#exactly jamie

[bignostalgias]

🎃 🍂 they’re here to burgle your turts! 🍂 🎃

+ bonus borthers

[chaoticwhoknows]

do you guys ever think about jamie tartt and sam obisanya bc i do. constantly. they take up so much room in my brain. going from “no one in my entire career had made me feel worse about myself than jamie did” to sam and jamie being comfortable enough to constantly tease each other like siblings and swarm each other during goal celebrations and SAM being one of the first people (along with roy) who we see being concerned about jamie in mom city. JAMIE WEARING SAM’S NUMBER WHEN HE PLAYED FOR ENGLAND. season 3 jamie and sam are so… just so… they’re soooooooo!!! and season 2 jamie and sam are like hey what if i reached out to you through a series of seemingly small gestures in very vulnerable moments of yours bc i don’t know how to properly show that i care about you given the history between us until eventually we were just completely in sync with each other? what then?

and don’t even get me started on the parallels between them. ladies and gentlemen THE PARALLELS. the JUXTAPOSITIONS. the OTHER WORDS. their relationships with their fathers alone is so much to unpack. them cutting to JAMIE’S reaction when ola walked in and hugged sam in the locker room separately from the reaction of the rest of the team. the creators knew what they were doing with that

[kneworder]

man everyone in the first movie told him he'd get stabbed in the side while going for the throat. and what did he learn.

[walnutmistjamie]

Roy and the bicycle falling — requested by anon

[hollow-keys]

Instinctively calling for Jamie FOUR regenerations later.

[lokiiied]

[i-like-media]

That's how it went, right

[thetarttfuldickhead]

The call connects and there’s Roy, seemingly back at his own house, seated on a grey couch and wearing a scowl dark enough to match his t-shirt and jacket.

Trent smiles, though carefully not too wide. “Hello Roy. Thank you for agreeing to this.”

Roy grunts. “Better you than any of the other wankers,” he mutters.

Trent makes an effort to hide his grin. Visibly gloating about having the sort of access to Roy Kent that other journalists – independent or disgraced or otherwise – can only dream of isn’t likely to get him the exclusive comments that he needs from Richmond’s head coach on today’s kerfuffle.

“So,” he offers smoothly, “what do you—“

He’s cut off by the loud bang of a door slamming shut on the other end and a startled fuck from Roy and then there’s Jamie Tartt’s head coming into view as it flops down on Roy’s lap. He must have thrown himself down onto the couch.

“It’s all such fucking bullshit, man,” Jamie pronounces dramatically as he – Trent’s eyebrows rise another inch – grabs Roy’s arm and pulls it over his chest, claiming half a cuddle. “Did you know—“

“I’m in the middle of an interview, you twat,” Roy barks, but he does not, Trent notes with increasing interest and incredulity, remove his arm.

“Since when do— ?” Lifting his head from Roy’s lap, Jamie blinks at the screen. “Oh! Uh. Hi, Trent! How you doin’, you good?” His grin is wide, easy, with no hint of embarrassment, and Trent finds himself smiling back. Jamie has always been charismatic, but the last few years have seen his swagger turn into a good-natured charm that’s surprisingly hard to resist.

“I’m fine, thank you, Jamie. And regarding the news this afternoon, how do you—“

“No,” Roy immediately says, shifting to push Jamie off his lap in spite of the younger man’s indignant protests. “He has no fucking comment. He’s not part of this conversation. He’s not even fucking here.”

“The fuck are you on about, mate, he can see I’m— “

“Go to the kitchen,” Roy interrupts. “Get me a whisky. If I have to listen to you complain about wankers on Twitter or split fingernails or whatever, I need a fucking drink.”

“You’re an arsehole,” Jamie tells him from out of the picture, but he doesn’t sound particularly upset. “I haven’t even got any split fingernails.” And then he must be off because he doesn’t say anything else and Roy turns back to Trent, glaring like he’s daring Trent to say it.

Trent, with equal parts cunning and self-preservation, says nothing at all. Waits.

Eventually, Roy’s shoulders drop a millimeter. He lets out a huff. “Jamie’s fucking needy, all right? He needs fucking hugs and shit and he turns into a moody bitch prima donna if he doesn’t get them, so.” He presses his lips together, having apparently said all he intends to say on the subject.

Trent had noticed Jamie’s fondness for hanging off anyone's and everyone’s shoulder during his season with the team. He hadn’t known and would never have imagined, though, that Roy would ever be willing to indulge the tendency, especially not to this degree. And that rather begs the question...

