#female ramser’ika

[a-lil-perspective]

*baby Keida toddles along, tentatively*

Crosshair: *to Delana* Look, hon.

Crosshair: The baby’s taking her first—

Baby Keida: *runs up and strangles Asher*

Crosshair: …Life.

[a-lil-perspective]

One of the sniper babies.

[a-lil-perspective]

Crosshair taking lil miss Keida out grocery shopping

Crosshair: *holding Kiki’s hand whilst they stroll along*

Keidala: *sudden epiphany* *gasps* I WANT A BLASTER WITH A SILENCER.

Crosshair: Alright. If it’s on sale.

[a-lil-perspective]

Crosshair and miss Keida eating out at a diner

Waitress: Police and kids five and under eat free! :)

*Crosshair, discreetly nudging his 6-year-old*

Keida: I’m a police.

[a-lil-perspective]

Sniper babies according to Delana:

Delana: First child (Asher): Love. Sweet kisses. Sticky hugs. Laughter. Cuteness. Joy. More hugs. Adventure. Mini-me. Mini-Crosshair. Crosshair’s smile. Silly dancing. Dressing up. Snuggle bunny. Drawing bunnies. Mac and Cheese. Blue’s Clues. Drawings for the fridge. Paper ships. I'll have one more of these, please.

Delana: Second child (Keidala): Rabid monkey climbing walls. Opening cabinets. Undoubtedly preparing for world domination. Escape artist. Crosshair’s scowl. Chess snobbism. Running. Running faster. Green marker self-tattoos. Hugs are for the weak. Ripping leaves off plants and showering them on the cat. Murder on the brain. Screaming.

[a-lil-perspective]

Crosshair has definitely called his bebos his “spawns” before lol.

[a-lil-perspective]

Keidala assertively telling her teacher, “You know, I just don’t think my learning needs are being met here.”

It’s day three of kindergarten.

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Keida and her papa Cross. XD

[a-lil-perspective]

Other Parents vs Crosshair

I told you sniper baby shenanigans.

• Seeing your child pointing a gun

Other Parents: Oh my God, put that down, PUT THAT DOWN RIGHT NOW, where did you even get that—!!??

vs

Crosshair: *not even glancing up from his paper* Keida, don’t shoot your brothers, it’s nine in the morning.

[a-lil-perspective]

Crosshair: *witnessing Asher and Keida sitting quietly on the couch with seemingly nothing amiss* Hey kids. Dinner in five.

Keida: Yeah okay.

Asher: Thank you, father.

Crosshair: *walks away, feeling suspicious*

Asher: *immediately lets out a panicked breath, checks underneath the cushion to behold Jude laying motionless* *panicking* You think we gave him a concussion???

Keida: *shrugs* I think for his own good, he’s dead.

[a-lil-perspective]

I saw this and immediately thought of Hunter’s daughter or Crosshair’s daughter 🤣

~

CROSSHAIR AND KEIDA F O R S U R E.

[a-lil-perspective]

Pfft, I just got this funny scenario. Imagine Crosshair stumbles upon a grumpy, tired Keida and he being the great papa he is:

Cross: You okay Sweetheart?

Keida: Yeaaaah, my body and I are just having a fight.

Cross: Did you eat something…?

Keida: No no, it’s just that my body wants a kid but I don’t want a kid cause you know I’m only 15 and now I’m being punished by stabbing pains and misery.

Cross: …..You could’ve just said ’I’m on my period’

HAHA yes, I love this!! Definitely perfect for them. I’ve talked about how Crosshair as a Buir is very seasoned in this kind of talk, he’s not at all phased by it, he’s been around a lot of females over the years lolol. Melodramatic Keida my beloved.

[a-lil-perspective]

*someone flirting with Keida*

Stranger: Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?

Keidala: Oh, no sir. Today is my first day outdoors, and Father forbade mirrors in the house lest we fall victim to vanity.

[a-lil-perspective]

Picture this: Crosshair and Delana, in bed. Three kids span between them. Their kids. It feels like a lifetime ago it was his nieces, over for their weekly visit of snuggles and stories; all the while harping on about when they can expect cousins. Crosshair chuckles to himself. The soft sounds of snores fill the sweet space of his reminisce, bringing him back the present, making his heart swell for the children and wife in his presence, the life she’s given him. He looks over each of the beautiful renditions of he and her. The baby is closest to Dee. She’s stroking Jude’s face as he sleeps, and she can feel Crosshair’s gaze on her, on them. She looks up and catches his eye. The fine lines around her face mold with her smile. She smiles at him, and his heart leaps with newness the way it did the first time she ever smiled at him. He feels his own face shift with a smile, holding her gaze as she reaches across and caresses his face, the refined makings of a beard. He leans into her touch while the children snooze soundly between. They share an unspoken language as they hold each other’s gaze. It’s perfect. It’s bliss. Crosshair thinks his life couldn’t get anymore perfect.

[a-lil-perspective]

Asher, on the verge of tears, shuffling into Keida’s room at 11:55 at night with his datapad in hand: Hi.

Keida: Bug bro? What’s wrong??

Asher: *sniffling* I forgot to do my Duolingo lessons all day and now it’s too late.

Keida: What language?

Asher, barely holding it together: Porgunese. I was doing so good.

Keida: *holding out her hand* How long as the streak?

Asher, now full on crying: Five-hundred days.

Keida: Stop your crying. I’m a speedster. I can do it.

Asher: ?? You don’t know Porgunese though.

Keida: I do, actually! I learnt it like a week ago when Dad was giving me some boring lecture on responsibility or whatever. I learn at super speed. Give it here.

Asher: *reluctantly hands over his datapad*

Asher: Wait… did you learn this just so you could impress Jude? You know how much he loves Porgs—

Keida: !!!

Keida: …

Keida: I have no personal ties to that young man whatsoever.

[a-lil-perspective]

Crosshair and Keida having a special song and it’s “Miss American Pie”

She loves it, and asks for it all the time.

“Daddy, I want my song.”

Crosshair smiles softly as he plays it for her.

She doesn’t catch all the words, humming a broken tune until she reaches the chorus - the only part she knows by heart.

“So bye-bye miss American pie…”

A pause.

“Come on daddy.”

Keida continues. “Drove my Chevy to the levee..”

Crosshair joins in. “But the levee was dry.”

Keida: “THEM GOOD OLE BOYS.”

Crosshair: *chuckles softly* “Drinking whiskey and rye.”

Crosshair falters on the next line.

“Singing, this will be the day that I die..”

Keidala, with enthusiasm: “tHiS’LL bE tHE dAY tHAT I diEEEEE.”

Dee: 😑 Asher: 😬