#findingmytrueself

[eudomene]

#findingmytrueself

“Sebaik-baiknya rumah adalah bisa pulang ke diri sejati.”

belakangan baru mulai dapet lagi sadarnya untuk menyelesaikan PR hidup yang masih panjang.

kedepan nanti, pastinya akan lebih dikuliti lapisan-lapisan hati ini sampai diri bisa melebur ego dan hidup sesuai dengan misi jiwa sebenarnya. puji syukur energinya mampu bikin aku tetep bergerak maju dan terasa lebih terarah. masih pelan but I believe it moves me, and I moved.

nangis rasanya bisa kembali pulang & berproses dan akhirnya diijinkan melihat rumah sebenarnya.

nangis karena hati bilang "kemana aja, ayo sini masuk masuk, jangan kejauhan Iagi ya"

[bluebettiesboutique]

Something different I decided to work on. #bluebetties #gettingbacktobasics #findingmytrueself #fashiondesigner not #seamtress #elegantfabrics #seguinsfabrics #knitfabrics #holidayfabrics hair accessory with a twist! #hairaccessories #vintagesanta I'm more than just cotton prints https://www.instagram.com/p/CIj61QsHdW7/?igshid=173c380mow6n9

[mytrueself22-blog]

It’s been a while but I’m really trying to get better! I started on this picture about two months and clearly I wasn’t ready for the message. But I think I’m ready now. The more I learn myself the more I realize that the safe life isn’t for me. I need something new and I need to discover my true potential. So what am I waiting for?

[cloverbeclover]

La amistad es una de las cosas más importantes que me hace sentir viva.

Mai mình có hẹn đi ăn với các chị. Tình bạn 86 - 96 -98 thật là làm mình thấy mừng mừng tủi tủi. Vì mình có thể làm bạn với nhiều người và nhiều độ tuổi hơn. 

Ơ nhà mình cũng có mẹ làm bạn, hai thế hệ nhưng lại có thể hòa hợp và chia sẻ những khác biệt thế hệ và chấp nhận sự khác biệt của nhau. Đó là điều tuyệt vời làm sao. 

Thật sự cảm kích cuộc đời vì những mối nhân duyên tốt à tôi gặp phải, tất nhiên mình cũng cảm thấy khá ổn với những nhân duyên bản thân cảm thấy hông tốt :))

Gần đây thi thoảng lại hiện về cảm giác và suy nghĩ mà mình không muốn. Nhưng có lẽ những niềm vui góp nhặt 5p, 7p mỗi ngày đủ để mình không còn nhiều thời gian nghĩ về nó và thấy nó là những suy nghĩ bình thường như bao thứ lóe lên trong cái đầu nhỏ bé của mình mỗi ngày. Mình đang nghe Dear me của Taeyeon và càng cảm nhận sự yêu bản thân và tin tưởng vào bản thân mình hơn. Cho dù là mọi thứ khó khăn, mọi chuyện mình không mong muốn và không cảm thấy thích thú diễn ra hàng ngày như này. Mình cũng biết trân trọng nó hơn bở có những sự việc như vậy xảy đến thì cuộc sống mới cân bằng, tốt và xấu, đem và ngày, âm và dương. Có lẽ mọi thứ xảy ra đều có lý do như vậy. Lời an ủi này có lẽ ai cũng sẽ chọn tin vào vì bất cứ hoàn cảnh nào nếu nghĩ nó theo hướng tích cực vì nó đều tốt cả mà. 

À đó nhắc đến thì mình cũng mới nhận ra hôm nay lúc đang ngắm nhìn cảnh vật lướt qua khi trên tầu đi làm. Hôm 14/6 vừa rồi mình có ngồi viết ra hết những điều mà mình vũ trụ mang đi, viết kín một trang giấy để mang đi đốt nhưng đặc biệt là mọi điều xấu đó trừ vấn đề sức khỏe xấu thì tất cả mình đều có thể viết ra được nhờ tìm nghĩ ngược lại của những tính từ và sự việc tốt. Có lẽ mình là người lạc quan và luôn muốn hướng tới cuộc sống tích cực nên mới có thể có chuyện như vậy chăng? Con đư��ng tìm hiểu chính mình làm mình hào hứng quá nhưng phải luôn kiên trì, kiên nhẫn với chặng đường này nhé. 

