#forbidden broadway

[droughtofapathy]

"Welcome to the Theatre": Diary of a Broadway Baby

Forbidden Broadway: Merrily We Stole a Song

September 14, 2024 | Off-Broadway | Theatre 555 | Matinee | Musical | Original | 1H 30M

If you're unfamiliar with this off-Broadway parody show, Forbidden Broadway began in 1982 and has existed in over a dozen iterations over the decades. This particular version had been Broadway-bound for a fall opening this season at the Hayes. That did not come to fruition. And it's better off for it. This scrappy little laughriot belongs in a slightly dingy off-Broadway venue. It would lose all charm in a Broadway house, no matter how small the Hayes is.

This one aims its sights at the most recent Broadway season, though in true "make fun with love" fashion, only punches up. (No matter what a gold mine the flops of last season are, it would just be rude...) But absolutely shredding Eddie Redmayne's performance? Fair game. Look, this show takes cheap shots, and relies on lowbrow humor. And it's funny, it really is. I've seen a previous iteration in the regional circuit, and it was charming there too. This one has three strong comedic actors and one great vocalist who is unfortunately over her head when it comes to the laugh lines. But Jenny Lee Sterns could easily carry the whole show on her tiny back. We love a middle-aged woman who can commit to physical comedy.

Verdict: A Lovely Night

A Note on Ratings

[musicalrecs]

Reminder: I'm posting Forbidden Broadway music/clips daily until I either get bored or the ask box gets some asks.

Today's clip: the Newsies sequence from Forbidden Broadway Alive & Kicking (2014).

All us Newsies gotta have nicknames so you can spot us dancing. I got a crutch, so I'm Crutchie. Specs wears glasses, Race is the fast one, and Little Dick--

[sondheims-hat]

October 27, 2023: Forbidden Sondheim, a parody revue, begins at the NY's Green Fig Cabaret Theatre.

[transfemgeorgecostanza]

The Nathan Lane impersonation is, technically, terrible, but the "thank you" after the singular slow clap is also very poignant

also i quote "travesty tomorrow, parody tonight" a lot, even more than "tragedy tomorrow, comedy tonight" i think

[crisp-sweet-pink-lady]

Something I did not anticipate when I got into the new Monster High reboot: every time I see someone mention the character Twyla, my brain instantly calls up this track from Forbidden Broadway:

Specifically the lyric "Got a call from a weird lady, calls herself Twyla" (referring to Twyla Tharp).

[lesbianishstuff]

Anyone have the 2012 edwin drood boot with Stephanie J Block? Pleaseeee

[stardustandrockets]

MIDNIGHT DUET🎶

Thanks to Montlake and NetGalley for the free review copy. Book available now.

I haven't really watched Phantom of the Opera, but when I was approached to read and review Midnight Duet, a gender swapped version, I jumped on it. A friend of mine in middle school was obsessed with the musical, so it always makes me think of her.

I'll start out by saying that I enjoyed this one overall. However, the main characters in this dual pov book (Erika and Christof) are INCREDIBLY horny and could barely be in the same room together at the beginning without wanting to rip each other's clothes off. As a sex-averse asexual, I found the frequency of sexual thoughts/actions off-putting and almost DNFed at the 18% mark. There was a semi-public masturbation-for-show scene that icked me out, but I pushed through and am glad I did because I enjoyed the overall story:  struggling ex-broadway performer inherits historical opera house (and attached brothel) in small-town Nevada and is on a mission to save it despite her family's reputation in town; German Hair Metal front man has just been dumped in the worst way and is looking for a distraction by renting out said opera house to work on the band's first album in English. The chemistry is undeniable. It was just super heavy-handed, in my opinion, but I know a lot of you like that kind of thing. Think Chloe Brown level spice.

The characters were well developed (the dual pov really helped set the story up), I absolutely adored Sybille (spelling?) the gothy/witchy bassist, and the fact the Erika had rats made me super happy (don't worry, nothing bad happens to them). It was well paced, engaging, funny, and steamy.

If you enjoy steamier and open-door romance, forbidden romance, unlikable heroines, gender-swapped stories, forced proximity, insta attraction, and/or German Hair Metal, this is the book for you.

Rating: 4 stars Spice: 🌶🌶🌶

CW: fire/fire injury, sexual content (full list on StoryGraph)

[cielospeaks]

me taking screenshots and realizing that ricky blinks like a shoebill bird

a true classical music boi. we stan

also this image has that mega mind no binches energy and i appreciate it. no salon concerts?

[mostlysignssomeportents]

How the NYPD defeated bodycams

Anything that can't go on forever will eventually stop. When American patience for racial profiling in traffic stops reached a breaking point, cops rolled out dashcams. Dashcam footage went AWOL, or just recorded lots of racist, pretextual stops. Racial profiling continued.

Tasers and pepper spray were supposed to curb the undue use of force by giving cops an alternative to shooting dangerous-seeming people. Instead, we got cops who tasered and sprayed unarmed people and then shot them to pieces.

Next came bodycams: by indelibly recording cops' interactions with the public, body-worn cameras were pitched as a way to bring accountability to American law-enforcement. Finally, police leadership would be able to sort officers' claims from eyewitness accounts and figure out who was lying. Bad cops could be disciplined. Repeat offenders could be fired.

Police boosters insist that police violence and corruption are the result of "a few bad apples." As the saying goes, "a few bad apples spoil the bushel." If you think there are just a few bad cops on the force, then you should want to get rid of them before they wreck the whole institution. Bodycams could empirically identify the bad apples, right?

Well, hypothetically. But what if police leadership don't want to get rid of the bad apples? What if the reason that dashcams, tasers, and pepper spray failed is that police leadership are fine with them? If that were the case, then bodycams would turn into just another expensive prop for an off-Broadway accountability theater.

What if?

