t get me wrong, I lost my virginity when I was 14. However, I had dated that guy for like a year. And honestly, it had only happened once. There was a time before the initial one time, but we apparently didn’t do it right and yeah… so technically one and half?

And it wasn’t anything like leading up to something. It legit was, in, out. It lasted like 3 minutes.

I had never been touched or caressed the way that Joe had done to me. Or even touched down there by a boy with their hand.

Anyways, the next day I decide that I HAVE to tell my dad and stepmom.

So I do.

My dad legit laughed at me and said, “are you sure? I think you may have been dreaming.”

And he never took it seriously. I didn’t want to press the issue because, again, I didn’t want him to hate me.

I never spoke about it again. I never told my grandparents because I just assumed that they would have the same reaction my dad did.. and again, I didn’t want to lose my dad again.

Anyways, I figured I’d give some background about me and my dad so that everyone could understand why there is so much animosity here.

Once my little sister was born, he continuously used her as a weapon to hurt me even further.i waited over 13 years for a little sister.. when she was born, i felt like my life was complete.. even though she was born early and was so small and fragile, I loved her with everything in me. I always wanted to be there for her and protect her from anything bad that could possibly happen to her.

Unfortunately, my dad put up all these walls and kept us away from each other..

He let his issue with his CHILD get between me and my sister. Yes, I don’t care what anyone says, he was the adult, I was the child. He was the parent. He should have protected me.. instead, he became one of the people who hurt me most in the world.

Anyways, my sister is 16 now. Her mom and our dad divorced years ago. She lives with her mom and thankfully her mom finally realized everything he was doing and how he influenced her. We’ve somewhat made amends, I never honestly never blamed her. I know that she was being hurt just as much as I was.

I remember this one time, I was maybe like, 8 or 9. They lived in the little 3 bedroom house. I don’t remember where it was. I do remember it was close to my grandparents because the drive wasn’t that long.

Anyways, he and my step mom were arguing and he started throwing glass vases everywhere and at her. I stayed in my room because I was scared. I remember sticking my head out because I was curious, and I just remember my step mom side stepping a flying vase that almost hit her in the head.

I closed my door then and just sat on my bed waiting for it to stop.

So yeah, we no longer harbor any resentments towards my step mom. She had it most likely 100% worse than me as she lived with him everyday.

Anyways, my sister is 16 now.

She’s a young writer, like I was. 🥰

She’s been working on a book and has asked me to help her with it. So we’ve been bonding over it.

I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy or excited about something in my life.

I’ve waited 16 years to have a good solid relationship with my sister.. and it’s finally happening. I’ll be 30 this year, better later than never.

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sleeplessvalley · 1 year

Text

god I'm letting someone else front after I'm done typing this, I just need to express it or I'm going to pop like a balloon

like fucking

I have early memories scattered everywhere

in 1st grade where a kid insulted my shirt (and I still hold the grudge for some reason)

the time when we were making a little neighborhood with milk cartons on the floor in 1st grade and I knocked a little toy car into it; nothing even happened to the carton houses but I got yelled at for it. other people had knocked things off their tables into it and were only told gently to go in and pick it up

the many, many, MANY times my writing stuff would go missing from my desk, from 1st grade to 5th, and if it happened to anyone else it was always to the other 'weird' kids

1st grade, we were doing the 'who took the cookies from the cookie jar' with the whole class and the teacher just skipped over me

1st grade, a couple of kids would run away from me whenever I tried to play with them. naturally I chased them because I wanted to talk to them and shit, but they wouldn't even give me the chance to talk and I do remember them both calling me names

how MY ENTIRE CLASS aside from one girl (who moved to oregon before the next schoolyear started) in 2nd grade thought I was weird and I knew, just knew, that people were avoiding me the whole year. when she moved I also had only one friend until 4th grade.

3rd grade. in its entirety. was awful. my teacher then was strict but she hated me in particular, made me feel awful for not knowing how to read a clock of all things because nobody told me how, and having difficulty with a research project on leaves (such a long story), various classmates humiliated me and my wax museum project, the nurse would get upset with me for not taking my asthma medication. there's so much stuff that happened in this year alone and I don't remember all of it, but I remember a lot of tears both at school and at home because my mom would get angry with me.

I also remember in 2nd and 3rd grade I was put into some little program during school that I thought everyone went to and only just recently realized it was for problem kids, what with all the board and card games on being a good kid and being nice to others and stuff. this continued until 5th grade, and then in 6th until I graduated highschool I was switched over to the school therapists

a girl in 4th grade telling me she was a better girlfriend than I was in regards to a kid we were both friends with. I wasn't interested in him and told her we were just friends, she insisted I was and this quite literally led to her and her friend group bullying me from 4th grade through to 11th (it would've been until my last day of highschool but covid hit us in march of 11th grade, which is. something I shouldn't have to be thankful towards a virus for)

one boy in my 4th grade class just yelling at me that I was weird and that I should leave him and others alone

as mentioned prior, from partway through 2nd grade until 4th grade, I had one friend. a group of girls invited me to sit with them for lunch one day near the start of the year and I thought finally, this is it, these are going to be my friends, they seem to like me. this is a surprise tool that will help us later.

various other things in this year that I also don't remember. sums up to more tears at school and at home.

by fucking 5th grade. 5th grade. I was saying that I wanted to kill myself and seeing an OUTSIDE therapist for that

5th grade is also the year when everything started going downhill. near daily I'd get yelled at by my teacher, or my mom, or the afterschool people, for forgetting something in my classroom. usually a piece of homework. only here did my mom really start noticing all the problems I was having, and she thought it was a goddamn developmental thing that could be fixed? so she took me to a neurologist and that's how I got my ADHD diagnosis. I remember none of it but she tells me the story. of how she went with me, the doctors said that, and her response. which is and I shit you not "how can that be, my kid has been fine and suddenly it's a complete 180 compared to before". never got support for that. still haven't, probably never going to.

I'm not even getting into everything that came after in detail. all that's important is that in the middle of 2016 I was put on an anxiety medication, it completely fucked me over and made me depressed, shortly after 8th grade started I lost everyone who even tolerated me at the time, and I wanted to commit suicide so badly that it resulted in the only time I've ever tried to harm myself. got suspended from school and sent to a mental hospital, then was playing catch-up for a month.

all that.

all that, and I sit here going 'I don't have very bad trauma. there was one incident in 2016, but nothing more than that' while continually thinking all my abnormal responses to things now are normal.

and I sit here having gone 'but how could I have OSDD. how could I have ASPD. it doesn't make sense, I've had a pretty normal time' in the past.

#daitex.t #mlergh #safety pins for imperfections #suicide mention #kids are... really good communicators. and I say this because I've worked at summer camps before #if not one but SEVERAL kids come up to me and say 'I don't want to play with [x] for [reason]'#then either there's a behavior that needs to stop. or the kid in question is wired differently.#and in cases of the latter it tends to be worse #god. I just. I haven't had trauma as bad as some others with DID/OSDD do #but I absolutely have trauma!#like wow. I wonder why there's a system member from when I was seven/eight and in third grade. this is a complete mystery.

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bokutoslittlebird · 3 years

Text

Just You and Me

Dad!Bokuto x Daughter!reader

Summary: Taking a trip to a cabin in the middle of nowhere isn’t how you expected to spend your week of vacation, yet somehow Bokuto convinced you. In an unfamiliar place, you end up getting spooked and go to the only other person for help, even if your feelings tend to be a bit different from what they should be.

Warnings: incest, Bokuto in sweats, dubcon, grinding/frottage, nipple play, pussyjob, daddy kink/ddlg, f. oral receiving, creampie, squirting, possessiveness, bit of overstimulation

Watching trees pass by as songs play on the radio and you in the front seat of your dad’s newest off-road car is not how you expected this week to go by when you received news of getting a week off. Your university had been warning students of construction and they decided to give everyone, including staff, the next week off. It was a blessing to students like you, wishing for a break from the studious coursework.

Bokuto had greeted you that evening like he had been doing it for years. In reality, your dad was only a recently retired professional volleyball player, making his presence in your life scarce as he had bigger things to work on. You didn’t blame him for not putting in a lot of effort in raising you, of course. He had an entire career to focus on, plus the money to take care of a kid. When he retired, he ended up trying to actually interact with you, encouraging you to come home and spend some time with him, seeing as he made ‘too much’ for dinner. You sometimes came home, if you didn’t have lots of work, but this break meant you’d be home for more than just a night.

That was the plan, at first. Bokuto decided to tell you that the week off was perfect, telling you that his sister recently gave him her spare set of keys to the old Bokuto cabin in the woods. You told him it sounded like a horror movie, but he laughed it off and shook his head, telling you he used to go there with his family all the time during summer when he was in school. It helped him get closer to his family, especially since the connection to the outside world is a 15 minute drive from the house.

Even now, driving to the small little house, you couldn’t help but stare sadly at each passing tree and how life outside seemed to get smaller and smaller until the road got bumpy and trees parted just for you two. Bokuto tried to talk to you, but it was really more so him filling the music-silence. “You know my mom actually used to drop me off at the town we passed and I’d end up jogging 30 minutes to the cabin,”

“That sounds mean. Why’d she do it?”

“I asked her to, of course. I like running, even when I was a little brat. If she didn’t, I don’t think I’d be as athletically inclined as I am now,” he hummed, puffing his chest out like he was proud. You rolled your eyes, wishing the ride to be over.

“Surprised you know what athletically inclined means,” you mumble, then continue as he looks at you, smile dropped a bit. “Any fishing spots?”

“Actually, yeah! I didn’t bring any rods but… I think the town has some! I’ll check tomorrow morning or go by later, if you want to fish,”

“That sounds like fun,” you nod your head, getting him a bit more chipper. You’re able to read his emotions easily, switching his moods in case he gets too upset. Don’t want to be stuck with him when he’s in a bad mood, after all.

A couple more minutes of driving and Bokuto’s talking and you’re pulling up to the old cabin, set in a clearing. In the front yard, there’s a big gazebo that stands to the side, flowers growing around it. The healthy flowers confuses you, since you thought nobody came here. “Has anybody been here recently?”

“Hm? Oh, probably. Machiko spends family vacations here a lot, since Haru likes the outdoors. Rikka’s the only who gave me her spare set of keys, since she’ll be out of the country for a while and won’t need the keys,” Bokuto tells you, pulling the car into the driveway. You nod your head as you look around, seeing how well kept the place seems. For some reason, you expected it to look abandoned and overrun with greenery when Bokuto told you about how you guys hadn’t been there. However, getting out of the car, you noticed the entire front area was clean and kept well, with flower beds lining the outside — definitely something your aunt Machiko would do.

“I bet Haru does love it here. He’s always been a fan of running around and playing in dirt,” you mentioned, taking your luggage from the trunk, making Bokuto look at you.

“That’s right, you’ve actually met him!”

“Dad, I help Machiko with the parties! Of course I met him! I’ve known him since he was in diapers!” You shout back, making Bokuto laugh. Groaning, you go to leave but can’t get inside, so you wait outside with your suitcase and duffel bag. Of course, Bokuto brought four different luggage items, but he carries them easily as he closes up the car. Shaking the keys in his hand, he smiles and laughs as you put your hands on your hips, waiting for him to get to the door.

Once inside, you once more find yourself noticing how nice inside it is. The living area was nice and big, with a fireplace set in the corner and a television embedded in the wall above it. There was one couch, with two armchairs around the fireplace, and a small dining table area that led into the kitchen. Turning the corner, you looked into the kitchen and noticed how clean it looked, as if it was brand new and not decades old. “Do you like it?” You heard Bokuto say, his voice right next to your ear. Jumping, you turn around to find him looking down at you, hand on his hip as his eyes are lidded. “You look like you’ve never seen a cabin before,”

“I— well, I haven’t. I’m used to university dorms and our house, that’s pretty much it, though,” you mention. “This place is nothing like I imagined it to be,”

“Oh?”

“I expected wild animals, overrun gardens and vines covering the outside, moldy inside filled with bugs,” you list off things, making Bokuto cringe with each new thing.

“I may be a bit of a slob, but not even I’d let it go that far. Don’t worry, we keep things clean and tidy. And if there is a bug, I’ll kill it,” he gives you a thumbs up, winking.

Making a show of rolling your eyes and turning around so he can’t see your smile, you tell him “my hero.” Walking towards the back, you finally see the bedroom which although is cleaner than you expected, it still looks like it came out of a movie with the horrendous comforter designs. Bokuto’s right behind you, scanning the room. “What are you looking for?”

“Bugs, of course! Can’t have my darling daughter getting spooked, now can I?” He grins, making you cover your face. Beneath them, you can feel your face getting hot and try to shake it off. “Oh come on, it’s just a bit of teasing,” he rubs your head affectionately, then his hand moves down. You think he’s going for a hug, something you’re not used to, but instead he just removes his hand. “I’ll be in the other room, on the other side of the bathroom, okay?” He tells you before going through said bathroom, entering his own room. You sigh and shut the two doors into the bedroom, deciding to finally unpack.

Once you’re both settled in, you go exploring while Bokuto sets off to get some groceries from the town. You guys only brought dry stuff and they were mostly snacks, meaning you didn’t have anything fulfilling for dinner. Before he left, he told you to get comfortable in the house and settle in. So you decided to explore, finding an extra bedroom that has two twin beds and two closets instead of just one big one. Then you headed to the patio, noticing how it was shaded to protect from rain and shine, even has a hammock swing. Sitting on it, you lean back as it gently rocks, enjoying the small breeze you get and your eyes find themselves drawn to the stone pathway that seems to lead further into the woods. Deciding it’s nothing to worry about, you close your eyes as the breeze keeps you swaying.

When Bokuto gets home, you’re still asleep. He finds you, looking in each room before checking the patio. He smiles, deciding to move you inside and away from the mosquitoes. When his hand brushes over your thigh, you wake up, jerking away. “Oh, you woke up. I thought you might be a heavy sleeper, so I was gonna take you inside,” he says, giving off another one of his grins. You just look at him, then nod, getting up and moving inside. He watches you go, head tilted. He watches as you enter the bathroom, so he figures you’re fine as he goes to get the food.

