#filoni: i think we're going to have to kill this guy

[frasier-crane-style]

I'm not sure Ahsoka is even a story

People have been comparing the writing to an AI and... they've got a point there. I mean, stuff happens... barely... but it's like there's no attempt to dramatize or sex things up or impart any excitement or conflict or nuance into the story. Dave Filoni has one move and it's spamming lightsaber fights and starship dogfights constantly.

(Speaking of which, remember in the movies when lightsaber fights would end with SOMEONE dying or at least being maimed? People get IMPALED in Ahsoka and they're there in the next scene like "get some sleep, you need it." Like being impaled by a lightsaber is a cold. Not even a bad cold. They might as well put the lightsabers away and settle things by arm-wrestling, it resolves as much!)

(I'm convinced that Marrok was a studio note added at the last minute because someone realized they had made a show with eight hours of people trying to kill each other with laser swords and no one actually dying.)

I actually read a quote by Timothy Zahn where his idea was that, in their decade-long exile together, Thrawn and Ezra had been forced into an uneasy alliance against an even greater threat. Like, yeah! That's dramatic! That's Something and not Nothing.

When you watch the show, though, it's more like they've just gone off to summer camp. Ezra sees Sabine again and he's just like "hi, how are you?" He's older and he hasn't changed at all. Neither has Thrawn. He's painted his Star Destroyer a bit and he calls his Stormtroopers Nighttroopers now (surely not to sell new merchandise instead of the same old action figures)... other than that, no change in his character whatsoever. Same guy.

Oh, he's teamed up with the Nightsisters, but that just amounts to him getting the obligatory Imperial superweapon. Does anyone really think this isn't going to turn into another plot coupon quest to stop him from using his new toy to destroy the New Republic before it gets destroyed anyway?

I mean, how can you not brainstorm SOMETHING interesting happening with this setup? It's impressive! A kind of anticreativity.

What if Sabine was in love with Ezra, then gets there and finds out he's gotten hitched to a cute Rodian or something. Or maybe he's gone kind of mad with isolation and is using the Dark Side, but doesn't know better in his crazed state?

Or Thrawn could be this Colonel Kurtz figure who's gone around the bend and his Stormtroopers all worship him like a cult leader. Like, right now, what does he even have against the New Republic? Why does he like the Empire so much? What is he trying to achieve? What benefit does he get from challenging the NR over simply suing for peace? It's insane--this one specific character is meant to be a galaxy-killing threat based solely on him as a person, but we know nothing about him as a person. (And he squeaks out a victory over three people, BARELY, and we're supposed to buy that the universe should be quaking in its boots.)

Filoni actually even stumbles upon a good vein of drama. Sabine betrays the galaxy to save her platonic friend. No one cares. Ezra doesn't care, Ahsoka doesn't care--why should the audience care?

Ahsoka trains Sabine to be a Jedi (that's its own rant, by the way), but stops because she worries Sabine will go the same way as Anakin. Jedi are all about nonattachment and Mandalorians are all about clans and lineage. Then, at the worst possible moment, Sabine proves her right, makes the exact same choice that Anakin did to go with saving a loved one over the fate of the galaxy... and Ahsoka just shrugs and goes "eh, no big!"

And I get it. I'm a comic book fan. I don't want to see noble, experienced characters flying off the handle at the drop of a hat and attacking their loved ones because it's their turn to hold the conflict ball. But these characters have no emotions at all! I don't care how good a person you are, if your bestie sells a nuke to Neo-Nazis to get you out of debt, you should probably raise your voice a little.

Also, is the last episode the first time they actually set up that Ahsoka and Sabine's conflict is over this "I'm afraid of her turning out like Anakin" thing? Well after it's resolved? Why? You have eight hours of TV show, you can set this up early on and then pay it off later (not next season, but later).

'Ahsoka has an astral-plane pow-wow with Anakin and gets over her issues' is a decent plot, but you have to actually depict her issues ahead of time, you have to dramatize them in a certain way so we know what the heck you're talking about!

Imagine if in Back To The Future, the first time we saw George McFly was when he punched out Biff and saved Lorraine. You wouldn't care at all, right? It's just a guy punching another guy. We have to know that George is a pussy and that Biff is his tormentor and that he's in love with Lorraine from afar--once we know all that context, THEN it's a triumph for him to punch Biff.

Your show can't just be people punching each other out! It also has to be reasons to give a shit about the punching!

You don't have to spell everything out, but you can't just show Rosario Dawson crossing her arms and expect us to know "oh, she's traumatized from Anakin becoming Darth Vader, she never got over that." You have to put that into words and imagery! Show us her ACTING! Let us RELATE to her! Introduce these people to us and let us get to know them! You can't coast on everyone already liking them because they look like old cartoon characters.