In "How Police Have Undermined the Promise of Body Cameras," Propublica's Eric Umansky and Umar Farooq deliver a characteristically thorough, deep, and fascinating account of the failure of NYPD bodycams to create the accountability that New York's political and police leadership promised:

https://www.propublica.org/article/how-police-undermined-promise-body-cameras

Topline: NYPD's bodycam rollout was sabotaged by police leadership and top NYC politicians. Rather than turning over bodycam footage to oversight boards following violent incidents, the NYPD suppresses it. When overseers are allowed to see the footage, they get fragmentary access. When those fragments reveal misconduct, they are forbidden to speak of it. When the revealed misconduct is separate from the main incident, it can't be used to discipline officers. When footage is made available to the public, it is selectively edited to omit evidence of misconduct.

NYPD policy contains loopholes that allow them to withhold footage. Where those loopholes don't apply, the NYPD routinely suppresses footage anyway, violating its own policies. When the NYPD violates its policies, it faces no consequences. When overseers complain, they are fired.

Bodycams could be a source of accountability for cops, but for that to be true, control over bodycams would have to vest with institutions that want to improve policing. If control over bodycams is given to institutions that want to shield cops from accountability, that's exactly what will happen. There is nothing about bodycams that makes them more resistant to capture than dashcams, tasers or pepper spray.

This is a problem across multiple police departments. Minneapolis, for example, has policies from before and after the George Floyd uprisings that require bodycam disclosure, and those policies are routinely flouted. Derek Chauvin, George Floyd's murderer, was a repeat offender and had been caught on bodycam kneeling on other Black peoples' necks. Chauvin once clubbed a 14 year old child into unconsciousness and then knelt on his neck for 15 minutes as his mother begged for her child's life. Chauvin faced no discipline for this and the footage was suppressed.

In Montgomery, Alabama, it took five years of hard wrangling to get access to bodycam footage after an officer sicced his attack dog on an unarmed Black man without warning. The dog severed the man's femoral artery and he died. Montgomery PD suppressed the footage, citing the risk of officers facing "embarrassment."

In Memphis, the notoriously racist police department was able to suppress bodycam disclosures until the murder of Tyre Nichols. The behavior of the officers who beat Nichols to death are a testament to their belief in their own impunity. Some officers illegally switched off their cameras; others participated in the beating in full view of the cameras, fearing no consequences.

In South Carolina, the police murder of Walter Scott was captured on a bystander's phone camera. That footage made it clear that Scott's uniformed killers lied, prompting then-governor Nikki Haley to sign a law giving the public access to bodycam footage. But the law contained a glaring loophole: it made bodycam footage "not a public record subject to disclosure." Nothing changed.

Bodycam footage does often reveal that killer cops lie about their actions. When a Cincinnati cop killed a Black man during a 2015 traffic-stop, his bodycam footage revealed that the officer lied about his victim "lunging at him" before he shot. Last summer, a Philadelphia cop was caught lying about the circumstances that led to him murdering a member of the public. Again, the officer claimed the man had "lunged at him." The cop's camera showed the man sitting peacefully in his own car.

Police departments across the country struggle with violent, lying officers, but few can rival the NYPD for corruption, violence, scale and impunity. The NYPD has its own "goon squad," the Strategic Response Group, whose leaked manual reveals how the secret unit spends about $100m/year training and deploying ultraviolent, illegal tactics:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/04/07/cruelty-by-design/#blam-blam-blam

The NYPD's disciplinary records – published despite a panicked scramble to suppress them – reveal the NYPD's infestation with criminal cops who repeatedly break the law in meting out violence against the public:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/07/27/ip/#nypd-who

These cops are the proverbial bad apples, and they do indeed spoil the barrel. A 2019 empirical analysis of police disciplinary records show that corruption is contagious: when crooked cops are paired with partners who have clean disciplinary records, those partners become crooked, too, and the effect lasts even after the partnership ends:

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/2378023119879798

Despite the risk of harboring criminals in police ranks, the NYPD goes to extreme lengths to keep its worst officers on the street. New York City's police "union"'s deal with the city requires NYC to divert millions to a (once) secret slushfund used to pay high-priced lawyers to defend cops whose conduct is so egregious that the city's own attorneys refuse to defend them:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/03/26/overfitness-factor/#heads-you-lose-tails-they-win

This is a good place for your periodic reminder that police unions are not unions:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/07/28/afterland/#selective-solidarity

Indeed, despite rhetoric to the contrary, policing is a relatively safe occupation, with death rates well below the risks to roofers, loggers, or pizza delivery drivers:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/01/27/extraordinary-popular-delusions/#onshore-havana-syndrome

The biggest risk to police officers – the single factor that significantly increased death rates among cops – is police unions themselves. Police unions successfully pressured cities across American to reject covid risk mitigation, from masking to vaccinations, leading to a wave of police deaths. "Suicide by cop" is very rare, but US officers committed "mass suicide by cop union":

https://www.nytimes.com/2021/10/12/us/police-covid-vaccines.html

But the story that policing is much more dangerous than it really is a useful one. It has a business-model. Military contractors who turn local Barney Fifes into Judge Dredd cosplayers with assault rifles, tanks and other "excess" military gear make billions from the tale:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/07/10/flintstone-delano-roosevelt/#1033-1022

It's not just beltway bandits who love this story. For cops to be shielded from consequences for murdering the public, they need to tell themselves and the rest of us that they are a "thin blue line," and not mere armed bureaucrats. The myth that cops are in constant danger from the public justifies hair-trigger killings.

Consider the use of "civilian" to describe the public. Police are civilians. The only kind of police officer who isn't a civilian is a military policeman. Places where "civilians" interact with non-civilian law enforcement are, by definition, under military occupation. Calling the public "civilians" is a cheap rhetorical trick that converts a police officer to a patrolling soldier in hostile territory. Calling us "civilians" justifies killing us, because if we're civilians, then they are soldiers and we are at war.