The main dish for dinner is meat. Sautéed mushrooms and onions with bread and potatoes, and well done steak. You stay inside to cook the other ingredients while Bokuto cooks the steak on a grill outside. The potatoes are still baking when he comes back in, putting his hand on your back as he sets down the steaks. Instead of just two, there are four steaks. “Four?”

“Well, I’m hungry, so I made two for me,” he mumbles, seemingly shy. “I figured if you were really hungry, you would end up eating a second piece, too,”

Before saying you don’t think you’ll eat two whole steaks, you look at his face and decide against it. Turning back to the mushrooms and onions in the pan, you move them around a bit before telling him, “I might eat both of them. Thank you,”

“You’re welcome,” he gives you a kiss on the top of your head before walking off, not noticing how you stopped moving. He’s gone off to the bathroom, so you just keep on cooking, adding the steaks to the juice and covering them in the mushrooms, hoping the steaks will add flavor. This is the first time you’ve made dinner with your dad, making it seem so domestic and giving you a strange feeling, but it’s nice. He’s so nice and kind, acting as though you’re always around when in reality he’s never really talked to you for more than an hour at a time. His constant happy mood makes it hard for you to complain, as well, not wanting to ruin such a thing.

When dinner is ready, Bokuto serves his own plate and sits down at the table. He’s already set it and had you across from him instead of beside him, thankfully, so you sit down and start to dig in. He continues a conversation, somehow eating all his food at the same time. When you finally get to your second steak, you know you won’t be able to eat it, but Bokuto watches intently to see what you do.

“You know, I’m a bit full. Do you.. do you want half of my steak?” You ask him, seeing his eyes light up. Smiling, you cut it and give him the slightly bigger half, watching him eat it a bit slower than his own steaks, probably due to your slow eating.

The rest of the evening is lackluster, with nothing to do and horrible internet connection. Retiring to bed early, you make sure to shut both doors and lock them, only to find there’s only a lock on the bathroom door from the inside. It’s not like you don’t trust your dad, he’s got no reason to give you that feeling, but it does make you feel uneasy regardless. Bokuto is a nice guy, everyone who you’ve met has said so, even his own teammates only have good things to say for the most part. Even if you feel uneasy, your small nap earlier didn’t energize you and you’re easily falling asleep, finding the silence to be comforting.

When your eyes are blinking away the sleep, you find yourself wishing for the silence to be back. Always a light sleeper, you find the source of the sound. Crickets and cicadas, noisy as ever. With the small wind blowing, it was easy to hear the bugs talking and chirping, annoying you relentlessly. Even when you thought they’d finally quiet down, they’d start up again as you got comfortable. Rolling around and covering your ears, focusing on your heartbeat in your ears, you manage to relax yourself enough to get tired again.

When you hear a creak in the floorboards, you jolt out of bed and look around, seeing nothing. Using your phone, sure enough, nobody was in the room except you. Even as you check the bedroom door, you notice the lights in the kitchen and living room still on, meaning the room would be illuminated before Bokuto could enter your room. Sighing and telling yourself to calm down, you try to relax yourself again, telling yourself it’s just an old house. However, when the wind howls a bit stronger and you hear scratching against your window you decide you’ve had enough.

Bokuto is lounging on the couch, clad in nothing but some grey sweatpants, when you exit your room. It’s colder at night, so you hold yourself as you enter the living room, clearing your throat. He perks up, turning to you. “Hey, hey, what’s going on? Nightmare?” He asks, moving up from his position. He’s still sitting, but he’s alert now. The kitchen light is on, so you’re illuminated enough for him to see you, while you can only see part of him that’s illuminated by the television and the moon outside. Fiddling with your hands you try to think of an excuse, realizing now that ‘scary noises’ is not an adult reason for getting scared.

“It’s just— Yeah, something like a nightmare. I’m not used to being out in the country, after all,” you decide to say, rocking a bit as you tell him so. “The wind is strong and it’s so quiet, so I’m uneasy,”

“Oh, let me guess.. bugs outside your window and the creaky house?” He asks, giving off a gentle smile. You hesitantly nod and he gives off a light laugh, nothing mocking. “I got scared of them my first night, too. It’s alright, come on and hang out with me, I won’t let anything happen to you,” he says, patting his lap as he lays back down.

Normally, people would say and talk about how it’s weird. But this is Bokuto, who shows his affection by touch, and you’re desperately starving for physical affection. Moving to lay on top of him, you quickly do so as to not think too hard when you have to straddle him. He hums in content when you settle down against him, crossing your arms under your cheek as to not completely be against his bare chest. He wasn’t sweaty, thanks to chilly temperature of the house, but he was quite warm. When he wrapped his arms around you, turning his attention back to the TV, you tried to go to back to sleep, listening to his heartbeat and finding yourself relaxing under his touch and warmth. The last thing you felt was him patting your head, his hand keeping its place as you succumbed to sleep once more.

Next time you flutter your eyes open the next time, you can only see a bit in front of you as the night has mostly passed, the sky getting a bit brighter. Lifting your head up, you turn look outside and smile, noticing it’s much more peaceful than last night. Your eyes open wide as you remember the previous night, looking down to see Bokuto’s chest, covered in silver hair. Finding it disgusting now that you’re not tired, you remove yourself from his chest and just straddle him, looking down at his sleeping form. He’s so peaceful when he sleeps, one arm behind his head while his other lays limply at his side after you took it off of you. Smiling down at him, you move down to brush some strands of hair from his face and then jerk your hand away, stunned at what you did. Patting your cheeks, you tell yourself to stop being weird and move to get off, but end up moving a bit too far back, stopping when you bump into something hard.

Your movement immediately stops, immediately realizing what it was, especially when Bokuto moves a bit, a groan in his throat that has your skin prickling. Instead of trying to move off of it, you get curious and move against it again, watching as Bokuto squirms again, hands moving towards you as his one eye opens, trained on you. “You shouldn’t do that, you know. A rude way to wake up your dad, isn’t it?”

When he calls himself that, you feel a gnawing in your stomach that has you agreeing with him, knowing what you’re doing is wrong. Curiosity is something you’ve always had, so you just fall to your own curiosity. Even in moments like these. “You seemed to enjoy it, so I was curious. That’s all,” you simply say, as if it was the most ordinary thing in the world. Now that he’s awake, you take a chance to do it again, but he’s quick enough to realize what you’re doing, pulling you back against his chest as your ass moves away from his boner.

“Didn’t expect you to be a little tease in the morning. A little surprise from sleeping on me, is that it?” He whispers in your ear, making a shiver run through you as your hands are pressed against his chest. Not really noticing it before, you now notice how he’s completely packed with muscles and you can feel them flexing under your touch. So focused on your own thoughts, you’re ripped from them when you feel two fingers pressing against your pussy from the outside of your shorts.

“What— What are you doing?!” You try to squirm away, but he only presses harder as you can feel your pussy pulsing under his fingers. It’s embarrassing, especially since it’s all from pressing up against his hard cock. Moving your head to the side, you look back to see his hand over your ass and notice just how unrestrained his cock is beneath the sweatpants. Gasping from pleasure and shock, you dig your nails into his chest as he rubs a bit harder.

“Bit of payback. You rubbed against me, so I’m rubbing against you. You’re quite literally pulsing under my touch, do you not like it?” He asks, temporarily removing his fingers until you whine. Your face turns hot when you do so, especially when he lets out a big laugh that has your heart fluttering. “Seems like you’re enjoying it, little tease,” he whispers the last bit in your ear, making you get even more hot and bothered.

“It’s just because of curiosity. That’s all,” you tell both him and yourself. Just curiosity. Bokuto hums, removing his slightly wet fingers from your shorts, letting you go. Taking the chance, you remove yourself from his chest and sit back, brushing against his cock again, making you let out a low moan.

“Curious, then? Well then, I’ve never been one to keep others from answers. Go ahead,” he says, smiling as he waves his fingers a bit. Confused, you stare at him. He answers you by bucking his hips, you moaning again. “Sate your curiosity if you want,”

Understanding what he means, you suddenly feel embarrassed. When his hands land on your thighs, rubbing circles with his thumbs and massaging the flesh, you manage to convince yourself to do so. It’s just curiosity and it’s not wrong, you tell yourself, and Bokuto’s your dad, so it’s a safe place to test out curiosity. That’s it, you tell yourself. Even as you place your hands on his abdomen, gently brushing your clothed pussy over his own clothed cock, you tell yourself it’s just a bodily response as you feel your shorts get wetter. Even when he grins up at you, shooting teasing words, you tell yourself it’s fine.

“You’re dripping all over me, no need to be shy,” he encourages, tapping your thigh as he spreads your legs a bit wider. The couch is big enough to do so, your body lowering until you’re completely on his hard cock. Closing your eyes, you rub against him and focus on the pleasure. Ignoring the build up of wetness you’re rubbing against his sweats, you let out a few moans as you rub against a sweet spot, trying to have him rub against that spot again. “A bit more than simple curiosity, isn’t it?”

His voice snaps you from your dream world, eyes looking down to see him smirking at you. He’s smiled and grinned plenty of times, but never smirked towards you with lidded eyes. It goes straight down to your core, making your body flushed as he trails his hands up to your shorts. “Do you like these shorts?” When you look at him in curiosity, then just shrug, you’re gasping as the material is almost instantly shred. Shorts and panties in pieces, dropped to the side and easily forgotten as your pussy in now bare and on display for him. You can’t even say anything before he’s pulling his sweats down, showing off more of his happy trail until his cock is springing out the fabric, standing up straight against your inner thigh.

A feeling of dread pools in your gut once you see it, noticing how wide and long it is, knowing the college boys you’ve been with could hardly compare to the sheer size. You’d be split in two, you think, but slides you on top of his cock, bending his legs as he helps you slide against it. The feeling is more intense and better than before, feeling his cock rub against the inside of your folds as he keeps the tip of his cock rubbing against your clit, adding to your pleasure. Your body weight keeps his cock pushed down, but when you go to adjust to a better position, it moves up and you almost sit on it, but Bokuto makes sure to move it in time.

“Having a hard time?”

“Just— Just a bit,” you say, laughing nervously as you continue to rub. It feels so good, you don’t want to stop. But when he grabs your thighs and adjusts his position, you think it’s over. It isn’t, he just moves you to lay down while he’s hovering over you. “Wait, not—!”

“Hey, it’s alright. I’m not entering you,” he shushes, guiding his cock to rub against your folds once more. Giving your legs a break, it feels much better when he’s doing the work. So engrossed in pleasure, you just run your fingers through his hair as he pushes up your shirt, a pleasant hum from him when he notices the lack of a bra. Continuing to rub against you, his tip rubbing against your clit, you moan when his lips wrap around one of your nipples, fingers playing with the other one. Pushing him closer to your chest, you throw your head back in bliss as you feel your cunt clenching around nothing, desperate for something even as his cock rubs so close to your entrance. With his other hand against your back, you move a hand down to press his cock even more into your pussy, making him groan as you press on it.

“Please don’t stop,” you whisper, breathless as you feel an orgasm coming. Even though you say that, he pulls away, giving a flick to your nipple with his tongue. “Daddy, wh—”

Even though you stopped yourself after hearing the word leave your lips, you can’t help but simmer in embarrassment as he looks down at you, unmoving. He beats you to saying anything though, leaving no room for apologies. “You should watch yourself, little girl. Don’t want to go too far or I may not be able to stop. Especially if you’re gonna be whining for me like that,” he grins, a devilish grin that has your cunt clenching once more. His smile then drops though, becoming more serious. “I’m serious. You know it’s wrong, isn’t it?”

“But it’s just you and me, isn’t it? That’s what you told me when you told me about the vacation,” you say, arms wrapping around his neck and pulling him down. His nose is touching yours, but he keeps his distance from your lips. “It’ll be our little secret, won’t it? After all, I’m still your little girl, aren’t I?” You continue, eyes lidded as you say so.

“That’s right, baby girl, you and me,” he agrees, then pushes his lips against yours. Moaning into the kiss, you arch your back as you try to press his cock against you once more. Instead, he leans back, moving your body with his as he gets up from the couch. His lips never leave yours, small growls as his hands dig into the flesh of your ass and your legs tighten around his waist, never wanting to let go.

Soon enough, you feel a bed mattress under you, breaking the kiss to see you’re in one of the bedrooms. A quick glance shows you it’s his, seeing the clean room as if he hadn’t been in it, which he hadn’t. He’s crawling on top of you, lips trailing from your stomach and up to your chest once more, lips and teeth attacking your nipples as your fingers find purchase in his hair once more, scraping against his scalp as you squirm. The feeling of an orgasm has subsided, but you’re still desperate for release. “Daddy, please,”

“Please what, baby? Gotta use your words,” he hums, sucking on your tit as you moan, back arching.

“I want you to make me feel good, please,” you whine, looking at him through blurry eyes. “I want your cock,”

“Oh no, not quite yet,” he chuckles, giving your breast one more kiss before he trails down your body once more. He presses a few kisses to your inner thigh, leading a trail of them until he’s pressing a kiss to your slicked up folds. “Gotta make sure you’re nice and wet for daddy, after all. You’re dripping but I think you deserve a bit of a treat. I’ll get my own sweet treat, too, of course,” he hums between kisses to your pussy and small licks.

You didn’t think you’d feel anything better than his cock rubbing against your clit, but his tongue flicking against it does the job. Even his lips, pursed together as they suck on the little bud, feel wonderful. Your fingers let go out his hair, worried you’ll pull strands out, your hands moving up to cup your breasts. He can still look at you and he moans in pleasure after he notices you touching yourself. Pushing your thighs tighter around his head, he completely dives in to eat you out as you scream from the pleasure, your fingers tweaking and pulling at your nipples. Sucking on two fingers, you use them to play with one of your nipples, gritting your teeth as drool drips from your mouth and Bokuto slurps up all the juices from your pussy. He’s just as desperate as you are, squeezing your thighs as he makes sloppy noises, eyes glancing up to see how you’re reacting to each lick and suck he gives you. When your hands leave your breasts, one hand bunching up your shirt and the other scratching at the comforter, he gives you one last hard suck as you cream all over his face.