[just-prime]

Just read all your Ahsoka reviews, they're great, thanks for writing them

I think the reason Thrawn's eyes look off is the same why as Ahsoka's, Hera's, Ezra's, just anyone with the weird contact thing going on, all do. In real life you can't actually clearly make out someone's eye color from like across a room distance, but they've given this always noticeable almost florescent glow to the eyes. You can do that fine in animation but in live action it becomes uncanny valley

Very much agreed that the worst thing is the feeling of nothing happening. The show isn't paced to stand on its, it's meant to exist as part of the filoni cinematic universe. The mcu-ification of media is a f-ing plague upon the soul of art

And speaking of nothing happening WHAT IS SABINE DOING like she knows she's got a very short time to somehow steal the hyperspace ring so they can get back and stop Thrawn from returning, but she's just like nah I'll just tell Ezra nothing and chill out with him I AM PULLING MY HAIR OUT

Also just a last thing that was (painfully) funny to me that I haven't seen anyone else point out, at one point Sabine slashes a guy in the face then stabs him in the chest, then STILL kicks him away from her which is what actually knocks him over, BECAUSE LIGHTSABERS CAN! NOT! KILL IN THE NEW STAR WARS

Sorry I started out thanking you for your great posts, but then ended up just ranting in your inbox, totally no worries if you just want to completely ignore this ask lol

First off holy shit I have my first ask!!! I was in class when I saw the notification, so I couldn't get up and do a little happy dance...But know that I wanted to.

Anyway, YES on everything about the eyes. That's exactly it. You've managed to put words to what felt off perfectly. SO thank you, because yes, to all of it.

Also, yes, the mcu-ification of media is indeed a FUCKING plague upon the soul of art

I say this as a recovering MCU fan who's coping with the death of her childhood via fanfiction but seriously not everything needs to be set up for something else.

Also, it feels like this should have been a movie. 2 hours, maybe even 3, but then everyone would be in position and we wouldn't have to deal with all the stupid filler.

Yup, Sabine is horrifically out of character. She's nonchalant about things she should care about. She cares about thinks she should be nonchalant about. It's painful, and annoying, and I can relate to wanting to pull my hair out.

It is laughable to me that we've gotten this far and lightsabers are still functionally just swords? Like, we've not gotten to see someone doing something cool with them in a while. I totally agree also that they've been watered down, which is a shame because we're finally getting to the point effects-wise where we could be doing some really cool shit with them, and instead they are left as poke-y sticks.

Thank you so much for dropping into my ask box. Thank you especially for the rant. It was very fun to read. If it helps assuage the anxiety, know that not too long ago I was the on leaving anonymous blocks of text thanking people for the validation and also ranting a bit too :P

[twilightofthe]

okay i put all my cranky thoughts into a separate post that's now drafted and it made me feel better so i'll be able to watch this episode now lol but if it gets me worked up again i'm posting the rant i'm sorry i cannot be helped or changed or saved <3

ANYWAY AHSOKA EP 2

also i forgot to say so last episode but kevin kiner my ABSOLUTE BELOVED the return of the king is real so happy to have you here my dude the ending and full theme was absolutely gorgeous

anywayyyyyy so i am guessing sabine did not make like satine and survived her shish kabobing

well there's ahsoka

oh yeah there's bean she's fine she'll be fine xD

damn filoni really gave more handwaving to having a character survive a major impalement vs me twisting myself into fucking knots writing anakin getting run through lmao

ahsoka sorry but actually i'm gonna blame u for this you still kinda seem like a mess and i don't think you were a very good teacher to sabine and now ur dropping back in on her when she's convenient to you?

well at least we know why she's so adamant against training baby yoda lol

ope here's goth girl and the fuuuuck is his NAME again i keep calling him fucking bryan

i like the fancy sithy-looking sundial tho

pfff second ep is "toil and trouble" guess we're getting witchy!

OH YEAH WAS SABINE'S KITTY OKAY

THEY BETTER BE OKAY

I SWEAR TO GOD

yea ahsoka what happened to showing up in the nick of time and saving kanan and ezra from inquisitors in rebels u were slowwww girlie

OK GOOD THE CAT IS OKAY

that's all that matters

ope one more droid hanging around ezra's place

GIRL UR SITTING UP ALREADY?!