The NYPD clearly conceives of itself as an occupying force and considers its "civilian" oversight to be the enemy. When New York's Civilian Complaint Review Board gained independence in 1993, thousands of off-duty cops joined Rudy Giuliani in a mass protest at City Hall and an occupation of the Brooklyn Bridge. This mass freakout is a measure of police intolerance for oversight – after all, the CCRB isn't even allowed to discipline officers, only make (routinely ignored) recommendations.

Kerry Sweet was the NYPD lawyer who oversaw the department's bodycam rollout. He once joked that the NYPD missed a chance to "bomb the room" where the NYPD's CCRB was meeting (when Propublica asked him to confirm this, he said he couldn't remember those remarks, but "on reflection, it should have been an airstrike").

Obvious defects in the NYPD's bodycam policy go beyond the ability to suppress disclosure of the footage. The department has no official tracking system for its bodycam files. They aren't geotagged, only marked by officer badge-number and name. So if a member of the public comes forward to complain that an unknown officer committed a crime at a specific place and time, there's no way to retrieve that footage. Even where footage can be found, the NYPD often hides the ball: in 20% of cases where the Department told the CCRB footage didn't exist, they were lying.

Figuring out how to make bodycam footage work better is complex, but there are some obvious first steps. Other cities have no problem geotagging their footage. In Chicago, the CCRB can directly access the servers where bodycam footage is stored (when the NYPD CCRB members proposed this, they were fired).

Meanwhile, the NYPD keeps protecting its killers. The Propublica story opens with the police killing of Miguel Richards. Richards' parents hadn't heard from him in a while, so they asked his Bronx landlord to check on him (the Richards live in Jamaica). The landlord called the cops. The cops killed Richards.

The cops claimed he had a gun and they were acting in self-defense. They released a highly edited reel of bodycam footage to support that claim. When the full video was eventually extracted, it revealed that Richards had a tiny plastic toy guy and a small folding knife. The officers involved believed he was suffering an acute mental health incident and stated that policy demanded that they close his bedroom door and wait for specialists. Instead, they barked orders at him and then fired 16 rounds at him. Seven hit him. One ruptured his aorta. As he lay dying on his bedroom floor, one officer roughly tossed him around and cuffed him. He died.

New York's Police Benevolent Association – the largest police "union" in NYC – awarded the officers involved its "Finest of the Finest" prize for their conduct in the killing.

This isn't an isolated incident. A month after the NYPD decided not to punish the cops who killed Richards, NYPD officers murdered Kawaski Trawick in his Bronx apartment:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/12/04/kawaski-trawick/#Kawaski-Trawick

The officers lied about it, suppressed release of the bodycam footage that would reveal their lies, and then escaped any justice when the footage and the lies were revealed.

None of this means that bodycams are useless. It just means that bodycams will only help bring accountability to police forces when they are directed by parties who have the will and power to make the police accountable.

When police leaders and city governments support police corruption, adding bodycams won't change that fact.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/12/13/i-want-a-roof-over-my-head/#and-bread-on-the-table

Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en

--

Tony Webster, modified https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Minneapolis_Police_Officer_Body_Camera_%2848968390892%29.jpg

CC BY-SA 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/deed.en

[mariacallous]

Patti Lupone In Gypsy

[blindmanbaldwin]

There's nothing I can recognize; this is nowhere that I've known. With no sign of life at all, I guess that I'm alone, And I feel so secure that I know this can't be real but I feel good. Cuckoo cocoon have I come to, too soon for you?

“Cuckoo Cocoon” - Genesis

[musicalrecs]

Reminder: I'm posting Forbidden Broadway music/clips daily until I either get bored or the ask box gets some asks.

Today's clip: In the Heights from the original production of Forbidden Broadway Goes to Rehab in 2009.

I am Miranda and you better memorize my name My reason for fame is greatly exaggerated Exacerbated by the fact I cannot act When things were complicated I incorporated too much exposition In rapid deposition You wishing I would shut up? Well shove it. I wrote this rap and love it.

[nobody-nexus]

Influencer's Other Forms (Sinful Circus)

The Influencer can shapeshift into the others of the cast! Well... kind of. More like a twisted mimicry of them, as a way to twist their thoughts on themselves

Of course, Ragatha's the Influencer's favorite form. It sees Ragatha as such a fun person to torment, especially with her predicament. It keeps this form the most

Influencer Jax isn't as common, but multiple people have seen it. Its favorite thing to do when in this form is open its mouth in various horrific ways JUST to fuck with people, finding it fun

Influencer Gangle is a weird one, since it usually transforms into her whenever it wishes to play the 'theater kid' aka mocking Gangle's past as a Broadway star. It sings songs of various kinds the most in this form

Influencer Kinger is one that's actually seen the least. Since Kinger's already gone, it doesn't find fun in turning into him- but it WILL if it can find a reason to do so. Sometimes it uses it to torment Queenie within the cellar, since not even they're safe from its antics

The only one who knows about Influencer Pomni is, well, Pomni herself. It only transforms into this form just to torture Pomni one on one. This form isn't the most common, but it certainly hurts the most out of them all

And finally, Influencer Zooble is the most unstable variation of these transformations. It uses this form to scare EVERYONE- mostly in dark or forbidden areas. Zooble has seen that form once and it wasn't pretty

[holysaintscathedral]

Books for the Hierophile

Similar to my fic recommendation list, the following is a list of books that might be of interest to any hierophile (Christian based hierophilia anyway). The majority of books here are erotica or romance (het, mlm, and wlw) and physical copies can be found at most major in-person and online book sellers, unless stated otherwise. The titles are listed in alphabetical order with a brief synopsis.