“Ah, da-daddy, I’m sorry, I didn’t—” you stop, realizing he didn’t really set up rules.

“Didn’t what, sweetheart?” He asks, swiping off any slick with his fingers before slurping it up. He lets none go to waste, making a show of popping his finger out of his mouth. “I didn’t say you couldn’t cum, did I?”

“You didn’t, no, but— but I, um,” you stutter, eyes glancing away. He seems to get the hint, from the way you try to rub your legs together and how you fiddle with your shirt, pulling the sleeves to cover your hands.

“Oh, some dumb little college boy told you that you couldn’t cum? Is that it?” He whispers, pressing his lips against your ear. Your skin is hot and flushed, telling him the answer. “And you called him daddy, too, didn’t you? Tch,” he clicks his tongue, seemingly upset. “Don’t worry, I’ll show you what a real daddy is like. You won’t need no college boys fucking my little cunt, isn’t that right? It’s all mine now, isn’t it?” You don’t answer him, too busy whining as he rubs his thumb against your clit and sending pleasure shockwaves through your body. So sensitive from you first orgasm, you can’t even talk to him. How cute.

He doesn’t wait for you to give him an answer, simply lining his cock up with your entrance. Even if you wanted to back out now, he wouldn’t let you. With the taste of you on his tongue and the way you so easily call him daddy, he knew he couldn’t go back to how you two were a day or two ago. The thought of you laying back and letting some nobody stick their dick inside of you makes his blood boil, revving jealousy as he knows you’ve been tainted before. The thought alone has him pushing all the way in, covering your mouth as you let out a scream from pain. He doesn’t really give you time to adjust, starting up a brutal pace that has your ass jiggling with the force and your screams turn into moans, which he lets go unmuffled. He doesn’t want you in pain, but he loves hearing your sweet noises, especially when they’re all for him.

“Daddy, you’re— so big,” you gasp out between thrusts, bringing his head close to you once more. Your arms find themselves around his neck more often than not, finding it easier to bring him closer to your body. He doesn’t mind, but he does let out a pleased grumble when you say such words, speeding up his thrusts as you continue to mewl and whine under him. “God, you’re— completely splitting me!”

“Stupid little boyfriends can’t compare, can they?” He huffs out, sucking a patch of skin on your throat. High enough that you can’t cover it, even if he’ll have to replace it before the week’s over. A bit more nibbling on your skin, along your jaw as you let him, tilting your head back to give him room. “You’re so tight, even after I got you so wet, guess they were just too small to fuck you real good-!” He groans, moving his head up so he can press his lips against yours. You’re drooling an awful lot, mouth continuously open as you can’t control your noises well, especially with how full Bokuto makes you feel. Each harsh thrust has him pushing against your cervix and making stars bud in your vision, but you don’t dare make him stop. It feels so good, you can’t even think how you got pleasure from anyone else.

“Daddy, I’m—!” You scream, nails digging into his skin as your cunt clamps down around him. He doesn’t stop, continuing to fuck into you as he chases his own release.

“Fuck, bet you ain’t ever done that before,” he chuckles, looking down as clear fluid gushes from you, splashing against his cock and abdomen, also covering you. The strands from your cunt connect his hips to yours, even as he pulls away, and him pushing back in makes such a sloppy sound he gets lost in it, coming up on his own release quicker than expected.

“Wai—Wait! Not inside, plea—!” You try to tell him, but he’s cursing once more as he buries himself balls deep, filling you up with his cum. It’s so hot and filling, you can’t help but clench around his cock as he goes to pull out. He let out such a heavy load, it just comes oozing out of your cunt, pooling against the bedsheets.

“Shit, hang on, I’ll get something to clean you up with,” he curses to himself as he removes himself from you, his post-orgasm bliss much shorter than yours. Even as he leaves you, running to the bathroom to get a warm washcloth, you notice he’s still quite hard. Trailing a hand down between your legs, you push some of his cum back into you, spreading it over your folds as you do and rubbing your clit. You’re still overly sensitive, especially after squirting so suddenly, but you can’t help but want more. Scooping some cum up, you lick it off your fingers and moan, finding the taste isn’t that bad.

Bokuto leaves the bathroom after getting you a warm washcloth and a change of clothes, but stops in his tracks as he watches you still scooping his cum back into your oozing pussy. Absolutely flushed and unsatisfied, you look up at him, with one hand rubbing your clit in his cum and the other playing with your nipple. “I want more, daddy. Don’t I deserve a treat?”

Smirking, he sets down the clothes and places the washcloth on the bedside table, crawling back on top of you. You’re just as eager as him, pulling him back towards you as he pushes his cum back inside of you, stuffing you full with his cock once more. It’s not the last time he’ll do so, and it’s not the last time he’ll spend his morning giving you a creamy treat for breakfast, but he fucks you like it’ll be his last.

#BB.Kinky #BB.Dark #haikyuu smut #Mr. Kōtarō #Bokuto smut #tw.incest #tw.dubcon #tw.possessiveness #tw.overstimulation #tw.daddy kink #tw.ddlg #Birdie’s Bokuto Week 2021 #Bokuto Week

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randomshyperson · 3 years

Note

For every request I send, my love, tell me what you want from me in return and I’ll do it 😩😩

But can I request a Nat x Reader where Nat is surprise visiting her family in St. Petersburg only to find her girlfriend already there because they love her more than Nat. I can see Melina being like “she knows how to take care of the pigs”

Hello! Well, I would say i want hugs and kisses but we have an ocean between us haha Hope you like this my friend, it's short but it's sweet.

Gif is not mine, blessed are the gif makers.

Warnings: None.

Words: 1.539 K

Dictionary> Медовый (darling/dear) | мой милый воин (my dear warrior)

All Works Masterlist

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Sweet Petersburg - Oneshot

Natasha parked her car just outside her mother's house, the smell of recent rain in the air as she stepped out of the vehicle, a nostalgic smile on her lips to be back home after a while.

She's visiting for the weekend, St. Petersburg is cold in the autumn, but also really beautiful, and even if she didn't say it out loud, she misses her family everyday.

Nat walked towards the house, she hadn't spotted any family members, but judging by the noise of laughing and talking inside the kitchen, some of them were inside.

She left her bag on the sofa, moving to greet them when the sound of a voice made her frown. Sounded like you.

"Mom?" Nat called out loud and the laughter stopped. The next second two women were coming from the small kitchen to join Natasha in the living room, who was standing with her arms crossed.

"Tasha, darling, you're here!" Melina greeted excited as she moves to hug her daughter. But Natasha's eyes are on you, smiling shyly at her with your hands in your pockets.

"I am." She says. "I'm sorry, am I missing something? Why are you here, babe?"

She asks curiously directly at you. Before you can answer, Melina is touching your shoulder and smiling at her daughter.

"I invited her, of course." She clarifies. "She's great with the pigs, and she's such a lovely companion, Tasha."

Nat let's a short laugh.

"I know, mom. That's why I'm dating her." She says almost dry, and you roll her eyes at her jealousy. Nat is looking at you again next. "I thought you were in Turkey."

"I was." You say as you step forward, resting your hands on Natasha's hips. "I runned into Yelena there. Then she video chatted with your mom and they insisted for me to come for the weekend."

“And you didn't think about asking me to join you? At my family house?" Nat asked with incredulity, but you just smiled at how cute she looked when angry.

"Natasha, don't be like that, it's not like you two need to be together all the time." Melina intruders with a humorous gaze. "Besides, she's been here many times before."

"Wow, what? Natasha exclaim surprised, moving away from your arms as you give her a mixture of a guilty and playful look. "Are you two for real?"

Melina signs impatiently, turning away from this conversation as she walks to the kitchen, Natasha following her while complaining about not being fair that she was spending more time with you than with her own daughter.

You would have followed if Yelena didn't come into the living room with some groceries.

"Just saw Nat's car outside, didn't know she was coming." She remarks as you quickly move to help her with the bags.

"Yeah, you better keep these comments to yourself, Lena. " You say and rush to explain as the woman frowns at you. "Your sister is not pleased to know I’m used to came here without her."

"What? Why?" She asks while you two move to the kitchen, but you don't answer as you two meet Melina and Natasha again, still arguing.

"I just don't think it is fair that none of you called me to let me know that my girlfriend was around!" Natasha accuses grumpy making Yelena laugh.

"It's not our fault your girlfriend is nicer than you, poser." Yelena teases as she puts the groceries on the balcony next to you. Natasha lets go of an annoyed sign turning to her mom again.

"Mom, do something! She's mocking me!"

You want to laugh at the scene but you just stay behind, not wishing to upset Natasha anymore.

Melina sighs as she massages her temples with her fingers.

"Please,girls, don't fight each other." She asks as she ignores Natasha's protest saying that Yelena started the whole thing and moved to grab the groceries you and Yelena brought. "I'm making dinner, everyone out my kitchen!"

That's how you ended up outside, with a grumpy Natasha and a smiley Yelena, walking around the back of the house to join Alexie, who was fixing Melina's truck in the back.

"Hey dad!" Natasha greeted as you reached him, the man was under the car and lifted the vehicle in the air to smile at his daughter.

"Tasha! Hey, kid, good to see you!" He said and put the vehicle back down to roll out and stand up. "Didn't know you're joining us this weekend."

Natasha grumbles insatisfy which makes Yelena laugh and Alexei frowns in confusion.

As his girls moved to sit in the bench nearby, you whispered to him: "She didn't take well knowing you invited me over without her."

"But what's the problem with that?" He asks loudly, attracting the attention of the girls, you sign but he doesn't mind. "It's a good thing that we are having trips with you, you're part of the family now!"

Natasha wides her eyes.

"Having trips? Excuse me?" She asks angrily as she stands up. "How many times have you hung out with my family without me?"

"Well…" You started uncertainty, playing with your fingers. Yelena smirks.

"We had that trip to California last month." She counted while Alexie murmured in agreement. "Also went to Philly. She stayed here for independence day too, and we had tacos night last week. Besides that, whenever she's around my mission place I invite her for a beer." Yelena told and all Natasha did was stare in shock at her and yourself.

"Oh, don't forget China. We had that thing too." Alexie added and Natasha signed.

"You're all unbelievable." She accused as she rushed to pass through you and into the house again.

You were uncertain about following her inside.

"Well, that didn't go well." Alexei comments with an awkward posture. "I will try talk to her."

As he left, you moved to sit with Yelena.

"Sorry about that, maybe I should have left you to tell her about the trips." She said but you just signed softly.

"It's okay." You say. "It's my fault for keeping it for so long. She would have found out anyway."

Yelena murmurs and you two fall silent for a moment.

"California was really fun wasn't it?" She asks amusedly, making you smile.

"Yeah, it was."

You two exchange giggles before deciding to go back inside and you busy yourself with helping Melina with dinner.

//-//

Alexei came back alone from Nat's room with a slight grimace that made you worried.

So you decide you should talk to her yourself.

As you reach her room, you knock before coming in.

Natasha was sitting in her window, next to her bed while looking outside. In that position, you understood that she saw you laughing and talking to Yelena in the yard and by the recents events, that might not be the best.

"Are you mad at me, Nat?" You couldn't hold your words as you reached her, and she turned her head to you immediately, a confused frown in her face.

"Of course not!"

You sign in relief, taking a step forward. "Are you mad at your family?"

"Yes."

You take a deep breath. "Do you want me to stop seeing them?"

She gives a short laugh, shaking her head in denial as she extends her hand for you to grab. As you do, she pulls you towards her gently.

"Of course I don't want you to stop seeing my family, sweetheart." She says as she circles your waist with her arms. "I just got mad at them for not inviting me."

"I'm sorry, Nat." You say. "I should have said something, but they didn't and I was worried about sounding rude or something. You know how much their approval matters to me."

She smiles tenderly, her fingers caressing you gently.

"Yeah, that's why you're so sweet and polite all the time, and they love you more than me." She declares, making you frown. "It's fine of course, how couldn't they not?"

"Don't say that, Nat." You ask as you raise your hands to her cheeks. "Your family loves you very much. They just hang out with me because you're not around as much as I am."

"You think?" She questions, sounding so vulnerable that you wish you could banish all her insecurities away.

"Of course, Nat." You state. "We only talk about you, babe. All the time. And we all love to do it because we all love you. "

She gives you a shy smile before pulling you to her laps, making you giggle as she kisses your face a few times before moving away.

"Give yourself some credit, babe." Nat says with a lovely gaze. "You're a very pleasant company and I think they love to spend time with you as much as I do."

You smile before kissing her in the mouth, gently and sweet like this moment. Scenes like this are definitely your favorites with Nat. Along with late nights with her hands running through your body.

"I love you, Медовый." She whispered against your lips.

"I love you too, мой милый воин." You say and Nat giggles.

"Since when you speak Russian?"

"Your mom is teaching me."

"Okay, out."

//-//-//

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twinkleimagines · 3 years

Text

*can we still be friends?*

You and Drew dated throughout high school and even college, but after college Drew decided to move to Atlanta, leaving you behind with a broken heart. Years later you find eachother by accident , and Drew wants to spark things back up.

WARNING : smut, language!

- also, this was not proof read so fair warning 😂

“ OH MY GOD!” You screamed as you looked over your recent email you had just received .

“ what?!” Your roommate yelled from her bedroom in panic. You met her in the hallway from your room, a wide grin on your face as you held your phone against your chest.

“ y/n if you don’t tell me what the hell you’re up here screaming for “ she replied before you turned your phone around facing her .

“ no fucking way “ she beamed in excitement as she read the email.

“ I got the part “ you grinned excitedly. You had been auditioning for acting parts since you had graduated college . You had gotten small one - two line scenes that paid decent but you had yet to get a big role. Today though you had gotten an email from your agent that you had gotten the role for a character on a new Netflix show called ‘ outer banks’ . You had gotten the role to be a pogue. You weren’t a main character but you were going to be definitely known on screen .

“ oh my fucking god!” She screamed out , you both jumping with excitement.

“Wait when do you start? Where are they filming?” She asked .

“ Charleston South Carolina ! It says I’m suppose to be there by tomorrow morning “ you beamed.

“ we’ll what the hell are you doing still standing here ?! Go pack! “ she demanded.