Sớm thôi mình cũng tìm được người có thể nhìn thấu, có thể hiểu bản thân mình như cách mình có thể chấp nhận. 

Dear no one vẫn là bài hát hiện lại dành cho người này đó haha. 

Mong sự tích cực cũng dành cho buổi chitchat ngày mai với các chị ^^ 

[artbyfionajae-blog]

I am me! 🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋#iamme #iamnotlikeeveryoneelse #idontwanttobeanyoneelse #artistgirl #thefutureisfemale #femalepainter #femaleartist #womanpainter #italiangirl #gypsygirl #findingmytrueself

[trinettelcollier]

#newbeginnings #healing #movingforwardinlife #selfcareissexy #nomorefear #buildinghealthyrelationships #findingmytrueself #RIHDADandMOM #SHIBEL

[mytrueself22-blog]

December’s Mission: Putting My EGO in check!

Fihttps://youtu.be/KBRIvaq_990

Along with my therapist, I watch Ralph Smart videos to help me in between my sessions. I discovered that a lot of my issues have to do with my EGO so this month I want to get it in check. 10 things Ralph said to do

1. Stop assuming. In my job I catch myself assuming things mostly about the adults around me. I have learned that some of my bad assumptions about some people turned out to be wrong, and unfortunately vise versa. I also need to stop assuming who I am and actually get to know who I am. 2. Power. I have been working on realizing that the world does not revolve around me, and when people do things that I don’t necessary agree with or I think is against me, I have taken time to take a step back. I realize that maybe something is going on in their lives, and that it really isn’t to hurt me. 3. Finding out what the EGO feeds on. His EGO feeds on fear. I believe mine does too. Each video he makes it aware that what we actually eat determines how we feel. (He’s a raw vegan) I am thinking about trying it. He says that LOVE is what will set you FREE, and I desperately need that.  4 &5. Letting go of Control. Everyday I will tell myself that I am not in control of anything except how I see/love myself. I cannot control how people see me. My worth is not determined by how people perceive me. (Ralph suggests that we go out more to actually realize that we are not the center of the universe) Realize that “Life happens even when you are not there.”  6. Look at old pictures and see how you used to look compared to how you look now. I am going to do that today actually. As I look at myself, I am going to see if my EGO has increased since then, and i can tell you now that it has. (We are so consumed in trying to prove ourselves as greater) but as children we are free. One of my homework assignments for therapy is to write to my younger self.  7. Look for the heart connection. (Realize that we are more alike than different)This is how I know I am meant to be somewhere helping the world. I do not believe we need all of these things that separate humans. For example Ralph mentions having no borders. We  8. Respect that everyone you meet is a mini universe. I have to respect that everyone is a universe and has their own destiny. Other people have their own reality, There is not one correct way to live. Once we discover that one and your universe combines in harmony, it will be a magical thing. 9. The EGO isn’t always bad. The EGO can be your biggest cheerleader: The EGO can be that boost that you need to make a leap and a change. It can boost your confidence and still be humble.  10. Become present: The EGO lives in the PAST and the FUTURE! I have caught myself doing that in my head a lot. I am always thinking of the past and the future. I forget to live in the present. The EGO dissolves in the present. On my way to work, I try to be present. Last week I started to do it. Meditation is a way to be present. If we spend too much time stuck in the past or focused on the future... We cause anxiety issues, We cause panic attacks. We forget to live in the moment. 

These are the things I learned from this video. Throughout the month, I am going to share how my journey with each step is going. 

[mytrueself22-blog]

Yesterday, while leaving work, I felt a sense of pure joy. I took a minute to think about who or what was the cause and I felt a strange sensation.... because the cause of my joy was myself, and I can’t remember the last time I felt that way. It felt rejuvenating. I want to feel this way everyday.

[mytrueself22-blog]

Day 2: I really want to color a picture everyday. It teaches me things about myself that I usually ignore. Today while coloring I caught myself being lazy. I didn’t want to color every detail. I asked myself why did I have to color everything? Why not leave something white? I got a little frustrated with myself. Why can’t I leave something blank? Why do I have to fill in something? As I thought about that a memory popped in my head. Every time I’m in an enclosed environment such as an elevator… I have to make noise, sing, or talk to someone. It’s like I can’t stand the silence. As I colored I tried to understand why I can’t take silence. The answer is… is that I’m not sure why silence scares me… or is it because I equate silence with emptiness? Is being silent the same as being empty or does a hit dog holler? Or can I be both? Am I able to be silent and vibrant? I believe so. I’m going to try to work on it. I plan on using this time in my life to be okay with silence and deal with everything that seems to make silence unbearable. Coloring can be a great release and I’m loving it so far.