A Knight for the Runaway Nun (#2 in Convent Brides series) by Carol Townend - An evocative friends-to-lovers story set in Medieval France. From novice nun…To unexpected bride! Lady Bernadette is poised to take Holy Orders when Sir Hugo of Nérac, her father’s captain of the guards, arrives with news that her sister is expecting. Petrified of childbirth since her mother died, Bernadette races home. But now that she’s left the convent, her father wants her wed! There’s only one solution: marry Hugo, her childhood friend. But can she risk consummating their marriage and conceiving…even if his kisses are unbearably tempting? 

Beautiful Sinner (stand-alone novel in Beautiful series) by Sara Cate - “Lord, help me…A beautiful, young American girl wound up stranded far from home on my doorstep. When she begged me to stay, I did what a good priest would do, and I said yes. But a good priest wouldn’t spend his days thinking about the fullness of her ruby red lips or feel the sting of envy with the way she draws men to her like flies to honey. A good priest would have stopped things before that first touch. And he certainly wouldn’t have given into temptation so easily, but when Cadence Thorn walked in, she brought me to my knees. A good priest takes his vows seriously.But I am not a good priest.” Only available in Kindle Edition.

Collared: The Story of a Sir and Her Priest by Melissa Cohen - "Collared: The Story of a Sir and Her Priest" is the true story of a real-life Master/slave relationship between Melissa, a dominant woman, and Joseph, a submissive man ... who happens to be a Roman Catholic Priest. It's the story of their forbidden love and the emotional depths they explore, all the while having to keep their relationship a complete secret. But as their love deepens and her ownership of him grows more real, Joseph is faced with the choice between honoring his commitment to God and leaving the priesthood for a chance at the freedom to love.

Dirty Priests and Preachers Gay Erotica Collection by T. J. Royalty - Men of the cloth – without the cloth! Priests exploring forbidden urges. Preachers committing unholy sin. These stories will have you on your knees and praying for mercy! Compilation and individual stories featured are only available in Kindle Edition.

Dancing Priest (#1 in Dancing Priest series) by Glynn Young - Michael Kent... A young man studying to become a priest finds love, and learns that faith can separate. A university cyclist seeking Olympic gold finds tragedy, death and heroism. A pastor thousands of miles from home seeks vocation and finds fatherhood. Sarah Hughes... A young woman living abroad finds love and loses family. A university student meets a faith she cannot accept. An artist finds faith and learns to paint with her soul. Dancing Priest is the story of Michael Kent and Sarah Hughes and a love, born, separated, and reborn, in faith and hope.

Everybody Calls my Father, Father: The Scandalous, Passionate Love Affair Between a Catholic Priest and a Broadway Actress by Tim “Dr. Hope” Andres - Everybody Calls my Father, Father is based on the true life love story of the author's parents. The character of a tenacious young woman, Bouvette Sherwood, who is a successful New York Broadway producer and actress, drives the plot. In the mid 1940s Bouvette meets and falls in love with a charming alcoholic, Hughie Hewitt. He has a secret though, which he keeps from her during their intense courtship-he is a Catholic priest! Their love story unfolds into a kaleidoscope of intrigue, suspense, betrayal, and romance.

La Faute de L'Abbé Mouret (The Sins of Father Mouret) by Émile Zola - Serge Mouret, is an obsessively devout priest, aspiring to perfect purity and sanctity. A serious illness leaves him with amnesia, and no longer knowing he is a priest, he falls in love with his nurse Albine. Together they roam an Eden-like garden called the "Paradou," seeking a forbidden tree, beneath whose boughs they make love. Anguish follows, as the abbe regains his memory and returns to the church. In this, the fifth novel in the Rougon-Macquart series, Zola concentrates on the conflict between church and nature; celibacy and sexuality. A film adaption called The Demise of Father Mouret, starring Francis Huster and Gillian Hills, was released in 1970.

In Love With a Priest by Damilola Babs - In Love With a Priest poses a question to us all; when God chooses to hold a man, does he ever let go? Find out in the story of Maya Alpha Lange. A story of love, hurt and God's true peace.

Keeping His Commandments by Elle Keating - Desire, lust, love…You’re not supposed to feel those things for a woman, and you’re definitely not allowed to act on them when you’re a Catholic priest. I had taken vows; vows that I’ve upheld for eight celibate years, and had made a promise to God that I swore I would never break. But then I met Eva, my stepmother’s estranged twenty-eight-year-old daughter, and she made me forget who I was. What I was.I prayed for guidance.I prayed for the strength not to give into temptation.My prayers went unanswered…or so I thought

Léon Morin, Prêtre (The Passionate Heart) by Béatrix Beck - In a small French town during the Occupation, Barny is a young, wayward, sexually frustrated widow, living with her little girl. She is also a communist militant who long ago decided that the easiest way was the best. One day she enters a church, randomly chooses a priest and starts criticizing the religion. But the priest is Leon Morin, who is young, handsome, clever and altruistic. He believes that any sin can be expunged by a good dose of faith, and does not offer her the reaction she was expecting. She is disturbed. She starts frequenting Morin, impressed by his moral strength, while he makes it his mission to steer her onto the right path. A film adaptation starring Jean-Paul Belmondo and Emmanuelle Riva was released in 1961.

Love Letters of a Portuguese Nun by Gabriel de Guilleragues - The "Portuguese Letters" were published anonymously in 1669, alleged translations into French of letters written by a Portuguese nun to a French officer who had loved and left her. Recent scholarship suggests Guilleragues was their author. Reminiscent of the exchanges between Heloise and Abelard of an earlier time, the letters display a remarkable acuity of psychological insight into the mind of a woman in love and on the edge of hysteria.

Lesbian Nun Erotica: Forbidden Age Gap by Madeline Vey - A new student at an all girl's catholic school finds herself as the center of attention of her insatiable classmates. As the only... uncorrupted girl left on campus, she'll be forced to watch and tempted by the unspeakable acts committed by the other girls... until she's begging them to include her in their sin.