****

“Y/n you ready?” You agent asked from the Uber you were both in.

“ I am so ready” you beamed excitedly.

“ okay we’ll were meeting some of the producers and casts for a chemistry reading “ you looked over at her in confusion.

“ but I already did a chemistry reading “ you replied.

“ yes with the ‘ pogues’ “ she replied. “ your character is going to be having most her interactions with two ‘kooks’ and they just want to test the waters to see how well you guys don’t get along”. You shook your head.

“ oh, whatever “ you shrugged. It didn’t take long to get to the location that you would soon be filming at and you had honestly became overly excited.

“ Hi y/n I’m Jonas, we talked briefly over the phone a few times” Jonas said while shaking your hand.

“ yes I remember , hi!” You replied excitedly .

“ okay so I’m going to have you come into this room and then you and a couple of the other actors are just going to go over your lines , nothing to major” he reassured. You nodded in agreement following behind .

You walked in, almost stopping dead in your tracks as you scanned the room. There were three men, one you knew all too well.

“ this is Austin, Deion , and Drew.” Jonas spoke.

You didn’t hear much of what else Jonas was saying as you and Drew made eye contact, him seeming just as surprised as you. The tension between the two of you could be cut with a knife it was so thick, considering the last time you ever spoke to him ended horribly .

~~~

“ Drew” you said walking out from his bedroom at his moms house .

“ yeah princess “ he replied walking out of his mother’s kitchen towards you.

“ what’s this about Atlanta?” You asked holding up his laptop with a search history for apartments in Atlanta Georgia. He sighed nervously running his hands through his hair.

“ princess I was going to tell you” he replied stepping forward. You quickly stepped back scoffing while shaking your head .

“ tell me what drew?” It was pretty obvious what the answer was but you were angry and wanted to hear it from his own mouth. Drew sat for a second, knowing everything was about to fall apart once he told you his plans.

“ I’m moving to Atlanta “ he responded finally, his eyes lowering to to the ground. Even though you subconsciously knew what he was going to say, once he finally did it really hit you hard.

“ drew” you responded in disappointment. “ you know I have one year left in school I can’t move to Atlanta “ you replied. It was true , Drew was a year older than you . You had gotten together your sophomore year in high school while he was a junior and been together ever since. You even went to the same college as him so you guys would be together . You both were passionate on the same career which made it easier, but the fact that when it was his turn to wait on you he wouldn’t.

“ princess I know , I figured we can do a long distance thing” your eyes widened in shock.

“ Drew you’re going to be a whole state away are you serious?!”you replied, your hands thrown in the air .

“Y/n there’s no opportunities for me here , you know I’ve always wanted to go to the big cities to pursue in acting .” He replied his voice now rising as well.

“ yeah but” you responded, your voice lowering as tears began to form in your eyes. “ you’re leaving me behind” . It hurt so bad that Drew was leaving. Of course you wanted him to prosper in life but you had been doing everything and even putting some job opportunities on hold so you wouldn’t be away from him, but the one time it was his turn, you weren’t his choice .

“ y/n-“

“ no just forget it Drew. Enjoy Atlanta” you responded before leaving towards his room to pack your stuff, soon leaving Drew’s home, never speaking to him again.

~~~

“ Rafe and Callie- go ahead with your scene” Jonas asked as he pointed down to the sheet of paper going over a short scene between the two of your characters .

“ listen Callie you and your dirty pogues need to stay off of figure 8 ok” Drew spoke with hatred, looking up at you waiting for your response .

“ you know what” you replied sitting up in your seat. “ you kooks are all the same . “ you spat out . You could feel anger building among yourself , not because of getting into character, but more because of your true anger towards Drew was beginning to flow out.

“ is that so?” He relied.

“ YES Rafe!” You interrupted. “ you only care about yourself. You’re all selfish and self centered. You always get what you want no matter who gets hurt in the way” Drew sat for a second. He could tell from the look on your face that even though those words were written for Rafe, he knew you meant it directly towards him.

“ the only dirty one here is you Rafe “ you spat out, scolding him from a cross the table . You quickly were snapped out of your trance when you heard clapping from the side of you, Jonas laughing with excitement.

“ man that’s exactly what I’m talking about sweet heart!” He said pointing at you. You chuckled before glancing at Drew , seeing him almost look, upset?

—

It didn’t take you long to find your way to your trailer . All of your excitement about the new gig had gone flying out the window the moment you realized one of the cast members was the same person who shattered your heart years ago.

If we’re being honest , Drew was the reason you had made it to where you were now . Not to give him full credit , but after he chose to pursue in his career and not you, you had decided for yourself you would do nothing but make it to the top and make sure that you never chose anyone over yourself again and was all you had been doing at this point.

You sat staring at yourself in your mirror before you heard a gentle knock against your trailer.

Your stomach did somersaults as you knew exactly who it was. You hesitated for a second before you finally got up from your chair, making your way to the door.

You rolled your eyes as you saw the tall brunette standing behind the door of your trailer . You turned away, letting him in as you went to your couch.

“ Well uhm” he spoke nervously , running his hands through his hair. You looked up at him in anger as you waited for him to respond.

“ I wanted to see you.” He responded making his way over to you. “ it’s been a while” he finished now standing directly above you. You scoffed crossing your arms .

“ you can say that” you mumbled.

“ look I know we left on bad terms-“

“ no Drew you left on bad terms. Let’s clear that up “ you interrupted standing up. Drew took a step back giving you space before nodding, looking down.

“ I understand why you’re upset . But I want you to know I wasn’t leaving you. I was just leaving North Carolina. There were bigger opportunities out there for me and I was going to get them started staying back at home. I just-“ you put your hand in the space between you and him.

“ Drew you left me “ you responded, your voice s bit softer than it was. “ I went to the same school as you so we could be together. I turned down so many opportunities for us. I put my life on hold-“

“ I never asked you to!” Drew responded finally snapping. You sat for a second, shocked at his words . “ and if we’re being honest I would’ve never ask you to” you shook your head in disbelief . Your anger was causing you to be blind to the truth Drew was saying. He was absolutely right but you had never sat back and thought about it.

“ you know what Drew” you spat out, tears beginning to form once again. “ it’s a good thing you’re playing the kook king- yanno since he’s so damn selfish”.

Drew was taken back from your words. You didn’t mean it at all but you were so built up with anger from why a happened years ago that the words just slipped out. Drew nodded his head slowly before making his way out of your trailer without another word said .

You gasped, realizing how harsh you were to him. your hand flew to your mouth as you let out sobs thinking about the words you had just said

You sat silently in your trailer as you thought about the conversation you had just had . You knew Drew was right. He never actually told you to do any of the things you had done, you had just done them because you believed the relationship was more important than your goals in life. And now you realize it was really you who had left Drew. You could’ve worked through long distance, and followed him to Atlanta later but instead you left your selfishness and anger get the best of you.

You realized it was really you who needed to apologize so you quickly gathered your composer before making your way outside, searching for Drew’s trailer. Once you had found it you began frantically knocking , only for no one to answer.

“ y/n?” You heard from behind you. You turned around for it to be Drew. You wanted to do nothing but run and wrap your arms around him but instead you stood still, looking at him with puffy eyes.

“I-I’m sorry “ you blurted out. Drew’s eyes widened before he grabbed your arm .

“C’mon let’s take this somewhere more private” he spoke , guiding you into his trailer before shutting g the door behind you.

“ Drew you were right . I was just so mad I couldn’t even see that it was really me being selfish. And for that I am so sorry. “ Drew sat quietly , listening to go on and on about how sorry you were even though he had forgave you before he had even dry your own trailer.

“ y/n” he responded interrupting you during your rant . “ y/n just hush for a second” he responded with a slight chuckle . You nodded, wiping your face.

“ y/n I was wrong for not communicating with you. I should’ve chased you and brought you with, and if long distance wouldn’t have worked - I should’ve stayed behind and waited until you finished school” he responded grabbing a hold of your hand. You should your head in disagreement.

“ no, because you wouldn’t be here” you responded .

“ well regardless- I have missed you so damn much” he relied before pulling you towards him, placing his lips against yours. It was weird but such a familiar feeling that you hadn’t even realized how much you had missed it as well.

After both pulled away from the kiss, Drew looked down at you, grinning.

“ what “ you scoffed with a smirk following .

“ I can’t believe we’re about to play enemies on this show “ he spoke out causing you both to laugh loudly.

*****

It had been over a month since you and Drew reconnected. Things had definitely began to look up for the both of you. You had made many friends amongst the cast and even though you and Drew weren’t dating, feelings were definitely sparking between the two.

“ what are you up to tonight?” Drew asked as you both sat in the field , watching the cast film a scene.

“ I was honestly going to just stay in my apartment and watch tv tonight. You?” You responded, leaned back against the grass propped up on your hands.

“ oh” he replied, looking back out into the field.

“ I am making mom‘s chicken casserole so I was going to see if maybe they wanted to come over and have some?” He asked. You grinned. His mother’s chicken casserole was one of your favorite dinners she had ever made and Drew knew that. You nodded with a grin plastered across your face causing Drew too smile as well. You could almost say his cheeks were turning red.

***

You sighed heavily as you looked over your outfit in your mirror in your bathroom. You wanted to look cute, but casual so you dressed in jeans and a loose pink tank, a few pieces of jewelry and tennis shoes.

It was obvious that you were beyond nervous to see him because despite being around Drew, this was the first time you both were going to spend one on one quality time together without somebody else including themselves in. just being able to be around him though and spending time with him even if it included others, you had regrown the feelings you once had for Drew over time, but you weren’t sure at this point if the feelings were mutual. Drew had changed and matured so much over the few years you had been away , and of course you had too so things were the same , but very different.

“ hey” Drew said with a smile as he opened the door, seeing you stand on the other side.

“ hey” you grinned slyly before walking in.

“ mmmm” you moaned out, smelling the food in the oven. “ boy does that bring back memories .” Drew chuckled before scratching the back of his head nervously .

“ yeah I was thinking the same” he replied before making his way into the kitchen, opening the oven to check on it.

You looked around his apartment. It was crazy to see that his style in furniture and agriculture was still the same as it was when he was younger.

It almost made you sad that you had missed out on Drew’s growth since college. You quickly shook the sadness feeling away before making your way next to him , watching contently as he took the pan out of the oven.

“ oooohh yum” you beamed excitedly placing your hands together in front of you.

“ want to grab the plates?” He asked as he grabbed a spatula to help break the chicken up. You nodded before making your way to his cabinet, grabbing two plates out. It was quiet as you both fixed your plates, making your way to his couch. Since the producers only provided studio sized apartments for the time you were there , there wasn’t much space for tables so it was either the couch or standing.

“ Drew, I know I haven’t said this yet, but I am so proud of you” you finally spoke, breaking the silence. He looked over at you , a grin forming against his face as he chewed through his bite.

“ I’m serious “ you responded , not taking your eyes off of Drew. “ imagine if I really held you back like I tried . You wouldn’t be where you’re at now.“ you said. It was almost like you were saying it to yourself . You were finally realizing that it was you in the wrong in the long run. To even ask Drew to stay behind and not follow his dreams was just selfish .

“Y/n stop beating yourself over this okay? We’ve both made decisions in the past that we regret but look at us now” he responded. He didn’t need to go into detail but he was right . It became silent once again, just the sound of his tv going in the background ( that neither of you were actually paying attention to) .

“ this honestly tastes just like your moms” you laughed out in shock.

“ yanno why do you sound so surprised?” He jokingly argued, his head cocked towards you.

“ because Drew” you laughed out thinking of the memory you were about to speak of. “ you couldn’t even cook your hot pocket in the microwave without burning it” you both laughed as you thought about Drew’s multiple attempts to cooking that never worked out. When the laughing between you two died down, Drew stared intently into your eyes before he leaned in, placing his lips against yours. Your body immediately pushed forward towards his, pressing into the kiss.

Your eyes widened once you realized what was happening before pulling away, placing your hands over your mouth.

“ Drew” you spoke out softly. You were so unsure on whether this was really what he wanted that you didn’t want him to do something he’d regret.

“ y/n it’s okay” he reassured gently, before placing his hands against the side of your face, placing his lips against yours once again. This time you caved in, your hands finding their way to the back of his head, your fingers intwining through his hair.

You moaned slightly as his hands pressed firmly against your hips, pulling you up onto his lap. You began moving your hips against his, pressing your crotch against his for friction. Drew’s long fingers pressed against your bottom as he pushed you forward against him, deep throaty groans following behind.

“ lay down on the couch “ he demanded , his voice low and deep. You and Drew had slept together of course when you were younger , but something seemed different this time, more dominant was more like it. You bit your bottom lips as you removed yourself from Drew, quickly pushing your jeans down and off of you before laying down across the couch as Drew had instructed, your head landed on the arm rest.

Drew hovered over you, placing sloppy kisses down your neck, trailing down to your breast. You watched intensely as he pulled your breast out from above your shirt , groping them in his large hands. You hissed slightly as he pinched around your exposed nipple before placing your right nipple in his mouth.

You closed your eyes in pure bliss, your bottom lip pressed in between your teeth.

Your eyes reopened when you felt his fingers tuck under your underwear, before tugging them down , tossing them next to where your pants laid. Your eyes furrowed together . In all the years you had been together, Drew had never given you head . He was just too insecure that he wouldn’t do it good so seeing him down there , his lips trailing up your thigh to your heated core was beyond shocking.

You gasped loudly as he finally placed his mouth where you wanted him, his tongue doing one long stroke against your slit before lightly sucking on your clit.

“ Drew” you moaned out . You were tempted to ask where he learned this from but you knew that wouldn’t be an appropriate question nor would you really want to hear the answer.

At this point Drew was doing wonders on your heated area, so much that you couldn’t even hold the moans in. The way his tongue and finger both simultaneously worked against you had you coming to your orgasm quicker than anything.

“ fuck Drew!” you moaned out as you bucked your hips up against his face as you felt that familiar tingle feeling. Before you could even finish your climax, Drew’s lips clashed against yours, your own taste filling your mouth as his tongue fought for dominance over yours. Drew reached in between the two of you , , pulling his rock hard member out before before quickly sliding into your already soaking wet core.