“Roy,” he says carefully. “You know that, if the two of you are—“

“We’re not.” And Roy closes his eyes, shakes his head. Opens them, looking resigned, but looking a little bit wry too. “Be less fucking weird if we were, wouldn’t it? But we’re not. It’s just… “ He pauses. Shakes his head again. “It’s Jamie. Just… fucking Jamie.”

“Except you are not,” Trent says, just to be clear, just because being a bit of an asshole is a habit, and fun.

“Except I’m not,” Roy growls, and looks like he’s about to add something more – something scatching and imaginatively insulting, Trent assumes – but then he lifts his head, turning towards someone offscreen. “What— ? Yeah, we’re fucking done. Bye, Crimm,” he adds, and then the screen goes dark as Roy abruptly ends the call.

“Bye, Roy,” Trent tells the silence. “I’ll just text you the questions, shall I? You can get back to me when you’re done giving Jamie Tartt a cuddle.”

[wayward-wren]

I am thinking about. Jamie and the Second Doctor.

Because out of all the incarnations of the Doctor, Two is arguably the one who uses manipulation and disguises the most. He thrives on using people's intelligence against them, on tricking people, on bluffing and his bluffs working. He has a different disguise every story pretty much and is constantly playing some kind of role.

And then you look at Jamie, and some of Jamie's most front and center traits are his loyalty and his honesty (and protectiveness, but less applicable). Jamie is loyal to a fault and extremely trusting of the Doctor. He's honest and straightforward and deeply caring.

And Jamie is the one who sticks by the Second Doctor for as long as he physically can--and you'd look at those two characters, one who is manipulative and cunning, and one who is loyal to a fault, and you'd think the Doctor would easily be able to take advantage of Jamie, that Jamie would just be a tool for him but he's not, they're on equal footing. Jamie pulls the Doctor down and reminds him what being human is all about.

[ambnight]

You snooze you looze 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

[trentcrimminallybeautiful]

listen we all know who im obsessed with. it doesn't take rocket science to figure it out. but i've got to say. roy kent truly is just. such a character. truly a stunning example of peak blorbo material. just look at him. look at everything about him. that sure is. a guy. and not in the like generic "that's just a guy" way in the indescribable "wow. what a guy" way. what a guy. i love him

[lunar-years]

did anyone ever write the fic where Rupert's scheme to get Cartrick/West Ham to incapacitate Jamie/injury him out of the game is successful? If so please drop me the fic links/recs my hands are wide open 👐🙏

[thefiresofpompeii]

i think one of the main reasons why i’m not connecting to thirteen’s companions is that they don’t get put through the wringer by themselves, they aren’t given the chance to prove themselves outside of the doctor’s immediate influence. amy was constantly being turned into a doll or a vampire or a flesh copy of her body or staying in an alien health facility for 30 years or falling pregnant or being possessed by a weeping angel or having her memories extracted to build a mythical prison for her best friend or falling pregnant or being cloned by a tesselecta or. you get it. clara was always being locked inside a dalek or uploaded to the cloud or travelling through the doctor’s timestream or being left to fend for herself against dimension-shifting creatures or being locked inside a zygon pod. you get the gist. they were vital to the plot both in one-off episodic stories and overarching arcs in a way that reached beyond giving the doctor pep talks to cheer them up and following them around asking questions.

what exactly has ryan done by himself apart from following the instructions on the plane which had been left by the doctor anyway? what exactly has graham done apart from grieving for his dead wife? what exactly has yaz accomplished on her own apart from that one 2-minute sequence in spyfall where she got transmatted to the kasaavin realm?

they hardly serve any purpose to further the story. they just hang around. space tourists, not companions. even in danger they just seem to rely on the doctor’s intelligence to clever them out of it and save their lives, not once so far (i’m halfway through s12) have any of them shown proper initiative or any distinguishing traits beyond a corny sense of humour tbh

[mitskijamie]

Jamie eats a protein shake and 2 celery sticks for dinner and he sends a picture to Roy and is like "haha girl dinner 🤪🔥" and Roy is like "What? What the fuck are you talking about? Eat some chicken. I'm going to kill you"

[susiehunsecker]

If outlander was a good show it would've been frank getting thrown into the past having weird misogynist psychosexual yaoi with jamie

[em-ptynet]

hey do we think tk hung out with nolpat when the flyers were in winnipeg last season but now that nolpat isn't pretending to still be a knight he can be seen visiting them publicly