La Madre (The Woman and the Priest) by Grazia Deledda - The Woman and the Priest is the story of a struggle between a priest, his lover and his mother. It is an unusual book, both in its story and its setting in a remote Sardinian hill village, half civilized and superstitious.

Naughty Nuns and Passionate Priests: Three Erotic Shorts by Fallon Angel - Three stories of untouched nuns, guilty excitement, and willingly broken vows. This collection combines the Sin and Sacrilege trilogy into one volume.

Nun Better by Joanie Lindenmeyer with Carol Tierheimer - What happens when two women commit to serving the Catholic Church as nuns-Brides of Christ, taking vows of chastity-but fall passionately in love?They must defy the Church's rules against same-sex relationships and blaze a bold trail for a joyous, adventurous life together-at a time when LGBTQ people could be killed for being gay and same-sex marriage was decades in the future.Now Joanie Lindenmeyer and Carol Tierheimer are sharing their courageous and blissful, 40-year journey in NUN BETTER: An AMAZING Love Story. Their breathtaking love story showcases the magic and miracles of love, and two women's unshakable devotion to spreading joy and peace in the spirit of God.

Original Sinners: The Nun and the Priest by Alexis Honeywell - The moment that Serena and Luke met, they were both consumed by an overwhelming attraction. Of course it was forbidden - he was a priest, and she was a nun - but they couldn't help themselves. Suddenly their chaste, celibate lives felt like a prison, and they longed to be free, to lose themselves in passion together, even if the consequences altered their lives forever.

Pretty Parishioners (4 book series) by Willa Pope - Only available in Kindle Edition (1. Punished by the Priest, 2. Passed Around by the Priest, 3. Pleasuring the Priest and 4. Performing for the Priest). Each smutty stand-alone installment of this series chronicles the escapades between various women and a priest.

The Priest, His Lady and the Drowned Child by Mary Cavanagh - For twenty years, Father Ewan McEwan, a Roman Catholic priest, has enjoyed a passionate long-term relationship with Marina Proudfoot, an older woman of great beauty and refinement, whose two-year-old daughter and husband were tragically drowned in a boating accident. But when Marina unexpectedly dies, the emotional fallout affects not just Ewan, but Marina's son, Timothy, his lover, Roger, and Roger's wife, Sally. Now Ewan must survive not only his profound grief but also the secret revelations she leaves behind.

The Priest by Patsy George - From the time Joseph Grant is a young child he dreams of being a priest. He is an honest, hardworking and likable boy that rises above tragedy. He befriends the neighborhood parish priest, Father Marc, whom remains Joseph's father figure and mentor throughout his young challenging life. Joseph is the quintessential child grown out of pure unadulterated love. His young childhood and adolescence is filled with dreams of pastor ship and unconditional love for all mankind. Then he faces and surmounts the most heart wrenching experience a young man could possibly face. After rising above heartbreak he sets out to fulfill his childhood dream as a responsible young adult. Joseph's life takes an unexpected turn while at college. He meets a young lady named Emily, whom he has an instant attraction to. Their friendship turns to innocent love, and gives Joseph a tough decision to make. His ultimate decision, in his confusion, is to attend a seminary in which he has been accepted at. He forces himself to complete the journey he started, while never forgetting his Emily. While attempting to accomplish his lifelong dream, he endures some shocking surprises and discoveries. Some of his fellow seminarians are not of the same moral fiber as Joseph. These and other revelations help him make a decision to defy what he views as unfair and inaccurate manmade restrictions placed on priests. Joseph gains a following that not even the Pope can deny. He eventually rocks the very core of the Vatican by just being himself.

Priest by D. Greg Denton - Chase was a child of privilege. Max was not. Chase had lofty goals. Max had one, to survive high school. Chase took it upon himself to rescue Max. Max just wanted to be near Chase, but then they both graduated and went their separate ways. A few years later, they came together again, by chance. But they were separated when Chase chose a life of service to God and His people over the man he loved. Fate would bring them together one more time and it was up to Chase to do the right thing… by Max this time. Would their love survive all they’d already been through and what awaited them next? Available in Kindle Edition.

The Priest’s House: Pregnant to a Man Who Cannot Resist the Calling of God by Claire Marie - The coldest day in hell for Jo Burnside is the day her lover, Fr. Michael Toner, takes on responsibility for a remote parish instead of fleeing with her to Canada and a new life. Jo accompanies Michael to his new parish. She expects disapproval if not outright condemnation for seducing a 'holy' Catholic priest. What she finds is a parochial house reeking of betrayed innocence.The lovers are found naked in bed together, then a patient under Jo’s care in the local hospital, haemorrhages and dies. This threatens a black depression in Jo who has just discovered that she is pregnant. The priest, Michael, has his own problems, including crippling injuries. Michael would work himself to death without Jo's restraining influence. In the new parish, he discovers a resentful congregation, a young mother without any hope of redemption, and he finds himself pursued by a sex-obsessed failed nun. Then the bishop comes storming into their lives, threatening excommunication if Jo doesn’t renounce Michael forever.

Plum’s Priest Daddy (standalone novel in Clover City Little series) by Honey Meyer - Plum Brolingtide is the rockabilly fashionista who owns Caffeinatrix--Clover City’s premier cafe. The buxom barista’s favorite hobby? Flirting outrageously with the priest who frequents her establishment. Gideon Davies is the handsome and unflappable priest at All Saints church who has a weakness for almond croissants, flat whites, and disciplining mouthy young women. Plum and Gideon get to know each other in the biblical sense and beyond but a tragedy at Plum’s cafe forces their hand to put a label on their affair. Sure they have a great time together, but can Plum see Gideon as a prospect for Mr. Right instead of just Mr. Right Now? And will Gideon be swayed by the chorus of voices in his congregation calling his relationship with Plum improper and ungodly? Available in Kindle Edition.