Your arms looped under his as your hands landed on his back, your nails immediately began to dig as his hips moved at a fast pace against yours . Your body rocked against his couch as he pounded in you over and over, his member filling you more than you had ever remembered. He placed his lips against yours again as you let uncontrollable moans.

Drew placed one hand against the arm of the couch, his bicep flexing over your head as he continued to grind himself into you at continuous beat.

“ god I’m getting close” he groaned out , his words barely audible as he became out of breath from moving so fast .

You quickly wrapped your legs around him, causing him to go in even deeper than before . He threw his head back in pleasure , the veins in his neck popping out as his thrusts became sloppy. You pressed your lips deep against his as you felt yourself cum around him as well as his movements began to slow down, eventually becoming to a haunt.

Drew sat for a second, his forehead placed against yours as he caught his breath before he sat back up off of you, helping you sit up.

It was quiet as you both cleaned yourself before you sat back down on the couch next to him, still slightly worn out.

“ damn Drew “ you laughed out, running your now tangled hair towards the back of your head . “ you fucked the shit out of me “ you stated, causing him to chuckle.

“ like I said , I really missed you over those years” he said with a cocky smirk following . You shook your head while grinning, turning your eyes away from him.

“ do you maybe want to stay the night?” He asked , this time with seriousness. You looked over at him, a smile present on your face .

“ yeah I’d like that” you responded.

Maybe what they say is true.

If it’s meant to be, it’ll find its way back. ❤️

*****

I almost deleted this whole thing because Idk just didn’t really like it but I know I’ve been incognito for almost a week so I figured I’d post it anyways. Another fic called ‘Keep your hands to yourself ‘will be posted tonight though so anyone want to be tagged let me know ❤️

@maybanks-smile @tremendousalpacawitch @multifanofkpopgroups @lilyrosemelodydeppp

@Littlementalpolariods

@mrs-cameron

@bigdrewenergy @imjustanothernerd

#drew starkey #obx #smut #drew starkey fanfiction #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron imagine #drew starkey imagine #obx fiction #drew starkey dirty imagine #drew starkey smut #obx smut #obx dirty imagine

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five-rivers · 4 years

Note

Danny slowly loses his memories from before the Accident.

“I don’t remember that,” said Danny. “Are you sure I was there?”

Maddie raised her eyebrows. “I talked to you about it just last week,” she said. “When I was asking you about what you’d like to do during summer vacation.”

“I remember that,” said Danny, uncurling slightly from his position on the couch. “I just don’t remember the other thing. I... maybe we talked about something like it. When was it?”

“You were twelve,” said Maddie. “It was just before your birthday.”

Slowly, he shook his head. “Sorry,” he said. “I remember, um... What other vacations did we have? Before the one where you thought I was crazy, it was, um...” He held his hands as if preparing to count on them. “We went to New York that one time. And then the Great Lakes before that... Oh! And that haunted house road trip.”

He frowned down at his hands, and Maddie felt something unpleasant curl in her gut.

“Is that... All you remember?” she asked.

“Y-Yeah? I guess the others were from when I was too young to remember?”

“The haunted house trip was when you were five,” said Maddie. “Danny... have you been,” she didn’t want to say it, didn’t want to piece together other little oddities into a big picture, “have you been forgetting things?”

“No!” said Danny, defensively, sitting up straighter. “I’m just...” He chewed his lip. “It isn’t as if I’ve forgotten anything recent.”

His abysmal grades and missed curfews begged to differ.

“One second,” said Maddie. “Stay here.”

She went to her room and fetched one of her largest photo albums. Danny was still on the couch when she came back, picking at the hem of his pant leg, and staring blankly at the floor. Maddie sat next to him, making him jump. She opened the album to a random page.

“What were we doing here?” she asked.

“Um,” said Danny, brows pinching together in confusion. “Shopping?”

“For?” prompted Maddie.

Danny shook his head. “It’s just shopping. It isn’t important.”

“Danny, this is from when we got you that model spaceship. The one you have hanging up in your room.”

Danny blinked, and slowly shook his head.

The doctor’s office looked clean. It even smelled clean. Danny was still doing his level best not to touch anything. Maddie would have sighed at his behavior, but she was too tense. She met Jack’s eye. He looked terrible too.

“There are no signs of Alzheimer’s disease,” said the doctor. All three of them sighed with relief. “However... You said the other symptoms, the difficulty in school, began after the electrical accident?”

“Yeah,” said Danny.

The doctor nodded. “Electricity can do strange things to the brain, sometimes. We haven’t been able to find any structural damage, but the activity levels...” He brought a colored image up on his computer screen. “This is where long-term memory is stored,” he said.

“Doesn’t red usually indicate high levels of activity?” asked Jack.

“It does,” said the doctor. “This is actually higher than usual activity... Honestly, I don’t know what’s going on here. I would like to request that you make a record of things that you currently remember as happening in your life, and then come back a month from now.”

“That’s it?” demanded Maddie.

“Right now, since we don’t know what’s causing this,” said the doctor, “the best we can do is monitor the situation. We don’t even know if this is an ongoing deterioration, or something more gradual. On the upside, other than long-term memory, there doesn’t appear to be any damage. Your timeline after your accident is clear and detailed. The cognitive tests we put you through actually put you significantly above average... This is what we can do.”

Maddie didn’t like it. Danny didn’t look surprised. Or even particularly upset.

She caught Jack’s eye again. They would have to be ready to support him, when the extent of what he had lost fully hit him.

Danny floated down the icy hallway next to Frostbite. “This isn’t going to be one of those examinations where I have to get undressed, is it?” he asked.

Frostbite chuckled, but there was an undercurrent to it that usually wasn’t present. “Only halfway.” He paused to tap Danny on the chest. “Your mind is no longer entirely contained in your head, after all.”

Danny rubbed at where Frostbite had tapped him. “You don’t think that has anything to do with it, do you?”

“I’m unsure,” said Frostbite as they reached the examination room. “It isn’t unusual for ghosts to lose their memories of their lives, but that is both more immediate and more complete. Sit down here, and take your shirt off, Great One, and we can begin.”

Danny made a face at the item that looked like an overly complicated dentist’s chair with a large metal disk embedded in the back, but obeyed.

“Here we are,” said Frostbite, pulling a complicated ring-shaped thing from the chair. “This part goes around your head,” he said adjusting it to fit.

Despite his cold core, Danny shivered at the frigidity of the metal.

“These are to monitor your core, along with the matching one built into the chair,” said Frostbite as he attached several flat disks to Danny’s chest.

“Are they, like, ultrasound?” asked Danny, running his finger along the edge of one of them. He didn’t like how they stuck to his skin.

“They work on a similar principle,” said Frostbite. He turned on several nearby monitors. “With this, we will be able to see how your brain and core react in tandem. Can you transform for me a few times? I want to compare with the baseline readings we took from you when you first stayed with us.”

“Sure,” said Danny.

“Alright,” said Frostbite. “Now, I am going to try sending a few low-intensity ectoplasmic pulses and currents through you. Is that alright?”

“Sure,” said Danny.

The first few left Danny feeling lethargic and tingly. Other gave him so much energy he had to leave the room for a few minutes to burn some of it off. Another, interestingly, turned off his ghost half, not unlike the Plasmius Maximus.

There was a rest period in-between each test, to make sure that they weren’t mixing results. During those times, Danny and Frostbite would laugh and tell jokes and...

... Danny trailed off in the middle of a sentence. “Frostbite?” he asked after a minute. “What was I just saying?”

“I want to stress that this is currently just a theory, Great One,” said Frostbite.

“It’s okay,” said Danny. “Just... What is it?”

“Your memories are recorded in both your brain and your core. You know this, correct?”

“Yeah. You told me that a while back.”

Frostbite nodded. “Normally, if one is turned off, the other one is still recording memories, and the memories will be transcribed.”

Danny nodded.

“Or, if they are disconnected, in the case of the Plasmius Maximus, or your parents’ ‘Ghost Catcher,’ they will swap memories. However...”

“Yes?”

“It is my theory that certain kinds of discrepancies between memories can lead to your core deciding that the discrepancy is an error and attempting to remedy it. Great One, your core did not exist prior to your accident.”

“So, it thinks my memories from before that are wrong, and it’s getting rid of them.”

“I’m afraid it may be so.”

“Can you stop it? I mean, you were able to artificially induce it, earlier...”

Frostbite made a face. “The only things I can think of that could stop this would be unhealthy in the long run. I do not believe you want to try to split yourself in two again.”

“No,” agreed Danny. “Any-Anything else?”

Frostbite sighed. “This is not something I can confirm,” he said, “but I suspect that the reason for your odd pattern of your memory loss is that the memories you dwelled on most often vanished first.”

“Oh,” said Danny. “Because that would bring them to my core’s attention...”

Frostbite nodded.

“Well. That’s... not ideal.”

“I’m sorry, Great One. Would that I could do more.”

“It’s all gone,” he said, without preamble, as he stood at Jazz’s door first thing in the morning.

She looked crushed. “Are you sure?”

Danny nodded. “I remember remembering, but I don’t actually remember. It’s weird and... actually kind of a relief,” he said, tilting his head to one side.

Jazz blinked rapidly. “Are you going to tell Mom and Dad?”

He shook his head. As his memories had disappeared, so had most of his remaining trust in his parents. Between the memories of them caring for him, and the memories of them attacking or threatening him, the latter were more vivid.

He still loved them, and his ghostly desires, that he literally could not remember living without, still focused on them, but that and trust were two different things. It had been months since he’d started to fake retaining memories that he only knew about from reading his journals.

“Sam and Tucker?”

This time, Danny nodded, the gesture much more enthusiastic. “We were going to meet up later today, anyway. Do you want to come with us?”

“Sure,” said Jazz. She rubbed at her eyes. “Give me a second.”

Danny nodded. He wasn’t in a hurry. “I’ll be downstairs.”

He could understand the grief. He had felt it. But it was over, now. The only thing left was to make new memories.

#danny phantom #ask #answer #prompt fill #prompt

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bonny-kookoo · 3 years

Text

Sing to me: JJK x Reader 🔞

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Mermaid AU, Siren!Jungkook, Prince!Jungkook, homeless!Reader, Romance, Smut duh

Wordcount: 5k (medium)

Tags/Warnings: okay so, spoiled kook, possessive kook, Theres literally an attempted murder lol, drowning? whoops, blood oh no, reader is hella fucking dense ok, biting, courting lol, fish boy is in love, whoops, anyways we got sexy times too, because in this AU fishboy got legs n all of that hah, unprotected sex because, guys pls this ain't supposed to he realistic, wrap it before you tap it folks, its also not all that filthy lol, blink and you'll miss the scene, honestly I didn't include much smut because yall nasty so you will ask for dirty drabbles anyways, not that I mind lol, k I'm done I think, wow mom I've sinned less than usual..

Summary: Help me love myself, and I might learn to love you as well.

Or alternatively: you save Jungkook from being killed, and he totally gets the wrong signals. But he's cute, so its fine. Probably.

Jungkook is floating.

He thinks about what lies above the waves, and cant think of anything he really finds interesting. The surface is littered in junk, in things humans leave behind without thinking twice about it. It's air is thick and stuffy, hard to breathe and never clear at all. It's crowded, with creatures who at the end of the day all look the same in his eyes. There's nothing exciting about the world people walk on.

Its boring, and dirty.

His own home is, compared to that, a kingdom radiating like the moon itself. It shines and sparkles, and harbors some of the most beautiful creatures ever to be found. He and his family, as well as everyone else, live in peace with nature down underneath the waves, existing side by side instead of trying to gain the upper hand all the time.

And he's reminded of the cruelty of man, when he finds himself caught in a net.

He's somehow made the fishermen drop it instead of pulling him up on their boat. But that doesn't mean he's free- he's still struggling with it, fighting it, but he cant rip it apart. All he does really, is tie the knots tighter, have them dig into his skin until spots are rubbed raw. He can't really swim anywhere at this point, gives up as he can see the last lights of his distant home fade into the distance.

Jungkook is floating.

He's slowly being led by the waves, by the love of wind and waters, as he closes his eyes. Its a pity, really; for a prince held so high to die by the mere hands of the poor, he thinks. It's upsetting him, very much so, but he takes it as it is. There's nothing he can do anyways, as he slowly comes into contact with the sand below. It washes him up onto short, the dry sand sticking to his body, waves pushing him higher and higher onto the ground.

He shivers, the cold outside air biting at his skin now unsheltered and defenseless.

He doesn't know how long he lays there.

But at some point, steps are heard on the sand. He keeps his eyes closed, doesn't care about what will happen next- he really just wants to have it be over by now, the ropes already painfully burning his skin at certain spots. He's sure theres sand in his wounds as something touches him- warm fingers, hesitant, and almost shy.

He keeps his eyes closed.

"My god, I hate humans.." You mutter under your breath, your voice hitting his ears, making him notice the way it sounds. He thinks it sounds very similar to some of his kind; sirens being blessed with voices sweet and enchanting. Maybe you were one of the strays who had decided to live on the surface for some reason? But your smell was entirely human, although much sweeter and pleasant than anyone he'd met before. And then, after a small short moment of pain-

He's free.

His arms flop to his side, and he breathes in deeply- finally able to fully move again. His eyes open, and adjust to the night for a moment, before they meet yours.

How interesting.

"Jungkook?" Jimin asks him, curious to what has gotten the young Siren so occupied. Typically, Jungkook would be watching the annual kingdom dances with at least some form of interest; even if it was just a glimpse of it, just to make his parents worry less about him misbehaving. But today, as the graceful dancers move around to the orchestra playing, the young prince is absolutely not there. At least not mentally. "Jungkook." The older one scolds, getting Jungkooks attention- his gaze hard and annoyed. "Please, young prince- at least try to pretend you're interested. This is after all part of our culture." He strategically uses his title as teasing- something which makes Jungkook snort without any fun.

"I really don't want to be here." He explains, and Jimin sighs. "I'd rather be at the surface.." He mumbles, being careful not to be too loud- but Jimin does pick it up, and so does his partner, Taehyung, next to him- now leaning a bit forward to hear better.