GIRL HOW CAN U BREATHE

we do love the mechanic girl of my heart

sabine does love her explosions

no huyang hera just likes explosions

sabine works best under explosive pressure we LOVE HER

ope back to corellia i guess? we can reuse the old solo sets?

sabine

you were just

impaled

"but she's not the one who needs to hear it right now" ahhh there's the sabine and hera dialogue. ugh but i'm still not used to natasha and mary i can just hear tiya and vanessa doing it instead :(

WHY DO Y'ALL KEEP MAKING SABINE AND AHSOKA ANGRY EXES TF

"ancient ppl from a distant galaxy" waaaaaaait are they bringing in those eu dudes

no wait i think i remember something about these guys that was mention as the big bad in the canceled animated rebels sequel

or it could just be the chiss lmao

that could be it too, makes sense why they'd want thrawn

ok that is some real cool galactic map visuals i am an absolute sucker for a good starmap

ok but wait how the fuck did y'all get a map to thrawn anyway did the space whales write it

also sorry morgan but i don't personally think thrawn would go for u nothing personal you are hot but you don't quite seem his type

waaaait is fucking thrawn gonna have force sensitivity now THAT would be absolutely hilarious and he'd hate it so much

who's marrok i have no memory

y'all you can't just make thrawn work for you didn't he only work with the empire cuz he had to because it would advantage his people somehow (has read zero thrawn novels and only seen rebels)

please tell me sabine is in the fucking vents of ahsoka's ship

THERE'S THE GHOST WHERE IS CHOPPER

I AM NO LONGER FUCKING ASKING

okay so i think my issue with Mary is she doesn't have any of the same authority and purpose Hera's meant to hav

CHOPPER

CHOPPER

MY MURDERBOT

MY SON

MY ANGEL MY EVERYTHING

Anyway

yeah

oh yeah harping in that the new republic is a total fustercluck

ew a capitalist

bro you know hera used to steal from people like you for the rebellion

sdlkfjsdk omg sabine's mom needs to talk to the teacher to keep her from getting expelled

but also y'all sabine is like 25-30 right now she's not a kid

@ ahsoka bitch you have no fuckin clue what you're doing doooon't talk about readiness

y'know maybe the imperial era just advanced medicine so later impalements don't kill people

oh oh so it IS ezra's!

sabine go find luke he'd love to have you

STOP WITH THE GAY DIALOGUE

ok so yeah she likely doesn't have force sensitvity

goddammit huyang neverMIND

so sabine IS force sensitive :) and kanan and ezra just never brought it up :) great :)

hera my beautiful ship nerd ily

bitch do NOT fuck with hera she has more presence than anyone ever

hera my dude you know better than anyone that if a ship wants to take off you gotta go try and stop it in person

ah i have been waiting like 5 long years to watch hera best pilot there was kick aerial ass

we STAN

chopperrrrrrrrr

oh yeah ahsoka's fighting an inquisitor too lmao

CHOPPER GET THEIR ASS

CHOPPER ADD TO YOUR KILL COUNT

ok this hera and chopper banter is perfect i do love it

VICTORY FOR MY GHOSTS

oh and good job ahsoka lol

aghhh sabine and her therapy cat i'm ;_;

theeeeere's sabine's mando armor

SABINE AND KANAN'S FUCKIN KNIFE I'M GONNA EVEN IGNORE THE BAD MULAN HACKJOB ATTEMPT

okay it seems like mary's kinda on and off for hera so far, she has her moments but she can't hold them

rosario keeps losing me i'm sorryyyyyyyy

natasha is doing GREAT

aaaaaand we redoing the end of the rebels epilogue!

god this makes me miss zeb

and kanan obvs but i've come to accept his death

zeb's still hanging around where is he!!!!!

ah all is right

sabine has her gay haircut back

here we go gay roadtrip to find ezra time

alright so i'm still not really vibing with jedi!sabine at All but i have concluded that this show is watchable but honestly not that good, writing-wise, sorry dave, so i think i'll be able to watch it with my brain turned off

goddammit first i thought the holograms visiting morgan were nightsister witch ghosts xD

RIGHT RIGHT HIS NAME IS BAYLAN NOT BRYAN

morgan stop simping for thrawn i guaranTEE he's not your type

oKAY

we are through with the two episodes! it is very late for me so i'm gonna sit and think on what i've seen so far and shitpost a little. i did really like seeing my rebels blorbos again even if the live action actors don't quite have their groove yet. obviously very excited to retrieve ezra <3 so yeah that was that and i'll be back for more next week!