Pet Priest (3 part BDSM MLM series) by Natasha Ryder - Only available in Kindle Editions (1. The Dreams, 2. Waking Life and 3. Beyond Dreams) Father Sean O'Leary has been struggling with a secret his whole life. A secret that could ruin his entire career, not to mention put his immortal soul in grave danger. He has a male lover who comes to him in his dreams, and not only that, but that lover is an agent of evil, a demon named Adriel. No one has never made Sean feel like Adriel does, sinful, forbidden, perfect acts of pure lust that could ruin him forever. Every time Adriel touches him, Sean feels like he loses more of himself to the demon, and that's not a good thing because Adriel doesn't seem entirely happy to simply remain in his dreams. Can love truly conquer all, even between a priest and a demon?

Sister Matthew and Sister Rose: Novices in Love by Carol Anne Douglas - Maureen Collins, recently named Sister Matthew in the novitiate at St. Euphrosnye’s convent in Western Maryland in 1962, doubts the existence of God. She entered the convent for several reasons: she thinks being surrounded by believers might help her believe; she knows she’s attracted to women and wants to avoid pressure to date men and marry; and she feels guilty about something that happened when she was in high school. She quickly falls in love with Rose Clancy, now Sister Rose, another novice who also is attracted to women. Rose is more religious, but she reciprocates Sister Matthew’s feelings. She grew up with an alcoholic mother and found a refuge among the nuns who taught her. As the two move through postulancy and the novitiate, they encounter many challenges from the strict rules to memories of their respective pasts. The memory of an old murder intrudes in the present.

Sins of the Sister I: Genesis, a Romance Novel by Elle Doan - In the summer of 1917, Angelique and her older sister, Charlotte, are two lovely but sheltered Creole sisters from the countryside who are entering the convent in New Orleans. The sisters are best friends but Angelique has always lived in Charlotte's shadow because of Charlotte's great beauty and tremendous academic ability. On their way to New Orleans, they encounter a dashing yet mysterious priest, Father Pascal, and Angelique is immediately enamored with him. Living in the harsh and divided city of New Orleans finally forces the two sisters deal with discrimination, class differences, and even romance. Angelique, who has never desired marriage or even sex, must confront her growing feelings towards Father Pascal, who is also haunted by his torturous past. Her rivalry with her sister and other wealthier nuns threaten Angelique's relationship with Charlotte. The Reverend Mother takes an immediate dislike to the free-spirited and free-thinking Angelique, and wants to expel her from the nunnery. Will Angelique remain in the convent? Can she repair her relationship with Charlotte? Can she resolve her feelings towards the brooding and aloof Father Pascal? Only available in Kindle and eBook Editions.

The Sacred Sins of Father Black: A MM Forbidden Priest Romance by St. John Starling - Father Sebastian Black might be a saint, or he might be the Devil himself. Either way there is nothing simple or innocent about this small town Catholic priest. When the FBI sets their sights on the town of Hopewell, they cannot know what they will uncover. With a spate of forged rare wines flooding the auction houses of the world, even communities as charming and innocuous as Father Black’s church are subject to scrutiny. It's only when Father Black meets the man they've sent that the walls he has built around himself begin to come tumbling down and all of his secrets are laid bare one by one. Quentin Day is brilliant, charismatic, and, above all, dedicated to the truth — everything an FBI agent should be. In practice, all this does is force him to stand alone in a corrupt system. Ordered to a remote town in pursuit of forgers, he finds himself irresistibly falling for the local priest. This is a tragedy for him. After all, priests are off-limits, aren’t they? Or is Father Black more than meets the eye? Available in Kindle Edition and on Payhip.

Saints and Sinners (10 part series) by Amie Barnes - Are we saints or are we sinners? These priests are both as they lead their flock but become tempted by one in their parish. An anthology series depicting various priests and their fall from grace. Only available in Kindle Edition (1. My First Confession, 2. My Biggest Temptation, 3. The Sweetest Sin, 4. In the Father’s House, 5. The Father’s Discipline, 6. The Father’s Protection, 7. The Father’s Obsession, 8. The Father’s Troublemaker, 9. The Father’s Downfall, and 10. The Father’s Siren).

Sacrilege: A Forbidden Dark Romance Anthology - Corruption. Sin. Greed. Temptation. Nothing is sacred. Not the priest who looks at you with hunger etched into his rugged face. Not the nun who hides her secrets in the scars on her arms. Definitely not the theology professor who keeps his student long after class is over. A different kind of worship. A wicked type of praise. A devil's paradise and an angel's ruin. Get on your knees, but don't bother calling out to Him. No one can save you from sin.

Sweetest Sins: A Lesbian Romance Novella by Aurora Lemaire - Lonely, free-spirited Lily dreams of becoming a nun. She's been a good Catholic girl all her life but that changes the day she catches her idol, mysterious nun, Jane, reading a steamy lesbian romance. Now Lily is questioning everything she once knew. What else is the brooding Jane hiding? Can Lily risk discovering her secrets when the Mother Superior is already determined to send her packing? Or will the desire building between them destroy everything they've both worked for? Only available in Kindle and eBook Editions.

Slutty for Sin by DeeDee Cupps - Sister Anne always wanted to be a nun. When Sister Catherine joined the convent, that lifelong dream was replaced with hot, wet desire. How long can they withstand their growing lust? Only available in Kindle and eBook Editions.

Taking the Priest by Lola Bowie - When the sweet new choir teacher, Elodie, confesses her desires to gently peg and dominate the man of her dreams, Ben, her priest, has little idea that it is him she desires. Her fantasy awakens a deep longing inside of him. Is he brave enough to go on a journey of erotic pleasure and self-discovery? Could the young submissive priest have found another altar to worship before? A steamy short story containing gentle femdom, only available in Kindle and eBook Editions.