"Oh?" Jimin asks. "What could be of interest there, I wonder?" He teases, and Jungkook grows even more irritated.

"Nothing that should interest a whore like you." He says harshly, though Jimin knows he means no harm with it. Jimin is, after all, a man who enjoys the simple pleasures in life- which is why he can't quite grasp why Jungkook, a young man in his prime like himself, doesn't seem to care about whats going on around him.

"Hm, but I think she must be absolutely divine if you're willing to risk the wrath of your own mother just to see her." He says, and Taehyung snickers next to him, clearly amused.

But to both of their surprise, Jungkook grows.. calm. Theres even a glimpse of a smile on his lip as he rests his head on his head, elbow on the armrest of his throne. "That she is." He says, quietly, as he watches the young woman in front of him. He has to imagine you there instead, moving oh so gracefully to the sounds of his Kingdom's greatest musicians- dressed in the most beautiful gown he'd gift you. "That she is.." He repeats, a dreaming look on his face that Jimin has not seen before.

Jungkook watches you.

He enjoys watching you on your daily trips to the beach, picking up cans and bottles, and other things people throw away without care. You're cleaning up the beach, and he thinks its a very good behavior- he likes the way you always carefully scan the ground and sides for any garbage. He swims a little closer as he spots you squatting down; eyes lighting up as you pick up a shell he'd personally not care much for. It's slightly pink- but nothing he hasn't seen in his life. They're so common, and he suddenly thinks that if this already makes you happy, what if he was to bring you something else? Something better, something more worth your attention?

He feels a rush of excitement.

Dashing into the opposite direction, he makes his way towards the ground below, eyes scanning the ground as he searches for something. He spots it after a few minutes of searching, but when he holds the pearl, he hesitates.

Its not enough.

No, that's not what you should get. He's only paying back his dept, yeah, that's what he's doing. But what if he was overdoing it by bringing you something too expensive or rare? No, he should be smart about it, yeah. Start small, and work your way up he thinks, as he takes the pearls he's collected while deep in thought, and pushes himself back to the top, swimming easily. He hopes you're still there-

And there you are, dipping your feet into the water.

He looks at what he can see; only able to see clearly underneath the waves rather than above. There's a bracelet hanging around your ankle, and it looks cheap, he thinks. It only helps him by giving him ideas for his next gifts- if you would accept his first, that is. He's never been rejected before, but then again, has always rejected instead. Nothing had interested him to the extend you did. Maybe you really were of his kind, secretly.

When he slowly brings his head up the waves, you don't get scared, or flinch. You simply look, spot him, and smile.

He likes that expression.

He comes closer, free hand helping him onto the stone you sit on, his hand holding your gift eagerly pushing against yours. You understand quickly, and open them, and he smiles. You're smart, he notes, and it only adds to your qualities, he thinks. Dropping the pearls, your eyes sparkle again- as they should, he thinks with pride. You inspect them with big eyes, as if you've never seen something alike. He enjoys your reaction- and you nod at him. "Thank you- are they for me to keep?" You ask, pointing to them, and then at your chest. He's not fully fluent in human language, but has picked up on some words and phrases, since Seokjin had recently strayed- teaching him some stuff whenever he got bored and visited his younger brother.

So Jungkook nods. "You." He says, and you like the sound of his voice; fittingly just as handsome as the rest of him, you think. But then again- his kind is known for its beauty and enchanting voices. "Keep." He tells you, pushing your closed palm a bit closer to your body as if to underline his statement. You think its cute, in a way.

"Okay." You say. "I'll keep them-?" You ask, and he doesn't understand, until you point to yourself, and say a name- yours, he supposes.

"Ah-" He starts, pointing to himself. "Jungkook. Jeon, Jungkook." He tells you, and you nod, smiling.

"It's nice to meet you, Jeon Jungkook." You smile, and he grins back, slightly sharpened canines in stark contrast with his bunny-like smile.

He thinks its nice to meet you too.

"But you're a witch, aren't you?" Jungkook argues, staring at Taehyung. "I thought you were all so capable." He challenges, and Taehyungs eyes darken- quite literally, since sea witches do technically have black eyes- but conceal them, as to not scare off people. He regains his composure however when Jimins hand lays on his shoulder.

"Now now, no need to become huffy." He says. "He didn't say he can't do it- he simply told you that its not that easy." He explains, and Jungkook sighs, rolling his eyes. Ever the spoiled prince, they think to themselves.

"I don't care about that." He states. "Can you do it, or can you not?" He asks, and Taehyung thinks for a moment.

"I.." He begins, before he sighs. "I can. But, there's a catch, Jungkook." He tells him, and this time, the youngest of the group seems just as serious as he listens. "I can't promise that.. the result will be what you will expect." He says.

"What do you mean?" Jungkook asks.

"There's a chance she won't survive it."

He doesn't think much about why you're so often sitting on that rocky structure close to the deep- he likes not having to get out of the water to be close to you. And you think, Jungkook is quite the interesting being.

He’s curious; that much you can tell. His hands rest on your knees, your toes sometimes brushing against his abdomen as he swims closer- face coming forward to properly look at you. His vision must be bad outside of the waters you assume, his brown eyes squinting in concentration until he huffs and let’s himself back into the waters. You chuckle, and simply take off your jacket, slipping into the water as well as you control your breath- his entire face brightening at your body now underwater in his world, finally clear to see for his eyes.

You’re pretty, he thinks, definitely prettier than any other human he’d encountered before. The clothes covering your breasts and private parts a bit dull and boring for his taste- but he’d change that soon. He smiles, happy, before holding up his finger as if to signal for you to wait before he swims away, elegantly and fast. You swim up to breath some air, catch your breath, until there’s a hand around your calf, holding, fingers running over the skin, signaling you to come down again. You follow his question, taking a deep breath to meet him underneath the surface; his excited hands wrapping something around your neck, before he swims in circles as if he’s suddenly got too much energy. You point to yourself, as if to ask if you can keep it- and he nods, wide eyes watching you with a smile that you can’t help but mirror.

You don't quite realize what he's doing.

He however thinks you know. You know that he's courting you, and you're interested in him. You know that he's just given you more than a simple gift. He only believes you're letting him work for it- something he happily does, taking on the challenge as always. He swims closer, holds your shoulders, as his eyes look into yours, his gaze happy and child-like almost. He's close to finally showing you affection- but you suddenly swim to the surface instead.

And even though he knows you only wanted to breathe, he can't help but feel slightly sour at the ruined moment.

"You're awfully happy these days." His mother says, watching her son in the gardens of the palace. "May I ask what has gotten you in such a bright mood?" She asks, and Jungkook doesn't quite know how to break it to her. He knows its not forbidden, knows it has, and does, happen each and every day it seems- but there's still fear inside of him. Theres still hesitation, even though he is not ashamed of what has happened- of what he has done. His mother however notices. "You know you can trust me, right?" She says, and he nods.

Its now or never.

"I've found a mate." He says, and his mother smiles warmly, holding his cheek as she kisses it in congratulation. "Its a human." He says, quietly, hurried- but his mother continues to smile.

"I have suspected as much." She states. "Your friend- Park Jimin- is not very good at talking quietly." She snickers, and Jungkook curses under his breath about how he wants to strangle him. Theres a huge weight lifted off of him however; finally having said it, made it very real to him, in a way- even though it was already.

Because, after all; you were wearing his kingdom's sigil around your neck already. He had claimed you.

He's restless the next time he swims to the shore to meet you again- eager to see you to give you the news of his family's acceptance.

You're late- later than usual, and his brows are furrowed, mood upset at your mannerism. You're usually always on time, always just as eager to see him he thinks- but this time, you're not there. After his anger however, he grows increasingly worried instead. What if something had happened to you instead? Oh what a bad person he would be to be mad at you for getting into an unfortunate situation. As guilt slowly makes his way into his body, claims his muscles, he moves to sit on the stone he usually finds you on. He tries to look around- rain on his skin making it possible to be out way more comfortably.

He spots movement above.

Theres a person he can't make out- throwing something off the cliff down into the sea, and Jungkook clicks his tongue in anger, already upset- but still curious on what it was the person had been so eager to discard. Typically, its tiny things or plastic he finds- but this is something else, he knows.

Underwater, he smells blood.

His pupils contract, eyes widening, as he spots the black bag slowly making its way to the bottom of the sea- red trail leading from it. Its not the blood however that makes him frantic- its the smell of it, of you, that stops his heart.

He gets you out the bag, his anger over the entire situation diminishing into nothing as he holds you close, eyes spotting the deep cut on your side, and the scratches on your face. Unsure where to bring you, he holds you close, brings you onto his back as one of his hands hold yours, your arms around his neck. He swims quickly to the only place he knows you can breathe.

The underwater cave is big enough for now, he thinks, as he brings your body onto the ground, out the water. He doesn't notice he's crying, doesn't quite speak, his native language of clicking sounds and little noises escaping him as he whines out for your attention, waiting for you to wake up somehow. He's been so invested in making you like him and accept him that he's got no idea what to do with a human. Are you cold? How can he warm you up? How does he stop bleeding wounds? How much can you bleed before you die? Are you already dying?

Jungkook doesn't know what to do. So he simply lays by your side, holding you close, in hopes his slightly higher body temperature can keep you warm.

"He's doing the best he can-" Jimin says, Seokjin next to Taehyung as they both lean over your body. Both witches are concentrated, already exhausted, but there's no way they're giving up on you now. Not only because you're important to Jungkook- but because no one deserves to simply die like this.

"I know, I know!" Jungkook huffs out, pupils turned into cat like slits- a clear sign of the absolute terror and chaos inside of him. "What if they're best isn't good enough? Jimin, I can't loose her, you don't understand-" He starts, but Jimin holds the younger one's shoulders, for the first time serious with him.

"I do." He glances at Taehyung. Jimin had saved Taehyung before as well- the young sea witch having been hit by a fisherman's harpoon years ago. Ever since then, Jimin had been attached to the witch like glue. "Trust me, I really do. And they're doing all they can to make sure she's going to be fine." He promises, and Jungkook nods.

All he can do is pray.

When you wake up, there's several things you notice.

First, you're alive. Having a raging headache, and your limbs and muscles feel horribly tender, but you're alive. There's also strings of rope tied to two rock formations acting like a clothing line, several blankets and clothes hanging from it. They don't look human-made to you- the fabrics and designs not something you would think of as regular. There's a bucket and several stained rags- now copper-brown with old blood. Its then that you look down, seeing your cut sewed shut.

You also notice its rather soft underneath you.

Its sheepskin laid over seaweed you notice- the whool soft and fluffy, and warm. Everything seems to be so thoughtfully placed, even some decorative items- you can spot fireflies casually sitting in a jar close by, and burned wood, probably to . Probably to make light during the night. You're tired however, so you simply lay down again. Quite honestly, surely you should fee worried about the situation- but then again, there was no one to miss you, no place you called your home anyways. No use in worrying- because deep down, you had your suspicion.

A Jungkook swims to the surface with the plastic box in his arms, he's careful not to throw it too hard onto the ground. As he steps out the water, he's sure to at least try and his his hands of most the water before he goes to check on the blankets he had brought this early morning. They've dried enough, he notices, and is glad about that, as he picks one up.

You don't have to be cold anymore, he thinks.

He's unnaturally careful for his typical character- his usual behavior quite the opposite as it was now. Now, he's making sure you're properly tucked in, as he notices your eyes watching him.

He freezes, for a moment.

Jungkook hasn't really thought much about what would happen if you were to wake up- after all, Seokjin had told him he was unsure if you were to wake up this early in the first place, and Taehyung didn't even know if you would wake up at all. He'd told his younger brother to be prepared for any reaction really; fear, confusion, maybe even anger. But you seem calm, curious even, and Jungkook decides to sit down in front of your face, waiting.

"You brought me here, right?" You ask, and he nods, eyes not leaving your form.

"You-.. hurt." He points to the spot where your wound had been. "Also hurt." His hand points to your head. "Brothers, helped." He informs you, and you smile, nodding at his words. He suddenly looks at the ground, mumbling. "I.. worried. Thought... you, dying." He tells you, and you sit up slowly again, keeping the blanket around your shoulders.

"I'm not dead though." You say, and he nods. "Thank you, Jungkook. Now we're even." You say, and he tilts his head in confusion- a mannerism you could only think of as cute. "I saved you- you saved me." You say, and he smiles, nodding.

"I-" He starts, leaning forward a bit, now way more energetic and lighthearted as before. "I- we-" He growls a little in frustration, and you cant help but giggle at his troubles- the chirps and clicks escaping him foreign- but somehow, they feel hazy, as if your mind knows the language, but has forgotten what it meant. He's trying so hard you notice, and appreciate. "You like here?" He asks, and points around. You nod, and he beams at you. "I made." He tells you, proudly so.

"I guessed as much. Its very thoughtful of you, thank you." You say, and he nods, happy you like what he did for you. Its not a permanent solution, obviously, but as soon as you're healed well enough, he already planned a new spot for you to come with him.

You just don't know it yet.

There's a weird feeling inside of you.

It's like homesickness, you think. Every time you look at the waters, you feel- sad? It's making you uneasy, and with every day passing by, it just gets worse and worse. But it's today, that you cant take it.

When you dip your legs into the water, it soothes an ache you can't recognize ever having. It helps your skin, it somehow feels as if you're breathing again. But It's not enough, you think- before you let yourself fall into the deep end.

You're floating.

It's like leaving a stuffy and crowded mall, just to stand in a park, fresh air after it had rained, and light breeze clearing your head. Everything is silent, but not at the same time- the water around you feeling as if you're being hugged, held. It makes you relax, makes you let go, makes you only exist for a moment.

You're floating.

And there's a sudden wave of realization that you're also breathing. There's no water in your lungs- or maybe there is, and you just don't feel it being there. Darkness surrounds you as you don't know where you are exactly- theres no telling where is where, no way to know if you're upright or not. Maybe you've died?

Did you drown?

If you did, it would explain Jungkook being there. He's swimming towards you with a face full of worry, as he grabs your wrist and holds you close. "I can't even let you out of my sight for a mere day it seems, my love." He sighs, and your eyes widen. Its almost comedic how his own do the same, focusing on your neck, as he touches.