[sound-overlord]

just watched the ending of the second season of rebels and here's the thots that are now in my mind in no particular order:

kanan called maul grandpa

mauls cane saber that he rips apart to be dramatic

how long was maul there before the jedi-ish arrived ? like did he have to wait for them im assuming he had some force vision or w/e that told him both abt the temple/weapon and ezra but like.... was he living there or ?

grandpa maul

what do u think maul and asohka talked abt on their turn in the lift lol ???? like for pacing reasons we dont need to kno and she was probably curt w him obviously but what did he saayyyy killing me

mauls earring gets me everytime like i know its there i can see it i am looking RESPECTFULLY

gpa maul

mauls pls help me im old~ voice is really funny to me

the inquisitors using their sabers to fly is already funny but the helicopter noise the blades made was soo fucking funny smdvkdb

like i know that this was a tragedy for asohka and kanan and ezra and mauls entire life is a tragedy and vader and the inquisitors also did not have a good time there but these episodes made me laugh so much and thats why its a comedy now

maul assigned grandpa at the kanan

ezra just has an evil holocron now i guess ???

asohka fucking DIED and we didnt even get to see the fight im literally so mad like i love violence let me see it 😤

they just pushed maul over the edge

like begone away from the plot

u red and angery grandpa

how tired of being pushed off of things do you think maul is at this point? do u think he'll develop a fear of hights ? much to think abt

what do u think maul was doing after he got thrown off the temple tho like obviously he was unconscious or he wouldve rematerialized on the ledge he was thrown off like a video games character if he wasnt but like do u think he was like *spongebob voice* "oh well. back to the dump. to the dump to the dump to the dump dump dump..." or if he just laid there for a minute

"my apprentice" yeah your apprentice, maul. "your" apprentice is a little RAT boy who's worse at being bad than he is at being good, maul. -_- typical.

"hey ezra whos the red crazy guy ?" "oh thats my grandpa"

mauls genuine excitement when he said "we're on the same side now :)" hskdhdkbdkdbd baby no

do u think at any point one of the writers were like "how do we show like via visual metaphor ezra's-and therefor any padawan's- struggle not to fall to the darkside?" and mr filoni's eyes started glowing as he responded "i know a guy"

its ~grandpa maul~

i wonder who vader was expecting to find at this sith temple tho like did he have any idea

did maul know either?? probably not. i bet he was kinda excited to see lady tano like "bitch u survived too :D!!"

the sith baking "u need two to pass" in everything in the temple is also funny to me like. they really would rip themselves apart as a group otherwise dndjdmd go off with that

maul just. blinding kanan. oOh (gay ooh) hes fucken blind now brugh. he did That.

im pretty mad that they didnt cut to maul's reaction to being called grandpa tho like did he think abt that at all, did he call ezra his apprentice because kanan used a familial term or was it more like he started doing the math like oh maybe i am about that age wait did he ever have sex before the bisection like did he have the time did ol' palpy let him or give him The Talk like obviously everyone in star wars is a virgin like hera and kanan havent even kissed yet wtf- except maybe hondo but like if maul ever DID find himself in that situation..................... oh my god he COULD be a grandpa.................

[padawanlost]

Its ironic. People say that the views and opinions of people like you (and me), i.e defending Anakin and being critical of the Jedi without actually hating them are the norm. The same people talk about "holding him accountable" for his actions is if it were a new and radical idea: but when you suggest any other character is responsible for THIER actions, they become angry and saying that you "think the Jedi deserved to be killed". Apparently he;s the ONLY character who is to be deemed responsible for his actions. Anway, such people claim they are presenting uncommon opinions and going against the mainstream.

Yet they get thousands of notes within days, and we're lucky if we get 300. That alone says that they're not the minority and thier views are the norm.

That’s because (self)victimization sells. Saying people are “ruining your fandom experience” is much more interesting than saying ‘I don’t agree with these opinions’.

As for what you said about ‘jedi hate’, we don’t even have to get into fandom territory to understand how unreasonable the arguments are. We just have to look at the Dave Filoni and how the fandom perception of him and his work have changed in recent years.

When The Clone Wars premiered he was hailed as the savior of star wars, the guy who could do no wrong. There were petitions for him to take over SW.  But now he’s evil because he confirmed in recent interviews what he already had said years before and what his show was pretty blatantly about: the Jedi Order was flawed. Not evil, not bad, not deserving of cruel and untimely that….just…flawed.

Yet, this was more than some fans could handle so now he’s a Jedi Hater too. Anyway, I’ve been a PT fan for almost 20 years now I’ve never seen anyone say the Jedi were evil and/or deserving of genocide. but, yeah, if you list to a certain group of tumblr fans, anyone who points anything remotely negative, even a small detail, about a the jedi order they automatically becomes jedi haters who want the jedi dead.

When you thrive on that mentally – all or nothing (the jedi were PERFECT or EVIL) – I guess it does seem like everyone else is against you.