Trained by the Priest by Betty Black - I waited until marriage. But now I need to know what to do on my wedding night. And who better to teach me than my priest? In order to please my husband, I'm going to turn to the one man I trust above all else: the priest I've known my whole life. He'll teach me all the moves I need to make sure I'm a good little wife, willing and eager to please! Only available in Kindle Edition.

The Thorn Birds by Colleen McCullough - The Thorn Birds is a chronicle of three generations of Clearys—an indomitable clan of ranchers carving lives from a beautiful, hard land while contending with the bitterness, frailty, and secrets that penetrate their family. It is a poignant love story, a powerful epic of struggle and sacrifice, a celebration of individuality and spirit. Most of all, it is the story of the Clearys' only daughter, Meggie, and the haunted priest, Father Ralph de Bricassart—and the intense joining of two hearts and souls over a lifetime, a relationship that dangerously oversteps sacred boundaries of ethics and dogma. A television mini series adapted from the novel starring Richard Chamberlain and Rachel Ward aired in 1983.

To Love a Priest by Victor S. E. MouBarack - When Father Ignatius’ past catches up with him there is no way to escape the consequences for him and those around him. He must face facts regardless of how seriously they could affect his vocation as a priest. “TO LOVE A PRIEST” is the most controversial book in the Father Ignatius series and deals with questions on many peoples’ mind as yet unresolved by the Church. A gripping story of conflict between conscience and dogma, treating a delicate subject with compassion and forgiveness.

TamIng Rebellion by Hanna T. Corner - Kayla is abrasive and rebellious, getting herself kicked out of college for starting fights and buying bikes, so she's sent to a nunnery in order to correct her behavior. But she wasn't expecting nun Marlee, who has a voracious and suppressed sexual appetite sets out to spank disobedient Kayla into submission. Only available in Kindle and eBook Editions.

Trilogy of the Poor Horny Nuns by C. P. Waterman - A collection of stories comprising A Poor Nun's Endowment, The Poor Nuns in Revolt, and Return to the Poor Nuns, previously published during 2013-2014.  Set in England, 1348: Mary is a country girl with a tomboy streak. When she reaches adulthood and finds herself excluded from the company of the boys with whom she grew up, she rebels and her father consigns her to a convent. On the journey there, she is approached by an old crone and granted one wish; on an impulse, she makes a strange choice: she wants a penis, so she can be accepted in the young men's group. But fate consigns her to the priory, where Mary unwittingly falls under the spell of the evil Sister Benedicta, mistress of the novices; when Benedicta discovers Mary's anatomical transformation, she makes her her own private sex-pet and Mary finds herself installed as a hermitess, confined to a private cell... where only Benedicta can come and use her to fulfil her own sexual desires any time she wishes. The local priest is interested, too. Is there no escape? A chance visit by a face from her lost past - and the simultaneous arrival of the Great Pestilence (The Black Death) - offer her the opportunity she needs to get away. Will she grasp the moment with both hands? And what then, when the known world is turned upside down? Two more fantasies follow; on both occasions, Mary cannot resist returning to her friends to enjoy more intimacy at the convent. And, with her peculiar attribute, the nuns cannot resist her. And nor can the priests.... This (poorly titled) compilation edition is only available in Kindle and eBook Editions.

Unholy Desires by D. Williams - “As a spiritual leader of the community, I have been looked at for many things. Advice, guidance and sometimes just friendship. You meet a lot of different people in all stages of life while working for the Church but never have I met someone like her. The almost instant desire she stirs in me that I can not shake is unnerving. She tests my restraints, and I find myself forgetting my vows but, even worse, wanting to forsake them. It’s been said many times God only gives the hardest battles to his strongest soldiers, but this is one war I’m afraid I will lose. A Priest is only a man that can resist his unholy desires.”

The Village Priest (#3 in A St. Francis Hill Mystery series) by Tina Proffitt - Father Christian Hyman, a village priest in St. Francis Hill, South Carolina, loves Misty Sumner with all his heart, yet his dedication to his calling means that he cannot ever have her. Christian must discover what has happened to his dear friend, why she's afraid to leave her house and won't even look out the window that overlooks the steep valley beyond. Misty's life is unrecognizable to her since moving out of her house and into a cottage that sits at the edge of town overlooking the valley. When she learns of a nun's death, thrown from the high abbey wall into the very woods surrounding her home, many years ago, she must put her detective skills to work to assist the spirit that haunts her. Silas Baecere was a nineteenth-century village priest in St. Francis who loved Ada Gardiner very much, yet could not have her either. Memories of his life with Ada haunt him day and night. Her familiar scent lingers whenever he is alone in the house they once shared. Silas must come to grips with the kind of man he wants to be or lose Ada forever. Ada Gardiner, a nun whose loyalty to Father Silas knows no bounds, finds herself inextricably in love with him, which means disastrous consequences for them both. Her work as a scribe has taught her many things about magical, healing herbs, and the people of her village rely upon her for her medicinal wisdom. It also makes some fear her and want to hurt her. Ada must face her worst fear, being separated from her love.

Vows We Break by Serena Akeroyd - Vows. Savio lives by them. Dreams. I exist in them. Obsessed with a picture, I'm in Rome to get over writer’s block, but more importantly, I've come to the Eternal City to find someone. Savio is a broken soul. A French-Italian priest in the capital of the Catholic world, he preaches religious tenets he no longer believes in. He’s also the man I'm looking for. A priest who makes sinners pay. Who makes them burn for the temptations into which they fall. I exist to tempt him, my sole purpose is to save him, and my end goal is Savio—in my bed. My heart. My life. He's a fallen soul, desperately in need of a future that takes him away from the sinners who deserve to lose their lives for the evil they reap. Can I make him break his vows, make him fall to save both our souls before the Devil can embrace us both? 