You're sensitive, and shift away from his touch.

"It-" He starts, now holding your shoulders, as he begins to smile. "It worked! It really did- by the dragon kind, you look absolutely divine!" He laughs, and can't help but hold your hands, eyes roaming your appearance, as you don't quite get it- until you follow his gaze.

Just like him, there's fins now on the sides of your calfs, smaller ones on your ankles as well. Theres also ones decorating your outer forearms- they look like the ones you'd always see on goldfish as a kid. There's something alike to scales as well, but barely noticable. "I- what happened to me?" You ask, and Junkook smiles.

"You.. almost died." He admits, taking your hand and swimming to what you assume is back towards the cave. "You had been robbed during the day, and when I found you.. well, you know what happened." He says. "While you were asleep, we were thinking about what to do. There was no way you would survive as a human- so, a friend of mine- Taehyung- performed a ritual, together with Seokjin, my brother." He says. You finally spot light, glad to be able to have at least some form of orientation. "I'm glad you're adjusting so quickly, my love." He states, smiling at you.

You notice the petname again.

"Jungkook-" You start, as you both reach the cave again, sitting on the edge of where the ground of the cave meets the water. "Why are you.. calling me that?" You ask, and Jungkook seems confused.

"Why do you ask?" He questions. And you don't quite follow, until he continues. "You're my mate- I am only addressing you as such."

Your eyes widen. "Wait- we're-" You start, and its only then that it clicks in Jungkooks head.

"Oh." He says- the dissapointment bitter and evident in his voice. "You.. didn't know?" He asks, and you shake your head, unsure what he means. "I see.." He tells you, suddenly distant. "I.. will bring you breakfast tomorrow.. sleep well." He abruptly says, and before you can say anything, he's already gone.

What just happened?

"There you are!" A voice says, deeper than Jungkooks, but not unfamiliar. Taehyung had been visiting and bringing you food and nescessities ever since that talk with Jungkook. This time, however, Taehyung seems like he wants to say something. You look at him, silently urging him, and he sits down next to you, sighing.

"Does he hate me?" You ask, quietly, and Taehyung looks sad.

"He could never." He says. "He just.. didn't take the rejection well. He'll need time to come around. It won't take that much time- his mother is already trying to get a new partner for him." He explains, and your head whips around towards him. "I- you.. did reject him, right?" He asks, slowly. "You do.. not love him, right?" He urges again, and you groan suddenly, throwing your face into your hands.

"Oh my god I'm so stupid.." You say. "It all.. everything was so overwhelming, I didn't even notice what he was doing." You cry into your hands, as Taehyungs hand places itself onto your back, trying to soothe you. "I though.. especially after I found out about his status.." You mumble. "How could he want me?" You ask, and Taehyung sighs.

"Head up, little siren." He says. "He's still able to hear you sing, if you want to." He says, and you look at him.

"But how?" You say. "I have no idea where the kingdom, or anything really is. And he won't come see me until its too late." You say.

"Well-" Taehyung says, standing up, and holding out his hand. "-allow me to escort the future princess to her lover."

"How did you find me?" He simply asks, not turning around, as you float closer. "I'm sorry, but I still need time to.. get over-" He starts, but you don't let him finish, instead leaning into his back, your arms around his middle.

"I'm stupid." You say. "I'm really, really stupid." He shakes his head, but you continue. "Just because I didn't realize- doesn't mean that I don't feel anything for you." You say. "I just.. felt unworthy, I guess. Insignificant." You admit, and he turns around, holding your face in his hands.

"You really are not gifted with the mind of the dragons king, my love." He states teasingly, the glimmer in his eyes returning. "My status means nothing to me, if that meant I could not have you." He says, and you lean forward, capturing his lips. "I hope you know what this meant, at least." He teases, and your eyes widen, scared you might've done something wrong. "It means you love me." He says, and you chuckle.

"Good." You say. "Because I do."

Even though he thinks you looked like a goddess reborn in your white and pearl decorated gown from the wedding, he enjoys you without it, close to him, just as much. He's alive, he's feeling, he's in love, as his hands move over your skin, his senses filled with you and nothing else.

The sounds you make for him are sweeter than any siren's song he's ever heard or could ever sing himself. No member of his kind is as enchanting as you, he decides, as he bites and kisses the sensitive skin of your neck. Jimin had teased him relentlessly the entire evening and night by trying to send you sweet words, to which you didn't react- but that didn't mean that it didn't piss him off.

You were his.

His princess- and soon to be queen, one day.

And he's planning on making that very evident, as he marks up your skin with little bites, visible for everyone to see. He wants everyone to know, even though by tomorrow, the entire Kingdom will celebrate the marriage of its prince anyways. He's more than ready to show you off, to hold you close, to have people see the divine being at his side that's you.

It's only natural for his hands to roam your skin, for his lips to worhip every inch it seems, as you reach out for his hand every second it leaves you. It's painfully endearing he thinks, how you can be so innocent and pure, while he's between your legs, performing the sinful act of pleasuring you with his mouth.

You pull him towards you, as you straddle his waist, leaning down to kiss him. He's in god's divine lands he thinks, as he suddenly feels you sinking down on his awaiting length. You fit around him perfectly, more so than he could've ever imagined. And as you both move, he holds you close, happy that here, in his world, he doesn't need to breathe.

He can kiss you as long as he wants.

(c)Bonny-Kookoo. I spilled strawberry milk on my poor laptop while writing this.

#bts imagine #bts #bts fanfic #jungkook imagine #bts fic #bts smut #bts jungkook #jeon jungkook #jungkook #bts reactions #Sing To Me AU

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luci-in-trenchcoats · 3 years

Text

If I Fell For You (Part 10) - Take Care

Summary: The reader gets to meet Danneel’s parents in a somewhat unorthodox way but receives a warm welcome to her surprise. Meanwhile, a minor medical scare makes Jensen anxious that he takes too much and doesn’t give enough to the reader...

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x nanny!reader

Square: Playing With Their Hair

Word Count: 4,800ish

Warnings: language, minor frightening situation, minor medical situation, anxiety

A/N: Please enjoy! Also written for @supernatural-jackles Tell Me A Story Bingo...

________

One Week Later

“Y/N, can we get orange?” asked Arrow from where she sat in the shopping cart. She pointed at the tubes of frosting and you took one off, handing it to her as you went back to searching for a box of red velvet mix.

“Come on,” you sighed, squatting down. You saw one shoved in the back and you bent down, reaching back to get it. You huffed when you pulled it back, the expiration date still plenty good. “Score. Okay Arrow what other color…”

She wasn’t in the cart anymore as you stood, her bright pink shirt and shorts nowhere in sight.

“Arrow!” you shouted, people from the farther end of the aisle turning to look at you. You breathed hard and spun around, exiting the aisle and looking at the checkouts. “Arrow!”

“Mam,” said a man in a white dress shirt and slacks, walking over with a headset on.

“I had a little girl with me and she’s missing and she was in the cart and I would have heard her climb out,” you said, walking quickly, the man following with you as you checked down aisles. “Arrow!”

You heard the guy talk into his headset when you caught pink and a guy near the front of the store. She spun around and you ran over, the manager not too far behind you. You didn’t say a word when you kicked the back of the guys knee and grabbed Arrow, picking her up.

“What’d I do?” he said, Arrow turning away. He looked more angry than you were expecting and you swallowed, the manager urging you back. “She’s the one that took my granddaughter!”

“She’s not your fucking granddaughter, pervert. I’m her nanny and soon to be step-mom so you can back the fuck off.”

“Step fucking what?” he said, his face going blank.

“Grandpa I told you Y/N’s my friend,” said Arrow. You blinked and stared at the man.

“Prove it,” you said. The man angrily pulled out his wallet and ripped out a picture, turning it around. It was a large group photo but you could clearly see Jensen and the kids in it along with… “You’re her father. Danneel.”

“Who the fuck are you,” he said. You took out your phone and went to your pictures, showing him one of your backyard bonfire from the weekend before.

“Is there a problem?” asked the manager. You shook your head and he rolled his eyes and left.

“Sir, I’m so sorry,” you said. He nodded and glanced down.

“Well, I can’t blame you. I understand the feeling,” he said.

“Can we...talk?” you asked.

“I think that’d be best before somebody else gets their ass kicked.”

Fifteen minutes later you had your bag of baking supplies in your trunk, Arrow was playing on the jungle gym and you were sat at a picnic table with Danneel’s parents.

“You guys came down early for JJ’s birthday, huh,” you said.

“We had to come down this weekend instead. Something came up last minute next week,” said her mom. You nodded and took a deep breath.

“I am so sorry. That is absolutely not how Jensen and I wanted to tell you both.”

“I’m old but I’m tough. I’ll survive,” said her father. You looked over to where Arrow was playing, gnawing on your bottom lip. “You said you were the nanny and soon to be step mom. Mind unraveling that for us?”

“I uh, I started working for Jensen in January as a nanny to help with the kids. The relationship part came a few weeks later. We’ve been engaged very briefly. Don’t even have a ring or anything yet,” you said, shaking your head. “Please don’t be mad at him. It’s taken him so long to stop feeling guilty for having feelings for me. Please don’t be upset with him. I don’t...I’m not trying to replace anyone or anything. I didn’t want to like him. But I did and I love him and he deserves to be happy again.”

They looked at one another and back at you.

“Good,” they both said.

“Excuse me?”

“We think he deserves to be happy too. He was in such a bad place after the accident,” she said. “He’s sounded like himself again recently.”

“Plus if you’re willing to kick my ass for thinking I took Arrow, that gets you some brownie points,” he said with a smile. You nodded and looked down at the table, swallowing. “Not what you were expecting?”

“Your daughter’s husband is engaged to a younger woman. I wouldn’t blame you at all for whatever you might think,” you said.

“He’s got a lot of time left,” he said. “He doesn’t have to be miserable for it. We don’t want that for him. It’s not what she’d want. He’s doing exactly what she’d want from him and that’s all we can ask of him. Well and maybe stick around the country for a bit so we can see the kids some more.”

“Yeah, no plans to be anywhere but home right now,” you said. You looked over at Arrow and watched her jump off a high platform. She fell down to her knees but got up and brushed them off before she was running again.

“She’d like you,” you heard, your attention going back to the two of them. She was staring at you and you smiled.

“You don’t know a thing about me mam.”

“I think we know the important parts,” she said. You nodded and glanced down. “What do Jensen’s parents think of all this?”

“They know he’s dating but that’s it. I’m supposed to meet them next week,” you said.

“We’ll keep our lips sealed for the time being then,” she said. “What about your folks? What do they think of Jensen and the kids?”

“The kids probably haven’t met either parent yet, right?” he said.

“It’s kinda complicated...I was adopted. My mom died a long time ago. I don’t have a dad or family really,” you said. You pursed your lips and picked at the corner of the table with your fingernail, the air heavy.

“Well we approve of him,” he said. “He’s a good kid.”

“I know. He’s very special,” you said. “I just wish something so horrible didn’t have to happen to him and your daughter in order to meet him.”

“We can’t change that fact,” she said. “She’d want you to take care of him, keep an eye on him. Oh and remind him to take a break and slow down every once in a while. He always gets so caught up in work and being on the go. She had to calm him down sometimes.”

“I have noticed that trend,” you said. “I hope you don’t feel like he’s going to forget-”

“No we don’t worry about that. If we learned anything from this it’s just that you have to live while you have the chance,” he said as Arrow ran over.

“Y/N, I’m hungry,” she said.

“Alright, munchkin. Why don’t we head home and maybe your grandma and grandpa will have lunch with us?” you asked.

“We’d love to,” they said. “We’ll meet you two there.”

“That went shockingly well,” said Jensen late that night when you were having an extra slice of JJ’s early birthday cake. “Those guys loved you.”

“I think we both got a little too worried over the parents situation. Dee’s parents were great, especially considering I nearly broke his knee. I’m really excited to meet yours next weekend.”

“It’s not too long of a drive up there. I haven’t been home in a long time. I’m looking forward to it too,” he said, a big smile on his face. “I’m really glad they liked you.”

“What’s not to love?” you said, Jensen smirking around his piece of cake. “You’re so hard on yourself. I’m really happy they like me too but even if they didn’t, there’s no problem there. You’re allowed to live your life. Dee wants you to keep living it.”

“I still wonder if she was just like ‘this boy is driving me nuts again, he needs a girl,’ and somehow shoved you into my life,” he said.

“Maybe. I mean, it was good timing that I was looking for a new job the same time you were looking for a nanny.”

“Did you ever report that last guy as an inappropriate employer?” he asked.

“I tell the agency but nothing criminal no. I mostly feel sorry for the families. Nannies are stability in the kids lives and leaving them isn’t easy. Unless they’re little shitheads but even then I don’t blame them, it’s the parents that turned them into it,” you said.

“What’d you think of those three, when you met ‘em I mean,” he said.

“They’re all a little shy like you but they open up if they like you. They’re pretty damn funny. They got wit and sarcasm, even if they don’t know it yet. They’re kind and intelligent and they look to you in how to act like most kids. I knew they were good kids from the start.”

“You’re gonna be a great mom,” he said. You smiled and watched him eat a piece of cake, Jensen tilting his head. “You know they have called you mom before. All three of them. Accidentally but still.”

“Being a nanny has some of the roles of a parent but there’s still a difference,” you said.

“Yeah but you’ve never just been the nanny,” he said, scraping up some frosting with his fork. “Speaking of your sudden thrust into motherhood, the whole kids thing...how many of your own were you thinking of?”

“I don’t know. I don’t need to make a baby to love it. I was adopted and my mom loved me so much. I mean there’s already three of ‘em to chase after.”

“I’d like to have a baby with you. Someday,” he said. You dabbed your finger across some frosting on the plate and sucked on it, staring at him. “I know you do. Y/N there’s no more secrets. There’s never gonna be a secret between us ever again. Sometimes you get nervous but we have to talk about these things and everything. The big choices and the little ones we make together.”

“Honestly? I don’t want you to think I’ll love them less than a kid I make. I won’t. I will treat them all the same but I don’t know how to prove that to you.”