Playlist: Dark Days x Local Native. Don’t wait remix x Mepei & Chance the Rapper. Pure Heroine album x Lorde. Pink Polo Album x Masego & Medasin

[mytrueself22-blog]

Day 4: It’s simple… Love is the answer. Throughout this piece I thought about my past and I began to love it because it’s what’s making me who I am today. I thought about past mistakes, lovers, heartaches, disappointments, and best decisions. Each event happened for a reason and changed me for a reason and for that I have myself to Love. So loving myself will answer a lot of unanswered questions.

Playlist: Only by the Night album x Kings of Leon. Watch the Throne album x Jay-Z & Kanye West.

[mytrueself22-blog]

Day 5: I know it’s been a while, but I’m working on being consistent.. It felt good to get back to coloring. I missed it. This message meant so much to me. In therapy I’m learning that most of my negative thoughts about myself stem from wanting to be perfect. I’ve realized that there is no perfection.. No one is perfect. It’s ok an illusion. I’ve learned that I am meant to make mistakes. That’s what helps me grown. I’ve learned that I do not know all of the answers and that’s prompted me to learn more. I know that I may do things people I care about may not agree with but as long as it isn’t hurting me. I can do what makes me happy. I’m forgiving myself for pst mistakes more and more everyday. Yes I still have days where I am filled with dread, but I push through it because I know it is all a process and everything is going to fall into place as long as I trust myself and continue to grow (glow). Progress is better than perfection and I’m progressing daily. Playlist: I feel it coming x The Weekend. Riot! Album x Paramore. 808s and Heartbreak x Kanye West. First 5 songs of The E.N.D x The Black Eyed Peas.

[mytrueself22-blog]

Day 3: Today was a simple page with such a powerful message. Lately this task has been very difficult for me in fact, some days it felt impossible to do. I have issues with holding on to things that happen in my dreams. Last night I dreamed of a hypothetical situation and it hurt me to the core. I often wonder why my subconscious is so hurt, but then I realize it’s because I’ve suppressed so many feelings… that the only way to deal with them is in my dreams. Since I decided to let everything go, I still have these hurtful dreams HOWEVER, I have learned to shake them off when I awake. This process is so hard for me, but I am making it. I take the negative thoughts and bad dreams and I dissect why I feel this way and I embrace those feelings. Then eventually I become okay. I am striving to think more happy thoughts.

Playlist: Thank Me Later Album x Drake.

[mytrueself22-blog]

Day 1: As I colored this picture, I thought of different ways to do different things… I found myself thinking too much about what next color to choose instead of focusing on the beauty of the color I was coloring with. I’ve been told that I do this with my everyday life.. I’m too busy being stuck in the past or too focused on what my next move should be instead of stopping and enjoying what is going on in that moment. As decided to “just go with it” my picture became more and more beautiful to me. It was beautiful because I went with what felt right at that moment and I didn’t think about past pages I colored or which color looked better next. I simply colored (lived) in the moment. This is one of my goals for life.. to simply live and enjoy the moment (life)

Another lesson: As I started “feeling” for the next color instead of over processing, I found my self doubting my picture. I even wanted to rip it out. I thought that I used too many colors and none of it made sense. I thought that I should’ve kept it a pattern or limited my color choices. BUT as I am writing this I am realizing this was deeper than the picture. This is how I look at myself. Lately I’ve been thinking that nothing in my life is making sense and I’m just making a mess. I still feel that way and I’ll probably continue to feel that way for a while. However after I finished thought about how much I enjoyed coloring the page and how I loved letting go. I realized that I need to do just that with my life. I need to embrace this uncertainty. I need to embrace change. I need to push through and feel everything that is meant to be felt because when I am complete with this stage in my life… oh what a beautiful picture it will turn out to be.

Playlist: Tangle EP x The Hics Vows Album x Kimbra