The Wayward Priest by William N. McKelvy - Falling overboard, almost drowned, an attractive girl goes under a personality change. Her memory gone, only her survival instinct left, she is taken to a priest's African missionary. Lilly wakes up night after night in her bed exhausted, blood on her mouth and gown. She begs the Father to lock her up at night. The two of them fall in love. She crashes in a plane, he thinks she is dead. He goes to Ireland, leaves the priesthood, falls in love, then, then tragedy strikes. He returns to Africa dreaming of Lilly until one day ...

[myclutteredbookshelf]

I've been inspired by @ofliterarynature to ask Bookblr for help with unhauling some of my TBRs. If you reblog this poll, feel free to explain your choice. I'd even be happy to hear your reasoning for why I shouldn't toss a certain book, as it might encourage me to get around to reading it.

I've copied the book blurbs below the cut for your consideration.

Ink by Alice Broadway

From the second you're born, every achievement, every failing, every significant moment are all immortalized on your skin. There are honorable marks that let people know you're trustworthy. And shameful tattoos that announce you as a traitor. After her father dies, Leora finds solace in the fact that his skin tells a wonderful story. That is, until she glimpses a mark on the back of his neck . . . the symbol of the worst crime a person can commit in Saintstone. Leora knows it has to be a mistake, but before she can do anything about it, the horrifying secret gets out, jeopardizing her father's legacy . . . and Leora's life.

We Set the Dark on Fire by Tehlor Kay Mejia

At the Medio School for Girls, distinguished young women are trained for one of two roles in their polarized society. Depending on her specialization, a graduate will one day run her husband's household or raise his children, but both wives are promised a life of comfort and luxury, far from the frequent political uprisings of the lower class. Daniela Vargas is the school's top student, but her bright future depends upon no one discovering her darkest secret—that her pedigree is a lie. Her parents sacrificed everything to obtain forged identification papers so Dani could rise above her station. Now that her marriage to an important politico's son is fast approaching, she must keep the truth hidden or be sent back to the fringes of society, where famine and poverty rule supreme. On her graduation night, Dani seems to be in the clear, despite the surprises that unfold. But nothing prepares her for all the difficult choices she must make, especially when she is asked to spy for a resistance group desperately fighting to bring equality to Medio. Will Dani give up everything she's strived for in pursuit of a free Medio—and a chance at forbidden love?

Bride of Clay by Markus Zusak

The breathtaking story of five brothers who bring each other up in a world run by their own rules. As the Dunbar boys love and fight and learn to reckon with the adult world, they discover the moving secret behind their father's disappearance. At the center of the Dunbar family is Clay, a boy who will build a bridge—for his family, for his past, for greatness, for his sins, for a miracle. The question is, how far is Clay willing to go? And how much can he overcome?

[noxexistant]

thoughts on uksies sprace, very hyperfixed on them right now

- mystery anon

uksies sprace are FANTASTIC

uk spot is brash and loud and involved, she dresses plainly but makes herself known when she’s in the room, she’s not as much cold-scary as broadway spot as she is aggressive-scary. when jack scabs, she has to be held back by one of her girls from absolutely wrecking him. race is rough and edgy and constantly fighting to be heard, he dresses noticeably fancier than all the other newsies - he has a dang pocket square. he smokes his cigars casually, and he’s physical when he argues - especially with jack - but he’s equally physical when he’s showing affection.

last time i saw the show, during once and for all, race and spot were crouched beside each other when everyone’s crouched with their lanterns, only really looking at each other, faced towards each other close enough that they could lean in and bump their foreheads. when the strike is won, they chest bumped - spot all but threw herself into it, and race seemed all too happy to throw himself right back.

the two of them absolutely have the energy of race having the biggest crush on spot for as long as he knows her but having no idea how to approach it. and spot…sort of knows (maybe needs her girls to help her know) but, regardless, she is absolutely not down for it. race’s interest is pointless at best and destructive at worst, spot can’t risk borough politics getting influenced by some dumb manhattan lieutenant falling over his own feet because he saw a girl. so she ignores all his flirting and teasing with her usual manners, scoffs at him, gives as good as she gets but never lets him get any ideas.

but then, during the strike, she actually gets to know race better than this marginally tense relationship they had before, usually marked by race being painfully awkward in his usual charming attempts when they crossed paths around brooklyn - and, okay, sure, maybe spot has been going to sheepshead more than she used to - but suddenly they’re actually interacting on common ground. and race is serious, focused, devoted, not half-playfully flirting or the worse alternative of trying very hard not to. he does, however, make some dumb joke while they’re working in the basement getting the banners printed, and it makes spot shamelessly snort - loud enough that ritz hushes her - and race knows he’s screwed. she’s so beautiful, screwing her nose up as she laughs, covered in mud and ink and bruises.

but spot’s screwed too. race is handsome and charming in how utterly not-charming he is, and he tells stupid jokes and his breath smells like cigar smoke and he kind of smells like cologne. he’s got his sleeves rolled up as he works, cigar tucked into his pocket. spot knows she likes him far too much in the moment she sees him walk over to jack and do their forearm-cross move that falls into the tight hug of two brothers.

and spot is unquestionably the one who makes the first move. and every first move subsequent to that. she knows full well that race would never.

they kiss for the first time when he keeps staring wistfully at her lips like it’s forbidden fruit or something, chewing on his own bottom lip. the street is empty, they’re wandering around late after a day of selling, so she just rolls her eyes and grabs him and kisses him hard. then kisses him again, softer. and he tastes like cigar smoke too - and his cheeks are all flushed when she pulls away. he definitely smells like cologne, something fancy he stole from someone.

she’s screwed.

she kisses him again. and starts laughing when he does - this dizzy sort of giggle like he can’t believe what they’re doing - and snorts against his lips. they’re both dumb lovestruck messes when they get back to their respective lodging houses.