“You told me the day I hired you that I needed to hire someone I could trust, that trust was going to be so important. Y/N, I’ve never doubted your feelings for them. Shit, I’m pretty damn sure you were in love with them before me. And I get it because they aren’t scary. They can’t hurt you like the adults can. We wouldn’t be having this conversation if I had a shred of doubt.”

“I gotta think about kids more I guess. How many, when. I don’t know that right now.”

“We’ll figure out all that when we’re ready. Just let me know and we’ll come back to this conversation,” he said, wrapping an arm around your waist. “You know...hearing about what you did at the store...that’s kinda super attractive you know.”

“Uh what?” you said, Jensen pulling you into his lap.

“You, going protective badass...that’s very, very hot you see,” he said.

“You’re such a guy,” you said while he picked up the last piece of cake on his fork.

“Well we-” he said as you leaned forward and wrapped your lips around the dessert, pulling back with a smile. “Oh you shouldn’t have done that.”

“What are you gonna do about it?” you smirked. He narrowed his eyes and set his fork down before he was standing and flipped you over his shoulder. “Jensen! Put me down!”

“Do the crime, do the time!” he said, walking over to the stairs. “Hm...what to do with you...ah I know…”

“You know…” you said before he flipped you down onto the couch and plopped down on top of you, catching most of his weight on his hands on either side of you. “Troublemaker.”

“You love it,” he said. He leaned down and kissed you, your hands wandering to his hair, holding him close. You grinned and wrapped your legs around his waist, Jensen kissing you sloppy and cheeky and like a teenage boy making out for the first time.

“Dad,” said JJ, rushing down the stairs. He dropped this forehead to yours and sighed.

“What is it?” he asked. He sat up and you both looked at her, spotting the pale tint of her skin. “Feel okay?”

“Jensen call an ambulance, now,” you said, pushing him off and going over to her. He sat up and you kneeled down next to her, her lips slightly blue. You put a hand on her chest and felt the labored breathing. “Did you eat something new tonight? Or did a bug bite you?”

“I stepped on a prickly in the bathroom a minute ago,” she said.

“Jesus,” said Jensen as he rushed into the kitchen. “She got stung by a scorpion.”

He grabbed a bottle from the cabinet and started unscrewing it.

“Jensen go see what the scorpion is and get rid of it before the twins find it,” you said. He left the bottle with you and shoved the phone against your ear. “Hi, sorry how much of the anti-venom do I give her?”

“There should be a child dosage on the bottle, half the cap,” the person on the other end said. You unscrewed the lid and poured some out, having her swallow it down. She whined and you didn’t blame her based on the smell. “An ambulance will be there shortly.”

“Thank you,” you said, spotting Jensen at the top of the stairs. He was holding his wrist and had a slightly smushed object in one of the clear plastic cups from the kids bathroom. “We have the scorpion.”

“EMT’s should be able to identify it,” she said, Jensen walking down slowly. He took a seat on the bottom step and shook his head.

“Jensen?” you said, his hand reaching for the bottle. You moved his hand from his wrist and saw two dots there. “Shit. My fiance was stung too.”

“There’s a nest in the bathroom vanity,” he said, pouring himself a dose and knocking it back. “I blocked off the door but get the twins out of there, please.”

“JJ,” you said as you saw her color get better while Jensen was getting paler. You took your phone out of your pocket and dialed, handing it to her. “Tell Uncle Jared to come over right now.”

Five minutes later Jared was there, JJ and Jensen sat in the back of an ambulance, Jensen getting a shot of something in the leg.

“We’re taking them to West County,” said a paramedic.

“I’ll see you guys soon,” you said, JJ staring worriedly at Jensen who has holding his wrist again. Jared looked around as they took off and you sighed. “Hey.”

“JJ said she and Jay got stung by a scorpion?” he asked.

“She got one as far as they can tell. Jensen got three. There’s a nest in the bathroom cupboard,” you said.

“Idiot,” mumbled Jared. You raised and eyebrow and he shook his head. “He forgot to get the pest spray done this year I bet. Dee always handled that kind of stuff. They’ve had a scorpion problem before when they first moved in.”

“Oh.”

“I’m gonna take the twins and stay the night. I’ll call and get the spray guys in first thing in the morning. You go take care of those two,” he said. You nodded and he grabbed your arm when you headed for your car. “Wait five minutes to calm down.”

“Jared I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not. You just don’t know it. Go inside, get your purse, Jensen’s wallet, take a beat, okay?”

“Okay,” you said. “Make sure-”

“I got it. Go on,” he said. “Make sure he’s not freaking out. Last time he was at a hospital it wasn’t good.”

“Right. Okay. Call me if you need something. And stay away from the kids bathroom.”

“Y/N. I know. It’ll be alright, I promise.”

One Hour Later

“Is dad okay?” asked JJ from where she sat in your lap. Jensen peeled an eye open and smiled.

“I’m okay. Sleepy is all. We’ll be home in a few hours,” he said. His wrist was bandaged and he had an IV in his arm but he’d taken the anti-venom soon enough that they had enough time to get the proper medication in both him and JJ. She was already discharged but you didn’t want to leave Jensen by himself.

“Mr. Ackles,” said a doctor when she walked in the room. “Your bloodwork came back and everything looks good.”

“Awesome,” he said, sitting up in bed. “Can I get out of here?”

“You got about fifteen minutes left on that IV drip but I’ll let the nurse know to start the paperwork. I want you to take it easy tomorrow. Nothing strenuous.”

“I got it,” he said with a nod. “Nothing strenuous.”

“Jensen,” you said around noon the next day, catching him unloading some wood from the back of his truck. “What are you doing?”

“I was gonna work on those shelves for the kid’s playroom,” he said. You crossed your arms and he threw his head back. “I feel fine. The nest got cleared out and the house got sprayed. I wanna work on this.”

“You have all the time in the world to do it. Work on it tomorrow,” you said, picking up the wood plank. He tried to take it out of your hands and you growled.

“Sorry,” he mumbled.

“Please do what the doctor said and rest today,” you said. He bit his lip and you moved the pieces of wood into the garage, Jensen leaning back against the side of the truck when you shut the trunk. “You’re scared, aren’t you.”

He nodded and glanced at his wrapped up wrist, then down to the ground.

“Hospitals freak me out now,” he said. “I don’t like bugs. My body hurt and knowing I forgot to do something so simple put them in danger sucks. Knowing if she hadn’t come downstairs it might have been real bad sucks. If you hadn’t noticed I don’t know if I would have and it scares me not knowing.”

“Close your eyes for me,” you said. He shut them and took a deep breath, letting you take his hand and walk around to the back of the house. You spun him around a few times stopping him so he was facing the pool about twenty feet away. “Know where you are?”

“Somewhere in the middle of the backyard,” he said. “What are you doing?”

“You said not knowing scared you. Lots of times you don’t know. It’s kinda just how life works,” you said, dropping his hand and moving a few feet away. “Take a big step forward.”

“Y/N, I don’t like this,” he said, fidgeting his hand along the bottom of his shirt.

“I know you don’t. But would I hurt you?”

“No,” he said.

“So listen to me. Big step forward.” He took a step and you looked around. “Jump backwards.”

“What?”

“Jump backwards.” He frowned and took a small bunny hop back. “Again.”

“I feel ridiculous.”

“Says the guy who plays pretend for a professional career. Now hop back and then step to the right,” you said. He groaned and did as asked. “Jog forward until I say stop.”

“Are you trying to kill me out here cause I feel like I’m about to break my neck slipping in the pool.”

“I’m trying to get your anxiety out in a non-life threatening way, okay?”

“By having me jump around the backyard like an idiot.”

“By having you get comfortable with the fact that most of life is spent not knowing and you can’t change that fact. You can’t see it all coming.”

He threw his head back but kept his eyes shut. He stared to run towards you and you wrapped your arms around him when he got there, Jensen peeling them open slowly.

“See? I wasn’t gonna let anything bad happen,” you said. He nodded and rested his forehead on your shoulder, pulling you into a squeezing hug. “You okay?”

“I’m sorry for being short and not doing what the doctor asked,” he said.

“Hey, it’s alright. I got scared too last night. Everything is fixed now so no need to worry over it. Why don’t you take a nap and maybe we have a real quiet lazy day while Dee’s parents got the kids for the day,” you said. “Sound fun?”

“Okay,” he said. “I’ll take quiet today.”

Three hours later Jensen was curled up with a blanket, his head resting in your lap as you watched a movie together. You played with his hair, Jensen turning into the touch every so often.

“I know you’re worried about me,” he said. He turned and faced up at you, your fingers swirling in his strands. “I know I’m kinda clingy today which I’m normally not.”

“You can cling all you want, honey,” you said, stroking his cheek with your thumb. “I wish life would give you a break for a second. No work, no badness. Just some peace and quiet for you.”

“My parents lived here after the accident. For a few months. They were here, Jared and Gen were over every day, my siblings would stop down every week. The first few months I understood. I had an injury I had to recover from. But I felt like a child those few months once I recovered. Everyone taking care of the kids, of me. I was barely a father to them. Playtime. A story at bed. Someone else made most of their meals, did everything for them.”

“You’re a father but you’re still someone’s child,” you said. He blinked and you shrugged. “You were hurt, possibly the worst out of anyone. I know taking care of everyone else is your default but people get to take care of you too. I get to take care of you.”

“I feel like all I do is get taken care of by you,” he said. “I never give it back.”

“You’ve given me a family again. You take care of me every single day.”

“I never see you getting upset. It’s always me. I’m always the fuck up,” he said. You slumped down and took a deep breath.

“I get upset Jensen. I got upset that very first time we fought, that night with the ice cream. I got upset when you got jealous of that nanny in Canada and we saw my father the first time. I got upset telling you the truth of it all because you of all people don’t need problems like that dumped at your feet. I got upset when we saw him again because I was scared and I was scared he might hurt you too. I got upset when we fought when you got home and I got upset when you proposed because you were so scared and I get upset Jensen. I get upset when you’re hurt. I get upset when I hurt. But I don’t have all those safety nets under me that you do, remember? I just got a couple right now and you’re my last resort. I’ve been my own support system for so long that I can’t undo that all overnight. I know it’s been months but the fact I even let you see me cry, the fact I can even talk about this stuff with you and know all you’re thinking about is how to make me feel better...I still need to heal too. You’ve done so much already. I’m gonna have my moments where this is switched, believe me. But today’s not my turn for that, it’s yours.”

“I love you,” he said, staring up with the softest green eyes you’d ever seen on him yet. “Even more than five minutes ago if that’s possible.”

“I love you,” you said, bending down and kissing him. “You’re the expert on the falling in love stuff though so I’ll leave that up to you.”

“It’s very...it’s what you think it is and it’s not at all what you think. There’s falling and nerves and then calm and then falling and calm and you spend the rest of your life doing that. It’s not magic and it takes work to keep it alive sometimes but all you gotta do is talk. Just talk and it always seems to work out for me,” he said.

“Can I tell you a secret?” you asked. He nodded and smiled as you went back to playing with his hair.

“You know I really like when you do that,” he said.

“I know you do. It relaxes you,” you said.

“Makes me feel safe too,” he said. “But what’s your secret cause eventually I’m gonna want to know them all.”

“I was very attracted to you when we met. But that kinda freaked me out a bit. I found myself liking you a lot that first day I was here. You got me a birthday cake. I realized how kind you are that night. It wasn’t for anyone’s benefit other than my own. I had a crush on you, even though I knew it wouldn’t go anywhere.”

“I had a crush on you from when you made me a cup of coffee. You’re so good and kind yourself,” he said. He reached up and cupped your cheek. “I’m really happy you had your mom eventually. I would have liked to have met her.”

“Maybe she and Dee are hanging out wherever they are.”

“I hope so. She won’t mind sharing me with you,” he said.

“You honestly think so?”

“You gonna mind sharing me with her?” he asked.

“I’ve always shared you. Just hope that wouldn’t bother her.”

“I used to think maybe it would but no, she wants me to be happy and that’s you so you got all eternity to get to know each other eventually if you think about it.”

“Well when you put it that way we got nothing to worry about,” you said.

“Oh don’t worry about that. I think your mom was right. I get to have two people is all, kinda like she did,” he said.

“She would have liked you. Would have said you’re a little old for me but she would have liked you.”

“Wasn’t she older than Ray?” he asked.

“Yeah. She was. She was only fifty,” you said.

“You grew up too fast,” he said quietly.

“Maybe. But it got me here and I don’t think I would have done anything different. I wouldn’t want to screw that up. Well I’d do one thing different.”

“What?”

“Drop by this house, have a conversation with a certain someone.”

“Say hypothetically you had that ability, you’d really do that knowing what you’re giving up?”

“I’d give her back to you right this second if I could.”

“I appreciate that, really,” he said. He let his hand fall down and reach around your back, curling around your waist. “But she’s not more important than you are. I miss her. Everyday. But I lose one of you either way in that scenario. And I can’t choose. I’ll never be able to. If she were here and you weren’t, I’d still be just like this. It’d still hurt.”

“Make me a promise. I keel over early, you try again. Try for both of us.”

“I will if you will,” he said. He held up his pinky finger and you grabbed it with yours. “But he can’t be hotter than me.”

“Equally as hot?”

“Slightly less hot but that’s my final offer,” he said.

“Eh, fine,” you said. “You’ve worn me down.”

“Always words I want to hear,” he chuckled. You slid further down the couch until you were practically laying back, your arms wrapping around him. He got up and lay down with you on the wrap around side of the couch, pulling you into his chest. “Can I take you to dinner tonight? Just us.”

“Yeah. I’d like that.”

“Okay, honey,” he said, kissing your forehead. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Just thanks. For what you said. What you did earlier, just being with me,” he said.

“Lucky for you I like being with you a whole lot,” you said.

“Very lucky for me,” he said. “Very lucky indeed.”

______

A/N: Read Part 11 here!

#supernatural #tell me a story bingo #SPN #jensen ackles au #jensen x reader #jensen acklees #jensen series #rpf series #jensen ackles x reader #spn fanfic #jensen ackles fanfic #supernatural fanfic

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